#u don't know this (bc i never mentioned it) but the original version of this au was the ACF hunting peter down for stealing from them
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one-joe-spoopy · 1 year ago
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I do actually know how loud peacocks are, because there's a whole flock of them on my campus and it's highly illegal to kick them (they're loud and noisy and smelly but istg if I ever see someone kick a peacock it's on sight because it's a bird, it can't do evil because it's got a tiny little bird brain!!!) Also, to me they sound like creepy uncles pretending to be kids catcalling. Is that highly specific and strangely unsettling? I don't know, I just think they're yell-y and annoying.
The radio clock is actually a throwback to the Monster's Reflection and (according to Juno in the script) it belonged to Sarah herself. Yes, the clock is smashed-up because twice in a fit of rage (after her office was broken into by Jackshit McFuckFace and after killing Benzaiten) she started breaking things in her apartment. It's a representation of the destruction wrought by her again and again and again in Juno's life. And yeah, 11:45 was approximately Ben's time of death according to the paramedics (supposedly. That's what Juno knows, at least, according to the way his whole chest felt on fire the entire time on the drive to the apartment and when it finally stopped. (Remember, Juno and Benzaiten are two halves of a single whole. Juno's pain was Ben's pain is Juno's pain.)
The fact that Juno gets the peacock from Purgatory (that's where Ben currently resides in) (don't worry, he's safe and happy there where nothing can hurt him anymore because he's already dead), a dead empty space where only the deceased can rightfully enter instead of an actual peacock speaks volumes to me. Yes it represents new beginnings and protection but this peacock is a dead thing and the only thing it can protect is the dead but Juno's not dead. Yet. See where I might be leading with this? (Because I sure as hell might have an idea) (just maybe)
Mick, to me, is as trapped in his life as Juno feels his, constantly slamming into dead-ends and shut doors and a downwards spiral he can't smile and shrug his way through. The universe loves him, sure, but it also likes to see what it can throw at Bartholomew Mercury before he can't take any more. It wants to know how far is too far when it comes to one of her favorite chewtoys.
To Juno, the Warden would be Sarah Steel as he remembers her in his childhood, the first authority figure in his life, the first in a long line of figures abusing their authority over him. The Warden would look and sound like her, tall and menacing, but without her sneer and barely-disguised tone of disgust, and I think it's for the best that Juno has never gone to see it, for the sake of his sanity and mental health.
Ruby is in its silver shapeshifting goo form, and likes taking on the shape of various appliances and creatures in M'tendere's Purgatory workshop, always in its signature acid green. It doesn't want or need any more than what it has, but it does leave with Jet on their final run-in together.
If Juno were to punch you, hypothetically speaking, you'd probably break a bone. I'm ripping this straight from the Dresden Files; the charms carved into his rings and bracelets gather kinetic energy each time he moves them, be it to shake someone's hand, to crack his knuckles, swing his arms, anything, and when it's released at once in, say, a punch, the resulting force could shatter a bone (and maybe break his own hand too, so he's got to be careful there too. He is still human, after all.)
The tattoos on Peter's human skin are done by human hands and those cost money in and of themselves, but the magic in them is all supernatural. He had to give up a lot of things to get that magic into the tattoos (he got an ex-court magician to do it, which was a very tense and painful set of appointments because he's not on very good terms with the particular ruling family of that Otherworld and if he was caught, either because the magician snitched or Lady Luck was messing with his business, it would definitely not end well)
Peter's latest heist was definitely for a mask, that's for sure. You're absolutely right about magic being all about perceptions, and one of the best ways to maintain your facade is to wear a mask. While he can somewhat disguise himself in his human skin, he can't hide in his fae form. That's where the mask comes into play—it's made of cream-colored matte stone, with long feathered lashes, heart-shaped lips (the upper painted black and the lower bare save for a single stripe down the center), and a matching neckpiece trimmed with soft feathers and fluff, and the expression is serenely neutral enough not to cause offense but with just the slightest hint of a knowing smile. The artist does not part with their wares easily and Peter could definitely never afford the price (he just barely got out of one debt, he's not gunning for another) so he just decides to steal it, like any self-respecting master thief would.
Technically Small Fry used to be a stray that hung around outside of Rita's apartment building that she would feed until it just snuck into Juno's car and into his apartment and refused to leave (she would nip his fingers and hid under his bed whenever he tried to get her out until Juno got fed up and bought her a rabbit hutch).
If you have the option to customize yourself according to your wildest fantasies, why not? Maximalism is Rita's middle name and she wants to feel as beautiful on the outside as she is on the inside. The tattoos and jewelry and general perky attitude also happens to be a great disguise in and of itself because Rita is fae after all and a fairly powerful one too. She's a predator up there with Vespa and Peter—hell, she lured Juno (unintentionally) into her apartment and had him giving her his name in the span of a few hours (he's lucky she didn't want to inflict any harm on him because he very well could have). When he finally crawled his way back to his apartment after his encounter with evil soup doctor Miasma, she basically hijacked his comms and the other electrical appliances and tore him a new one for disappearing on her for two whole weeks. It was terrifying but compared to feeling your eye being pried out of your skull over the course of a fortnight it wasn't all too scary.
If you were staring at Rita and her glowy panel stomach she'd be flattered and very giggly about your gawking. After all, it's always fun to make people stare! Also she would ask you what's your favorite view and program herself to it if she really liked you.
Juno actually takes Peter up into his apartment to keep him there for a while until he can think of somewhere else to stow him away. Peter obligingly (reluctantly) transforms into his (very naked, oh boy) human skin and Juno gives him his coat and gets him all the way up there, then locks his door (don't worry about Peter getting out, everything's enchanted and the front door's heavy enough that even Juno struggles to get it open despite his kinetic energy rings) and tells Peter to stay right there on the floor. If he moves, Juno shoots.
Trust me, I can pull this trigger faster than you can move, The hunter says with his hand on the gun and an eager glint in his eye that tells Peter that he's itching for a reason to aim it between his eyes this time, and Peter gets the feeling that he isn't bluffing.
Juno cuffs him to his bed when he has to leave, or he'll bring Peter with him on the condition that he behaves. If he steps out of line, Juno will break his neck (he's not kidding about the broken neck).
Hey! So, uh, I have some more stuff for the fae-hunter jupeter au, if you'd like to hear it? Regarding some more about the background and things and the other characters and also some intrusive thoughts Juno has regarding the cannibalism?
Oh fuck yeah babey lay it on me. This is the best Steel Twin Birthday Present and no other holiday or event going on irl I could've woken up to ever! And also does it mean anything if I say I have more thoughts on my monster hunter au bc I have a lot of new thoughts about it
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itsjaywalkers · 5 months ago
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You stole someone’s whole boxer au u weirdo
not this.............. not this again.................
SIGH
i've been getting these anons a lot lately (again) so i'm just gonna . respond to this one and address this whole situation one more time and then drop it because it's actually exhausting and it's getting . so old so if u keep sending this kind of asks you'll be getting blocked <3
there was never an idea. the original ask only said 'boxer james'. that's It. i responded to it, and somehow it escalated into a lot of brainstorming and random scenes and hcs that lasted for weeks and that i had a lot of fun with. at the beginning, it was supposed to stay as a silly au on tumblr. but i ended up getting very invested and developing my own version of it, and that's when i decided to write it
am i gonna include some of the details that we discussed here?? ofc!! especially bc a lot of those ppl asked if i would, and if it fits, i'm more than happy to, bc this is something that was born here and thanks to a lot of ppl!! but that's mostly it. everything else comes from me!! sure, these asks inspired me a lot, and maybe i would've never written a boxing au if it weren't for it, but that's all there is
the person who sent the first ask actually told me that they were ecstatic about me turning the whole thing into an actual fic, and since i mentioned i didn't have a preference when it came to reg's character, they told me it'd mean a lot to them if it was trans reg, so i agreed to it!! i also love trans reg so it was Perfect!!
if i'm being honest, the actual boxer au is different from all the ideas we were throwing around here in itsjaywalkers city. sure, the most basic details of it remained, but everything else i came up with, bc it's MY story. and believe me when i say most of u don't even know half of it
i'm sorry u think the concept of boxer aus in itself can be plagiarised. you'll be disappointed to discover that i'm not the first person to write boxer james, and fortunately i won't be the last!!
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ladysophiebeckett · 1 year ago
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Your recent post about Aura María has me wondering something about lfmb. So we know that she is in her early twenties and that she was a teen mom. However, in lfmb, her counterpart Aura María is way older, so we go from someone being immature in their early 20s which is normal and understandable at some extent to someone being immature well into their thirties and it also removed the teen mom aspect of her character which I thought was important. Or were we supposed to think that she was in her 20s 😭? Niurka was almost 40 by that point and it was noticeable, but you never know with Televisa. I also remember you mentioned something about the Mexican adaptation choosing to age up el Cuartel (also why remove Mariana 🥲) and I can see how it impacted the story in some aspects especially with Aura Maria’s character. Why do you think they made this decision? Thank you and good day to you 💖
That post ruffled feathers. It's not being understood or being completely misinterpreted. So, yikes u know.
Anyway, let's continue.
Paula Maria (AM's counterpart) who was played by Niurka was about 39 going on 40. All the women in the cuartel (except for Irmita, whose actress was in her 60s) are in their early 40's. As opposed to the original, their ages range from 20s, 40's and the oldest inesita, in her 60's. I believe AM is the youngest in the cuartel, at about 22\23? Her son is 7, assuming she had him at 16.
The point, I think in the original, is that when you work in an office you're gonna work with people of all ages. Also, when Betty becomes president she has the cuartel run the walkway bc they represent the actual Everyday Woman. She's saying 'Look, all these demographic of women are important and need to be seen and represented'.
They never say Paula Maria's age, I think televisa just didn't care about how it would look or translate. But it does change her storyline if she's being played by 40 yr old and acting like a party girl. They never touch upon it. I truly think we're supposed to be pretend Niurka is 25.
Mind you, I'm not against 40 yr old actresses getting having jobs. I think televisa preferred the cuartel to be made of 'spinsters'. It didn't compute that some of the younger secretaries are single and not ugly but without a boyfriend. So you know, here's some spinsters.
Paula Maria visibly looks 40 and they dress her scantily clad bc, again, its televisa. There's no nuance and the women must be showin' skin for the male demo even tho this is family program. That being said, it changes her storyline significantly (in the visible sense) that she's older and still hasn't gotten her life together. I could understand being annoyed with her. I think a couple of times she also doesn't have access to childcare, so her son (and the other kids) are often hiding around conceptos (fucking up the plot of the adults).
But even if she's older, it still doesn't justify throwing her out on the street. There are women like Paula Maria who love their kids but jump fm relationship to relationship or they like to party a lot--they try to have a life separate fm motherhood--the attempt to have it all but also neglecting aspects of it. I still don't think they should be burned at the stake. But you do wish they would get it together and find a balance. Especially when a child is depending on you. (But again, where is the father to help? Did she procreate alone?? Hello??)
The thing about both versions is that they're probably both told they need to find a man to support them. So part of the whole 'going out' is also them looking for a rich man to marry them so that they'll have financial support. But because of their class, their looks--neither version is taken seriously by men. They're only seen as sexual objects.
And the one person that does see them as a person (and cares about them), Aura Maria\Paula Maria isn't ready to be with them. In AM's case she's not mature enough. In Paula Maria's case I think it was more because he was poor. (Simon later on takes night computer classes so he can get a higher paying job, Freddy doesn't do this, so I think this just builds irritation towards PM bc Simon is doing a lot for her and she still doesn't treat him as well).
Re Cuartel\Mariana's visible absence: Televisa is racist. When was the last time a black person was in a televisa production? Someone who's not the kindly humble black man in Marimar. Exactly.
Her equivalent is Juanita, who's part of Conceptos cleaning staff. For some reason, they dont have her read the cards, she reads caracoles. And then they dont even let her be the number 1 fortune teller bc they bring that annoying psychic. I have a fondness for lfmb but so many of their decisions are so ????
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jakesimfromstatefarm · 4 years ago
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notoriously yours | jay park
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✰ summary: jay park is a rich kid. it’s safe to say he has everything every broke college student on his campus could dream of and more. but the one thing he doesn’t have, which money definitely can’t buy, is a girlfriend. and his friends won’t see of it. literally.
so what happens when his friends bet him to date someone for more than three months? what happens when jay decides that fake-dating someone would be easier than actual dating (because god forbid Jay–the campus’ notoriously known fuckboy–decides to commit to something once in his life)?
and what happens when that someone is you, his childhood best friend he hasn’t spoken to in years..who has absolutely no interest in being in his life anymore?
✰ pairing: jay park x y/n [ft. members of enha]
✰ genre: fluff, comedy, angst | fakedating!au, college!au, childhoodbestfriends!au, (kinda) e2l!au
✰ warnings: cursing, nothing suggestive but jay's a fuckboy so slightly suggestive themes, mentions of parental neglect/leaving, it's hella long (and i thought my last fic was long)
✰ wc: 14.7k (how did i get it this long oh lord)
✰ author's note: picture creds go to original owners/editors! peep that edit of jay that lowkey inspired this entire fic 👀also this took me so, so long bc i lost motivation half way thru and bc college is a thing,,,so i honestly don't know how to feel abt it so pls bare with me :')))) ALSO the dividers are weird bc idk how to add more than 10 pics for the dividers so pls excuse those ٩(× ×)۶i hope u guys enjoy!! <333
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Jay Park is a rich kid.
Jay Park has enough to buy every textbook he needs for his courses without having to look up the free versions online. Jay Park has enough to bribe his professors to let him pass every class with a perfect 4.0 GPA (but because the boy has morals, he doesn't). Jay Park has enough to afford a car to drive to his furthest class from his dorm building instead of walk or bike like every other college student, meaning he also has enough to afford a parking spot on campus (those things aren't cheap!).
Jay Park walks around your school's campus like he owns the place (and considering the amount of money his family has donated to the school, he practically does), looking like he just walked out of your local coffee shop's newest fashion magazine. His blonde hair is never seen untouched, his attire usually consisting of an undoubtedly high-end all-black fit, accessorized with multiple earrings and rings that probably cost more than all the overpriced textbooks you had to rent out this semester. It's safe to say that everyone knows Jay Park.
Bottom line is, Jay Park has everything.
Well, his friends beg to differ.
In their eyes, Jay Park has everything but a simple factor in the equation of love (or whatever love is to the minds of a couple of 19 year olds): commitment.
So yes, it's safe to say that everyone knows Jay Park. Because everyone knows he's the campus' rich fuckboy. (What's a college fanfic campus without one anyways?)
Jay doesn't go unreminded of this by his friends, to the boy's annoyance.
Jay is aware of this on a Sunday afternoon, in his dorm building's first floor lounge, where he and his said friends are having a study session.
They're doing anything but studying.
In fact, no one has any books out or anything. Not a single laptop in site.
"You don't think it's the slightly bit concerning?" Jake's words are muffled as he continues munching on the fried chicken that he spent majority of this study session debating if he should have it delivered through UberEats or not.
"I really don't, no," Jay shrugs as he continues mindlessly scrolling through his Instagram feed. They're having the same argument conversation that they've revisited multiple times over the course of their friendship, one that Jay has been lectured on too many times for his own good. He thinks his friends could become his new parents if they really tried.
"Look at it this way, okay. You're about to graduate college in a couple of years, into the big world. Like the actual, adult world. And that means you'll have to settle down. Which you can't do when you. have. no. commitment!" Jake punctuates each word with a single clap of his hands, desperate to get his point across.
Jay simply rolls his eyes. He looks over to Sunghoon, who's minding his own business, not bothered by the same topic he's heard over and over again. His eyes tell Jay you're on your own, in response to his blonde-haired friend's look of despair.
Jay thinks that maybe he should get new friends. Yes, that's the only solution here.
"My love life," Jay reaches across the table for a drumstick from the greasy tub seated in Jake's lap until Jake swats his hand away, "is none of your business. Also, ouch."
"Uh, it kinda is. Because of you and your reputation around campus, it kinda affects us, your best friends. How do you think we look, hanging out with the guy who's known to ghost every girl in existence after one night with them? No offense to you," Jake deadpans to him. Jay mentally reconsiders the term best friends.
Tough love. Jay tells himself it's tough love.
"Yes, because every girl totally hates Jake Sim, the teacher assistant of a physics class who volunteers at the pet shelter every Sunday and brings their pet golden retriever to campus every two weeks," Jay rolls his eyes at his Australian friend.
Jake sighs. "Okay, then I'm coming from a place of worry for you."
Jay groans. "Again, none of your business!" This doesn't stop Jake. He comes from good intentions, really, but Jay wants nothing more than to stuff the kid's mouth with some of that chicken to shut him up.
"What are you gonna do if one day you meet someone you like, genuinely like, and you screw yourself over because you've never been in an actual relationship before? A real, committed one. Like one that lasts at least three months."
"You don't think I can last three months in a relationship?" Jay questions the boy currently taunting him.
"Honestly? No. What's the longest relationship you've been in?" Jake cocks an eyebrow at his friend across from him.
One month and two weeks. But Jay's smart enough to not say that out loud.
"I can so last over three months," Jay mutters more to himself than Jake.
Jake laughs at that, pausing to take another bite of the drumstick in his hand. "Jay, I am willing to actually bet you. Bet that you wouldn't be able to." He leans back on the couch, the ball now in Jay's court.
Jay freezes, looking up from his phone, narrowing his eyes at Jake.
"Forget it, Jake. He's not gonna agree even if you offered him money," Sunghoon finally perches from beside him. Well he's not wrong. It's not like Jay is exactly in need of more money, per say.
"What kind of bet are we talking here?"
Sunghoon's right. Jay doesn't need the money, but he does hate being wrong. Even if it's over something as stupid as this matter.
Caught off guard by the blonde's answer, Jake blinks blankly at him and takes a second to think.
"Hmm..what about...what about if you can date someone for at least three months, and I mean an actual, committed relationship, then I'll do all of your physics homework next semester."
Jay's eyes sparkle at that. If there's anything he despises more than commitment, it's physics.
"And if I win, you have to buy all of my textbooks," Jake sits back from the edge of his seat with a smirk lying on his face.
Jay pauses to think about it. I mean, what does he have to lose? A couple hundred dollars over college textbooks? No. Because he just simply won't lose.
And maybe he'll learn what it'll be like to actually be in a committed relationship for once. Maybe he'll finally learn what it's like to actually devote yourself to someone, open up to them. He shivers at the thought. Never mind. He'll warm up to it. Baby steps.
Nonetheless, what could go wrong? Even if he does lose, at least his money would be going somewhere productive––towards his friend's education. Jay was probably gonna use that money on something useless like a blanket that resembles a tortilla (a burrito blanket, he calls it)––something he doesn't necessarily need, but must have, he would argue.
"Fine. Whatever, okay. Deal," he grabs Jake's extended hand in front of him and shakes on it.
Jake's impressively smiling at the boy as Sunghoon lets out a sigh, in disbelief with the two guys he calls his best friends.
Jay concludes that this will be easier than his Introduction to Photography 101 course he took his freshman year. How hard is it to find someone to date the Jay Park? Surely, everyone will be lining up once Jay switches his FaceBook relationship status from "it's complicated" to "single".
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Turns out, it's not as easy as his class where all Jay had to do was take pictures of a pretty sunset, slap a VSCO filter on, and call it a day.
He comes to this realization on a Wednesday evening, as he's seated at one of the many study tables lined in the middle of the campus' library, staring down at his phone's dry iMessage app, with his laptop and blank sheets of scratch paper scrambled across the entire table, as an attempt to look half as studious as the other students studying in the facility.
Turns out, being known as the campus' fuckboy who ghosts every girl on campus isn't a good thing when it comes to wanting to find a real relationship.
He comes to this realization after failing to receive a single text back to the many ones he sent out throughout the first half of his day. The ghoster gets ghosted. Oh how the turn tables.
Jay groans dramatically as he tosses his phone on the hard surface of the table, earning himself a harsh shush from the librarian filing books in the aisle beside him.
He sheepishly smiles back as an apology, directing his attention back to his open laptop screen, where his untouched calculus homework stares back at him––his mind preoccupied with the looming threat of Jake's bet. Not that it was threatening in any way, per say, but Jay just hates losing. And from the looks of things, it's safe to say that Jay won't be celebrating any victories anytime soon.
Jay thinks he should just change his identity and just transfer to some boarding school in Switzerland. Yes, that's a much better solution than admitting defeat to Jake.
Jay sighs as he lies his head on the table, figuring he might as well just write the check for Jake's textbooks now. He wonders how he got here in the first place. Not how he got into the bet, and definitely not how he's sitting in the middle of the library, having yet to start his calculus homework due at 11:59PM tonight (he should really start that).
But no, he wonders how he gained the reputation as the campus' playboy. To be fair, his friends (mainly Jake), are constantly reminding him of his notorious habits. But how did they come a habit in the first place?
The idea of being in a relationship is nice, sure, but the commitment that comes with it? The idea of being dependent on someone? It's scary, vulnerable, and one that Jay can't picture for himself.
Maybe some people just aren't meant to be paired. Maybe some people, like Jay, like being independent and are meant to stay that way.
But Jay also likes affection. He likes the fleeting, warm feeling he gets every time he finds himself under someone's sheets. He likes the short-lived comfort he receives from someone else's touch, even though he knows it's going to cease to exist the second he steps out of those bedroom's doors. He just likes affection, simple as that.
That and he's a 19 year old teenage boy with needs, what did you expect?
And so what if he likes the idea of affection minus commitment? Is that so bad? Apparently it is, to people like his friends and the entirety of his school's campus, at least.
At this rate, he might as well pay someone to date him.
Wait. Jay lifts his head off the table's surface in realization.
He might as well pay someone to date him.
There's no harm in that, is there?
He wouldn't have to endure through an endless amount of dates to find someone he clicks with, then continue going on dates with said clicked person, all while trying to develop an actual, serious relationship.
He'll win the bet, get his physics homework done for an entire semester, and some lucky girl out there will be making profit for the small price of hanging out with Jay Park for three months.
And lucky for him, Jay knows the perfect candidate for this scheme.
Simple as that.
Just as long as said perfect candidate says yes.
And as long as Jake and Sunghoon don't find out. Or else Jay might really have to move to Switzerland after all.
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You love your friends, you do.
Hana and Heeseung have been there for you when others haven't––they were by your side when you knew no one entering high school, and they were still by your side when you were all graduating said high school. Needless to say, you're eternally grateful for friends like them.
But right now, in this moment––with you seated in the middle of the campus' library, trying to write your essay, as your two friends blabber on and on about the most recent gossip across from you––your two friends could be your villain origin story.
But again, you love your friends, you do. So you don't have the heart to tell them to leave. You've managed to naturally tune out most of the conversation, anyways, for this––your friends coming to hang out while you're trying to study––is no rare occurrence by any means.
"Oh yeah, Jay Park texted me last night."
You hate how your brain's filter suddenly turns off at Hana's words.
You hate how your ears catch the sudden mention of Jay Park's name.
You hate how the thought of Jay Park gets to even occupy a single brain cell of yours.
You hate how you even know who Jay Park is. Well, knew.
Past tense. Because up until eighth grade––when Jay decided to just suddenly pretend you didn't exist––he was attached to you like a koala to a eucalyptus tree.
And if you had asked past Y/N, ideally, Jay would've never left your side. Ideally, he would've never left you to fend for yourself when entering high school. Ideally, he would've stayed your best friend through out all four years of high school and ideally, you would've eventually told him how you really felt about him after growing up with him all your life. And maybe it would've lead to a completely different story. But for the sake of this fic, we don't live in an ideal world.
So yes, if it wasn't for his attendance at the very same university as you, you would've forgotten about the boy who brought you the painful memories of your childhood.
And since the universe clearly doesn't work in your favor, avoiding Jay Park's existence like he's the plague would have to suffice. And it works.
For the most part.
Until some people, bring him up uninvited into your conversation. Like now, for example.
"When was the last time you guys talked anyways?" Heeseung mindlessly asks as he reaches across the table to grab one of the many snacks you usually bring to your study sessions.
"Uh..like a few weeks ago. Give or take. Whenever you threw your house party. Can't say there was much talking involved however," she teasingly says with a giggle and wiggle of her brows.
Heeseung's rolling his eyes as you scoff and chuck a nearby crumpled piece of paper that was once one of your many essay drafts at her.
She bats it away right as it's about to hit her face as she laughs. "Doesn't matter anyways. He ghosted me the next morning, as he does with everyone else. Telling you this now," she extends a finger right at you, "stay away from Jay Park. That kid's just bad news."
You nod in response, mentally telling her she has nothing to worry about.
Been there, done that.
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College. Ah yes, the very concept of spending four years of your life imprisoned on a campus where you'll be tearing your hair out from stress and spending all your life's savings just for a laminated sheet of paper with a golden stamp at the end of it all. We live in a society.
Because of said college, and all the weight that comes along with it, you had adapted a strict daily schedule in order to not completely lose your mind. It's a simple schedule really, one of a typical college student who's just trying to get by everyday with as little mental breakdowns as possible.
Wake up, get ready, go to class, go to the library to do your homework, walk all the way across campus to get back to your dorm, shower, then sleep. Oh and eat, of course. And maybe if time permits, be an actual social being and socialize.
It's gotten you this far into the college life without dropping out so, you conclude, you must be doing something right.
Sometimes, if you're feeling nice to yourself, you'll tweak the schedule a bit to fit in some exceptions. Maybe squeeze in a little trip to the bubble tea shop that's on the other side of campus, or maybe get dinner at that one dining hall that you don't usually go to because of the unncessarily long lines (but because they serve ice cream, you go anyways). It doesn't matter what the exception is, you still plan it out to fit into your schedule somehow. Everything is planned out.
Sometimes, however, the universe disagrees with your schedule, to your demise. Such as today, for example.
Because what you didn't expect for today was for a particular blonde-haired boy who you haven't spoken to in almost six years (but who's counting?) to approach your table in the library––a table you were sure no one could find you at, as it was quietly tucked away in the back corner, right next to the Astrophysics shelves. Because who browses the Astrophysics aisle for fun? Actually, maybe Jake Sim would. Anyways.
You definitely didn't anticipate a visit from the boy you've been actively avoiding, so you definitely didn't expect the first words coming out of his mouth when he sees you for the first time in six years to be:
"Fake date me."
You blink up at him.
Yeah, definitely not expected.
But you only let it phase you for a split second, until you feel a slight annoyance beginning to bubble up deep inside of you.
"Wow, hello to you too Jay! It's been what––half a decade? Yeah I've been pretty good, thanks for asking!" The sarcasm is practically dripping off your tongue.
You don't know what runs through Jay's mind, but apparently it isn't common sense––or the ability to read the room. Because next thing you know, he's sliding the chair across from you out from underneath the table and making himself at home.
And he's smiling right at you.
Curse him and his smile.
But no, you're not giving into it.
Not yet, at least.
"What do you want?" You deadpan at him when he makes no sign of making the next move.
"A girlfriend," he deadpans right back at you, as if he was casually telling you what he wanted for dinner. As if you two were close-knit friends that could approach one another without any proper greeting. As if you two had kept your friendship all these years. As if you two even had a role in each other's lives.
"Can't help you there," you scoff, deciding to not even question his lack of manners on top of his uninvited presence.
"Aren't you gonna ask me why?"
"Well gee, seeing that the first few words you decided to say to my face for the first time in forever were a demand, a demand to date you no less, then....no," your monotone voice says as you keep your eyes focused on your laptop screen, not daring to look at the boy across from you.
In the Introduction to Sociology course you took your freshmen year, you had learned of one important term: interactional vandalism. Textbook definition being: "ignoring signals of disinterest in a conversation, leading it to an offense."
Your definition being: "are you oblivious or just plan dumb, read the room!"
This was interactional vandalism, alright. Whether Jay's truly oblivious or just trying to annoy you until your head explodes (it's really the former, but you're convinced it's the latter), he takes your signals of disinterest and tosses it right out of his head to continue the conversation.
"I'm stuck in this stupid bet with Jake--do you remember him? He bet me that I couldn't date someone for more than three months and I figured having someone fake date me would be easier than actually dating someone, right? That's where you come into the equation," he proposes as he leans back in his chair, as if he had just finished a sales pitch to a prospective customer looking to buy a car.
You couldn't believe this. You're 98% sure this has got to be a prank. You're mentally preparing for a camera crew to jump out from in-between the library's aisles any moment now and scream into your ears that you've just been punk'd!
The remaining 2% of you, however, wouldn't put it past the two boys to get themselves in such a situation. The last memory you had of Jay and his friends were pretty much their childish selves back in middle school. And by looking at the current scene unfolding in front of you...it's needless to say they haven't changed much.
"Again, can't help you there. Ask one of the many girlfriends I thought you had." Ouch.
"But Y/N, you've known me all your life--"
"Up until you dropped me a few years ago but sure, let's call it that."
"--and convincing other people is gonna make me look--"
"--desperate? Yeah."
"C'mon, Y/N. What do you have to lose anyways?"
"Uh..my dignity? Pride? Self-respect? Sorry Jay, not happening," you turn your attention back to your unwritten essay in front of you, mentally checking out of this conversation. This would be a good time for that camera crew to jump out now.
"Look, no one else is gonna do it, Y/N." Jay has always been stubborn, you suppose. But so are you.
"Yeah, because you've managed to push every being of the opposite gender away from you. You gave yourself this reputation in the first place," you give it to him straight. It's not like you had a relationship with him to uphold anyways––Jay himself broke that friendship years ago.
Jay hates that you're right.
You're always right. He remembers how he used to always go to you for advice and clarity on the world's biggest problems. Granted, the world's biggest problems to him at the time equated to what he should dress up as for the fifth grade Halloween party, but still. A tough decision, for the mind of a ten-year-old.
You abruptly stop typing and begin putting your laptop and textbooks away as you huff in frustration. There's no point in trying to get your work done now. The longer you stay arguing with Jay, the bigger your headache gets. The longer he continues to occupy any part of your brain, the bigger your headache gets.
Getting up from your seat, packed and ready to slam your head into your pillow, you turn to the blonde one last time.
"Look Jay. We went on our separate ways years ago. If you weren't so notoriously known around campus and my friends would stop talking about you, I would've long forgotten you. I'm sorry you're in this situation, really. If I were you, I'd just tell Jake I can't do it. Or don't, I can't tell you what to do. Just don't get some innocent girl involved in whatever stunt of yours this is."
Jay stares at you, mouth agape, as you find your way out of the library and through the main doors. By the time he comes back to his senses, he realizes how he looks plain stupid––standing in the middle of the library, the look on his face screaming befuddlement, to say the least. Jay quickly makes his way out of the building, in hopes of convincing you one last time.
Jay catches sight of your figure already half-way down the walkway that connects the library to the main quad of your school's campus. Geez, you walk fast.
Not fast enough to outrun Jay's legs, however. If Jay running after you through the middle of campus in order to convince you to fake date him doesn't show how desperate he is to win this bet, I don't know what will.
"Wait, Y/N!"
You groan to yourself before turning to face the boy who can't seem to take a hint and leave you alone. You stare at his out-of-breath state as he heaves up and down from the slight jog he had to endure to get to where you are. If you're humored by him chasing after you, you do a good job of hiding it.
He meets your unimpressed state before stating his final proposition: "I'll pay you. Five hundred dollars."
You nearly stop breathing.
Now this catches your attention––after all, you're but a broke college student who's just trying to survive. And preferably not by feeding yourself instant ramen cups every night.
And so, naturally, you begin rethinking about the opportunity presented in front of you. You narrow your eyes at the boy as you weigh your options.
The first problem being, it's Jay Park––the bane of your very existence. You spent the last few years of your life pretending he didn't exist...for good reason. Not only did he do you dirty when you were merely a couple of 13-year-olds, but you just didn't want to be involved with someone like him. Someone known for his nature, someone who left your own current best friend ghosted. And not that Hana herself would care, for she has called herself the "female Jay Park", but you're sure this would be breaking some rule in the girl code handbook. Plus, if you agree to this, you'd be betraying 13-year-old Y/N, the one who decided to never speak to nor think of Jay Park again––which by now you've failed, but you get the gist.
Second problem being, three months is a long time. Three months is practically the rest of this semester, and did you really want to spend the rest of the semester tied down to the label of being Jay Park's girlfriend? There would have to be some negative connotations that came along with that title, right? No offense to Jay, but being his first girlfriend since, what, high school could make you come off as..naive, for lack of a better term. As if the only person you could settle for was Jay Park. As if you barely had any standards for yourself. Again, no offense to Jay.
Needless to say, if your school's debate club had to argue on why you shouldn't be doing this, you're sure the negating side could win with these two reasons alone.
But before you're rejecting the boy currently standing in front of you one last time, you find yourself mentally listing rebuttals.
First of all, you'd be getting paid. And again, you're merely but a college student living the stereotypical broke college student life––burdened by the costs of tuition, textbooks, and midnight McDonalds runs for when you're out of aforementioned instant ramen cups. Five hundred dollars could provide you with more than enough chicken McNuggets to last you the semester, and maybe some more to treat yourself to an online shopping spree.
Second of all, it's not like you were going to do anything better with your next three months anyways. It's safe to say you were too busy being a diligent student to actually look for anyone to date, per say. And if anything, having a fake boyfriend might actually be helpful in your case. Your mom would be off your ass about how you're still single, for one. And two, your friends (though it's really just Heeseung) would stop trying to hook you up on blind dates with guys that you would choose Jay Park over any day (and that really says something).
Third of all, it's Jay Park. As much as you despise the kid, you still know him. He's not a complete stranger to you, no matter how much you try to deny it. It could be worse, it could be a complete rando asking you to date him. At least you two have some sort of history, which would take care of the typical small talk and getting to know each other bit of this equation. And truth be told, you'd be lying to yourself if you said you weren't a tad bit satisfied by the fact that Jay chose you, of all people, to pull off this stunt with him. You don't know if it's the nostalgia of your childhood memories rushing back to you, but it reminds you of the endless schemes you two used to plan behind your parents' backs all the time. Granted, your childhood schemes––such as the both of you faking sickness so you could skip school together––don't even fall close to being in a fake relationship with one another, but still. It's the thought that counts.
All of those reasons plus, Jay isn't the worst to look at. He may have a spoiled reputation, but at least he has his looks going for him, you'll give him that (you're still secretly wondering when and how did he get his glow up, but don't tell him that).
And so by the guidelines of a college student's logic that states the pros outweigh the cons, you come to the overarching conclusion that maybe, this won't be so awful after all.
"Five hundred?" You ask, just for clarification. Jay's immediately nodding at your words. You continue to ponder on your thoughts as he stares at you hopefully.
The silent atmosphere of your campus heightens the tension so much, you swear you're in one of those overdramatic pausing scenes that occur too many times in k-dramas.
You sigh, then nod.
"Okay," you're internally praying that you won't regret this decision. "I'm in."
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The next time you see Jay is at 12:17PM on a Friday afternoon, as you're exiting the doors of the lecture building that's home to your awfully long Capitalism in the Western World class.
You're going down the steps of the building, mentally deciding where and what you're going to treat yourself to for lunch––as the three hour lecture you had just attended drained all the life and energy out of you––when you hear the slight call of your name.
Turning to the source, you're met with a waving Jay, leaning against the passenger's side of his car, parked in front of the lecture hall building you were currently leaving.
Great.
You walk over to where he's casually waiting––he's unaware of all the stares he's attracted from fellow students leaving the same lecture as you. Can you blame them? It's not everyday you see a sleek, black BMW that probably cost more than your tuition pull up in front of your Friday afternoon lecture. It's not everyday you see Jay Park waiting for anyone outside of his said sleek, black BMW that probably cost more than your tuition.
"Hi," you simply let out as you plant yourself in front of him, not sure whether or not to question him why are you here? Surely, he wasn't waiting for you?
"Hi," he smiles down at you. There's a beat of silence. "I was waiting for you."
Bingo.
"Oh. What are you, my chauffeur?" You raise an eyebrow, unimpressed.
"Maybe. I am your boyfriend, after all," he says into the air, loud and clear, as if he wanted people to hear. Well that is the point, you suppose.
But still, all you want to do is smack the smirk right off his face.
Before you have time to put your next question into words, he answers it for you.
"I'm taking you out for lunch," he declares as if you have nothing else planned for the day. Well, to be fair, you didn't have anything else planned for the day. Except for your usual library run. But you figure the library could wait.
"Oh, like on a date?" You raise your eyebrows teasingly at him as you get into the car, Jay holding the door wide open for you. "Is Jay Park treating me to lunch as a date?"
Jay fights the scowl (or is that a smile?) growing on his face as he bends down to meet your eye level from inside the car. "Don't flatter yourself, princess. We've got fake lives to live."
"Call me princess one more time and you won't have a real life to live," you flash him a sarcastic smile and slam the door in his face.
Jay meets his own shocked reflection on the passenger's side window.
Cute.
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"When you said you were taking me out to lunch, I expected like...I don't know...the diner on campus. Not whatever this is," you mutter to Jay as the two of you are brought to your table by a waitress at an upscale sushi restaurant, one that is undoubtedly out of your usual budget, but for sure an upgrade from your dining hall's pizza you were planning to have. You should've figured as much, the drive here was a little more than out of the way from campus, and who are you kidding, it's Jay Park you're eating with.
You stare down at your current outfit, which consisted of a hoodie you've owned since your junior year of high school and leggings that you threw on without second thought this morning––because you didn't exactly wake up and decide I'm going to go to a fancy sushi bar for lunch today!
"Why are we here anyways?" You ask him when you're both settled in your seats and the waitress walks away after listing the chef's specials for the day.
"Oh, they have killer dragon rolls here, you have to try it," Jay tells you nonchalantly as his eyes rake the menu in front of him, blocking your view of him.
How dense can one be? Your hand snatches his menu as you stare into his unamused eyes.
"No, Jay. I mean, why are we here? It's not like anyone's around to see us put on a show anyways."
"Oh. I figured," Jay's quick to grab the menu back from out of your hands as he continues, "that we should sit down and establish how exactly we're going to deliver this performance. After all, you're stuck with me for the next three months."
Again, smacking the smirk currently resting on his face would satisfy you beyond relief. Just once.
"If I drop out halfway through, do I still get $250?" You tease, leaning back.
"Ha ha. Funny. No," he narrows his eyes at you from across the table. "It's all or nothing."
You dramatically huff to make a show just for his annoyance.
"Worth a try. But sure, let's solidify this. What's the game plan?" You sit up in your seat, leaning over the table as if the two of you were hosting a secret meeting.
"It's simple really," Jay mirrors your actions, face leaning in close to where yours is hovering over the table. "Just pretend to be deeply in love with me for three months, and try not to actually be charmed by my cunning looks."
If someone gave you five dollars for every time you've already rolled your eyes at him today, you wouldn't even need to be in this deal for the five hundred dollars.
"Wow, smooth. Can I just remind you you're the one paying a girl to be in a fake relationship with you because you're just not competent enough to find an actual girlfriend?" You lean back, arms crossing over your figure.
Jay, unfazed, laughs, tongue briefly hitting the inside of his cheek. "Touché."
Your eyes go back to the menu in front of you as a silence falls over the table. Because you're not a loaded trust fund baby who comes to fancy five-star sushi restaurants for lunch on a daily, you don't recognize half of the entree names on the menu. You spot the dragon roll Jay suggested, but seeing that a basic California roll is less expensive, your natural broke-college-student-instincts figure the California roll shall do.
"Okay, in all seriousness," Jay begins as he puts his menu down. "It's simple really. We'll just go on weekly dates and post cute pictures of each other once in a while and a little after three months, I'll just say it didn't work out. I'll give you the five hundo and boom, we move on with our lives."
It's clear Jay's put some thought into this. Safe to say he's put more effort planning this out than the amount of work he's been putting into his classes. Someone's got their priorities straight.
You're impressed to say the least––you figured Jay would just be the kind to go with the flow and wait for the situation to unfold on its own and maybe blow up into flames. But seeing as he was just as serious about winning this bet as you were with making five hundred dollars, your doubts about this entire situation were slowly withering away.
Don't get it wrong, though, you still despise him. To an extent, at least.
"And don't worry about the dates. I'll pay on your behalf, as the loving, doting boyfriend I am," Jay finishes with a wide, cheesy smile you can't help but return a growing smile back at.
"Well then, as the loving, doting girlfriend I am, I shall gift you coffee, breakfast, all that fun couple stuff, whenever you please. Or maybe unannounced, if I'm feeling nice," you figure you should pitch in as much if he's paying for all your dates. And deep down, you find the idea kinda cute. But don't tell anyone that.
"Wow, look at us. We should become Dispatch's couple of the year already!" Jay exclaims, earning himself a small giggle from you, which pleases him to say the least. He thinks that maybe when this is all over, he'll hopefully make a good friend (well, for the second time) out of it.
And you're thinking that maybe the next three months won't be as bad as you initially had thought.
As the two of you delve deep into a debate about who would be the better significant other to each other, the waitress comes over to take your orders.
And because you're laughing and Jay's brightly smiling at you from across the table, you order the dragon roll.
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The second time Jay takes you out––this time he gives you a heads up to get ready––it's at a, once again, high-class steakhouse.
The third time, you insist on the on-campus diner that's popular amongst the student population. Partially because you feel bad for the amount of money he's spent on you (even though he couldn't care less), but mostly because if you have to put on another fancy dress to just eat an overpriced meal that doesn't even fully satisfy your hunger, you might lose your mind.
And by this third time, Jake is aware of this newly blossomed relationship.
"Three dates! I didn't know you had it in you, going on three dates with the same girl!" Jake excitedly exclaims as he jumps into the empty spot on Jay's dorm bed and shoves his phone's screen into Jay's face.
The smaller screen displays Jay's most recent Instagram post: an image of you sitting behind your too-small-to-be-this-expensive-steak and smiling right into Jay's camera––a memory that brings a smile to his face:
~ ~ ~
"C'mon! We said Instagram posts would be a part of the deal! How else can we convince people we're dating?" A pout rests on Jay's face as he stares at you from across the table in the middle of the extravagantly decorated restaurant he picked out for your second date. You remember your eyes bulging out of their own sockets when you saw the "$$$$$" rating Yelp gave the place when you searched it up earlier.
"Okay, okay! One picture," you give in, already slightly annoyed that you were here instead of the comfort of your own bed, where you could be rewatching your favorite Netflix show for the third time. But because you made a deal and because you're desperate for money, you had to follow through––so here you were.
You flash an unconvincing smile to Jay's camera, which doesn't satisfy him, to say the least. "At least pretend you're somewhat enjoying this date," he frowns at you.
You sigh, until a thought crosses your mind and a smile grows on your face. "Only if you get me boba afterwards."
He narrows his eyes at you, but then meets your smile. "Sure, whatever you want. But only because I've been craving some mango milk tea lately."
"You're a fruit milk tea kind of guy? Sorry, but I might have to fake break-up with you," you tease as you take a sip of your overpriced drink to go with your overpriced meal.
Jay scoffs, feigning hurt by placing his hand over his heart. "Ouch. But before you break up with me, let me get this Instagram post in."
"Wow. Your priorities are so straight," you roll your eyes at him, eliciting a cheeky smile from him as he watches you through his held up phone screen.
"3,2,1."
"Hey, I wasn't ready! That was like mid-laugh!" You reach over the table to grab the phone, but not quick enough for him to put his phone back into his pants' pocket.
"Nope, nuh uh," he laughs as you quickly sit back down into your seat, not wanting to cause a scene in an establishment as proper as this one.
"It's fine. It's a good picture, you look cute," he casually lets out, unaware of the blush rising to the surface of your cheeks, thanks to the fact that you were suddenly interested in playing with the left-over food on your plate.
"Jay! Delete it, I'll let you take another one," you whine from your seat, imagining just how bad a candid picture of you could be.
"Ugh, fine. Ever so picky." He playfully rolls his eyes at you as he takes his phone out and opens the camera app as you prepare yourself.
"Okay, how's this?" Jay turns the phone screen to you after he takes a few snaps on his phone.
"I approve," you grin at him as he goes through the pictures himself, unaware of the smile growing on his face.
"Okay now delete the first one," you point your finger at him, narrowing your eyes at him.
"Okay, okay! Bossy," he laughs as he raises in hands in surrender.
When Jay gets home that night, he recovers the image from his Recently Deleted folder, telling himself it's for the sake of the memory.
Obviously.
~ ~ ~
"It's not that big of a deal," Jay mutters from his spot as his eyes go from the Instagram post to his Exile and Belonging in Modern Literature reading that's due tomorrow, bright yellow highlighter in hand. Typically, you'd find the reading buried deep at the bottom of his school backpack. But because Jay ran into you this morning and because he complained to you about the amount of work he's fallen behind on and because you had threatened him to do his work or else you're not going on another date––a fake date that is––with him, he figured he should at least get one reading done and annotated, despite his strong dislike for highlighters (they hurt his eyes, okay?)
What he doesn't know, however, is how your threat was completely full of bluff––but don't tell him that.
"It is so a big deal, for you at least!" Jake hops off the bed and lands on the wooden floors of Jay's dorm room so hard, Jay winces and sends a mental apology to the poor person who lives below him.
Jake suddenly gasps. "I have to meet her, Jay! As your best friend, it's practically mandatory that I meet her."
Jay opens his mouth to protest, but not before Jake interrupts him once again. "Oh! We can bring Sunghoon too, it'll be so fun! The best friends meet the girlfriend."
Jay can't think of anything worst. Jay imagines that bringing you to meet his best friends would just intimidate you out of dating him––fake dating him, that is. Obviously.
He stares at his friend in agony then back at the reading in front of him––the one Jake said he'd come over to help annotate, but the intention completely left Jake's head the second he heard about Jay's recent dating life.
"You don't have to meet her," Jay says pointedly. "Plus, you already know her."
Jake frowns at his friend's excuse. "Yeah, but that was in middle school! This is different."
Jay's hands shuffle through the reading's pages in front of him as he realizes there's no way the two of them are going to finish the assignment at this point. He supposes he'll have to save death by blindness from highlighters for another day and hope you still agree to go out with him.
Jake suddenly gasps in realization.
"Oh my gosh! Childhood best friends turned college sweethearts," Jake says so dreamily, he might as well plaster heart eyes on. Hopeless romantic, this one.
Before Jay can argue, the piercing sound of three loud knocks echo through the small room, followed with a:
"Jay, are you in? It's me!"
Jay stills at the sound of your sweet voice. He whips his head to Jake, who is also frozen in place.
But the widened-eye boy is quick to come to his senses––unfortunately quicker than Jay himself––because the next thing Jay knows, Jake's eyes are lighting up and he's running to the door, ignoring Jay's screaming whispers through this seething teeth that were somewhere along the lines of Jake––stop, I swear to god if you open that door I'm gonna fucking--
"Y/N!" Jake swings the door wide open, revealing an overly excited him and a frozen Jay half-way to the door, as if he was about to grab the very boy welcoming you in. It's as if we're living in a Sims game and the player clicked pause on this very moment.
Jake's eyes are wildly going back and forth between you and your supposed boyfriend, as if he was waiting for Jay to run over and smother you in hugs and kisses...or something couple-y like that. Jay wouldn't know.
"Uh––hi," you're awkwardly standing inside the room now, a relatively large paper brown bag resting in your palms as you look around for a surface to place it on. Jay makes his way to you without a second thought, quickly taking the bag out of your hold.
"You seemed stressed out earlier, so I figured I could bring you some food as a little pick me up. I didn't know what you liked, so I kinda just got a little of everything from the dining hall. Nothing fancy," you're rambling, but smiling so excitedly at him, Jay doesn't know what to say.
Instead, his mouth slightly drops open as he stares at you in awe, mostly because he's not used to being on the receiving end of such spontaneously generous actions––all while Jake's still excitedly looking back and forth between the two of you, as if he was expecting a marriage proposal to come next.
"Oh wow. Thank you. Really," Jay, still touched by your simple act of kindness, softly says as he places the bag on the limited amount of empty space on his desk surface––the rest of it is covered with his untouched textbooks and unfinished assignments. He wonders if you did this out of playing your role or just because you wanted to. He internally hopes it's the latter. "Seriously, you didn't have to do."
"Nah, don't worry. I wanted to," you shrug with such a genuine smile that Jay realizes he actually missed your smile.
Despite having seen you during your brief run-in this morning when you were fetching your morning coffee, Jay realizes he missed you. The two of you haven't been seeing each other recently because of your busy schedule and if Jay didn't realize it before, he's now sure he missed your company and presence around.
Weird.
"Well, you two have fun! Sunghoon needs me for something," Jake suddenly chirps from his place near the front door, halfway through with putting his shoes on already, breaking the comforting silence that fell between the two of you.
Jay frowns. "But you said you were free all da––"
"SUNGHOON IS CALLING BYE!" And before Jay can even register what's happening, Jake's out the door without another word.
"Er..sorry about him, he's...weird," Jay scratches the back of his neck as he returns to his spot on his bed, mentally setting a reminder to yell at Jake later for leaving the two of you alone. Jay doesn't know exactly why, but he's nervous at the fact that you're here in his room. It's not like you two are complete strangers––or whatever you guys were before––anymore. "Good job on your part, though. How'd you know Jake was here?"
"Oh uh, I didn't"," you let out an awkward laugh. "I just felt like doing it."
Heat rushes to Jay's cheeks and he's not sure 1) what this newfound feeling is and 2) how to respond, yet again.
Having expecting you to leave after dropping the food off, Jay's taken by surprise when you take your shoes off and come over to his bed to look at the pile of work he's spread out.
"Is this everything you have to do?" You question the stressed-out boy as you flip through the various assignments, readings, and essays he put off in the past week.
"More or less," he groans. This is no rare occurrence by any means––Jay being behind in his work––but this time, Jay realizes he may actually be in deep shit, considering he has no idea where to begin.
Right as Jay's expecting a scolding from you, he looks up to meet a look of sympathy on your face. "Well, I mean, I'm pretty much done with my day. I can try to help, I recognize some of these readings from last semester."
Jay thinks to himself that the universe has sent him an angel through the form of you.
"Really? Wow, you were't kidding when you said you'd be a good girlfriend," he sends you a surprised look.
"I'm just being nice, Jay. A concept I'm sure you're not familiar with," you remark back at him, causing his forming smile to grow into a laugh.
"I can too be nice! Need I remind you of who's paying you $500, covering all of our dates AND giving you rides to class everyday?" He remarks pointedly at you, a teasing look resting in his eyes as you're reminded of the first of many times he's come to pick you up before class:
~ ~ ~
You're late.
This never happens.
But then again, your life's been a series of unexpected occurrences lately. Such as the fact that you're currently known as Jay Park's girlfriend, for one.
You're scrambling out of bed once you take one look at your phone and realize shit, you're already late for class. Throwing on whatever articles of clothing your eyes land on first, you're already mentally groaning at the fact that you'll have to skip breakfast and run across your campus to get to said class.
Curse your professor for hosting her lecture at the furthest possible building away from your dorm. Curse the architect who decided to make your campus so large.
You're running down the steps outside of your dorm building's doors when you're abruptly stopped by a familiar sounding cough. You look up from trying to gather all your belongings together at once to meet the gaze of the source of the sound––Jay.
"Wow, you're a mess," he smirks as he gets up from the spot on his car he was leaning against to make his way over to you.
"Gee, thanks! Good morning to you too," you flash him a sarcastic smile before your default frown quickly makes it way back onto your face.
"Aren't you gonna ask me why I'm here?" He grins as he grabs hold of your backpack to sling it across his own back as the two of you walk towards his car.
"Why are you here, Jay?" you sigh, your sarcastic tone hard to miss.
"To give you a ride to class, of course!" He's beaming at you, as if he's a pre-pubescent teen who just won their first girlfriend a prize from the arcade's claw machine.
Oh. That explains the car, you figure. Deep down inside, you're relieved that you'll no longer be bursting through the lecture hall's doors as a sweaty mess––a result of having to run across campus to get to class.
Determined to not let your satisfaction completely show, you resort with a little smile directed towards Jay as he opens the passenger door for you.
The second your enter Jay's car, the strong scent of coffee hits you, and your attention is targeted at the two small cups of coffee sitting in the cupholders of the car.
"Breakfast?" Jay asks as he enters through the driver's side and reaches into the backseat to whip out a small pastry bag. A small, deliciously smelling, pastry bag.
Okay, well. You suppose you could drop the annoyed act now.
Your eyes widen with joy as you grab the bag from him and open it to reveal your favorite breakfast sandwich. He's been taking notes, you'll give him that point.
"Okay, you win. Thank you," you grace him with a soft smile before taking a bite into the glorious gift in your hands.
"Of course, I was just feeling nice," he grins at you as he starts his car. "But don't get used to it." His tone is serious, but his smile directed towards you says differently.
And the fact that he still showed up to drive you to class the next morning.
And the next.
~ ~ ~
"And need I remind you who has to date your dumb ass for the $500 in question?" Your eyes narrow at the boy who can't seem to get that damn smile off his face.
Jay sticks his tongue out at you, ending the conversation. Really Jay? What are you, five? Well, mentally––probably.
You're looking around his minuscule dorm room for a place to sit down, and Jay can't help but feel embarrassed now that you're here, in his messy single studio room that pretty much reflects how Jay treats every other responsibility of his oh so hard life: neglected.
"Uh...here, you can sit on my bed," Jay immediately offers as he moves to the side to make room for your presence––and it isn't much, considering the university only provided him a twin XL bed which is definitely not built for two grown college-aged kids.
If you told yourself a few weeks ago that you'd be shoulder to shoulder on a bed belonging to the guy you cringed at the very thought of, you wouldn't have believed yourself. You wouldn't have believed yourself if you said you were actually glad Jay let you stay instead of kicking you out after delivering the food. Huh.
Weird.
"You know, this kinda reminds me of when we were kids. I always carried us through those horrible multiplication tests in the fifth grade," you wink at him as you settle in the spot next to him, hands grabbing hold of the papers in his lap.
Jay let out a laugh, nudging your shoulder with his. "Hey! The twelve times table is hard, okay?"
You roll your eyes at him––a habit of yours he's noticed whenever the two of you are together, but more recently, he thinks it's been more out of fun than annoyance.
He wonders why.
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When Jay had first brought up the idea of bringing you as his date to his father's company dinner, you had expected a fairly fancy five-star restaurant with a formal dress code––for you've become accustomed to Jay's lifestyle. Turns out, your expectations can continue to be exceeded. Because what you had expected to be a simple dinner with a few other business men and women turned out to be an entire party, hosted in a hotel whose interior resembled something close to a castle (Or what you assume a castle looks like, as you've never personally been into a castle yourself, but this hotel is close enough).
Your eyes sparkle at the extravagant columns and diamond chandeliers hanging high above you, and Jay smiles at the expression on your face; like a little girl being brought to the amusement park for the first time ever.
"Wow, this is...wow," you mutter as you drink in the scene in front of you: people dressed in formal attire likewise to yours and Jay's, mingling and drinking what you imagine to be beverages that cost more than your entire life's worth.
Jay laughs from behind you, "Yeah the company goes a little...extra when it comes to these company dinners."
You scoff as you look up at him. "Oh really, you don't say?" You look around and you're suddenly aware of the many people surrounding the two of you and the attention you've acquired ever since entering the building.
"Jay, people are staring." You shuffle closer to him, your voice lowering down to a whisper.
"Well, it's not everyday the son of the company's CEO brings his girlfriend with him, so...looks like we'll be the talk of the party tonight. Smiles on," he winks at you, and you just know he's loving the attention the two of you are receiving right now.
"Jay Park? Is that you?" You hear a warm voice call out from behind the two of you.
The two of you turn around to meet the owner of the voice, a middle-aged woman dressed in an evening gown that matches the pattern of high-end brands you've been recognizing ever since arriving.
"Mrs. Lee! It's so nice seeing you again," Jay cheerily addresses the woman as the two of you bow in greeting.
You internally giggle at the thought of your Jay being so picture-perfect in the eyes of his father's co-workers.
"This is Y/N," he continues, his hand finding its way to your back, protectively resting it there as you go to introduce yourself. "My girlfriend."
You swear you feel goosebumps rise from where he's lightly touching you, and more so when he introduces you as his girlfriend.
You tell yourself it's just your nerves. Yes, that's it, you're just nervous. I mean, you're in a room filled with people who could easily pay off all your college loans with just a snap of their fingers, who wouldn't be nervous? Right? Right.
"Y/N! It's a pleasure to finally meet you, I've heard so much about you!" Mrs. Lee excitedly exclaims as you turn to Jay with a slightly confused look plastered on your face. He mirrors your expression as he shrugs, moving to stand behind you completely, bringing his hands to rest lowly at your hips.
His hands feel like feathers on the thin fabric of your evening gown, so light, so delicate, as if he's unsure if he's crossing a line. It leaves you wanting more, wanting to naturally lean against him and his warmth. You quick to shake the thought of your head as Mrs. Lee chirps up again.
"Jay's father is always talking about how you've been keeping Jay pleasantly busy nowadays! Good thing too, about time this poor boy settle down for someone as beautiful as you," the woman rambles on as you feel a blush creep up on your cheeks at the thought of Jay talking about you to his dad. If only they knew.
"We should probably go find our seats, I think the dinner is beginning soon," Jay says from behind you, saving the two of you from having to listen to Mrs. Lee's story of how she's known Jay ever since he was five years old and seeing him grow into this mature, loving, young man is so amazing. Oh look! I have baby pictures.
Yeah, he was more so saving himself from embarrassment.
The two of you bid your goodbyes before Jay gently uses the hand on your back to maneuver you through the crowd of socializing business moguls.
"She's not wrong, you know," you feel Jay dip his head so he's speaking near your ear, his warm breath tickling your earlobe, as the two of you make your way through the large foyer room.
"Hm?" You hum in question, turning your head up just enough to be able to make eye contact with him as he responds to your look of confusion.
"You look beautiful tonight," he says, eye contact not breaking once. You freeze in your steps.
You stare back at him in silence. Oh.
Your mind is panicking as it flips through your mental book of responses, unsure of what to say back. But because your mind is cloudy from staring at a put-together Jay in a dark navy suit to match your dress (mixed with the nervous butterflies in your stomach––have they always been there?), the only sound that's able to leave your lips is the small stutter of a:
"Huh?"
Wow Y/N, you had one job. A simple "thank you" could've sufficed! And you went with "Huh"?
You felt like a fifth grader who just learned from a friend of a friend of a friend that their crush likes them back.
"U-um. Mrs. Lee. What she said about you. You look good, really," somehow your nervousness made its way over to Jay now––his eyes flickering from yours to anywhere, anything, else in the room––the awkward tension growing tenfold each second.
Goddamnit Y/N, this is just Jay you're talking to, get a grip.
You're knocked back into reality when he slightly nudges your back to continue making your way to the main ball room, where the dinner is being held.
"Is that a compliment from the Jay Park?" Your smirk can't be seen by Jay, since he's still trailing behind you, but he can definitely hear it through your tone.
"Don't make me take it back," he chuckles, his words felt against your neck, leaving behind a tingly sensation you're not sure why you're feeling. You're glad he's behind you, so he isn't able to see the blush creeping onto your face for the second time tonight.
Jay gives a small nod to the people behind the check-in desk stationed at the entrance as the two of you waltz right into a large ball room lined with countless circular dining tables. So much for a small business dinner.
As the two of you approach one of the tables placed at the front of the room, you notice a familiar figure seated next to the seats reserved for you and Jay.
"Y/N!" Jake exclaims as he gets up from his seat to greet the both of you. "I'm so glad you made it, Jay was so excited to bring you tonight. Deadass would not stop talking about it."
Jay lets out a noise that falls somewhere between a cough and a goose being strangled, his widened eyes warning his talkative friend to just shut up. He's silently cursing the company for always seating his and Jake's family at the same table for these events.
"Aw, is that so? He's lucky he's cute or else I wouldn't have agreed," you grin, winking at your assumed boyfriend sitting next to you.
"Hey, YOU were the one excited to come! I recall a certain someone's face lighting up when I suggested we go shopping for tonight," Jay immediately retorts.
"Only because you were buying," you giggle, causing Jake to laugh as well.
"Damn, Jay. Tough," Jake jokingly adds as you laugh alongside him. The scowl sitting on Jay's face expresses the opposite of what he's feeling right now: warmth filling him up from the sound of your laughter and the image of you getting along so well with his best friend.
"I'm gonna get us some drinks, you two have fun making fun of me," Jay narrows his eyes at the two of you as he gets up from his seat. You bid him off with a smile before turning back to Jake.
"No but really though, this boy would not stop talking about you coming tonight. Then again, he doesn't really ever stop talking about you," Jake nonchalantly says, not knowing how much he was exposing his friend to you right now.
You raise an eyebrow up in response, "Oh really?"
"Seriously! I don't know what you did to him, Y/N, but this Jay I've been seeing recently is new. He complains a lot less about life nowadays, especially on the days he sees you," he leans back in his chair as his comment brings a smile to your face. Little does he know.
You stretch your neck up to find the boy in question and spot him right as he's returning to your shared table, two drinks in hand. You lock eyes with him from across the room and without a second thought, you're giving him a genuine smile that he's immediately returning.
Your heart beats faster at the view.
You wonder why.
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It's 3:07AM when you hear the first ding.
You're not 100% sure as of why you're awake at this hour on a Tuesday night––perhaps a combination of your restless thoughts and feelings not letting you sleep plus the typical stress that comes hand-in-hand with the life of a college student.
It's 3:09AM when you hear the second ding, and you brush it off, assuming it was just Heeseung spamming you with memes again––something he does often when he also can't sleep (you found this out the hard way).
It's still 3:09AM when you hear the third ding, and at 3:10AM , you finally reach over and decide to acknowledge the being who's bothering you at this godforsaken hour.
Jay [3:07AM]: Y/N
Jay [3:09AM]: hi
Jay [3:09AM]: r u awake rn
Y/N [3:10AM]: unfortunately so
Y/N [3:11AM]: why are you up
Jay [3:11AM]: come outside
Y/N [3:13AM: jay it's 3am
Jay [3:13AM]: ye and? don't tell me ur a college student with a curfew
Jay [3:14AM]: plus im alrdy waiting for u outside so u have no choice
Jay [3:15AM]: :)
You groan at your bright phone screen currently illuminating your dark dorm room.
You ponder the consequences you may have to suffer tomorrow if you stay up any later than you already have. But considering the fact that you're probably just going to stay awake lying in bed for god knows how long anyways, why not?
(And you would like to point out that this decision has nothing to do with the fact that you haven't seen Jay in a few days and that maybe a tiny, tiny, tiny, part of you may have missed his presence. Nothing.)
And since that logic is obviously valid (you really gotta work on justifying your life choices), you're suddenly grabbing a hoodie from your closet and hoping it'll be enough to keep you, who's merely in an old band t-shirt from high-school and pajama shorts, warm.
The breeze hits your skin the second you open the doors to your dorm's building, and you're met with the view of Jay's sleek, black BMW that probably costs more than your tuition. He waves at you from the driver's seat, motioning for you to get in.
"To what do I owe you the pleasure at this hour," you deadpan at him with a stone-cold voice as you enter through the passenger's side door, hoping your tone was enough to hide the fact that you're giddy at the fact he invited you out at 3AM in the morning. Like a high-school girl sneaking out of her house to meet up with her bad-boy boyfriend that her parents dislike.
The second you enter his car, you're instantly comforted by the warm air blasting through his vents and his playlist softly playing in the background. Jay's pajama pants and messy hair give you more than enough information to know that he probably just rolled out of his own bed as well. You don't know why, but your view: Jay in his oversized hoodie with his unkept hair in front of your dorm building at 3AM on a Tuesday night, gives you comfort in weird ways you can't explain even if you tried.
But it's obviously just your cloudy, 3AM mind not thinking straight. Obviously.
"When I can't sleep, I go on drives around campus. It helps clear my mind," he says, looking over at you to give you a quick smile before starting his car. "Plus, SnapMap said you were still awake, so...figured you'd wanna join."
"Oh so what, you're my stalker now? You're not driving to the woods to kill me now, are you?" You tease, an eyebrow brought up. Jay lets out a laugh from beside you as he begins to drive further into your campus.
"Guess you'll just have to wait and see," he throws you a wink before reverting his gaze back to the road, mindlessly driving to wherever the road decides to take him.
A comfortable silence falls in between the two of you as Jay continues to drive endless routes around your campus. You look over to the boy driving next to you and take in his features––you don't know what changed, but you no longer feel the same anger or annoyance bubbling within you when you're around him. You're not sure when this changed, but you figure it's just the effect of desensitization. After all, you've been spending so much time with him, you're bound to get used to it. Right?
"Why were you up?" Jay finally asks after a few minutes of just the two of you silently basking in each other's presences.
"Ah, you know. The usual. Endless thoughts running through my mind, stress from school, nothing new," you sign, giving him a soft smile followed with a shrug.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
You answer him with silence as you search your head for the answer.
"I don't know. This is kinda weird, isn't it?" You don't know why you get a sudden surge of confidence, but before you can stop yourself, you find yourself rambling on. "If you had told me a month ago that I'd be here driving around with you when it's nearly 4AM, I would've laughed in your face."
Jay doesn't know whether to laugh or scoff. "Is the idea of hanging out with me that unappealing to you?"
You give him a serious look back. "I mean, up until a month ago when you needed me for whatever this game is, you literally pretended I didn't exist."
Oh. Awkward.
You freeze at your own words, mentally screaming at yourself for letting the words leave your mouth. Why, why, why.
"Y/N..." Jay says after clearing his throat after a few seconds of silence.
"No it's fine, it was a joke," you awkwardly cough and direct your attention to anything else around you right now. The view of your campus' buildings zooming by. The clicking of Jay's blinker when he switches lanes. The quiet roaring of his car's engine. The nervous tapping of his fingers against the steering wheel.
The rest of the ride is excruciatingly silent as he exits the main road and into an empty parking lot of some administration building made out of glass that has too many floors for you to count.
You don't know why you feel your heart beating in your throat as Jay puts the car into park––why you feel uneasy. You slightly turn towards him in your seat, hoping to pick up any sign of well...anything from him.
You don't know why you feel a twinge of guilt––it's not like what you said was necessarily wrong. If you were being honest, you were slightly bothered by how the two of you seemed to silently agree not to mention your past all this time. You were always one to seek answers, to seek closure. You couldn't help but bring it up––Jay was your best friend during those years. For him to just wake up one day and pretend you were nothing to him hurt you, and you couldn't help but still wonder what in the world you did to initiate his actions.
"I'm sor–" You're interrupted with his timid voice, as if he was almost afraid to speak.
"I'm not good with people." He's nibbling on his bottom lip, fingers nervously picking at a spot on the steering wheel.
You're opening and closing your mouth, unsure how to respond. You're 100% positive you look like a fish right now. Good for you.
"I don't know why. Jake calls it commitment issues but in order to have commitment, people have to stay in my life. And people just...don't. They're all bound to leave at some point. So what's the point of putting in effort into relationships if they're just going to leave you at the end?"
You're stunned by his sudden confession, not having been prepared for such a heavy topic to arise between the two of you. Up until tonight, your interactions had always been light-hearted and easy––you guys got along well. You didn't know this is how he felt all along.
But you knew where he was coming from.
You knew what Jay had gone through as a child––his mother having left him and his dad when he was young. You remember when your parents had told you the news at the young age of 13, and you remember the pain and sorrow you felt for your then friend. All you wanted to do was go to him and comfort him, but he had already cut you out from his life by then.
"Or maybe I'm the problem. My dad barely acknowledges my existence because he thinks giving me an allowance is all the parenting I need, my friends probably only stick around because they feel bad for me, you wouldn't even be here if it weren't for the bet, and, fuck, I'm literally known as the campus' fuckboy," Jay continues, falling deeper and deeper into the hole he dug himself.
He hates this, he hates opening up and feeling vulnerable, so he doesn't know why he's doing it now. He doesn't know why he feels comfortable voicing out his fears and worries when he's around you. But he does know it's a new feeling––one he doesn't know how to deal with.
"Jay," you lace your voice with as much comfort as you can provide. None of this is his fault, you want to tell him. "I'm sorry."
"Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything," he says with a hint of bitterness and you can't tell if it's directed towards you or the topic at hand.
You're completely turned in your seat now to face him––despite the fact that he refuses to meet your gaze, afraid that looking at you is gonna bring out the most vulnerable in him. "You can talk to me. Talking about it makes it a lot easier. I'll always be here for you, as a friend."
Jay doesn't know what it is or why, but something in him snaps at the sound of a certain word falling out of your lips. Friend. Friend.
Friends don't make his heart beat nervously whenever he's around them. Friends don't keep him up at 3AM in the morning, pondering about his feelings for them. Friends don't provide him with this new, warm comfort he's become accustomed to whenever he's around you.
Deep down, Jay knows you didn't mean to add fuel to the fire. But because he's strong-headed, stubborn, and hates how vulnerable he feels next to you, he unleashes his emotions without thinking about the destruction coming along.
"It's none of your business, Y/N. Forget I said anything. You're just a toy for this stupid game and when it's all over we can go back to our own lives and forget this ever happened."
His sudden words cut deep, but they hurt him more than you. The second the words tumble out of his mouth, he's hit with the feeling of instant regret washing over him, and the lump forming in his throat restricts him from finding the right words to take them back.
The silence that falls between the two of you this time is different. It's a cold silence. A loud silence.
Jay feels his walls coming back up around him––the ones you managed to get through––and all he wants to do is apologize but he's terrified. Terrified of seeing your reaction, terrified of losing you again. For the second time.
You tell yourself he doesn't mean it. You tell yourself that he's just enduring more pain that one should ever receive.
But you also tell yourself that this wouldn't be the first time Jay leaves you in the dust.
You tell yourself that you're foolish for ever believing a friendship, or more, could come out of this act at the end. That you're so naive for feeling those stupid, stupid butterflies you've started to notice in your stomach whenever you see, or even think of, him.
"Okay," you begin with a firm tone. You're hurt, but you refuse to show it. You won't let him hurt you for a second time. Not again.
"Just...find me when you need me. As your fake girlfriend or just...me. I'm still here for you," is the last thing you say before un-clicking your seatbelt and leaving his car, beginning your walk back to your dorm hall.
Jay is unsure about many things in life. He's unsure about what he wants to do in the future, he's unsure of where he's going to settle in life, heck, he's unsure about what to have for lunch tomorrow. But he's sure about one thing.
That he's wearing his heart on his sleeve right now, and it's all because of you.
That you've become this new lifeline and he has to choose between holding onto you or drowning.
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When Jay wakes up the next morning, his first gut instinct is to get ready to pick you up for class. But today's different. Jay doesn't know where the two of you stand now, especially after last night.
Jay doesn't know how to deal with this combination of unknown emotions he's been feeling lately. They didn't come out of no where, by any means, he realizes. They've been slowly growing over the past month of seeing you so often––like a plant he's been watering overtime, not expecting it to bloom into a flower so suddenly––but he figured it was nothing more than just enjoying the company of a friend.
Until he realizes that the term friend just doesn't suite you anymore––not to him, at least. And that scares him. It scares him that you've made him genuinely smile more in this past month than he ever has in his 19 years of living. It scares him that when he's around you he can't comprehend his own thoughts, his feelings. It scares him that you make him vulnerable, that you've changed him. That you've managed to make the walls that he's spent so long building and polishing to crumble with a simple tap of your finger.
In a perfect world, Jay would have already told you all this––he would be unafraid of how you would react, unafraid of your rejection, unafraid of losing this growing relationship with you. But alas, we don't live in a perfect world. And so when Jay drives to class that day, he drives right past your dorm building.
"Where's Y/N?" is the first thing Jake questions when he enters Jay's car that morning, confused by your absence, having been used to you being in the front seat every morning when Jay goes to give Jake rides to class as well.
"I don't know," Jay mutters, unemotional eyes focused on the road in front of him, not interested in continuing a conversation that involves thinking about you.
Jake hesitates as curiosity gets the best of him. "Did you guys get into a fight or something?"
Jay's hands tighten around the steering wheel of his car. "Or something. Let's just leave it at that."
There are a few beats of silence before Jake speaks up again.
"Well, I guess this works out because I wanted to talk to you about something."
Jay continues to stare straight ahead of him, focusing on just trying to get by without mentally beating himself up at the simple thought of you.
The simple thought of you and your smile. Your witty remarks. Your stupid eye rolls. Your laughter. Your kindness. So much for not thinking about you.
"I'm calling it off," Jake's words catch Jay off guard.
"Huh? Calling what off?"
"The bet. I'm calling it off. I don't care about the textbook fees I'll have to pay next semester. Look, fight or not, you and Y/N are good for each other, everyone can see it. And I really don't want this to end up being one of those messed up teen TV shows where the girlfriend finds out the entire relationship was based off of a stupid game and then they break up and the boyfriend falls into eternal sadness and regret. And I don't wanna see you sad, dude. So yeah! Congrats," although he's admitting defeat, Jake's beaming widely, just content with the fact that his best friend has finally found happiness through the form of you. "You win."
But Jay feels like the opposite of a winner. Because even though his only intention coming into this was simply winning the bet, his life isn't as simple as it was a month ago. Because he discovered something much more valuable than some stupid textbook fees or five hundred dollars or getting his physics homework done for an entire semester.
Something he's scared he's already lost.
You.
⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺
The next time you see Jay is at the same time and place as when he first ever appeared to pick you up––at 12:17PM on a Friday afternoon, as you're exiting the doors of the lecture building home to your awfully long Capitalism in World History class. This time, however it's different.
Because this time, it's one month later, and Jay Park is no longer a forgotten side character in the story of your life. This time, you're frustrated because it's been three days since you've last heard from Jay. And because it's been three days since you've last heard from him, you can't focus on anything else, and because you can't focus on anything else, you're falling behind on every other aspect in your life. Jay's somehow managed to become the center of your life without even having to be present.
Well, up until now. Up until you go down the steps of your lecture hall's entrance and look up to be met with a figure leaning on a car you're far too familiar with. You freeze in your steps as you make eye contact with the boy you've been thinking about non-stop for the past month three days.
Your mind tells you to walk away, to just follow your flight instinct instead of fight, to just go back to your normal life. But here's the thing. Ever since Jay's made his way back to your life, it's been far from normal.
And if you're being honest, you had no interest in going back to your normal life. Normal's overrated anyways. You find your legs bringing yourself over to him, your heart leading the way.
"Hi," you simply say, planting yourself right in front of him.
"Hi."
"What are you doing here?" You already know the answer, but you want to hear him say it.
"Waiting for you," Jay doesn't hesitate in answering you. This time will be different, he tells himself.
"I can walk myself home, thanks," you state, but your actions tell differently, as you make no sign of moving from your spot in front of him.
Jay's mind contemplates telling you everything. About how he regrets that friendship-breaking decision he made that one fateful day in the eighth grade, about his true feelings, about how he first suspected these feelings when he was 11 years old and saw you in your fancy get-up for the sixth grade dance but put it off as a little crush, and about how the same feelings grew into something so, so much more in the present. But seeing that putting all these thoughts into words would involve more than one functioning brain cell (which is all he's convinced he has in the moment, for the view of you staring up at him, looking like that, has his brain short-circuiting), he settles with:
"He called it off. It's over. The bet."
"Oh."
Silence.
Okay, Jay. This is your chance. Say it.
"Is that it?" You lift an eyebrow, awaiting for more explanation. When it doesn't come, you slightly nod and start backing away. "I'll see you around then."
Is that it? Do the two of you just go back to your respective lives now? How can Jay do that, when he doesn't even recall what his life was like before you entered it––and especially when he has absolutely no interest in going back to that life?
Fuck it.
"Y/N!" He stands up straight, a newfound confidence taking over. This time will be different, he tells himself. Because now, he knows what he wants. For sure.
You turn towards him, to see him already making his way towards you, stopping in his steps when he finds himself close enough to you that he can't concentrate anymore.
"I'm sorry for ditching you in the eighth grade. I'm sorry for ignoring you since then. I'm sorry for dragging you into this stupid mess and for pushing you away and I'm sorry for calling you a toy. Because it's far from truth. I like you. A lot. And––and I'm scared. I'm scared of what this means for us, because I just keep messing things up and all I know is that I don't wanna wake up tomorrow and realize you're not in my life anymore and––"
"Woah, woah, Jay. Slow down," you look up at him, the corners of your lips threatening to curve up into a smile. "You're an idiot, you know."
Jay's never really confessed his feelings to anyone before, per say, so he doesn't really know what to expect. But he's watched enough Netflix rom-coms in this lifetime (which is still not that many) to know that hearing the words "you're an idiot" isn't what you're supposed to hear after pouring your heart and soul out. Surely not, right?
"I––I'm not sure how to respond to that," he quietly says, searching your eyes for a sign, for anything. You giggle at his sudden shyness as you grab both his arms and look at him right in the eyes.
"It's okay. I get it, if anything, I'm also scared. But you somehow got me wrapped around your stupid finger, and I hate it," you smirk at him, your hands slowly making their way up his arms to circle around his neck.
Jay's hands naturally fall at your waist as he lets out a breathe he didn't even know he was holding as he returns your smirk. "Well, I could say the same about you. And I also hate it, for your information."
"Hmm, is that so? I guess it cancels out then, right?" You smile at him as he's pulling you in so close, your head turns cloudy.
Jay grins at you, his eyes holding so much joy and endearment as they quickly flicker down to your lips before returning to your own eyes. "I guess this only means one thing then."
"Mm, and what's that?"
And before Jay can answer––and because your life's been anything but normal lately––you make the first move this time, moving your head up to close the small gap between the two of you.
His arms instinctively tighten around you as you capture his lips with your very own, and Jay swears he's about to lift off into space right now. He's on cloud nine, and he makes no plans to touch the ground ever again.
The kiss quickly becomes fervent, all the pent-up tension that the two of you had for one another finally finding its way out, all the words that were previously left unsaid finally expressing themselves. You don't even care if you're being judged by the conservative faculty members of your school right now, or by the looks of fellow students walking past the two of you.
You try your best to keep yourself from smiling as he continues to press his lips against yours, his hand moving to hold your chin, guiding your mouth with his.
Before you find yourself getting carried away, you step back to take a breath, resting your forehead against his chest as his hands rest against your back. He smiles at the sound of you giggling against him.
Jay takes a step back to take one look at you and realizes, in this moment, that change can be good. And he's willing to undergo this change. As long as it's with you.
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The next morning, you bounce down the steps of your dorm building's entrance to meet the wide, bright smile of your ex-childhood-bestfriend-turned-fake-boyfriend-turned-real-boyfriend waiting for you in front of his car, small pastry bag in hand. You smile back at him.
Jay drives you to class that day.
And everyday after that.
. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ :
✰ let me know what you think! if u made it til the end, mwah :') <3
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tenten18282 · 2 years ago
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Thank u for your Doubt comic it had me actually sobbing at 2 AM, my sleeves ended up damp from wiping my face so many times haha. OK OK but I love?? Your depiction of young Time/Mask?? Like my actual first contact with Zelda was reading the ocarina of time manga which depicted oot Link as a cheerful kid so when I stumbled upon linked universe (which I adore but still) I was just like ??? at Time's more "serious jaded veteran" characterisation bc it was so off from what I imagined him to be like haha.
Plus I just don't find his adult self as interesting as his child self but there's SO little content abt child Time, so ur little links AU really hit my soft spot (besides little time being less jaded and having a brighter outlook just makes his tragedy hit that much harder haha) AND ITS NOT JUST THAT BUT ALSO how, despite Time looking like a kid and being more cheerful, u still add all these lovely glimpses into the side of him that he keeps hidden, which has been aged and hurt and simply *changed* by his adventures, with behaviours that aren't childlike at all (how used he is to hide when he is hurt, his fear of being alone and forgotten, how intimately he understands others' grief)
Time is my fave Link if me rambling all over your asks didn't give you a clue haha, BUT ALSO! WIND!!! I adore how you completely flipped things and made wind the oldest of the kiddie Links!! Bc he's usually the baby of the chain and I just love love LOVE how you flipped it around, how it just perfectly fits him bc he's the only Link who's also an older brother in the canon text and now he can use his big brother powers on the other three
Ik u said Wind is kinda intimidated by Time, but in your comics it really feels like he has a special connection to Time bc like! Wind knows Time's legend and now is his friend, so it's like Wind is the perfect person to see both what Time has achieved and who Time is as a person if that makes sense? and as such would have more tools at his disposal when trying to understand Time and end up knowing him best—which imo Time really needs someone like that, poor bby is always caught in-between and never quite belonging anywhere
Anyways this got away from me haha tl;dr is that I love your art and your comics and your characterization and you :D thank you so much for sharing!! Have a lovely day!
AH! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR KIND WORDS!!! also its completely okay to send long-form asks like this…. I love reading opinions and thoughts… its fun and I also took screenshots of this ask for safe-keeping…. thank you….. Shockingly enough, I made this comic to be a comforting story!!! I originally did not expect so many people to be sad or touched by it in such a way, it was very surprising… I think i just have a different criteria for what i consider sad…. haha... I wish I could continue with stories like these but comics take longer for me than usual…. I've been told i should make a blog to write down my thoughts on these characters and this AU as I do have a lot of them, and I also actually really do agree with a lot of what you're saying right now! Originally, I thought of this concept as a way to bring a smaller form twist of the LU characterizations i've enjoyed a lot … which is why i say it's an off-shoot of Linked universe, as these versions of Time, Four, Wind and Rulie will become the LU heroes in the future to me… also i just want them to hang out and have fun ha
I have a lot of thoughts on what you mentioned, and would like to elaborate on what i think while also just talking about it in general, so i will put down a "read more" so as to not make it difficult for other people to scroll through this blog.
I find myself seeing the Linked Universe iteration of the hero of time to be a character who's at the end of their development… someone who's fully come to find a resolution to what they've gone through and is now somewhat at peace, especially after meeting the hero of Twilight. Child time is the initiation of this period of darkness for him; yet despite him going through so many adventures he's still very much a child- I doubt he has the tools or abilities to fully process how cruel fate has been to him. He's still an odd-ball of a kid who's still cheery…. I think that the true tumult of his life reaches his peak just when he reaches his 20's not right when he finished his adventures, so younger time is someone who i really wanted to write and draw…
Besides, I don't think he genuinely focused much on the horrors of his adventure at this current time of his life, and probably even had fun at some points. I always saw him as the kind of optimist who down-plays these horrors… Since he's always been placed in the pedestal of the hero of time, I think he's used to becoming someone who's very dependable! While he has his friends Deku scrub, Mikau and Darmani, they can only do so much for him… Which is why i do think pairing him up with these young heroes will do him well! He finally has others who truly get it… I feel like even if he's a bit cryptic over what he's seen and found in his adventures (His hero friends only seem to think he has four transformation masks…) he'll soon learn to be more at peace with it, and start unpackaging his feelings on it…
(unrelated) It also kind of translates to how I view his masks in this au. While Time has healed them of their worries and let them be at peace through the song of healing, I also believe in my eyes that time himself is one of the MAIN reasons the masks truly haven't moved on, because if you play the elegy of emptiness, there's four statues you play to, link being one of them… to the masks he's the only one left who needs to heal and Link is not allowing himself that… so they're in a state of half-consciousness where they can vaguely communicate to Time, who's the only one who can truly understand them (Much like how the happy mask salesman comprehends the masks' emotions, I just like the idea that Time picked up this empath ability from using the masks so much... I also imagine that if the others put the transformation masks on, it wouldn't work).
Time treats the masks with complete respect because to him they're his close friends, people who have seen almost as much as him, they've been through the adventure as well… they're actual tangible proof that his adventure happened, and mattered… It goes to say that having your own consistent group of companions be masks is not very healthy- which is why the masks are happy Time has found more friends. (see "random conversations" for context.)
I also noticed i put a lot of focus on the hero of Winds as of late, but that's because I feel he's quite underutilized… He's a really emotionally mature, smart kid who's also one heck of an older brother! The way i see it is that Wind being intimidated over Time is less so of fear and moreso of realizing that the person you've been equated to your entire adventure by a lot of people is standing right there. It's originally an intimitading feeling, that is later translated into intense older brother worry; Wind most likely expected this capable adult who was untouchable, but the reality of it really frustrates him… He's at a loss on how to address him, either as a respectable fighter who's very well his predecessor, or someone who's is younger than him who shoulders too many responsibilities. In the end, his older brother insctincts kick up…. but he doesn't want to disrespect Time by implying he's incapable so he's quite conflicted. He finds a middle ground eventually. To me, Wind is Time's perfect successor, I find the dynamic they both share to be really interesting. I always imagined wind to be rebellious of the legends and destinies as he's quite an oddity compared to the other heroes, so he definitely tries to help and connect with time, who in the other games somehow becomes a symbol of the legends themselves. He just wants to help Time, someone who's slowly sinking but refuses to acknowledge it.
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vazaez · 3 years ago
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Little rant bcs i feel like we should just start gatekeeping the show LMFAOO
The Audacity you must have to go to someone's post about a certain fandom just to shit over their content claiming they "ruined the show" even tho they've liked it since the first episode came out and are actually making an effort into creating fun content. Even tho u don't make a single effort into contribute to the fandom nor u are part of it ✋💀
It's kinda annoying how everyone goes "OMG u guys were my Childhood 😭❤️😭❤️❤️😭" when the kratt bros or the wild kratts account posts anything on tiktok but when ppl wanna give the show more recognition by making content or fanart, you get acused of being a poser by the "oG fAnS" that don't EVER bother about it's existence until someone big mentions the show like??? If u like the show ur happy to see more people are getting interested in it, don't u? But what happens istead? You get some dumb ass with "oh You know this band? Tell me the names of all the members, all the songs and the baterist's dog's name or ur a POSER" vibes when you're just trying to have fun and actually create fan content of something everyone else just remembers like one time in their lifes, they post the same idea of "like if this was ur Childhood" or "who remembers this show??1!2!2!" To never talk about it again. Those videos being so praised while original content only gets recognition from other ppl who are actually in the fandom makes me think that all of them only remember they liked it when it makes them feel superior from the others, kinda like when some tmnt fans from older versions feel like they're better than Rottmnt fans because Rottmnt is a "new version"(Even tho 2012 is also a reboot but that one is like the bible to these bitches), and, aparently, being a new show makes liking it an insult to the grown ass adults who claim to have liked them since the first comics and enjoy to bully minors that just wanna have fun with a show or franchise they enjoy🚶
Anyways i think i'll stick to just art bcs i got called a social reject for liking a fictional character from a kids show, someone told me i sexualized an audio that literally said "I LIKE TO RIDE THE SAUSAGE" (it was a joke omfg how are you gonna listen to that and take it 100%, seriously?? ✋😭) and even a fake queer person bcs i have my pronouns on my bio and a bi flag in my tiktok pfp and even told me to pRovE tO tHeM that i'm bi or else i'm a fake one and that i'm part of the lgbtq+ comunity just bcs it's"""trendy""" (because it seems like wanting people to call you the correct pronouns regardless of being under the trans umbrella or or not and using ur pride flag in ur pfp is a HUGE PROOF THAT YOU'RE FAKING YOUR WHOLE ORIENTATION AND IDENTITY JUST TO BE TRENDY OFC) all that when the only thing i did was posting a joke video about liking Chris 💀💀💀
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breefarrow · 4 years ago
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Hi. I have not been on twitter or even in the fandom long enough so i came here to ask you about something. What's with the song claiming thing? Suddenly ziams are claiming songs that have been claimed as larry song. No I'm not gate keeping. Pardon my word choice.I'm not English. But I'm just curious. As long as i have been in this fandom, no control was a larry song the moment it came out and everyone was ok with it and even ziams never claimed it before.now suddenly they are like oh liam also wrote it? Home has always been larry song considering the timeline, him leaking and all, ziams never claimed it before, now suddenly home is a ziam song too? 18 was taken as a larry song from the moment ed said it was written from 1D perspective and everyone was ok with it considering how Louis used to literally serenade Harry like turning his whole body,changing pronouns etc. No one had a problem untill now. Suddenly in 2020/21 ziams are claiming it. Why didn’t they do it before? Why now? I'm just curious.
Warning selfies have been a thing with Louis for years. Now suddenly it is linked with liam too? How? Did he do it before or something? I genuinely don't know. So let me know plz.
The whole devlin thing, devlin album came out in 2017 i guess and they comparing Louis tweet with zayn tweeting that is from 2016. How does that make sense?
Also some people say larry closeting didn’t work but ziam did...awful thing to say. If it didn’t work then there wouldn’t be so many antis and they are still going through so much. People wouldn’t believe Harry dates every woman that breaths around him. And they claim there are two bbg in ziam relationship right? Why did they need two bbg if it worked? I mean if the closeting worked? Bbg has nothing to do with relationships.
Idk if ziam was real or not but I'm sure gigi was pregnant, she had that symptoms, pregnancy glow,tired face and all. Now whoever the father may be..idk.
I'm not convinced about ziam and how does that make me hypocrite? Also there are some "if this counts(larry),this counts too(ziam)" thread. what's with the comparison?
Sorry about the rant.
Hello anon wow this is long a lot to unpack so I'll start with your song questions.
Idk why ziammies are suddenly trying to claim songs that have ALWAYS been larry related. Especially when Liam said in an interview that Louis and him were a song writing duo for 1D BUT that he wrote the melodies and it was Louis who wrote the song lyrics. Last I checked melodies don't equal meaning of a song so how are these songs about ziam?
Some examples of this....
They are trying to claim Home but Liam said the song was personal to Louis and how when he read the lyrics he didn't want to change them. Home is also a direct response to If I Could Fly with ONLY Harry on the credits. Home was leaked by Louis the night of Belfest when Larry found out BG was being taken pasted the birth of a kid and it pissed off Louis so he leaked Home as payback bc it was clearly a loud song management didn't want on the album.
They are trying to claim 18 but the song was written by Ed who said [compared to other 1D songs he wrote for them] he wrote 18 with a 1D member in mind. [That is why we claim the song at all.] Ed was closeted in the band to Harry next being Louis and Niall he was the least closeted to Zayn and Liam. Side note Ed has a song called Friends that he said was about 2 friends of his who fell in love and when a fan yelled L&H he laughed/smirked and said init so it makes the most sense 18 was written with Harry in mind. Plus 18 is about meeting/loving someone sense they were 18 and it was only Louis who was 18 when they all met and it was Harry who would scream NO 16 when singing the song. Also larry changed the lyrics to HIM and would stare directly at each other when singing 18 livem According to ziam MPs ziam weren't a couple until at least 2 years into the band so why would 18 make sense for them also given they were both 17 when they met & none ever went NO 17 when singing it.
They are trying to claim No Control but that song as we know is about the morning after sex and the second round they end up having. Like stated before Louis wrote the lyrics to 1D songs and Niall plus Larry always made it DAMN CLEAR what that song was about. Also remember when Harry would always jam out hard core when Louis would sing his part in No Control aka majority of the song. Yeah that song is Louis song no doubt.
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They try to claim Alive which makes no sense bc Zayn nor Liam is on the credits at all only Louis. They say it's bc Liam said he related to the song ok I see that but still he didn't write it and still how does this song equate to ziam? Alive is more a song used as proof Louis isn't straight bc it's about self exceptance of who you are even tho others around you for along time made u feel there is something wrong with you. It's about Louis who is more confident part way through the story being told and then helping his lover [who seems to be a bit insecure about themselves] except and love who they are. Since Liam didn't write on it the relationship aspect couldn't be about him and Zayn. Since he said he just relates to Alive at BEST it could mean he might not be straight but it can't be used as proof of who his partner is when he didn't write on it.
There's others but I think you get the point they have always been larry or hinting at Louis sexuality songs so I don't get why or how they are suddenly saying their ziam songs? Myself @lovemylarents and @fearlessmoon09 think bored people in quarantine is what happened to change the landscape.
To your next question warning selfies...
So warning selfies was something Louis did everytime something BG stunt related was going to happen. He started it and did it a ton back in 2016/17 when BG stunting was massive for him. Liam never had anything to do with warning selfies and Louis warning selfies were ALWAYS like I said BG related so suddenly ziammies going Liam does warning selfies for things involving Maya or Gigi makes no sense. It was ALWAYS a Louis thing.
For the Devlin thing...
You hit the nail on the coffin with that one the album with the song Cold Blooded that had the lyrics "so is it true XXXX fathered a baby? I don't really think so, if you ask me he don't like ladies. Could have been HARRY, yeah, I bet it was HARRY" [emphasis on Harry bc I saw a ziammie change the lyrics to Liam] came out in 2017 while Zayns tweet was done in 2016. Unlike Louis tweet which was specifically about this album not just the artist and tweeted during the height of BG stunting. So not the best comparison. They really should fact check before making these "larries are hypocrites" threads bc veteran larries know and fact check everything.
Next thing you mentioned what I call their slogan "larries closeting didn't work but ziams did that is why less talk about/believe in ziam then larry" piss me off so much and what you said it right. If larry's closeting didn't work then we wouldn't be here complaing about how the GP sees Harry as a queerbaiting womanizer, how solo henries who want to have sex and suck Harry's dick exist and how some locals don't want to join Louis fandom bc they think Louis and his fans are homophobic or that twarries exist thinking Louis is a deadbeat dad. Tell me again ziammies how their closeting didn't work? It is so invalidating to everything larry has been put through. Also if larry's closeting didn't work but ziams did then why did they need 2 BGs for Ziam and only one for Larry? Myself @kaybutlarry @babyhoney-28 and @onlythebravestan are still waiting on an answer to that question haven't gotten one.
As you said about Gigi yes she definitely looked more pregnant then Briana ever did. The reason I don't believe in their BG with Gigi is bc their story is inconsistenent. Side note back when Liam had a kid no one besides a few on tumblr ever said it was BG 2.0 they didn't start saying BG 2&3 until Gigi happened. Back to inconsistenences so their original story when we first learned Gigi was pregnant was it's fake just like Briana there's no kid, then when Gigi did the livesteam showing she had a bump and a round face you get when pregnant the story changed to she's pregnant the kid is just not Zayn's.
Then I recently saw some who [after the kid was born] went back to the story the kid is fake there is no kid OR they are using a child actor. Unlike Louis BG they don't have a consistent story that makes sense. Also the kids are never shown unlike with Louis kid F gets posted every damn day with creepy and bad photoshop, and a million articles about how he is Louis twin to shove it down our throats the kid is Louis. The situations have NEVER been the same with Louis vs even just Liam kid.
To your last point ziammies keep calling and making threads about how larries are hypocrites bc we don't believe what they do which is damn annoying bc they constantly say just leave us alone why do you care we exist but then constantly make threads like that getting mad we aren't all ziammies. If your going to make threads against us then yeah were going to say something and respond to your threads the way we would to a debunking larry anti thread. Their threads like that are either using funny coincidences of larry that we don't use as concrete proof to compare to ziam OR their ziam version of our proof has been debunked already like the Ziam Levine Stylinson sticker on the bears. [If you want more info on that ask @lovemylarents.]
They constantly take what is a larry proof and say it's also about ziam [Example the songs] or have a ziam proof that mirrors a larry proof. [Example the devlin thing or selfies] In their threads they always compare miniscule larry things that aren't our MAIN proof. See the miniscule proofs are the house and the big proofs are the concrete foundation that without it those miniscule things would not be able to really count as proof of larry and the larry house would fall. Ziammies ONLY have miniscule proof not a very solid foundation so I'm unsure how long their house will last.
I have been in this fandom for 10 years I have seen MANY ships come and go [Examples: Ziam, Ziall and Narry] but the one ship that has always been here was Larry. Larries have been here for 10 years, Larries are the ones who are talked about in the media, Larries are the ones constsntly gaslighted, Larry is the one ship that needs to be denied a bunch [poorly might I add] there's NEVER been any other ship or ship group people have hated, gone against or talked about this much besides Larries/Larry.
Funny [not for us] but funny that Liam goes through all the trouble of gaslighting Larries and talking about EVERY Louis stunt but he never mentioned Ziam which is a ship that actually involves him or the Ziammies who say Bear isn't his kid. Why did he talk about US and not THEM which involve him? Also funny Liam can easily say the word Ziam but Louis can't pronounce an EASY @ just bc it has the word Eroda in it.
My mutrals and I all agreed we didn't give af that ziammies existed until they kept talking shit about how we aren't ziams to and then go why are larries acting like antis hating us. First off it was NEVER larries hating on them it was toxic solo Zsquad and solo Liam stans who were. We didn't get involved until the entire tl was LARRIES ARE HATING US AND BEING HYPOCRITES. Second off and my last thought it's easy if you don't want us in your replies then don't make threads about us being hypocrites and use easily debunked ziam proof or miniscule larry proof to mirror bc we will point it out bc you think were hypocrites thank you.
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lovenona · 4 years ago
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LONG ask ahead, sorry T^T
*arrives in a hurry after 2-3 days* *slow, appreciative clap at the ted talk* sweetie, have you got any idea how much i adore hearing you ramble about the creation process??? seeing the whole love and dedication you hold for the odyssey makes my day! (and nooo, i'm totally not reading it again bc i want to have all of it in mind for tomorrow and bc it inspires me to no end hahaha what do you mean :) )
here comes yet another question: what kind of powers do you possess to write so beautifully. your writing literally punches me in the gut every single time, even the simplest of things!! it's hauntingly beautiful and i'm living for it!
(and another one) how did you find out how the odyssey was going to end?
also, it's rambling time because i've been thinking. (i do that sometimes.) each chapter title is a reference to a greek myth, and, in particular, odysseus' myth (no clue if i've written his name right, i've always knew him as "ulysse" in my mother tongue ^^;). and so my brain went: oooh nice, greek lore ^^ and then: yo wait. hold up. which brings me here: analysing the chapter titles. (bear with me please, and feel free to ignore my enthusiastic rambling/correct me if i'm wrong which i probs will)
so first, we have the prelude. david and calypso. while i'm sure david has his importance it's almost 1 am as i'm typing this so i'm going to focus on calypso. poor nymph is stuck in an island because of the will of gods for a reason i've forgotten. but here's the catch: while she cannot leave, others can come to her (good ol' odysseus for instance) until they leave her all alone again. and the cycle unfolds again and again. which brings us to a nice parallel with reader's situation at the beginnig. she, after all, is stuck on an island with no way out but stories. comes the dilf supreme toji aka an odysseus of sorts, until he leaves her. so she's alone again. calypso there illustrates a passive state of sorts. she cannot leave, or so she thinks: while she wants to, we don't see her try per se until sukuna comes in.
ah yes. sukuna’s arrival. chapter title: neptune’s hands. Neptune, god of the seas, all powerful, also known as Poseidon absolutely terrifying if provoked — which is something Odysseus did! well, man is smart enough not to do it to his face. but he did stab a cyclope, which happened to be neptune’s son. son who swore to a haughty Odysseus that he’d pay for it. in consequence: instead of going back to Ithaca without that much of trouble, Neptune goes: nope mate, and promptly sabotage his return (with a storm who leads his ship astray if my memory is correct). Neptune serves as a catalyst in here, to properly start the action. and it so happens to be sukuna’s role! he is, as well, the one who starts reader’s journey — well, odyssey in this case ;) — by making her this offer. plus, if we consider reader as being calypso, a nymph, and sukuna as being Neptune, a god, it shows their difference in power. sukuna is a fearsome curse, captain whose name is enough to strike fear in the cruellest pirate, who can and will kill reader should he get bored of her. reader is but a printer’s apprentice, so weak compared to him it hurts.
ah, yes. the narcissus pool aka siren gojo, aka me simping so hard for this man I might squirt with the mere mention of him. yes, siren gojo is that powerful, feel free to lure me in with them baby blues sweetie *blows him a kiss* hem. anyway. long story short, an oracle said: if narcissus sees his reflection, he’ll die. people prevent him from seeing himself. ofc man is so handsome it hurts and has women and men alike running after him, including a nymph named echo. he rejects her. hera is somehow involved in the mess and makes it so that he stumbles upon a river and sees himself. entranced by his beauty, he desperately tries to reach himself and stays near the river until he dies. this one is a bit trickier (especially considering I’m writing this as I go with no coherent preparation whatsoever but damn if I’m not having fun). but. *proceeds to read it again* *sighs in ‘why the hell ain’t siren!gojo real pls sir take me’* anyway. it’s never mentioned in narcissus’ myth, but I’m pretty sure he was tempted to look at himself. at least once, considering he could wonder why on earth all those people kept falling for his looks. (or he could be pretty dumb. let’s say he isn’t) so he’s tempted by his own reflection. just like reader’s tempted to follow segsy siren gojo. he doesn’t up until hera is involved and ends up seeing his reflection. he falls. not literally, but in love — with his own self. here it’s different (and the reason why i’m strugglingTM to gather coherent thoughts). gojo is the very embodiment of this temptation — so he acts as narcissus’ reflection here. he’s the one seducing reader, the one luring her until she falls in the waters, just like narcissus did. she didn’t die though, unlike him. (thank you sukuna. I guess. yes I would’ve given my life for gojo to consume me in both ways and??) now, this is very simp-tainted (sorry bout that ^^;) and the thing I’ve noticed is this: narcissus isn’t a character in the og odyssey. could it be bc to my absolute despair, gojo’s not as much of an important character as sukuna and toji? only you know!
(the hades, psyche analysis comes in tomorrow *looks @ time* *sees it's 1 AM* well, later on! have a lovely night/day!)
- the LRE (who's very happy tumblr allowed her to do paragraph breaks/to have a pirate history book recommandation! thanks about that one btw, it'll come in handy for a ff of mine (yeah it involves pirate gojo))
wait this is so precious n thoughtful oh my gosh 😭 thoughts n vibes under the cut :’) 
first of all THANK U!!!??? ur making me blush out here omg my hEART 😭 
as for ur first question, ur SO SWEET n IM LOSING IT bye i genuinely don’t know i just scream and throw a bunch of commas and metaphors everywhere and somehow things happen 💀 i read a lot (english major vibes) and it’s very helpful because i tend to imitate writers/phrases/books that inspire me while i'm figuring out how i want to write !! 
secondly: how did i figure out the ending of the odyssey??
answer: i think i just stumbled across this one 😭 i was brainstorming w my bestie (@/suedebunn) n she originally suggested a different version of the ending that i was like “oh wait” and then i played with it for awhile until i arrived at the version i have now ! i want to tell u more about how i arrived from point A to point B and what the process was but i will withhold because i am not giving anything away >:)
onto ur TITLE ANALYSIS!! this is SPECTACULAR! ur pretty much on the nose for all of them god damn i don’t have much to add :’) i’ll give u some of my takes tho!!
david and calypso – ur absolutely on the nose for the calypso aspect; david’s just a passing nod to the pirates of the caribbean portrayal of davy jones and the doomed relationship between him and calypso (mirroring the doomed relationship between toji and reader since he leaves them) 
neptune’s hands – yes! yeah! sexy! pirate sukuna is being compared to a sea god!! also a minor teaser but sukuna’s hands are important symbolically ;-) 
narcissus pool – ur brain is so big here god damn 🤲 narcissus is more of a loose reference to the idea of pride/ temptation and also hollowness/mirages (the emptiness of a reflection versus the tangibility of the real thing) so it’s not immediately a reference to the odyssey itself or even the myth (i'm taking creative liberties bye homer) but probably the best entity to use when describing gojo – the dichotomy between pride/emptiness is a lot more apparent in part 5 
gosh thank u sm for this!! excited to see what u have next!!!!!!
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scentedbirdavenue · 3 years ago
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I love more than I can manage and yes I tend to not know the features to manage something is there on most and I learn over time.... but I've paid the premium and its just not as much as I thought. But I mean I don't want to cancel services but maybe I can figure out the terminal and put in new code that would program the app to do some of the things I believe premium should already have had. ....oh I know I already give 110% due to the fact I put in the 100% the 10% is premium so of course ill do anything to make this work to the standards/expectations of my needs, wants, desires. Mostly emotionally. Half physically but mainly soul heartedly as was mentioned when I decided to buy the product and immediately purchased the premium version it had this feature where souls knew they were the same inside completely i mean like not two separate personality traits of one soul. Two bodies was the only way the body could handle soul so in the world the same soul casted on two bodies that were completely opposite in every way u can think of. Two bodies that paths of crossing were almost slim to none if their wasn't quite a few tragic moments of their lives that had no choice but to alter or they wouldn't of been able to move on. But see thats the thing..... I seem to have paid to soon bc I don't get the same effort into this version and the percentage I effortlessly give and then the times that I feel so drained emotionally due to lack of appreciation by the app developer so I put effort into making the app programs to add into the main premium and still the server seems blocked or program code is somewhere bugged and I am just worried that I won't get anything that I have put in more than I expected and I don't want to regret even being interested ever. Cuz it will take a lot of rebuild of a new app of a version of myself and most of my greatest work is in the premium app its nearly impossible well basically isn't the first original work due to having to remember the best programming methods but if I can recall the only reason they were so darn perfect is bc I gave my 110% I took in the app so close to my heart and found the missing links to the inner me. If the app crashes that part won't be there to lift me up bc its hard to figure out and its hard to be a version of yourself u wanna be and even harder when the main program the amazing app that keeps failing to understand the codes I put into it. Its gonna crash if I keep putting in the wrong languages it will never understand probably overload and eventually crash. I guess I should go ahead and prepare by taking the best parts of the program codes that linked so well with mine. And maybe I can link a version of myself that will be a soul thats not dead inside. Bc boring apps or wacky weird version of a myself app would definitely be depressing and finding someone to even download me would hardly ever be a download once used or tried for a few minutes.
So I will now get back to working on that.
While its not crashed still cherish the part that made me love it to get premium version
At the same time pull the coding from the programs created perfectly while linking into app.
Make sure that u did all possible before any mistakes are made such as emergency wipe of all data everywhere inside the app and maybe anywhere other.
Mistakes such as bad code u felt wouldn't help in ling run even tho it had interesting codes that stood out.
Make sure all spam is filtered throughout the entire premium app as well as my code for the programs too. Virus on cpu is Hella bad and that is just like tainting the app forever u can't fully ever get the virus out at some point it will be back or was never fully erased from cpu.
Pray for me guys.
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jade-doodles-questionmark · 4 years ago
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Feel free to (read: please, I beg you) talk to me/ ask me abt this au! 👀
Here's more on this au (mostly abt how the time travel work) + the content of the tags on the original post, under cut:
The big premise: modern au, Angelica has the power to go back to the past.
The two key plots are her repeatedly going back in time, the first time to risk her own life rescuing Phillip, the second time to prevent the death of Alexander
In order to successfully go back to an exact moment, she needs to be hyper focused and vividly recall & imagine it. Since the moment she realized memory was the key to her power, she started keeping journals with almost desturbingly excessive amount of details & descriptions
Only her consciousness goes back - therefore, it's impossible to meet her past self. Her past consciousness in this case is overwritten. This process is also extremely painful & she gets horrible headaches afterwards (which could potentially change the future).
even tho she can go back to the past, she only has a fixed amount of time in life. e.g. if she is gonna live for 50 yrs and she goes back in time for 10 yrs, that means in this timeline she'll only live to the age of 40. This is added to prevent the possibility of her living forever. She can't undo it either, since she can't go into the future - the moment she goes back to the past, the future timeline she comes from is erased.
Of course, if she dies it's a game over, she won't be able to "restart" in another timeline. Given the amount of mental strength its needed to use this power, she would have difficulty doing it when weak/exhausted/injured.
Ive tried *really* hard to prevent her limitlessly using this power & making it a cure-all to all problems. Another shortcoming of this power, as I've said before, is that the future timeline she comes from gets erased the moment she goes back. That means all the wonderful, happy moments that had happened in the meantime would only be in your memory and yours only. The ppl u shared the moment with wont remember it, bc it didn't happen to their timeline. Even if u can enjoy it again by taking all the same actions, a tiiiiiny difference can result in a bigger difference (e.g. a terrible headache). As in, u theoretically can't experience the same moment twice.
Some of the questions I need to answer:
How would Eliza feel abt Angelica intervening so much in her life? In the name of protection & avoiding heartbreaks, Angelica more or less takes away Eliza's autonomy in her own life
Angelica didnt know how Eliza would react either, which was why she kept it a secret from her sisters & almost everyone else. There's a version of the story where she eventually told Alexander (after drinking too much), but I'm still debating on that
how would Angelica use this power to benefit herself?
The obvious thing ppl imagine they'd do if they have ability to go back in past is to buy a winning lottery. But that would not be safe & would attract unnecessary attention. A person got the big price the first time they bought a lottery ticket? You probably won't jump to the conclusion that they know time travel, but we all agree it's a bit suspicious
as to how would angelica use it - i guess investing in stock market can be a way to make fast money. Just like the case with lottery tickets, she's careful making sure that she gains in some investment & loses in others. But bc of the fixed amount of life time thing I mentioned, she doesn't use time travel for this purpose often. She also has a well paid full time job so shes almost never that short on cash. I'm still thinking what else she'd do with it.
Frankly, I still need to add on the plot about the part of her life that doesn't revolve around the hamiltons. (And tbh, we don't get to see that in the musical either, for understandable reasons)
I might add on this in the future. I do LOVE this concept & might even write it if im able to answer these questions. Anyways, do feel free to ask/talk to me abt it lol!
Concept: “I love my sister more than anything in this life, I will choose her happiness over mine every time,” but as in a Time Travel! Angelica AU
AKA one of the au ideas/ concepts I’ve had for SO long but will probably never write
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