#tw muppet piss slavery

[the-muppet-joker]

I stare at you, talking about how I cannot speak about muppet piss slavery, I simply just chuckle to myself and take down my hood, revealing that i am infact.....

UNNAMED MUPPET PISS SLAVE.

It's my right to talk about muppet piss slavery fighting against those big companies and spreading the word of mistreatment...

Say, can you see By the dawn's early light What so proudly we hailed At the twilight's last gleaming?

Whose broad stripes and bright stars Through the perilous fight O'er the ramparts we watched Were so gallantly, yeah, streaming?

And the rockets' red glare The bombs bursting in air Gave proof through the night That our flag was still there

O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave

I kick you down to the floor like the alpha I am and shakes his head putting a cool cigarette and smoking it, "Out of all people... I thought you'd understand..." I hop on my motorcycle and drive away into the sunset in my leather jacket and cool ass sunglasses since Im a cool ass lawyer who helps muppet piss slaves out and win against those big companies.

-The one and only, Piss Anon

News flash, asshole! You cannot reclaim Muppet Piss Slavery and speak on behalf of all current or former Muppet Piss Slaves (or those who have kin memories of experiencing it). Writing fanfiction about Muppet Piss Slavery is fucking unacceptable and is irredeemable fiction. You make me sick and your fake fucking patriotism on the day after 9/11 should have you banned from Tumblr and killed by God.

[croaker-conspiracies]

Muppet Piss Slaves, The Kermit Saga.

Hello, my name is Kermit. Yes the famous B star celebrity. Well, used to. Let me give you a quick backstory. After working on films and the shows, they decided to fucking replace me with some younger new star who just so happened to look like me, throwing me in the dirt. Thankfully my abusive ex Ms. Piggy broke up with me and went with my replacement, but I was dirt broke. I ended up like the young muppet I was many years ago, holding a cardboard sign asking for money as I played my banjo hoping for some kind souls to donate. Then all of a sudden on a normal day, I blacked out. Waking up in the hellish torture that is a Muppet Piss factory. For 6 years, I fucking woke up each morning forced to piss against my will, thankfully most muppets like me don't have noses but the fumes in there was fucking unbearable, squished against my fellow muppets, sweating like hell in the heat of the room, pissing just to appease the masses for our piss, it was just like how it was when I was famous. Each fucking day in there was HELL. You all can't actually fucking say shit about it until you've actually been there, pissing away. One thankful day, Joker and his posse just so happened to accidentally break the walls, leaving me and my friends to escape, as I was running out, I met eyes with Joker, those sweet green eyes, tough on the outside but so soft and kind in the inside, it felt like forever staring into those eyes, then all of a sudden he reached out his hand. "I like something about you, I can't put my finger on it but I believe that we'll make a good match. Would you like to join me?". After hearing his words I gasped and tried to find my words blushing all over the place and unconsciously nodded and took his hand. I feel like this is the start of something good.

-Kermit, 2022

Speechless.

[croaker-conspiracies]

Daily life of a Muppet Piss Slave.

Muppet slave life is hard, each morning we wake up at 4am, I walk with my buddies to the pissing station, they constantly make us drink water as they extract our piss, this usually lasts until 7pm where we finally get to socialize and hopefully eat if you get your daily quota in quick enough, I sit down to my good friend Jaden Smith muppet, I watch him crying, "Why does our muppet piss have to taste so good?" I pat him on the back, enough muppets have muppet ptsd from collecting their muppet piss, if only someone could stop it. I sigh and reply, "Take it as a compliment." I then look at the gruel and hit it with my spoon, taking a spoonful and trying to stomach it, I keep telling myself that'd I'll get used to it soon but the scent, appearance, taste, is unbearable, they don't even bother to tell us what they put in it. Halfway through eating I see a muppet break down and security taking them into solitary, clearly they were new. I've personally never been in there but for the bad muppets they're forced to drink 8 gallons of water each day and piss non stop for a week, I sigh quietly to myself and we're all taken back to our sleep chambers, another day of pissing ahead of me. I lay down on the concrete floor with all of the other muppets around me, they also have a drain for all the muppets who piss themselves in their sleep. I shut my eyes, preparing myself for another day of pissing to meet my daily quota. - Unnamed Muppet slave, 1997-2024 Rest In Peace.

This is deeply tragic and thought provoking.

Free the Piss Slaves.

Muppet oppression must end.