#tw excessive use of tags to avoid adding things to the body of my post 😛

[darkkitty1208]

Words are the closest thing to a way I can make sense of my somewhat-of-a-self-identity-crisis-but-in-writing thing, and even then it can only express a mere fraction of whatever it is that I'm feeling. So bear with me as I try to verbalise this in an at least semi-coherent way.

I've been trying out a variety of writing styles and techniques lately. I've been discovering ways to do more of 'showing' and less of 'telling'.

I like the indirectness of it.

Actually, no -- that's not quite it. That's not it at all.

I think I like telling stories obliquely and only providing vague details not only because I'm a lazy arse who has no idea how to describe things in a direct and clear way but also because-- actually, I have no idea how to explain this in a way that isn't incomprehensible.

I can't quite explain it, but I think I like stories that can only be told in a vague way, like providing the puzzle pieces so that you get to piece things together the way you want it. The resulting picture would just be your own interpretation. I just like being subtle and merely imply the meaning of some things so anyone can interpret my stories their own way.

No, no. That doesn't make any sense either, does it?

And that's only one of the many things I'm still trying out and working on!

It's just. There's so much to try! I don't even know what I want. I've said this in my recent fic's A/N and I'll just say it again here: I'm experimenting with different things in writing the way a child would mix soap and shampoo in a bath. Which is a waste of time (and of shampoo and soap, which clearly does not apply in this scenario, but again, really cba to think of a better analogy here) but I can't help it because it's so fun.

Sometimes I think I don't even *have* a style. Sometimes I think I'll never have one. But I dunno.

Just ignore me as I try to mull this over. I'm just 'in my feels' and screaming this out into the abyss that's in the form of my silly little blog. Thank you for indulging me.

[flower-boy-roxanne]

hey!

im dirk! this is my personal intro post & it includes triggers specific to me, so PLEASE PLEASE tag your own posts with cws for my content triggs if you follow me!!! with that in mind, read the entire thing, please <3

( system dni & info located on our art blog )

about

full name is dirk roxanne strider, as a quick explanation for my url :3

i use she/they pronouns and identify as demimale! my headspace body is intersex

ABSOLUTELY NO REFERRING TO ME BY HE/HIM I WILL SCREAM

i age-slide! about 15-25

i also age-regress, typically as a response to stress and/or trauma but it can also be a result of excess affection, babying/patronizing me (which i actually dont mind much but if you do it just to make me regress we’re gonna have a problem bud), etc.

i go by dirkie when im age-regressed!! if you see me posting during those times please refer to me by that name and try to be extra nice. if i was stress-/trauma-triggered into regression i may be very emotionally sensitive. i prefer to be talked to like a little kid/baby too and i may talk very childishly (unnecessary word pluralizing, wrong verb tenses, w’s in place of l’s and r’s, easily excited, etc.)

i pet-regress into a cat mindset due to a very particular situation in the past. i will absolutely not discuss it here and im not afraid to get an aggressive/violent protector up to roast your ass if you repeatedly pester me about it. like seriously dude you dont actually wanna know anyways

NEITHER OF THESE ARE S-XUAL THINGS FOR THE LOVE OF G O D . we dont support “““s-xual””” agere because that isnt and shouldnt be a thing its fucking disgusting please let me regress without ppl thinking its s-x roleplay in peace—ITS NOT I AM IN THE LITERAL FUCKING MINDSET OF A LITERAL FUCKING CHILD. thank you <3

i have severe exotrauma. all my posts discussing it will be tagged #dirk talks trauma, feel free to block it. i also try to appropriately cw/tw tag them (i use the term tw only but its just because including both drains my spoons)

that said, dont! ask me! about! my trauma! directly! I WILL TALK ABOUT IT WHEN I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!

not only is our body autistic but i was autistic in my canon!! just a fun fact :3

i try to avoid using :) emoticons and prefer :D, :3, and the like. idk ive just had a fair share of experiences where its used in a (jokingly, usually!!) creepy/threatening context so it doesnt read well to me

please dont dm me without asking!!! ive got some of the worst anxiety & paranoia in this system, plus ive got a small bit of trauma relating to unsolicited dms

asks are always okay though :3!! so long as youre not bein a dickhead ya know? anon is off tho for comfort n trauma reasons, sorry about that

(if you want me to answer your ask privately just tell me!! i might accidentally be a fuckin idiot n post it publicly tho, just a fair warning)

i somewhat suspect myself of ocd, but i havent had the spoons to do enough research for confirmation

I AM VERY BAD AT READING TONE. please tag things /j, /lh, /s, etc. so i know you arent genuinely trying to be a dick to me

(may be added to)

my tags

#dirk.txt — regular text post

#dirk.png — art/edit post

#dirk.jpg — shitpost, memes, otherwise non-artistic images

#dirk.mp3 — original song lyrics, voice recordings

#dirk.pdf — creative writing post, infodumps, ideas

#dirk.gif / #dirk.mp4 — gifs, videos

#dirk talks trauma — discussion of my exotrauma, including vents

#dirk updates — quick notices about the blog, my personal life, or anything that may have impact on blog interaction (that of myself or other users)

#little flower — the post was made while i was age-regressed

#catnip flowers — the post was made while i was pet-regressed

(may be added to)

blacklist

(catchall cw tag is #flower boy dont look! i feel like dirk dont look might be an already used tag for some people hgsfcjj :'))

ANYTHING relevant to inc-st, p-dophilia, r-pe, ab-se, or isolation (tags: #incest, #incest mention, #pedophilia, #pedophilia mention, #rape, #rape mention, #abuse, #abuse mention, #isolation, #isolation mention)

the word “selfcest”

using he/him pronouns for me and/or implying that im a fem gender for using she/her

not exactly a trigger but i might act weird or cautious around alpha dave fictives & kins, nothing personal (technically) just trauma

making jokes about abandonment or death without joke tagging (though it still makes me VERY uncomfortable & anxious!!!)

discussion about breakups and/or exes in terms of a romantic/s-xual relationship (tags: #breakup, #breakup mention, #exes, #exes mention)

treating me like an object or subhuman, joking or not. just dont

using particularly harsh insults for me even as a joke—ie dumbfuck, wh-re, shitbag. im ok w being called a dumbass n bitch n stuff but only in a joking context!! if you want to know any other boundaries on that just shoot me an ask my dude. also dont call me slurs :(

the idea that fiction doesnt affect reality (points at myself then at my str-d-rc-st exotrauma. bitch)

i know its legit a part of my url but PLEASE dont call me roxanne unless we’re close!! it makes me uncomfy when strangers/acquaintances use my mid name for me :(

implying or stating that im guilttripping. my spirals, emotional outbursts, etc are almost always trauma responses. saying im guilttripping in itself when im actually in severe emotional distress is a trigger to my trauma with our exes. i have very little power over my spirals and often struggle in dealing with situations that are newer to me, emotionally and otherwise. i am not guilttripping, im acting on a trauma response.

if you put words into my mouth or twist what i say i guarantee you furorem will judoflip you. we have trauma with being lied about and intentionally misinterpreted too, thanks.

(may be added to)

thanks for reading!! have a fuckin fantastic day, yall