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xanasaurusrex · 4 years ago

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Light - B.M.

Pairing: Beverly Marsh x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1918 words

Warnings: Love confession, mutual pining, swimming, swearing, Richie Tozier (it’s a warning within itself), kissing, tooth-rotting fluff I stg, Losers Club are aged up to 17, super crappy ending, not proofread, I think that’s it! Please let me know if I missed anything!

Summary: The other Losers know for a fact that Bev returns Y/N’s feelings, even though she’s blind to them herself. But after a set up one day, maybe she’ll see the light.

Notes: My first ever It (2017) fic! Also my first fic on Tumblr! Thank you to anyone who read this, because it’s taking a lot of courage to write this, let alone post it…. Yeah, Bev and Richie are my favorite characters in the movies, and, given my url, I figured my first fic should be a Bev fic! Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

******

“She likes you back, Y/N,”

“No she doesn’t.”

“Stop fighting it, we all see it!”

Y/N looked at Richie with a roll of her eyes, turning back forward to avoid crashing into anyone or anything with her bike. “Can you stop with that? I don’t want you giving me false hope when I know she doesn’t like me back,”

Richie was the one to roll his eyes this time.

Everyone in the Losers Club knew that Y/N had had a crush on Bev for as long as they could all remember. Since the first day she saw Bev in the pharmacy after they found Ben outside the sewers and had gone in to find the supplies to fix him up.

Bev had been the one to save the day. She had distracted the man at the counter while they took the things they needed, and had come back afterwards to make sure that Ben was okay. Of course, Y/N had realized that it was not the time to be admiring Bev, seeing as Ben had just had a pretty rough run-in with Bowers, and Eddie was freaking out enough as it was.

It didn’t take long for Y/N to fall completely in love with the red-headed Derry resident. She lived in the apartment above hers, and whenever Bev’s dad fell asleep, Bev would climb down the fire escape and climb into Y/N’s window.

Y/N would sit with her and listen to what she said, or would just sit there, and the girls would hug.

On those nights when Bev either couldn’t go down to Y/N’s apartment, or didn’t need to, Y/N would lay down, and stare up at the ceiling, knowing that Bev’s room was directly above her own. She would wonder what Bev was doing, if she was reading the secret admirer note that Ben had given her, or if she was thinking of Y/N just as much as she was thinking of Bev.

It was torture.

It took a little longer for the other members of the Losers Club to realize that Y/N was falling in love with Bev. After that, they all began encouraging her to confess to Bev, because even though at the time they hadn’t seen the light that ignited in Bev’s eyes the second they landed on Y/N, they wanted their friends to be happy, and who else to be happy with but each other?

That was all when they were twelve, nearly five years ago. In that time, they had all seen that Bev loved Y/N the same way Y/N loved Bev. It was hard to watch the two beat around the bush with each other; subtle flirting that neither one noticed (though everyone else did), and even harder to see them think that the other was in love with other people, though everyone else thought it was painfully obvious to everyone else that it was each other they were in love with.

Now, as Y/N and Richie biked home together, Richie tried his best to convince Y/N for the thousandth time that Bev liked her back, no, loved her back.

“I’m sorry Rich, I want to believe you, I really do,” Y/N said for the thousandth time. “But you’ve gotta be blind to not see that Bev and Bill are in love with each other,”

Richie quickly realized that he didn’t have enough energy to argue with her today, even though he still wanted to, instead opting for a safer topic: the test that Mr. Herrd gave them today, that Richie was fairly sure he had failed.

***

“They’re both fuckin idiots,”

Everyone nodded in agreement at Richie’s statement as the entire Losers Club watched Y/N and Bev play around and splash each other in the lake in the quarry, both of them giggling like little girls, their cheeks bright pink, and not from the sun.

“Bev!” Y/N squealed as Bev splashed her with a particularly large amount of water. After taking a second to regain herself, she retaliated by splashing an even larger amount of water at Bev.

“It’s like they’re both wearing signs saying, ‘I’m in love with the person standing in front of me, but since I’m both a pussy and an idiot, I haven’t said anything yet,”

Stan rolled his eyes at Richie’s language, but agreed nonetheless. “I wish they would just admit it to each other already. To be honest, it’s getting tiring. Should we just… lock them in a room together and not let them leave until they confess?”

“That’s an idea,” Bill smiled.

“Maybe we should say we’re meeting at the Quarry but then none of us show up,” Eddie suggested. “Chances are they’re gonna stay and hang out, and maybe if we’re lucky they’ll say something?”

Richie scoffed. “Knowing them, fat chance. I think if this plan fails, we should go with Stan’s idea,”

The others all agreed, and decided when the best date would be to set this up, and then set the date for their backup plan, and decided they would do it at Bill’s house, since his is the biggest and they would be able to hang around and check in on them regularly without having to hear them kick and scream.

“You guys coming back?” Y/N broke the boys out of their trance after her and Bev realized that they had been splashing each other for nearly fifteen minutes, when they should have been splashing the boys. “We’re getting bored!”

The boys all gave each other a sly look before immediately running back towards the water, splashing Bev and Y/N immediately, all of them laughing as they got splashed back.

***

“Are they coming?”

Bev and Y/N had been at the Quarry for nearly half an hour, both of them laying against the rocks, sunbathing, in just their bikinis. It took everything in both of them not to stare at the other and admire everything about them.

Y/N glanced at the watch that she had taken off her wrist, anticipating that they’d be swimming, and saw that it was now forty five minutes after noon, the time all the Losers had agreed to be at the Quarry.

Y/N sighed. “I don’t think so. Maybe they all forgot?”

Bev laughed. “You think Stan forgot? He’s probably at Richie’s with the others trying to get Richie out of bed. How much d’you wanna bet he stayed up all night on his Gameboy again, and now he’s sleeping the day away?”

She said the last part in a mock-dreamy way, a tone of voice that had Y/N’s heart soaring. She had always loved the sound of Bev’s voice, and there were certain times when it would just go straight to tug on Y/N’s heartstrings. It was never a particular time, just… Bev.

Everything about Bev was magical to Y/N. Somehow, all it took was one small smile, one of Bev’s smiles, and all of a sudden, Y/N was a completely different person.

Normally, she didn’t really like physical contact. It wasn’t anything in particular that had caused it, she just never was a really cuddly person. She could enjoy a short hug, or a quick high five, but anything longer than about three seconds made her uncomfortable

She wasn’t that way with Bev. Y/N would hug her for eternity, and would never want to stop. The two often held hands, and told everyone else that it was purely platonic, though Y/N secretly wished that it would be something more.

Y/N knew that Bev was still talking, but she couldn’t focus on anything more than the way that Bev’s lips were moving, as they moved quickly and perfectly to form the words that were on Bev’s brain.

The conscious, realistic part of Y/N’s brain told her that she should be focusing on what her friend was actually saying. That in just a few seconds, Bev was going to do the thing that they always did in movies where she waved her hand in front of Y/N’s face and asked if she had heard anything she said.

Sure enough, she did.

“Y/N/N, are you even listening to me?” Bev asked with a small chuckle.

The sound alone sent more heat to Y/N’s cheeks.

“S-sorry,” Y/N said quickly, shaking her head, almost as if that would clear her head of the thoughts she shouldn’t be having about her best friend. “Just uh… feeling a little out of it today, that’s all,”

Bev nodded in understanding. “Yeah. Today just… feels weird.”

Y/N nodded in agreement.

The two stayed silent for a few more minutes, before Y/N sat up again. “So, since the boys aren’t coming, we probably shouldn’t wait for them to start swimming, right?”

Bev nodded in agreement, before jumping up and running towards the water, yelling, “Last one in the water is a dancing clown!” behind her, before immediately splashing into the water, getting to a deep enough area, and diving in.

Y/N cursed herself, and then immediately launched herself into the water after Bev, inadvertently splashing her with water as she came out of the water herself at the perfect time.

“Got you!”

***

Y/N shook the water droplets out of her hair, refraining from watching as Bev dried out her own hair, slipping the loose dress that she had brought with her over the bikini that she had worn.

It was now five forty five, and Y/N was going to be expected home for dinner soon. After realizing this, she had reluctantly told Bev that she needed to head home.

Since they lived in the same apartment complex, Bev said she’d go with her.

The sunlight from the sunset bounced off the lake and onto the two girls standing on the beach next to the lake in the Quarry.

Y/N couldn’t help herself this time. She looked up to Bev, and found that she was staring at her the same way, admiring how the golden light danced across her skin, from the top of her coppery red curls to the very bottom of her feet.

Before she could even process what she was doing, Y/N quickly closed the space between her and Bev, pressing her lips against Bev’s.

It only took Bev two seconds to kiss back, relieved that Y/N had been the one to make the first move.

After a few seconds, they realized that they needed air, so the two reluctantly pulled apart, resting their foreheads together.

“Do you have any idea how long I’ve wanted to do that?” Y/N whispered breathlessly.

“It was love at first sight, wasn’t it?” Bev asked. “I saw you with the boys and I knew that it was always going to be you. It’s always been you, Y/N,”

“It’s always been you, Bev,”

The two pulled apart, Bev’s arms still wrapped around Y/N’s neck, Y/N’s hands placed lovingly on Bev’s waist. As she looked into Bev’s eyes, she saw a glint in her eyes that she hadn’t seen before.

The light made Bev’s eyes even brighter than they already were, and the longer Y/N looked at her, the more she fell in love.

“I love you, Bev,” she confessed quietly, feeling like a weight had been lifted off her shoulder at the confession. “I always have.

#beverly marsh #beverly marsh x reader #bev marsh x reader #bev marsh #it 2017 #it chapter one #it fanfiction #losers club #richie tozier x platonic reader #not proofread #bad ending #x reader #beverly marsh x yn #bev marsh x yn #beverly marsh x y/n #bev marsh x y/n #x yn #x y/n

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tiny-crecher · 5 years ago

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Unus Annus Secrets

Here I’m going to try and explain all of the Unus Annus codes + possible lore. If I have forgotten some information or if one of these links doesnt work/is incorrect please let me know. This post will be updated when needed.

This is LONG, so be prepared.

At first, these codes were only in videos edited by NerdFiction, but as of October 26th this is no longer true. (The possible exception to this would be the first video I’ve listed, as the editor is not in the description).

1) 5 Weird Apps That Predicted Our Death

“Here at Unus Annus the end is nigh... when the timer hits zero we will cease to exist. is it fate? is this a simulation? Can anybody hear me? My name is.... [FILE REDACTED]”. Timestamp - 0:14

2) Ethan Roasts Mark for 15 Minutes Straight

“and in the comments, you will read the words you soon will see are wise controlling pawns who type our deed ‘That is Discord, not FaceTime’” Timestamp - 0:40

“within this truth a question stands, is the pee sauna ever close?”. [“Pee Sauna”was uploaded about a week afterwards] Timestamp - 0:40

3) Our Fans Try to Scare Us with Their Homemade Creepypasta

“What will happen if the clock stops”

“Could I find a way to keep it going?”

“If neither hand is right, what deals are left?”

“Who is the master of the clock?” (all around 8:44)

4) Learning to Cry on Command to Increase Our Youtube Views

“remember the key, the incompletion of a logolept’s corrective action” [a logolept is “a person who takes a keen interest in words”. Marcus is likely referring to himself.] Timestamp - 1:49

“the long wait ends with twenty four more for a path of destiny chosen before”[“Pee Sauna” was uploaded the day after] (closely after the last code)

5) Becoming One With the Horse

“They heard me, I knew it could work!” (timestamp currently unknown; to be updated)

Around this time, NerdFiction’s Twitter bio said, among his normal information, that he was “trying to stop the Unus Annus clock from within.”

6) Preparing a 5-Star Meal for Our Youtube Famous Dogs

“I couldn’t stop it. Will I die with the machine?” (Timestamp - 21:33)

7) Does This Magnetic Skincare Routine Really Work?

“freed or so I thought. Another layer, but still the clock.” (Timestamp - 9:45)

“The Beginning of The End”.

On July 26th, at 12pm PST, a video was uploaded to Unus Annus titled “Traversing the Desert to Find Our Inner Truth”. This video was only up for a few minutes before it mysteriously disappeared, only to be replaced by another video, titled “The Beginning of The End”. At first glance, the videos were identical, save for different titles and slightly different descriptions. However, the second video was slightly longer than the first, and upon further inspection, many came to realize that the audio was slightly different as well. You can listen to both audios here. There was a rumor going around that the captions of “Traversing the Desert to Find Our Inner Truth” said something about looking out for Norbert Moses, but no one has been able to confirm this to my knowledge.

8) Puberty Simulator

“Happy birthday to the beast or to the body that once housed me. A transfer made for pity’s sake. Tricked into the machine as he had my cake.” (Timestamp - 14:36) [The same code was found a week earlier in “Mark and Ethan Shave Chica”, uploaded on NerdFiction’s birthday. The original code was very difficult to make out, so it is likely he inserted it into a different video to make it easier for us.]

On the same day, NerdFiction’s Twitter bio read “Everyone must leave something behind when he dies. Memento Memoriae” (remember memory)

In “The Koala Challenge: TikTok’s Intimate Couple’s Trend” one of the clips is edited to look like a TikTok video, with the user ron_somberest being used. Ron_Somberest is an anagram for Norbert Moses. This TikTok account does actually exist, and the icon is a zoomed in and brightened photo of Norbert Moses’s face with the eyes scribbled out.

Around this time NerdFiction’s Twitter bio read “’It’s not dark, never was’ - Ron Bestsmore”. Ron Bestsmore is also an anagram for Norbert Moses. It is possible that the “dark” being referred to here is Darkiplier, and NerdFiction is trying to imply that Dark is not involved in this.

About a week after the koala challenge video was “How to Start a Fire (except don’t)”, which featured an appearance from Unus. NerdFiction’s Twitter bio read “In the end, who is your savior and what are they saving you from?”

Things were quiet for about a month. NerdFiction eventually erased the cryptic message from his Twitter bio.

9) Learning To Use The Force

“wait no something is wrong. he knows!” (Timestamp - 10:45) [translated from small coded words hidden in the montage]

“STOPTHISWHATAREYOUDOINGO3″ (Timestamp - 11:40)

“it worked” (a spectrogram, derived from a sound played at the end of the video)

10) Momiplier Tells Us True Scary Stories from Korea

“As I was, as I’ve done to him now. Am I right to decide his fate?” (Timestamp - 5:44) [Right before this, Mark’s mom is talking about a nightmare she had where she was paralyzed, possibly implying that nerdfiction was once paralyzed and has now paralyzed someone else (pointed out by @/minervas-sandwich)]

11) Cryptid Olympics

“I thought you’d join us but, hey, that was just a theory, Memento Doctrina” (remember learning). (Timestamp - 5:49) [The code references the Game Theorists channel, which had uploaded a video about Unus Annus earlier that same day.]

- From here on, every video has had some sort of code -

12) Edward Pumpkin Hands - This was the first coded video not edited by NerdFiction, instead being edited by Diceroll.

At various points throughout the video small parts of a url are seen. When pieced together, this link is made: https://imgur.com/a/tyDewJ7. It leads to a photo of the Unus Annus hourglass. When edited, a series of binary text is shown, which translates to “zhIaNL2“. Inputting this into another imgur link gets you to https://imgur.com/a/zhIaNL2. After editing the photo (although you can still sorta see it without doing so), a cipher of a custom alphabet is shown (I posted an edited photo here).

At 5:01 in the video a weird image is shown for only a moment (a slightly brightened version of it here). Nobody knows what the hell it means.

At the same time, there is a reversed audio of someone (presumably Ethan; it sounds like him) saying “we did that”. For context, the sentence said right before that line was “if one of us dies, the other has to take over for the remainder of time”. This is possibly implying that someone, or multiple someones, has/have died and been replaced.

13) Blood Bath - edited by rad_r

“Everything’s fine”

The Unus Annus timer is shown. It counts down for three seconds before counting up for one second. Heavy breathing can be heard over it. It is then cancelled by an error message

“ITS NOT FINE HELP” (this and the previous two messages are hidden at 5:57)

“you’ve done it now.. a machine observed. there is no returning.. a machine unnerved. there is only.. a machine unconqured.” (right at the end of the video, before the timer)

14) The Unus Annus Annual Costume Contest - edited by nerdfiction

“I saw just one door in a hall filled with many, I locked your gate but they were too late to join me. He was re-placed, she was undone, I had escaped yet he had still won”. (Timestamp - 2:05) [possibly talking about diceroll and rad_r. The pronouns would line up, and it would make sense with those two now having edited coded videos.]

15) Ethan Turns Mark Into a Werewolf - edited by rad_r

“futility or farewell? only time time time.” (timestamp - 7:17)

16) Ethan Kidnapped Mark - edited by Diceroll

Two spectrograms are shown in this video; one at 14:08 and one at 17:38. Combined, they create an imgur link: https://imgur.com/a/gKB62sv

The imgur link shows a photo of a key. On the key is a code translating to “stop the clock”

At the end of the video before the timer is a set of text in the custom alphabet previously mentioned. Translated and decoded it translates to “I can hear it coming theres not much time left the ones that tried to stop it have had their hearts cleft it is now your turn to put this loop to rest take us out of here and show us a new nest”

17) Being Brutally Honest with Each Other

“It is alive, no longer living / misunderstood beats unforgiving / escaped that fate but lost the tale / does a hope yet remain or just one final nail?” (Timestamp - 26:03)

18) Recreating Every Single Unus Annus Video

“The bottom of the spiral” (timestamp - 10:55)

19) “All Our Video Ideas That Never Happened”

“Be careful for what you wish for” (taken from two different codes)

*20) The Unus Annus Last Supper + Who’s Cutting Onions In Here??? - both edited by rad_r

“We’ve asked... we’ve tried... is there no way to stop the end? To those who aren’t deterred: how much will you sacrifice to ascend?” (A quotefall puzzle, split into 2 parts)

21) Everything’s Legal If You’re Dead

Norbert Moses is mentioned at 10:50. Look closely, his name is only there for a couple frames.

These have been the only codes I’m aware of as of 11/11/20.

(be sure to check out @gemstone6’s list as well!!)

Link to my Unus Annus theory

#unus annus #UA codes #crankgameplays #markiplier

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yoonjinkooked · 4 years ago

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Chemistry | JHS (6 (pt 1))

Part 6 - Just Do It

(pls ignore my old URL, i’m too lazy to change it now RIP)

DRABBLE SERIES, TONS OF SHORT LITTLE CHAPTERS.

SERIES MASTERLIST

Pairing: Hoseok / Reader

Rating: 18+

Genre: FWB, university AU, smut

Warnings: blonde Hobi (yes, that’s a dang warning), heaps of dirty talk, public groping, lots of sex discussion, them being responsible adults and getting tested before doing it, cursing, drinking. It ends on a bit of a cliff hanger cause this is just an intro of the smut fest that the next chapter will be Also, IMPORTANT: the ‘Spring Cleaning’ party that I am describing is fictional (that I know of at least) and I BEG OF YOU, please don’t mix your drinks. Just don’t. It won’t end well. Don’t mix drinks, don’t drink and drive, don’t drink what a random person gives you and never ever ever leave sight of your glass. Please. Drink responsibly and stay the f away from it if you are underaged. That also means you need to stay the f away from this story, too 💜

Word Count: 3k

Summary: After a few years of being immune to Jung Hoseok’s charms, you suddenly fall into them, head first. All it takes is one night, too much alcohol and a lot of balls.

A/N: Again, DRINK RESPONSIBLY! The smut fest part 2 is coming super fast (no pun intended). Unedited, so please forgive me, I needed to get this shit out to you and i just need more Hobi. these are drabbles after all lol

“I’m clean,” Hoseok informs you with the widest grin possible. “Got the results emailed this morning. 100% clean and ready.”

You don’t register his words at all - first of all, he had startled you, appearing directly in front of your path, probably seeing you from afar, making your way to the study hall where the first class of your day takes place. And on top of that, you are way too shocked with his appearance to even bother understanding the words he was telling you.

“You’re… you’re blonde,” you mumble as you stare at his hair, wondering if it’s your mind playing tricks on you. Sunlight makes hair lighter, doesn’t it? It doesn’t make it almost platinum, though. Looking him over, you realize that nothing else has changed - still the same height, still the same weight, still his signature casual but colorful clothing - but the blonde is there and it’s magnetic - it’s impossible to look at anything else before your eyes are glued to his new hairstyle again. It suits him so damn well. If someone had told you he’d look this good blonde, you wouldn’t have believed them.

“Oh, yeah,” he waves his hand off, laughing, as if it’s a completely irrelevant thing. Honestly, to him it might be, but not to you. “More importantly, I am clean,” he repeats his earlier words and this time around, you do get to properly register them, as well as the meaning behind them. Clean. Safe to have sex. No worries in that department. You should be overjoyed but not only are you still hypnotized by his sudden change of looks, you’re also refusing to focus on that particular information.

It’s weird - you did stuff, discussed even more, agreed on everything. You blushing at him informing you that it’s finally safe for him to fuck you and finish inside you is weird.

“You’re blonde,” is all you can say, and it earns you an eye roll from Hoseok.

“Oh come on Y/N,” he whines. “If you’re going to be like this just take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

“Hey!” you snap, smacking him on the shoulder in retaliation, which only makes him laugh. “Have mercy on me here, give me a moment to get used to this new look of yours. If I showed up with a completely different hair color, would you be able to focus on anything else?” you demand, absolutely positive that he’d be equally as lost as you are.

“If you telling me that you’re clean and we can finally fuck, yeah, I wouldn’t be focusing on hair, even if it had all the colors of the rainbow in it,” he answers honestly.

“Okay, okay, we get it, we’re on the same page - you’re stupidly hot, clean and want to fuck,” you laugh at him, although you would be a fool to deny that it’s getting to you - the way he is so upfront about liking you and being attracted to you is impossible to ignore - it makes you feel a lot more confident than you have felt in a long while.

“Oh Y/N, you know me so well,” he acts as if he’s genuinely touched and it’s this reaction that makes you melt and laugh. No matter the hair color, no matter how casual he references his intention to get his dick inside you, it’s Hoseok. And that’s all that matters. “Seriously though, we both have our results so whenever you’re ready, if you’re still up for it…” he doesn’t finish the sentence but the raise of his eyebrow says it all.

“I’m not missing out on that piece of ass if that’s what concerns you,” you joke, looking him up and down as you speak. It’ll never cease to amaze you how he can whisper the dirtiest things to you, or even say them casually out loud, but turn as red as a tomato when you do the same thing. “What are you doing tonight, do you have any plans?” you ask.

“Aren’t you going to Namjoon’s?” he frowns in confusion. “Spring Cleaning party season?” he reminds you and starts laughing immediately, probably at your look of realization mixed in with disgust. “Is this about Namjoon or about the Spring Cleaning party season?” he laughs.

What you guys refer to as spring cleaning is exactly what it sounds like - all the leftover alcohol that somehow managed to survive the past year is gathered in one place in the ‘bring-your-own-booze’ manner. It’s usually a mixture of hideous drinks and half empty bottles and once it’s all gathered, you make it even worse, combining it into borderline poisonous mixtures. Everyone attending and everyone drinking does so on their own responsibility, fully aware of how the night might end.

A year ago, it was still fun. Now, you know you’re too old for that shit.

“It’s about both,” you answer Hobi’s question in a whine. “I don’t wanna deal with wasted frat boys who’ll spend half the night throwing up and Namjoon is insufferable.”

“Namjoon is one of your best friends,” Hobi laughs.

“I know - that’s why I’m well aware of how insufferable he is,” you grunt in annoyance. “I know it’s tradition and all but can we skip all of that? Coochie in exchange for avoiding a party we’re too old for anyways?” you suggest.

“Wait,” Hoseok’s eyes widen and you can imagine a lightbulb turning on above his head. “You think Namjoon’s insufferable?”

“Incredibly so, yes.”

“And you want to make his life a living hell in retaliation?” he continues asking.

“Absolutely,” you reply in a heartbeat, despite loving Namjoon like he was your family. You adore him but you cannot stand him at times and ever since this little thing with Hoseok had started, he had not stopped teasing you. It’s time for him to suffer.

“Hear me out,” Hoseok moves closer to you, as if he is about to share a conspiracy theory that no one except you is allowed to know about. “How about we go to the party and stay there a bit - laugh at the idiots, dance to bad music - just a regular Thursday. And then, when the shitshow starts, and it will start, we go upstairs and seal the deal?”

“You want us to fuck in Namjoon’s house?” you start laughing.

“Is there anything that would annoy and traumatize him more than knowing two of his closest friends fucked in his house?” he points out.

“Yeah, if he walks in,” you burst out laughing. “Honestly, sold. Fuck it.”

“I plan to,” he wiggles his eyebrows at you in the most sleazy manner possible - jokingly, of course. He knows he has you hooked and he can play around with it. And you’ll love it.

“Ugh, stop doing that,” you laugh, smacking him on the shoulder again. “Don't try too hard, you already have me, blondie.”

“I look that good, huh?” he laughs, hitting the bullseye.

You don’t answer that question - you offer him nothing more than a smile and a shrug before you slowly walk past him and make your way to a class you’re probably already late for. He knows you enough to realize that to you, yes, he does look that good. And you cannot wait to find out what other things he can do to you, hoping that the movie is as promising as the trailer was.

Standing across the room, Hoseok keeps his eyes glued to you, the same way he did from the moment you entered the house. You aren’t hiding from it either - you make direct eye contact with him, smiling in a knowing manner as you listen to whatever it is that Taehyung was yapping on about. You tried to listen - you really did, at first. But the problem is that Hoseok’s very presence demands your attention - it’s something you can’t control. If he’s around, if he’s in the room and if you have this feeling of the two of you alone knowing something, knowing this secret about what’s going to happen tonight - no one else stands a chance, not even your friends.

“Are you seriously ogling Hoseok while I’m asking you for relationship advice?” Taehyung sounds exasperated and you feel guilty - even more so when you realize that the only reason he did manage to get your attention was because he had mentioned his name.

“Ugh, I’m so sorry Tae,” you don’t try to defend yourself, knowing you’re guilty as charged. “My mind is a mess, I’m a useless friend. I just… can’t focus on anything else,” you admit sheepishly, not really wanting to go into details. They know that something is happening and that’s it. You don’t want to share more, neither does Hoseok, nor do you think any of your friends is particularly thirsty for details. Except perhaps Jimin, but tough luck for him.

“Then go!” Tae urges you and for a moment, you think that he is angry at you - the urgency with which he said it makes you wonder if he’s pissed with you for not listening to him carefully - but when you look up at him, you see his signature smile. He’s not angry - he’s cheering you on. “Go and get your guy!”

You want to sigh, roll your eyes and remind him that Hoseok is not your guy - but in a weird, fucked up way that only you and him understand, he kind of is. It’s you he’s looking at - not any other girl, and there are plenty. It’s you he’s had his eyes on ever since he first saw you - it’s you he’s waiting for.

So you go for it - the same way you did the night it all started. Without thinking twice about it, you approach him, walking through a crowd of people to get to him - his eyes follow you every step of the way, standing straighter as you finally get to him, mere inches separating the two of you.

It’s electric. The feeling between the two of you, it’s purely electric, making you wonder if he’d burn to the touch if you were to reach out. In your mind, he always was the epitome of the Sun, so it wouldn’t be no surprise. You notice his smile despite not breaking eye contact - he smiles at you with them too, the signature wrinkles appearing on the edges.

“Well, don’t you look lovely tonight,” he tells you, giving you a quick once over. “Black has always suited you.”

“Now’s the time when I say something quirky yet charming like, ‘it matches my soul’,” you joke, laughing along with him. “Thank you - I had to dress in my finest, seeing as it’s a special occasion after all.”

“Is it?” he laughs. “I thought it was just a Spring Cleaning party.”

“Hoseok…” you shoot him a warning glare.

“I’m just messing with you,” he laughs, pointing out the obvious. “Can I… kiss you?”

This question takes you by surprise - you have decided to be public with whatever the hell this thing is - simply to avoid confusion, especially since you’ve agreed that you won’t be sleeping with other people while this deal of yours is standing. It’s a nice surprise, though - the fact that he still wants to ask, the fact that he is making sure that you are comfortable with it - whether it’s with the kiss itself or it being in public. It warms your heart to know that even though you had never planned any of this with him, he ended up being the right choice.

“Hobi, honestly, we’re past the point where you need to ask,” you admit, wanting him to know that you’re not going to back out and that you do feel comfortable.

He says nothing, instead deciding to kiss you immediately. It’s slow and gentle, lazy and languid, in a way that shows no rush or urgency. It’s obvious that he is enjoying it, and so are you, every move of his tongue against yours, every breath of yours that mingles with his. To the two of you, the rest of the room no longer exists - the sounds toned out, the people long forgotten. It’s almost as if it’s you and you alone - and the rest of the world doesn’t matter. You move your body closer to his, anchoring your hands around his neck as you press against his front - as you have found out, making out with Hoseok has plenty of merits, and one of the bigger ones is simply the feel of his body against yours.

His hands wander, slowly and likely aware of the audience around you - it’s highly unlikely that anyone spared you more than a glance, but despite what it feels like in your mind, you are definitely not alone. So when his fingers graze your ass, he doesn’t grab it firmly like you know he’d like to - he simply rests his hand there, with pressure that promises that there’s more in his mind than a simple touch. You know very well that if the two of you don’t slow down soon, he’ll pop a boner in the middle of Namjoon’s kitchen and even though you’re hardly keeping this a secret, that would likely be a bit too much for him to handle.

With your mind heading in that direction, you begrudgingly stop the kiss, but you don’t move too far away from him - your hands still around his neck and his hands still on your ass. For what seems like minutes, neither of you says a word, simply looking at each other, your eyes scanning the face of the other - the way his lips are wet and how he nervously licks at them, the way his cheeks also changed shades (and you know alcohol is not to blame for it) and the glint in his eye that likely mirrors yours, with both of you knowing what’s in the other one’s head. Tonight is the night, the night you will finally seal the deal.

And if all goes well, start something that will make you explore things and areas you dared not speak of, much less try them before. All of it, from the sweetest and most romantic to the nastiest, kinkiest shit imaginable - you want to do it all with him and it’ll start tonight.

“So...” You start, in what you hope is a sexy voice. “Are we going to go and piss Joon off by fucking in his house?” you ask, making sure that the sexy voice you’re trying to use is also low enough for no one else but him to hear. You take it a step further, pressing your lips to his ear, whispering. “I want to suck you off before I ride you until I can no longer hold myself up. Then, I want you to fuck into me with all that strength you have and fill me up, watch the cum drip out of me and then watch me finger it back inside my cunt.”

Pulling away just in time to see him swallow a lump, you move one of your hands from around his neck, down his chest and stomach, very slowly, before grazing it over his already noticeable growing dick - you don’t tease him more than that, knowing that even though you might not feel them, you likely do have eyes on you by now - you simple careers the area where his jeans are starting to stand out, a sign of his eagerness that completely mirrors the way your underwear is sticking to your core. Both of you are horny as all hell and if you don’t act on it soon, you’ll jump his bones right here, right now, on Joon’s kitchen sink.

“How ‘bout I use my fingers to push the cum back inside you and when it dribbles out again, I eat you out until you want to scream my name but you can’t, ‘cause you’re sucking on my fingers, licking every drip of cum left on them?” he suggests and you for a second, you think your knees are going to give out and you’ll fall flat. You don’t, likely because he still has his hands pressed to your backside.

“Oh, I’d want nothing more,” you shamelessly admit.

“Then we’re not doing it here,” he announces, laughing at the immediate sulky reaction it elicited from you. “Don’t be like that, it’s better if we go to my place,” he chuckles at you, gently squeezing your butt. “I want us to enjoy the night, go for as many rounds as our bodies can take and then do it again in the morning. We can’t have that here while some freshman is doing a keg stand and anyone can walk in on us at any second. We can piss Joon off later - but it’s the first time we’re gonna do it and damn it, I wanna do it right.”

“You wanna do it right?” your eyebrows rise.

“I could stand here all night and list all the things that I want to do to you, and you to me, and still remember more on the way home - and we’ve already discussed a bunch. I want to treat you good and give you the best fuck of your life - I promised as much and I want to deliver. We can fuck in Joon’s house any other day, honestly.”

“Do you want to… use something tonight?” you ask, pressing your hand against his crotch a little bit harder this time. “I have some toys back at my place but we won’t be alone there.”

“Nah,” he shakes his head immediately. “I have my cock, mouth and fingers - I don’t need much else to make you want to never do anyone else. We’ll have plenty of time for all the toys - and when I say all, I mean all. I’d go for anything with you.”

“If you keep talking like that, I’m just going to cum right here, right now,” you admit.

“While that would be a sight for sore eyes, I have other plans. Let’s go,” he takes you by the hand and away you go, making your way through the crowd, not caring if anyone notices how quickly you’re leaving or how you’re walking hand in hand.

You simply don’t give a shit, at all. All you care about is Hoseok right now - his dick, mouth and fingers and all the things he plans to do with them.

#hoseok smut #jhope smut #bts smut #hoseok fanfic #hoseok series #bts fanfic #bts series #thebtswritersclub #bangtanarmynet

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crybabykiko · 5 years ago

Note

I'm not sure if u take requests but if u do could u write a NSFW alphabet for Issei?¿ ♡

So lemme tell you something- I got this req and the first thing that came out of my mouth was BIIIIIIIIITTTTCCCCHHHHHH

And I proceeded to scream cry and yell about this for idk how long. I put so much thought into this- I literally wrote it in almost one night completely. I have SO much to say about this man. My Issei brainrot is only fueled by my stupid horny Pisces brain- WHICH HE ALSO HAS god bless him. Anyway enough about me this turned my mind into soup and it all fell out of my ears enjoy ur fucking horse cock

NSFW Alphabet- Matsukawa Issei

No thoughts head he. 😌

gn!reader focused, obviously nsfw....

𝕬 - 𝕬𝖋𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖈𝖆𝖗𝖊

Best Service Dom. Best Dom EVER. Anything you want you get, you have to only say the words. Food? Already ordered so it would be there by the time you finished. Cuddles? His arms are wide open and his body is very warm. Sit in a bubble bath and scroll through your favorite online stores? The bath is nice and warm and his credit card is at your disposal. He takes amazing care of you, and will stop at nothing to make you feel secure/safe/happy at all times..

𝕭 - 𝕭𝖔𝖉𝖞 𝕻𝖆𝖗𝖙

Welll…. I… we all know what it is. I’ll explain more later but in addition to that he also has the most amazing arms/abs. He’s very lean, definitely naturally so. Doesn’t need to work out but does so anyway keep toned.

𝕮 - 𝕮𝖚𝖒

Likes to cum inside you, but simply so that he can watch it ooze out of your hole. Sometimes he’ll even keep fucking you after he’s finished to see himself push it back in even after it’s out.

𝕯 - 𝕯𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖞 𝕾𝖊𝖈𝖗𝖊𝖙

I hate adding this but he has a foot fetish. Not like a hardcore creepy kind of foot fetish- he just likes to suck a toe here and there. But only if they’re freshly pedicured… he’s very picky. He’ll give foot massages all the time tho if you ask him. He just never tells anyone about it because he knows his friends will clown him.

Not ur foot but close enough he would get you one of those little golden name anklets and kiss it every time he lifts your leg over his shoulder. 👀🦋

𝕰 - 𝕰𝖝𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖎𝖊𝖓𝖈𝖊

Absolutely. He’s done a lot in his life, and is not short on any stories of past encounters. He is kind of a sex encyclopedia, but he’s very casual about it. If you bri bc up something you wanna try, 11/10 times he’s going to not only have done it, but be able to suggest ways for you to make it better- with several anecdotes.

𝕱 - 𝕱𝖆𝖛𝖔𝖗𝖎𝖙𝖊 𝕻𝖔𝖘𝖎𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

Doesn’t just like doggy- it is his lifeblood. It’s easier for him to control your movements while also making sure that he can bury himself all the way inside. He can have a vice grip on your hips one moment, his fists full of your hair the next- and if he starts spanking you well… that’s between you two and god.

He does like plain old missionary too, but only bc he can see himself in your tummy.

𝕲 - 𝕲𝖔𝖔𝖋𝖞

It makes him laugh sometimes when you struggle to take him all at once. He thinks it cute that you try, but it’s hilarious how big your head gets sometimes. He has to fuck you dumb and remind you that you can’t do that.

𝕳 - 𝕳𝖆𝖎𝖗

Trims, but not super short. He does wax his happy trail tho bc it makes him self-conscious.

𝕴 - 𝕴𝖓𝖙𝖎𝖒𝖆𝖈𝖞

Can actually be very romantic if he wants to. He is a Pisces, after all. He does enjoy foreplay and the sensuality of that to get you prepped, and he takes extra care to make sure you’re fully ready. He is going to be hard on you, but understands that he has to take good care of you, and he does

𝕵 - 𝕵𝖆𝖈𝖐 𝕺𝖋𝖋

Daily. At least once. It keeps the stress away and livens his mood. He does it as soon as he wakes up, and then if he’s having a really hard day or difficulty sleeping, he can do it to ease his nerves.

𝕶 - 𝕶𝖎𝖓𝖐

Size, obvious because everyone is smaller than him Skdkfkf he’s a giant. He’s 6’2 and his cock is at least 3 feet of that.

Daddy Kink, self explanatory mostly. It’s just so fucking sweet on his ears, his baby cooing for their daddy, trying so hard to work his entire cock into their tiny hole, trying to be so good for him… he loses it every time.

Voyeurism, likes watching you touch yourself. He finds it amusing how you think you can get yourself there without his help. You both know that’s impossible, but it turns him on to see you try.

Praise, again- he loves to make you feel special. And you work so hard fitting all of him inside, he has to tell you how good of a job you’re doing, especially because he’s appreciative of you letting him impale you. He has to let you know.

Mutual Masturbation, Kinda goes with voyeurism. If you’re away from each other, you’re definitely going to have sex via FaceTime- he just wants to see you, and also wants you to see him. To him, it lets you know you’re the only one that can get him there, and that your presence alone- even if he’s not touching you, is more than enough.

Lingerie, Loves nothing more than seeing you all pretty for him. He also just really likes the feeling of lace or silk against his fingertips He can get out of control and rip your sets tho- but don’t worry, death is a very lucrative business- He will buy you several replacements.

𝕷 - 𝕷𝖔𝖈𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

LOVES car sex. If the mood strikes, he WILL pull over. But really, he’ll take it wherever he can get it.

𝕸 - 𝕸𝖔𝖙𝖎𝖛𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

He’s very eager to please. A little lazy, yes, but at his core he wants to make sure you’re feeling good.

𝕹 - 𝕹𝖔!

He has done literally everything at least once and the one thing he just can’t get into is piss. One bad experience and a 3 month uti later he’s sworn off it for good.

𝕺 - 𝕺𝖗𝖆𝖑

Not his favorite. He could honestly go with or without it personally, just because there’s so much of him. But he will happily fuck your throat if you want him to, and will go down on you for hours to make sure you’re truly prepped. For someone who’s not a big fan of it, he’s actually AMAZING with his mouth. It’s lazy but in the best way possible.

𝕻 - 𝕻𝖆𝖈𝖊

Starts off slow so you’re good to go, but will pick up the pace as you stretch out. He does enjoy a few slow deep thrusts in between drilling you into oblivion tho. He never tries to make your guts into a smoothie on purpose, it just kinda happens that way.

𝕼 - 𝕼𝖚𝖎𝖈𝖐𝖎𝖊

He will never say no to quickie. The amount of fast food bathrooms and abandoned parking lots you’ve seen is astronomical. The amount of times Makki has kicked you out of his apartment for trying something while he goes to the bathroom is even higher.

𝕽 - 𝕽𝖎𝖘𝖐

He's the classic degen. bf who reaches across the table at the same time as your dad when you go “daddy can you pass the salt?”

So yes, he’s definitely going to tease you under a table at thanksgiving dinner.

He’s really going to have you whenever he wants- even if it comes at the expense of your pride/morals sometimes.

𝕾 - 𝕾𝖙𝖆𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖆

Can go on forever if you let him. Will overstim you to hell and back before he even thinks about cumming. Doesn’t even know he’s doing it- he’s so used to fucking you brainless that he doesn’t realize it’s too much. But he is SUPER apologetic about it and will make sure to treat you extra carefully.

𝕿 - 𝕿𝖔𝖞

He actually has a few for when he’s feeling lazy. He used to run through fleshlights like they were tictacs but he’s since finally found one that he won’t break.

He got most of them for free because he worked in a sex shop during college- he was very popular.

𝖀 - 𝖀𝖓𝖋𝖆𝖎𝖗

Yes. He will 100% rile you up with touches that seem innocent enough in nature, but are a tad bit too low, or linger on for a bit too long.

Will also give you “the look” in public and pretend he doesn’t know what you’re talking about- he definitely does.

𝖁 - 𝖁𝖔𝖑𝖚𝖒𝖊

Vocal in bed, especially with praise. Will constantly tell you how good you’re doing or how good you feel. Doesn’t moan a lot, but they slip out from time to time. Instead it’s a lot of deep breaths, groans, and curses.

𝖂 - 𝖂𝖎𝖑𝖉𝖈𝖆𝖗𝖉

If mortuary school hadn’t have worked out, he and Makki were going to start their own porn company. They actually have a very solid business plan. They made a pact to sit on it for now, since Issei is working at the funeral home.

𝖃 - 𝖃-𝕽𝖆𝖞

LMFAOOOOO

Literally a foot long. Longer actually. I’m going to honestly say 13. No I won’t take it back. Perfect thickness too. Honestly it’s like… god really took his time and got it fucking right. Everything about his physique is perfect- it would only make sense his cock is that perfect to match. Color is even all around, the head is bubblegum pink. There’s also one very prominent vein on the underside, and a few tinier trails of veins on the top. The statue of David? Don’t know her. Only know the statue of Issei.

𝖄 - 𝖄𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌

High sex drive, but he can keep it subdued if he has to. Especially because he knows he’s too much for most people. He's not shy about it though. Is CONSTANTLY horny on main. Not that you mind.

𝖅 - 𝖅𝖟𝖟

Service Dom through and through. He won’t sleep until you do, and even if he’s dead tired, he won’t sleep at all if you’re staying awake. He’s going to do everything to take care of you and your needs first. When you do sleep he likes to hold your head to his chest and will press his nose down into your hair so he can fall asleep surrounded by your scent.

Taglist Starseeds (check ur privacy settings if your url is in bold): @honey-makki @crushzone @yumekosgamblingroom @boujiesav @onesingleravioli @ushijimasfarmhat @trouvelle @nekoma-hoe @right-shoe-jpg @atsumusc0ck @ukaic @nivky0-0 @animoozies @charmarsmith

#daisy’s red light district 🚨#haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu hc #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu smut #hq headcanons #hq x reader #mattsun x reader #hq smut #mattsun smut #haikyuu drabble #hq drabble #haikyuu fic #hq fic

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order-of-river-phoenix · 4 years ago

Text

Better Off As Lovers; Josh Ray Person

Fandom: HBO War; Generation Kill

A/N: hi hello how are ya? I’ve arisen. Ik I’ve got some requests piled up and I will get around to them, a couple of them I started working on forever ago. I just wanted to do a little self-indulgent writing to get me going. Also I tried to make this as gender neutral as possible but if anyone had any critiques pls let me know!

Warnings: dumb boy syndrome and some language

Taglist: @stressedinadress @hellitwasyoufirstsergeant @ricksmorty @hbohmygodx @meteora-fc @vintagelavenderskies @hoosiers-hoe @mavysnavy @inglourious-imagines @warrior-healer @joe-webgott @hannahbear1 @punkgeekcryptid

**reminder: if you’ve since changed your name/url please either let me know so I can change it or change it at the link in my description; ALSO feel free to add/remove yourself as you wish**

__________

"Don't expect me to send you any heartfelt letters about how much I miss you," Ray teased.

"Why because you won't miss me or because you think it's dumb to write letters?"

"Both."

You punched his shoulder, knowing at least one of those wasn't true. "Please. If anything, I won't be missing you. I'll finally be able to lead a peaceful life. I mean, I'm still banned from half the grocery stores in the county—because of you, I might add—"

"Technicality," he interrupted. "You're still banned. Doesn't matter if I had anything to do with it."

"Whatever." You rolled your eyes, and you both laughed, but your chest was growing a little tight. You weren't going to say it out loud though. "Take care of yourself. I have no doubt they'll kick your ass in boot camp."

"Don't worry about my ass, Y/N." Ray was grinning now. "Although," he craned his neck around to try and peek at his backside, "I can see why you would."

You had never wanted to kiss Josh Ray Person before in your life, and you'd known him for most of it. But right now, with the thought of him being gone, a small part of you wished it would happen. A bigger, much more reasonable part reminded you why that would be a very bad idea.

"Hey," he said, his voice softening slightly at your change in expression. "No sad goodbyes, remember?"

You blinked away any sadness forming in your eyes and threw him a dumb, cheesy smile. "Do I have to spell it out for you, Ray? I'm not sad."

"Oh okay." He pulled you in for a hug, and you welcomed the embrace. "Well, if you ever do get sad and miss me, I left a copy of the band's demo in your car for you."

_____four years later_____

Ray kept himself awake with caffeine and thoughts of being home.

Both amusing and grating to everyone else, when it came to Ray, with thinking came talking. "And my best friend, Y/N—don't worry, Brad, I still love you—decided to ride around the grocery store in a cart, paddling along with a broom. We weren't allowed to even be in the Save-A-Lot parking lot for two years."

He knew if you had been there you would have corrected him. It hadn't been your idea. He dared you, and you could never turn down a dare. That was one of the foundations of your friendship.

"So... Y/N is the one you're dating right?" Trombley questioned from the back.

Ray resisted the urge to throw a confused look at the kid. However, he had to keep his eyes somewhat focused on the road ahead. "What? No. Y/N's been my best friend forever."

"Oh. Well, you talk about Y/N more than your girlfriend," Trombley noted.

"What? That's not true," Ray scoffed. "Brad, tell them that's not true."

"Person, I can't even remember your girlfriend's name, but I'm quite certain I met Y/N."

"What the fuck is that even supposed to mean? I just have more stories with Y/N because I've known them longer." Ray huffed a few things to himself about how ridiculous this was and how you two were basically siblings.

"It would make complete sense for you to be dating someone that was related to you," Brad slyly added in response to Ray's mumbling.

"Now you're just being obscene. We're not related, and besides, I'm not from that kind of town."

"Ray, you come from a whiskey tango hick town where couples meet at family reunions, and you're living proof." Brad blinked maybe twice while delivering this blow. "Now tell us more about the person you're not dating."

__________

You happened to be outside your own parent's home when a car stopped at the curb. You squinted, trying to see who was inside.

"Ray? That you?" you called as he rounded in front of the car to where you stood in the yard.

"The one and only."

"Well, I'll be damned. How long you been home?" You made your way to him and greeted him with a hug. Even after only brief visits over the last few years, he was still your best friend.

"Just got back today. I stopped by my parents' first and figured I'd find you somewhere."

"And you found me. How are you?" You knew that whatever his answer was, it would only be a partial truth.

"Not bad. Happier now that I've can shit in a familiar toilet.”

You laughed, knowing he’d prefer that over whatever concerns you had for him. “So—“

“I love you,” he interrupted.

Whatever you had been about to say had dissipated from your thoughts like vapor. “I... I love you too.” You frowned, realizing this was a strange moment.

That was always an unspoken truth between you two. Neither of you had ever needed to say it.

A wide grin spread across his face. And maybe... relief? “Thank God. I thought you were going to punch me.”

“I may still,” you warned, though your smile called you a liar.

“Well, while you decide on that, do you want to come over for dinner tonight?”

“Did you ask me out on a date?”

“I mean, it’ll be at my parents’ house, and my family will be there.” Ray was rarely flustered but appeared to be a little pink in the cheeks now. “But we can do something alone after.”

“That sounds nice.”

“Any time with you is a nice time,” he beamed.

You groaned and squeezed his shoulder, falling back into your comfortable back and forth. “Don’t go corny on me, Ray. Tell me I’m stupid or something.”

“You’re stupid cute.”

Internally wincing, you weren’t sure if the cringing truly outweighed how endearing it was to hear him do anything other than jokingly tease you. “What time do I need to be there?”

“Be ready by 5. I’ll pick you up.”

“Classy.”

“You sound surprised.”

“Ray, you never fail to surprise me.”

#mariah writes: generation kill #generation kill #josh ray person #ray person #generation kill imagine #ray person x reader

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velvetmel0n · 5 years ago

Text

First Time For Everything

Summary: Sleeping together counts as anger management, right?

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 3.5k

Warnings: It’s 3k+ words of smut, idk either ya’ll but uhhh penetrative sex, sex in a hallway, mutual pining?? Don’t know how that happened but we also got some good old fashioned thigh riding and a teensy bit of almost-but-not-quite-exhibitionism and Poe’s hot for it, fight me

A/N: Given my URL is anyone surprised I wrote for him first? No

The first time it happens it’s angry. Or it starts that way, at least.

You’d been arguing about something, maybe nothing at this point because it seemed all the pilot had to do was breathe in your direction some days and you two were at each other’s throats, hurling insults and accusations back and forth and you think that you might hit him this time, actually hit him. Slap him across the face so that your hand leaves a red, stinging outline on his cheek or punch him hard enough to hopefully break his nose and not your hand. But that’s not what happens.

What happens instead is that he crowds you, pushing into your space and you’re wishing you had the Force because you would knock him back into last Tuesday and- and then he’s kissing you. His mouth comes down hard against your own like he’s trying to wordlessly continue the argument, chapped lips working yours and demanding a response from you.

Maker help you, you give him one.

You dig your nails into his shoulders, scratch them down the arms that he’s using to yank you closer to him when he licks into your mouth because you’re still angry with him and the stunts he pulls. He shoves you harder against the wall in response, hard enough for your breath to stall in your throat, hard enough that your skin prickles and something twists in your belly, heat suffusing your body.

And…and that might be the precise moment when all that anger you kept stoked for Poe Dameron starts to spiral into the type of lust that you can’t ignore, can’t just pretend like it’s not burning a hole through the pit of your stomach. Not when his tongue is down your throat and his hands are in your hair, on your hips, grabbing fist fulls of fabric and pulling.

Your head is starting to spin from the combined effects of lack of oxygen and the feel of his stubble abrading your skin and you can’t quite remember why kissing him is such a bad idea. Why you had always tried to cut yourself off from whatever feelings you may or may not have for him like they were a gangrenous limb. But for as hard as you tried to push them away you still got nervous whenever he took off, knowing he was a good pilot but also knowing he had no problems almost killing himself for the possibility of saving the galaxy. It happened before and it’s bound to happen again; it almost happened today for crying out loud and if you were the self analyzing sort you might think that that’s the reason he got on your nerves so easily.

But he keeps eating at your mouth, nipping at your lip and a groan, quiet and rough, slips from him when your fingers twist in the curls at the back of his neck and you nip him back. And just like that you aren’t able to think about anything else that isn’t getting him to make that sound again.

His mouth finally breaks from yours and then he’s at your throat, mouthing at the sensitive skin under your ear and swirling his tongue against your flesh like he wants to see how you taste here, too. One of your hands move to grip the collar of his stupid, bright orange flight suit like a lifeline when he continues down the column of your neck, only dimly aware of the fact that you two are in some shadowy alcove and caring less and less about the chance of someone catching you two.

Then he shoves a thigh between your own and you don’t care at all.

You stop breathing for a moment, suspended in time before your hips stutter into a roll and all that air you’d been holding whooshes out of your lungs in a long sigh. “That’s it,” They’re the first words he’s said since corning you against the wall, his tone dark and low. Almost…soft. At odds with the way he’s been working your neck over with his teeth, no doubt leaving marks that you’d find later after you’ve come to your senses.

“Thaaat’s it,” He praises again, one of his big hands falling to your hip to wrench you harder against him until your clit is mashed against the meat of his thigh. Heat floods your system, his name little more than a puff of air leaving your lips and you’re helpless to stop yourself from grinding down. Your hands scramble to grab something, anything, ending up catching his face and pulling him back up to you, muffling your moan against his lips.

You feel like you could melt into a puddle right here against the wall, reduced to some quivering mess, and you want nothing more than to drag him down with you. He’s palming your breasts through your shirt now, finding your nipple through the fabric and pinching. You can feel the bulge of his cock against your thigh and the heat of it makes your mouth start to water and you want to go to your knees for him and take him into your mouth because… Well because you want to make him shake and pant and moan.

And then you hear the voices.

And instead of breaking apart, of doing the smart thing and running away before anyone catches you, the bastard grins at you. It’s a sharp, almost devious slash of white teeth in the shadows as he replaces his thigh with his hand.

“They won’t know we’re here if you don’t make any noise,” He mutters at your ear and the urge to hit him is back as the voices draw closer, panic rising in your chest just as fast as the whole aroused, willing-to-jump-Poe-Fucking-Dameron-in-a-hallway thing had.

“Let me go!” You hiss, afraid even that would alert whoever was coming, but to no avail. You try to stand on your tippy toes, try to crane your neck to see if they’ve turned down the hallway yet, and all the while Poe is working his hand into your pants with a renewed sense of urgency, like the threat of being caught excites him.

Because of course it does.

This was insane; ridiculous, dumb, quite possibly the worst decision you have made in the past three months, maybe longer. You hate him and you hate his stupid, reckless- oh. The breath leaves your lungs when a single, calloused finger runs along the length of your slit. You hadn’t been expecting him to completely fucking bypass your underwear, hadn’t been prepared for the feel of it.

Poe’s mouth falls open as he watches your expressions, watches the way your eyelids almost slip closed and your teeth sink into your lip. “I knew you liked me,” It’s a taunt, but it’s breathless and there’s no real venom behind it, the pilot too wrapped up in how wet you are for him. How soft, how hot. You’re practically dripping into his palm at this point and if he’s being honest with himself he wants to drown in it.

“You’re such a bastard,” You’re rocking your hips towards him all the same though, trying not to whine because he’s- he’s playing with you now. Just spreading your slick around, avoiding your clit entirely might you add, like he can’t get over the fact that it’s for him. You grab at his flight suit again, needing to hold onto something as he keeps petting you, dragging his fingers along your slit and over your lips, acting like he has all the time in the world despite the voices growing louder and clearer and you think you might actually cry if he keeps this up.

Your head starts to loll back against the wall as he keeps rubbing at you, giving you just enough stimulation to set your teeth on edge, but then he’s grabbing your jaw and leaning closer, pressing his forehead into yours. “Look at me,” It’s stern, more of a command than anything else. If this was any other time, if you weren’t in a hallway and if his hand wasn’t between your legs, there’s a good chance you would tell him to fuck right off on principle. But here you are and his hand isn’t stopping, and, embarrassingly, something about his tone is just…just working for you.

So you manage to pry open your eyes, vulnerability rocking through you when you meet his gaze head on. His eyes are dark and hungry, pupils blown out and flickering around your face like he’s trying to catch every little bite of your lip, every flinch when he touches you in just the right spot. He looks so absorbed in what he’s doing, staring at you hard like he’s trying to read your fucking mind or something and it’s affecting you just as much as his fingers are.

“Poe,” You try to appeal to him again, hearing footsteps now and your voice is high and tight from fear and the fact that he’s decided that pushing a finger into you at this exact moment is the best course of action. And, inanely, you think that nothing has felt as good as this. Then he presses the pad of his thumb against your swollen clit and begins to rub little circles into the bundle of nerves and you stand corrected; nothing has ever felt as good as this. You desperately try to suck in enough air, a whine building in your throat. He shushes you, giving your jaw a short squeeze you take to mean as him telling you to shut up and, miraculously given the current set of circumstances, you manage to swallow back any noises you’re attempting to make.

You’re unable to look away from him when he begins to feed another finger into your soaked pussy and starts to leisurely pump them in and out, never once breaking eye contact with you. Dimly you realize that the footsteps have turned down some other corridor before they reached you and you really want to say that that’s the main reason you start sagging against the wall, hips rolling as best they could with the somewhat awkward positioning.

He seems intent on dragging your pleasure out for as long as possible but the chance of getting caught is still very much present and despite your hazy brain, you know you might not get lucky the next time.

You tackle his suit with shaking hands, trying to remember how to breathe because he keeps filling you up to the knuckle with his fingers and you can feel the rough drag of them against your walls. You fumble the zipper once, twice, yanking it down on the third try- and you can’t stop the disappointment that bubbles to the surface when you see he’s wearing a shirt underneath.

You lean forwards and begin to mouth at his neck all the same, smiling against his skin when you feel the hand between your thighs stutter, stalling for several moments while he’s distracted by your mouth on his skin before he resumes fucking you with his fingers. You keep going, sucking and nibbling marks to match your own while your hands run over his torso appreciatively, wishing you two weren’t in a hallway so you could take your time to explore him.

Instead you keep heading towards your destination, tugging his zipper down further so you’re able to push your hand into his underwear. You decide to forgo any teasing and wrap your hand around the hard length of him, preening when he makes a noise that sounds somewhere between a choke and a moan from low in his throat. His free hand comes up to brace himself on the wall beside your head and he leans into you, breathing harshly while you stroke him.

Stars, he’s thick. Thicker than you imagined he’d be- not that you imagined this, not like you fantasized about what his cock might be like when you were keyed up and couldn’t sleep, or at any other time of day for that matter. No, not like that at all.

You peek down and you’re just able to catch a glimpse of the tip between your bodies, and fuck he’s pretty too. Ruddy and weeping underneath your palm as you twist and pull and swipe your thumb through the beads of pearly fluid collecting there, wishing they were on your tongue instead.

“Let me fuck you,” He breathes, thrusting into your first. He presses his lips over yours before you can answer in an open mouthed kiss. “Please let me fuck you,” It’s a ragged plea against your mouth and how could you possibly say no to Poe Dameron begging?

“If you don’t I swear I’ll stran-strangle you,” It’s less threatening than you wanted it to be, your voice keening and needy, but it got the job done and that’s all you could ask for given your current state. He slips his fingers from you and you can’t stop yourself from whining with the loss, with the promise of what’s about to replace them.

He doesn’t waste any time, his hand replacing your own and the anticipation of it all has your toes curling in your boots before he stops short, the blunt head of his cock just…Just slipping across your folds, coating himself in your slick. You can’t help but squirm because yes, it feels amazing because the head of his cock keeps sawing over you clit but you want him inside, dammit. You’re about to goad him more, wanting to tell him that if he doesn’t get on with it you’re going to blast him in his pretty face, when he finally pushes into your weeping cunt.

You stop breathing, sure that you’ve never been more full in your life, and he’s making another of those choked off, moaning sounds from somewhere in his chest. He mutters something you don’t catch over the sound of your own blood rushing in your ears and then he’s moving, slow and steady at first but picking up steam until he’s pounding you into the wall. Thankfully he still has enough sense to slap a hand over your mouth because honestly, you shouldn’t be held responsible for the sounds you’re making right now.

You claw at his shirt, his suit, trying to keep him as close to you as possible. He moves his hand from the wall to slip under your leg, hitching it up as much as he could with your pants pulled tight around your knees and something about that slight shift in angle has you locking up when he hits some magical spot that you didn’t even realize you had, squeezing your eyes so tight a tear leaks out because now he’s slowed down again. Letting you feel every ridge and vein of his cock as he drills it into that spot over and over again and you really, really do not have time for this but it just feels so good.

You try to tell him you’re about to cum, you really do. But he still has his hand over your mouth and the most you can do is let out some pathetic whimper against it. The muscles in your abdomen tighten and he shuffles impossibly closer to you, not so much thrusting as he is grinding into you now and keeping delicious pressure on that one piece of you that had you seeing stars and your clit is pressed up against his pubic bone and just like that it’s over.

Your eyes flutter and roll back into your head while you claw at him, sobbing into his hand as your body melts down around him in a rush of heat and wet. His head pops up from where it was resting on your shoulder, watching you through almost delirious eyes while he works you through it, hips doubling down until you almost can’t take it anymore.

He isn’t going to last, not after that. Not after the sounds you made, how absolutely wrecked you were as you shook in his arms. “Wh-where do you…where do you want it,” He slurs, trying to keep it together for just a little bit longer. He doesn’t remember to take his hand away from your mouth until you mumble something against it.

“Insi-side,” He can’t exactly cum anywhere else and expect to keep this little tryst a secret, but you think it’s nice that he still asked. Maybe there is a gentlemanly side of Poe hidden somewhere after all. Hallway-fucking not withstanding.

At your words he makes a noise that sounds almost painful and hunkers over you, curling his body around yours and goes to town with his hips plowing into yours. You wrap your arms around him and hold him close, catching his jaw with your hand and dragging him into an open mouthed, sloppy kiss.

Something twists in your gut then, pulling tight like an electrified wire that runs the length of your spine and you have a moment of disbelief. The only sounds are harsh breathing, Poe’s hips slamming into yours muffled by the thick fabric of his flight suit, and the obscene sounds of his cock disappearing into your body, and you think that you might actually cum again.

Again.

In the hallway.

This couldn’t be real. You had just gone too long without getting laid and are having some sort of hyper realistic fever dream to compensate. But then Poe shoves himself as deep as he can go and fucking stays there and the wire holding your entire body together at this point just snaps. Your pussy clenches around his cock and then it’s just bliss, complete bliss, because you feel him jolt against you, how he’s throbbing and wow you really didn’t think it would feel this good to have his warmth coating your insides but it does. You’re still trying to regain the ability to breathe properly when he starts talking.

”Fuck,” You’re consoled by the fact that he sounds as wrecked as you feel, but he keeps going, murmuring like he was in a daze while he mouthed at your skin. Not really doing anything in particular, but like he wanted to just…feel you. Ghosting his lips over your pulse point, running his tongue over the corner of your jaw. Kissing your shoulder. He tells you how good you felt, feel around him because he hasn’t pulled out of you yet, how perfect you are at taking him.

You soak up the praise like a sponge, the words going straight to your head and making you want to purr. You have to return to reality though, and you’re only allowed a few moments of being blissed out with a complimenting, affectionate Poe before you snap out of it.

“Okay get off, get off, get off,” You chant, trying to push his shoulders and pull up your pants at the same time. “We need to go.” His cock slips from you with all the jumping around you’re doing and you aren’t prepared for how empty you feel without it, how fucking bereft. Nope, you aren’t dealing with that right now. No way. You’d deal with your sudden, apparently emotional attachment to Poe Dameron’s cock when you aren’t at risk of getting caught with your pants down. Literally.

The pilot can’t help but chuckle at how frantic you are, unceremoniously yanking your pants up and trying to smooth out the wrinkles, trying to make yourself look as presentable as possible. All he has to do is tuck himself back into his pants and zip his flight suit, meaning all of his concentration can be on you. Warmth blooms in his chest and he wants to kiss you again, just kiss you.

He really didn’t plan on this to happen when he followed you, honest. He was just continuing the fight, dogging your heels in a way he knew would have you seeing red. Maybe he’s a masochist -or a sadist, considering- but he loves it when you’re angry. Not because of anything real or meaningful; the kind of anger that comes from pushed buttons and butting heads, the kind that makes your eyes light up and all your attention focus on him and him alone. Schoolyard tactics sure, but it was the one surefire way he had of monopolizing your time and he wasn’t above using it to his own selfish reasons

“See you around, Dameron!” You toss the words over your shoulder as you speed walk away from him, trying not to break into a run back to your room in your haste to get away from the scene of the crime… and your feelings, but that’s neither here nor there.

He frowns at your retreating back. A few minutes ago he was Poe. He was Poe and you couldn’t get enough of him, were almost climbing him like a tree in an effort to get closer and if it wasn’t for your pants getting in the way, he was sure you would have.

But he doesn’t start to follow you again. As much as he wants to, he just stands there in the hallway, looking lost before he collects himself. You’d talk about this later, whatever this had just turned into because he doesn’t want it to end. Not even close.

#poe dameron x reader #poe dameron x you #poe dameron smut #star wars fic #hoo boy my very first smut #I've spent too long looking at it I can't tell if it's good or not

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calumance · 5 years ago

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baby logan needs more attention than he gets i feel like he’d be such a sweet snuggly kid, toddler logan would definitely never leave calums side cause aidens always with mama when he can be so logan just sticks by calums side whenever they’re out and it’s just cute cause he could be playing or doing whatever like other kids but he’s just hangin with cal, listening to whatever conversation calums having and just being happy that they can hangout. i can imagine logan calling cal his best friend🥺

Logan has always been a curious little guy, but his questions always lead to the CUTEST moments.😭😭😭😭😭

Calum parked the car in the Target parking lot, the car filled with his favorite people: Logan, Aiden, and his wife. They had to go to the store to buy snacks and a gift for the wedding shower that their friends were throwing later in the evening. The second Calum parked the car, Aiden jumped out of the car and grabbed his mom’s hand, excited to pull her towards the toy aisle. Calum smiled as he shut the driver’s door and opened the door behind his to unlatch Logan’s restraints on his car seat. Once Logan’s feet touched the ground, he immediately reached up asking for Calum’s hand. Without a second of hesitation, Calum reached down and grabbed Logan’s tiny hand.

Together Logan and Calum walked into the store. Once inside the doors, Logan put his hands on the first shopping cart he saw. “Can I sit in the front?” Logan asked while pointing to the baby seat.

“Of course, little man.” Calum pulled the shopping cart away from the others and bent at the knees to lift Logan into the seat. Logan helped Calum by placing his feet through the holes and then slid into the seat. Logan giggled as Calum poked his nose and pushed the cart forward beginning their shopping trip.

“Daddy, are you and mommy married?” Ever since Logan heard what a wedding shower was, he’s been very curious about the whole thing.

Calum smiled as he reached his arm out to a vegetable platter, “We are. We’ve been married for almost ten years now. That’s one year longer than Aiden’s age.”

Logan nodded. For being only three years old, he did comprehend certain things more than most three-year-olds. “Are Uncle Luke and Aunt Sierra married?”

“Yeah, they’re married too.” Calum smiled and dropped the platter into the big section of the shopping car. Logan turned to look at it while Calum explained, “They’ve been married for five years. That’s three more years than your age.”

Logan nodded again and looked up at Calum. Calum’s heart swelled with the way his eyes widened every time Logan looked at him. He knew he fell in love with Logan the day he was born, but with each day, Calum love’s him more and more. Calum reached up and ran his hand through Logan’s hair.

“Daddy, do you love me like you love mommy?” Logan asked as Calum moved the shopping cart through the produce section.

“I love you very much, buddy, but the love I have for mommy is a little different than the love I have for you.” Logan tilted his head slightly, urging Calum to explain what that meant. Calum took a deep breath trying to figure out the most appropriate way to explain the difference. “I love mommy in a way that makes my tummy feel weird, a good weird, I love you in a way that makes my heart feel warm.” Calum held his breath hoping that was good enough for Logan. Logan nodded and looked at his hands.

“Do you have a best friend? I’ve heard mommy use that phrase when talking about Auntie Alex.” Alex was his mom’s best friend. They had known each other for a long time, longer than Calum had known her.

Calum pulled his eyebrows together, realizing that his kid was just a sponge when it came to anything that was said around him. “I have three.” Logan’s eyes widened thinking that having more than one was impossible. Calum chuckled and looked around the aisle for what he was looking for. “Your Uncle Luke, Uncle Mike, and Uncle Ashton are all my best friends.”

Logan pulled his eyebrows together, “I thought they were your brothers?” Another thing he’d heard come out of Calum’s mouth multiple times.

“Sometimes friends can seem like siblings. You know how Aiden takes care of you?” Calum asked as he reached around Logan, dropping another item into the cart. Logan nodded, “Well, Uncle Luke, Uncle Mike, Uncle Ashton and I all take care of each other how Aiden takes care of you. They’re not my actual brothers, but I like to think of them as siblings. Does that make sense?” Logan has always been good at letting Calum know when he needed to explain something more. He’s been that way since he could talk; Logan nodded.

Logan smiled from ear to ear and leaned forward, “I have a best friend too!” He exclaimed.

“Oh yeah?” Calum said with a smile after stopping the cart and stretching to the top shelf to grab a jar.

Furiously, Logan nodded his head, “It’s you, daddy! You’re my best friend.” Logan smiled and swung his feet back and forth, his heels hitting the plastic shopping cart every few kicks.

Feeling as if his heart was about to explode, Calum placed his hand over his chest. Logan was dead serious, and Calum suddenly felt like crying. Instead, he gathered his composure and smiled back at his son. “You’re my best friend too, buddy.” Calum leaned forward and pressed his lips to Logan’s forehead. He giggled and Calum pushed the cart, the new mission being to find Aiden and his wife.

Later in the evening, they made it to the wedding shower. Seeing the other kids, Aiden took off and started playing. Logan held onto Calum’s hand tighter and ducked behind his legs. Sierra squatted and smiled at Logan, “Low-gy, why don’t you go play with the other kids?”

Sierra had called Logan Low-gy since they day he was born. No one exactly knew why, but no one exactly stopped her either. Logan shook his head and Calum bent down to be at eye level with Logan. Logan held a tight grip of Calum’s finger, but Calum didn’t fight it. “Why don’t you go play with the other kids? I promise you’ll have fun.”

“I want to stay with you.” Logan said while nervously putting his pointer finger in his mouth. Not wanting to force Logan to do anything he didn’t want to do, Calum nodded and placed his hands under Logan’s arms. Calum lifted Logan onto his hip and nodded at Sierra and his wife, who both shrugged and headed outside where all of the other adults were gathered.

Once outside, Calum found a seat and placed Logan on his lap. Logan leaned forward and pressed his head against Calum’s chest. Calum’s heart swelled as he kissed the top of Logan’s head and rubbed his hand up and down his back.

Throughout the night, Calum partook in all of the conversations, most of them being things that were way beyond Logan’s knowledge. Every once in a while, Calum would notice Logan looking up at him. To which Calum would smile at him and kiss his forehead. Logan would then lean his head back on Calum’s chest and snuggle closer to him.

After the party ended, Calum loaded Logan into his car seat, and his wife loaded Aiden who had crashed from the sugar almost an hour prior. Within minutes of being on the road, Logan was fast asleep in his car seat. “I noticed Logan’s been attached to you recently.” His wife said, reaching her hand for his.

Their fingers intwined as he looked in the mirror at his two kids sleeping in the backseat. “He told me I’m his best friend today.” Calum smiled as he lifted her fingers to his lips, kissing her knuckles gently.

“Oh my god, that’s the cutest thing I’ve ever heard.” She placed her hand over her chest and groaned, trying not to make a scene and wake the kids up. Calum couldn’t help but laugh at her struggling to keep it all together. “Do you think it’s because Aiden is always attached to me, so Logan is attached to you?”

In all honesty, Calum had never thought of it that way, but now that she mentioned it, there was a huge chance she was right. Calum shrugged, “Maybe, but I don’t mind, he’s my best friend, too.”

In her seat, she kicked her feet and rolled her lips into her mouth. She was struggling not to scream, and Calum knew it, she was a sucker for cute moments like this. Tears started to roll down her face and Calum laughed just as she started laughing. “I love this family so damn much.” She said while wiping the tears off her face. Calum looked in the mirror one more time, he couldn’t have said it any better.

************

Tag list: @mantlereid @notinthesameguey @viiirg0 @wheniminouterspace @thinkofmehlgh @another-lonely-heart @limer-encia @itsmytimetoodream @babyoria @treatallwithkindness @karajaynetoday @talkfastromance4

**If your URL has a strike through it’s because it won't let me tag you ☹️

Ko-fi

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jeongjaebae · 3 years ago

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Fic summary 2021

happy new year yall!! (*´∇｀*) it's been a little over a year since i started this blog, and oh boy what a journey it's been. before starting this blog, i was on a hiatus from writing since 2017 ish when i left my previous fandom, and i never expected to write again?? but finding a new fandom has changed that and well, here we are!!

thank you for supporting this little blog of mine whether you sent an ask or left a comment, aggressively reblogged 30 times in a row with memes attached, or said you wanted to punch me in the face (affectionately... i hope LMAO). thank you to my besties for putting up with my hyunjae enemy agenda, my regular anons for still being here, those that stop by, and anyone who has read something of mine and had it linger in their minds even for the briefest moment 🥺

aight 2021 fic summary up ahead, where i answer questions like fave fic written, most fun to write, hottest moment, and fave lines haha. keep reading if ur interested i guess!!

Total word count written: 151,269 (........i've never hit such a high number before)

Total word count published: 105,135

Fandoms written: tbz!! (and a tiny bit of nct if that counts)

1. Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or what you predicted?

WAY. MORE. just look at that count!! i checked my old blog and i've averaged about 70k words written per year there, with ~40k published. i really didn't expect to be so immersed in fic again!! to be able to catch up to my pre-hiatus skill level, surpass it, and then write this many words after a four year hiatus... i'm pretty amazed. so yes way more than i expected

2. What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January?

i think last january i didn't even know i would write for tbz HAHA. this was supposed to be a jaehyun blog (as you can tell by the url LMAO) and i only had jaehyun works at the time!!

3. What’s your own favourite story of the year?

hmm it's in between my big four: if the lipstick matches, you look hideous on me, heartbreak for hire, this is how we fall. i'll probably have to read them again to pick a fave but bc of recency bias and all... i'll go with this is how we fall.

4. Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?

tried writing sm*t, but it's not published so does that count? also bloom for you was a bit of a challenge bc i've never written a hanahaki au before nor have i read many of them, and writing a happy ending for it was kind of difficult bc how does one resolve THAT? think it worked out in the end though :')

5. Do you have any fanfic goals for the new year?

hmm i'd say it would be to write for myself? something i recently realized was how draining writing was becoming, and that was bc i focused so much on meticulously planning them that it was no longer enjoyable to write. so yes we're gonna go back to writing self indulgent fantasies only in the new year HAHA

From my past year of writing, what was…

My best story of this year:

this is how we fall. i know i hated it while writing it but i think it turned out quite nice, especially the way everything falls into place by the end of it. there are themes of fate and destiny weaved into it, and a nice balance of humour, character development, and heart fluttering feels. and well, i heard it made some people believe in love again hahaha

My most popular story of this year:

you look hideous on me, for sure. by a landslide. call me a one hit wonder 🥴 haha jk but i definitely underestimated how much people would like bad boy sunwoo. oh and they were soulmates :'))

Most fun story to write:

if the lipstick matches!! i definitely enjoyed writing this the most bc it was SOOOO self indulgent. literally me projecting my own organic chem lab experience... including the near-kiss in the lab with goggles on (pls don't try that yall!!) and the scene with hyunjae at the party hehe. i loved writing kyeobmuda as y/n's besties, and their dynamics were honestly so much fun. and of course, it was my first ever tbz fic 🥺

Story with the single sexiest moment:

that hyunjae e2l drabble 👀 is 👀 quite 👀 hot. the rest of it sitting in my wips is much hotter though HAHA. OH WAIT there's that scene at the end of you look hideous on me. yes that one.

Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story:

ALDKJFKJ THAT'S GOTTA BE TAKE A HINT I'M SORRY. i hate the fic. i have nothing to say about it.

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters:

heartbreak for hire maybe? it was my first time writing younghoon in a long fic and the first time i caught feels for him ok. now he's made his way to the top three on my bias list :')

Hardest story to write:

TAKE A HINT SMH but also this is how we fall. these two tripped me up so bad with the plot points, but in different ways. take a hint was too simple, being an f2l that i didn't really know what to do with. this is how we fall was.... WAY too complex that i had to cut out plot points and it took me a long time to figure out how to do that.

Biggest surprise:

that you look hideous on me would turn out to be as popular as it is???? or that i'd write a hyunjae angst that broke people.... or that i'd have anything to do with hyunjae at all 🤡🤡🤡

Most unintentionally telling story:

hmm i guess i always end up weaving personal beliefs and ideologies into my fics in a way? this is how we fall, heartbreak for hire, and more than tomorrow have some lines i plucked out of my fave quotes or posts.

Favourite opening lines:

i don't particularly like any of my opening lines tbh but here you go

[the regular dilemma]

hyunjae as comedic relief as always

“Social media is a disease, Y/N,” Hyunjae says, trying to grab your phone out of your hands. “Tell me, have you ever seen anything good being posted online? They just feed you brain-rotting posts that will reduce your IQ a little each time.”

[not cute]

i got called out for always starting with dialogue, which is true only about half the time though

“So is he the one?” Eric whispers excitedly, tilting his head over at where Juyeon stood behind the counter. The barista seems to be busying himself with something, and you could only hope that nothing your two loud friends say today would reach his ears. “The cute barista who apparently likes your goat face—”

[bad at being bad]

chan i'm so sorry but ur hilarious in this fic

“He’s so good looking,” a voice says, pulling you out of your thoughts. “Like, so good looking.”

Favourite closing lines:

[this is how we fall]

hands down my all time favourite closing lines. they tie up all loose ends of the fic and close it so nicely AND could also be up to interpretation. also i get shivers every time an author weaves the title into the story so that's kind of what i did here.

Now you don't have to look into his future to know that all the scenes you'd seen were about you. Now you can picture it—Sunwoo looking up from your laced hands on the table and seeing your smile, face no longer out of focus. Pulling away from your kiss in the orchard has you seeing your own gaze, surprised but content. And then there's this very moment when you see yourself in Sunwoo's eyes and you just know.

This is how you fall in love.

Favourite lines from anywhere:

[you look hideous on me]

this one was too funny ok

The most you give him is your name, so that he might stop calling you by the S-word that you’ve come to hate so much. Though now you’re not so sure if the S-word is soulmate, Sunwoo, or skater boy.

[more than tomorrow]

i might cry again

And this time, you understand him. It wasn’t more than yesterday and less than tomorrow like he’d always said. Love in itself is something greater than all of the tomorrows that had been promised to you, and all of the tomorrows that had been robbed from him. Because even when tomorrow comes and the tomorrow after that, it will still silently sit on your shoulders and slip out with each tear and rest between the pages of a book left incomplete too soon.

[sangyeon wip]

lot of nice lines in this one but yknow i might never finish it or post it so just throwing it here i guess. posted something else from this au for a wip wednesday once upon a time tho

But sometimes love is the warmth of sunlight on your face, streaming through the windows of a place you call home. Sometimes it smiles at you fondly in the mornings and sometimes it takes you by the hand to guide you gently to the barstool in the kitchen. Sometimes love simply looks at you like you are exactly where you belong.

Scenes from anywhere you would have choose to have illustrated:

the first slow dancing scene from this is how we fall or the rooftop scene (fake stargazing!!!) from you look hideous on me!!

New year’s resolutions:

should probably be writing less and exercising more tbh HAHAHA. but uhh i guess i'll try to get back to writing self indulgent stuff!!

Word Count Totals

Total finished, posted fic: 105,135

i think it's actually ~111,200 if you count the things on my mlist but some of the things i posted this year were written in previous years so i didn't count those

Longest posted fic: this is how we fall - 16.9k

Longest wip: my 15.5k sangyeon wip that still isn't close to being done HAHA. maybe in 2022 :')

Total number of words written: 151,269

#personal #fic summary 2021 #sherri.txt #<- gonna attempt at keeping this blog organized.... hah...#anyway not gonna tag anyone but if ur a writer feel free to do it!!#also i'd much rather know what ur fav fic of mine is !!!

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sammysdewysensitiveeyes · 4 years ago

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Once again, I’ve done that thing where I get progressively more annoyed the more I think about a scene in a comic book (yes, this blog really deals with the important, hard-hitting issues), and that’s how I now feel about this scene.

Under a cut, because I have too many thoughts.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that Pyro is getting some small taste of character development, and maybe the beginnings of a redemption arc. I’m all for that! I appreciate this line being in there. But it’s clunky dialogue for both Iceman and Pyro, and for Pyro, especially, it comes out of nowhere. Bobby has at least had some build in in earlier issues showing that he’s starting to become more vicious, especially the scene in Savage Avengers (during King in Black) and his revenge-for-Kate maiming of the soldier.

There has been no indication up until now that Pyro has any kind of regret over his past actions (at least not in Marauders, although he did show back regret when he was dying of Legacy), or that he’s starting to learn some kind of “better way” from the X-Men. There have been no little suggestions of Pyro starting to embrace the Marauders’ mission, or to start to realize that you don’t have to kill people to win. (He does say that in the Storm-centered issue, while relating a flashback of something that we didn’t actually see happen in the books originally). Pyro has just been bopping along with the group, merrily burning things and getting into fights and drinking, and he suddenly announces that he’s been rethinking his old ways. It’s actually kind of odd that Marauders is the group that leads Pyro down this path, because they are generally more vicious than X-Men usually are – you’ve got Lockheed maiming people, and Kate solidifying a rifle through two soldier’s legs. In fact, given the maimed soldiers coming after them as new Reavers, and Verendi continuing to cause trouble, I’d expect Pyro to be arguing that mercy doesn’t actually work – their enemies keep coming back strong than ever.

So I don’t know where Pyro’s change of heart is actually coming from? It’s like this character development has been happening in the background, and Duggan suddenly gave us a little glimpse of it, rather than actually showing the readers what’s been happening the entire time. Like I half expect Pyro to also suddenly announced that he, Iceman and Bishop are now in a three-way poly relationship, and also they all helped Shinobi deal with his father issues while beating up Fenris, so that’s why Shinobi is so friendly and cooperative with the group. You didn’t actually get to see it happen on panel, but trust me, it happened!

And the idea of Pyro and Iceman on opposite character arcs, with Bobby becoming more aggressive and no longer holding back, while St. John learns restraint, is potentially very interesting! But we’ve barely seen any of this in action. As I’ve said before, Pyro’s supposed role as the loose cannon of the group is mostly an informed trait, he hasn’t really been shown getting out of control or crossing the line. It would have been interesting to contrast Bobby and Pyro’s different fighting styles, to show how they are rubbing off on each other (yes, innuendo intended).

Actually, I have a whole list of little ways that Duggan could have seeded Pyro’s “redemption arc” far in advance, so that he doesn’t just awkwardly blurt out things like “I think this group is bringing out the best in me.”:

- Pyro actually getting out of control in battle and having to be reined in, not just being frequently reminded of the “no kill” rule. Obviously he couldn’t step too far out of the line without being kicked off the team, but something like Pyro starting to indiscriminantly torch a building, only for Emma to stop him because she senses that there are civilians hiding inside. Then Emma can mentally yell at him for being careless. Pyro maybe reflects and feels a little bad, because he will happily kill the hell out of soldiers, but he doesn’t want to accidentally kill bystanders.

- Storm (or even Callisto) having a “talk” with Pyro about restraint, and how he can work more effectively in battle by using his fire to carefully target enemies rather than just flame-throwing all over the place (although sometimes his “shock and awe” method works, too).

- Someone like Emma or Bishop actually talking to Pyro about his tendency to jump straight to “kill” when he’s angry. When Pyro wants to kill Yellowjacket and burn the Verendi kids, he just comically dismissed by both Magneto and Emma. It would have been interesting to have someone actually talk to him about it. I’m not looking for a therapy session, but something like Bishop pointing out that leaving Yellowjacket alive to “escape” will be more effective in the long run, etc. etc. Instead Emma just leaves Pyro standing there, just to reiterate how unimportant he is in this book.

- More contrast between Bobby and Pyro’s fighting styles, especially near the start of the book, with Pyro obviously more vicious and aggressive, while Bobby is holding back. Maybe have let the boys talk about the use of violence, and whether it is justified. This doesn’t have to take up much room, it could be like one page of after-battle discussion, or even little comments during battle. Then we could also see their styles gradually change as they come to like and respect each other.

- Pyro actually having to face some of the horrifically burned victims that he has maimed (or family members of those that he has killed). I know the Reaver confronting Bobby was part of Duggan’s “Bobby is turning into a badass” arc, but I think it would have been meaningful to have one of the Reavers be a soldier that Pyro has burned. (In fact, none of the Reavers seemed to be soldiers that Pyro, specifically, had injured, which is odd given his status as the supposed “violent loose cannon” of the group.) Duggan could have actually done both, and contrasted Bobby and Pyro’s reactions. Bobby is defiant at maiming a soldier that he thinks had a hand in killing Kate. Pyro is confronted by a soldier that he burned (maybe while the soldier was even trying to surrender or run away), and reflects that he may have gone too far.

- Pyro giving some indication that he is starting to care about the Marauders’ mission beyond just a job, and a fun excuse to drink and fight. You’d think Pyro might have some warm fuzzy feelings about delivering medicine to people, given his slow, painful death from illness. And maybe feeling empathy for sick humans would show Pyro that he can feel some greater empathy for humans in general. We do see Pyro put a comforting arm around Proteus when the Moira McTaggert hospital is unveiled in Madripoor, so I’ll give Duggan that (even if that gesture also feels like it came out of nowhere).

- Pyro receiving praise from people that he has rescued, and basking in the attention. Pyro has in the past been written as a show-boating attention hog (and Duggan even reflects that in his “funny” fantasy of Pyro being greeted by an adoring crowd on Krakoa, not that I think Duggan actually put the research in). During his Freedom Force days, Pyro seemed to get into the idea of being a “hero,” and is very cocky and cheerful when saving Longshot and some kids from a dinosaur. I think Pyro likes being perceived as a hero, and getting attention, even if he isn’t really a very heroic person. So show Pyro getting thanked by a mutant child or a little old lady that he’s saved. Show Pyro feeling touched and gratified by that, since he spent so long as a bad guy.

- Pyro talking about saving Senator Kelly. Does he regret it? Does he stand by his actions? Is he completely disillusioned by Kelly’s death shortly afterwards? Or is he happy that he at least managed to change Kelly’s mind. Pyro probably wouldn’t bring it up himself, but I’m surprised that no X-Men have said anything to him about it.

- Pyro talking to his old Brotherhood pals about his experience on the Marauder, maybe showing how his way of thinking is changing, arguing that the X-Men aren’t so bad, and that their “non-violence” can actually get things done.

This sounds like a lot, but even a few little moments or bits of dialogue could have gotten slipped into fight scenes to build up to Pyro’s changing attitude, rather than just have him announce it out of nowhere.

Of course, the series isn’t finished. Duggan might have some really interesting development planned for Pyro in future issues! But I hope that if he does, it’s actually seeded early on and develops organically, rather than coming out of nowhere. 21 issues in, I’m not optimistic. The sad thing is, I like some of the “funny” things that Duggan has done with Pyro. I like him gambling with Bishop, Shinobi and Bobby at the Gala. I like his bet with Storm. I even like him biting Batroc. I just wish he would treat the character as something other than an afterthought, and I wish we saw more of Bobby and Pyro’s newfound friendship and development, because it could be genuinely interesting if they actually got some proper time in the spotlight!

In conclusion, I should change my URL to @constantlysaltyaboutmarauders, because that’s all I talk about these days.

#pyro #st john allerdyce

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joshslater · 5 years ago

Text

Five Step Program

Similar stories and bonus material on my Patreon.

I stared at the contents of the envelope, a blue jockstrap, and a folded piece of paper. I hadn’t put much hope into this “miracle solution” to becoming a jock without any of the work. Of course there was a catch. “First 20 customers get their first shipment free of charge” was enough for me to fill out the form with my information. It wasn’t anything too revealing. Name, address, height, weight, age. A box where you could write what you hoped to achieve with this revolutionary five step program. That’s what they really were after, I guessed. Having people enter their dreams so that they can tailor their next scam better. I was even surprised I got anything in the mail at all, and now having opened it, it made even more sense.

I could see how sending a jockstrap to someone perhaps fulfills some legal requirement that the recipient could now look like a jock. It could be a way to avoid getting a federal fraud charge. But I hadn’t spent a dime on this, so it didn’t make any sense. The jockstrap looked like any other jockstrap, I guessed. I’d never owned one, nor worn one. The pouch was dark blue and made with two layers of some synthetic mesh material. The big waistband was light blue with the letters JOCK repeated in dark blue around it. There was a faint smell of synthetic material and detergent. I did a mental sigh and opened the folded letter.

Congratulation on becoming one of our first customers on the revolutionizing five step Jock Express program. As a thank you for signing up, this first part is totally free of charge. Should you wish to continue the program, as we are confident you will after having successfully completed the first session, simply use the URL at the bottom of this page to enter your credit card information and we’ll send you the next item as soon as the payment is confirmed. I’m happy to inform you that we can offer a reduced price for the entire program, should you chose to start it within five days. The price is only $100 for the next installment, and progressively higher as you advance in the program. There is no commitment to purchase so you can stop the program at any point. We’re confident you will want to complete all the five steps in the Jock Express program.

Fuck that! What morons sign up to this kind of shit?

Instructions: The Jock Express is the easiest and most user friendly fitness program ever developed. Simply drink a lot of water, put on the items included in each program step, as you normally would, and go to sleep.

I was even more confused. Why would that sway anyone to put out $100 for at best another piece of gym clothing? I put it all in my in-tray on my desk and let it slip from my mind. I had dinner, watched TV, answered some late emails and the usual Tuesday stuff. By bedtime I walked past my home office and had the sudden recollection that I had something waiting in the in-tray. Then I remembered what it was, and almost reluctantly decided to go ahead with wearing the damn thing. I was still convinced it was a scam, but was immensely curious to exactly how it would work. If nothing else I would get to feel what wearing a jockstrap feels like. I drank a glass of water, put on the jockstrap, and went to bed. The jockstrap was as comfortable as anything and I quickly went to sleep.

Apparently I slept through the first alarm, and jolted awake on hearing the more incessant buzz from the phone. I jumped out of bed and it wasn’t until halfway to the bathroom I realized I was naked. I wouldn’t say massive, as in cartoonish in any way, but my dick and balls were noticeably bigger than before. It took a few seconds for my still startled brain to put the pieces together. The jockstrap had disappeared and somehow affected the body. It hadn’t replaced any body parts, I could still recognize my dick, but it was for sure altered. Suddenly $100 felt like way too little money. I didn’t even put any pants on as I typed in the URL from the letter. Jock Express step #2 for $100 and express delivery for another $25. Annoyingly no option to order all four remaining steps as a package. I just wanted to have them all in my house as soon as possible.

By the time I had entered all my details, checked all the boxes, and clicked the final webshop button I was rocking a massive hard-on. The biggest one in my life so far, by far. I didn’t care right then if I would come late or call in sick, I just knew that I had to take my pre-cum leaking enhancement for a test drive, and slowly started to move my hand up and down the shaft. It felt better than ever, and lasted longer than I have ever before. I’m not really sure how long, because I zoned out a bit while wanking, and then exploded with an epic load of cum. I managed to tilt the chair back and catch it all on my body, but then I felt really spent and dozed off, only to be brought back with a text message from my boss. Sick day it is, I decided.

A more apt description would be a lewd day. I just cycled between laptop porn, wanking and showers, and combinations thereof. I loved the difference it made when wearing underwear. Even when flaccid you could tell here was action waiting, not just only wearing underwear, but while wearing jeans too. I took photos so I had progress photos to compare with.

The next day was a strange one. I worked all day in the glow of someone with confidence, as if somehow I had done some achievement. I kind of surprised myself with how much of a difference it made when dealing with the pileup of emails from yesterday. Big dick energy. I could make decisions so much faster than I was used to. I don’t know if I really had more confidence, or just didn’t care as much. I was for sure giddy with anticipation of what was yet to come by overnight delivery. I forced myself to stay until official end of office hours and then bolted and drove straight home.

Thank God there was a DHL box in my mailbox, or I don’t know what I would have done. I opened it on my way in, and it’s contents were similar to the first one. A folded letter and some folded cloth. Without opening the letter I unfolded the cloth, which turned out to be a plain, sleeveless, white cotton T-shirt. Had there been someone to high five, I would have done so. I’m not fat, but there is a bit of flabbiness I would love to get rid of, so I couldn’t wait for this part. I felt anticipation in my stomach and something else in my pants. I hadn’t had a wank since this morning.

Evening couldn’t come soon enough. The letter said basically the same as the last one. A new URL for the $400 Jock Express #3, which I immediately ordered, again with overnight shipping. Not really sure what to kill time with, I figured a jock would watch sport, so I just randomly put some football on. I hadn’t really paid any attention to sports before, so I wasn’t sure about who was who, what the series looked like, or really what happened on the field besides the obvious. I ended up masturbating to the football, which in my opinion made it better. By 9:30 I decided to drink a few glasses of water, strip, put on the sleeveless T-shirt, and go to bed. I tossed and turned in anticipation for quite a while. The T-shirt had a very loose fit, and the big holes for the arms made it even more mobile, though it was anchored by the crew neck. Finally at some point I managed to fall asleep.

I woke up before the alarm. It was dark enough that I knew I hadn’t slept through them all. Instead of getting up or turning on the light, I just slowly moved my hand to my chest under the sheet. My chest was about the same size, but felt firmer, I imagined. But more importantly I was naked and the shirt was gone. I moved my hand down and couldn’t contain my joy when I started to feel the faint square of abs. I jumped out of bed and ran into the bathroom to have a look in the mirror. The effect was better than I thought from just touch. My torso not only looked fit as a model, with abs and V and all, but younger and with better skin. Perhaps an illusion, but it almost looked like my dick was bigger as well.

Having woken up early, after a wank and a shower, I was one of the first in at the office and quickly got ahead on my tasks for the day. I still had the anticipation I felt yesterday, but today it was more like I knew what to expect. It wasn’t just a one-off or a fluke, this was legit and it was happening. As I started early I decided to flex out early and rush back home. I spent the drive home fantasizing about different types of clothing. I was kind of wishing for those sleeves they use in basket, to amp up my arms, but there might be some scientific reason why they changed the body parts in a specific order. Who was I kidding? This wasn’t science. This was magic.

I ripped open the familiar package as soon as I was inside the front door. This time it was white under armour legging of some sort, ending just below the knees. I was considering strip down fully naked and put on the leggings right then and there, and wear them until it was time to go to bed, but decided against it. Even though the descriptions were vague and didn’t really say you couldn’t do that, I didn’t want to risk fucking up the process. Instead I found some underwear in the same color as the jockstrap and took a pair of scissors to an old white T-shirt to make it look like the one I put on yesterday. Then I put on those, and nothing but, and sat myself in front of the TV, determined to actually try to follow the game this time, whichever game I happened to see.

It might be I imagined it, perhaps because I’ve never really seen myself in a sleeveless T-shirt before, but it looked to me like my arms were a bit more defined than yesterday. I realized that I had just assumed only the parts under the clothes are affected, but that’s just something I made up. It could be that it just primarily acts under the clothes, or perhaps it was just a coincidence and the clothes really could change anything. In the end I let it go. It didn’t matter, I couldn’t prove it either way, and I couldn’t watch a game, have deep thoughts and masturbate all at the same time anyway. I was so into it I almost forgot to order the next package. A steep $1000 for whatever the next item was, but so far it was fucking worth it.

I really liked how I looked in the 3/4 leggings or whatever the fuck they are called. Just imagining how much better I would look the morning after made me go to bed with a big boner, despite being thoroughly wanked. I tried to calm myself by thinking of the last game I watched, and not give Jock Express a thought, and it kind of worked. I know I fell asleep pretty quickly and dreamt of football until the alarm woke me up.

“Fuck yeah!” was the first I could think when I saw myself. The thighs were about as large as before, but the line going down them made it obvious they were muscles and not jiggle matter. It even felt different just standing. I’m almost positive my dick had grown even more. Who the hell wouldn’t dish out $400 or whatever for this shit?

While the day started great it quickly became frustrating with all the corporate bullshit. I knew how to do my job. There were just so many fucking rules in the way of doing it in the best way. Perhaps the anticipation of the second to last package made me be in a bad mood. Whatever. I bolted as soon as I could, cranked up the volume in the car, trying to not think of anything until I got home. I almost punched something when I opened the mailbox and didn’t find an envelope. Instead it was just a note about DHL attempted to deliver while I wasn’t home. I could either call them to deliver tomorrow or drive to a pickup point. Like fuck I would wait another full fucking day.

I was furious when I got back into the car, blasting music as loud as I could, but I quickly calmed down. Perhaps this was a good thing? It might be a box with shoulder pads from football or hockey or lacrosse or whatever the fuck else looks hot. You know what else is hot? Michael at the DHL pickup point. I mean, I’m not homo or anything, I’m just saying he was a good looking dude.

The packet he gave me was a bit disappointing though. No way it could contain anything as large as shoulder pads. I didn’t want to fuck with my mojo, so I kept the same routine as before and didn’t open it until back home. Fucking cleats and socks. Another fucking leg day. And they smelled bad too, like distilled vinegar or some shit. As I entered the URL from the letter on my phone I got two more shocks. The price of the last package was ten thousand fucking dollars! And even worse, the delivery wouldn’t arrive until Monday. Two fucking days away. “This is bullshit” I shouted at nobody and threw the empty cardboard box into the wall to no damage to either.

I was still furious and went straight to the fridge, pulled out a cold can of beer, opened it, and downed half of it. It felt better, but I was still upset on the world in general. I looked at the phone screen again. $10k is a fuckton of money. There wasn’t a rush to buy it right now either, if they didn’t do overnight delivery during weekends. I emptied the can and crushed it against the countertop. It hurt my hand, which just added to my anger for being such a weakling. I pulled the rest of the six-pack out of the fridge and threw it in the living room couch on my way to the bedroom. I needed to get out of these stuffy office clothes and cool down with a cold one, or four.

I ripped off the tie and started to unbutton the shirt on my way into the bedroom, and once there opened the door to my wardrobe. I felt like a girl, not knowing what to wear. I hated everything my eyes fell on, and I hated feeling like that. I bunched the shirt into a ball and threw it into a corner, together with the tie. I climbed out of the pants as quickly as I could and threw them there as well. Then I stopped myself.

Everything I saw I really liked, I realized. The pecs, the abs, the thighs, and the generous bulge in the boxer briefs.I yanked off my socks and more deliberately lowered my boxers to let the dick and balls loose. I knew what I wanted from this junk selection of clothes, and opened a drawer with my athletic clothes and pulled out a pair of grey sweatpants. It was Friday and my dick and balls deserved some freedom, I thought, as I put on the sweats without any underwear. I picked up the sleeveless T-shirt from the floor by the bed and put that on as well. I felt so much better. A few beers, whatever game was on, and some more wanking, and perhaps this could turn into a good evening after all.

After two more beers, cum stains on sweatpants, T-shirt and the couch, and fuck knows how many games I zapped through I couldn’t wait any longer. Whatever bullshit the cleats and sock did, the sooner it was over with, the sooner I could move on with the final package. $10k was still a lot, but if I sold all shares I could buy it, keeping both house and car.

The socks went almost up to the knees, but weren’t any real soccer socks or anything like that. The looked more like something someone might have to the gym, or something a skater would wear. Skater was perhaps right, because they smelled like that vinegary acidic smell of really sweaty skater shoes. The socks were white with a wide black band around it near the top, and were a bit off-white on contact surfaces around the foot, as if they had been used in black shoes by someone. As if I would fucking care. I pulled up both legs of the sweats over the knees and put on both socks, pulling them as high as possible. The cleats were black and a bit banged up, but fit perfectly on my feet. I didn’t even remember having given out my shoe size. I was unsure how tight to tie them, so I went with comfortable without being loose.

It felt weird walking with them, like the shoes were pushing your forward. Not at all like my much flatter leather shoes. Somehow my test walking ended up by the fridge, so I grabbed another six-pack and returned to the couch for some more ESPN or whatever.

I had no idea what sport it was on the screen, but glancing out the window I could see that it wasn’t evening anymore. I must have fallen asleep, I realized, but I felt way better than I ought to, given the pile of crushed beer cans around me. I walked to the toilet to have a piss, and it wasn’t until I lowered the front of my sweatpants to grab my morning semi-stiff snake I realized I was barefoot. I was pissing for probably a good minute, aiming down with one hand. Holy fuck so much I’ve kept in while sleeping. I was pretty sure I had cleats and socks on when I fell asleep. I did a few bounces on the balls of the feet. It felt fucking great, and shook loose the last drops of piss from my dick. I dropped it back into the sweatpants, and broke into a smile from how fucking huge of a tent it made, despite being just a semi. I did a few more jumps, looking at how the flagpole in my front swung up and down. I really didn’t deserve to feel this great after yesterday, but I’d fucking take it. I felt so full of energy I felt I could do anything. I wanted to run just to see how it would feel.

I dashed into my bedroom and emptied the rest of the athletic clothes drawer on the floor. Some T-shirts, a pair of basket shorts, white socks and wiped down indoor and outdoor shoes. All of it was underwhelming, outright disappointing. And why the fuck did I keep the shoes here and not by the door? I grabbed the outdoor shoes and without bothering with socks started to mash my foot into it. It was clearly at least one size too small, perhaps several. Who the fucks know how shoe sizes work. I threw both shoes into the wall above my pile of office clothes. Fucking hell. Why do all days start out great and then go downhill so fast, I wondered.

I grabbed a pair of flip flops, the car keys, and pulled the credit card out of the wallet and walked out to the car. The car stereo startled me when I turned the ignition key, as it blared out some hip hop at max volume. I reached to turn it down, but changed my mind. It felt like my mood, as I was driving to my closest mall almost below speed limit. There wasn’t much traffic out anyway on a Saturday morning. As I turned into the almost empty parking lot in front of the mall I realized the fucking God damn shit mall would open for another 40-something fucking minutes. I wished I could turn up the music louder.

As I looked down on the cum stains on my shirt and tenting sweats I decided why the fuck not, and started to beat off in sync with the music.

40-something fucking minutes later I entered the sporting goods store in the mall. Johnson’s or Dick’s or Willy’s or whatever, I don’t care. I picked up some proper compression clothes, like the leggings I had earlier with a matching top. I got myself some outdoor Nike’s, a few proper tanks, some jocks, boxer shorts and socks, new flip flops, and a snapback cap. On the way to the cashier I decided to pick up a wooden baseball bat and a regulation size football as well. Back in the car I ripped off all the stickers and shit and put on something I could run in. The sneakers, jockstrap and shorts, a tank top, and the snapback. I left the car and just ran.

It was a revelation. The first time I tasted ice cream or coca cola, or the first time I discovered I could do something else with my dick besides peeing and hitting it too hard. I felt like a good damn terminator. Like as long as I kept the pace below sprinting I could run for hours. Trickles of sweat running down my face, my arms, my back, wetting the fabric of my clothes where it could, cooling the skin with the breeze my motion generated where it couldn’t. I have no fucking idea how long I actually run. When I finally ended up back in the car I was steaming and real fucking hungry.

I felt like a shower was in order, but I was too hungry to do that first. I went by Five Guys and had a bacon cheeseburger with fries and a peanut butter milkshake. As I started eating I realized I wasn’t anywhere near tired. It was probably enough running for today, but I wanted to do more. Halfway through the meal I decided I would visit the gym we had a company membership at. I had only been there a few times since the introduction walkthrough. I wasn’t even sure I had the card in my wallet anymore, or if it was in the bowl of stuff in the kitchen.

I made a quick stop at home, unloaded my car, found the card, and set off to the Pacific Wellness Center. The dude in the lobby had a pissy attitude and asked me if I was wearing indoor shoes. I asked him what they looked like, and he let me in. Such a shame, because he was kind of good looking.

Inside the gym the results were mixed. Squats, lunges, planking, and abductor machine all went excellent. It was fun, even. But everything involving arms went miserably. I could only lift a pathetic load, and after a few reps I would be tired. I even embarrassed myself in front of two massive gym buddies. One of them had amazing arms. You could see how strong they were even when he wasn’t lifting, but fuck me what beautiful ‘ceps when loaded. And tanned too. It was lucky I had the jockstrap on, because that body was smoking hot.

I could only stand a few more failures after that and then sped back home, still with hip hop at max, in a mix of emotions. I got naked on the way to the bathroom, and there I spent perhaps an hour in the shower, getting the grime and sweat off me, and wanking twice, thinking of the arms of the hot dude. As I dried myself on a towel I knew I had to buy the last package. Ten fucking thousand fucking dollars. I had to use the laptop to access my bank, and once I had put in the sell order for my stock portfolio I saw the pornhub tabs I hadn’t looked at since Wednesday.

The big-busted bimbos I had wanked my way through the Wednesday suddenly didn’t seem as interesting. I clicked around a bit until I found a muscle stud fucking a Latino girl. How quickly the taste can change, but except for pathetic arms, I’m was now the muscle stud. I quickly entered the URL from the Jock Express #4 box and ordered the last package. The delivery date was still Monday, so come Tuesday the muscle stud would be me. Only one fucking week.

Since I was out of beer I threw on my old shorts and a T-shirt, and had a walk to my nearest convenience store and bought one six-pack for each hand. I was feeling a bit stiff from the training, but it was much better than it ought to be.

As I opened the door back at home the warm smell of gym clothes, sweat, and feet hit me. I did the responsible thing and threw everything in the washing machine, opened a beer, and started to watch whatever was on.

Sunday was just a boring-ass filler day. I woke up at a decent time, had a long run. I passed through the park, but didn’t engage with any of the groups playing football or beach volley there. I could wait two more days to get my arms sorted. I did some cleaning up and domestic shit back home. Then I went to the gym again, but this time I pretended it was leg day, so I didn’t have to embarrass myself. After dinner I had an evening jog as well, and only had a few beers before bedtime.

Same thing on Monday. Woke up pretty early and went for a long run. When I was almost back home I got a text message from my boss, saying we needed to talk about my performance over the last few days. My answer “Suck my balls” probably summed up the conversation much better than any in-person meeting. I found that the best way to find porn with muscle studs in them was to search in the gay section. Just because you like to watch big arms and strong backs doesn’t make you homo. I jacked off to the videos until it was time to eat lunch. By 2 pm I was climbing on the fucking walls in anticipation, and every minute felt like too long. Perhaps it wouldn’t arrive today at all? I heard the mailman at 2:18 and rushed out wearing only shorts and snapback.

The mailbox was stuffed full with a big, soft envelope. I tore it open on my way back inside, kicked the door shut, and emptied the contents on my kitchen table. A big black something fell out, as well as something small that rattled across the table. Ignoring the letters, as usual, I unfolded the cloth. It was a big, black hoodie in sweatshirt material, with the print “STRONG” on the front. Finally arms! I picked up the small plastic box that almost fell off the table and opened it. It contained some sort of advanced mouthguard mad in blue, white, and transparent plastic of different hardness and flex. The kind that football players use.

Not knowing what to do next, I went to the gym and spent a few hours just randomly doing low weight, high rep stuff. I was trying to catch a glimpse of everyone else who worked out to see what their arms and legs looked like. Once I felt it was too obvious I wasn’t doing anything serious I drove home, but instead of going inside I started to walk and walked for hours just looking. It felt good just to be in motion. I didn’t return back until the sun started to set, and it was almost fully dark when I walked through the door.

I decided to just go ahead with the last piece of transformation. I stepped out of my sneakers and pulled off my damp socks. It didn’t smell of strawberries. I pulled off the T-shirt and stepped out of the basket shorts, but kept the compression shorts on. I grabbed the hoodie from the table and put it over my head. Perhaps it was me, but it smelled of musky sweat inside while I put it on. I poured myself a big glass of water and downed it.

I walked with the small plastic box to the bathroom and had a look in the mirror. I didn’t really look that different. The big hoodie hid my newly athletic front. The legs and feet looked strong, but who ever notices that? My big bulge in the compression pants was however a change from the past week that couldn’t easily be hidden. I opened the box and put the mouthguard into my mouth. It fit snugly and didn’t change my appearance much either. Not knowing what to do with the hoodie I put it up over my head and pulled it tighter with the drawstrings so all but my face was gone. Then I turned off all the lights and went to bed.

It was still dark when I woke up. Instantly I knew it had worked, because I couldn’t feel the mouthguard in my mouth, though it felt different. As if the ghost of the mouthguard was still there, prying my mouth open. I felt some sort of pressure on my head, as if I was wearing a hat or a beanie or something. I was about to feel my head when I realized moving my arm felt different. Not wanting to fuck around any longer I went straight to the bathroom again to have a look in the mirror. I stared at my reflection with open mouth. The difference was breathtaking.

First of all I wasn’t wearing any top, so my abs and pecs were on full display, but they were also bigger than before. Everything was bigger. My shoulders were much bigger, my entire upper body looked wider than before, and everything about the arms were huge. My face was still my face, but there were lots of small changes. “Fucking dope” I said with a much deeper voice than what I had before. I smiled a smirk and flexed the arms in different poses. I couldn't wait to show up at the gym doing an arm day. I just needed to have another shower. My dick needed service, and I felt sluggish, as if I hadn't really wakened up yet.

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taeminie · 4 years ago

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tag game 🌈

i was tagged by the lovely doreen ( @gunsatthaphan ) to answer these questions. 🥰💜

1. why did you choose your url?

i love win metawin. simple. my previous url like very early on was sarawatined and then i went to metawwin then i removed the w. hehe

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.

i always considered making one (i got lazy) but then i realized that this blog is my personality and i like having one blog for all my interests and likes bc it represents my brain lmao and i’m aware it’s a mess but i love it.

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

i made this blog on april last year but i’ve been on tumblr since october 2009 so i’ve seen it all.

4. do you have a queue tag?

nope! i prefer scheduling posts tbh.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

the main reason was 2gether. i made it during the final eps and i just remember seeing everything on my dash and being so fascinated bc it was my hyperfixation at that time. my friend angel had made a blog and i was hesitant to come back to tumblr at first bc my prev. blog got hacked and deleted and it was a scary experience for me. but i ended up doing it and i was super happy. also, i started watching thai dramas like around 2016 so it was nice to find all these dramas on tumblr again and even new ones afterwards.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

she’s my wife 💍 (that CK shoot.... man. i edited it on photoshop and idk i like how it turned out and i really like the bg color. and how she’s holding a film camera as in to represent all the dramas i watch ;) or smth like that)

7. why did you choose your header?

well i love brightwin, they were a huge part of the reason i made this blog so i like having a win url and a bright layout and technically when i had a twitter i had a bright username so they just complemented each other. 💕

8. what‘s your post with the most notes?

gay wat. happy pride folks 🌈

9. how many mutuals do you have?

well i think everyone i follow follows me back with some exceptions so over 100+

10. how many followers do you have?

too many for so little time that i’ve been here. *blows a kiss* thank u so much. 🥺

11. how many people do you follow?

163.

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

if my random text posts that i end up deleting count as that then... yes

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

daily on the app. it makes everything so much easier. on my laptop, maybe 3/4 times a week. but a lot overall.

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

no pls i hope that never happens fjdkkdkdk i’m here for love and from love. thx

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this‘ posts

oh. very guilt trippy. i found that sometimes posts can be triggering or ppl are just not in the right mindset to reblog/interact. you are not a terrible person for scrolling past a post. pls dont let anyone tell u otherwise.

16. do you like tag games?

love them!!! but sometimes they get lost in my notifs and i don’t see them when someone tags me :( i’m gonna try to do more of them when i can.

17. do you like ask games?

yessss i love getting asks it makes me so excited like ppl care wow

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

idk by definition. but a lot have been around way longer than me and make content for so many different fandoms as well so they’re more known as well.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

i have crushes on ppl every single day and then do nothing about it. (but yes 😏)

20. tags?

this was so much fun to do. thanks for tagging me angel @gunsatthaphan 💜💜💜💜💜💜

i’m tagging: @earthmixs @jaehwany @brightwin @phapundao @theghostvalley @ataleofthousandstars @lastwilight @itoldsunset @kaonoppakao @uppoompat @yesdramas & @scrubbfantine have fun!!!! (only if u want to)

#tag game #☺️☺️☺️#text

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thedeviltohisangel · 4 years ago

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The Only Good I’ve Ever Done

During the five years he was blipped away, he thought about the snippets of his life that he would miss the most. The moments that he never appreciated enough. The moments that were so fleeting that he never got to expound upon. Plenty of them involved his family. Times on the fishing boat that he didn’t realize would keep him alive in his adult years. Holding his nephews for the first time and learning there was so much more to life and legacy. But so many also involved her.

masterlist is my url/writing

accepting requests for this pairing

There were a few things about Louisiana that Sam knew would never change. They would always have the best seafood. His sister and nephews would always be there. And he would always hold his breath waiting to run into Leila.

They kept in contact while he was deployed. Spotty phone calls and fuzzy video calls sustained them but Sam cherished the letters she sent him more than anything. It was as if each stroke of her pen captured a bit of her heart that she sent away to be with him. Everyone teased him about how he was whipped for this girl. Asked him why he came out to this hellscape if he had such a beautiful woman at home waiting for him. He never answered because he didn’t think they would get it. He was here because he had a lot to prove. Prove to his parents that he could be responsible and mature. Prove to Leila and her family that he could keep her safe and provide for her. Prove to himself he deserved her.

When he was selected for the Falcon program, their communication slowed and slowed until it stopped altogether. He was pulling long hours and participating in highly classified missions and he didn’t know how to balance it. Leila still sent him letters even though he stopped writing back. He read them and felt numb. After so long, she stopped writing too. Every stroke of her pen broke her heart. She didn’t have anything left to give. She stopped visiting his sister and parents. Stopped looking at the houses for sale in the paper. Stopped looking at the bridal magazines in the waiting area of the doctor’s office. Her mom told her that sometimes people grow apart. Tried to help her rationalize Sam’s sudden disinterest. Her father told her that he had been right all along. That Sam was just some boy, not ready to be a man. That she deserved better. Leila held onto the hope that when he came back, she could look him in the eyes and talk to him and everything would be better. That they just needed to see each other again and it would all be okay. He would be hers again.

But his end date came and went. She heard nothing from him. Didn’t see him around town. When she found the courage to ask Sarah, she broke the news Sam wasn’t moving back to Louisiana. And she felt the nail in the coffin go right through her chest.

Sam thought about her when he watched Riley fall from the sky. Thought about her when he jumped out of the building in DC. Thought about her when he was locked in a cell on the Raft. He thought of her when he was snapped away and when he was snapped back and he had never known just how temporary life was than he did in those five years.

And now he stood on a dock in Louisiana and there were seagulls and old friends and she was there. She was smiling and laughing and he didn’t even know how to say hello to her.

She had heard Sam was back in town. She had been actively avoiding anywhere she thought he might be but there he was. A part of her could have guessed this was where they would ultimately cross paths. His family had so much history here. If there was anywhere for him to feel grounded, it would be at this dock.

It was also very clear that he was not going to come up and talk to her. At least not anytime soon. And if she wanted to have a conversation with him, after the years without one, she would have to be the one to initiate it.

“Hi, Sam Wilson.” There was no use in being nervous about it. No use in beating around the bush or pretending that they didn’t have the history that they did. She no longer held any resentment towards him. There had been too many years since then and too many astronomical events for him to hold her hostage. Since the last time she heard from him, she had loved others and lost others and learned how to grieve and how to cope and why her mother always told her the most important thing to be is resilient.

“Hey. I saw you over there and I was gonna-”

“You weren’t. That’s why I did,” she said with a smile. He was different. She could tell in just the handful of words they had exchanged. But he was still Sam. Maybe just a little rougher around the edges.

“If I didn’t know how to be with you Leila, I certainly don’t know how to be around you now.” He figured she deserved honesty after all these years. Besides, he had lost his chance with her long ago. There was no use in trying to save face or act suaver than he was.

“Well, if you’re here long enough we can try to figure it out. Try to find our inner second graders and go back to the simpler times,” she teased. Sam smiled and felt warm at the thought. Sometimes, people were meant to be in your life. You don’t always know how or why but you know you can’t live fully without them. She was one of those people to him. He was one of those people to her. It’d be worth the awkwardness to find some sense of rhythm and belonging again.

“Okay then let’s start simple. I’m here to work on the boat and brought some stuff for dinner if you have the time.” It sounded easy enough. Harmless enough. Two people catching up. There was a lot of that going around since they all had been snapped back. “Unless there’s someone in your life and doing that would be weird cause all the ladies here would certainly spread that around town.” She looked down at her shoes with a sad smile.

“There is but there isn’t. It’s a long story,” she replied.

“I have a lot of long stories too,” he shared. Without thinking, he reached for her hand and she met him halfway. Just the simple act made her feel safe and secure. Made her feel more protected than she had in years. Like she didn’t need to look over her shoulder in fear because he would be behind her. “Come on.”

She followed him to the old Wilson family boat and stood still for a moment once her feet landed on deck. It had been so long since she had stepped foot on the vessel, years of memories rushing back at her. She found her way down into the galley and smiled as she thought about the times with Sam where they had taken full advantage of the privacy being below deck brought them. As kids they had pretended it was pirate ship. As teenagers it was place to steal kisses and exploring touches. As young adults it had been sharing beers and learning about physical intimacy. “During those five years, Sarah let displaced persons live here. The marina felt like a real community again. Like it did back when we were little.” Leila paused at the corkboard with pictures and let her fingers brush the polaroid of her that was pinned there.

“She hasn’t mentioned that to me,” Sam replied as he emptied the paper bag of food onto the tiny table tucked into the corner.

“I’m sure you’ve both had more than enough to catch up on.” She slid into the chair he pulled out for her and took a nervous sip of a water bottle. “Thanks for the food,” she said with a smile as she popped a piece of shrimp into her mouth.

“It’s your favorite place. It’d be sacrilege to eat it without you.”

“It’s weird. The things you still remember about someone after time apart. The things you didn’t know you remembered until you saw them again.” She avoided his gaze when she looked up and saw how soft his eyes were as they landed on her. He had caused her nothing but pain and heartbreak since she had seen him last. He didn’t deserve her forgiveness. Didn’t deserve a second chance with her heart. Didn’t deserve to look at her like he loved her.

“You said there was someone,” Sam asked, clearing his throat. He couldn’t spend another second with her, falling in love all over again, if there was someone waiting for her at home.

“I was engaged. Pre-blip. He...dusted while we were on vacation. Everyone else came back…” she paused and wiped a tear from her cheek. “I assume he’s happier wherever he is and doesn’t want to come back to me.” In her eyes, it was exactly what Sam had done. Gotten a taste of life without her and decided it was the one he preferred to live. Sam reached for her hand across the table but she pulled it out of his reach.

“I’m sorry.” For what he did or her fiance did, he wasn’t sure.

“Don’t be. I’m tired of everyone feeling sorry for me. I should be used to being alone by now.” She dropped her head into her hands with a sad chuckle. “I didn’t take you up on your offer to be snarky or rehash the past. I’m sorry.”

Now it was his turn. “Don’t be. What I did all those years ago. Not writing you back. Not calling when I got to DC-”

“I can’t relive it, Sam.” It was still too raw. Too real. Too ever present in the back of her mind that she barely survived it the first time, let alone talking it out with him a second time.

“I was scared. Scared of the fact that we had a real future together and real plans and a real chance of making it in this world. I was scared back then and I can’t be scared now. Not anymore.” If he didn’t say what he needed to, wanted to, he would never be able to live with himself. Not with all the loss he had suffered. “And when I watched my partner fall from the sky I was even more scared of not having those things. Of depriving you of your chance to have them. I knew I was committed to a life of service and that there’d be times when I had to put you second and I didn’t want to make that choice.”

“It wasn’t your choice to make. You took that choice away from me,” she responded with a new fire residing inside of her. She had never got the chance to have this fight with Sam. Her spirit had been waiting long enough.

“You’re right. I made the choice to give us a clean break-”

“Clean? Were you high on gunpowder over there?” She slid off the chair angrily and grabbed her purse from where she had tossed it. Her appetite was gone. Her elation at sharing a meal with Sam Wilson was gone.

“Don’t walk away from this. We owe it to ourselves to have this out. End things for good!” he called after her as he followed her onto the deck of the boat.

“I hate you, Sam! I hated you everyday for years and even when others came along I hated you for making it impossible to move on! I hate you for being you and I hate myself even more for still loving you!” she jabbed her finger in his direction then promptly deflated.

“I never hated you, Leila. I never stopped being in love with you.” He wanted to kiss her. Crush her against him and never let her go. Promise her that he was ready to settle down and give her the life they had dreamt about together all those years ago. He took a step and she held up a hand to stop him.

“If you take another step, you have to understand what it means.” Sam grabbed her hand and pressed his lips to her palm. Kissed the tip of every finger and held it to his chest.

“It means I will never break another promise to you. Means you’re my forever and you have my heart for the rest of time. It means I will never put you second ever again and will spend the rest of my days earning your trust and forgiveness.” She stepped forward but kept her hand right where it was.

“Kiss me,” she whispered. And he did. It was softer than the reunion kisses of his dreams. His fingers were threaded in her hair, her eyelashes brushing against the top of his cheekbones as she leaned against him to try and get closer, closer, closer. Her hands were softer against his cheeks than he thinks he deserves. They held him with care. A delicate nature that had been removed from his life since the last time he held her like this. Leila’s toes stretched her upwards until Sam read her cue and gripped her thighs so she could jump and be his height. “Keep your hands above my waist.”

“What?” he asked dizzily as he pulled away but nipped at her jaw.

“You still have a lot of trust and forgiveness to earn,” she teased as she unhooked her legs from his waist and landed on her own two feet.

“Damn do you know how to wrap a man around your finger.” He pulled her in for a searing kiss. But he couldn’t help his mind wandering to her fiance. The man who abandoned her in some far corner of the world. Sam wanted to find him and...and maybe his anger at himself now had a different target after all these years. “Do you have a ride home?” he asked tenderly as he swayed with her in his arms.

“Are you offering to fly me back?” she asked jokingly but also seriously. She’d say yes if he offered.

“No. I wish I could but the men in camo don’t trust me outside the base.” She pouted and it punched him in the gut. “Soon. I’ll make it work, figure something out.” The following moment of peaceful silence and companionship was interrupted by his phone ringing in his pocket.

“Real work or superhero work?” she asked as he looked at it with a furrowed brow.

“Both. Just need a minute and then...then…” It kept ringing and ringing, he couldn’t get a thought out.

“I’ll go clean downstairs. Don’t take too long.” She kissed his cheek, dragging her hand down his arm before twining their fingers briefly, Sam not letting her escape his grasp until she got too far away to hold onto. He knew he kept putting this on his plate. His normal missions as Falcon. The Flag Smashers. The house and the boat. All of them felt like a weight on his soul but Leila...Leila felt like she lifted it. When she was around, he felt like he could breathe again. He was doing his best to juggle everything and he hoped, and prayed, none of them fell from his grasp. Not again. Not this time.

#sam wilson #anthony mackie #falcon #the falcon #sam wilson fanfiction #falcon fanfiction #the falcon fanfiction #tfatws #the falcon and the winter soldier #falcon and winter soldier #avengers #captain america #marvel fanfiction #marvel #avengers fanfiction #captain america fanfiction #sam wilson x reader

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