#tumblr bring back my tiny text editor

[stocious]

how to spot stolen/uncredited gifs + how to work the search function

there's been a lot of talk about not stealing gifs and not supporting people who do, but it might not be easy to spot shady posts for everyone. so i made this little guide with things i personally look out for. at the end there's also a guide on how to work the search function. i hope this will help out there on the wild tumblrmachine!

the gif has a watermark that doesn't match the poster and there's no "gif by @[username]" under the gif. please note that a lot of people don't watermark their gifs at all, but this is one of the biggest give aways to a gif being stolen and reuploaded.

the gif doesn't stretch across the entire post. very seldom does a gif maker go through the entire process of making a gif and not making it cover the entire post space. in the example below, the gif was most likely a part of a set, as a second gif would fit perfectly right next to the one posted.

"theme posts" with gifs of different sizes and/or quality. in the examples below, "mickey smiling" has gifs of different sizes and no "gif by" credit under either of them. "theme posts" can still be made with proper credit to the gif maker, like "road trip" to the right.

new posters and no "my gifs" tag. if you're unsure if the gif is stolen or not, click the top of the post and go the blog and look at the tags attached to the post. if someone made the gif themselves, there's usually a "my gifs" or a similiar tag under the post. this might be a good thing to do if someone is new to the space has started posting gifs. this is not 100% foolproof method, but it can help you give an idea if the gif is stolen or not.

so how do i work the search function? how do i get the gifs i want?

good question! in the example of "mickey smiling", try searching for just that - "mickey milkovich smile" and you should get some good results. in the case of grabbing a specific gif from a specific post, i'll try to make a guide down below. if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask!

first, find a post you want to use a gif from. we're gonna use this set from @heymacy.

open the post you wanna use and copy the url to it. then make a new post and hit the gif search button. paste the url and it should find you the first gif of the set. click the gif and tumblr brings you back to your post with the gif and the "gif by heymacy" at the bottom.

but say you want the last image in the set. we're gonna use a tiny bit of html but don't fret.

first, do the previous step i just explained above.

click the cog wheel at the top right corner, scroll down and choose "text editor - html". go back to your post and it should be a whole bunch of text instead of an image.

search the text for "img scr" and then delete everything between the two quotation marks following that, it starts with https and ends with gifv.

go back to the post with the gif set and right click the gif you want (in this case the last one of the set), and choose "copy image link" and paste it between the quotation marks where you deleted stuff before. make sure not to delete any quotation marks and that your new link placed between them!

please note: you might get an error message from tumblr that the post contains unsupported html, just ignore that.

then click the cog wheel again, and change the editor back to "rich text". you're new image should be there, with proper credit!

bam, you're done! i'm also including a video below of me doing these steps so you can follow along. sorry my os is in swedish, but the thing i right click on is just "copy image link" as stated above.

here's a more in depth guide to this method, but it can be a little confusing if you're not used to working in html.

as you add more images and text to your post, the amount of text after you change to the html editor will increase. it might be hard to find the exact gif you want to change, but play around with it and try it out. the more you use the method, it'll be easier to work with.

thank you for coming to my ted talk, i hope this helps! 🫂

[grisler]

alright roleplayers,    im not even going to lie — not being able to format posts in the true Vintage Tumblr Style™ has actually pissed me off so bad... anyways, if you want to bring back the old    <sup><small>    text,    this is how you do it. 

just for transparency’s sake, this will not force tiny text on people who do not follow the tutorial, so its a win win for us who like that ye olde ant sized tumblr text and those that don’t. it also works with the post editor!

—— i am not a pro coder or teacher, therefore my terminology may be off. i tried my best to illustrate & visualize everything, though !!

1.     what you’re going to want to do is download the    stylus    extension from the extension store ( mozilla & chrome ),   not   stylish. ( stylish steals browser history and shit.    stylish bad.   )

2.    when the extension is installed, select “find styles” from the extension menu, and look up “no more small text”.  the correct style should have a pic of jenna marbles on the dash as the thumbnail lol. 

3.    alright !     we got the    ‘no more small text’   extension. it sounds counter productive, but it’s not ! it edits the <small> text function, so now all we have to do is edit the font size it changes the <small> tag to. to do this, click the little pen next to the name of the extension.

4.    this should open a new page with a text editor containing the code for the script. pay no attention to any code except the chunk shown below. see that circled green text ? that's what we're changing.

i haven't messed with em as unit for font size (i'm used to px), but i've found that 0.82em is a pretty good size to use for smaller text, however, you can mess around with the font size to make it as big or little as you want. after adjusting, your code should look like this:

5.    after this, you're pretty much done! this will basically change the font size of anything under the <small> functions on your dashboard to your desired size. all you have to do is hit the save button to the left of the style editor page. maybe even rename it to small text or something so it's not confusing in the future.

but.... if you want to be greedy and bring back that sweet <sup> text from before, like, 2020, you're gonna add a little vertical-align attribute.

6.   DIRECTLY after the font size styling, and BEFORE the closing } we're gonna add this: vertical-align: 3px!important; if pasted correctly, your code should now look like this:

the vertical-align tag will add an offset to the text under the <small> function, simulating the look of the old <sup><small> tag combination. we can't actually bring back real <sup><small> text because, as far as i'm aware, tumblr blocks it. just like with the prior step, mess around with the amount of vertical align to your hearts content ! after this you're finished, like actually finished.

[greyias]

tumblr ate my previous post :( but here have some secret achievos and (maybe sekrit?) decos knowledge for when 7.3 drops

I finally got my picnic!

I am way too tired to retype everything up after this stupid text editor ate all my hard work but here's the picnic spot on the map:

Create your pick-i-nick basket by combining two items. Get the Forgotten To-Go Order in the Gormak Cantina (you'll have to unlock and grab the "A Cantina in Crisis" mission to get inside), and then find the To-Go Order either on the bar or one of the tables. You will also need to grab some Fermented Rhudik Tea, which for me spawned right next to the Crew Skill Vendor in the Interpreter's Retreat. Then go to this spot on the map, clear out the Mawvorr's milling about

and enjoy your picnic:

I kind of want art now of Grey happily sipping on some tea, looking out over a tranquil Voss pond as she enjoys a quiet picnic in between galactic crises

To befriend a very tiny mawvorr (presumably after doing this several times), you'll need to combine three items:

Some ridiculously expensive nutrients that will eat you out of house and tech fragments, a discarded vorantisteak in the Gormak Cantina, and a peppery slimegourd (I found it outside the Interpreter's retreat hidden between a tree and rock in the middle of a mob of mawvorrs):

Combine those three together to make some very high end fancy mawvorr chow, and feed it to the tiny guy hiding behind a building in the Interpreter's Retreat:

I assume you will have to do this several times, because I didn't get much indication of anything after I finished feeding him once. So this is a very expensive little pet (but I still want him so bad :( )

ALSO. I have no idea what triggered it, but when I went back to the Nutrient Vendor to get the king's ransom price on the nutrients, suddenly THIS was available:

I don't know what triggered it: doing the picnic, feeding the mawvorr, or finishing the daily regarding bringing water from the fountain (that last seems to make the most sense, but who knows).

It is MASSIVE, as it takes up a centerpiece hook:

(a Grey for scale)

Anyway. There's a HORRIBLE explanation, since Tumblr ate the pretty, well-organized one. Enjoy!

Logged back into the PTS again, and am happy to report...

...that the Gormak Cantina mission is a daily! Absolutely delightful!

Immediately I grabbed it and went searching for the tea I couldn't find last night, and searched every nook and cranny! And I discovered a few things:

The location of the forgotten order and the raw vorantisteak just molding on the floor change each time you enter the instance. When I walked in the first time, the forgotten order was on the bar, but the second time I entered, it had moved back to the table. The steak so far has spawned underneath that table we found it under on stream, and once over here by the chef.

One of the Gormak customers left a tip for the bartender droid! And it's actual coins!

What I did not find in the cantina was the tea.

Somehow I missed an entire two doorways that led to other rooms within the Gormak area!:

My missing tea was in neither of those rooms.

I even went and snooped around the Voss encampent and the Shrine, and I didn't find it there. No idea where that tea is (or the other two ingredients for our Widdle Guy secret achievement.)

Also, it looks like you get three dailies in the Voss encampment, and three in the Gormak, so running dailies over here should be nice and fun and quick when this launches!

[hemolovin-blog]

since its NEVER 50 degrees in december in the midwest, im @ the zoo.

[bomberqueen17]

that lil sleepy emoji guy

that’s me. sleepy.

I got myself together yesterday morning and packed up and left the farm. I’d texted Dude that I’d bring some vegetables, but he always gets so stressed when I bring a bunch of food back, that I ended up just... not. Of course he’d made a meal plan for the week incorporating “random veggies” as part of at least one meal, so, now I have to go buy some veggies. But listen there wasn’t a lot going spare in that walk-in cooler and I didn’t feel like pawing through the ambitious turnips. So, no real regrets.

He was out, still shopping, when I got home after a long, boring, but entirely uneventful drive, and that meant the cat had all this time to tell me her woes, and talk about how nobody had petted or fed her in the entire week I’d been gone.

[image description: a small gray cat with green eyes gives the camera a close-up look that I happen to know is lovey eyes but the camera captured it as a mildly annoyed look; my hand is scratching her chest]

Hey I don’t know how to put alt text on images, it occurs to me, and that’s annoying as fuck, I just clicked all around and if you embed an image like this there’s no setting I can find? Do I have to click over to the HTML view and add it there? I know how to do it by hand, but I don’t like to fuck with the HTML view on Tumblr because it is as you might imagine kind of a nightmare.  Anyway I’ve been avoiding their “Look a shiny new post editor!” because I’ve been on this site long enough to know that it sucks and if I opt in early I won’t be able to opt out without doing weird refresh tricks. So anyway, clunky descriptions it is, y’all.

So anyway, Dude got home from grocery shopping and had bought me a tiny cake, which delighted me right down to my toes. He was also much more enthusiastic about me coming back than he had been last time; I think he’d been distracted and i hadn’t felt well, but it was nice to have neither be the case this time.

I am not horribly horribly sore today but I am tired, like, bone-and-muscle weary. I woke of course at 5 and couldn’t fall back asleep but I did get a lot of cat snuggles; she loves it when I wake up early and she can crawl all over my face and get attention. I’ll take it, over the catshenanigans that tormented me at my sister’s-- THOSE cats wanted me to go up and down the extremely steep stairs at my sister’s house to indulge their whims, and that’s not a thing I like at all. I don’t really mind being awakened for pettings, if they don’t involve me leaving the bed.

Also of course my precious kitten is the best cat, so, indulging her whims is no trouble at all, but that’s how that works.

I fell asleep on the couch at 8pm and had to wake myself up to go to bed. Now I’m at work doing simultaneous 8mm and VHS transfers. This one’s upside-down and backwards so I have to rewind it first. Annoyinggggg.

[probablydrunk23]

Back to it

Haven't written in a while, been a bit gun shy. But here I am typing words straight into the text editor bareback. I haven't written for many reasons. Actual scrap that. I was going to make up some bullshit about covid, but the real reason? is I finished my book over a year ago, a book I thought contained some of the best writing of my life. And I couldn't even get my friends to read it. My agent pitched it to, maybe, two people and  now its in limbo. I still don't know what to do with it.

So now apart from bits its been a year since I've done some serious blood letting soul wringing fuck em all writing. 

And I'm  working way back into it. Got to be honest it took a fucking full 45 minutes of swearing and cat squeezing to get into my account so my mood isn't improved. Nearly an hour ago insomnia let me know I wouldn't be really making an honest attempt at sleep until the birds start singing again, so I dutifully picked up my phone and got out of bed so I could doom scroll, suck down my feeds, and check the usual fetish poles. for markers, signs and portents. But as I sat down I just couldn't  bring myself too. Over the last few days I've become increasingly aware of my tendency to hyper focus to avoid anything uncomfortable, distract myself with shitty jangly keys rather than sit in the pain, or discomfort. And over the last two years there's been a lot of that. That time gone scrolling miles through the sewer of human thought looking for the sweetcorn nuggets in the shit.

Writing is the only thing I've ever been good at. Actually scratch that, that's a lame cliché and worst of all its a lie. I'm good at a lot of things. in fact that's the problem. Once I've cracked how to do something, there's no satisfaction in actually getting there. I'm bored easily and boredom is physically painful. So writing, I suppose with my dyslexia writing is the only thing that constantly challenges me, my taste constantly outpacing my skill. I love it.

Perhaps I've been procrastinating, I've recently done a lot of reading about ADHD and if I could get it together for long enough I would probably chase a diagnosis. catch 22. but doing has been making think about procrastination. Thinking about thinking. I've noticed that I tend to put of tasks if I don't know exactly the process of getting it done. it seems I need to imagine the task in its entirety for me too even countenance starting it. That's not to say the tasks ever follow that plan. but tasks I have to do and there's just a jumble with a question mark in my brain. Its seems I wont even allow my self to sit down and think about thinking about them. The really frustrating thing is knowing that if I did just sit down and start, they'd be done, or at least id be able to see the how to do it.

I've missed blogging, about as low stakes as you can get. you can say anything because no ones going to read this especially not here on tumblr. But there's enough of a chance that someone might that i care about being semi coherent.

god I hope this is it now, the doom scrolling finally has lost its lustre. I'm not making any promises about writing more. Even if I do it'll more of this drivel. BUT its got to better than having my soul sucked out of my eyes in exchange for tiny hits of dopamine squeezed out using cynically coded fruit machine game mechanics by amoral bastards that didn't care they were making the human experience more shitty for everyone. After fourteen months of replacing my phone with spunking words into the ether  if I can come up with one turn of phrase, one sentence I can be proud of I will have had more concrete worth than that time in my phone.

until then, if you actually got this far, thank you. Don't feel bad if your not where I am with my phone, or are using it to avoid some shitty thing in your life. Do what you need to do to get through. And if you are struggling, using tumblr to distract from whatever ugly demon is sitting on your chest. You've made a friend. I’m here. hi, your doing great. hold on. You’ll get through this. We all will.

[cawolters]

December...? DECEMBER!?

What about September?

November?

October?? What did I miss??

Yes, well, no you didn’t miss any vitals updates. I have reasons for why I haven’t been active on tumblr, and the most honest reason is that I didn’t feel like writing and posting on here since spring.

The writeblr community is so so great, one of the best in the web, but the platform is driving me nuts. Flagging, shadow bans, tag dysfunction and draft erasing/crashing, have just completely smashed my love for making fun and elaborate posts.

However, lots of updates has been made and i keep seeing wips I want to tag list and people i want to hang out with, so I’ll stick around for another decade or so! Hashtag always lurking.

The more polite reason for my absence, and equally truthful I might add, is that I was very busy the last few months —COMMISSIONS! LIFE! IRL NETWORKING!

And now I’ll tell you about it all, starting by answering the Q on everyone’s tongue:

1) Is Flash Fiction Friday Getting Revived in 2020?

In short, yup.

I need it, you need it, the world needs it. We need to WRITE folks. And the lovely prompt Friday will be back with week no 30 (!!) on:

Friday the 10th of January!

I have a capable team of creative and lovely writeblrs on the job as to how we an ensure consistent posting —and just and FYI, we might even end up with giving the FFF it’s own blog.

Run free, be with the people my beautiful prompt creature, inspire! And give me something to read!!

Stay tuned for updates and tell me is you want to be added to the FFF tag list.

Now next up is my scrip update!

2) Querying ‘The Serpent Kiss’

All is well in the land of querying.

or... well almost.

Alrighty, lemme explain below.

So, if you’ve been following me for awhile, you know my third child (whom is not currently teething or using my lipstick as a crayon) is my dark new adult fantasy trilogy —The Serpent Kiss <3

If you donno what I’m talking about, here’s a quick summery of the query process:

I finished the English first draft, two and a half years ago (I think?) and started looking into querying after my fifth draft was done.

I decided very early on that I would feel more comfortable working here in Denmark, where I already have a literary network, and actually understand the cultural unwritten rules when working with publishers!!

Since then I have been rewriting, tweaking, had beta-readers, editors, a sponsored translator (who translated the script from English to danish) BEFORE I started querying seriously in Denmark.

During the time where the book was being reviewed, I’ve kept in touch with houses who showed interest in the book from the get go (encouraging me to push onward), done a lot of social media work (especially on Instagram since the publishers all mentioned the importance of that platform) and attended books cons to physically mingle (it makes a difirence —really).

Ah, and now, finally, we’ve starting to get serious replies back from the Danish publishers.

Let’s look at what they’ve said so far.

(And mind you, this is Denmark. We’re a tiny country and we DON’T have adult fantasy books written by danish authors, so their critique is based on that. YA is what’s sellable and had been for years, buuut I also know that tendency will shift, so that’s what I’m really selling. A new trend basically. Always understand what pov the critique is coming from and don’t stop at the first rejection)

3/5: ‘no thank you, there’s no marked in Denmark for your book’

1/5: ‘we love it but rewrite it to YA and we have a deal’ — I said, no thank you

1/5: ‘we love it as is and we want to give you a deal, but we have to work out the legal kinks, and we will give you final answer by the end of January!’

So I’m awaiting the final judgement!!

But not really, it’s not the final judgement. If the deal falls through, and it might, never pop champagne before signing, I still have four more houses I could send the book to here in Denmark.

And, I could still go the international route and query over seas.

Yup! That’s the update on that!

Next up? The general writing!

3) A Year Of Author

“It’s really hard being a writer... Not on the days where you’re writing, but on the days where you’re not!”

— @CAlisaWolters, Instagram confessions

My year of full time professional writing, meaning mainly relying on my text/skill/art to heave in the cash, is six months down and going — OK!!

Here’s what I’ve learned/done so far:

I’m writing 4-7h on commissions, the second book of the trilogy, short-stories, poetry and another little YA project every day. Yes. Every day. And that’s very very cool and also exhausting mentally. My advice to others: HAVE OBLIGATORY DAYS OFF! (Oh yea and I also won nanowrimo but the project is a secret shh).

I’m somewhat alone most of the time but being a closeted introvert, I don’t mind, but I miss coworkers. That’s why Café dates and write-ins with writer pals IS IMPORTAINT.

Also! Speaking of socializing, I’ve been to five writers cons/events and I definitely recommend making it a priority for all professional authors. BRING BUSINESS CARDS!!

I have a set routine and I’m really happy with it! Early mornings is the best! And Monday is where I don’t write, but keep up with social media and answer mails and run errands! MAKE A ROUTINE!

And that’s the update on THAT!! Phew I’m getting winded, are you? Fear not we one have one last thing to cover. Promise.

4) Personal Life and Drag Kings ^_^

Where to start? Ah I know! I’ll start with the drag king storytelling event because that’s really what stands out!

I’m a mom, a wife, a bisexual, a general theatrical person and a genderfluid jellyfish who uses she/her pronounces, so when someone booked me for a storytelling event, I decided to go in drag. Naturally. Tsh duh.

I’ve really been experimenting with my gender this year, playing with apperence and comfortzones, and discovering that my real happiness lies somewhere between flooofy dresses and black buttondowns. And not just the clothes, but there attitude, the demeanor, the mental space of wearing cologne!! It might not sound dramatic, but to me it’s been A RIDE!

(I’ve been dying to go full drag for a long looooong time and I should’ve gone all out on the makeup —but next time!!! Also the event went so so well and I had the best time! I’m going to do it again!)

And NOW I’m done! Hah not really, but I won’t force you to spend all day reading my updates and this post is already so loooong 💕💕✨💕

The new year looms!! May it bring you love and confidence, and lots of new opportunities!!

Hug hug hug!!

.

.

.

~Ciao

[yoonjinkooked]

lockdown | (m) - Chapter 1

moodboard by @flajka

pairing; jungkook/female OC genre; college au, strangers to lovers, smut and tiny bit of fluff too, humor ofc rating; explicit words; 4.900

— synopsis; Eunhee is in trouble and facing a deadline - in comes curly haired jungkook to save her life, make her laugh and maybe, just maybe, fuck her brains out. When the two end up locked in a building overnight, who knows what will happen?

warnings (for this chapter): cursing, OC really wants to murder Tae, banter, cute Kook, slightly cocky Kook, hints of sexual tension. Just an introduction chapter, really. 

A/N: I hope you enjoy the first part guys. I am now starting to work on Chapter 2 and will let you know when I plan on posting it.  Let me know what you think - I’m still a tumblr newbie and basically, I’m crappin my pants. 

With that being said, let’s start chapter 1 :)

In the life of a journalism major, there are a few life-changing, stress-inducing moments that essentially serve as a preview of what’s to come if you do decide stay on your chosen career path.

For me, a handful of these moments made me question anything and everything I have ever known about the career I’ve chosen to pursue back when I was 18 and frankly, a little bit stupid. One of these moments was back when I was doing an obligatory internship at a small, local newspaper, only to realize that the editors and big shots there expected me to do nothing more than to make them coffee and copy papers in their stead.

Another moment was when I attended my first murder trial, which probably would end up being a part of my future job, only to spend the entire afternoon wondering if this really is something I want to do for the rest of my life.

And the final moment, at least the final one that I can think of right now, is currently occurring, with me losing my shit as we are trying to get the final edition of this year’s university magazine ready for printing. And I, as one of two co-editors, will be the one to blame if anything goes wrong.

Half of my grade depends on this. My future job prospects depend on this. Whether or not the professor is happy can influence the direction of my masters’ next year. This is ride or die for me and I am losing it.

“Namjoon, where the hell is he?” I ask my co-editor, best friend and partner in crime. Who also happens to be the only person on this planet who is well equipped to deal with me losing my shit.

“I know as much as you do,” he reminds me, moving the phone away from his ear. “I am trying to reach him now. You panicking will not do us any good and it definitely won’t make Taehyung answer me sooner. So don’t panic and focus on the things we already have here and work with that. The photos aren’t the only thing we need to look over before it’s ready for print.”

I nod my head franticly, knowing deep down that he has a point but also knowing that won’t help me at all. It never does because whenever I am chasing a deadline, I follow the same line of action. Work, panic, panic some more, work, panic like the world is ending, forcefully calm down and then, finally, get shit done. I am not sure if I am on the ‘panic some more’ or ‘panic like the world is ending’ phase yet but as I run fingers through my hair, letting my nerves get the best of me, I am positive said hair is gray.

I hear Namjoon cursing under his breath but for the sake of getting things done, I ignore him for now and simply focus on the task at hand – proofreading. As long as I preoccupy myself with tasks that need to be done, I cannot focus on the fact that Taehyung is late, like he always is, despite it being the one time he truly needed to be on time.

So for the next few minutes, I go over several articles in the speed of light, once, twice, three times. No matter how much they’re using spell-check, our reporters still make mistakes and honestly, when I see my name below one title, I know I am not allowed to judge because I obviously do it too.

Campus activity, student achievements, published works and former alumni ‘look, they’re famous now’ column – all covered and grammatically perfect. And Namjoon is still trying to reach the one man we need the most right now. Slowly but surely, the other students are becoming less frantic and more calm and casual, because their tasks are all but finished. Namjoon, Hoseok and I? Not so much.

“Okay, what the hell?” Hoseok throws his pen rather violently on his desk. “He does this every time. Every damn time. I’m the designer – I need to go over everything and make sure the photos are put where they belong. How can I do that if I don’t have said photos?”

“Hoseok, I know I’m not the textbook definition of calm but we need to try to be,” I tell him, turning my chair to face him over our connected desks. “Try to design it somehow, leaving the space for the photos. Vertical or horizontal, I will find good photos to fit. And if I have to change something, I will.”

“Are you sure you can do that?” he looks doubtful, which is extremely insulting, since we have known each other for three years and have been working together for more than two.

“Basic editing? Yeah, I can do that,” I roll my eyes. “If you doubt my editing skills, you can stick around till midnight to check on me.”

“No way,” he shakes his head. “It’s Jimin’s birthday party tonight and you know I need to be there.”

“Are you serious?” I ask, not even sure why, since it’s absolutely obvious that he is dead serious. “This is the most important edition we’re going to release. We’ve been doing this for years and this is our grand exit, which we need to execute perfectly, and you’re telling me you want to go to a party?”

“I’ll be going too,” Namjoon covers the speaker of his phone to tell me. “Sure, this edition is a big deal and we want it done well but most is already done and this isn’t our entire life.”

“Oh please,” I reach for something, anything, and end up hitting him on the chest with a block of post-its. “You’re just going because you hope to hook up with Hyejin, even though we all know you will just end up drunk, alone and watching her from a distance.”

“How dare you?” Namjoon is flabbergasted.

“She isn’t wrong,” Hoseok chuckles, ignoring the glare Namjoon throws his way. “But he’s right about this not being our entire life. You will burn out, Eunhee. It’s been two weeks and you haven’t stopped thinking about this once,” he tells me, as if I needed to be reminded. “This is the final edition with you being the editor. You should celebrate, not stay here after hours and pulling the hair of your head.”

“With the two of you playing beer pong and complaining about girls ignoring you, someone has to be the responsible one,” I point out. “All of this is riding on the three of us and you’re just… gonna dump me?” the betrayal is evident in my voice and yet, neither one of them is bothered enough to look guilty. Before they’re co-editor and designer, they’re just stupid, horny students.

“It’s already done Eunhee,” Namjoon rolls his eyes. “The one doing the dumping here is Taehyung and you just told Hoseok you can handle the editing. If you’re not sure, you can send him your final version and he can fix it if it needs to be fixed.”

“I am not leaving that party to fix Taehyung’s mess,” Hoseok cuts in.

“Our mess,” I remind him. “We have until 4AM to send it. So long as you’re not wasted out of your mind, it’s doable. If you even need to fix anything. Taehyung is always late but he also always brings more than enough material for us to work with. He’s a jackass but a talented jackass.”

“And a jackass who can’t answer his phone,” Namjoon adds, throwing his phone on the desk, before sighing as he slumps down onto his chair. “I’m going to regret that,” he glares at his phone.

“I can’t force you to stay here and help me,” I mumble, watching as the student reporters casually leave our office space, not even bothering to say goodbye because it’s the final week – who cares, life goes on, we’re going to see each other eventually and our portion of work is done. “I can, however, remind you of this in the years to come, guilt tripping you into doing favors. Many, many favors.”

“You make it sound like you’re not already doing that half the time,” Hoseok points out.

“Not my problem you somehow always end up owing me one. Or two. Or five,” I shrug as I turn towards my laptop, planning on searching for some stock photos we might be able to use, if Taehyung doesn’t show up. I know that he always does, last minute or not, but I can’t leave anything to chance. While stock photos would be a cop-out of sorts, we need to have a plan B.

The next two hours pass in almost complete silence. An occasionally sigh would leave Hoseok and every now and then, Namjoon would curse under his breath as he tries to reach Taehyung for what has to be the hundredth time – so far, to no avail. The panic I felt earlier had already left my system so I was able to focus on other things, all the while ignoring what seems to be our pending doom.

The sun had set and the lights are now on and that son of a bitch is still not answering his phone.

“You know, at this point I’m starting to wonder if we have better chances of finding him at Jimin’s party,” Hoseok breaks the silence. “I’m done with all the pages, I left enough space for all kinds of photos and there’s literally nothing more that we need to do.”

“Speak for yourself,” I mumble as I open the email he just sent me, showing the draft for the final version of the magazine. It looks as amazing as possible, seeing as 98% of photos are missing – instead, white blocks serve as breaks between long rows of text. “You know what? You two go. Go and have fun and if you find him, kick his ass. There’s no way he’d ever miss Jimin’s party. I’ll stay here and finish this up and when you send him to me, I’ll kick his ass too,” I tell them.

“Eunhee, are you sure?” Namjoon walks over to my desks and leans on it, giving me what I can only describe as a look of pure and utter pity. “I don’t want to leave you hanging; you’re not the only one with the responsibility here.”

Seeing as I am the only one that will sit Jimin’s birthday party out, I kind of am, but I do not say it. “It’s okay Joon,” I reassure him. “Go. Have fun. Try to get some with Hyejin. I’ll take care of this, it’s not like it’ll be the first time I pull an all-nighter. Just find that bastard and get those photos to me.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” Hoseok stands up and throws a bag over his shoulder. “We will find him and I will do my best to stay sufficiently sober if you need my help. Which, if you do, don’t hesitate to call me, okay?” I nod, knowing I would rather fix it myself than have drunk Hoseok ruin it. He’s majestic with the editing software but when drunk, he can’t even walk straight, much less edit.

“Just make sure to get his USB to me, even if you have to kill him to make it happen,” I remind them. Namjoon is still worried but I roll my eyes at him, which apparently is the sign he needed to get his things and leave. I wave them out, surprisingly relieved to have the office for myself.

I am a decent team player but the last couple of years have shown me that I do my best work when I do it alone. Not to say that I take all the credit – hell no. Joon is the editor as much as I am and half the work is done by him but at times like these, I just want him out and away, busy with Hyejin. This way, if it’s a mess – it’s my mess. If it’s a work of art – it’s my work of art.

With a coffee in one hand and glasses of my head, I go over last year’s photo folder – that’s a better plan B than some basic stock photos. Some of the photos look like a decent backup – our campus hasn’t changed much over the last couple of months, after all. As long as I avoid last year’s seniors, I might be able to pull off plan B without anyone except a handful of us knowing the truth.

Even the swimming team – they have won gold last year, they have won gold this year too. The members are all the same, no new freshmen, no seniors last year. If my memory serves me well, all of them kept their natural hair colors and I can totally use said photo in this month’s edition. Sure, Jimin and the rest of the team will probably know what’s up but that’s nothing a round of beer can’t fix.

Look at me – such a professional. Bribing my way to get the work done. Yay.

In the midst of scrolling, I pause to glance at the clock – it’s almost ten and still no sign of Taehyung. Stifling down the pending panic, I take a deep breath and decide to play some music, hoping to distract myself more. While 80s rock has its charms, I still fidget as I scroll through folders upon folders, grabbing hold of my favorite koala mug again and downing the rest of the coffee in one go. Needing something to distract me further, I open the top drawer of my desk, grabbing the emergency M&Ms I’ve kept there for a few weeks now, knowing I was bound to pull an all-nighter sooner or later.

Just as I down a handful of candy, someone knocks on the office door and I nearly choke. I cough, make sure a lone M&M is not going to kill me, take a deep breath and shout a ‘come in’.

The little hope I have deflates as I realize it’s not Taehyung, the bastard himself – instead, it’s a guy I know, but not really. Tall, wavy brown hair, wide brown eyes and a slightly dumbfounded look, hidden under the hood of his black sweatshirt as he barely steps inside the office, still with one foot out as if he is ready to run.  

I am positive I know him. I’m sure we have class together, or had the year before. Or perhaps we just have classes in the same building – I know I’ve seen him before, in the background, on the side, but for the life of me, I can’t put a face to the name.

“Can I help you?” I ask, once he doesn’t speak up for a few moments.

“Yeah,” he snaps out of his daze, tilting his head before reaching for his pocket – I keep my eye on his hands, half expecting him to draw a gun and shoot me in place. “Taehyung sent me to give you this,” he says as he pulls out a USB stick out of his pocket.

Finally, I can breathe. Finally, I know I will manage to get this done tonight. “Thank fuck,” I sigh, closing my eyes for a second before opening them up again and realizing I have just confused the shit out of him. “I was positive the jackass would leave me hanging. I would have murdered him in cold blood.”

“He’d never do that,” the guy smiles at me, a smile that evaporates as quickly as it appeared; making me wonder if I even imagined it. “If he had told me sooner, you wouldn’t have to wait. He texted me like 10 minutes ago, telling me that I need to bring this to the office.”

“He left the stick with you and didn’t tell you what it’s for?”

“No, he asked me to edit the photos,” he tells me. “Oh. You don’t… I’m the G.C.F guy. I’m the other photographer,” he explains and suddenly, the little boxes in my head fall into their designated place.

Taehyung had a photography partner. I’d say a solid half of the photos we’d print were Taehyung’s, and the others belong to the guy always signed as JJK, G.C. F; I have never met him, never asked for his name and before tonight, he had never showed up in the office.

And now I can remember the guy more clearly – he always had a camera, either hanging around his neck or covering his face as he would relentlessly take photos.

“Ah, now I get it,” I smile. “I’m Eunhee, the editor.”

“I know,” he tells me. “Jeongguk.”

Yep, I know the name. It’s all clicking now.

“Well don’t just stand there Jeongguk,” I tell him as I stand up; I walk around my desk and start Hoseok’s PC, knowing that he has a better editing software ready to go. “I’m going to need your help for this. Everyone else is getting shitfaced at Jimin’s so if you’re up for it, you’re going to be the one to help me get this edition ready by 4AM. You up for it?”

Honestly, I’m not particularly surprised when he doesn’t answer me straight away – it’s not like I’m offering him free food, drinks and a night he’ll remember – quite the opposite, I’m offering him a night full of work. Simply put, I’m begging him to help me, without actually openly begging.

“Sure,” I hear him shuffle around as he puts his backpack down on the ground. “Where do you need me?”

"Just get yourself a chair," I wave my hand around the room, staring at nothing as I try to figure out where should we start from. I suppose that from the beginning is the only real answer to that one. "Hobi had set it all up for me to finish but I think I need to see what you've brought me, see what i have to work with," I decide, turning to Jeongguk, just in time to see him drag Namjoon's desk chair from the corner of the office.

"All of them are edited and ready for use," he reassures me with a tight smile as he joins me behind the desk, a good foot between our chairs. Noticing that he still has his hood up and covering half of his face, I bite my tongue and decide not to wonder why - he has his reasons, I suppose.

"Then we just need to decide what goes where and that is where you come to my rescue."

"What makes you think that should be my call?" he asks, not bothering to hide his surprise.

"Well, you're a photographer," I announce, as if the guy is not aware of his profession. "Doesn't that officially make you a better judge when it comes to esthetic mumbo jumbo?" I ask, because I truly don’t know. I am not familiar with the job requirements a photographer needs to fulfill, other than to have a camera, of course. I simply imagine they have some sense of beautiful. Wouldn’t be the first time I was wrong about something and that is why I ask – there’s no shame in not knowing.

After a beat of silence Jeongguk looks at me, keeping direct eye contact for one whole second, which is time enough for me to conclude that he is cute, ridiculously so. Cute in a way that no man in his early 20s is allowed to be. Yet not cute enough to make me focus on him instead of the task before us.

"I guess so," he tilts his head as i force my jaw shut - now is not an appropriate moment for ogling. "Aren't you the boss lady though?"

"Boss lady," I test the nickname and roll my eyes. "Difficult to work with, perhaps. Bossy? Don’t think so. But I’m taking it because I obviously need your help tonight - I am good with words, not at making them look good on paper."

“What you need to do here is not that hard,” he waves at the monitor and I turn to look at him. “Deciding on which photo should go where depends on… the overall page. The colors, the neighboring photos and countless other things. There are no rules – just feeling. Photography is feeling,” he waves his hands about as he talks, completely immersed in his explanation and making me wonder if he’s talking about this particular problem or just photography and its misconceptions in general.

“No rules?” I ask through a chuckle. “That’s not what people told me when I took a selfie from a downward angle.”

To my shock and frankly, shame, he stares at me in silence, blinking once, twice, three times. I gulp. “That was supposed to be a joke,” I elaborate in a low voice, as I hope that the ground will split in two and just swallow me into a never-ending dark hole. Or that Hobi’s PC will finally be usable.  

“Oh. Okay.”

Well, this settles it then – absolutely no possibility of mild, harmless flirtation. That flat-lined reaction will end up being a source of trauma for me in the years to come – I just know I will end up awake at 3AM in like five years, thinking of how awkward this particular moment was.

“Finally,” I feel relieved now that I can actually work with Hobi’s PC – I slide the flash in, on the first go. I nearly celebrate the seemingly impossible victory but I decide to hold myself back. If Jeongguk can’t take a joke, he will probably think I am insane if I behave like I normally would. “Now let’s see what we have here,” I mumble, opening the pop up. One folder named 1 – I open it. I click on the first photo, of a group of students sitting on grass and talking (looks absolutely staged but based on what I know about Taehyung and his G.C.F partner, they don’t roll that way). I smile when I see a photo of our swimming team huddled up together, gold medals hanging around their necks – I won’t have to use last year’s photos after all. “These are really good. Perfectly edited too. Thank you.”

“No need to thank me, it’s my job,” Jeongguk mumbles as he eyes the photos I scroll through. I can no longer tell if he’s serious or joking and I simply give it up altogether – who cares?

“This will fit perfectly,” I mumble as I finish going through the bunch of photos and end up on the first one – the one with a bunch of people that looks absolutely staged. I exit and go back to the folder, then back to the original one. It’s as if I could feel, actually physically feel, my heart slowly sliding down inside of my body. I go back and open the folder again, looking as the fear slowly grows in me. “Jeongguk, where are the other photos?” I somehow manage to utter.

“They’re all there,” he tells me, his eyes going wide when he notices the look of pure and utter horror on my face. “Taehyung told me you need 20 photos, no more, no less. There are 24, I added 4 more just in case, if you didn’t like some of them… Eunhee, what is going on?”

My chest goes up and down frantically as I try to calm the whole tornado of emotions that starts within me. Panic, worry, sadness and more than anything else, anger. Pure anger. “I will murder him.”

“What? Who will you… Taehyung?”

“I said,” I slowly speak, pausing for deep breaths. “200 photos. 200 photos, no more, no less. 200 from which we would end up using more than 100. I said 200, not 20.”

“Oh shit.”

“Yeah, oh shit.”

“What… where are you going?” Jeongguk asks as I jump off my chair and nearly fly over the desk to grab my handbag. I throw my phone inside of it and turn to look at him, only to find him flinching away from me. Apparently, I look as angry as I feel.

“I am going to Jimin’s birthday party,” I announce. “Where I will grab Kim Taehyung by the neck, drag him outside, throw him onto the ground and murder him in front of the entire student body. I’m thinking strangulation is the way to go. You should come too, take a few photos of it for the delayed magazine edition.”

“No!” Jeongguk snaps but I am already heading towards the door. His hand wraps around my wrist and he drags me back towards the desk.

“What?”

I don’t know what else to say because why the hell did he pull me like that?! I wasn’t actually going to murder Taehyung, no matter how much I might want to do so.

Jeongguk rolls his eyes at me and I feel even more stupid than he made me feel minutes ago. The nerve. “If you go there and yell at Taehyung, or even kill him in cold blood, you’re just going to end up wasting valuable time,” he tells me. Okay, true, I can’t argue with him on that one. “Not to mention that you won’t get the photos. He doesn’t have them on him at all times and even if he did, they aren’t edited.”

“So what you’re trying to tell me is that I am fucked? Like, missionary, sideways, in the ass fucked?”

“I wouldn’t choose that particular wording, but yes,” he sighs. “If you stay here, you’re not fucked. Just… follow me. It’ll make sense soon,” he seems impatient as he grabs hold of my wrist again and this time, he drags me out the door. I actually stumble to keep up with him, too confused to even ask him what the flying fuck he is doing and where the hell we’re going. He walks fast and with him dragging me behind him, I have no choice but to break into a light jog to keep my arm attached to my body.

Down the hallway and to the left, Jeongguk drags me towards the last door, in front of which he finally stops. He starts fidgeting and feeling himself up and down. It takes me a moment to realize that he is looking for the keys. “What are we doing here, what is this place?”

“This,” he unlocks the door and smiles at me mischievously. “Is my office.”

As soon as he turns on the light, it all makes perfect sense – it’s a darkroom. A darkroom which I had no idea existed, even though I have spent a bigger part of my college education just down the hallway. “Don’t just stand there, come on in,” Jeongguk urges me but I do not move. The hood that still covers half of his face, paired with the room’s red light, is making him look pretty ominous.

“No thanks, these places are as creepy as they seem in movies.”

Jeongguk laughs and shakes his head. “They’re not creepy. Suit yourself.”

“What the hell are we doing here?” I ask, feeling my earlier agitation return. Fix the mess then kill Taehyung. Stopping by a darkroom was not on my to-do list. “How the hell can this help?”

“As I said, this is my office,” he tells me and I see him rummaging through the top drawer in one of the desks that are lined up against a wall. “I keep my work here. Some, not all. Useless work mostly. Random campus photos I take just because I think the moment is worth capturing.”

“While that is very poetic and deep, how the heck can that help us now?”

“Haven’t I just said I take random campus photos?” he asks in annoyance. “I have at least one flash drive with random photos like the ones you might need. I’m a good photographer and,” he waves his hand and I notice something black in it – he walks over to me, takes my hand and puts the flash into it. “I’m the one who will make your words look good on paper.”

It’s not what he said – it’s the way he said it. For the first time tonight, his hood did not block my view of his entire face. The way his eyebrows lifted, followed by a smug smile and head tilt, my heart went into overdrive. His expression and the fact that he is a solid foot taller than I am makes it so easy for me to feel tiny, irrelevant, overpowered.

Despite being the talkative one of the duo, I am speechless for a moment because good lord, does he look hot right now. Like… please slam me against the wall and leave hickeys down my neck hot.

“Come on boss lady,” he laughs down at me. “Work awaits.”

What the fuck happened to the shy guy who couldn’t keep eye contact for longer than a second?! He is giving me whiplash! I again have to run to catch up with him but I do it without complaining, realizing that for tonight, he is my lifeline. This random dude who’s good at photography is my only hope.

Tonight’s going to be a very long night.

[caddy-whump-us]

1 13 17 24 and 25 for all of them

“All of them”…oh no, Anon. what are you doing to meeee? I’ll do my best here. If I don’t answer for someone, ping me, because I’m hitting the high notes here but some of the OCs will have to be left out.

1. Their smile

Etienne: He can do that damn looks-at-you, looks-away smile. Sometimes smiles with his mouth just a little open, sometimes smiles without showing his teeth (one extreme other the other, usually). He’ll do that straight-mouth closed-mouth half-smile sometimes too. Charming but reserved.

Nikolai: Nikolai’s smile starts in his eyes and then spreads down to his mouth. It’s like sun coming through clouds. Boyish, charming, bright. Sometimes he’ll grin with his eyes squinted shut and his nose crinkled up. He also has a wicked half-smile with a sidelong look when he’s being sneaky~

Jonathan/Avery: Steady and warm. His smile might start off reserved but it warms up after a moment. Tends to breathe a little laugh as his smile breaks open. He’s accustomed to having to maintain a certain amount of dignity or bearing, so he has a “formal smile” (closed mouth, not too expressive) that will slide into something brighter if he’s really happy.

Julian/Nick: Shyer, smiles while looking down, eyes closed or lowered, fairly small smiles, usually only shows his top teeth (but with his head down it’s hard to see). Will sometimes do that obnoxiously cute thing where he flicks his eyes up while still smiling.

Lucien: Cold and wicked, a little provocative. He’s not as inclined to smile as some of the other OCs here. Often when he does smile, it’s an act to get what he wants: pouty smiles, suggestive smiles. He’s got some major, major psychological damage and is not inclined to smile out of happiness. He may smirk from spite or malice, he might grin a little at someone else’s suffering, he’ll smile sweetly if he thinks it’s expected of him or will get him what he wants, but he’s just not…smiley in general.

Gravesby/Riddle: Gravesby was much more expressive than Riddle: open-mouthed grins, laughing with his mouth open and eyes squinted shut, big smiles with top and some bottom teeth. I mean, he was kind of a funny dude. Riddle is more shy. Much like Julian & Nick, he looks down when he smiles. His owner likes Riddle to keep his mouth soft and softly open, so when he smiles it’s a bit like the tiny smiles makeup gurus on social media use: the faintest pulling up at the corners of his mouth, a cute head tilt, but not much more. Very small and rare smiles. 8204 generally did not smile at all.

The vampires have pointy teeth when they smile. QED.

13. Their embarrassing memory from years ago

I think Julian/Nick/Gravesby has done stuff like calling teachers “mom” a few times. Most of his cringey stories are cringey to him more than anyone else: saying the wrong thing, getting laughed at. He’s shy and he’s got some anxiety in him, so what embarrasses him may seem minor to other people.

Avery was totally fascinated with this well-known researcher who was working on campus. It was sort of Known that you would see this researcher around, but you really shouldn’t try to talk to him. He would do special lectures and presentations–go to those. But Avery was still sort of star-struck and would kind of stare (from a distance) if said researcher was walking around campus. Anyway, one day, Avery’s in a coffee shop in town, getting hot chocolate because he was trying to cut down on caffeine. There was a line forming behind him, so he didn’t get the lid on just right, and he turned around to leave and the person behind him got up to the counter faster than Avery could get out of the way, and he spilled his hot chocolate all over…this famous researcher. Naturally Avery apologized, helped clean up, paid for his coffee, &c. But, wow, he was totally embarrassed. It’ll be funny someday, but it’s killing him for now.

(Modern) Lucien got “white-girl wasted” at a party once, long before he could legally drink, and then was told what he did the next morning, which was Not Fun At All. He made a complete fool of himself, did a stripper routine on a table, was incredibly obnoxious, and probably texted an ex (among other things). 

(Vampires) Lucien would deny that he’s ever done anything embarrassing ever. But the truth is that when he’s been scolded by Viktor, he’s felt extremely ashamed of himself. And it was especially bad after he’d been in the house for a while and thought he knew what he was doing and, surprise, he made a mistake–brought the wrong book, didn’t know where something was, &c–and was scolded for it. That brings him lower than low and he’s just so ashamed of himself.

Nikolai, I think, has at times tried to be funny, but his sense of humor is a little different from a lot of people’s. He has, on several occasions, said things that are funny to him but not at all to others (that is, what he said is rude is shocking). Sometimes he likes to be brash and shocking, but he also wants (so much) to be accepted that seeing how badly something he said has gone over leaves him unbelievably embarrassed.

Jonathan said a Very Bad Word when he was a child–he couldn’t get his shoe on or couldn’t get a button to go through or something–and his mother heard him say it and I suspect she had an outsized, dramatic reaction to it (shock and tears, not anger). Jonathan’s father thinks the story is hilarious and will bring it up from time to time, sometimes with Jonathan present, and that’s pretty awkward…

Etienne will make assumptions about others sometimes, which can come back to bite him. Like talking about someone behind their back and then, whoops, turns out that they’re a well-known editor of a literary magazine or something. He also likes to think he’s the smartest (or at least the most clever) person in the room, so when his cleverness is called into question or someone corrects something he’s said, that just kills him inside.

17. Their ambitions

Etienne is all about that literary and artistic recognition. He likes to imagine what the reviewers will say about his latest novel and so on. It’s not fame he wants but acknowledgement.

Lucien, at this point, would kill someone (many someones) if that’s what it took to become Viktor’s black swan (though there are some complications to that). He wants that in-between role, and he wants to be patiently waiting for his chance at being a vampire (he’s got some deep, deep motivations for this).

Nikolai honestly wants that kind of cute cottage life that you see on Tumblr a lot. A few goats, an herb garden, a cottage, no worries, no requirements, no obligations. And Jonathan has to be there too, of course. Just a quiet kind of life out in the woods without all these social expectations and stuff. He agreed to go to the university because 1. it was expected of him and 2. it’ll get him out from under his aunt and uncle. But he really wants to get back to the woods and fields.

Jonathan, being an only child, hopes to take on the responsibilities that his parents will leave him and to do well by them. Since the setting is sort of 19th century England, there are renters and cottagers working land that his parents own, and Jonathan wants to do right by them. It’s simultaneously an expectation and an ambition. Also, he just wants to be with Nikolai, however that has to be made to happen–he’ll make it happen, they’ll make it happen.

Julian (et al.) isn’t terribly ambitious. He’d like to be content, have enough money to not worry, get to do things he enjoys, have room in whatever profession he chooses to keep up with his curiosity (the boy may end up a research librarian, to be honest). He’s got those breakfast-on-a-Saturday-with-Avery-in-their-apartment-with-big-windows ambitions. He’s just not terribly ambitious by nature, really. Things some people would identify as ambitions he sometimes thinks of as responsibilities or general expectations (good grades, good job, &c).

Avery is also not terribly ambitious. But he’d like to do some good in the course of his life. I can’t remember right off what I said he was studying, but he’d like to use what he knows to do some good for other people. I think he wanted to be a doctor at one point, but realized he probably couldn’t deliver bad news to patients and families, so he may slide on over to public health or something related.

Gravesby was still sorting out his ambitions when he was kidnapped. He was a college student, after all. He was torn between majoring in History or English and was still thinking about what the fuck he wanted to do after graduation. So his immediate ambitions were good grades and the like. Ha ha, that got wrecked.  And now Riddle has no ambitions. He’s an object, a possession.

24. What motivates them

What motivates them sort of depends on where they are in their story, you know? But I can get at a few core patterns for some of them:

Etienne wants freedom–whether physical or intellectual or creative. 

Nikolai likewise wants freedom, but it’s more of a personal freedom, a kind of freedom of self-expression (he’s been repressed for a lot of his life)

(Vampires) Lucien wants power and control–two things he hasn’t had much of in his life

Julian (et al.) is really curious–about everything, pretty much. So he’ll run into figuring things out, exploring ideas. He can be a little standoffish about trying things sometimes, but he’s curious about things all the same.

Avery (and Jonathan) is generally motivated by his relationships to others. He’s not really “the mom friend” but he is sort of the “loyal guard-dog friend." 

Riddle is only motivated by his master’s wants and desires. Gravesby isn’t there anymore, so whatever motivations he had are long gone. That’s all there is to that.

25. Why you enjoy them

I enjoy them because all of my OCs (even the bad guys and villains) are coping mechanisms. 

I got into this a lot deeper at first and it was too much. Suffice to say I’ve got some damage™ and these OCs are ways for me to cope or endure or escape.

[theartof-rebelcaptain]

(1/5) So normally I don’t really answer questions that are posted in tags cause I’m not really sure if I’m supposed to (??) but also I’m feeling antsy cause I have to start an internship tomorrow and I’m nervous, so this is my distracting myself – hope you don’t mind xD The mummy au: 1) YES that is from the “I believe in you” scene, well spotted :D 2) yes I felt like I had to put his face into the gallows scene as well

(2/5) I also had to edit the body quite a bit because the original actor here is a lot more buff than Diego. That actually happens a lot, having to slim dudes down. I also edited out quite a lot of the background while I was at it cause there was too much going on on that back wall and it was annoying me.

(3/5) The gif manip where his body is based on Christopher Eccleston’s: I actually changed Eccleston’s body to match Diego’s colours and not the other way around xD tho I did change Diego a bit to match the general tone of the scene too. Like the Mummy edit I also changed his body to be slimmer and leaner.

(4/5) RO Inception AU: I just wanted to say that I’m happy you like the manip of the stormtrooper flying through the hallway like the hotel scene, because it was one of my favourite tiny manips for a long while xD

(5/5) The bathtub manips: you asked if the Diego images was from Flatliners, and you are partially right, cause the two middle ones are except his hair is from SQC – the first and last manips are entirely from SQC. Thanks a lot for the lovely comments, they were a lot of fun to read!

Oooh, congratulations on the new internship! I hope you get a lot of good hands-on experience (and perhaps employment opportunities!)

I'm sure it's pretty obvious by now, but I really like playing guessing games at how people achieved a visual effect. With manips it's pretty difficult at times, such as the manip with Eccleston's body, and the fact that you have to go out of your way to slim down the bodies of other actors (oh Diego, you wiry man, you). Super clever to create a mish-mash of things in your manips- I had no idea you manip'd Diego's SQC hair onto a Flatliners image! That's three different source images just for one character, if you include the setting. It's so much extra work but the details are definitely worth it!

I love all these bits of trivia, so thank you for sending them! It gives the rest of us better insight into the work people put in to photo manips. I only put my comments in tags because I want to keep the reblogs in its original state in order to allow the viewer to experience the work without additional text in the body of each post, so I personally have no problems with people responding to anything I say in the tags (in fact they're actually quite welcome!)

side rant, can tumblr bring back horizontal lines for the rich text editor?

[clevercatchphrase]

You Monster Chpt 33

(Full story found on my ao3 under the same username. I’m no longer linking chapters because tumblr won’t show them in the search results otherwise!)

Mettaton’s parts are heavier than they look. You aren’t surprised. After all, they did pack a pretty hefty punch every time he hit you, but trying to carry all four of his limbs is nearly impossible. Beside you, Alphys is having similar troubles, trying to get his body off the ground. All the while, the robot still hasn’t decided to enter sleep mode, instead insisting he provide words of encouragement.

“You’re doing excellent, darling! Remember, lift with your knees, not your back! Atta girl!”

“This is taking forever,” Alphys groans wiping her brow. “I’m gonna call for back up.”

Pulling out her phone, Alphys taps away on the keys as she writes out a text message. A moment later and her phone chimes with a response.

“Okay, Undyne, Sans and Papyrus are on their way to help move him. They’ll meet us in the MTT resort, so we just gotta make it that far.”

You push onward, carrying Mettaton’s arms draped over your shoulders and one leg under each of your arms. The going is slow, and the limbs drag on the ground and constantly trip you up as you get into the elevator and down the corridor back towards Alphys’ lab.

You’re greeted with screams of excitement when you open the door to the hotel lobby. The room is packed with monsters holding posters and t-shirts with your and Mettaton’s images plastered to them. News reporters with cameras and mics are asking for interviews and pictures.

Overwhelmed, you and Alphys clump together as the paparazzi surround you. Nervously, you smile and wave as cameras flash.

“Ah! There are the photographers!” Mettaton says, and begins cycling between faces of teasing winks and flirty kissing lips as his picture is taken. “I was wondering when they’d show up! Smile for the camera, darling! You’re a super star now!”

People crowd closer and ask for autographs while the reporters beg for exclusive interviews. You’re just about to get overwhelmed when I voice you didn’t think you’d ever find yourself missing shouts over the crowds.

“NYAGH! OUTTA THE WAY, PUNKS! VIP ROYAL GUARD COMING THROUGH!”

“And future royal guard also coming through!” A more nasally voice echoes.

“And also a sentry, if you want my two sents,” a third voice drawls at the end.

Reluctantly, the masses part as Undyne muscles a pathway through to them with Papyrus and Sans in tow.

“Guys! You made it!” Alphys beams.

“You called for backup?” the warrior asks. While she’s no longer in her iron uniform, Undyne is no less intimidating when she flashes that toothy grin at the both of you.

“Y-yeah!” Alphys blushes. “W-we need to get back to my lab pronto before Mettaton’s batteries completely drain. C-can you help?”

“Can I?” Undyne tucks Mettaton’s body under one arm and Alphys under the other. “Papyrus! Grab the kid and let’s blow this popsicle stand!”

You pass Papyrus Mettaton’s legs, which were definitely the heavier pair of limbs, but no less cumbersome than his noodle arms which still threatened to tangle up your legs. Beside you Sans watches with passive amusement.

“Do you want to give us a hand, Sans?” suggests Papyrus with irritation when he catches his brother just standing on the sidelines.

“Good job, bro” Sans claps lazily. “I’m really proud of you for giving a leg up.”

“Ugh! Never mind!” Papyrus groans.

“We’re ready, Undyne!” you announce. “Lead the way!”

“In that case, hang on tight, ‘cause we’re outta here! NYAGH!” Undyne bursts forth, leaving it up to the monsters to decide if they want to get out of the way or not as she charges through the lobby. The royal guard explodes out the front door, leaving you and Papyrus to do your best to keep up. The public scream in delight at your flashy exit and surge after you like a tidal wave.

“SANS!” Papyrus shouts, glancing back. “This is no time for antics! Keep up, brother!”

“It’s too late for me, bro. I’m a goner.” Sans says nonchalantly as he surfs the crowd, being passed around by monsters like a beach ball. “Save yourself. I’ll meet up with you again back at the lab.”

With Undyne waiting for no one, you’re forced to abandon Sans to the whims of the crowd and dash out of the hotel. The streets of Hotland are only a little less crowded as you make a break to the elevators. Along the way, monsters begin to point and whisper and cheer as your party scampers past and a few very overzealous fans begin to give chase.

“Crud, how are we gonna lose them?” Undyne asks when she sees the pursuers.

“I know! Head to the west elevator!” you say. “Go through the spider parlor!”

A wicked gleam flashes in Undyne’s eye as she follows your train of thought. She takes a sharp right, away from the hotel and into the narrow tunnel.

“Muffet! Are you here?” you call out when you reach the main foyer of the spider parlor.

“Back again so soon, dearie?” Muffet says as she crawls down the walls. “I just saw your performance on TV. Beautiful dance, mon ami! I’ll have to show a few of those moves to my spiders!”

“Yeah, the dance off was… certainly something!” you tell her. “But now we really need to get Mettaton back to the lab, and we’re being chased by rabid fans! Do you think you can slow them down for us and sell them a few of your backed goods?”

Muffet’s eyes crinkle with mischief. “Oooh, mon ami, that sounds delightful! Okay, girls!” she claps her three pairs of hands. “We’ve got a lot of customers headed our way! Let’s make this place spic and span so they never want to leave! Break out your oven mits!”

“Thanks, Muffet!” you shout as you jog on your way. Muffet merrily giggles and waves you farewell.

You reach the west elevator with no trouble and make it to the ground floor without any hiccups. The doors part and you’re greeted with clear streets, and at last you relax.

The sight of Sans reading a newspaper and leaning against the wall of Alphys’ lab meets you when you approach the building.

“Sans?” you speak up, looking back in confusion. “What- How did you get here before us?”

Sans shrugs. “Eh, I took a short cut. But that’s not important. Check this out, Kiddo. You’re in the newspaper.”

Sans turns the sheet over to show you the front page. Right smack dab in the center is a picture of you and Mettaton dancing together on stage. The editor captured a brilliant shot just when you and Mettaton both struck a pose while fireworks were exploding behind you.

“Wow, they work fast.”

“Eh, there’s never really much to report on down here, so the journalists ain’t exactly busy.”

From under Undyne’s arm, Mettaton squeals with joy.

“Oh darling! We made the front page! We’re headlining! This is the highest point of my career to date!”

“Hey, Sans! No fair!” Papyrus stomps. “I want a newspaper with a picture of my cool friend and favorite robot on the front to commemorate this moment too!”

“No problem, bro. Take mine,” Sans says, handing the newsprint to his brother.

Now it’s Papayrus’ turn to squeal like a school girl. He unceremoniously drops Mettaton’s legs and swipes the newspaper from his brother’s hand. “This is the greatest day of my life! My cool best friend is friends with a famous super star, which means I’m friends with a famous superstar by vicarious extension!”

He turns to you, hope in his eye sockets.

“Hey, pal? Mettaton? Do you think you could both autograph this for me?”

“Of course, darling! Bring it here!”

“Uh, sure. Anyone got a pen?”

Borrowing a pen from Alphys, you put your signature above your head, and then pass it to Mettaton, before remembering his current state.

“Er, do you need help holding the pen?”

“No need! Bring the newspaper close to my beautiful face.”

You do as instructed. Mettaton sucks his lips in, then puckers them out and smooches the space next to his image.

“Mwah! There we are!” He says craning his head back, and you pull the paper away to find a silvery blue lipstick mark.

Papyrus shrieks with joy when you hand him back the newspaper.

“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!” Papyrus says squeezing you in a hug so tight that your lungs threaten to collapse, before letting you pass out. He twirls around and raises the newspaper high above his head to admire it.

“Hang on to that autograph, darling, because it’s the only one of its kind. I’ll be worth a fortune one day!” Mettaton winks.

“As if I’d ever sell this!” Papyrus scoffs. “This picture here commemorates the exact moment when my super cool best friend and super cool robot idol made their break out performance and went from rivals to allies! This is the greatest gift anyone has ever given me! I’ll cherish it for as long as I live!”

You realize, too late, to warn Papyrus to knock on wood for such overconfidence, but either the universe like a cruel joke,

“Arf! Arf!”

Or fate does not like to be tempted,

“Arf! Arf!”

Or maybe a certain little someone had an ear for hubris and just loved to wreak chaos wherever he went.

“ARF ARF ARF!”

Three quick barks are all the warning he gives as he darts through your legs. From out of nowhere, the small white dog leaps from the crowd and snatches the newspaper from Papyrus’ raised hands.

At first no one says anything- too dumbfounded by the sheer fact this tiny toy mutt cleared a vertical leap ten times his height.

The annoying dog does a graceful half turn in the air and lands with masterful precision, back into his signature play bow, facing the flabbergasted group.

There’s a tense moment as he stares you down with that devilish canine grin of his. And maybe the wind had blown the fur on his face the wrong way for a second, or maybe a cinder got in his eye, or maybe, just maybe the dog knowingly-

and intentionally-

winked at you.

“GET! HIM!” Papyrus explodes and tears after the pooch.

Apparently not understanding Papyrus’ rage, the dog wags his tail harder as the screaming skeleton runs up to him to play. Bursting with overstimulation, he races off, running circles around the other monsters, faking lefts and rights to trip Papyrus up and even running back through the skeleton’s legs. Yelling in borderline mania, Papyrus closes in on the dog, coils his legs beneath him, makes a desperate lunge with outstreched hands- and falls just short of grabbing the pooch, spilling to the ground.

The dog stops, play-growling and panting simultaneously so that it sounded suspiciously like huffing laughter, before skipping off in the direction of Waterfall.

“Noooo!” Papyrus wails, face down in the dirt. “I can’t! He’s won! This is the last straw!”

“Never fret, darling!” Mettaton says. “It’s not the end of the world!”

“Yeah, Papyarus,” You console him. “It’s gonna be okay.”

“No you don’t understand!” Papyrus pounds on the earth, throwing a tantrum on the floor. “That dog is always stealing MY things! MY action figures! MY cellphone! MY special attacks! NEVER anyone else’s! He intentionally went after MY newspaper! There are dozens being circulated right now, but he had to have that one because it was MINE! And knowing him, he’s probably running off to line is crate with it!”

“Darling! Don’t worry!” Mettaton assures. “We can get you another newspaper and I can autograph it again!”

Papyrus is silent for a long minute as he laments to the soil. “Fine,” he sighs at last when he regains his composure. “Though it won’t be as great as the original. This one just won’t have the same sentimental value, but I guess it would still suffice as a memento...”

Picking up Mettaton’s limbs once again, your group finally makes it inside Alphys’ lab where she guides you and the others to her upper balcony to deposit his pieces.

“Hup! There you go!” Undyne huffs as she slips Mettaton back into his docking station.

“Oh yes!” the robot sighs once plugged in. “That feels miles better already. Thank you, darlings.”

“Th-thanks for your help, Undyne,” Alphys stutters. You place Mettaton’s arms on the table while Papyrus drops off the legs. Is it your imagination, or is there a rosy hue on Alphys’ face? It could just be due to exertion from lifting Mettaton’s heavy parts, but the dreamy adoration shining in the royals scientist’s eyes as she watches Undyne stretch makes you think otherwise.

“Heh! Anything for you Alphys!” Undyne beams, her smile wider than you’ve ever seen. You blink, suddenly remembering the last conversation you had with the royal guard and Kid before you parted ways, and the teasing you heard from Bratty and Catty. Silently, you study the two out of the corner of your eye, noting the way they shyly brush hands and awkwardly fidget, and a realization hits you like a ton of bricks.

“You like her don’t you?” you ask the scientist when Undyne moves a ways off.

Alphys jumps. "W-what?! Wh-who told you!?”

“No one. I figured it out for myself just now. And, well, I guess it was pretty obvious when you said Undyne’s name to Bratty and Catty, too, but I didn’t make the connection then.”

“W-w-well d-d-don’t go telling anyone! Especially Undyne! Just the thought of her laughing at me makes me nauseated.”

“Laugh at you? Why do you think she’d do that?”

“Look at me!” Alphys throws her hands in the air. “I’m already a huge science nerd! She’d never want to be with a geek like me! All my statistics say so!”

“Says who?”

“Says ever media trope and dating simulator ever! When has the jock EVER hooked up with the nerd? It’s statistically impossible! Just… just keep it to yourself, will you? Please?”

Reluctantly you nod, and Alphys seems satisfied. You keep your eyes trained on her as she moves closer to Mettaton to back up his coding, then you uncross your fingers from behind your back.

You tiptoe around Alphys and Undyne and head back down stairs where Papyrus and Sans chat.

“Papyrus, I have a problem and I need your help,” you tell him.

“Fear not, friend! For I, the Great Papyrus, shall find a solution! Now tell me of this trouble!”

“It’s Alphys and Undyne. I think they’re friend zoning each other.”

“I… I am afraid I don’t follow,” Papyrus admits. “Alphys and Undyne have always been great friends! Why is being in the friend zone an issue?”

“Because they both want to be in the date zone but neither will tell the other, and they don’t know how the other feels about them.”

Papyrus gasps as if horror struck. “I see! Yes, this is a very serious problem indeed!”

“I need your help to get one to admit to the other how they feel. Then they’d both be happy.”

“Noble plan!” Papyrus says, giving you a fist bump. “And I have the perfect idea to get them together! Let me run home and get a plate of my spaghetti and meatballs. Sans, can you play the accordion?”

“No, but I can play the trombone.”

“Close enough!”

“Um, how is any of that supposed to get Undyne and Alphys to confess their feelings for each other?” you ask.

“Don’t worry! I saw this in a movie with dogs once! The lovely couple share spaghetti and end up kissing! Viola! Instant relationship!”

“Um, I was more or less thing something along the lines of forging a note from one of them to give to the other, and I was wondering if you could help me write it, since neither of them seems brave enough to do it themselves.”

“Also a brilliant idea!” Papyrus claps, and begins searching Alphys’ desk for blank paper. “We may have the best luck if we impersonate Alphys. Undyne’s writing style is a bit too flowery to imitate, with all her pink poetry and what not.”

“Purple prose,” Sans corrects.

“That too!” Papyrus smiles, placing a wad of paper and pencils between the three of you. “Okay! How do we flatter a fish?”

“Run over it a second time,” Sans quips.

“SANS!” Papyrus interjects while you barely contain your giggles. “…That was, admittedly, a really good joke, but slightly inappropriate for our current situation! But I like your enthusiasm! Keep it up, brother! We will woo Undyne yet!”

Grabbing a pen and paper, you begin jotting down as many cheesy pickup lines and science puns as you can think of.

--

It’s barely twenty minutes later when Undyne decides to take her leave, much to your dismay. You and Papyrus have only written one draft of your love note, but it will have to do.

“Well, I guess I’d better be going, then.” Undyne says as she moves towards the exit. “See you around sometime, Alphys?”

“Uh, s-sure Undyne!” Alphys fidgets, like she’s dying to say something else, but can’t find the words. “O-our usual anime night?”

“Sounds like a plan!” Undyne says, but you can tell it’s forced, like she want to say more as well, but can’t find the nerve. “See ya on your rounds tomorrow, Papyrus. Sans.” She nods at them. “And I guess… good luck with Asgore, kid.”

Undyne leaves through the front door and Alphys sighs. “W-well, I guess I’d better get started on reattaching Mettaton’s legs…” with a defeated exhale, she heads back upstairs.

Once you’re alone with the skeletons, you give them a nod. They nod in return and pass you the note. You flash thumbs up and run out the front door to catch up with Undyne.

“Undyne! Wait!” You shout as she makes her way to the ferry, waving the note above your head. “Alphys forgot to give you this before you left! She said it was very important and that you had to read it right away!”

You hand Undyne the letter and she opens it without hesitation. Her eye scans the page, creased with seriousness before her brow raises in surprise. She blinks a couple times and rereads it again, slower this time as she absorbs the words.

“Wow… I can’t believe this…” She says looking at you. Your spirits rise with hope. “I can’t believe… you’d thought I’d actually fall for this crap!”

And just like that, you’re hopes are crushed. Panicked, you try to back away, but Undyne presses closer to you, jabbing you in the chest with one finger. “What’s the big deal, punk?! Everyone knows Alphys’ handwriting is worse than chicken scratch! She’d never write this legibly, and not to mention in PAPYRUS FONT! Why under the earth are you trying to impersonate her and send me fake love letters?”

“Because she won’t do it herself!” you huff. “She’s crushing just as hard on you as you are on her, but she doesn’t have the nerve to tell you!”

"Wait, who told you I have a crush on her!?” Undyne demands, recoiling in horror.

“Oh, come on, it’s clearly obvious to any monsters with eyes that you two like each other,” you snort, crossing your arms in indignation.

“Wait…so what you’re saying is that Alphys… feels the same way about me?”

“Yeah, but she thinks if she tells you, you’ll turn her down or worse, that you’ll laugh at her. She already thinks you just put up with her weird interests to be a good friend.”

“That’s ludicrous! I’d NEVER laugh at her for what she’s passionate about! It’s what I love about her the most!” Undyne grips your shoulder as if ready to shake some sense into you.

“Then why don’t you tell HER that?” you retort.

The pupil in Undyne’s eye dilates, as if seeing clearly for the first time.

“You’re… you’re right! I DO have to tell her! And now that I know she shares the same feelings as I do, I don’t have to worry about her turning ME down!”

Without warning, Undyne grabs you by the arms and lifts you off the ground.

“C’mon I gotta tell her I know and I feel the same way! I gotta tell her everything!”

Undyne tucks you under one arm like a football and takes off at mach speed. If feels like you only blink once before you’re back at the lab, where Undyne drops you to pry open the doors when they don’t open fast enough.

“ALPHYS!” Undyne shouts, standing proudly in the door way, dramatically back lit from Hotland’s glow. “I have something very important to tell you! A confession, if you will!”

“U-Undyne??” Alphys jumps from her computer chair. “Y-y-you’re back! I-I-I wasn’t expecting you to come back so soon! I-Is something wrong?”

“Yes! Alphys, I am afraid I’m sick.”

“You are? Well, quick, come sit over here and I can give you a diagnostic-“

“-SICK OF KEEPING MY FEELINGS TOWARDS YOU A SECRET!”

Alphys pales and you don’t blame her. You thought Undyne was going to be gentler about this. You didn’t expect Undyne’s confession to be so… abrasive. Undyne sounded more like she was about to command you to do a hundred pushups instead of confess her crush. She storms over and lifts Alphys up until they’re eye level.

“Alphys! Ever since the day I met you in the dump, I saw the dedication in your eyes! The passion you had for the work you did, and the things that inspired you! That fervor! That zeal! Your ability to accomplish anything you put your mind to! It’s infectious!”

“U-Undyne, I never knew you felt that way about me!”

“Alphys, it’s your dedication to your goals that inspires me! It’s what I love most about you!”

“Y-you do?”

“Yes! And I would be greatly honored if you gave me the privilege to be that partner to help you achieve those goals!”

“I-I-I… y-yes! Yes, Undyne!” Alphys cries out in delight, wiping away tears of joy. “I-I would love nothing more!”

“My, this certainly seems cause for celebration!” Mettaton says from the upper level, having overheard the conversation below. “This day has been just full of dramatic revelations, hasn’t it? All in favor of a little festivity?”

“I would, but I really should be going now,” you say. Your work here is done, and you’ve still got a king to meet.

“Darling, you can’t leave just yet!” Mettaton insists. “You must stick around for the after party where we’ll do Q and As and talk to the press, strike up some brand deals, and then following that is the after-after party where we’ll shoot the behind the scenes 'Making Of' special, and then there’s the after-after-after party where you can only get in if you know someone who knows someone-”

“And d-don’t forget,” Alphys says from within Undyne’s embrace. “There are still throngs of people out there in the streets. I-It’d be impossible to get back to the MTT resort without being mobbed by your new fans looking for an autograph… H-how about you wait it out here for a while?”

“Yeah, punk!” Undyne adds. “Alphys and I can finally show you what anime is!”

“Oh! And we can finally have that sleep over! For real this time!” says Papyrus.

“Just… one more night, Kid?” Sans asks, clasping a boney hand on your shoulder. “What do you say?”

With four faces looking at you expectantly, it physically hurts to think about disappointing them.

“Alright,” you fold, smiling in good nature. “I guess one more night won’t hurt.”

The impromptu party is thrown together with remarkable speed. Papyrus and Sans are quick to arrange a table full of snacks while Alphys and Undyne queue up at least five movies to watch on her big screen monitor. The first movie on the list is one about dinosaurs trying to find a new home, then it’s followed by a movie about the trials of a baby deer, and after that is a movie about lions in Africa, and after that is another movie about dinosaurs trying to find a new home, except this time the dinosaurs are CGI, and to wrap things up is, finally, an anime about a wolf and a goat. It was a great pain Alphys had to go through not to find anime with humans in it, but she succeeded in the end.

It takes a while for the party to settle, for the thrill to die down and the atmosphere to shift from alert, high energy to a relaxed air where one could just enjoy another’s company. The human hangs around the sidelines around the time the first movie ends, waiting for when either of the two newly announced daters needed a break to catch Alphys alone, and finally manages it when she gets up to refill her popcorn.

“Hey Alphys?” The human says carefully, not wanting to draw too much attention to themselves while Undyne laughed at some anecdote Papyrus retold.

“W-what’s up?” The scientist asks.

“There’s something I need to tell you,” they fiddle with the sleeves of their sweater, clearly nervous. “I’ve been meaning to say this earlier, but I never found the chance with Mettaton constantly getting in the way and all, but… thank you.”

“Th… thank you?” Alphys stammers, completely taken off guard. “For what?”

“For everything,” the human says. “For helping me solve the puzzles, to helping me escape Mettaton, and everything in between.”

“What, that?” Alphys smiles weakly. “Th-that was nothing. I didn’t do anything important. You did all the hard work.”

“But you did!” The human says firmly. “Maybe you don’t believe what you did was that significant, but for the first time since I left Snowdin, I feel like you’re the only one who actually tried to HELP me get home. Everyone else just tried to get in my way to slow me down, but I feel like you made an honest effort to get me through Hotland. I can’t thank you enough for that.”

They smile at her, and Alphys forces a smile back, but she can’t hold it.

They’re… thanking her? But… she HAD tried to slow them down. Honest? But she had lied worst out of any of them.

“S-sure thing,” she says quietly.

“And when I see the king tomorrow it will be all thanks to you.” And the next thing she knows, they’re hugging her, tight and safe and trusting, and she can’t take it. Oh, no. Alphys didn’t deserve this. She didn’t deserve to get the girl of her dreams, she didn’t deserve to be the hero, she didn’t deserve their praise. Not when she's deceived them. Not when she's kept secrets from them- from everyone- worse than anyone could imagine! And when they smile at her, genuine and true, it’s the last straw. The last drop of guilt that makes the dam crack and break, and her outward reputation built on a foundation of lies starts to crumble.

“N… no…” Alphys says grimly, pushing them away. “You shouldn’t.”

“Oh, sorry,” the human apologizes, thinking they’ve invaded her personal space. “I didn’t mean to-“

“No, not that.” Alphys says, gripping her upper arms. “You… you shouldn’t be thanking me. I’m… I’m no better than anyone else you’ve met. In fact, I’m probably the worst of them all.”

“What?” the human laughs nervously, probably wondering if this is some elaborate self-deprecating joke. “Of course you are!”

“No, you don’t understand!” Alphys sniffs, raising her voice, and other heads turn her way. “I’m probably the least honest monster you’ve met so far! I-I’ve been lying to you from the very beginning!”

“Alphys…” Sans says in a cautious tone.

“Lying about what?” The human asks, worried.

“About everything! I-I-I was working with Mettaton the whole time!” The scientist sobs. “Y-y-you were never in any real danger up until the hotel. All those traps he caught us in were set up. I knew how to get out of them from the very beginning.”

“What… what do you mean?” The human takes one step forward towards her, and she takes three steps back, determined to keep distance between them. Her friends nervously get to their feet, worry clearly on their face, but unsure about moving forward if it would only push her away.

“Alphys?” Undyne says cautiously from the other side of the couch.

“A-a-and I’ve lied about helping you! I was trying to slow you down just as much as everyone else! In fact, all this time I was really studying you, because-!”

Across the room, Alphys’ phone blares an alarm. All the monsters in the room jump at the sudden noise, being as tense as a loaded bow string.

“It’s six o’clock,” Alphys gasps, hands flying to her muzzle. “Oh no, I forgot to give them dinner!”

“Alphys…?” the kid speaks up nervously, clearly distressed about the sudden outbreak. “Are you okay?”

Alphys looks at them sadly, and then to her friends who all wear pleading, desperate expressions.

“No, I’m not,” the lizard monster says sadly, inching towards the “restroom” along the north wall. “M-my lies go deeper than anyone realizes. I didn’t just deceive you; I deceived everyone in the Underground and I can’t take it anymore. I’ve got to… take care of something now, and whatever happens next, please don’t follow me.”

The “restroom” door parts and Alphys backs into it. The door slides back down before anyone has a chance to react.

“Alphys!” Everyone leaps for the door, scrambling over and around furniture and work benches, but none get to it in time. Undyne bangs on the metal panel so hard that it starts to dent, but still they don’t give.

“DAMNIT! Why won’t the door open?”

There’s a soft ding, and a faint light shows up on the restroom sign to the right of the door. It’s then that you notice that the restroom label is slightly crooked and… peeling?

Curious, you reach for the corner of the label, betting on a hunch, and tear it away to reveal a panel with two letters and a row of colored dots between them.

“G and B…” You read out loud. The letter ‘B’ is currently illuminated.

“Hey, this isn’t a bathroom!” Papyrus says. “It’s… an elevator?”

“But where does it go?”

As soon as the question is asked, the lights of the sign begin to shift, tracing backwards from B to the G. It chimes a pleasant note when it reaches the ground level once more and opens its doors expectantly.

“Down, apparently,” Sans notes. “Should we go after her?”

“Well DUH, dummy!” Undyne says, stepping in without a second thought. “You heard how upset Alphys was! We gotta make sure she’s okay!”

“Agreed!” Papyrus seconds the notion. “Alphys is our friend! We should be there for her if she needs us!”

Everyone piles into the elevator. There are no buttons on the inside. Instead, the doors automatically close and the lift descends, lowering far too slow for anyone’s comfort. All four occupants are tense and antsy as they try not to bump into anyone else in the tight space. Everyone keeps their eyes straight forward, anticipating the second the doors reopen.

At last the elevator rumbles to a steady halt and the door slides open. The group stumbles out of the lift, into a dimly lit hallway that echoes with bad vibes that instantly give everyone second thoughts about coming down here. A wave of cold, musty air hits your face as you step forward into the dim, murky hallway. Motion sensor monitors blink awake as you pass. You only pick up snippets as you try to keep up with the group, but you think they mention something about research on fallen monsters, human souls, and flowers.

“What is this place?” Papyrus asks, marching down the hallway.

“It’s like… some sort of sublayer of Alphys’ lab,” Undyne says, pointing to the blueprints on the wall and the shelves of beakers and vials. “Sans, you used to work with Alphys, right? Have you ever seen this before?”

“No, I haven’t,” Sans says mystified. “My main area of research was the CORE. To be honest, I never really saw how Alphys’ “research station” on the ground floor was considered a good set up for soul research, but this… THIS is a true lab.”

An ominous warning feeling prickles at the back of your neck in trepidation. You avert your eyes and keep your head low as you pick up the pace. The corridor opens into a lobby, complete with fake ficuses, fold up chairs and a vending machine. Across the other side of the room is another gaping doorway leading into darkness. The four members of the party stare at it. In the silence, scraping noises could be heard in the distance.

“I don’t like the looks of this,” Sans says.

“Well, there can’t possibly be anything… bad… down here,” You point out. “I-It’s just dark. We know Alphys is down here, so there can’t be anything dangerous nearby… right?”

“Yeah! We can’t wimp out now! It’s just Alphys!” Undyne says. “C’mon! Let’s find her!” And with that, Undyne forges ahead into darkness.

The hallway immediately turns right as it guides you past rows of locked offices, the names on each door long since peeled off or have been scratched out by some resentful claws. At the end of the hall is a door labeled “Dormitory”, and it’s slightly ajar. Is it your ears playing tricks on you, or do you hear breathing coming from the room beyond it?

“Looks like she went this way.” Undyne says, grabbing the doorknob and pushing it open. The hinges whimper only a little, as if frightened they’ll be punished if they make too much noise. A strange mist curls at your ankles, curiously poking at your footwear.

The four of you enter. It takes a while for your eyes to adjust. In the gloom, Undyne’s eye has dilated until her black pupil almost obscure her yellow sclera. San’s eye lights seem to have grown as well, but only cast about as much light as a glow stick in the dark.

When you can finally distinguish shapes in the low light, you discover the room is filled with medical cots, arranged in perfect columns and rows. Along the far wall, you spy more hallways branching off into the unknown. The four of you fan out, standing shoulder to shoulder. You take a step forward and your foot kicks a bowl. Bits of dry dog food scatter on the floor. You can’t shake the feeling you’re being watched.

“This place is huge,” Sans whistles as you creep along the northern wall. Your party turns north into the first branching hallway you find, but before long the corridor splits again at a T intersection. Hesitantly, you all look down each fork as far as you can see. “Should we split up to look for Alphys?”

“You dolt!” Undyne scolds him, flicking him on the top of the skull with her thumb and index finger. “Haven’t you ever watched a scary movie in your life? You NEVER split up from the group! There’s safety in numbers!”

“Yes, but we could cover more ground, Undyne!” Papyrus points out.

“Yeah, not to mention the whole “arguing about not splitting up thing” is becoming a trope in of itself,” Sans adds.

“It’s way too dark to see safely down here,” you add, siding with Undyne. “This place could be a labyrinth. We could get lost.”

“Yeah, but if we split up, one of us might get hurt, or something worse, and no one would be able to help!”

“We could travel in pairs!” Papyrus suggests.

“If we all stick together we could just as easily all get lost at once compared to if we split up,” Sans notes. “Mathematically speaking, spreading out is more beneficial to our cause. After all, it’s just us and Alphys down here, right?”

The question is rhetorical, but no one makes a noise of agreement. Everyone’s eyes shift side to side in uncertainty.

It’s just you and Alphys down here. And maybe if you say it enough times, you’ll start to believe it.

“R-right. Pairs it is, then. Papyrus, you and your brother start searching the west corridor. Me and the kid will head east.”

There’s a silent nod of agreement as your group splits into pairs. Turning right, you take one last look as the skeleton brothers’ head west before following Undyne into the pitch black hallway east. The air seems to drop in temperature the further you go.

“Alphys!” you call out into the darkness, your voice reverberating off the walls. “Please come out! We just want to talk with you!”

“SShhhh, punk!” Undyne hisses. “You gotta be quiet!”

“Why?” You ask. “Aren’t we the only ones down here?”

“Well, yeah! I mean, I think. Ugh! I don’t know anymore! The longer we’re down here, the more I feel like we’re not alone…”

“But we can’t be quiet if we’re trying to find her! How else will she know we’re here?”

Undyne can’t seem to find a response to that, and instead marches on.

Side by side you tiptoe down the hallway. Half way down, you unconsciously reach up and take the warrior’s scaly hand for comfort. You don’t even notice what you’ve done until Undyne is squeezing your hand back for her own reassurance. You hold her tight, not wanting to lose her in the low visibility.

The path you’ve chosen ends in a dead end room packed floor to ceiling with cooling fans on two of the three walls, quietly emitting an ever-present hum. At the far end of the room is a switch.

“Light switches?” you say optimistically.

“A light switch? All the way down here in this dead end hallway on the other side of the room?” Undyne says skeptically.

“Hey, you never know,” you argue and go up and flip it.

The monotonous thrum of the fans dies down instead as their blades still, leaving the room more deathly silent than before.

“Tch,” Undyne clicks her tongue as she studies the ceiling. “Well, it was worth a shot, I guess.”

“Yeah, I guess this means we can go back the other way and meet up with the guys now, huh?”

A low rumble sounds behind you.

“What was that?” you say quickly.

“Maybe it was just one of the fans who didn’t get the memo about turning off?”

The grumble from across the room turns into a growl. The two of you spin around on your heels to catch an amorphous form emerging from the darkness.

There’s… a creature lurching towards you from across the room, but it doesn’t look or behave like any monster you’ve met so far. Its body is stark white and dripping like melting snow. An ever-changing, uncountable number of limbs protrude from his body, sprouting and retracting back into its mass, a self-contained shadow, darker than darkness is collected under its legs with glowing eyes peering at you from between its shifting limbs. The bulk of it tapers off into one lump you dare call a head, but instead of a face, there is just a circle of blackness with no texture or shape to hint its depth, just a pure space of void that is aimed right at you. The creature is huge, bigger than you and Undyne combined.

And it’s blocking the only exit.

“St-stay back!” Undyne shouts, throwing her arm in front of you like a shield. You are not sure if the statement was directed at you or the creature. She summons a spear to look threatening. “What are you, and did you do anything to Doctor Alphys, you freak?!”

The thing in front of you seems confused as well. Its many legs jerk and spasm as it clamors toward you to inspect you closer.

“I’m warning you!” Undyne yells, pointing her quivering spear in its general direction. “T-take another step and you’ll get to know this spear up close and personal!”

The beast makes a snuffling sound, the void on its head constricting with each huff of air. Two protrusions on its head perk up as it begins to erratically inch closer.

“H-hey! Didn’t you hear me, freak? By order of the Royal Guard, stand down! I’m giving you to the count of three to back off or I. Will. Fire!”

Undyne lifts her spear high and stands at the ready. In the same moment the beast in front of you crouches as if ready to pounce. Its whole body quivers violently.

“One…!”

You narrow your eyes. Why is there something so familiar in the way that it’s poised? The tilt of its head, how its hindquarters are up in the air…

“Two!”

The wag of… its… tail- oh god you know what this is.

“Thr-!” “Undyne! Don’t hurt it!” you tackle the guard in a panic, barreling into her waist just as she looses her spear. The weapon goes flying far off target to the left, and the creature immediately spins around and lunges after it.

“Punk, what the hell???” Undyne screams at you. “That thing was about to attack us!”

“No, it’s not,” you say as you get up on your shaking knees. “I-it’s a dog, Undyne. It’s just a dog.” Your voice won’t stop trembling.

“A dog!? Brat, I work with dogs, and I can tell you that thing ISN’T a dog!”

“B-but it is! Watch,” you blow a shrill whistle, then turn your attention to the room’s exit, and just as you figured, the white mass comes charging back. It skitters to a halt, its head turning to each of you, not sure who summoned it. You step forward to catch his attention.

“H-hey boy,” you coo, patting your knees with all the bravery you can muster.

“Sh-show Undyne here that you’re just another old pooch. Come here!”

The amalgamate’s body goes ridged at the command, before its ears fold back and it leaps forward, It lets out an ecstatic ear-piercing shriek as it knocks you flat, its tail wagging so fast it’s just a blur. It rubs its face all over your sweater, coating your shirt in dog hair and a cold aqueous gel you’d rather not think about.

Behind you, Undyne screams and grabs the collar of your shirt to yank you out of harm’s way.

“Brat, are you trying to get yourself killed?!” Undyne says, holding you two feet off the ground.

“No, look! He’s calming down!” You fight back. “Really! Try petting him!”

“I’m not going anywhere NEAR that thing and neither are you! What if this hell spawn ate Alphys?”

The culmination of canines whines as if struck and cowers, placating.

“It’s okay boy, or… girl, or whatever you are. You’re not in trouble. You’re a good dog.”

Seeking affection, the amalgamate crawls closer and stretches out its neck to meet your out reaching hand. You ruffle the fur on the top of its head and the monster’s body shakes with joy.

Half way through your pet, the monster pulls back and begins to heave, and its whole body spasming as it hacks something up from what you only hope is its stomach.

With a violent cough, Undyne’s blue spear falls out of the hole in its face and onto the floor, coated in slobber.

The three of you stare at it for a second, and then the amalgamate puffs up its chest proudly.

“Ha ha, see? It is a dog,” you tell Undyne. “It brought your spear back for you.”

“Well if it’s a dog then it should be able to find someone by scent!” Undyne says. Her shoulders un-tense at last, and she almost looks impressed at the monster. “Hey, mutt! Find doctor Alphys!”

The monster’s ears twitch at the name, but it doesn’t move.

“Go on! Sniff her out!” Undyne repeats.

The canine tilts its head.

Undyne rolls her eye. “You know; FETCH.”

The amalgamate leaps to its feet and does a one-eighty so fast that its claws skit on the tile, making it cartoonishly run in place for a second. The creature lets out a bark so deep, you feel it in your bones. When at last it finds traction, the amalgamate tears off, its rear end fishtailing and crashing into the wall of fans as it lunges for the door way.

“Guess we’d better follow it,” you say. “It’s as good a lead as any.”

You catch up to the amalgamate in the hallway. Its face is so low to the ground its almost touching it as it snorts at the floor, head swiveling back and forth as it searches for the scent. Its face traces over one spot before it slingshots back, and studies it intently. After a tense moment of sniffing, its head comes up and it brays, loud and deafening when it finds a trail and takes off towards it.

If the halls weren’t so narrow, you don’t know if you’d have been able to keep up with the amalgamate. Its feet constantly scramble to keep it up right, as if not acquainted with having so many legs. Sometimes the amalgamate doesn’t even stay on the floor, instead choosing to crawl along the walls and ceiling as it snakes through the tunnel.

Making a hard right, the canine amalgamate leads you through the showers and into a room lined floor to ceiling with shelves of video tapes, where it proceeds to spend several minutes sniffing the shelves.

“She must’ve been here recently,” you note, eyeing the strange VHSs and old TV in the middle of the room.

“Well, she isn’t here now,” Undyne says, before the amalgamate takes off once more. “Come on! We can’t lose it!”

Ahead the amalgamate makes a sharp left, skirting a pit so deep, you can’t see the bottom of it. The amalgamate disappears down another hall, only to have screams answer a second later.

“Sans and Papyrus!” you gasp. “Quick, we gotta stop them before they hurt the dog!”

You race into the room as fast as you can. “Stop! Heel!” you preemptively shout, only to find a cage of blue bones trapping the amalgamate.

“Nobody move!” Undyne orders as she enters the room.

“No need to fear!” Papyrus says when he catches the sight of your confused faces. “I have detained the threat! We are uninjured and safe!”

“It’s not a threat, Papyrus. It’s a dog!” you explain.

“He won’t hurt you.” Undyne grunts. “Typical dog. Can’t stay focused if there’re bones nearby!”

The amalgamate twists around in circles. You can’t tell if it’s fascinated or confused by the blue bones, but then to everyone’s surprise, it hunkers down close and then the void on its face begins to expand. With a great intake of air, like the magnetic pull of a black hole, the amalgamate inhales one wall of bones into its orifice, completely unfazed.

“Well then!” Papyrus says only slightly perturbed. “I should have anticipated that bone attacks would have no effect on a dog monster!”

The amalgamate lets out another earth shaking bark before pouncing on Papyrus.

“Hey! Paws off the little brother!” Sans shouts, his eye flaring blue.

“Sans! No! It’s okay!” you scream. “It’s just a dog! It won’t hurt him!”

Beneath the pile of white sludge, papyrus shrieks a bone rattling cry. “Help! I’m being affectionately licked to my death!”

“A dog?” echoes Sans, eyeing the enormous conglomerate of canines. “If that’s true, what kind of dog, then?”

“Uhh, mixed breed?” you offer. In the distance, you think you hear a snicker and a shiver runs down your back. Blinking, you momentarily put the thought to the side but keep your eyes peeled. “It likes to be pet and knows how to fetch, at the very least. We were hoping it could help us find Alphys, but it looks like he caught the scent of you two instead.”

“Leave it to a dog to find a bunch of bones!” Undyne snorts. “You two having any better luck?”

“No sign of Alphys so far,” Sans reports. “It was really foggy in here and we couldn’t see anything for the life of us, but then it suddenly cleared up. Maybe a second look around wouldn’t hurt.”

“As much as I’d love to find Alphys,” Papyrus grumbles, affectionately stroking the canine monster, “I can’t get any searching done if I’m constantly being assaulted by over excited canines! Can we please get this guy out of the room?”

“Sorry, Paps. You know the rules.” Sans shrugs. “Once you pet a dog, the pact is sealed. He’s yours now.”

“But he’s impeding our search and rescue efforts!”

“How about we regroup?” Undyne suggests. “It seems pretty clear this mutt isn’t going anywhere without you, Papyrus so how about you and I take him back to the dormitory where he can stay out of the way, while Sans and the punk keep looking for Alphys?”

“UGH! Fine! I will be on dog-sitting duty!” Papyrus grumbles, wiggling his way out from beneath the amalgamate. He looks over his shoulder blades at you and Sans as he leaves the room with the canine in tow. “You two! Be quick about it! We don’t have all night to find Alphys!”

“No worries, bro,” Sans assures him. “We’re keeping our eye-sockets out for her.”

Undyne and Papyrus groan as they exit the room. But from somewhere behind you and Sans-

“Ha… ha…”

That uneasy shiver runs down your spine again. Sans must feel it too, for his eye lights shift from side to side as he tries to pin point the haunting laughter.

“Who’s there?” he flinches, looking sharply over his shoulder. In the very back of the room, you think you see a figure wince and withdraw into the shadows behind a row of refrigerators. Whatever is over there sure isn’t Alphys, but if it’s just as scared of you as you are of it, then it can’t be all that dangerous.

“Sans…” you say quietly. You point to the last fridge. Sans nods. “No sudden movement. Turn around… very… slowly.”

You creep over to the ice box and slowly peer around one of its sides while Sans does the same on the other. Huddled in a corner is another amalgamate, pale blue and white. Timidly it squawks when it realizes its cornered, shedding snowflakes from its ruffled feathers and forcing you to back away.

“Hey there,” Sans says softly to the creature. “Sorry if I spooked ya. I didn’t mean nothin’ by it. Mind coming out?”

“Who’s … there…? Who’s… there…?” The monster mimics Sans in a tired voice. “Knock… knock?”

“Is…. Is this a knock, knock joke?” Sans asks, beads of sweat forming on his brow. “’Cause I’m great at those, but it doesn’t’ really work if you tell ‘em backwards like that.”

“Maybe WE should try telling the knock, knock joke?” you suggest, inching closer to Sans. “It did laugh at your eye socket pun.”

“Worth a shot.” Sans shrugs. “Can’t do any harm, anyway. Knock, knock.”

There is a moment of silence before the monster pokes its head out from around the side of the fridge again, and you get a clear look at it for the first time. Its eyes are sagging and vacant. It’s got a beak and wings like a bird, and much like the canine amalgamate, it seems to melting, or, err, molting in this case. Parts of it seem more plant-like than feather like. A cold mist clouds around its beak when it exhales, and the general air around it is so cold…

“Who… is… there?” It asks curiously.

“Their snow.”

“Their… snow… who?”

“There’s snow door bell, so I have to knock!”

“Ha… ha… ha...” the melting monster chuckles, feathers and slush dripping from its amorphous body. “Sn… snowy…”

Clumsily, the amalgamate steps forward and you have to fight back a gasp of shock. In better lighting you can see the monster more clearly. It looks like some hybrid of the Snowdrake you met in Snowdin combined with the Vegetoids you know in the Ruins.

“Hey, I think it worked.” You say let’s try another.”

“No problem, kiddo,” Sans winks. “I can dish out jokes for days. Listen to this one- where does a snowman keep his money?”

“Where…?” The amalgamate asks.

“In a snowbank!”

“Ha… ha… Thank you…” the amalgamate laughs.

“Pardon us, but I didn’t realize you hybrid monsters could talk.” You ask quietly. “Who are you?”

“I… don’t… remember…” It says, ruffling its feathers. “Got… got lost… so… long ago…. Where…. Where did… they… go? I… need to… go home… want to… go home… Where is home?”

The more it talks, the more agitated the amalgamate becomes and the less definite its shape holds, like it’s losing itself.

“Hey! Hey! No worries,” Sans says comfortingly. “We can help ya. No need to fall apart on me.”

“Heh… heh…” the amalgamate smiles weakly. “I… remember… now.”

“You do?” You say hopefully. “What happened to you?”

“We… I… Missssess drake… me.” The monster says, trying to keep its words straight. “F… fallen… down… The doctor… said… she could… help…”

You stifle a gasp. Beside you Sans goes ridged.

“Mrs. Drake? Snowdrake’s mother?” you say nervously.

“Ah… little… Snowy… so funny…” she smiles fondly. “Just… like his… father.”

“Mr. Drake…” Sans says absently. He turns to you. “His comedy routine’s been in the pits since his wife fell down and his son ran away from home.”

“Did Alphys do this to you?” You ask sadly, looking at the depressing amalgamate.

“Al… phys… doctor…. Alphys said… stay determined… she… would… help…”

“My God…” Sans says. His eyes go dangerously dark. “I knew Alphys had wanted to run tests on monsters, but I didn’t think she’d do THIS to you.”

“Not… her… fault…” Mrs. Drake says. “Not… her… fault… no… one’s… fault… no… one… knew…”

The amalgamation begins to shiver again, becoming upset once more.

“It’s okay, Mrs. Drake,” You comfort her. “Do you know where Alphys is now?”

“Know?... No…” the amalgamate says.

“We’re gonna help you get home,” Sans promises. “Don’t worry, we won’t be mad at Alphys.”

“Let’s take her back to the dormitory with the others,” you say, lending her a hand. Mrs. Drake places a wing into it, and at once your hand goes numb as it’s enveloped in the strange gelatinous sludge.

“Might as well. This way is a dead end.” Sans notes, nodding at the room. “Alphys wasn’t down this direction. Was there more to explore where you found the pooch?”

“No, but I think there was another hallway that led out the dormitory. We can still go that way.”

You retrace your steps back to the main room with the beds, where you discover Undyne and Papyrus have shoved several cots together for the canine amalgamate to curl up on.

“Sssshhh!” Undyne hisses at you when you enter the room. “We just managed to get Endogeny to calm down, so don’t make any loud noises!”

“Endogeny?”

“Yeah!” Undyne says, pointing to the dog bowl you had kicked when you first came in the room. “That’s their name! Or at least, that’s what Papyrus and I assumed. They respond to anything you call them if you say it in a mushy voice. Isn’t that right, stupid face?” Undyne coos. Endogeny whines ecstatically.

“Wait, where is Papyrus?” Sans says, looking around the room and noticing a lack of brother to be found.

A lump beneath Endogeny’s fur begins to move and a gloved hand pops out between one of its many pairs of legs.

“Over here!” Papyrus says. “It seems Endogeny feels anxious when they do not have a chew toy to cuddle with, so I had to be a substitute.”

“Chew toy?” Sans asks in concern.

“Ah! Do not fret dear brother! I may have been the role of chew toy, but I was not in harm’s way, for Endogeny has no teeth! Or mouth! Or a face for that matter! So there was never any danger!”

“Never mind all that!” Undyne interrupts. “Did’ja find Alphys?”

“No, but we found someone else,” you and Sans step aside to let Mrs. Drake enter the room. “Oh God, another one?” Undyne says.

“It’s Snowdrake’s mom, Undyne,” you explain. “One of the monsters Alphys was trying to prevent from falling down. We think Alphys accidentally did this to them.”

“Wait, these guys are the monsters that Alphys TESTED on?” Undyne shutters. “Then that means… these dogs-“

“Were probably formal guard members.”

Undyne looks at Endogeny with new light. A look of sadness shadows her face. “What did Alphys do?” she whispers sadly.

“Not her fault… not her fault…” Mrs. Drake repeats, shaking. “The doctor… is good… she did not… mean to…”

“Hey, hey,” Sans says, patting the amalgamate’s back the best he can. He has to stop when his hand starts to meld into her form. “We aren’t mad. Just worried and concerned.”

“There’s still one more hallway we haven’t searched yet,” You point out. “Alphys could be down there.”

“I think I’m gonna have to stay here, bucko,” Sans says. “Mrs. Drake seems pretty shaken. I think I’ll keep her company and tell her a few more of my stellar jokes that are out of this world.”

The amalgamate chuckles and begins to grin.

“See? There’s the smile I’m looking for.”

“Okay, then. Undyne?”

“Don’t think I can, punk.” Undyne says. “Endogeny only stays relaxed if someone can maintain a constant petting environment with supplemental head scratches at a Mach Five speed, and if I don’t do it there’s no doubt in my mind Endogeny will go on another rampage that will surely kill hundreds via love tackle. D’you think you’ve got the endurance for that?”

“Uh… I don’t think so.”

“Ah! It looks like it is my turn to go exploring dimly lit corridors with y new best fried!” Papyrus says, squeezing out from under Endogeny’s legs. The amalgamate gives a small grunt of displeasure before rolling over for belly rubs. “Come on, friend! Let us succeed where other great monsters have failed and find the doctor! We shall return triumphant!”

“Okay. We’ll be back as fast as we can, guys!”

You exchange ‘good lucks’ and ‘farewells’ with Sans and Undyne, and take off down the east hall with Papyrus. It’s not long until the dormitory fades out of sight. Ahead of you, the hallway brightens a little, filling your heart with hope, but when you round the corner, you’re met with just another hallway. On the left side, the wall is lined with mirrors that trick your eyes into believe the corridor is actually bigger than it is. On the right side, a row of tables covered with flower pots growing under artificial lights borders the wall. Ah, so that’s why it seemed brighter.

Your heart skips a beat when you recognize the plants grown. They’re golden flowers. Why are there golden flowers way down here? Wait… If… if Alphys had created these amalgamations, then… was it possible she had created other things as well?

“Hey, do you hear that?” Papyrus whispers to you. You listen close and pick up the faintest sound of… a crinkling wrapper?

Stealthily inching forward, you and Papyrus edge the wall. It’s yet another monster, this time with a body of blue and green, with arms of brown and a head of deep purple. It hunches over something in front of you, its head nothing more than a giant mouth and a pair of eyes. Its body is slug-like with two muscular arms and no legs.

“It’s another amalgamate,” Papyrus says.

“Is… is it eating something?” you ask when you hear its jaws crunch and snap. You swallow hard. What if it’s eating- no. No, it couldn’t have. The other amalgamates you’ve met so far have bend nice and friendly, so why would this one be different? Besides, dust doesn’t crunch. “Should we approach it?”

“I think not! It would be rude to strike up a conversation with someone while they have their mouth full!”

You strategize with Papyrus on what to do, when a new noise distracts you from behind. It’s a tapping noise that echoes above you, and you turn around to find a lanky figure emerging from the overhead vents like viscus fluid.

It’s ANOTHER amalgamate, twice the height of you and Papyrus combined. Its body is a mottled color of red and orange, with two skinny legs, a pencil thin neck, a massive, pointy bill and razor sharp wings. It has one eye that makes up all of its face, and when it blinks you can’t help but notice its eyelids are lined with teeth. As soon as the amalgamate sees you, it lets out a blood curdling screech and charges forward.

“Papyrus! Duck!”

The skeleton snatches you up and covers you like a blast shield. “I think it looks more like a stork or a crane, but still definitely avian!” he says in a panic, as the monster rushes past.

The amalgamate doesn’t pay you any mind as it dashes past you and Papyrus, instead going straight for the other amalgamate in the room. The first amalgamate hisses in defiance at the newcomer’s approach, turning its back on the bird as it tries to protect the thing it had been snacking on.

With angry screeching that sounds like twenty different bird calls at once, the bird monster attacks the other with rapid-fire pecks from its beak and raking stomps from its claws. The big lipped monster screams in protest, grabbing the bird’s neck with its muscly arm in an effort to keep it at bay, but it’s no use against the bird’s sheer amount of reach. Flapping its razor wings in retaliation, the bird pecks at the slug-monsters eyes. The assaulted amalgamate shrieks in pain, and releases the bird to cover its face. The attacker, now freed, swoops its head low and snatches at the prize the injured amalgamate had been guarding.

“No, Reaper Bird!” it cries out, it’s voice many-layered like a chorus. “These are Lemon Bread’s! Get your own!”

Reaper Bird raises their head triumphantly, the prize held high out of Lemon Bread’s reach, safely in its serrated jaws. It’s then you can see clearly what they are fighting over.

“It’s… a bag of chips!” you say in disappointed annoyance. With a cry of outrage, Lemon Bread swipes at Reaper Bird’s legs with their thick tail, knocking the thieving amalgamate to the ground. The chips scatter across the floor and the skirmish starts anew.

“They’re fighting over junk food! You tell papyrus. “We have to break it up!”

“Hey! Be careful!” Papyrus warns you as you wiggle free of his grasp.

“Stop! Stop it you two!” You demand, pushing the monsters apart and holding your hands up between them. Reaper Bird screams something that sounds like ten different insults at once at you as it stomps it feet angrily, scratching up the title.

“Listen to them!” papyrus demands, stepping close to your side. “Look at yourselves! You two are clearly adults, yet you can’t even share? Did you learn nothing in Kindergarten?”

Reaper Bird says something that you can’t make out and snaps its beak.

“I’m… I’m sorry, could you run that by me again?” Papyrus says.

Reaper Bird screams and doubles over, contorting its jaw before shouting;

“We are starving!” “Supper is late!” “He took the last bag!”

“The doctor never came,” Lemon bread grumbles in its many toned voice. “Said she would bring dinner, but nobody came. Forgotten about us again. Forgotten forever.”

“That can’t possibly true!” Papyrus scoffs. “If you are a patient of Dr. Alphys, then she would never abandon you!”

“That’s what they all say.” Lemon bread hisses, narrowing their eyes at you.

“H-hey, what’s going on here!” A familiar stuttering voice demands. A wave of relief washes over you when you turn to find Alphys carrying a box full of canned goods “I’m f-f-five minutes late to give you dinner and you start going at each other’s throats? H-have some manners!”

Reaper Bird and Lemon Bread hang their heads apologetically.

“H-here,” Alphys says, passing them each a can of ravioli. “T-take turns using the microwave, a-and cover your bowls with a paper towel so it doesn’t splatter everywhere!” Alphys tells them as the two amalgamates excitedly rush off down the corridor. “A-and Reaper Bird, will you quit turning off all the lights? It’s bad for your eyes to stay in the dark!”

“Florescent lights hurt my eye!” “I am just one big eye!” “I have night vision!” it says all at once.

After they’ve vanished from sight Alphys turns towards you, but doesn’t look you in the eye.

“I’m so sorry you had to see that. That you had to see any of this,” she says quietly. “I-I guess you know the truth now, don’t you? About all the horrible things I’ve done to these monsters. I-it’s okay if you’re angry at me for hiding such terrible lies. I understand…”

“Alphys!” you and Papyrus say in unison as you rush forward to embrace her in a hug.

“Are you okay?”

“Are you hurt?”

“We thought we’d never find you or see you again!”

“We’ve been looking everywhere for you!”

“You… you have?” Alphys blinks confused. “I thought… I thought you’d be angry with me.”

“We’ll admit we’re a little upset, but we were more scared and concerned about you above anything else!” Papyrus says. “We were so worried!”

“Y-you were?”

“Of course! You’re our friend, Alphys!” you tell her matter-of-factly. “We all came down to look for you!”

“You were looking for me?” Alphys parrots, disbelieving. “Why?”

“Is there an echo down here?” You giggle. “We all came looking because we were worried, Alphys. We all care about you and didn’t want to see you get hurt.”

“That’s… That’s so kind of you,” Alphys sniffs. “I- I don’t deserve any of this. Y-you should have just left me here. I d-don’t deserve to be forgiven for what I’ve done!”

“Yes you do, Alphys!” you huff. “So stop putting yourself down like that! Sure, it looks like you’ve done some… questionable things, down here, but whatever you need to confess, we’ll still support you, no matter what, okay?”

“Yeah… yeah, you’re right,” the royal scientist perks up just a little bit and stands a little straighter. “Let’s go back to the main room. I still have to give Endogeny and Mrs. Drake their dinners, a-and I’ve got a lot I need to come clean about to you guys and… and to everyone.”

Alphys follows Papyrus and her lab partner back into the dormitory, albeit reluctantly. Sans, Undyne, Endogeny and Mrs. Drake meet her there. She braces for a bunch of raised voices and accusations and angry questions but instead she is only met with more worry and concern. When the anger she had been preparing herself for ultimately never comes, she finally has a break down.

“This… is what happened to your soul research?”

“Y-yeah,” Alphys sobs. “E-everyone seemed fine at first. I.-I w-was going t-to send them all ho-ome but then when they melted together and st-started to lose their identities, I-I couldn’t do it. A-all their fa-amlies would hate me and blame me, and they’re not wrong! I did this to them! The longer I kept putting off sending them home, the harder it became. Every day I got more angry phone calls, a-and I just ignored it like a c-coward until they eventually gave up and stopped calling.”

In the comfort of Undyne’s arms, surrounded by her closest friends and a dog ready to offer sympathy at a moment’s notice, Alphys recounts her tale, how she extracted determination from the king’s collection of human souls, to injecting monsters with concentrated doses of determination, to hiding them in the basement when the experiment had failed.

Her audience listens patiently, and while not once they ever raise their voice or scold her, Alphys can see the horror and frustration in their eyes at her words.

“Th-that’s why when you thanked me, I p-panicked,” Alphys says to the human. “You… you were the first person to not know of anything I’d done prior, and working together with you was fun! Helping you was fun! You g-genuinely liked me, and for a few moments, I didn’t feel like a disappointment anymore! I remembered what it felt like to be depended on by s-someone, but I knew in my soul that image of me in your mind was smoke and mirrors, and I didn’t deserve that praise. I… I originally liked to you because I wanted to study you, b-but by the end of the day I really did want to be your friend, but if I c-can’t even tell the truth, then how can I ever make a friendship work?”

“So it’s true, then?” The human says, distracted. “You wanted to study me? Mettaton said as much when we had the dance-off, but I thought he was just trying to get in my head.”

“Uh, y-y-yeah,” Alphys sweats. Beneath her, Undyne tenses, and she can feel Sans and Papyrus watching her nervously. “B-b-b-because, I, uh, you, aah…”

“Because I’m a Boss Monster, right?” The human fills in the blank. “My soul is a little stronger than average monsters, right? And you wanted to learn more about it? You couldn’t really do that to Asgore, since you work for him. You wanted to study it to help the other monsters?”

In that moment Alphys realizes she has a choice; to stick to the truth and come clean about EVERYTHING or take part in a lie she hadn’t even started. She realizes then, if she told them the truth, it would hurt them, and that she’d be taking down everyone else with her. All this time she had been lying and keeping secrets to protect herself. Was a lie still just as bad if it was to protect someone else?

“S… something like that,” Alphys says, neither lying flat out, nor telling the truth either. If the kid would offer her a way out, then she would take it. No need to complicate things further. She’d already come clean about most of her lies. The lies of others are a different matter.

“Alphys, I know how you feel, and I know what you’re going through,” The kid tells her. “Because I’m the exact same way. You feel like you’ve screwed up so horribly that there’s nothing you can do about it, that it’s all your fault and there’s no way you can be forgiven no matter how hard you try, but those thoughts are wrong, Alphys.” They glance at Sans. “Someone once told me as long as you own up to your mistakes and do your best to mend them, no one can fault you for bad intentions.”

“Y-y-you really think that?”

“Of course, dummy!” Undyne says, hugging her tight. “We got your back no matter what! As long as you honestly try your hardest to help those around you, we’ll be there to support you!”

Alphys whimpers and sheds a few tears of relief. “Th-thank you guys so much. I-I-I want to be a better person, I really do, and knowing you’ll forgive me for the mess I didn’t mean to cause really helps.”

Gently, Alphys pries Undyne’s arms off of her and gets to her feet. She lets out a sigh, and then stands up tall. “Now that I know you guys don’t blame me, I’m ready to tell the rest of the Underground what happened as well.” She waves the amalgamates to come close. “Come on, everyone. It’s time for me to take you all home.”

[flashbic]

Oh my god Scott/Antonio for the ship thing?

Okay, so, this started out normal enough but then it got WAY LONG, and Tumblr mobile is being a DICK and won’t let me put it under a cut. Still though, it was super fun to write :D

who’s the werewolf andwho’s the hunter

Antonio as the werewolfseems the obvious answer, but i can’t really see Scott exposing himself to thedanger that would come with werewolf hunting? Otoh, Scott as the out-of-controlmonster and Antonio as the hunter who tries to protect his village would beA+++ i like the oppositesetting too though; i’m just not quite sure how Scott would get involved in itas a hunter!

Antoniomanages to hurt Scott and moves closer to finish him off, but something aboutthe way Scott looks at him makes him hesitate? He thought he was hunting awolf, but the monster in front of him looks too human. So he muzzles Scott,ties him up and brings him home. In the morning Scott shifts back and he just won't stop crying because hedoesn't want to kill people but he just can't control himself, and it hurts somuch, and he just wants it to stop.

It's weird and scary and Antonio doesn't knowwhat to do, but he wants to help.

who’s the mermaid and who’sthe fisherman

Scott is the fisherman! Hefishes for sport though, not for food. Antonio is a very pretty but also veryshy merman (he looks like a shark, he has pointy teeth!) who gets caughttrying to cut Scott’s line and ends up cutting his arm rather badly on the fishinghook. Scott is slightly terrified tbh, but not nearly as much as poor Antonio is.D:

Scottsomehow manages to get over it and does his best to fix Antonio's arm. Theycan't even understand each other at first (Antonio only speaks whateverlanguage mermen speak), but they both learn and they become really close. Scotttells Antonio about life on land and brings him little gifts, and in returnAntonio shows him some safer fishing spots and brings him all sorts of coolstuff. He even sings for him once :D

who’s the witch and who’sthe familiar

Scott studies magic VERY seriouslyand pretty much never talks to anyone because he thinks they’re a waste of his time. Then one day he tries to summona cat familiar, messes up in very unexpected ways and ends up with a hot guy instead??He tries to treat Antonio like a normal familiar, but he just feels weird orderinghim around. So basically he ends up letting Antonio chill around the house anddo nothing all day because he just can’t figure out how to send him back.

i guessAntonio ends up more or less taking the role of an apprentice here? Scott keepsreassuring that he'll find a way to send Antonio home, but the more timepasses, the less interested they both are in that. Antonio develops an interestin Scott's work and really wants to learn, and Scott finds out he actuallyLIKES sharing what he knows.

who’s the barista and who’sthe coffee addict

Antonio has been working asa barista for a few years now, and he’s actually doing pretty good. He likestalking with the customers and is super friendly and everyone likes him might have a bit of a crush.

who’s the professor andwho’s the TA

Oh man, i love the idea of Antonio as a very reserved, very quiet professor?He is super smart and his students love him and he works on some extra complexresearch (biology seems like an interesting field for him? i dunno i just likeit) on the side, but he is CONSTANTLY overworked and is losing so much sleepthat his bosses basically force him to hire someone to help out. Scott mostlyvolunteers thinking the job will look good on his CV later,but also he 100% has the biggest crush in the world.

who’s the knight and who’sthe prince(ss)

Scott as the youngest prince from a big family is MY JAM. He gets boreda lot and doesn’t really know how to do anything except sit and look prettysince tbh no one really bothers teaching him anything else? He spends most ofhis time reading books or eavesdropping on conversations from people who aremore important than he is.

Then one day he gets so bored he decides to go outside, wearing civilianclothes so people won’t be tempted to bother him, and on the way he runs intoAntonio who almost tramples him with his horse. And Scott would be mad, really, but he is way too busy being distracted byAntonio’s eyes and by how nicely and softly he speaks to him tbh.

When Antonio doesn’t seem to recognize him, Scott makes up some bullshitstory about working at the stables just so he can maybe have a chance to seehim again. Antonio doesn’t believe it for a second (no one working at thestables would have so little muscle), but Scott is so clearly starved forattention and basically looks at him like he is the most incredible personalive, and it feels kinda nice? So he lets him hang around. :D

who’s the teacher and who’sthe single parent

Scott ended up taking care of one of his nieces, and she is NOT an easykid. She and Scott have a lot in common, and you’d think that would make thingseasier but it doesn’t? She gets pretty good grades, but doesn’t have any friendsand keeps being rude to the other kids. Scott is kind of aware of it, but he loves her so much he lets it pass. Theyget along pretty well!

So when Antonio asks to meet Scott, Scott is 100% ready to rip him apartbecause he expects Antonio to criticize and tell him about how horrible hisniece is and how Scott is doing a shitty job taking care of her? But when theymeet Antonio is extremely calm and refuses to respond whenever Scott isaggressive with him, so Scott just… calms down? Antonio might not be happy withhow things are with Scott’s niece, but he wants to help and he IMMEDIATELY seeshow much she and Scott have in common. He gives pretty good advice and themeeting goes well! They exchange phone numbers so they can talk if they everneed to, and tbh by the time he gets home Scott is already texting Antonio aboutsome completely unrelated bullshit he saw on the internet earlier that daybecause he has no chill.

who’s the writer and who’sthe editor

Scott isthe scary as hell editor who will refuse manuscripts for the pettiest bullshit.He works with John, who thankfully is a lot more reasonnable! So John is theone who originally got Antonio’s manuscript (it’s an adventure book for kids,and it’s adorable); he liked it andput a bunch of encouraging notes and suggestions in it before handing it backto Antonio so he could rework it. Which Antonio does.

Except whenhe comes back with his manuscript, John doesn’t have time to take care of it,so Scott gets it instead. And when Scott reads it, he has A LOT OF (not verynice) THINGS TO SAY. Poor Antonio gets his manuscript back with so much red inkin it you can barely read it anymore. D: And let’s face it, Scott is not greatat all with kids literature (the kids collection being just a tiny part of thepublishing house, for the most part they specialize in more serious stuff), sohis notes are kinda bullshit and not all that relevant to the type of storyAntonio is trying to tell! Antonio is heartbroken but decides to talk thingsout with Scott in person. The meeting is the most uncomfortable thing, butScott ends up softening up a little because as soft-spoken and shy as Antoniois, he REALLY knows his shit when it comes to his stories. They manage to getalong, but it’s kind of a relief when John finds the time to take care ofAntonio’s manuscript again. They keep in touch, and it doesn’t take long at allbefore Scott starts wondering how the hell he can let Antonio know about hisfeelings without making things super awkward.