#ts3 bailey swain

[papermint-airplane]

Eleanor: Oh for fuck's sake. Ladies, side bar!

Eleanor: Are we seriously not going to address the elephant in the room?! And by elephant, I mean the obvious wig and clown makeup.

Mysterious Mime: Not a clown, dear, a mime. Zey are completely different!

Eleanor: You stay out of this!

Angela: What are you saying?

Eleanor: Really?! If your eyes somehow aren't telling you something is seriously off here, then use your head. A mysterious sixth contestant just happens to show up right after Rose reappears? Come on, I can't be the only one who sees right through that stupid disguise.

Mysterious Mime: You wound me, mademoiselle! Zis is no disguise! Zis is how I always look! Eet ees called 'fashion'. Look eet up!

Eleanor: I am not talking to you!

Angela: Hmm, she does sound a lot like Rose, now that you mention it. And her accent is rather...transient.

Eleanor: We're not really going to go through with this challenge like everything is normal, right?

Viridia: ACTUALLY, I THINK THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE SHOULD DO.

Eleanor: What?!

Viridia: SHE'S CLEARLY UP TO SOMETHING. WHAT BETTER WAY TO FIND OUT WHAT THAT IS BY GOING ALONG WITH IT?

Eleanor: I mean, sure, but...

Viridia: AND DON'T YOU THINK IT'S STRANGE THE WATCHER DIDN'T IMMEDIATELY KICK HER OUT?

Eleanor: Yeah, I do think that's strange. The Watcher has to know who's under that paper-thin disguise, so I don't think it's an accident that she's here.

Viridia: SO...?

Eleanor: *sigh* Fine. For the sake of morbid curiosity, let's do it.

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[dreamsongsims]

That’s Marama Reaper after a seasonally appropriate make-over. She tutored Bailey (Bella Swan?) to get her grades up and quickly built an excellent relationship with her.

[necile]

Theda took a trip to the elixir store, and while she was waiting for the cashier to show up, she sat with this young lady under a tree and read a book.

[moonlight--falls]

BAILEY: "Boo! Your snowman sucks!" 

SAMUEL: "Don't judge my art!"

[lgthatawkwardgamer]

Zoe went to prom by herself because she’s a boss ass witch and finally won prom queen. 

Zack won prom king for the second time in a row (no surprise there), but his girlfriend, Bailey Swain came dressed in her mother freakin’ hot dog costume and ruined my sweet boy's prom photo for the second time in a row. 

[silviastudy]

[abstractwithturkey]

Artie apparently tried to kiss her??? lmao, rekt. 

[vagarysims-old]

still a better love story than- okay no, I’m not making that joke

[papermint-airplane]

Eleanor: Whoa whoa whoa, what do you mean 'who is Aiden'?! He's the Bachelor! You know, the whole reason we're competing in the first place?!

Angela: Surely you can't be serious!

Rose: I am serious! 🤭 And don't call me--

Viridia: IF YOU FINISH THAT SENTENCE, I WILL END YOU MYSELF.

Eleanor: Gaaaaaaah, I hate you people.

Angela: Then I guess I need you to explain a lot more than the murder attempt because if you aren't competing for Aiden's heart -- the alleged premise of the show -- what are you competing for?

Rose: I. keep. TELLING YOU! I want to WIN! 😠

Angela: Yes, but win what?!

Rose: Uggggh, you're so dense, it physically hurts. 😩

Viridia: STOP TALKING IN CIRCLES AND JUST EXPLAIN SOMETHING FOR ONCE!

Rose: Haven't you ever heard the expression 'winning isn't everything, it's the only thing'? 🙄

Angela: Yeah, I've heard toxic Little League coaches say that to crying seven year olds. And?

Rose: Seriously?! It's the principle I've based my entire life on! It's my mantra! My raison d'être! 👿

Viridia: WATCH OUT, SHE'S GOING FRENCH AGAIN.

Angel: So the whole reason you snuck back into the house, disguised yourself as a mime, sloppily painted your blue stripes purple, tried to kill Angela, and potentially scarred Aiden for life was...because of an expression everyone uses ironically?

Rose: It's not ironic to me, dammit! It's my sole purpose in life! Everyone knows that, even the Watcher! And she...she used it against me. 😓 She promised me that if I made the competition interesting for her, she'd let me back into the house.

Eleanor: Wait. What?! Say that again.

Rose: When I broke into her control room, she made me an offer: I'd get to come back and compete again as long as I did something to shake up the status quo. She was getting bored of you idiots. 🥱

Angel: I-I can't believe this.

Bailey: I know what you mean...

Angel: One of us got to meet the Watcher in person and it wasn't me.

Rose: Look, Angel, if it makes you feel any better, she's not what you think. She's...crazy. 😦

Bailey: High praise coming from you.

Rose: And not only that, she seriously doesn't know how 'Earth reality shows' as she calls them work because holy shit, this whole thing has been one clusterfuck from the beginning. 🙄 She says it's a Bachelor-type dating show but she's run the whole thing like a survival show with the challenges and eliminations. I mean half of us haven't even met this Arwin-or-whatever, let alone been on a date with him. What sense does that make?! 😵

Aiden: It's Aiden. I'm Aiden!

Eleanor: You're right. I thought this whole thing was shoddily arranged but I've never seen any reality dating shows. For all I knew, this is how they're supposed to be.

Rose: Well I've seen hundreds of them, and believe me, this is not how they're supposed to be. Arlo is supposed to spend time with all of us one-on-one, not be shoved into a pod by himself ninety percent of the time. 😣 I don't know how they do shows like this back on her planet but it's not how we do it on Earth. 👽

Eleanor: On...her...planet? The Watcher is an alien?

Rose: Well duh. 😑 You couldn't tell? Why do you think she abducted us all at the casting call? She had to get us on more familiar turf.

Angel: That doesn't make any sense. The Watcher can't be an alien. She's an eternal extra-dimensional being of pure benevolence.

Viridia: WILL YOU SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR RELIGION, ALREADY?! CLEARLY SOMETHING ELSE IS GOING ON.

Eleanor: I knew it, we really are in the Lunar Lakes moon settlement. I could tell from the trees. But...why are we the only Sims here?

Rose: I don't know and I don't care. 🤨

Wow. You really exposed me to everyone, huh, Rose?

Rose: You exposed yourself! You should have just let me win from the jump and I wouldn't have had to tell everyone what I knew. 😖

I guess it really is a good thing I didn't tell you the whole plan, then, huh? Otherwise you'd have run your mouth to Aiden.

Rose: Yeah yeah, Argyle or whoever-the-fuck. Well, I held up my end of the bargain. You're going to call this whole thing off and just announce me the winner, riiiiight? 🤤

Why would I do that?

Rose: Because...I made things interesting for you, like we agreed on. 😕

Then why am I still bored?

Rose: I-- 😶

You haven't won anything, Rose. You're still the same loser you were when you walked into this place on the first day. And that's all you'll ever be.

Rose: ...

Nothing to say to that?

Rose: I am going to kick. your. ass. 😡

[Beginning] [Previous] [Next]

[papermint-airplane]

Bailey: What is all this stuff?

Eleanor: Well, Aiden? Does anything look like a wormhole generator to you?

Bailey: I wonder if I could turn this computer on...

Robotic voice over the intercom: Detonation in T-minus 40 seconds.

Eleanor: Bailey! Whatever you're doing, we don't have time for it!

Aiden: This! It looks a little different from what I'm used to but I'm pretty sure it's this.

Robotic voice over the intercom: Detonation in T-minus 30 seconds.

Eleanor: 'Pretty sure' will have to do. We'll go in pairs. Buddy system, and all that. I've got Angel.

Viridia: I'VE GOT AIDEN.

Angela: That leaves me and Bailey.

Angel: Is this safe? Do we even know where we're going to end up?

Robotic voice over the intercom: Detonation in T-minus 20 seconds.

Eleanor: No, but if we stay here, we're going to end up dead.

Angel: Good point.

Angel: Here goes nothing.

Eleanor: See you all on the other side!

[machine engages]

Bailey: They're gone.

Angela: And we're up next. Let's go. Safe trip, everyone!

[machine engages]

Aiden: It's just us now.

Robotic voice over the intercom: Detonation in T-minus 15 seconds.

Viridia: WAIT!

Viridia: IT'S BEEN--*cough* it's been truly wonderful getting to meet you. i mean it. this whole thing has been wild and unpredictable and kind of insane but it was all worth it to get to know you.

Robotic voice over the intercom: Detonation in T-minus 10 seconds.

Aiden: I really wish we had more time together.

Viridia: we'll have plenty of time when we get where we're going. but just in case something goes wrong, i want you to know...

Robotic voice over the intercom: 9...8...

Viridia: i, viridia, have fallen in love with you.

Aiden: I--

[machine engages]

Robotic voice over the intercom: 7...6...

Aiden: Viridia...

Robotic voice over the intercom: 5...4...

Aiden: Well, wherever we end up, let's hope Aoife isn't waiting for us.

[machine engages]

Robotic voice over the intercom: 3...2...

[computer switches on as the wormhole generator begins to whine strangely]

Robotic voice over the intercom: 1.

[Beginning] [Previous] [Next]

[papermint-airplane]

Anyway, today's challenge is a gauntlet of feats so extreme, so brutal, so painful, I'm fully expecting at least one of you to die violently!

Contestants, minus Eleanor: *worried murmuring*

First, the contestants will enter the Tornado of Terror where they'll endure intense G-forces that'll liquefy their insides!

Eleanor: That's a dance sphere...

Then, the contestants will traverse the Flaming Footpath of Fear not once, but twice!

Eleanor: The coals are barely glowing...

Provided they survive the agonizing embers, they'll climb the Wall of Woe to reach the Platform of Precarious Peril at the top!

Eleanor: My foster mom rented one of these for her kid's 8th birthday...

Finally, atop the platform, each contestant will grab a Jetpack of Jeopardy and take to the skies for a ten minute flight from which they may never return!

Eleanor: Ten minutes is the length of the battery charge, isn't it?

The contestants will enter the gauntlet two at a time to battle each other head to head to claim the title of athletic supremacy! And a date with our Bachelor, of course.

Viridia: THIS IS GOING TO BE A BLAST! I'M GOING TO LEAVE ALL OF YOU IN MY DUST!

Eleanor: Hold up, I'm noticing a critical flaw in the design of this challenge.

Of course you are. Fine, I'll indulge you. What does the Brain Trust of Eleanor Tinley find fault with this time?

Eleanor: You said we're going up two by two.

Yeah. And?

Eleanor: There are five of us left.

What's your point?

Eleanor: You're not very good at math, are you? Five is an odd number. We can't exactly 'battle it out head to head' if one of us doesn't have a challenge partner.

Oh. Uh...well....

Mysterious Mime: Zen I suppose I shall have to compete to even ze numbers.

[Beginning] [Previous] [Next]

[papermint-airplane]

There. Isn't everyone more comfortable now?

Eleanor: No!

Viridia: I KIND OF AM...

Eleanor: Why are you still dressed like a clown when we all know who you are now?

Rose: I already told you, I'm not a clown, I'm a mime! 😤 Also the makeup wouldn't wash off. And I might have used a little too much wig glue... 😟

Aiden: Have you tried sulfuric acid? I hear that works wonders at removing mimes from existence.

Holy shit, Aiden!

Aiden: I don't like mimes!

Rose: Look, can we just get past the mime thing? I have a bone to pick with Princess Angela here and I didn't get to say my piece at the challenge course. 🤨

Angela: By all means, please continue your thoughts! I'd love to know why I'm such a big threat that you tried to literally murder me!

Rose: Simply put, I don't trust you. 🙃 I don't buy the sweet innocent image you try to put out into the world. Always being nice to everyone, always trying to make friends. We're not here to make friends.

Angela: But...I am. It's the only reason I signed up for the show, to be honest. I was lonely. I saw an ad for a casting call in the newspaper and I thought, if nothing else, I could make some friends if I was picked for the show. I never expected to be shot into outer space. Still, I'm glad for the experience. I've met so many nice people here and...and you, Rose. I really thought you and I hit it off the first few days. I really thought you were my friend.

Rose: Wow, you're an idiot then. I'm not here for you. I'm here to win.

Bailey: You keep saying that, but do you even really care about Aiden?

Rose: Who the fuck is Aiden? 🤨

[Beginning] [Previous] [Next]

[papermint-airplane]

Robotic voice over the intercom: Detonation in T-minus 60 seconds.

Eleanor: There! That has to be the control room!

Everyone: *running and panting*

Viridia: AIDEN, HURRY!

Aiden: I'm right behind you!

Robotic voice over the intercom: Detonation in T-minus 50 seconds.

Eleanor: Brace yourselves. God only knows what we're about to find in here.

[doors woosh open]

Eleanor: Well this is...

Eleanor: ...a lot.

[Beginning] [Previous] [Next]

[papermint-airplane]

Aiden: I always knew Aoife was crazy, but murder?! I just...I can't believe she'd go this far just to get to me! If I had known...I could have...I...

Viridia: it's not your fault, baby.

Aiden: *sobbing*

Viridia: it's ok, baby. let it out. i've got you.

Angela: I don't even know why I came over here. Bubbles aren't going to fix this. I just saw someone die in front of me! Why am I so stupid?

Bailey: You're not stupid, Angela. You're in shock. We all are.

Bailey: I know what it feels like to lose someone. Not in the same way, of course, but it feels like a piece of you is missing. Some potential future you'll never experience now. I know you and Rose weren't even close but...

Angela: I feel like we could have been, you know? If we could have just put this stupid competition behind us, we could have been friends. None of this had to play out the way that it did.

Bailey: I know. I'm sorry.

Angel: Everything is a lie, my faith is a lie, my life is a lie.

Eleanor: Listen to me, you need to get a hold of yourself. There will be time to break down later but right now, we need to move. Rose said something about a wormhole generator. We have to find it. We have to get out of here because I'm pretty sure something even worse is about to hap--

Robotic voice over the intercom: Self destruct mode engaged.

Eleanor: Oh fuck me sideways! I knew it!

Robotic voice over the intercom: Detonation in T-minus 90 seconds.

[Beginning] [Previous] [Next]

[papermint-airplane]

Angela: How could you?! You're a monster!

Eleanor: Wormhole generator, huh?

Aoife: I--I am a monster! What have I done?!

Aoife: Psych! That was the most fun I've had in eighteen cycles!

Aoife: Did you see her face? All the spasming and twitching? She was like "bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeh I'm dying, skull emoooojiiii".

Aoife: Anyway, I'd love to stick around but I have a villainous escape to make before the shock wears off and you all attack me.

Aoife: Oh, and Aiden? I'll be seeing you again real soon.

Aoife: Toodles!

[teleporter sound]

[Beginning] [Previous] [Next]

[papermint-airplane]

Everyone: *shocked gasps, surprised whispers, and one loudly panicking alien man*

'The Watcher': Happy now, Rose? I'm here.

Aiden: Aoife?! Aoife Ee?! Is that you?!

Aoife: Hiiiii, Aiden! Nice to see you face-to-face again. Been a long time, huh?

Aiden: Not long enough if you ask me.

Aoife: Still holding a grudge, I see. Maybe this will remind you of happier times.

Aiden: Mmmph!

Aiden: Get off of me! Are you crazy?! I mean, yes, obviously you are extremely crazy, but are you even crazier now than the last time I saw you?! When you had your goons hunting me down like a gnarleep from the Fr'ge'xl forest?!

Aoife: Hey, come on now, that's all zholxtroth slime under the bridge!

Aiden: I will be the one who decides where the zholxtroth slime is, thank you very much! And it is absolutely not under the bridge!

Aoife: You can't blame me for what I did! You'd have done the same if you were in my position!

Aiden: No, I wouldn't have! Nobody else on Sixam would have done even half of what you did!

Viridia: HEY, WHAT IS GOING ON HERE AND WHY ARE YOU TONGUING MY MAN?!

Aoife: Your man?! You're forgetting I was watching your date. He could barely stand to be near you.

Viridia: THAT IS NOT HOW I REMEMBER THINGS.

Aiden: Yeah, I had a really nice time, actually.

Viridia: IF ANYONE HERE IS GOING TO FORCEFULLY KISS AIDEN, IT'S GOING TO BE ME.

Aoife: Oh is that so? What are you going to do about it? Fight me?

Viridia: HELL YEAH, SQUARE UP, BITCH!

Aoife: Have it your way!

Viridia: YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THAT!

Rose: Hey, did we all forget whose showdown this was supposed to be?! 😫

Angela: Do you know what's going on?

Bailey: I never know what's going on.

Angel: My whole world view is a lie. Everything I know is crumbling into dust right in front of me.

Aoife: She's right, Viridia, this is between me and her. So if you'll kindly fuck right off...

Viridia: I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU MAKE ME.

Aoife: *psychic effort noises*

Viridia: WHAT THE--

Viridia: ZZZ...

Aoife: Hush now, the adults are talking.

Eleanor: Was that some sort of psionic wave? Can you do that?

Aiden: Yeah, it's not that impressive. Every Sixamite in their first stage of development learns how to do that before they can even crawl.

Aoife: Now where were we? Oh, that's right! You were being a ginormous pain in my ass!

Rose: I did what you asked me to do! Why won't you honor your word? 😣

Aoife: Because I was lying, idiot. I wasn't going to actually follow through on naming you the winner. I wasn't going to name anyone the winner. I was going to eliminate all of you, one by one, until Aiden realized that there's nobody in this galaxy or any other that loves him as much as I do and he'd have no choice but to fall into my arms and I could finally CRUSH HIS HEART INTO A FINE POWDER AND BLOW IT BACK INTO HIS FACE, THE SAME WAY HE DID TO MINE!!!!!!!!!!!

Angela: Holy shit, she really is crazy...

Aoife: But I guess all of that is ruined now, thanks to you.

Rose: What are you going to do now? 🤔

Aoife: The only thing I can do.

Aoife: I'm going back to my control room.

Rose: H-hey! 😨

Aoife: Oh. Just one more thing, though.

Aoife: Even if I had no intention of keeping my word, you still deserve an extra-special reward for your performance.

Aoife: Enjoy.

Rose: Huh?! 😱

Rose: Gkkk! AAAAGHHHH!

Rose: You! You bitch!

Aoife: It's what you deserve, Rose.

Rose: A-Angela...I'm s-sorry...control room...wormhole...generator...go...home...

[electricity crackles]

Aoife: Congratulations, Rose. You won.

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