#treasure planet really did make me go wow my parents suck i guess i have to run away and do crime be gay now

[makemesing-oh-lalala]

The reason my parents didn’t let me watch Treasure Planet as a kid is because they knew I’d realize I’m trans and i’d be too powerful, but they couldn’t stop me when I bootlegged it from youtube and began idolizing Jim Hawkins and now the process is done. There’s no going back I am enlightened

[youremyonlyhope]

Empress of Mars

I knew I wouldn’t be able to watch last night’s episode, so I was ok with not catching up by then. Still managed to get spoiled...

Hey Brits... if American Doctor Who fans follow you... can you tag your stuff as “Doctor Who spoilers” for at least the first... 12 hours after airing? Because I got spoiled like 5 minutes after the most recent episode aired in England yesterday.

Doctor what are you doing? “Authorizing us to go anywhere we please.” WHICH IDIOT GAVE THE DOCTOR THAT? Or was it psychic paper and I’m just not paying attention. Rewinded. It looks like psychic paper, but we didn’t get a good enough look. The psychic paper isn’t as funny unless we can tell it’s the psychic paper. GOD SAVE THE QUEEN. WHAT THE HELL IS RIGHT. I mean yeah god save the Queen because Elizabeth II is the great but like... on Mars... I know the English colonized a lot of places but they definitely didn’t get to Mars. WOW NOT EVEN QUEEN ELIZABETH, QUEEN VICTORIA. “You’d like that one too! Everybody dies.” OH Bill. TARDIS. WHAT ARE YOU DOING. YOU NEVER LEAVE WITHOUT THE DOCTOR!? WHY?!?!?! ARE YOU SCARED OR SOMETHING?! BUT EVEN THEN YOU WOULDN’T LEAVE WITHOUT THE DOCTOR. But we haven’t had an episode where the Doctor is stranded without the TARDIS in a while so I’m ok with this considering some of my fave episodes are TARDIS-less ones (42, Impossible Planet/Satan Pit). Oh cool, we got old school Ice Warrior Martians. I say! I wasn’t expecting A VICTORIAN ERA DUDE ON MARS.

ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT ENGLAND COLONIZED MARS TOO!? I WAS JOKING EARLIER ABOUT COLONIZING MARS. BAD ENOUGH THE EMPIRE FELT ENTITLED TO OUR ENTIRE PLANET, YOU HAD TO GO TO ANOTHER ONE?!

Doctor. Your first thought should have been “Why is there a Victorian guy with a gun on Mars” instead of “Don’t let the Victorian guy shoot the Martian.” I mean yeah, that’s something important to think of, but that’s more of the immediate second thought after “why is he here?” Robinson Crusoe! I just finished taking a musical theatre intensive, one guy in my class had to sing a song called “Blue Room” and it became a running joke in our program. And Robinson Crusoe is mentioned in the song and I’ll always only think of this song now. Ok I guess that’s the only good thing so far, that they found nothing on Mars worth conquering it for. Oh. Plus you enslaved Friday. Come on. Oh poor baby Friday no please not the last of his kind! Ok but the Doctor’s “Is he now?” concerns me because it could either be the Doctor’s usual “Another last of their kind? I must adopt them” thing or it could be “I know there should be more Martians in the future so what’s happening right now?...” I bet you anything that the Gargantua is something that makes the ship go and that’s why they can’t leave. Oh the British colonial mindset. “They want to help us exploit their lands! ” What was that mindset called where they felt like they were the parent to the people they colonized? Or whatever it was they felt? I forget. IT WAS THE WHITE MAN’S BURDEN. This is literally the mindset of the White Man’s Burden. “Mars is part of the Empire now.” OH god. Oh my god we’re only 20 minutes in. So Jackdaw. You’re not only gonna disobey orders, you’re gonna steal treasures from Mars, and then leave everyone behind on Mars while you go back to Earth. Wow. Can’t get more selfish than that.

A COMMERCIAL FOR THAT MOVIE “LIFE” ABOUT LIFE ON MARS IS SO FITTING. GOOD MARKETING. CONGRATS “LIFE.” GIVE WHOEVER SAID “HEY, LET’S MAKE SURE THIS IS AIRED WITH A DOCTOR WHO EPISODE ABOUT MARTIANS ON DEMAND” A RAISE BECAUSE THEY DESERVE IT.

Aaaand this is why colonialism is bad. Ok he got compressed into a ball or something by that beam what the hell. “You think you can just go about slaughtering my men?” You think you can just go about trying to find treasures on a new land and take it over for your Empire? “What does the pink thing say” THAT’S A STAR TREK REFERENCE RIGHT?! Those tears, Capaldi. Yes. I’m gonna miss Capaldi so much. “I ask mercy for these primitives.” “Primitives!?” Not so nice when you’re the one being called primitive, huh? “We are both surrounded by noisy males.” YES GIRL. Do these idiots really not run unless their colonel says to? These guys are just standing in fear while the Doctor’s like “GET THESE MEN OUT OF HERE.” AND THEY DON’T EVEN RUN WHEN THE IDIOT WHO SHOT THE GUN GETS TURNED INTO A BALL. NOT UNTIL THE COLONEL SAID RETREAT. I GET THAT IT’S IMPORTANT TO FOLLOW ORDERS, BUT YOU CAN’T FOLLOW ORDERS DEAD.

I just wanna say I am LOVING this episode so far. Criticizing British colonialism? Yes please.

“That will hold them!” Will it though? Too bad this is Victorian times and the Doctor is both a knight and banished. Not a good time for him. “There’s no setting for wood, why is there still no setting for wood?” Why is there wood on Mars? Did they bring wood with the only purpose to make a door? Is he laughing because she’s a black police officer or because she’s a woman police officer or both... Ok... just because she’s a woman. At least he’s not racist. “I’m gonna excuse your Victorian attitude because... Well... because you’re actually Victorian.” I mean yeah. Oh great. Martians coming out of the ground. If Vincey dies I’m gonna kill someone. HEY. I DON’T SAY THIS OFTEN. BUT FUCK YOU DUDE WHO JUST PUSHED VINCEY IN FRONT OF YOU SO HE’D DIE INSTEAD OF YOU. I THINK IT WAS THE CAPTAIN. CATCHLOVE OR WHATEVER YOUR NAME WAS. I WASN’T PAYING ATTENTION BECAUSE LITERALLY IN THE HATS AND UNIFORMS AND FACIAL HAIR YOU ALMOST ALL LOOK THE SAME. BUT WHOEVER YOU ARE YOU SUCK. Aaaannnd my Internet sucks so it’s buffering right when Bill and the Queen are gonna have a talk woman to woman. Come on. I bet half the warriors are dead. “Like... like ‘Frozen.’” OF ALL THE MOVIES OF THE LAST COUPLE DECADES, THAT’S THE ONE YOU KNOW?!?!??!! And now the Captain’s trying to leave without everyone else. Great. YES COLONEL.

OK but now I’m like “I feel like British soldiers going to Mars would be in the history books” but then I remembered that this is Queen Victoria. She probably had Torchwood deal with it and keep it all a secret. I’m pretty sure this is after she formed Torchwood, but I’ll have to double check. But I think the werewolf thing was the 1870s so.

“Aways been my problem.” “What” “Thinking like a warrior.” Awwwww Doctor no. Alpha Centauri? Why is that ringing a bell? I should have written in this post earlier “I bet this is all full circle, they have to build the God Save the Queen thing to bring them there in order to build it so it brings them there.” because I had been thinking at some point in the midpoint, because I felt like not even the colonizers would write something like that in rocks on the surface, so it probably was the Doctor. But I didn’t put it in, and I should of. About time you got back here Narodole and Missy. I mean yeah that’s a good question, Doctor, are you alright?

I LOVED that episode. Oh my god. I loved it. I love this season so far so much. Oh my god. It’s great.