#trash of the count's family taylor stan

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Manhwa: Trash of the count’s family

Characters: Alberu Crossman & Taylor Stan

Chapter: 52

[weirdmultishipper]

Cale Henituse and his allies before chapter 211:

If you know, you know. 😏

[weirdsht]

Cliché - LoTCF & Venion Stan! Reader

notes: ngl i took more time dwelling whether i should make this a series. but i never did two series at once because i can't handle the commitment, so i compromised by making it a long oneshot. ALSO TRIGGER WARNING: I put my psych major to work while writing this fic so...

tags: TRIGGER WARNING PLEASE CAREFULLY READ THE TAGS (dw nothing too graphic for every warning) depression, eating disorder, anxiety, self-loathing, torture and abuse, guilt, like lots of guilt, passive to mild suicidal thoughts, not being able to control your body, catatonic depression, anhedonia, blood, cursing, vague novel spoilers, Taylor Stan being the best brother out there, open ending i think, can be seen as hurt/comfort

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome

Requests are open and welcome

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Navigation Masterlist Platitude (pt. 2)

Tak Tak Tak

The sound of the horses of the carriage filled your ears as soon as you woke up.

…Wait horses?

How could there be horses when you were sure you were inside a lecture hall?

“Young master I’m glad you’re awake. We are nearing Viscount Tolz’s territory.”

Viscount Tolz? That sounds familiar, but you can’t quite put your finger on it as you just woke up.

You observed the unfamiliar place you woke up in. You seem to be inside a carriage, years of reading manhwas, manhuas, mangas and web novels have gotten you familiar as to what they looked like. 

Observing the interior a bit more, you notice that the carriage you are in seems luxurious. That and the servant riding a horse outside the carriage window just called you “young master”. 

‘Did I transmigrate? I swear I was just nodding off during one of my lectures…’

“You. What date is it? My head feels fuzzy from sleeping in this uncomfortable carriage.”

‘I’ve rotten my brain reading that damn isekai genre. I already know the drill, I should be a villain or something. I guess I should be glad I didn’t end up as an animal, those things have gotten popular these days…’

You silently shivered at the thought of being a bird or a snake.

“I’m sorry about the seat young master. You’re custom cushion should be arriving tomorrow. As for the date, it is currently year 780 of the Felix Calendar.”

Shit

By the calendar mentioned you could already tell what series you transmigrated to. There was only one series you know that uses Felix Calendar.

Lout of the Count’s Family

And it looks like you got sucked into that novel a year before things began.

“As soon as that arrives install it in my carriage. This thing is as hard as a brick.”

Contrary to what you say, the seat is very soft and comfortable. However, if you really did transmigrate as a villain like in all those manhwas you’ve read then you figured you have to act as bratty as possible. 

“I understand young master. We are nearing the villa soon, I’m sure young master Neo has prepared your room so you can rest.”

Fuck. You’re fucked.

Out of all the small villains in existence you just had to steal the body of a dragon abuser. You just had to get in the body of Venion Stan.

Venion out of all people. Even Neo Tolz or Adin or Duke Fredo would’ve been better picks.

But no, the gods of this world just had to put you in the body of an atrocious villain that has no use.

Never mind running away in the countryside while enjoying all the inheritance, there’s no way that black dragon is going to leave you alone.

…And for sure the black dragon is already 3 years old, there’s no saving you now. Anger and despair are already planted in that poor baby’s heart.

Everything moved too quickly to your liking. One moment you were in the carriage, then next Neo was greeting you. After you blinked you’re already in the black dragon’s cell.

‘Can I survive a year before Cale comes here to get the dragon?’

The black dragon can’t use mana, let alone dragon fear. But his vicious gaze full of animosity is already enough to make you feel guilt and fear.

He looked so pitiful. The cell might be spacious, but a cage will still be a cage. He was just there, in the middle of the cell. Chained and unable to fight back.

The buffet in the middle doesn’t help the queasiness you feel in your stomach.

“Do-”

‘Don’t bother with it, I won't be visiting the dragon further.’

The words you want to say are stuck in your throat. Some unknown force is stopping you from uttering them out.

You figured it was so that things would still go according to the plot.

‘I know I wasn’t the greatest in my previous life, but was I so bad that I must experience this?’

Tap Tap Tap

Heels of your shoes tapped against the ground as you walked towards the table. You tried to stop your body, but it was useless. No matter how hard you try to stop yourself you just keep moving.

“Start.”

Your voice- no Venion’s voice said and the torturer started whipping the dragon.

Gulp

There’s a bile in your throat threatening to show itself. However, you swallowed it. The scene may look horrendous, but you didn’t look away. You didn’t stop eating the feast in front of you. You didn’t stop laughing at the small dragon’s demise.

More like you couldn’t.

You wanted to cry. You wanted to go back to your world and curl up in your bed. You wanted all of this to be a dream.

‘Is this the doing of the gods? If so then why must they be cruel.’

“Is there anything else you want to do young master?”

“No just go out. All of you. I will follow in a short while”

Following your order, everyone in the dungeon started heading out. After a few seconds, there was no one but you and the dragon in the room.

Bleurgh!

As soon as there was no one else in the room you vomited. Good thing there was a bathroom attached in the dungeon. The bathroom door was wide open as you puked your gut out, showing the black dragon a view of your pale face. Despite that you didn’t care, your only focus was to get rid of the horrible feeling running through your body.

It’s not as if the dragon would care about its torturer.

That night you spent the entire time in your bed tossing and turning. Too tired to sleep but too scared to face the nightmares you have to combat every time you do.

“Go find a magician or something and commission a temperature-regulating device. I want it installed at the cave before we visit the Tolz territory again.”

“As you wish your highness. However, aren’t you spending a bit too much on a mere pet?”

“You dare think I’m buying all these things for that pesky dragon? I’m buying it for my own comfort, you should be aware of how I want to be comfortable all the time.”

“It seems I made a mistake. I shall prepare everything you desire for the next time you visit the villa.”

Six months has already passed since you became Venion Stan. Adjusting wasn’t easy, especially when there are more times when you can’t control your body than when you can.

But still, you persevered.

It wasn’t like you had a choice anyway. You have already taken over this body so you have to live in it. That and there’s also the fact that you want the original plot to go smoothly.

You want the black dragon to experience justice.

So you persist. Even when the atrocities you did make you puke. Even when you want to kill yourself.

You didn’t

It wasn’t right.

You may not be the original Venion Stan, but it wouldn’t be right to take away the revenge the black dragon deserves. That was why you decided to persevere.

Persevere now and suffer at the dragon's hands later before finally dying.

That was your plan.

You didn’t care about other things anymore. Money, territory, power; none of those things mattered to you anymore. Too disgusted with yourself and everything you have been doing to even attempt to enjoy those things.

However

There’s a silver lining in all of this.

After a month of being in your new body, you have found a loophole. You found a way to combat some of the restrictions to your actions. As long as you sound selfish and villainous enough, you can get away with saying and doing most things.

Using this knowledge to your advantage, you slowly made life for the dragon easier. You bought a lot of things such as cushions, a more comfortable collar, and the temperature-regulating device you just ordered. You also used this fact to lessen your hold on both Taylor Stan and the underworld.

“Venion, I heard you withdrew the people watching over your older brother.”

You scowled at Marquis Stan’s words as if the mere mention of Taylor Stan upsets you.

“Father, what can that cripple do? He has no legs, no power, and barely has any money. Putting people to watch over someone like that will only be a waste of resources.”

Luckily, the marquis agreed with your reasoning and let the situation go while praising how smart you are.

‘Hopefully by this Taylor Stan can gather more information now that my people are now hovering over him.’

That night you managed to sleep for approximately 30 minutes. The longest sleep you’ve experienced since coming over to this world.

Bleurgh!!

It was another torture session and once again you were vomiting everything you ate that week after the session. 

While you were busy trying to not make a mess on the bathroom floor, you didn’t notice a certain young dragon observing you.

He may be three years old and he may not know much but his still smart because he's a dragon. That was why he noticed the changes in his captor that started around 8 months ago. 

The young dragon noticed the hesitation in your eyes whenever you entered the dungeon. How you were puking from self-hatred and not because of how bad the food was like you said. How your laugh is soulless, especially when he’s being tortured. 

How you stagger the slightest bit while standing up after those sessions. How your hands shook ever so slightly from guilt. How you tried to make the cell as comfortable as possible for him despite saying you were doing it for your own comfort. 

How your eyes look more lifeless each time he sees you.

The young dragon noticed all of it. He may not know what caused the change, but he knows that everything you’re doing is against your volition.

“Fuck I lost my appetite already. I’m going back to my room. Feed those scraps to that dragon.”

You ordered your servants on your way out. Walking as if your entire body wasn’t shaking ten seconds ago.

The black dragon just watches you with observant eyes. 

The “scraps” you were talking about were the feast that was barely even touched. It had always been like this for a few months now. You would barely touch your food and give it to the dragon in the guise of treating him like a dog.

For now, the young one accepts the food. He’ll figure out your intentions later.

“Lessen the guards at the dungeon. Remove all the cushions too, I’m going to change them. Do the same thing to the dragon’s collar too. While you’re at it increase the guards stationed at my quarters. Put the guards in the cave to my room.”

It’s the fated day. Time passed and now is already the day the black dragon will be rescued by Cale, Choi Han, and the cat tribe children. You already met them earlier and acted as arrogant as you could.

Hence the preparation. You need to make it look like the dragon was kept in a horrible condition. Of course, he was… but like much more worse conditions.

“Assassins have been increasing their attempts lately. If I see someone assigned to my room not doing your jobs I’m going to feed you to the sharks. Oh, and you.”

You pointed at a random servant passing by.

“Here’s some gold, buy some alcohol from the inn. Don’t tell anyone I was the one who bought it.”

“May I ask what you’re going to do with the alcohol young master?”

Everyone knows that Venion Stan deemed things not noble enough as disgusting. But you felt guilty for pushing that old man around earlier so you made an excuse.

“Depends on my mood. I’m feeling generous so if you all guard my room tonight then I’ll give you the alcohol tomorrow to drink.”

Everyone held in their shock.

“But if you don’t then I’m going to throw each bottle in your heads while drinking real wine.”

With that, you turned around to lie down on your bed.

That night was the same as every other night you spent in this world. Sleepless. However, that night you felt some weight being lifted off your shoulders as you heard the ruckus Choi Han was causing outside.

‘He should be curled up in Cale’s lap while looking at me viciously’

You stealthily peeked at Cale as you walked towards your seat. Just a moment ago he was trying to rile you up by acting obnoxious. It was hard to try and act like you were keeping your composure when you agreed with everything he said.

“What the..!” 

‘Shit did I not put enough strength into my acting?’

You barely felt your blonde hair sway as you slapped the table in supposed shock at Taylor Stan’s entrance.

‘Maybe I should’ve forced myself to eat a little bit more before coming here…’

Gritting your teeth, you ignore the black spots dancing in your vision. Today is a vital day, you can’t ruin the script by fainting because you only ate 3 spoonfuls during breakfast.

Luckily, it looks like everything is going according to the plot. Based on everyone’s reaction, you looked like an enraged noble.

Days following that event were even more chaotic. Not only was the terrorist attack in the plaza terrifying but trying to act as if you were trying to hold on to your position when you just wanted to give it to Taylor was even tougher.

As usual, you persevered.

Comforted yourself at the thought that in a few months, you can embrace death’s sweet presence.

“Do I look different without the blood?”

You felt scared and relieved at the sight of the black dragon that now goes by Raon Miru.

Scared because even though you have resigned yourself to your fate, and felt like you deserve it even, you still feel fear for what’s about to come.

Relief because he looks healthy. Chubby even. You were glad that he was living a good life after he got away from you.

Disregarding your feelings, you let the poisonous fog into your body. Resigning yourself to the four days of hell waiting.

Ugh…

Your body feels sluggish when you wake up.

“What the… It hasn’t even begun yet why does that bastard’s eyes already look dead?”

“That’s what I was telling you human! That punk's eyes tell a different story from his actions.”

Soft. Whatever you were lying down on felt soft. It wasn’t like what you’ve read in the novel where Venion was lying down on the hard ground. The magic collar was also soft. It felt similar to the one you bought for Raon a year ago. 

You would know because you made sure to pick the softest one yourself.

“His eyes look more dead than when I last saw him at that cave.”

Eyes? Were they talking about yours?

You didn’t know. You didn’t care.

You just want everything to end.

Gasp!

Someone gasped, you think it was one of the kittens.

“T-tears! Why is he crying? I only put paralysis in poison earlier.”

Crying? You were crying?

You sit up. It was hard because of the chains tying your arms but you still did it.

As you look down on your lap, tears are indeed flowing.

‘Why am I crying? Wasn’t I waiting for this day?’

Everything was already planned in your head. You get tortured then you will go crazy. Then you will kill yourself and make everyone believe you did it because you’re crazy.

So why are you crying now?

Why are you in tears as if you don’t deserve what’s happening to you?

Why do you weep as though you haven’t committed several crimes this past year?

How dare you do so.

How dare you act so pitifully when the child you tortured is right in front of you?

Shameless. Till the end, you’re so shameless.

Click! 

Thunk!

Beacrox unlocked the magic collar. As he did you saw it falling on the ground.

“Ah, so there really was fur inside…”

Your voice sounded soulless. It sounded so dead that even you were shocked at how you sounded.

But it also felt cathartic.

After two years of trying to act lively. Two years of acting as if you were fighting for something.

You can finally let out your real emotions.

Two years. It took more than two years for you to be granted that privilege. 

“Speak. I heard you bought the same thing for Raon.”

“You really named him Raon…”

Beacrox grabbed your collar. He looked furious. If you remember things correctly, he just heard about the dragon’s story a while ago so you understand his feelings.

“He told you to answer. Why did you buy something like that after 3 years?”

“I was getting tired of looking at the hard metal… There was nothing in that cave but stone and metal…”

Your tears are still flowing. It looks like they were crying a whole year’s worth. 

Despite that, you were not shaking, nor were your eyes looked sad.

Contrarily, you looked like those creepy dolls with soulless eyes that cried in horror films.

That low-key scared everyone in the room.

“Before, when I was three, I saw you shaking every time you came to the cave. Why was that?”

What’s happening? Why is there a sudden interrogation? You signed up for torture not for a cross-examination.

Still, you answered the dragon.

“I can’t tell.”

“Is it related to how you can’t seem to say what you want at times?”

Just how much did that kid notice in the few times you visited him?

“Yes. When are you going to get started? I need to meet with my hyung after this…”

Meet him and then die.

So please hurry up already.

“Hey punk, you sound like you already know what’s going to happen.”

“It’s obvious. This place looks exactly like that damn cave.”

You were getting tired of talking.

Actually, you were tired. Period.

“But it doesn’t look like how I left the cave when you rescued him.”

“Yes, because that wasn’t how the cave I lived in looked like. It looked like this.”

And the “this” Raon was talking about felt more homey. There were soft lights and a bunch of pillows and cushions. There were even some stuffed toys and blankets.

Was this how you decorated Raon’s cave?

You can’t remember.

Not that you care.

“Can we get started already please?”

“I thought you were a sadist, not a masochist.”

Something snapped inside you at that moment. You didn’t know why it was Choi Han’s comment that riled you up. Maybe it wasn’t the comment but the waiting that set you off.

“Just do it already! Are you dumb?! This fucking plot will not move unless you fucking torture me!”

In that moment you felt a searing pain in your chest.

“Argh!”

Blood flowed out from your mouth.

‘So that’s what happens when I try to push the restrictions.’

Coughing out blood when you’re body was already weak from not eating and sleeping enough was bound to cause you to faint.

And faint you did.

“Young master Cale said you were unconscious for 4 days. The doctor told me you were both malnourished and fatigued. One of your servants confessed that it’s an achievement if you eat 4 spoonfuls every meal. The young master also mentioned how it seems like you were forced to do everything you’ve done… Just what is happening? Hmm? Tell this hyung of yours.”

“Hyung…”

In the end, you didn’t get tortured…

“What’s going to happen now? What’s going to happen to me?”

You diverged from the fate carved out for Venion Stan.

That made you scared.

The restriction placed upon you to prevent you from straying from the plot scared you.

“Everything will be okay. But you need to tell me what’s going on.”

Taylor Stan hugged you, and you felt disgusted with yourself that you dare find warmth and comfort in that hug. Disgusted that you dared cry in front of him when you tried to kill him in the past.

But you couldn’t help it.

You couldn’t help that your hyung was soft and caring even though he was stern and strict. 

“I’m scared hyung. I’m a horrible person.”

As you speak you notice Cale in the corner of the room. He was trying to go out to give you two some privacy.

“Please stay.”

‘You deserve to hear the truth too.’

Cale stopped moving at your words. 

At that moment you decided to spill everything. Venion Stan’s role was already done. Even if it wasn’t, you already strayed from the path written for him. So you’re pulling all stops now.

“I’m a horrible person that did horrid crimes. I know that, I did them with my own hands after all. But I didn’t want to do them.”

You felt that stinging pain slowly coming back.

“There are times when I can’t control the things I say or do. No matter how hard I try my body won’t listen to me.”

The taste of blood in your mouth is back. You tried to act as calm as possible and nonchalantly spit it out in a napkin as if you were just wiping your mouth.

“I think it’s the god’s doing. It’s fated that I must be a bad guy for everything in the future to work out.”

You wiped your mouth again.

“I couldn’t resist it. But I found a loophole.”

Wipe

“If I make it look like what I was doing is villainous then my movements will not be restricted as much.”

“So when you removed the people watching over my residence..?”

You nodded while wiping your mouth once again.

However, this time Taylor snatched the napkin out of your hands.

“You’re bleeding..!”

“Ah…”

You were wiping so much blood that it already seeped out. Causing for Taylor and Cale to see the blood.

“I should’ve used a darker colour…”

“Stop talking. I’ve already heard everything I need to know.”

“I have nothing else to say to you anyway.”

The two men started walking out of the door when you called out to someone.

“Young master Cale, can you please stay? I must tell you something.”

The marquis and the young master exchanged a glance before one of them left the room.

“What is it?”

At Taylor’s exit, Raon undid his invisibility.

“It’s not fate.”

Cale and Raon looked at you as if you’d lost your head. Honestly, you wish you did. Being beheaded right now is better than living with these horrible feelings.

“It’s plot. You should know what I’m talking about.”

Luckily, Marquiss Stan left the napkin so you could wipe your mouth again.

“I think the universe, not the gods, made a mistake with me. But despite their mistake, they are insistent on going with the plot laid out.”

You discarded the napkin. It’s already drenched with too much of your blood that it can’t be used anymore.

“But don’t worry. This plot is very beneficial to you. You just have to follow whatever you think is right. You can disregard whatever anyone says. Even if that anyone is a god.”

‘Unlike me’

Cale handed you a handkerchief and you wiped your mouth with it.

“Lastly, I’m sorry Raon Miru-nim. My only choice was to either keep torturing you or throw you out. I couldn’t throw you out, because if I did then you wouldn’t meet the young master.”

“It’s okay… I am great and mighty so I figured out long ago that you were being forced.”

“Thank you.”

With that the dragon became invisible again and the two head out of the room.

Cleanup was easy. Of course, it was. Everything was already planned out beforehand.

The previous marquis was arrested and his people were successfully rooted out. You got sentenced to house arrest.

Meaning, you got a slap on the wrist.

It confused you. Why did you get such a light sentence when you did so many horrible things? It didn’t even feel like house arrest because your hyung always kept you by his side and personally took care of you.

“How about you? How are you and your brother doing?”

You heard Cale speaking on the other side of the communication device. But you just kept your head low and stared at your palms, unmoving.

“That…”

Marquis Stan hesitated.

“His been listless since that day. I checked with an expert and they said his in a catatonic state.”

You blur out the rest of their conversation. It wasn’t like there was a need to listen anyway. There’s nothing for you to do now. Your role is done but you can’t die.

You're tired.

So so fucking tired.

Tired of waking up. Tired of moving. Tired of thinking. Tired of breathing.

Tired of living.

So you opted to not move. Tune out the world around you. Maybe if you’re lucky they’ll leave you to rot in that lavish room of yours.

“Your eyes look more lively today. Do you have enough energy to speak?”

You blinked once. Then twice. You don’t know how many days have passed already. All of them look like a giant blur in your mind.

For the first time in a while, you moved your body to look at your surroundings.

As you take in your surroundings you notice that there’s a storm outside. That and Taylor Stan seem to have put you in the wheelchair he used to use.

“Taylor Stan…”

“Call me hyung.”

Did you deserve to? Well, it doesn’t matter since he ordered you to.

“Hyung”

“Yes, my dongsaeng?”

“Why won’t you kill me?”

The wheelchair stopped in its tracks. It was because the one pushing it stopped walking.

“Why would I kill you?”

“Why would you not kill me?”

You had no way of knowing just how scared Taylor was at this moment. Your voice sounded so soulless. As if you were asking about the weather and not about your death. He was already scared that one day he would just wake up to find you dead. Your questions and your way of asking them are not helping his fear.

“I told you, I wouldn’t kill my family.”

“Ah…”

Silence lingered as the two of you went to your room. Inside, the first thing you noticed was the door on the wall.

“That’s a connecting door. It’s connected to my room.”

“Very fitting for a criminal like me that needs to be monitored at all times.”

“That’s not…”

Taylor Stan chose to sigh instead of answering. After he did, he called the servants to help you with your nighttime routine.

“You all can go now, I’ll take it from here.”

Servants filed out of your room as your brother took the brush from a servant's hand.

“You know that this is useless right?”

“Why is that?”

Taylor continued brushing your blonde hair that now reaches past your shoulders.

“It’s not like I’ll sleep. There’s never a night where I slept for more than 30 minutes. I think.”

“Maybe if I stay by your side you’ll sleep better.”

You didn’t respond. You just watched in the mirror how your hyung gently brushed your hair. At some point, you pulled your legs up to your chest and started hugging them.

Taylor Stan didn’t seem to mind your movements. In fact, he seems to encourage them.

“Let’s eat dinner now. Do you want to walk?”

“No.”

The mere thought of moving more than you already did makes you feel nauseated.

Your hyung nodded and started pushing the wheelchair again. As he did the sight of the food prepared on your table caught your eyes. It wasn’t a feast like how you were served in the past.

Instead, there were just two simple identical meals on the table.

It reminded you of how you used to eat your meals back on earth.

“You’re eating too?”

“I haven’t eaten yet. I figure we can eat together since Cage is not here.”

She must be in the super rock’s villa or something.

Eat together was what you did. Well, more like Taylor ate while you take a few bites and play with your food.

“Do you not want to eat anymore?”

“No.”

“It’s fine, just leave it there. You already ate thrice more than you usually would. It’s okay to take it slow.”

That’s true. You ate 10 spoonfuls today when you would usually just take a bite or two. Three at most.

Maybe a gentle company and a simple meal did the trick. But you aren’t sure.

After the meal, you brushed your teeth before lying down on the bed. Taylor was sitting on a couch beside your bed as promised.

That night, for the first time since you arrived in this world, you managed to sleep almost the whole night.

[slackerlifewhere]

The subtlety of Cale Henituse

SPOILERS for those who haven't finished the first part of the novel. If you don't like spoilers, please don't continue. Thanks!

- This is kind of a review about the novel but it's basically my analysis of Cale/KRS.

___

For someone who has trust issues with people, I first had an initial distrust with Cale Henituse/Kim Rok Soo as a reader.

I think it's because of how he was first introduced.

As a first-time reader of the novel back then, Cale/KRS was introduced as a very indifferent person. He was calm at the face of a sudden transmigration and acted like nothing could surprise him (aside from Ron and Choi Han). And of course, like anyone who was fooled, I also thought that he was selfish. He's not the trash that he thinks he is but he's selfish and I didn't place my full trust in him because I still didn't know him yet. And I like it that way. The author kept me on my toes and didn't force fed me a truckload of information about Kim Rok Soo.

Like I said in my previous post, he didn't actually give us his whole introduction. He left a few crumbs here and there that told us he didn't have a great childhood but it wasn't enough for me to build an image of him in my head. There were still some blanks and question marks about Kim Rok Soo.

Sure, there were moments when he gave a bigger tip to someone without blinking an eye and acting all smug about it but I really just thought that he was happy because he's finally rich. Or when he was being so polite and gentlemanly in front of an old man that Venion was disgusted with and then later on went back to being indifferent and I thought it was just him being extra petty and angry (which he was) at Venion for being an asshole. He's very quick to change from smug to indifference and it made me switch back and forth on how I see him as a person.

Yeah, you need to read between the lines when reading this novel.

[side note: Actually, If I remember correctly, I thought that I wouldn't like his character because I find it weird when MCs in KR manhwa and novels easily shrug off the isekai bullshit they're in. The influence of KR manhwa on me affected my opinion about him and it shows.]

So when he first met the kittens and Choi Han, I was reading it with the feeling of "Run away, guys! Run while you still can!" lingering at the back of my mind. He was nice to them, as much as he could with random strangers he just met, but he's very distant with them.

Another thing about him that makes it harder to understand him is because he's always distant with people. He relies on them and helps them but he's always at arms-length when dealing with them. This, if you didn't think of or was reminded of his thoughts about his abuse and pity, simply makes him look indifferent.

Before I continue, I don't like tsundere characters. I absolutely find them cringe and sometimes, I just wanna bash my head when they blush at the bs they're spouting at someone they like.

Because that's the thing with Cale. He is a tsundere. He says one thing and does the opposite. And he's so in denial about it which makes it more hilarious and sad.

He's subtle about it at first. He didn't even give me the vibe that he's more complex than what he shows because he's so quick to disprove my sudden epiphany that there's something deeper than what he's showing. He's so good at hiding his emotions EVEN WHEN I'M READING HIS POV.

This bastard is so in denial about himself that he fooled me so bad! I think I only realized it when he saved Raon but even then, there were still some doubts about his character. I liked his words to Raon and thought about how kind he is for giving the dragon the freedom of choice but because he later thinks of making Raon do things for him, it shook my trust in him just a little bit. Just a little, I promise.

...Maybe I just have major trust issues.

Taylor Stan

The weirdest thing to me that actually snapped me from my doubts that he's actually a kind person is oddly enough, because of Taylor Stan.

Remember when Taylor and Cage suddenly arrived at the area they were camping in and he finally talked to Taylor face to face? Yeah, he was indifferent there but it's when his tsundere traits actually exploded at my face.

He, while trying to hide from everyone, told them to give Taylor and Cage the best care and protection as if it's the most normal thing in the world.

Mind you, they don't even actually know him aside from OG Cale's reputation as trash. And he also technically isn't supposed to know them because, in the duo's POV, this is their first time meeting him so he didn't have to help or care for them.

He basically acted as if what he was doing was bad in their eyes but in reality, it's not???

He's just helping them and he's in denial about it? He's genuinely being a kind person and he thinks he's trash?

He later gives them money (and acts cool about it) and helps with smuggling (lmao) them to the Roan Kingdom so they can arrive there safely and he thinks he's trash???

He gave this man hope to finally heal himself and fight against his brother and he thinks he's trash?????

Seriously?

Self-hatred

It's why whenever he calls himself trash, I shake my head because it's amusing but I also want to cry because, as I go further into the novel, he fully believes that he's actually trash.

I don't know if this is ever talked about but Cale is hiding a huge self-hatred about himself.

Cale pointed to himself with his index finger.

“I have lived my life as trash. That is my dream.”

- Chapter 33: You

At first, when he called himself trash, I thought it was because his soul is in OG Cale's body and thus, he inherited the title and uses it to cause chaos. It's a part of the reason why but, if I think about it, he doesn't have to call himself that??? He can still cause chaos without using that title.

It's why I think he fully believes it. That he's trash.

I didn't understand back then and thought it was just him loving the title and the chaos that comes along with it.

Him and his smirks or "selfish" ideals made it seem like he's fully embraced the title and liked it that way.

And the way the author hides a deeper meaning behind his words and actions is by making it feel humorous or comical. The author makes it feel extra.

We laugh and find it amusing because it's chaotic. The secrets behind those wild ideas and explosive destruction are brilliant and subtle.

It's why I fully believed back then, that it's a simple story about a man who just wants to cause mischief in a strange world.

And then...his past as Kim Rok Soo is finally revealed by the author.

And it suddenly turns all this humor about himself into a freaking tragedy.

Kim Rok Soo is a tragic character. He's a person who has lost far too much and can only react in indifference even when he's hurting. He's cold in another person's perspective because he doesn't cry when in front of those he lost.

He hates himself for something he couldn't control. He hates himself for being weak. He hates himself for a lot of things. And he hates the scars Kim Rok Soo has because they're the reminder of all his failures and all his sacrifices that only ended up with making him alone. Like he will always be alone. (Which makes his distant personality in the beginning make sense too wtf)

So he takes in their words of him being cruel enough not to cry in a funeral of his friends and fully believes it.

He believes, as Kim Rok Soo and Cale Henituse, that he's trash.

And it absolutely made me cry like a kid when he, as he woke up surrounded by those he befriended and could call family, finally cries with a smile.

This is the first time they and us readers see him cry and smile and it's just heartbreaking.

The whole lead up to this reveal was me seeing him as a tsundere and a freaking crazy bastard that utters "slacker life" like it's comic relief.

It's completely unexpected and I love it.

Because him crying and smiling for the first time is him finally shedding his shields and walls from these people who see him as a kind person.

Cale Henituse, for all his masks and secrets, is just a broken but endlessly kind person.

It's why those who meet him, trust him. His actions are a big reason why they trust him but his words, when it feels hopeless, are eye-opening and full of wisdom of a 36 year old man. He's straightforward in front of those he trusts and tells them something that flips over everything they think about the current situation. And he says it with the experience of Kim Rok Soo.

I believe the only times he lies to them is when he was given the thing that he was gonna use to stab himself and also when he hides his identity as Kim Rok Soo. There's actually a hint of his guilt sometimes...or maybe I'm just thinking too much about it.

Anyways, that's all my thoughts for now.

This subtle bastard made me cry, damn it.

___

That one scene of him crying and smiling is etched in my mind and was reminded of it when I recently saw a fanart. So I decided to write about my feelings about his character and personality.

It's not a mindblowing post or anything new and it goes from humor to angst pretty fast but I think it's just like him. If you analyze his words in one way, it's just hilarious but if you analyze it in another way, it's sad.

I like how the author wrote him. He's a crazy bastard and a tsundere (the only tsundere I'll ever like) and I'm so glad I found this novel.

[we-stan-cale]

We should have more Taylor Stan and Cage fics.

Like... There's clearly an entire story behind how they became friends. Plus the whole thing with losing the use of his legs.

And they're just fun together.

[gennyan]

how the fuck did cale turn both of them down, they are SO pretty

[alien-slushie]

Cale: You're ugly when you lie Venion.

Venion: I'm not lying!

Cale: Then why are you ugly?

[caleism-1]

Cale Henituse has been summoned back into the temple of the Sealed God along with a number of his closest friends and allies, where they discover that the seemingly omniscient system once tasked with the administration of the tests has been reprogrammed and given a different purpose. Its new task: to grant those summoned the opportunity to have any one question of their choosing answered. Unfortunately, those responsible for creating this situation had neglected to take into account the damage that the temple had sustained during the recent conflict. Thanks to this oversight, the once capable AI has been reduced to only having access to the knowledge and memories of those currently present in the temple. Fortunately for the group, they soon realize that there are many questions that only Cale Henituse knows the answers to.

[murasaki-cha]

Dude I miss so many characters who haven't appeared yet

I miss Bud and Glenn

I miss Hanna and Jack

I miss Cage and Taylor

I miss THE FREAKING WIND ELEMENTALS!! WHERE ARE THE WIND ELEMENTALS!!? CHAOS AND DESTRUCTION!!!

[certifiedcoffeeaddict]

back on my bs

[samberrybay]

I'm currently rereading the novel for the first time and it is very entertaining to connect some details or overshadowing author did back then, however there is a moment i cannot leave alone:

"Such an existence cannot survive in the present day. That is why i like thus myth so much."

"But you don't seem to believe it?"

Taylor nodded his head at Cage's question.

"It is very rare to see someone injure himself so severely to protect something."

"I agree."

Cale nodded his head to agree with Taylor's statement. It was one thing to protect yourself, but this guardian protected others and this Northeastern land? Cale could not understand such logic.

LIKE

SIR

YOU NEED TO SHUSH, OKAY?

OR I'M GOING TO SHAKE YOUR SACRIFICIAL ASS LIKE A MARACA!!!

[mytragedyperson]

Thoughts I had while reading TCF/LCF chapter 16

Quick note before I begin – the reason I call it TCF and not LCF is because that’s technically what I’m reading. I’m currently reading it on EAP. If there’s an official English version I can read feel free to point me in the direction of it but, since TCF is what it’s called on the site I’m reading it on, that’s probably what I’ll refer to it as. If this is a problem, please feel free to unfollow or block my posts but I don’t really refer to the book’s name at all in the actual posts though I do use names like Beacrox and stuff. I’m hoping this isn’t a huge problem for anyone, but I just thought I’d put that out there. This applies to all posts I make about TCF so I won’t repeat myself. As far as I know, there is no official translation, and it feels slightly wrong to use LCF because that’s not what the version I’m reading is called. This probably won’t change unless there’s an official English version. Just wanted to put this out there for those who care about this. Without further ado, I present to you, my thoughts

That right there, Cale’s “who will go if I don’t” perfectly sums up this character and why he does the things he does. Why does he mess with the white star so much? Who will if he doesn’t? why does he loot so many places? Who will if he doesn’t? why does he save so many people? Who will if he doesn’t? that might actually be one of the most consistent parts of his character. He does these things because, if he doesn’t, who will? No one else is gonna save the Black Dragon, or Paseton. They might try, if they knew but they don’t. so who will if he doesn’t? no one. And that’s not acceptable to him. This isn’t to say he’s the only one who would or could help people, just that, in most situations, he’s the only one who can.

And Venion is officially present. Wish he wasn’t but he is.

The fact that this utter waste of oxygen is considered a typical, authoritative noble is really sad. No wonder their world is doomed if this is a typical noble.

I feel like most villains are at least slightly smarter than Venion, honestly. Maybe not necessarily in this novel, idk about that, but villains in general. Most of them would know not to try and tame a dragon. I feel like that’s pretty basic common sense. You know what, yes, even the villains in this novel are probably slightly smarter at least. Even the bandits I was making fun of last chapter were smarter, though not by much. They had no way of knowing this carriage belonged to a noble travelling with a Choi Han and an assassin and a torture expert. Usually having the numbers game is an advantage. But my point is they didn’t know these things. Marquis Stan and Venion know this is a dragon, that’s the whole point. That makes them a lot dumber than the poor bandits who just chose the wrong carriage on the wrong day, imo.

One thing I do admire about Cale is his patience and ability to keep a calm ead even in front of something like Venion. I can’t call whatever he is a human, but calling him garbage or even human garbage is an insult to garbage and, considering OG Cale is supposed to be considered trash, that just feels more wrong. So Venion is a lot worse than living garbage, but calling him a monster feels like giving him more credit than he deserves and also is offensive to monsters so idk what he is. Also can we just think for a second about the fact that, in this novel, in this world, someone who drinks a lot and trashes places, has a worse reputation than the people torturing a baby dragon and watching it for amusement. Now, I know they’re not exactly adverting that fact but most people know he crippled (am I allowed to say that? Is there a better term? Idk, sorry) his older brother, and yet somehow more people hate or look down on OG Cale than Venion. Again showing that the typical nobles have some serious issue and skewed perspectives and priorities. You can do a horrible thing and everyone know you were responsible but, as long as you have status, power and appear like a normal noble, well, that’s just how it is. All this to say fuck Venion Stan, Marquis Stan and anyone who allies with him. Taylor is the only good person in that family and idc what anyone says about that.

Also I know the man was tortured but I don’t remember Choi Han punching him, and if Choi Han didn’t punch him, I think he should have, as a treat. He deserves it. Both of them do.

And nobles are supposed to have class and care for their people. I guess we’ve both been disappointed today. If someone has clearly fallen and you can see that, you stop. Get your head out of Venion’s ass. You can kiss it all you want, he’s still not going to respect you. sorry, I know he’s like a servant or something but that doesn’t make what he’s saying less asshole-ish. This is why we don’t associate with Venion. We become assholes if we do.

Also I know this isn’t the time but can we just take a second, before Venion or his lackey piss me off again, to admire this relationship, dare I say friendship, between Hans and Choi Han. The way he cares for him and doesn’t want him to get in trouble. I feel like Hans is definitely cheering him on on the inside and agrees with him but can’t say anything due to being a servant for the Henituse family. Hans and Choi Han friendship. I wish we saw more of this. I hope we do as the novel goes on, even if it's just a little. I want them to be besties. Idek why.

You know, I feel like it would be so easy for people to look at Hans and just see him as dumb or something but he’s not. It’s not his fault no one tells him anything. He actually has a decent amount of knowledge on things, like the noble families and what he says about the rock towers and stuff. He’s not dumb, he’s just working with the information he has.

So they were trying to get Choi Han in trouble, right? And it probably would’ve worked, except Cale saw everything and is a generally good person so agrees with Choi Han’s actions… except doesn’t this look worse for Venion? Like, another noble, and someone travelling with that noble, who is known for being trash, shows more care and compassion for this guy than Venion. It definitely reflects badly on the Tolz family, or at least it should, that a noble from another territory, who is known for being trash, is kinder and less intimidating and cares more about your people than you do. Like, I know this is unlikely but I feel like, if ever this bar/inn owner heard someone talk trash about Cale he’d be like idk he isn’t that bad. You know he actually stayed here once, one of his guards saved my life, and would kinda defend him a little, but he wouldn’t do that for Tolz. If a good way to tell what nobles are like is to look at how people in their territory act, then the fact this guy wouldn’t defend Venion or Tolz from criticism but arguably would defend Cale says more about Venion and Tolz than anything really. Especially after Cale becomes Young Master Silver Shield.

I may be wrong but this is the first time we see Cale actually mad/genuinely annoyed by someone right? For all he says Hans annoys him, he’s actually never seemed particularly annoyed at Hans. And everyone/everything else he’s been more surprised or scared than mad. He wasn’t even annoyed when he was brought to this world. On one hand I get it, I’m angry at Venion too. I just think it’s interesting to note.

Cale really thinks about everyone, even this old man.

Idk why but Something about Cale right now, the way he tells Choi Han to calm doen is so attractive to me. Maybe it’s how calm and level headed he is, maybe it’s how in control he seems. Idk. Also not important but in my head I don’t see red haired Cale Henituse, I see black haired KRS and idk why.

You know who I think of when I remember Venion? Years ago, when I first got Facebook I’d stumble across photos of like hunters posing with animals they’d just killed and looking so proud of themselves, and it always just filled me with anger and confusion. Like, I’m not a vegetarian or vegan but something about that just seemed so wrong to me. Venion reminds me of a worse version of those people. So pleased to see an innocent animal hurt and proud of themselves for having something to do with it.

When I tell you that reading this man’s torture/punishment scene will be so satisfying to me. He deserves so much worse than he got.

No he stole the carriage. He’s never even heard of Count Henituse. And those knights are paid actors. Why do people insist on asking obvious questions? To start conversation? There must be a better conversation starter than that. Honesetly how Cale hasn’t rolled his eyes at this amazes me. He doesn’t even think the sarcastic thing. I simply couldn’t do that.

I think Venion has bigger problems than being rude.

It makes sense that most people would just naturally be disgusted by him actually. Humans in general typically have fairly good instincts. We can kind of sense when others are terrible human beings. Obviously it isn’t perfect but it is there. The people who follow him probably either fear him or are just as terrible but if most people hate him, it’s probably not just because he’s rude. Venion would probably be too arrogant to pretend to be someone he’s not, so his bad traits would be fairly obvious and I think, when someone is this horrible, they can’t fully hide it anyway. He may not be advertising the Black Dragon thing but there is so much wrong with him and he has so many bad traits it would be impossible to hide them fully, if he even bothered to in the first place.

I don’t get how he’s convinced himself any version of Cale is somehow worse than him. The worst thing OG Cale did was probably what he said to Choi Han, that didn’t happen this time, so the worst he’s done is get drunk and trash some bars and shops. Meanwhile Venion has permanently injured and plans to murder his older brother, and is regularly entertained by a child, no, a toddler getting tortured. He needs to be smacked back down to, well, not earth, whatever their world is called.

Again, still don’t get how Venion would ever look like the better or superior one in this situation. His carriage nearly ran someone over, his lackey berated the person who saved the guy they nearly hit, and then he randomly tried to start shit with another noble and insulting him in public, when the other noble hadn’t actually said or done anything to anyone. No matter how you put it, Venion is the asshole in this situation, and everyone would see that so idk what superiority he thinks he’s showing here.

See Cale gets it. Why ask something you already know about? Oh so he can point out Cale is trash. pOk the trash is still like the least problematic person in this situation so really it just makes you look worse. Btw not saying Choi Han is problematic or anything, hopefully you get my point, it’s a rare occasion of Cale being the best behaved from the outside. Is behaved a word? If it wasn’t it is now.

Idk I think Cale’s doing pretty well at being a noble and this type of talk. If that was me I’d just be rolling my eyes every time Venion spoke.

Also fuck Marquis Stan. He’s just as responsible for Taylor and The Black Dragon and is a shit father and noble. He should’ve been tortured just as much as Venion. Idc.

Is the three other children including Taylor? Because if not 3 siblings and either none of them know or none of them care about the dragon being tortured. I’d like to give them the benefit of the doubt but idk if I can.

Ok so it doesn’t include Taylor.

And none of them care that the oldest brother was crippled by their other brother? Not one? Man, what is up with this family? Why do they all suck so much? Taylor deserves batter.

Imagine if KRS was transmigrated in the Stan family instead. He’d hate them so much but I feel like their downfall would come even quicker, and he’d still help Taylor and Cage because he doesn’t want to be the Marquis. He could even tell them about the black dragon to help Taylor take down his family. And he’d still be in the capital so be able to help with the plot. Can’t decide how he’d get the Shield, but idk, could be fun.

Kinda love how he refers to it as our family already. That’s cute.

Tbf I don’t think nobles not wanting to Take / associate with Deruth’s territory has much to do with it being greedy, because even if it would be greedy, what are the chances the other nobles would all care. It’s probably more to do with the Forest of darkness. Whoever’s responsible for Henituse territory is responsible for watching the Forest of Darkness and, let’s face it, most nobles won’t want that responsibility. Like looking greedy might be some nobles’ concern, but at least one noble family wouldn’t care about that.

This bitch really had the audacity to try and compare himself to Basen? Please those are two completely different relationships. Basen isn’t a complete psychopath/narcissist. And for that matter Cale isn’t Taylor. And did he really just try to call Taylor the trash eldest son and himself the pretty smart younger brother? God he’s delusional. It’s so much worse than I remembered. Delusional, arrogant, dumb, pathetic, horrible. There’s not a single good quality about this guy. Also claims he’s smart but doesn’t realise that Cale dislikes him, dare I say hate him, more than he hates Cale, but that could also be arrogance so idk.

If Venion didn’t like me and compared me to Taylor I’d take that as a huge compliment actually.

Hate to point this out again but he failed to appear as a proper noble when his carriage nearly ran someone over and his lackey blamed that person. Doesn’t seem very proper to me but what do I know? Maybe that is proper behaviour.

Also all these people just heard you call this man a waste of time and an obstacle. I know that some rich people do see poorer people like this but surely this is one of those things that, as a noble, you’re supposed to think but not say out loud? I know they’re not your people but it still seems wrong. Also wouldn’t it appear to most outsiders that he only told his lackey to stop because he realise another noble was there and he wanted to look good in front of him. Again, there’s no way Venion actually realistically comes out of this looking morally better or superior in any way to Cale.

You can practically hear the disgust in Cale’s thoughts. That’s truly impressive.

Don’t worry Venion. Cale did a very good job of teaching his people that distinction. Although his idea of people who have a right to walk this earth may differ from yours. Also again he just very publicly stated that this man, who hasn’t actually done anything wrong, doesn’t have the right to walk the earth or whatever… because he’s not a noble I guess?  Honestly, can you imagine a noble in our world saying this shit like in present time? I mean not much would happen lbr but everyone would at least be like we hate you, that’s a disgusting thing to say.

Also is now a good time to admit I have no idea how nobility actually works and therefore have no clue of the hierarchy?  Ok so google has informed me that Marquis is higher than Count and now I’m sad that a dragon torturer has a higher rank than Count Henitus, and say what you want about him, but at least he actually cares about his people to the best of his ability with the knowledge he has.

That’s offensive to dogs. At least sometimes when they yap it’s for a good reason, usually not but sometimes. (I’m not hating on dogs, I love dogs, I have two dogs, but they do tend to bark for no reason)

I don’t think there’s actually a word for how much I hate this man. Hate and despise come close but feel too weak a word. loathe maybe but every time I think of the word loathe or loathing I think of the song from Wicked, and that song could so easily go the complete opposite direction. Maybe abhor but again these words feel too weak. They don’t fully capture the anger, the disgust, the complete inability to find even one good thing about him.

What I’d give to see Choi Han punch him, just once.

The Tolz family also seem like idiots but they also seem too pathetic to actually hate? Like they just go along with keeping a dragon on their territory and letting the Marquis torture it there? Dumb, dumb as hell. I’d feel sorry for them but they brought it on themselves and so instead I look about them in about the same way I imagine most people look when they see Florida Man in the news, just a why would you do that? Confusion but still more angry than I probably would be at most Florida men or similarly stupid people in the news. A more confused version of the anger I feel when there’s a child abuse story in the news and one of them is like oh but I didn’t abuse them, when there is proof they knew it was happening and were fine with it/amused by it/encouraging it or just didn’t care. You know what I change my mind I do hate the Tolz family, just less than Marquis Stan and Venion. But yeah fuck the Tolz family too. Being pathetic and dumb is no excuse honestly.

Cale needs a reward  or something purely for not punching this man.

Also can we tak a second to discuss the difference in anger and how it’s expressed by Choi Han and Cale. The best way I can put it is Choi Han’s anger is like fire, right? It’s heated, passionate, comes on and spreads quickly and suddenly, is very destructive, hard to stop and contain, though it can be, and is harder to hide. Cale’s anger is like water, like the ocean. It’s cold, he looks very calm on the outside, so you don’t realise he’s angry, but under the surface he’s raging. I’ve always thought the ocean was beautiful and at the same time thought it was one of the most terrifying things there is, and not just because I can’t swim. With fire, the danger is there, it’s obvious, you know it’s dangerous, you know if you touch it you’re gonna get hurt, you’re gonna get burned, and that leaves a permanent mark. But the ocean isn’t like that, the danger isn’t as obvious, at least if you can swim, you could go in the ocean a million times and be just fine, and then one day you get stuck in the wrong tide, and you try to fight against it but you can’t. and there’s so much we don’t know about the ocean, so much mystery surrounding it, a lot of stories, some true, some not true. And the most dangerous thing about the ocean is how peaceful it looks, how calm, how it lures you in. even though I know I can’t swim, I still feel the urge, when I see the ocean, to just jump in, even though I know that would be a very bad idea. A lot of this applies to Cale, there are a lot of stories and rumours about him, he looks more calm than he is, he draws people in, a lot of those people survive and are just fine, but some get dragged away by the tide. The thing is fire and water, with all these differences, still have similarities: they both can hurt/kill you, and they can both be suffocating, and they’re both pretty to look at but can hurt you if you’re not careful. And that just feels so similar to Choi Han and Cale to me. Plus Cale managed to calm Choi Han down, a bit like water can douse a fire and put it out. Cale is water, Choi Han is fire, they’re both forces to be reckoned with and Venion pissed both of them off. He played with fire multiple times but he also earned the ocean’s fury, and an angry ocean… well, we all know how terrifying, how dangerous, that can be. This turned out more poetic than I intended so I’m gonna go ahead and move on.

Again he’s awfully judgy for someone who gets his kicks from torturing a 4 year old.

Cale subtly messing with Venion by purposefully using the hand he helped the old man with to shake Venion’s hand. Also the fact Cale is more disgusted to touch Venion and Venion doesn’t realise it.

also is the lackey a servant? I thought they were but idk. Oh well, not important

Cale’s ability to say these things without giving away that he’s lying is truly impressive.

Oh good, Venion’s gone. I apologise that this one is more angry/less positive. I just can’t stand Venion or people like him.

Cale: lowkey rants about everything wrong with the interaction with Venion

 also Cale: I’m not that angry though

maybe not angry necessarily but he is very much disgusted. Even then he is a little angry, which is fair

again don’t get how exactly Cale would look bad in this situation, especially when compared with Venion

honestly Choi Han and Cale’s conversation here is actually great. Cale almost comforts Choi Han, and shows that he understands how Choi Han feels and where he’s coming from, and he agrees with him. He validates Choi Han so much but his plan to destroy Venion is different. Choi Han could and would beat Venion up, maybe even kill him, but Cale, Cale takes the things he and the Marquis care about the most, their status, their power, their image, their money. For people like Venion and the Marquis that’s much more devastating than a beatdown they could recover from and use as ammunition. And then he doesn’t even really ask or demand Choi Han helps him, he offers, gives him the chance to decide or agree to help on his own, and it’s such a subtle difference, but an important one nonetheless. Also don’t think either of them realise but they’re already besties at this point.

Choi Han is such a delight

Here’s the thing, Cale was already pissed at Venion before they even met and now he’s made him even angrier. i don’t think anyone can help him now. Like he was already beyond help but, now, it’s not just I’m going to punish you for what you did to Raon. It’s I’m going to do that and I’ll enjoy every second of tearing you apart and watching you be clueless I’m responsible until it’s too late. God I love that version of KRS Cale. Kinda want a dark Cale fic now. Not necessarily a villain but also kinda. Same Cale, just wants his people safe, but if anyone regardless of the side their on messes with his people they get the same treatment as his enemies, whether they’re a hero, villain, neutral. And where he enjoys bringing them down as well. Idk the idea of dark KRS Cale is so interesting to me. And slowly the characters around him become just as dark. Like he simply can’t lose anyone else so if anyone poses even the slightest threat to his people, they’re very quickly dealt with. Anyway not important

[unparalleledtrash]

💎Seventeen as TCF/LCF Characters [3/13]

🦌Hong Jisoo (Joshua) as Taylor Stan🦌

Gentlemen. Joshua is a self-proclaimed Gentleman of SEVENTEEN. I also see Taylor as a gentleman. It's the vibes of these two.

They have a special bond with their Cale/Jeonghan. Taylor sees Cale as a symbol of luck [Chapter 393]. Ever since he met Cale, his life took a turn for the better. For Joshua, Jeonghan is also somewhat a symbol of luck. Like... their predebut training is hard, both have thought of quitting, but they endured that training because they had each other.

Exhibit A:

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSLVEYGCW/

They're bold in their own ways.

Exhibit B: (for Taylor Stan)

"Compared to his gentle appearance, Taylor was a risk-taker. That was how he was able to be in front of Venion, even with his ethical personality, before he was attacked." [Chapter 28]

Exhibit C: (for Joshua)

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSLqJMRwK/

They can be cunning. They have bent rules before. Joshua is part of the Evil Twins of Seventeen (with Jeonghan) (which is why he could also be Alberu but let's talk about Alberu later). So, during variety shows, he has cheated and manipulated before. Taylor has also done the same. Although not as much as Joshua but the fact that he still went with it means he knows when to use dirty(?) tricks. *SPOILER* I'm talking about Chapter 393 where they faked an ancient document to deceive/manipulate White Star.

Exhibit D: (Taylor helping Cale in a scam)

“You want me to create a fake ancient document?” Cale started to smile. “Is it not possible?” “It is illegal.” Taylor looked toward Cale with a serious expression. “But I will give it a go.” Alberu started to chuckle. “Look at these nobles talking about breaking the law inside the crown prince’s bedroom.”

Exhibit E: (Joshua helping Jeonghan to cheat)

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSLqJm8SK/

MASTERLIST

[weirdsht]

Platitude (Cliché pt. 2) - LoTCF & Venion Stan! Reader

notes: I didn't plan on making a pt. 2 but the idea has been haunting me even in my sleep. If you haven't read pt. 1 I recommend you do. Most of the context in this fic will be seen there.

tags: Reader will be referred to as Venion, Raon focused, mention of torture, mention of vomit, hints of eating disorder, angst (not really I think), hurt/comfort(?), hopeful ending

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome

Requests are currently closed but my ask are still open (read navi)

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Navigation Masterlist Cliché (pt. 1)

He is great and mighty.

The dragon believes– knows that he is great and mighty.

He has known it since his he hatched from his egg. Knows that his kind is the greatest existence to ever grace this world.

Despite all those things, he can’t show just how great and mighty he is. 

And it’s all because of these stupid chains that shackle him down. Chains that restrict his movement. Chokers that rendered him unable to speak and use magic.

It doesn’t make him any less great though. He’ll be even more great and mighty once he can use magic but he is plenty great and mighty now.

That’s what he tells himself every day. What he tells to comfort himself as this atrocious noble named Venion Stan tortures him. What gets him by day by day without giving up. Without succumbing to the pain.

Words that he whispers to himself might be words of comfort, but it is not unfounded. Even at merely 3 years old. Even without magic. He is still a majestic existence. 

For he still has his wits. 

Hence why he noticed that Venion Stan is unwilling in the things he does. At first, the black dragon thought someone else was ordering him and he had no choice but to follow. Perhaps someone like the Marquiss, his father.

“Sto– ugh!”

“Did you say anything, young master?”

“No. Something just got stuck in my throat.”

That was the moment the dragon decided to look at it from a different perspective. 

He was sure Venion Stan was about to say “stop”, but was unable to because an unknown force was physically stopping him.

After that day he decided to observe the noble’s actions. 

Slowly but surely he connected the dots. Saw the signs of unwillingness in his eyes. Noticed how he would deliberately twist his words to sound evil because something would stop him if he didn’t. Felt the way Venion would secretly care for him. 

Witnessed how his eyes died a little more every visit.

The baby dragon is the one being tortured. However, he can’t help but feel pity for his torturer. Venion Stan’s mental anguish is deep. So deep that those green eyes of his almost look black from how soulless they are.

Both of them are unwilling victims in this situation. 

Once the dragon realised this fact, his heart could let go of some of his hate a little. It’s not fully gone. It can never be fully gone until he gets his revenge. Because how dare lowly humans capture and torture someone great and mighty like him?

However…

He is not irrational. He knows how to give credit where it is due. 

And in this situation that credit mostly belongs to whoever is controlling Venion Stan’s body. That and he once overheard that a secret organization is responsible for capturing him.

The black dragon believes that they must be the ones to pay the price of his wrath. 

Which was why he has decided to look kindly upon Venion. 

Over the course of the year, they have spent together, the cell the black dragon lives in has become more comfortable. Pillows and other soft objects are placed everywhere. Warm lighting replaced the white, cold ones. His chains are not as heavy and even have soft fur in them. Sometimes, he can even eat delicious and filling meals.

His living conditions are great. Well, great for a prisoner at least.

The same thing can’t be said for his torturer.

Venion Stan looks like he's the one being tortured. And honestly, the dragon also thinks so. He has gotten skinnier. The bags under his eyes have gotten deeper, as well as the despair in his eyes.

His not even eating anymore. At first, the black dragon thought that it was just an excuse to give him the food.

“Young master, I’m sorry to interfere but you did not eat dinner. You also barely ate during breakfast. This lowly servant of yours urges you to eat more.”

Oh…

It wasn’t just an excuse to give him the food.

The black dragon had at least hope that Venion Stan was eating his fill. He needed it, with all the vomiting he does. It’s bad for him to not eat anything…

Bleurgh!

Speaking of vomiting. Another thing the dragon had noticed was how there seemed to be blood in his vomit nowadays. He hypothesises that it has something to do with the young noble pushing the unknown restrictions to make him more comfortable.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

“Young master! Are you okay!? I’ll go call for a healer!“

“No need. This is just from the heat outside.”

The black dragon observes as blood drips down from Venion’s nose. It happened almost immediately after he ordered his men to lessen their business in the back alleys.

Blood must be the payment whenever a restriction is violated. However, Venion Stan doesn’t seem to be aware of it. It looks like he truly thinks it’s just from the heat.

Luckily it doesn’t happen again.

The blood in his vomit was still there, but he didn’t have a nosebleed after that incident.

Not that the dragon cares of course. He just thinks that it will be a pity if Venion drops dead before he can get his revenge.

Venion Stan must stay alive until he can get his revenge.

“I promise after tonight everything will get better…”

The fool whispered in his ear one random night. He was merely resting his eyes but Venion must’ve thought he was asleep and begun whispering a bunch of nonsense in his ear.

But he lets it be.

He doesn’t know why, but his instincts are telling him to pretend to sleep and see what Venion will do.

It was silent for a few moments, but then he suddenly felt a soft hand stroking his head. The hand was skinny. Boney even. It wasn’t the ideal head pat. Nonetheless, the black dragon felt an odd sense of comfort as Venion stroked his head.

Plop

Plop

He felt two lone tears wet his horns. Tears that are full of suffering. The tears of someone who is carrying a different shackles than what the dragon does.

After that, like a dream, Venion Stan goes out of the cave.

When he opened his eyes again he could see servants removing the decorations that adored his cell. Turning it back to how it used to be; cold and uncomfortable.

For a moment the dragon thought Venion Stan was abandoning him.

The thought alone makes him feel a sense of dread. But he doesn’t know why. For surely, it can’t be because he has learned how to care for that cold-hearted bastard.

‘But he isn’t really cold-hearted…’

He pushes his thoughts away as this mysterious red-haired man carries him out of the cave. Showed him what the night sky looked like for the first time.

The mysterious man sets him free. He doesn’t try to keep him. Tells him to live his lie how he wants to.

And that’s exactly what he does.

He felt a sense of attachment to the man named Cale. So he follows him around. Hunts food for them to eat.

But that’s not the only thing he has been doing.

One night, for just one night a few days after his escape. He doesn’t follow Cale Henituse.

Instead, he follows Venion Stan.

It was easy to track him down. Both men are going to the capital after all. It merely took minutes for the toddler to find out where he was.

Honestly, he has no good reason why he would visit his torturer. Maybe it was curiosity. Maybe it was to ensure he didn’t drop dead before he got his revenge.

Nonetheless, the dragon visits Venion to see the terrible state he is in.

Terrible doesn’t justify the state Venion is in.

As the black dragon peeks at the windows he can see the blonde sitting straight in his bed. With nothing but a singular candle to accompany him in his large, and lavish room.

Venison Stan looks horrific. There’s nothing behind his green eyes. No emotions whatsoever. His eyes were green but they looked like black holes.

He looks like those creepy things On has told stories about. The ones possessed by ghosts and don’t know who they are anymore.

Yeah, that was it. 

Venison Stan looked like someone who has lost his sense of self.

He looks like a puppet waiting desperately for his strings to be cut off.

“One more year… Just one more year and everything will end… I have laid out everything. Have done everything I could.”

Venison Stan started muttering to himself.

“But why? Why must I suffer like this? Was I that bad in my past life?”

His voice was emotionless, yet the dragon could hear his despair loud and clear.

“I think I lived decently… I did, right? Maybe I thought it wrong? Maybe I was atrocious… Maybe I deserve this. Maybe I’m meant to not be able to have free will. Maybe the gods thought that giving me free will is a bad idea…”

Venion did not spill a single tear. But the dragon could tell he was weeping.

Unable to hear anymore, he flew back to where Cale and the others were.

That night he feels his heart become as heavy as the choker that used to chain him down.

“...It’s okay. I said it’s okay”

The black dragon mumbled to himself as Venion Stan walks by.

He may feel a sense of kinship with the noble but it does not erase the trauma he has experienced. Even if he knows it was traumatizing for Venion too.

But just like he couldn’t stop his shaking limbs when Venion approached them with that vicious look he had. He also can’t stop himself from checking how the blonde is doing.

‘He still eats so little… His dizzy, he grits his teeth like that whenever he feels dizzy from not eating enough.’

The emotions other people had mistaken for anger... only the black dragon could decipher what they truly mean.

Maybe time really brings a sense of familiarity.

But he keeps his mouth shut. Doesn’t tell anyone, not even Cale, of Venion’s real state.

Because he doesn’t care. He shouldn’t care.

He doesn’t care but he still checked on Venion during the terrorist attack. Makes sure that he is alive and in one piece. 

He doesn’t care but still thinks about him every night. Thinks about those mutterings he heard that night.

He doesn’t care but he hopes and prays that Venion has not dropped dead yet. Hopes that his eating as well as Raon is doing.

He doesn’t care, it’s all just part of his revenge. He must get the perfect revenge.

But the sweet, young dragon could only lie to himself for so long.

“Human…”

Raon spoke the night before they were supposed to kidnap Venion Stan.

“There’s something I haven’t told you about that bastard.”

Cale opens his ears as Raon spills everything. Listens to every word coming out of the toddler's mouth. 

And after all that Cale asks him.

“What do you want to do now?”

If he doesn’t want to proceed Cale wont force him. That’s what he likes the most about his human. Cale respects every decision he makes. Attentively listens to everything he has to say.

“I still want to kidnap him. But… I don’t want to torture him. He has already been tortured enough.”

Raon buries his head on Cale’s chest. He stops his tears from flowing.

“Human, his still suffering. Even after my chains got removed, his shackles remained.”

“Okay, we’ll do what you want.”

Cale doesn’t fully comprehend what he means but he respects his decisions. Raon knows that Cale doesn’t understand.

“You’ll understand what I mean once you see his eyes.”

That was the only thing he said to his human. He wanted Venion’s gaze to tell the rest of the tale.

Venison Stan did not disappoint.

He delivered exactly what Raon wanted to show everyone.

Showed everyone just how much melancholy his eyes held.

In fact, there’s so much anguish hidden behind those eyes of his that even Raon was shocked.

If Raon thought Venion’s state was terrible a year ago, he has no words to describe him now.

The man looks dead. No, he looks like his desperately waiting for death.

And it brings a sick feeling to Raon’s stomach.

“Do you have any questions left for him?”

Cale asks after the blonde man faints from coughing blood. He says no, his curiosity has been quenched. The answers he provided and the clear repercussions of his restriction satisfied Raon.

“Human ask him for Venion’s servant! The granny that wears her hair in a bun! She knows just how little that punk eats!”

“Tell him about how he can’t control his words and actions! Tell him about how doesn’t want to do most of the things his doing!”

“Human what sentence did Venion Stan get? Is he okay? You told them to not send him to prison right? You told them he didn’t have a choice right?”

“Human, are you busy? Can you call Taylor and ask him how Venion is doing?”

“Are we going anywhere this week? If not can we go visit the Stan territory?”

“Maybe if I bring him apple pies he’ll eat more?”

Raon doesn’t even know what his doing. He doesn’t realise just how much he is looking after his supposed torturer.

However, no one calls him out on it. They just indulge the child and let him do whatever he wants.

“Venion is inside that room young master. You can try to speak to him but it’s unlikely that he’ll respond… Are you sure you want to go in alone?”

Taylor Stan asks one more time and Cale just nodded in affirmation.

“If you need any assistance a servant will be waiting here.”

With that Taylor leaves leaving Cale to enter Venion’s room alone. Well, he and Raon but Taylor doesn’t know about the dragon’s existence.

“He also looked like this when I visited him that one night.”

As soon as the door closed, Raon turned off his invisibility and flew over to the bed where Venion was sitting up.

“But that time he looked more alive. He looked like he was looking forward to something. Turns out he was looking forward to his death but that it was still a better look than what he has right now.”

Cale clicks his tongue but Raon ignores him. Instead, he directed his words to Venion.

“That night, before the human got me out of that cave. I’m sure you remember it. Did you know that I heard what you told me that night?”

Raon feels like Venion is listening to him.

“You told me that after that night everything will get better. And it did, after that night everything did get better for me.”

The toddler placed his paw on top of Venion’s still hand.

“But what about you? Why did nothing get better for you after that night? Even now you’re still being tortured. You’re shackles are still holding you down even after you broke mine.”

Raon raised his shaking paws to hug the man. From the side, Cale merely observes, ready to step in when needed.

“Consider this as payment for patting my head that night.”

The black dragon feels a lone tear grace his head. He doesn’t say anything about it. He didn’t even raise his head to look at Venion.

They stayed like that for at least 2 minutes. At some point, Venion’s arms had also embraced Raon. His hold was weak and lifeless. Like when you force a teddy bear to encircle his arms around you. 

But it’s the best he can do right now, and Raon will take it.

“We have to go, but before we go I’ll leave you one of my apple pies.”

Raon places a lone apple pie on the nightstand.

“Beacrox made it! He makes delicious food! Maybe if you eat something that tastes good you’ll eat more! Next visit I’ll try to save some of the Crown Prince’s cookies for you to try!”

With that, Raon waved his hand goodbye after promising to visit again.

A few days after that meeting, Cale receives an update from Taylor Stan saying that his brother is eating a bit more now. He excitedly tells Cale how he's been eating the desserts Raon sends.

Cale smiles at the thought of Raon’s happy face once he hears how Venion Stan is slowly recovering.

And indeed Raon was elated at the news. He immediately urges Cale to go visit Venion again.

He may not be fond of the guy, but Cale smiles a little as his kid frantically packs a bunch of things to bring to the Stan territory.

[slackerlifewhere]

random thought #4: no romance

I appreciate that the author doesn't add a romantic subplot for her characters just because they're of the opposite sex.

Like Cage and Taylor who, if this is a tv show, would've immediately been tagged as a couple even if they're just good friends. They're the best of friends who really care deeply for each other and right from the start, I never saw their bond as a romantic one. It's special since they understand each other so well because of their burdens and similar sense of humor. Like imagine how devastated Cage must've been in TBoaH. It must've been like losing a part of herself, her other half.

Yeah, I can see the idea that they can be a couple but it's so nice to see that the author just focuses on their friendship throughout the first part of TCF instead.

Then there's that time when Cale had Rosalyn and Choi Han help out Lock.

Cale clapped once, before pointing at Choi Han and Rosalyn.

“That is why we will pretend that you are the mother and father, or, if you do not like that scenario, then you shall be the older brother and older sister. You two will need to figure out how to protect him.”

- Chapter 30: You

I love the fact that Cale just gives them options to choose from so they can feel comfortable with each other. Especially since he knows they literally just met a few days ago. I also think that they just give off sibling vibes. Like Rosalyn and Choi Han never gave off anything else but friendship or family vibes and it's just so nice to see it happen.

I don't hate romance, okay? I actually love them. That is, when I look for that specific genre. If I'm not looking for it and it's there, I usually feel annoyed. Sometimes, it's not tagged but it still happens in the story.

I just find it exhausting at times when novels or tv shows push for romance when there's no need or reason for it. Especially the love at first sight trope. That one just aggravates me.

Like they can explore how close two characters are without putting a romantic context to it. In fact, the "romance" that we get in TCF are mostly from Deruth and Violan and from Deruth and Jour. It can't be said it's romance either since the focus on them is about the whole family instead. Other characters never show any sign of being in love with someone either.

And I also love the fact that Cale, the main character, doesn't have a romantic relationship throughout the whole first book. He has no time for one since he's in the middle of a war, he's focused on protecting his friends and family, and he's busy fighting some crazy bastards. He never looked at another person and thought he was in love.

If Yoo Ryeo Han ever adds romance later on, ✨I still hope she doesn't✨, it's easier to accept since I know these characters are close to each other. They've been together since the beginning. They bonded and experienced a lot of good and bad things together. Although it'll be weird to me...

[On an unrelated note: If this whole post looks weird, it's because I haven't slept yet]

[valdeswan]

Currently rewriting a songfic that I made years ago about Cale and the Alcoholics™ (Bud, Cage, Taylor) partying

Is in Spanish but I can try write it in English, is not gonna be so good because I never took an English lesson in my life and a bot is helping me with the grammar lol