#tr prof red

[itsgirlcraft]

Okie dokie mfs hereeee comes the TR weirdcore au!! >:3

This was posted on yt originally, btw.

TRIGGER WARNINGS: blood, unsettling imagery, unreality, paranoia, eyes/mouths where they shouldn't be, body horror

@its-indigos feels like your vibe ngl

Have fun!!! :D

First off, Sabre (thruout series) and a Yellow Steve, then Twisted Rainbow and The Great One:

Next up we've got: Elite/Shadow, M, and Assistant Steve

And finally there's The First Curse, Hypno, and Prof. Red!

I love violence and murder /lh

Shoutout to Ena's Dreamcore Picrew, which is now sadly gone, for the designs! Miss you </3

Sooo- we've got Assistant, Sabre, and Hypno as TV heads, Shadow/Elite as a scribble head/abstract head, M and the Yellow Steve as flower heads, TFC and Twisted as lollipop heads, and Prof. Red and TGO as eye heads.

Idk if that's what you call that but whatever. I had fun with the symbolism :D

Okok so let's just get into the AU first- I'll explain the designs along the way ig-

The AU starts off with the ladybug duo arriving in a weirdcore version of their universe, having changed with it. Since the actual picrew's outfits didn't have hands, they don't have visible hands either. They also notice their outfits are completely different yet slightly emulate their original outfits still. Pretty much everything about their actual appearance is the picrew design entirely, and they notice this.

Later on, eyes appear in the centers of M's roses. At first, Shadow takes on the first design - headless, with an abstract rectangle with question marks around it. Later on, once he recognizes his identity as Sabre's shadow, he has the scribble head with a single eye.

They travel into the core/lab, which has transformed into an ever-changing abandoned building. It is made up of many, many weirdcore and edited real-world images, constantly shifting. At first, it has no door and directly leads into the core, where they find Assistant's strangely non-mechanical body laying in a pool of blood. The inside of the core looks more like an abandoned house than a labratory or anything like it's canon appearance.

M tries to pick up the broken machine, but Assistant begins to glitch...physically, clipping through the ground, spazzing out, like you'd see happen to an npc. Shadow is wary, warning M not to touch them. At first, he listens. But concern for both his uncle and the robot brings him to grab them protectively, just as they glitch again...

M's and Assistant's heads swap, leaving M catatonic and Prof. Red awake. Shadow was about to attack, or run, he wasn't sure what, but he remembered that this machine mattered a lot to M. And if this machine has a sentience, he's going to get answers, whatever this...thing is that's swapped heads with the poor apprentice.

Prof. Red, still without a voice, manages to get Shadow to explain. He tries his best, explaining that M tried to help Assistant and that the whole world had become strange. Unable to communicate much, Prof. Red had to turn to using the blood on the ground to write on the wall. Shadow asked him, "who are you, and why does M care for you so much?" The half-dead scientist responded, "uncle of M."

Things started to click for Shadow at last, but he still had so many more questions. But he knew the one he wanted to ask. "If the world were normal, I'd be able to see that you, too, are a Red Steve, since you and M are related. If the world were normal, the robot's head could just be taken off.. But things aren't normal anymore. I don't know why you're... apparently inside that robot, or how long. But if you're willing to, can you try taking that robot's head off? I don't want to lose him..." Prof. Red nodded, knowing what may happen to him if this just reverses the head swap. The glitch intensified as Prof. Red held M, still trapped in Assistant's body. And once again, trapped in his own creation.

M woke up, disoriented, the pain in his neck vanishing. His eyes opened up, only to see the fallen body of Assistant Steve holding him, completely unresponsive. M rushed to stand up, and looked to Shadow, and then to the words written in blood. "Your uncle is in there. He returned to...whatever this fate is, for you.." Shadow said, nervously looking at what once was a machine. The glitching started almost as soon as he'd spoken.

M jumped, not wanting to go through..that again. M was uncertain what to do now, unwilling to leave his uncle behind, but unsure how to save him without sacrificing himself. Shadow convinced him to look for help or resources, since clearly Prof. Red didn't want M sacrificing himself for him, and M reluctantly left the core with Shadow.

In the ruins and dying forest, things are still strange. Above the duo, the sky is lined with eyes and symbols and patterns. Some patterns hurt to look at, too bright and yet somehow alluring to stare up at. They moved quickly into the shade of the trees that still had leaves, avoiding the sky as much as possible. The trees had strange eyes in their knots and in the dark spaces between leaves, but things felt a little safer when unexposed to the sky. The grass and dirt squished strangely beneath their feet, not unlike flesh or rubber. Something... different.

They kept moving. Looking. Trying to ignore the questions that came with every step. But then they saw a strange glow coming from between the trees, and an all too familiar voice with it... Sabre. Neither were prepared to face him, whatever he'd become. But what arrived was not the vengeful man he'd been before. (They're all more or less from the beginning of the last episode, forgot to mention that.)

Sabre wore a long sleeved, white shirt with a collar, and where his head should've been was a broken TV with a deep red heart on it, casting a strong glow against the forest around him. But most notable was his fear. He was just as scared as them. He was from the past, before this world had wronged him. Before Shadow had hurt him.

Shadow wasn't sure if he should be relieved or terrified, but he certainly felt both. As was M. Sabre didn't know where he was, but he knew this world wasn't normal. He didn't know normal, but he knew this...wasn't right. He knew he shouldn't be casting a glow on anything he looks at, he knows trees and skies don't have eyes.

But all he wanted was to find a person. Anyone at all. A tree with eyes is not a person. They didn't respond to his cries of loneliness. He saw the duo and couldn't tell if they, like so much else, were unresponsive and silent. Objects. But when he finally saw M had eyes that looked back at him, he knew they were real. "Hello?"

Silence.

Maybe he was wrong.

"Hello? Are you...okay?"

"I knew it! I knew you were real!!" Sabre was so excited to finally find someone out here that he completely disregarded the question. He started running towards them, the heart beating against the cracked monitor. And then stopped, realizing they flinched as he grew near. "...sorry. I got excited.."

"...it's alright."

Sabre noticed the one lacking a head at all was the one speaking, while the rose-headed one simply watched. It didn't scare him. Being alone scared him.

"Sorry if I scared you, I've been wandering around here for so long..I was starting to think I was completely alone." Shadow noticed Sabre's heart glitch, just like Assistant, when he mentioned being alone.

"I get it. We've been looking around...found things we didn't want to see. I wasn't sure what was out here."

"Oh? What kind of- wait yeah right I shouldn't ask..." he looked up at the sky, illuminating the treetops. "This place doesn't really make sense.."

"It really doesn't, even our clothes are different, it's so small but so obvious."

Sabre looked at his own outfit.

"Oh, that's what it is! Something kept feeling strange, I couldn't put my finger on it. ...And that everything glows when I look at it. Do you know why that's happening?"

"Oh, your head is uh..mechanical? It has a glowing screen."

"Wait, mechanical?" He reached up to touch his face. "Wha..it's totally flat..?" The heart glitched to an eye. "This..doesn't feel right..." The eye kept glancing around quickly, trying to understand what was happening. "Can you..describe it?" Fear was settling into his voice.

Shadow glanced to M. M pushed him as if to say, "this is your mess, now clean it up!" Shadow looked back to Sabre. "You have a black box with rounded edges, the screen has cracked glass. Beneath the screen, there's several dials and buttons. The screen shows a de-saturated green background. Originally it had a deep red heart on it, but when you got scared, it changed to an eye quickly glancing around." The green background temporarily shifted to monochrome static, before Sabre let his hands down. It returned to green, and, eventually, the heart.

"...thanks. That..makes me feel a little better. It's hard to find anywhere to see yourself properly. It's all weird and broken.."

"..yeah it is. Are you.. okay?"

"...I don't know. I'm just happy to find someone else out here."

"..."

"...What's your name? I'm Sabre..."

"Uh. I'm.. This is M. I'm...Elite."

"Oh, okay. Nice to meet you two."

Shadow kept thinking about the glitch. If it happened to Sabre, but he kept standing, then... No, there's no way that'd work. But if it did.. He wasn't sure if Sabre would agree, much less actually do it once he got to the core. But Shadow kept wondering. Finally, he asked.

"I know we've just met, but the way your heart changed to the eye...it reminds me of something we saw earlier, when M tried to help someone. We found this robot completely unconscious, and M tried to lift them, but then they glitched. Their body just...went out of wack. And when M tried to help again, they glitched while he was holding them, and the two..swapped heads?"

"What?"

"I don't know. But there was someone inside the robot, M's uncle. He tried helping M, but he swapped back and fell unconscious again. I don't know if it'd work, but it seems your screen glitches the same way and you're okay still... Maybe there's hope..?"

"Oh... so M's uncle is trapped in a robot? And it attached..itself to M when he tried helping them?"

"Yeah, pretty much.."

M looked excited but concerned.

"I wanna help. I don't really know what you want me to do, but sure. Helping someone is always important to me!" Sabre's heart beat stronger against the glass.

M nodded, still wondering if this was a good idea.

"..M thanks you. Are you sure you want to try this? The whole...swapping heads thing was terrifying, just from an outside perspective. And I should probably mention, the robot was laying in a pool of blood..."

"Blood?" Sabre gulped. "Well...I'll still try. I don't like blood. But things are so weird around here...it's practically worse than blood."

The trio went back to the core, but the interior changed. Now it had its elevator back, creaky and rusty, but working. A single light flickered menacingly inside. "This is...different?"

"What?"

"There was no door here, and it led straight into like..an abandoned house? But now there's an elevator here..?" Shadow contemplated whether they should do this or not. He looked to M, and remembered why they're doing this. "We can still try if you want, Sabre."

"Sure. I wasn't here before, so...I don't know what to expect."

They rode the elevator down. Its familiar mechanical screech was not comforting to M. It only reminded him of an echo of the past. Cold air flowed in from the core room. The red mass glowed strangely dim, its light barely touching the walls of the massive room.

"Where to..?" Sabre piped up first.

"Uh..to the right I think. M knows this place well.." Shadow looked up towards the walls around the elevator, recalling the fight he had with Sabre. He swore he could still see the green glow of the hole Sabre punched him through..

They followed M to where Assistant was usually held. Within the labratory room, the telltale blood could be seen even from the hallway. The robot was slightly more mechanical now. The orange long sleeve shirt was replaced with a short sleeved version, revealing rusted metal plating with peeling orange paint. Their jeans were now ripped, revealing pistons and torn wires in their knees.

"O..Oh...this is what you meant. I see..." Sabre tried to contain his nervousness, but seeing the ruined robot and room sent shivers up his spine.

M was the first to walk in. He knelt by Assistant, noticing the bloody words of his uncle still on the wall. The glitch revealed itself again. Sabre jumped, but stayed silent. It stopped just as suddenly as it'd started.

Sabre walked up to M. "Should I try just lifting them or try taking...off...the..head..?" He mumbled.

"Sorry, M can't speak. His voice is gone somehow..."

"Oh. Uh..nod once if lifting, twice if taking off the head."

He nodded once.

"Okay..well, uh, stand back just in case."

Sabre took a deep breath, waiting for the body to stop glitching. He picked up Assistant by the shoulders, setting them down away from the blood. He let them glitch again. He picked them up again with ease, and stood there, practically hugging them.

Waiting.

They glitched together.

Sabre held his breath.

Nothing happened.

"Oh thank God you're okay-" Shadow started, before Sabre looked at M. M nodded twice.

Sabre set Assistant down, and held their head with two hands. He tugged on it. Glitched. Again. He could feel a liquid dripping on his hands. He looked to M. M nodded. He tried again. On the third try, the TV flung off, making Sabre fall backwards. It wasn't just blood, but oil on his hands. It had splattered on the ground and walls around him. He dropped the TV carefully, disgusted, and looked up to Assistant. A single large, red eye opened where the TV once was.

[keepers-of-storycrafter]

Hellooo!! o/ we've finally put together the list of who else is currently in our universe!

More people may come later, so we'll update this as needed.

If you want more information on anything, let us know!

The Steve Saga: Memory, Light, Galaxy, Rainbow, Fake Blue, Illusion, Plague, Nightmare.

Rainbow Quest: Light, Prof. Red, O!Rainbow, Dark, Elemental, Void.

Steve Legends: Colle, Seer, Beef.

Twisted Rainbow: Assistant Steve, Prof. Red, M/Red Apprentice, Elite Dark Guard/Shadow Sabre.

Multiversal: Sabre, Time.

As a note, Sabre and I have memories from multiple universes, though I originate as RQ Time, and he as TR Sabre! At this time, RQ Elemental is starting to gain memories of The Steve Saga universe, but no one else has gained memories like us yet.

[bunnygirl678]

I don’t think I ever shared this au, might write it eventually, you know me I have a thousand aus and now I’m writing a bunch of pms, as always feel free to write it, draw it, do an interpretive dance to it, or just use it to fall asleep.

-Green is a little kid, Daisy is visiting a friend, some team rocket grunts break in and go against protocol (at least for this mission) and end up killing greens parents, little green locks himself in a closet

-one of the grunts (archer, who didn’t want to kill the oaks) calls the big boss (Giovanni) and tells him what’s going on

-Gio comes to the house and is like wtf, kills the grunts tells archer good job, he goes to the closet and archer thinks he’s about to kill the kid, instead Gio gets down and starts talking to him, telling him it will be okay, that he’ll make sure he’s safe

-green finally comes out of the closet (ha), and archer sees Gio go for his hip, he thinks he’s about to witness a child being killed, instead Gio gives him a piece of candy and picks him up, he puts a coat over his head so he can’t see all the bodies

- they go back to rocket compound, Gio is like I have a little boy just a bit younger than you, why don’t you go play with him

-Gio is like we’re keeping the kid, partially cause he’s a witness, but also he’s just a little older than silver and he doesn’t want to imagine his own son witnessing that

-green grows up as Gio’s kid, like he knows he’s not biologically his but Gio is a good dad, gives him whatever he wants ect… even silver is like his little buddy looks up to his “big brother”

-and green is his normal cocky self but he doesn’t have self esteem issues like he does in canon because Gio treats him well, just like his own son, introduces him as his son ect…

-It’s time for Green to go on his journey, he’s pumped because he wants to make his dad proud

-he meets red and they become instant bffs/mutual crush

-it’s all well and good until red beats him, then he’s pissed, daddy shows up and is like congratulations, Green, I’m proud of you, he’s happy, hugs him

-red is like “oh fuck the boy I have a crush on is the heir to the criminal organization I am trying to take down”

-red runs up the mountain cause he hates being champion, Gio announces his retirement from the gym and happy to announce his son will be taking over

-everything is fine, green wonders what happened to red really missed him ect, silver goes off on his journey in johto instead of Kanto (wants to be diff than big bro)

-tr still doing crime

-gold shows up with silver trailing him like a lost puppy (BBs first crush)

-green sees what his little bro wants and decides to mentor gold (then silver can hang out with him more)

-gold eventually goes up the mountain, tells green about red

-green goes up, they talk, both admit they liked each other back then

-reds like I can’t date someone who works for tr, green is like he’s just my dad! I’m the gym leader he doesn’t want me doing any of the crime stuff (that’s saved for silver)

-sloppy mountain make out

-red comes down they start dating, Gio is really funny about being like the stereotypical dad meeting the boyfriend

-they get older, gold and silver date,

-and then idk maybe red joins tr, came up with this while waiting for the train to pass and didnt flesh it out too much

-something with prof oak being like you look like my missing grandson and green is like shrug

[sygnasableye]

Trainer Red Headcanons

Since X Twitter is turning into a real dumpster fire of a site, I've decided to move my 'lore' threads over here so I still have access to them once I leave Elon's hellsite. First up is my interpretation of Red!

This iteration of Red is in his twenties, therefore taking place before his and Blue's trip to Alola. Teddy (OC) is briefly mentioned in this list.

Red is on the autism spectrum. Pokemon and battles are his main special interests, and playing with the brim of his hat is a stim.

He's bisexual.

He's selectively mute. As shown in Pokemas (and Smash Bros. too I guess), Red can talk -- he just typically doesn't unless he's with trusted friends & loved ones.

He's so incredibly in-sync with his main team that he no longer needs to issue commands in battle. When he was younger, he used hand signals to give commands; he still does this for mons that aren't on his main team.

Red wants to seem cool and mysterious to other people, and yes, this includes standing on an ice mountain to wait for challengers for a considerable amount of time. He probably read JJBA as a kid and thought Jotaro was the coolest dude ever.

He briefly had a crush on Green/Leaf (in my head they're the same person) back when they, including Blue, were on their Kanto journey together. He never told her and eventually lost that crush, but Green is still a very important friend to him.

Even roughly a decade later, Red still hasn't quite gotten over his loss to Ethan on Mt. Silver; it was his first real taste of defeat, after all. He does use it as motivation to train harder with his team, but although he respects Ethan, he's a bit nervous around him.

Red really, really likes bug pokemon. He doesn't battle with them often, but he likes to collect and raise them. One of his favorite bugs is Heracross, a reserve mon who he actually *does* battle with; he also particularly likes the Ledyba and Nincada lines as well!

Some time after the Sevii Islands adventure, Red caught a Mew after befriending it and earning its trust. He keeps Mew a secret from most people; only the closest of his associates (Pallet Town trainers, Prof. Oak, etc.) know about it.

If you claim to be a member of Team Rocket, even if you're kidding, Red will immediately challenge you to a battle you can't refuse. He does not take threats from TR lightly and will attempt to squash out any and all of their operations.

As gifted to him by Teddy, he has a Roaming form Gimmighoul that usually hangs out in his pocket or under his hat. It has a chest full of Gimmighoul coins in his room back in Pallet Town and will happily chill out there with his mom when it's not traveling with Red.

Red enjoys fishing because it lets him space out (until there's a bite on the line at least) and listen to the water's waves. "No thoughts, head empty" is a state of zen for him. He's not nearly as enthusiastic about fish pokemon as he is about bugs, though.

Strangled Red is canon to my interpretation of Red (and Blue). Red doesn't like to think about his former role model anymore and chooses to repress his grief into the back of his mind.

Red doesn't listen to much music outside of soundtracks from video games and shows of his youth, but he tends to enjoy most genres outside of very noisy, chaotic ones like metal and breakcore (they usually lead to sensory overloads for him).

Red's starter is Charizard, but he's closest to his Pikachu (nicknamed Pika; the only one on his main team to have a nickname) that he caught in Viridian Forest. Pika is outside of its ball more often than not and sometimes even serves as an emotional support mon for him.

Red is afraid of drowning and cannot swim. He is very envious of the Swimmer trainer class for this reason.

He hates shorts and how they feel on him. In his opinion, they are NOT comfy and easy to wear.

[kalosstarters]

Okay, it’s time to talk about this episode because oh boy I do have things to say.

So. Ignoring that whole battle thing (which I will get to later), I actually semi liked the other stuff that happened before it. 

-Hop challenging Ash to a battle without even introducing himself was p funny to me. Guess he isn’t quite at Leon’s level yet since Pikachu wrecked the wooloo with 1 iron tail 😅 (Makes sense, though)

-Also the introduction scene was p cool! There are many things I could bring up about it but at least in that scene Alain and Ash acknowledged each other’s existence. I may talk a bit more about this later but honestly it /really/ sucked that Alain didn’t get any proper interaction with the other characters before the battle and his first lines in general were at the 12th minute. Trust me, I did pay attention to it. But yeah, a note to the pokeani writers: you can’t expect me to enjoy a battle that has 0 build up. Apparently Alain had been excited to battle Leon? Well, WE WOULDN’T KNOW bc he literally didn’t say anything before the battle. 

-Iris was genuinely the best part in this episode because her enthusiasm over all the things was adorable :*)) Pls kick that Shirona’s butt, girl! (Well, unfortunately she won’t but goodness gracious give her a better battle than what Alain got). Also aww, she was so starstruck by the other female champions :’) (reminder to the writers tho that she did meet Cynthia before and she didn’t ask for a photo then :P)

-The champions commenting the battles together in the same room was a good idea. It’s cool to see them interacting with each other!

-Tbh Steven saying ‘I hope he won’t get overwhelmed’ was already a red flag to me; I had a feeling the battle would end badly after that. I can only hope Alain will still stay to watch the rest of the tournament...

-TR my beloved, finally you’re back! I’m so sorry JN has treated you so badly but I’m definitely looking forward to your commentary in the upcoming eps (let’s be real, they will 1000% be rooting for the twerp)

-I really was expecting this to be an ‘opening’ episode for the tournament but instead we got an entire battle within it... Guess I should finally talk about it a bit. Idk what else I can say other than the obvious ‘it was really bad’. Not even Charizard lasted long enough for this battle to continue to the next episode :d Maybe its meaning was to show Ash&the others that Leon rly is a freaking force of nature (he didn’t even use giga charizard!) but.... it really sucks that Alain was the character who had to be on the other end... Give him more credit than that. The dude beat 10 mega evolution users, incl. an E4 member, in a row. 

-To my disappointment the Chesnaught did not end up being Chespie bc we did see Chespie with Manon in Lumiose City. But you can’t take the HC that Alain still got inspired by Manon to use one from me. Overall I think a Chesnaught was a good writing choice for Alain bc it does make sense but I can’t say same for the Malamar. Alain may look edgy but considering that one of the creepiest TF guys had a Malamar I would like to think that he’d be hesitant to use mons that are somehow associated with that group.

-Getting back to Manon, thank goodness we did at least see a glimpse of her with Prof Sycamore watching the battle at the lab. Well, the ultimate option would have been to see them watching him at the STADIUM but I am guessing that pokeani team wasn’t willing to hire voice actors for them just for a couple of lines so that could have been the biggest reason why we only saw these glimpses of them. The other reason being that as much as I try to deny it, this is not Alain’s story anymore, it’s Ash’s, so the writers didn’t want to put too much focus on him. I just wish we could have seen a happier shot of my bb girl in the end ;____; My heart said </3 when I saw Sycamore comforting her. 

I could probably continue this even longer but maybe I’ll quit for now. In conclusion tho: I did like most of the non battle parts, I was happy to see Alain and even a glimpse of Manon BUT the battle was so bad that I can’t give very high points to this episode. The only thing that can save it in my eyes is that Alain will still stick around till the end of the tournament. We’ll see how that goes. Somehow I’ll have to wait 3 weeks to find out :d

[dillydedalus]

what i read in march

several antigones & some other stuff

call me zebra, azareen van der vliet oloomi

oh boy. i really wanted to like this one, but uh. nah. so this book is about zebra, a young iranian-american from a lineage of ‘autodidacts, anarchists and atheists’, still traumatised by her childhood experience as a refugee (incl. her mother’s death on route). when her father dies years later, zebra decides to retrace the route of her exile thru barcelona, turkey, and back to iran. this sounds great! the beginning is good! but zebra is a quixotic figure (don quixote is unsubtly flagged as THE intertext several times), delusional about her own importance, obsessed with some kind of great literary mission and obnoxious & condescending & egotistic as all fuck (she looks down on students but treats her realisation that like, intertextuality is a thing, as this grand revelation when like..... we been knew since Lit. Theory 101) - and this is intentional & part of the quixotic thing & in general i approve of abrasive & bristly & difficult female characters BUT i expected there to be a gradual process of realisation where she sees that a) maybe her entirely male lineage of geniuses ain’t all that, c) her mission is uh.... incomprehensible. instead, once she reaches spain, she gets bogged down in endless pretentious bullshit and a #toxic relationship that takes up way too much space. knowing that all of that is likely intentional doesn’t.... make it good. also the writing is pretty overwrought for the most part & not even your narrator’s voice being Like That excuses plain bad writing, like the  absurd overuse of ‘intone’ and ‘pose’ as dialogue tags. i see the potential and i see the point & i liked some of it but uh. not good. 2/5, regretfully, generously

in the distance, hernan diaz

i don’t really go for westerns or man vs wilderness stories but damn i’m impressed. despite the violence & deprivation and sheer amount of gross shit, this story of a swedish immigrant getting lost in the american west for decades remains at its core so human, so tender, so sad (honestly this book is SO SAD, yet sometimes oddly hopeful), so evocative of isolation, loneliness, and the desire for human connection. 4/5

notes on a thesis, tiphaine rivière (tr. from french)

god, if i ever considered doing a phd i sure don’t anymore. this is a short graphic novel about a young woman’s descent into academic hell while writing her dissertation about labyrinths in kafka. it’s funny, the art is expressive and fanciful, and it is incredibly relateable if you’ve ever tried to actually write your brilliant, glorious, intricately constructed argument down, battled uni administration or had a panic attack over how to phrase a harmless email to a prof. Academia: Not Even Once. 3.5/5

red mars, kim stanley robinson

this is a very long hard sci-fi novel about mars colonisation & terraforming, discussing the ethics of terraforming, the potentials of a truly ‘martian’ culture, and how capitalism will inevitably fuck everything up, including outer space. all of this is up my alley and i did really like the first half (early colonisation efforts), but the 2nd half (beginning of terraforming, lots of politicking) was a slog - i liked reading about how terraforming was going, but the rest was just bloated, scattered and confusing. also there’s a tedious love triangle the whole time. 2/5

dragon keeper (rain wild chronicles #1), robin hobb

i love robin hobb she really can write a whole 500+ page book of set-up, characterisation and politicking and make it WORK. anyway, this has disabled dragons, a quest for mystical city, lots of rain wilds weirdness, a dragon scholar in an unhappy marriage, liveships, a sweet dummy romance, and uh... a lil penpalship between two messenger bird keepers? not much happens but it’s so NICE & so much is going to happen. also althea & brashen & malta turned up & i screamed. 3.5/5

season of migration to the north, tayeb salih (tr. from arabic)

this is a seminal work of post-colonial arabic literature, a haunting tale of the impact of colonialisation, especially of cultural hegemony in the education system, the disturbing dynamics of orientalism and sex, and village life in a modernising post-colonial sudan. it’s important, it’s well-written, it’ll make you think, but fair warning, there is a lot of violence against women - it has a point but still uh... wow. 3.5/5

dune, frank herbert

SOMETIMES.... BOOKS THAT ARE CONSIDERED MASTERWORKS OF THEIR GENRE.... ARE WORSE. so much worse. the writing in this is atrocious (”his voice was charged with unspeakable adjectives”), herbert somehow manages to make court intrigue and plotting UNBELIEVABLY DULL and sure, it was the 60s, but i’m p sure people knew imperialism was bad in the 60s! the main character, the eugenically-engineered chosen one or whatever, literally spends years among the oppressed & resisting natives of a planet ruled by a space!empire and at the end he’s like ‘i own this planet bc imperialism is Good Actually’. emotionally neglecting/abusing your wife, who you (!!!) decided (!!!) to marry for political reasons bc you’d rather marry your gf is also Good Actually (cosigned by the protag’s mother....) the worldbuilding is influential for the genre, sure w/e, but mainly notable for there just.... being a lot of it, the whole mythology-science makes No Goddamn Sense, all around this is just Bad. Bad. 0.5/5 i hope the Really Big Worms eat everyone 

dragon haven (rain wild chronicles #2), robin hobb

this healed my soul after toxic exposure to dune. anyway w/o spoilers: everyone is very much In Their Feelings (including me) and there’s a lot of Romance and Internal Conflict and Feelings Drama and Complicated Relationships and Group Dynamics and also dragons, which are really like very big, very haughty cats who can speak, and a flood and a living river barge with a mind of his own (love u tarman!). it’s still slow and languid but so so good. also: several people in this have to be told that People Are Gay, Steven, including Sedric, who is himself Gay People. 4/5

an unkindness of ghosts, solomon rivers

super interesting scifi story set on a generation ship with a radically stratified society in which the predominantly black lowerdeckers are oppressed and exploited by the predominantly white upperdeckers, mixed in with a lot of Gender Stuff (the lowerdeckers seem to have a much less stable and binary gender system than the upperdeckers) and neuroatypicality. it’s conceptually rich and full of potential, but just doesn’t quite stick the landing when it comes to the plot. 3/5

sanatorium under the sign of the hourglass, bruno schulz (tr. from polish)

more dreamy surreal short stories (ish?). i didn’t like this collection quite as much as the amazing street of crocodiles, but they are still really good, even tho you never quite know what is going on. featuring flights of birds, people turning into insects, thoughts about seasons and time, fireman pupae stuck in the chimney, and the continuing weird fixation on adela the maid. 3.5/5

angela merkel ist hitlers tocher, christian alt & christian schiffer

a fun & accessible guide to conspiracy theories, focusing on the current situation in germany and the current boom in conspiracy theories, but also including some historical notes. i wish it had been a bit less fun & flippant and more in-depth and detailed bc it really is quite shallow at points, but oh well. also yes the title does indeed translate to ‘angela merkel is hitler’s daughter’ so. yes. 2.5/5

the midwich cuckoos, john wyndham

fun lil scifi story in which almost all women in sleepy village midwich are suddenly pregnant, all at the same time. the resulting children, predictably, are strange, creepy, and possibly a threat to humanity. i get that it was written in the 50s but it is strange to read a book where almost all women, and only women, are affected by A Thing, but all the main characters are men & no one tells the women ‘hey we think it’s xenogenesis’ -  like realistically 80% of women affected went to the Neighbourhood Lady Who Takes Care of These Things like ‘hello, one (1) abortion please’ and the plot just ended there. i still liked it tho! 3/5

antigone project

antigone, the original bitch, by sophocles (tr. by fagles)

god antigone really is That Bitch. that’s all i have to say. 4.5/5

antigone, That Bitch but in french, jean anouilh

the Nazi-occupied france antigone. loved the meta commentary on what tragedy is and how antigone has to step into the Role of Antigone, which will kill her “but there’s nothing she can do. her name is antigone and she will have to play her part through to the end”. i didn’t really like (esp. given the ~historical context) the choice to make creon much more sympathetic, trying to save antigone’s life from the beginning. hmm. 3.5/5

antigonick, anne carson

look, antigone really is That Bitch and you know what? so is anne carson. best thing i’ve read so far this year, don’t ask me about it or i’ll yell the task of the translator of antigone at you. 5/5

home fire, kamila shamsie

honestly i really wanted to like this bc politically it’s on point and an anti-islamophobia antigone sounds amazing, but it just doesn’t succeed as a book/adaption. it spends way too much time in build-up/backstory (the play’s plot only starts in the second half of the book!), waaayyy to much time on the weirdly fetishistic antigone/haimon romance, and even the most interesting characters (ismene & creon) don’t fully work out. sad. 2/5

currently reading: the magic mountain by thomas mann, but i should be done in a week or so! also: the paper menagerie by ken liu, a collection of sff short stories

[yusrinasabila]

Fokus

Dulu waktu SD (di zamanku, atau sekarang masih ya?) hampir semua orang memliki cita-cita yang sewarna. Kalau gak dokter, polisi, pilot, guru. Aku sendiri, dulu bercita-cita menjadi dokter dan bertahan hingga kelas 5 SD. Saat kelas 5 aku banyak mengamati orang-orang dengan segala jenis definisi sukses. Ada yang jadi pemain piano profesional, aku tertarik. Ada buku keren yang kubaca, aku tertarik jadi penulis. Nonton TV acara jalan-jalan ke alam ala Jejak Petualangnya Tr*ns 7, aku pengen jadi backpacker keliling dunia. Abis baca biografinya penemu-penemu semacam Marie Curie atau Isaac Newton, aku berambisi jadi ilmuwan. Pun ketika melihat temanku yang berkesempatan ikut pelatihan matematika di Jakarta bareng Prof. Yohanes Surya, aku pengen banget suatu hari menang olimpiade, atau ikut lomba bergengsi macem IMO/IPhO atau sebagainya.

Sampai suatu hari aku sendiri pusing dengan keinginanku yang terlalu beragam. Dan memutuskan untuk tidak terlalu memusingkannya.. Toh masih SD juga.

Saat SMP aku akhirnya merangkum semua keinginanku yang dulu muncul itu (yang aku rasa masih relevan), yaitu menjadi ilmuwan yang keliling dunia(menjawab keinginanku menjadi ilmuwan). Di setiap negara yang aku kunjungi, aku akan melakukan research dan menerbitkan jurnal(menjawab passionku yang suka menulis). Dan aku juga akan mengunjungi tempat-tempat alam disana untuk aku foto(menjawab keinginanku backpacking dan menjadi fotografer). Menarik!

Namun suatu hari(dan hari-hari berikutnya), ayahku mengungkit tentang keinginannya berwirausaha. Bercerita tentang perjuangan orang-orang yang memiliki bisnis ternama saat ini. Kemudian entah sejak kapan, muncul benih kecintaan pada dunia enterpreneur. Dan bertumbuh hingga saat ini.

Dalam perjalanan perkuliahan, tentu aku bertemu lagi dengan berbagai macam orang. Berbagai macam teman. Dan di umurku saat ini, 20an, banyak orang yang sedang semangat-semangatnya mengejar mimpi. Mengukir prestasi. Ketika mendekati masa-masa kelulusan(sekarang aku masuk tahun terakhir di kuliah), sangat wajar banyak yang membicarakan masa depan setelah lulus kuliah. Di umur awal 20an ini, kita banyak yang mempertanyakan diri sendiri. Begitu pula aku. Ada yang setelah lulus mau langsung kerja dulu, kemudian menikah, dan lanjut S2 Ada yang dari sebelum lulus udah mengincar beasiswa-beasiswa seperti LPDP dkk supaya bisa langsung melanjutkan S2 baik di dalam maupun luar negeri Ada  yang ingin berwirausaha Ada  yang langsung mau nikah dulu Ya...banyak pilihannya.

Lalu kamu sendiri bagaimana? Aku pengen banget membangun sebuah bisnis. Bisnis yang bermanfaat buat banyak orang. Tapi tentu membutuhkan modal. Tapi ini...Tapi itu...Apa kerja dulu aja ya? Nyari pengalaman dan modal dulu. Tapi kerjanya sampe kapan ya... Duh aku harus gimana biar sukses? Apa  kumaha, S2 dulu aja gitu ya? loh loh....kenapa jadi ga tentu arah gini

Wait. Kenapa bingung? just make your own definition. Your definition of success Memang iya, ketika nanti lulus kuliah, akan sangat banyak pilihan yang ada. But you can’t be everything. Ketika  banyak temanmu yang ingin melanjutkan S2, apakah kamu harus ikut S2 juga? Ya bisa jadi. Ketika banyak temanmu yang ikut conference sana sini, kamu harus seperti mereka? Ya bisa jadi. Ketika ada yang langsung terjun berbisnis, haruskah seperti itu? Boleh saja. Tapi hati-hati ketika kamu melakukannya hanya sebagai bentuk pelarian saja. Hati-hati ketika kamu memilih sesuatu hanya karena suara mayoritas. Hati-hati ketika kamu mengejar sesuatu hanya sebagai frame di hadapan orang lain. Lihat lagi dirimu, apa sebenarnya tujuanmu? tujuan akhirmu?

Ya, aku harus fokus. Karena ketika aku sudah memiliki definisi sendiri, harusnya aku tidak “terganggu” lagi dengan anak-anak muda keren yang terkenal karena kuliah di luar negeri, universitas bergengsi pula. tidak lagi “terganggu” dengan kakak tingkat yang baru lulus langsung kerja di perusahaan multinasional, atau kerja di perusahaan konsultan bergengsi. Tidak lagi “terganggu” dengan penulis-penulis yang karyanya jadi bestseller hampir di setiap judul. Tidak ada lagi perasaan bersalah karena tidak “sekeren” mereka, “sesukses” mereka. Karena aku fokus pada definisiku. I have my own. And everyone is unique.

Kalau kata temenku, everyone has their own red carpet. It’s ok melihat kesuksesan orang lain. Sebagai motivasi, sebagai pelajaran yang bisa diambil hikmahnya. Tapi untuk membanding-bandingkannya dengan definisi suksesmu? big no!

So start from now, be focus on your definition and work hard for it. Setiap orang punya definisinya, punya masanya.

Ah, tapi sebenarnya ada satu definisi yang seharusnya menjadi definisi setiap orang. Bahwasanya ada “kehidupan” lagi setelah hidup di dunia ini. Maka apapun definisi sukses duniamu, selalu fokuslah  pada definisi sukses  untuk “kehidupan” berikutnya.

Agar insya Allah selalu terdapat berkah pada setiap langkahmu Agar kamu bisa mencapai definisi tugas manusia yang sesungguhnya, yaitu beribadah Agar kelak tiada penyesalan

Bismillah...fokus, ya!

Rumah, 1 September 2017 | 20.15 WIB

[jannote-blog]

Bogor Kota Hujan dan PIMPI 2017

Cimahi, 25 September 2017 16.31 WIB

Alhamdulillah bisa mulai nulis lagi, let’s update this week life

1.       Alhamdulillah kolo sudah terjalani, tapi dengan sangat banyak kesaalhan dan revisi, kritislah pokoknya ga tau lagi mau bilang apa. Yang pasti di rabu nanti persiapan buat kepergian ke malaysia kamis paginya doakan semoga lancar dan selamat sampai tujuan.

 2.       Mengenai pimpi, gilaaa pokoknya gils keren2 parah sumpah inovasi yang dibuatnya ngeri2 dah emang pada total semua disini. PIMPI 2017 ini mengususng tema tg inovasi diversifikasi pangan. Pas hari pertama kita sampe ke bogor dari jaitnngor jam 15.00 p nugngu panitia sekitar 2 jam, baru nyame wisma amarilis jam 6 magrib dan itu mati lampu juga hha mantaps2 pokoknya. Di hari 1, itu Cuma kyk techmeet kita kyk dijelsin agenda acara bakal nagapain aja ama gmn sistem penilaian nanti. Yang ga disangka adalah pas hari ke 2 yaitu hari kita presentasi paper. Di hari ke2 kita presentasi paper sesuai sub tema paper yang kita daftarin, kelompok saya masuk ke sub tema 3 yaitu ttg konsep berkelanjutan intinya. Nah di sub tema 3 kan dijuriin tuh ama 2 orang dan ternyata salah satu juri nya adalah dari alumni unpad yaitu kang herdiyan ketua DKM Al Amanah 2011 (Agro 2008) sontak langsung kaget ama salaman atuh dan intinya ngobrol2 ternayta kang alghif juga lagi lanjutn kuliah juga di IPB S2 nagmbil agribisnis, gile2 pokonya jadi rame weh di hari ke 2. Intinya dari obrolan itu lebih ngetrigger kita utuk jadi penguasaha di bidang pertanian  dan bisa gabung dengan usaha pertanian dnegan para alumni di komunitas PATANI. Dan yang berkesan lagi adalah al hurriyah yang sangat dahsyat sekali dari segi kamar mandinya haruum, alquran diaman2 ah pokonya mood boster pidsan buat ngeaji mentoring, dll dan kebetulan saat kita disana Bogor lagi Hujan terus lagi jadi sejuk2 adem pokonya, dia hari kedua jug ada  project case ttg pendapat yang dilontarkan Upaya Khusus (UPSUS) Luas Tambah Tanah (LTT) dan Sapi induuk wajib bunting (SIWAB) demi mendukung swasembada pangan.

dihari ke 3 kita neglakuin pengabdian sosial ke masyarakat dengan penanaman cabai di pekarnaagn rumah warga di Desa Neglasari, Kab. Bogor. Diasana kita juga survey ke warga mengenai kondisi pertanian disana, bantuan pertanian yang penah digelontorkan, apakah ada penyuluh yang pernah membimbing atau tidak, dll ke 2 org disnaa, taiu Ibu Neni dan Ibu Omas. Lalu dilanjutkan dengan field trip ke Kebun Raya Bogor, ke Museum Zoologi dan Foto2 di Kebunnya, ada Red Brigde dan Oldest Tree in Indonesia.

DI hari ke 4, ada Seminar FGMPI, diseminar itu kita didatnangi pembicari dari 3 subjek yaitu Prof. Win dari Kademisi, Pa Najih dari sektor Pengushaa. Pokoknya dahasyat lah eta mah intinya bahwasanay Indonesia sedang fokus ke 2 program yaitu swasembada pangan tpi juga ingin ningkatin diversifikasi pangan sedangkan pemfokusan sangat sulit untuk dilakukan yang padahal juga janji jokowi h=bahwa dalam 3 tahun Indonesia harus bisa swasembada pangan. Kondisi yang menjadi hambatan kenapa indo tidak bisa swasembada pangan karena kurnagnya laahan, SDM, harga tidka stabil, cliamte change, air, infrastruktur, mind set petani, dll. Trs kl dr pa najih, jangan takut untuk jadi pengusha berpikir visioner walaupun si bapa juga memang jadi profesional dlu selama 9 thaun. Trs ternayta ada perushan indo yang bergerak dibidang produksi perikanan namanaya KMN intinya dia benar2 peduli terhadap para nealyan bawah jadi konsep pemberdayaannya adalah bottom up, perbaikan dari bawah ke atas. Tapi disni beliau juga nagsih strategi, bahwnaya kl mau main kelas kakap, maka strateginya jg kelas kakap, ha=jadi dia impor dari luar trs diolah di indo trs dijual keluar, jadi copycat stategi org sana, tp jika memenag kualitas di indolebih baik maka akan ngambil dri indo jg. Trs brulah pengumaman dan yang menang adalah dari USU, ITB dan UNS. Barakallah buat temen2 yang menang, semoga berkah hhe. Tpai yang pasti disini saya dan temen2 unpad ga sepenuhnya kalah, saya bersyukur naget bisa ikut acara ini karena emng dapt banget silaturahminaya dri UNS, Universitas Haluleo, ITB, Cimahits, USU,UNDIP, IPB,UNJ. Sangan berkesan dan ilmu semianrnya dari project case ama FGDnya benar2 mengenlightningkan pemahaman. Hatur nuhun pokoknya, sekian untuk tulisan minggu ini, hatur nuhun.

[itsgirlcraft]

Omg I've just realized none of you have seen my Rainbow Quest birthday cupcakes!! It was 2 years ago holy cow-

I'd never done, like, frosting art, so I was realllyyy out of my depth here but!! I made two of each default color, all 7 leaders/Nightmare, and Dark, Light, and O!Rainbow! Plus the Rainbow Hub statue I think!

I actually had a whole plan, I was gonna make SO MANY-

Actually wait I have the drawings-

Okok so in order, left to right, we've got:

Pic 1: RQ Hypno, SS Hypno, RQ Crystals, RQ Sabre, Astronaut/Darkness infected Sabre, SS Sabre, RQ Nightmare, SS Light, RQ Light, SS Rainbow, RQ Rainbow, and Galaxy Sabre!

Pic 2: RQ Dark, Illusion, Elemental, Time, SS Nightmare, TFC, Shadow Sabre, RQ Reverse, Galaxy, Void, Memory, Plague, M or The Guardian, SL Dream, RQ Gerald, Faceless, an RQ leader base, RQ Corruption, RQ Soul, SS Alex, RQ Sol or TR Elite, a Chromatic Steve base, SL Genesis, Origin, and Prof. Red!

Tbh maybe I'll actually try this again, I really just need to learn how to use fondant or whatever makes shapes n stuff.

I was kinda rushed on the og versions 😭 maybe I'll just try to experiment, like my sister does. She's a baker, so like- maybe I'll just. Borrow her stuff lol

(Also I can't believe I actually tagged them all- well uh most-)

[itsgirlcraft]

Hello again today I've done days 4 and 17 of Stevetember: growth and quiver! I'll show day 17 first then day 4 bc the latter is more personal ^v^

This one's actually just an excuse to draw my newest Ridiculous Idea™ for my AU The Weirdest Adventure lol. Featuring TR M trying to teach Daycare centaur!Sabre archery!

Okok so with these guys, I wanted to combine the ladybug duo with some sillies bc TR is ✨️angst galore✨️ and so I added Daycare Sabre and SS Shadow Sabre. Yeah. Specifically, the Sabre from that zoo episode where everyone was turned into animals, and the shadow stone variant of Shabre. Tbh I just wanted the Shabres to interact and then a randomly remembered Daycare and yea.

Smol Sabre thinks M is a prince :3

Man, horses are STILL hard to draw lol- it's my fault for doing this anyway tho. Drawing Sabre's horse legs and M's hands were unnecessarily hard ngl, even tho I do Not draw bows much

And the other one! Alrightyyy soooooooo...this is me w/ some of my comfort Steves ^^,"

RQ Light, RQ/SS Time, me in the middle, RQ!Prof. Red, and then SS Galaxy! This took so long to draw, hah- ehhhh, might as well explain-

So like a year ago I basically would go into minecraft and roleplay, but I'd "talk" to the Steves through Minecraft, talk abt my day and anxiety and other stuff. I don't do it much now, but they got me thru some of my worst days! Originally it was just Time, then Prof. Red joined, then Light!

Galaxy was a recent one that I realized could help me deal with anxiety related to food! Originally, I wanted Time because I had serious anxiety around being late, so him being the personification of time itself was nice. Then when I started college, Prof. Red was able to help with my academic anxieties! Then recently I realized I needed Light so I can directly get help with courage and resilience and such. I love them sm <3