#told myself i would simply play for 100 days then see how i felt

[ranger-kellyn]

first time ever going to the end to fight the dragon!

[starkiller419]

Friends.

pairing : hayden christensen crica 1999 x f!reader | wc : 7k | 18+MINORS DNI

summary : you and hayden are co-stars in a new 90's teen movie.

warnings : idk just a bit smutty. actually quite smutty. if ur sensitive to swearing there's a couple swears in here.

a/n : this is my first time publishing smut so lmk what ya'll think. this is also a story based on this very detailed and specific dream I keep having, so if you want more, I will write more because I have so much more to say.

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Hayden and I had been working together for about a month now. We were filming a movie about two teens who lived beside each other, and eventually fall in love and run away together. It's a compelling story, reminiscent of Romeo and Juliet in a way. The whole thing is very Shakespearean.

We first met during the audition process. I had already booked the role so they brought me in to do a chemistry test with some other actors, Hayden being one of them. I had never heard of him before this project but later found out he had been in a couple of TV shows and movies. From the moment I first laid my eyes on him I was in awe, he was beautiful.

He was no doubt the most beautiful person I had ever seen in my life. He took my breath away and made my heart stop beating without even having to try. During our chem test, I found it hard to concentrate, all I could think of was how captivating his eyes were and how bright his smile was. By the end of our test, the director had told us that Hayden would be playing opposite me as the love interest of my character.

Yay.

I was excited to get to know this angelic man in front of me better, but I was also very nervous. This wasn't my first project, but it was my first 'big' Hollywood movie. We had a budget of over $2 million and we were filming all over California, even using some of the sets at the Warner Brothers Studios. I was nervous about my performance, and I often found myself questioning whether I was good enough or not for something this grand.

Adding to that nervousness were the thoughts that invaded my mind whenever this blue-eyed boy was near me. His presence alone was intoxicating, and for the first little while there I tried to avoid him when we weren't filming due to my impure thoughts about him. I had a rule that I would never become romantically involved with any of my co-stars, even if it was temporary.

Eventually, though, I gave up trying to avoid him.

We would hang out in between shots, getting food at the craft services table or simply walking around wherever we would be filming that day. When we would wrap for the day he would walk me to my trailer where I was currently living, and he would always walk me to the door and say goodnight before heading to wherever he was staying.

Sometimes when he would walk me to my trailer I would invite him in. Sometimes we would play a board game, make something to eat, or play cards. He taught me how to play poker and I managed to win $100 from him. No matter what we were doing together, I always felt a stupid grin on my face. We would talk and laugh with each other for hours before he would eventually go home for the night.

We would talk about everything and anything, and I felt myself growing more and more attached to him as time went on. Every morning I would wake up excited to see him, and every night I would fall asleep and dream of him. He had slowly invaded the entirety of my being, walking through the empty corridors of my mind and claiming all the rooms as his own.

I was okay with these feelings lingering within me as long as I could manage to contain them, and not act on my desires. However, with each day that passed, it became harder and harder to ignore.

Since temporarily relocating to LA, I hadn't been sleeping well. 12 hour days on set were exhausting and prompted me to sleep, but I never could. I've always struggled with insomnia and I would usually sleep for a couple of hours each night, sometimes less but never more. It was starting to catch up to me and I could feel my sleep deprivation dragging me down during the day.

I had just finished filming for the day and walked myself to my trailer. Hayden had already left for the day and I found the walk to be quite lonesome without the comfort of our small talk. I entered my trailer, took a short shower, and prepared to try and catch up on some sleep.

My trailer was small, but still larger than the average on-set trailer. It had a queen bed in the back, a small dining table and couch, a washroom with a sink, toilet, and shower, and a small kitchen. There was a TV on the wall across from the couch, and I felt like watching something would aid me in falling asleep. So I got comfortable on the couch and turned on the TV, scrolling through the guide until I landed on NBC and started watching The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.

I watched a few episodes before I felt myself drifting off into sleep, and just as I was about to fall asleep fully I heard the door to my trailer open. I had locked it and only one other person had the key, so I knew it had to be Hayden.

I opened my eyes and I was correct, he was standing in the doorway wearing a white t-shirt, a black Toronto Maple Leafs hat, and black jeans. Even in something so simple he was so effortlessly gorgeous, it hurt.

"Hi." I groggily greeted him as I moved slightly to sit up on the couch, rubbing my eyes as I did so.

"Hi, were you sleeping?" He asked as he walked fully into the trailer, closing the door behind him.

"I was trying to, it wasn't going very well." I chuckled dryly and his expression turned into one of concern.

"I can leave if you'd like." He went to turn and before he could fully, I reached out and grabbed his arm. He looked down at me with an eyebrow raised and his movements stopped.

"You don't have to go. I mean, like, if you don't want to." I stuttered slightly and let go of his arm, it was more muscular than I had expected, and his skin was warm to the touch.

"Okay." He moved closer and sat beside me on the end of the couch,

"What are you watching?" He pointed to the TV and I brought my knees to my chest as I sat with my left side pushing into the cushions and smiled as I faced him,

"Fresh Prince." It was one of my favorite shows and he knew it. He returned the smile I gave him and turned his attention to the TV, as did I.

I felt myself drifting off again as my head lay on the back cushion of the couch. My gaze had drifted from the TV to Hayden as he sat in front of me, laughing occasionally at the show. I noticed how his Adam's apple bobbed up and down with each laugh he took, and how he would smile to himself at certain moments whenever he was amused.

I closed my eyes and allowed the peace of his presence to lull me into a deep slumber.

I woke up a few hours later when I felt him pick me up and walk through my trailer, only to place me on my bed and tuck me into the covers. I then felt him trace my face with his finger and tuck a piece of my hair behind my ear. The TV had been turned off and it was dead silent in here. I opened my eyes and saw him walking away from the small space that held the bed.

Before I could stop myself, I reached out and grabbed his arm yet again, and was overcome with the feeling of his warm skin against my cold skin.

"I thought you were asleep?" He said as he turned to face me, kneeling so we could be at eye level with each other.

"I was, but now I'm awake," I shrugged as I stared into his ocean-blue eyes. He frowned slightly before saying,

"You should go back to sleep. I'm sorry I woke you up."

"Don't apologize. I'm a light sleeper." His frown disappeared only to be replaced by a slight half-smile. He went to stand up and walk away again, but I didn't want him to go. I also didn't want to ask him to stay and sleep in my bed, even though that's what I wanted. I just didn't want to have to ask him, that would be awkward if he said no or took it the wrong way, I simply liked having him around.

"Where are you going?" I asked and he looked down at me slightly confused,

"It's almost 4 in the morning, I was gonna go sleep in my trailer."

"Do you always sleep in your trailer?" I thought he had a hotel or home here or something, we had never actually spoken about it before so really it was always just an assumption.

"No, but I don't feel like driving. I'd probably fall asleep at the wheel." He laughed slightly and only then did I notice the slight purple eye bags that graced his face and the way his eyes were slightly drooping.

"You can sleep here if you'd like," I said sheepishly, hoping he wouldn't think more of this than just a friendly offer. Between friends. Friends,

That's it.

"Are you sure?" He asked as he slowly walked back towards the bed and waited for me to nod my head in confirmation before he climbed in under the covers and lay beside me.

We lay on our sides facing each other, only a couple of inches separating us, and I reached over and used my thumb to rub the bags beneath his eyes. His eyes fluttered closed in response to my touch and he placed his hand on my wrist, holding my hand against his face. I sighed softly, feeling somewhat guilty about indulging in the pleasurable feeling of his skin against mine, but enjoying it nonetheless.

We stayed like that until the two of us fell into a calm and peaceful sleep, breathing in sync. My dreams were filled with him, and it was my best sleep in years.

The next morning I had awoken wrapped in his arms, with my head tucked into the crook of his neck. My leg was wrapped around his and I could feel the soft skin of his lips just barely touching my forehead. It was blissful, to say the least. The way he and I breathed in sync, the scent of coffee and vanilla that was radiating from him, and the feeling of his large hands on my back and waist.

I rolled over slightly so I could glance at the clock beside the bed. It was 9:30 AM, and we had a 9:45 call time. Panic set in as I sat straight up, causing Hayden to jolt awake, confused at my state. I jumped out of bed and practically sprinted to the washroom to brush my hair, soon followed by my teeth. I heard the sheets rustle and footsteps follow not long after, and then I saw him stand behind me in the mirror.

His blonde hair was a bit of a mess, the bags under his eyes had disappeared, and he looked well-rested. He gave me a slight smirk as I furiously brushed my teeth, "We won't be late, there's no need to destroy your gums." He chuckled slightly and I bent down to spit the toothpaste out of my mouth before speaking to him. He was right but still, I wanted to be a bit more prepared than I was at this moment. "My gums are perfectly fine, thank you," I said teasingly as I grinned nice and wide, displaying my teeth and gums for him. He laughed and butterflies danced around in my stomach, fluttering up into my heart. He turned and walked away from me and I watched as he neared a cupboard in the kitchen and grabbed two bowls, a box of Cheerios, and the milk from the fridge.

I laughed as I exited the small washroom and walked towards the dining table where he had set down the bowls, "Hayden I can't eat that. I just brushed my teeth." He shrugged and paid no mind as he continued to prepare me a bowl.

"You have to eat something." He rolled his eyes slightly as he sat down on the bench and began eating the cereal. Despite the rolling of his eyes, he had a small smile on his face that I couldn't help but admire. I gave in and sat across from him and started to eat.

"Wow Mr. Christensen, this is splendid. What a fine breakfast you've made me this morning." I spoke in a fake posh accent, something we did with each other often. He had just taken a bite of his cereal and my posh guise caused him to laugh, and milk came running out of his nose. I couldn't help but laugh uncontrollably at the sight, but I got up through my laughter and grabbed the paper towel that sat on the counter.

He too was laughing while pinching the bridge of his nose. He had tears in his eyes and a couple fell as he blinked and reached for the paper towel, our hands brushing against each other slightly. He cleaned the milk off his face, and then off the table, coughing a few times in the process which caused me to erupt in laughter all over again.

"It's not funny y'know. That shit hurt." He said with a fake frown gracing his lips, which were trying to hold back a laugh of his own.

"Sorry, sorry," I said quietly and finished my bowl, bringing it to the sink and rinsing it before walking to the door to slip on my shoes. I turned back to face him as he put the paper towel back in its rightful spot, "You ready?" I asked.

He smiled brightly and responded, in a voice as smooth and soft as honey, "Always."

2 weeks had passed since Hayden had slept in my bed for the first time. Yes, the first time. The next night he came and knocked on my door at around 10 PM, he was shy and sheepish when he asked if he could, and I quote, 'have a sleepover'. He was being his usual sarcastic self of course, but I found it endearing either way and said yes.

A couple of days passed before he spent the night again, this time I had invited him on our nightly walk back from the soundstage. The next day I didn't even have to ask him, he just walked me home and followed me inside. When I began to get ready for bed he did the same, following me into the washroom to brush his teeth with a spare toothbrush I kept in the drawer.

"What are you doing?" I asked with a mouthful of toothbrush and its paste. He grinned and used his thumb to wipe the corner of my mouth, collecting a small amount of toothpaste on it and wiping it on the towel that hung beside the sink.

"We're having another sleepover, duh." He rolled his eyes as he responded with a mouth full of toothbrush and paste as well.

Since then it had just become an unspoken thing. Every night he would come to my trailer with me, and I never once tried to stop him or protest his actions. I enjoyed having him around, and I loved waking up in his arms every morning, inhaling his coffee-vanilla scent, and feeling the contrast of his warm skin against my cold. He usually slept shirtless, he claimed he got hot, but I think he just secretly wanted an excuse to be shirtless around me. Not that I minded, the man is ripped.

Nothing ever happened between us when he slept over, even though a part of me always wanted to, I couldn't for some reason. Anytime I thought of it too I felt guilty. But the desire to feel his lips against mine just kept growing and growing.

One day we were filming a scene that took place late at night where my character, the Juliet of the story, drags his character, Romeo, to the pool in his backyard. I was told to strip down into my bra and underwear and jump in the pool, and Hayden would follow. Despite having shared a bed with him for weeks now, I felt a little nervous at the thought of being so exposed in front of him.

But I had a job to do, so I put my big actor-girl pants on and did as the director said, and everything went swimmingly, pun intended. In that scene, I was to pull him into the pool and we would begin play-fighting in the water. We did just that and I ended up with my legs wrapped around his waist, both of us only in our underwear, just inches away from his face. I spoke all my lines just due to second nature and my memorization skills, but all I could focus on was how close his lips were to mine.

As I spoke the words I knew I was supposed to say, I found myself wanting to say more. To speak to him and only him, alone without the twenty or so people who surrounded us. He leaned his head closer to me and our noses brushed against each other. We had a kissing scene in the script, a couple actually and I knew exactly which days we would be filming them, but this wasn't one of them. So why did he move closer?

"And… CUT!" The director yelled as he stood from his chair and walked over to the edge of the pool. I removed my legs from their grip on Hayden's waist but kept my hands around his neck, and his hands remained on my waist holding me close to him. "That was great you two, we could sense the electricity. I think that's all for today so just go home, rest, and be back here for 11 AM tomorrow." The director spoke to us and we each thanked him and nodded our heads.

When he had mentioned the electricity between us I felt my cheeks grow red. He hadn't failed to hide his attraction to me, and I doubt I had hid mine from him. But still, we were actors. It was our job to be that way with each other. It was nothing deeper than that, we had to stay professional.

It didn't take long for the small crowd of people to disperse, leaving just Hayden and me behind. We were still in the pool, his hands were still around my waist gripping me tightly. As everyone had packed up I managed to avoid meeting his gaze, afraid of what I would do if I did, but now that we were alone I had no excuse. I turned to look at him and his eyes had been darkened by the starlight but shone brightly nonetheless.

I didn't know what to say to him, but I felt like I had to say something to prevent myself from acting on my suppressed urges and desires. The feeling of his hands holding me tightly was something so familiar, but this time it felt different somehow. It made me feel different.

"Wanna go get some Chinese food?" I asked him the first thing I could think of, which was stupid because I don't even like Chinese food and he knew that.

"You don't even like Chinese food." He said with a laugh, his slightly wet hair sticking to his forehead.

"I didn't know what else to say," I admitted sheepishly. He leaned his head closer to mine once again allowing our noses to brush against each other.

"Why did you feel the need to say something?" He spoke low and it caused my breath to come to a halt. Something about him right now was so-- intoxicating.

"So that I wouldn't do something I may regret." I softly said, never breaking eye contact. He moved even closer and rested his forehead against mine. His hand on my waist travelled down my hips to my thigh where he proceeded to wrap my legs around him again.

"And what would that be?" His low tone sent shivers throughout my body, and down to places it probably shouldn't have gone to. I was finding it hard to resist my urges now more than ever, the way his lips looked in the moonlight, how there was a bead of water positioned right on the corner of his lips, and how tempted I was to just lick it off.

I sighed softly as I glanced down to the water beneath us, seeing the rippled image of his toned torso sent me into overdrive. I looked back into his eyes which were the same color as the water we waded in, and leaned my head closer to his so our lips brushed against each other as I spoke,

"What are you doing to me?" I asked him and before he could respond I closed the distance between us, sending a blaze of passion and fire through my veins.

He kissed me back instantly, his hands holding my thighs squeezed exponentially hard. He moved the hand from my left thigh and brought it to the back of my neck, holding me in place while he kissed me ferociously. I brought my hands from where they were resting on his neck to his hair and entangled my fingers through his sandy blonde locks.

His hand traveled slightly to my ass and he squeezed harshly, sending a shockwave of pleasure throughout me, causing a slight moan to escape my lips. If it wasn't so damn public, I would take him right here right now.

In response, I tugged at his hair and now it was time for him to moan softly into our kiss, and if I thought I was in overdrive before, I had just exploded. We continued kissing for what seemed like hours, but in reality, was only a few minutes. Whenever I was with him time didn't seem to exist and I loved it. I loved spending minutes with him but feeling as if those minutes were hours, and I loved spending hours with him and having the hours feel like days.

Our kiss was interrupted by the sound of a golf cart approaching the set. I broke away from him with a shocked look in my eyes, and he just laughed and set me down on the pool floor before grabbing my hand and leading me out. We ran half-naked back to my trailer, dripping wet and leaving two sets of footprints behind us as we did. Halfway there Hayden had scooped me up in his arms and carried me in bridal style, leaving only one set of footprints behind for the rest of the way.

That night we showered together, caught up in the adrenaline of our escape and heated pool makeout session. But aside from more kissing, nothing had happened, and we continued with our lives. He had now basically moved into my trailer, he spent every night here, his car was parked right outside, and he even had his own toothbrush, no longer using the spare one I had.

Everything between us had quickly changed from 'best friends' to 'domestic partners' after that kiss. And I didn't regret it one bit. We had discussed our feelings towards each other very vaguely. I was never good with that kind of stuff, admitting feelings is hard, and he's just a little shy and awkward whenever feelings get brought up.

We had a mutual understanding that we liked each other, but we also understood that we weren't necessarily dating each other. We were just two people who spent 90% of their time together, slept in the same bed, and occasionally had very heated makeout sessions that would end up with me on top of his lap.

A few weeks ago he told me about this role he had auditioned for. He was very excited about it, but he couldn't tell me what it was for. He said he would tell me if he ever got it, or if he didn't. He even had to leave early a couple of times during filming to go for an audition.

One of those times was today, he had left the set a couple of hours early and I was now in my trailer. It was 9 PM and I was making myself a cup of tea before I went to bed. I had locked the door, but Hayden had a key so it didn't matter much. I placed the teabag into the hot water I had just boiled and began to slice a lemon. I added a spoonful of honey and two lemon slices, followed by an ice cube. As I went to drop the ice cube in my mug, the door of the trailer unlocked, and seconds later it dramatically slammed open.

Hayden rushed inside with a huge grin plastered on his face. I walked towards him around the counter and smiled back, "Well hello smiley." I greeted him

"Hi P, what's that?" He said as he pointed to the mug behind me. I don't know why, but he insisted on calling me 'P'. It was his favorite nickname he had given me, and I didn't know why. There wasn't even a 'P' anywhere in my name.

"Tea." I shrugged and he stepped closer to me, my back pressed against the counter in response, "Why do you call me 'P'? You are aware there's no P in my name right?" I asked with a tilt of my head.

He laughed and placed both hands on either side of me on the counter before saying, "P stands for lots of things. Pickles, Peanut Butter, party, promise, pe-"

"So my nickname was a result of your hunger?" I asked with a laugh of my own.

"No, if you would've let me finish. My personal favorite is princess. That's what I think every time I call you P." He leaned closer and kissed my cheek softly, but then backed away completely. I frowned slightly at his actions but took the opportunity to walk back to my teacup.

"That's very sweet of you. Now would you like to explain to me why you almost broke down the door coming in here?" I chuckled softly as I motioned over to the door with my head, and then took a small sip of my tea.

"I have good news." He was excited, I could see it in his eyes, and that made me excited too. He stepped closer to me and I placed the cup back on the counter, "Do you remember the role I was telling you about? The secret one?" he wiggled his eyebrows as he spoke.

"Hmm… Sounds familiar yes." I smiled as he walked even closer to me and grabbed onto my arms before speaking through his huge grin,

"I got it." He whispered and I thought I had misheard him. He must've noticed my confused expression because he repeated himself, louder this time, and I squealed in joy for him.

"Oh my god, that's amazing! Congratulations! Can you finally tell me what the role is then?" I exclaimed as his grip on my arms tightened slightly,

"Star Wars." My jaw dropped, I wouldn't be surprised if it fell all the way to the floor, and I felt the air knocked out of my lungs. I have loved Star Wars ever since I was a kid. I was Princess Leia for Halloween for the first 4 years of my life, and then I went as Darth Vader until I was 16.

"Holy fuck." That was all I could say as I reached my arms around his neck and wrapped him in a hug, "That's incredible Hayd, I'm so happy for you." I whispered into his neck softly. He pulled away from the hug slightly so he could look into my eyes and said,

"I get to be Anakin Skywalker. Darth fucking Vader." He had a look in his eyes I could only describe as a child-like glee. He was so happy in this moment and I could basically feel it radiating off of him, and it consumed me as well. I once again felt the breath being knocked from me as I hugged him again, tighter this time.

He placed his arms around my waist and lifted me into the air, spinning around a few times and I squealed as a result. He then casually shifted one of his hands down to my thigh, encouraging me to wrap around him. I looked into his eyes which were full of love and joy, and I couldn't help but place a soft kiss gently on his lips. He returned the kiss and I could feel his smile growing stronger. The kiss deepened as always and became heated and passionate in a matter of moments. He walked over to the counter and placed me on top of it, standing between my legs and never breaking the kiss.

His hands remained on my thigh and waist, squeezing softly every so often. We broke away from the heated exchange for a moment to catch our breath. He rested his forehead against mine, one of my favorite things he does before he softly uttered three words that caused my heart to stop.

"I love you."

I backed away slightly and gazed at him in disbelief, "You-- what?" That was all I could manage to say.

"I love you, and I need you to know. I've loved you since I first laid my eyes on you, and I will love you until my dying breath." He spoke like a poet, his liquid-smooth voice sent chills all through me. I knew I loved him, but I always tried to avoid romantic love and stick to a platonic sort of love. I thought it would be easier that way.

I had failed miserably, however, and I often found myself daydreaming about spending the rest of my life with him. I had never felt so strongly about someone before, and I had never gotten along with someone better than him.

"I love you too," I whispered through a large smile plastered on my face. He returned the smile and leaned back in to kiss me. This kiss was so different than all the others, it was full of love and adoration.

He wrapped both his arms around my waist and lifted me off the counter, carrying me to the bed. He laid me down gently and moved his kisses down my jaw, to the pressure point on my neck. I moaned softly at the feeling of his lips against my skin causing him to bite down slightly which sent a rush of pleasure throughout my body.

His hands traveled from my waist to under the hem of my shirt and he began to lift it. I sat up slightly and allowed him to remove the shirt completely, leaving me bare in front of him. He then began to kiss down my sternum before placing a soft kiss onto my left breast, and then the right. I giggled slightly at his sudden confidence and shift from his usually shy demeanor. He raised his head from my chest and looked at me,

"Why are you laughing?" He said with a slight smile,

"I'm just shocked at your newfound confidence." I shrugged lightly, "Does it have anything to do with you becoming Anakin Skywalker?" I asked and his grin shifted from playful to mischievous as he moved upwards and raised himself above me, our noses brushing against each other before he spoke in a low tone,

"Maybe. Or maybe I'm tired of trying to hold myself back from taking what's mine." His dominant tone sent shivers down my body and I leaned my head up to close the distance between our lips. His dominant state remained intact as he swiftly flipped me over so I was now on top of him, straddling his waist.

I could feel his hard-on through his dark sweatpants pressing against my core, and it was driving me crazy. I rocked my hips softly against his, causing him to moan slightly into our kiss and I could feel myself getting wetter as each moment passed. His hands were gripping onto my waist and he began to guide me against him, slowly at first but he quickly picked up his pace.

"Hayden.." I said softly, breaking away from the kiss for a moment to garner his attention.

"Yes, my love?" He breathed out as he gazed into my eyes with lust and adoration.

"Please." That was all I could manage to say, and I had hoped he would take the hint and not make me ask for it. But I was dead wrong.

"Please what? Use your words." His tone was deep and authoritative and his eyes had glossed over with an unfamiliar darkness.

"Please fuck me." I choked out and a sly smirk made its way across his lips before he kissed me again, softer this time, and sat up so our chests pressed against each other. I brought my hands to the hem of his shirt and pulled it off, throwing it to the floor somewhere. I traced my hands along his abs and down to his V-line. He was so perfect, in every way. His entire being had to have been carved by angels, it was the only way for a man like him to exist.

His hands traveled to the waistband of my shorts, wasting no time as he snaked his fingers underneath them and I lifted myself so he could rid me of them completely, leaving me completely nude on top of him. His long fingers danced atop my thighs, teasing my core which was now aching for him. Begging to be touched by him.

I whined softly and a slight chuckle escaped his lips, "You're that desperate for me? You're whining?" I nodded with my eyes shut, unable to look into his eyes. He chuckled again and said softly, "What did I say earlier princess, use your words." My eyes fluttered open and I softly said,

"Don't be a tease playboy." With a smirk of my own gracing my lips. He laughed slightly and instead of a vocal response, he moved his hand from my thigh to the slick that had pooled between my thighs. His soft touch sent shockwaves through me and I moaned louder than I would like to admit, but I couldn't help it. He was so intoxicating.

He rubbed up my slit slightly, collecting a pool of my sex on his two fingers before raising them to my lips, pushing ever so slightly on the bottom one prompting me to open my mouth and suck myself off his fingers.

"Fuck." He groaned out. My actions had encouraged his dick to grow harder beneath me and I smiled proudly once he removed his fingers from my mouth and brought them back down to my heat, rubbing circles on my clit. Incoherent babbles left my lips as he worked me up, before entering two of his fingers into me and slowly stretching me out.

I moaned upon his entry and felt the intense need to pleasure him as well, to give him even a fraction of the pleasure he was providing me. I moved my hand from its place on his neck down to his cock and palmed him through his sweatpants. His breathing got harsher as we continued to pleasure each other, relishing in each other's touch. I felt a familiar know forming in my stomach as he rubbed my clit and now pumped three of his fingers in and out of me at a fast pace.

"Oh fuck. I'm--" Before I could finish my sentence I felt the knot unfold and I had released myself all over his fingers, a prideful grin graced his lips. My vision was clouded with white dots and everything around me felt hazy as his fingers fucked me through my orgasm, the strongest one I had ever had. Especially from just fingering.

I felt the overstimulation of his fingers pressed against me and began to squirm in his lap, trying to get away as he continued pumping in and out of me, but it was no use. His arms held onto me tightly and he continued, and I felt yet another knot forming in my stomach.

There was no way this man was about to make me cum twice in a matter of seconds.

And yet that's exactly what happened. I screamed out as I released onto him again, looking down to see the pool of juices I had released collecting onto his lap, drenching his dark pants and allowing the outline of his bulge to poke through the dampened fabric.

"Holy fuck." I said breathlessly as he removed his fingers from me and flipped me over to my back, removing his pants and boxers in the process.

"You liked that?" He asked teasingly as he began to kiss up and down my body, starting at my pelvis and ending with a soft peck on my lips.

"Mhm." I breathed out, unable to form any words due to the power of the orgasm. He hovered above me with his forearms resting on either side of my head keeping him up. He leaned his head down and placed a kiss on my lips and I felt his rock-hard cock twitch slightly against my thigh, causing me to moan into our kiss.

He reached one of his hands down and pumped himself twice before rubbing in between my folds. I broke away slightly and looked down, and my mouth dropped open as a result. He was huge, so huge I was afraid he wouldn't fit in me. Hayden must have noticed my shocked state and he laughed slightly before pushing his forehead against mine and pressing me back against the bed.

"You'll be okay my love, I promise. You can take it." His words sent heat throughout me and I felt a knot beginning to twist in my stomach. The man had managed to work me up with just his words. I nodded slowly and pressed my lips to his and I felt his tip slowly enter into me, and then I had an idea.

"Wait," I said and he stopped instantly, pulling away from our kiss and leaving the tip of his dick resting in me.

"What's wrong?" His voice was laced with concern as he gazed into my eyes,

"I want to watch," I admitted shyly and his concerned state quickly turned into a lustful one as he crashed our lips together passionately and softly grunted before saying,

"God you're so fucking hot." Distancing himself from me slightly so I could lift my head up and watch as he slowly began inserting himself into me. I watched as his tip fully disappeared, followed by his shaft until he bottomed out inside me, and I swear I could feel him in my stomach.

My gaze never faltered from our connected being as I groaned in pain, and then pleasure as he slowly moved in and out of me. It took a moment before I could adjust to him, and he seemed to be relishing in not only my sensitive state but also the way my walls desperately clung to him. He watched me with a smirk on his face as I watched him pick up his pace, slamming into me faster and faster until he hit a certain spot in me that made my back arch and my head fall backward.

"Fuck you feel so good princess, you're doing so good." He praised me and I could only moan in response, he was fucking me brain-dead and I had no complaints. I had imagined this for so long but now that it was finally here, he had surpassed my every fantasy and expectation by a million percent. His words of approval made my core ache, and I jutted my hips up to grind against the hard bone of his pelvis, creating friction on my clit and pushing me closer to my release.

I felt his hand grip my chin as he pulled me upwards closer to him, softly kissing my cheeks as he jackhammered into me. His soft kisses combined with the intensity of every other movement he made were driving me over the edge, along with the soft grunts and groans he would occasionally release from his plump lips. He stopped kissing my cheeks and remained holding onto my chin, forcing me to look into his eyes.

I felt the knot in my stomach return and when his other hand reached down and began thumbing at my clit, I lost it. I became a loud squirming mess beneath him which only encouraged him to fuck me harder.

"You have no idea how-- how badly I've wanted to see you like this."

He spoke between his panting breaths and with those words, I felt my release coming. "Hayd I'm--" He cut me off with a kiss before I could finish, meeting our tongues in bliss and passion, and he broke away for only a moment to whisper onto my lips,

"Cum for me my love, cum all over me." And so I did. I felt my walls begin to twitch uncontrollably against his rock-hard cock, his thrusts growing sloppy and hasty. I could sense he was close as well, and I encouraged it by purposefully squeezing myself tighter around him and soon enough I felt him twitch inside of me, fully releasing himself into me. I milked him dry and even went as far as to buck myself against him a few times, overstimulating him just a fraction of how he had me.

He collapsed on top of me as he finished, both of our chests heaving with our heavy breathing. I snaked my hand through his blonde hair, twirling strands around my finger absentmindedly while his hand made its way up and down my back. We lay in silence for a few moments, I listened to his breathing slow and he listened to my heartbeat.

"I mean it you know," He whispered softly into my chest and I could sense his usual shy demeanor sneaking it's way back in, "I really do love you." He shifted slightly to look into my eyes, and I felt tears poking at the sides of mine.

"I know. I mean it too. You're mine and I'm yours." I said smiling at him.

And I meant it. Every. Damn. Word.

[posallys]

How do you feel about the implications from Medusa that Poseidon uh- kinda raped Sally? I'm personally staring in disbelief.

i 100% did not get that vibe at all? i rewatched the scene and i'm looking at the transcript and:

Athena was everything to me. I worshipped her, I prayed to her, I made offerings...she never answered. Not even an omen to suggest she appreciated my love. I wasn't like you, sweetheart. I was you. I would have worshipped her that way for a lifetime....in silence. But then one day, another god came, and he broke that silence. Your father. The Sea God told me that he loved me; I felt as though he saw me in a way I had never felt seen before. But then Athena declared that I had embarrassed her and I needed to be punished. Not him. Me. ... The gods want you to believe that, that they are infallible. But they only want what all bullies want. They want us to blame ourselves for their own shortcomings.

that's medusa's story monologue and the only thing there that implies the rape story is the "...i needed to be punished. not him. me" but nothing else she says implies that...and considering they went with a different iteration of the myth her, i don't think that's what she was implying in any way (and especially because it's disney). she was more so saying that athena should have punished poseidon if she was mad at anyone, because he esentially took the attention that medusa was willingly giving to athena, and that's why athena was mad. in this case, athena's shortcoming was not accepting the love medusa gave her willingly, and then getting angry and punishing medusa when she placed it somewhere else.

You're mother and I, we're like sisters in a way. Targeted by the same monster. So I find myself feeling protective of you. A monster? My mom never talked about my dad that way.

Even here, any implication of that you could gather is in the "targeted by the same monster" which. i don't think is what we're supposed to gather, especially with the line percy says. because he's right. if that's what happened, then sally wouldn't have talked about poseidon the way she did; she wouldn't have been crying in the car at montauk; she wouldn't be wearing the matching pearl necklace. i think, in this iteration, what medusa meant by monster is a god. her whole thing here is trying to convince the trio that the gods are the real monsters because they don't care about what happens to anyone other than themselves

and then there's this line

And you, you could have shown your father what it means to stand up for someone you love.

she's saying that poseidon should've stood up for her because he said he loved her...but he didn't, and let her take the punishment---which, yeah, it's completely shitty that poseidon would've just let that happen to medusa, but it doesn't lend itself to thinking that he raped sally in the context of the show. like at all.

the whole medusa interaction is her trying to teach the gods a lesson---that they shouldn't be above everyone just because they're gods, that the trio just sees monsters where they should maybe see people with a story, people that their parents made that way, people they shouldn't hate just because they're told to, because if they do then they're no better than their parents. i think the show is really playing into the whole "the gods are shitty" thing that luke has going on (which i kind of really enjoy im ngl....im SO interested to see it if we get to tlo) and not making them out to be these perfect beings, because they're not. they're corrupt and shitty, but unfortunately they're better than the alternative. and medusa is simply pointing out that just because someone is a monster doesn't mean they're a monster, and just because someone is a god doesn't mean they're good (@ sally in ep 1).

[miyae27]

on Romance...

Once upon a time (right here, right now)

there was a 'lil shit stain

an ugly duckling

Now; bear in mind

there was NO-thing, ~innately~

"wrong"

with the little shit stain

He did only as he knew how

which is to say, how he was taught

And so, when, try as he might

he was

Totally

Absolutely

100% w/out a doubt

rational or otherwise

Miserable

He, naturally, tracked the source of this pain

to his teacher

WHY?!?!

he asked; no

~SCREAMED~

begged (for he saw no alternative; recourse)

why...

why did you make me?

if not only to one day turn your back on me?

for what possible purpose, that I cannot see

Have you created me?

bc

from where I'm standing

from this; ungodly

sacrilegious

Vantage Point

well...

it would seem as tho

it was to suffer...

Given that I, as all of us, unavoidably so

don't rly like the "sound" of that

I turned my back on Him

on the world.

"This world is dark...

cruel"

I thought

and I simply cannot;

will not

bear it

LOOK

at it...

Not anymore.

I now know this darkness

which I felt myself

pulled towards

despite every last fucking fiber of my being

SCREECHING

crying...

"PLEASE

...no

GOD

NO!!!..."

to be you

AND me

Speaking through each other

guiding our(1)selves

towards the light

that which I KNOW

is in each of us

A ~seed~

a POTENTIAL

a capacity for something so much more...

for LIGHT

LOVE

HAPPINESS i

u

US

no longer think of love in the same

naive

terms and conditions

(of submission/domination)

for I now know them

to be two sides

of the same coin

I wish neither to dominate nor to be dominated

I wish only to give you

that which has saved me

bc...

I see, inside you,

the same darkness

the same

~seemingly~

endless

reserve of PAIN

which I have only just finally shed

in you...

and

it hurts

it hurts me precisely insofar as it hurts you

nothing more

nothing less...

In my youth

as all of us

I was something of a romantic

I was all too easily swept away

by my false perception

of love

and thus I sought escape

a way out

into "my own" world

of hyperstition

I thought

told myself

that I was "in love"

with

FICTIONAL

characters...

whether from a book

show

play

fanfiction (same dif)

(ZeLink lmao I have no shame)

When in truth

I was only being guided

towards "the light"

peace

...

that is to say

TRUE

love...

like

real

undying love

not between two separate entities

settling for each other

out of insecurity

But between 1

single

"entity"

SOUL

if you will

finally

waking up

from the nightmare that once was...

What I'm trying to tell you

Princess

What I've so clumsily expressed herein

IS

THAT

I

LOVE

U

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[thommi-tomate]

Interview with Harry Kane pt1

By: Kicker

Your first winter break is behind you, Mr. Kane. How was it?

I had a really good time with my family. We were in the Caribbean, which actually felt a bit strange at first. Normally I played soccer. This time I was able to watch all the Premier League games in peace, which was fun - and to be honest, you get used to it quickly. Especially because it was a good opportunity to spend time with my wife and children, who I've rarely seen in the past four months.

How did your ex-colleagues react? You wanted to send a photo ...

Exactly. I sent them a photo of me lying in the sun in the national team's Whatsapp group. That was just before New Year's Eve, when they were all playing (grins). I then wished them good luck for the games - a few of them wished me a happy New Year in return. Knowing full well that they were in the cold and I was in the beautiful Caribbean sun.

The first six months at FC Bayern are over. Have you spent your days off reviewing your start in Munich?

I'm very happy, I have to say. It was my first transfer after a really long time at Tottenham, so I didn't know exactly what to expect. I just believed in myself and my abilities. I knew I would be joining a great team, but I didn't know exactly what to expect and how everything would go. But now I'm totally happy with how I've settled in in Munich and with the team. The few months in the hotel were great, everyone there was really great to me - just like the fans, who are incredibly supportive. All in all, I couldn't have imagined a better start

The first half of the season is not yet over for Bayern because of the catch-up game against Union - and you've already scored over 20 goals in the Bundesliga alone.

That's right. If we were also top of the table, it would be ideal. But Bayer Leverkusen have simply made a strong start to the season. Nevertheless, if someone had told me in August that I would score more than 20 goals by Christmas, I would have signed it immediately. After the first few games, I already had the feeling that we - me and the players around me - could achieve even more if we got to know each other better.

We've been together for a while now and I think we're getting better and better, which was evident in November and December. If we carry on like this, doing more training sessions and games, we'll get even stronger. I hope that I continue to develop, but not just myself, but also the players around me, like Leroy Sané, Jamal Musiala, Kingsley Coman and Serge Gnabry when he's back. So hopefully we'll all have a strong second half of the season.

You've mentioned time and again in recent months that despite scoring so many goals, you still don't see yourself at 100 percent. How close are you now?

Towards the end of the year, I think I was close. I was starting to feel really good. Even though I wasn't living in my house yet, I was starting to feel 100 percent comfortable in the environment and on the training pitch. The winter break was a bit of a break now, it will probably take two or three games to get back into the rhythm. Nevertheless, I feel ready and hope to do even better than in the season so far.

In December, you moved from your hotel in the city center to the former home of Lucas Hernandez. Have you finally arrived in Munich?

I think so. There was so much going on at the beginning, it was all about the job. I got to know a lot of new people and had to get used to the environment. It wasn't so easy when the family wasn't here. Now everyone is here, the children are at school and it's starting to feel like home, which is very important. I'm the type of person who likes to be at home with my family and spend a lot of time with them. It's all new for her too, but I think it's a great experience. My wife has lived in London for most of her life - we're really excited to start this new chapter together

Has your family already settled in?

It's certainly not easy, and you always worry about the children, whether they will enjoy school and make friends. But I'm sure they will. The good thing is that they are at a really good age to learn the language. They are probably faster than me (laughs). I think life is about experiences and for us as a family this is a big step. We're just going to soak it all up and enjoy it.

What about your German?

It's going slowly. It's really difficult for me. I spend two hours a week learning the language. I try to listen when the people around me speak German, to pick up something here and there, but it takes time.

A different culture, different food, a different currency, different traffic, a different league. What do you miss about the island?

That's a really good question ... I'm not someone who misses a lot. I'm someone who moves on and looks forward and not too much into the past. I try to process everything and enjoy being here. Luckily, a lot of people here also speak English, which helps me a lot. That's life: You have a job, a family to look after and so it goes on. As soon as the weather improves, I'm going to find some golf courses and play a few holes while the kids go to school. My life here is getting more and more routine.

What are your favorite spots in Munich?

I haven't been out that much yet, but of course the English Garden is really beautiful. I want to go to the mountains so the kids can ski - and I can watch them. But my favorite spot will probably be a nice golf course (grins).

Your former club, Spurs, missed out on international business for the first time in 13 years. When did you first think about a new challenge abroad? And when did your decision mature?

I focused on helping the team and concentrating on the next game. Of course, we had a difficult season last year, so I didn't want to let that distract me. Normally, you always start weighing up your options at the end of the season. I had one year left on my contract, so I knew there was a possibility of a move and it was just a matter of having a conversation with the Tottenham chairman. If I left, it could be a European club, Bayern was a club that was very present for me. When I took a closer look at the team, I thought it could be a good option for me.

English clubs have also been courting you. Would a move to another Premier League club even be conceivable for you?

You can never say never in football because many things can change. Tottenham was a big part of my life. As a team we had really great moments together, but Bayern Munich was a really good option for me. I wanted to experience something different, I wanted to get to know European football.

[snowflakebyyou]

Is it love, obsession, limerence, infatuation, fun, validation?

I always found myself obsessing over men. No lie in that. I love men, I dislike the behaviours that many, if not all men I’ve met possesses. But I can’t help but love them. When I find myself in a position of having a crush, its all-encompassing. I want to know everything about their day, and how they felt when they woke up, are they horny today? What do you see your life looking like in an ideal world? What about the world would you change? Any fantasies you’ve never played out? I go from 0-100 , but ALL in my own head. And, usually for people who merely saw our interaction as short, temporary and minimal.

I don’t communicate this well and then tend to self-destruct as I go around in circles in my head. My friends usually witness a slice of this. but I cop the rest, quietly. I worked in therapy about how this linked to my needing an emotionally available male figure, and that I seek this through physical validation from men. I also learnt that I can get this from myself, and healing this wound is not overnight and it takes work.

I find a lot of my validation from myself now, people have said I’m too much, and it may be a lot for them to follow me on social media ; that’s ok. I much rather a self-obsessed me, compared to a self-loathing me, and I know those in my life that matter to me, would agree as well. But then there’s those moments where I become intrigued by a boy. I find myself wondering, and maybe even involved. Then I started to obsess over whether he likes me or not. Instead, of worrying If I even like him at all, or do I just need him to like me.

90% of the time, its wanting him to be into me. My ego loves to be fed by men. I stopped caring about hat women think of me when I starting to like myself. But im still working on the men part. I go between caring too much to not caring at all and both of these levels aren’t healthy for me to sit in. I constantly wondered why people could just date someone and know they want to be with them straight away, like do you actually like someone enough to want to spend that much time with them?, or why my close friends that are in relationships constantly make jokes about me being crazy when it came to men. I’m definitely on the scale , but isn’t every woman? As told by history, any woman with a voice is borderline insane? Yeah.

I mean what’s wild is, I have really high standards written out for myself, a list of my ideal partner. A list that I try to embody myself. I still go for the same kind of men, because, as ive said before, I’m emotionally unavailable. So men that are on the same level as me, work for me for right now. I’m comfortable and I feel more in control dating or seeing men that I know wouldn’t work long term – and they know it too. We basically keep each other occupied. The one before the one.

Fast forward to when I heard of a term called ‘Limerence’. Limerence can be described as an experience of insanely strong desire for a person. But obsessive. Like being stuck in a limbo of being uncertain and hopeful, never really knowing which one.

Although I don’t completely relate to it, there is aspects of limerence that have made sense to me when I have thought I’ve liked someone. Almost as if, when the chase started to diminish, or it started to be mutual - I lost interest- I know it links to that idea of physical validation but this I believe goes deeper. 

It’s a hectic thing to be aware of, but I simply feel like a child in a play centre, where everything is so exciting, there’s so much fun to choose from and you want to have a turn of it all! then when another child has a turn, you immediately HAVE to have what they have. Or that toy is so high up you need someone else’s help to get it down! But when you get it , you realise its just like the other toy you had just been enjoying. It’s  that exciting sensation of the unknown per se. its intense, and uncontrollable. Its overwhelming, consuming and keeps you distracted. But it isn’t healthy. 

This isn’t to say men are toys. Or people for that matter. They are not. Peoples feelings are real and vulnerable. And to have someone show you who they are and feel completely comfortable in your energy, is really special and rare. Real connection is not a game and a person who is meant for you, will never feel like they’re toying with you or make you feel like you’re on a shelf waiting to be picked. But if im being completely real, this is how I have felt in the past.

Its hard to be apart of a world where everyone compares every situation, when they are all so different. We all have different life experiences that bring us here. We’ve had partners that have destroyed our confidence and trust in other people and relationships that have been results of unhealthy addiction or obsession that just proves to be nothing positive. The way we each view the world will always be inherently different because WE are. My understanding of me is going to be different to the next persons, ill never see what you do about me, and you’ll never know all of me. Its funny how that works?

L, xox.

[hereherehereherehere]

A Song of wishes….that is what Isabella heard. The slow yet melodic playing of the piano and other instruments lulled her to come back. But happiness and adrenaline kept her away as she ran through the castle barefoot, running up and down the stairs and stopping at windows every once in a while. She looked out the windows at the beautiful town below. A town full of music, friends, and happiness. Something she was not allowed….

And as she neared her room again the music faded, the light seemed to dull right before her eyes. And any happy feeling had seemingly seeped out from her body. Starting at her head and going down to her toes. A feeling that was oddly familiar to say. It was never a pleasant feeling. She let out a sigh as she reached for the door handle; well all dreams had to come to an end didn't they?

She turned the ivory handle, the old rusted metal of the door creaked as she pushed it open on its old hinges. And then all was white. The end of the dream had come, and with it, the temporary end of her happiness.

Once she had opened her eyes once more she was back in her bed. In the same old room of her home. A two bedroom apartment of which she shared with 2 people, her mother and her sister. She reached blindly for her phone to check the time and saw it was only a few minutes till her alarm went off. She sighed and went ahead and dismissed the alarm and started getting up. Gathering her hoodie, her charger, and her headphones she made her way to the living room quietly to start getting ready for the day.

Honestly she really had to imagine sometimes, how someone can sleep so much, yet infinitely be tired like they hadn't slept in weeks. But at this point the feeling had become numb to her. The tiredness was still there but she was so used to it that sometimes she could ignore it. She turned on some lights and plugged in her charger, to make sure her phone stayed at 100 percent until she left for school was crucial.

At the thought of school she checked her grades. They were good, perfectly average like she wanted them to be. Not high enough that she would get labeled as the smart nerd but not low enough that she would be classified as dumb. She was truthfully smart enough to be making straight A’s. But was that really her place? She had never felt like she was meant to be number one. In fact the best way she could explain her feelings was that she was meant to be a background character. There was never going to be some huge climax or happy ending for her, she was simply there to support the main characters. To help them grow and see their faults while she ignored her own, which would lead to her doom at some point wouldn't it? I mean when does the side character ever get to have a happy ending that was truly theirs?

She does as she's told, helps people a little too much. Just do what other people want so people wouldn't see her as a threat like something they had to win against. She hated competitions, she was always second or dead last, no in-between. No matter how hard she tried, how long she practiced. No matter how much effort, blood, sweat and tears she put into something, she was simply not destined to win.

But she was alright with that. She had been done caring for a while now. You can only cry about something for so long before you have to get over it.

Plus why would she go out and put in the effort to not win, when she could stay home, read books, eat food, and play video games. She would rather see the frowns and sad faces than this disappointing look and that gut-wrenching feeling of failure anyway.

-------------------------------------------------------

This is just a little blurb I wrote about myself ages ago

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 328: Pandora’s Box of Discourse

Previously on BnHA: DEKU TOOK A BATH.

Today on BnHA: 

Also Naomasa grew a beard. Goddamn. 

please let this be a cool chapter that plays nice with my ADHD lol

(ETA: lol I feel guilty because a lot of people hated this chapter, but I’m just happy there was a lot of stuff to make fun of, and also that I have another week to work on my backlog of meta posts since the kids were MIA.)

around one month ago?? ah, okay, so we’re gonna find out what was in that Tartarus security file huh

I love that they just randomly set the place on fire

was it necessary to do this in order to escape? no. was it a good idea to set the island they were occupying on fire while they were in the midst of still occupying it? uh. was it cinematic as fuck? fuck yeah

wow it’s a pervert!!

that’s so great that the villains set loose this fine fellow who I’m sure is definitely not a serial rapist. truly the LoV is so noble and misunderstood. they’re just trying to free society from its chains people

oh my god??!

SHANKED!!! oh my god I cheered for Stain before I realized what I was doing. time to have an identity crisis I guess

so he’s all “hey what’s going on.” which, while a respectable question, is something I personally would have waited to ask until I had put a bit of distance between myself and the fiery murder island. but that’s just my personal preference

Stain you really are tenacious I’ll give you that

“what’s the point of escaping prison if you’re not gonna be smart about it” well shit. anyways yeah you’re dead right, society is in the process of collapsing and the outside world is in total chaos, good call there

oh shit

I mean it’s not like we really expecting anything otherwise, but still. fucking brutal. I feel like these guys’ fates were decided the minute that one guy called AFO “scum” back in chapter 94. AFO is unmatched at getting long-term revenge

??

ahh, was it the security footage??

fdsdfk he’s still alive??

and he’s immediately launching into an inappropriately theatrical monologue even as the darkness closes in on him fdlfksjdlk. you know, was it ever confirmed that the other guy back in chapter 297 was Seiji’s dad? I’m just saying

very impressed that he’s still coherent enough to weigh the pros and cons before making the decision to gamble on giving this info to Stain, who at the very least has his own moral code and isn’t allied with AFO. it was definitely still a risk, but as we now know it was also the right call

what a weird alliance. so Stain tells him that he’ll give it to a just person, and the guy is all,

okay for real though I’m gonna need someone to run a DNA test on this guy. maybe it was some kind of cuckold situation?? the other guy had the family resemblance, but this guy absolutely 100% raised Shishikura Seiji and you are not going to convince me otherwise

anyway, so Stain is all,

PRISON GUARD: “???? ??????? what the hell. what the fuck does that fucking mean. I’m dying here, jesus christ, whatever man fuck you”

(ETA: I kind of feel like this might have been Stain’s last appearance in the manga, given all the fanfare. there’s not really much else he can do for the story at this point, and he seems to have gotten all the character development Horikoshi was planning on giving him. so if this really is it, hasta la vista and good riddance I guess.)

DWLFDKSLDK MEANWHILE, OUTSIDE

(ETA: I feel like this is meant to be evocative of that Sermon on the Mount painting, but in a really fucked up way lol.)

if it were me stumbling upon this scene I would just shake my head and walk right back into the flaming building. not getting involved in that mess. sorry not sorry. I’ll take my chances with the fire, especially given that it’s half-assed neutered BnHA fire lol

blah blah blah and so he decided to pass the info on to All Might -- HOT DAMN, HOLY SHIT

NAOMASA HOLY SHIT. THE APOCALYPSE LOOKS GOOD ON YOU, BOY

“I really like that facial scruff thing Aizawa’s got going on, I think I’m gonna get in on that” yes sir. “also thinking of ditching the tie in favor of the bulletproof vest look. also thinking of getting totally fucking jacked.” good lord. except I’m pretty sure that’s just body armor, but also I don’t care. anyway I should probably stop staring and actually read the fucking speech bubbles here lol

“All Might first handed this information over to Nao, and then went to see Deku, and then came back to Nao” thanks for that tidy little summary Horikoshi. we are capable of piecing events together in sequential order, I just want you to know that. but thank you

“so has Deku finally gotten a bath? also, sucks that Stain saved the day, but what are you gonna do” Nao I missed you so fucking much and didn’t even realize. how am I just now realizing that you are the perfect man

for a second I was gonna ask why Tartarus’s security systems would be cut off from the outside world, and then I remembered that’s a basic security control, and then I actually got impressed by how sensible that is. like, it’s been a while since I could genuinely say that the good guys (excluding class 1-A) did something smart. not that it helped them much in the end, but still

anyway so they’re talking about how AFO was able to coordinate the attack by communicating between his horcrux self on the outside and his ugly peanut-faced self on the inside

huh

okay you have my attention. I am taking notes here lol please continue

ah okay so he says that prior to Jakku, the transfer of information between him and his Vestige self was only one-way. but post-Jakku when Deku was in the hospital, he was able to tell what was happening inside the OFA Radical Lisa Frank Dead People Book Club Realm when he touched him. I feel like we established that before, actually. but he didn’t talk about how it actually felt, though

boy we already know this lol. yes AFO can talk with his horcrux self. and he can also communicate with his little bro in OFA too, let’s talk about that sometime why don’t we. what exactly does that imply, based on the rules we’ve established here

my god I cannot get over Naomasa and his fucking facial hair

no wonder All Might was in such a hurry to leave Deku and get back here

like I have no idea what this radio waves nonsense is but my god, people

that jawline. also so it’s a quirk, I see. except last I checked Deku didn’t have a radio waves quirk, so that doesn’t really explain his connection to AFO. but whatever, hopefully we’re at least getting closer to some kind of reveal here

(ETA: since I sometimes forget that other people’s lives don’t revolve around my theory posts, here are the two relevant links if you by chance want to know my thoughts about this.

Hagakure is still The U.A. Traitor™ regardless of whether Deku is passing information on to AFO through his psychic link, which he almost certainly is.

speaking of said psychic link, Deku is a horcrux.

just posting these now, because whenever trippy OFA stuff happens I tend to get an influx of theory asks. so hopefully this will be a bit of a time saver lol.)

-- wait, what

THAT’S what the recording was??!? holy SHIT. I genuinely was not expecting that. y’all wiretapped his fucking telepathy. fucking quirks, man. wild

AND THEY USED THAT POWER TO DETERMINE WHAT WE ALREADY KNEW, HUZZAH. GOOD SHOW

-- oh shit wait lol, except I forgot we’re not talking about 38 days from the present, we’re talking about 38 days from the date the conversation was recorded. heh. um

yeah that’s the face I would make too if All Fucking Might just casually told me we had eight days left until the end times

oh, pardon me. three fucking days

r.i.p. anyone who thought we were going to have another band arc sob. I sure hope Deku is enjoying that nap

(ETA: I realize people were hoping for a longer rest period here, but given that the man warned us all the way back in chapter 306 that we were entering the final act, you can’t really blame him too much when that turns out to be true. anyway but I do recognize that we’ve reached the point in the story where this kind of discourse is going to become a weekly occurrence, simply because there’s no possible way for Horikoshi’s actual endgame to line up perfectly with the variable headcanons of millions of fans, all of whom have wildly differing and in many cases contradictory expectations which can’t possibly all be fulfilled. anyway, so I’m already bracing myself for that lol. this coming year is going to be a wild ride.)

damn, U.A. out here looking like the motherfucking United Nations

-- is this U.A.?? I actually just realized, U.A. is four interconnected buildings, not two. wait holy shit is this Shiketsu?

wait holy SHIT

based on the overwhelmingly powerful vibes of bureaucratic incompetence, I’m thinking this really is the (future) U.N., or whatever organization it is that deals with international hero stuff

“just let them handle it themselves I’m sure they’ll be fine” yeah okay, thanks guys. appreciate it

wait oh shit did he say that it’s not just Japan?

soooo, what you’re telling me is that AFO is this close to bringing about the end of not just Japan, but the entire world, and you guys don’t think it’s a good idea to help the Japanese heroes stop him? so, genuine follow-up question: are you guys already planning your rich people exodus into space a la Wall-E, and that’s why you don’t give a fuck?? like, what??

omg international heroes

these guys are from World Hoodie Mission, right? is this Horikoshi’s way of reminding me to buy tickets

(ETA: and it worked too lol.)

WHO??? WHAT???

don’t tell me you’re introducing yet another badass new female character for me to fall in love with only to watch as you dismember them and/or blow them up, Horikoshi. I’m getting tired of playing this game my dude. don’t lie and tell me this time will be different. we’re not doing this again goddammit

noooooooooooooooooooo

god fucking dammit lmao. [sighs and rips the previous paragraph into shreds]

on behalf of Americans I apologize for our superheroes always being Like This

I also apologize because I love her already and I’m gonna be shameless about it. so fucking shameless you guys

is her fucking hair red white and blue. it is, isn’t it

this is the volume cliffhanger, 100% lol. it will take every ounce of Horikoshi’s willpower not to put her on the volume cover. he’ll have to settle for the spine or the inner cover this time because Deku VS his class 1-a superpals takes precedence. but it will be a close thing let me tell you

tbh it’s that smile that does it for me. she’s definitely All Might’s protege. get out there and show them how it’s done girl. and maybe call Salaam and BRD and see if you can’t convince them to play hooky from their governments as well. why not. world’s ending in three days you guys. “sorry, I’m busy this weekend” ain’t gonna cut it lol

so while I am not fully caught up with Vigilantes, I have read far enough to know that there’s an American hero named Captain Celebrity whose superpower from what I recall is being a humongous douchebag. and while I haven’t read far enough to know what happens to this guy, I can’t say I’m very disappointed to learn that he’s no longer the number one hero in the U.S. (actually, didn’t they kick him out and that’s why he moved to Japan to begin with?). anyway, so my thanks to Horikoshi for having a marginally higher opinion of Americans than Furuhashi, even though we have definitely not done anything to warrant said opinion lately, and you may have inadvertently opened the door to a pandora’s box of discourse lmao

(ETA: lol I went into the tags and they don’t disappoint. “why is she dressed like a flag” because she’s an homage to Captain America and Major Victory and literally every other character on this list. again, I apologize for fictional American superheroes being Like This. “oh boy another thicc waifu to make the fanboys happy” look, tumblr fandom never seems to have a problem thirsting over Dabi or Tomura or Aizawa or Nao, lol, I’m just saying. “where is Captain Celebrity” idk, probably murdered by the exploding bee cartel, let’s just be grateful for our good fortune and try not to Beetlejuice the man.)

anyway, so let’s see if Horikoshi’s recent character development with regards to making Mineta not terrible anymore will apply to other aspects of his writing as well. I know I was making light of discourse just now, but I do think the complaints about him introducing yet another new character at the 11th hour to be cannon fodder in the final battle are absolutely valid. and again, it wouldn’t be a problem if he didn’t keep maiming/killing off his female characters one by one instead of developing them and letting them kick ass long-term. but that said, I will never complain about Horikoshi adding another female character to the series, regardless of how clumsy the attempt may be. go ahead and pander away, just give us more girl power lol

anyway so we’ll see how it goes, but I think I’m gonna be optimistic and let myself hope once again, even though I’m probably gonna regret it lol. it is what it is. she is standing on an airplane just chilling for fuck’s sake. I’m only human. anyway fingers crossed

[mythiccheroacademia]

What You Fight About

part 2

A/N: just something I thought about

Headcanon: what you two would fight about the most

Warnings: toxic behaviors, yelling, cursing, angst

Midoriya Izuku:

his absence

being the number one hero is demanding

it’s also been his dream since he could remember

you understood that, but that didn’t mean it didn’t frustrate you when he’d disappear for days at a time

izuku tries to balance his job and home life

but it isn't enough

~~~

You and Izuku don’t fight much. In fact, you never really do. You’re both so compromising that disagreements rarely happen.

But when your kid is involved, that complacency slips away. Even when it comes to one another.

“I’m done talking about this.”

“Honey, why won’t you just listen to me?” he begged, but the irritation in his tone gave it more sharpness than he intended. “[S/N] doesn’t need the tutor. It’s just the teacher.”

You began to pick up the leftover toys from floor more so to expel pent up energy rather than to simply clean. You scoffed, shaking your head. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Excuse me?” Midoriya snipped. His eyes followed you as you discarded the toys and crossed your arms beside the couch, finally giving him your attention. “I think I know my own son, Y/N.”

Izuku cared so much for your child and you knew that. But that underlying message your brain processed within his words pissed you off.

“And you think I don’t?”

“I just don’t think you’re giving him enough credit.”

An incredulous laugh left your lips before they moved into a frown. “He’s failing 4th grade, Izuku. We can’t move him to a different classroom every time he gets a bad grade. At some point, we have to take responsibility! He needs the extra help!”

“You just don’t understand,” the hero muttered, running a hand through his hair.

What he said shouldn’t have set you off, but it did. Everything suddenly flooded your head. All the stress you had to deal with alone bubbled up your throat and exploded.

“No, you don’t understand!”

“Yes I do!”

“How!? You’re barely in his fucking life anyways!”

It went silent shortly after that.

The outburst felt good, but the aftermath made your squeeze with guilt. Izuku’s frown softened into shock before melting into something deeper than pain.

Once your words finally processed through your head, you immediately tried to take it back.

“Izuku, I didn’t mean that—”

“Yes you did.”

You thickly swallowed and averted your eyes to the floor. He was right. You did. You’d been wanting to say it for so long, but this wasn’t the way you planned to deliver those thoughts.

Your gaze moved back to your husband once he gathered his duffle bag and slid on his shoes.

“Baby,” you sighed, your voice much softer than before. It was almost insane how easily the anger left you. “Where are you going?”

You wilted with his next words. “I’ll stay over at the agency. To give you some space. We’ll talk more after we’ve both cooled down,” he sadly smiled.

Despite the hurt silver-lining his green eyes, Midoriya softly held your chin and kissed your forehead. Something he always did when your disagreements didn’t end on a good note. As if to reassure you that, even though he was upset, he still loved you all the same.

And that just made you feel worse.

“’Zuku��”

“Don’t worry about [S/N]. I’ll take him to school tomorrow.” He paused to look you in your eyes. “I love you, always.”

“I love you too,” you quietly resigned and watched him disappear behind the front door leaving you to let your head fall into your hands.

Bakugo Katsuki

his jealousy

bakugo is confident in many areas of his life

it’s one of his qualities that won you over

but he still had those tiny insecurities that showed up in large ways

aka losing you

and he had no idea how to handle it

~~~

The alcohol probably wasn’t a good idea considering Bakugo was already noticeably pissed on the way to the house party. But everyone assumed it was just another one of his moods he’d get over sooner or later. He wasn’t a drinker, but a beer or two usually loosened him up.

However, your friends looked at each other with worry behind the door to the room you two were in. Despite the party lights and booming stereo, they could hear the angry muffled yelling you two were doing.

You were 100% drunk, but you were 110% sure this man was telling you to stay away from your friend. Your best friend.

“If it’s one thing you have, it’s the audacity,” you sassily quipped.

“I’m not fucking playing around with you, Y/N,” Bakugo snapped with too much bite than you cared to hear. “I want you to stay away from that two-bagged eyed bastard!”

“You always do this! Shinsou’s my friend!”

The redness in his ears wasn’t only from the drinks as his nostrils flared with barely contained irritation. “Friend my ass. You didn’t see the way he was looking at you, and that fucker had the nerve to grab you in front of me!”

“He was moving me out of the way!”

“He fucking felt you up is what he did!”

You smacked your teeth, entirely done with the argument. You weren’t getting anywhere. “Now you’re just being delusional.”

Bakugo pinched the bridge of his nose and blew out in a desperate attempt to calm himself. A feat even he was surprised about considering the situation. He tried so hard to not be as explosive, to reign in his emotions, for you. But his jealousy burned hot within his veins.

“Y/N. I’m asking you, as your man, to put some distance between you and Shinsou,” he lowly warned.

Maybe it was the wrong thing to say, but the words flew out of your mouth before you could stop them. “Like hell I will. Hitoshi’s been here longer than you have by years. I’m not gonna drop him just because you feel insecure.”

That withered away any form of self-restraint Katsuki had left. He felt exposed and hurt. And dealt with that the best way he knew how.

His hazy brain clouded over with anger and he went on the defensive.

“I bet you want him.”

“What? No I don’t?”

“You’re probably sleeping with him behind my fucking back,” he dryly laughed. “Am I not good enough anymore? Is that it?”

You were quickly sobering up. “What the fuck is wrong with you!? Of course not! I’m not a cheater!”

“Then why won’t cut him off, damn it!?”

Your voices rose in volumes too high for comfort. The crackle in his palms didn’t scare you one bit, but it was enough for Kirishima and Mina to come in and try to separate you two.

You ignored their pleading and the two of your found each other in the other’s face.

“Why are you so jealous!?”

“BECAUSE HE’S TAKING YOU AWAY FROM ME!!”

“NO HE’S NOT!

“IT’S SO EASY FOR YOU TO DEFEND HIM AND PROBABLY JUST AS EASY FOR YOU TO SPREAD YOUR FUCKING LEGS—"

A resounding slap cut him short. That seemed to snap him out of whatever alcohol induced rage he was in. However, Bakugo only had a moment to register your expression of disgust before Kirishima pulled him away.

“Fuck you, asshole” was the last thing you said before Mina lead into the hallway.

Kirishima watched his friend’s breathing turn ragged with each puff.

“Come on, man. Let’s just—”

“FUCK!” Katsuki roared before throwing a nearby water bottle to the floor. He fisted his hair and clenched his teeth.

He messed up. Big time.

And as upset as he was with himself, he couldn’t help but be even angrier at the thought of who you’d run to first.

Todoroki Shouto:

how blunt he is

he was a bit socially inept and you loved him for that

but sometimes, you get frustrated

todoroki does too because 9 times out of 10 he doesn’t understand why

when you get angry, he completely shuts down bc he doesn’t know how to handle it any other way

and it didn’t help that he was petty asf

~~~

“Okay.”

You looked up and folded your lips in a tight line. It was the same monotone answer he’d been giving you all day and it was getting on your nerves.

“Sho, baby, can you at least try and act like you somewhat care about this vacation we’re planning,” you said as sweetly as possible.

Although you were annoyed, you understood that things flew over your boyfriend’s head sometimes and, hopefully, a little nudge would point him in the right direction.

“I’m listening, prince(ss),” he dimly responded.

He didn’t bother to look up from the papers he was reading at the table and it made you huff. Folding up the magazine, you just stalked your way out of the kitchen.

“You know what? Don’t even bother. I’ll do it myself.”

That made Shouto look up. His brows furrowed in confusion and he caught your hand before you could completely pass by him. Why were you suddenly upset? He told you he was listening.  

“Hey, wait. What’s wrong? Did I do something?” he asked.

You let him pull you in between his legs. He looked genuinely lost and it was enough to soften your exterior.

“I just feel like you don’t care sometimes,” you said, deciding to just be blunt.

“Huh?” he hummed. “What do you mean?”

You shrugged. “I don’t know…it just seems like you don’t have an interest in anything I have to say if it doesn’t involve hero work, your family, or something like that.”

Todoroki took offense to that. Of course he cared about what you had to say. He loved you. Just because he wasn’t gripping on to every word you spoke in mundane life didn’t mean he didn’t care.

There were ways to express his thoughts, but Shouto wasn’t always the best at gently doing it.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t agree,” he said.

You looked off to the side for a second before looking down at him. “Well that’s how I feel,” you retorted.

“I’m sorry you feel that way, but you’re wrong.”

You watched him for a moment, waiting for him to explain himself. However, he just stared back at you as if there was nothing else left to say. The silence was sickening.

You snatched your hand out his grip. “Okay, Shouto,” you bit and left.

He hadn’t heard his first name in a while.

Your boyfriend dumbly blinked already feeling more lost. He didn’t understand why you were so angry.

He called Midoriya about it and was told he was being intolerant. The entire conversation honestly made him feel like an asshole and Todoroki didn’t like that at all. So he gave you some space before finding you in the kitchen again, this time equipped to right his wrongs—even though he still wasn’t entirely sure what he did.

He called your name once and instead of responding, you just kept going about your task. That sort of miffed him, but he tried again. This time, you hummed back but the tension behind it made him feel defensive for some odd reason.

“Can we talk about this morning?”

“What? Are my feelings suddenly valid to you now?” you sarcastically replied.

Todoroki raised a sharp brow at your attitude and decided he was over it already. Here he was trying to apologize, and you were being difficult. He wouldn’t fight with you over something so insignificant.

“Fine. When you’re done with your little tantrum, we can talk about this like adults.”

You’d never spun around so quickly. “Really, Todoroki?”

Last name basis. Petty.

But he was even pettier.

“Yes, really, [L/N].”

His half-lidded bored stare made your scalp prickle.

“Fine. Me and my little tantrum are gonna go somewhere and you can plan the vacation all by yourself like the adult you are.”

“Fine. I’d probably get it done faster anyways.”

You let out an offended gasp. “Fine!”

“Fine!” he tsked, crossing his arms.

You two looked away from one another and stomped out of the room in childish anger.

[thegryffindorprincess]

Two In A Bed//Draco Malfoy x Reader

A/N: Holy Cow I’ve finally reached 100 followers wow! Firstly, thank you! Secondly, I’ve promised myself I’m gonna post at least three days a week from now on, so feel free to send any requests you have my way! Enjoy this little cliche piece of ‘two exes have to share a bed’.

Set: Post War

Word Count: 1,550

Warnings: swearing, drinking, sexual tension, SMUT

Y/N Y/L/N dragged her black suit case behind her as she climbed the stone steps to the grand country hotel that towered in front of her. She hovered at the door, pausing to check her apperance in the glass before pushing them open. The grand hallway was decorated in silver and green- very Pansy she thought to herself as she wandered over to the check-in desk. 

“Hi, I’m a guest at Pansy and Theo’s wedding tomorrow?” The bored teenage wizard behind the desk flicked through the parchment guest list and once Y/N had told him her name, he handed her a small silver key; room three hundred and two. Making her way up the stairs, struggling a little with her suitcase, her mind began to wonder whether Draco would be attending. Since she moved to America for work, she’d heard nothing from her ex and was even slightly surprised to have been invited to Pansy’s wedding. When she reached her room, Y/N struggled with the lock before finally unlocking the door and throwing it open. As she lugged her suitcase in, eyes to the ground, she was shocked when her body hit into a much taller one. 

“What a pleasant surprise Y/L/N.” God, his voice was so smooth, Cheeks flushed red, Y/N met Draco’s bright, blue eyes, taking in his appearance. He hadn’t changed much, he was still tall, pale and well dressed. 

“What are you doing in my room?” Was the only thing Y/N could mumble as she attempted to avoid his fixed gaze. 

“My room, you mean.” Y/N huffed before showing him her key only to find out he was holding up an identical one. 

“There must be some mistake, we can’t share this room,” Y/N began to pace, “Merlin’s sake it’s only got one bed.” Draco laughed at her a little. 

“It’s not ideal for me either darling, Pansy didn’t want my wife here and now has me sharing a bed with another women.” He suddenly stood, gently sliding his feet into his shoes, “I’ll go and sort it out.” 

Y/N watched as he left, sitting down on the bed, raking her hands through her hair. She heard the door open and instead of seeing Draco, Pansy stood at the door, face contorted in a sneaky smile. 

“If this wasn’t your wedding, I would kill you.” Y/N warned as Pansy walked over to join her on the bed, Pansy giggling quietly. 

“I couldn’t help myself, you’re just still in love with eachother and I wanted to help.” She smirked. Y/N shot her a dangerous scowl, which Pansy rolled her eyes at.

“He’s married Pans, for fuck sake.” 

“Yeah, an arranged, loveless marriage.” The words left her mouth, causing Y/N’s jaw to drop to the floor, Draco entered, causing the two of them to quickly regain composure. He announced that the wizard at the desk had instructed him to talk to Pansy about his room problem. 

“Sorry Drakey, there’s no rooms left,” Pansy said slyly before making her way to the door, “so you two will just have to be very grown-up and share.” With that, she left, giving Y/N a small wink as she closed the door. 

Draco and Y/N sat in silence for a while before either of them decided to speak. Then they launched into deep conversation, talking about her travels, his work, their lives and it felt as if they’d never lost contact. Draco didn’t mention Astoria once. When dinner time rolled around, Draco got ready first, letting Y/N have the bathroom for as long as she needed. When she stepped out in her knee length green dress, Draco was unsure on where to look. Instead, he simply let Y/N take his arm as he led her to the dining hall to meet the other guests. The dinner was spectacular, Y/N wondered how much the whole thing had cost Theo’s parents. The alcohol was effectively unlimited and before long Y/N was beginning to feel a little dizzy. As guests began leaving, she attempted to stand, swaying on the balls of her feet. Draco ran to her rescue, one of his strong arms sweeping around her waist to help her up the stairs. When they reached their room, he helped her in, leaving her to stand while he fetched her water. 

“I’m going to get undressed now.” Y/N announced, half shouting, swaying in her seat as she sat down on the bed. “Don’t look freak.” Draco threw his arms up in mock innocence before turning around to face the wall while she took off her dress. “You can look now.” He turned back to look at her and audibly sighed when he saw her in just her underwear. “Liking what you see Malfoy.” Y/N teased. She stood and before she could stop herself she was standing in front of him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and leant in, closing the gap between them. Draco’s hands found her waist and he pulled her into him, returning her kiss with twice the passion. Then all of a sudden, he pulled back, pushing her from him gently. 

“I’m sorry, I can’t do this.” He whispered. He silently gathered his stuff from the room and sent her a sympathetic look. “I’m married.” Y/N watched him stuff his suitcase, still standing, saying nothing. Draco strode to the door, pulling his suitcase behind him. As he opened the door to leave he turned on his heal to look back at her. “I can’t fall in love with you again.” And with that, he left. 

XXXX

Y/N awoke to gentle rays of winter sunshine peaking through the gap in the curtains. She groaned as she remembered last night and realised her head was pounding relentlessly. Y/N stretched out in the kingsize bed before rolling over to look at the time. Eleven AM- shit. The wedding started in half an hour. She quickly jumped from the bed, sprinting around the room, perfecting her makeup, curling her hair and squeezing into her silver dress. She was finished just in time and sprinted down the hotel stairs and into the grand hall, throwing herself onto her seat. 

“Rough night last night Y/L/N?” Blaise teased as she let out a deep breath. 

“Fuck off Zabini.” She spat, he let out a chuckle. The wedding was beautiful, Pansy’s dress was stunning, the ceremony emotional and the wedding dinner as immaculate as the night before. Y/N barely drunk today though, regretting her actions last night. Draco was a no show to any part in the wedding, which left Y/N with a pit in her stomach, knowing he’d gone back to his wife. She left the wedding disco early, before anyone else, making her way back to her room at only eleven at night. As she flounced down her bed there was a soft knock on the door. 

“Go away Pansy.” Y/N yelled.  The door opened anyway, causing her to groan. 

“Not Pansy.” Draco appeared at the foot of the bed, causing Y/N to sit bolt upright. He nervously played with the family ring that snaked around his pale finger. “My wife’s fucking her boss.” He sat down next to her. 

“Oh,” Y/N sighed, “I’m sorry Dray...” 

“I’m not.” Draco suddenly turned towards her, placing his hand on her thigh, making her gasp a little. “It means I can do what I wanted to do yesterday.” With that he pulled her into him by her jaw, causing Y/N to release a shaky moan. “I’m going to file for a divorce,” He whispered while placing sloppy kisses onto her neck, “not that I ever loved her.” He swiftly fell to his knees, using a firm hand to part Y/N’s legs. “Fuck.” Y/N watched as Draco rolled and buttoned his shirt sleeves, showing off his forearm, the dark mark poking dangerously under the sleeve. With that he pulled Y/N towards him, nestling his head between her legs, dragging his ring finger over her clothed slit. She moaned again quietly, watching his every movement. 

“Are you sure you want this angel?” He asked, suddenly softly. 

“Yes. Draco I-” He suddenly moved her panties to the side before pushing his face against her pussy. He began to eat out so slow and sensually, Y/N felt like she was going to explode. Draco ate her until her legs began to shake, letting her cum on his face. Then he twisted her round, arching her back with his hands. His pale hand came down onto her ass with a smack before he teased her entrance with his tip. 

“Fuck me Draco, please.” Y/N moaned quietly. Draco needed no more motivation, pushing his entire length into her, causing her to writhe beneath him. He began to pound into her at a ridiculous pace, not giving Y/N time to think. Draco’s hand came down to grab her hair into his fist, pulling her neck back so that their eyes met. 

“Sorry princess, I just want to see your face when I cum in you.” With that Y/N’s legs gave way once more, her mouth screaming his name along with many profanities. With a few more thrusts, Draco came inside of her with a groan, pulling out and inspecting his work. Then, he leant down, placing a tender kiss to her forehead. 

“I should’ve never left.” 

[angelkurenai]

Break those rules - Dean Winchester x Reader

Title: Break those rules

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Warnings: None

Prompt: Hey! So this is my attempt at making a request: DeanxReader where feelings have not been expressed yet. They're just researching some stuff together. The reader absent mindedly smiles when they're reading something. Deano notices. Then he just kind of jabbers about how adorable the reader's smile is. End with a kiss and finally expressed feelings maybe? I wrote a short little writing prompt kind of like this on my blog. (It's near the bottom if you want a better idea for the request) Thanks! xxx

“I don't get why Sam has to get away with only three hours of research and I am stuck here for the fifth hour. In a row.” Dean said with a rather heavy, and even more dramatic, sigh as he flipped open another book and rested his chin on his palm.

“Stuck here huh? Wow, way to make me, and the company I offer you, feel so flattered, Winchester.” you said as you looked up at him through your lashes. He couldn't see much of your face as you kept focus on the book before you but that didn't mean he couldn't hear the obvious playfulness that laced your voice or nearly feel, let alone imagine, the small smirk that tucked at the corner of your lips.

“You know what I mean.” and still, despite your easiness, he couldn't help but feel a pang in his chest if only for the pout you gave him – playful or not – and he rushed to speak again “To tell you the truth, being in your company does make it ten times better and always worth it, but-” he raised a finger “That's still not enough to make up for...” he looked down at the books, his face a mix between horror, disgust and exhaustion as he said “This. And besides, we're not even making progress as it is. Field work could do much more or say if it was more than just the two of us here, there could be en end to... this.”

“This-” you tried to mimic his tone “Is what we can only do now, I am afraid, no field work left. And to answer your previous question: Sam gets away with three hours because he's already read through his part of books. Meanwhile you are stuck over that book for the past hour. And you're not going anywhere before you read the rest either. Stop stalling.”

“Then stop being so distracting, for a change yeah?” he couldn't help but mumble as he rested his chin on his palm and slid a little bit down his seat.

“How? I didn't even start this in the first place!” you protested, eyes wide.

But certainly not as wide as his when he realized the words had really slipped past his lips “What- n-no, I- I didn't-” he started but actually stopped himself “Well, actually-” he felt bold, maybe even looked like it and hopefully - he prayed to any deity that didn't hold a grudge on him and that was listening - that he looked confident as he imagined in his head; or at least the part of his head where he wasn't freaking out “You heard me. It would be much easier to focus if you weren't so distracting.”

“Do tell? And what is so distracting about what I said? Seeing as you were the one to start this conversation.” you asked with a small smirk, ready to sass him out of anything that he could come up with, just like you'd done so many times before. Or so you expected.

“Nothing.” he shrugged, face mostly neutral save for the casual half smile “It's not what you said. It's not anything you did either. It's just you being you. You're distracting. I just look at you and get carried away in an instant. Sometimes you're so distracting I can't even get my thoughts in an order, let alone focus on research. So, no, really you are the only one to blame here. But ain't that in the best way possible, huh sweetheart?” he asked with his smile turning into a grin.

He was proud at himself for getting it all out without a single stutter and even more praising himself deep down for not showing any of the panic he was feeling, slip through. Because oh there were all kinds of red lights and sirens going off in his head at the moment; he was freaking out not only at this newfound surge of bravery but also at the words that were really coming out of his lips in this very moment. Why now, when after all this time he had held them back along with his infatuation- schoolgirl crush, Sam would say and he would be 100% right about it even if Dean never admitted it out loud. And even more he was proud with himself for - by whatever miracle - how it did sound like he was flirting and not struggling to be a human. So much so that he huffed his chest out a bit, thinking that if today was the day - and it seemed so because of how he really was on a roll - then so be it. He had not had any previous signs to you being interested in him as he was in you, sure, and for that he feared he probably was simply stupid and not brave but there was really no taking it back now and for the first time he didn't feel like it.

“I-” you started, blinking several times as you looked at him carefully an for a couple dreadful moments of silence when he nearly felt like caving in because of his panic, Dean held his breath, and listened as you spoke up again “Are you for real? I- I mean are you- Dean-” you huffed, your eyebrows pulling into a frown and your lips almost forming a pout that was the exact definition of distracting he was referring to “Seriously, this is not funny at all. If you wanna joke around here then-”

“Joke?” he breathed out before you could get to continue with your words, let alone thoughts “Why would I? No, no. I'm being absolutely honest here.” he shrugged so casually he might have patted himself on the shoulder for the achievement if you weren't there, and if he wasn't so distracted once more by seeing the way your eyes widened and you then blinked before looking down shyly.

And he continued “Sweetheart, I don't get to tell you often and shame on me for that but with Sammy all the time in the way I can't express myself so I'm just gonna go ahead and say it: You're so beautiful that everything you do is distracting to me, even just being in my presence. Sometimes you struggle with that, I get it, given the job we do. But don't let anyone tell you different, because all of it only makes you even more special. Thought-” he shrugged with an easy smile, looking back at his book as if it was nothing, as if he wasn't in a struggle with his very own self to just look at you at all time just to not miss a single reaction “You should probably know that. Not that you're not already aware but I suppose... since we're making small talk. And just so that I let you know, that there is nobody else I'd rather be stuck doing research with.”

Your lips fell apart and the soft sound of “Oh. Oh I- oh.” escaped past them before silence set in the room, one that he enjoyed a little too much as he looked up at you through his lashes only to see you shift and play nervously with your clothes or the pages of your book. You kept opening and closing your mouth before you ended up clearing your throat and straightened your back to look straight at him.

He did the same, meeting your eyes with the most straight face he could master “Yes? Something the matter?”

“No, I- I just- Well-” you cleared your throat again, shifting in your seat “Thank you for- for...”

“For?” he inquired and you shot him a half-hearted glare that melted so soon into the sweetest look he ad ever seen on your face.

“That. What you said. You know what you just said. I don't have to repeat it.” you said so fast, a small huff leaving your lips “A-and I appreciate it. So thank you for it.” your eyes fluttered down to your hands before you shifted in your place “But still-” you gave him a stern look as if to brush the whole topic off; it was the easiest thing when you didn't know how to respond and your whole face felt as if it was on fire “That ain't gonna cut down any research for you. You've gotta get through those books and you won't leave this place until you're done.”

“I wasn't looking for any special treatment.” he shrugged all innocent.

“Good.” you said stubbornly “Bause you ain't getting it. So quit the sweet-talking me and get back to work.”

“Fine, fine!” he raised his arms in surrender, looking down at the book but not stopping the mumbling, loud enough for you to hear “Since when did speaking the truth turn into sweet-talking, I had no idea.”

“Quit it, Winchester. Or else I'll throw this book at you and it will definitely not be a happy ending for you.” you tried to say seriously, putting on a stern face but only for the sake of seeming determined and unaffected; despite what your eyes told him at that moment.

“Fine, fine.” he sighed dramatically “Not that I'm stalling but you just should wear those jeans more oft-” he paused when you narrowed your eyes at him and he rolled his “Alright. They look great on you but I get it. No telling the truth today. Back to work.”

“You're unbelievable sometimes.” this time you scoffed a laugh, shaking your head and he didn't fight his own grin especially as you muttered “Idiot.” at him.

He hummed, this time not looking up at you as he whispered “I am.” and let the comfortable silence fill the room, calming the both of you as you went back to work. Dean even more so than you because - as far as he was concerned - he needed it more than anything.

Surprised and proud as he was at himself for getting all of that out, he still was a mess of emotions all of which refused to die down, and could feel his heart hammering in his chest, his pulse so intense that he felt it to the end of his very own fingertips. And better not get started with the way he could feel a familiar heat spread all the way up his neck, to the tips of his ears and dangerously close to the rest of his face, making him wish that it was at least not obvious to anyone that would look, which really only meant you.

With his head still very much in the clouds, feeling high and dizzy on emotions if not somewhat filled with the aftermath of adrenaline from what could only be an almost-confession, he found himself only skipping through the words, barely paying any attention to them. His fingers played with the pages as he basked in the warmth and comfortable feeling of this newfound silence. It was like coming home after a long time and soaking in the comfortable and familiar warmth of one's bed.

As the words before his eyes blurred for what seemed like, at least, the tenth time in only a couple minutes, he decided that that was it. His mind was running with so many thoughts that he couldn't help it; he wanted to steal another look at you after this endless and at the same time too short silence. Chewing on his lower lip he slowly tore his eyes away from the text and took a good look at you, shameless about it as he should be, as he had every right to be and he wouldn't let anybody tell him otherwise. He was in love, goodness how crazy it was to even think about it, and by the looks of it – by some crazy chance even better – it seemed like there was hope for him that you might feel something for him too.

So why even try to hold back from taking it all in?

The grin on his face only got wider, much as he tried to hold it back, when he saw you pause. Your eyes clearly moved away from the page, deep in thought and with your chin resting on top of your palm. You could very easily hide it if you wanted to, but that didn't seem the case and so Dean could see fully the beautiful smile that graced your lips. Whether it was at something you had just read or because of something he'd previously said he didn't know and frankly it didn't matter. Because the moment he saw that smile his entire mind went blank, there was nothing that it could come up with... unlike his mouth, that is, which had plenty to say apparently.

Gosh how can that smile not turn even the worst tortures to the sweetest thing in the world? It's just so damn beautiful, that I know there's not a single thing I wouldn't do for it. Hell, the moment I saw it for the first time I knew I was a gonner, fell stupidly head over heels for you as anybody else would and the more I got to know you, the more I got to see that smile the more clear it was to me that those feelings were there to stay. And so they have. I knew I would do anything in my power to see it again but to go to such extents? “Hell, sweetheart, I'd climb over freakin' mountains just for that smile and I ain't just getting poetic, you know I never could. There are always different kinds to it that I don't know how you do it but this- this right here is my favorite. It's so free and so true and so damn adorable and you almost try to hide it sometimes and shit that makes me angry at who could have ever made you believe it is not gorgeous enough to show but also so damn stubborn too, to take it upon myself to make you smile like that every freakin' day of your life. I won't get shit done, I know, because it's just so distracting but heavens-” he breathed out, not clear where the air even came from after all the rambling “That smile is worth all of the stars, sweetheart.”

A heavy albeit not uncomfortable, by any means, silence hangs in the room once more after Dean's done with his rambling. He didn't even realize it as the word poured out of his lips, heavens out of his very own heart and soul is better, right there for you to hear, just as he didn't realize the second you stopped looking at the book. Your eyes were currently on him, wide and beautiful as always, blinking in surprise even after you thought that there was nothing that Dean could do that could surprise you more today.

But as the realization downed on Dean, it didn't leave a pleasant shock but rather a chilling one; the same one would get after an ice bucket being dumped on them. Not that he was willing to let you know that, so instead he gave you an awkward smile and asked “...Did I just say that out loud?”

He did, after all, hope that by some high power you hadn't heard a thing and that it was all still words in his head and not a confession – although very much needed – probably poorly-timed.

“I-” your lips parted as you blinked several times in disbelief “Y-yes-” your voice cracked a little “Yes you actually did.”

“O-oh o-ok c-cool.” but not as much as his did, before he cleared his throat “Cool. That's uh terrific... Embarrass myself more than I have in my entire life in the span of half an hour. Way to go Dean.” he mumbled the last part to himself as he looked away from you and down at his book with wide eyes.

“I mean I-” you chewed on your lower lip before you straightened your back a bit more and look at him with a bit more confidence “I would have interrupted you but for one I wanted to hear all of it, seeing how adorable you were being it was a sight for sore eyes, and for another there is a date rule I must keep up with so-” you shrugged but it was anything but innocent with the smile you were sporting.

Not that any of it mattered, because one thing registered above all “Dating? What dating? And what kind of rules?”

“Sadly we don't have a dictionary here but I'm sure you can guess, pretty boy. And as for rules well it goes like: kiss on the first date, everything else after the third date.” you rested your chin on your palm again and looked him in the eyes “Wouldn't wanna break that one, no matter how tempted I was to shut you up with a kiss, you bloody idiot.”

“...You're kidding me right now, right?” his eyes were wide and he only managed to get the words out after a good few seconds of silence. Minutes probably.

“Alright, yes, maybe we do need that dictionary. Listen, I'm gonna put it as simple as possible and pray that that wonderfully smart yet so very stupid brain of yours gets it: You take me out on a date and you can get to be as distracted as you wanted by my smile. Stare at it, kiss it away only to kiss it back up on my lips. Anything you want. Because I've been waiting for too freaking long for you to say these things and I'm done beating around the bush. I am coming clean. I have feelings for you too, Dean.”

Again silence before “...As in for real?”

“Couldn't get any more real. Always had them.” you smiled, this time actually shyly at him.

Pause, a long pause actually, and he blinked rapidly before asking “This is really not you trying to, I don't know, let me down easily or something?”

“Absolutely not, why would I? I meant everything I say.”

“So that means-” he actually held his breath, feeling his head beat so hard it would almost break out of his chest “Are we... you know?”

Your smile turned into a more teasing one, almost a smirk as you shrugged “Only after the first date.”

“So if I did happen to ask you out now, you would...?” he had to be sure this wasn't some kind of dream.

“Say it would be my pleasure.” you nodded your head.

“And- one more question, just-” he raised a finger, taking a calming breath in even if it was a bit shaky “...So long as there's say beer and maybe burgers that's...?”

“The perfect kind of date for me, you know i-”

“Awesome!” his eyes widened and he jumped up from his seat with a grin on his face.

“But not while doing research!” you said fast enough before he could get much further away “No beer and burgers while researching is not a date.”

“Not even a little?” he asked and you shook your head “...Then can research itself maybe be?”

“Absolutely not.” you said despite the pout he was giving you. It did make things harder.

“...But what if I maybe, really wanna get a kiss right now? What do I have to do to get that kiss?”

“Guess what?” you grinned and you could see the hope in his eyes before you made it vanish into thin air “Research!”

“More books, yay!” he said with a huff, his arms falling by his side as he made his way back to his seat “Of course it's books.” he groaned and you couldn't help your grin “But really... nothing else? I know your smile makes it all worth it but honey... this is the worst kind of torture!”

“Alright you big child come here. Can't believe you're making me break my rules.” you sighed with a shake of your head “Just one, for getting this far with research, as a reward.”

“Oh you know I love rewards.” he grinned “How about one about every book I read? And if it ends up otherwise, oh well, Sammy can handle the case alone right?”

“Don't push your luck, Winchester.”

[ithebookhoarder]

Can I get 83 off the angst list with Javier??? It's: Stay there I'm coming to get you

100 ways to say ily Prompt 83: “Stay there. I’m coming to get you” (Javier Peña x F!Reader)

A/N: Ooo, right in the angst. Let’s get to it! I also assume you meant this prompt list rather than the angst one as that’s only up to 20 ;) Don’t worry. I got you tho! I hope you like it x  Apologies for my terrible attempts at Spanish, so let me know if I got any of it wrong.

Warnings: Swearing, violence, blood, references to death (let me know if I missed anything)

Masterlist:

-------

“Javi?”

“Y/N?” 

The sound of his voice was soft as you held the phone to your ear. You could hear the soft echo of music playing in the background telling you he was definitely at home. 

Why wouldn’t he be, given the hour? It was the morning. 3 am to be precise. He should have been asleep. You should have been asleep, but no, you’d had to chase this lead alone. Like an idiot. A strong willed idiot who should have known better. 

But no. The idea of being able to catch one of Escobar’s top employees had been too tempting an opportunity to miss despite the fact the ambassador had said otherwise. In fact, he’d said fuck no, telling all of you to wait it out and get another source to confirm it. 

Apparently a friend of one of Javi’s ex informants wasn’t what they called reliable... even though she had direct access to the people supposed to be gathering tonight at the club you’d been staking out. 

Two hours you’d watched from your car, having snuck out to do so. If Javier and Steve had wanted to behave for once, then that was their call. They could stay and fill out paperwork to their hearts content. 

You didn’t need them for what was supposed to be a routine stake out and observation mission. 

Or so you’d thought. 

The fact you’d been made by one of the gang about thirty minutes after you’d entered the club had put a pretty big dampener on your plan. You hadn’t noticed as they’d arrived, recognising you after you’d almost caught them at a raid only days ago. 

The sicario had slipped away, managing to leap across one of the roofs as you’d chased them across. Had Steve not grabbed your arm and told you it was too dangerous a jump to risk, you’d have followed. 

But here he was, back and ready for payback... and he’d been quick to point you out to the others surrounding him. 

You knew it had been risky to be here and unfortunately, you were proved horrifically right. The fact you’d got away was a minor miracle, even if you were now bleeding. Badly. 

Damn bullet had missed but the graze was agonising, causing you to wince as you clutched at your side, trying to stem the bleeding as best you could. 

“Javi... I messed up.”

“Y/N, hermosa. What is it? What’s wrong? Where are you?”

His questions were relentless, firing one after the other as he detected the fear in your voice. The pain and regret too. 

“I’m ... I’m in an alley... by Fiebre... I’m sorry...”

“No, no. Don’t be sorry. It’s ok,” Javi soothed, panic underlying each word. You could hear him clattering about, most likely grabbing his keys and rushing out of the apartment next to yours. He didn’t need to ask to know what you were doing or why you were there. He knew you too well. He also knew you wouldn’t be calling like this if you weren’t in trouble. Trouble serious enough he had to get to you. Fast. “I’m on my way. Just stay there. I’m coming to get you.” 

A tear rolled down your cheek as the air suddenly felt a lot colder. Like Javi had just turned on the stupid faulty AC unit in your apartment, like he always did when it got late and he was staying over to look over material or keeping you company. 

God. What you’d have given to have him there to hold you right then. To wrap his familiar leather jacket around you like he always did when you forgot a jacket of your own, still forgetting that the hot days often fell into cooler nights. 

You longed for its touch, its scent, its comfort as you stared at the sky and prayed you lived long enough to regret this. 

“Fuck.” Your car was just down the street. You were so close but you didn’t know if you had the strength to make it there. “Javi... I’m bleeding... the bullet... it hit my side... it won’t stop.”

“Y/N, baby. Listen to me. We’re coming. Steve and I. It’s gonna be ok. Just keep talking to me, ok? Put pressure on it and don’t fall asleep. You hear me?”

“Javi-“

“I’m fucking serious, hermosa. You hear me? You better keep your damn eyes open long enough so I can look at them when we get there, and you make some stupid wise crack about all this.”

A car door slammed. Voices rang out over the line. You could hear an engine start. 

“Javi... I love you... I really do...”

“Y/N? Y/N?”

His voice sounded desperate, terrified even, as you faded away, failing to reply. You simply felt the edges of your vision beginning to dim and the inevitable pull of sleep tugging you toward an abyss you knew there would be no coming back from. 

You couldn’t fight it any longer.

A single tear trickled down your cheek and you felt the phone drop from your hand onto the cold concrete beneath you. 

“I’m sorry.”

——— 

“-y tienes suerte de que te quiera mucho. Odio los hospitales. este lugar es jodidamente horrible. No puedo dejarte aquí solo. no cuando te vas a despertar en cualquier momento. ¿Me escuchas? Tú vas a-“

The voices were coming in waves, washing over you and disappearing just as quickly. 

It was hard to try and hold on to, even if you wanted to. This voice in particular was soft and tempting, familiar even... Coaxing you in over and over every time you slipped back into the darkness that was so warm and soft. 

You’d always been a deep sleeper, slamming your alarm harder than necessary whenever it tried to wake you. 

Now was the same... even if you knew it shouldn’t be. Even if you felt odd, like you were supposed to be somewhere and you’d forgotten... 

But where?

“She should have woken by now-“

“Javi, calm down. She’s gonna be fine. The doctor said so. She just needs to rest. Have a little faith in her. She’s tough. She’ll pull through this.”

“But if she doesn’t ... Steve, I can’t...”

“Hey. Look at me, Peña. It’s gonna be alright. Now come on. Connie said she’d bring some clothes for you...”

There they were. The voices again. 

Somehow, you knew that they were trying to pull you back to wherever you were supposed to be. 

To the aching you felt. To the mechanical beeping you could hear. To the painfully bright lights hovering overhead. 

To the weight and warmth of someone’s hand holding yours. 

To the familiar face pressed against the bed as he slept, holding you hand tightly as if scared to let you go. 

“Javi?” you croaked. 

Like that, he was awake. 

You worried he’d have whiplash, he sat up so fast, eyes wide in disbelief as he realised you were awake. “Y/N? Oh, thank God!” 

“Y/N?”

“Steve?” you rasped, noticing your other partner as he leapt out of his chair in the corner of the room. The relief was clear as he smiled and hurried to the door. 

“Thank god. I’m gonna grab a nurse.” 

“Ok.” You smiled and turned to Javier who was still holding your hand tight, watching you with bloodshot eyes. “What... how long was I-?”

“Three days,” he whispered. “You really scared me there for a second, hermosa. You... you lost so much blood and they weren’t sure you were gonna make it.” 

“I’m sorry.”

The sight of tears in his eyes was more painful than the bullet hole that was currently sending white hot agony shooting through your side. You’d never seen Javi so torn up before. Never. The worst was when he’d sit silently and smoke for hours without even moving. 

As much as you hated that, you’d take that any day over this. Knowing you were the cause. 

“No. Don’t be,” he dismissed swiftly. “I mean yeah, I wanna shoot you myself for running off and pulling a dumb fucking stunt like that but I get it... I really do. I’d have done the same thing. Hell, I have done the same thing. I just wish you’d asked me to come. Or even Murphy. We would have.”

“The ambassador had his eye on you after the raid this week,” you protested weakly, wincing at the pain in your side as you tried to sit up. “I couldn’t risk you or Murphy or your jobs like that.” 

“Fuck our jobs.”

“Javi -“

“No, hermosa. Listen. I mean this. You come first, understood? Always,” Javi snarled, kissing the back of your hand. “I love you and I mean that. Life isn’t worth it without you. This job means shit all without you. You come first? Ok. Always. Seeing you lying there with all the blood on you... it made me realise a few things and this is one of them. I don’t want a life or a future without you in it.” 

You couldn’t help it as the tears began to flow again, your heart swelling with love for the man in front of you. You couldn’t help but reach out and brush your fingers through his hair as you’d done so many nights before. 

“I love you too, Javier Peña.”

“Good. Remember that when Steve gets back and starts ripping into your ass,” Javier teased, lightening up now that your were awake and talking again. “I won’t be able to save you then, carino. Sorry. Sicarios are one thing, but Murphy? He’s almost as terrifying as Connie.”

Oh fuck. You’d forgotten about Connie. Oh she was gonna kill you. Big time. 

That woman was the biggest mother hen you’d met in your entire life. She’d also probably have your ass on house arrest for the rest of your life after this stunt. 

“Shit,” you whined, dropping back against the pillows. “It was good while it lasted.”

“And good thing we get to do it all again another time,” he hummed. “Just ... not for a while, ok? Not until you’re on your feet.” 

“You mean, not until Connie says so?”

Javi didn’t even flinch as he nodded, deadly serious. “Yep. 100 percent.”

------

Translation: “and you are lucky i love you so much. i hate hospitals. this place is fucking horrid. i cant leave you here alone. not when you are going to wake up any minute now. you hear me? you are going to-”

[eirikaanemo]

A Pitch Perfect Pair

Fair Warning: This is probably not going to be an often occurrence, but I may sometimes write something myself instead of just reblogging other people’s majestic work.

I do this daily now.

No Warnings, just potentially poorly written fluffy

Feedback and constructive criticism are very, very welcome!

Venti x GN!Reader

1.2k Words

Continue below the cut

After becoming friends with Venti, he has played many songs for you. From quick to slow, warm to cold, lively to hollow, every song was different, unique, and wonderful. In fact, he’d played so many songs for you that you started feeling guilty. He’s done so much and it feels like all you’ve been doing is sitting around doing nothing. And so you decided that you would play him a song for once!

It took some searching through the attic storage but you did eventually find your old flute in its case. You had made many good memories with the instrument. Your mother had wanted all her children to learn how to play music, so everyone learned to play something. There would be family nights where all you did was play music together. But those warm and happy days ended when your mother passed away suddenly in an accident. There was a strange sort of nostalgia and a wave of grief that came with handling your beloved flute again.

Hoping it would help you avoid the impending emotional breakdown, you took the whole case and set out for Windrise. You had made many good memories there that might help balance out the emotions that suddenly plagued your mind. Once you reached your destination you sat down, unpacked your instrument, and started cleaning and tuning it. The time it spent in storage had not been kind to it and it took longer than you’d expected to get it ready. But finally you were able to warm up.

From there you fell back on your memories to decide what you’d play. You closed your eyes and got lost in the melodies of days gone by, your emotions imbued in every note that played so high and clear. Sure, your technique was nowhere near where it used to be. But your fingerings and tunes were true to memory. Eventually you started to play your favorite song, one your Mom had called “Song of the Heart”. 

The song started slow and soft, gently speeding up. It then became a cheery tune that bubbled along from one note to the next. From there it calmed to a deeper tone, more solemn and contemplative. And it then returned to the soft and slow beginning before ending on a joyful and satisfying note. You took a moment to rest and appreciate the silence of the area around you.

Then the clapping started. 

Startled, you fumbled and almost dropped your flute. After making sure that you weren’t actually going to drop your instrument you turned to see who it was. There stood Venti, with just the biggest smile on his face. He was clapping so fast that part of you started to become a little concerned for his hands, but the rest of you was too busy being horribly embarrassed to care.

“That was amazing,” he exclaimed, “I had no idea you could play the flute so well!” 

If your face wasn’t already red, it was now. “Where did you come from?” You asked. He pointed at Vanessa’s tree, around 100 yards away. “I was sitting in the tree. It’s one of my favorite places, remember?” “Oh yeah, I forgot,” you explained. “But even then, how did you hear me play from clear over there! I wasn’t all that loud.” He gave a secretive little smile, “I have my ways.” You raised an eyebrow, but let it go.

“Anyway, it wasn’t all that good, it’s been a while since I’ve played and I’m pretty out of practice. I was hoping to surprise you later but I guess that didn’t work out very well.” Your foot kicked at the dirt a little bit as you avoided eye contact. Not only had someone overheard you, but it was Venti, your friend and secret crush, who also happened to be a bard. 

Venti just laughed. “If that was you playing out of practice then I can’t wait to hear what it’s like when you’ve polished your skills some! It’s been a while since I’ve heard someone play the flute so well! Oh! Maybe we could practice together and play some duets! Everyone would love that!”

Now that you thought about it, that would be kind of fun. And spending time practicing playing instruments with your crush? Score! “I’d love that,” you admitted, an elated feeling spreading from your stomach butterflies to your thumping heart. “My initial intention was simply to play some music for you because you’ve always played so much music for me. I’ve felt kind of bad, like I’ve been taking advantage of you or something. I figured this would be a way I could pay you back for that in some measure, but playing duets with you sounds like fun too!” 

Venti looked at you, his head tilted a little and jaw slackened in surprise. “You never owed me anything for those songs. I played them for you because I wanted to. As a bard, I don’t make a lot of money. So this has been my way of giving back to you for all of the times you let me stay over and bring me food. You’ve done more for me than you probably think.” 

He walked over and sat next to you, just a few inches away. You rested your flute on your lap and turned towards him. At that moment he was staring up into the sky with a shy smile on his face, so unlike his usual grins. The movement of his braids back and forth reminded you that it was windy, which reminded you that it was cold. It was getting late and you’d neglected to grab a jacket, thinking that you’d be back soon.

He must have noticed you were getting cold, because he shrugged off his cape and wrapped it around you. “You should’ve brought a jacket, you know it gets cold here,” he scolded gently. You looked up at him, eyes wide with surprise at his sudden act. The flush that had finally fled your cheeks started returning with a vengeance. And for the first time you noticed that his cheeks were rather flushed themselves.

Both of you fell silent, simply looking at each other. His eyes were thoughtful and a soft smile remained on his face. The silence was broken as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders and scooted a little closer. “You know,” he murmured, “there’s another reason for why I’ve been playing music for you.”

“Oh? And what reason might that be?” You asked. “Well,” he responded, “we’ve been friends for a while but recently I’ve started feeling something more for you, about you. There’s a lot I haven’t told you, that I’m not ready to tell you, but if you’re willing I’d like to give us a try.”

Your heart jumped to your throat and you swallowed, trying to gather courage. “Yeah,” you whispered, “I think I’d like that.” You tilted your forehead forwards to touch his, reaching up to cup his cheek. “I think I’d really, really like that.”

He smiled and gave you a quick kiss, much too quick for your liking. Your disappointment must have been obvious because he chuckled. “I think we’ll have plenty of time for more once we start practicing our duets, yes?” “Yes,” you agreed, “let’s be sure to practice lots. Maybe they’ll even call us a ‘pitch perfect pair’.” You laugh a bit at the thought.

“If that’s what you’d like,” he said gently, “then pitch perfect we shall be.”

[moonknightly]

eyes on me : fo! poe dameron x reader

Word Count: 2.9k

Excerpt: “But when he’d looked at you with those dark eyes and that crooked grin, when he’d sauntered up to you and simply pointed at the ground with the confidence in knowing you’d obey his orders? You wanted him to ruin you in a different way.”

Warnings: Consensual non-consent!! Rough blowjobs, gunplay, violence. Pre-established scene gone slightly wrong, but the aftercare is there. This fic is definitely not for everybody so pleeeeease do not read it if you aren’t absolutely 100% comfortable doing so. Stay safe babies. 

The smell of smoke filled your lungs, but you didn’t cough. Ash and dust clouded your vision, but you didn’t dare rub your eyes. Your knees ached, bloodied and cut open from the gravel underneath you, but you didn’t dream of wincing or readjusting. You couldn’t remember how long you had been down on them, your eyes glued to the toes of his boots as he stood in front of you. You couldn’t remember the last time he moved or the last time he spoke.

But you did remember his words. They were playing over and over again in your mind, filling your stomach with nerves and anxiety.

Stay still.

Stay absolutely still, or he’d make you.

You weren’t exactly sure if his words were only an innuendo, or if he quite literally meant them.

If Poe Dameron’s reputation rang true, it was probably a mixture of both — something sinister yet arousing all wrapped into one.

He was lethal. Powerful. Everything you feared yet something you’d always admired. Even now as he stood before you, his presence completely threatening and formidable, you still weren’t convinced that the way your stomach flipped was entirely bad. You almost thought you had butterflies.

Lethal. Powerful. Threatening. Formidable.

It didn’t make any sense to you, how a man could be all of these things yet still have you clenching your thighs.

He’d done something so terrible, yet that didn’t seem to register in your mind.

He had stormed your village, him and his strongest fleet of ‘troopers, setting fire to everything in his path. Destroying your home. Killing your loved ones, the blood still on his hands, settling between the cracks and the lines, staining. He’d ruined everything, everything.

But when he’d looked at you with those dark eyes and that crooked grin, when he’d sauntered up to you and simply pointed at the ground with the confidence in knowing you’d obey his orders?

You wanted him to ruin you in a different way.

You wanted him to ruin you, and simply giving into him just wasn’t enough, just wouldn’t do it. You wanted to fight him, you wanted him to overpower you and take what he wanted. You wanted him to show you that power of his, up close and personal, raw and untamed.

He’d seen it in your eyes, right before you took off running. He’d seen that lust and the desire and fuck, he thought he liked that more than if you’d just submitted to him.

And you were beyond into it, even more than you thought you would be as you listened to his boots pounding the stone ground just a few feet behind you, always right on your heel.

Maybe it was the thrill of the chase, or maybe it was how his hands always reached out to grab you but he’d let you slip away just so he could catch you again. Maybe it was the borderline insane laugh that flew from his lips when he finally tackled you, when he wrestled you to the ground as you fought with all of your energy until you had nothing left to give, your exhaustion finally allowing him to pull you into the position you were currently in. Maybe it was the blaster he had pressed to your forehead, the cold metal a shocking contrast against your hot skin.

He was holding it so still. His hand never twitched, fingers never needing to be repositioned as they curled around the handle, as his index hovered right over the trigger. His lack of movement showed nothing but discipline and control, but also assurance that yes, he would pull that trigger without so much as a second thought if you didn’t do exactly as he asked of you. It was cocky, confident, almost arrogant, and it had you trembling.

It was exactly what you wanted.

And you wanted to move. You wanted to shift your weight off of your knees, but you weren’t willing to risk it even though you knew he wouldn’t really shoot, not now. You wished you had the discipline that he had, because you were so close to wavering and the thought terrified you as you immersed yourself in your little game with him.

The pressure and the coolness of the blaster finally faded from your skin, and you finally let your chest heave with a sigh of relief, the sound shaky and desperate through your parted lips. It made Poe smirk, though you didn’t glance up at him to be able to know that.

You could just feel it.

And just as you were getting used to the feeling of not having a deadly, terrifying weapon on you, you heard a soft click, and glanced towards where the blaster was being held by his side.

The damn safety had been on the entire time.

And the fact that he had just turned it off sent a chill down your spine, panic running through your veins, turning your entire body to ice. If you had been still before, now you were frozen.

He laughed again.

“Sweetheart, I told you, you don’t have a thing to worry about as long as you do exactly what I fuckin’ say. Right?”

You didn’t answer, still not trusting yourself to move or speak, because he really hadn’t given you permission to, had he?

But maybe you had been wrong, because he tsked under his breath, and the familiar cold metal of his weapon met your still parted lips, pushing until the tip of the blaster was resting against your tongue, your lips loosely around the barrel.

You felt tears prick at your eyes, threatening to spill over, and the noise that flew from his mouth had the audacity to sound almost concerned.

Poe took a step closer to you, his body no longer angled, hips now directly in front of your face, eyelevel. He brought the end of the blaster to sit directly in front of his crotch, and your eyes widened as the full implication of what he wanted you to do suddenly hit.

“Look at me.”

You didn’t hesitate in following his command, your eyes fluttering up to meet his as your cheeks burned.

He pushed the blaster further between your lips, making you take it, stopping just short of the spot that would make you gag, as if he had been in your mouth before to know that.

“You’re going to suck on this blaster and pretend it’s my cock,” he started, voice low, dripping with something sensual yet dangerous all in one. “And then I’ll let you go, no strings attached. Sound like a deal darling?”

You whimpered around the blaster, more tears springing to your eyes at the same moment you felt another rush of wetness flood between your legs. You stretched your lips further around the blaster, forcing yourself to hold eye contact with him as you experimentally bobbed your head. You ignored it when the sharp edge of the sight scraped the roof of your mouth.

“That’s it,” he praised, weaving his free hand into your hair, his grip loose but still tight enough to command your attention.

You weren’t expecting him to shove the blaster further into your mouth, the tip pressing right against the back of your throat as he held you firmly there, not allowing you to move even a centimeter backwards.

And you choked, the tears you’d been holding back now freely streaming down your face as you struggled to breathe, but you kept your eyes locked on his, knowing he was getting off on seeing you in such a compromised state. And just when you thought he was finally going to relent, when he pulled back just enough for you to finally inhale again, he bucked his hips forward, sending the weapon right back to where it had been before, only with more force.

Your eyes immediately slammed shut, and Poe didn’t like that at all if the sharp smack to your cheek was anything to go by.

“Eyes on me sweetheart.”

You whimpered again, still trying to get a grip on your gag reflex, but you followed his directions anyways, afraid of what would happen if you disobeyed.

His bottom lip was pulled gently between his teeth, his eyes hard and cold and full of lust, bringing another round of butterflies back to the pit of your stomach that only intensified the longer he stared. He pulled back again, just long enough for you take a deep breath or two before he started to fuck your face with his blaster, his eyes locked onto your lips and the way they parted and stretched.

You wondered if he’d stretch your mouth further.  

You weren’t sure how much time passed when he finally ripped the blaster from your mouth, not bothering to wipe it off as he stuck it back into his waistband after twisting it around in his hand to examine it.

Your breathing was ragged, your throat burned like it never had before, and the satisfied smirk on Poe’s face told you that he knew it too. He liked the fact that you were going to struggle with the soreness for a few days, he liked the fact that you were suffering for him and his pleasure.

You liked it too.

But neither of you were still entirely satisfied.

“Unzip my pants, and take out my cock.”

Your eyes widened in mock shock to offplay the way your mouth started to water. “But you said-”

“Haven’t you learned that people lie sweetheart?” he chuckled lowly, his grip in your hair tightening as he used it for leverage to pull you to him, your nose hitting the front of his pants. “Does this look like something I’m just gonna take care of myself?”

A third whimper.

“Now unzip my pants, take out my cock, and let me fuck that filthy little mouth.”

You hesitated, wanting to see how far you could push him. He wasn’t patient, by any means of the word, and he growled after only a few seconds, his free hand moved to his hip, ripping his blaster back out and setting it almost lazily against your temple.

That fear came rushing back, and your stomach flipped again, but this time you were positive that it was in a way that you liked. You quickly obliged, fumbling just a little with his belt and the fasteners on his pants, your hands trembling like they had been before.

You hoped he didn’t plan on making you take all of him, because you had absolutely no idea how you would manage to do that.

He smeared his tip along your slightly parted lips, and you couldn’t pretend to fight your desire anymore. Your tongue immediately darted out to lick at the drop of precome that was hanging from your top lip, and Poe moaned at the sight, pushing himself further between your lips, definitely stretching them further than his blaster had.

And you really started to like it.

You liked the way his breathing hitched when you swirled your tongue around him, and you liked the way his hand in your hair remained tight, using it to guide you along his length. You liked the way you were throbbing between your legs just from the soft grunts and small growls flying from his mouth.

You liked the fact that you were making a First Order captain feel good, that you were making him fall apart and lose his composure.

His hips started to thrust into your mouth at a relentless pace, the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat much like the blaster had, and the tears started streaming again. Poe groaned.

And then your nose was suddenly pressed against his pelvic bone, and he was so far down your throat you weren’t exactly sure how he had gotten there.

“Swallow around my dick.”

You obeyed.

He held you there for a long moment, relishing in the sound of you gagging around him, loving the warm and wet feeling of your mouth taking his cock. He bucked his hips once, and you were just starting to see black around the sides of your vision when he pulled himself out.

You blinked rapidly, coughing and spluttering, spit trickling down your chin.

And Poe only laughed, tucking his still hard cock back into his pants, but guiding your hands back to his belt, expecting you to fasten it for him.

You were so entirely confused, and for a second, you thought you hadn’t been doing as good a job as you thought. Your cheeks burned as you glanced down at your hands, still on your knees, a blaster still aimed at your head and you were so entirely embarrassed enough as it was, knowing you shouldn’t have enjoyed the situation that just played out, but not being able to satisfy him? That only made the shame worse.

“Get up, come on,” he sighed suddenly, breaking you from your thoughts. “You’re coming with me.”

You didn’t react first, didn’t listen to his command immediately. You just stared at a random spot on the ground with a vacant look in your eye, unable to make yourself move. You heard him shift above you and your eyes immediately slammed shut, but instead of pressing his blaster back into your temple like you half expected him to, he did something you weren’t expecting at all.

Poe fell to his knees in front of you, his hands moving to cup your cheeks. You instinctively flinched away, your body starting to shake again before you had a chance to even try and hide how afraid you actually were.

“Darling? Hey, hey look at me. It’s over, we’re done. You’re safe.”

All you could do was whimper and shake your head in response, your breathing quickly becoming rapid. You tried to pull away from him, and there was just a little bit of hesitancy before he let you go.

“Baby,” he mumbled, his eyebrows furrowing though your eyes were still closed, you didn’t catch it. “Color?”

He knew his question was redundant. It was obvious what your answer would be, he knew it already, but he felt the need to ask anyways.

“Red.”

You hated that it was red.

You’d been fine. You’d been so completely in the green, so turned on and ready for more until suddenly you weren’t, until you’d become so lost in the scene you started to believe it was real and not something you and your Captain had set up so long ago.

But that was a good sign, the fact that you were able to pinpoint exactly where it had gone wrong, that you were slipping back into reality so quickly. Poe had caught you at a good time, he’d gotten to you before you spiraled too deep.

“Can I touch you?” he asked softly, silently cursing at himself for not asking the first time. “Will you let me carry you back to the ship princess?”

You didn’t give him an answer. Instead you ran your hands across your face and sighed, shaking your head. “I’m sorry, I know we talked about this and everything.”

It’d been your idea actually, it was your fantasy to be chased by a First Order Captain. It was something you’d thought about for so long now, and this mission just proved to be the perfect opportunity to try it out.

So why couldn’t you handle it?

You glanced up when you heard Poe stand again, his boots crushing the loose gravel beneath his feet. “Darling you have nothing to be sorry for.”

“But-”

“No. You know you can back out at any time.”

Poe took a step closer, and this time, you didn’t flinch away. He reached out his hand, careful not to move too fast and accidentally spook you. You took it and let him help you to your feet.

“I know.”

“But do you?”

You nodded, but Poe wasn’t entirely convinced. Still, he didn’t push it. That was a conversation you could have later, once you were rested up and feeling more like yourself. His main goal right then was just to take care of you.

“Can I carry you?” he asked again, watching your face closely so he could see if your emotions matched your words.

This time you nodded, and this time he was satisfied with what he saw. He was quick to lift you into his arms and hold you against his chest, and the familiar warmth of his body was an instant comfort to you.

He walked slowly, through desolate streets and smoking buildings, and the whole time he never let his eyes stray away from yours.

That. That was what you needed more than anything, those stupid brown eyes.

Lethal. Powerful. Threatening. Formidable.

Soft only for you. Warm. Home.

Those stupid brown eyes that served as a gentle reminder that he’d never hurt you, he’d never let anyone lay a finger on you.

“Eyes on me sweetheart.

“Eyes on me.”

[x0401x]

Jeweler Richard Fanbook Short Story #26

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Opera-phile

I had a hobby that I couldn’t tell anyone about. People like me were no rare breed.

Amongst the hobbies I had heard about from my friends until now, the one that made me think “this might be a bit hard to tell someone” the most was that keeping ice cream lids when they finished eating it. They said they would write down the date on each lid and store them in one of those clear files sold at 100-yen shops. They could only eat ice cream on special days when they were little, and they still couldn’t get over the habit of that time. The face of the person who had told me about this seemed simply satisfied in some way. Regardless, this may not have been something so difficult to say because it was revealed at a drinking party.

Now. Bringing the topic back to me.

If you were living alone in a foreign land called Sri Lanka, you could do whatever you wanted. I could get up at any time, eat whatever I felt like, study the things I enjoyed and go wherever I wanted with my Three-Wheeler. I didn’t have much, but the prices were cheap. My culinary repertoire was also noticeably increasing. Even if I danced alone in my room, no one would be watching. No, my dear dog ​​Jirou would stare at me with a bit of a strange look, but there were times when he’d eventually jump up and down and start dancing with me. Even if I listened to music at a loud volume, the same went for my neighbors.

Therefore, I was now thinking that maybe my stopper had come off a little.

I had bought the CD in Colombo, the real capital of Sri Lanka. As one would expect of the biggest shop in the country, they sold a lot of things that were unlikely to be available in Kandy.

The jacket featured a black-haired woman with a spellbound face, both of her arms outstretched. It was an opera CD with twelve songs.

I went back and forth in my room, shouting, “ah~, ah~”. What an opera was? No, I did know. It was traditional singing style – something like a musical, in which singers such as tenor, paritone, soprano and alto would perform along with a play. But something about them that diverged a bit from musicals was that the words used were old, the melodies weren’t excitable, and they were mainly either Italian or French, I believed.

I had no choice but admit it at this point. I liked opera.

Nakata Seigi had the words “I’m in love with opera” floating about in his head. I was driven by an urge to scream “gyaaah” and make said words disappear, but on the CD jacket, Maria Callas was making a spellbound face as usual, and that made me happy. I had purchased this CD after much hesitation over buying this or buying that. There was no way I wouldn’t be happy about it. Still...

Somewhere in my head, I recognized this as something embarrassing.

My dear boss was always telling me to think rationally at such times. He told me that whenever I thought my mind was moving in absurd ways, it always happened that there was some sort of timid development in me, which I either hadn’t noticed or, even if I did notice it, I’d ignore it – but once I understood it, it would stop being absurd.

Why would opera be embarrassing in the first place?

How I had come to like opera? The trigger was the radio. When I was staying at a hotel for a while back in Tokyo, I tended to feel down because I had nothing to do other than study, so I’d sometimes listen to the radio broadcast at the hotel while devoting myself to physics and English.

The singing voice I heard at that time was – how should I put it? – tremendously wonderful.

I couldn’t think that it was the voice of someone from the same world as myself. Someone was singing in a place just a few ways away, and as I listened to it, my body felt like my body was airily floating up – it was that kind of voice. I didn’t have any preferences for either male or female, and if anything, I liked both. The title of the song being streamed was written in the hotel’s guidebook, so I went to a video streaming site and searched for the same song by other singers and the songs that came before and after said piece. Faust. Madama Butterfly. Otello. Rigoletto. The Magic Flute. Don Giovanni. Whenever an opera song was used on a TV show, i became able to at least tell which prelude it was from.

And this passion hadn’t cooled down even now that some time had passed since then.

I walked around the room again, shouting, “Uuuh, uuuh”. Jirou energetically followed me from behind. It was almost as if he meant to say, “It’s fun to go a stroll even inside a room, huh, owner?”. Sorry but it’s not like I’m taking you on a walk, I thought, yet Jirou couldn’t care less, letting out a sweet voice as I held him up and rocked him, and then running off to the yard as if he had gotten excited. Just as I felt relieved, thinking about what a cute fella he was, I found myself imagining something. I could see myself at the drinking party, talking about how I liked opera. The reaction I pictured was an explosion of laughter.

“‘Opera’, you say. What’s up with that? It’s that thing where fat people raise their voices like crazy, right? You like that? Why? No way, Nakata, didn’t you just want to have a rich people hobby just ‘cause you’ve well-off these days? Like, those that feel like you’re superior. That’s exactly what opera is. Okay, I get it, but that ain’t very interesting, so how about we change the topic?”

It gave me chills.

I wasn’t creeped out by how people might talk about my hobbies. However, it was painful to have the whole genre of opera, which had saved me back when I was put in a spot like a light reaching out from the sky, be judged by people who didn’t even know the difference between Callas and Pavarotti and not be able to defend them. I had to protect what was important to me. Or else, it would get damaged. I wasn’t referring to the long-standing form of art that had been cultivated for hundreds of years. I meant my own heart. That was painful to me.

Yeah, I was somewhat aware that this wasn’t an “embarrassment”. But I was scared.

I was low-key terrified of having people pointing their fingers at me from behind with words such as “eccentric”, “weirdo” or “pretentious” for having a preference that was different from other people’s – and something that I seriously liked, no less.

With a deep breath, I took the CD’s vinyl cover. Unlike Japanese CDs, there was none of those convenient little ears that made the cover come off when you pulled it. I slowly cut it with a pair of scissors, set it on a nostalgic stereo radio and played it while referring to the table of track numbers on the backside.

Just from the intro, I already knew who was singing and what song it was.

Maria Callas’s “Casta Diva”. It was a song from an opera called “Norma”, and the meaning of it was “chaste goddess”.

What it made me reminisce to was a seriously horrible time, when I had to prepare for my death to a certain extent. Whenever this song played in the hotel’s radio program, which repeated itself over and over, this song would connect me with paradise, telling me that I didn’t need to worry about trivial matters, so I was able to leave it all aside and relax. It was that kind of song. Without a doubt, my biggest and best saver was that beautiful jeweler, but from the sidelines, opera had definitely helped me keep my sanity.

That was amazing.

I was grateful from the bottom of my heart that this form of art, which couldn’t be classified as mainstream at all in Japan and probably overseas as well, had maintained its thread of life across the centuries. It had saved me. Would the CD sales be of any help to it? Thankfully, I had some money to spend and was probably able to buy a set of all-track CDs per month. Would that be a form of repayment of any kind? It would be great if so, I thought wholeheartedly.

“Casta Diva” wasn’t too long a piece. With a voice that sounded like it was vanishing, the song ended. For whatever reason, it made me feel like crying, no matter how many times I had listened to it. It was too beautiful. It was an impossible speculation, but if Richard turned into a song, I felt that his form would change into something very close to this one.

Once I finished listening to the track, the “aaah”s and “uuuh”s had disappeared from my head. I liked opera. Opera turned into my strength. So I wanted to cherish it.

Even if someone ridiculed me for it, the problem was with the person, not with me or with opera. And my precious, beautiful shopkeeper had stated that “no discriminating other people based on their preferences” was one of the main principles of Etranger. What was I going to do by discriminating myself?

I was going to keep buying opera CDs from now on too, I swore proudly to my heart, yet secretly decided not to write about it in my blog or talk to Richard about it. Not because it was embarrassing. But rather because I had the gut feeling that I couldn’t predict what would happen in the end if I told him.

On that day, I was busy with preparations for cooking. First Saul-san, and then Richard would come to Kandy to hear the reports about the progress of my studies. It was also like a test. But I hadn’t studied half-assedly enough to chicken out at that. Above all, thanks to the negotiations in Ratnapura, I was conscious that my eyes were well-trained, if I could say so myself.

If it didn’t go well even with this, that was fine. I was happy to find new challenges. Lots of things became easier once I started feeling that studying was fun.

And since they were coming over, they wouldn’t get angry if I prepared a bit of a feast. More than anything, being able to cook a few people’s share in this house had me overjoyed. After all, I was basically living alone, so just how many times had I found delicious-looking and cheap food but had to tearfully give up because I wasn’t sure if I could eat it all by myself?

Being surrounded by things that made you happy was extremely good for the heart.

Deciding to go for an additional blow, I set the CD in the radio. A long aria began at the end of the first opus of all songs. It was a French opera called “La Fille du Régiment”, and being fond of this one had greatly helped me when I was studying French.

The man who started to sing that he was going to marry the army was a world-renowned tenor.

In the beginning, the man sang that he was going to do meritorious deeds in the army, cheered on by his companions. Since I had been listening to the words ever since back when I could only hear them as katakana spelling, my mouth moved without any reference. Of course, my voice didn’t sound like that of a tenor, but it had the same gist as somehow trying to sing in the range of a singer from some music show. Just that was fun enough.

A fish pie was baking in the oven. There were three types of curry in the smaller pots. My Nakata-style sliced veggies pickled in soy sauce, which were a mixture of chopped coconut sambal and dried fruits, were lined up on a cutting board, and the fresh fruits that I planned to make into mixed juice were all completely ready. The only thing I had left to do was preparing watalappan for dessert. It had to chill in the fridge for a while, so it was necessary to make it in advance. However, since it was my third time making it, I had the procedure memorized. No worries.

The tenor raised his voice amidst joy. The man who sang, “Ah, I’m going, I’m going to marry the army” didn’t like the army in particular, he was just in love with the abandoned girl that all the men from the regiment he was enlisted in were raising together.

The key switched to waltz. The true value of the tenor would ensue from that point onward.

The oven beeped, indicating that the pie had finished baking. With light steps, put on my gloves, took out the whole iron plate with the pie on it and gently slid it into a white porcelain plate.

A series of splendid high Cs. This referred to when the tenor raised their voice a great deal. If the composer was wonderful in reproducing the feelings of happiness into the music so keenly, then so was the singer who sang them so faithfully, I believed. The feeling of excitement turned into the melody just the way it was.

I arranged the dishes on the table and peeled the fruits. The high Cs continued one after another. I opened a can of coconut milk and mixed the contents with nut paste. The song was approaching the end. “What a fate, what a fate,” he sang, sounding merry. The highest note was near.

The song was coming to a close while celebrating happiness with the highest note. The feelings of the singer weren’t recorded in the CD, but I could hear them as comfortably as could be.

It wasn’t nearly high enough, but I sang along at a fairly loud volume.

At the same time as the song finished with a flashy grace note, I lightly kicked the open lid of the oven. It closed up neatly. With this, everything was all set. I was going to put away the CD set before the guests arrived.

Or so I had planned.

After the peak of my excitement, I noticed that someone was standing outside the window. He hadn’t come in from the front door. Hence the chime didn’t ring.

“Bravo, bravissimo.” A beautiful man wearing a white shirt and sunglasses, said glasses charmingly pushed up above his forehead, was smiling while applauding at my stiffened self.

The test was terrible that day. I didn’t think there was any issue with the contents of my answers. However, since I was stuttering so much, Saul, my mentor who was so picky about manner of speech as well as the contents of it, pointed out that I should “act more dignified”. I knew that better than anyone. There was too much noise interference in my head with things such as, “Why did I put opera on in such high spirits? What did he think of me now? As I thought, does he think that this hobby doesn’t suit me? No, that’s definitely impossible when it comes to my teacher, so I have to take control of my self-consciousness”.

And so, this is a story that happened more than half a year after that. Something that took place in Sri Lanka in May.

“Eh?”

“Happy birthday, Seigi. Here is a little present.”

“A bank deposit transfer certificate?”

“Good job reading it. That is from the USA.”

“USA...”

“There was a seat that you would probably like, so I purchased a year’s worth of it.”

“A year”? This wasn’t potato chips or cup noodles. What kind of seat was that? Was there a truck coming to deliver it? While thinking about such things, I continued reading the A4 paper, and when I got to half of it, I roared loudly. I let out a voice that sounded like a crushed frog, I believed.

The seat that Richard had given me was indeed a seat. But at a music theatre in America, which was likely the world’s most famous. It was a one-year membership card.

This was proof that “a seat will be reserved for you”. A seat just for me, for any performance, that I could use whenever I went there.

I felt lightheaded. Just how much had this “seat” cost him? What was he trying to do by giving something like this to someone who sat in swivel chairs sold at mass retailers? I did have such rational retorts in my head, but above that, I was so, so happy that I started jumping up and down. I could go to a theatre that I only knew about from CDs. Anytime, as long as I had the plane tickets. No matter who was singing.

“Can I really have this?!”

“Do you think I’m some sort of boorish lad who’d take back the treasure after making the other person happy?”

“No way! Uoooh, I’m too excited; that’s bad!”

“You are reacting like a dog again...”

“I’m gonna run in the yard for a bit!”

As I, with a messy katakana pronunciation, sang to myself the chorus part of the aria that had just finished while rolling around in the yard, Jirou ran over and mounted on me without restraint. “Owner, we’re going to play here, right? We’re going to play here, right? Come, let’s play,” he seemed to say, energetically wagging his tail. I was so happy that I hugged him and rolled about, but then I could see Richard laughing. The yard was on a slightly lower level than the house, so the house was wholly visible, so I didn’t think I was mistaken. He really was making a happy-looking face. This might have been my first time seeing that man laugh with such a child-like expression.

At that moment, something suddenly came to mind.

When Richard told me for the first time that he “likes pudding”, did he also think for a bit that it was embarrassing or wonder about what I was going to say? This man had thorough knowledge about the so-called “society”. There was no way that he hadn’t considered the possibility.

But he had told me about it.

Did I not say anything weird to him back then? “A man, liking pudding?” or “Why would a foreigner like a Japanese dessert?” It gave me the creeps. Back then, I didn’t have as much care as now regarding how to handle such circumstances. I just had words jumping out of my mouth like knives. This still applies even now, but I wanted to think it had gotten better, even if just a little.

Had I not said anything to him? Had I not hurt him? I didn’t have any way to confirm that now. If I apologized without knowing what I had said, it wouldn’t be a sincere apology.

But right now, Richard was looking at my happy self and smiling.

So I decided to stop thinking about these things. And from now on too, I would keep making heaps upon heaps of the things he liked.

I had to protect what was important to me by myself. But if I happened to notice something that mattered to someone who was dear to me, I wanted to cherish it too. I had no other choice.

After stroking Jirou, I went back to where Richard was and bowed to him again. He reciprocated the bow with a “you are welcome” and seemed about to start laughing again.

“That’s right, I was gonna make pudding. Wait just a bit more.”

“Is there anything I can help with?”

“You already got me a seat at the MET; I can’t go along with that flattery even as a joke. I’d be happy if you played with Jirou, though.”

“Then, I will take you up on those words.”

Rubbing my chest in relief, I went back to my room, patting my whole body to remove the dirt and dog hairs, and after washing my hands with soap, I returned to the kitchen.

By the looks of it, I was going to be able to listen to an opera in person one of these days – at least within a year’s time. Once I watched it live, all the curtains would close, right? For real? Was such a thing possible? Apparently yes. Hard to believe but it was true.

That man who was like an incarnation of the worldwide definition of “beauty”, and above that, who was a genius at pleasing me, was fooling around with my hybrid brown dog in the yard, illuminated by tropical sunshine. It seemed that the preparations for our feast would still take a while.

“What a wonderful day,” I hummed tentatively in French. A gorgeous tenor voice wouldn’t come out of my throat, but the things I liked would firmly support my heart nevertheless. Almost like a backbone for it. And there was someone supporting this backbone. Honestly, what a wonderful day. For now, I’d be making pudding. And share at least a little bit of this feeling.

[breanime]

Theoretically if rio's cute neighbour, the one that watched his son, was being harassed by an ex or just some creepy guy. What would rio do?

So you can find the first neighbor headcannon list here. Also, this headcannon list got long as hell... haha, sorry?

*gif not mine*

Rio had been out of town for the last week, handling business

He’d texted you to let you know he’d be back soon--

--partly to be a good neighbor, and partly cause he wanted to see you

The two of you weren’t dating, but there was definitely something between you

(sexual tension)

And Rio was eager to see where it would go

He walked down the hall to his apartment, his bag slung over his shoulder, glad to be back in his own space

Then he saw your door

The wood was cracked, as if someone had punched it or something, and Rio stopped dead in his tracks

He knocked on your door, eyebrows knitted

You answered with a bat in your hands

“Huh...” Rio said, eyes roaming your body--from your tense posture to the bat in your hands to the tired, exhausted look in your eyes. “... Rough week without me, mama?”

“Oh, Rio,” you sighed, and Rio watched your body relax, “Sorry. I was just--”

“Expecting someone else?” He asked, walking into your apartment. 

He dropped his bag at the foot of the couch and turned to you, frowning

Rio watched as you locked both locks on the door behind him; he’d been in your place about 100 times now, and he’d never seen you do that before

“Yeah, kind of...” You answered. “How was your trip?”

“Fine,” he answered, sticking his hands in his pockets, “but I don’t wanna talk about that right now. Let’s talk about you.” He titled his head. “What’s going on here?”

You sighed again, and Rio wanted to hold you. You were stressed, and he longed to fix it

“I’ve just...” You crossed your arms, hugging yourself. “I don’t want to bother you with it.”

Rio took a few steps forward, until he was in front of you. He eyed you seriously. Someone so beautiful, he thought, shouldn’t look so sad. Not when he was around to help. 

“Bother me,” he said softly, his voice firm but low

“Last year...” You began, looking down. “...I dated this guy, and he was just...” You shook your head. “He was an ass. We broke up, and I never heard from him again... till a week ago... The night before you left.”

Rio’s eyes narrowed; he remembered that night. He’d taken you out for drinks before his trip, spending the night smiling and laughing with you. He’d gotten a call in the middle of it, and when he came back to the table, he saw a man walking away. But you hadn’t said anything about it, and you seemed fine, so he didn’t ask about it.

“The guy from the restaurant...” Rio said, nodding to himself. “That’s your ex.”

“He saw us out, and when you stepped away, he came up to me--but all he did was say hi. He wasn’t weird or aggressive or anything,” you said back, “But then he... I guess he found out where I lived...”

“Yeah,” Rio licked his lips, “that his handy work on the door?”

“Yeah,” you nodded back, “Every day since that night, he’s been calling me nonstop and showing up here, pounding on the door. I called the cops, but they said there’s nothing they can do unless he actually hurts me, so--”

“I got you,” Rio said, grabbing his bag 

He turned to go, but you held onto his arm.

“What are you gonna do?” You asked, eyes wide.

He looked down at you

On one hand, he could lie to you, keep up the polite charade that he made his money the legal way, that his business was simply in “providing capital” like he’d told you once before. The two of you hadn’t ever explicitly discussed what he did, but Rio knew you knew his vague descriptions of his business were just that: pointedly vague

But on the other hand... he could tell you the truth. Maybe you’d be cool with it.

Or maybe you’d shy away and turn from him. 

Either way, he was going to handle this for you, but he couldn’t deny--

--he wanted you to be ok with it. With him. For some reason, as Rio looked down at you, he saw something special, something that made him feel protective of you, something beyond the lust and friendly affection he had for you

When he looked at you, he saw a partner

 “I’ma tell him that the next time he so much glances up at this apartment,” Rio answered evenly, “I’m gonna put a bullet between his eyes. And if he doesn’t like that, I’ll put him down then and there.”

“You... You’d do that for me?” You asked, pretty eyes wide

“I’d of had this handled already if you would’ve told me before,” he confessed, reaching out to cup your face in his hand, “but since I’m here now, I’ll handle it personally.” He leaned down, his mouth just inches from yours. Rio wanted to kiss you so badly, he felt the desire in every part of him with you so close. “Stay here,” he told you, “I’ll be back in a few hours.”

He didn’t move, though, and neither did you.

Your hand flexed on his bicep, wanting to bring him even closer. “Rio, I...thank you.”

He smirked. “Don’t thank me yet.” He leaned in closer, about to say something else

And then you kissed him

Rio had kissed a lot of women in his life (a lot...like a lot a lot...)

But never had a pair of lips felt so good against his own. 

Rio’s arms wrapped around you, and he silently marveled at how perfectly you fit against him. He titled his head, slipping his tongue into your mouth, and you moaned into him. 

Chuckling, Rio’s hands went to your waist, and he led you towards the couch

You took a hold of his collar and dragged him down onto the couch with you, your legs wrapping around his waist as he laid on top of you

“Baby,” he chuckled into your lips, “I gotta go.”

“I know,” you said back, grinning, “I just need a few more minutes...”

He laughed. “For what?” He asked, even as he dipped his head down to start kissing your neck. The little sounds you made when his lips ghosted against your skin were driving him wild. 

...the ex might have to wait a bit.

Rio was kissing your collarbones while lifting up your shirt when a loud band sounded behind him

You jumped, but Rio just turned lazily, one eyebrow raised

“It’s him,” you whispered, and when Rio looked down at you, he could see the fear in your eyes

This, he decided, would be the last time you would ever look like that

“Relax,” he said, his voice low and calm. He leaned down and kissed you sweetly, and he felt you relax under his touch. “I got this. Just stay here,  mi bonita chica.”

Rio got up, kissing the top of your head as you sat up, and reached down into his bag.

“Y/N,” the banging was louder now, “I’m not playing with you--open this damn door right now!”

Rio grinned--it would be his pleasure

Rio opened the door and leaned on the doorway, a lazy smirk on his face. “Hey,” he greeted the man, “you know this is a private residence?”

The man blinked, taking a step back, and Rio chuckled. He knew this type: big, loud, and bad--until someone badder came around. 

“Wh--what the hell are you doing here...?” The man asked, craning his neck to try to peek into the apartment. 

“Yo,” Rio stood up straight, shaking his head, “What you lookin’ for? Huh?” He stepped up, and your ex stepped back again. “Y/N?” He asked. “She ain’t your concern no more, homie. I am.”

“I--I don’t--”

“Oh,” Rio chuckled, “That’s right, I’m sorry. I haven’t introduced myself.” He whipped out his gun, pointing it directly at the guy’s paling face. “I’m Rio. I’m the man Y/N’s currently seeing, and she wanted me to let you know that this shit,” he waved the gun, the smile no longer on his face, and the man backed up into the wall, eyes wide with terror, “Is done with. You stop callin’, you stop comin’ around, and you definitely stop trying to intimidate her into talkin’ to you. Matter of fact,” Rio went on, “the next time you see her, you better get the fuck away, cause if I hear about you even breathing in the same space as her again,” he stepped up and pressed the golden gun into the guy’s forehead, “I can’t promise I’ll stay this controlled. Is that understood?”

The ex nodded, looking like a bobblehead with his huge eyes “I---”

“No no no,” Rio smiled, “don’t speak.” He glanced back at you, you were standing in front of the couch now, watching. “You got any cash on you?”

He nodded

“Great,” Rio said brightly, “let’s see it.”

The guy reached into his pocket and took out his wallet, handing it over to Rio

“Mm...” Rio eyed his ID, memorizing the name and address for later use. “This looks like just enough to cover the cost of repairing the door,” he said, taking out a wad of bills, “and a lil extra for emotional damage.”

Rio threw the wallet back at your ex, who caught it, eyes never leaving the gun in Rio’s hand

“Okay now...” Rio grinned. “Run.”

He didn’t have to say it twice, your ex scurried away so quickly, that he fell half-way down the hall and just crawled into the elevator. If Rio didn’t know any better, he’d say he smelt piss in the hall now...

Rio closed your door, tossing the gun--which was empty--onto his bag on the floor

He turned to you, laughing when you launched yourself into his arms

“Thank you,” you said, your head buried in his chest, “thank you, thank you, thank you--”

“I told you,” he said, smiling down at you, “I got you. And yo, I was thinkin’...” He held up the cash. “...why don’t you use this on some self-defense lessons, just for fun?”

“But what about the door?”

“Ah, baby,” he leaned down, kissing you, “that’s what we got a super for!”

*******************************************************************************************

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