#toko is so cute to me so I wanted to draw her for her birthday

[hyacinth-04]

Inktober 2022 pt. 2

[adelheidvonschicksal]

Gosh, the Hawks x intern! Reader sure made me tear up :(

Like imagine him regretting not being there for her and his baby girl from the start and trying to make up for it now 😭😭💖

I was going to imagine this, but I couldn't because I ended up writing 3000 words. 😭 I just love fictional babies so much and want them to be happy, okay? I left it open-ended, so I wouldn't betray the "kick his ass" gang. I'm a weak woman 🥺 I still don't know much about him other than what Wikipedia and memes tell me but here we go!

Part One | Part Two

Hawks doesn’t think you’ll ever let him in, not that he could blame you. Every time you see him, your expression hardens, pretty eyes narrow into a glare, nostrils flare, breathing heavy. His only bright light during your last exchange is that you wait three seconds before slamming the door in his face rather than the usual zero.

Oh, he’s definitely softening you up. Not.

It’s been a month now that he’s been at this, and he is starting to wonder if this entire thing is worth the headache. All he’s accomplished so far is bothering you with his requests to talk. Then, he remembers the little angel that you have with you and thinks it’s worth the headache.

At first, he had ignored your previous exchange that day at the park and the nagging feeling in the corner of his mind upon seeing the two of you. Until that same feeling started to weigh on his heart. He quickly realizes what those feelings were. Guilt and regret at not taking another path with the high schooler he so carelessly took advantage of and impregnated.

If he had, he could be annoying Endeavor about his cute little wife right about now.

Hawks feels a bit like Icarus flying too close to the sun and now sinking in a turbulent ocean of his own making. Instead of drowning, the world decides to throw him a lifeline as the receptionist patches a call through to him.

His heart jumps when he hears you on the other side, resistant but succumbed in your plea, “I need your help.”

The very next day you arrive at the agency, a small hand latched in your own as you stand in the middle of his office. You didn’t want to be here. The thought of being in the same place where your daughter was conceived with the same man who left you makes you antsy. You can’t believe you actually let Fumikage talk you into this.

You remember that phone conversation.

Your daughter’s quirk had been coming in full force, so fast you didn’t know how to handle it. You hoped that Tokoyami would have been able to help her control it since he trained with the very person she received her quirk from much longer than you had and that he was part avian himself.

“Please, Fumi. It’s getting worse,” you begged over the phone. “She accidentally hurt a few of the kids at school. No. No. They’re fine, some cuts and a little shook up, but fine. They won’t let her back in until she gets it under control though, so please.”

“I told you there’s not much else I can do. The best solution would be to go to the person with the same quirk.”

He’s right. He’s absolutely right, but you don’t want to rely on someone like that man especially now. What if he ended up hurting her?

“I don’t want to do that.”

“I know you don’t, but he’s been trying to contact you, right? So I'm sure he'd do it if you asked.”

“Yeah…” You growled. “I swear if he makes one smart-ass remark, I might kill him in front of her.”

“Remember it’s not for you. Although, I don’t think you could kill him even if you tried.”

“If we combined our strength…”

“No,” Tokoyami immediately shot down.

You sighed. “I’m only joking. Do you have the number to the agency still?”

Now you’re here, watching the very man who abandoned you kneel down to your daughter’s eye level. Hawks couldn’t believe he’s actually seeing her. It’s a bit exciting to see how much bigger she’s gotten in such a short time with big fat wings at her back holding way more feathers than she can probably deal with.

“So, this is the special girl,” he says. She shies away from him, hiding behind your leg for protection. “Come on out, Baby Bird, you don’t have to be scared of me.”

Slowly, she peeks from behind you, fingers still clutched in your pants leg, and Hawks smiles.

“There you are. Did your mommy tell you who I am?”

“You’re her and uncle Toko’s old teacher, and you’re going to help me control my quirk.”

“That’s right. You just turned five, right? That’s when a lot of quirks can get kind of hectic.”

“Yeah. I had a birthday party with Elsa last month.”

Hawks’ smile falters for a second as he thinks he doesn’t know exactly what day her birthday is. At least now he knows the month. Quickly, he’s back to normal to keep an air of happiness in the situation. “You know I know a lady that looks a bit like Elsa. She has ice powers like her too,” Hawks says, having grown a little closer to the number one hero's family as he tried to figure out what to do about his own family situation.

When her eyes widen, Hawks knows he has her hook, line, and sinker. She throws her initial shyness to the wind in exchange for excitement. “She does? Can I meet her?”

“I’m sure we could make that happen. If not, her son has an ice quirk, too. I’m sure he’d show you.”

The young girl smiles at him, but Hawks notices her vision drifting to something else. Cautiously, her tiny hand stretches out to him, making him nervous as to what she’s doing, before chubby fingers clutch around the edge of his wing, squeezing into his feathers. “They’re pretty,” she mumbles.

“Want one?” he asks, and she nods.

“This is my birthday present for you, don’t lose it,” he says, offering her a single long feather from the back of his wings. She clutches it to her chest tightly, a happy smile plastered on her face.

Then, you interrupt.

“Baby, mama has to run some errands, but she’ll come right back to pick you up when the clock says twelve. You remember how that looks like, right?”

“It’s a 1 and a 2,” she says, bringing up her hands to show you.

Hawks decides to walk you out as your daughter sits in his office chair, twirling around his feather in her hand. He isn’t sure what to say to you now that he has you near him. Should he thank you for bringing her? Or would that only serve to piss you off since it’s not like you wanted to do this by choice?

“Hawks,” you say, bringing him out his thoughts. “There’s one more thing before I go.”

“What is it?”

“Don’t tell her,” you order. “Don’t you dare tell her.”

His chest squeezes at that but he can understand why you wouldn’t want her to know that information when the two of you aren’t even on speaking terms outside this issue. He didn’t want to do anything to make the situation worse either, so he brings his fingers to his mouth and zips his pinched thumb and index finger across his lips. “I’ll make sure mine and anyone else’s lips are sealed if they want to keep their job,” he calmly reassures you, always calm and carefree so you wouldn’t think that your rejection is successfully deterring him.

From then on, you drop your daughter off at his office twice a week to get a better handle on her powers. You didn’t stay long aside from that, but Hawks likes the small moments when all three of you are in the same room together.

The hero can be thankful that at least one of his girls likes him. His Baby Bird quickly attached herself to him, always pattering after his footsteps like a shadow, and always asking if he’d hold her hand, a smile forming whenever he engulfed her smaller one. He even keeps his promise to let her see Rei, or Elsa as Baby Bird so passionately refers to her, now that the woman is out of the hospital.

He thinks that if that family can recover from what happened then his shouldn’t be much different as long as he keeps trying to put in the effort and not step on your toes too much.

It isn’t long before Baby Bird begins to get a hang of her powers. At least enough that she wouldn’t be hurting anyone at school. Hawks had hoped you would still allow him to train her past that point though, but you quickly told him that she wouldn’t be returning to the agency when she reached that point.

He was sad to hear it of course, but he didn’t want to cause what little progress he made to be broken even if he really wanted to see her fly at least a few inches before she left. She’s been getting into the habit of jumping instead of walking to practice like he used to do. Although, she resembles more of a bouncy frog than a bird, to be honest.

He watches, amused, as she bounces along next to him in the hallway.

“You’ve gotten good at that,” he compliments, drawing her attention upwards.

“I’ve been practicing lots at home, but I’m not that good yet. Will you teach me how to fly like you do tomorrow?” she asks.

“No, Baby Bird. Didn’t your mommy tell you that we’re done with training after today?”

She hangs her head down, her bouncing stopping as she drags her feet. “…Yes,” she answers, letting his arm go lax as she releases his hand. Hawks pauses, watching as she draws her hands to her waist and anxiously bunches and twists the bottom of her shirt, and Hawks throat goes dry as she asks with glossy eyes, “Daddy, why doesn’t mommy like you?”

He’s completely silent, wondering exactly when she figured it out or if someone in the office had told her, let alone told her the fact that you didn’t like him. Well, he guesses it doesn’t take a genius to figure that out. “How do you know to call me that?"

“Yesterday, my teacher told us that we inhe-inhe-inherent our quirk from our parents. I remember you said Elsa and her son had the same quirk, and you have big wings like mine and can make your feathers move.”

Hawks smiles. She’s a sharp one to piece it together in a day. “Your teacher is right. I bet you’ve never seen anyone else that looks quite like us.”

“No,” she answers, sniffling. “I don’t want to go home. I want to stay and play with you. Mommy is so mean to you. I hate her!”

Hawks cups her chin in his hand, forcing her to meet his eyes. “Look at me. Don’t talk about your mommy like that. It’s my fault she always gets upset when I’m around. I was mean and bullied her a lot, so if you’re mad, be mad at me. I’m the reason we can’t play together more.”

She sniffs again but it isn’t enough to stop the globs of tears running down her cheeks. “When we saw you at the park, mommy started crying when we went home. I didn’t know why she did.”

Hawks knows why. The reason you’re always so angry at him is because of the hurt you still hold inside for what he did to you. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have cried. The opposite of love is indifference as they say, and he knows it’s true because he had been indifferent to the pain he caused ever since the day you came to him with weepy eyes and shaking arms as you told him you were pregnant. You had been scared, and he told you to deal with it.

Hawks scowls. He’s starting to feel sick.

"If you make someone cry, you should say sorry."

Hawks smiles. “I know, baby. I'll apologize to your mama, and I’m going to try my best to make it up to her, and you, too. I’m not going to make either of you cry anymore. Then, when she forgives me, we’ll play together again.”

She looks to him, a small glimmer of hope. “You promise?”

Hawks chuckles and grins at her, the same charming expression that made you fall for him in the first place. He holds out his hand. “Even better. I pinky promise,” he says and confidently hooks her finger with his. “Repeat after me: birds of a feather stick together.”

“Birds of a feather stick together.”

“That’s my girl,” he praises before dropping her hand to pet her head. “I think we might have a little time for me to teach you something before your mommy gets here.”

At the end of the day, Hawks is already waiting for you at the front steps of the agency as your call pulls into parallel park at the sidewalk. You step out and walk towards the steps, but your daughter meets you halfway by hopping over them, her wings flapping to hover before she falls back down onto her feet.

You smile at her. You can’t believe she’s actually flying, at least a little that is, but your surprise is ruined when she cheers. “Mommy, look at what daddy taught me,” she says, bouncing to show you her new hovering skills. “Are you looking? Are you looking?”

“Yes, I’m looking. You’re so good at that. You need to show me more when we get home,” you say but to be honest it’s the last thing on your mind as you glance over to Hawks. “Baby, why don’t you go sit in the car, and I’ll be right there.”

Hawks watches as she obediently follows your instructions, turning her back and happily hopping towards the vehicle.

“(Name), I-” Hawks says, unsure what to expect when your angry glare turns back on him. It isn’t until his yellow visors are already clicking against the pavement that he realizes you hit him. He hisses at the sting on his cheek. “That actually kind of hurt. I guess I had it coming, but I’m not really sure what I did at least recently,” he tries to play off, but you aren’t having it.

“You told her, you told her,” you keep repeating, and he’s backing away in case you decide to strike him again. “Are you trying to get her on your side?”

“Not in the way you’re thinking, and I didn’t tell her,” Hawks explains. “She pieced it together on her own. She’s sharper than you think, she can see that we look alike when she looks in a mirror, and she knows how quirks work. That’s more than enough for her to tell.”

His explanation is enough for you to halt in your assault, and you angrily huff under your breath. You don’t shift to leave, and there’s no door for you to slam away. He finally has you available. “So, what do you want to do now?” he asks.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean she knows; and honestly, I’m glad she does,” he confesses. “I wouldn’t mind seeing her again if you’d let me.”

Hawks swallows his anxiety as he waits for you to answer. Your eyes shift from him back to where she sits in your car, fiddling with the toys obviously left to clutter in the back before you look back at him, thinking.

“She does seem to like you…for some reason,” you add distastefully, but you know full well how happy training makes her. How her little smile beamed when she fluttered over those steps. How the word daddy came from her so sweetly. “She always likes talking about you after she spends the day here. You make her happy. But that’ll just make it harder for her when you leave ag-“

“I won’t,” he cuts off.

“How do I know that?”

“You don’t but I promise not again. (Name), I’m sorry. I’m sorry for telling you to go away like a burden and for not being there. You must’ve been scared, but I won’t leave either of you alone from now on even if you don’t want me there. I’ll be there if you need me.”

“Drop it. I’m not a part of this,” you tell him.

He knows that you’re rejecting his apology, but his ears can pick up what others can’t. He can hear those soft inflections in your voice right before you harden it into aggression, the slight stutter that you so cleverly thought you hid from him as you nearly fumbled your words, a little glimpse of a teenage girl with a crush on her sensei. “Not yet but do know I plan on trying until I make you fall for me all over again. I miss your cute little face when I'd smile at you.”

You glare. “Say that again, and I will smack you in your "cute little" face.”

"You already did that, but if it makes you feel better go ahead, I can take it if it helps you forgive me.”

He just didn’t expect you to actually take him up on the offer. This time, it’s the other cheek that burns.

“You’re right. That did make me feel better,” you say, smirking as you shake the sting from your hand. Hawks grunts, rubbing his jaw as you begin to walk towards your car. He bends down to pick up his shades before following close behind. You open the driver’s door, and say, “I expect you to pick her up at 9 tomorrow. If you’re late, don’t bother showing up ever again.”

Hawks smirks. You certainly became aggressive these past few years, but he thinks he kind of likes it. As you get in your car, he notices Baby Bird smiling at him from the window, her hand up and clutched around that birthday feather he gifted to her as she waves him off.

He’ll definitely be there on time.

[danganronpa-21]

Happy Birthday Best Girl! ft. Some birthday headcanons

I couldn’t manage some writing this year, but for those of you who don’t follow my Instagram, I did manage an edit. Thought I might slap on some fun birthday headcanons to at least contribute a little more for my best girl:

- Based around the math I did two years ago, Kyoko would be twenty-five years old today.

- She’s halfway to being thirty and has no idea how to deal with it.

- She tries not to think about it though, she’s pretty focused on that career of hers! Since the Tragedy’s wake, she’s become a highly requested detective. People mostly ask her to locate or discover the fate of missing family members.

- She gets her birthday off of work. Not because she asks for it herself, but because Makoto asks her to. It’s her second year of being a married woman on her birthday, so she accepts and lets him take care of her.

- She gets birthday breakfast in bed. She hears Makoto stumbling about in the morning to get it, and she feels the absence of his warmth in their bed, but she pretends to be asleep anyway. And pretends to be surprised when presented with breakfast. 

- Kyoko spends her birthday doing pretty much whatever she wants. Literally. Makoto has handed her the reigns to do whatever she wants -- he’s not allowed to say no to her. 

- As such is the case, they end up spending their entire morning watching old detective movies while Kyoko cuddles with Makoto and their grumpy old cat, Kimi. The bonus of this is that she can solve the mysteries before and happily blurt out the answer whenever she pleases. Still, for some of them she strings Makoto along to get him to give the right answer.

- She notices Makoto’s on his phone a lot. He seems like he’s texting someone. She tries to ignore it, thinking it’s probably just work people pestering him. He’s been swamped with paperwork lately. 

- At the end of the movie marathon, they head over to the local bakery to pretend to be a newly engaged couple (rather than the already wedded couple that they are) for the sake of getting cake samples. It’s one of the few times Makoto will happily splurge on anything. They rate the cake flavours from best to worst on a chart Kyoko draws in her notebook.

- Kyoko’s favourite was the chocolate buttercream. Makoto was caught between raspberry chocolate and plain vanilla. Predictably. 

- They stop at the florist on their way through town. Makoto buys her a bouquet filled with an assortment of purple flowers, because they remind him of her. She carries them happily through town.

- Their next stop is to a little book store run by a retired literature professor. She discovers that it’s already been arranged that she should get to spend however long she wants reading books in his store for her birthday. She takes full advantage of this, and spends hours in there. It gets to the point where Makoto has to get her to leave whilst carrying armfuls of books.

- If he hadn’t told her that he intended to take her out dancing as a treat that night, she probably wouldn’t have left. 

- They got home and started getting ready, applying make-up and getting in to their best outfits for the night. It had been awhile since Makoto had last taken Kyoko dancing, so she couldn’t help but be excited. Mostly, they just danced around like goofballs in their kitchen while cooking breakfast.

- When they got in to the car, she noticed something was different about Makoto. He seemed a little too excited to just be taking her out dancing, like he said he was. She knew he must have had a surprise in store, but she didn’t tell him she knew. 

- She couldn’t help but smile at how right she was, as when they entered their dancing venue, she was greeted by shouts of: “SURPRISE!”

- Just as expected, her friends had put together a surprise birthday party for her. They had all been waiting in a decorated venue and everything. She was greeted with all kinds of smiles and hugs and happy birthdays from her loved ones.

- So many loved ones at the party! The room is decked out in purple and white decorations, streamers hanging from the ceiling and helium balloons all over the room.

- There’s an amazing cake, too. Aoi baked it herself, with a little help from Komaru. Toko helped decorate it. Funnily enough, it’s chocolate buttercream -- the flavour she had so greatly enjoyed when she and Makoto were cake tasting.

- Makoto set up other foods, too. There’s tasting plates of some of her favourite around the world delicacies, something she knows must have been expensive. She assumes that this was Byakuya’s contribution to the party. 

- She spends much of the party eating and drinking and talking with her friends, thanking them all for such a wonderful party. She genuinely doesn’t know how she got so lucky to have such loving people in her life. 

-  At some point, Yasuhiro inevitably takes down one of the helium balloons and inhales as much helium as he can to make his voice higher. In this state, he gives a loving speech about Kyoko, and gets the whole crowd to sing her happy birthday. He nearly passes out at the end of it, on account of having inhaled too much helium.

- Once Hiro recovers, everyone starts pushing gifts at her. From Toko, she receives a stack of new notebooks and pens for her detective work. Toko says that she went for her own personal favourite brands, and insists that they’re the smoothest for writing. Yasuhiro gets her a crystal trinket that she doesn’t understand, but he insists that it “embodies her aura” and “will bring her luck in her new year of life”. Byakuya gives her a box of chocolates from Germany, saying he remembered that she had once told him that she loved chocolate from there. He claimed to have “bought some extra while on a business trip there”. Everyone knows he bought them just to be a good friend. Aoi gives her a new pair of gloves, white with cute light purple ribbons. A childish rainbow friendship bracelet is given to her too, with her name written on it. Aoi proudly boasts a matching one. Kyoko slips it on immediately, so happy to have a symbol of friendship. 

- Makoto gives his gift to her last. It’s a diamond necklace, which shocks her, considering his frugal disposition. She acts how much he spent on it, and he doesn’t answer. He insists instead that the sparkle reminded him of her eyes, and he just knew he had to get it for her. 

- The necklace is paired with a book, full of love letters that he has written to her. One for every day, starting on October 6th of the previous year. She hasn’t even read one of the letters yet when she pulls him in to a passionate kiss. Their friends cheer. 

- When she finally pulls back, she can’t help but grin. “So,” She says, “How about that dancing you promised me?”

[unwillingkomaedakin]

Entry 1 - June 14th 2020

during school last week, one of my acquaintances (who i’ll refer to on this blog as s if i remember) asked if i wanted to go over to her house for a sleepover. i was sort of over the moon, but also really anxious. it was my first time being individually invited to a sleepover in years. if this makes more sense, when i used to be in a friend group (that was really toxic), they’d have group sleepovers for birthdays and stuff as well as 1 on 1 sleepovers without the rest of the group. i went to a few of the full-group sleepovers, but i myself was never invited to 1 on 1 sleepovers. i’m always the one who has to ask since no one wants to be around me, which is hard for me since i’m really quiet, anxious and shy. no, not shy, that makes me sound cute, nervous fits it better. anyway, so i was somewhat shocked that someone actually wanted to spend time with me outside of school. i was mainly anxious about it, since i have a hard time sleeping somewhere that isn’t my bedroom. my bedroom is like the room version of comfort characters, it’s my comfort room, the only room that makes me feel somewhat safe. i was also really scared it’d be really awkward. anyway, the day came for the sleepover yesterday. i went to s’s house, and it was really nice. her family was good, really nice. i really wish i had a family like her’s, one that got along, didn’t hate, yell at or abuse each other. they were really nice, and really funny, really supportive of s and her hobbies and dreams. her sister is also really nice. what i’d give to have a family like that. 

the first thing we did was s showed me around the house, i ended up leaving my stuff in her room for a while. she had a really big bed. my bed is really small. i want a bed like her’s. her bedroom walls were painted different colors and had stripes. and omg, she had her own private bathroom. i really want a private bathroom, then i’d pretty much never have to leave my room. s and her sister made rice balls for us for lunch, it was my first time having rice, it was pretty good. we watched a bit of beastars on s’s phone, then we looked around in s’s room for a little. s got up her drawing program and told me about this multi-fandom project she was working on. she said she hoped it’d be turned into a tv series, and when i told her that’d be really hard to do due to copyright reasons, she didn’t really mind and remained hopeful. that really warmed my heart, though some of the things about her project confused me due to the amount of details it had. it was good though. after, we went outside to her shed to get blow-up mattresses to sleep on later. the shed was really big, but relatively clean and cosy for a shed. there was a game room with a tv, a couch and a wii. they had a really big caravan that looked cool. i hate travel, i’ve been on a trip in a caravan before, but it still looked cool. s told me that her family was planning on making an art studio for s in the corner of the shed. i wish my family cared about me like that. i should mention, she isn’t spoiled. she’s really nice, i mean she did invite *me* of all people to come to her house after all. she’s really talented, funny. i don’t really feel a lot towards her or have feelings for her or anything like that, but i sort of admire her. after we left the shed, she showed me their old mower which had exploded a while ago. it was really rusty. we saw a baby bearded-dragon outside, and s told me about how she almost stood on a wild snake when her family first moved into the house. 

we went back inside, and she blew up the mattresses with a pump we also got from the shed in the theatre room. i stood there like the idiot i am, not doing anything like usual. i hate myself, i wish i could actually be useful. s brought in a ton of blankets and stuff and we covered our mattresses with them. we played splatoon on our switches for a bit, we played clam blitz on league, and we actually did really well. i actually contributed to my team quite a bit during it, which made me happy. when we had to charge our switches, s asked if i wanted to watch something. s has wanted to get into danganronpa, and i’m already obsessed with it, so i suggest that we start watching a non-commentary playthrough of trigger happy havoc. i love danganronpa, i can play or watch it a million times and still be engaged and never get bored of it. we ended up watching it for hours, with s lowering the volume whenever a character swore since her parents dislike swearing. while we were watching, we were on our mattresses, i was lying down on my back. out of nowhere, s lay down right next to me with our heads pretty much touching. i don’t have feelings for s or anything, but my heart was beating like crazy and i was so happy. i’ve become extremely sensitive to physical contact since i’ve been starved of it my whole life, and when i do get it, it makes me really happy. i think it might do the thing it does when you hug someone or something, where it releases those chemicals in your head that make you happy. that moment only lasted for a few seconds before she moved, but that was a definite highlight of the sleepover. 

in the middle of chapter 1, before sayaka’s body is discovered, we had dinner. we had spaghetti bolognese, and the whole family sat at the table. they were all really nice. they were talking, making jokes and laughing almost the entire time. i want a family like that. i always eat my meals in my room by myself, so this was kind of new to me. after i finished dinner (i was last to finish because i’m a slow eater) we went back to watching danganronpa, and when we got up to the beginning of the class trial, i went to have a shower and s went to get changed since she wanted to have a shower in the morning instead. s let me shower in her bathroom, i’m not exactly sure why, but i accepted and went to her shower. her mom told me she left me a towel on s’s bed. i went into the bathroom, and i looked in her bathroom drawers for a little bit. there was just normal stuff like brushes, dental flosses and pads. i stopped and started getting ready to shower, and after undressing, i realized i forgot to grab the towel. the towel was on her bed, but i was terrified to go get it since i was already naked. after panicking for a bit, i grabbed my hoodie i had taken off (it’s big so it covered my lower regions) and quickly snuck out of the room, grabbed the towel, then went back into the shower. there was no one in the bedroom, but the bedroom door was open and i couldn’t risk being seen naked. i hate my body. her shower was a bit weird, but i liked it. she had a ton of body washes and shampoo bottles and such on the side. i didn’t know which one to use so i ended up using a random one. there was also a small figure toy thing of a goldfish beside the shower. after the shower, i realized there wasn’t a floor mat and the floor would get really wet. i stayed as still as i could while drying off with the towel, then put it on the ground to use as a floor mat. i picked up the towel after i was dressed and left. s was waiting for me on her bed, and after, we went back to the theatre room to finish chapter 1 of trigger happy havoc. 

s said her favorite characters in the introductions were leon, toko and chihiro. when sayaka died, s was happy because she didn’t like sayaka. when i first played trigger happy havoc and sayaka died, i cried for a while so i couldn’t relate to her. during most of the trial, s was certain that toko was the killer since during the investigation, mondo says none of the boys used their toolboxes so s thought the culprit must have been a girl. s guessed pretty early on in the trial that sayaka tried to frame makoto but ended up getting killed, but she didn’t know it was leon, and completely forgot about sayaka’s dying message. during leon’s execution, she cried a bit, which really hurt me, despite me encouraging her to feel emotions during danganronpa earlier. i tried my best to comfort her, but i don’t think i did a good job. after that at midnight, s wanted to go to sleep. i wanted us to watch a silent voice and make popcorn since i had brought popcorn, but since she wanted to sleep, i decided against it. we went to sleep, though it took me ages to fall asleep. i move around a lot when i go to sleep and sleep, but the sounds the air mattresses made were annoying and loud, so i couldn’t move a lot. i have really bad insomnia, so it took me at least an hour to fall asleep. probably longer since i had grown a headache and felt sick from being anxious from not sleeping in my own bed in my bedroom. i kept waking up in the middle of the night. at around 8:30 we woke up, i was really tired. s wanted to make us pancakes, and since i’ve never eaten or made pancakes and knew trying to help would only annoy her, i decided to just sit on the side and play animal crossing. after a while, the pancakes were done, and me, s and her sister ate the pancakes while we watched beastars. i feel like i should mention i’ve already watched beastars, but s and her sister were in the middle of it. the pancakes were good, but i discovered i don’t really like pancakes. i was too scared to ask for toast, so i didn’t eat much. me and s kept watching beastars in the theatre room, and then my mom came to pick me up. 

it was hot outside, and my mom and s’s mom were talking for ages before they decided to split, so me and s had no choice but to just stand there in the sun. after what felt like ages, s gave me a side-hug and i returned it, then me and my mom left. i enjoyed my time there, but i was happy to go back home. my room is my happy place. when i got home, the first thing i did was take a shower since i really felt like having one. i didn’t get to clean myself properly the night before because i was anxious about taking too long. after that, i just did a bunch of random stuff passing the time, like going through reddit, watching my favorite youtubers’ new videos etc. and all that brings us to right now, me making this page and writing this entry. 

i have to go back to school tomorrow, but we only have 2 weeks of school left until a 2 week break. i have a math exam and history exam next week, neither of which i care for too much. i’m mad i have to take them though, i don’t want to. mainly history, i hate history. in my country, we learn about stupid stuff no one cares about in history. we learn the same stuff every single year, it’s stupid. knowing this stuff isn’t going to help us at all. at least in like america you’re learning about past events and presidents or whatever. all we learn about in history in my country is that the white people killed the natives a few hundred years ago. we learned this stuff in primary school, why are we still being taught it in high school? have they just run out of things to teach in history? in that case, just get rid of history as a subject. it’s that easy. oh god, i’ve gone off on a tangent, i’m sorry. i hate going to school. we never got to make popcorn, so i might make it tonight instead. the Komaeda jacket i ordered a while ago has finally been shipped, it’ll get here soon. i’m excited for that. 

[rubixkun]

I'm kinda curious about Kazuku interacting with class 78 members in an AU where they all survive

How about a non-despair AU? I can try, though I never actually though about it ahh so this’ll be at the top of my head.

Non-Despair AU where Makoto and Kyoko still have Kazuki. I shall call this: “Capn’s Non-Despair Next Gen AU”

Sayaka Maizono:

-Sayaka adores Kazuki and always wants to babysit when he’s a kid. When Kazuki was young, she would dress him up in fun clothes and pretend to put on concerts. Sayaka continues her “I’m an esper” joke with Kazuki and it fools him even when he’s a teenager. Also, Sayaka may have a kid of her own in the AU so…playdates!

Byakuya Togami

-In this AU, I feel like Byakuya would have distanced himself from his class, so he doesn’t interact with Kazuki much compared to my actual Next Gen AU. Most of the times where Kazuki would see Byakuya is if there is a class 78 reunion. Byakuya may also have a kid of his own, but may not interact with Kauzuki much.

 Chihiro Fujisaki

- Chihiro was timid around Kazuki as a kid, but one day Kazuki saw them working on a compute and immediately Kazuki was fascinated. He’d constantly ask Chihiro “Can you make it do this?” and Chihiro would show him how it’s done. As a teen, Kazuki still goes to Chihiro asking about computer databases and whatnot. He says it’s for investigation purposes.

Kiyotaka Ishimaru

-Taka is still a very hard worker, so he doesn’t see Kazuki much as a child. I can see him working at Hope’s Peak for some reason, and that’s where he would interact with Kazuki. Most of the time it’s scolding Kazuki for missing class, though Kazuki tries to explain it’s because he’s out investigating with his mother. Despite this, Taka tries to get along with Kazuki.

Celestia Ludenberg

-I can’t see when she’d interact with Kazuki. I’m not sure if Kyoko would be fond of exposing her son to the “Queen of Liars.” Also, Celes probably moved to Europe after gambling enough money to move away. At like a class reunion, Kazuki would try to be friendly with her. Celes thinks he may make a good vampire butler one day.

Toko Fukawa

- Much like in the actual Next Gen AU, Toko decided she would take charge of teaching a teenage Kazuki how to talk to girls. They don’t interact much when Kazuki is a kid. If Genocider Syo is still uncontrollable, I feel like Kazuki would want to try and stop her from killing, though fails. Syo has stated that Kazuki is cute enough to kill, so he is afraid of her.

Aoi Asahina

- Much like in the actual Next Gen AU, Hina spoils Kazuki. She thrives to be his “Aunt Hina” to Kazuki, and is successful. She kind of sees Kazuki as a kid of her own, but without the hassle of actually raising him. She also tries to help Kazuki in learning how to talk to girls and claims she can do a better job than Toko.

Sakura Oogami

-Hina also decided that to Kazuki, Sakura is “Aunt Sakura.” Kazuki was intimidated by Sakura when he was a kid, what with all the muscles and all. But then Hina showed him how cool Sakura was. Kazuki sometimes would pretend to be like her when nobody is looking. As a teen, he’s asked her to teach him endurance, as Kazuki cannot take punches well, and needs strength and the ability to fight if need be. Sakura admires Kazuki’s willpower, and found him cute as a child.

Hifumi Yamada

- Kazuki was one of those “Can you draw me?” kids when he found out Hifumi could draw, and was his career. Though Hifumi would only agree to drawing him if he could draw Kazuki as an anime hero. Obviously little Kazuki said yes. Kazuki gets a new drawing of him as a different hero each year for his birthday. When Kazuki is a teen, there’s rumors about a doujin going around where Kazuki has his own harem. 

Yasuhiro Hagakure

-Kazuki has been advised to stay away from Hiro, mainly because Hiro’s tenacity to trick someone into giving him money. Though Hiro isn’t like that when Kazuki is a kid. Kazuki thinks he’s cool when he is a kid, but when he grows up, he kinda gets this type of “Meh” feeling about Hiro. 

Mondo Oowada

-Kazuki would probably not interact with Mondo if Mondo and Taka weren’t friends. Mondo doesn’t properly meet Kazuki until he is a teenager. Mondo feels obligated to teach Kazuki how to be a man, because Makoto is Kazuki’s father. One Sunday Kazuki returned home from school with a black eye thanks to Mondo wanting to toughen Kazuki up. Mondo was then greeted by a very angry Kyoko. Mondo’s reaction was “Oh shit I forgot she’s his mother!”

Leon Kuwata

-Leon has known Kazuki since he was a kid. Leon kind of sees himself as an uncle figure, but would never admit it. Kazuki’s fondness for rock music may have come from Leon in this AU. Leon may have a kid of his own at this time, so Kazuki would possibly have playdates with Leon’s kid. 

Mukuro Ikusaba

-When he was young, Mukuro didn’t want to be around him. The times she does interact with him, Mukuro can’t help but see how much of a sweet boy Kazuki is, much like Makoto. When he’s a teen, Mukuro makes the choice that she will protect him. Though Kazuki doesn’t know she’s doing this. He’s asked her to teach him how to fight like her before, and she’s agreed to show him. 

Junko Enoshima

- Junko barely interacts with Kazuki. If she ever mentions the boy, it’s usually to remind Mukuro about how she “missed her chance.” When Junko sees Kazuki, kid or teen, she’ll admit he’s cute, as to be expected. She figures out Kazuki’s incapability to talk to girls, and at class reunions, she takes pride out of making him flustered and nervous, despite her being much older than him. 

like I said, I never thought about this before so this is just something I thought of at the top of my head! I hope this works!!