#tojismain

[tojismain]

clenched jaws and promises — part 2

part 1

The both of you drove in silence for a while, you were looking out the window and Toji’s hands had turned white from his clutch on the steering wheel. 

“Sweetheart.”

You turn to him.

He looks at you for a brief second before turning back to the road, his face stuck in a glare. “What did she say to you?”

“What?” You asked, keeping clueless. “Who?”

“You’re not dumb, baby. Don’t act like it.” He replies.

You inhale a breath and look back out the window, “She didn’t say anything.”

You can see him turn to look at you again, quiet for a moment before he looks straight ahead. 

“Then tell me what’s wrong.”

“Toji, nothing’s wrong.” You say, exasperated.

“Bullshit.” He iterates and the car slows to a stop in the middle of the road. “I know you’re lying. I can see it on your face and I can hear it in your voice. Stop avoiding my question and tell me what’s wrong.”

Your heart pounds harder in your chest and you look at him, worried. “Toji, the car. You can’t just stop-” 

“There’s no one here. Tell me or I’m not moving.” His eyes were now fixed on you as he waited for a reply, and you feel scrutinized in the worst way. 

You were scared; what if what she said was true, what if toji throws you aside the moment he realizes you won’t change into someone else, what if the car gets hit because you couldn’t talk.

Tears gather in your eyes as you look at him. He notices them and moves his hands back on the wheel. 

He closes his eyes as he breathes in harshly. “Fuck.” He moves the car again and you feel like you can breathe again.

“I’m sorry, angel.” Angel.  He only ever used that pet name when he hurt you, and the fact that he was apologizing softened the fear in your chest.

You fiddle with your fingers on your lap, “She just got in my head about something.” You say. “It’s stupid.” 

“It’s not stupid. I don’t like the way you’re acting right now, baby. What did she say to you?” He was adamant on figuring out what was hurting you so bad. 

You swallow and explain, “That you have a type.” Your mouth opens and closes a few times before you continue, “And I'm not it. I’m not what you need. Sooner or later you’ll get bored and- I don’t know. It just makes sense—everything she said.”

“That makes sense to you?” He repeats and then parks the car on the side of the road. 

You turn your eyes away from him.

“No. Look back at me.” He was also adamant on making you understand something.

You felt hot, regardless of the cold air outside and inside the car. But you turn to look at him anyway.

“Get one thing through your head, right now. You’re it for me. I’d never get bored of you. I would never get tired of you. I don’t know what type of bullshit she fed you, but she doesn’t know us, does she?”

You keep quiet but he wants an answer.

“Does she?” He repeated and you felt like crying. Actually, you were certain you were crying.

You shake your head and look down. 

“Then tell me you understand.” 

You don’t know what it was about her and why her words affected you so much. Maybe you had been thinking about this for a while and she confirmed your doubts. 

“You’re used to a different life than mine. I can’t be that girl she was talking about—the type you have or used to have. I don’t want you to feel like you have to settle for me and then realize you have it all wrong.” 

All you could think was now was the time he would tell you to get out of the car, but regardless of his hostile kindness, he would never hurt you more than you’ve already been hurt. 

“Do you really think I don’t know what I want and what I like? Do you think I don’t know that I want you? You’re the only one I want and the only one I'll ever want and if someone gets in your head about that, you talk to me about it.” He reaches forward and tilts your head up.

“Does that make sense, sweetheart?” You look away but he follows your eyes with his own, his eyebrows furrowed as he waits. 

You look at him longer for the first time since you got in the car. He looked completely and honestly sincere. That’s when you decide to believe in someone for the first time in your life. 

You nod your head in reply, and he swipes his thumb over your cheek to wipe the tears.

“Good.” He looks at you for an instant longer, committing your face to memory.

He then places one hand on your thigh and the other goes back to the steering wheel. It was almost as if he was scared you’d disappear, and tonight more than any other night, he needed to know that you would stay.

aurelia

[caniseethefourthsword]

These two fit the fic perfectly, beautifully done on @tojismain ‘s part 🥰

Okay so, my request (if you'll do it) is a Muzan x reader where him and reader are childhood friends and they were deeply in love(and engaged) when he was human but, when he turned into a demon she falls into a deep sleep(like snow white or sleeping beauty) and he loses her for a century or a thousands years and she becomes a legend among the mortals(specifically the Demon slayer corps).

Well, at some point Akaza locates her and they go to retrieve her but, there are Demon slayer corps members there because they found her some way or some how(up to you). Muzan orders what ever upper moons(like 3 of them) with him to restrain the demon slayers there so he can wake his beloved and he does. The way he does it is genitally as if he's waking her up on a Sunday morning. And when she does wake up she brings him down in hug while crying.

She also knows about everything that's been going on and asks her faincé to politely stop over working Akaza before she beats the crap outta him and Muzan is slightly scared of reader. And obviously before they leave Muzan kills the slayers there with 1 survivor who is badly injured but survived to tell the tale.

Reader is human just with a curse or something that makes them live forever

Sorry if this a bit long 😅 I've just had a lot of time to think about this🥲

Don’t be sorry, I love this prompt! Really great idea, thank you!!

*I slightly altered the canon storyline of kny

Millennia

Word count: 3.5k

You woke up to the sound of your mother sliding the door to your room open. The realization hit. It was already morning, and you most certainly were not a morning person. She chuckled at your reaction to the break of dawn. You quickly hid under your sheets, sighing heavily.

"It's time to get up. You should go outside today." She left and went to go make you something to eat. You quickly stepped out and followed her.

"Don't worry, I don't feel that hungry. I just think I'll go outside and draw maybe..." you smiled and went back to your room to go change into a weather-appropriate outfit. It was a tanned kimono with slightly visible wave-like patterns. You giggled to yourself and went outside. Living by the forest had its perks. You could spend hours upon hours lying in the shade of the trees whilst listening to the sounds around you. The rustling river, the singing birds, the whispering leaves. Kids your age were more into arts and whatnot. Your family wasn't exactly of enough wealth for you to enjoy that. You had been lucky enough to inherit the estate from a noble through your father. Your mother was single and your father had died of tuberculosis. He passed long before you were born, so you never really knew him. Let alone anyone of the opposite gender.

"I'll take my leave now, mother!" You yelled and left abruptly. You could already make out the sounds of cicadas and birds flapping their wings. The forest was deep. You knew every little crevice of it like the back of your hand. The forest was your playground.

You trotted down a dirt path through the mesmerizing forest. Your ears welcomed any and all sounds... which included something foreign. It sounded like crying. You had always been alone in the forest. Never had you ever found anyone but animals roaming around. You carefully moved toward the direction of the sound. There was no way to tell who it could be. You didn't have any friends. Excluding the animals you would talk to from time to time. This was no animal. It was definitely human.

Your theory was confirmed when your eyes fell upon a boy crouching by a tree with his face in his hands.

"Hello..." you approached him cautiously, not wanting to scare him away. When he lifted his head you could see he was around your age. Maybe a little bit older by a couple of years.

"Who are you?" The boy asked. He was mesmerizing. His hair was long and curly and he had such beautiful eyes. They were shaded red. It was like looking into an abyss of sorts.

"Ah.. uhm... I'm-" You didn't get to finish, because he did it for you.

"I'll just resort to calling you Hana." He held up a flower and crushed it with one hand. Scary.

"So... You're naming me after some random flower you found?" He nodded and got up with confidence etched onto his face as if he hadn't just been caught crying his heart out.

"What's your name?"

"Kibutsuji... Muzan." He was a stranger, so you had to go on a last-name basis. As to not be rude. Your mother taught you well.

"Well... Kibutsuji, do you not have anywhere to go?" He shook his head and began walking away from you.

"Wait! Do you want to stay with me? I don't think my mother would mind." He hesitated and turned around.

"My birthday is coming up too. I'm already 10 soon! You should come and celebrate with me." You walked up to him and gently tugged at his sleeve. He was wearing a gorgeous yukata. Definitely, something a wealthy person would wear. So then how did he not have a place to return to?

"I don't think I want to." Cold. Very cold. You weren't great with conversation besides that of your mother, so interacting with him was difficult.

"Well then, maybe lay in the grass with me for a little while?" He hesitated, but after you let yourself fall he followed suit. You could see the leaves dancing and the sun peeking through some of them.

"So why are you out here?" You asked out of the blue. He wasn't crying or sniffling anymore, so you figured he wouldn't mind.

"I just don't want to be home right now." You didn't look at him. The two of you were both focused on the tall trees.

"I'm to pass before I turn 20." He said, his voice laced with lament. Your breath hitched. Death was not something you were awfully familiar with, but you knew what it was.

"How old are you right now?" He sighed before giving you an answer,

"I'm turning 12 soon... I don't know how much longer I have, but my condition has been worsening." You quirked an eyebrow,

"Condition?"

"The reason I'm to pass," he explained. Obviously, you felt sorry for him. You had your entire life in front of you whilst his was to be cut short.

"No clergy or physician has looked at you?" It was probably a sensitive question and you regretted even asking it.

"They have, but there's nothing they can do about it. I will pass whether I like it or not." He sighed deeply and turned his head to yours. You did the same and met his gaze.

"I haven't been able to tell anyone. Thank you, friend." His smile was genuine and so was yours. It was nice to have someone whom you could refer to as a friend. That had never happened before.

"Oh.. it seems I have to go home already. Are you sure you don't want to come with me?" To your disappointment, he shook his head gently. You got up and brushed some dirt off your clothes.

"Can you come by tomorrow as well?" You asked, hoping he'd say yes. Luckily he did, so you bowed and took your leave.

Upon arriving home, you couldn't help but think about him. It was sad, knowing he was ill. His family was likely pained at the thought.

That night you could barely sleep. It was hard to do, considering the mixed emotions that consumed you entirely.

You and Muzan had continued to meet up in the forest every day. It went on and on. You grew older and your feelings for him grew fonder. He was tall and there was no doubt in your mind that he was handsome. You were in your mid-teens which only fueled your feelings.

"Kibu, I think we should go elsewhere today. Like the edge of the forest, perhaps?" You'd only ever ventured that far once.

"It won't be long before you can't call me that anymore, you know?" He strolled beside you. It was a soul crusher hearing him say that.

"Hey, don't say that! I don't want to think about it," you scolded. If there was one thing you hated, it was hearing him talk about his inevitable demise.

"That's not what I- you know what, sorry. I apologize. I should not have said that." The air was awkward now. There was nothing but the sounds of chirping birds and whispering trees.

It stayed that way until the two of you finally arrived at the edge. It was beautiful. There was a silent and lightly flowing waterfall. The sun was already setting. Everything together was simply ethereal.

"I had a dream last night," your black-haired friend suddenly chimed. You could tell he was about to tell you something that'd make you emotional.

"You were standing in front of me with those pretty eyes of yours. We were deep in the forest and I asked you to... kiss me." A puzzled look on your face made him subconsciously pull slightly away from you.

"Then what?" You asked. Your eyes were locked on each other. Muzan took it as a sign to move closer to you until he could cup your face with his hands.

"You did. So eagerly. My heart is racing just thinking about it. I know we shouldn't because I won't be here for long, but if you could grant me one wish... it would be a kiss." Tears pooled in your eyes. It couldn't be helped, since you were an emotional person.

"Oh no, please don't cry. I apologize. I shouldn't have-" You just kissed him mid-sentence. His eyes sprung open in surprise, but he leaned into the kiss and slowly closed his eyes. It was magical. You were both young and in love. The only thing that stood in your way was time.

"You taste like strawberries, did you know?" He asked with a slight chuckle. Bashful, you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.

"There is no way for me to ask you to marry me. We're too young. So I will be sure to ask you when the time comes. When we're both old enough and if we both feel the same way by then." Your heart churned at what he said. He wanted to marry. Not just anyone. He wanted to marry you. It was a huge relief to know that he harbored the same feelings for you as you did for him.

"I don't know what to say... I'd love to marry you." You pulled him in for a tight hug. At this point, you weren't the only one crying.

"I adore you, I really do."

"I do know one thing for sure... I want to be with you for the remainder of my life." You sighed but smiled up at him and nodded,

"Of course, I'll stay with you."

Timeskip Muzan (20) Reader (18)

Your head was pounding from crying so much. Just thinking about Muzan made your heart break even more than it already had. It was dust.

"Oh, sweetheart. He's from a wealthy family. Surely you must know that he is in good hands," your mother comforted. She wiped your tears away with a cloth.

"I need to go in. I must see him." Your mother didn't reply, meaning she supported your decision. You knew it would make you absolutely hysterical if you saw him hanging on to dear life. Despite that, you went in.

There you saw the physician inject a strange blue liquid into your beloved fiancé. It took a while to kick in but his body suddenly jerked. At the very same time, your body began to feel heavy. Your ears started ringing and your vision was betraying you. The last thing you saw was Muzan getting up and looking in your direction before your body hit the floor with a thump.

To say Muzan was a wave of emotions was an understatement. He was a tsunami. He tried his best to remain calm, despite his raging emotions and the blood in his veins pulsating from the medication.

"My love," he shook you lightly. The physician came over to pull him away from you. It only fueled Muzan's anger.

"No, you save her right now. Do what you did to me, or so help me, I will end you." Your lover stared the poor doctor down.

"Well... uh... good sir, you see... we only had one dose. It was experimental. There's nothing I can do." Now all Muzan saw was red. In a flash, his anger became an insatiable hunger.

The physician became his first meal.

Something had changed. Muzan wasn't the same. He had changed. His body was much stronger than before. He could feel it in his veins. His skin pulsated with strength. It was so out of fashion for him. He'd always been sickly and careful.

Only after he finished what he started, did he notice your absence. You were gone. You'd vanished when he wasn't looking. Clearly you had been unconscious, so you had to have been taken by someone.

If there was something he couldn't forgive, it was people who dared lay a finger on you. Let alone kidnap you. He sought to find you and who hid you.

Your mother was gone too. He quickly realized she had taken you somewhere. He realized it was true when he saw your mother's corpse in her own house. She had stabbed herself. A note was left behind with details of her love for you and why she hid you.

To anyone who may find this letter, I know exactly where my child is, and I will be taking it to my grave. She will remain safe for all eternity, for it is my duty as her mother to keep her that way. I love my child with my whole heart. I have sworn to take care of her for as long as I should live, and this is I keeping that oath.

He crumpled the paper up in a fit of rage. She was dead. There was nothing he could do... but he was hungry. He was oh so hungry. Why waste your mother, when she could die with a purpose? That was his only justification.

Almost nothing was left of her. She was gone, but so were you. Muzan was heartbroken. He spent nights searching for you. Never did he stop searching for you. No, he couldn't stop. How could he, when he knew you were still out there?

With time, he grew older in years but he just didn't physically age. Which had to have been one of the perks of the medication he'd been injected with. The blue spider lily. The man was a demon. That's as much as he'd gathered from years of living under his new conditions. He fed off of people to survive. He stayed in your house during the day, to not be touched by the sun. Sure, one could call it messed up, but he was only trying to survive.

He spent centuries making himself stronger and stronger, eventually making an army of his species.

You had become a legend among people all over Japan. Word of your story was taught as a work of literature. Nobody knew that you were just another human. Another person with as many aspirations and dreams as anyone else. You were real.

When centuries had turned into a millennium, Muzan was the king of demons and had people do his dirty laundry for him. Whilst he focused on taking down a specific demon slayer as well as the demon slayer corps themselves, you were a priority. He had a special division dedicated to you.

Although nobody believed Muzan when he insisted you existed, they still obeyed his orders. To them, you were the stuff of fiction. Children sang songs about you on playgrounds and books were made about your tragic tale.

"I think you should give up, sir." Kokushibou approached Muzan.

"Whatever do you mean?" Denial. Complete denial. Surely you'd be dead by now. What remained of you was likely dust. A millennium had passed. There was no way you were alive. You were human after all.

"I think you know... that girl. You can't deny death. It's been so long and we've yet to find anything. I think it'd be in your best interest to give it up." The demon was careful to not cross any line that would get himself killed.

"You dare spew such nonsense when you've yet to produce results?" Muzan sighed and continued,

"I shall act as if you never uttered those words to me. Now give me some good news." He demanded.

"Well... Akaza should be back anytime soon." Speak of the devil, a lower rank ran straight up to the two superiors, completely out of breath.

"Muzan, sir, I don't know how and I don't know if we're right... but we may have found her." Muzan's eyes widened.

"Well, I'll be damned," Kokushibu whispered.

"There's a slight problem, however. She's surrounded by demon slayers. We need reinforcements. We've pulled back for now, but we should hurry." Muzan agreed and asked Kokushibou, Douma, and Kaigaku to go with him. He couldn't believe it. They found you.

Making the trip was a piece of cake. With his determination to find you— to embrace you— he could do anything. He could climb volcanoes and jump from tall buildings. Anything.

"Muzan, I must say this is a surprise. I would've imagined it to be made up," Douma said with a slight tease evident in his voice.

"You should know your place, Douma.' Muzan's voice was as cold as ice, but oddly enough— filled with a certain warmth whenever he spoke of you.

"What is she like?" Kaigaku asked. Reminiscing almost cracked Muzan's indifferent facade. He still remembered the long walks in the forest and the first time he admitted his love for you.

"She's an angel." That's all he could say. It described you perfectly. All three of them looked at Muzan with puzzled looks. He had such a peaceful expression. Something they hadn't seen before.

When they finally arrived, he didn't recognize the area. It was deep inside a mountain but well-lit due to the demon slayers having set up camp. He saw the rows upon rows of torches that led up to the group of demon slayers huddled around a bed of flowers where you slept.

The moment Muzan laid his eyes on you, it was as if his heart stopped. Your skin was so smooth and you looked at peace. A lily was in your hands and your hair was long and looked soft.

His trance was cut short when the fight broke out. Douma initiated it. Muzan forced himself to fight and finally brought his fighting form out. One he hadn't used in a long time— if at all. Several demon slayers tried to attack him at once, but to no avail. They were no match against him.

He obliterated them within seconds. However, something inside him told him to spare one. He wanted answers. How could it take him so long and the demon slayers such a short while?

"You, tell me. How did you find her?" He choked the human, only giving him little air to talk with.

"I swear, I don't know anything. I'll surrender! I'm surrendering, please!" He cast him aside and told everyone to wait outside. They all left him to be alone with you. The torches made you look that more magical. The way the light was cast on you made you look like something out of a fairytale.

"My darling... oh how I've searched far and wide for you." He could feel tears forming in his eyes. It had been so long since he let his emotions get the best of him.

He reached for your hand and brought it to his mouth. A gentle kiss was pressed onto the surface, and he felt the warmth of your palm against his cheek. You were wearing a beautiful white dress.

"You've no idea how relieved I am to see you like this. Alive."

He closed his eyes and hoped for the best. Although he wasn't praying, something answered and he felt your hand twitch.

Your eyes fluttered open. Slowly but surely, your fiancé came into your field of view. You felt surprisingly well-rested.

"Muzan, is that you?" Your lover tried not to act surprised so that he could make you feel more at peace.

"Yes, darling. It's me. I've finally found you." He gave you such a sweet smile. It reminded you of the day he first told you he loved you.

"You have... you kept me waiting for a long time," you chuckled. Oh, how he'd missed seeing you joke around. Your laugh was priceless.

"I know, love. I know." You got up and he helped you keep your balance.

"I know about everything. I don't know who told me, but someone did. Someone visited me and updated me every single day. I like to think it was a guardian angel of sorts." You watched the look of dread on Muzan's face. He thought about all the humans he'd killed.

"Don't worry, I don't blame you for what you've done. You did it for me and I understand that." Relief washed over him and it was clear to see. He twirled you around and grabbed you by the waist.

"You should stop overworking Akaza though, I'll beat you to a pulp if you don't," you tried to act upset, but in reality, it was all in good fun. Muzan exchanged a frightened look which melted into a smile.

"I guess you don't need me to defend you, huh?" He pulled you closer and you put your arms around his neck.

"I don't,  but I suppose it'd feel nice to have my knight in shining armor come to my aid as he did just now." The two of you couldn't hold your smiles back.

He leaned into you and you reciprocated his move. Your lips touched in a mellow motion and you dug your fingers into his hair. He squeezed your hips and pulled away,

"I love you, darling."

"I love you too, Kibu."

©ᴛᴏᴊɪsᴍᴀɪɴ

All rights reserved. Please do not recreate/adapt my work without permission!♡

Here are a few fandoms I 100% will accept requests for but feel free (I encourage you) to request some that aren't listed. I might write for whatever you ask for too<3 (these include modern AUs).

Snk

Kny

Fruba

Bnha

Ghibli (any)

Bsd

Jjk

Hxh

Haikyuu

Nge

Hri (high-rise invasion)

Kakegurui

Death Note

Saiki K

Sk8

[tojismain]

clenched jaws and promises

someone tells you that you're not toji's type, were they right or are you just scared?

“You’re Toji’s girl, right?” This girl had been staring at you for the entirety of the party, waiting for her moment to pounce and you just left Toji to get some hors d’oeuvres at the end of the hallroom while he greeted someone. 

“Uh yeah.” You replied, smiling slightly. 

She hums with an amused smile. “You’re different from what I expected.” 

You could’ve imagined the whole thing, but you could swear that the sentence carried a venomous tone. 

“Oh? What did you expect?” You asked, hoping you misread her intention. 

“I mean...” She gestures over your frame with her black-painted acrylics. “Just- you know, you’re not really his type. Not what I expected to see.” Definitely venomous.

“And what exactly is his type?” Your smile was completely gone as you stared at her. 

“Different, that’s all. Guess he switched up, didn’t he?” Her smile grows at the sight of your discomfort and you were certain your eye was twitching. 

“I guess so.” You grasped the glass in your hand tighter. 

She steps closer and leans her head forwards as she whispers, “He’s going to get bored, you know? He needs someone exciting. I doubt you and your life can keep it enticing for him. No offense, you just seem like the fragile-type. I mean you probably didn’t even want to come to this, did you?” 

"Yeah." She laughs as she backs up before continuing, her voice back to normal, “But what do I know? Maybe he’s into that.” And you doubt she knew what Toji needed. 

Your jaw was clenched and your words come out shaky, “Thanks for letting me know.” 

She brushes her hand over your shoulder, “No worries! Just giving you a heads up. It’s pathetic to see someone cling on to something that’s clearly not meant to be.”

In that moment, you wished you were more confrontational and could slap her, but you walk away before causing a scene. 

You end up in the fancy bathrooms looking at yourself in the mirror. Was she right? You knew Toji went for different types of girls before you, but that means nothing right? But, all you could see was a reflection of things you weren’t for him.

You spent some time in there fixing your makeup and trying not to let her words affect you. It wasn’t effective but you were really good at lying to yourself, so for tonight, it’ll have to do.

You step out of the restroom and see Toji leaning against the wall, his arms crossed. He looked unbothered and straight-faced, until he turned to look at you.

He looks at you for a second before reaching out and grabbing your wrists, pulling you to him and trapping you between his body and the wall. 

A gasp leaves your mouth at the sudden movement, “Is something wrong?” You breathed out. 

He leaned down to bury his face in the crook of your neck, he hums, “Took you a while in there.” He says in a grumble. 

“I just- I needed to freshen up.” Your face burned red as one of his hands gripped your waist, keeping you against him.

“For that long?” He asked as he nipped the skin on your shoulder, starting to leave small marks.

You whine at his actions. “Toji-”

His nips turn to peppered kisses. A grin makes its way on his face at your whining. 

“What’s wrong, baby?” 

His question was meant to be teasing, but it reminded you of your previous conversation with the girl and you moved away from him slightly.

“Nothing.” You managed to mutter out. 

He lifted his head and looked down at you. His eyebrows furrow, “Are you okay, sweetheart?”

You nod your head and smile slightly, “Yeah I'm okay.”

He noticed that something was bothering you so he grabbed your chin with his hand and let his eyes roam over your face. 

“When are we going home?” You asked before he could make any comments or ask any questions. 

You avoided his eyes and tried to move your face away from him, but he splays his hand at your jaw. He brushes his thumb back and forth and he notices your discomfort—not from him, but clearly from something. 

“Soon. We’ll leave soon, baby.” He trails his hand down to your own and interlaces your fingers. 

The both of you walk away from the hallway and make your way back to the mainroom. The minutes go by with Toji talking to numerous people, his words were now quick, wanting to leave more than anything.  

Eventually he turns to look at you, “Let’s go now, yeah?” He asks, his gaze harshening as he fixes on someone else behind you.

part 2

aurelia

[tojismain]

toji x sick!reader synopsis. you have a migraine and mama bear toji takes over (I love him)

This was not an attractive position to be in. Not in any way you can think of. Face planted into the bed, body stiff and straight, Toji confused and worried. 

With work piling on your desk and people speaking to you in different tones of aggressive, work had been more than exhausting. You made it home at 5pm, Toji still caught up in whatever he was doing. A migraine caught up to you faster than you could change out of your clothes, and so, with your blouse unbuttoned and your shoes taken off, you opted for taking away your senses, and shoving your face into the mattress. 

Toji makes it home and is in the midst of loosening his collar as he walks into the bedroom, when his eyes are caught on your figure. Toji is not a stranger to you taking naps, he usually joins you. This time, something was clearly off. 

"Sweetheart? You asleep?", he asks as he turns on the lamp on your bedside table. Although your face is mostly covered, the light makes it through the gaps— making you want to cry as the headache worsens. In a sloth-like movement, you use your hands to cover your face even more, hence, inciting the worry he's now certainly feeling. 

He grimaces at your action and turns off the light, "headache?". Toji knows that the headaches you got every once in a while, were anything but desirable. He notices a slight movement of your head, which indicates a 'yes, toji, im currently dying, so please stop talking', which he's also familiar with. 

He takes a seat next to your place on the bed and asks you to roll over slightly, mindful of his gruff voice. You do as he says and his hand —which dwarves over your own— is then placed on the back of your neck. You can feel his stillness as he calculates what's an okay temperature.

You see, Toji's mean, unbelievably so, cruel intentions and an even crueler smile. Not with you. Never with you. It's different, the way he looks at you, the way his eyes soften after coming home, his guard down, and his head light. But even then, he's still learning, what's okay, what's not, when you need him and when you're capable. Right now though, you needed him, desperately. It was either him, or feeling like someone was actively banging metal in your head.

So he decides that the heat coming off of your neck was not normal. He learns, for you. His scarred hand moves over to your forehead as your eyes are screwed shut. As his hand moves to lift off, you decide that's not good enough, so you grab his hand and lower it back on your forehead. It was warm, and surprisingly helping with the migraine. 

"Baby, i'll be right back, okay?", he says worriedly. Unaware of why you're gripping his hand so gently against your skin.

You whimper shaking your head. "It hurts."

"Where does it hurt baby?", he seems relieved to hear you talk. 

You drag his hand to the right side of your head. "Here", you whisper, sighing as his hand relieves some of the ache.

He brushes his thumb delicately over the same place. 

"I'll get you some pain killers, it's definitely a migraine." 

You shake your head once more, "just a second", you promise as you keep holding his hand against your head. 

"Just a second", he vows with softening eyes. He uses his other hand to cup over your adjacent cheek, brushing your hair out of the way.

When Toji lets go, he leaves the room to grab painkillers, and unbeknownst to you, he also boils water for a heating pad, grabs a mug of steaming water— boiled with lemon and ginger, and he got a ton of water bottles. A ton. He would never admit that he definitely googled all of that.

When he's back, you're back to your position against your pillow, head sinked in, arms surrounding your face. 

He places the tray with everything on your bedside table. You turn your head and spot the contents, you squint at him.

"Are you going to drown me?".

Toji chuckles and shushes you, "you need to stay hydrated", is his response

"Mmm", you hum in reply. A sharp pain then shoots behind your eye making you screw your eyes shut and you let out another whimper. 

"Sweetheart?", Toji is careful not to touch you, knowing that now, it could make it worse. 

The pain fades for a second, and you open your eyes as you feel tears prick in their corners.

"Hey, why are you crying?", Toji's eyebrows furrow in concern. His sentence more of a demand than a question. A pout visible on the creases of his lips.

You don't answer him, only looking for ways to stop the headache, it was excruciating, more so than usual. But you knew it would go away, especially with him here. 

And so Toji uses his warm hands, warm tone, and light touch to lull you to sleep after taking the pills, knowing that it was the only way the painkillers were going to work best and how your migraine would go away. 

As you're sleeping, Toji sits next to you on guard. It was almost as if everything disappeared, and your frame was the only thing visible in his sight. If anyone asked him, he would probably say you had a halo over your hurting head. To Toji, his senses almost heightened when you were sleeping, he didn't want you hurt, ever. He needed you safe and he hated seeing you vulnerable. His hand hovers over your head, caressing whenever he knew he couldn't wake you. He grabs a warmed cloth and puts it on your forehead, careful not to press too much weight onto your head.

For a big person, he was small in his gestures— soft, and willing. 

An hour later, you feel a feather-like touch caressing your nose as you're waking up. Your eyes slowly blink open, looking up at Toji with a drowsy confused expression. He grins at your state, you look incredibly innocent this way. 

"Sleeping beauty is up."

You smile in response, letting your eyes blink a few times to shake off the sleepiness. You then notice Toji's hand hovering over your face with...a makeup wipe?

"What're you doing?", you ask and his smile widens at your groggy voice.

"You fell asleep with your makeup on", is his only explanation.

You could possibly combust right now. 

"Close your eyes."

—aurelia—

[tojismain]

10 things you hate about toji

He says your name, his voice low and firm, clearly irritated by your cold demeanor. You continue looking at the flowers on the window sill, trying to avoid the way his shoulders brush against you. He grits his teeth and looks away for a moment, gathering a breath before saying, “Look at me.”

You turn your head and lift it up, trying to put on a brave front. You always managed to avoid arguments, even if Toji was irritated and tried to get on your nerves, you never let it go too far, but this time he managed to do just that. He got home, frustrated and itching for someone’s face to fall on his fist. But he wanted to be home to be next to you, to forget all about his violent tendencies and to have you lay in his arms, looking up at him with that in-love expression, but his temper prickled his skin and made him bite cruel words in your direction. 

His gaze locks onto yours as he takes in your expression. He can see the flicker of vulnerability that flashes by, a reminder of the fact that you always tried to handle things on your own. You let yourself fall under the pretense that you could be there for Toji but him being there for you was laughable, and because of that he rarely got to comfort you, but looking at you right now, he wanted to do nothing more than hold you and smother you in constant affection. 

His tone tilts to a softer hum, “Why are you avoiding me?” 

You furrow your eyebrows and bite your lip to stop it from shaking, “Are you serious?”

He frowns at your question, his jaw clenching. He knew exactly why you were avoiding him, he was mean, how did he expect you to confront that? But that’s exactly what he wanted, he needed you to stand up for yourself. 

“Yes, I’m serious. Why are you avoiding me?” He repeats. 

You falter for a second, looking away for a moment before locking your eyes back on his, “Because you hurt me, Toji.” Your voice breaks on the emphasis of his name. 

His heart stutters with an ache and he tenses for a second. His eyes flutter shut for a few seconds and he clenches his jaw, annoyed with himself. After that, he steps forward.

“I didn’t mean to.” He starts. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

He’s so close now you could feel the heat radiating off of his body, the tension thickening in the vast room. 

Your expression falters once more and you look down, avoiding him even with his close proximity. He notices the shift and steps even closer, he reaches out, fingers gripping your chin, lifting your head up. You let out a short unintended huff to avoid crying.

He sees the tears gathering in your eyes and the ache spreads over his chest, curling around him like a nasty virus. His grip on your chin loosens, perfectly gentle. 

“Stop doing that.” He orders.

“Doing what?”

“Holding it in.” He explains. “You don’t do that. Not with me.”

He moves his hand just in time to catch a tear swiveling down your cheek. 

“I hate—” You take a breath, quick inhales and exhales following. “I hate that you hurt me, I hate that I can’t fight, and I hate that I can’t hate you.” 

He feels the frustration radiating off of you in unsteady waves, the anger apparent in between the hurt. His eyes roam across your tearful face. 

“You really should hate me.” He says, his voice quiet. 

“I know.” You whisper. 

He holds your gaze for a moment. He can see the conflict, and the hesitation. 

His hand moves from your cheek to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “But you don’t.” He confirms, and you shake your head. 

He brushes his hand against your jawline, hoping that it was a solace for you.

“I can work with that.” He says before he slowly tucks your head against his chest, ironically hoping to shield you from the hurt he caused.

[tojismain]

first kiss, hundredth hesitation

requested by anon ʚɞ ⁺˖ ⸝⸝

you refuse to kiss toji and he refuses to let it go

The rain was incessant against the windshield and your cheeks were cold from the ice cream and the constant smiles. You and Toji were out on your sixth date and it was perfect. He parked his car so it overlooked the ocean underneath you. It was the end of the date, the sky was dark, and your fingers were frozen against your cold cup. 

You were rambling about something you saw earlier today and he didn’t interrupt you once. Toji wasn’t much of a talker, but he enjoyed watching and hearing you talk more than anything else. Your eyes were darting between him and the water as you ranted expressively—the ice cream spoon pulling against your lips. 

Toji’s gaze was everywhere on you but especially your lips. He tried to kiss you on the third date, and on the fourth, and the fifth, but you were making it hard on him. Anytime he tried slotting his lips against yours, you’d turn your face, acting clueless, or you’d step back and tell him to have a goodnight with the sweetest smile. He brushed it off as innocence and gullibility, but it was getting harder to not know what it’s like to kiss you, and he was desperate—frustratingly desperate to know.

“Sweetheart.” Toji cuts off your speech with the pet name. You turn your head towards him, your cheeks already turning red, worried you were talking too much.

“Yeah?” You answer, breathlessly.

“Come here.” He orders softly, looking at you. 

You look at him dumbfounded, waiting for him to elaborate. He chuckles at your expression. When you still don’t move, he reaches over and places his hand under your jaw to move your head downwards. His other hand taps against his thigh. 

You were definitely red now. Impossibly hot in your cheeks, your nose, your ears—everywhere. But, regardless, you put your hand in his as you move yourself over the console to sit on his lap. You looked down, too scared to look at his face, finding his black shirt a perfect distraction. 

“Y/n.” He whispers, and you think about staying perfectly still. Still enough to disappear, because he made your heart race incredibly fast and you weren’t sure how fast a heart could beat before it stops. 

Again, he slots his hand under your face, but this time, he brings your gaze upward. His thumb brushes back and forth against your jawline and cheek. Eventually, he places his thumb against your bottom lip and he drags the finger against it. 

A few quiet seconds go by before he says, “Why won’t you let me?” 

“W-what?” You reply, heart still beating quickly. 

“You won’t let me kiss you.” He insists, and you swallow, feeling nervous. 

You let out a breath and drop your gaze again, feeling his hand slip away from your face. 

As much as he wants to kiss you, he wants to know if you like him even more. Toji was aware of his appearance, big and scary, pointed at by everyone. He wasn’t sure he could be soft enough for you, but he had somehow hoped so because you made his heart beat exactly the way he made yours rush. He had never felt that feeling, but he wanted to feel it all the time, especially if it meant he could keep looking at you.

You press your hands against his abdomen and fiddle with his shirt before feeling stupid and letting the cloth go. “I-”, you let out a breath as you try to align the thoughts in your head. “I don’t want to be a bad experience.” 

One beat, a second, “A bad experience.” He repeats. 

You nod and realize that you have to explain.

“I’ve never kissed anyone before.” You look up to see his reaction but he just looks at you, his hands placed on your waist. 

“I’ve never kissed anyone before, and I don’t know how to and you’re old-” Your eyes widen and you stutter before you elaborate, “n-not old, like old-er, and you probably have a lot of experience and I don’t- I mean I wouldn’t know how-” His chuckle interrupts your rant and you stop to look at him, puffing out your cheeks for a moment. 

“It’s not funny! I swear I wouldn’t know how to-” Your cheeks were on fire. 

“Sweetheart.” He calls out and you stop talking. His hands find their place on the sides of your face again and his thumbs brush against you once more—he slowly brings you closer. 

His eyebrows furrow for a second. “You could never be a bad experience.” He says softly and you look up at him like he hung the moon. 

You could never be a bad experience. You had no idea what good deeds you’ve done to end up next to him, but you would do them a million times over if that meant you could keep looking at him.

“Do you want me to kiss you?” He asks. And although your face burns crimson, you answer back, “Yes.”

You both look at each other for a moment longer before leaning in. You could feel how warm his skin was, right before he pushed his lips onto yours. Tingles rush up your face and you breathe in suddenly, not expecting a kiss to feel like that. His lips fit against yours perfectly. It felt perfect. His lips were warm against your ice-cream-cold ones, and your heart beat even faster. You grip his shirt in your palm as he moves against you. 

Earlier than you’d like, he pulls away, not wanting to overwhelm you, and you look at him with that dumbfounded expression again. He smiles, leaning his forehead against your own. Your breaths clash for a few moments.

“Was that a bad experience?” You ask, shyly smiling—half sarcastic, half expectant. 

He laughs and leans his face into your neck, pressing a kiss under your ear. “Definitely not.”

You wrap your arms around his head and let him stay there—you should’ve kissed him sooner. 

aurelia

[tojismain]

Heyy!! Love ur work eveytime I read one of ur fics I get so many butterflies lolll, ✨✨

I was wondering if you could do like a Toji x shy/studious reader where they are in a library and she’s trying to reach for a book on a tall shelf and Toji flirts w her and helps her only with a kiss or smth. LMAO so specific but yeah play around with it if u want! <33 I LUV FLIRTY TOJI 💕💕💕

hiii!! ahh thank you <33 sorry this took so long! I hope you like what I wrote and thank you for sending in a request! <33

request by/written for: @allisonr729 ʚɞ ⁺˖ ⸝⸝

Toji was impossible. Impossible to study with and certainly impossible to focus around. It was easy to slip away from him—well it was easy to lie. Toji was clingy and telling him you wanted to study alone was an invitation to an hour-long glare. So you simply lied. 

You were in the library, books spread out on your table and the swinging of your legs to keep you company. You needed to get up at some point to reach for a book. Your height preventing you from even getting close. But you managed to successfully sneak away from a 6'2 man, a book shouldn't be a problem. 

10 seconds of frustration in and someone's arm reached over your head to pull the book out. Whoever it was had their body caging you in against the shelf. You knew exactly who it was. The familiar hands gave it away. Or was it how close he was to you? How you could smell his cologne and how his chest was almost touching your back. 

You wouldn't turn around. You lied and he still found his way to you. He was impossible.

"Wanna look at me?" His gruff voice causing your face to blush. 

You bit your lip and cringed at how you were caught in such a stupid lie. If anyone else were to look at you, they'd think you were caught with your hands bloodied. 

You shake your head and keep your body facing the bookcase. 

Toji sets the book somewhere on the shelf and turns you around. His hands set on your waist. 

You lower your head and look at your feet. He trails one hand towards your neck, thumb placed on your chin as he gently lifts up your face. But your eyes keep moving towards everything except him. Which was hard given the fact that he was everything, everywhere.

He chuckles and taps his thumb on your chin.

"What's up, sweetheart?"

"Nothing." You squeak out. 

He lowers your head to be directly in your eyesight. Now this, this was what made him impossible. He had the ability to dumb you down to nothing when you were just studying. When you were so smart, you made him look at you like a love-struck idiot—listening to whatever you were spewing.

"Why's your face all red then?" 

Him and his pretty eyes would probably find you if you were stranded at sea. 

"The library's h-hot, you know? B-books and all." You had no clue what you were saying. 

An amused smile stretches across his face.

"So it's not because I caught you running away from me?"

"Ye- No? I wasn't running." You looked up at him, begging to be believed. 

He raises an eyebrow in amusement. You stayed quiet. 

He hums and moves his hand to move your hair out of the way. He tucks a strand behind your ear and trails his hand to the side of your neck to lift your face up one more time.

He brings his face incredibly close to yours. His lips barely touching yours. Your eyes were hooded, you looked down at his lips, and you leaned forward hoping to catch them with your own. Time stopped and you could feel his breath against your lips. This close. 

Instead, he laughs and pulls his face back. His hand was warm against your face.

"You want me to touch you that badly? I thought you wanted to be alone."

You brought your hands up to cover your face. 

"My poor baby." He chuckles. "She's all red." 

You shook your head and tried to move away from him. Back to your table and hopefully away from how he was making you feel. But he wouldn't let you.

"Toji." You whined. "I need my book."

He reached for the book again and held it above you. He looks at you, blinking slowly.

"You need this, sweetheart?" He teases.

You pout and furrow your eyebrows at him. He uses his thumbs to smooth over them.

"Kiss me." He demands. "Kiss me and I'll give you the book."

Your jaw drops slightly. "I tried and you-"

"That was then, this is now." He explains.

You leaned up and quickly pecked his lips

You feel his arms reach around you to the back of your thighs as he lifts you up. You gasp and softly yell out his name. 

"Toji. Put me down." 

He starts walking towards the table you were seated at. Did he forget this was a public space?

If it was possible, you had gotten redder so you shoved your face in his neck, hoping to avoid his gaze as well as anyone else's.

He sat down with you on top of him. You were unmoving against his lap. He was comfortable against you and far too annoying to make you look at him.

"Was that supposed to be a kiss?"

You pulled your head out of the crook of his neck and bit your lips nervously. You sighed and leaned forwards as you brushed your lips against his— you were finally close enough to completely and fully kiss him. He lets out a breath as he moves his lips in tandem with yours. Gripping your shirt tightly. Everything around you disappeared. No books, no people, no one, except him.

Him, him, him.

He pulls away looking at you with a hooded gaze.

He moves his hands against the side of your hip and taps his thumb against it. 

"Study, sweetheart. Isn't that why we're here?" 

Unbelievable.

You stood up off his lap, still out of breath, to move to another chair but he grabs your wrist softly and pulls you back on top of him. Now, you were facing the table whilst his chest was pressed against your back. 

"Here, baby."

You couldn't even fight the smile off of your face. You try to get serious.

"Fine. But you can't distract me Toji. I mean it." You looked back at him.

"I won't. Have to let my baby get smart. Hm?"

You were about to start studying, only 10 seconds had passed, ten, when he lifts his hips upwards and moves himself forwards to lean back on the chair. 

"You comfortable?" He asks twirling your hair around his fingers. 

Impossible.

[tojismain]

toji x fem!reader comfort

synopsis. you come home from a disappointing night out with your friends and toji is there to pick up the pieces :P

You had been out after a spur-of-the-moment plan with some friends. You were excited, thinking that maybe you would be able to talk to them like you once had.

The night is over and you're back home, you open the door, carefully removing your heels, biting your lip and holding in tears. 

If this night could sum you up in one word, it would be brooding.

Safe to say the excitement buzzed away faster than you noticed.

Toji sits on the couch in the living room, he glances your way as he's leaned back, one leg propped on the other as his left heel touches his right thigh.

Every other night you would come home smiling brightly, barely taking off your shoes, tripping over your words as you show him pictures from the night out, or what food you ate and how weird it was. This time, nothing. 

"Hi, sweetheart. How was it?", he asks looking at you.

You walk by the couch, adjusting your purse on your shoulder.

"It was good", you smile softly at him. "I'm a bit tired though, i'll probably change and go to sleep".

Toji noticed. Just like he notices everything else, how your smile was genuine but off. How you were fighting a frown. He knows when something is wrong, when the wrong person has said the wrong thing and when your heart feels a little heavier than usual.

He reaches out and gently clasps his hand around your wrist. His grip moves from your wrist to your hand. Both of his feet are now on the ground, he spreads his legs and leads you slowly in between them, you stand there feeling like a scolded kid.

You look away, anywhere but his face, because although you have the tendency to hold your tongue and hide, you're unable to stop yourself from biting your wobbling lips and blinking away the tears, knowing that he knows.

"Wanna tell me what's wrong?"

And of course, he would know. 

You opt for shaking your head instead of outright saying 'nothing's wrong'. But nothing slips past him. 

He reaches for the purse on your shoulder and takes it off, gently placing it on the couch. He moves you so you're sitting on one of his thighs. His hand moves to your calf, pressing soothing circles onto it. 

"What happened, sweets? Talk to me", his gaze doesn't waver from your own. Unlike his roughened appearance and his furrowed eyebrows, his voice is soft, almost a whisper.

"They-", and this time, unlike all the other times you've complained about how your friends treat you, felt different. Maybe this time, you knew Toji would tell you to not see them again, and maybe this time you would listen. 

A frown etches onto your lips. "They just- um- they said how- I don't know toji, just stupid comments, and you know, what they usually say about everything".

"And what's that?", Toji's eyebrows now furrowed and waiting.

"It's stupid Toji. I promise it's nothing serious, I'm just-"

"Just what? Hurt over nothing. You know that's not true, right?", Toji looks it you expectantly as his hand brushes down the sides of your arm.

"It's always like this, you know that", you voice breaks. Knowing that if this explanation goes on for longer than this, you'd lose it.

He then brushes his knuckles gently, almost ghost-like, on your cheek, back-and-forth. His thumb moves to grip your chin moving your face upwards to meet his eyes. 

"Sweetheart, the fact that you chose a different life than theirs means everything. To you and to me. If they're still petty after all that time you've spent being happy for them, then...", he sighs exasperatedly, "...it's truly their own fault and their own emotions they need to get a hold of-",

"-Listen to me when I tell you that you haven't done anything wrong".

You look down to avoid his eyes, but he moves his head alongside yours. 

"Tell me you understand."

You pout unable to process how much he loves you. How his love could make up for a thousand unrequited ones. 

His thumb brushes against your bottom lip.

"Hm?" he presses.

You nod, but obviously that's not enough for him.

"Say it, angel" he says, "say you understand that you haven't done anything wrong."

"I haven't done anything wrong", your pout juts out as you talk. 

"Good."

He moves your body so that both of your legs are on top of his thighs. Straddling him. You move your head against his chest and he hums. His hand now cradling your head, brushing over your hair. 

"Now, what do you want for dinner sweetheart? Pretty sure the entrées were bigger than the main courses."

You chuckle against his chest and he smiles down at you. 

"It wasn't that bad", you insist. 

"Mhm" he murmurs unconvinced, he asks looking down at you, a smile still playing at his face.

You lift your head, "they were definitely smaller", your answer comes out in a scoff. The look on Toji's face makes you laugh as he groans, you let your head fall back on his now rumbling chest.

A moment passes. 

"How about real dinner, baby?"

[tojismain]

tojismain masterlist

last updated: 08 September 2024

Toji Fushiguro

-> picking up the pieces — fluff/comfort

syn. you come home from a disappointing night out with your friends and toji's there to comfort you

-> mama bear toji — toji x sick reader comfort

syn. you have a migraine and he takes care of you

-> "then why won't you look at me?" — toji x stressed reader comfort

syn. stressed with work and toji forces you to take care of yourself

-> olives and kisses — fluff/comfort

syn. giving him the silent treatment and he finally snaps (in a good way)

-> toji x shy/studious reader — fluff

syn. toji being a menace when you avoid him

-> first kiss, hundredth hesitation — fluff

syn. you're hesitant to kiss him after a few dates so he confronts you

-> 10 things you hate about toji — hurt/comfort

syn. tojis mean but you can't hate him

-> clenched jaws and promises — hurt/comfort

syn. someone approaches you at a party telling you you're not good enough for toji, will you keep quiet and ignore it or will you tell him?

Part 1

Part 2

Kento Nanami

-> only ever yours — hurt/comfort

syn. kento hurts you when he's trying to protect you

Satoru Gojo

coming soon <3

aurelia

[tojismain]

Hiiii! I'm the anon who requested the fic where the reader avoids kissing toji bc she's inexperienced. Thank you soooooo much for writing it🥹😭💗💗💗💗 This my first request someone made🥹🥹 It was so cute, I love it so much💗💗💗💗💗 it means so much to me omg😭 I'm so grateful🙏💗💗💗💗💗

-🐈‍⬛H

HII! <3 AHH thank you 💗 I'm SOSO glad you enjoyed it 💗💗💗💗thank you for sending in the request, it was adorable 💗💗

[tojismain]

olives and kisses

you give toji the silent treatment and he's not having it <3

"So you're not going to talk to me?"

You've been trying so hard to ignore him. To not look him in the eyes. But he's admittedly making it harder. 

You leave his question hanging in the living room and head to the kitchen.

You needed a distraction and a jar of olives seemed perfectly capable of distracting your stomach. Except you couldn't open it.

You keep trying until your hand is red. In the haze your frustration, you completely miss his footsteps until he's right behind you. Chest pressed against your back.

His arms wrap around you, he grabs the jar and puts it down on the counter. He gently turns around your hands until your palms are facing up, his jaw clenches when he notices the irritated skin. He turns you around so that you're facing him—back leaned on the counter. 

"I'm not talking to you." You say before he even says anything. 

He chuckles, eyes gently closing for a second, his momentary concern gone. "I didn't say anything, sweetheart."

You look up at him with furrowed eyebrows.

He lifts his own eyebrows silently asking you to say something more. But you don't.

"You know I'm sorry." He brushes his thumbs back and forth on the palms of your hands. "I never meant to upset you pretty girl."

You falter for a second. "Y-you can't say stuff like that. I'm still not talking to you."

"Fine. I'll talk to myself. I'm a great conversationalist." He says assuredly.

You scoff and turn your head away, unable to move away since he's still standing in front of you. 

"You're impossible," you whisper.

"You're doing a terrible job at your protest, baby." 

You gasp, "you're the one- you know what, i'm taking a vow of silence this time."

"Does it come with a 'no olives' clause?" He adds making you drop your jaw.

He laughs, seeing if your so-called 'vow of silence' would last any longer. And it does.

A few moments pass. 

"I'm sorry." He brings your right hand up and presses a kiss on your palm. You couldn't help but feel butterflies flutter around in your stomach. 

"I'm just so sorry." 

Another kiss to your other palm.

"Do you want me to be on my knees, baby?" He adds.

You furiously blush and shake your head. 

"You're not being fair. You're manipulating me." You softly add, your frustration melting away.

He lands another kiss on your cheek.

"Well, is it working?"

"Maybe."

"Good. Because I hate it when you're mad at me." A kiss to your forehead. 

"Me too."

"So you'll talk to me now?"

You nod avoiding his gaze. He cradles your jaw and lifts your head up. 

"That's my girl."

[tojismain]

"Then why won't you look at me?"

toji x stressed!reader because i needed to write fluff, angst, and comfort <3

Nothing you ate sat right in your stomach. You would say you're anxious, but you stopped feeling nervous hours ago; now you just felt frustrated, hands gripping the hair on the sides of your head. You couldn't, for the life of anything, understand why it was so hard to just know this. To learn the information and know how to apply it perfectly. You were past being anxious, and you had fallen straight into being scared—scared that if you didn't do this right, it would be disappointing.

You've been sitting at your desk for the past four hours, feeling restless. Toji has been texting you but you stopped checking your phone ever since you muted it, caught up in your own discomfort.

While you're sat there, gripping your head, you hadn't even noticed the tears falling straight onto the words you've written, smudging them. The tears felt warm, running down your face far too quickly. You look down, almost mesmerised, momentarily oblivious to your work, your mind going blank. You miss the sound of the front door unlocking, miss Toji walking in, and completely miss the call of your name.

Toji's eyebrows furrow once he spots you sitting at the desk. It wasn't anything strange, but it was your complete disconnection that catches his attention.

"Sweetheart?" he tries again.

His steps are calculated as he approaches you. Even as he stands right next to you, your eyes are still boring into the pages.

"Hey."

The sight of your hands and their position in your hair deepens his frown. His own reaching for yours, gently grabbing them as he stands over you. Your head turns, nose and cheeks red.

"Toji?"

"Sweetheart, what are you doing?" He lets go and moves to crouch right in front of you, his hands finding yours once again. He starts rubbing soothing circles on your knuckles.

You sniffle and let out a chuckle "Studying?" Your answer comes out with a light breath.

"Hm." He hums in acknowledgment. "And when's the last time you got off this chair, baby?"

Your eyes turn hazy at his question, and you frown, unable to control your face or emotions. You opt for shrugging. Looking at him uncertainly.

You know how important it is to take care of yourself, and you definitely know how much it matters to him.

"How about we go eat dinner?" His words are soft, and so are his hands. You glance down at them.

You shake your head. "I have to study, Toji. You should eat. I just need to finish—"

"Baby—"

"No. I'm going to finish this." You let yours hands slip from his, and you turn back to your desk. You hear him standing up, but you ignore his movements and start looking through your papers again.

"Just a few more minutes." You add.

"You need to eat something—"

"I'm not really hungry."

His hand lands on your shoulder, and you shrug it off so fast, almost as if it was scorching hot.

Toji's fists clench in on themselves. He knows you get like this sometimes, but you never took it out on him. Never shrugged him off. His hurt isn't visible but he still wishes you would talk to him instead of pretending like you can do this on your own. Was it selfish that a part of him just wanted to be looked at by you?

"You—"

"Toji, let it go!" You turn towards him, eyes bloodshot red. "Would you leave me alone? I told you I need to finish this. I don't need your constant mothering."

His jaw is clenched, and he isn't sure what he's feeling, but he hates it.

"How can I leave you here when you can't take care of yourself?"

"How would you even know what that looks like?" The words come out before you even understand their meaning and the hurt you're spurring with them.

Regardless of your outburst, he takes a few steps closer. He doesn't say anything. Reaching towards the desk, he starts closing your notebooks. His movements carry a subtle frustration, as if he's assigning blame to the papers for your moment of anger. A physical manifestation of his silent plea for you to step away from your relentless work. It was as if he believed shutting the pages would somehow shut the mounting pressure. He shuts your laptop last and you flinch.

You bite your lips, the taste of anxiety still lingering, and your gaze drops to the floor. Clasping your hands against your chest, you feel the erratic beat of your heart beneath your fingertips. Toji stops moving completely. He looks up, leaning his head back, and he closes his eyes. Everything is still for a second.

He moves his gaze to rest on the wall in front of you.

"You scared of me?"

The question takes you off guard, the weight of his words hanging in the air. It takes a few seconds for you to answer. A few seconds where he turns to look at you again. You shake your head, lips all wobbly.

"Then why won't you look at me?" His jaw is clenched, and his eyes are a darker shade than they were a few seconds ago. He seems more upset with himself than with you.

Are you scared of him? It seems rather unlikely when all you want to do is be closer to him. When it feels like his current proximity is nothing but distance.

"I'm scared of everything else but you," your tightened chest slowly unravels. "I'm sorry".

Your murmured "I'm sorry"s keep tumbling out of your mouth, and you're unaware that you've started to cry again.

Your hands wipe angrily at your cheeks but Toji stops you. His touch lands on your hands, bringing them away from your face. You feel his thumbs wipe away gently at your tears. His fingertips were way softer than yours. Your head felt hot.

"Don't cry."

Your eyes gaze up at him, and he feels relieved. In the haze of the moment, you sense his hands shaking. You stand up and let his hands fall away from your face. Instead, you grab them both and repeat the motions he first did to you when he walked into the room.

You inhale a breath, "I'm sorry I said that."

Toji's eyes soften as he watches you mirror his earlier actions. He allows you to guide his hands into yours, silently appreciating the small reversal of roles. The room is filled with heavy silence, broken by the occasional sniffle and the soft collision of your breaths.

Caught in a moment of vulnerability, Toji breaks the silence.

"You don't need to apologize to me, sweetheart. I just want you to take care of yourself."

You meet his gaze, sincerity evident on his face. His cold demeanor less apparent when he looks at you.

"I know," you whisper. 

The room, once filled with tension, now holds a fragile sense of contentment. It's far from perfect, but less stifling.

"I know you're under a lot of pressure," Toji continues, his hand now placed on the back of your head, cradling you. His thumb swipes across your jaw and neck. "But you can't let yourself fall under, especially not without me". He chooses his words carefully, his tone aloof. His protective demeanor is evident, making you question how you ever allowed doubt to cloud any coherent thought.

You were under a lot of pressure, but maybe, just maybe, you'd let yourself fall into him, without constraints—no warning signs, no reservations, and definitely no uncertainty.

—aurelia—