#todya has been wild my intrusive thoughts have convinced me my mom died twice today (shes in perfect health dw) and i think im finally
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floats gently facedown in a river & gets swept out to sea
#so u see im trans but visible in a very lowkey babysteps way i only just started going by my name a few months ago and i dont really hide th#at im trans i tell ppl my pronouns and stuff if they ask! but im shy i dont introduce myself w threm and i dont pass either so like i still#get misgendered n stuff but ppl use the right name at least now#ANWYAY. so like im out but not Out yk#anyway part 2 i was leaving a thing and someone ik pulled me aside and asked me a question on my preference for something gender segregated#and it was so thoughtful and kind and no one has done that for me before and i really didnt know what to do 😭 its really nice to know that#i can do things quietly and people will still notice and care (in the good way). i mean hes probably overheard my friends using he/him#pronouns for me but still it was so thoughtful and considerate :(#todya has been wild my intrusive thoughts have convinced me my mom died twice today (shes in perfect health dw) and i think im finally#discovering how to hold the small happinesses close each day and letting the suicidal ideation ease away and i think im figuring out how to#live better. im hoping im looking forward to the future again im breathing 1 heavens cloud at a time#n now im just laying here lsitening to this is a life mitski on repeat and feeling like wvery emotion#WELL. that was a really long rant(?) thanks for reading . how are u all :3#i wish i could erase the word like (filler word) from my vocab Its just progresively getting worse all i say is like 50 times a sentence 😭😭
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