#today has been a lot
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@.MapleLeafs: Fishbowl Flex
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a few more käärijä pics to end the day
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i've been trying to draw xz birthday art all day BUT I KEEP GETTING ATTACKED BY THE BIRTHDAY BOY HIMSELF PLEASE XZ HAVE MERCY
#xiao zhan#TODAY HAS BEEN A LOT#A STRUGGLE#A BATTLE AND I'M LOSING#BUT I HAVE ENJOYED EVERY DERANGED SECOND OF IT#HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIAO ZHAN ZHANZHAN BAOBEO DEAREST DARLING 💖💖💖#I HOPE YOU'VE HAD THE MOST LOVELY DAY TODAY AND MOST OF ALL I WISH ALL YOUR DAYS WILL BE THE BEST EVER#*BAOBEI JFC I'M TOO OVERWHELMED TO TYPE
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On a further life development...
One of my cats had gone missing. Please pray that he returns home :(
#this is so frustrating#today has been a lot#and I'm getting the flu too#which...for someone like me with asthma...it's infuriating#Ozzie please come back home :(
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……
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lando girlies how are we doing today
#i for one am#no words for it#today has been a lot#i woke up to suit lando pics and then had to go to CHURCH AND FOCUS#most difficult thing i've done frfr#love that man so much#on my knees for him#lando norris#mclaren
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....
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Great job to everyone at @phoenixwrightzine ! Everything is insanely high quality and I can’t wait to get a closer look!
#phoenix wright: ace attorney#Phoenix wright#Ipse facto#I’m a little lost for words at the moment#today has been a lot#but this is beautiful
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( out of the moonlight. ) writes one starter and then flatlines
#˗ˏˋ ooc. ⟶ ❛ faded reflections ❜#today has been a lot#gonna play p3r for a little bit and see how i feel tho#i am to the Chidori Part (november)#sooo
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I’ll be thinking about them a normal amount.
#a LIE#i will think about them an UNNORMAL AMOUNT#today has been a lot#and blondie could still make it crazier#jennzara#also i realized i was spelling their ship name wrong again :/#hsmtmts
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My genuine reaction -
I'm going through it, folks.
Idk how to process this
Like, one of my favorite writers following me? I-
I'm so honoured but so scared that my unhinged rambling/writing/thirsting will just drive her away 💀 (I'm sorry for that y'all)
#im just a puddle of emotions rn#like whoa#today has been a lot#a lot of goodness and idk how to process it#so gimme a minute#like deft ilysm you don't even know#I'm also extremely sorry for the shit that'll be on your feed cuz of me#like......#......#yeah........#ilysm tho <3333#stay golden deft dearest ;-; <3#author.deftinesia#celena.rambles#celena.reblogs
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#today has been a lot#today has been too much#cant take this#😿#i hate being embarrassed it makes me feel so bad#and it happened so much today#sorry im embarrassing#whoops#really#sorry#im going to hole up in my room and sleep and potentially cry#and not answer my phone#just so you know i probably havent killed myself#key word probably#NOOO GOOGLE JUST SENT ME A NOTIF ABOUT MY BIRTHDAY IM GONNA STRANGLE SOMETHING#bye
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That vibe when you’re trying not to sob because you deleted the last two and a half years of most all of your correspondence with your significant other including your first I love you’s and all the story’s you write together and promises you’ve made.
(Edit to make that make a little more sense, fix the your, and to add that it was an accident not a break up Lmao)
#I am aggressively distraught#it’s the equivalent of like#losing all my love letters in a house fire#today has been a lot
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I don’t know what I was expecting out of my neurosurgeon appointment today, but I certainly was not really prepared to hear “you absolutely have tethered cord AND Chiari,” and also “you’re a surgical candidate for TCS release”
I have been fighting for answers for years. Between my own research and literally drawing on my scans, no specialist (nor even my previous pcp) ever even believed I was having any of the issues I’ve been reporting, let alone *all* of them, and not receiving care fire. Surely I had to be receiving adequate care, or I was lying about the severity of what I’ve been trying to deal with.
Reader, I was still underreporting the amount of physical pain I’ve been in for years—partially because I’ve been told I’m “fine,” or “too young” my whole life and partially because I was already not being taken seriously.
In my exam today, my nuerosurgeon validated my years of lived experiences and my in depth research centered around finding my answers myself. She condemned previous doctors and specialists I’ve seen and the inadequate radiology reports. She drew on my imaging in the same way I did when I was trying to prove my need for specific specialists. She acknowledged my pain, and discomfort, and it was all very genuine, very unexpected, and very relieving.
I am so genuinely shocked, I don’t even know how to react. I could be having surgery as early as the middle of next month.
#which scares me for obvious reasons but also because we’re still in a PANDEMIC#but also I have real#concrete#irrefutable diagnoses#in my chart#and a plan of direct action#….what???#I am so shocked and so relieved I haven’t processed any of this#I will admit I do feel an odd sense of satisfaction for figuring these things out myself (and with the help of my physical therapist)#but holy hell#today has been a LOT#olive blogs#disability#disabled#tethered cord#chiari
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Gonna be pretty inactive for a bit
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crutches are out, my body is fried
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