#tobirama tuna time

[sanska]

Catch of the day

[wardernirvaan]

Maybe Nirvaan should've specified when he had requested for tuna not to be said. Salmon wasn't any better. However, he didn't even dare to say not to say that one either because he feared what the tiefling would say next. He'd already brought out the tuna, the salmon, the bonito flakes. Honestly, next up was probably the mustard leaves or the pork ribs or something else that could be put in rice balls. Assan had already made it clear that he had telepathy and the damn menace still decided to not use it. He was fucking with Nirvaan and the fey was only amused by it. Thank goodness he was hot or he would've started breaking things at the mere sound of the word 'salmon'. And thankfully, his urging had worked. If he was going to be the next Hokage, then he had to make sure he was prepared for anything. The Hokage absolutely could get dicked down, but he was also sure that Tobirama didn't have to worry about not being able to cum because he didn't have a damn menace as a boyfriend to tell him not to. This planet was a prison and Nirvaan had somehow got himself thrown into this hellscape. But it did feel great. Every thrust had him gripping the sheets and the way the other's lips felt against his skin made him want to write vows. But then he was reminded that he was just on the edge this entire time and it made that thought go away. All that pent up frustration was doing wonders though. He immediately brought their lips together as soon as he was flipped over. The warder didn't care about the house they were in or if there were any damages as he heard the bedframe hit the wall over and over again. His lips stayed melded to Assan's as he tried to catch his breath which was probably counterproductive, but he also didn't care. They only parted as he all but begged for a release. "Dude, please."

wardernirvaan​:

Backed up on it, Assan was a little amazed at how thick Nirvaan’s ass was, all things considered: for starters the warder was always talking about training when he should’ve been talking about eating. “Salmon.” Came the tiefling’s response to not being allowed to say Tuna, so what, was he just supposed to not talk at all. Appreciative hands jiggled the other’s ass a bit as he watched Nirvaan rock backwards against his cock, taking a bit more of it in before Assan pushed all the way in and settled there for a moment. His stomach growled again, even after everything that the tiefling had just eaten but maybe he’d get another treat after he finished inside of Assan. Long hair shifted back as the tiefling’s neck rolled backwards, pushing forward as he fucked into Nirvaan’s ass. So many months of anticipation hadn’t prepare dhim for this, for the feeling of the other constricting around him, loosened but tightening as he gripped onto Assan’s needy cock. Game time. The demigod’s fingers curled around Nirvaan’s shoulder as he unceremoniously took the other to pound town, full hammer time as his free hand curled around the warder’s swollen cock, still denied an orgasm he drove into the fey again and again. Pressing him down into the mattress and fucking him into that next as his lips attached themself to the curve Nirvaan’s neck, railing the eladrin with the tandem and speed that was indicative of any true demigod before he was tossing the fey back onto his back in an effortless flex of strength. Thrown around like loose pizza dough, he continued to pump Nirvaan’s cock in time with his own strokes, building the other’s peak with every deliberate movement. Ferocity shook the bed, the headboard dented the wall, poor casita deserved better so hopefully Cloe wouldn’t be too mad. 

[metoidionasty]

Tagged by my wife @bonesforsale

Comfort food: tuna casserole

Fave drinks: masala quick tea and bang candy apple and sour heads flavors

Something I collect: stuffed animals and records

Current fave songs:

All time favorite songs:

And uhhhhh I tag @tobirama-seppuku @squidnoises @kriri and uhhhh anyone who wants to do it

[drblueneck]

I haven’t read anything related to naruto IN A LONG TIME . It’s been a quiet year in the naruto fandom for me ((funny enough that I still remember the plot lines for other naruto fanfics thou, still missing Tuna Fish & Red Splattered Pages too)). I’ve been busy with Stardew Valley.

I've been in the BNHA fandom lately (I fucking LOVE that manga, it's so so so sooooo good, the story is epic af and I just love all the characters AND AAARRGGHHHH I don't want it to end (also, I've been writing an OS for rare pair Aizawa/Midoriya BECAUSE I'M WEAK and we need more stories with older quirkless Deku being a badass techie)) but if there is one fic I miss in the Naruto fandom, it's definitely The Lives Worth Saving, by cywsaphyre. It's what made me love time travel, but it's been discontinued a long time ago... a pity, it was really top notch!

Otherwise I find myself weary of the Naruto fandom, I only read Tobirama/Madara stories nowadays, but since it's a rare pairing, I don't have much to eat 😩

As for Stardew Valley, I didn't know that game, I'm not really into RPG as I'm more of an adventure/action gamer (can we just have a "HELL YEAH" for Ratchet & Clank's last opus "Rift Apart"? I might have cried a little when it was announced) but I feel like it's the kind of games you grow addicted too, I really like how it's presented as it reminds me of old school Zelda and Pokemon... aaah, to be a kid again, playing on your Gameboy Color... #nostalgia

[raendown]

Can I just say how hilarious I find the image of both the Uchiha and Senju gaping at Tobirama casually feeding that big ass fox that just crashed their fight a sandwich?

“Tuna fish,” Tobirama intoned solemnly to the man several feet at his side. 

Madara gaped a little wider, tempted to rub his eyes for a third time just to be absolutely sure that he was seeing this correctly. 

“Higher, brat,” the massive chakra beast snarled. “I’m not as short as all you tiny humans!”

With a put-upon sigh Tobirama lifted his hand a little higher to hold the desired treat above his head, not quite understanding why everyone present was staring at him in such a manner. And here he’d thought it was common knowledge that foxes enjoy tuna fish sandwiches. 

[elphabun]

If you're dong prompts at the moment could you please write Madatobi for the "My cat keeps going to your house to eat and you got my number off the new collar I gave him�� AU

Sorry this took so long! I kind of lost the doc it was on haha. Hope you enjoy :)Also on AO3

“What the—” Madara yelps and jumps back almost half a foot, trips over a shoe and falls hard onto his side.

Seething, he glares at the grey and white ball of fluff staring down at him from atop his fridge.

“You little shit,” he curses and picks himself up off the floor. “If you kill me you’re not getting any food, just so you know.”

It only cocks its head and purrs.

The damn cat has been breaking into his apartment almost every day for the past two weeks. First it had been eating the the leftover sandwiches on the counter, then when Madara stopped leaving food out it figured out how to open the fridge. In the interests of keeping his food safe, Madara now buys tuna for the little monster.

He groans at the twinge in his ribs and walks over to the pantry, the cat jumping down and following him. He takes out a can of tuna and the cat meows and tries to jump up his body to reach it.

“Nuh-uh.” He pushes it away with his foot.

He sets the can on the counter and as soon as he opens it the cat is right there gorging itself. Madara runs a hand down its back, snorting at the fat he feels. He rubs up to the cat’s neck and frowns when his hand hits something. He grabs at it and pushes fur away from the spot to see a pale blue collar wrapped around the neck.

Huh, Madara thinks. That wasn’t there before. He feels at the front of the collar and pulls a tag away from its neck. Raijin, it reads, and there’s a phone number underneath. Madara smiles and takes out his phone. Finally, he can get rid of this cat. Whoever it is that owns it better keep a damn leash on it now that Madara knows it’s not a stray.

He dials the number and the call is answered with a low growl. Madara frowns, confused, and then– “What?” The word is sharp, and Madara bristles.

“Your cat is in my apartment. Come get it,” Madara practically demands.

There’s a pause while the person on the other line processes, and then a sigh. “What apartment are you?” The man asks, sounding a mix of relieved and exasperated.

“212. It’s right by the fire stairs,” Madara says, and then the call goes dead.

Madara pulls the phone away and looks at it. That guy actually hung up on him. He scowls and starts rubbing the cat again.

Ten minutes later, Madara is trying to keep the cat from scratching up his couch when there’s a knock at the door. Oh thank fuck.

“Coming,” he yells and pulls away from the cat, wincing at the stinging pain on his hands as he walks over.

He opens the door and there’s a white-haired man standing before him, looking somewhat familiar, though Madara doesn’t know where he’s seen him before. The man’s face is blank, and Madara gestures inside.

“Come in, your cat is destroying my couch,” he says through a tight smile.

The man gives him a short nod and walks in, looks around, then goes straight for where the cat is now scratching up a pillow.

“Raijin,” he scolds, scooping the devil animal up.

Madara looks despairingly at the tears on his favorite pillow, and the marks on the base of his couch. The guy turns to him, and Madara glares at the cat cradled in his arms.

“I’m Tobirama,” the man says, holding a hand out to Madara. “Sorry for any inconvenience Raijin has caused you; she’s normally very well-behaved.”

Madara doesn’t believe that for a second, but he huffs and shakes the hand anyways. Internally he’s trying to think. The name Tobirama sounds really familiar.

“Yeah, whatever,” he grumbles. “I blew 20 dollars feeding that monster, and it repaid me by ruining my pillows.”

Tobirama looks a bit embarrassed at that, and Madara is viciously satisfied. If he can’t keep his pet from running off and complicating other people’s lives, then he should be embarrassed.

“Right,” Tobirama says, leaning forward. “If you want I could make it up to you,” he suggests. “Buy you a dinner.”

That… isn’t such a bad idea, actually. Disregarding the irresponsible pet ownership, Tobirama is attractive and Madara knows they’ve met sometime before. Friend of a friend, probably, so it wouldn’t be too bad.

He shrugs. “Alright, that sounds good. Tomorrow maybe?”

Tobirama smiles and nods. Madara realizes that he never actually introduced himself and his face flushes.

“I’m Madara Uchiha, by the way,” he blurts out, the embarrassed one now.

Tobirama raises an eyebrow. “I know.”

Madara frowns and asks, “How, exactly?” Is he going to find out where he knows Tobirama from?

“I was at Hashirama’s birthday party last month,” Tobirama says with an air of amusement that makes Madara feel judged.

Wait.

“You’re Tobi?” He asks, incredulous. How did he not remember the name of his brother’s best friend? Hashirama never shuts up about him.

This time Tobirama actually laughs. “Yes, I am.”

Madara’s cheeks burns even more and he crosses his arms over his chest. “Whatever,” he says. “It’s completely understandable. I always tune Hashirama out whenever he starts going on about his friends because he’ll go on for fifteen minutes.”

Tobirama snorts. “He does the same about you, but at least I pay attention.”

Madara is about to retort but then the cat breaks into the conversation with a yowl and Madara jerks back when it leaps out of Tobirama’s arms and runs out the door. Madara is glad to see it go.

Tobirama sighs and looks put-out. “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow then,” he says and moves forward.

Madara nods and walks with him to the door. “See you,” he says and waves a bit as Tobirama walks out.

Tobirama gives him a little smile and goes of in pursuit of his cat.

Bonus: “I can’t believe your demon cat burglar was Tobi’s cat!” Hashirama laughs so hard he almost falls off of his chair, and Madara is tempted to shove him the rest of the way.

“Shut up,” he grumbles, his face pink.

Hashirama laughs again. “And you’re going out with him? I’m so happy for you two!”

Madara huffs and crosses his arms. “It’s one dinner, not a date. He’s making up for his cat costing me a bunch of money in tuna,” he says, looking determinedly away.

Hashirama snorts. “Sure it is. Oh well, it’ll happen sooner or later. You two will get along so well.”

Madara watches in disgust as his friend starts sniffling.

“My brother and my best friend. I’m such a lucky person,” Hashirama says, a hand placed dramatically over his heart.

Right, time to leave. Madara stands and stalks to the door, pushing Hashirama’s chair over as he passes. Ah, what a wonderful sound, Madara thinks as Hashirama shrieks and crashes to the floor.