#to my therapist and parents (who suddenly became a fountain of excuses for them)
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and even then, that won't help if you're institutionalized as a minor.
You wanna actually help institutionalized mentally ill people? Get them legal help. Post their rights on the walls. Give them access to phones and lawyers. “My small business sells cutsie scrubs for inpatients!!!” literally nobody cares what they are wearing in the fucking hospital but you Becca. shut the fuck up
#my rights (which WERE helpfully posted on the walls) were violated many times#in various loopholey ways that were transparently about keeping them out of trouble#for example they'dfind clever ways to not let you eat while having some paper thin excuse of you're not “safe” to be in whatever eating are#(generalized language cause I've been to ten of these places(#same for not letting you use the bathroom#though one time they went full mask off and said “you talk back so i don't want to open the bathroom for you”#every time I'd complain to the shift leads (who were often the ones doing it)#to my therapist and parents (who suddenly became a fountain of excuses for them)#to those little complaint forms (four years and i never once got answered.)#there was literally Nothing i could do#or if there was my FOURTEEN YEAR OLD SELF was not properly informed of it#this isn't even getting into all the times i got physically assaulted by other patients and basically morning was done#i got beat up 7 times in 14 days at one ward#guess what they did when they noticed the very obvious pattern of me getting targeted by violence?#NOTHING#they literally even had a 2nd ward for my age group THAT I HAD BEEN IN PREVIOUSLY but nooooooo they couldn't move me!#that's too much WORK#meanwhile i went to sleep with hair pulled out of my scalp and bruises forming on the back of my neck#and don't even get me STARTED on how many medications they put me on and didn't tell me the side effects EVEN WHEN I ASKED#i took antipsycotics for multiple YEARS not knowing they were the cause of my sudden & unexpected weight gain#and involuntary movements and general body fuckery#and they made me take it in the MORNING and then i got in trouble if i was sleeping during the day#EVEN THOUGH IT CAUSES DROWSINESS AND I WAS TAKING A QUITE HIGH DOSE?? AT SEVEN IN THE MORNING???#jesus. i'm sorry for the rant#4 years.#4 years of this#it's over but idk if i'll ever truly heal 😚🤣😜!!!#antipsychiatry
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