#to make matters worse i decided to go for the whole kinda-enemies-to-lovers vibe and it's killing me

[corrodedbisexual]

Brain completely drained. Don't know if I'll even participate in Steddie week beyond maybe short tumblr ficlets which sucks because I had ideas 😭

[rightsockjin]

Summary: SCOOBY DOO AU! Seokjin and his dog Jjangu, have a special bond, one that no one could ever challenge and it was absolutely adorable. They were always paired up to scope out the place, but when Namjoon decides to pair the team off differently and you get stuck with him instead, things take a turn for the worst…or is it for the best? ZOINKS!

Rating: M

Genre: SMUT! Mystery. Slight enemy to lover

Warnings: Food play, fingers. licking, sucking. Cunnalingus. lewd noises. Walked in on kinda. Jin is thirsty. Y/N is thirsty. Both have a meal. Moaning. Haunted house. 

Word count: 4,887

Author’s note: This is so loosely based off of Scooby Doo it almost doesn’t make sense to say it is based off of it but it’s more about the vibe of Jin’s outfit. Also! Spooky season had begun! And this is a good kick off.

“Jin and Y/N, can you guys check out the west wing?”

With those eleven words from the leader’s lips, the whole dynamic of the group was turned around. Jjangu whined at his feet. His cute puppy eyes stared up at him like he knew he would be separated from his owner soon. This wasn’t normal. He usually wasn’t paired up with anyone. It was usually him and Jjangu against whatever crazy conspiracy they were checking out which always made him feel safer because dogs tended to have a sixth sense that most people lacked, but you had joined and now it seemed that he’d have to endure the presence of another person.

This wouldn’t have been a problem had it been anyone else but Namjoon knew Jin had a slight crush on you that he didn’t know how to handle and it seemed like Namjoon was just trying to push his buttons. You didn’t even like him anyway. He knew that. It was in the way that you looked at Taehyung and the way you laughed at his jokes and how close you seemed to be. He had no interest in being your second choice. No interest whatsoever but it seemed that Namjoon, the ever observant nearly omniscient leader, hadn’t noticed what he had.

“I’m going to take Jjangu with Jungkook and I-” the leader began but Jin cut him off instantly.

“Why can’t he come with me?”

Namjoon glanced at you out of the corner of his eyes for a split second, but you were too focused on Taehyung- again- to even notice. Jin gave the leader a look that had embedded a question.

Namjoon rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.

“JK  and I are going to the most arguably haunted part of the house and I doubt highly that Jk’s muscles will do much if we can’t see what’s around the corner. You know that Jjangu is much better at warning us when there’s something afoot.”

Jin’s heart sank. Namjoon had a point. The east wing had the most noise coming from it and he was arguably in more danger than he would be. Jjangu was a valuable asset. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to argue.

“But then what about me? I’m never paired up without him! Look at his puppy eyes…”

Namjoon indulged him but wasn’t deterred, “I need him Jin. You have an actual human with you this time.”

“So do you! And Jungkook had muscles! Y/N is built like a damn noodle.”

“Hey!”

Jin snapped his head to look at you, unamused with your interjection.

“Tell me I’m wrong, doll face.”

You glared at him, mirroring his crossed arms, then looked back at Namjoon expectantly. When he said nothing she scoffed.

“I don’t want to go with him if he doesn’t want me there. Just let me go with Taehyung or something-”

“No,” Namjoon interrupted, “Look, you wanted to come along and as much as we enjoy having you around, this is serious business. Things can go very wrong in one of our missions and it’s my call as to what happens. I need you to do as I say. It’s for everyone’s best interest.”

He turned to Jin then, “You know better than to question me. Just do it. We don’t have a lot of time.”

Jin slumped but knew he had a point. He glanced over at you, “I’m sorry. He’s right.”

He gave Jjangu a sad smile and like he had just spoken directly to him, the puppy walked over to Namjoon and sat with a diligent growl. Satisfied, Namjoon looked at his team who split into their otherwise usual groups- Joon and JK, Yoongi and Hope, Jimin and Taehyung- then looked at Jin and yourself.

Reluctantly, Jin walked over and stood by you. How could he have known from the way you filched at his proximity that in a matter of minutes he’d have you bent over a table and his face would be buried in your lower lips?

The answer? He couldn’t have known, but he’d have to thank Namjoon later.

It was silent as you both walked into the hallway that led into the west wing, contrary to the reports of screams and moaning that had brought the extended mystery gang to investigate. In a way, it made it even more creepy. The flickering of the lights that lined the walls made you jump and the cool air seemed to nip at your skin. Why had you worn a skirt to investigate a haunting? What made you think that your orange corduroy skirt and a maroon turtleneck would keep you warm in the near middle of winter in Seoul? Nothing. Nothing had told you this was a good idea, except for that stupid voice in your head that told you that maybe, just maybe, Jin would finally look at you as something more than an annoying girl who clung onto his friend group.

Though judging by his reaction only seconds before, it wasn’t looking good. Namjoon had done you a solid back there after you had confessed to him that you had a massive crush on Jin but it seemed that your attempts and his help were fruitless.

Up ahead, you could see a multitude of doors. As you walked, the wooden floor of the manor creaked and once again you jumped. Jin, having been ignoring your reactions for the last ten minutes, chose this instance to acknowledge your existence.

He sighed, his shoulder slumping as he slowly turned to look at you.

“Are you sure you’re cut out to be scouting, Y/N?”

No. You were not sure you were. You were easily frightened and the occult wasn’t your cup of tea but Namjoon had assured you it wouldn’t be horrible as places like these were usually a hoax but you saw no cameras. No signs of rigs or traps. You saw nothing to suggest a hoax.

“Y-yeah. Totally.”

It was then that another loud creak and a prolonged, pained moan vibrated through the hallway that you and Jin were in. You felt all the blood drain from your face and a shiver of fear ran straight through you like the ghost that was supposed to haunt these rooms.

Jin watched you in shock. Usually, he was every bit as scared as you seemed but something had possessed him and instead of fear, he was filled with worry and determination. He had a job to do and the quicker he cleared your side of the manor, the quicker he could get you out of the house.

“It’s probably nothing,” he assured you, “probably one of the guys trying to freak us out. Come on.”

The firmness in his voice surprised him. It didn’t waver. It was strong. Confident. A shiver went down your back completely unrelated to the coldness of the season.

He took a step over to the first door on his left but when he didn’t hear your booted steps behind him he stopped and looked over his shoulder. You hadn’t moved at all. He let his eyes rake your body but only for a second. And a second was all he needed. The way that your long legs were framed by the slightly too short skirt made his mind run wild with thoughts too unholy to entertain. Why had you worn something so inappropriate for such an occasion? Namjoon’s words came back to him then.

“She likes you.” He had said. Had he been right? Had you maybe worn the deceivingly tight shirt with- were you even wearing a bra? Jesus you mustn’t be with the way that your breasts were outlined so perfectly against the thin fabric of your turtle neck. He shook his head as blood began to collect in an unfavorable place. This wasn’t what you guys were there for.

With exasperation and a little bit of nerves running through his body, he reached out and grabbed your hand pulling you forward.

You stumbled but didn’t fall. His hand in yours made you feel less alone in the slightly darkened house. You could smell the dust in the air and something that smelled like… apples and musk.

Jin hesitated for only a second longer before he wrapped his long fingers around the brass knob. It was cold to the touch. Unlike your hand in his.

The room was dark and the last thing he wanted to do was throw you into the unknown. He felt around for a light switch. Instantly, the hum of machines filled your ears. An unappealing white light filled your field of vision, blinding you slightly.

Briefly, Jin’s hand tightened around yours as he ventured further into the room. As soon as you were in, the door that Jin had opened, slammed shut, hitting your ass and pushing you farther in.

“Ow! What the- did…did that just close on it’s own?” Without thinking, you clung onto Jin’s arm and hid behind his towering figure. Jin felt his stomach drop, though he wasn’t sure if it was because of you clinging to him, or the door.

Decisively, Jin took a step towards the door and tried to open it. Unsurprisingly, it was jammed. His heart sank. He was trapped in a room in a house that was supposedly haunted. This could not be worse. You could have been with Jungkook who had the muscles to protect you, or with Taehyung, who had no fear in the face of danger, or even with Namjoon, who always had a plan, but no… you were stuck with him and he felt guilty.

Would he be able to protect you if something really dangerous happened? Given, these expeditions didn’t usually turn truly dangerous but in the case it did, would he step up? Or would he fall into his old ways and leave you to fend for yourself?

“It must have been a draft or something… and the wood is probably swollen from age… It’s nothing,” he assured, though he wasn’t sure himself.

Jin turned back around to look at the rest of the room. What would Namjoon do? Scope out the room and find another way out. He was met with a larger than normal looking kitchen. The hum from the refrigerator seemed to drone on and on.

There was an oven and a stove. Some carts to wheel food, multiple counters covered in what looked like… fresh fruit?

Curious, Jin took a step forward. A loud crack of what seemed to be a speaker echoed in the room. Fear ran through Jin’s body and instinctively, he jumped behind you. He used your small body as a shield, his front pressed firmly to your back side.

Through the fabric of his pants, you could feel…something, lightly poking you. It was just a hint. The idea of something you hadn’t realized you might be able to have, to evoke in him. It was thrilling to say the least. Confusing at its core.

Oh.. unfortunate choice of words.

And suddenly, you weren’t exactly scared anymore. At least not for the same reason. What had Namjoon said to you earlier? That these places were usually not haunted but set up to seem so. What did you have to fear?

Only one thing. Rejection.

Subtly, you pushed your ass back into what you hoped was the beginning of a hard on. There was a road that led from hate straight to love and lust. If you could push just the right buttons, then maybe, your situation could change.

Jin was panicking. And for once, it wasn’t because he was the only one who thought that the house they were investigating was truly haunted. No, it was for something much less precedent.

You.

As soon as he had felt you shift ever so slightly against him and your round, plush…strong, ass grazed against his excited member he knew. He just knew he was screwed. Well… if he was lucky. Should he push? Should he pry…your legs apart…

Over your shoulder, he chanced an inquisitive glance down. He was met instantly with the curve and slope of your perfect breast. Through the fabric, once again he was forced to notice the peaking of what he imagined to be your nipples.

The outline of something textured was also present. Jin found his fingers twitching from your arms to try and touch it. But he couldn’t. Not without knowing that you wanted him to.

Again, as if you were reading his mind, you pressed your backside into his pelvis. Were you doing it on purpose? It almost felt like it could be an accident. He couldn’t tell.

Carefully, you took a step away from Jin. He let his grip on you fall as you walked with no intent present towards the table covered in food.

He could see a bowl full of something white and very near it what he assumed were strawberries. Perhaps, chocolate sauce. Honey? He wasn’t sure from his vantage point. With legs heavy as bricks, Jin walked closer to the same table. Your back was still to him and he was partially grateful for that since there was something else heavy between his thighs that was making it hard to move.

As he neared you, you listened. His footsteps echoed in the vast kitchen. Intent absent but curiosity present. You didn’t have a plan. Not something tangible. But you had felt it. The hope that blossomed between your back and his pelvis.

So without taking a second to consider what it was that you were doing. You bent yourself nearly in half and dipped a finger in what looked like caramel sauce.  The breeze hit you almost instantly.

Jin watched in shock as your skirt rose up the short amount it could. But what was more of a shock, a surprise, was not that your skirt was pulled up over your ass or the fact that it was being so readily presented to him. No, it was instead the fact that your ass and lower was bare. A thin strip of fabric the same color of your turtle neck ran up your round cheeks, separating them slightly. The same fabric covered your core. A mark of wetness stained it.

As quietly as he could, he slapped his own cheek. Once, then twice, then once more for good measure but still you were bent in half and your skin was on display. For him. It had to be for him.

He watched as you dipped your finger into the runny substance nearest you. You hooked it. A glob of the substance clung to it, then oozed slowly down and back in the bowl. Jin watched, his mouth dry as your pink tongue darted out of your mouth and intercepted the substance.

A thick glob landed on it but you didn’t pull it into your lips. Instead, you let the liquid like substance drip down and onto your chin and progressively back into the bowl. It was a couple of seconds later that you finally pulled your tongue back where it should be and hummed delighted.

“You should taste this caramel Jin,” you said, your voice had lowered an octave and it did things to his now very hard member.

“Sh-,” he cleared his throat, “Shouldn’t you not eat that? I- I mean… it could be poisoned.”

You chuckled. Idiot. Why hadn’t that crossed your mind? Well… honestly if you were gonna die then you guessed deliciously was the best way to go. And with some good cock to be the cherry on top.

“Best poison I’ve ever tasted,” you joked, licking at your chin and your lips. Without hesitation, you dipped the same finger into the whipped cream in the bowl next to the strawberries.

You didn’t mess around. You put your whole finger in your mouth and suck it clean of any and all sugar.

You made a show of it. Tilting your head back and arching your spine in further presentation of your private area. You moaned around your finger.

“You’re crazy,” Jin said from behind you and you deflated slightly, feeling embarrassed. Shouldn’t he have jumped your bones by now? Ravaged you? Shouldn’t he have had some reaction aside from talking about what you were eating? For God’s sake, you were ass up and legs spread to him.

Shouldn’t he… have at least taken a step closer to you?

Slowly, and unsure of what the hell had gotten into you, you began to straighten. How could you have thought that this would work? Jin clearly didn’t like you. Namjoon had lied and whatever you had thought you had felt was all in your head.

But then there was a warm hand on your lower back. Fingers splayed and pushing to keep you arched. Pressed up. Another hand, ever so gently, and delicately, began to run up one of your thighs. It was a feather light touch. If you weren’t so present and sensitive you may not have even felt it. But then he was at your inner thigh, writing hangul into the skin.

“I didn’t say you should stop,” he whispered. His breath was warm on your shoulder. You were frozen. What did you do now?

“Do- would you like to try some?” You asked, almost like a waitress offering a house wine.

Jin didn’t know how to proceed. But he wasn’t going to let this opportunity pass him up.

“Hand me a strawberry,” he said and you did so quickly.

You picked the first one you saw right off the top and held it up for him. Instead of taking either hand off of you, he learned down and wrapped his plush lips around the tip and sucked the fruit into his mouth.

Red juice oozed out of the corner of his lips. You licked your own as his hand moved up slightly. His palm barely graced your exposed skin.

“Delicious,” he groaned, watching your mouth.

You weren’t even sure what he was talking about but boy did you want to find out.

“Want a taste?”

He didn’t wait for you to answer. Instead, he reached over your head, his hips pressed against the bareness of your butt and his chest touched over your shoulders. The warmth that radiated from his body made goosebumps break out in the places that weren’t touching him.

He plucked a particularly juicy strawberry from the cluster and twirled it in front of your face. Your mouth watered. You waited patiently as he seemed to be admiring the perfectness of the fruit before he dipped it into the whipped cream and brought it to your lips.

“Open,” he breathed by your ear. You let your jaw fall into a perfect ‘O’ as he brought it closer to you. Slowly, almost as if he were the one enjoying the flavor, he placed it on your tongue. You waited for him to speak. To tell you what to do. But when no command came, you closed your mouth and bit down.

A symphony of juices met your taste buds. The fruit was sweet and delectable. Tart but cut with the sugar of the whip.

Jin’s member throbbed in it’s restraints. The pure pleasure that was evident on the part of your face he could see was enchanting. Drops of strawberry juice dripped down his long finger and onto his wrist.

You didn’t wait for him to ask. You licked the delicious juice from his skin. The wet muscle picking up every last drop. Somehow, it tasted better from his hand than it would have from your own. Somehow you knew this.

Jin let out a muffled moan. If your tongue felt that good on his finger, he could only imagine how good it would feel elsewhere. All over him. Jin’s hand suddenly cupped your burning core.  A gush of your own juices flowed out of you at the contact.

“You know,” Jin said as you continued to suck at his fingers greedily, “ these strawberries are delectable but… I have the feeling that they’re nowhere nearly as sweet as you?”

It was a question. He was asking you if he could have a taste. Of you. Of the juices that came from within you. How could you refuse?

Slowly, you nodded your consent. Without skipping a beat, his fingers pressed softly into your mounds and he pulled himself off of you.

You felt him squat behind you. His face now level with your center. You heard him gasp. His hand fell away. You felt self-conscious but you held yourself how you were. The taste of the fruit was still present on your tongue.

“No underwear?”

You swallowed the lump of embarrassment in your throat before you spoke, “No-not really. The shirt had a b-built in set-” A kiss on your thigh stopped your explanation.

Jin looked at your slits with the eyes of hunger. He had never felt more ravenous in his whole life. He had a feeling he could never get his fill.

A glint of silver caught his eye. Clips, where the shirt was held together at your core. With trembling hands, he hooked a finger under it and pulled it away from your skin. Already, his finger was coated in your slick. Excitement coursed through him, but he had to be patient.

He pulled at the clips and they came apart easily. A gust of cool air hit your slick slits and you couldn’t help but moan.

Jin let out an impressed whistle. He licked his thick lips. But first…

“Can you pull your shirt up?” he asked you. He held himself at bay even when your arousal hit his nose. His mouth was watering. Saliva pooled on his tongue.

You did what he asked, pulling the shirt out of the skirt and up over your breasts exposing your completely transparent bralette. From where he was sitting, he could vaguely make out the swell of your breast and the peak of your nipple, as pert and perfect as the strawberry that he had picked up earlier.

Finally satisfied, he shuffled a little closed to your center and took a deep breath. Shiver ran down your legs and your spine. Jin didn’t know where to start. Every angle of you looked delectable. Like a full course meal. Did he start with the potatoes or the beef? Did he skip and go straight for the desert?

He decided that he wanted to better see what was being offered to him. So carefully, he pulled your lower lips apart. Thick strands of slick webbed your labia together. Instantly, like the sauce from earlier, it began to drip from the quantity and weight of it.

Jin’s eyes widened. More was dripping out of your entrance, like a fountain. Still he held back, feeling the need to check on you one last time and ask for a final favor before he began his meal.

“If it’s okay with you, I don’t like to eat alone. I would like it if you ate with me.”

You weren’t sure exactly what he meant. But you were eager to please. So you nodded and did the only logical thing you could think of. You picked up another one of the strawberries and held it up for him to see. When you felt him pat your leg in confirmation, you put the fruit in your mouth.

Jin, feeling like he finally had the go ahead, leaned in. His mouth hung open, his tongue poking over his bottom lip. He shut his eyes, intent on enjoying what was sure to be his favorite new meal.

His tongue lightly but not limply slotted between your slits and you felt your whole body convulse. You choked on the fruit in your mouth. You coughed and sputtered but Jin didn’t feel phased.

The very tip of his tongue was grazing your clit. It was torturous. The lack of movement. You wanted more. You need him to give you more.

Then as if he had heard your thoughts, hit wet muscles suddenly moved up to your hole. It prodded at it before he suctioned his lips to the circumference and drank your essence.

You moaned through another mouthful of strawberry. It made a wave of pleasure run over Jin’s body. He groaned into your body. Sucking and pushing his tongue into your core. He fucked it into your heat as deep as he could make it go.

You sucked at the strawberry in your hand, scared to take another bite but too into what he asked to stop all together.

“Fuck, Jin I-”

He pulled away with a wet pop of his lips. You could hear him smack his lips, then he sighed happily.

“Don’t tempt me with that mouth Jagiya,” you said pressing a kiss to your pulsing clit. You shivered as he rubbed his lips over it. Shock after shock of elation ran into your stomach. You were close. You were so close. The cold of the room and the heat of your arousal contrasted so well. A heap of sensations that you didn’t realize you liked all added up to something that made your legs weak at the knees.

Maybe it was because Jin was the one between your legs. You weren’t sure.

He began to kitten lick at your bud. Your knees began to cave but you held yourself up with your arms. It was too good. Too much.

“Jin, please I’m going to…ah.. I’m gonna-”

But he didn’t answer. He only continued his ministrations. Licking harder, slower. Moaning against your bundle of nerves. With every hard lick came a wave of heat that coiled into what you knew would be a hard orgasm.

“Don’t stop… please,” you begged. And he didn’t. Delicious. His tongue was the definition of heaven and all things good.

He let go of your lower lips and held your thighs up to his mouth. You were on the edge. Your blood pulsed at the speed of light between your legs. Then, the coil snapped and you saw white. Your body pulsed, your mouth dropped and your whole body tensed.

You moaned Jin’s name not thinking about your volume. Not caring either. He kept going, not caring that you seemed done.

You were too delicious. Too sweet to let go. Like honey or butter scotch. God, he could eat you out all night long. He could live happily between your legs. He wanted to. He would love to be attached to you this way. God what a wonderful gift to be able to taste you like he was doing that instant. He let up on your clit but had no intentions of pulling away. He drank up your cum like it was the first sip of water he had ever had. Your entrance clenched as he dipped his tongue in and moaned and groaned and ate like the king he was.

Gluttony was a sin. But he’d be damned to give this up.

Suddenly, you both heard footsteps from outside the door. Jin froze, his lips again stuck to your entrance. Your body was weak and overstimulated. Neither of you dared to make any noise.

The familiar voices of the guys could be heard but they were muffled through the wall. You expected Jin to pull away from you but were surprised when he went right back to his suckling.

“Jin, “ you whined, pulling yourself away, but he followed, slurping noisily and moaning against you.

“Seokjin,” you said again, hoping he would stop but it was like he was deaf.

“I’m sure they came this way,” you heard what you thought was the voice of Hoseok from outside.

“It was a bad idea to give them this section,” a voice that sounded a lot like Jimin said, “If I remember correctly, I think  the kitchen is right over here.”

Again, Jin moaned from between your legs. A new orgasm was begging to build at your core. Coming much faster and stronger. You bit your lip to try and keep your gasps of pleasure at bay.

He reached up with a single finger and began to rub tight circles on your clit. You couldn’t help the scream that escaped you.

The footsteps outside the room stopped. You could almost hear the confusion and fear from the other side.

“Did you hear that,” What sounded like Jungkook asked.

“Y-yeah,” someone else, possibly Taehyung answered.

“Did that sound like-”

“That sounded like-”

And then Jjangu barked at the door and you knew. You just knew that you were screwed.

Then it hit you. An orgasm so strong it felt like an explosion. Like Dynamite. You moaned loudly, not being able to stop. The barking got louder and there were knocks at the door. Screams of your name and Jin’s but, he was much faster than you anticipated. He pulled his mouth from your core and flipped your around. He connected his messy lips with yours and pulled your shirt over your perfect chest.

When the door opened, he didn’t stop. His body covered yours. And you didn’t see their reaction but it must have been priceless because all you heard were shocked gasps from your group of friends, then the slam of a door.

You guessed Namjoon was right.

Master list

[goodluckchenle]

your love would be too much

pairing: haechan x gender neutral!reader genre: ANGST vibes: enemies to lovers, trainee!au, tw for body shaming , anxiety attack , yelling , swearing , NO HAPPY ENDING word count: 6k

author’s note: aaaaaaaaa this took so l o n g. i spent forever and a day writing it but i’m kinda proud of it! definitely didn’t proof read the last couple of paragraphs but it’s Fine

you and haechan should've been friends, or at least that’s what everyone else thought. you were the same age, you’d auditioned for sm at the same time, and you were widely regarded as two of the most talented 2000 line trainees. the two of you had a lot in common, but one thing stood out beyond the rest of your shared qualities: you’d both never hated anyone more in your entire life.

if opposites attract then you and haechan were practically the same person. all you did was get on each other’s nerves. you liked to think that you were a mature person, someone who chose to take the high road, but when it came to haechan all bets were off. the two of you were petty in every way imaginable; you took every chance to get under each other’s skin. you would go out of your way to make haechan’s day worse, and he did the same. your relationship wasn’t hard to understand; it was sneers in the hallway and cruel insults under your breath. it was looking him in the eye as you took his favorite sandwich in the cafeteria or him clicking his tongue just because it drove you insane. it was simple, it was immature, and it was petty. and you still did it anyway.

the funny thing was that no one could’ve told you how it started. everyone’d just kinda assumed something went down one day, but the truth was you didn’t really have a reason to hate haechan except that he hated you. if you thought at least a little bit about your relationship you could probably figure out that there was no fair reason for you two to hate each other, you just rubbed each other wrong and neither of you were humble enough to back down. but we don’t talk about that. the point is, lee donghyuck was your least favorite person in the world, and it was always going to be that way.

but no matter how much you hated him, the trainee grind went on. which meant that you could never truly avoid each other. today was your monthly performance evaluation and as fate would have it, you and haechan went one after another. you were first up. you’d prepared for this performance like it was your last, practicing the choreography for weeks and memorizing every run and adlib until you could sing them in your sleep. you had chosen this song even though it was a challenge and you were proud of how far you’d come to be able to pull it off. after you finished you bowed deeply to the trainers and bit back a smile when you saw the awe on your fellow trainee’s faces. but as you returned to your spot in line, you heard haechan scoff under his breath. you raised an eyebrow.

“got something you’d like to say, donghyuck?” you said quietly, emphasising his name. the moment lee sooman had changed his name haechan let it go straight to his head and you refused to feed his ravenous ego. 

“not really,” haechan quipped back. “just that maybe you should try not to do something so...above you. watching you butcher that was painful and the fake smile didn’t help.” you scowled as his name was called and haechan stepped forward, bowing with a charming smile as he introduced himself to the coaches. right before he started his performance he looked you in the eye, and you swore you could feel rage bubbling up within you.

haechan was infuriatingly impressive. he’d picked a song that played to his strengths and his facial expressions were on point, two areas that were still stinging after his comments earlier. you kept a straight face as he performed, imagining all the things you’d say as soon as you walked out of this room. unsurprisingly the other trainees were enthralled with haechan’s performance but when he made his way back his eyes were only on you, one eyebrow cocked in a confident smirk. now it was your turn to scoff.

“you know, that was actually a smart choice,” you muttered so only he could hear. “play it safe and you won’t disappoint anyone. but maybe turn down the facial expressions a smidge? felt like i was watching a third-rate comedy sketch.” you relished the look on his face as he struggled to remain nonchalant. you shrugged and turned towards the trainee about to perform, leaving haechan to stew in the silence between you two. you were sure this wasn’t over, but did you really want it to be? you were almost looking forward to the fight you knew was coming.

the moment you left the room all eyes were on you and haechan. you wouldn’t say that the two of you made your hatred public, but you definitely didn’t try to keep it private. you were sure haechan felt the same way; you both felt fully justified in your distaste for the other and you kinda expected everyone else to take your side. to be honest haechan's friends thought the whole thing was kind of ridiculous and as for you, well you didn't have anyone close enough to care. you were a little annoyed by the audience you'd amassed but you would never let that stop you. however you needn’t worry; the moment you'd cleared the doorway haechan was already on you. "you always have something to say, don't you?" he said, glaring. you couldn't help but chuckle.  

"and you don't?" you shot back. "you literally started this conversation."

“i wouldn’t have, but i just couldn’t bear the thought of you actually thinking whatever you did back there was ‘art’.” more infuriating than his words was his tone, one that dripped with condescension and mockery. unfortunately, you were never one to back down.

“ah yes. because you’re clearly the expert here,” you spat, arms folded.

haechan looked you up and down in a way that made your skin crawl and your blood boil. “between the two of us? that’s not even a question.” you were starting to get pissed.

you scowled, saying, “you really think you’re the shit, don’t you?”

“no,” he admitted with a cocky grin, “i know i am.” it was taking everything within you not to strangle him at this point.

“you know what’s funny about you? no matter what you do, you always end up thinking you’re the best.”

“are you saying i’m not?”

            “you’re a lot of things, donghyuck, but you’re sure as hell not perfect.”

“what am i then?”

            maybe you weren’t thinking very clearly anymore.

“well the first word that comes to mind is stupid, but clueless and obnoxious work pretty well too. try-hard’s a little informal but it fits the bill, and- oh, duh! you’re replaceable.”

you’d never seen haechan look more serious than when that word came out of your mouth. the shift in mood was immediate. “excuse me?”

            you raised an eyebrow, a little shocked that he didn’t have more to say. “you heard me.”

haechan’s voice was calm, but something about it seemed deadly. the onlookers watched with bated breath as they anticipated haechan’s response. “no, please, elaborate. i want to hear more. how am i replaceable?”

there was a pit forming in your stomach but you didn’t stop. “there’s nothing special about you. you’re not unique, you’re not remarkable, you’re not even bad enough to leave an impression. you’re completely average. and therefore, you’re replaceable.”

haechan barked out a dry laugh, hollow and numb and absolutely terrifying. suddenly he walked forward, brushing past as he muttered, "that's rich, coming from you." his friends rushed after him, the youngest ones looking at you with wide eyes before darting after them. you shrugged, trying to bury the panic growing within you. how did you get here? if anyone had looked closely, they’d see that your hands wouldn't stop shaking.

you went about the rest of your day, pushing your latest episode with haechan to the corner of your mind. you went over the notes you got earlier, practiced for a few hours and headed back to your dorm early, something you rarely allowed yourself. you cleaned your room, ate a sparse dinner, and studied for your exams, but even though you were highly productive something still felt wrong. you did everything you knew to do, but you couldn’t shake the restless feeling in your stomach. did it have something to do with you and haechan today? absolutely. but what good was dwelling on it? then you’d have to address the complex and slightly concerning nature of your relationship. and we don’t want to do that.

it’s well past midnight and you’ve accepted that sleep is out of the question. you decide to start your day early, maybe get a jump on your next assessment. so that’s why you walk out of your dorm at quarter to three in the morning, fully dressed and prepared to dance like your life depended on it. you wander down the corridors of practice rooms, but just as you find an empty one (you clearly weren’t the only one who couldn’t sleep tonight,) you hear a familiar voice. is that,,,donghyuck? your rational brain would’ve said to mind your own business. unfortunately, your rational brain was probably the only part of you asleep right now.

you walked into haechan’s practice room, waiting for him to notice you. from what you could tell he’d been singing (which begs the question, why is he in the dance hall?) and taking notes. he was hunched over on the floor, legs crossed and scribbling away on a notebook page. you cleared your throat and he sat up, annoyed by the interruption and now you. “late night, hyuckie?” you ask, feigning concern.

“leave me alone,” haechan muttered, returning to his work.

you stepped further into the room. “you sure? you don’t look too good.” and as much as you were mocking him it was true. his hair was a mess and under the light his cheeks seemed hollow, his skin mottled.

“i said,” haechan asserted, a growl in his voice, “leave me alone.”

“jeez, touchy much?” you quipped. your tone was playful and there was a gleam in your eye, one that said to haechan that he was nothing more than a toy. he didn’t feel like playing.

haechan stood up and walked towards you, so that you were standing maybe 3 feet away from each other. his voice was quiet, and you finally realized that maybe this wasn’t a good idea. “do you not know when to stop, y/n? get out. now.”

you don’t know why you kept going. everything in your body was screaming at you to go, to leave, to shut your damn mouth for once in your life. maybe you were tired. maybe you wanted to see how far you could push him. maybe you’re an idiot. whatever it was, there was no excuse for what you said next. and once you said it, you couldn’t take it back.

“make me.”

and all hell broke loose.

“what the hell is wrong with you?!” haechan shouted, voice breaking. “what did i do to deserve this? is this some sort of game to you? you win, y/n! you broke me!” you stood there, frozen. you watched your worst enemy shatter in front of you, watched as tears fell down his face. one by one they came as you stood in shock, until they poured like rain. did you do this? choked-back sobs fell from haechan’s lips, chest heaving with the weight of them. was this really happening? “you broke me,” he whispered. you could’ve sworn you heard him shaking. “just leave me alone. please.” you stayed paralyzed only a few moments longer, then turned around and walked out the door, down the hallway and back to your bed. it was safe to say your early start was over.

if sleep wasn't out of the question before it certainly was now. all the thoughts you'd been avoiding flew to the forefront of your mind and you could practically see them swirling in front of your eyes. obviously haechan was upset, and it was because of you. but how? you didn't think you'd said anything out of the ordinary; the two of you were always coming at each other. your conversations ran on repeat in your mind as the discomfort you'd suppressed all day rose to the surface. haechan insulted you first, so you were good right? and yeah, maybe you’d been a little harsh, but he deserved it, or at least that’s what you tried to tell yourself. but something else was nagging at you too. why did you care? haechan was a nuisance; you hated his guts. he was always treating you trash. so why did his tears prompt those of your own? you didn’t care about haechan, not in the least. you couldn’t. you were enemies, and that was how it was supposed to be.

the next day was odd to say the least. you couldn’t help but look at haechan just a little bit differently, and you figured he knew, because he seemed like he was trying to compensate for your behavior with his own. if he was petty before, he was downright cruel now, but for some reason you didn’t have it in you to come at him. every time he scowled at you all you saw were the tears streaming down his face, the whispers that’d fallen past his lips and lodged themselves in your conscience. when haechan took your food you’d simply get something else, when he brushed past you with a little too much force you stepped to the side and kept going. you were sure people picked up on it, but as usual you took little notice. even haechan’s friends had noticed the difference and though you rarely spoke to them, you noticed their lingering glances whenever you encountered each other. you could’ve figured that they too were wondering what had changed between the two of you (something they’d tried to pull out of haechan before) but the chances of them figuring it out were slim to none. secrecy was yet another of you and haechan’s shared qualities.

but there’s only so long you can go without falling back into old habits. after all, donghyuck still is your greatest enemy. you’re walking down the hallway and you turn a corner to see none other but haechan and his crew heading your direction. their excited chatter grinds to a halt as haechan turns to sneer at you, expecting a quip or a snarky face in return. the only thing you give him is a look of poorly disguised pity, and that’s what does it. haechan’s scowl deepens as he grabs you wrist and pulls you back the way you came, around the corner and away from his friends. “what the- get off me!” you hiss, yanking your arm away from him. “what’s wrong with you???”

haechan completely ignores you. “you need to stop,” he snaps, and the fire in his eyes ignites your own.

“the hell d’you mean ‘stop’?” you snap back, angered and a little bit confused. was this because of that night? you were being nice to him. was it just because you felt guilty for making him have a breakdown? sure. but it was still something. he could be a little grateful at least.

“whatever this is,” haechan gestured between the two of you violently, “needs to go back to the way it was” he was far too close to you and you took a step back, a scowl settling over your features and matching with his. you don’t- you can’t- think about what he means by that. but you can be angry.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t know i was taking orders from you,” you spat. “but next time i’ll be sure to. God forbid i’m actually kind to someone for once.”

hyuck took a step towards you, and now you were even closer than before. “i don’t want your pity. i want you to stop. understand?” you hate how intimidated you feel right now.

you looked haechan in the eye with a face of pure contempt before stepping around him and walking down the hall, making brief eye contact with his posse and quickly making your way past them. unbeknownst to you, hyuck deflates as he leans against the wall, eyes closed and breathing out a sigh of relief, that is until you pass and his friends rush to his side.

“yah, what was that?” a pastel-haired boy said, eyes wide with an incredulous grin. all of a sudden haechan noticed the floor was real interesting.

“it was nothing,” he replied, trying to remain nonchalant. “i just had to say something.”

another one nodded, his eye smile betraying his mock seriousness. “you just had to tell y/n something?” the boy raised an eyebrow, his implication crystal clear. the two youngest friends looked at each other, surprised that jeno had said what they’d both been thinking.

haechan scoffed but still refused to make eye contact. “shut up. you know that’s not what i meant.”

the last one chimed in. “what do you mean then? that you don’t have any feelings for them? at all?” renjun looked doubtful, which only frustrated hyuck even more.

“no, i don’t,” he asserted, “do i look like i like them?”

from the way the rest of his friends looked at him, the answer was probably yes.

“all i’m saying,” jaemin insisted, “is that you can’t hate someone that much without caring about them, at least a little bit.” the others nodded in agreement.

haechan finally looked up, and jaemin took a step back, hands in the air. “i hate y/n. i wouldn’t go out with them if they were the last person on earth. they mean nothing to me. okay?” with that he began to walk to their intended destination, and the boys went to follow him. the others made eye-contact, a look that said they didn’t totally buy it but it wasn’t worth fighting now. they’ve got better things to do than play matchmaker.

so now things are back to how they used to be, and you’re okay with that. in fact, you’re glad about it. your last encounter with haechan renewed your distaste for him, and now more than ever you felt justified in your hatred. he had some nerve to come at you like that when you were trying to be nice to him. thinking about it made your face heat up and your fists clench and somewhere deep down maybe it hurt your heart a little more than you’d like to admit, but there’s no reason to address that. now you didn’t have to worry about that night anymore, or how it made you feel. all that mattered was making haechan feel worse.

monthly evaluations roll around once again and maybe you weren’t on your a-game. maybe you got settled a little. maybe you were spending more time in your head than the studio, and maybe it showed. you tried, you really did, but when you got in front of those coaches you knew it wasn’t gonna be a good day. the actual performance was foggy, but what came after was clear as day. the coaches ripped into you, critiquing your technique, style, even your appearance all in front of the other trainees.

“did you even practice at all?”

“i expected more from you,”

“is this the l/n y/n i’ve been hearing about, or should i be looking for someone else?”

“fixing your face is easy, but when everything needs work? do you think you’ll ever debut like this?”

“you’re a disappointment to this company,”

every word felt like a jab to your stomach, but if you had anything it was a high pain tolerance. you did your best to disguise your hurt, and most of the people in the room didn’t notice. you bowed and apologized after the cutting remarks ended, and walked back to your favorite spot on the wall. you blinked rapidly, refusing to tear up, or at least not in public. you knew how to regulate, deep breaths and muscle control, and everyone brushed it off as you relaxing from your performance. 

that is, everyone except haechan.

as much as he hated to admit it, haechan knew you. when you were happy he knew wrinkles on your nose, when you were angry he knew the flush on your cheeks. when you were triumphant he knew the look in your eyes and when you were hurt? he knew that one best of all. haechan wouldn’t call himself a sadist, but he’d be lying if he never got a sort of sick satisfaction every time he got under your skin. that’s what enemies are for, right? but this, this was different. at first he watched with a cocky grin, excited to have something to rib you about later, but when the comments kept coming it started being a lot less funny. when your face began to harden his face fell because he knew how much you were hurting. and even worse, he wanted to make it go away. every word hit him as they did you, and that’s when he realized.

holy shit. i caught feelings.

of course haechan’s performance went off without a hitch, which was somehow worse to him than doing as poorly as you did. he barely registered the comments he received and he had to pin his eyes to the wall in order to keep them from darting over to you. he pushed through the motions until his time in the spotlight was over, and when he returned to his spot in line he too was tense, struggling not to let his concern show. while you and haechan were both passionate people, one of you was far better at hiding it. it clearly wasn’t lee donghyuck. 

you were out the door almost immediately after you were dismissed, and haechan almost went after you. but before he even had the chance to move he remembered the last thing he said to you, the way he made it clear how much he hated you, and he froze. everything in him wanted to chase you down, ask if you were okay, say he was an idiot and he was sorry for every time he tried to make your life hell because he never knew how much you mattered until you meant everything to him. but he couldn’t. he told himself there were a million reasons but in reality there was only one: he was scared, terrified of upsetting whatever the two of you had. so he spent the rest of his day avoiding you. it wasn’t hugely noticeable but to him it was glaringly obvious. were you that ingrained in his life? or was it that you were just always on his mind? apparently jaemin was right. you can’t hate someone without loving them, at least a little bit.

haechan wasn’t usually an early riser, but for some reason (read: you), he couldn’t get a good night’s sleep. so at four a.m. he found himself wandering the halls of sm entertainment. he'd figured the building would be empty, and for the most part he was right; only one room was taken. his growing curiosity led him to the door, but the sight before him replaced it with dread. it was you. and you looked bad.

the irony wasn't lost on him as he opened the door, and the memory of his night in the studio only filled him with concern. he didn't want to break you the way you broke him, but at this point he couldn't even be sure if you already had. you were dancing, or at least trying to, running your monthly performance over and over again. you would stumble practically every other move and you looked absolutely exhausted. you'd stop for a moment, leaning against a wall with your eyes closed and chest heaving, then force yourself up and start all over again. it was a sickening cycle of abuse, and it didn’t look like you’d stop it if you could.

he didn’t mean to startle you. you were so out of it you didn’t even notice haechan until he was looking you in the eye. you tried to turn away from him but your balance betrayed you, landing you on the floor. a rough growl of frustration what all you could muster as you tried to get donghyuck away from you. it wasn’t clear whether he didn’t hear you, or chose not to listen.

haechan slowly suck to your level, crouched on his knees. “y/n, y/n are you alright? can you hear me?” he asked quietly.

“of course i can hear you,” you slurred, “now leave me alone.”

“i can’t do that,” he replied, “you can’t even stand by yourself. you need to rest.”

you scoffed, but even that seemed weak. “why should i listen to you? you’re tricking me, hyuck. you want me to fail.”

it hurt because you were right. up until today, that was something haechan would have thought. he would have pounced at the chance to set you up for failure. how could he prove to you that he didn’t feel that way anymore? “please y/n. you’re not thinking straight-”

“stop!” you cried, voice trembling. “i-i need to keep working. i’m not good enough. not yet,” your breathing sped up, your body seized with each gasp. “they-they said i wasn’t good enough-i have to be good enough,”

haechan knew that feeling. he’d felt it a million times. the one that sat in the pit of your stomach, the one that chanted over and over again every harsh word said against you. after all,  you were the one who’d given it to him that night. he could have laughed at the irony if he wasn’t so close to tears. hyuck clutched your shoulders, voice shaking with urgency as he said “y/n, i need you to listen to me. you’re not okay. we need to leave. we can come back after you’ve slept,” (he had no such intentions.) “okay? just come with me for now. can you do that for me?” he attempted to pull you to your feet. key word: attempted.

you writhed your way out of his arms, landing violently and curling into yourself on impact. “no!” you shouted. you began rocking back and forth on the ground, muttering to yourself over and over again, “i have to be good enough, i have to be good enough, i have to be good enough,” your chest heaved with broken sobs, a sound almost as heart wrenching as the sight. if haechan’s heart was already broken, the damage was irreparable now. hyuck dropped to his knees in front of you, tears welling up in his own eyes and threatening to spill. you were beyond reason. panicking, he did the only thing he could think to do. he held you.

he pulled your shaking form towards him, flinching at the cold of your skin. rocking with you he clutched you tighter, as if by surrounding your body with his he could shield you from all the horrors in the world. he took deep breaths and tried to steady you, a slow process that only proved effective after several minutes. you felt him gather you into his arms, felt every one of his inhales and exhales, and though you weren’t in a place to speak- to think clearly, really- a thought pushed past the fog in your mind and out through your lips.

“i thought you wanted to go back to the way it was,” you whispered.

“i did,” he whispered back.

and neither of you knew what to say.

if you thought things changed after hyuck’s episode, you had no idea what was coming after yours. it started with conversations, cautious approaches on haechan’s part to get you to crack a smile. then it was surprises. he’d come up to you with food you liked or something that “just reminded him of you.” he started sitting with you during meals, ditching his usual friends for your company instead. he said hi in the hallway, he popped in when he knew you were practicing, he told jokes and played nice and did all the kinds of things that friends do. and as odd as that was, it wasn’t the oddest of it all. the weirdest thing was that you didn’t stop him.

you wanted to, God did you want to, but for some reason you just never told him. part of you appreciated it, craved it really, it wasn’t often you got this much attention. a smaller part of you wanted it more because it was donghyuck who gave it to you, because even when you fought with him you always had something. an even smaller part tried to hide what you really felt, and the smallest part said maybe, just maybe, you didn’t want hyuck to be your enemy anymore. but all of that was drowned out by the discomfort that consumed you every time he got close to you. it wasn’t the actions, though that did feel...odd, it was more like...it was more like you didn’t know what it meant. well, you did, but you weren’t ready for that yet. this isn’t how you two were. it was different. you didn’t like different.

and on top of that there was the attention. haechan figured it was bound to happen. the two of you clearly had a dynamic relationship and among trainees you both were some of the best; there’s no wonder word had gotten around. hyuck continued to deny his feelings for you but by now his friends had figured out at least part of the story, and they teased him almost constantly for it. no one asked you about it, the main reason being that they’re kinda sorta maybe definitely terrified of you, and that was probably the only reason you made it as long as you did. but still, you didn’t try to stop him. or at least you never planned to.

you were eating lunch one day, almost relaxed in the solace you so much cherished; in between classes and practices you hardly had time to think anymore. per usual you refused to think of one thing, (we all know what it is at this point) which would have been fine if that thing wasn't heading this way. you didn't look at haechan coming even though you knew he was; you were tired and glowingly stressed by his actions. plus, you figured, it wasn't like you could stop him. he made his way over and hopped on top of your table, grinning. hyuck ruffled your hair, chuckled and asked, "you miss me?" you ducked downwards, not really up to dealing with haechan's antics, and tried to continue to eat. he huffed (and pouted if you had to guess,) as he continued the conversation with himself, saying, "I guess not," he slipped off the table and sat next to you, still painfully cheerful, and continued to talk to himself, filling your once comfortable silence with somewhat unnerving chatter. you zoned out and apparently your discomfort became more and more obvious because it wasn't long before donghyuck asked you, "hey y/n, are you listening?"

you didn't know why you were getting so upset, and you didn't like it either. you weren't sure if you could do this anymore. you shook your head, trying to stay calm, and haechan leaned towards you, clearly concerned. "are you okay?"

"why are you doing this?" you asked him, your voice shaking just a little bit. you hadn't looked up yet, but your food also seemed last appetizing by the second.

"what do you mean?" he replied, oblivious.

"why are you doing this?" you repeat, gesturing between you two. "is this some kind of joke? or a dare?" internally you begged for his answer to be yes. at least then you wouldn't have to deal with what you knew it was.

hyuck's face scrunched up in confusion, before sinking into realization. "what? no! am i not allowed to care about you?"

you raised your head, finally making eye contact. frustration bubbled up inside you. why did he have to make this so difficult? "no, haechan, you're not."

"y/n, are you alright?" his voice was infuriatingly kind. it almost made you feel bad, well actually it did, but you were too upset for that to stop you.

"why does it matter?" your anger mounted with every word. “we’re not friends. we don’t get along, we never have.” you were getting tense. this was escalating. haechan was getting nervous.

“i know, and i’m sorry, but i’m trying to change that-” haechan’s voice was rising, even though he didn’t mean it to. you could hear- feel even- the sincerity in his voice.

your voice was rising too. you knew people would hear you. you could sense the whispers about to come. you couldn’t stop now. “why, haechan? so you can feel better about yourself? you think this can erase everything else?” you were angry, so angry, so desperate for  his pain. but this wasn’t like before. this wasn’t petty. this was terrifying. and maybe if you were scary enough, mean enough, strong enough, you could make it go away.

he tried to get a word out, but you wouldn’t let him. you were yelling now, saying, “this doesn’t work! whatever this is, whatever we wish this was, could never happen!”

he backed away, standing up as he tried to reply, “why can’t we? y/n, i lik-”

“we can’t do this!” you shouted, “look around, donghyuck! don’t you see where we are? who we are? we’re trainees, and even if we weren’t this wouldn’t work!”

“y/n, listen to me! you know how i feel about you!” haechan yelled, finally cutting you off and catching you off guard. his tone lowered, and you could see the emotion welling up inside him. “and i’d like to think that you care about me at least half as much as i care about you.”

you couldn’t say he was wrong.

“i get that it’s scary, i get that it doesn’t make a lot of sense, but i want this. i want you. isn’t it worth trying? even if it hurts?” there were tears in his eyes. there were tears in yours.

you were quiet now, barely above a whisper. “we can’t do this haechan. i can’t do this.”

and neither of you knew what to say.

so now you and haechan don’t talk. you don’t make eye contact in the hallways, you don’t stand next to each other during evaluations. you don’t take each other’s favorite food or click your tongues or make cruel jokes. you don’t even think about each other. or at least you try not to.

people don’t talk about you either. they used to; right after it happened everyone had something to say. they all had questions, comments, concerns, but they also had the decency not to ask while both of you had tears streaming down your face. you never explained what happened. haechan never did either, not even to his friends, the ones he eventually debuted with. 

secrecy was one of your many shared qualities.

but it's not like you died or anything. you went on with life, went on with the trainee grind until you left, switching companies to make your debut in a smaller company years after you’ve seen donghyuck’s face plastered on every tv screen.

and part of you wondered, what if you’d tried? what if you waited, what if you didn’t fight him that day and let things go until haechan either got over you or confessed to you himself? would you still be together? would it have worked? would it have hurt as much as that last fight? would you have gone back to the way it used to be? you tried not to ask those questions, after all you made the right choice. you got your dream. to get that and have haechan? that would be too much.

[flowerspecial]

Enemy To Lover - High School Edition- Part 1

JB

So JB would be one of those people who everyone thinks is quite cool, but also a little bit scary. JB just has this very strong silent hero vibe about him. Everyone would either want to be him, or date him. He wouldn't say much in lessons, or in general, but he was never short of attention. You on the other hand, would be the opposite. For every introvert quality that JB possessed, you had the equal and opposite extrovert quality. You two were the same level of friendship and popularity, you just kinda got to where you are quite differently. At first JB could not stand your loud and boisterous personality, he didn't understand why you felt the need to shout about everything. You couldn't understand why JB had to be so moody all the time, like Jesus Christ lighten up a little bit. Therefore, when you two were in the same room, which sadly for you two was very often, because your friendship grouped often joined together, you couldn't stand it. It's not so much that you two would be mean to each other directly, it's more that you two would just avoid each other completely. You would stand at opposite sides of the room, and you would only talk to each other if it was absolutely necessary.  Maybe you two would be a little bit passive aggressive towards each other. If you were being particularly loud, you would notice that JB would roll his eyes. “Be careful, if you roll your eyes like that they might fall out of your head.” You would sneer at him. And when he is seemingly not joining in with the conversation, you would not so quietly mutter under your breath, “why come along if you aren't going to talk to anyone?” “Just because you need to shout everything to understand your own thoughts, doesn't mean that we all do.”

Mark

So Mark was always the loner kid, he just generally preferred to hang on his own than in any sort of group. But because of this, he had this delinquency aura hanging over him. Every teacher dreaded having him in their class, in fear that he is somehow going to be disruptive. No student wanted to sit with him either, his reputation precedes him too much. Sadly, that includes yourself. You were a hardworking student, always wanting to get everything done on time, not wanting to rock the boat at all. So students like Mark, who had little care for other people’s education, really annoyed you. If they didn't want to be in the class that's fine, they should just leave. But don't sit at the back and disrupt everyone else just because you are bored, that isn't fair on anyone. Just to make matters worse, because he had this bad boy reputation going on, it also made him appear very attractive to most of the female population in school, and some of the male population. Thanks to that, in every lesson you shared, there was always some random girl sitting next to Mark, trying to work her way in there. So all you could hear for the entire lesson was their shameless flirting. Eventually, a teacher grew bored of this and decided to reassign seating, and unfortunately Mark was going to be sat next to you. “Are you serious? I don't want to sit next to Mark. Give me anyone else.” “Well I don't want to sit next to you either.” Mark would retaliate. “This is the new seating plan, and this is final, now sit down.” You and Mark would begrudgingly sit down next to each other. What infuriated you further was now you were sitting nearer to the back, which obviously was not the best place if you actually wanted to get any learning done. “Well this is going to be a fantastic year.” You would say sarcastically.

Jackson

Let me tell you something, the relationship between you and Jackson was turbulent to say the least. Jackson was easily the most well known and the most like boy around school. He was also the star player in whatever sports team your school was famous for. This boy literally ruled the school, well almost ruled the school. You, on the other hand, were head cheerleader. You also were very well known and very popular around school. Everyone told you that you and Jackson should get together, you would make one hell of a power couple. But in real life, you two hated each other. You both hated the idea of having competition for the school’s affection, everyone’s eyes should be on you not him. Jackson would always tease you about being a cheerleader, because you have to go to all of his games and stand on the sidelines. “How does it feel knowing that people aren't actually here to support you? That you are just a little filler, some light entertainment before the real talent comes on the stage.” “How does it feel knowing that we have won more competitions than your team could ever imagine? At least my team is on top of it's game, whereas yours… well… at least you are trying.” Honestly you could cut the tension between you two with a knife, and it had no signs of letting up. Well, that was until prom season came around. Your brilliant cheerleader friends had the idea of setting everyone up with a member of Jackson’s team, and it was only natural that they decided to put you and Jackson together. “Why the hell am I going with him? We have this mutual feeling of hate for each other!” “Because you two look amazing together and seriously, all this tension is just pent up sexual frustration. So you two are going together, end of.”

Jinyoung

You had high ambitions at school, basically you just wanted to get the best grades possible so you could leave this town and never look back. It's not that you hated your home or anything, you just knew that there was more to this world than what was inside of the school grounds. You worked relentlessly in order to get the best grades and the best application colleges have ever seen. You were determined to get top of your class in everything, and any extra curricular activity you did, you were equally determined to succeed in that also. However, there was one small snag that was stopping you from achieving your ambitions, and that little snag was called Jinyoung. You and Jinyoung had been in the same school and the same class since you started school, and both of you were determined to be the best. It was just a constant ongoing competition between you two, and it was apparent to everyone. Your peers would always joke that there was absolutely no point even attempting to get first or second in class, because those two ranks were permanently reserved for you and Jinyoung. But the order of the ranks, well, that came down to the day. Every test you did, both of you were eager to find out the other’s score. Whoever managed to come out on top would always make a comment, you two had been fighting too long for the top position to not gloat when you achieved it. Because Jinyoung was your main competition, you resented him fiercely. You didn't have anything against him personally, but you hated that there was someone always in the way of you achieving your goal. Every night, you would revise for hours, wondering if Jinyoung is doing the same. As the time came for university applications, well, that was when the worst of both of you came out.

Youngjae

You never understood those people who genuinely liked school, like seriously what was fun about it? For you, it was just a place of fake people, backstabbers, and people who create drama for fun. You had never been one for having a lot of friends, but that was always your choice. Why be friends with people who are going to leave you the second you are no longer of use to them? Who needs that kind of stress? You had made this decision quite early on in your school career, so you were pretty well known for having no friends. Sadly, this only made matters worse for you. Because you had no friends, people had a habit of spreading absolute rubbish about you. You had more myths surrounding you than bigfoot. It was fair to say that school life for you was not easy, and you resented anyone who walked around campus with a smile on their face. There was one person in particular that particularly got on your nerves, Youngjae. Every time you saw him, he had this smile plastered onto his face. He was always around his face, laughing and telling jokes. You aren't stupid, you knew that you resented him out of jealousy, but he still annoyed you. Unfortunately, you shared a lot of classes, so there wasn't really a chance to be able to ignore him. You always tried to sit at opposite sides of the classroom, and always in front of him. That way you couldn't be tempted to turn around and see that annoyingly adorable smile of his. “So class, today we will start our partner presentations, and yes, I have assigned the partners.” The whole class groaned, awaiting to see if their presentation was about to be a complete disaster or heaven on earth. Obviously as luck would have it, you ended up with Youngjae. Fantastic… that was just what you needed.

Bambam

They always say that the first lottery you ever play in is your birth, some people are born into high society, and some people are born on the bread line. Thankfully you never had to experience true suffering, you and your family always worked hard to make sure there was food on the table. Of course it was hard that you had to try and juggle school and working part time jobs. Of course it was hard that you always had to buy school uniforms second hand, and if they ever needed repairs you would have to sew it yourself and hope for the best. Of course it was hard that you could never afford to go on any school trips, so you felt like your school life was lacking in some way. What made matters worse was that you attended a very elite school, full of trust fund kids who have never had to lift a finger for anything. You were the school’s token scholarship kid, your intelligence saw you a fully paid scholarship and your parents practically forced you to go. Not all of your classmates are as bad as each other, there were a few nice ones. But there was one group in particular that really got your blood boiling. Think of them as the group from Gossip Girl, but ten times more rich and ten times worse. At the top of the hierarchy, was Bambam. Bambam was the richest boy in the school, and god did he make sure everyone knew it. He also pushed the limits with how much he could customise his uniform, just to show off whatever designer he has just bought. And seriously, who brings caviar for lunch? You tried to stay away from Bambam as much as possible, he wasn't someone that you wanted to get on the wrong side of. You were happy being invisible, you were happy with absolutely no one knowing your name. Well, life has a cruel sense of irony, doesn't it?

Yugyeom

School really wasn't how the movies portrayed it, in good ways and bad. One of the main ways that school was not like how it is in the movies was that you were not constantly surrounded by a group of amazing friends. In actual fact, you were somewhat of a loner. It was not that you tried to be a loner, you didn't intend on avoiding people. You just could never seem to make friends that would stick around. Eventually you just stopped trying to make friends, and learned how to be happy on your own. It wasn't the best of school lives. You had always dreamed of having a big social circle, going to parties, having sleepovers etc. But it seemed like this just was not in the cards for you. The good thing though was you were never really picked on for being a loner, people just tended to leave you alone all together. Except for this one group of boys, and bloody hell were they mean to you. You never really understood exactly what it was that you did to upset them, but they seemed determined to get their revenge. At the top of this little group, was Yugyeom. A boy who seemed so nice to everyone else, god he had more friends than you have had hot dinners. But to you, he was the devil. If you had to walk past him, he would either knock whatever it was that you was carrying, or trip you up so he could watch you fall flat on your face. The torment became so much that you would try to avoid Yugyeom at all costs. If that meant walking the long way round to your lesson and being late, then so be it. You liked to seek refuge in the music department, getting lost in the music was always like a form of therapy to you. One day, you spent a couple of your free periods in the large room, playing the piano. Once you had finished your piece, you heard a round of applause coming from the door.

💕Does anyone want the second part to this? 💕

[aelinbitch-archive]

unpopular opinion: i don’t like rowan/rowaelin. i’m not here to convince u to unstan lol ppl are allowed to like/dislike things w/o feeling bad about it omg but i hate that some rowan stans are so insensitive when it comes to those who don’t like him! they’re so thirsty for him that they condemn anyone who doesn’t stan him & then excuse his problematic/lowkey triggering actions bc he’s hot and it’s gross. AGAIN not saying ppl can’t like rowan it’s ok lol but it’s more about some stan’s behavior

That’s totally fair my angel. I dislike the vibe that some people are locked out of the fandom for not being a cheerleader for every aspect of the series, and I hope that my followers/mutuals know that if they dislike stuff I like, or like stuff I dislike, expressing their opinions regarding that won’t ever cause me to cut them off (unless it’s like, some truly gross shit, which disliking rowaelin isn’t). 

Also I have to say, even tho I do like rowaelin, I understand where you’re coming from about people excusing his actions because he’s hot. I’ve toooooootally seen that. And I’ll just be 100% honest - no shade to anyone, but some of the rowaelin content on this website disturbs me a little bit, in terms what’s considered hot/romantic/acceptable when writing or depicting them in art. I’ve seen some weird stuff defended as hot or even just “not that bad.” Which isn’t necessarily a problem with canon, but your ask was more about stans anyway, so yeah. 

A while ago I actually wrote rowaelin meta in response to some other peeps (which was more about Aelin in relation to Rowaelin and how she’s included or not included in discussions of the ship, but it has some thoughts relevant to this ask) so I’m gonna just copy and paste what I wrote below and feel free to read if u want. (It’s like very overdramatic and fiery lmao but anyway). 

I agree with a lot of this, but (at risk of derailing ms aelinapologist’s amazing post) I do have a few things to say, which are

1. OP took two whole paragraphs at the beginning of her post to say that the point wasn’t to discourse about rowaelin being abuse or not abuse, it was to talk about how the conversations centering around said abuse consistently display a disturbing lack of empathy for the character who should be the main concern of the debate. So I just find it a bit funny/odd that the replies (including a portion of the one I’m about to make, I admit that) have been like “Yeah great post! And now to discourse about Rowaelin-” but I digress.

2. I have consistently loved reading about Rowan and Aelin and they’re one of my favorite fictional couples. So nothing I’m about to say is intended to be like “GOTCHA they suck and you suck for liking them!!!” Because I like them as well. A lot. And in addition, nothing about this reblog is intended to be shady or confrontational in any way shape or form. I just think this is a great and very needed discussion I’d like to contribute to, so here goes.

3. Even if we look at HoF alone and ignore how things play out later: yes, they are both mean to one another, yes, they are both in a dark place and end up having a mutually positive effect on one another (so I definitely agree that, at least for HoF alone, it’s not a “douchey guy changes for the heroine story”) but. There IS still a power imbalance. I don’t think it’s entirely accurate to say “they were both bad The End” without also bringing up the fact that Rowan is 300 years old and Aelin is 18, and that Rowan is training Aelin and is in a position that gives him a massive amount of control over her, and that he is stronger and more powerful than her physically, magically, and socially (he is a prince and legendary warrior, she is a AWOL teenage princess currently working as a scullery maid).

Maybe I’m reading into it too much, but I really just don’t think that Aelin, a 17 y/o girl going through an unimaginably shitty time, being like “fuck you!!” to this 300 y/o jerk who doesn’t know shit about her is on the same level as aforementioned 300 y/o jerk hitting her, biting her, and telling her she would have been of more use to the world if she’d died when she was eight.

And in addition to that, we see that his behavior effects her a lot more than it effects him. When he verbally tears her down, we see her experience genuine and devastating despair and shame, whereas everything she does and says to him, no matter how snarky or outright cruel, is not having that same effect on him. People always seem to think they’re giving Aelin credit for being a Strong Woman™ by saying “she’s tough! she can handle it!” when in reality… we have evidence for the fact that she kinda can’t handle it. That the way he treats her in the beginning is slowly wearing her down and sending her deeper into a depressive state. And I don’t understand how it somehow reflects poorly on Aelin (or is even misogynist) to acknowledge this. Women, especially literal teenage girls, should not be measured by their tolerance for mistreatment.

All I really wish is that somewhere along the line we’d gotten a genuine apology from Rowan for this besides a throwaway line in KoA about regretting their “brawling.” And again, none of this is to say “see!! it IS abuse!!” it’s just to suggest that, even as an enemies to friends to lovers story, the “enemies” part was not exactly on a level playing field.

4. But with that being said, I could probably forgive the imbalance in their early relationship, mostly because their later relationship, as both friends and lovers, is so amazing and supportive in pretty much every way. And the great thing about enemies to FRIENDS to lovers, like you said, is that 1) none of the assholery occurred during any kind of romantic or sexual relationship or a transition into one, so it was sort of “fair and square” in that way, and 2) they had the opportunity form a solid, platonic foundation of trust and caring before they crossed into the lover territory.

Aaaaaaaaaand then Sarah did a retcon job on HoF which negated… pretty much all of that. I can totally be down with “good old fashioned mutual hatred thaws into caring which grows into love” but once we start hearing shit like “‘Sometimes, you’d be sleeping beside me at Mistward, and it’d take all my concentration not to lean over and bite them. Bite you all over’” and “‘That was the first time I really lost control around you, you know. I wanted to chuck you off a cliff, yet I bit you before I knew what I was doing. I think my body knew, my magic knew. And you tasted… So good. I hated you for it’”……. hhhhhhhhhhh.

I can’t think of many arguments for this NOT contributing at least a little to the “he’s mean because he loves you (and stick it out because someday he’ll figure it out)” trope. And while it might be a bit different because Aelin was quite mean as well, her behavior was just… meanness. Not some sort of weird outlet for repressed sexual attraction/love. I guess I just get flashbacks of “No sweetie, that boy in your class kicks your desk, pulls your hair, and calls you names because he likes you and doesn’t know how to express it.”

And I think this decision on Sarah’s part to go back and say he was into her all along is 1) a result of the mating bond thing she’s so fond of and 2) kind of a panicked backpedalling to the backlash she might have gotten over Rowan’s behavior in HoF? Which is…. so ironic because she made it SO much worse. In my humble opinion, she should have just doubled down on what she originally wrote as enemies-friends-lovers (and had Rowan bring up his early behavior and apologize in some way), and the problem would have been solved. And while I personally feel that I can recognize this for what it is - a shitty retcon - and enjoy the relationship despite it, I don’t think we should talk over people for whom this is a deal-breaker for the ship.

5. I don’t think about all of this and have the reaction that so many “anti tog” people seem to have of “FUCK Rowan he’s ABUSIVE and PREDATORY and I wish he was DEAD!!!” I think there are things to criticize about his behavior and about the way Sarah decided to spin their relationship, but they have had many great moments, especially in the later books, and I don’t think I or anyone else is “shipping abuse” by enjoying that. All of this is just to emphasize how, in OP’s very succinct words, “your inalienable right to enjoy two characters’ dynamic does not outweigh the right to criticise it.” Because there ARE valid things to criticize, and we as Rowaelin shippers (lol.) need to be careful not to conflate ugly hatred with valid criticism when we speak over it.

And because there IS so much ugly hatred for Aelin and her relationship with Rowan on this website, I completely understand why there’s a kind of knee-jerk reaction of jumping to defense of this ship we love. But that impulse, quite frankly, means nothing to me if defense of Rowaelin includes the erasure of Aelin’s canonical experiences. And maybe this is wacky and controversial, but I’m pretty sure we can express our enjoyment of Rowaelin AND keep Aelin as an individual from being swept under the rug.  

6. More than saying any of that what I really really want to do (and have been trying to do in the previous paragraphs, but maybe unsuccessfully) is bring the conversation back to OP’s original point which was not “abuse!” or “not abuse!” but about how the ways in which we discuss “abuse or not abuse” often includes a stomach-turning lack of concern for Aelin and some frustratingly reductive arguments. And somehow I have the sneaking suspicion that Rowaelin shippers are reading this post and missing the point, which that this is happening on BOTH sides of the argument.

Everyone is perfectly entitled to ship Rowaelin and argue their opinion about its merits or lack thereof, but when we cover our ears and say “she was mean too she was mean too she was mean too she was mean too la la la la la la la” that’s completely ignoring the genuine pain that she did experience in HoF and the power imbalance that she was subjected to, no matter whether or not we personally feel that it was sufficiently rectified in later books.

And I see this ALL THE TIME, in both the fandom and “anti-fandom”, and I’m honest to god quite sick of it. I’m sick of the willful ignorance of a teenage girl’s pain in order to further an agenda. Yes, it’s more stomach-turning when the agenda is to prove what an evil bitch she is or whatever, but it’s not excusable if your agenda is to prove Rowaelin is great, either! And I don’t understand why we have to throw all nuance out the window and ignore how Dorian hurt her, ignore how Chaol hurt her, ignore how Rowan hurt her, fucking hell, ignore how SAM hurt her, just so we can make our arguments! Because as much as the antis love to scream about “WHAT MESSAGE IS THIS TERRIBLE SHIP SENDING THE TINY GIRL-CHILDREN WHO READ THE BOOKS???” it’s also like, what kind of message is our ongoing discussion of it sending by sweeping a teenage girl’s experiences under the rug when we argue about her relationships?

And like OP said, what have we even got to show for it? No conclusion has been reached, nothing has been achieved besides valuing a romance (or the hatred of that romance and preference for a different romance) over individual characters, namely an individual character who happens to be a teenage girl that has suffered an ungoldy amount - suffered, sometimes, at the hands of male characters we like.

In conclusion, the mass allergy everyone seems to have to giving a shit about Aelin unless its to further their agenda is sickening. If I had a dollar for every time I’ve had to hear about how poor Manon’s character was “ruined” by Manorian (although not directly by DORIAN, of course, because apparently Saint Haviliard can do no wrong) I’d have enough money to buy a lamborghini and drive it off a cliff like I wish I could every time I hear someone’s terrible hot take about how Aelin is complicit in her own alleged abuse. Yet somehow I’ve never heard anyone complain about the damage done to Aelin’s character by any of the male characters, including Rowan. It’s never “Rowan ruined Aelin’s character!!” it’s “Rowaelin sucks and so does Aelin.” In fact, one of the REASONS Aelin sucks in the first place IS Rowan/Rowaelin! What a great implicit message to send to people reading your “critiques”: if you are annoying and #problematic enough, your suffering will be used against you and you will receive no sympathy for it. Cool!

And for other ships, too: it’s never “Chaol and Dorian, while at points a very good for Aelin, also caused her a lot of pain” it’s either “Chaol was right about Aelin in QoS and both he and Dorian are ruined because of her #chaorian” OR, from the fans, who, again, are not off the hook, “Chaol and Dorian and Aelin are BFFs forever #originaltrio.” And as a teenage girl myself, who loves and identifies with Aelin, who is more invested in her story than anyone else’s… I’m just tired. And more than a little appalled. And I wish we could do better.