#to know the right lyrics so we don’t sound stupid LOL only for luke to mess them up himself lmfaoooo

[ilostyou]

okay i’m finally listening to 5SOS5 (you’re right, it is SO good) and i had listened to me, myself, and i a ton when it was released as lead single BUT i guess i only listened to the clean version??!??!??! just got jumpscared a little

WEEEEE i wanna hear all the 5sos5 thoughts 🤲🏻 the clean version makes me giggle LOL but in hindsight i can see how that’s a little jumpscare shdkdkfjdkc

[jaskiers-sweetkiss]

Sunset Swerve - Part 10

Pairing: Luke x OC

Word Count: 5.3K

Warnings: some swearing, i actually think that’s it for this part?

A/N: Okay here’s part 10, or as I’ve been calling it: Part 9 2: Electric Boogaloo. This is a very special edition of Sunset Swerve in which you get to read from Luke’s POV! This is covering the same time frame as part 9 but Luke’s pov provides some different scenes and new insight that’s kinda significant so I would really recommend not skipping it lol. I wanna shoutout @meangirlsx for being my sounding board and giving me loads of help on these two parts! As always, send me a message/drop a comment if you want to be tagged and let me know what you think!

Part 9  Masterlist

___

The week started off great for Luke. He was coming off the high from their performance at the open mic time and the relief that Julie didn’t have to quit the band. The latter fact also absolved him from his guilt of having suggested that Julie sneak out in the first place.

He found himself spending a lot of time with Jordan in the following days between talking about the book he’d started (she had been right, Annabeth was really cool though he maintained that she was stuck-up) and writing music. Their relationship had become much more civil following his birthday, though the fighting didn’t stop. Luke was starting to wonder if Jordan could survive without regularly making snarky or sarcastic comments. Still, the newfound closeness had been… nice. Luke wasn’t entirely sure how to categorize it, especially alongside the feelings he was certain he had for Julie.

As he sat across from Jordan, close enough that their knees were touching as they worked through some rhythms on a new song, Luke found that he wasn’t certain of anything. Jordan felt like a magnet- he realized belatedly that she always had- constantly pulling him closer and closer no matter how much either of them tried to pull away. He was starting to wonder if learning metaphors at book club was really a good thing.

“Hey Luke, can I ask you about something?” Julie pipped up from the entryway of the garage, pulling him away from his thoughts and Jordan.

“Sure, what’s up?” He asked, quirking an eyebrow quizzically.

“Oh, um, actually can we talk outside?” She asked and he furrowed his brow but nodded, setting down his guitar and jogging over to where she stood by the doors.

“This is gonna sound weird but can I ask why Jordan was with you at your house the other day?” Julie asked unsurely once they were outside and Luke froze, not expecting the question.

“How’d you…?” He trailed off, peering at the girl suspiciously. He hadn’t told anyone that he made frequent visits to his house, though he suspected the guys knew and Jordan had figured it out on his birthday.

“Alex and Reggie took me…” Julie said, tucking her hair behind her ear embarrassedly. “After I called you selfish and said you didn’t care about anyone but yourself…”

“That’s ironic coming from you, Miss Boundaries,” he scoffed irritatedly, brows furrowed in anger and Julie sighed.

“I’m really sorry Luke, it was wrong.”

“But now you wanna snoop even more,” he frowned, raising his brows as if to say ‘seriously?’

Julie opened her mouth to defend herself but Luke cut her off with a sigh before answering her question.

“If you must know, Jordan and I have spent every birthday together since we were five, I guess she figured I could use the comfort and familiarity.” He shrugged, trying to downplay how much the gesture had meant to him. It’s been really difficult, grieving his loss of his parents while they grieved him even twenty-five years later. At least when he was a runaway there was still always the possibility of reconciliation. Now there never would be.

“That’s really thoughtful,” Julie said, “But it doesn’t make sense. You guys hate each other, what happened?”

“Oh, we always have,” he smirked to himself, remembering that first day they met. He’d found a massive spider in the yard and thought it would be funny to put it in her hair, obviously, she hadn’t felt the same and the rest was history. “But our parents really wanted us to be friends so… birthday parties.”

“That explains a lot, actually,” Julie nodded thoughtfully and now it was Luke’s turn to be confused, tilting his head in a silent request for the girl to explain. “You guys have these moments where you like, exude this closeness that totally doesn’t fit the nature of your relationship. It makes sense now, knowing how long you’ve known each other.”

“I mean, there was a point where we were basically the closest thing to family each other had,” Luke shrugged, thinking about those last five months in the studio. “Guess we forgot about that when we died.”

They’d grow inexplicably close in those months that they’d lived together. It was an unspoken closeness, neither of them dared to acknowledge it but Luke saw it often in the little things. They’d stopped calling each other names when it was just them in the garage and sometimes when he was stuck on a new song he was writing she’d shout out suggestions from across the room. It was like they’d called an unconscious truce in their grief but when they came back as ghosts that all disappeared, the two immediately back at each others’ throats.

When Luke returned to the studio after his conversation with Julie it had sort of felt like the same thing had happened again. He’d thought he was finally making headway with Jordan, that they’d finally started back on the path to friendship after his birthday, or maybe even something more, and while things hadn’t totally changed, they felt different somehow.

She’d stopped hanging out with him in her free time. Instead, she spent the time holed up in the corners of the studio with her notebook or sitting behind the piano or her guitar, playing or strumming as she hummed softly. Luke wanted to help her out or tell her she sounded beautiful but he couldn’t help but notice how secretive she was being. They’d been working on songs together recently but this one she seemed determined to keep to herself.

When he entered the studio one afternoon to find her notebook on the couch, completely unguarded he couldn’t help himself. He blamed his overwhelming curiosity for why he picked it up despite knowing first-hand how sacred a song journal was.

When he found the partially written song at the back of the notebook he sucked in a breath, chest filling with hope at the lyrics on the page. It wasn’t much, only one verse and a chorus and what looked like half a pre-chorus but he couldn’t help but wonder if it was about him.

[Verse ?]

Bored of games why do you still play?

Back and forth, it’s always the same

You’re player one, I’m player two, who is she, player who?

Roll the dice and make your way

Pre-chorus

I know I’m hard but that’s part of it

You could leave but you are still here

and I’ve nowhere to go but ???

His mind whirled as he tried to work it out for himself. It screamed jealousy to him. She’d started writing after he’d had his conversation with Julie, so it wasn’t an unreasonable guess that he was “you” and Julie was “she.” She was jealous of him and Julie. But was it platonic? Was it more than that?

He was pretty sure he’d lost his damn mind in the hurricane of questions racing through his brain. It was the only explanation for the pure stupidity of what he did next.

“Moss, what’s this?” He asked when she found him with her notebook. Then he started to read off the chorus,

“I’m selfish, I’m selfish, I’m selfish

when it comes to you.

I can’t help it, can’t help it

crazy things that I do.”

“Give it back,” she snapped, cheeks flushing in what he later recognized as a mix of embarrassment and anger but at the time his brain ignored entirely, too caught up in an unthought-out attempt to confront her feelings.

“When I need you I come back to you.

I’m selfish, I’m selfish

when it comes to you.”

“I’m serious, Patterson. You don’t see me poking around in your notebook,” Jordan argued, grabbing hold of the notebook but not pulling it out of his hands.

“You don’t see me leaving my notebook lying around.” His body and his mouth were moving on autopilot but without a GPS as he responded cheekily, letting go of the notebook. Somewhere in the back of his mind, his rational brain was screaming at him to shut up but he just kept talking. “Who’s it about?”

“None of your business.”

Though his brain was on a self-destructive warpath, he couldn’t help but notice how adorable Jordan looked hugging the notebook to her chest protectively. Though, the adorableness factor was negated slightly by the death glare in her eyes.

“I think it’s about me,” he announced smugly, leaning back against the couch haughtily as if daring her to contradict him.

What the hell are you doing, man?

“I think you’re a dumbass,” she spat, and just like that she was gone, poofing away.

He leaned forward, putting his head in his hands with a groan as he realized what he did.

For the next day and a half, he could feel how the atmosphere between them had grown frigid. He’d tried to apologize a few times but every time he got close she would poof away, clearly not wanting to hear from him. What interactions they did have in those couple days were short and snide, laced with venom and insults. The behavior didn’t seem out of the ordinary to the rest of the group, but to Luke, it felt like he’d just stepped from the warm beach into ice-cold water and it was all his fault.

Luke was on the brink of losing his mind again when he went out on a limb that night. He, Alex, and Reggie were about to go out exploring like they did most nights after all the lifers went to sleep and he really wasn’t keen on leaving Jordan in the studio to stew in her anger.

“C’mon, Moss, we’re going exploring!” he called up to the loft. Deciding he’d given her enough space, it was time for ambush mode.

“And why would I want to go anywhere with you?” She called back venomously, not even deigning to come to the railing of the loft or poof down to speak to him face-to-face.

He sighed, clenching his eyes shut briefly before exhaling heavily and speaking.

“Look, I’m sorry, alright?” He called back, wishing he wasn’t doing this in front of Reggie and Alex. “I shouldn’t have gone through your notebook, it was a dick move.”

Luke was surprised at how quickly she forgave him, poofing down only moments after he apologized. He stared at her surprise, his body more relaxed now that she was spending time with them again. He hoped Alex and Reggie weren’t watching him, afraid they might somehow see the pure relief and adoration that he felt for her. Maybe he was being dramatic, but he swore he stopped breathing when she finally turned to look at her. He was totally screwed.

___

The next morning was quiet, though it felt like everything had gone back to normal. Jordan was sprawled across the couch which Luke had stopped trying to claim possession over, it was his couch but at this point, it might as well have been hers. Alex was sitting across from him making a friendship bracelet that he secretly hoped was for him but thought might’ve been for Willie, and Luke was reading his book. Things were really starting to pick up in the characters’ quest and he was apparently so invested that he barely recognized Reggie’s arrival until he heard the word “gig.”

Just like that he was on his feet along with Jordan and Alex, quest entirely forgotten as they all started blurting out questions.

“Where?”

“When?’

“How?”

Reggie excitedly explained how they were having a garage party at the house so that their band could perform and Ray and some of his colleagues would record them professionally for the band’s YouTube. Then Reggie patiently explained what a YouTube was and Luke briefly wondered when he’d learned more about modern technology than the rest of them. He supposed Julie did give him that iPod.

“We’re gonna record a music video? Like on MTV?” He exclaimed excitedly after Reggie had explained.

“Yes, dude! And Julie says if we get enough views we could go big!”

Luke gaped at his three bandmates, trying to come up with a vocalization for the thoughts flying through his head. All of a sudden there was a lot at stake for this event, the whole world would be able to see their performance. It had to be perfect. They needed to practice, hell they needed to pick a song.

He needed to talk to Julie.

When he reappeared in the school hallway he realized he probably should’ve told the group where he was going but it was too late now.

“What’re you doing here?” Julie asked him after getting over the initial shock of his sudden appearance.

“We need to talk about what song we’re gonna play tonight,” Luke said excitedly, grinning at the girl. “I was thinking Great?”

Julie held up a finger to signal she needed a moment before pulling out her phone.

“Wait seriously? You’re just gonna take a call while we’re talking? That’s so rude!”

Julie rolled her eyes at his dramatics before explaining, “Otherwise people might think I’m talking to myself.”

“Right, nice, okay,” Luke nodded, impressed by her quick thinking.

It was strange to be back in a high school hallway after so long, chatting with a cute girl by the lockers. The thought immediately brought the image of Jordan. Wow, he was really screwed.

“But yeah, I think Great is a… great choice,” Julie answered his question and he nodded, satisfied with the choice.

“Alright, sweet! Well, that was pretty much all I wanted to talk to you about so…”

“Oh! Okay,” Julie said, surprised.

“Actually wait- I wanted to talk to you about Jordan,” He started. He knew he and Julie had something between them but with these rising feelings about Jordan he’d been experiencing he didn’t want to lead her on. “Look, I, uh, I don’t really know how to say this but-“

“You have a crush on Jordan!” Julie gasped, effectively cutting him off.

His cheeks turned red and he scratched the back of his neck embarrassedly.

“Yeah- I mean, I don’t know but…”

“But you don’t want to hurt me,” Julie finished and Luke raised his eyebrows in surprise.

“Wow, you are really perceptive Molina,” he said and she smiled.

“You don’t have to worry about me-“

“Sorry, my Patterson Idiocy Meter was going off,” Jordan explained as she suddenly appeared beside him, effectively putting an end to his conversation with Julie. “It lets me know when he’s doing something especially stupid.”

Luke rolled his eyes at the comment, sticking his tongue out petulantly at the girl and Julie gave him a knowing smile.

“Anyway,” Luke said dramatically, rerouting the conversation and turning back to Julie. “I was thinking, you should just ditch school today and come rehearse with us.”

He probably should’ve anticipated both girls’ protests but he still found himself trying to rationalize what he knew was a bad idea.

“Right, you were at school first, and now you’re leaving to go rehearse.”

“Stop trying to persuade her to do bad things!” Jordan chastised him, smacking his shoulder lightly.

“I really can’t. Plus I promised Nick I’d be his dance partner…” Julie explained, and Luke noticed Jordan wiggling her eyebrows at the mention of the name. He was clearly missing something.

“…and he’s heading this way,” Julie finished, pretending to hang up the phone in favor of talking to the blond-haired boy who just walked up.

“Well don’t you look sharp!” Julie’s reaction to his teasing told him all he needed to know about her feelings and the boy was not being sly about his at all. “Uh-oh, I think somebody’s got a crush on Julie!”

He couldn’t help it. It’s the designated role of all close friends to make fun of each other for their crushes. He knew by the way Julie had reacted when he’d told her about his (well, tried to tell her) that she was never going to let him hear the end of it. So, he dove right into it, mimicking Nick’s motions and facial expressions all with a playful glint in his eyes.

“Oh he is just too cute,” he teased when the blond lifer finally walked away.

“Boundaries,” Julie reminded him with a roll of her eyes. “I’ll see you after school.”

She began walking away towards her class but Luke wasn’t ready to end the conversation.

“Fine! I guess we’ll just have to carry you tonight, just like we always do!” He called down the hallway and he could see Julie shake her head slightly in exasperation. “I know you’re smiling, Molina!”

“Shut up, Luke,” Jordan rolled her eyes, smacking his chest lightly and he sent her a cheeky grin. “Good luck Julie! You’ll do great!” She called after the girl and Luke awed internally at the support.

“Yeah! Kill it on the dance floor!” He joined in, shuffling smoothly across the floor as he yelled.

“Dork,” he heard Jordan mutter and he snapped towards her, feigning upset despite how pleased he was at the attention he was getting.

“C’mon, we’ve gotta get rehearsing,” he spoke, brushing off the dramatics but she waved him off.

“I’ll be right there.”

He frowned, wanting her to come with him but he poofed away anyway, landing back in the garage between Reggie and Alex.

They immediately got to work, Luke walking them through Great. He felt bad doing it without Jordan since it was really her and Julie’s song more than anything, but he really wanted them to sound as best as they could. It was her song and they needed to do it justice.

They’d only just gotten through the basic structure and Jordan’s plans for the song, which she’d scribbled into the margins of his notebook pages while they worked on it together, when they were interrupted by a face in the window.

“Again? What’s all that about?” Reggie asked when Willie’s face disappeared from view, the boy clearly knowing he’d been caught.

Luke shrugged in response, just as lost as the rest but Alex stood, seemingly determined to get answers this time as he poofed out.

Despite their typical itch to snoop, the two boys gave Willie and Alex their privacy, instead moving over to their respective instruments to tune and warm up while they waited.

Luke could tell something was off when Alex returned but the blond-haired ghost had gone straight for his drumset, insisting that they start rehearsing. So, Luke didn’t push it, until about halfway through the song Alex got a little too into his drums, no longer playing along.

“Alex are you alright?” He asked sincerely once he’d stopped playing.

“Yeah... yeah, why?” Alex asked, trying to brush it off but Luke and Reggie had already connected the dots.

Alex only ever played like that when he was upset and since he was in a good mood before Willie showed up, it wasn’t difficult to figure out.

“I know it’s tough man. People say you never forget your first ghost.” Reggie spike sympathetically, “but... I’m sure there will be others.”

“Yeah, thanks Reg,” Alex nodded and Luke stepped forward, clutching his guitar strap as if to brace himself. He wasn’t very good at expressing things outside of music.

“Yeah, and Alex, you’re a great drummer and a great guy, okay?” He said, leaning onto the drumset slightly as he spoke. “I wouldn’t let all that stuff get in between you and what you love.”

Alex nodded and Luke finally noticed Jordan’s presence in the studio. He’d started to take steps in her direction to ask when she’d gotten there when Reggie spoke up again.

“I don’t know, sometimes a little fire onstage can make things better,” he said suggestively and Luke froze in the center of the band setup. “Like you and Julie.”

His head immediately snapped towards Jordan, trying to gauge her reaction to the statement. He was already certain she thought there was something between him and Julie, she’d written a whole song out of jealousy after all, but he needed her to know that wasn’t true.

“Uh, what... what is that supposed to mean?” Luke asked, trying to play innocent and hoping Reggie would get the hint and back off.

“C’mon, everyone can see the way you look at her when you sing,” Reggie chuckled, clearly not understanding. “You guys ooze chemistry.”

“Please never say ooze again,” Alex said to Reggie before turning to Luke, “But you have to agree he’s right.”

“No, no.” Luke denied vehemently, chancing another nervous glance at Jordan only to find she had become suddenly very interested in her shoes. “I have chemistry with everyone I sing with.”

It felt like a reasonable excuse to him, and it wasn’t exactly wrong. He did have chemistry when he sang with people, but it wasn’t because of the person, it was because of the music. Still, Reggie and Alex gave him looks of disbelief and he huffed and rolled his eyes.

“Seriously, watch,” he said, taking a determined step towards Jordan. Sure he was trying to prove a point to the guys, but maybe he could prove something else to himself and Jordan.

Still, before he could even take another step she stopped him.

“You’d better take that step back,” she demanded, not even looking up from the floor and his heart sank.  

He shook it off with a sigh, still determined to prove his point to the guys. So he turned on his heel, confidently stepping towards Reggie as he began to sing.

“I believe, I believe that we’re just one dream away from who we’re meant to be.” When he got close enough, he slipped his hand around the back of the bassist‘s neck, pulling their faces even closer together. “That we’re standing on the edge of… great.”

He winked at the boy when he finished and stepped back, watching with a smirk as Reggie gulped. Mission accomplished.

“Wow,” Alex remarked, “I see chemistry.”

“Yeah, that was pretty hot,” Reggie admitted, voice cracking as he spoke.

Riding on the high of his success, Luke took it one step further, kissing two of his fingers before placing them on Reggie’s lips. When he heard a giggle from behind him he whirled around to grin at Jordan, elated that he could turn her mood around. She rolled her eyes in response but he didn’t care. He was starting to think maybe they were a sign of endearment from her with how much she did it.  

“Girls, amiright?” Reggie croaked out and Luke chuckled.

“Yeah,” he agreed and Alex quickly chimed in.

“No,” the drummer said definitively with a light chuckle.

Jordan barked out a laugh at that, poofing over to the drummer to give him a high five before poofing back to the front of the band setup. Luke shook his head at that, ducking his head to hide his smile as he slipped his guitar strap back across his body.

Practice went smoothly after that, though Jordan and Reggie insisted on messing around until Julie got there. He felt kinda lonely with Jordan now hanging out on Reggie’s side of the setup but it was worth it to see her smile and hear her laughter. He didn’t even have the heart to tell them to take this practice seriously since they had a performance tonight. When the hell did he become so whipped for a girl he wasn’t even sure liked him back?

He couldn’t begrudge them their fun, even screwing around Jordan and Reggie were some of the best musicians he knew and it was obvious when Julie got there. They only had an hour of true, focused rehearsal with the whole group yet it sounded amazing. Still, Luke was nervous. If he’d had his way, they would’ve practice until it was perfect but he knew that wasn’t reasonable.

Luke was bummed when Jordan left to get ready in Julie’s room. He figured they needed their “girl time” or whatever but- though he’d never say it out loud- watching Jordan do her makeup had become part of his pre-performance routine and he was a bit fascinated by the whole ordeal. Instead, he spent the time leading up to their performance reading his book or talking with Alex and Reggie.

Luke’s nerves didn’t present themselves outwardly as much as Jordan’s did. It was something he’d noticed back when they’d both started performing. When Jordan got nervous she moved, flicking and shaking her hands, bouncing in place, anything to stop her standing still. Luke, on the other hand, internalized his nerves. He would become uncharacteristically quiet the closer he got. When he first started performing for crowds his hands would tremble, something he’d had to figure out how to counteract pretty quickly because it’s really hard to play the guitar with shaky hands.

Still, pre-performance nerves were when his insecurities popped up the most so when he looked up and saw Jordan, Alex, and Reggie all holding hands in the garage while Julie started the song, he felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. He probably looked like a kicked puppy but he felt like one. His bandmates had left him out of something.

As if reading his thoughts, Jordan reached her hand out to him in a silent invitation to join whatever pre-show ritual they’d started without his knowledge. As soon as he took her hand he understood why they did it: silent solidarity. A small but strong reminder that they were in this together. Then Jordan squeezed his hand lightly, giving him just enough time to squeeze back before they were poofing onstage, well, onto the driveway.

Julie and Jordan were electric in center stage and all five of them were sounding great (no pun intended). Everything was going perfectly until Luke nodded his head at Jordan, silently asking her to come share his mic but she pointedly ignored him. Luke furrowed his brow in confusion as she angled her body away from him as she picked up the next verse.

Maybe it was a mistake, he thought, trying it again as he and Julie joined her vocals.

“Sometimes we gotta lean, lean on someone else to get a little help until we find a way,” they sang together, and Luke frowned slightly. Those lines had always made him think of Jordan, especially after his birthday and it hurt extra that she was ignoring him.

He tried to ignore the stab of jealousy he felt when she moved to the other side of the setup to sing to Alex by focusing on the music and singing with Reggie but it didn’t fully work. He still wanted her attention and he wanted to know why he wasn’t getting it.

His wounded puppy eyes were fully intact when he stepped up beside where Julie crouched on the piano to play his guitar solo. She gave him a sympathetic smile before shrugging lightly, seemingly understanding why he was upset but also unaware as to why he was being shunned. It made him feel a bit better, at least he wasn’t the only one in the dark. As the section came to an end he noticed her eyes flicking out to the crowd and followed them, spotting a familiar blond. He sent her a teasing wink as he hit the last note and she stood fully on the piano in what was a truly epic moment. That girl was a performer through and through.

He slid back to his microphone behind the piano, still hurt but pushing it aside to finish out the performance. Now really wasn’t the time to get lost in speculation and self-pity.

He was surprised when he and the guys returned to invisibility only to see Jordan still out there, singing and playing along with Julie. It was clearly a beautiful and emotional moment for the two and he wondered when they’d planned it. Still, that wasn’t his first question when he finally got time to talk to the ghost girl.

“Hey, so, how come you were ignoring me out there?” He asked her after the lifers had evacuated the driveway.

Reggie and Alex were playing some basketball on the hoop hanging from the garage door while Jordan was perched on the ledge at the end of the driveway, scribbling into her notebook.

“What are you talking about?” She asked, looking up to stare at him in confusion.

“During the performance… I wanted you to come sing with me…” he spoke, leaving pauses in hopes that she’d catch on and put him out of his misery but she never did. “C’mon Moss, I did the head nod and everything!”

“Those were for me?” She exclaimed, looking at him like he’d lost his mind, “I thought you were trying to get Julie!”

He felt the relief wash over him with those words. So it was just a simple misunderstanding.

The relief was short-lived, however, as the four of them were suddenly struck through with another jolt, sending the three guys sprawling to the ground and Jordan doubling over.

“Jesus fuck,” he heard Jordan curse as she clutched her chest and he groaned in agreement, pushing himself off the cement.

“That wasn’t like the other ones,” he said, “It’s getting worse.”

“Why is this happening to us?” Reggie asked, still bent over as he recovered.

“It’s because you guys are in serious trouble,” Willie answered, nervously approaching the four ghosts. “We need to talk.”

They all nodded in agreement, silently moving together before Willie poofed them to Hollywood.

They followed him along the Walk of Fame as he explained all about how Caleb’s stamp was the reason the jolts kept happening. That he’d stamped them to force them to work for him because they were too powerful.

“So, if we don’t join his club, the weird power outage thing continues until there’s no power left at all?” Reggie asked, crossing his arms over his chest nervously.

“Yes,” Willie answered, not meeting any of their eyes.

“What exactly happens when the power goes out?”

“That’s… that’s it. You’re done.”

Luke heard Jordan suck in a breath beside him, freezing in her tracks and the rest of the group slowed to a halt.

“Yeah, what do you mean by ‘we’re done?’” Reggie asked the question none of them wanted to hear the answer to.

“You just… you don’t exist… anymore. Not anywhere.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jordan slap a hand over her mouth as if to cover up a sob. He knew she was thinking about her parents, how she’d never see them again because of this and his blood began to boil.

“So what, we have to give up everything and work for Caleb for eternity?” He spat angrily, “That’s some club you guys got going on.”

He took a step back, reaching down discretely to grab Jordan’s hand, hoping to provide her with any kind of comfort and support.

“But there is another way,” Willie explained, “That’s why I’m here.”

“Another option?” Alex asked skeptically.

“Just please, hear me out.” Willie pleaded, and Luke shared a look with the other guys. “Alright. If you guys could figure out what your unfinished business is, you do it in time, you could cross over and be free from all of this.”

“Okay, so what’s our unfinished business?” Luke asked, squeezing Jordan’s hand reassuringly. He’d figure it out just for her.

“I don’t know,” Willie said. “But since you all died at the same time it could be something you all have to do together.”

Luke’s mind began whirling, trying to figure out what it could be. He was so caught up in his thoughts that he barely registered Willie departing, or Alex and Reggie talking.

“We have to figure out our unfinished business,” he insisted, finally joining in on the conversation.

“Yeah, man, and how are we supposed to do that? Alright?” Alex asked frustratedly. “There was so much we wanted to do.”

The combination of Alex’s words and him noticing the sign in the background brought upon Luke’s epiphany.

“Yeah, but the night we died, there was only one thing we wanted to do together,” he explained, pointing towards the Orpheum sign with his free hand.

Part 11

___

JATP Taglist: @meangirlsx @morganayennefertyrell

Sunset Swerve Taglist: @oopsiedoopsie23 @angryknightstatesmantrash @onlygetaway @deni-gonzalez @advicefromnixxxx @brooke0297 @vicesvsvirtuesfanfic @cordeliascrown

[atamascolily]

The cover art of Junior Jedi Knights: Promises by Nancy Richardson has Anakin about to be eaten by a giant green dragon on what appears to be Tatooine while Sand People lurk in the distance and a terrified Tahiri swings a gaderiffi stick at the dragon while trying not to trip over human skulls. So I'm all-in, despite the incredibly vague title.

Anakin dreams he's back in the Palace of Woolamanders with the golden globe (not the prestigious TV award), arguing with a Sith who turns out to be... himself! Becuse if you're not grappling with the legacy of your fucked-up grandfather, then what is even the point of being named after him?

(I get why Leia names him after her father. I really do. Still, was it necessary to give this poor kid EVEN MORE ANGST than his siblings?)

Tahiri wakes Anakin up. Her six-month trial period at the Academy is up, and she has to go back to Tatooine to tell Sliven, the leader of her tribe, her decision. *hums "Should I Stay or Should I Go"* Of course, we already know what the answer's going to be, but okay fine, field trip to Tatooine, let's go.

As you can imagine, Luke has Opinions about these two:

Luke Skywalker studied the look of defiance. Green eyes flashed, and white blonde hair surrounded a stubborn nine-year-old face. Luke’s blue eyes didn’t falter as he waited for the child to speak. It would not be long. Tahiri was rarely lost for words. Luke thought about the time she and his nephew, Anakin Solo, had snuck away from the Jedi academy. They’d returned to the Great Temple in the middle of the night. Tired and dirty, Tahiri had immediately begun chattering, trying to take all the blame for the adventure, trying to keep Luke’s punishment from extending to Anakin. What Luke hadn’t told either of them was that they were two of the most promising students he’d ever seen. There was no way he would expel either student. They would make great Jedi Knights one day-if they could keep out of trouble long enough to learn to use the Force.

Trouble seemed to find Tahiri and Anakin. Only last week they’d returned bruised and battered from Yavin 8, where they’d gone to help another candidate, a Melodie named Lyric, survive her changing ceremony. While on Yavin 8, the two candidates had fought giant black rodents, vicious snakes, and a red-bristled spider that trapped its prey in thick black webs and consumed it alive. Luke Skywalker believed that experience was the best teacher in the use of the Force, but Anakin and Tahiri always rushed headlong into dangerous situations.

That worried Luke.

I don't know why Luke is surprised, given that he knows Leia and Han's approach to parenting, and also he's ostensibly been teaching the twins. Compared to the trouble Jacen and Jaina get up to, Anakin's barely scratched the surface.

Tahiri says she doesn't want to go back to Tatooine, but Luke mentions his own issues about not going back to say good-bye to his family there, and asks Tahiri if she wants that. Then Luke goes to ask good old Peckhum to take them all to Tatooine - because this time, Luke's going, too.

And Luke had a strange feeling that Tahiri’s family, the Tusken Raiders, were dangerous as well.

No, REALLY? YOU THINK?

Ikrit's going to spend the entire book sleeping in Anakin's bed again, I see. Smart guy.

Tahiri has a pendant macguffin with her parents' thumbprints - a gift from Sliven. Sliven won't talk about Tahiri's parents, and she doesn't know why.

“All I know is that the Tusken Raiders are the only family I’ve ever known. The only family I have. If I choose to remain at the academy, I’ll lose them forever. I’ll truly be an orphan.”

I don't see why it's an all-or-nothing deal, except for drama, but... okay then.

“I feel so mixed-up right now. I’m about to return to the only home I know. It’s a place I hate and love, both at the same time. Just as I hate and love the Tusken Raiders. My life is as confusing to me as the golden globe. Except, unlike with the globe, I don’t have any clue about who I really am. I don’t even know if Tahiri is my real name, or just a name given to me by Sliven.”

TAHIRI *IS* YOUR REAL NAME, YOU ALREADY SAID HE WAS YOUR FATHER. Look, I sympathize with Tahiri's confusion, because it's GOT to be hard to feel like you never fit into either world you belong to, but... ADOPTED FAMILY IS JUST AS REAL (sometimes more so) than blood family and I hope the final moral will be Tahiri learning that.

Oh, and I thought Luke was coming along, but no, it's Tionne! This makes sense because Tionne was the one who found Tahiri on Tatooine in the first place, and also I love Tionne, so I'm happy the author's given her something to do in this book.

The Jedi instructor Tionne glanced back to make sure her two charges were seated. Luke Skywalker had sent her to watch over Anakin and Tahiri on Tatooine-to make sure that nothing harmed them. And that Tahiri returned to the Jedi academy, if she wished.

HAHAHA, I already know from the cover this is not going to work out, but hopefully Tionne will at least give it the old college try...

The Sand People are waiting for them, and there's some initial conflict, which Tahiri quickly smoothes over. Tahiri isn't wearing her face coverings or shoes, and Sliven is okay with that, so I guess this book isn't going to go the whole "unclothed flesh is abomination" route of other Legends books. Also, the narrative always refers to them as "Tusken Raiders" which is NOT what they call themselves - it's what the settlers call them. This is fine if we're seeing things from Anakin's or Tionne's POV, but not when it's Tahiri's! That's NOT how somebody raised by these people would think of them!! ARRGH!!

Anakin wishes they'd landed at Mos Eisley. LOL. Like Tionne would ever take you there. He's distracted by Tahiri re-uniting with her bantha, Bangor - Sliven says they don't name them, but Tahiri does anyway. Tahiri has a rappor with Bangor because he's an orphan, too... And here Sliven (rightfully) gets mad and says she's not an orphan and they need to go.

You will not be surprised to learn that Anakin Solo hates sand.

Oh, apparently, the rest of the Sand People don't trust Tahiri and they're the ones who issued the ultimatum that she has to choose between them or the Jedi. I don't know why Sliven negotiated this homecoming-of-sorts, but plot, I guess.

“Sliven knows that if I choose to remain at the academy the tribe will refuse to take me back. I think that having me return to make my decision was Sliven’s way of giving me one last chance to remain with the tribe, and with him.”

“It sounds like he truly cares for you,” Anakin offered.

“Cares?” Tahiri weighed the word thoughtfully. “In his own way, I know he does. But he’s never cared enough to give me the one thing in my life that I wanted. He has never told me the story of how he found me. And if he truly cared, he would give me my history,” Tahiri ended sadly.

I am 100% on Sliven's side here, although I sympathize with Tahiri's yearning to know more about her past.

There's a woman named Vexa, who hates Tahiri. She also hates Sliven because he brought an outsider into the tribe. If Tahiri lives, Sliven gets to lead, and if not, he's going to die. Tahiri is pissed because Sliven never mentioned this before.

(Tionne is doing all the translating here for some reason, even though Tahiri is speaking in Basic to Vexa, and it's not clear to me if the narrative has established that why she WOULD speak Basic?? But okay...yay, Tionne!)

Basically, Tahiri's trial is a version of a walkabout in the Dune Sea and Jundland Waste crossed with hide and seek to rejoin the tribe. If she doesn't do this, she has to go back to the Academy and Sliven dies. Now Tionne is pissed because neither she nor Luke knew this was on the table, and they don't want Tahiri getting hurt.

Sliven's bait for getting Tahiri to participate is the truth about her parents.... which seems really convoluted and complicated, but okay. Of course Tahiri accepts, so Anakin decides to go to. Tionne tells them no but Sliven says they'll fight her, so... there's that. Okay then.

(Sigh. Tionne, you're a Jedi! Use your words to persuade them! Sing them to sleep or something! Don't just stand there and... abdicate responsibility here!)

(Yes, I know this is JF and that's why Adults Are Useless, because this is an escapist fantasy for the youth, but... really? REALLY??)

Sliven was injured in battle with smugglers and taken in by Cassa and Tryst Veila, two moisture farmers, and their three-year-old Tahiri. He becomes part of the family - they teach him Basic, he teaches Tryst how to fight with a gaderiffi. In a plot decision that makes me wince, Tryst is instantly better than Sliven, despite the fact that Sliven has trained his entire fucking life with this weapon and I just... Can't Even... but Tryst was Force-sensitive and I'm just... THAT'S NOT HOW THE FORCE WORKS, OKAY???

Anyway, Sliven and Tryst are sparring, and the rest of the tribe (do they have a name?? apparently not) see them, think Sliven's being attacked, and kill Tryst and Cassa. Vexa wants to let Tahiri die, too, and Sliven refuses, so they make this stupid bargain. Apparently, the Sand Peoples' kids reach adulthood at nine, so that's why they're doing this now. Oh, and Sliven made the thumbprint necklace macguffin after Tryst and Cassa died, which is... really creepy. Sliven is consumed with guilt, and Tahiri lectures him about caring and I just... can't... even...

But she wants Sliven's thumbprint on the macguffin next to her parents, so at least she gets THAT right.

Anyway, they drop Anakin and Tahiri in the desert and ride off, and Tahiri nearly gets eaten by a tentacle monster (a Sarlacc? unclear) and Anakin has to save her, and I just... why. Tahiri grew up here, she should know how to handle this planet, not be rescued by Anakin, who's never been here in his life. Fuck that.

Next encounter on the wandering monster table is... Jawas! Anakin fixes their broken sandcrawler with his magic tech powers, but only after mind-tricking them into letting him aboard, and I just... I feel like this is ethically compromising and maybe somebody who's worried about becoming like his evil granddad maybe should be a bit more careful about manipulating the free will of sentient beings??

Anyway, they jump-start the crawler and the grateful Jawas give them food and water and a ride and two gaderiffi sticks. Womp rats scream in the distance. They find bodies. They're being stalked by a krayt dragon but Tahiri only thought to mention that now.

Krayt dragons were large carnivorous reptiles that lived in the mountains surrounding Tatooine’s Jundland Wastes. Some thought that the dragons no longer existed, that they’d become extinct when settlers came to Tatooine, exposing them to various infections as well as hunting them for food and trophies.

This is an interesting world-building detail I'd never heard before!

Anakin tries to mind-trick the krayt dragon, but it doesn't work, so Tahiri rescues him. They make it out, and keep going. They're almost out of water, and Tahiri finds a hubba gourd for Anakin's wounds. Tahiri decides to use the Force to call Bangor, and it doesn't work until she and Anakin call together. They get back just as Vexa's trying to declare Tahiri dead. Tahiri makes a dramatic entrance.

Sliven wins! He says this means Tahiri is now a part of the tribe for real. Tahiri disagrees:

“I now understand that I was never a Tusken Raider. The skills we both used to survive weren’t the skills of a Raider. We used the Force. And now I know that I’m meant to attend the academy. To grow strong, and to use that strength to break the curse of the golden globe, and one day become a Jedi Knight.”

WHAT. I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU DIDN'T USE ANY OF THE SKILLS SLIVEN TAUGHT YOU TO SURVIVE. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT.

(It's fine if that's Tahiri's decision - indeed, given the set-up of the book I would expect no less- but the reasoning here. I just... arrrrghhh.)

“What about Sliven? Won’t you miss him?” Anakin asked.

“That’s the hardest part,” Tahiri said sadly. “I love Sliven, but I know that I belong at the Jedi academy, not with the Sand People.”

“Then let us leave here,” Tionne said.

FINALLY TIONNE TAKES SOME AGENCY BESIDES STANDING AROUND AND LOOKING WORRIED.

But Tahiri gets Sliven's thumbprint on her pendant and take care of her bantha (forever!) and they leave. Anakin has a fever from his wounds. Luke is not pleased.

Luke Skywalker waited for the Lightning Rod’s cargo bay to open. Slowly the massive jaws of the bay yawned wide, revealing Luke’s nephew and Tahiri. Luke was pleased to see that the girl had returned. She belonged at the Jedi academy. He moved forward to greet the Jedi candidates.

“Welcome home-” Master Luke began. But his words caught in his throat as he stared at his students. Anakin struggled to stand and walk down the cargo bay’s ramp. Old Peckhum held one of his arms tightly, steadying him as hewalked. Anakin took several tottering steps, then fell forward. Luke anticipated his nephew’s collapse, and caught the boy in his arms.

Gently he lowered Anakin to the ground. Anakin’s academy jumpsuit was shredded on one side, revealing five gashes. There were dark circles under his eyes, and bruises were visible on his neck and hands. Tahiri knelt by her friend. The girl did not look much better, Luke thought in dismay. Spots of dried blood lined her jumpsuit in a pattern that looked like jaw marks. She, too, looked tired and hungry.

Luke’s eyes met Tionne’s for a brief moment. From her look of torment, he knew she’d tried her best to protect the children.

“Hi, Uncle Luke,” Anakin said with a small voice.

“What happened?” Luke asked in a voice full of worry.

“The Tusken Raiders had a little more in mind for me than just deciding whether or not to remain with the tribe,” Tahiri replied.

“We’ll talk later,” Luke said quietly to Tionne. “Right now, you are both going to the medical droid.” With that, he swept his nephew up in his arms and strode toward the turbolift, with Tahiri trailing.

I CAN'T. I CAN'T EVEN.

WHAT THE HELL IS LUKE GOING TO SAY TO TIONNE?

Anakin wakes up attended by a medical droid and also Luke. Leia wants Anakin home, but Han and Luke intervened. Remind me why Leia sent her kids here again? Doesn't she KNOW Luke's teaching style by now?

“Now get well, or Leia will never forgive me,” Luke instructed. Luke Skywalker sat beside his nephew as he slept. He wondered if the strange feeling of untold danger he’d sensed before sending the children to Tatooine had been a premonition of the promise Tahiri had chosen to keep. Luke closed his eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. At least the children were safe.

No, Luke, that was called BEING A RESPONSIBLE ADULT, and YOU MISSED IT YET AGAIN.

Anakin falls asleep and goes back to his dream from the beginning, and uses the Force "to control his inner self", whatever that means. Tahiri wakes him up. Ikrit makes a dramatic entrance.

The Jedi Master, his white fur and the stones of the Great Temple strangely blending, scurried from the corner and leapt onto the window ledge. “After all,” he rasped, “this is only one battle of good versus evil. There will be others, if you are not up to the fight.”

Thnks, Captain Obvious! Anakin and Tahiri decide to go ahead and Ikrit... runs away, because they have to do this On Their Own. Sigh. This time, they walk to the Palace of the Woolamanders and I don't know why they couldn't just do that in Book One. Sigh. The evil voices try to use Tahiri's history against her, and she cites ALL her parents in rebuffing them. YES, GOOD. Then they try to use Darth Vader against Anakin and he laughs and the evil subsides. YES, GOOD.

Anakin and Tahiri enter the globe and free the childrens' spriits. The globe shatters and I half-expected the temple to crumble to pieces as they leave but it doesn't. Apparently, Ikrit went to get Luke, who is waiting for them outside.

“You know everything?” Anakin asked his uncle, gesturing toward Ikrit.

Luke Skywalker nodded. He wrapped his arms around Anakin’s and Tahiri’s shoulders.

“I am very proud,” Luke said, his eyes meeting theirs.

Slowly the group walked back toward the Jedi academy. For the first time in a long time, Anakin and Tahiri were not heading toward danger, but simply toward the future-adventure, the Force, and their ultimate goal: to become Jedi Knights.

The end.

OKAY THEN.

So, I didn't think the globe arc was going to resolve so quickly, but okay, fine, whatever. I thought that was going to be an entire book on its own. Tionne is basically useless here, which annoys me and I don't even know why she came at all. Luke is incredibly irresponsible, and Ikrit doesn't do anything. WHY. WHY. SUCH A WASTE. Sliven deserves better, and this book makes me angry at Tahiri for treating him the way she does for most of it. The crappy worldbuilding makes me cranky. I didn't feel like Books 1 and 2 could benefit much from re-writes, but this one is crying out for fix-it fics because HONESTLY.

[sugarcoated-pain]

Heavy Rotation Part 4

Hey guys! I’m excited to share this next part with you! Let me know what you think! As always, big thanks to @sublimehood for making sure this shit is actually worth posting! haha

Warnings: Mild drug (just pot) and alcohol usage, cussing.. that’s about it. lol.

Best Friends to Lovers- original character + Ashton

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

As is to be expected, I slept for most of New Year’s Day. Things were pretty quiet, so I assume the others did the same thing. I lay awake in bed that afternoon staring at the ceiling, dreading leaving my room after what had happened. Would things between Ashton and I be awkward now? Would he be mad at me? Would he pretend nothing happened? My brain analyzed every possible scenario over and over again. I eventually decided that I couldn’t hide in my room all day and would have to greet the day, whatever it may bring.

Georgia and Calum were watching TV on the couch when I entered the living room.

“Good morning sunshine.” Calum’s tone is dry and unenthusiastic. He is clearly also suffering from the night before.

“Hey guys,” I grumble, taking a seat on the other sofa. “Where’s everybody else?”

“Mikey is hung over as fuck and went back to bed. Luke disappeared halfway through the night, and never came back. We think he left with some girl at some point.” Georgia answers, “but since I know you’re actually referring to Ashton, he went over to Camille’s to tell her the truth about what happened last night.”

My eyes go wide and I glare at Georgia, looking quickly to Calum and then back to Georgia.

“Relax. He already knows.” she responds.

“GREAT. Thanks G.” I retort sarcastically.

“Actually, Ashton told me.” Cal replies.

“WAIT WHAT?!” my eyes go wide again. “What did he say?!?!”

“NOPE. Not playing that game.”

Before I can respond, the front door opens and Ashton walks through. He looks like HELL. I mean, let’s be real, even at his worst, he looks better than anyone else I’ve ever seen, but this might be his WORST. His appearance is disheveled and he’s clearly hung over, but there is something else there. His eyes are red and puffy, and he has a pained look on his face that I never wanted to see.

“Hey Ash… everything okay?” I ask, concerned. He plops down on the couch next to me and buries his face in his hands. I exchange a quick worried look with Georgia and turn back to Ashton.

He’s quiet for a few moments, and then without lifting his head, says “I went over to talk to Camille… and there was another guy there.”

The other three of us gasp. “Are you fucking kidding me??” Calum says angrily.

“Nope” Ashton answers as he sits up and leans back on the couch. “Apparently she’s been seeing him behind my back for about six months now..”

I sit up straight, “Georgia, let’s go. We’re beating this bitch’s ass right now.”

As I begin standing up, Ashton puts his hand on my arm to stop me and gently pushes me back onto the couch.

Georgia ignores me and watches him sympathetically. “Ash, I’m so sorry. That is so shitty.”

He sighs. “I should have known. I’m so stupid.”

“You’re not stupid.” I answer quickly. “She’s a horrible bitch and I really hate her now.”

“You always hated her..” he comments..

“I strongly disliked her before but now I HATE her for doing this to you.” I’m in best friend mode right now. Last night is completely out the window at this point. I rest my hand gently on his shoulder supportively. He looks up at me, those perfect eyes filled with pain, and my heart shatters. How could anyone do this to him? How could this bitch not realize what she had?

“What did I do, Em? What did I do wrong to deserve this?” he asks me quietly, leaning his head on my shoulder.

Georgia, clearly coming to the conclusion that this is not the time for an audience, suggests, “hey Cal, why don’t we go grab some food or something to cheer Ash up?”

Picking up on the cue, “yeah okay. Your favorite pizza and beer, sound good buddy?” Calum adds. Ashton shrugs, and the two of them get up to leave.

Once they’re gone, I turn to Ashton.”Wanna go up to the roof?”

“Sure.” He shrugs again.

“Okay. I’ll meet you up there. I gotta grab something.” I reply and stand up to head to my bedroom. When I get there, I pack the last of my pot into Ashton's favorite pipe. After that, I reach under my bed and pull out a small shopping bag. I grab my acoustic guitar and lighter along with everything else and climb out my window onto the fire escape.

Ashton is waiting for me when I get up to the roof. I hand him the pipe and lighter and sit down next to him, setting my guitar on my other side.

“I got you something. It reminded me of you so I got it for your birthday, but I don't want to wait that long and I think you could use it now.” I say as I hand him the bag before he can light the pipe. With a questioning look at me, he reaches into the bag and pulls out a dark red, ornate journal with a matching pen. “This kind is my favorite for writing music in, and this one made me think of you for some reason.”

He spends a few moments examining the journal, then turns to me with a look of mild disbelief, followed by a smile. “Thanks, Em.”

“I write when I'm going through some shit, and I know you're the same way, so I figured you could use it now.” I add with a shrug.

After looking it over for a little while longer, he sets it down and lights the pipe, handing it to me after taking a hit. “Hey… about last night..” he starts.

“Don't. We don't have to talk about it now.. or ever. I messed up.” I answer quickly.

“No. I mean… I just don't want things to be weird between us.. especially now. I could really use my best friend right about now…”

“Calum?”I ask with a smirk and take a hit off the pipe.

“No, dork. I mean you.”

“I can handle that role.” I reply, passing the pipe back to him.

“Or maybe even .. best friends with benefits?” I can’t tell if he’s joking or not.

“Suggest that again when you’re not so vulnerable..” I say with a short laugh, half hoping he’s not joking. I pick up my guitar to prevent myself from looking as awkward as I feel right now and start lightly strumming. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see that he has started writing in the journal. We sit like this for a while in comfortable silence.  Eventually, I ask, “Do you wanna talk about the Camille thing or would you rather just chill?”

“I think I’d rather just chill for now.” he lets out a sigh and leans back, staring out at the city ahead. “What’s that you’re playing?” he asks.

“Eh, just a little something I’ve been working on lately…”

“You wrote that? Are there lyrics yet?”  

“Yeah.. it’s basically done. I haven’t played it for anybody yet…”

“Can I hear it?”

I stop strumming and turn to look at him. The look on his face is one of genuine interest. “You sure? I don’t really know how good it is..”

“I’ll tell you if it’s good or not, just let me hear it.”

I sigh. “Alright.” I begin playing the riff he had just heard, only louder and more deliberate now. After a few seconds, I start singing along. I don’t know why I’m nervous, I’ve sang for Ashton dozens of times. Maybe it’s because of what happened last night. Maybe it’s the fact that this is an extremely personal song that means a lot to me. I glance over at him every now and then, and every time, he is watching me intently. I can feel my cheeks getting red. Why am I being so weird about this? I finish the song and look over at him expectantly.

His expression is impossible to read. After a few seconds, he starts to stand up. “C’mon. I have an idea.” he says, reaching his hand down to help me up as well.

“What? Where are we going?”

“Just follow me.” He heads back down the fire escape in the direction of his room, then climbs through the window. I follow behind him. I’ve only been in his room a couple times and I try to take in as much as I can every time. It smells like him. It’s a little messy, but not gross. There’s band posters on the walls and random musical instruments all over the place. Ashton grabs his keys off his dresser then pulls me by my hand out of the room. He continues out of the apartment, down the stairs. The record store and studio are closed for the holiday, so it’s dark downstairs when he unlocks the back door to the store. Once we are through the purple curtains, he flips the lights on in the recording studio.

“Ash.. what are we……” I start to ask, completely confused.

“That song was incredible and I want you to record it.”

“What the hell? Are we even allowed to be in here?”

“I’m vulnerable right now, remember? I can do whatever I want. And I want to help you record a demo using that song you just played for me.”

My brain can’t process what he is telling me, so I just stare at him in disbelief. He turns the rest of the lights on and starts to turn on the machines. “Go on, get in the booth.” He motions for me to enter.

“You’re insane.. Are you serious right now?”

“YES. I just got my heart broken and this is a damn good distraction now get your ass in the booth and sing for me.”

I feel like I could cry. A mix of every possible emotion rushes through my body, and I’m eventually able to convince my legs to carry me into the recording booth. I sit on the stool that’s already in the room and position my guitar. Watching Ashton through the glass, I wait for his signal. When he gives me the thumbs up, I take a deep breath, and start to play. My song flows out of me. I know if I think too much, I’ll fuck it up, so I allow the music to take over. I’m not paying attention to anything but this song- not the fact that my life long dream might finally be coming true, not the gorgeous man on the other side of the glass making it a reality-nothing but the song. Approximately two and a half minutes later, it’s over. I’m shaking from head to toe, I’m almost hysterical. I set my guitar down and run out of the booth. Ashton is grinning from ear to ear. I practically jump into his arms to hug him.

“That felt so amazing. Oh my god I can’t believe I just did that!” The hug lasts a little longer than it should, and take one awkward little step back from him, still beaming though.

“You sounded fantastic. I’m really fucking proud of you right now.”

If I wasn’t blushing before, I definitely am now.

“There you guys are! We’ve been looking everywhere!” Calum and Georgia push through the heavy curtain. “We’ve got pizza and beer upstairs… what’re you guys doing down here?”

“Emma wrote a kick ass song and I just helped her record it for a demo.” Ashton says, beaming down at me with pride.

Georgia turns to me excitedly, and bounce over to her and jump up and down while squealing. It’s real cute, I promise. The rest of the evening involves the four of us eating pizza, drinking beer, talking about music and watching movies, and never once mentioning that bitch Camille’s name.

Part Five

Part Six

Part Seven

Part Eight

taglist: @cheyenne-in-wonderland @drummerboy794 @harrysgucciclothes @emmamarshmellow

let me know if you’d like to be added to the list for future parts! Also, if you’re enjoying this series, I’d love it if you could reblog so others can see it too! THANKS! <3 

[ificouldflytotheclouds]

Youngblood Song Ranking

In honor of Youngblood being out for 2 weeks, this is my initial ranking of the songs. I don’t believe a ranking of songs on an album is ever solidified, certain songs have a different meaning as you go through different life experiences, a heartbreak, a memory, an appreciation to a part of the song that you didn’t notice to before, etc… I want to create a post explaining my ranking now so I can refer to it later in time to see how it shift over time.

I’d love to know what you’re ranking of the songs are, do you agree or disagree with me?

First, I am going to split the songs into 4 categories and attempt to rank them from there (their order may still shift from that position)

1. Early Release/Songs performed on 5SOS3 tour.

Youngblood, Want You Back, Lie To Me, Valentine, Moving Along, and Talk Fast

2. Top Songs

Ghost of You, Monster Among Men, If Walls Could Talk, More, Babylon

3. Lower Ranked Songs

Best Friend, Woke Up In Japan, Empty Wallets, When You Walk Away

4. Middle Ranked Songs

Better Man, Why Won’t You Love Me, Midnight, Meet You There

1. Early Release/Songs performed on 5SOS3 tour.

I decided to have this as a separate category because at this point in time the songs might not be well represented within the album ranking because I’ve heard them more than rest of the songs on the album. 

Starting with the singles youngblood > want you back. The first time I heard the studio version of youngblood my jaw was on the ground, I had heard the live version prior because I was trying to learn some of the lyrics to the new songs before my show, and yet I was still blown away. Personally, I like the studio version of Youngblood better than the live version because I feel like it goes harder. Additionally, it’s a song that deserves to be danced to and you can’t do that at a GA concert. 

Out of the other 4 songs, they are ranked as the following

Lie to Me

Moving Along

Talk Fast

Valentine 

The thing I find interesting about 5sos’ music is how different an experience it can be depending on if you are listening to it on headphones, a stereo, live, or in an acoustic format. With headphones, you can pay more attention to each element of the song while a stereo gives you an overall feel. They do different arrangements for songs, sometimes this can be between two different live performances, but most often you notice a difference between the studio, live, and acoustic version. The live versions defs pull more to their origins of pop-punk while the studio version plays with production - different instrument and a few additional voices from people that aren’t in the band. Recently they've been playing more with backing tracks during their performances which is cool, there’s just so many different ways to perform a single song and its so intriguing how it can change the feel to a song. 

I already mentioned this with Youngblood, but if we look at Lie to me and Valentine. 

Lie to me: studio version < Live <  On The Record (Apple Music) acoustic version < Instagram live acoustic version (this just had a guitar vs the apple music where there were more instruments) < the small snippets of Luke performing Lie to Me on the piano (on the record and ig story). 

Part of this is me being stubborn because for some reason I thought the studio version of lie to me would be on the piano (even though in hindsight, it doesn't make sense because they didn’t use during the live version, but I think I also mixed it up with Luke saying many of the songs originate from the piano). The piano brings a different feel to the song. And I’m a sucker for slow ballads. I still love the studio version of lie to me, it is really cool how they mix a melancholy instrument with sad lyrics (I just want my basic self to live). I find the piano version more heartbreaking. 

I was drawn to Lie to me immediately. I think some of that is because lyrically it is similar to my second favorite Taylor Swift song come back…be here. But also the lyrics just tug at your heartstrings. I think this song will actually end up lowering in my future rankings, I’ll still be the #1 piano lie to me stan but I think lie to me isn’t something I’ll replay as often as ghost of you because it requires a certain mood to appreciate it.

Valentine is so weird and it took me a while to appreciate.I had listened to the live version countless times, then I listened to the leak, sometime during that song I realized that the song was sexy???? I was so confused. Going back to Taylor Swift she has a song called the moment I knew and for the longest time, the reason I wasn’t a big fan of the song because the word Happy Birthday made me cringe, basically the entire chorus to Valentine did that to me. But with repetition, I was able to get over that. It’s still a strange song lol. I think it’ll be higher than some other songs in other categories just because the song has grown on me, but it might later shift who knows. 

Talk fast and Moving Along keep going back and forth

When it was just the live versions I listened to Talk Fast the least out of the 4 non-studio only songs. Last week when I started to make a post like this but gave up because I fell asleep I ranked Talk fast higher. Talk Fast is defs more basic and the lyrics at the beginning of moving along were similar to Valentine where I was like....ummm. But I think that is now what is the appeal to moving along, it is a song that stands out, the lyrics are fun (they’re so weird)... it’s a nice contradiction where they know they’re being irrational but it’s like in the first verse their drunk self is confessing things. The drums and the bass in this song is killer, there's a weird but really cool moan?? that says awww in the background. If you’re not doing the drum bit during the transitions in and out and during the chorus you are doing it wrong.

--

Ok so now, where do want you back and youngblood fit into that ranking?

I am going to squeeze both songs in-between moving along and talk fast. I think talk fast is a bit basic (a safe song) and these songs are more complex instrumentally. 

Top Ranked Songs

This is the most difficult part because these songs KILL ME. They also have a different feel to them which makes them more difficult.

Ghost of you is my #1 (am I bold enough to stay that right now, is it premature). This song is nostalgic, it makes me think of something that would be played in an early 2000′s movie. I LOVE BALLADS. It makes me want to scream and cry at the same time. The lyrics…are heartbreaking, and the different stories can be associated with the song. Surprisingly the bridge is my favorite part of this song (not surprising because my fav part of most songs are bridges, surprising because the lyrics are so simple)

Monster Among Men - a whole different spectrum is FUN. My favorite parts are the counting and the oh no’s lol. Deep. The Drum. Luke calling himself an Asshole. This song compliments Better Man well, there are some stupid things that he’s done and he admits he’s not the perfect person, but he also admits that he has a dark passenger that he sometimes lets run ship. I like the honesty in this song. Rather than the girl making him a better man this song is about him trying to be better than a past self, trying to be better than the other jerks out there. And I think that speaks volumes compared to just having someone else who makes you want to change because of them. This song focusing more on self-motivation (they’re two similar, but different concepts).

Babylon. I don’t even know what to say about this song, but it’s brilliant. THEY DID THAT. The title, the music, the lyrics are all well integrated, the metaphor of a relationship to Babylon. It’s an intensified version of talk fast (and more mutual). They’re going to have this intense relationship but it’s going to end in burning flames. The lyrics are brilliant, not weird lol, but very original (*cough* verse two)  (Rip I’m trying to explain my reasoning as much as possible but I’m doing a bad job). 

If Walls Could Talk - aka a completely different feel from Babylon. It makes me want to get lost in the moment, lost in the music, in the middle of a dance floor. And thus why “I love your hair in your face” is one of my fav lyrics. This song is so vulnerable. Think about your bedroom and all of the different things you’ve gone through in that room. They know you’re everything, it goes beyond sex, it goes to crying, frustration, the best and worse versions of yourself. Oh and I forgot, Ashton’s part!!!!!

While I haven’t disclosed my ranking yet, I am surprised to say that Babylon has surpassed More, aka one of my initial stands out, I believe this is because of the complexity featured in all aspects of Babylon (you’ll be surprised what goes above Babylon though lol). Like I mentioned at the beginning of this section, my fav songs are the hardest ones to rank because they’re all just so good. It just sounds so good, the shakers, the beat is so good, this song goes hard while the vocals are soft, I love the instrumental contrast of the chorus and then it builds again. This song is relatable and reminds me of times when I was depressed. It’s a reminder that material items can only fill a small void, but in the end what we all want, what we all need is an emotional connection with another human, to have meaning in the different things that we do. 

Ranking -

Ghost of You

If Walls Could Talk

Monster Among Men

Babylon

More

Lower Ranked Songs

When splitting the songs into categories it was easier to do favs first, but for the actual ranking I did this part first, but I didn’t want to change the order but just know I wrote this part out before the section above. 

I am basing this off of first impressions. I wasn’t blown away by the target deluxe songs when I first heard them, they still made me smile like crazy but they’re not as good quality as rest of the album. And then the first time I listened to the album Woke up in Japan and empty wallets were good they just weren’t standouts compared to rest of the album.

Best Friend is at the bottom, I feel so bad because I feel like it’s an attack on Ashton, I love him with my heart but this song you really have to be in the right mood. When you are you’ll be looking stupid with a smile plastered on your face. It has a doo wop feel to it (is too lazy to grab the cd insert to figure out what instrument is creating that sound). But if you're not feeling it its kinda a strange song lol, achoo. 

It’s interesting listening to when you walk away now compared to the first 24 hours after I got the target edition because it SCREAMS Reggae (heavy bass influence). But now that I listen to it, it is actually one of their safer songs?? This song is another fun song, but I’m more into the feel. I like the contrast between this song and if you don’t know. Lyrically I 100% relate to this song when I think about some old friends of mine..

My love for Japan, unfortunately, won’t make this Woke Up in Japan rank any higher. Luke’s vocals KILL this song. My favorite parts of this song are the first verse, specifically the phrase:  neon weekend and the entirety of the prechorus (and don’t forget about the musical transition into this part). I feel like this song is also kinda safe, the touch on a complex psychological situation but they keep it open-ended, and lyrically I might’ve liked it even more if they took the extra step.

Empty Wallets, this one grew on me fast, defs my favorite out of the four. I think for these songs the ranking focuses on my favoritism towards the overall sonic feel. Especially for this song because maybe I’ve been on the internet too much but this gives me slight sugar daddy vibes and I’m not into that, lyrically I like the song relating more to friends and going out traveling, going to concerts, and not preventing yourself from living just because you don’t have that much money. This song positively stands out the most out of the four, sonically I LOVE “Sugar-coated brain/The fluid ain't to blame/For the sugar-coated pain” and the bridge. 

As I was going through this I realized I was talking about them in reverse order, so he ranking is as follows

Empty Wallets

Woke Up in Japan

When You Walk Away

Best Friend

4. Middle Ranked Songs

Midnight is probably going to end up lower than a song in the lower ranked category. The reason I initially put it in this category is that I liked the song off the bat, while I had hesitations towards the target songs after listening to them. BUT it’s probs the most basic song out of all of them. It’s so basic, it doesn’ sound like them. This song makes me think of where you in the morning by Shawn Mendes (this song isn’t basic though just so we're clear). It’s refreshing because we peg men as the only people like this, only ever wanting a one night stand, but sometimes/there are men who want more even if it originated from a one night stand. While Midnight focuses more on a ‘friends with benefits’ situation or someone they commonly call upon for a hookup. This song is sonically pleasing, but like I said it's not as original as other songs. Lyrically there’s desire that’s not reciprocated, which is… sad. I really like the lyrics of this song. 

Better Man is cute, but I struggle with it ever since I made the Ed Sheeran connection, it can be very distracting. Also now that I’ve made the comparison to monster among men... idk. hmmm.

Why Won’t You Love Me. #1 out of this category. The lyrics are very visual. I love the whyyyy whyyy’s at the beginning and the “why won’t you love me are fun to sing.” It’s a piano-based song, can you tell what instrument I have a preference for? This song tells a story which captivates the listener. Oh also, I like that Calum, luke, and Michael all feature on this song. I’m a sucker for layered (?parts??), which they do during the bridge, where the why won’t you love me is subtly playing in the background while they sing over it. 

Meet You There this song should really stand out more considering it pushes the boundaries instrumentally the most. It has a good beat drop, lo lo lo lo love good stuff. Lyrically my favorite part is “When it's physical, I can't keep track of days/But the emotional is more than we can take” and vocally my favorite part is “I'm just waiting for, waiting for you.” The drums during Michael's part and then the piano before the beat drops again. Wow. 

Ranking - 

Why Won’t You Love Me

Meet You There

Midnight

Better Man

Final Ranking 

Ghost of You

If Walls Could Talk

Monster Among Men

Lie To Me

Babylon

More

Why Won’t You Love Me

Moving Along

Youngblood

Want You Back

Talk Fast

Empty Wallets

Meet You There

Woke Up in Japan (this is so close to when you walk away)

When You Walk Away

Valentine

Midnight (I feel like this automatically gets ranked lower bc I don’t have this song in my library)

Best Friend

Better Man (I like this song better than these last few but I just can’t get past the Ed Sheeran comparison atm) (it probs goes after woke up in Japan) (to uplift this song, something that I didn’t mention before is I like the part where they sing a ‘betta’ ‘betta’ man)

Again this is difficult because some songs I like better lyrically and others sonically, for the most part, I am choosing my final ranking based which songs I would play over others. The bottom of the list has more specific, and different reasons why they’re at the bottom. 

Album Review/Ranking Masterlist

[musicallyy-inclined]

2017 Year-End Ranked (80-71)

Ah, I’ve been so busy that I’m just getting another set up. This is going to be the worst set both because I really wanted to get it posted and because we are squarely in the part of the list where I have no real feelings about these songs. So yeah, this set and part of the next one are going to be a little lackluster, but don’t worry, once we get to top 60, things will start falling into place and I will have a lot more opinions!

80. Both – Gucci Mane ft. Drake

and

79. Fake Love – Drake

I really need to just get through this set and these are (I think) the last Drake songs on this list so I wanted to talk about how Drake has affected hip-hop on the whole. Which I don't know a ton about but I do know that since Drake kind of took over the rap world in 2015-2016, it seems like rap had gotten a lot more boring as whole. I'm not sure if this is entirely true, but I don't like Drake regardless of whether it is or not. So yeah, out of these two songs, Fake Love seems to be getting more hate because of Drake being whiny, which I guess is fair but I just couldn't be bothered with it. And I don't think I've ever fully heard Both, but by the snippets I've heard it seems like just as much of a non-factor. So yeah, Drake sucks.

78. Everyday We Lit – YFN Lucci ft. PnB Rock

Generic party song #10000000. This is probably going to be my laziest write-up because I don't feel like listening through this right now. But yeah, this is mostly funny because it uses the word lit which cracks me up for whatever reason. And yeah, I got nothing else.

77. Rolex – Ayo & Teo

Apparently this is popular because of a internet challenge, which shows how much I know about the internet anymore because I had no idea lol. But this song is at least a little bit more upbeat, even though it sounds really poorly produced. I guess you can't have both an upbeat song and good production  in hip-hop this year (or can you? Stay tuned). Also, this mentions Teletubbies, so that's fun.

76. Hurricane – Luke Combs

Oh look, it's finally more country! I think there are 5 “country” songs on this list, and I tried to spread them pretty evenly throughout. And so this song lands here. I don't have a ton to say about it, it just seems like generic country love song to me, and that type of song usually bores me. But the Hurricane metaphor is nice.

75. Don't Wanna Know – Maroon 5 ft. Kendrick Lamar

Honestly, have Maroon 5 been replaced by robots? I've never been their biggest fan, but I did like some songs of theirs from their past two albums. But yeah, they have stopped trying completely and although this isn't the worst offender, it is the first. The only redeeming factor in this song is that the beat is actually not awful. Yeah, it's typical trop pop, but I kind of like that genre. The noise at the beginning is stupid though. Oh, and Kendrick Lamar sounds pretty good and makes the song at least marginally better. But Adam Levine is completely checked out yet again. And the lyrics have a slightly unsettling quality to them. Possessive songs like this irritate me a lot. And yeah, I never hated this song, but it was always just there.

74. XO TOUR Llif3 – Lil Uzi Vert

I think that music critics and listeners as a whole can be spilt into two groups: those who get this song, and those who don't. And I definitely fall into the latter category. I think that where this song really fails is in it's mood and content, because it can't decide what kind of a song it wants to be. It's a confusing mix of bragging and depressive lyrics, and can't figure what the point is. Oh, and Lil Uzi Vert can't sing, or rap or whatever he's trying to do.  And if he could, I don't believe him at all. Even in the video, he seems too goofy to deliver a song like this. It's funny that the Weeknd is in the video too, because I'd totally buy this from him. But yeah, this sounds awful and is a confusing mess which is only this high because the hook is kind of catchy.

73. Rockstar – Post Malone ft. 21 Savage

I am so conflicted about this song. It sounds fine and the lyrics weren't just more hedonistic bragging and had some personality and individuality, I might actually have it much higher and I do like the hazy feel the instrumentation has to it. But yeah, the lyrics suck and don't match the beat at all, so it kind of just sounds like a lazy mess. Once again, Post Malone is not believable in the least. Honestly, the popularity of this song came out of nowhere for me, that's how irrelevant I though Post Malone was. Oh, and this blocked Havana from #1, so it can go rot in a ditch as far as I am concerned.

72. I Get The Bag – Gucci Mane ft. Migos

We are getting to the part of the chart with rap songs that I actually kind of enjoy now. I really do like the flow of this songs and especially the hook that Quavo does. The content isn't any different than any of the other Migos songs on this list though, and that's why it's ending up here. But overall, not a bad song, still don't have a lot to say about it. .

71.Young Dumb & Broke – Khaild

This song is pretty okay I guess. It's just boring and repetitive. The lyrics are harmless enough, but like the fact that they directly reference high school kind of turns me off on them a bit. Just because I never really want to revisit high school again. I'm not a huge fan of Khalid's voice either, so there's that. BUT, Normani Kordei is in the video and that alone gave this song like 10 extra spots.

[ificouldflytotheclouds]

Youngblood Album First Impressions

These are my initial thought after listening to the album for the first time.

Youngblood

I was at work when the studio version of this song first dropped, I was standing in the foyer as I waited for campus transportation to arrive. I was familiar with the song because I had listened to live recordings to prepare me for my concert, which at the time was three days away. My jaw dropped. The live version was good, but the studio version was a killer. This song is a  deserves to be danced to, HARD. In concert, I don’t feel like this song goes as hard, and for that reason, I prefer the studio version. It’s funny because I thought this song went hard, I WAS NOT PREPARED. 

I think this was an excellent title track and song to start the album. It encapsulates the feel of the entire album from the production, singing, and the lyrics. 

Favorite Lyrics:

“Surrender my everything/'Cause you made me believe you're mine“

This line is so vulnerable and it tugs at my heartstrings.

“When you looking at those strangers/Hope to God you see my face”

I am a sucker for these lyrics after making eye contact with Luke during the concert, but I also relate this to the crush that at had at the time, and the friends that are no longer friends.

Want You Back

When I first listened to  this song I was like wHo iS tHiS bAnD?? I think this was a good lead single (had they known the success of youngblood that might’ve been better, but it might not have gotten as popular if it came out of nowhere) to introduce the new song. Compared to rest of the album this song is fairly tame, I’ve listened to it so many times that ofc this is 5sos. I just wow I’m so proud of them (imma try not to write this through the entire post bc thats basically what I did on twitter all night)

Favorite Lyrics:

Is it tears or just the fucking rain? (who am I liking explicit lines, I am a changed woman)

And the way that I used to make you laugh/'Cause you know every morning I wake up/Yeah, I still reach for you/I remember the roses on your shirt/When you told me this would never work

Lie to Me

Out of the non-singles performed on tour (+valentine, talk fast, moving along), this one is my favorite. I fell in love with it instantly. It makes me think of Come Back… Be Here which is my second favorite Taylor Swift song. Ngl, hearing the studio version was a tad disappointing because I was hoping that there would be piano in the song, even though why would there be? Lol. It’s not like there was piano in the live version. Listening to the studio version made me understand the boys when they talk about the contrast the sad lyrics with the happy beachy vibe instrumental. I still LOVE this song, it was just a bit of a shock because I had unrealistic expectations for the studio version (I think I was thinking closer to Ghost of You vibes), regardless, I will request they release a piano cover of the song. The short clips of Luke on the piano is not enough. The harmonies in this song are so good and my hear hurts over the lyrics. 

There is violin in this song and that needs to be appreciated. There’s also a certain sound at the end of the chorus that sounds like something else but I can’t remember what.

Favorite Lyrics:

And I caught you looking too, but you didn't look twice

Valentine

This song took me a while to get into. 1) The rhythm is very different from anything else I have heard by them 2) The word choices in the chorus, there are some words that automatically turn me off of songs they just sound cringy to me. After listening to the song enough I have gotten us to it and enjoy the song.

I don’t know why it took me so long to realize, well I do, it’s because I had to get used to the lyrics, but this song is HOT. Another good song to perform on tour to introduce how SEXY this album is, literally. It’s funny because I normally am not a fan of albums when they’re too sexual but I am so in love with this album and they also address the topic in a classy, normalizing way, that doesn’t just focus on being horny, there’s an additional psychological dimension within their song.

Favorite Lyrics:

We know we're classic together like Egyptian gold/We love us

Talk Fast

This was the only song they sang on the tour that I hadn’t heard the studio version, my jaw was on the floor (I mean it was for most songs but lol). This was my second favorite non-single song they performed on tour, it has a fun ‘80′s inspired feel. The bass (and the drums) stand out in this song. 

Favorite Lyrics:

Leave all of your indecisions with you at home/Don't see you're doing me a favor

lol me. 

God dammit we look good together

Moving Along

This song also took me a little while to get into, besides the beat, I think it has to do with the more talk quality of the song. And again, the interesting lyrics. But now you see me bopping. I feel like they chose very unique songs to perform on tour and I appreciate that it also gave me the time to love them, so now I can properly enjoy them now that the album is out. 

Favorite Lyrics:

For this song, my favorite lyrics has to do more with what part of the song is the most fun to sing along to.

I know I’m the stupid one who ended it/And now I'm the stupid one regretting it

I've been thinking about you lots, lately/Or are you moving along?

If Walls Could Talk

This is the first new song that I heard and it was so exciting. From the first listen I knew that this is going to be one of my favorite songs. Which makes me scream because this is a straight sex song. This song just makes me smile and makes me want to dance. 

This is the first song that Ashton has a proper feature and it makes me so happy :) I love the drums and the piano in this song. Michael’s guitar part during most of the song brings a lightness during the song but then during the bridge it brings the gritty, we're getting down and dirty aspect to the song. 

-Disclaimer- I will not talk about bass enough through this post bc I do not have the best ear for bass, I am just not as familiar with the instrument. I can tell in some songs, but in others, I have to listen very closely but even then I don’t necessarily hear it (I mean I’m pretty sure Cal will be playing the piano in this song so... it makes sense)

Favorite Lyrics:

Bodies are hoping to get addicted to sound

I love this line. This is a song that makes you want to put your head back, dance and get lost in the music. It is a perfect representation of the song. 

If these walls could talk, I'd hope they wouldn't say anything/Because they've seen way too many things

This lines really brings perspective. I find this song to be very vulnerable. The line is saying that it’s seen everything you’ve done within these walls, the sex, the desire, but also you break down crying, the look of falling in love, anger, and frustration as you hit the wall… The walls know your everything.

Better Man

Another Taylor Swift reference? Lol. But actually, this song reminds me of Ed Sheeran. I even feel like how it’s sung gives me ed vibes, the guitar, down to the mhhh. 

This song is so cute. 

Favorite Lyrics:

New friends again and again, gone when the morning comes/Demons I try to defend, but I couldn't get enough

This line stood out right away it was sad and relatable. 

Wrapped in your arms, I swear I'd die for you

im not emo.

More 

Another fav. This song goes so hard. It reminds me a little bit of ONE OK ROCK. There is a heavy guitar part, Ashton kills the drums at the end, and there's a shaker?? in this song too.

I mean... this is about Luke. It can easily apply to the other boys, but there’s a reason why this is a Luke dominate album. 

Favorite Lyrics:

Enemy lines are drawn, lines are drawn

I love how Calum sings this line

I like a lot of lines in the album, the first verse is a standout, idk, this is a very sad relatable song.

Why Won’t You Love Me

Lol the first few seconds makes me think of Chole by Emblem3 

This was the first song where I was still and entranced while listening to it. This is a very cinematic song, which is very beautiful but also makes me think of someone (cough cough) staring out a rainy window.

While I have never been in a relationship I can relate to this song, specifically to friendship. Sometimes people change or need something better even if nothing actually went wrong. I think this is something important to remember with any relationship, sometimes “It’s not you, it’s me” is as true as it gets. 

The ooh at the end is cute. 

Favorite Lyrics:

You say you can't wait and need to make a change

I check my phone to see your face/Staring back as if to say/Don't worry, you won't be lonely

Woke Up In Japan

I can’t help but think about my time in Japan while I listen to this (Even though I am actually visualizing China bc we were in a hotel for a short time, while the dorm we were in Japan was more like an apartment). This song is good, they lyrics standout the most, but it defs doesn’t stand out as much as other songs. It’s an interesting contradiction that I am trying to wrap my head around. It’s all over the place. The song is about amazing sex, the ecstasy of a night out while being in a bad mental place in another country. (even though japans probs metaphorical in this context)

Favorite Lyrics:

It was more than just a neon weekend

Empty Wallets

This is another song that does stand out too much but it’s still GOOD.

Favorite Lyrics:

Dancing on empty wallets

I love the visual 

Shoulda caught a break/The fluid ain't to blame/For the sugar causing pain

Ghost of You

I’m not dying, I am already dead. This song pulls at my heartstrings so much. I can’t. It also reminds me of songs that they play in ‘00 movies which makes me emo (closest I can think of I’ll be, but that’s not exactly the feel I’m going for).

This is a masterpiece. 

Favorite Lyrics:

The verses. I can’t pick. 

Monster Among Men

Michael starting of the song. Yes.  This song is funky and fun. I really enjoy the instrumental arrangement in this song, Ashton’s drumming goes hard, mikey’s guitar solo, cal on the piano. It’s amazing. This isn’t my #1 but it’s defs up there (as with the next to songs)

Favorite Lyrics:

one, two, three, four 

I love how this switches with the beat. The oh no’s in this song also go hard.

it's time for me to admit/That I'm an asshole, so here I go

boy…wyd? At least you’re being honest. 

Meet You There

The chorus, the beat drop. YESSSS. I also love the attitude of whatever will be will be, the universe will choose our destiny.

Favorite Lyrics:

I would break in bed, if you wanted me to

I. AM. SCREAMING.

Babylon

Calum F it up. The intro to this song. I had heard that a song sounded like FOB, my friend made the direct reference last night, but not until this morning have I finally been able to hear it. Sounds similar to centuries which is one of FOB’s best songs (that I’ve heard).

Favorite Lyrics:

The entire second verse 

I'm tired of the feud, your short fuse, my half-truths are not amused/I wish we had a clue to start new, a white moon, no residue/The color of our mood is so rude, a cold June, we're not immune/But if we're way too faded to fight, you can stay one more night.

And there we have it, folks. I am so incredibly proud of these boys. This album was life-changing for them, their excitement feed off to us, and it followed through. I don’t think I’ve enjoyed an album so much since Made in the AM and that was back in 2015. Well, this will all I will be talking about for a long time. So I am sorry in advance. 

Ranking to hopefully come later in the week.

Album Review/Ranking Masterlist