#to be honest my brain checked out about an hour ago and I don't know if I know what I wrote
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lilithandherharlots · 1 year ago
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Too shy to tell you
miguel o’hara x fem!reader
Miguel hides your heals in hopes of making you forget you ever owned a pair...he confesses about his theft during a hot and heavy night of sex.
Warnings: This might be interpreted as possessive or an unhealthy bond. Though its supposed to be just a very shy and respectful Miguel who let's loose during sex.:]
Authors note: I am not a writer!! This is my first time righting fanfic.. like.. ever!!! So don't attack me. Though honest, constructive criticism is something that I would love to hear. Sorry if there are spelling mistakes. Also, I don't know how to put proper description..... enjoy!!!!
:::
"Miggy?" I call out to my boyfriend who's currently towering over the coffee machine, waiting for it to brew.
"Yes, my love?" He responds with a look over his shoulder.
"Have you seen my black pointed heals? I can't seem to find them."
"No. Have you checked by the door?" He was lying.
He was lying. He was lying, and he didn't feel bad about it. The truth was he had stuffed them in the highest cupboard of the laundry room. He knew you couldn't reach it. He liked it that way. He couldn't let you open it since he had stuffed at least 4 pairs of heals in there.
"No miggy, they aren't here." You say after checking everywhere by the front door.
"Idk what to say, baby... we have to leave soon. Just throw on a different pair and I'll buy you some new ones later."
He was a liar... and he was damn good at it... until he wasn't.
:::
It was 2am. This insanity started hours ago, but Miguel's stamina wouldn't let down. Your soft moans could fuel him till sun rise, and he would love to do this forever. But unlike him, you have limits. Limits to your ability to stay strong, or at least keep yourself up right. But he doesn't really care. Your begs for a break won't succeed with a constantly starving man like him.
"One more round, please baby... please. I need you." His desperate begs caress your tear stained cheeks as he whispers them softly, leaning over you and filling you with sloppy thrust.
"Miguel- please.. It's too much.." You whine as you try to pull away, gripping desperately onto the sheets.
"Last one.... I promise..." he lies.
He said the same thing the last 4 rounds. If he could have it his way he'd continue. But he knew you couldn't keep going for much longer, so he used this opportunity to tell you what he couldn't bring himself to say otherwise.
"I lied..." he confesses. Watching your tits bounce with every rough trust, keeping himself busy while you tried to form a reply. It took you a while, but you managed to let out a soft hum, waiting for him to explain himself further.
"I took them. Your heels.. I fucking hate those things.." he thrust get faster as he says it. Hoping to make your brain foggy enough to not remember his confessions in the morning.
"I like your height, so why do you wear those weird things?" His heart felt lighter as he told you.
"I like that your height forces you to get on your tippy toes every time you want a kiss from me.. and even then, I have to bend over to reach you.... I like that you rely on me to reach those high shelves. Every time you ask me, you grow as red as a rose...."
You can feel his movements speed up. You can barely hear him... your mind fuzzy from pleasure. Lewd sounds of skin slapping against skin felt like white noise at this point. The dim shadow of his frame covering you completely.
"You're so small under me.. your body falls any way I bend it..." At his point, he was just speaking the first thing to cross his mind.
You didn't hear him, and he knew it. Seconds later, you feel his weight shift, the mattress by your head sinking under his heavy hand as he leaned in and whispered.
"Please don't take that away from me."
His words were demanding. He felt exactly what he said. Even though your eyes were shut tight, you knew his eyes were locked on you. His breath heavy, as if he just confessed a dirty secret. He kinda did...
"Promise me.... Promise me you won't wear them and I'll help you cum."
As tired as you were. You wanted it. You needed it. You needed him. So you give in.
"F-fine... I promise."
"You promise what?" He smirked hearing your whiney voice.
"I promise I won't wear the heels!!"
The pleasure he got from you saying that was immense. He shifted his weight once more as he changed your position like a marionette doll. Spreading your legs apart. His hands wrapped around your thighs, and his claws dug into your skin. The stinging pain of it was a wake-up call, causing you to gasp for air.
This position caused him to go deeper. The sticky mess from your previous rounds was being pushed out of your aching hole. The sound of his hips hitting your ass grew louder with every precise thrust. They got louder and louder until they stopped. Your thighs had clenched closed as you hit that high you were chasing. And you took him with you. Tightening around his pulsing cock in a way that made him fill you to the brim once more.
He watched your body shake. Your hips jerking forward. He would usually take that as his sign to keep going, but your fucked out face was telling him you couldn't take another thrust.
"You did great my love..... my little angel~" He cooed gentle praises as he rubbed your claw marked thighs.
"I'll buy you the cutest flats."
:::
A thing he didn't know.. is that you lied, too. His secret cupboard was emptied, and your heal collection was restored... and yes.. he pouted in silence.
The end
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sgtmickeyslaughter · 7 months ago
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✨Tag Game Wednesday ✨
hi @energievie and @jrooc
Name: gigi
What is the most listened to artist in your music app of choice this month? chappell roan yall already knew
What song do you know all the lyrics to? A lot of songs honestly, i use songs to memorize things bc anything set to music embeds itself so deep in my brain - but my go to dark horse karaoke song is
What song do you pretend to know all the lyrics to and sing along to even though you don't?
bc its so catchy but i do not speak german but boy do i think i can when this comes on
or anything from kate bush bc i love her but idk what the hell she’s saying
If you were to be crowned Queen/King/Royalty of listening to a band or artist, who would that be? 
honestly this one is too tough, however if it was still 2016 the answer would unequivocally be lana del rey and i don’t want to hear a thing about it
What band/artist surprises you the most on your frequently listened to artists?
sometimes when i write or work i listen to hours and hours of lofi playlists so whenever a song from that sneaks on to my spotify stats im always very confused
Favourite line from a song (or one you have been thinking about lately?
I think these lyrics are very clever and poignant
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Guilty pleasure band or song?
college drop out/ graduation and grimes 😬 i don’t think i listen to any bad/cringe music but some artists are pretty shit people
Okay let's talk fandom music:
Fave band or song you've discovered from a Fan Fic?
years and years and years ago i listened to sufjan stevens for the first time bc of a destiel fic
Fave Fanfic Playlist?
I’ll be honest i can’t really think of one, but i have one for myself since all my fics are named after songs, its linked here but hopefully it will grow a little
Fave Gallavich song?
pink and white was insane work for the prison reunion scene but at last brought the wedding to another level of grace and i loved that pick
Do you listen to music recommended by the writer or an included playlist?
sometimes! i try really really hard to but it’s difficult to travel to a secondary internet location for a fic playlist
What song do you think is Gallavich coded?
*sigh*
What’s a bop you want to share with your mutuals today? 
I listen to a lot of older gen hip hop on my ride home from work bc it helps me feel relaxed so i’ll leave you with that
i was also tagged for the 5 songs from your favorite playlists game, so ill drop those as well
and the last one is bam bam by sister nancy but tumblr has an audio limit
tagging @iansw0rld @lingy910y @creepkinginc @doshiart @mmmichyyy @mickeym4ndy @em-harlsnow @mickittotheman @mickeysgaymom @softmick @spookygingerr @atthedugouts @deathclassic @solitarycreaturesthey @hazeisblue @blue-disco-lights @metalheadmickey
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call-sign-jinx · 2 years ago
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Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw - I’m here honey
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Summary - Bradley Bradshaw pisses you off to your limit. You lose it with him because of stuff going on back home and end up in his arms.
Warnings - swearing, fluff, making out
A/N - the reader has a manchester accent xoxo
bradley "rooster" bradshaw x fem!reader
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Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw. Where do I even begin?
Well, why don't I start off with, he is a cocky arrogant mother fucker. God he makes me want to claw my eyes out everyone time he flirts with a girl. I mean, what do they even see in him? Sure, he's fit n all. But he's just an arrogant prick that thinks he can get what he wants.
He just writhes in it. He loves it. He's just a twat overall to be honest. and he knows just how to get under my skin. Like right now.
Me and the Dagger Squad are at the Hard Deck, and oh my fucking days, he's just showing off as much as he can. And everyone knows how much I don't like pricks like him. People who show off just for attention. Like, why? To some dumb fuckers he's amazing, but to everyone else, he's just a douchebag.
"Hey! Bradshaw!" Hangman shouted across the room to Rooster who just so happened to be chatting up some blonde bird who probably didn't even have enough brain cells to know that he just wanted a shag tonight. "Come have a round of darts with me Rooster!"
Bradshaw bid farewell to the clueless girl and sauntered over to the rest of the Dagger Squad. He gave me an obnoxious wink which earned an eyeroll from me. Phoenix saw then walked over to sit on the stool next to me.
"You know he just wants a reaction from you? He loves the attention and you know it." I rolled my eyes with a smirk. She gave me a knowing look.
"Yeah, I know. But he just aggravates me tha much tha I can't do much bout it. It's jus automatic now init?" Phoenix laughed at my words. Probably cause of my accent. She loves it so much.
"Then try not to give him a reaction. Like every time he says something stupid or that you don't like. Shut your eyes, take a deep breath, and ignore it." Her advice was actually really good. But not for me.
"Easier said than done Nat. I've just grown up to react to every little thing that happens. Probably the household I were raised in." She patted my shoulder and chuckled a bit.
"I think I'm gonna go outside for a sec. For a toot." A toot means vape. I literally had to explain this about 10,000 times to Phoenix.
She chuckles then gestures to the door. I then walked outside to sit on the bench and got my vape out of my pocket. I took a drag then turned on my phone to reply to my little sister's message that I should have answered hours ago. She was texting me, updating me about how our Nana was back in England. She got diagnosed with cancer a few months ago then started chemo a week after. It's been draining for everyone. And I can't even go to see her because I live so fucking far away.
When I opened the text, my heart dropped and my whole body had gone numb.
she's gone Y/N/N, ik u can't come rn cos ur on duty n everything but i jus thought u needed to know. come as soon as u want xxxxxx
I just sat there. Numb. Frozen. No emotion. No sadness. Nothing. Nada. Absolutely fuck all. I couldn't think straight. Why didn't I at least go see her once? I didn't even get to say goodbye to her. Didn't get to tell her I got into Top Gun which has, well had, always been her dream for me. She wanted me to do it to prove all them dumb ass men that a woman could do what they do but better.
And now, she'll never know. She probably hated me before she died cause I didn't visit her. What if she was upset about it? What if she thought I forgot about her? What if she thought that I stopped caring about her? So many thoughts were running through my head. Different things being said in my head. But they all went quiet when I saw Phoenix walk through the door to outside. Probably to come check on me, God knows how long I've just been sat there staring at my phone. At the text.
"Hey Y/C/S, you okay?" She had a trace of worry laced in her voice and expression. I gave her a tight-lipped smile and nodded.
"I'm great thank you." I faked a happy smile as I got up and gestured for her to follow me back into the Hard Deck.
-------------------------------------------
It's been about a week since I got the text from Y/L/S/N. I haven't even reacted how someone would normally react to their family member dying. I didn't even reply back to Y/L/S/N. Just left her on opened.
I just acted like everything was okay. No one seemed to notice except one person. Bradshaw. I could tell by the way he looks at me that he knows something is wrong. But he hasn't asked.
Also, I found out I won't be able to make it to the funeral. Which is great. I'll just say my goodbyes another time. Hopefully Nana will understand. She always did.
Right now, we're having a briefing for the day. Which consists of absolutely fuck all, no flying, just some theory work we need to get done apparently.
I came in late so I sadly had to sit next to Bradshaw whose been looking at me like I'm an idiot for the past week. And it's actually quite unnerving.
After the briefing finished, I went straight to the unisex bathrooms to wash my face and clear my head for at least a few minutes. That was until I heard the door open. I looked to the source of the sound to see Bradshaw. Great. Why does he always come near me at the worst times? It's like he has a sixth sense about this shit.
"Hey Y/C/S, are you okay? You seem a bit off." He had worry and concern plastered on his face and in his voice. I nodded by head as I looked at the ground.
"Why? Why do you even care? It's not like we're friends or anything? And it's none of your business anyway?" I only glanced up at him for half a second before looking back down. It's tiring playing this whole "I'm happy and nothing's wrong!" facade. It's tiring keeping a smile on my face. Making the same type of jokes as if nothing has happened. Cause something has happened. And I haven't even reacted in the proper, normal way.
"I just wanna know. Cause I've gotta be honest... I'm a little worried about you. Something about you's changed. You seem a little less yourself." I'm sorry, but how the fuck has Rooster, out of everyone I've been around for the past week, noticed but no one else fucking has?
"Nothing is wrong Rooster. And even if there was, why would I talk about it with you? All you do and seem to like doing is piss me off." I finally looked up at him. Annoyance clear on my face.
"I only do that shit because I thought we were both joking around with each other. And I thought we were friends. But I guess I was wrong about that." He looked me dead in the eye then walked out.
I looked back in the mirror and made myself look presentable before going back outside from the toilets.
-------------------------------------------------------
It's now been 2 months after the funeral. I'm a little gutted that I couldn't be there to say goodbye. But obviously I wouldn't have been allowed to go, I'm on duty still and I hadn't even told anyone about it. Not even Phoenix. And it's gonna stay that way for as long as I can make it.
I was in the changing room having a shower. Luckily, I had made it short cause as I got out of the shower I heard someone come into the changing rooms.
It was Bradshaw. Yet again.
"Alright Y/N, I was going to let you tell someone at your own pace but just tell me now. What has gotten you so upset that you're just acting like a robot? And don't give me any of that bullshit 'nothing's wrong and I'm fine' crap because I won't believe you." After he finished I got right back to getting changed. I didn't even acknowledge his chasing after me when I went into a cubicle for some privacy.
As soon as I had gotten out the cubicle to put my shoes on, Bradshaw was standing right outside.
"For fuck sake Bradshaw! Why won't you just leave me alone about it?" I looked him dead in the eye with nothing short of anger. I've been feeling a lot of that lately. And every single time is because of Bradley fucking Bradshaw.
"Because you're acting like someone's fucking died! You're acting all numb and shit!" As soon as he finished his sentence, I finally broke down. After fuck knows how many months of my body not allowing me to even react in a normal way after finding out my Nana had cancer. I had finally broke down.
I dropped to my knees and curled up in a ball as I leaned against the wall. Tear after tear after tear. I couldn't stop. Even if I wanted to.
I looked up at the ceiling until I felt hands on my arms rubbing up and down on them. I looked down and saw Bradshaw, sat on the ground in front of me looking at me dead in the eyes. Something came over me and I just threw myself at him into a hug. He instantly wrapped his arms around me as he tried his best to comfort me.
He was shushing me like I was a crying baby, which I practically was if I'm being honest, and telling me that it's all gonna be okay and that he's here with me. After about 10 minutes of solid crying, I calmed down and looked up at Bradshaw.
We were close. Like very close. Close enough that I could feel his breath fan over my face and see the little hazel specs in his eyes. and all the scars on his cheeks and neck. I scanned his face as he did the same with mine. Then I realised. We were still in each other's embrace. But neither one of us attempted to pull away.
"Thank you Bradley." I said to him with the first genuine, but small, smile I had done in months. As I looked at him more, I realised how gorgeous he actually was. And how much of my type he was.
"No problem sweetheart." That nickname. That fucking nickname shouldn't have affected me the way it did. It made my whole body feel warm. It made blood rise to my cheeks.
In that moment, I don't know what came over me but I quickly pressed my lips against his. But he froze, at first I thought it was just shock but after a few seconds he was still frozen. I quickly pulled away and pulled myself out of his embrace and stood up.
"Fuck. I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry. I don't know why I even did that. By your reaction you didn't like it either." I started to chuckle nervously. Why the fuck did I do that? I've never liked him, not even in a friend way so why the fuck did I choose to do that? I kept on rambling on and on with myself, saying my thoughts out loud for Rooster to hear.
"Y/N." I ignored him and kept on waffling on with myself.
"Y/N." He said a bit more stern at me. I still ignored him and kept talking.
"Y/N!" That finally got my attention. I looked up at him, on the brink of another few tears coming out of my eyes.
"What?" I looked at him softly and looked for any expression other than one that said 'I don't like you, and I didn't like that kiss either so please leave me alone' because that would just make my day worse.
"You shouldn't be sorry. I've wanted to do that ever since we started Top Gun honey. I was just really shocked that you did it because you've never even hinted you liked me. So... could we do that again?" All I did was nod before connecting our lips again.
Bradley wrapped his arms around my waist as I did the same but behind his neck. The kiss was slow, soft. Just the way I liked it. He began to move his hands and caressed the sides of my body. I slid my hands up his neck into his hair and pulled on it slightly, which earned a slight moan from him.
We both pulled away for air. I looked into his eyes and it felt different with him now. Felt nicer. Comfier. He smiled at me as we both came out of the embrace.
“Do you come over to my house? After work?” I asked him as I dipped down to grab my bag. He nodded with a happy smile.
“Yeah, I’d like that. That’s be great Y/N.” I gave Bradley a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek before practically skipping out the changing rooms.
-------------------------------------------------------
After work, I just wanted to drive home, have a shower and go to sleep. I didn’t have any plans anyway, did I? Just to check I looked at my calendar and had nothing. So I just walked back to my car and started to drive home.
As I got to my door, I rummaged through my bag, found my keys, and unlocked the door. I couldn’t even be arsed to have a shower so I flopped onto my couch and lost it again. I began balling my eyes out and shoved my face into my pillow.
I must’ve forgot to lock the door because I heard the door open and quickly sat up, alert. Not knowing who or what just opened my front door. As soon as I saw Bradley turn round the corner, I tried to wipe my tears away without him seeing.
“You okay honey?” I just nodded my head weakly as he came and sat down next to me. I leaned my head on his shoulder as I wrapped my arm around his stomach. He wrapped his around my shoulder and stroked it reassuringly.
“I don’t know why it’s taken me this long to actually react to it.” He looked at me confused with his brows furrowed. Of course he didn’t know, I hadn’t told him and now he probably thinks I’m weird.
“Taken this long for you to react to what?” That’s when the waterworks came back yet again. Why the fuck did they have to start at the slightest mention of my Nana being dead? Gone forever?
“3 months ago my Nana died. I just didn’t react. No crying. No being sad. Nothing. Literally nothing. And then when you said I’m acting like someone died, it flipped a switch. Like it turned my reactions on again. And I- I- I just want her back. I didn’t even get to fucking say goodbye to her Bradley! Imagine that, not being by their side when they’re gone. Let alone being in a whole different fucking country!” I sat up and threw my cushion across the room, angry at myself for not even trying to see her. I guess I didn’t want to. I didn’t want the image of her being up and healthy to go away so I just stayed here. In America.
“Oh honey. It’s not your fault.” I shook my head vigorously. I stood up and looked at his form on the couch.
“But Bradley it is my fault. She had all these plans for me. And when I found out she got cancer, I didn’t even try to go visit her. I didn’t want to. I never made any effort whatsoever.” At that, I dropped to my knees tears coming one after the other.
Bradley was quick to move to hug my and comfort me. “Don’t worry Y/N. I’m here honey. For whatever you need. And it is not your fault. At all. I get why you didn’t want to see her, you didn’t want the image of her being happy and healthy to be replaced by someone that isn’t her but looks like her.” He rubbed my arms then picked me up and sat back on the couch with me on his lap. I tightly hugged him, not wanting to let go in fear of him disappearing.
“Thank you Bradley. Thank you so fucking much. And I’m sorry for being a dick to you.” I apologised profusely as I wiped my tears away and smiled up at him.
He kissed me on my forehead and smiled at me. “Oh honey. It’s alright. And I think I was the dick in this situation. Because all I did was show off to you like a pretentious prick. All because I wanted your attention.” And that’s when it hit me. He wanted my attention.
“W-what?” He chuckled at my confusion.
“I tried to get your attention in every way I could, because the first time I saw you, I just thought ‘wow, she’s fucking gorgeous’ and I couldn’t get you out of my head since.” I looked at him with confusion which then changed to something else that I can’t quite put my finger on.
Instead of replying I just placed my lips on his in a hungry yet soft manner. He quickly reciprocated this and placed his hands on the back of my head to deepen the kiss. After a while it turned into a full blown make out session. Like the ones I used to have back in high school. And probably the same for him.
We both pulled away at the same time, and as I scanned his face, all he did was stare into my eyes with something that looked like love? I don't know, my experience comes from cunts who just wanted a shag so yeah.
"Be my girlfriend." Bradley looked at me with a seriousness I've never seen on his face before. I raised an eyebrow.
"Excuse me?" I gave a questioning look when he shook his head and chuckled to himself.
"I'm sorry- I- I mean, will you be my girlfriend?" He said with the same look in his eyes as before. I pondered on the question until I had my answer.
"Yes, only if you tell and show all them girls that you're now mine." Bradley gave me a cheeky smirk and he lay me down on the couch and placed a chaste kiss on my lips.
"Of course honey. I'd love to do that for you." We both smiled at each other until our lips were connected once again.
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hibewriter · 6 months ago
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Belonephobia
Masterlist   Read it on AO3 Chapter 2
Spiderman: Across the Spiderverse | Migwen | 6.7K | E 
Tags: Non-Con | Kidnapping | Police Butality | P in V Sex | Non-consensual drugging | Breeding kink
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Chapter 1
"Sure you don't wanna stay the night, Gwen? I promise Margo doesn't mind." 
Gwen took one look at Miles, all grown up on practically the other side of the world, and shook her head. She was only going to be at Stanford for two days, and she already wasted the first working up the courage to knock on the door to the off-campus apartment that Miles had gotten with Margo. She had to leave to even hope to get back in time for classes to resume at NYU. Spring Break was no excuse. 
"Nah, I gotta start heading back. My hotel is only two hours away, and then I'm spending the night at Hobie's, so ya know…" She hated the way he looked at her, no longer how he used to. Instead, his eyes were full of concern and disbelief. He'd seen her worn hoodie and torn shoes. He had been at the funeral. 
But he didn't push. 
Just a hug. Another tight-lipped smile as she headed out the door. A wave when she turned back from her car. 
Text me when you get to your hotel. 
She breaks down thirty minutes away from the hostel she booked. A dead end for hikers, runaways, and various other riff-raff with twenty bucks and two feet. Her car pulls to a sputtering stop, slightly off the side of the road. She sees the smoke in the waning light of the surprisingly dusty road, rising from the hood of the rusted bucket she inherited from the Captain. 
She knew she should've gotten it checked before making the cross-country trip. Probably could've afforded the repairs with the leftover cash from her dad's emergency fund. But that would've required thinking before she packed her few belongings into the car and took off. 
She was kind of surprised she made it this far if she was honest. 
She sighs, tugging her phone out of the cup holder she tossed it into. 10% . Another sigh fights its way to the surface, giving her pause as she tries to figure out what to do. A tow truck would take too long, and her phone would never last. Her battery pack is dead, gone from her day of use building her resolve. The road looks…empty. The last building she passed was around forty minutes ago driving in the other direction. 
She worries her lip, staring towards the vagueness of the road ahead. She could try to walk it. Get lost, maybe, and get eaten by wolves or coyotes or whatever they had in the California desert. Or she could stay in the car. Turn it off, lock the doors, and make a makeshift bed out of her duffle in the back seat. She could walk back to that bar in the morning. Call a tow truck and get the fuck out of dodge by nightfall tomorrow if she's lucky. 
She nods, mainly to herself as the plan solidifies in her brain. Rest. Regroup. Tackle the problem. She can do that. 
Her head's barely on the stuffed duffle for more than ten minutes when she hears the soft rapping at her window. She bolts up, squinting against the light shining in her face from the unexpected guest's flashlight. 
Never fully roll down your window to a stranger. Her father's voice rings in her head as she moves to roll the antiquated handle down. Just a crack so she can hear. 
"Ma'am, you can't park here." The voice is deep honey spent, familiar only in its tone. The same tone she’s heard dozens of cops use all her life. She shakes her head, still squinting against the light. Has the sun really set so quickly? Maybe it’s been longer than ten minutes. 
"M' sorry, officer," she mutters, sitting up fully."My car broke down and my phone died. You wouldn't happen to have one I could use, do you?" 
It's silent for a beat, and she holds her breath, hoping he doesn’t ask for any papers. She hadn't quite shifted the plates to her name yet. Or fully renewed her license. But she can swear she hears the beep of his radio. Swears he mutters something about an O'Hara into the receiver. 
"Where are you headed?" he asks, and she wants to ask him to turn the light down. Let her see properly so she doesn't feel so groggy. 
"The Fillmore Hostel down the road." 
Another beep, a mutter of civilian assistance . 
"I'll take you there while my partner comes to collect your car." 
She's never heard of such a procedure in her life. Alarm bells start to ring in her ears, telling her to shrink away from the figure on the other side of the door. She shakes her head, scooting down the seat. "I'd rather stay in my car, if you don't mind." 
The sigh that comes out of him is more akin to a beast, full of disappointment and chiding . As if an unruly child had just demanded candy from him knowing damn well dinner was almost ready. 
"It's not safe out here," he says, clearly on the edge of his patience. "I'm going to have to ask you to come with me." 
Again, she shakes her head, inching away from the door again as he huffs.  
"You just had to make this difficult, didn't you?" 
The next moments happen in a flash. One second, she’s inching to the other side of the car. The next, an entire arm the size of both her legs is shoved through broken glass. A singular hand finds her ankle, ignoring her squirming and yelling as she tries to escape the stranger who found her. His fingers overlap circling her calf, finally finding purchase on her before he yanks . 
She's tugged nearly halfway out of the vehicle. Her nails are ineffective against cloth seats as he pulls her out of the window, tight into his arms. And she shrieks, loud as she can against the futility of the night. It's all she can do before she feels a sharp prick in her neck. In the next second, the world goes black .
__________
It's the clinking of metal against metal that rouses her from the darkness. Not that it's much brighter in the room when she wakes. Or maybe it's the haze in her vision that makes it seem much darker than it is. Her eyes refuse to adjust, the shadows are long and cold as she tries to orient herself.
She's on a cheap mattress. Similar to the worn ones at her sleepaway camps upstate when she felt the longing for home. The room is nothing but concrete slabs, a single bulb illuminating the space – what little there was. 
"You're awake." 
The voice brings no comfort. It's a sugary molasses, slow and sickening as it passes over the burnt embers of his mouth. She tries to move, only to find the pressure on her shoulders refusing to relent. The most she can do is lift her head, despite protest from every cell in her body.
He's on the other side of the room, just out of range of the feeble light. It didn't matter, really. From her limited vantage point, he is a colossus, his frame nearly touching the ceiling of the room. If only she could see a door, but even without the reference she can tell he’s wide. Just his shadow fills the space to the point it feels claustrophobic. As if a shift would fill her past capacity.
"Are you hungry?" 
She reels, brain swimming to process the words. "What?"
"Are you hungry?" he asks again, stepping to the side. He keeps to the wall, just out of full view. "I've heard the effects of the toxin can have adverse effects on the body's digestive system–"
"Wh–what? Toxin?"
"Well, it's more of a paralytic I've been working on. Though I fear I may have given you too much, most don't sleep for eighteen hours."
Eighteen hours. She feels tears welling in a burning sensation against her dry eyes. She was supposed to be headed to Hobie’s apartment right now, letting the desert air flow through freshly cut hair with a new punk record playing over the speakers of her dad’s ‘67 Buick. Instead, she doesn’t even know where she is. 
Her stranger doesn’t appear to be too bothered by her silence. His steps are soft, terrifyingly so as he paces around the room. She hears, rather than sees, his ruffling through cabinets and drawers. Each grind of drawer wheels against metal, the soft closing of a makeshift cupboard as he rummages for food or tools. Maybe he was planning to cut her, take the only thing from her that didn’t hurt, and drag her through the nightmares that plagued her. Maybe he was creating new ones for her to fear. 
“You know, chiquitita ,” he murmurs as if simply discussing plans for the coming weekend. “I didn’t expect you . Si no fuera por el capitán … si no hubiera muerto ese día . You see where things could’ve been different, yes?” 
She huffs, ignoring the pain in her throat as she swallows, wincing at the crack of her voice. “I don’t speak Spanish.” 
Even if she can’t see him, the amusement is evident in his laugh. "Of course, you don't. Why would you? It's not like New York has a large Spanish-speaking community."  
The words seem to swirl in her mind, both far and close as she lies in her cot. He continues to rummage around, noises echoing through the room. New York. Capitán. New York. Capitán. New York. Capitán. The sound of the water running is an accent to the running thoughts in her mind. Still, she can do nothing but groan. There’s something to connect but the pounding in her head refuses to let her. 
“Drink.” Her eyes fly open (when had they closed?) to see the man standing above her. They go wide, staring at his face. 
Capitán. Captain George Stacy. Promoted after his exemplary work in apprehending the leader of the 2099 Crawlers. The same leader was supposed to be rotting in a cell on the other side of the country right now. Instead, he is staring down at her, a bored expression on his face as he holds a small cup to her face. 
She shakes her head, lips pressed together. What is there to describe his face other than disappointment? Suddenly his hand strikes out, slipping between her head and the lumpy mattress. His grip encapsulates her skull, dragging her head upward against her restraints. “Open your mouth or I’ll open it for you.” 
Her hesitation is quickly forgotten as he moves to set the glass down, mouth turning agape in his stranglehold. The corner of his lips upturned, grip renewing on the cup as he proceeds to slowly pour into her waiting mouth.
The water is a fountain after what feels like a month of dehydration. It soothes away the ache of sore flesh, a cooling stream of relief against the effects of her poison. She wants to close her eyes in relief, to savor the feeling, but she can only stare at her captor. Even when he drops her head, letting it fall back into the mattress, she can only stare. Some of the water falls out, splashing over her face and clothes, but she can’t stop tracking his movements. He studies her back, squinting at her in kind. 
“I originally planned to make our dear Georgie suffer,” he states, calm as the sky on a summer afternoon. ���Imagine my disappointment to learn that all that is left of him is you .” 
“What are you going to do to me?” 
“That, chiquita, is up to you.” 
He backs away from her then, unfurling his crouched position back to his full height. She watches as he turns and walks to the far wall. Can do nothing but watch as he moves the rusted metal of the door she hadn’t noticed as if it weighed nothing. Watches as he glances over his shoulder back at her. “When you’re hungry, just say so.” 
__________
By her count, there are exactly three spiders in what she now can recognize as a basement of some sort. One hovers on the wall behind her head, just above the sink and cabinetry. The second moves every three-ish minutes toward the light fixture on the ceiling, occasionally dropping to create more of its web. The third is a track star, running between the various areas of the room as it searches. For what, she’s unsure. Is it food? A comfortable space for it to nest? 
The restraints (metal bars across her chest, stomach, wrists, legs, and ankles) remove themselves after hours ( days?) pass. A whirring sound fills the entire room and blocks out any thought she may have had. But she can finally move. Sitting up seems to be just as much a struggle as keeping her eyes open, but she does it anyway.  Her muscles creak and groan as she stretches; whether they’re stiff from their held positions or the last of the poison in her body, she doesn’t know.
“You have an hour before you need to be lying back on that cot,” his voice rings from the sky. “If I have to put you back myself, we will have a problem.” 
She frowns, finally swinging her legs off the mattress. “What if I have to pee?”
“There is the sink or the drain in the middle of the room.”
She frowns, staring at where she thinks the sound is coming from. He can’t be serious. Nonetheless, she stands. Finally, her limbs move – each step releasing the numbing pinpricks in her nerves as they get used to pacing the small room. 
She tries the door first. Swears she can hear the snort of laughter from farther away when she finds it heavy and locked. He’d moved it like paper earlier, but she swears it must weigh at least fifty pounds with how ineffective her pushes are. 
Next, she explores the cabinets. Plastic bowls and plates, silverware locked in a clear box. The glass from earlier upon closer inspection is nothing but plastic either. No soap, no toiletries. Just water. 
“Can I take a shower?!” She calls, not even bothering to try and find a source for the violent man on the other side. “Or brush my teeth?!”
“Not now.” 
She sighs, filling another cup of water. Not that she expected luxury from her captor. Or that he’d proven himself to be particularly magnanimous. 
The hour is up before she realizes it, and she finds herself annoyed with her traitorous body as it moves to the cot and lies back in her position. No matter how she tries to rationalize her thoughts as trying to stay alive, she still finds herself annoyed with herself for folding so easily to his demands.
"Good girl," his voice rings as the bars return to their position on top of her. She squirms, the indescribable panic creeping up her chest. "You're doing so well; maybe tomorrow we'll give you two hours." 
She whimpers and nods. That does sound nice. He was going to keep her, until at least tomorrow. Still, she feels an aching pain within her. It gnaws at her stomach, twisting and turning as her head began to ache again. "I'm hungry."
She's met with silence. For a second she almost believes he's left. Left her alone in this windowless room as punishment for her wrongdoings. What wrongdoings she can’t be sure of. He'd told her to tell him when she was hungry. He wouldn't have done that if he didn't plan on fixing it. 
The door opens in a woosh. He's standing there, a plate of toast and apple slices in hand as he begins to cross the room toward her cot. 
"Food," he says as if she can't see the plate in his hand. He balances it easily as he walks in, dragging a chair behind him. She says nothing until he sits, the food now balanced on his knee. "No funny business, pollito ." 
She nods, this time merely dropping her mouth for him to put the first apple slice in. She relishes the crunch. The explosion of juice in her mouth is somehow the most satisfying thing in the world to her. Happily, she takes the second slice, watching his dark eyes as they follow the working of her jaw. It's the third slice that he switches hands. He rests his newly freed hand on her stomach. Not pressing down, no trailing of his fingers.
"Did you know I once had a wife? A daughter?" he asks as if telling her a bedtime story. She shakes her head, no. He sighs. 
"Well, I did. Paula and Gabrielle." For a moment he looks peaceful, remembering the family he had. “When I took over the 2099, Paula was furious .”
Her brow furrows, her heart rate quickening against her chest. The hand on her stomach flexes, nails sharp even through the thin cotton shirt. 
“She didn’t like the danger of it,” he sighs. The next bite is a piece of toast, so tiny in the hands of a beast. “Said it was too violent to raise our girl in. But I had a plan, you see.” 
His nails dig into her stomach, pressing, scraping, and flinging as she looks at him with fear-filled eyes. But he doesn’t seem perturbed. It’s like she barely registers as real, a simple doll for him to ground himself with. 
“I had stopped the drug pushing. Or at least the major bits. We still had internationals to deal with. Partners who wanted us to finish contracts, things of that nature. But we were protecting our own, right?” 
Her breath catches when she realizes what his hand is doing. It’s only when he finds it, the high waistband of her leggings, that it registers. He makes quick work of her shirt, rucking it up with one hand as he continues his monologue. 
“Then Jess . Fucking Jess was convinced that George was a good one. Someone who could help us . When has the NYPD ever helped anyone?” His anger is palpable, laced into the tone of each word as his hand slips under the band of her pants. Suddenly her hunger is gone, her eyes widening as he continues his exploration southward.  
“W-wait, I –”
“ Callate perrito ,” he hisses. He is no longer looking at her face, attentions drifting southward as his fingers break the seal of the underwear she’d worn. “Did you know it was George who arranged for the shipment to New York? I told the group, no, we didn’t need it. But George infected us. Made us weak.” 
She can only whimper as his finger trails her slit. It stings, the soft laughter he lets free when he finds her dry. Cruel , she thinks. 
“Tell me, chiquita, do you do the same? Infect your friends with your silly ideas of what is right, only to hurt them in the end?” he spits at her. She doesn’t know whether he wants an actual answer, or if he is simply musing aloud. He withdraws his hand, and for a brief second, she believes maybe that is going to be the end of it. He’ll leave, and come back to feed her in the morning without his touch infecting her. 
She never is that lucky. 
He sticks his fingers in his mouth, giving a gentle suck before slipping them down her pants once more. 
“George,” he continues, pressing his index against her clit. Years of fumbling with boys and he’d found hers within a second of touching her. “He was a bastard. Only brought Jess and me to the meetup. Should’ve known it was a trap. But Jess vouched for him. I wonder, chiquita , if you were home alone, sleeping soundly as your father lead us to death?” 
She has a hard time concentrating on his words, a whimper escaping her mouth as he presses tight circles into her clit. Her body is a traitor, responding to his touches in kind as she feels herself warm. It pools and coils in her gut, a serpent of arousal as he pulls from her feelings she’d pushed far away since that day . 
“I wonder if you celebrated the night he put us behind bars.” He leans forward, his lips just on the shell of her ear. “I wonder if while you celebrated, your father knew what his men were doing to the families of the 2099?” 
She cries out as he lets his finger pierce her opening, still far too dry to receive any sort of penetration. 
“That’s how Jess screamed when they beat her. Cruel, no?” he whispers, drawing the finger out just to slip it back in. “They killed her husband next. A raid with no warrant, no discipline still. Not so much as a reprimand.” 
She can only whimper in return. It feels sickening, the pleasure he rips from her with each stroke of his finger inside. Silently, she is grateful for the bar holding her hips down, refusing to allow her to chase the sensation when he pulls out. The wetness between her legs builds, regardless of her wants. 
“Poor cosita linda, so confused? Imagine how Paula felt when the police came to our house. Took her in front of our angel . Then they told her I was gone.” His words are straight venom, a hiss to add to the sting as he forces a second finger inside. “And they kept coming back.”
Tears flow freely now, and she wants to reach out, push him away, or hold his hand to the only place that doesn’t hurt. But he doesn’t release her. His thumb joins the fray, returning the attention to her clit. 
"I think I figured out what to do with you, linda ." His voice is a razor blade, his tongue a serpent's fork, as he reaches out and tasted the salty tears on her cheeks. "And you're going to enjoy it, aren't you?"
"N-no," she hiccups, weakly. "I don't want–"
"It's not about what you want," he murmurs, and the coil tightens inside her, rushing for release. "It's about making things right. A family for a family. A daughter for a wife."
Her teeth bite into her cheek, drawing blood as her body seizes. She feels as her orgasm courses through her entire being, clenching and releasing her nerves from head to toe until the only thing she can focus on is the two fingers coaxing her down.  
"There you go," he whispers as if soothing a balm on a tiny cut. There is silence for only a moment, the only sound in the room her jagged breathing and soft sobs. "Rest now, chiquita , there will be more in the morning."
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thisworldisablackhole · 9 months ago
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This week in listening 02/23/24
Okay, wow. Today was a massive day for new releases, so let's get a few of those out of the way first. Starting with...
Job For A Cowboy was like... not on my radar AT ALL this year. I listened to this band a bit around 2010, but they were always a little too extreme for me. I'll be honest, the album cover is what sold me on this. The art is giving me huge Born of Osiris vibes, which is another band I used to listen to in the 2010s and have actually been getting back into lately (The Discovery is a fucking incredible record). So, inspired by amazing psychedelic alien artwork, vague nostalgia, and a healthy dose of morbid curiosity, I decided to jump in to this as soon as I woke up. I am actually blown away by how good this is. I'm not a huge metalhead, so I struggle to describe the intricacies of this type of music, but I know for certain it's activating some disgusting primal neurons in my brain. It's heavy, technical, colourful, thoughtful. The guitars whip around with the sharpness of wire torture devices as the bass paints terrifying rhythms into the background of every song. The drums don't just keep up, they hold the leash to maintain control over the chaos and do so flawlessly. The vocals? They add a nice flavouring to the sound but I'm honestly so intrigued by what's going on underneath the surface of these songs that I keep forgetting to listen to him. It's not really a bad thing.
When I was just starting to get back into metalcore a few years ago, I spent a night swapping the aux and drinking beers with my best friend, and he threw on Darkest Hour's song DEMON(S). I was blown away by their ability to inject melody into their sound in a very subtle and nuanced way. They had a much heavier melodeath influence and didn't rely on huge soaring pop choruses like every other -core band of the 2000s. A lot of the melody in their songs comes from the riffs themselves and I love that about them. Even when clean vocals are present, they are mellow in pitch and are used almost more like a texture to enrich the riffing instead of being the main show. When Darkest Hour started dropping singles for this new album my ears perked up right away. Societal Bile showcased a more straight forward thrash influence and I was a little worried that this album would be lacking in melody, but I'm relieved to find that isn't the case. This song in particular is a perfect showcase of the band ability to be heavy and also execute insanely beautiful choruses without being corny about it. Another absolute standout track from this album is Mausoleum, which sounds almost like if Elliot Smith wrote a melodeath song. Trust me, check it out and you’ll know what I mean. I also want to take a second to appreciate that the artwork for this is clearly a nod to The Black Dahlia Murder (rest in peace Trevor Strnad).
Okay, massive diversion away from metal for a second. MGMT is a band that I have always reserved a spot in my heart for despite not being interested in... well... anything they've put out since their debut. Like many other people my age, Electric Feel is more than just a song, it's a core memory. I've listened to few tracks here and there from their other albums out of curiosity but nothing clicked. Not because they weren't good, but because I just wasn't at a place in my life where I was willing to let the magic of MGMT back into my heart. Loss Of Life may very well be the album to change that. When Bubblegum Dog dropped in 2023 I was immediately captivated by the strange, off kilter folkiness of it. Weird, and catchy? Wait a minute, that's the same reason I fell in love with Oracular Spectacular! I haven't listened to this full album yet so we'll see how much of it delivers on those qualities, but I have been jamming this single a lot over the past few days so I had to include it in the list.
I posted a full review for this album here, but I'll do a quick summary. I've racked up about 270 scrobbles out of this album over the past week since it was released, that's like listening to it about 24 times in full (or 3.4 times a day). I absolutely adore this album because it brings back to life everything I loved about music growing up. It's passionate, catchy, emotional, and heavy. Seriously, if you are a fan of My Chemical Romance, early Escape the Fate, AFI, The Used etc etc.. I can not beg you enough to give this album a chance. It's a very well written love letter to that era of 2000s post hardcore and emo bands and you will find it immediately familiar and comforting.
Okay, we are moving away from new releases now. I mentioned in a previous post how I was getting back into prog by listening to bands like TesseracT, Aviations and Artificial Language. The Contortionist is the newest addition to that roster and they bring something very unique to the table. Their instrumentals are heavy but methodical and hypnotic, much like the image on the album art. The thing that stuck out to about this band the most is their singer. I can't get over how much I love his mellow, folky approach to singing on a metal album. I've never heard anything like it. Seriously, take out the metal instrumentation and replace them with Nick Drake's Pink Moon and his voice wouldn't feel out of place at all. The result is a progressive metal album that feels extremely down to earth. If this album had a scent it would be of bark and dirt. Again, somehow the album art has done an immaculate job at representing the sound of the record. I'm obsessed. This is their last album (released in 2017) and is far from their most popular, but I'm curious to go backward and see how their sound progressed to this point.
Thursday is probably going to keep popping up on these roundups because they are my favourite fucking band right now and I never want to stop listening to them. I initially glossed over WATT as a “good but stagnant” entry to their discog, but after hearing lots of people say this is their favourite Thursday album, I knew there had to be something about it that I was missing. Don’t get me wrong, I always enjoyed it, but I felt it lacked the hooks and the gut wrenching punches of Full Collapse, and it also did nothing to push their sound forward like ACBTLD did. Well, I’ve spent the last two weeks listening to it non stop in honour of their WATT tour, and I have to say it’s grown on me so much to the point where it’s become my go to choice when I need a kick in the teeth. I think this album has some of Thursday's heaviest material both sonically and thematically, and it's also a bit more nuanced in the way it shows it's colours. It has a tough shell that takes multiple listens to crack, but it's so worth the time. “Signals Over the Air” was always my fav song from this, but recently “Steps Ascending” and the closer “Tomorrow I’ll Be You” have started to stand out as serious highlights to me. The ending of this song when Geoff yells “I’M CALLING FROM YOUR HOUSE, IN YOUR ROOM, IN YOUR NAME. LAYING IN YOUR BED, FOLLOWING YOUR DREAMS” sends chills up my spine.
Last but not least, I’ve been jamming this album again for pure nostalgia purposes. This album came out when I was 11 and was one of the first/most life changing CD's I ever owned. I was actually inspired to spin this again because of The Requiem’s song “Less Than Zero” has riffs that remind me soo much of some of the songs here. This album just never gets old though, despite it turning 20 next years (I want to cry thinking about that). In fact, I think the older I get, the better these songs sound. I was listening to this while on a long walk the other day and kept finding myself being wildly impressed by the songwriting and guitar riffing. There are so many subtle switch ups happening underneath the surface, and the way the two guitars play around each other is just incredible. The closer you listen the more depth there seems to be. "Under The Knife" and "Injection" are straight up two of the best melodic punk songs ever written. Pure genius.
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t4t-apexeclipse · 2 years ago
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Solar Eclipse
Chapter One: Making a Mess of Things
hey i hope y’all like this!! im scared to start posting it ngl but i wrote all seven chapters of this in like thirty six hours and it’s surprisingly good for something written in a hyperfocused frenzy lmao
also janus may or may not be a touch out of character at certain points but ive always struggled with writing him so pls forgive
Summary: In a drunken stupor, Janus confesses to Patton that he's in love with both Roman and Logan. When things spiral out of control from there, how will he keep his feelings in check?
Characters: Janus, Patton, Logan (mentioned), Roman (mentioned)
Pairing(s): endgame roloceit, focus on janus’s attraction to logan and roman in this chapter
Warnings: alcohol use and a drunk character, and i think that’s it but tell me if i missed something!
Word count: 1,721
~
Janus sighed into his wine glass as he took another sip. It was getting late, he should go to bed soon. He didn't care too much at the moment, if he was honest for once. He could spend another half hour wallowing.
He didn't know how it happened, but he had fallen quite deeply in love with not one, but two of his fellow Sides.
It started with Logan. He tried to deny it at first, hoping that if he paid no attention to his feelings, they wouldn't flourish. However, that hope was quickly squashed, as he soon found himself gazing so fondly at Logan, who was talking about something he'd learned recently, which let Janus know his feelings wouldn't dissipate any time soon.
Then, much more recently, he couldn't stop smiling when Roman sang along with a Disney song during movie night some time ago. That tipped him off to the fact that he had very sudden feelings for Roman as well.
Feelings were truly unfair.
Thinking about all this, Janus downed the last of his wine and refilled the glass.
"Janus?"
Janus whirled around to see Patton standing at the entrance to the kitchen, wearing a sky blue pajama set. The sudden action left his brain swimming, and he groaned in discomfort.
"Patton? What brings you here?"
"I always do a quick check to make sure everyone's in their rooms around this time. Well, okay, mostly Virgil, but I've had to remind Logan and Roman of the time on occasion too."
Janus smirked. That sounded about right.
"I take it you're gonna drag me to bed?"
"I wouldn't say drag. More like... gently nudge?"
Janus scoffed. "Just let me finish this glass, and I'll be on my way."
"Oh, yeah, sure thing. You want some company? I bet drinking that stuff is way more fun with a friend."
Janus still couldn't believe they were friends. It was surreal to say the least.
"If you'd like."
Patton walked up to the table and sat across from Janus. Janus noticed the way he stared at the bottle and grinned.
"You wanna try it?"
Patton looked at Janus, his eyes widened. "Oh, uh, I don't know. I've never had anything like this before, I don't know if I'll like it."
Janus hummed. "Depending on the wine, it can be... bitter. I think you'd like port wine, though. It's a dessert wine."
Patton grinned. "Ooh, that sounds sweet!"
Janus summoned a bottle of rosé port wine and poured it in an appropriate glass.
"Do you like berries?" he asked.
"Yeah, I love berries!"
"Good. Rosé port has a strong berry flavor." Janus set the bottle down and held out the glass. "Would you like to try it?"
Patton seemed to give it some thought, and Janus was patient with him. This was a big decision, especially for a Side like Patton.
"And you're sure I'll like it?"
"While I can't guarantee anything, this is the type of wine I think suits your tastes. Don't worry if you don't like it, I understand that any sort of alcohol is... an acquired taste."
Patton took a quick breath. "Alright. Sure, why not? The worst that could happen is I don't like it, right?"
Technically the worst that could happen is Patton loves it to the point of developing an addiction, but Janus figured saying that would only stress him out.
"Sure."
Patton took the glass, adjusting his hold on it a couple times. He held it so that the stem went between his fingers and he held it from the bottom. "Is this how you hold it?"
Janus grinned. "I'm not sure there's a wrong way of holding it."
Patton nodded, staring at the drink. Janus took a sip of his own drink as he waited.
Patton surprised him a bit when he suddenly took a very quick drink of the wine, downing all of it in one go. His nose scrunched up as he swallowed it.
"Those berries are powerful."
Janus chuckled. "I told you the flavor was strong. So... do you not like it?"
Patton paused, considering. "No, it's good. It just caught me off guard a bit, that's all."
"Well, I'm glad you like it." Janus drank the last of his own wine. "I suppose we should head back to our rooms."
"Yeah, sounds good. Am I drunk yet?"
Janus snorted. "I'd say probably not. Even you can survive a tiny glass of wine."
Patton nodded. "Alright. Okay, yeah, let's go to bed."
Janus waved a hand to clear the table of the wine and glasses. He got to his feet and nearly stumbled back into his chair.
"You okay?" Patton asked as he stood up, putting a hand on Janus's shoulder.
The room was moving.
"I... may have overestimated myself tonight."
"How much did you drink?"
"Um... I'm not sure. I was thinking really hard about something and just... stopped keeping track."
"Do you need help getting to your room?"
Janus hated asking for help. He felt vulnerable asking for help. Though he hated to admit it, at this moment, he technically was vulnerable.
"Maybe," he finally responded.
Patton let Janus lean on him a bit as they made their way to Janus's room. Patton would praise him every few steps, and he hated how much his ego absolutely devoured it.
As they got closer to his room, he only got more and more intoxicated, as the alcohol coursed through his body. He hated getting this drunk, it was embarrassing.
Randomly, thoughts of Roman and Logan floated back into his head. He wondered what they were doing. Were they asleep or working late? He hoped they were asleep, they needed to take care of themselves.
They passed Logan's room on the way to his own, and he tried to stop.
"What? What is it?" Patton asked.
"D'you think Logan's up?" he asked, words slurring together. "We should hang out with Logan."
"No, no, kiddo, it's a bit late for that," Patton said amusedly. What was so funny?
"What about Roman? He's fun."
"Tell you what, kiddo, if you get to bed and sleep for at least eight hours, we can hang out with Logan and Roman all day long tomorrow."
Janus pumped a fist in the air. "Yes!"
"Shhh!" Patton shushed. He was laughing, though. What was he laughing at?
Finally, they reached Janus's door. Patton opened it and led him inside.
"Y'know somethin'?" Janus asked.
"Yeah, kiddo?" Patton replied as he helped Janus get into bed.
"I think... Logan and Roman... would be the cutest couple."
Patton grinned. "Oh, really?"
Janus nodded. "Mhm. I mean, they butt heads a lot, but they always come to an understanding in the end, y'know? They work good together."
Patton nodded. "Hm. Yeah, I guess you're right."
"Kind of a shame, though," Janus murmured.
"What do you mean?"
"I just really like Logan and Roman."
The weight of what Janus just said didn't hit him in his drunken state.
"Oh," Patton said softly. Then his eyes went wide. "Oh!"
Janus fumbled with his covers, trying to get under them.
"Oh, kiddo, don't you wanna get dressed first?"
Janus looked down at his usual outfit, complete with capelet. He looked back up at Patton with furrowed brows. "I am dressed."
"Dressed for bed."
Janus sighed. "I mean, sure, if you think it's necessarily necessary."
"Okay, I'll get you some clothes, you stay right there."
Janus flashed him a grin and a thumbs up.
Patton went through his dresser drawers in search of clothes. Drunk Janus was pretty sure Sober Janus would be having heart palpitations knowing someone was looking through his stuff, but Drunk Janus was too busy staring at his hands to care.
"Patton, why're my hands yellow?" he mumbled.
"Those are gloves, Janus," Patton informed him.
"Oh, yeah."
"Now, kiddo, about, uh... you liking Logan and Roman, are you sure you wanted to tell me that?"
Janus finally looked over at Patton. "What do you mean?"
Patton closed a drawer and stood back up with some clothes in hand. "I just mean... well, you're very... secretive. And that seems like something... well, honestly, it seems like something you'd take to your grave."
Janus supposed his feelings for them would normally bring him stress and guilt and embarrassment. Right now, however, he felt like confessing to them. Maybe reciting a poem if he had time.
He shrugged. "I dunno. I mean... sometimes I just... feel like exploding 'cause of my feelings. And saying it out loud feels better. And right now I wanna say it out loud. I love them. I have for a while. They make me feel... like I can do anything in the world. I don't think they'd ever return my feelings, but it's fine. I've made peace with it."
"Oh, Janus," Patton murmured. "Listen, why don't you get dressed, get some sleep, and we can talk about this more tomorrow?"
Janus felt a jolt of fear as he looked up at Patton. "You're leaving me, aren't you?"
Patton blinked a few times. "Do you... not want me to?"
Janus shook his head. "You're making the bad feelings stop."
Patton took in a shaky breath. "Oh. Of course I can stay with you, as long as you need me to."
Janus smiled. "Good. Thank you."
"No problem."
Janus managed to get dressed on his own, which he was thankful for even in his drunken state. He plopped down on his bed, trying and failing to tuck himself in.
He then looked over at Patton, who had turned his back while Janus got dressed.
"You gonna sleep?" Janus asked.
Patton turned around and cleared his throat. "Uh... should I summon an inflatable mattress or something?"
"There's plenty of bed in this bed," Janus assured. "Unless you're not comfy with that."
Patton paused for a moment. "I'm comfy with it if you're comfy with it."
Janus made grabby hands at Patton.
Patton slowly and awkwardly made his way over to the bed. He got in, and Janus was quick to cuddle him. He chuckled softly.
"Are you always this clingy when you're drunk?"
"The question is, am I always this drunk when I'm clingy? And the answer... yeah, probably."
Patton chuckled again. "Get some sleep, kiddo."
Janus didn't need to be told twice.
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sweetswesf · 2 years ago
Text
Check In
What I Did
Responded to a post I was tagged in in the channel for the Black-male dominated professional engineering group I am in outside of work...was honest about what going through a layoff is like and how people should support people going through it and immediately regretted it
Got through 4 DAYS of 100 Days of Python in a day to catch up
Didn't work out...sat at my damn desk ALL day and neglected dishes and eating better and working out...all to catch up with Python
Received yet another request to meet with this CEO next week who made a random post about a podcast episode I did...I have no clue where it's going and why he has not given up on trying to meet ME after all these years, but we'll see...
Bumped my face against the cabinet door AGAINNN
Finished Alice & Wonderland finally a few days ago and couldn't help but draw parallels, pick out the themes, and cry when Alice slayed the Jabberwocky! "OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!"...that's what I'm going to do with these things I've been battling
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online shopped for like 2 hours (I know...way too long) for back to back days because they're having a special: spend $150 and get $100...I'm very indecisive because I don't have much time to shop and don't want to do it often, and the stuff I buy tends to stay with me for YEARS...and I had a LOT of gift cards at Free People (THAT IS MY STORE!!!)...I bought these! Hopefully they fit, hopefully it was worth it...I feel like I keep trying with little pieces...one day, people are going to be sending me my designer wardrobes for free...these are going to hold me over and hopefully inspire me to the attract the opportunities that help get me there; I like comfortable, cute, unique, different things...with a feminine hippie undertone:
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What I Learned
They say people will be more attracted to you the less they know about you, and for someone as open and vulnerable as me, this has been hard...I guess this is why I feel like this blog is so therapeutic: I can get my feelings out, have them read without knowing who the reader is and without the reader knowing who I am
Feeling
Dependent on my friend...I really look forward to meeting with her biweekly; she couldn't come to our meeting today and I felt a little sad...it made me scared because I'm so used to being left/made to look dumb
Accomplished...I've built Hangman, Rock, Paper, Scissors, and a few other things; I regretted starting the 100 Days of Python since I already know the language instead of going harder on the Algos, but I am doing it to get to the harder lessons on stuff I don't know and just to get faster with the language which will help me both in the algos and on the job eventually, especially since, I tend to lose my train of thought mid-algo sometimes...Like today, I figured out how to add recursion to my problem by accident, and recursion is really difficult for me...PLUS, I'm learning a lot of new tricks and resources I never knew of even in these beginning lessons...most importantly it's getting me up to work at my desk and reminding me that I can sit for long, knock out some Pomodoros and ...I worked more hours yesterday than I have in one setting all month...
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My A1C levels are on the bridge for pre-diabetes...like if I was 0.1 over on my score, I would be considered pre-diabetic...so I need to get that in check...I was inspired to check by this healthy Black YouTuber Hallease and my grandmother has diabetes...that life is NOT fun...movement helps but it contradicts going hard on this interview prep stuff...I added the Pomodoro Gym Chrome extension to make sure I get up because my FitBit watch KEEPS giving me a rash...I hate it...
Glad I overcame the paranoid thoughts of having a brain issue...
Sad at all the time I've wasted in the past on social media procrastinating from doing the work and making things harder for myself
Glad I meet weekly with an old colleague...white girl gets me and we relate...but she reminds me of an old friend that ended up ghosting me and acting like she didn't know me...PEOPLE are hard to trust
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Takeaways
I'm going to get better at this stuff
I'm not getting fat...looking in the mirror I see more definition in my body despite me feeling chubby cheeked in the Google Meets video
Going to start doing Advent of Code: 25 Python challenges in the month of December...happens every year since 2015...I attempted once and gave up after like a day; FINALLY found the name of it after reaching out to a mentor to me who helped me get ad revenue on my project from bootcamp
I don't judge homeless people who spend money on drugs or other non-essentials...it's a HUMAN thing to spend things on what feels good in the moment and lose sight of what the money is really for...we're all trying
I can't judge people who are laid off, collecting unemployment, or food stamps, etc.
I believe I am going through a lot of these experiences to become more humble and judge less
Taking this time to focus on building skills is a good thing...I'd rather do it now than when I'm too old...I saw another guy on LinkedIn leave his good job to do the same: train up skills as he knew he wouldn't be able to work and do both...I'm excited to see who I will become after I learn these skills
I don't like my gym crush anymore...I embarrassed myself trying to get his attention in the gym and it was like chasing down a child...I already attract attention being this short, bulky, Black girl amongst all the men on the weights level...I noticed his new neck tattoo of praying hands and it just read to me "irresponsible spending" and I know I shouldn't think that way because I just bought clothes when I have PLENTY of them already and nowhere to go...we all try...
I have to stop panicking and getting in my head
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How I Got Myself Out of a Rut
Prayer; reminding myself that God won't leave me
Pushed myself to finish the coding lessons
Told myself that I won't be in this forever, I'm going to get better, I'm limitless, and me getting to the next level is predicated on MY actions
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Goals Completed
Found a therapist
Stopped listening to people worried about their own circumstances and remembering God works on his own time and that I am in no rush...
Got back on the ball
Being kinder to myself and stopping guilting myself if my energy isn't always on 100%
Goals To Complete
Strengthen my relationship with God
Understand the main concepts I need to from Interview Cake, AlgoExpert, etc. in 6 months, NOT less than 3
Drop my body fat percentage to Marion Jones, Michaela Cole, or Jade Cargill levels
Consistently fight urge to fill up my time with social media/YouTube
Fully forgive my family & build a great relationship with them
Be more confident & faithful
250 steps/hour & 10k steps/daily consistently
Drink more than 64oz a day consistently
Go on a date with a guy I actually like who actually likes me too
Learn more about my gym crush & get him to ask for my number
Get a house similar to that one in Spain
Update my personal app
Complete 100 Days of Python
Complete Advent of Code
Decorate the plastic Christmas tree with the ornaments I HAD to buy
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petrichoraline · 11 months ago
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Northanger abbey!! I adore Cathrine, she's so fun and her intuition is on point, it's just that her imagination is a bit wild but then again she's young so she'd get better at placing her feelings eventually... My favorite thing about henry is his house lol from what I remember nice house surrounded by trees and dogs, away from everyone what's not to love, also he knows about fabrics and colors and novels so... He's funny so I can for give the obnoxiousness and he's responsible which is a trait austen loves in her leading men. I love how austen allows her heroines to be loud and wrong and still give them a happy ending, they have their flaws but they don't have to pay for them, they learn and correct and apologize. Sorry for ranting lol
the timing of this message couldn't be more perfect, i picked up my book and read for about an hour, got on here and i've been scrolling just thinking "gotta get back to it, gotta get back to ittt" 😂 so I'll be doing that once I answer (they're on their way to the abbey with catherine for the first time rn, exciting for both her and me lol)
I am so impressed with how smart she actually is because I was under the impression she might be too gullible. she, however, though a bit too good-natured and thinking the best of people at all times, knows what she likes and what she doesn't. she doesn't get swayed by the compliments of a guy she's decided sucks big time (unlike belle who turns her head in the direction of anyone willing to show her even a bit of attention)(im a bit more of an isabella than a catherine in that regard but we're working on it shh); catherine can be stubborn, she has a backbone, a strong moral compass (reminds me of fanny a bit) and she learns from her mistakes. follows her morals while still worrying about bringing pain upon her loved ones that she has to oppose - the thorpes and james trying to stop her from running and explaining herself to miss tinley after john lied without her permission?? oh I was boiling, the fact she stood her ground till the very end made me so happy and appreciative of her as a heroine and her worrying about their regard towards her afterwards made her that much more likeable, she's just so sweet and considerate even when met with the worst behaviour. sure, she can be too trusting and trying to resolve conflicts in an honest and direct way which is just not how things work in the world she's becoming a part of but she is a girl turning into a young woman. as far as I'm concerned, any mistakes she makes, I forgive.
"my favorite thing about henry is his house" what a valid take lmao i am yet to read a description of the abbey but henry so far is giving me mixed feelings, I checked the ages and they're 17 and 25? so I feel like I'm getting a bit of a condescending attitude from him? but I might be wrong. it would be natural, though, as catherine is a teenager and his brain is supposedly fully developed, that her more childish view of things would call for amused reactions on his side. I don't know, so far really my focus is on "where and how are things going to get messy" because in this book quite a lot of the time nothing is truly really..happening? hahah and I was promised drama from jane austen herself in the first chapters:
"It is now expedient to give some description of Mrs. Allen, that the reader may be able to judge, in what manner her actions will hereafter tend to promote the general distress of the work, and how she will, probably, contribute to reduce poor Catherine to all the desperate wretchedness of which a last volume is capable- whether by her imprudence, vulgarity, or jealousy - whether by intercepting her letters, ruining her character, or turning her out of doors."
I started this book quite a while ago but this has stuck with me and maybe I am misunderstanding and she is actually not going to do these things (I love all the sarcasm but sometimes I have trouble catching it cause, well, non-native english speaker) or I am supposed to be on the lookout the whole time lol but in any case I EXPECT ACTION. PLEASE. it's such a short novel, why are there boring parts 😔
responsible really seems to be the most desirable trait in an austen man but I get it and honestly it's a good thing to consider in dating nowadays as well 🤷‍♀️ as for Henry's other qualities, I forgot he understands fabrics!! thank you for reminding me. that guy has so much sensitivity about him so why must he be such a lil gremlin at times 😂
i agree with you completely <3 austen's heroines are just women being women and i love that though they share some noble qualities they're all easy to distinguish from each other (considering some plotlines are quite similar.) catherine might be, so far, the one most after my own heart out of all the girls.
I may update on how I feel about all of the characters and the story so I'll try to tag in case you're interested in my ranting 😊 would love to hear from you again, it's so exciting receiving a message about this, you have no idea, I usually only discuss shows so my liveblogging of reading the novel actually reaching someone and prompting an ask is such a delight, thank you so much for sending a message and a long one at that 🥰💓
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angst-fairygodmother · 5 years ago
Note
Might I request: “There is enough room for both of us” & "You're warm" (& I'ma be a predictable binch & ask for Valdo x reader) :3
A/N: Did someone say sick fic? Oh wait that was me. I hope you enjoy this lovely. :)Word Count: 1660Content Warning: Mild swearing.
Silence stretched over the two travelers as they walked down the road, their dappled pack pony plodding placidly between them.
“Remind me again why we bought this beast instead of mounts for the both of us?” Valdo asked, his sharp tenor the first sound either of them had made in hours.
“Because the only thing we could afford two of was donkeys. And you said your dignity would not suffer an ass,” you snapped, rolling your eyes before muttering under your breath. “So instead I have to.”
You weren’t sure what had brought on the mood you were in, whether it was how tired and sore you were from walking or the gloom of the damp, chilly day, or something else entirely, but you honestly worried that if you did not reach the next town soon, you might throttle your companion, no matter how much you loved him.
“Ah yes, I recall now. I still say that horse trader was trying to swindle us. No matter, the market in Vizima will be much better.”
“Only if we ever get there.”
The next thing you knew, you were stopped short as you crashed into Valdo. You shot him a glare, wondering how he had managed to circle the horse to stop short and invade your personal space without you noticing.
“Alright, Y/N,” he said, frowning. “What on the Gods’ green Earth is your problem?”
You sighed. “I am tired. We’ve been traveling for days without sight or sign of anyone else on this stupid road. Everything hurts. My eyes feel like I’ve been rubbing sand in them for fun. There’s a storm on the horizon. And I’m fucking freezing. So can we please keep walking? I’d like to make it to the city before I die.”
Whatever Valdo might have said in response was cut off as you sneezed, sniffling pathetically after. Immediately his cross expression dropped as he reached out to place the inside of his wrist against your forehead.
“Wha…what are you doing?” you asked looking up at the curly-haired idiot like he had grown a second head.
“You’re warm.” He stated as if that was any answer. “Y/N, my darling, why didn’t you say you were unwell?”
You shifted uncomfortably, feeling your face flush. “It didn’t seem to matter that much. There’s nothing to be done but get to town anyway. So can we…?” you made a ‘keep moving’ gesture.
He frowned and then turned to the docile pony munching on grass that peeked up through the stones of the road, shuffling bags around, taking some off and setting them aside.
“What are you doing Valdo?” you asked exasperatedly.
“It won’t be the most comfortable ride, but I won’t have you exhausting yourself and making it worse,” he explained, shouldering several packs.
“It’s a cold, I’m not an invalid!”
“Sundrop, please. Your equine escort awaits. If you won’t care for your own health then do it for me.” He pressed his graceful hands together in a prayer-like pose and gave you that irritatingly irresistible pout. You sighed in defeat.
“You know there’s room enough for both of us.” You said as you climbed up into the saddle, shifting around to awkwardly settle between the various packages on the pony’s back.
“We both know that’s horseshit. Especially with all our stuff.”
You raised an eyebrow at him, or rather at the swear passing his lips. Usually he was lovingly exasperated at your coarse language and not one to use it himself. He caught your glance and shrugged as if to say ‘odd circumstances allow odd behavior.’
“Pony shit actually,” you said with a smirk and another sniffle. “But I guess you’re probably right.”
He chuckled and shook his head ruefully, taking the pony’s reins in hand and leading off down the road at a slightly brisker pace than you had been going.
~
By the time the gates of Vizima came into view, an early night had fallen and the howling wind had both of you pulling fur-lined cloaks close. Your pony’s head was bowed miserably as icy torrents of rain poured from the sky. You shivered violently despite the layers, the chill weather heightening the effects of your fever.
Still, Valdo insisted on pressing inward toward the center of the city in search of “a decent inn.” You had half a mind to start begging to stop literally anywhere just to get inside when he finally found one that satisfied him, The Bee and the Bottle. As soon as you passed into the yard an eager straw-haired boy of maybe seven ran out, offering to take care of your pony, words whistling through the gap of missing front teeth.
You felt hands wrap around your waist, gently lifting you down and then steadying you when your feet touched ground and you swayed. Wobbling with exhaustion and cold, you turned to the child.
“You take good care of Spot here, alright?” you asked ruffling his hair and causing him to giggle. “If you do, I’ll see about sneaking you some sweets before we leave.”
He nodded eagerly at your offer. “I promise, I’ll be extra good to ‘im and make sure all his tack is shiny and clean. You’ll see.”
“And see if you can’t find someone to bring our bags to our room?” Valdo tried to keep the order out of his voice and found himself smiling as the boy saluted him before leading the creature away.
“Spot? Really dove?” Valdo whispered in your ear as he led you into the inn by the elbow.
You shrugged peevishly. “If you had named him when we bought him you could have called him whatever you wanted. I could have done worse.”
~
You sank gratefully into the luxurious bath, letting the road-weariness melt from you and the lightly minty steam work into your sinuses and throat to soothe their sting. Valdo’s fingers worked their way through your hair, massaging your scalp but you frowned, noticing their clumsy motions, no sign of his normal nimbleness. Reluctantly you pried your eyes open and twisted to look at him.
Immediately your eyes fell to his blue-tinged lips and you sighed. Your fingers curled around his wrist and you both gasped at the temperature difference between your skins.
“You’re useless to me if you freeze to death love,” you teased. “Why don’t you get in the water and thaw out?”
“Y/N,” he groaned. “I am supposed to be taking care of you. I can’t just take your bath.”
“I wasn’t suggesting that. There’s room enough for the both of us. Please?” You cast your most pleading expression up at him, knowing that he was weaker to your charms than he cared to admit.
Without a word, he began unbuttoning his damp shirt (having discarded his doublet earlier in expectation of helping you wash). You smiled softly at him before settling back in against the wall of the tub. Moments later, the water sloshed as Valdo slid in beside you, long arms wrapping around your middle to draw you against him. He pressed his lips to your temple, beard tickling where it brushed your face.
“Oh sweetheart, you are definitely feverish. As soon as you’re washed,” he lathered soap into a cloth and began to sweep it over your shoulders and back as he spoke, “we’re getting you straight to bed. I’ll have the innkeeper bring you some soup, and tea. Something herby and probably horrible tasting that will chase this sickness away.”
Valdo Marx was many things, but you knew he was not necessarily the most nurturing of men and the prospect of caring for you while you were ill was daunting. The fact that he was doing it at all was truly special, so you hummed in appreciation for his ministrations, leaning in to his touch and doing your best to comply with his wordless requests for movement until he was satisfied that you had been fully bathed.
As the water cooled to a tepid temperature, he reluctantly exited the tub, gathering up a particularly plush towel to wrap around you, sweeping you into his arms and carrying you to the bed. He gently dried you off and helped you into your favorite nightshirt (which he noted wryly was actually his missing shirt which you had claimed months ago not to have seen).
“I feel the need to remind you,” you said, stifling a yawn, “I am not an invalid.”
“Hush, love. And lay down. Rest.”
A series of violent sneezes shook your body and he found himself torn between fretting over you and admiring the truly adorable noises you made.
You groaned as you recovered your breath from the fit and relented to the idea of curling up in the many layers of blankets that invited you. As you snuggled down, you clung to Valdo’s hand, not letting him get up from his seat at the edge of the bed.
“Stay,” you murmured. “I need you to cuddle me.”
He smiled, soft and longing. “And why is that angel?”
Even as he asked, he shifted the covers to allow him to slip in beside you, curled around you like a cat.
“Because I’m still so cold. And you’re warm.” You burrowed closer, pressing your bodies together to sap as much of his body heat as possible, and he was content to let you.
His embrace tightened around your shoulders and he tucked your head up under his chin.
“Your wish is my command. Try to get some sleep.”
He pressed his lips to the top of your head and you closed your eyes, safe and content. He listened to your breathing for a while, intent for any rasp or stutter in the air, only relaxing when he heard it begin to settle into the slow, steady pattern of sleep.
Just as he was drifting off himself he thought he heard you mumble “I love you” and his lips curled upward blissfully.
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weird-is-life · 2 years ago
Text
When night falls, I am your escape #9
Sumarry: After avoiding her home town for a long time because of the boy who broke her heart. Y/N goes home to spend the longest time there in 15 years. The problem is that he is home, too. Daniel wants to reconnect with her, but she wants nothing more than to just avoid him.
Warnings: language
Chapters: 9/12
Words: 2.2k Masterlist
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A few days later, I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing. I didn't even check, who was calling me, I just picked up. I was ready to curse the hell out of some of my friends from London because I thought they were the ones, that forgot about the time zone and called me at that ridiculous hour.
"Hello?" I said very sleepily.
"Morning Y/N, it's Mike"
"Dude, are you seriously calling me at 7 fucking am?" I asked in disbelief.
"Yeah, what's wrong with that?" puzzled Mike.
"What's wrong with that? Some people are still sleeping at this ungodly hour, you know" I yawned.
"Sorry?" he said jokingly.
"Uhh whatever, I'm awake now. So what do you need?" I questioned.
"Right, so I wanted to ask if you would like to come on a hike with us" he quickly said.
"Wait what?" my only a few minutes awaken brain wasn't processing, what he was asking. "On a hike? With you? Who is us?" I quizzed.
"Yes on a hike. Me and a few other blokes, they are chill, you'll like them" I was 100% sure, that Daniel was one of the 'chill blokes', so I didn't even ask.
"Umm, I don't know if I feel up for it" I wasn't too lean on the idea. I mean, the feelings after a conversation with Daniel were still very raw, even if it was like a week ago.
"C'mon, it'll be fun. It's not very long and plus the view is really worth it" he tried to convince me. But I didn't even know why he was asking me in the first place. We haven't hung out in ages, it was weird. It probably had something to do with me and Daniel being relatively okay, now.
"I don't know" I was hesitating, on what to answer.
"Please, do you have anything better to do?" to be honest, no, I didn't have anything better to do, but the thought of hanging out with Daniel still made me a bit anxious.
"When do you want to go?"
"Yes yes, tomorrow early in the morning" he happily answered.
"Don't celebrate just yet, I didn't say yes. I'm just asking for more info" I still wasn't convinced about going with them.
"Oh come on Y/N, just say yes. It will be great, you'll see. Come with us, please, please, please " he pleaded.
It took a lot of convincing, but I eventually said yes. I didn't want to go, but Mike made it his mission to get Daniel and me back to being friends. So he spends a good few minutes convincing me.
We were to go as he said, early in the morning, from Daniel's house. We were going to carpool from there.
Also, I had no hiking clothes or shoes, so I had to go shopping. So my whole afternoon consisted of shopping and baking cookies for the hike.
---
The morning was tough. I mean, when was getting up at 5.30 a.m. easy, never. I still complained a lot, but in the end, I got ready, packed my backpack, which was completely full, and set out to get to Daniel's house.
I think I've been to his house so many times in the last few weeks, that I knew the way like the back of my palm.
If you think about it, it was like the universe was playing a joke on me. I mean, I came here with the intention of not being seen by anyone, especially Daniel, but now I was on my way to go on a hike with him.
Funny. Right? I thought so too.
This distracted my mind and before I knew it, I was getting my backpack out of my car and greeting everybody.
" What's up Y/N, you slept okay?" Mike greeted me.
"Hey, yeah, what about you," I asked, while I looked around for the other guys, but only Michael seemed to be out there.
"Yup, if you are wondering, where is everybody, they'll be out in a minute" he must have noticed my confused face.
"Alright, so which car are we taking?" I asked.
" The truck, I mean it's the biggest, we can fit all the things in there" he pointed at the car I remembered very well. Daniel drove drunk me in that car.
"Ahh that's great," I said with fake excitement. I mean, it was kind of embarrassing, to be honest.
"I'm gonna see, what's takin-" he didn't finish, because they came out of the house. It was only Daniel with some other guy, who I didn't recognize.
"Finally guys, what was taking you so fucking long? Anyways, Blake meets Y/N and Y/N meets Blake" Mike introduced the two of us.
"Nice to meet you," we both said at the same time and then chuckled.
"So is it gonna be just us four?" I asked.
"Yeah, there were supposed to be 5 of us, but one of us got sick, so yeah just 4," Mike said. Daniel was unusually quiet, so I looked at him, only to find him already looking at me.
But my focus snapped back to Michael who was ushering us to the car. He quickly seated himself behind the steering wheel and Blake followed his suit and sat down in the second front seat. That left me and Daniel in the backseat.
"Any music preferences?" Blake turned to look at me.
"Anything great," I said with a cheeky smile. I was very curious about what he would put on. To my surprise it wasn't bad at all, I enjoyed it quite a lot.
After he set the music, I and Blake talked. I learned a few things about him, like, that he works for Daniel, the same as Michael.
But Daniel was still pretty quiet, munching on some weird food. But that just as quickly changed.
"Do you want some? " he nudged my arm. I looked at what he was holding in his hands. I didn't want to just coldly turn him away, so I nodded.
"What is it?" I pointed at the unknown bag. I didn't know what he was offering me, because the front of it was turned his way.
"Try and see" he pushed the bag closer to me. I cautiously took the weird-looking food out of the bag and tried it. It looked disgusting and it tasted even worse. It was like I ate salty grass.
"Ugh, what the fuck is that" I slightly coughed.
"Dried seaweed," he said between laughs
"Yuck, you eat that?" I looked at him in disbelief.
"It isn't that bad" he defended himself.
"It really is" came a voice from the front, it was Blake.
"Right? Thank you" I agreed with him.
" It's only getting worse," I said and immediately reached for my water.
"Okay okay I get, you guys don't like it," he said defeated. You chuckled at that and then the conversation quieted down.
The whole car was almost quiet after that, except for the music playing and a few small talks.
I avoided Daniel's gaze the whole time, it just felt a little weird to be sitting almost right next to him. Yeah, it definitely felt weird.
But I tried to not feel like that, even spoke to him like 2 times.
Me being cool with him was still a work in progress. But the hike itself was much more chilled.
"So how long is it supposed to take?" I asked them.
" Around 3,5 hours" Michael replied.
"3,5 hours? That's quite a lot" I mentally prepared myself for the exhausting journey.
" Don't worry, it's not bad and not even that long. Mike just goes, like he is on his daily walks, so it takes us a little longer" Daniel approached you.
"He does walk really slowly" I laughed with him as Mike walked clueless next to Blake.
"He does, doesn't he? " he smiled at me once more time before he asked.
"Are you enjoying your time in Australia?"
"Umm, yeah. I missed it a lot, London is great, but home is home, you know " I said.
"That's true. I totally get that" of course he did. He was never home, always traveling.
"You live in London too, right?" I asked to make a casual conversation. I wanted to give him a chance to be friends again.
"Partly, when I'm not there, I'm in Monaco or wherever we are racing" the constant traveling sounded exhausting by only talking about it.
"It must be tough, flying so much," I said.
"Yeah, it is. But I'm living the dream, so I can't complain" he smiled.
"What's it like?" I had to ask him. It bugged me sometimes not knowing anything about his life, I mean, I was part of that dream once.
"It's great, I get to travel the world, and see some amazing places. I get to do what I love every day and it opened so many opportunities for me, so yeah I love it" he said enthusiastically. I could see that he really loves what he does.
"That's great" I replied and I didn't know what else to say to him.
"How about you? Do you like being a lawyer?"
"Yeah, sometimes it's a lot, but I get to help people, so yeah I love it, too" I didn't have much more to say.
"It's good to know you, ya know," he said with a smirk.
"What do you mean," I asked.
"I mean, that if I ever get in trouble, I know a pretty good lawyer to help me out" he laughed.
"How do you know I'd help you? " I raised my eyebrows teasingly.
"Wouldn't you?" it was his turn to raise his eyebrows in a cheeky way, now.
"I don't know, I would have to think about it" we were bantering like the old times, "but, hopefully, I won't ever have to do that " I chuckled.
"Hope not," he said and I thought that he was going to stay quiet after that but he added, " but you never know, I can be a bad boy, you know. "
"Okay bad boy, we should pick up our pace, we are falling behind the guys" I said with a laugh.
"We probably should, how the fuck did they get so far with Mike's snail walk" with that we went to join the guys and stayed with them the rest of the way up.
After exhausting 2 hours of walking, we finally got to the place. And let me tell you, it looked way better than I'd expected. The view was really beautiful.
"Let's take a photo together," Blake said to us all, while I was admiring the picture in front of me.
We got another hiker to take the photo. I stood awkwardly next to the guys until Daniel softly pulled me by my sleeve and put his hand around my shoulders. I relaxed and showed a real smile for the photos, which turned out great.
We didn't get to enjoy the view for very long, because we saw some rainy-looking clouds coming our way.
"Uh guys, we should probably go like really fast, those clouds don't look nice," I said with a bit of concern.
"Yup, we definitely should" we didn't waste any time and made our way down.
We were almost at the car, literally like one kilometer away from it, when it started pouring rain.
"Shit, run" I squealed and took off running with the guys at my heels.
The running didn't help one bit, by the time we got to the car, we were soaked.
"I feel like I have a lake in my shoe" I complained.
"Don't mind your shoe, what about my car, we can swim in it after?" Daniel said with a painful expression and I couldn't help but break into a fit of laughter. Soon after I was joined by all the guys.
When we finally calmed down, we all ushered Mike to quickly get us home.
"Hopefully we won't get sick," I said.
"You know what this reminded me of?" Daniel looked at me.
"Not really" I didn't know what he meant.
"That one time I threw you in the sea" he grinned.
"Ah yes, the excellent idea, that you had" I rolled my eyes.
"I remember that. You got sick, didn't you guys" Mike chipped in.
"I got sick and he didn't" I corrected him.
"I still don't understand how you didn't get sick" it annoyed me up to this day.
"It's the Ricciardo genes" he joked.
It was like that the whole ride back. We were all joking and laughing together. It felt nice, it felt right to be with them again. But when we finally got to Daniel's house, i said my goodbyes.
"I can let you borrow some of my clothes to change into. You don't need to drive home completely soaked to the bone " Daniel said.
"It's alright" I didn't want to overstep the begging of our friendship.
"Are you sure?" he asked concerned about me getting sick again.
"Yeah, I think I can survive 10 more minutes. But thank you, really" I appreciated his offer.
"Thank you for today guys. I had so much fun. Thank you. See you. It was lovely to meet you Blake " I gave them one last smile and left.
.....
Taglist: @wonderlandofsu @eniram-du @theworldofemmy @citylights31 @readerselegance @queenanababy @mgajdaaa @tall-tanned-tattoo
Thank you so much for reading. This took a little longer, but we got there. Also huuge thanks to my beautiful beta-reader, you are a real treasure🧡🧡. Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist. Have a great day and stay safe everybody. Peace out ☀️ Chapter#10
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leafostuff · 2 years ago
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Our Little Secret (Ft. NiziU Miihi
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note: so...i had a birthday like 4 days ago (im 18 so pog) and i decided to write This Miihi oneshot since she is one of my favorite Idols, i hope you all enjoy this
12 AM
First night of summer and god you are struggling to sleep, maybe it was still excitement from the fact that you finished school as a Senior, leaving you to only have the Adult life ahead of you, maybe its more Stress of not knowing what to do with your life but whatever it was it costed you some important sleep hours.
another look at your phone and the hour was 12:03 AM, “maybe a walk should be enough to calm my brain down” you thought to yourself as you jumped out of the window, the height wasn't too high, so no damages were done as you took your phone and wrote a message to your parents how you went to a walk, fortunately your parents gave you a thumbs up, and your walk has begun
10 minutes has passed, and your small adventure brought you to the park, as basically you were listening to music in your ear buds and checking up funny memes on Discord, few laughs and a comment later you take a look at the members list and notice someone specific who was online.
“quite unusual of her to be online this time” you thought as you opened a DM with her and write a Simple question, “Cant sleep?”  you ask in the chat, a couple of seconds later she responds, “yeah” a simple response but an effective one, “Thought maybe i could take a walk in the park to calm my nerves” another message came in as you couldn't help yourself but smile lightly, as you just noticed what she was saying.
“Want to meet on the bridge?” another quick typing which resulted in a Quick thumbs up emoji, as you stood up from the bench you were sitting on and heading to the bridge, as you got there you were just leaning your back on the side of the bridge, as from the corner of your eye you notice her heading to you.
Miihi was one of your best friends ever since the two of you were very young, not 5 years old like all the movies talk about, but like since age 10, so now as the both of you finished school forever, you knew each other for 8 years which included many smiles since just seeing her could turn your day upside down, and in the end the two of you kinda grew to a friend group which included some of her friends and yours, making a amazing friend group. as she was standing in front of you she was wearing a White T-shirt, followed with a black sweatshirt and and fairly basic pants, nothing too fancy for a midnight walk.
"So….first day of summer, huh? we finally got to it” You ask as Miihi shows her smile and joins you on the bridge, leaning on the side and watching the stars together with you.
“Yeah, finally is school is over, and we could do whatever we want now” She added, “do you have plans for the summer? or you're just going to laze around and do nothing like me?” she asked as in response you just shrugged, since even you don't know what are your plans for the summer.
“To be honest, i thought about maybe Trying to get a job for the summer, before i get to college, what about you? i guess that a scholarship so you dont really need to work that much to pay for it” You knew how smart Miihi was, topping your class and is considered one of the smartest students in the school.
“Oh…So we won’t have much time to hang out don't we?” her smile changed slowly into a frown as she looked down, it was true that you will not hang out as much anymore, yes there will be your almost daily discord chats, but its not the same as meeting in person.
Suddenly, she showed a little smile and held your hand “Follow me” she started running, getting you to follow her quickly with a run from your own, “If this is the one of the last times we will meet like this….it means we should make it the best night ever” She said as her comment made you smile brightly, it was so good to hear how important your friendship was to her.
10 minutes of running later the two end up at her Mansion, Miihi was the  daughter of one of the richest families in the town, so mansion to live in is something not surprising.
However instead of going to the house directly, Miihi instead turned right, walking toward her Family Pool, the both of you stopped in front of the Pool house as she left your hand. "I'm going to switch up for a swimsuit, don't you dare peek" she said as she gave you a Wink as she closed the sliding door and the curtain as well 
"What about me?" You ask, realizing you didn't expect to come with a Swim shorts of your own.
"Get on with your pants or something" She spoke through the sliding door as you took your shirt off, and left it near the the pool, you were always less comfortable showing your body and would get Insecure going to a pool together with your friends, but it couldn't be that bad, it was your friend Miihi, what was the worst that can hap-.
“I'm ready” Miihi said, as she got out of the pool house, wearing a Pink swimsuit, as you could feel your face getting hotter by the second, and unfortunately she got notice of it fast “OOO…someone is blushing, its Just me” she added as she giggled and leaned closer. after Miihi opened the Pool which took a couple of minutes she smiled at you cutely, you return the smile when suddenly…
*Splash*
You find yourself in the pool, as you look up you see a Laughing Miihi in front of you as she sat on the edge of the pool “come on, you know it was worth it dont you?” she asked as you just rolled her eyes “ok, just sit with me” she added as she gave you her hand to get up however…
*Splash*
“ha….HAHAHAHAH” she started laughing as you couldnt help but join her as the two of you just started goofing around in the water, from swimming quietly to Splash fights the two of you really had one of the best nights that could ever be, the hour was around 1:30 AM as another splash fight was going as in the end you cornered Miihi to one of the corners as the two of you started laughing as the stopping gotten quieter and the two of you were gazing at each other’s eyes as one thing was on your and probably Miihi’s mind
“so….close” your thoughts clouded your senses as the Both of you lean your faces closer to each other…and closer…and closer as finally the both of you kiss, Lips were awfully sweet even more than you expected as you could feel her hands get slowly around your back and yours go to her waist, even while both of your eyes closed you can feel the movement of you sitting on the edge of the pool with Miihi on your lap.
Miihi was your star, there was no way to deny it, from her long and smooth hair that you could feel touching your skin, her hands that were softer then the most fluffies wool a sheep could ever produce were now on your chest, feeling how loud your hearts knocks and how her large yet adorable brown eyes that made every wish by her a command were now starting to tear up slowly as the both of you moved away from the kiss, you could swear you seen her eyes sparkle from the tears, smiling from side to side Miihi just leans her forehead close enough to touch yours, as you smile lightly and mirror her, almost as the both of you were telepathizing your feelings as no words were needed between the two of you.
“Woah” you just said, shocked from your intimate connection the two of you just had as Miihi just giggled in response
“Yeah….indeed woah” she said as your hands without any thought just went to her hair, twirling it around your finger and pushing some of them to the side, to see her true beauty. “i…want you to stay with me the night….together” she simply said as all you could was just nod and hug her tight.
\
~-~
2:30 AM
First night of summer, 2 Showers, and a movie later the both of you are laying on the sofa since there wasn't any mattress, so you had to resort to Miihi using you as her mattress while you could only have the sofa, the lights were closed as the both of you were just whispering to each other lightly.
“so? what i am drawing on your skin?” even while the both of you were falling asleep you still tried to talk as much as possible, your finger was on her back drawing some shapes.
“It's a heart isn't it?” she asked quietly as you just shook your head.
“No, it's a bunny, see? i did the ears” you replied as you traced the the motion of the ears, “And now i did the face” you added another motion as you could feel her humming feel like music to your ears “and i added a nose” as you teasingly tapped your nose as she just giggled.
“god whatever…you know…i think this going to be *Yawn* the best summer we will ever have” she said as she closed her eyes, her smile still felt through her aura as she just started fall asleep, as you couldnt help but smile at her cuteness.
“uh…yeah, you are right…the best summer ever” you said as suddenly your face started to frown as you opened up your phone to look at your mails, and one that you kept for a long time was still sitting there “You have been chosen to work Under Starship Ent, the flight to Korea will be at the 1st of July 2022” the Message said as you just looked at the message, not knowing how will you have the bravery to tell this to her.
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Thanks for Reading and i will see you all Next update
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yourmidnightlover · 4 years ago
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never go back
Summary: spencer notices how your boyfriend takes advantage of you and finally does something about it.
TW: titty sucking, oral (female receiving), cheating, dom!spencer, scratching, slapping (only one), cursing, choking, spencer dirty talk lol, penetrative sex, creampie. *let me know if i missed anything*
WC: 3,724
A/N - i'm using noah as the 'other man' schtick in probably all of my future one shots bc i can't find it within myself to create a new character each and every time. so your douche of a bf will always be noah miller. if you ever get a nice bf i'll be sure to change his name but for now this is what we're working with. got it? got it.
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there are many things that people should go back to. schooling, maybe an old job, an old vacation spot.
your boyfriend was not one of those things.
mostly because your boyfriend sucked.
it was now a fact that spencer reid himself had come to believe quite a while ago and now, well now he had reason.
he had always felt as though you were too good for noah, similar for practically anyone in existence (himself included). he was always a complete ass to you no matter the circumstance.
there was one time the entire team had been back really late from a case that took a toll on all of you. it was emotionally and physically draining. the flight back had been delayed because of weather issues in the state you had been in, meaning you couldn't leave until days after it was solved.
any time you had gone to answer the phone, spencer would be able to see your stance and body language through the glass window. you had been apologizing for something you couldn't even control. you would narrow your brows the way you only did when you were being yelled at. you bit your lip the way you did when you were being made to feel guilty.
he was guilt tripping you for something you couldn't even control.
when you had gotten back it wasn't any better. noah had been giving you the cold shoulder. he was defensive when you asked what was wrong.
and that was only 3 weeks into the relationship.
after being together for 2 months, you had gotten flowers delivered on your desk. you assumed they were from your boyfriend, reasonably so, and went to go thank him. spencer saw the shock in your eyes when you saw your boyfriend huddled in the corner with some new intern. spencer saw the look in your eye change from sadness to anger in the blink of his own.
you took a deep breath, and walked away from the situation, completely missing the way he tucked the intern's hair behind her ear as he leaned in to whisper something to make her giggle. when you got back to your desk you threw the flowers in the garbage can, not even bothering to read the note.
it was pretty indirect, but looking into it he realized it was an issue that should've been addressed. every time the team would go out together, everyone was clearly invited. you would always decline because 'noah wanted to take me out tonight' or 'noah said he needs me, so i'll have to rain check'.
it wasn't because you were a bad person, the opposite actually. it was because noah was taking advantage of your kindness.
because any time you needed him, 'noah's out with the boys' or 'noah had to work late' or, here's a kicker, 'noah had a hard time at work'. as if you don't have a hard time looking at dead bodies while he just has to write up reports.
even when you got injured during a case, shot in the shoulder, noah seemed as though he couldn't have cared less. he wouldn't even go to your apartment to visit you while you were in recovery because 'noah didn't have time to visit'.
spencer could even recall when you went out with the girls one night, spencer being the designated driver, that you had told them how 'noah didn't want you to dress too provocatively so you had to wear something more modest'.
now, spencer doesn't care all to much about what you wear because, frankly, it's none of his business. but now that he heard how noah cared oh-so-much, he decided to wrack his brain for the 'provocative' outfits you've worn. there was not a single one that anyone should make a comment about. you looked stunning no matter what you wore, so you'd grab any man's attention no matter the clothing on your body.
but spencer? he made sure to never be that much of an asshole to you. he made sure to make up for him being an asshole.
he would grab you some morning coffee like you always had before you had a boyfriend. he would make sure to tell you that you looked lovely when you were able to go out with the team. he would visit you when you injured yourself and were lonely, he even stayed back for a few days with you to help you get through it.
hell, he was the one to get you the flowers. you had been having a rough week and spencer thought it might cheer you up. he had gifted you a bouquet of 12, blue chiffon flowers because those were your favorite.
but this was his breaking point. you had come to his apartment, once again in the middle of the night, talking about noah fucking miller cheating on you.
he had done it once before when he was 'out with the boys' you decided to stop by when he said he'd be back, wanting to just be the amazing girlfriend that you are. so when you walk in and hear your boyfriend moaning along with another woman that isn't you, you immediately run back out. you run back out and drive all the way to spencer's.  
and here you are again. spencer wasn't mad at you, it was noah he was mad at. he couldn't believe what he was hearing.
spencer had always liked you, no, he's always loved you. everything about you. how could he not? you're perfect.
but loving you how he does and seeing you being used as a toy to fuck for a certain noah miller not only made his heart ache but also made his blood boil.
spencer wasn't an idiot. he had heard the way the old morgan had referred to women. the thing is, noah is way more of a fuckboy than the old morgan ever was. and that scared spencer to pieces. he knew that you would only be missing out on team outings just to get fucked by a douchebag. he knew that the only reason said douchebag wouldn't visit you was because you couldn't fuck. he knew that the reason said douchebag was cornering that intern was to fuck her, too.
so when you arrived at spencer's place, this time you weren't crying. you were furious. you were angry and upset, as was spencer.
"he did it again, spence," you breathed out as you paced across his living room floor. "i was supposed to meet him in a few hours but i was going to surprise him and i caught him with another tramp! i didn't even confront him. i just- i just left!"
"cheated? noah?" he asked as if he didn't believe it at first, not wanting to seem like as much of a dick as noah.
"yes! cheated. god! i am so ANGRY!" you ran your hand through your hair, a grunt leaving your mouth. "and... and frustrated! and... UGH!" you sighed aggressively.
"and what?" spencer asked as he stood up, slowly making his way to you. "what else?" he said, his hand now brushing that stubborn strand of hair behind your ear.
"i-i'm..." you trailed off, getting lost in his beautiful eyes.
if you were honest with yourself, you'd admit how much you loved spencer. but you thought he'd never love you like that. not since you helped him through jj getting married. he really thought she was it for him, at least that's what you'd come to think he believed. over the years you had grown so much closer and grown such an attraction for each other that the other person knew about. it was ironic, truly.
"say it, y/n," spencer leaned over you, his lips ghosting over yours. "i need to hear you say it."
"god, just kiss me," you said, your hands flying to the back of his hair to push his mouth to yours.
there was no hesitation from spencer to give you everything he had. his hand on the side of your face remained there as his other hand drifted to your waist to pull you closer to his body. your tongues met fervently with covetous, passion, and longing yet with just gentle firmness that felt protecting and as if it was how everything was supposed to be.
"please, spencer," you quietly whispered once you unlatched from one another.
"please what, princess," he asked, his hand running through your hair.
"i just... i need you," she pleaded with him, her hands still tugging gently on his hair. "please," you put your foreheads together, breathing in each others air as you silently begged him to help you in any way that he could.
"i'd do anything for you," he whispered so delicately as if the entire team were standing right beside you. "you know i'd do anything for you."
"then do something," you demanded.
spencer took action by kissing you just as intensely as before, this time his hands went to your ass. he grabbed your thighs to signal for you to jump, once you did you wrapped your legs around his torso as he carried you into his bedroom. he set you down just in front of the bed before you began to undo his shirt, him returning the favor by undoing yours.
"god, i've wanted you for so long," he growled, nipping gently at your earlobe as he laid you back on the bed. "lift your hips," he ordered, you obeyed his every command. you always would. "good girl," he praised as he ran his hands down your now bare waist.
"please," you begged, your hips bucking up to get any source of friction. "spencer..." you trailed off.
"i know, princess. i know," he said before climbing on top of you, connecting your lips with his once again, this time much more eager than before if that were possible.
as you arched your back, he took the opportunity to unclasp the hook on your bra. you shrugged it off your shoulders to allow him to throw the bra somewhere else in his room. he finally took a breath, removing his lips from yours to admire the view in front of him.
"god, you're so beautiful," he growled before placing gentle but eager kisses along the tops of your breasts, massaging the one his mouth wasn't on.
he pressed his knee between your legs, allowing you to buck your hips up to get that release you wanted so bad. you whined as he took your nipple in his mouth, his tongue flicking past it rapidly as he occasionally nibbled on it gently.
"spen-spencer," you ran your hands through his hair, tugging gently on the roots.
"mmm," he sat his head up, trailed kisses up your throat. "god, i love you so much."
"i-i love you," you moaned, pulling his head up to connect your lips together. "i love you so so much."
"i'm so glad to hear that," he huffed a sigh of relief. "because otherwise it'd be awkward when i did this," he began trailing kisses down your body, leading down towards your center. "i'll show you what it's like to be with a man that actually loves and respects you, yea? show you what it feels like to actually be pleased by a man? what it's like to be with a real man?" he teased.
his fingers trailed around your entrance, gathering your arousal that'd been building for what felt like ages. he pressed gentle kisses around your pussy before finally connecting his lips with your clit, a low groan emitting from your body because of the contact.
"yes, please," you shot your head back, relishing in the feeling of the direct skin contact.
"hey," spencer slapped your thigh, your head shot back up to see him between your legs, a truly beautiful sight that you'd never get tired of. "eyes on me," he demanded before going back down on you, not breaking eye contact as he brought out sounds from you that you weren't even sure you could make. "talk to me, princess. let me know how it feels."
"fe-feels so good," you sighed, taking your breasts in your hands and massaging them. "i-i can-can't even think," you stuttered out, too caught up in the pleasure to form a coherent sentence.
you had felt so good as he sucked on your clit, succeeding in bringing you closer to the edge than noah ever has, but when he inserted two fingers into your entrance...
"oh my fuck!" your hands shot down to grab onto his locks, pushing him further into your body, a low groan leaving him.
his fingers didn't stop their work. he curled them at just the right spot, sending you flying over the edge. spencer used his free hand to grab onto your thigh to keep them from closing in completely on his head, still working you through your high. he placed a kiss on your clit once more before he brought his head up to you, connecting your lips passionately.
"could noah ever make you come like that? huh? could he make you feel so good you could barely even think?" he grabbed your chin in his hands, holding it in place to look at him as you shook your head the best you could. "no?"
"mm-mm," you tried to shake your head 'no' once more.
"did you think of him while i was going down on you? were you thinking about how he fucked that little tramp?" he asked harshly, you shook your head 'no' again. "oh, what were you thinking, princess?" he finally released your face so you could speak.
"ab-about how well you know my body. about how, how good you looked between my legs. about how much i love you," you replied quickly, knowing exactly what to say.
"right answer," he connected your lips once more. "what do you want, love?" he asked, peppering soft kisses along your jaw where his hands once held your throat firmly.
"you. i-i want you in-inside me," you swallowed, your hand finding his and pulling it up to your lips to press a kiss to it, then another, then another, then another. "please, doctor?" you used your best puppy dog eyes you knew he couldn't resist.
"god, call me that again," he rasped lowly.
"what... doctor?" you took his hand and started sucking on his fingers, letting them slip in and out slowly and then moving onto the next.
"fuck, yes," he growled as he pressed another kiss to your lips before lining himself up at your center. "are you sure, princess?" he traced your jaw with the fingers you were previously sucking on.
"yes, sir," you nodded. "i'm sure."
you felt him slowly push inside of you slowly to allow you to adjust to his size. you had your suspicions of how big he was, but feeling him inside of you made it all much more real.
"fuck, you're so tight," he moaned into your ear quietly as he slowly pulled back out, going in just as slow.
"sp-spence-"
"wrong," he slapped your face gently, a whimper leaving your lips before he grasped your face to make you look him in the eyes.
"doc-doctor," you corrected yourself.
"good girl," he said, feeling your pussy clench from the praise. "oh you like that?" he felt it again. "maybe you just like hearing me talk, yea?" his pace began picking up slowly. "you like hearing how this pussy makes me feel? how tight... and warm... and wet it is?"
"u--uh huh," you nodded your head the best you could as he began thrusting much more rapid, hitting that special spot inside of you with each movement.
"it seems like you haven't felt this good in a long time huh? haven't had your pussy pounded like this in a while?" he asked as he was catching his breath.
"ne-never, doctor," you confirmed, hands reaching around his back and dragging your nails down, surely leaving scratch marks all down them.
"fuck," he growled. "noah never made you feel this good princess? never made you forget how to speak in sentences? never knew how to get you going like this?"
"n-no, no! never! god, never!" you cried as you pulled his body even closer to you. "i-i'm close, please!"
"you wanna come all over my dick, yea? you want to show me how much your pussy loves it when a real man fucks it?"
that was it to let that spring burst inside of you, parts flying everywhere. you cried his name as he worked you through your orgasm, holding onto his shoulders and hair to keep you grounded.
"cum inside me, please," you begged. "fi-fill me up."
"fuck, whatever you want, princess," he kept pounding into you at a rapid pace. "god, i'm gonna come inside you, and send you back to that scumbag of a boyfriend so he can see that you're mine now. so he can see what happens when his girlfriend is mistreated and fucked by someone who knows what they're doing, yea?"
"yea, yea!" you whined, nails digging back into his skin as he released his load into you, thrusting it gently back inside after.
"god, i love you so much," he moaned into your ear, pressing a kiss to your cheek by your ear.
"i love you," you replied, stroking his hair to help him come down, him still inside of you. he began thrusting inside of you once again.
"don't want any of it to spill out before you get to him," he felt you clench around him one more time. "you're very responsive, princess. i like that about you."
"it-it's just you, spence. it's always been you," you pulled him in for another kiss.
this one was full of passion but not the kind of eagerness. it was full of desire and longing, pent up emotions flowing out into one another fluidly.
"now let me go see my soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend," you huffed as he pulled out of you, wincing from the overstimulation. "i'll see you later?"
"i'll see you later," he pressed a kiss to your forehead before helping you gather your clothes.
driving back to his apartment, you felt rather giddy with yourself. should you have felt bad? absolutely not. he's a manipulative asshole who's used you for sex on numerous occasions, so he deserved the bittersweet irony of what was coming to him.
*get it, coming to him? lol i'm sorry i had to :)*
you knocked on the door softly, greeted by a rather chipper noah who grabbed your face as soon as he saw you, connecting your lips. his kiss was nothing like spencer's. his lips weren't as soft and tentative. they weren't plump and round, they were harsh and rough and unpleasant.
he quickly led you to the bedroom, not to your surprise. he sat down on the bed, you straddled his hips, acting as if it were spencer instead - which was pretty hard to do after knowing what he was like in the sack.
you felt his boner through his pants quickly after you got on top of him. then when he flipped you over and pulled your pants and underwear down, he was met with a surprise.
"someone's excited to see me," he chuckled before licking a thick stripe from your slit to clit, very aggressive to where it almost hurt to have the pressure. "god you taste so good, doll."
he continued at this for a while, inserting his tongue to your hole very once in a while and licking up yours and spencer's arousal with it. you faked your moans and whimpers as his ministrations became more eager, not really getting you anywhere.
after he was finished with your turn - no, he didn't even make you cum - he laid back on the bed as if he were waiting for you to get on top of him again.
"actually," you stood up from the bed, pulling up your clothes with you. "i'm done with this. we're over."
you watched his face as he took in the information just released to him. it changed from surprised and shocked, to confused, to disgusted, to angry and frustrated.
"what the fuck?" he sat up from the bed, a disgruntled look on his face. "you wait until after you cum to tell me this?" he walked over to you, arms flailing in the air.
"yea. i did. and by the way, i didn't cum," you informed him. "that's something you've never really been good at making me do. although i'm not sure how you've been able to convince me to do anything with the way you treat me."
"what do you mean? i'm a good gu-"
"shut up for one second, please," you rolled your eyes, running your hand through your hair. "i know you've cheated on me numerable times. i stayed because i thought that maybe there was a reason, but i've come to realize that i was just... settling with you," you shrugged.
"you've treated me like crap since this 'relationship' started and i'm tired of it. i know someone who not only treats me with respect and kindness, but can also actually make me cum. shocker," you chuckled.
"who is this asshole? what the hell-"
"i wasn't finished, sweetie," you spat out viciously. "he's not an asshole. you're the asshole. you're the one that's getting dumped. so this is goodbye," you turned around to walk out of his room before leaving him with one more thought. "how did his cum taste with mine?" you tilted your head innocently, smiling at his shocked face as he realized what you meant before walking out.
and you were never more glad that you didn't have to go back to him anymore.
taglist:
@muffin-cup​ @greenprisca​ @averyhotchner​ 
1K notes · View notes
vannybarber · 4 years ago
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Put Some Respect On My Name!
Summary: As a wife and a mother to the kids of this asshole, respect is the one thing you better be recieving from him...after some good 🍆 of course. That's number one right there.😏
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Ransom Drysdale x Black Reader
BIG ASS PLOT
Words: 5.3k
Warnings: Pregnant¡Reader, swearing, insults, angst, mentions of cheating, SMUT, breeding kink, spanking, oral (female receiving), praise kink, unprotected sex, mentions of religion, threats of violence (nothing extreme).
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So here your are. Sitting on you and Ransom's shared California King bed looking at his friend, Derek's Instagram story, disappointed and angry. But mostly angry. Some nasty ass trick is sitting on your baby daddy's lap. Her loppy floppy tits out with a drink in hand and him drinking a Moscato, the one beverage he loved to order everytime he went out.
Last year for New Year's, you had to stop him from ordering more or else you were going to be cleaning him up after puking everywhere at midnight instead of getting a kiss to start off another year.
Your two year old daughter was in her playroom across the hall making a mess with her toys. Usually you'd be down there playing with her but your swollen stomach done prohibited you from doing a lot of things now. But it most definitely ain't stop you from getting what you want from Ransom every day and night. Nothing could ever stop you guys from getting yo freak on. Nothing.
Hugh Ransom Drysdale is most definitely an asshole and you're not gonna sit here and lie, acting like he completely changed when you guys came together. That boy still has his moments, but of course, it would be a chilly ass day in hell before you sit there and take his bullshit. He been learned that.
At this point ,you were thinking of ways to get on his ass about it when he comes home. Should you get the bat and wait at the door on some Beyonce shit ? Or put some bleach in his Fruit Loops like Cardi the next day ? Those sounded a lot better than what you decided to do. You were gonna wait till he got back home and calmly confront him on it, regardless of what your hormones wanted. 6 months pregnant and anger do not go together. You're WAAAAY more vulnerable and bound to do anything now. So you just watch your daughter brush her baby doll, hitting her on the head cause she won't sit still, rubbing your bump and wait for him to come home.
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You hear shuffling downstairs and keys hitting the bowl by the front door. His big head home now and you're beyond ready.
You check the time and it's 2:46 am. You been put your child to sleep hours ago. You were just watching Wild N' Out to pass the time, thinking of how you were gonna start off without making yourself even more mad. The baby nor you need any of that. You were internally praying he was gonna get his ass over here soon cause your ass knocked out for a little bit. You were sleepy as hell right now.
Hearing those expensive ass Chelsea boots hit the sleek stairs and up to the second floor, you woke the fuck up real quick. You stay quiet and watch him walk in your daughters room and check on her. You can see with the nightlight him smile and rub her brown cheek with the back of his forefinger, whispering inaudible words to her. Fuck him and his adorable ass.
He bends back up straight and walks out her room closing the door a little and make his way across the hall to your room. He sees you and your pregnant state in your white tube top and grey booty shorts. Simple yet the baddest bitch he's ever laid eyes on and ever will. He smiles while locking eyes with you and all you do is narrow yours back at him getting upset all over again, regardless of the sweet previous moment shared with your baby girl.
He gives you a 'what the hell ?' look and comes over to give you a kiss but you jerk your head back with the stank face and a 'boy move out my face' quietly leaving your mouth. Now he's REALLY confused.
"Mama, what's wrong with you?"
You look at him like he just asked you to get on your knees and bark like a dog.
"What's wrong with me? You really asking that?" raising your voice on the second question.
Technically, he has the right to ask, being that he doesn't know what you know. He probably doesn't even know that Derek was recording him and that broad. Nor does he know that you texted Derek to keep recording him so you know nothing escalates.
Call it what you want, but you know how your man is. He's immature and irresponsible as HELL. If something had popped off that really threatened y'all's relationship, you would've been in that bar with your child on your right hip, earphones in her ear and tablet in hand, cussing him and that girl out.
"You wanna tell me how your night went?" You tilt your head asking sweetly, with a drop of sarcasm. You truly are a petty ass piece of work. And you love it.
"Just get to the point Y/N. The fuck did I do this time ?" At this point he's now visibly annoyed. But you ain't care. This situation is on his part. Y'all could've had a nice night, fucking while Big City Greens playing in the background on the T.V. eventually waking your child up cause you loud as hell, but nooooo. That ain't happening now.
You grab your phone and open back up Instagram, Marta popping up on your feed with Harlan reading a book. You like it and search up Derek's @ then click his story. You flip through countless tabs until you see the man-child standing in front of you, on the screen. You motion him over to the bed.
"Come here, asswipe."
He rolls his eyes, but moves them feets anyway. You turn your phone to him and let the video play. You watched it about a thousand times so you know exactly when it ends. After it does you pull the phone back in your lap and give him a questioning look.
Sometimes it's hard to read his expressions and this was one. It was a mix of slight guilt and double the annoyance. He backs up and stands back at the end of the bed, arms crossed.
"Really? This why you're upset?"
You swear you almost slapped him. And this time you couldn't blame the hormones because it was gonna be ALL YOU. You take a deep breath and lean your back against the cushion headboard.
"I KNOW you did not just ask me that as if I ain't supposed to be bothered by the fact that my husband got some random woman on his lap while I'm at home with his daughter and his growing child."
You deadass don't believe him right now. He really pressing you as if he don't know how you get when you're angry, especially while pregnant.
"My feet hurt. I am TIRED. I can't even move for more than 5 minutes without getting sick and having to sit down. The you come at me with this bullshit" you continue. "What the hell is wrong with you ?"
He just deadpans you. And you stare at his ass right back. You not playing right now.
"Y/N, you never get upset when I go out with my buddies and get hammered." He's flapping his arms around raising his voice at every word.
"What is the big deal now? It's fucking late and you're doing all this right now. What the hell?"
You gather the strength and get out the bed to close the bedroom door cause you about to go AWF.
Getting back on the bed fully sitting up and supporting your own weight, you tie your butterfly braids up in ponytail.
"Listen, you raggedy shitball,"
It's about to go down. You adjust yourself, ready to release the wrath.
"I don't give a damn how late it is. You know better than to go out and let some bitch get close up on you like that. Were you even thinking about me or your kids while she was on you? The fuck was going through your mind? Oh wait, I forgot. You don't fucking think. You have to actually have a damn brain."
"Raggedy shitball? Real mature, babe. Real fucking mature." He says rolling his eyes, finally getting his shoes off and putting them under the chair were his scarf and coat are draped over.
You continue with your rant.
"Ironic for you to comment on maturity, Hugh."
Yep, that's right. You said it. You called him by his ugly ass first name. Linda and Richard must've been out they damn mind naming him that shit. He whipped his head around, any sense of expression just completely wiping from his face. Perfect. Just the reaction you wanted.
"Don't call me that." He stated, pure disgust in his words. To be honest, you don't even blame him. But like stated before, you petty as hell.
"Hugh, Hugh, Hugh. Your name is fucking Hugh" you say in a sing songy voice. Damn, it feels good to be a gangsta.
"You don't get to tell me what to do right now. And back to what I said before. Why you let that girl in your lap like that ?"
"It was completely harmless. We were just having fun. Like you said before, you aren't a jealous person. Stuff like that shouldn't even be affecting you like this." He gets on the bed beside you and your face tore back up again. He's really getting in this fucking bed beside you like nothing.
But he was right though. You aren't a jealous person. A girl can come up to him at a party and flirt right in your face, but you'd never be bothered. Cause at the end of the day, her ass is getting rejected and he's gonna be inside you later the same night. He's yours and you're his. Simple.
"Ransom, just because I'm not a jealous person doesn't mean I'm gonna keep my mouth if our relationship is threatened." This man is actually delusional.
"You never entertain other girls when I'm around and here you are with a girl on your lap and I'm not there to say or do nothing. And you know your shitty friends will just encourage it. "
At this point, you started to get really insecure. Maybe it's the hormones, maybe it's just your logic. But your mind started racing like NASCAR. What really happens when he's out and you're at home? He wouldn't put your marriage and family at risk over a bitch...right? He hasn't cheated on you, has he? These thoughts really weren't good for your right now.
But he must've read your expressions. You were zoned out and he knows you're an over thinker so he had to stop you real quick. He puts his large left hand over your thigh, rubbing it and his right around your ass, leaning his head against your arm, trying to get you to chill. It almost worked, him knowing you liked your thighs rubbed, especially in your state.
But you caught that shit right away. You moved out of his hold and turn your body completely towards him. And then you ask him.
"Have you ever cheated on me?"
He freezes, you swear for at least 2.4 milliseconds and whips his head around to look at you. You turn your head away, somewhat regretting you even asked. You know this fucker loved you and your family with everything. He even said in his vows he would give his all into you. And you believed him. But fuck that right now. You need to know.
"Are you GODDAMN serious right now?!"
Okay, you paused for two things; he used God's name in vain, which you HATED, due to you growing up religious. Even though you don't practice it very often, it still bothered you. And two, he yelled, completely disregarding the fact that your kid is across the hall sleeping.
You snap your head around, braids hitting your face with super saiyan speed and kick him in his hip.
"What the shit, Y/N?"
"First of all, you know how I feel about that fucking word. STOP USING IT. And two, your daughter is sleeping so you need to keep your damn voice down!"
He's rubbing his side with a distorted look, but you could care less. You were fed up. This imbecile wasn't showing you any respect and your weren't gonna wait for him to get it right.
"How the hell would you feel if I went out, sat on some random dude's lap and entertained him while you were at home with our kid? Matter a fact, I'll do one even better. How about while I'm PREGNANT with YOUR baby, that YOU put in me, I sit on him and letting him rub my belly?"
Ransom has a big ass breeding kink. When you told him you were pregnant he was ecstatic. The though of him knocking you up, his seed growing inside of you just gave him pure ecstacy. And don't even get started on when your bump started to form. He was fucking every chance he got. He was in a theme park and you were his favorite ride.
You know you were playing with fire, but that shit felt AMAZING. He was really feeling how you were feeling right now. Them veins were popping out his neck and his face was slightly turning red. Baby boy was LIVID.
"Y/N, cut that shit out. I'm not doing this with your ass tonight." He looked at you with these eyes you've only seen when his family pissed him off at those gatherings he dragged both of you to. Before you had your first child of course. You went to them less after your daughter's birth because he didn't want her around his shitty family. You completely understood.
"Nah, baby boy. Since you want to be so inconsiderate and a triple asshole tonight, you can lay here by yourself and bathe in it." You got your big ass out the bed after minutes of struggling. Grabbing your black Betty Boop pillow with her cute afro, your charger, phone and your Hot Cheetos out the night stand and slipped on your slides, you waddle across the room, heading into the guest bedroom.
You refuse to sleep in the same bed as him, especially since he refuses to admit he's in the wrong. If you stay in there, you're just going to get even more frustrated and you don't want to harm your baby.
"Y/N, baby. What are you doing? Come back in here" he called you from the bedroom.
You shut the door and lock it. You'll be damned if you're gonna come running back cause he aSkEd you to. You settle in the bed, plug your phone up, grab your chips and turn When They See Us on the T.V.
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Ransom just lays back on the bed in defeat. He didn't even make an effort to get you back in the room because you're stubborn as a mule. But he takes this time to go over what just happened.
He truly didn't think you would make a big deal. Like you said before, you're not a jealous person, so he didn't think he'd have to worry. Boy, was he all the way wrong. And you did have a point about you entertaining another man. That had his blood boiling. He gets at most irritated when you come with him to events, like the Oakley Country Club in Watertown and you're everyone's distraction.
It was your first appearance with him there and you being a sight to see, had all eyes on you and your body. Hell, even the women were checking you out, no envy or jealousy in sight. He knew then, he was gonna keep you close. You don't remember ever leaving his side that evening. He even volunteered to go into the bathroom with you. He didn't want to take a chance with the females either.
But in all seriousness, he couldn't bear the thought of you with another man. Especially now that you're married and have two kids together. But he really couldn't believe that you'd even suggest that he had been unfaithful to you. Your reasons were plausible, yes, but he was honestly...hurt. He knows what kind of guy he is comes off as, but he'd never intentionally ruin what you guys have built. You were the only one he truly let close.
He knew what he had to do, even though he dreaded it. He had to go apologize. He hates when you're upset with him. Absolutely hates it. Plus you were looking sexy as hell tonight and he need some of that round brown ASAP, no rocky.
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Ransom got up and opened the door, making his way down the hall to the guest bedroom, but not before checking his baby's room. She was still fast asleep, little snores leaving her body. Exiting her room, he knew your door would be locked but tried to open it anyway. When it didn't budge, he knocked a couple of times. But you was knocked out.
Then he remembered. Lifting his hand to the top of the door frame, he searched for the thin key that unlocked the bedroom doors. Once he felt it, he grabbed it and inserted it in the door knob. Click. He pushed the door open and looked around to see the T.V. screen on, but paused, and you lying on your side with the Cheeto bag still open like a damn fool.
He shut the door quietly and made his way around the bed. He closed the loud ass bag, which caused you to stir and reposition your legs. He set the bag on the nightstand and crawled into the bed with you. He stared at you for a moment. Looking at your full lips and your wide nose.
Your afrocentric features were always so mesmerizing to him because they were different from all the other women. They were unique and he understood why you took so much pride in them. You had the damn right, especially looking that good. You were never afraid to embrace them. No person of color should ever be afraid to. Ever.
After what felt like an hour of weird ass staring, Ransom started to shake your arm, trying to wake you. You're a heavy ass sleeper, so it took him a while. You opened your eyes, squinting trying to figure what the fuck just woke your ass up. Feeling a dip in the bed and a presence next to you, Ransom comes into sight.
Even though this man is finer than a MOTHERFUCKER, you still turned your nose up when you looked at him. Your ass was still mad and it was ridiculous. Understandable, but ridiculous as hell. You could only imagine what he wanted now. You roll your eyes.
"Listen, I know you're still pissed at me and whatever, but I just came in here to.... apologize."
He averted his gaze to the T.V. You know how difficult it is for your baby to apologize for anything because even though he clearly in the wrong, he will never ever accept it nor admit it. And damn sure never apologize.
"I realize how you felt when you saw that video", he continued. "I would be even more pissed if you were the one in someone else's lap and I couldn't kick their ass as soon as I saw it."
You chuckled a little bit because it's true. He would be angry as shit. Although, you'd never be in that position because you love and respect him too much. But you let him finish before you spoke.
"With that being said, I'm sorry for my actions. Believe it or not, I'm still getting adjusted to being a husband and a father. I'm still struggling to give up my old habits and the shit I'm so used to doing. It's not easy, baby."
You grab is strong jaw and make him face you. He hasn't made eye contact with you this entire time. You almost felt bad, but he needed to understand. Understand where you were coming from and understand how it made you feel.
"Ransom, I'm not asking you to completely change who you are. I just want to know that you're in this for good. Because you can't turn back now. We've come too damn far. And I'll be damned if you decide to give up your responsibilities. Your ass gon' be grass."
He smiled a teeny bit, because what can you say? You're a natural born comedian. You can turn any situation in to some funny ass shit. But you get back to your point.
"I want you to be able to go out and have fun, but also come back and be a husband and a father. I value my independence just as much as you, so I get it. Just remember what you have. Don't fuck it up for some pussy, alright? That's all I'm saying."
You look him in his sea blue eyes. Damn, them thangs are hypnotic as hell. But you search for something that tells you he understands. That's all you fucking want. Him to understand. But you definitely got your answer.
Just as you were about to ask him, he shoots his face towards you and attacks your mouth like a damn wild ass pig. You were thrown all the way off, but you checked back into reality and kissed him back. You guys had this amazing ass way of getting in sync when you kissed. No matter who initiates it, you flow amazingly.
After a few mintues of saliva attack, you pull away tryna breathe cause he was about to take all your fucking oxygen. He laughs at the look on your face. You end up cracking up too. You can't help it. And he knows it.
"I completely understand, mama. I've definitely taken this into consideration. I learned my lesson." He smiles down at you. Internally you're proud as fuck because it's like you raised a bad ass kid into a well behaved one. The power your ass holds is amazing.
Then you look at the door trying to figure out how the hell he got in the room. "The key." You nod in realization. He rubs your thigh again, and this time, you don't stop him. Instead he stops himself. You look at him confused as fuck.
"But I'm gonna let you sleep in here, since you seem to be so cozy." He was messing with you. Fuck him. He gets up off the bed and head towards the door, but not before looking back to catch your reaction. You had a 'get your ass back over here' look on your face. But he just smirked. That signature smirk.
"What's wrong, sweetheart?" He really out here testing you right now. The balls on this motherfucker...
"Ransom, get your ass over here and give me what I want." You look down at his crotch, imagining him without his wool Reiss pants. He follows your eyes, still holding that smirk, but not forgetting to widen it. You lusting after his fLeSh turned him on bad. And it felt so good.
You already know you're to hard to resist. Everyone loves chocolate. Even Ransom's lactose intolerant ass.
You start to rub your belly, purposely drawing his attention, really making him turned on for you. You can feel that that tropical rain storm in your Fenty underwear.
And that boy was ready to start swimming. He expediTiously got back on the bed and in between your legs. You give him that look and that's all he needed. Connecting your lips to his and moving them in perfect sync like always, he starts rubbing up and down the side of your full belly.
"So fucking perfect and all of it's for me."
You pause.
"And who said all of this was for you, Mr. Drysdale?"
Not amused by your comment, he slaps your ass louder than a bitch and you shut your ass up real quick. Not before letting out a little giggle though.
He lifts your heavy ass and pulls the tube top over your head, letting your swole breasteses fall into position. Your areolas widened since having your daughter and Ransom LIVED for it. You were definitely enjoying them massages and those lips treatments he gave you when they were sore, just like now.
He starts kneading the left breast and continues to make out with your face like an animal. His left arm is holding your ass up. He eventually lays you back down, knowing damn well his ass is tired of holding you. You ain't blaming him either.
He hooks his lips on the nipple of the same breast, twirling his deadly tongue all around it. You moan with your head thrown back cause it feels good as hell. He lets go and replaces his mouth with his hands and twirls the nipple with his mouth on the other.
All you could do was mumble cuss words and grab his hair. He was really fucking you up and the real fucking didn't even start yet.
Trailing kisses all the way down your beautiful bump, down all the stretch marks till he reaches your shorts. He wasted no time getting them off and disposing them on the clean floor. Whatever he throw on the floor HE'S picking that shit up, not you. You'll make sure of that.
He looks directly at your covered pussy with excitement in his eyes. More excited than you were, if that's even possible. He takes his thick index finger and rubs you through your panties, completely soaking them. You just watch him, lust dialating your pupils.
He yanks them off, almost taking you off the damn bed at the same time, so you had to re-adjust yourself. He spreads your legs on their sides of his wide shoulders and licks from your core to the hood that covered your clit. You jerked a little cause you were in your second trimester, the horny trimester. You were 🌃 sensitive 🌃.
Then his annoying ass starts lapping in circles in super saiyan speed. You cry out and grab your left breast, squeezing and rubbing it. He stretches his left hand out and takes the right one, doing the same thing. Your back was continuously arching. You know your baby was fed up.
After a couple of more laps, your body finally can't take anymore and you cum all over his mouth. He has the audacity to keep going, even when your clit is hypersensitive, making you literally whimper, so you have to slap his head to get him to stop.
He pulls away with that stupid famous smirk.
"All that shit you're always talking, but you couldn't take a little sensitivity?" He teases you. But that's alright, cause you gon' remember that next time you're on your knees for him. When he comes, you not taking your mouth off him until you feel like it.
"Just fuck me already before I change my mind." You don't know why you even said that shit. He can tease you all you want. You'll never not have your legs or mouth open, ready for him to stick his dick wherever he feels.
He just chuckles, cause he knows that too.
Taking your body, he flips you on your left side and settles behind you, dick right against your ass. Its one of your favorite positions because he could hit your sweet spot perfectly this way. And he could rub your bump at the same time. Beneficial for the both of your greedy asses.
He was taking way to long so you grab his dick and line it up with your pussy and push the tip in slowly, playing with your own arousal. Ransom just watched. He loved seeing you desperate for his stupid ass, but you gave zero fucks at the moment.
Finally you slip his huge ass girth inside you and you moan out loud as hell. You really just be turned on by anything at this point. He then takes back the lead and pushes further till he bottoms out inside you. He's heavily breathing his hot ass breath on your neck like a weirdo, but fuck it.
Once both of you are adjusted, he starts moving in and out of you. The position made your walls hella tighter and he was already hitting your spot. His tight arm is wrapped around your stomach now. You constantly moan his name and he's just encouraging it.
"Ransom, fuck, baby just like that"
"You love when I fuck you like this, don't you pretty girl?"
You hated when he called you "pretty girl, sweet girl, or good girl" because you become a straight whore for him right away. He's such an asshole.
"Yes, Daddy- please don't stop"
"Tell me how bad you want it baby"
There he go with these fucking games. Always wanting to hear you beg.
"I want it so bad, Daddy ! pleASe give it to mE"
Happy Ransom?
He starts to pick up the pace and you feel the pleasure in your toes. It just travel from there all around your body and you can't say anything but "don't stop" and moan uncontrollably.
You start getting close and he can tell by the way you pick up the moans. So he starts going faster. But never forgetting to add a little nasty dialogue.
"I can feel you ready to come sweet girl. Keep clenching around me baby" That shit just made you even more whore-knee. If you weren't already pregnant, he was definitely gonna put a baby in you that night.
"Baby I'm close- fill me up Ransom please "
You're begging for this man to cum inside you, but he always wanna play a damn game.
"Hmmm do you truly deserve to cum baby? I don't know if you do.."
You wanted to hit him so bad, but he wouldn't let you come if you did. So you go along with it.
"Yes Daddy I'll do anything- Please just let me cum !" You screamed.
At this point you were loud as 🌃fuck🌃 .
After more begging he finally let you come.
"Oh shit Ransom- FUCK" You come all over his dick and shortly after, he came right behind you. Filling you up just like you wanted. He slumped against your back and you lowered your shaky leg.
"You always take me so well baby girl." He starts kissing your neck. You could literally hear that loppy ass smile he has on his face everytime y'all get done. But you get all tingly inside because you love when he praises you. Makes you feel proud of yourself.
"Well there's not much to take so...it's whatever." What are you without a teasing remark after every other sentence? But he always has a clapback.
"Its funny you say that because the other day you were practically in tears because my dick was "too much for one woman to take" and that I was practically torturing you." At this point you're turned over facing him grinning like a Cheshire cat and him smiling right back at you.
"Oh shut the fuck up, with your annoying ass." You snap back at him playfully, rolling your eyes.
"You love me, my chocolate bunny." He let's out an audible yelp when you kick him in his leg. You hate when he calls you that. "Cut it out Ransom, or you're not touching me for a week."
There you go again saying the dumb shit. You both know that YOU could never go through with that.
"Fine by me", he states unphased. Cause he knows you could never.
You roll your eyes for the 50thousanth time.
"You're lucky I love your ass."
"I love you too pretty girl" he winks.
Just as you were about to get up, you hear something jiggle the doorknob and someone huffing and puffing outside the door. That little girl over here jumping up and down tryna to open the damn door. You're literally hollering at her struggle. Truly sick in the fucking head.
"Mama! Where Papa ?" Ransom grins as he throws you his blue sweater so you can cover up and gets up to let your baby girl in.
You truly cannot stand this guy.
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This all came to me so fast 😭 I hope y'all like it lmaoo
753 notes · View notes
hollowedwing · 4 years ago
Text
Isekai-ed into Hawk's Life
Hawks x gn!winged!Reader
Warnings: ⚠️ Death!(at very beginning, it is an isekai), mentions of death throughout, some angst(??maybe not yet??), slight cursing
THIS WILL NOT FOLLOW A SPECIFIC TIMELINE IN THE MANGA
(so sorry i just, love, love, the idea of having wings)
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(this is all my art, it is on IG, im just too embarrassed for people who know me irl to potentially find this xD Even though none of them have tumblr 👀 if you somehow recognize it...props to you?)
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tbh, I can’t decide if I want this to have more than 1 part. 
Word count: ~1,800
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You were on your way home from a long evening at your part time job. Before that you had already taken 2 finals that morning too.
You dragged your feet, exhausted, as you headed towards the crosswalk. Stopping at the edge as the traffic light turned green, you decided to pull out your phone and decided to watch a speed paint from your favorite artist who recently released a new video.
It just so happened it was a Hawks speed paint 👀
The light turned red and you slipped your phone into your pocket as your started to make your way across the street
little did you know this would be the last time you'd cross the street
A wild driver came barreling down the road, no regards for civilians or traffic lights, probably drunk or high or just someone out for blood.
You stood there like a deer caught in headlights as your life flashes before your eyes
You can barely comprehend what's happening as you felt pain engulf your body and suddenly you were unconscious
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Keigo tiredly stumbled into his large apartment, kicking off his shoes and shrugging his jacket off by the door
He wants nothing more than to just flop down and pass out. The HPSC has been giving him hell lately about god knows what.
He let out a long sigh and headed towards the bathroom to do his nightly routine
As he finishes up, he drags his feet towards his bed and flops down face first into the comfort of his pillow and sheets
Keigo falls asleep almost instantly after getting into a comfortable position, worn out from a long day of work
What he wasn't expecting was a loud "thud!" coming from the main room. He jolts up from his bed, feathers ready to attack.
*******
Reader's pov(?)
*******
You groaned as you hit the floor. Your head was spinning and it feels like a truck just hit you
oh wait...
You suddenly became more alert, looking around in a panic, expecting to either be on the road and injured or in a hospital of sorts. What you didn't expect was a wooden floor inside of a random apartment.
You felt around your body for any signs of injury, but all you found were a set of wings on your back- wings?? Hold up. Why did you feel wings what kind of sick joke was this?
Your thoughts were racing as your breathing picked up. What was happening? Didn't you just get hit by a vehicle? Why are there wings in your back? Where are you even?
Feeling around in your pockets, you found your phone and whipped it out, trying for anything. You turned it on, the harsh light of it illuminating your face, you tried to send a text to your best friend, but alas, it wouldn't go through. Actually nothing on your phone seemed to work. You checked your location settings, for some reason it said Musutafu, Japan.
Wasn't....Wasn't that the location that most of Boku no Hero Academia took place?? This can't be right, this has to be a dream right? There's no way that you could have actually ended up here unless...
Then it hit you.
You read your fair share of isekai series back when you were alive in your realm. Mostly manhwas of characters getting reborn into another person's body, but, never actually reincarnating as yourself into another world.
That was the only thing you could think of. You must have been reincarnated into the Boku no Hero Academia world. Except as yourself.
In all honesty, this is not how you thought you'd go out. You didn't know what to expect after death, but this definitely wasn't it. After all, this was a fictional setting, wasn't it?
Well, not anymore because now you're living in it! Smh.
That would also probably explain the wings on your back. This was you now. You have a bird quirk.
Now, all you have to do, is figure out where the heck you are.
Just as you are about to stand up, feathers zip towards you, pinning you to the ground
You hear footsteps begin to come towards you. You don't know if you should be scared for your life considering you've already died once or ecstatic because, you knew for a fact, this could be none other than Hawks' apartment.
The winged hero finally emerges and stares down at you, crossing his arms over his chest.
He says in a low, gravely voice from sleep, "Who are you, and how did you get into my home?" You stare back up at him and nervously chuckle.
"I'm not sure you'd believe me if I told you." You nervously sigh out.
"Try me." He demands, sounding a little more irritated now. You sigh in defeat and start to explain your situation.
"Do...do you know what an isekai is?" You said sheepishly while turning your gaze away from his. He kind of gave you a confused head tilt and just a vibe that said “No”. You sigh again and explain it to the best of your ability. Hawks becomes more and more interested and confused as you talk, but nods a long slowly. 
“So...you were reborn here, but as yourself? Wait- does that mean you died before!?” He asked, disbelief and fear ran through his eyes. You looked at him in bitter amusement.
“Apparently I did. The last thing I remember of my world was getting hit by some truck or car. The dude clearly did not know how to drive. I had the right of way I was pretty sure at least. I mean, the light was red, usually that means pedestrians can cross the street? And plus he was going wayyy over the speed limit,” you begin to ramble on, the reality of actually dying setting into you. Hawks noticed the panic beginning to set into you and released you from his feathers. He crouched down next to you and grabbed your shoulders gently.
"Hey, hey, hey, look at me, you're ok now, right? You're here, and not dying in the middle of the street still. You're here. In Musutafu," he said trying to calm you back to reality. Well, what was your new reality. Your mind was racing. Trying to put together a coherent thought. 
You look up to him, with a panicked look still in your eyes, thoughts started to come out of your mouth as your brain was trying to catch up with the situation. "I'm... I'm in Boku no Hero Academia and, and you’re Keigo... standing... right in front of me..I have wings. I have wings? Jeezus I have fucking wings. And I’m dead in my own world. I don’t know anyone, well, wait, technically, I do know people, just-Oh gods! I’m so sorry, that name slipped out! I- I, I’m really sorry Hawks." Even in your wild state, you noticed Hawks tense up at the sound of being called Keigo by a total stranger, and were able to get out an apology. That was progress? You were slowly coming back to reality.
Hawks froze up a bit at the sound of hearing his real name mentioned. At first he wasn't sure if he believed your tale of the isekai situation, but after this he might have to reconsider it. He opted to shake off that weird feeling for now and focus on different matters. 
" I-I don't know what I'm supposed to do now? I have nowhere to go or to stay. I'm in a whole different freaking universe! My phone doesn't even hardly work here. And I have a pair of wings on my back!" You puffed them out angrily. Hawks glanced behind you and his eyes widened a little. You in fact, did have a set of bird wings. Kind of owl like wings. Not near as big as Hawks', but definitely big enough to fly you around.
Before Hawks could process the words coming out of his mouth, he was already asking you, "Would you maybe like to stay with me? I can help with your quirk too." He glanced away awkwardly. You looked towards him in disbelief.
"Dude, are you sure? We literally just met like 10 minutes ago? I mean, I'm all for it, I have nowhere else to turn to, but if you really really don't want me here, I will politely step out of your life." You so badly wanted to accept his offer on the spot, but being the considerate, mostly sensible human you were, you gave him the option to back out. Hawks shook his head.
"No, no, it's alright. You can crash here. Uh- I mean- stay here! Sorry!" You giggled at his comment.
"Well thank you very much!"
"It's all good. I have a spare bedroom you can occupy for the time being. I'll give you some clothes to sleep in that'll hopefully fit. Accidentally bought a couple things in the wrong size without looking. " (a/n: just...just assume its your size, or oversized, whatever's comfy idk) He jumped up and headed towards his room to grab you the clothes. You still sat on the floor. Still amazed at everything that was occurring.
Hawks walked back into the room and tossed you the clothes. "Hey uh, you know, you can get up now, sorry for holding you down earlier.."
You blushed and scrambled to stand up, "Oh no! It's ok! I understand. This would definitely warrant that kind of action. Some random stranger crashes into your apartment at like 1am. I completely understand. Honest."
He let out a small laugh and wearily brushed his fingers through his hair. The adrenaline of everything finally wearing off. He could feel the tiredness setting into his aching muscles again. “Ah, well, I’m going to head to bed now. The room is down the hall at the very end that you can stay in. I’ll take you out training tomorrow evening if that’s alright?”
You gave a nod of understanding and followed him down the hallway. “Goodnight Hawks,” you sang as he walked into his bedroom. He gave a hum of acknowledgment and closed his door. 
Making it into what was now your room, you changed out of your clothes so fast, eager to rid yourself of the past hours events. 
Not gonna lie, you could not figure out how to properly get your new wings into the shirt, even with the holes and snaps in the back. Your mind was too exhausted to even process this new skill. So you ended up going to bed without the shirt on and just settled for putting the sweatpants on. 
You figured it’d be good to just pass out asap. You were sure if you tried to recount the recent events, you’d spiral into a panicked mess. 
You shut your eyes tightly, willing yourself to sleep, trying to only think of positive outcomes for the future. But to be honest, you didn’t know enough about anything in this realm to think rationally about anything good. 
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I prooobably didn’t proofread this as much as I should have
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daredevil-1910 · 2 years ago
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On a Far Away Land
I know i promised a lot of chapter, and ive been overthinking most of them but i guess ill just post them.
I will be aging up the characters, Right now this OC is about Lucy's age, which is 18, ill let all of you do the math.
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13 years ago.... 
"Goodbye Elijah, I will be coming back as soon as I can, be good to Mrs. Peterson, ok?" I nodded at my mother enthusiastically knowing she was going to bring sweets when she came back.  
She always did it, when she went into town, she would bring me sweets for being good with Mrs. Peterson
"Eli, I keep forgetting what your age was again" I stuck out my hand with four fingers sticking outward.
"How many is that sweetie?" She always asked me this question. And I always answered the same thing.
"I'm four Mrs. Peterson" I quickly answered her question and was back to playing with my toys. Boy I can't wait till momma gets back.
The next day
Ring ring
That's the telephone, Mrs. Peterson answered from the kitchen.
"Yes, this is her, oh my, oh no, yes, he's here, what am I supposed to do with him? I can't really... alright I’ll do it" Mrs. Peterson looks real worried I wonder what happened.
Present day
My mother had died, some men had robbed and shot her. Left her for dead. Her body was found that same day a few hours later, apparently, she hadn't even made it to town.
I stayed with Mrs. Peterson. She took care of me and comforted me when days got hard.
But unfortunately, she got sick and died when I was 11 years old.
I'm 17 now, not really grown. But I know more than most kids my age should. After Mrs. Peterson died, I got taken to my aunt's place, not a nice lady. As far as she knows I don't exist. I go to school because I'm pretty sure she is being forced to let me, or else she would have me scrub the entire house every day. But hey, at least I have a place to stay and food to eat every day.
I'm mostly alone, not feeling like staying home so I walk around town. I've hardened in the past four years, my parents death was hard, but I was a kid, didn't really know what was happening. But when Mrs. Peterson died... I... it was like something broke inside of me. So now I'm quiet
I'm a little bigger than kids my age and always looked a bit more intimidating. Packed on a little more muscle than a normal 17-year-old should have from working at my aunt's stable. So, people naturally assume I'm older.
Right now, I'm making my way back to my aunt's place from the market. She sent me to pick up some packages she had bought the other day. Apparently, she needed them as fast as possible. I don't know why she would need more clothes, but I do as I’m told.
I walked past some kids that looked much older than me, around 18 to be precise, when I went to dodge them one of them made contact with me, he bumped my shoulder, hard. I stumbled a little but didn't fall. 
"Well, would you look at that, it seems like we have a problem in our hands boys” the bigger one in the middle approached me first.
"Look, I’m not really in the mood to deal with this so I'll be on my way" I turned on my heel and picked up the box I had dropped.
"Oh yeah, you can go, as soon as you apologize." I froze at what I just heard; can you believe the stupidity some people have.
"Excuse me" I turned around slowly, cooking my head to one side.
"You heard me, apologize" he crossed his arms over his chest and a smirk I couldn't really tell was like. Mainly it looked stupid.
"Ok, I don't know if you lack the brain cells, well let’s be honest, you clearly do, but you bumped into me, so really the only one who should be apologizing here should be you" I put the box back on the ground expecting a fight.
"You better watch your mouth kid before I bust it open" the kid took a step closer to me hands tensing up
"What did I say something that hurt you, too bad, you should really keep your feelings in check before you go around messing with people" I smirked at him and his answer was as expected, the boy tried to push me, but I leaned back and punched him in the nose as I took a step back.
"You are going to regret that" I quickly dodge under him and make a run for it. There is a forest nearby that I know like the back of my hand. I'm sure they are not going to follow me there.
I ran as fast as my legs could carry me, heading towards the forest. When I finally made it seemed like I had lost them.
So, I stopped running. Paying attention to everything around me trying to make sure nothing would jump me when I heard a bush rustling to my right.
 Thinking it was one of the boys I walked towards the sound ready to take him on. Because clearly, running was not enough.
The mush was actually a bunch of plants together in one spot, so I walked into it. But as soon as I put one foot down, the ground gave way under me.
And I fell, fell for what felt like minutes.
Eventually I landed on a soft surface, it seemed to be... sand.
"Is this a beach?" I stood up and looked around, having no clue of what just happened how the hell did I just land on a beach
I got up and tried to rub off the sand I had on my face. Mainly out of my eyes and nose. Once I did, I decided to not waste any time and find out where I'm at.
I kept walking towards a hill on the far side of the beach. My feet felt heavy on the wet sand. I looked like a newborn foal walking around like this.
 I climbed the hill and came across the ruins of a castle. All of a sudden, I could feel this ancient power calling me from within the ruins.
For some reason I felt like me being here isn't a fluke or coincidence. Someone powerful wants me here.
I decided to explore the world around me, find a place to stay so I can survive. After exploring the ruins, I found a rusty sword on the ground. I took a strap of my shirt and tied it around my waist making sure the sword was secure.
I walked around aimlessly trying to find a sign of what I should do but found no answers. I sat down and began to think of ways I could get back home, everything I could come up with included a boat. Unfortunately, I don’t think there are any boats on this island.
From a distance I heard galloping, must be a dozen horses headed straight at me, the ground started trembling under my feet making me believe that there was more than I thought.  I tried to run but found out that I was surrounded. I took my sword out and waited for whatever was surrounding me to show their faces.
What came out of the woods surprised me to no end, out of all the things I thought it was this is definitely not one of those things. I found myself surrounded by Centaurs. 
Before I could react, I got tied up and hung from my legs.
“Take him back to camp, and tie him up to the post securely, can’t have anyone escape again” One of them said, it seems he was the leader. 
“I’m not sure what’s going on here, but trust me, you have the wrong g-” I got cut off by a rag being tied up around my mouth. 
What came next was hours of being hung upside down before reaching the centaurs camp. When we finally got there, my hands were tied around a wooden post that was extremely high. I started hearing voices, murmurs, and conversations between the centaurs. 
“Why are we keeping this boy here?” 
“He could be with the Tremarines”
“He’s just a boy!” a female centaur was arguing with the one who gave the order to capture me, confirming my initial thoughts of him being the leader. 
“We can’t risk it, many of our people died the last time something like this happened”
“All I’m saying is-” she got cut off by the sound of a horn that seemed to be an alarm.
Everyone started scrambling, some of the centaur running towards the children and the elderly and others straight for the weapons. The woman that wanted to let me go stood there, debating with herself of what she should do.
She picked up a dagger from a nearby table and cut me loose. I took off the rag around my mouth and ran as fast as I could away from the camp.
Something inside of me was screaming at me to turn back around and help them. I hesitated for a second but eventually found myself running back towards the camp. I picked up a sword that looked like one I could handle and went to see what the threat was.
There were soldiers attacking the centaurs. setting fire to their homes destroying any resource they had and slaughtering them. One of the men saw me and looked me dead in the eye. With an evil grin I saw him start to walk towards me, sword in hand ready for a fight.
Despite the fact that I have never fought with a sword in my life, I felt like I could do this. So, I charged at the man with all I had, and decided to use my small size as an advantage. whenever the man would swing right, I would dodge and slice at his left side, until eventually from either blood loss or fatigue, the man fell.
I kept running, killing any men that looked like an easy target. anyone who let their guard down.
As I was stabbing one of the soldiers, I saw that the man that had me tied up before was on the ground pinned. With a soldier about to swing his sword down on the centaur’s head. so, I stopped him, I crashed my sword with his, holding his sword with my blade. with one swift move I knocked the blade out of the man’s hand and tripped him holding my own sword to his neck.
“Leave, and tell whoever sent you to stop killing this people, or else he’ll deal with me”
I looked the man dead in the eye, used the shadow and darkness to make myself look more intimidating.
 The man called for a retreat, the few remaining soldiers ran with him, and they were chased down by the still standing centaurs.
I turned around and found the centaurs that didn’t run off bowed, with their swords on the ground. their leader did the same. this land, these creatures. There's something here that fills me, something I haven’t felt since Mrs. Peterson died. I wonder if this is a dream, and if it is I don’t want to wake up.
“I owe you my life Son of Adam” their leader stepped forward and bowed as well as the others. It felt right to do the same.
I dropped to my knees and stuck the sword, that was a little too big for me, on the ground, and bowed my head.
“My name is Elijah Thompson, I don’t know how I got here, and I’m afraid I am not from this world.” I stayed in the same position I was in not moving afraid of disrespecting the creature in any way.
“Rise Elijah Thompson, my name is Glenstorm,” he extended a hand to help me up. He explained to me where I was, a place called Narnia. He also told me of their situation and why he had me tied up.
“I understand, I would have done the same” I nodded at him, he clearly still felt guilty.
“So, tell me, if you aren’t from here, how you got here?” I told him everything from my aunt to the crazy man at the store.
After I did, he asked a question that got me thinking really hard.
“Do you wish to go back to where you are from?” I really wouldn’t be missed back home, and this here, something calls to me, I actually feel wanted here.
“no” I put simply.
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@the-second-tonks(you might like it)@arquitecturadelanada@moonrainbowfish
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blindingdutchy · 4 years ago
Text
lamentation | SEVEN
Tumblr media
{peter parker x fem!reader AU}
based on All the Bright Places by Jennifer Niven
SERIES MASTERLIST
word count: 4,000
warnings: fluff. angst. language. not even sure why i warn for angst anymore this whole story is just angsty af
18+!!! minors stay away!
In the following few weeks, you realized two things. One: Peter Parker was definitely not subtle. The other being that you were definitely in way over your head. There was no denying the stupid butterflies in your stomach anymore, or the way you found yourself expecting his touch before it even came.
It seemed as though the two of you were like magnets; a constant tug gravitating the pair of you back to each other with an unstoppable force. If you weren't together, he was on your mind, and like he could sense you thinking of him he'd be quick to reach out in some way or another. Be it appearing at your side, all happy grins and playful eyes, or calling your phone no matter the time with his stupidly adorable stutter--Peter seemed to think of you just as much as you thought of him.
The more that you thought of him, the more that you wished you didn't. It was terrifying. You wished that you could pull away again, to push him back out of your heart and lock those iron bars tight once more, but your heart had grown selfish and stubborn. It was as if you were the one locked out anymore; the control over your feelings slipping further and further from your clutches with every toothy smile Peter sent your way.
Like a magnet, he held you in place. Oh, to be held by... You slapped a pillow over your face and screamed, holding it so tightly that your nose ached and you couldn't breath. Peter Parker was like a disease. A stupid, all-consuming, utterly infatuating disease of the mind and the spirit.
You knew that you were wasting time, undoubtedly causing yourself to risk being late for school with every minute that passed as you continued to lay in your bed, but you couldn't bring yourself to get up. Already, your mother and father both had knocked at your door on multiple occasions and questioned if you were sick, and now you were regretting saying no. It would have been so easy to avoid him if you'd just played hookie.
But, with midterms in the near future, you knew it wasn't the best idea. The realization had come to you in the night. A moment so insignificant, so mundane, but it had been as if a switch were flipped in your mind. A light was turned on, so to speak, and illuminated all the thoughts and emotions you'd been so tirelessly repressing.
Talking on the phone with Peter was like a drug, and talking on the phone to him at night was a dangerous game. Under the dull light of a crescent moon and the ridiculous teddy-bear night light that was plugged into your wall, a lingering remnant of your sister's presence in the space, your inhibitions were always low. With sleepiness your walls were always lowered, and he'd unknowingly put a fatal crack in the foundation.
You rolled onto your stomach on your bed, kicking your feet through the air like a little kid as you fought back the grin that always seemed to worm its way across your lips when you were talking to him. "So, how do you like Ned and MJ?" Peter asked, and you could almost picture him mirroring your position as you heard the quiet rustle of blankets over the line. A little giggle bubbled out of your mouth at the thought.
What a sight that would be, Peter kicking his legs to and fro like a school girl in love. "They're cool. I kinda like that MJ doesn't even pretend to hide the fact that she thinks I'm weird. I don't--I don't know, it's refreshing I guess. Ned's sweet." you rambled, and it was the truth.
Ned and MJ were easily slipping into the fortress that shielded your heart with every passing day. Somehow, it wasn't as terrifying as you'd expected it to be. Perhaps that was because they didn't harbor a secret identity with which they risked their lives every single night, or maybe it was just because you'd come to realize that letting people in wasn't so bad. Not everyone was going to die on you.
Michelle Jones really didn't pretend not to think you were weird, not even a little bit. Her blunt and honest nature was a nice change from the quiet stares that seemed to follow your every move; MJ wasn't much for staring. Rather, she boldly told you what she was thinking without any shred of doubt.
And Ned, sweet Ned Leeds, was like a puppy personified. Always happy, always smiling, and always waiting to offer you compliments when you approached. You couldn't remember the last time someone had dared compliment your hair, your smile, or your outfits. Ned made it impossible to feel anything but comfort and joy in his presence, even his awkward nature was endearing.
"I'm glad." Peter hummed, "They really like you. To be honest, though, I kinda like it when it's just us. Maybe I should have waited a little longer to share you."
There was a pang in your chest at his words. Peter had been subtly flirting with you for days now, but this was more direct. He didn't have to come right out and say it for his implications to come across loud and clear, and that magnetic pull grew stronger.
So strong, in fact, that you murmured back, "I like it when it's just us, too."
If you had just kept your mouth shut, maybe he wouldn't have been so bold as to say, "Not gonna let them steal your heart from me, are you?"
The words were right at the tip of your tongue. Your heart was screaming, never! Nobody could ever steal me away from you, Peter! Yet, your mind was racing with a million and one horrible thoughts that made you feel as though your mouth was full of mud.
The silence between yourself and Peter grew thick as it drew on, no words escaping your lead-like lips. The voice in your brain, the one that sounded like your sister yet you knew was not her, was ringing in your ears. How could you ever fall in love, when she never could? How could you give your heart away, when she never had the chance?
You took that chance away from her. You stole it. This thing, whatever the weird force between the two of you was, was all stolen time, stolen opportunities, and stolen lives.
"Good night, (Y/N). I'll see you at school?"
You whispered, "Yes." The line went dead, and you felt cold.
Those simple words from Peter, with meaning and intention that was far from simple, were all it took to send the walls, bars, and barbed wire around your heart crumbling into nothing. With no protection, no barrier between yourself and the dangers of everyone else, your mind was working on overdrive. It would have been so easy to let him in, had that voice remained quiet, and yet you were steadily building those bricks back into place.
Now, all that was left to do was to steal your heart back. When had he managed to take it from you? Had he snuck in during the night, slipping through the strategically placed cracks and weak points he'd created, and stole away with it undetected? Had he taken it that first night, without you ever noticing?
As you finally released the pressure over the pillow on your face, sucking in a shaky breathe and letting all the heavy things crash over you again, tears burned your eyes. You didn't want to push Peter away. You didn't want to be the reason he was hurt, upset, or angry--you weren't ready to be the villain in his story.
"Mom?" you called out, knowing she was lingering close by.
Proving you correct, the door to your bedroom cracked open only seconds later and your mother's worried eyes fell upon your blinking ones. She definitely saw the troubled look on your face, the tears in your eyes, yet she held back from mentioning any of it as she asked, "Are you sick, honey?"
You nodded, the lump in your throat aiding your act as you croaked, "Yes. I don't feel good."
She frowned a little, knowing that you were bending the truth of the matter. Your mother was perceptive, and with the emotion all over your face, it easy for her to know that this wasn't some stomach bug or sore throat. To your relief, though, she resigned, "I'll call you out of school for the day. I'll be in my office if you need me."
Tomorrow, you could be the villain. For today, though, you were content to avoid your troubles and wallow in your self pity. At least this way you had some time to slip back into your stoic, cold demeanor before you had to face him. Time to prepare yourself to be alone again, because you knew that once you pushed Peter Parker away, Ned and MJ would be quick to follow him.
Sleep didn't come for you like you hoped it would. Well, it did, but then you found yourself dreaming of Peter and woke with a start. School had started an hour ago, and already there were a flurry of confused and increasingly alarmed messages from him lighting up your phone screen. Even though you couldn't hold back from reading them, you locked it before you found yourself replying as if on autopilot.
Pete: are you late
Pete: i'm at your locker
Pete: hello?
Pete: i'm going to class... see you there?
Pete: are you okay? you said you'd be here
Pete: at least let me know you're aldkhdkfj
You spent the day in your room, ignoring Peter and ignoring the world. Occasionally your mother would crack open your door to check on you, fussing over feeling your forehead despite the fact that you both knew you didn't have a fever, and tittering little comments about getting rest and staying hydrated. She knew you weren't sick, yet you were grateful she didn't try to pry.
As much as you wanted to tell her all of the things that were on your mind, the reasons that you were upset, you couldn't. You couldn't tell her all of the awful things you were thinking, and see the way her face would contort in anguish over you. You certainly couldn't listen to her telling you that it wasn't your fault, you weren't wrong for liking a boy, and your sister would want you to be happy. Even if you knew, in some deep part of your brain, that it was true.
Pete: got my phone taken in calculus sorry
Pete: I'm at lunch now, are you okay?
Pete: are you sick?
Pete: like... actually sick?
Peter really was relentless. You wondered how long it would take for him to catch onto what you were doing, or if he would at all. Would he understand why you suddenly gave him the cold shoulder? Would he understand, and be okay when you pushed him away again?
Pete: I'm in speech now.
Pete: we got the class to work on the speech and you're not here
Pete: not that we could do much anyways since you're so stubborn but still
Pete: okay what is going on
Pete: (Y/N)
Pete: please talk to me
Reading all of his messages kept the ache in your chest alive, stopping the numbness from creeping back in. You wished you could put your phone down, turn it off even, but it was like a cruel an addicting game to read each message as it arrived. You found yourself watching the little three dots as he typed another message eagerly, even if he was far from happy.
When school ended, he called. You let it ring each time, watching his name scroll across your screen over and over again until it ended. Once, twice, three times--he finally stopped calling, not leaving a voicemail.
For awhile, you wondered if that was it. Was he done? Had he caught on? Had he figured you out just as easily as he always seemed to do? Had Peter given up?
Pete: i know what you're doing
Pete: i'm sorry if i made you uncomfortable
Pete: we can just be friends if that's what you want
It wasn't what you wanted, and that was the problem. You didn't want to be friends with Peter Parker. Well, you didn't want to just be friends with him. You wanted to know what his touch felt like when it was deliberate and welcoming, not the fleeting and curious brushes of his skin on yours. To be held by him, to taste his lips, to hold his heart in your hands like he already held yours--you wanted so much more than friendship with Peter, and that made you a thief and a fraud.
You: that's not what i want
You were weak. A weak, cowardly idiot is what you were, and you threw your phone on your bed with a groan as you realized what you'd done. The voice in your mind whispered insults, taunting you for being so easily broken.
Pete: what do you mean
You: i don't want to be friends with you Peter
Pete: oh
One simple word, and you realized he had taken that in a completely different way than you had meant it. Yet, you didn't correct him. You didn't explain that you meant you didn't want to just be friends. Maybe this was your chance--an easy way to kick him outside your walls without having to see it firsthand.
The chance didn't last long. A quiet knock sounded on your window, and your heart froze in your chest as you tried to sink deeper into your bed. It was the wind, you told yourself, until the knock sounded again and slightly louder. You could see the shadow on your floor out of the corner of your eye, and you buried your face into your pillow to block it out. If you ignored him, he would go away, and this would all be over.
After a few more knocks, it was silent for awhile, and you tempted a look at the floor only to frown at the sight of the shadow missing. He was gone, and you were alone again. Your lip quivered at the thought; what had you done? It was a mistake. This was a mistake.
You didn't want to push him away. You wanted him to hold your heart. You wanted Peter Parker as your friend, as more than a friend, hell, as anything as long as it was with you. But now? Going back on your word and dragging him back in again would be pathetic. He didn't deserve such treatment, especially not from you.
So, you pulled your pillow back over your face and let the tears fall. Your hot breath burned your eyes and made you feel sticky and gross, but you didn't care one bit. It felt cathartic to cry, like returning to a familiar place you'd been skirting around for ages. Crying over Peter was different than crying over your sister; the hurt was different, but one thing was the same: both were all your fault.
"Go away, mom." you whined, barely hearing the sound of your door unlatching over your muffled sniffles. It creaked further open, and you groaned, pressing the pillow harder onto your face, "Mom, please, I just want to be alone."
A throat cleared, and you froze. That wasn't your mother, the voice was deeper. The sound was still too light to be your father's, though, and that left one option that made your blood run cold. He didn't--did he?
He did. Peter pried the pillow out of your hands, all red cheeks and sad eyes as he stared at you in a sullen silence. "Why are you doing this?" he whispered, "Why are you pushing me away?"
You blinked at him, too paralyzed by the sight of his fluttering eyelids and pouting lips to speak. It must have been a sight to see you like that, your face red and blotchy, streaked with tears and snot that you'd been too lazy to wipe away. He didn't look away from your eyes, though, gazing into them with an intensity that dared you to look away.
Sensing that you weren't going to speak, he pressed on, "(Y/N), what is going on? I don't--It's okay if you don't like me back, I can deal with that. I want to be your friend, though. I thought you wanted to be mine, too."
Voice scratchy, you muttered, "I don't."
Something changed in him, and suddenly Peter was raking a hand through his hair as he frowned deeply. You wanted to smooth the crease between his brows, but you felt frozen. He was angry; he was angry with you, and he didn't hold back as he snapped, "That's bullshit, and you know it. If you didn't want to be friends, then why did you make that deal? Why did you let me make a complete fool of myself just to get your attention? Why did you let me introduce you to my friends? Stop lying to me!"
"I'm not!" you yelped, sitting up frantically and wiping at your face, finally. "I'm not lying, Pete!"
He threw his head back at the nickname, a sigh of exasperation forcing its way from his lips, nostrils flared. "I don't get you, (Y/N). I don't get you at all." he growled, facing you again with a heavy brow.
You gripped your blankets tightly, bunching them around your waist as you blinked at him with wide eyes. "I don't want to just be your friend, Peter!" you burst, "I don't want to just be your friend, and I don't know why. You make me feel all these things that terrify me, but I keep chasing after you and whatever those things are! It was so easy being alone, okay? Then suddenly you came swinging into my life and made everything so--so complicated!"
Your mother's face peered into your room, eyes blown wide in surprise, but the moment you glanced at her she backed away with a bitten smile and you flushed. You didn't get the chance to dwell on the fact that she'd been eavesdropping, though, because Peter sat on the edge of your bed and bit the inside of his cheek, blinking at you with teasing eyes.
"So, you like me?"
Eyes narrowed, you grumbled, "Are you really going to make me say it, Pete? After all of that?"
A sly grin stretched across his lips, cheeks puffing out adorably and making you bite your own to keep from grinning too. He tutted, raising his ruffled brow as he jabbed, "After everything else today? I think it's the least you could do."
You were screwed. His fingertips barely caressed the backs of your knuckles, and you shakily grabbed them before he pulled away again. "I like you, jerk." you mumbled, screwing your eyes shut as you felt your face burn in embarrassment.
Peter just chuckled, squeezing your hand as you felt your bed shift under his weight. "I don't want to just be your friend, either." his breathe fanned over your cheek, and your eyes snapped open to find his face closer than ever. If you just turned, ever so slightly, his lips would brush your own... He kissed your cheek softly, backing away with a tiny smile that you matched. "I like you a lot. Probably more than like, really."
"That scares me." you whispered, eyes still latched onto his, "Peter, you scare me."
He took a long moment to answer, weighing heavily the words he would utter next, before finally telling you, "You scare me, too, but I think it's worth it."
A gentle tapping at your door crashed through the moment, both of your faces burning a deep red as you turned to face your mother's sheepish smile. "Sorry, sorry, don't mind me--"
"Mom!" you wailed, slapping your hands over your face in mortification as she stealthily slipped into your room and dropped a box of condoms onto your dresser before racing away again. "Oh, I can't believe she--Mom! Did you really have to do that?"
Peter was laughing boisterously, head thrown back and eyes shut, though you could tell he was flustered too from the cherry red color that creeped down from his face and under his shirt. As humiliated as you were by your mother's actions, you couldn't help but to feel a little grateful for the interruption. The intensity, the tension in the air, had disappeared with the intrusion, and things felt a little bit lighter again.
You flopped back onto your bed, still pouting over the spectacle, as Peter breathed out, "That's so something Aunt May would have done, too."
At least you weren't alone in the embarrassing family department, you thought to yourself as Peter threw himself down beside you. She meant well, obviously, but did she really think that you and Peter were going to go from admitting you liked each other to ripping each other's clothes off in one night? Well, you were eighteen--maybe she had a bit of a reason to be so hasty.
"Do you think it's worth it?" Peter questioned, and you turned your head to face him, trying to ignore the close proximity of his face to your own. "Liking me?"
You chewed at your lip, listening for that voice in your head that had suddenly gone silent. "Yeah, yeah I do." you responded, and his face split in a blushing smile. You did think it was worth it, because being with him reminded you of all the good feelings you missed out on when he wasn't around. "I just wish we could have been like this before. Maybe then I wouldn't feel like I'm stealing her life."
He grew serious in an instant, eyebrows furrowing as he stated, "I don't." At the sight of your confusion, he continued, "I don't wish we met before. Can you honestly say that you're the same person you were before?"
"No."
He nodded, "Exactly. Stuff like that... It changes you. I would know, remember? You wouldn't be the you that I like, and if Uncle Ben were here maybe I wouldn't be who you like, either."
You had to admit, he had a point. "I guess so." you pondered aloud.
"You're not stealing her life, either, (Y/N). She would have wanted you to be happy, to do all the things she never got to. It took me a long time to stop thinking that way, too, but I did. It wasn't your fault, and you can't miss out on stuff just because of her." Peter advised, and you swallowed down the lump that was growing steadily in your throat, "She didn't give up her life for you to stop living yours."
Fuck, Peter really knew exactly what to say. You, however, were at a loss for words. He said all of the things that you'd needed to hear for so long, so perfectly, and it rocked you to your core. How did he know just what you needed to hear? The answer was simple--because he knew you, and he knew how you were feeling. He knew, because he had lived it.
Changing the subject, you asked, "So, what do we do now?"
You didn't have to explain for him to understand, and he swallowed thickly, "Do you... will you be my girlfriend?"
"Yeah. That might be worth it."
He scoffed, "Might be? Forget it, I don't want you to be my--"
"I want to be your girlfriend, Pete!" you cut him off, laughing loudly. "I really, really want to." So, maybe you lied when you said that Peter made things complicated. In fact, Peter made things incredibly easy--and that made it worth it.
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