#to be clear I'm not done musing or articulating

[whatisthiswitchcraft]

now that pride month is overrr here is something tht I have been musing over & have not yet been able to fully articulate: I remember enjoying pride in the past but still feeling disconnected and wishing that there was more of a focus on history/more of a year round presence and sense of community. and somehow (through work and time! but also fun and much love!) I have not only found that but helped build that. and I feel stronger & happier for it. and I so look forward to doing more.

[whiteboi-inferiority]

Some of you been trying to get in touch lately. That's cool.

If you're just swinging by to say hi and thanks, then what follows doesn't apply to you.

You want me to talk to you though? Some hints and tips (and very common mistakes to avoid) that will increase your chances of an actual conversation or two and from there, who knows.

The best way is to have a blog with some original content. Pics of you, stories, captions, whatever. I'm looking for commitment and authenticity, some skin in the game, some evidence of actual fucking effort. In your message don't just fawn. I don't need that. Be brief, be articulate, be confident in what you like and what you bring to the table and be clear on why you want a place with me, specifically, over any generic black guy or Dom. Job interview etiquette applies and know I get 4 or 5 'candidates' a day. Respect the fact I am a busy guy with a life away from here, several real life submissives, and several more long distance things going on. My girls, gurls and bois are all different, all exquisite, and they all interest me in different ways. It's on you to show me what i'm missing and why I'm going to make time for you. Be a muse, be amusing. Wow me.

So!

If you have an empty blog, don't bother. I'm not interested in lurkers.

If your blog is just reposts of the usual stuff I've seen 100 times before, don't bother.

If you're just going to start contact with 'hey...', don't bother. I'm not interested.

If you're just looking for someone, anyone, to Dom you for the 2 minutes it takes for you to jerk off, don't bother. I'm not a jack off service.

If your blog is full of explicit hard core porn, don't bother - your account will be deactivated soon and you'll probably be disappeared before we start chatting away from here anyway. You don't represent a good ROI of my time. Of the 4 or 5 of you that make contact today, 2 of you will be gone tomorrow, and at least 1 more within the month. Even duvluvv and bangmybully my previous mainstays and inspo on this blog have managed to fuck that up and get themselves banned.

Unless your wife/gf/mom/daughter is hot, living near me and interested in hooking up, I don't care that you wish you could see them suck a cock like a Blacked girl right in front of you. If I can't see it, smell it, hear it, taste it or feel it - if its not actually going to happen on my cock - I don't care.

Outright headcanon fantasists and part-timers who 'don't need to dress up because they can imagine it so well...', hard pass. If I tell you to feminise yourself, take a pic in a certain pose, jerk off a certain way or make a post about something it isn't a question of whether you feel you need that to sustain your little fantasy. It's a question of whether you're going to pay the price of submission to talk to me. If you can't or won't follow simple instruction, then I have no interest in you.

Those of you who confuse sissy with trans, hard pass. Trans women are women. You are not a woman just because you fantasise about being sexually submissive and effeminate around a black man. You're a sissy, a toy, a whiteboi fuckdoll. That's all. If you can't or don't accept that, don't bother.

FLR, ABDL, Gooners: kittens I adore seeing you relinquish your masculinity and pride to roll around in your own shame and filth. But to be clear: these kinks are your weaknesses, not my interests. I cater to you because my mission is to enable every single last one of you whiteboi fucks to become codependent emasculated bottom-feeders of one kind or another, willingly, done by yourselves to yourselves, stripped of the convenient deniability of coercion. I'm fixing to cook and push good quality junk so you can fuck yourselves up, not share the needle. Definitely not looking to change your fucking diapers.

If you clearly haven't read this pinned note, don't bother.

Stay sticky, losers

D

[bookwyrminspiration]

why is legacy your least favourite of the series now? (btw I haven’t reread kotlc in forever all I remember is that Tam is gone and Keefe is having a Bad Time)

I think what happened is that upon rereading the other 2 I disliked, I realized their faults weren't as bad as I'd remembered, and Legacy just has very little to draw me in, and everything else is not to my taste. I'd been denying it for a while I think, trying to stay positive, but in being honest with myself this last reread it just really bothers and upsets me at times. I can try to articulate it, but there's a lot of layers that even I don't understand to my reaction, so heads up

(nothing against anyone who enjoys legacy!! i'm simply not one of you. this is your warning that this is a more critical/less positive post and perspective on legacy. if you don't want to see that, don't look)

Sophie's relationships are an inevitable part of the story the way it's written; it becomes very prevalent here, and none of it's positive, it's just more conflict--and not even satisfying conflict, to me. I'm queer in a way that doesn't involve romance and attraction, and I could not care less about Sophie's drama. And I know people talk about the importance of connecting to stories about people with experiences you don't have, but I don't think this is one of them. I've read fantasy stories with conflicted romance before, and even though I'm very attached to these characters...I just don't care for how Shannon's doing it.

I won't deny that part of it is frustration and anger knowing how some people take what happened in Legacy to further unfairly demonize Fitz (who is one of my top 2 characters)--and that part of that will be done in a "see how toxic Fitz is? Keefe is so perfect for her instead" kinda way. Which bothers me because it ignores so much about so many characters, not just Fitz. And I know they are entitled to their thoughts and interactions as much as I am, and I try not to let it get to me too much (curating my own experience and all that), but I can't deny that I'm at least aware of it. And that that knowledge negatively impacts my reading experience when I become more conscious of it. at least at the moment

And I suppose it also just makes it obvious the disconnect between me and the story. I can brush past Sophie's crush musings and brief flustered moments. But an entire book where a significant conflict is her failing relationship and searching for her parents to try and fix said relationship? It's like a whole book of "hey! here's something really important to most people!! that isn't to you! remember how different you are?" To be clear, I don't mind being different, I quite like the kind of queer I am. I don't want to change it.

It's more like a...well now I have to put up with and trudge through this tiresome stereotypical shit in a series I really like, too? I poke a lot of fun, but Keeper is genuinely a really important and prevalent series in my life, even though its not my favorite. And it's like...here, too?

I'm not opposed to relationships in fiction, there are several I quite enjoy and they can have very important places and purposes! Keeper just isn't one of them that really speaks to me--at least in canon. I don't like how sophitz was written, I don't like how Sophie's been characterizing Fitz and Keefe, I don't like her reaction to and focus on her match status even though I understand it from a character perspective. Their relationships just haven't been the compelling kind to me

I could try and link all this to like, poor writing or inconsistent characterization or catering to fans and things like that. I could probably come up with a polished argument if I tried, make it technical and about a bunch of mistakes made but at the end of the day? it's really just not to my taste. I just don't like it, even though I can logically understand why most things happened, how they were in character and contribute to their development. I just don't like what happened. I don't like how romance focused it was and how relationships panned out. I'm disappointed sophitz ended how it did, how the characters behaved in their relationships, how Sophie reacted to her match status, her inability to pull herself together for a while, how sidelined Tam's kidnapping felt, how some people will demonize Fitz, etc.

I read keeper for entertainment, and there just was nothing for me. I do what I can to appreciate its place in the series, and to acknowledge when it is true to the characters, including in ways I can't connect to. But this isn't a series I read for self betterment or learning or anything, it's for fun and none of what happened was fun for me (meaning fun in like a satisfying entertainment way including heartbreak and tragedies and horrors, not that it has to be silly and light hearted)

That was probably more than you were expecting; it was more than i was expecting! But it's such a visceral reaction that it's hard to identify and translate, and I'm sure there's more to it I haven't uncovered. in fact as I was writing this the process helped me think through more of my reaction, so thanks for the opportunity :)

[susansontag]

it's true that a lot of people online give themselves permission to say "dramatic" things about strangers because it's sadly very normalized here. but i don't think we necessarily need to swoop on the lowest level attainable and choose between different forms of violent speech every time we are really angry about something, emotionally mature people are capable of expressing strong opinions without wishing violence on the person they disagree with. instead of diverting with the whataboutism, you could just answer the question if you really care so much. what did you mean by what you wrote and if you didn't mean it at all then why not admit that you misspoke? what could the consequences possibly be?

I can see you're really clinging to this and I understand because I've done this before with bloggers on here too especially women. but I was not saying dramatic things about any targeted stranger, I was introducing a hypothetical and then giving an example of the kind of - imo - unhinged behaviour I meant. it must be kept in mind this was a throwaway joke post, made in about a few minutes or so

this is a very personal admission and shouldn't be taken as anything more than musing, but I actually have a type of obsessive compulsive disorder that used to make me feel very, strongly guilty about even saying 'I want this person to die' (and I could be talking about a world leader whose policies are responsible for killing millions of people!). I avoided any sense of moral ambiguity in anything I said because I was truly terrified this meant I was a 'bad person' who 'condoned violence' etc. but the truth is, I've given myself the permission that other ordinary people allow themselves all the time, to just say whatever it is I think, no matter if it's a bit silly, or hyperbolic, or whatever; because I should be allowed the grace in interpretation that other people are afforded when they say throwaway comments like this, too. from others (though you don't always get it, which is fine), but also from myself. the reason being is that it's not actually a huge deal or something to get so hung up on

so yes, like you, I have certain standards of conduct; I rarely (or perhaps nowadays never?) say people should 'kill themselves', for example, because this feels personal to me as someone with mental health issues who cares deeply about these topics. I can assure you, if I had even remotely been alluding to domestic violence against women when I quipped 'should be slapped', it would not have been written. I would have deleted it and written something else. this, of course, doesn't insulate me from the interpretations of others who take it a different way, either maliciously assigning significance to it that wasn't there to try and get the upper hand in an argument, or because they truly misread me and are perhaps upset I used language like that. I hope, at least, I've been able to clear up my intentions here

that said, I won't be apologising for the throwaway comment. I have considered it in writing this post and have written nothing that troubles me or my values. I'm sorry we disagree, but I still don't believe it's a big deal. you ofc don't have to accept that and can hold yourself to whatever standards of, well, discussion, posting, articulating yourself, idk, that you like. but you can't get someone else to repent for misbehaviour just because you wouldn't allow yourself it or dislike it. there was no literal person or even a concrete group against which I was threatening an actual act of violence; it was purely hypothetical to get a point across about how silly and ridiculous I find something. I believe to most people this came across loud and clear