#tldr criticism hurts but youve got to deal w it

[fae-ryn]

You open up Ao3. You have a new comment! That’s exciting, right? Except the commenter says your romantic leads don’t seem to actually like each other and you’ve repeatedly used the wrong ‘your/you’re’. And that hurts.

Negative comments on fics suck, especially when you know you’ve got difficulties in areas the commenters mention. So here’s how to deal with them.

There are two main types of negative comment. One is almost definitely cussing at you and probably mentions how bad the source material is/the fandom is/how awful you are as a person for writing [insert really anything here]. Ignore these. They’re just annoying people trying to make you angry and engaging with them is pointless.

The other will bring up the commenter’s legitimate concerns. Sometimes these are things you know you’ll be addressing soon, such as characters acting strangely or something that would be a plot hole if you didn’t already have an explanation. Other times a commenter has missed something in the story that is leading them to question you now, in which case you can often explain yourself and both parties leave happy.

But sometimes this isn’t the case and you need to address the fact that someone does not like what you have dedicated hours or days of your life to writing.

It works best for me to read the comment, then find something else to do for a while. My immediate response is to be angry and defensive, and that’s not useful so I do something so I can move past the anger.

Then read it again. Why is the commenter giving you this negative criticism? You want to know what they’re trying to tell you. Are parts of their complaint personal preference as opposed to legitimate problem? You can’t fix that, so ignore those parts for now. Why was your initial response [whatever it was]? If it was anger, is it because criticism can hurt or because you know it’s a weak point for you?

Then take the comment and divide it into things you can and want to fix now, things you can’t fix period, and things you can’t fix for this fic but want to get right in the future. For something like a grammar mistake such as mixing up it’s and its, the problem can be fixed easily and goes into the 'can and want to fix now’ pile. Just be more careful of it in the future, and if you have time and feel like it go back and fix previous chapters. The 'can be fixed’ pile should be reserved for future plot points and minor errors, things that are relatively easy to edit. If you have to go back three chapters and rewrite all of them to fix it, it goes into the 'can’t fix for this fic’ pile. If it only requires rewriting one chapter or part of one, it’s up to you if you want to or not. Things the commenter disliked on a personal level go into 'can’t fix period’.

The next step is up to you. If you want to and think you can calmly respond to the comment and thank them for what was useful or explain some of the problems that they have, go ahead. You can explain how you plan to fix the problem or just say you’re trying to improve in certain areas. This step is entirely optional and I’d advise against doing it if you think you will come across as angry or defensive. Part of giving critical commentary is trusting that the writer will not lash out at you for it. Don’t be that writer.

Take your 'can and should be fixed’ and fix them. Take your time to understand why you’ve made the mistake(s).

Take the 'can’t be fixed period’ and forget about them. Everyone’s preferences are different. Trying to please everyone is more likely to harm your writing than actually do any good.

Keep the 'can’t be fixed in this fic’ and remember them for next time. If it’s something like being bad at action scenes try writing a one-shot that is mostly or entirely action. Write several until you’re happy with it. If your plot lacked direction, try to understand where you went wrong. Googling 'How can I write a story with a clear direction’ might prove helpful. If you fell into using overused tropes, look out for them in your next story so you can avoid them or try subverting the trope instead. If you were accidentally xenophobic it might help you to understand where your prejudices are coming from and read posts by [insert minority group here] before you try to write from their perspective.

The final step, once you’ve learned everything you can, is to step away from the situation and move forward. Dwelling on it past learning from it gets you nowhere and spending your time wishing you could rewrite a fifteen chapter, 100k word story is pointless. You’ll get to the end and realize it still isn’t perfect because it never will be. If you’re doing this right you’ll always be improving and your previous work will never be as good as what you’re currently doing. You have to accept that. Learn from the comment, don’t let it convince you to stop writing.

I get it. Criticism hurts. It takes something you poured your entire self and hours if not days of your time into and says 'You’ve done something or somethings wrong.’ That doesn’t feel good and while it gets easier to respond to it won’t ever truly be a comfortable experience. That doesn’t mean it’s okay to lash out or to ignore it though. If you aren’t in the right mind frame to deal with it then hold off until you are, but don’t decide that you will always by default know better than your commenters or you will stagnate.