#tl;dr unfollow me and follow my friends instead

[kaimukiwahine]

Can I get a 7, 14, and 17 please :3

Two!? I really kicked a bee's hive, huh. Okay, well, it's a long one:

7. Favourite works of all time excluding your own?

Uhhh, in general, I will go on my hands and knees and worship to what is the To the Moon/Sigmund Corp. series. Though I’m not constantly making art for it, It is one of my absolute favorite creative works out there. Beautiful piano-guitar music (Born a Stranger, Having Lived (TtM and FP), The Scale Theme (Piano and Guitar versions), Time is A Place, and A Reality Without Me being top tracks), a rpg indie game with memorable characters, and thought-provoking stories.

Also that they were the first few games to touch on the autism spectrum (though they couldn’t say it out right, only hinting it due to supposedly the huge stigma towards the very concept of it at the time though not confirmed to my knowledge). I didn't know much about it at the time but now with the possibility of myself being on the spectrum, I don't know. Think it's pretty neat?

Outside of that… I could list everything my friends have made ever if you want? Watching them create and improve and explore other styles and formats is very inspiring. Seeing them get that fire in their eyes and sharing their thought process and glee is infectious. If I could, I print them all out, frame and hang them in a gallery or learn to book bind and make a library.

14. How has your art changed over the years?

Going from a mouse user who avoid drawing faces and just made a dA account because someone I followed on FF.net wanted friends on there and someone in my third-year arch studio said the smudge art thing looked cool, to getting my first tablet, to where I am now... It really surprises how much has changed and how much stayed the same. I hope it changed for the better than regressing backwards but it’s hard to tell at times.

(Shoutout to past me who did this with a mouse. And to my sis who is a higher creative being that I can only dream of breathing who made the original)

17. What inspires you?

Sidu is one, she’s responsible for all the MVs and character designs for the Kagerou Project. The characters aren’t usually bombastic (aside one) but they still leave an impact. She tends to lean more into the subtlety and I kinda wanna do that too in stills or one day animations. (The MVs are amazing, go watch them especially the Ayano ones if you want to cry).

Other than that, most of my friends and their creative energy fuels a lot of what I do. Either though their writing, AUs, art, it just drives me to try and do the same. Just with the TWH AU, I have ton of ideas because of the wonderful folks there and I really wish I had all the time in the world to do them all to the best of my ability. If only I have enough time that is..

[melanodis]

NAVIGATION arc.txt — incoherent rambling art.psd — art tag others art — art I reblog that isn't mine. I try to tag these by the original poster as well for sorting. archive — what it says on the tin - better for searching since it shows everything whereas tumblr search does not.

Arc / Michael | 18 | he/him | fan artist #1 undefeated champion of being strange and off-putting. don't call me they. personal: @lainps1 for all my bitching

Cohost | Discord | Twitter | Bluesky

REQUIRED READING. LIKE IF YOU GOT TO THE END 👍

I'm autistic and super annoying about my interests. I block who I want when I want and I will not negotiate on established terms. I openly say and frequently use words such as faggot and queer, along others. If these bother you, the unfollow and/or block button is right there. I am incredibly delusional and schizophrenic. I am not the type to "jump in" on a group conversation, I need to be cordially invited in or asked questions order to do anything like a vampire. You have to understand that being told "haven't you ever noticed that you're always the one starting conversations? nobody wants to talk to you lmao" does some FUCKED shit to your psyche. If you can't accommodate for something as simple as that, then you're simply ableist. There's no way around it. Not interested in being mutuals with you if you genuinely don't like me as a person. I would rather have and deeply appreciate if people ask for me to follow them. I try to keep things quiet. I am very social but I'm cautious about following people back and I try to be kind to the best of my ability. One thing I am adamant about is not rewarding aggressive behavior. If you call yourself mean or a hater I'll simply take your word for it and assume I fall under the category of those you target.

TL;DR: I love making new friends and don't mind interaction but it needs to be known beforehand that I suffer from delusions and can be erratic at times. I will not associate myself with self proclaimed "haters" and you will be blocked on sight. Feel free to talk to me, tag me in anything, ask me anything, I really do love human interaction but I'd appreciate if you ask me to follow you back instead of doing it on my own.

minors please filter #n/s/f/w and #rent lowering gunshot

[laplacemail]

Hmmm.

I was thinking about remaking, but that won’t lead me anywhere. What I might do is clean up my blog a little bit/check who still wants to do something? I want to write here but I honestly don’t know who wants to continue what/if people want to continue threads or talking altogether. 

But one of the big changes that I will make here is that I will make this blog primarily OC focused. As in, I will remove all my canon muses and shove them in my bonus page that you can ask me if we are really good friends. It’s nothing against RPing canon muses, I just spend way more time (and money!) on my OCs and I’d like them to have more of the spotlight. Which means I’ll be revamping my muse page and finally sitting down to write the OCs that I want to bring forward at least a small bio page. 

I admire people who do graphics and very elaborate stuff a lot, but I am Very Disabled (tm) and busy (I’m married, ADHD, executive dysfunction, like thirty other things going on, taking care of my husband and our silly apartment, not things u need to know but I feel like sometimes I need to explain why everything about me is so sporadic and activity is so spread out) and I either have energy to make things fancy or to write. Sometimes I don’t even have the energy to write. So I might go back to simple gdocs pages for all of them, to make it easier on myself. I already gave up on smalltext because even that made me agonize about writing. 

I know I dropped the ball on a lot of people re: plotting (and I am so so so so sorry for that), but I really prefer plotting + talking about our characters instead of doing 90 small threads like... people usually do. It’s legit easier on my brain when I know what I need to focus on instead of constantly trying new things. Of course this does not apply to memes I send people, it’s easy to do that and I love doing that. Plus I don’t like using icons most of the time and I feel like doing small/impromptu stuff - that is not my forte - without it makes my blog look very clogged/weird. Again, this is mostly me. I prefer doing longterm things that I know I will get a cool story out of + someone to talk about said story. It was my reason to start writing to begin with, I like creating stories with other people.  

But yeah tl;dr I’m not going to move blogs, but I might clean my follower list up real bad, throw most of my Canon muses in a locker and slap very simple things on my blog from now on. If we have a thread or you want to continue something please let me know. I’ll also be cleaning my inbox and just considering most of my threads (except for the few people that I already rp with and they know my very on-off-mostly-off schedule or if we have already good established relationships in-character) dropped. 

So with that said if you’re not ok with it for whatever reason you can feel free to unfollow me! I’m having way less time to write these days and I kind of want to focus on things that people actually want to write with me <:3c 

[pineapple-lover-boy]

For my last post where I talked about how I like bad and abusive characters to cope with with my own life I mentioned some characters in the tags to get it going. Now I’ve seen some of their apologists liking that post. (They don’t just like the character but some of their posts try to justify their actions)

No matter if someone has gone through something like abuse, a tough childhood, a bad breakup, or major insecurities (all of which go with the characters I put in the tags), that doesn’t mean they should be aloud to hurt others.

I tagged Severus Snape. He had a hard childhood, he was bullied, bad home life. All of these can go together to create someone who’s hurt and suffering. But that doesn’t excuse his behavior later in life. He bullied children based on trivial things (Harry was related to Lily but also James, Hermione is Harry’s friend *hc up ahead* but also a smart muggleborn like Lily, Ron is Harry’s friend *hc up ahead* but also red headed like Lily, *hc up ahead* Neville could’ve been the chosen one and Lily would’ve lived). See the pattern here? It was all because of his love and obsession for a woman who trusted him but he then slurred and after she rightfully walked away he went into a slump because all he ever cared about was her. And don’t hit me with that “but he became a double agent to protect Harry” bullshit. He clearly didn’t want to do that, it was Dumbledore’s doing. He was abused throughout his life but he then took it out on CHILDREN. There is NO excuse for that.

Bakugou Katsuki. Now as the manga and anime still go on he is changing for the better but this is for those who dismiss his actions because he’s hot. He went through some major stuff when he was little. All his life he’s been praised for his quirk and has just taken that all in to become an arrogant prick. Also whenever he got hurt, instead of people asking if he was ok, he was told how wonderful he was. That does a lot to a child’s psyche. BUT that does not excuse that fact that he told Deku to go kill himself! I know that was all the way in the first episodes but his attitude never really changed until recently. I love Bakugou with all my heart, he’s what got me into anime, but he’s an asshole. He treats Deku like shit just because he hasn’t got a quirk and he thinks that Deku thinks he’s better than him which is clearly far from the truth. Bakugou’s story isn’t over yet though so let’s hope he’s redeemed properly.

Akemi Keiichi and Tamura Yui. This one I’ll keep short. I’ll focus on specific moments in the manga than it all together. Akemi, while he clearly lives Itome, treats him like shit. They have their cute moments but Akemi’s behavior with others has gotten to Itome, and it shows. It is very obvious (in the manga) that Akemi once had a lover who left him for a woman and during the manga has gotten her pregnant (which explains his hatred for women). He’s scared to get close to Itome in fear that he’ll get hurt but that is NO EXCUSE FOR CHEATING ON YOUR SPOUSE. They have a special situation, granted, but Itome’s disdain for having sex with other people shows he wants a closed off relationship. I absolutely hate cheaters and people who get with other people in relationships while knowing of said relationships. I ABSOLUTELY loath them. No one should be have to suffer because of their spouses lousy, idiotic, hurting decision to break that trust and become a monster (in my eyes). (Also if you have cheated on someone do not follow me or unfollow, I don’t support thoughts who bring emotional turmoil to the ones they were supposed to love; there is no excuse). Now for Tamura. He is the definition of “being an asshole cause I love it”. Now, it’s shown that he was bullied and then of course the gangr@pe that he went through (I won’t be mentioning that as much because it’s canonical that he enjoyed it). No matter how much bullying someone goes through, they should never bully others. I’m not sure if Tamura still gets pushed around but either way he did the year before the manga started. Also he bullies Yacchan just because he likes him. *takes in a breath* YOU SHOULD NEVER BULLY SOMEONE BECAUSE OF YOUR OWN FEELINGS!!! And you should also never tell young children (mostly girls) that because someone is abusing you, it means they actually secretly love you. I feel this is the biggest reason as to why I’m not that big of a fan of Tamura. Either way, both these characters still have an ongoing story as the manga hasn’t ended yet so I hope they become better people in the long run (probably not though; if your a fan you’ll understand why).

TL;DR: just because a person went through something bad doesn’t mean they can do the same to others. Apologists for these characters should see them as flawed people (as we all are). Seeing them as gray characters doesn’t mean you shouldn’t like them or what they went through doesn’t matter. It means that your giving the character justice. Don’t lie to yourself and others because you want to make your fave the ultimate goody two shoes. It won’t work and it’s stupid.

[choidaehoon]

my dearest mutuals and followers i'm letting y'all know that tumblr user authorise is a total weirdo who has been stalking my blog + other socials and plagiarises/steals the stuff i come up with like blog themes, jokes, fandom content, etc. they were still doing it until very recently (both the stalking and the plagiarising) so i confronted them about it after years of letting them off the hook, but instead of apologising to me, or at least owning up to it, they doubled down on it, accused me of being toxic (??????), and told me that i was just being big-headed... like a.) they didn't use to force their way into being mutuals/internet friends with me, and b.) i haven't been aware of their existence for years. i also have a script installed on my blog that lets me see + know my blog visitors so i know for a fact that they regularly stalk my tumblr and i've seen them follow + unfollow me on twitter several times. even on my newly remade account that i didn't tell anyone about save for my close friends and years-long mutuals, which creeped me out so much. i’ve also had to softblock them several times to keep them away from me but they can't seem to take a hint and i genuinely have no idea why they're even doing this but i’m just so tired of not feeling safe and having to see some freak out there assume my online personality

TL;DR: tumblr user authorise has been stalking my social media accounts + plagiarising me but when i confronted them about it they played the victim and tried to make me the bad guy (again, ?????) for not tolerating their nonsense anymore

make of and do with this what you will and i know i shouldn't start any shit at my big age but i'm just utterly sick of this asshole and i needed people to be aware of what kind of person they really are😭

[paradoxicalloop]

Ok my friend(s) gave me the courage to post this because while I was originally hesitant to make do this because I was afraid of losing followers and my self-esteem plummeting because of it, I realized that if I do lose followers it isn’t a reflection of how people feel about me but rather the plain fact that I’m not going to give them the content they originally expected and came for. And that’s ok I don’t mind. Anyway the point is, I’m not going to be a sanders sides centered blog anymore. Yes I will still watch and enjoy new videos as they come out and I might even post about it occasionally, but other than that I don’t my blog to be as Sanders Sides focused as it is now.

So that begs the question; what will I be posting about now? And to that I say, I don’t know. Currently I’ve been really interested in Minecraft YouTube, specifically Dream SMP, yeah ik ik yet another fander turned mcyt stan wow so original. But I do already have a blog for that (@some-bread-roll check it out if you want to see me crying (/pos) about a tall British boy (Wilbur) and other mc youtubers sometimes I guess) so if I do post about mcyt on here it won’t be a frequent thing. My podcast content, well the little bit that I do share at least, will probably still reside on this blog, as well as whatever lgbtq+ content I deem worthy of being on the main blog instead of my spam (@paradoxicalv). And honestly I’m probably just going to post/reblog whatever I’m interested in and will try not to be tied down to one fandom on main. (Also if I’m gonna promote my sideblogs I might as will go for all 3; I sometimes post photography @paradoxical-photography (@ might change soon tho))

If you feel like unfollowing now that I have “left” the Sanders Sides fandom feel free no hard feelings, but also if you want to stay along for the ride that’s cool too!

Also, while both of my active blogs are sanders sides quotes, for now I will keep them as they are. Might change them if I come up with something better but I actually quite like them so we’ll see.

tl;dr I’m not a Sanders Sides blog anymore

[master-of-all-frogs]

The ultimate dysphoria override…

I have found a way to get rid of (a part of) my dysphoria. Please take ur time to read this because it might just help you!

So, I used to be a pretty hardcore truscum right. I had a lot of dysphoria and I HATED(!!!) being trans. I bitterly said things like ‘don’t romanticize being trans, being trans sucks it has ruined my life!’ and it had. I spent a lot of time, online and irl, with like minded people, and I genuinely thought it was helping me because I was finding people going through the same thing as me.

But here’s what I found.

Dysphoria is contagious. If your friends say they hate their body bc of dysphoria, you’ll start saying it too and you’ll believe it too eventually. It becomes a contest who suffers the most under being trans. I’m not saying that my dysphoria wasn’t genuine, or that I didn’t hate being trans from my core, but I’m saying that the environment I was in encouraged that part of me to take control until it was the only thing I could think of.

You know what’s also contagious? Romanticizing things.

I realised that no matter how hard I screamed I hated being trans, the fact that I was trans would never change. I have to spend the rest of my life being trans.

So I tried a different approach:

I blocked/unfollowed all social media accounts that talked about the severity of their dysphoria. I unfollowed all truscum accounts in general. I started following ‘tucute’ and ‘trendercore’ hashtags. I surrounded myself with people who love being trans, even if I did not agree with a lot of things, especially at the time (like having no dysphoria, neopronouns, not making an effort to pass). Their positivity and almost aggresive self love rubbed off on me. I started looking at art of and by trans people. I started reading books/stories with trans characters.

Now, I mostly associate me being trans with good things. And it has helped me so, so much.

I’m gonna be stuck with being trans for the rest of my life, so you bet your ass I’ll romanticize my trans identity until I start to love it

TL;DR:

broke: I hate being trans it has ruined my life

woke: I’ll be trans for the rest of my life, so instead of falling down this downwards spiral of self hatred I will purposely start to romanticize my trans identity and learn to be proud of being trans.

[best-science-dad-tony]

Are you all still active? And do you accept oc rp accounts or only canon based ones?

((Oh boy.

So here’s the thing...I’m probably not going to give these blogs quite the attention I did in the beginning, and I should explain why because you all deserve that.

At first, I didn’t think these things would go anywhere. I figured they’d be fun to play around with, banter, get some jokes in and see a few likes, maybe a reblog or two. But then they started gaining traction, and before I knew it, people were invested in my silly little accounts.

I wrote down a quick sketch of a plot and some ground rules for myself, rules that I intended to follow. I essentially wrote a post-Endgame story before Endgame after I saw Infinity War incorporating the elements I wanted to see in the next movie. At the time I was one person. No one was helping me. I knew I wanted to tell a story you all could participate in and enjoy, and to do that I thought it was best if I laid out a groundwork for myself on ways to do that. Things like resolving to answer every Ask, even if it was just to warn the person to stop what they were doing. To adopt every kid (at first that wasn’t on Anon but then I gave in). To give you guys Milestone rewards as thank yous, because even when I just hit fifty subscribers on Tony’s blog, I was ecstatic and appreciated you all so much, and felt like you deserved something so I could show you my gratitude. Unfortunately, before they went up...someone forced me to use one I wasn’t expecting. Literally right after I had made the rule for myself.

I told myself that if anyone found an Infinity Stone, it would be the one Tony had.

The Soul Stone.

I needed the Soul Stone for the plot to work, but I needed Tony to have a safety precaution around it too since Thanos was (is?) still alive. I told myself that if someone found out Tony had the Stone and wasn’t supposed to, he would have a way to protect it. So I had to use the solution I gave him: FRIDAY sending the Stone to an unknown planet with one of the Iron Man suits and promptly wiping her databanks of its location so Thanos or anyone else would be unable to find it. 

So someone found an Infinity Stone...and it was just...gone. Before I’d figured out how Tony would get it back.

My fellow Admins all know this. I can’t begin to tell you how many discussions I’ve had with them trying to write myself out of this hole. Usually, I’m pretty good at getting characters out of seemingly impossible situations...but I haven’t come up with anything that feels believable, that I feel like justifies the plot I have in mind or really respects the characters and who they are.

Normally I would have just gotten rid of the plot point of the Soul Stone being lost completely...but this isn’t an unfinished chapter in my Google Docs. It already happened. I can’t change it.

I don’t know if you guys have read Mercy by Stephen King or watched the movie, but it makes an excellent point that I strongly agree with:

Annie Wilkes : When I was growing up in Bakersfield, my favourite thing in the whole world was to go to the movies on Saturday afternoons for the Chapter Plays.

Paul Sheldon : [nodding]  Cliffhangers.

Annie Wilkes : [shouting]  I know that, Mr. Man! They also called them serials. I'm not stupid ya know... Anyway, my favourite was Rocketman, and once it was a no breaks chapter. The bad guy stuck him in a car on a mountain road and knocked him out and welded the door shut and tore out the brakes and started him to his death, and he woke up and tried to steer and tried to get out but the car went off a cliff before he could escape! And it crashed and burned and I was so upset and excited, and the next week, you better believe I was first in line. And they always start with the end of the last week. And there was Rocketman, trying to get out, and here comes the cliff, and just before the car went off the cliff, he jumped free! And all the kids cheered! But I didn't cheer. I stood right up and started shouting. This isn't what happened last week! Have you all got amnesia? They just cheated us! This isn't fair! HE DID'NT GET OUT OF THE COCK - A - DOODIE CAR!

Paul Sheldon : [long pause]  They always cheated like that in cl... chapter plays.

I don’t want to cheat you all. As arrogant as it might sound, I think I’m a better writer than that. And you all certainly deserve better than that.

When I went to see Endgame (in full Tony Stark cosplay, might I add), I hoped to find inspiration to continue. And let’s just say that ending killed a part of me and I’m still dealing with nightmares and panic attacks over it. My mom asked me if I wanted an Avengers cake for my 22nd birthday and I burst into tears. I just...I can’t handle it right now.

But I recently got my inspiration back for this plot. I remembered how much I loved my ideas, the little timeline I had laid out for myself. I remembered how much fun it was for Tony and Stephen to interact with their kids, for Thor and Loki to talk to Midgardians. I remembered how much fun it was to use obscure ships. And I want to do it. For those reasons, I want to come back to it. I want to see that plot through to the end of the line, whatever that may be.

So I’ve added some elements, and I’ve decided to go in with firmer rules than I had at the beginning, where I would let anyone tell Tony and Stephen “yeah, so...I’ve been stabbed, ‘sup with you guys lol”.

The catch is...it won’t be on these blogs.

It would mean going through everything on them and pretending it didn’t happen, which hardly seems fair, especially when so many people still like and reblog some of my more popular posts. It doesn’t seem fair to just throw all of that away.

Like I said, I don’t want to cheat you, and doing that feels like cheating to me.

So instead I’m starting over. I’m in the process of setting up new blogs, a new Discord server, and I’m working with my Admins to put these new blogs into place.

The other big twist is...I won’t be advertising them here.

I don’t want you all to think I don’t value and appreciate all your kindness and support.

But I don’t want you all to join those new blogs just because I made a joke on Bucky’s account (in this set of blogs) that you liked. I want you to join because you’re invested, because you enjoy the interactions, because you like my writing for what it is and not just because it’s me typing it. It’s the same reason I have a separate AO3 account I never share.

I feel proud when people come to these blogs and see Tony confronting Steve and find out I was writing both of them, not bouncing off a fellow Admin.

I hope I don’t sound ungrateful. I’m swear not. But I want the new blogs to earn their following just like these did. You all saw something in these blogs, whether it was a joke, some advice; something that meant something to you. Maybe you saw family. Maybe you saw a friend. I don’t know. But I sincerely hope that whatever it was, I earned that follow from you. That I earned those likes and reblogs of my own volition.

All I ask of you is if you want to see where these new blogs will go, if you want to follow them, if you find them, please, don’t spoil what will happen for any newcomers who join the ranks. Certain plotpoints will carry over. I want any new fans to be as invested and surprised as you were.

Maybe one day I’ll tell you where the plot moved if you can’t find it and you want to know the big picture. Maybe you’ll just unfollow me or ignore the fact that I’m working on something else.

But I’m not going to just up and abandon these blogs. For a long time, they meant something to me, and at least to some of you. They’ll stay up, and I’ll answer your asks and engage with you. I can’t speak for the other Admins. But with me, you’ll always have someone to message, even if I take forever. But no more nitty-gritty plot. We’ll say Thanos got tired of holding Quill prisoner and fucked off somewhere. These blogs are now just for lighthearted family fun.

This is a long-winded rant to say that yes, I am still active in some ways, and I’m not in others.

As for OC accounts, they have always been welcome, but they don’t get put on the Masterlist or get OC-centric plots. Just be sure to follow certain rules- like Tony having no biological children.

I’m sorry for the rant.

TL;DR: I’m making new blogs to write this plot as I originally intended, but these will stay up and you can message them (at least mine). Also, OCs are cool and always welcome. ~Admin Chara))

[feanor-the-dragon]

So I guess that I need to address something

I have received, over the last 48 hours, a number of perhaps well-meaning messages accusing me of being both a terrible person and an art thief.

I may indeed be a terrible person (who am I to judge my own character? Can I be trusted to do so without bias?), but I am not an art thief.

So friends, enemies, ambivalent readers who don’t really care one way or the other, and one/several well-meaning but overly-hostile anon(s), please allow me to clear something up: I am @artist-the-dragon. That is my art blog. I have many side blogs, all of which follow the same naming convention, “[very obtuse single-word name about the theme of the blog]-the-dragon,” including such subtle brilliance as @dungeon-the-dragon, where I make DnD posts, @science-the-dragon, where I post about science and engineering stuff, and @fiction-the-dragon, where I post about writerly things. I keep many sideblogs, and sometimes, I mix them up or accidentally make a post to my main instead of the sideblog... like I did with the post where I allege that my drawing of the muppet-headed dragon who skipped leg day “is objectively my best art post, yall are just cowards,” which I believe is what started this mess.

I appreciate the fact that yall let me know over at @artist-the-dragon, however, I am absolutely mortified at the idea that if someone actually had been stealing my art, you would have sent absolutely ludicrously vicious anon hate to that person in my name. Rest assured, I am an adult who can pick my own battles, and who would like to choose for myself the level of incivility to which I will escalate the issue.

I don’t know why I keep having to say this, but the words “kill yourself,” or any variation thereof, better not ever fly from the keyboards of any of my followers and into anyone else’s inbox. I don’t care what the reason for it is. That phrase is the absolute worst thing you can ever say to anyone, and it reflects very poorly on your character when you do. And you damn-sure better not ever use language like that in my defense. Ever. Period. That isn’t okay. I’ve discussed at length why it isn’t okay several times. Cool it the fuck down.

Now, I’m grateful that I have concerned followers who want to let me know about it when they see someone who seems to be stealing my art. That’s good, and you absolutely should let an artist know if it looks like someone is reposting that artist’s work without credit and claiming it as their own, because that sort of shit is not okay to do either. But please, I promise that I am not stealing art from @artist-the-dragon.

So please, please, please... I would very much like to stop receiving hatemail in my inbox written on my own behalf. While it is an amusing thing to think about, it is also very confusing to get.

This has been a PSA. Thank you. That is all.

Tl/dr: I am @artist-the-dragon, and @artist-the-dragon is me. I haven’t stolen anyone’s art. And if you think that it is ever acceptable to tell a person to kill themselves, that they’re worthless, and that no one will ever love them, then you better unfollow me right the fuck now, because I will not have that kind of needlessly hateful behavior being in any way associated with me.

[ddaenggtan]

about ddaenggtan

✧ WHADDUP my name’s bette (not really), i’m 24, and i never fucking learned how to read write ✧

click here to go back to my full nav

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ me  ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

✧ bette. she/her, but i don’t mind they/them.

✧ i’m in est, and i live in the mid-south usa

✧ 24. libra. year of the pig. (pisces moon and gemini rising, if ur curious)

✧ the gayest bisexual you’ll ever meet, except when it comes to bts

✧ engayged and i talk about her a LOT

✧ i write fic and whine about how bts exists and yet i’m not their friend

✧ ot7 biased

✧ adhd + anxiety + depression + chronic pain ftw

✧ i don’t do tag lists bc i can barely remember to link my ao3 in those posts

✧ i’m a kinky bitch and i am not afraid to be horny on main on this sideblog

✧ if you find my main rip you i’ve had it since 2008 and it’s a clusterfuck 

✧ bts is the only kpop group i stan, but i listen to several others casually. i also really fucking love hozier.

✧ i really fucking love space. like,,,,,,it’s a little alarming. i love it so much tho.

✧ i play a ridiculous amount of video games, and run a D&D campaign for fun

✧ i collect clue games. like. the board game. because i’m weird and a nerd.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ things to know  ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

✧ i’m very politically opinionated and i tend to keep it off this blog and strictly on my main, but you’re definitely gonna hear me bitch about the president at least a little

✧ you’re also gonna get some Moral Lessons in my fic because it’s basically impossible for me not to preach about how people deserve to live without justifying their existence in the world, and also how people should be treated with respect

✧ i don’t do any kind of non-con, because that’s just straight up sexual assault and i literally do a charity every year to bring attention to how much of a fucking problem that already is in the world today. 

✧ i might occasionally tag something as dub-con, but i can guarantee you that it isn’t actually dub-con, because consent that isn’t given freely and enthusiastically is not consent uwu

✧ i firmly believe that teenagers have the right to read and even write erotic/smutty material because for a lot of people, that’s the only chance they have to explore their sexuality and what it means to them. that said, please do not interact with me if you are not of age (preferably at least twenty tbh) because you all are fantastic and lovely and i cannot wait to see what you do in the world, but i am not comfortable talking to minors on a blog where i write smut

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ things to avoid  ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

✧ homophobia, transphobia, biphobia, ace/aro-phobia (ace/aro people are part of the lgbt community and i will not debate that with you, and will in fact unfollow if you start doing any kind of discourse about that fact). i’m literally one of the biggest supporters of my queer siblings and i will fight for them. 

✧ racism, of any kind, be it anti-semitism, xenophobia, anti-blackness, any of it. i make a lot of jokes about white people because i am a white girl, and we’re ridiculously privileged, and also jokes about white people are funny as shit. 

✧ fetishization of anyone, particularly of wlw, mlm, and non-white people. queer people aren’t your kink, and poc are not ‘exotic’       ✧ on that note, do not follow if you support whitewashing, because it’s gross       ✧ also FUCK h*adl*ner and fuck  m*m*btsgh*st and fuck all sasaengs

✧ don’t follow if you actually ship real people together, it’s not cute, it’s fetishization and it’s gross, and i remember the 1d days too well for that shit. i may occasionally write mxm fics, but that’s doubtful, and even if i do, i can guarantee you i do not ship them in any real way together and instead essentially use them as a storytelling medium. 

✧ any kind of body-non-positivity, because it is a FACT that ugly does not exist except in personalities. seriously, i’m literally a fat girl, if you come on here trying to talk shit about fat people, you’re gonna get destroyed. and don’t come here saying anything about thinner people either, because that’s not alright, and i will shut you down just the same. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ tl;dr be respectful and we’re chill  ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

[ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff]

Author’s Note: Update on Hiatus

Do not reblog this post. I don’t want any “discourse” from it. Fair warning, this is a long post. Tl;dr at the end.

Unfortunately, within the last few months especially, I received a number of hateful messages concerning Jack Lowden’s relationship status. They were rude to me for not believing their “evidence” that he might be dating someone else when I said I didn’t want to assume, and hating on my writing in general. To say the least, this was very disheartening.

To make it clear again: yes, I do have a crush on Jack. I am not entitled to anything from him just because I like him and his work. I will not be going on a jealous rage that leads to harassment and hate should he date someone. I simply admire him from afar and take inspiration from his media persona as a muse of sorts.

However, due to the amount of messages and their content, I began to associate Jack with those anonymous messages. I would feel sick with anxiety for hours because all I would think about would be those messages. Someone who is a small hero of mine was ruined by hateful people who didn’t even have the guts to show their faces, who had nothing better to do than to insult a blog they could very easily not look at. Writing, my everyday hobby, was soiled because my most frequent muse (Jack and all his characters) was tainted with hatred. I could no longer do something I loved or think of someone I respected without having an anxiety attack.

So I went on hiatus with his tags filtered and accounts unfollowed so that nothing would trigger me. Sporadic posts on my blog are simply to entertain myself. I still used Tumblr to talk to my friends and they have been very understanding. The fear that I would lose relevancy faded in favour of boosting my health because I want to be able to enjoy things and I’ll do whatever it takes to do so.

As of now, the messages have stopped. More recently, I’ve attempted to ease myself back onto social media. No longer do I feel overly sick or anxious when I see a post Jack has made. This of course does not mean I’m better, merely that I am on my way to recovery.

I will be returning to writing; I will do my anniversary blurb prompt list and 1k follower blog recommendation too. I just don’t know when. I have had the posts in my draft for a while. I hit 1k followers two weeks ago but I was not ready to make it known and receive any messages.

Once they are both done, requests will be to a minimum. Instead of constant requests, I will upload my own fics and the occasional request if I feel inspired. There were times I wrote requests I was uncomfortable with and I’m not proud of that. I don’t know if I will delete them. To delete would give the impression it was never there and I have a perfect record – obviously not true, I’m only human and I make mistakes. However I’m not so comfortable those staying up to reflect me.

I’ve already made it known that I don’t accept requests for certain people due to age and marital status but that their characters are fine. This might apply to all those I write for in future in terms of RPF. It’s a creative choice – sticking with characters that I can interpret as I please, established or OCs. But I’ll keep you updated on that.

When I get back to writing, I will not be uploading every day. It was fun and I loved almost being a frequent writer but it slowly grew unhealthy, where I would avoid real life interactions to meet a “deadline” and my happiness would depend on how many notes I got. That is not the motivation I want. I will upload as I please. Any messages that only ask when I’m updating will promptly be ignored and deleted. I’m setting boundaries for myself so that I don’t render this hobby to become unhealthy and so that I can focus on my education and my work.

If you did send those messages, insulting my work or abusing the use of anonymous messaging to plague me for not believing your “evidence” of someone dating another acquired through invasive action, I forgive you. But I won’t forget you, and if you do come to my inbox again, I will block you without hesitation.

Thank you if you read this whole thing. I just wanted to make it known since I never made it officially known I was on hiatus. 

tl;dr I had a break for mental health reasons, I’m doing better, I’ll get back to writing in the future but I don’t know when, requests will be bare minimum, I’m hyped to see MFM in a month and a bit.

[ashleybear-hat]

Practicing new way of coloring ft my best friend! ><

SO KINDA IMPORTANT THINGS BELOW: I know that this blog is multifandom, as in there are a few ships and such that I post here, some of them are old stuff that I rarely made anymore

So that’s the thing...I’ve been leaving fandoms left and right, not feeling the same rush I used to feel. But I still draw them, rarely though, just when I feel like drawing it. So I kinda feel bad? I mean, you guys follow me because of specific stuff and I’m not sure... I just want you guys to feel happy but idk how to split my art into the fandoms I’m in since this blog is kind of a mess...lol

BUT, this is my main art blog, so I feel like I will post of my art here, that doesn’t relate to any particular fandom (like this one). I hope you guys are okay with that... I will still make the OTP prompts, those are my favorites I can’t abandon them TT, and “Growing Up with Rosie” will still be going. But the rest...I’m not sure. I will just post on things that I feel like drawing, so I guess this blog will be a lot more “pure” art (?). Instead of just fandom stuff.

TL;DR : I wanted to make this blog more like MY art blog instead of just filled with fandom stuff (doesn’t mean that I will stop posting fandom and shipping stuff), I will just post more with what I feel like drawing

I hope you guys understand my choice, and if you guys want to unfollow me it’s fine I totally understand ^^ and for those who stayed, thank you, I will keep doing my best <3  -Ashley

[today-only-happens-once]

In which Grae talks for way too long about how much the fanders mean to her

Somehow, for some reason that I don’t understand... 1500+ of you follow me now. Why you follow this frequently frazzled writer, I do not know. But I am grateful. I am so deeply, deeply grateful for you and that you’re here. I’m... speechless. I’m honored. I hope that whatever content you’re enjoying here, I’m able to keep producing it/reblogging it/sharing it with all of you. 

The rest of this post is going to be very long and emotional and honest. I OVERSHARE A LOT IN THIS IM SORRY. Once I got talking/writing, it was hard to stop until the end.

tl;dr version: I platonically love all you fanders so freaking much, and you’ve all done more for me than you realize. 

I found Thomas Sanders’ content on YouTube in part because a blog I followed for Supernatural turned into a fanders blog, and I never unfollowed them because I just enjoyed their presence on my dash. One day last fall, I had some time to kill and thought I’d find out what this “Sanders Sides” business was all about. And I enjoyed it well enough. I watched when the 12 Days episode aired. I still wasn’t really part of the fandom, though, and hadn’t watched much of his videos other than that. I was a “casual fan”, I guess. 

Then during that last-few-days-of-January/first-few-days-of-February week, I had a rough week. I had been in a relationship for over 5 years with a guy I loved very much, and the relationship disintegrated in the course of a week and I felt pretty blindsided by it. It was... not a good time for me. I was crying at least once every day,  having a hard time focusing in my classes, hated going to sleep because I wanted to keep myself busy and my mind occupied, etc. When I finally pushed him for an answer instead of holding the relationship in “I don’t know if I want a relationship anymore” limbo, he broke up with me. 

During that week, I’d found myself turning a bit towards the Sides as a way to cope and work through it all. And a few days after the break-up... well, I’m still not quite sure how it happened, exactly. Maybe it’s because later that same day was when Thomas posted the “Can Lying Be Good??” video. Or maybe it was going to happen either way. But I just... fell into the fanders here on tumblr. I hadn’t been using my supernatural blog much anymore, and decided to revamp it into a fanders one.

It’s been one of the best decisions I could have made for myself. And that’s because of you.

Any break-up is hard. I had never been through one before. And the longer the relationship is, the harder ending it can be. Especially when it isn’t mutual, and you don’t see it coming. Heartbreak like that isn’t something that is easy to put into words. Healing from that is something I am still learning how to do. But you have helped me with it. More than you know.

This is probably more of my “fanders story” so to speak than any of you really cared to know. But it felt important to me to at least try to explain where I was coming from emotionally when I fell into this fandom’s arms. Because landing here meant and means something really important to me.

Finding the fanders has meant landing softly into the most warm, supportive, and protective group of people I have ever seen online. The positivity here, the support of one another, the reassurances you all give to one another--have given to me--means more to me than I believe I am capable of expressing in a singular post. My dearest fanders, I found you when I needed you most, and I will never stop being grateful for you. Each and every one of you that works to make and keep the fanders the kind of environment that has helped me and loved me and supported me. 

Even when I recently learned that my ex is now engaged to another girl already (I had known they were close friends and now suspect something... more may have been occurring), you all were there. I’m still working through some things emotionally, but just... you’re all there. Even by just carrying on as normal... “normal” in the fanders is what keeps me moving forward. You all help remind me that there are kind, good, and sincere people out there. You keep me from turning completely cynical. You’ve helped remind me to be... soft. You all remind me that softness and kindness in the face of hard times can sometimes be the best and most important thing. And that’s made a huge impact in my life. It just has.

You all also did a lot to help me feel at home with things I learned about myself that I was afraid to admit to before. I suspected I was demisexual for... a long time. But I kept shoving the thought away, telling myself that it didn’t matter anyway because I was in a committed relationship with someone I loved and was attracted to so what did it matter? (Note to past self: you are allowed to want to know who you are regardless of your relationship status) I had had a few hard conversations with people that, only in hindsight, probably should have tipped me off that I was demi. But like I said: I kept telling myself it didn’t matter. Or that everyone felt attraction the way I do (another note to past self: they don’t). 

But after the break-up and seeing how accepting and supportive and loving this community of fanders are... it helped me feel more at ease with myself and my sexuality. And now June, Pride Month, is about to start. And even though I’m not out to anyone but tumblr, my sister, one friend, and a table of a random LGBT+ people at the ace awareness table during my college’s pride week... I do feel proud of who I am. And that’s in large part because of you all. 

I cannot stress enough how much of a difference you make to others. You’ve all helped me and inspired the best in me, and helped me accept myself in ways I hadn’t wanted to before falling in with all of you. And whether we’re friends or I’ve never talked to you before, if you’re part of this community? You’ve made this difference to me. 

I love you all so much. And with my entire heart, know that I am grateful for you. You specifically.

[jessgartner]

Leaving Facebook Part III: Goodbye to All That

Remember what it was to be me: that is always the point. 

I'm in the final countdown to deleting Facebook, and not a moment too soon.

TL;DR:

Primary posts will be here

I'll be sending out a monthly Life Olympics newsletter

If you want email, mail, and/or newsletters, let me know where to find you

I think we are well advised to keep on nodding terms with the people we used to be, whether we find them attractive company or not.

The Wind-Down

I've backed up my data, I've collected contact info, and I've explored a variety of new platforms with varying degrees of success.

I've reached a tentative consensus on my plan for moving forward. It's a little more complex than I would have liked, but I'm settling into some new habits and I'll continue to iterate and refine over time. Here's where I've landed:

Nothing was irrevocable; everything was within reach. Just around every corner lay something curious and interesting, something I had never before seen or done or known about. 

Consuming

I chose: Apple News. I slept on this for a while, for reasons I can't totally remember. I revisited it and spent some time customizing it and decided it's the best newsfeed for me for now.

Pros:

Free

UX is good and it's easy to follow publications/topics

iCloud syncing across devices + desktop app is hard to beat. The next best product I looked at (Thread News) only had a mobile app, which was a dealbreaker for me.

I follow mostly mainstream-is publications and there's a full database of sources that are easy to follow.

I haven't tried News+ yet but I like the option of it - a while ago I had a similar magazine aggregator from Conde Nast that I loved and this seems similar or better.

Cons:

Initially, I didn't like the Top Stories on the home page. I don't really love the CNN/ABC/CBS-type focus on 24-hour headline news and wish this was better curated from my interests and favorite publications. I finally figured out that you can limit the Home Page to publications that you follow, but it's not an obvious setting.

I hate that share/copy link produces an apple.news url instead of the native url; this is obnoxious.

Runner Up: Thread News had a really nice Daily Digest feature that curated from your favorite publications.

I chose: Pocket for random articles that I come across on Twitter, in Slack, or recommended through text messages, I save them to Pocket to read later.

Pros:

Free (with premium paid option)

Syncs across desktop, mobile, iPad app; app UX is nicely optimized across devices

Tagging (good for saving favorites)

"Article view" that clears out web junk for a streamlined reading experience

Chrome extension for easy clipping/adding

Cons:

None yet; it's simple and works the way I want it to

Runner up: Instapaper. It has very similar functionality to Pocket, I just slightly prefer the design of Pocket. If you like a really minimalist reading experience, Instapaper is for you.

Keepers of private notebooks are a different breed altogether, lonely and resistant rearrangers of things, anxious malcontents, children afflicted apparently at birth with some presentiment of loss.

Creating

This one was a beast. I struggled for weeks to parse out exactly what I wanted on this front and which criteria were most important to me, because it became clear quickly that I wasn't going to get everything I wanted in one place.

I chose: Tumblr I initially wrote this off because the homepage/discovery can be nauseating without the right default settings. A tour of the mobile version convinced me to give this a second look: the mobile app is great and the posting experience is (pardon the cliche) delightful. I decided to give it a deeper dive behind the scenes and found that I was able to customize a lot of what I initially disliked. The auto formatting for photo, quote, link, and chat posts is charming and simple.

Pros:

Customizing themes is simple and there are a lot of choices.

I can use my personal domain

The posting experience is easy and relatively error-free

The tagging! I love my tags and they work so nicely. I was also able to find a theme that features tags so you will always have easy access to the latest photos of Darwin.

Great for multimedia posting

Built-in share buttons

Cons:

Not very good at importing content from other platforms; I manually recreated a few favorite posts, but otherwise pretty much had to start from scratch on content

No built-in analytics, aside from follower counts, which is not something I expect to care about or track. I set up tracking on Google Analytics, but I'll miss the built-in analytics that WordPress had. Since WP bought Tumblr, I'm hoping that they may eventually add these features to Tumblr

I just don't care about the social/discovery components here and I wish I could turn them off

Ads. I wish I could pay to make them go away.

Runner up: micro.blog For the first couple of weeks, I thought this was going to be my choice. I had a solid experience importing and archiving a lot of my content from WordPress, Instagram, and Medium. Unfortunately, once I started trying to use the platform on a daily basis, I ran into a lot of issues and challenges that gave me pause on using and recommending the platform. To be clear, a good number of these issues were either user-error or bespoke preferences due to my personal quirks on how I want to organize and share content on the Internet. Some of this is a result of it being a new-ish platform that still has some blind spots for non-developers; it's not a mainstream product yet and I'm not sure it's trying to be. Based on my personal preferences, I felt Tumblr was slightly better equipped for my use case. I'm still going to keep using micro.blog for a while in tandem with Tumblr to see if my preferences change and/or if the platform adopts some of the feedback I shared with regard to cross-posting and UX.

I chose: Drafts. One big challenge for me in this process was the desire to cross-post some content in multiple places while limiting where I post other content. I didn't want to fill my Twitter feed with cat pictures, but I wanted some little corner of the Internet for Darwin's biggest fans (my mother). Drafts is basically a universal text editor that pushes drafts of text to a variety of services, including micro.blog, Twitter, Day One, Google Drive, Evernote, WordPress, Gmail, and even text messages. It's highly configurable and I'm only just scratching the surface of its power. Creating text drafts here allows me to easily push drafts to a variety of different places with just a few keystrokes. It syncs with iCloud, has really robust tagging and filtering, and has mobile, iPad, and Mac apps. It's very cool.

He laughed literally until he choked, and I had to roll down the taxi window and hit him on the back. "New faces," he said finally, "don't tell me about new faces.” 

Engagement

I chose: Twitter I've increasingly found Twitter to be a place where my friends/followers care about what I care about. The messages I care most about sharing are amplified. I can choose to unfollow, mute, or block people who are harassing or distressing me. I can follow people whose expertise I value. It can still be a cesspool at times but Twitter leadership seems to be taking steps to improve the platform - identifying misinformation, a conversation feature that limits replies, etc. For now, it stays.

Coming Soon: Substack I haven't officially started this yet, but I'm going to start a monthly newsletter that (allegedly) goes out the first Sunday of every month. I'm going to use roughly my annual Life Olympics format except there will be fun and exciting recommendations. Teaser: new Life Olympics categories will make their debut in the first installment on July 5! If you want it, make sure you give me your email address and you'll receive the first edition.

It’s easy to see the beginnings of things, and harder to see the ends.

All quotes by Joan Didion, Slouching Towards Bethlehem

Many, many thanks to Jason Becker for his recommendations, patience, and tech support on this project.

[bionic-bat-archive]

                          “ON THIS DAY OF OUR ASCENSION  ON THIS DAY WE PRAISE THE FALLEN”

Lee Gwang-Min is the founder of the international special operations division U.M.B.R.A. A team of experts that track and eradicate international and extraterrestrial threats.  

However, Lee Gwang-Min has one secret, one that he has carried for over a thousand years...

The only person who knows it is the person that helped him Transcend, however, the risk of exposure looms over him as well as the price of immortality...

INFO & CONTACT ☯ CANON/AU/OC-FRIENDLY  ☯  MULTI-PARA LIT  ☯   SINGLE-VERSE

RULES AND OTHER INFO (PLEASE READ):

Ancient History: 

Wang So is the 4th Prince (and later monarch) of Goryeo. At a young age, King Taejo Wang Geon sent him to be adopted in order to maintain peace amid the political chaos. His life was spent brutally learning the ways of warfare and earned the reputation of a “Bloodthirsty Prince” and “Kumiho”.

Those rumors of his ruthlessness grew upon the arrival of a mysterious foreign Queen known as “The Wolf Queen.” Many believe The Wolf Queen is an evil spirit sent to destroy Goryeo and that Wang So made a pact with her in exchange for power on the battlefield. 

Some believe that power came at the cost of his soul.

Others- those that are closest to the royal family and the Kings- believe that the royal line has ties to the heavens.

What is truth or lies remains unknown as many fear to find out…

This character is the modern version of 4th Prince Wang So (Emporer Gwangjong) 

See THIS POST AND THE CHARACTER PAGE for his details.

CHARACTER INFO:

FC: Lee Jun Ki

S/O:  Straight

R/S: Ask me!

ALL INTERACTIONS WITH HIM OR ANY OF MY MUSES MAY CONTAIN TRIGGERING OR OTHER CONTENT NOT SUITABLE FOR YOUNGER PEOPLE.

PLEASE SEE MY RULES BELOW.

ABOUT THE WRITER:

Morgan, 25, she/her, has 10+ years writing experience. Loves to chat, write and RP. Mega geeky and very friendly!

I am mostly para/novel type of a writer. I don’t really do one liners with some exceptions. I prefer writers that are good with grammar and punctuation (I’m not perfect at this, but, I try ^_^).

If English is not your first language, I can make an exception, just please put in the effort.

(feel free to like this if interested and I’ll come to you!)

reblogs are appreciated!

Base image is used with permission by: @allaboutjoongi

Thank you!!

ps: if you want to RP but don’t know how to feel free to message me and I can teach you! it’s easy!

RULES

BASICS:

MUN AND MUSES ARE ALL 21+. DUE TO MATURE SUBJECT MATTER, I WILL ONLY INTERACT WITH MUNS/MUSES THAT ARE 21+ Internationally (18+ U.S.) unless underage muses have been pre-plotted.

PLEASE READ MY MUSE SECTION BEFORE INTERACTING.

ALL IC ASKS MUST STATE WHO THE ASK IS ADDRESSED TO. If you have no preference then put in “*”.

IF THE ASK IS ADDRESSED TO ME (THE WRITER) PUT “TO MUN” IN THE ASK.

No Godmodding

I will (try) to schedule all replies to post automatically at 12 A.M. MST every Monday. (However, I might reply more frequently/slower depending on how I feel)

This is both an IC and OOC blog (because I don’t give enough fucks to make a blog for personal shit.)

THREADS/ASKS:

I am selective about who I will thread with and might drop threads if I feel uninspired to write them. THIS IS NOTHING PERSONAL AND SHOULD NOT DISCOURAGE YOU FROM TALKING TO ME IN FUTURE OR SENDING ASKS!

I prefer to only thread when I have a plot and storyline.

If you don’t have a plot or story in mind (and we can’t come up with one together) feel free to send me an IC Ask and/or meme instead.

I’m always willing to try and plot but I CANNOT PROMISE MY MUSES WILL COOPERATE.

I DON’T DO FOLLOW STARTERS. PLEASE EITHER IM ME OR SEND AN ASK IF YOU WANT TO THREAD. (See above about threads.)

I can rarely wing it but I will try if need be.

I AM ALWAYS OPEN TO IC/OOC ASKS & MEMES.

(seriously, chat with me I love to talk. 🌸 ),

I AM OPEN TO ALL SORTS OF PLOTS EXCEPT FOR THE FOLLOWING:

No slice of life

No high school/college AUs.

No domestic-base AUs.

My brain can’t handle mundane non-fantasy scenarios.

BETTER YET, LET’S JUST SAY I DO NOT DO AU’S AT ALL WITHOUT HEAVY PLOTTING.

MUSES:

ALL MY CHARACTERS ARE INTERCONNECTED AND HAVE A PRE-ESTABLISHED STORYLINE.

I will ONLY ship if the characters have chemistry!

I AM SINGLE SHIP/VERSE.

I am always open to different types of relationships: friends, enemies, etc…

I WILL NOT sugar coat my muses behavior!

My muses have the right to attack and/or try to kill yours if they feel threatened (or in some cases) if the muse goes against cultural/period norms.

Some of my muses have 800+ years of military/espionage experience, and supernatural abilities. I will play them based on common sense. (Example: If your muse is a 30-year-old Marine, or 100-year-old vampire and tries to attack one of my 800+-year-old muses, odds are you won’t win. Not god moddy, just realistic.)

GENRES I WRITE:

Thrillers, Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Historical, Crime/Thriller/Espionage.

TRIGGERS:

I don’t tag my stuff that being said I WILL ONLY TAG TRIGGERS UPON REQUEST.

I will not RP graphic torture (implied and some graphic things are OK) or anything “mature” involving characters under 21.

I will NEVER RP anything involving animal death/cruelty/abuse or mature subject matter with characters under 21. (18 U.S.)

NO MARY/GARY SUES/SELF-INSERTS. PLEASE JUST DON’T.

I prefer interacting with the muns OOC and building a solid means of communication. That being said, I also have anxiety and don’t do well with reclusive/sporadically active muns.

If I’m interested in a plot and our muses click I can become a bit attached with the writer especially if we hit it off well, and like a lot of activity and chatting.

That’s not to say I’m pushy/annoying about it (I know we all have lives) just PLEASE give me an idea of your activity before hand. My anxiety disorder and I will thank you.

That being said, if you prefer to keep some distance, that’s fine, but please have the courtesy to let me know about your boundaries. I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable.

Last thing, no ooc drama, don’t waste my time. If you send hate I’ll either reply IC or just ignore it all together. So do yourself a favor and unfollow me if you have an issue with my blog.

If you read to the end, please send a 🌸 (Sakura if mobile) as soon as either I or you approach for RPs. This will tell me if you read the rules or not.

TL;DR: I’M MOSTLY OPEN TO ANYTHING. I AM SELECTIVE WITH THREADS, BUT LOVE TO CHAT IC AND OOC WITH PEOPLE.

PLEASE PLOT WITH ME IF YOU WANT TO DO ANYTHING MORE THAN JUST FUN LITTLE THINGS.

[avicebro]

sappy shit

this is going to be sappy and I’m just warning you in advance:

tw: depression, ptsd, suicide

As it is my birthday I have been doing a lot of reflection on what a year really does, and this year has been a lot of changes. This is really just me oversharing, so if you want a tl;dr: I am better now, and if you follow any of my blogs, thank you so much. I love you all.

Anyways. I’ve been into fate for over a year now. I binge-watched both /Zero and UBW in the span of four days in the winter of 2016, played both /Stay Night and /Hollow Ataraxia by last August, and read the entirety of Fate/Strange Fake up to what had been translated by September. Since then I’ve been slowly chipping away at the rest of the fate content, working through everything and anything I could get my hands on as I waited for the next installment.

Fate/ was the reason why I wanted to start drawing more – Diarmuid specifically. I loved these characters so much, that me, a person dubbed as uncreative and a bad artist, bought a tablet and started working hard. I will not lie – my first published drawings were nothing but tracing work. When I did publish anything that was freehand, I did so very cautiously. It was a lot for me to pull my tablet out and practice, but I did so in order to work harder.

When dailyarturia opened up so that more daily fate blogs could be created, I jumped on it immediately. I made dailycaren (it’s deleted now) and drew everyday. That blog got no notes. I felt like an idiot and felt my art was even worse. I decided to delete it and restart with dailymashu, and eventually because of some attention one of my Medea posts got I then made dailymedea. Through these two blogs I’ve met some amazing people, made new friends who I can’t wait to meet in real life, gained some wonderful followers and I have a lot of love for both of those blogs, and all the others I have ran or run now.

Why these blogs were so important to me is because in under a year my life was not ok. I was cramped in a tiny apartment with my boyfriend at the time because at home I had to live with my abuser. He was not a good boyfriend for my needs and I found myself having the worst months of my life. My parents pressured me to get a job when all I wanted to do is die. When I went back to school, a new therapist (who is actually good) made me think of things I hadn’t considered before. I was tired and slept after classes because I couldn’t sleep at night with my PTSD. My grades tanked and for one of my courses, I had failed both midterms and the lab final (how I passed is still a mystery).

I told my therapist that after the first Heaven’s Feel movie I would kill myself.

I didn’t even care about watching the rest of the films – the first film would be enough for me to see if Sakura, a character who I had projected myself onto for so long because of our similar histories, was in good hands. Then I would commit suicide. I saw her story, and subsequently Caren’s after I played Hollow Ataraxia, as dreams that weren’t possible. Yet I still wanted to see if she’d be ok.

The daily blogs forced me to get up and draw. I was so worried that people would unfollow the daily blogs if I didn’t draw for them, if I didn’t make them happy. I drew to make people happy when I couldn’t do it for myself. I drew every day for dailymashu for a long time, which surprised me to no end. Yet these blogs made me do something instead of curling myself into a ball under some sheets and wish for death.

Through the blogs I got to meet some amazing people, from the other mods to my followers to some awesome rp-blogs and discord channels. I had people who cared for me. I came out of the closet as trans and started working through to start on hormone replacement therapy. I broke up with my boyfriend who would reintroduce trauma for me, and I finally worked through my own problems with liking a character that reminded me so much of my abuser.

I won’t say that everything was peachy – I’ve had bad days of course. I’ve been swept up in unnecessary drama that I wish I could redo, I’ve been petty over things that in the long term don’t matter, I’ve blocked and unblocked people and cut relationships off. It isn’t all from fate either, having come out has greatly improved my mental health as well.

However, I’ve met people who say I handle with my PTSD very well. Which seems so outlandish when last December I was going to drop out of university and go to a mental health facility for two months. It seems so weird because last year I had a plan to die. It seems so weird when my PTSD took over my entire life. That’s why I say so much has happened in the last year. I have almost become a new person.

Anyways. If you read this, thanks. If you follow me or any of the blogs I run, thank you. If you message me pictures of Kirei or Caren, thanks, I really do love those. I love you all,

Alistair.