#tittyballs

[missypapageorge]

#tittyball #varsity https://www.instagram.com/p/BqTuA9pAHI-/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=19hon80m1k5ut

[courtneyb-tv]

Don't worry bout it 💃🏼✊🏻🚺 #sweetfallopes #womensmarch #womensmarchonwashington #tittyballs #feminism (at Washington, District of Columbia)

[elmomachete]

Wrestlemania XXXV Predictions.

Yeah, yeah, they don’t use the Roman numerals anymore. They don’t even use regular numerals. Humor me, it’s out of habit. I actually watched most of NXT Takeover last night, mostly live. I’m still not entirely sold on Blackochet or Matt Riddle, but the War Raiders and Velveteen Dream are the tittyballs and so were both matches. I fell asleep during the UK Championship match and intended to finish the show this morning, but then the results were spoiled for me by Cageside Seats in article headlines. Weak sauce, gentlemen. The weakest of sauces. Oh well, I’ll finish the show eventually. Anyway, with a 42 match card, the pre-show is liable to start any minute now so I better get these predictions up before all the poor souls in New Jersey (I’m sorry, I meant “New York”) start freezing their asses off. Let’s get prognosticating, shall we? Fabulous Moolah Memorial Women’s Battle Royale Totally not promoting human trafficking since 2018. Who won last year, Naomi? It’ll be tough to live up to those standards. I’ll go with Lacey Evans as the winner, because I’m sure that makes sense as a payoff to her coming out, doing nothing, turning around and walking to the back in Crazy Uncle Vinny’s mind. It’d be nice to give Asuka something after her seemingly random dethroning, but Lacey seems more predictably random. Cruiserweight Championship: Tony Nese vs. Buddy Murphy (c.) 205 Dead Crowd. I watched the Cruiserweight match from the Rumble pre-show the other day, and Buddy Murphy seems like a pretty good wrestleperson. Let’s say he retains, because he’s marrying Alexa Bliss and the company still loves her even though she’ll probably never wrestle again. Andre Roussimoff Memorial Battle Royale (ARMBaR) Just look what it did for Mojo Rawley! How can they make up for having Braun Strowman win the tag titles with a ten year old last year? Have him feud with two schmucks from Saturday Night Live so WWE can end up on a legitimate sports program the next morning! So either he wins, or after he eliminates the aforementioned schmucks he eliminates himself and chases them to the back leaving it open for (randomly points at list of entrants with eyes closed) Curtis Axel to win. Side thought: I think next year they should bring back Nicholas and rehire Matt Striker, putting them against the Bar, the Usos and the New Day. Striker can tutor the kid on the road, and putting them over the entire division will really solidify Nicholas’ legacy as an undefeated two-time tag team champion. Raw Tag Team Championships: Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins vs. the Revival (c.) The Battle of the WWE Random Name Generator Recipients! ...good lord, they’re actually giving the Edgeheads a Mania match? For the titles? I know the belts don’t matter and that maybe a dozen people give a rat’s ass about both teams combined, but still - Ryder and Hawkins’ whole shtick is that they never win. That ALWAYS gets over. So obviously they have to win here to get their “Wrestlemania Moment,” in their “home state” of “New York.” Smackdown Tag Team Championships: Nakamusev vs. the Bar vs. Blackochet vs. the Usos (c.) Aren’t I so witty with my portmanteau tag team names? I’m glad Wikipedia exists to not only tell me all 107 matches, but to remind me that yes, the Usos are tag champs again. What with them losing in Brooklyn, I expect Black and Ricochet to win the titles to start off their big show (no, not that one) debut with a bang and to finally tie them to Smackdown instead of Raw. they’ll have better matches on that show anyway. Or the Usos retain because they’re related to the Rock, who cares. Shane McMahon vs. the Miz Because Super Shane needs to get his annual hyperventilating stunt show in. God bless the Miz, he may be the best company man since John Cena for doing whatever stupid shit they come up with for him. Case in point: this fucking match. Does anyone besides Shane or Vince give two shits about this? Logic says the Miz wins because he’s (somehow) the babyface, so I’ll say Shane wins and the Miz’s dad hugs him afterwards because even though his son main evented Wrestlemania and defeated John Cena (there he is again) and got married to a smokin’ hot model and had a kid, NOW he’s finally proud of him because he put up a valiant effort against the 50 year old son of the owner of the company. Women’s Tag Team Championships: the IIconics vs. Nia Jax and Tamina vs. Beth Phoenix and Natalya vs. the Boss n’ Hug Connection (c.) Who’s got the worse name, the Australians or the champions? I guess Trish and Lita said no, so they dusted Beth Phoenix off and pretend she’s important enough to justify her Hall of Fame induction. Nia and Tamina suck, Billie and Peyton don’t matter, Beth won’t be around the next day and I can’t see them changing the titles so soon after creating them. Bayley and Sasha retain. Kurt Angle vs. Baron Corbin John Cena Oh, shut up. You know it’s going to happen. Cena beats up Corbin on the way to the ring, spouts some jargon about hustling respect loyally, he drags Angle through three minutes of suck hoping he doesn’t accidentally kill him, somebody wins and they both go away. (Flips a coin) Cena wins, LOL. AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton Fighting because reasons! Um... let’s say AJ wins, because Orton is a made man and they wanna thank AJ for not leaving for All Elite Wrestling (what a terrible name). Christ, how many pointless matches could they trim to make this a show of reasonable length? Not everybody needs a Wrestlemania payday... do those even exist anymore with the Network? United States Championship: Rey Mysterio vs. Samoa Joe (c.) I’ve got nothing sarcastic to say about this match, I’m actually looking forward to it somewhat. Rey Mysterio can still go, and although people say Joe has lost a step since coming to WWE I’m actually a bigger fan of him now than ever. I think he’s benefited a lot from having to tone it down and only do two or three big spots in matches as opposed to a billion, although whether that’s due to the restrictions of the “WWE Style” or age/injuries is up for debate (I felt the same about Cesaro slowing it down going from Ring of Honor to WWE). Rey can survive a loss here and I think they wanna get as much out of Joe while they still can, so he retains. WWE Championship: Kofi Kingston vs. the New Daniel Bryan (c.) Remember when the “World” title wasn’t likely to be in the middle of the show? As much as I’d hate to see the Hempyweight Championship belt go (and no matter what it’ll eventually have to), I think the crowd would riot if Kofi didn’t win. So I reckon Kofi wins, then Big E. and Xavier turn on him right afterwards to piss the crowd off right after throwing them a bone. Y’know what? I think it would be interesting to see a riot at a wrestling show. Fans have threatened it with signs ever since Cena vs. Van Dam, but we’ve never actually seen one. It’d certainly be a “Wrestlemania Moment.” Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre Yay, Roman’s back! And he’s not in the main event again! Yet! I’m as glad as anyone that Reigns seems to have beaten leukemia, but the entire feud with Drew seems like something they threw together at the last minute because they didn’t expect him to come back so soon. I can never tell if they’re behind Drew or not, they seem to change their minds every other week. Roman wins, obviously, then probably goes right back into the Universal title picture. Triple H vs. Batista The epic final battle between Drax the Destroyer and whatever Triple H’s character was called in Blade 3. I’m interested in this match due to sheer sideshow curiosity. Big Dave hasn’t wrestled in however long, and last time Hunter wrestled he ripped a titty off his chest in the beginning of the match. I have enough faith that’ll it be something watchable at least, Triple H’s match with Angle and Rousey was good last year. Batista wins and rides off into the sunset, and Trips “retires” for about a year. Let’s give it a year and a half if we’re being generous. Universal Championship: Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar (c.) Prediction for number of German suplexes: 11. Now this one is a sticky wicket. On the one hand, it’d be nice to have the Rumble winner, y’know, win, and have someone with the belt who’ll be around every week. On the other hand, I’m sure Vince is already salivating over the thought of Roman conquering the unstoppable once every four months onslaught of Brock Lesnar. On the THIRD hand, they did make a t-shirt for Rollins that says “Beastslayer” which would be completely pointless to peddle at shows if he lost. I’ll go out on a limb and pick Lesnar, but whoever wins is getting Roman as a challenger  Intercontinental Championship: Finn Balor vs. Bobby Lashley (c.) Can we get this show over with already? I’m already bored just writing about it. The Demon wins back the title that he just lost for no reason a few weeks ago, Lio Rush probably gets beat up and the crowd continues to go mild for Bobby Lashley. Next. Women’s Championship, winner takes all: Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte Flair (c., Smackdown) vs. Ronda Rousey (c., Raw) Becky. Becky, Becky, Becky. Wait, I have to say something other than that about the match? The build for this has been all over the place. Becky taps to Asuka at the Rumble, then takes Lana’s spot to win the Rumble match itself. Becky’s suspended, but she’s on every show anyway. Then she’s not suspended, she and Ronda break the fourth wall on Twitter, Charlotte replaces Becky, then she wins the Smackdown belt from Asuka and it’s a triple threat, and my God I think I’ve gone cross eyed. Who wins will really depend on where they place this match on the card. I know they’ve said it’ll be the “main event,” and if it truly goes on last then they’d be insane not to give it to Becky. I’ve been trying to reasonably predict the order in which the matches will take place. BUT... we all know WWE has been saying double main event, triple main event, whatever for years. If it DOESN’T go on last, it’s probably gonna be Charlotte. She’s already beaten Trish’s record for number of Women’s title reigns, and lord knows WWE wants to make her seem like the best at everything due to her name. I’ll (perhaps foolishly) put all my chips on Becky, but won’t be surprised in the least if it’s Charlotte. Oh yeah, Ronda’s in the match too. How ‘bout that. *whew* So yeah, sixteen matches on what’s liable to be a seven hour show. I’m likely to watch it in spurts, because A) my TV is always at the risk of being hijacked by a six year old, and 2) I’m going to fall asleep if I try to watch it all in one shot. I won’t be drinking, because I’d rather fall asleep due to boredom rather than alcohol consumption this year. I almost don’t want the women’s match to go last, because the crowd will be fucking exhausted by then. Of the sixteen matches, I’m confident about half will be good. So there’s that. We’ll have a couple overblown entrances, some forced “Wrestlemania Moments,” the possibility for an entertaining car wreck or two, maybe an Undertaker appearance. This is the first year though where I’m sort of dreading the Grandest Stage of the Showcase of the Immortally Ultimate Thrill Ride in twenty years of fandom, and that’s pretty disheartening. That Takeover sure was something though, wasn’t it?

[smushpub]

#breakingNews Russell Westbrook (@Russwest44) won't be disciplined for shoving a fan, but fan is possibly going to file sexual harassment suit for having his right tittyball breast testicle grabbed while at a place of business. http://www.espn.com/nba/story/_/id/22301797/nba-discipline-russell-westbrook-oklahoma-city-thunder-fan-incident #OutThereBad

[dinoerotica-blog]

It's daddy day my dude, so this Dino got some daddy tittyballs with a sprinkle of hair to make the day a good day of daddy. Yeah! #love #fathersday

[iamlovekillz]

Look at the #tittyballs #llinda23 #alldatass

[christopher-walzak]

@whitecowbell @dollyberlin #whitecowbelloklahoma @johnrdellis #tittyballs #mokomokai2016 #murderhobos #dndfortune