#threads. / benjamin & allegra

[thirtecnth]

@itsallegra / closed event starter / allegra hayes setting: minnie's dancehall - the ball

Benjamin knew he should be staying away from Allegra... Sorting himself out as he told her he was going to-- but one look at her from where his spot at the bar and he was done for. Ben really should've known she wouldn't be dressed anything less than perfect. Sighing, he swallowed back his drink and left it for the bartender, nodding thanks before he caught her line of sight and made his way over.

"You're making it very hard for me to work on myself, Allegra Hayes," he said, offering her a smile. "You're beautiful."

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Once she was steadied, Benjamin pulled his hands away, sitting some with the memories of when they saw each other last. He hadn't even heard her say his name in such a long time. "I came back to find Josie," he said, letting out a deep sigh. "Didn't exactly go over as well as planned and now I'm stuck here for good." He was still getting used to that part. All that time he spent getting away and he was right back where he started. Shaking his head from the thought, he leaned his shoulder against the building, glancing her up and down. "How about you?"

returning to town a year ago had been a lot to process, even more so when she found out that she couldn't leave. the only bonus to her was that artemis was still in town and she got to reconcile with her sister, something she'd been hoping to do for years.

she had been raiding the vinyl records at the trading post and managed to nab a pile of records she'd been quick to get her hands on. beaming from her purchases, allegra was walking home with her eyes fixated on the back of the record to see what songs were listed on the album. turning the corner, she almost crashed into someone, she would have if it wasn't for the others quick reflexes.

"sorry!" she called out, her eyes focusing on who was in front of her "ben?" she asked in disbelief "i could say the same about you. what are you doing back here?"

[thirtecnth]

@itsallegra / closed event starter / allegra hayes setting: huntsville lake

When Benjamin spotted Allegra, he made his way immediately off the ice, hoping to make it seem as though he was getting off anyway. "Hey there, Hurricane Hayes," he said, smiling as he leaned against one of the nearby trees. "You're skating, right? Need a partner?" His cheeks were already red from the wind and his hands were freezing. He was determined to talk with her, however.

[thirtecnth]

@itsallegra / closed event starter / allegra hayes setting: the lake

"You’re gonna get us both in trouble."

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@itsallegra / closed starter / allegra hayes setting: huntsville clinic

Benjamin had just finished up for the day and was getting ready to go home when one of the nurses told him someone else was waiting for him. He walked out, assuming it was another patient, but he found it was Allegra—standing there and looking as beautiful as ever.

He couldn't help but smile. "Sorry, you're too late... I'm off duty. Maybe one of the other doctors around here can help you, Miss."

[thirtecnth]

@itsallegra / closed starter / allegra hayes setting: main street

Being back in town was both nostalgic and torture. He thought that since time had passed, the good would be a lot more present than the bad, but everything was just older. He had changed so much more than his hometown ever did. The only unexpected thing was the monsters that came out at night.

Rolling his eyes, Benjamin put in his earphones and continued his jog down the street. He had enough music downloaded to last him a while still, but he didn't want to think about the years ahead and everything he would miss. As he glanced down to search through the current selection, his feet carried him around the corner of a building and almost directly into someone else.

"Jesus, I'm sorry," he said and reached out, hoping to steady them, but blinked in immediate recognition. "Alle?" He let out a sigh. "Didn't ever expect to see you here again."

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"That's something we have in common then," Benjamin stated softly, setting a hand on her cheek. "You prove it to me and I'll prove it to you." He could do without ever having made his parents proud. He could do without any sort of praise from anyone. But when it came to her-- he needed it. Wanted it more than anything. "Please don't." And it felt wrong, to show that kind of vulnerability, but he needed her to know how much her leaving again would hurt him. "And I won't either." He contributed to it. The one that started it. That fact didn't escape him either. But this time, he wouldn't run. Even if he had the choice, he wouldn't leave either one of them again. Not by choice. "That's our story," he said, setting a hand over hers on his cheek. He soon brought it to his lips, kissing the back of it gently. "I love our story." He loved her. Always had and always would.

"i guess when i feel like i've proven myself enough to deserve them...to deserve you" leaving was a problem they both shared. they were young, full of fire and hadn't figured out communication. she didn't want to run anymore, she didn't want to be the hurricane she once was. "no running. not this time, i promise" the last time was when she hit rock bottom. she had spiralled completely into relapsing the last time she left. turning to anything that would help numb the pain of his absence. it took a drug hazed nightmare of losing artemis and him to shock her back into reality and the mindset of change. change was good, it brought them here. "it took us years, several relapses, reunions and breakdowns, but we finally got here." she smiled up at him, her thumb stroking his cheek. he silenced the noise, he made everything crystal clear in her world "you and me"

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Benjamin smiled and nodded. “Yes, Ma’am. Only because you said so.” He knew she was being serious, he just didn’t want her to be scared about him. He could handle this. As she pulled him in, his heart did a leap and his arm slowly wrapped around the small of her back, keeping her pressed against him. For the first time in a long time, he had so much to lose. She was everything to him. She had given him all the strength he needed to feel confident with this and she was the best thing that happened to him. When they pulled away, he pressed his lips to her forehead. “I promise. I will always come home to you, Alle.” As much as he didn’t want to, he finally pressed one more kiss to her palm and smiled. “Hold onto this, I want it back later.” And with that, he turned around and walked into the chaos.

allegra let out a sigh and against her better judgement nodded her head in agreement with his request. "fine, i'll do this because you ask but you better stay safe when you're out helping people." she warned. she wouldn't know how to cope if he got hurt. the screams raged on proving how little time they had before she had to let him go. allegra closed the distance, pulling him to her to kiss him like there was every possibility that it could be the last time given that thing in the water.

"stay safe. come home."

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"Alle, when are you going to learn that you deserve everything," Benjamin stated with a smile as he carefully tucked some of her hair behind her ear. It all started with his leaving. He left Josie when he shouldn't have and he left Allegra when he shouldn't have. She deserved so much more than someone who just ran. "Okay. Together. As a team." He had dreams of moments like this. After she left that second time, she was all he dreamed of for months. Reality was so much better than any of it. He pressed another soft kiss to her lips and then to her forehead before pulling her in close. "I will always want you. Always." She was the only thing that felt stable and consistent.

"thank you, your faith in me has always been more than i deserve" benjamin was always more than she deserved. the past was a place she didn't want to revisit with him, she wanted them to be better this time. she wouldn't survive losing him again. "let me help you too. you said it yourself, we figure this out together, we're a team" the pressure of being the older sibling was a burden they both bore, if anyone understood that feeling it she worried about it would've been him. for now, she'd settle in the warmth of his arms and be thankful for the peace they have found. allegra smiled at his mention of the invisible string, feeling comfort in his reassurance. "i'm here for as long as you want me to be"

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"I have full faith in you," Benjamin said, smiling down at her. She was everything to him. The past hurt and the thought it all happening again felt like it would kill him, but the alternative was worse. If something happened, he never wanted to say he didn't try. "Just don't carry too much of that weight on your shoulders. Let me help." They both had a lot to handle as older siblings, the least he could do was try to help her bear it. His heart was pounding but he welcomed the feeling if it meant she'd keep smiling at him. "You're never going to lose me. Invisible string, remember? You're tied to me."

allegra nodded in agreement, hopefully this time round they'd get things right. time apart had given them both a chance to grow and since seeing each other again after years apart, allegra had come to learn the new qualities about him as well as reacquainting herself with the nostalgic ones. "together. i don't want to be some unpredictable mess anymore. i can't be that, for you and for artemis. you deserve better" for years she had run riot and well and truly ran the train off the rails, she had cleaned up her act and she was determined not to mess this up. smiling up at him, their lips met "i don't think there will ever be a time i'm sick of you. you're right, we take it slow and no matter what happens with dating, i don't want to lose you from my life"

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God, what on Earth was he doing? Benjamin was at odds with himself. He had loved her since they were just kids in this very same town and here he was, getting everything he ever would've wanted and denying it outright. His heart told him every bit of this was wrong but his head knew better. Right now, he was unstable and unpredictable. He hadn't properly grieved anything and he was much too concerned with his sister to allow himself to play with Allegra's heart again. If he was going to stay with her-- he wanted to be sure she would know it was for good.

He wanted this moment to last forever. This small beautiful moment where he had just felt his body light up from a kiss and now had her forehead pressed so simply against his. To be hers was an honor he just couldn't give himself. "I'm sorry," he said, swallowing hard. "It may be valid but I know how this feels and I'm so sorry." It took every little bit of him not to pull her back. He felt so unsteady as she pressed that kiss to his cheek. The burn of her lips sunk into his skin and stayed there.

He didn't want to let go of her hand, he just stayed there, like it was a last thread. "I'm going to make you proud of me, Alle," he stated softly, lost as ever when the connection finally severed. "I'll be the man you deserve." He stood there-- frozen. This was one of the hardest things he'd ever done and he would beat himself up for centuries over it. He could only nod in confirmation that he would and watched her walk away until he couldn't see her frame any longer. Even when a good thing was right in front of him... How could he ever feel like it deserved it?

she melted into him. his lip on hers were a feeling that she would never tire of and part of her thought she would never feel them again. she had put in the work to growing up since they last were together, losing him was her wake up call. the fear of destroying anything to do with him when they had just got back onto a good track sat in the pit of her stomach threatening to swallow the butterflies that fluttered around. ben had always been so certain about them and it was her turn to do that for him.

she knew what was coming. she knew there had to be some restraint between them. allegra pressed her forehead to his, her thumb brushing his cheek "i'll always give you time" she looked to see his eyes shut and maybe that was the less cruel version. "ben, you've got a lot to process and you're still relatively new here. i've had time to deal with the fallout of my arrival and you need to have time to do that with yours. asking for time is a valid request" she smiled to reassure him despite the sinking feeling she felt "i trust you..." a kiss pressed to his cheek. she stepped back, her arm stretching out and still holding his hand "and when you're ready you know where to find me" allegra continued backwards, arm stretching out until her hand detached from his and distance was between them "take care of yourself and josie!" she called back before turning and walking away to go return her skates.

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Benjamin took up the hand that gripped his arm and brought it quickly to his lips. “Yes.” He knew she could handle herself. She was like a partner to him. But he was a doctor and people were bound to be injured. If he was out there wondering if she was okay, he’d be completely distracted. “Allegra, I’m always coming home to you. I promise.” The screams were giving him chills. He could work well under pressure but this was otherworldly. Literally. “Would you mind giving me something for the nerves?” He muttered quietly. “Please?”

allegra gripped onto his arm, eye staring directly into his "ben, are you seriously asking me to leave you right now?" she knew he meant it in the most protective way but how could she leave after they had just witnessed whatever that thing was. this was the compromise that had been so adamant to get right. one asks and the other would listen. allegra let out a sigh in frustration "if i do this, you better come home in one piece or whatever that thing is will be the least of your worries."

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Benjamin chuckled softly. "Patience is a virtue we both lack," he said, his eyes tracing each one of her features. He'd touched every little bit of her at some time or another but he felt like he was never really seeing. Definitely not admiring like he should have. "We'll grow together this time. Compromise." He had been too selfish for years now. He only wanted to think of her and his sister. Smiling, he tilted her chin up and softly pressed his lips to hers. He only lingered a moment there then pulled away and nodded. "Alle, I'm gonna keep trying until you're sick of me... We'll take it slow. Okay?"

the breath left her lips at the feeling of his hand on her cheek. her hand lifted to softly hold his wrist. trust them to both agree that they needed time apart and fail miserably at it. benjamin had more willpower in restraint whereas allegra had taken to jumping blindly in life. in a town such as this, was it worth the risk of keeping your self away from someone you wanted to be around if they felt the same? she'd seen people lose their best friends, their other halfs, their family - that laid things out in a perspective she hadn't thought about prior to witnessing those things happening.

"all we can do is give it a try" she smiled up at him "we'll start over, a clean slate. the patience thing i'll work on, that's a general life thing" life ran too slow for allegra in general, some patience would do her good "and i'll call you out on your bullshit, just like you do with me. we figure this out together, we communicate" a hurdle that they had fallen at before. despite laying it out, some part of her brain needed the confirmation "...are we really going to do this?"

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Unable to resist himself, he closed the gap and pressed his lips against hers. It was soft. Simple. Those words were all he had ever wanted to hear since she left. Now he knew completely that if there had ever been someone on his side, Benjamin knew it would be her. It would always be her. Frankly, it terrified him. He was afraid of messing up, of not being the man she needed, of being so traumatized by his past that he would never grow past it. Ben had been so ready to marry her back then. In an instant. But when it all crumbled, he did too. Every bit of confidence he had. Gone. There wasn't a lot of things he feared in this world and losing her again made up a majority of them.

"Alle," he said softly, pulling away to press his forehead back to hers. "I need time with this. Give me time." His eyes stayed shut if only because he couldn't do it if he had been in her gaze. "My parents are dead, Josie is going to give birth soon, I just got here not long ago..." He swallowed, hard. "I'm terrified and I need to get my own shit together before I can be the man you need." Pulling away, he set a hand on her cheek and kept her close to him. He just wanted to live in this for just a little bit longer. "I'm not running away from you. Every single word I have said to you, I meant it... But I can't throw myself into this yet because I know I will fuck it up and lose you for good." And yet here he was, loving her completely. He knew it too. It was just too much.

"i'm always onto or up-to something" she smirked and let out a squeak when she was suddenly pulled off to the side. she'd missed him dearly, that more apparent than ever now they had found one another again. despite her past theatrics, benjamin had always brought out the best in her. she wanted to be better. she was better. the problem they always faced was that they were like a pot of water on a stove. they would never know if they were going to get burned until they plunged their hands into the pot to feel if the water peaceful or piping. "we were both stubborn, i don't blame you. it prompted me to get my shit together" losing him the last time almost killed her. she had gone fully off the rails and hit lower than rock bottom before she sought out help and like a cat with nine lives she'd managed to scrape herself back together. allegra watched him kiss the back of her hand, hopeful that they could put everything behind them once and for all. she brought her free hand to rest on his cheek, and stepped on her tip toes to press her forehead to his "i'll dive into anything if it meant you were safe. i've done a lot of reckless things in my life but hurting you has been the worst of them"

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Benjamin chuckled. He really could get away with nothing— not that he ever really wanted to. The side she brought out in him felt more like himself than anywhere on Earth. He just reached up and set his hand on her jaw, smoothing his thumb across her cheek. “I’m aware.” She was just hard to stay away from. He had to wonder why he was doing this to himself.

He swallowed. “I want to try, but I want to do it right,” Ben said, allowing a small smile to form. “Let’s start it over again. Go on another first date. If the magic is still there and you’re willing to be patient with me and call me out on my bullshit— who knows.” He couldn’t ever stay away. That was the fact of the matter. “You’re always worth the risk too.”

"it's entirely your fault that a little praise does something to me" and it was. it was all him. there was something to be said about the rebellious girl that wanted to be good for him. the gap was closing between them and the air felt like it was leaving the room "now you're really not playing fair"

they'd spent the majority of their lives together in one way or another, and there wasn't a morsel of allegra that ever wanted a life without benjamin. he had been there for the highest highs and the lowest lows, and through it all he was the one constant safe place in her turbulent life. a soft smile on her lips while they danced to the tune, she thought over his question "i don't know. i know we've not had the easiest timeline, and as messy as we have been, i wouldn't change that. it's us." she answered honestly "but somethings are always worth the risk. no matter what it is, you're always worth the risk."

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Benjamin knew this was bad, the first aid tent had to be flooded and here he was, getting drunk. "Fuck if I know," he said, setting his hand on her arm as a giant shadow of something rose in the air. He turned her toward him. "If I tell you to go home, will you please go home and let me handle it?" Whatever it was, he didn't want her in the middle of it. "I mean, Alle. Please. I'll find them, I just -- I don't know what this is."

"we never were popular with adults." she laughed, giving his hand a squeeze. allegra gave him a smile and a kiss for good luck "you got it" she broke away and moved to the bar, giving her best distraction for as long as ben needed to swipe their treasure. once she saw that he had the goods in hand, allegra gave a quick bye and ran off to enjoy the riches with her man.

TIME SKIP

she hadn't heard the noise at first, she was too busy giving heart eyes to him. "hmm?" she mumbled but then the sound pierced her ear that time. allegra sat up from her spot, trying to figure out what was going on "what is that?" screams. bone-chilling screams that shocked her system sober "we need to go. josie and artemis... we need to find them"