#thoughts of the birdkiller

[nikdymetonedostihne]

Might as well accept that “would you be so kind” works on everyone and I do hold power

[withanarrow-a]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐋.

geyser.

your soul doesn’t content itself to sit pretty underneath the earth for long – like a shaken bottle of soda, it aches to burst from its confinement and reach for the sky!  you bubble over, you overflow, when you laugh it’s loud, open-hearted and contagious!  when you cry, it’s a summer’s heat storm.  do you know the joy it is to be around you?  i can see your eyes glint with excitement as your mouth is trying to catch up with your thoughts rushing out.  you are ribs stinging with laughter, you are forgetting time for the vibrancy of the world around you.  you fill a room as you fill a heart.  you may worry that you are too much, worry not!  i know your anger burns as hot as your joy soars high and it scares you.  you do not wish to sear who comes near you.  but anger has its place and it is by your heart, a guard dog to protect it from hurt, to demand it be treated right.  live as big and loud as you can!  by taking up space, you give others the space to do the same and they love you for it.

tagged by:  no one i stole it from myself hehe tagging:  @cnaries, @blckhawks, @mudwoven, @huntlena, @birdkill​, @nexusbeing​, and anyone else that wants to do this!

[nikdymetonedostihne]

“Everytime you take something, you have a tendency to play with your hands a lot, it’s nice” there’s still splinters of wood beneath my fingernails from scratching the bench, and I can still see where my fingernails dug into my skin, this little play isn’t nice and I hate myself every moment meanwhile, but at least I feel like a more redeemable human being

[nikdymetonedostihne]

I DESERVE SOME OBEDIENCE AS A SWEET LITTLE TREAT!!!!!

[nikdymetonedostihne]

No amount of drugs will ever make me speak my mind I’m afraid

[nikdymetonedostihne]

What if, now hear me out, Armand feels the same way he feels about Marius as Moonbeam feels about me, HEAR ME OUT

[nikdymetonedostihne]

WHY DIDINT I BECOME AN ACTOR AT 14 LIKE I COULD SO COULD BE DEAD BY NOW I SWEAR I CANNOT TAKE THIS NO MORE LWT ME SHOW MY EMOTIONS I CANNOT

[nikdymetonedostihne]

Me when the whispers weren’t joking :0

[nikdymetonedostihne]

What the actual fuck is going on with me when I’m not on my meds. You’re not “giving Augustine the freedom he deserved”, you’re manic. Clean up the blood you lick from your hands and whisper about how good it is like a starving wolf, and get your shit together I swear to God

[nikdymetonedostihne]

I’m vibing so hard to those songs that I can almost ignore the horrible state I am in (blood :3)

[nikdymetonedostihne]

That was such a long day of forcing myself to follow someone’s orders, I’m so glad to home and listen to someone’s else’s orders. I’m not on my 6th cup of coffee. I haven’t been visibly shaking the whole day. I’m not about to start snapping my fingers at everything out of habit.

[nikdymetonedostihne]

“You’re the most pessimistic person I know” & “that’s maybe because I am over the stuff that happened to me”

Do I just idk kill myself to ease you the trouble

[nikdymetonedostihne]

Will I ever be able to live the way I desire?

[nikdymetonedostihne]

Why do I have the “I need of take care of you because I’m better and if you ever see me vulnerable I need to die because I’m above that” narcissism and not the “you need to take care of me because I’m just better and deserve it” narcissism, why God why, why Alexander why

[nikdymetonedostihne]

Being called Amadeo gives me narc high, no it doesn’t make sense, yes I’m feral

[nikdymetonedostihne]

I hate all of the scars on my hands [puts more for shits and giggles]