#thoughts of malex

[lost-in-fandoms]

for @maxybabyy who asked for arguably my favorite 1D song, aka A.M., from this

we're just swimming 'round in our glasses, talking out of our asses

A different night, a different hotel room, a different city lighting up the sky outside his window.

There's a buzz under Max's skin, tiredness mixing with red bull and vodka, making him feel like he should be sleeping and at his most awake at the same time. The condensation of his glass sticks to his skin, a droplet running down his wrist, his brain bringing up images of wet visors in the rain, sleepy car rides in beat up vans.

Daniel is still giggling on the couch next to him about something Max has already forgotten saying, lamplight bouncing around the lines of his face.

"Earth to Maxy!"

Max blinks, focusing on the hand Daniel is waving in front of his face, snapping his head forward as if to bite it, making him laugh again, too loud for the late hour.

"Falling asleep? Want me to go?"

Max knows it's a joke (is it a joke? he thinks it's a joke), but he can't help his frown, putting down his drink to wrap both his hands around Daniel's knees.

"No, stay."

Daniel's expression changes, shifting into something softer and private, reaching forward again but this time to pat Max's cheek, thumb rubbing along his cheekbone.

"Oh!" Max exclamation breaks the moment, Daniel sitting back as Max reaches for his phone, "I need to show you...hold on...!"

He scrolls through his phone, clicking in and out conversation threads.

"So, I was talking to Gianni about drugs, because, you know? And he sent me the craziest thing, and I..."

Max keeps talking, moving his phone around too much for Daniel to really focus on what he's trying to show him, but that's okay, that's not the point. The point is being sat here, a little tipsy, a little happy, having Daniel looking at him the same way he always has, like he wants to be here. Like Max is what makes him stay. Like maybe, if they try hard enough, everything is always going to be this way.

[grindy-cog]

How can you ship Malex or like Maria after what she and Michael did to Alex? It's disgusting! Didn't know you were into non-con, just filter them.

Hi Anon,

Well, I’m sorry to see that something is obviously triggering you but there’s a simple solution to that - unfollow me, block me, forget this blog exists. I’m not going to filter them in any way but you certainly can on your Tumblr - you know, your safe space?

But well, since you actually came to my blog and made it my problem, I’ll bite. What non-con are you talking about? The infamous threesome? Well, guess what? I didn’t like it either! Not the way the writers decided to deliver it, anyway. But to say that Alex was actually forced to participate by either Michael or Maria… Have we even watched the same scene? Don’t get me wrong, I wish I had known it was coming, I wish I could unsee it somehow but wtf, Anon?

Why some of you are acting as if Alex was some fragile little boy with no way to protect himself? News flash, out of the three of them, he was the trained killer there! And like it or not, it’s canon that he always had power over Michael. I fear to know what it had to be like in the RNM fandom when that scene was first aired, if this is how some of you are still acting 4-5 years later.

The reason why I personally hate that writing choice, is because of how unhealthy it was for each and every single one of them, yet it hadn’t been talked about by them later on. They were all in a really bad mental state that night, Maria included! You lot like to forget about the fact that she was losing her mum and learning upsetting things about herself and her family. Michael was the worst of them three at that point and Alex, while being hurt that night, was in fact in the best mental condition, though that doesn’t say much, given how he did let his demons and insecurity do a number on him. It had been shown the morning after, when he was the only one to say that - feeling loved or not - maybe they shouldn’t have done that.

So yeah, Anon. It was unhealthy, maybe even disgusting in some ways; born out of deep self loathing, pain, loneliness and desperation of each party involved, but was sure as hell FULLY consensual. Cause if you want to see it as non-con on Alex, then you must see that he did just the same to Michael and Maria.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[dr-lizortecho]

available on shirts lmao (I’m only kidding- except the Liz one cause I need it to feel validated)

[notsowrites]

every guitar string scar on my hand

A/N: So I was thinking about this gifset parallel I made for 3x01 & 4x11, and got an idea for a little fic. It’s something of a missing scene fic, I guess. Enjoy! <3

[AO3 Link]

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Alex stood still, chin raised as Maria fixed his tie. There was a crinkle to her brow, a look of intensity that felt like it wasn’t just directed at his accessories.

“What’s that look?”

Maria bites her lip, stepping back away from him with a soft pat to his chest. “I had a vision-”

“I thought those stopped after Liz’s treatment?”

“No, not recently,” she clarifies immediately, shaking her head. “Right after you got back into town. Right when everything with Jones, and the portal all started happening.”

Alex laughs, because that was so long ago. What exactly had she seen that she hadn’t told him and that she didn’t think was important enough to? “But it wasn’t about that?”

She shakes her head. 

“I know you loved mom reading your future, giving you little clues. But I felt like if I told you about this one, if I mentioned it, then it felt like I’d jinx something.”

Well, now Alex is even more concerned about what she saw. But even more curious is why she’s choosing this moment to tell him about a vision that is months old now.

“Maria, out with it.”

“I was standing in the middle of the gazebo. And everyone was there - Liz, Max, Kyle, Isobel, Greg, Sanders…” She pauses, as if considering her words, which he finds so strange. “I saw this day, Alex.”

He smiles, realizing what she’s saying. That she’d seen that he’d get to marry Michael. That they’d stand in the middle of town, and get to exchange vows to one another, in front of all the people they love who love them. And it ignites something inside him, to know that she’d seen it happen, despite everything that had happened over the last few weeks.

He doesn’t realize he’s crying until he feels the wetness on his cheek, and reaches up to swipe it away. 

“I didn’t think I’d ever have this. Any of it.”

“You know you deserve to be happy right?

He smiles back at her. “I do now. But for a long time… I wasn’t sure it was in the cards. You know that better than anyone.”

“My offer to elope still stands, you know.”

He thinks of that future they’d planned together as kids, to get married in a time when Alex believed it was the only option that existed. It wasn’t that he would have regretted that life, because he loves Maria. No one ever made him feel safe and loved like she and Mimi did back when being at home meant verbal and physical abuse from his father, and sometimes his brothers. Before he found what it meant to love someone, and to be loved back. 

“Thank you for telling me.”

“You know Isobel planned your honeymoon, right?”

Alex sighs. He’s browsed the itinerary she forwarded to his email, and already plans to call the resort before the reception to cancel most of it. He doesn’t want his days planned like that, and he knows Michael won’t either. There are plans in his mind that are much better uses of their time. 

“Come on, Mr. Manes, lets get you to the altar.”

“Oh, I forgot to tell you,” he lifts his hand up, pointer finger up to tell her to hold on a moment and runs off to his study.The paperwork for his name change is on his desk - it’s all notarized and everything he just need to send it off with a copy of the marriage license.

He holds up the paper as he joins her back in the living room.

“Alex Guerin?” Maria asks, sounding surprised before stepping back and looking up at him, as if letting it all sink it.

“Michael has a name that he believes means nothing. And I’ve got a name that has far too much weight and expectations attached to it.” He glances down at the piece of paper, feeling a sense of warmth blossom inside at how different everything is from where they started. “I can give Michael this one thing that he never had, the family he’s been searching for his whole life.”

“You’re gonna tell him that, right?”

Alex laughs, dropping it on the kitchen table. He thinks he’s gotten better expressing himself to Michael, and though he’s sure he’ll fumble his way through it later, he does plan on telling Michael after the wedding.  “I’ll let you know.”

[darksideofthemamon]

The progression of Alex and Maliksi's relationship in the comics (feat. Me probably overanalyzing)

(In general or shippy, up to you)

Vol 1: Villain of the week.

He's the supernatural culprit in Case 2 and she catches him. That's basically it, though it's an important detail that he's the prince of a tribe the Treses are allied with.

Vol 3: Owing a favor

She uses her last wish from winning the race to get him to help her fight Talagbusao. That's it. We don't see them converse or anything, it's all very straightforward.

This goes differently in the Netflix show where he's more involved. There are no favors or wishes and he goes to her to personally deliver a message from his dad. He also outright expresses his support for her even though he technically shouldn't ("I won't tell if you won't.")

Vol. 5: A romantically interested nuisance

Maliksi's very involved in this arc, in fact it starts with him becoming a vigilante, which interferes with Alex's work. She's very understandably pissed at him and sees him as nothing but an annoyance that gets in her way.

This interaction^ in particular makes it seem like she doesn't even take him seriously. I sense so much hostility from those panels, and from both sides even!

He flirts with her throughout this arc but she turns him down, of course. He saves her life near the end, and while she's still aloof to him, she invites him back to base for information.

Vol. 6: Official allies

It seems she changed her mind about his superhero attempts because at the start of this volume, she outright calls him for help, unlike in the previous one where she told him to stay out of it. I'm guessing this is cus she saw how useful he was to have around in battle.

He's basically become part of the team at this point, enough for them to have an SOS codeword, and for him to tag along for the next case (which we see at the end) without being asked or him offering.

As for their personal relationship, and this is the part where I start over analyzing, but Alex's expressions seem much friendlier than the previous volume where she was hostile because he was a nuisance who she already had a past history reprimanding.

1) they're sitting next to eachother fdjldjjddj, 2) she listens to him instead of ignoring him (especially in that first panel where her brother gives a speech and she's looking at Maliksi tho idk why, unless like the Kambal he's looking at Seepul who's sitting across from him??), and 3) she doesn't look pissed at him, instead having an expression that I can only describe as "open"

In the end, he flirts with her again and she still turns him down, but again, doesn't look annoyed anymore (not like in vol 5) (also notice how in vol 5 he didn't get to ride with her, but now he does just like how she told him to stay out of the way but now calls him for help)

(Compare her expression here^ with the one from Vol 5)

In general, I really like how Volume 6 shakes up the status quo! This whole time it's been the trio of Trese + The Kambal tackling cases on their own and occasionally calling in a favor from an ally but in this volume, they assemble a team and then all share a meal together in the end. It's really fun and epic to see!

[bekkachaos]

you painted all my nights

Malex | G | 531

I literally don't know what this is but I just watched the pilot again and I had some feelings, okay?

Michael had entered Alex's orbit when they were teenagers. From that moment, he had been stuck there, unable to do anything other than rotate around him.

At first it was hesitant, afraid to get too close to the unknown and foreign kindness that Alex gave him. Still, he couldn't look away. He couldn't stop himself from going to him.

Some people would call it an addiction, and maybe it was, that's kind of what it felt like, but it was more. It was a force, earthly or otherworldly, it was a set of invisible strings tied from one to the other and tugging tight when the distance grew too great between them.

He'd been locked up when Alex left for war, and though he never said goodbye, Michael knew the moment he boarded that plane, it felt like his chest was being compressed into the bars, sucking the air out of his chest and constricting his heart inside it.

And that never really went away, he had just learned to live with it, tried to deny what it was when in reality, he knew exactly why his heart never felt whole.

Seeing him again all these years later, it was like Michael could feel his gravity, pulling him in like a physical force. He could feel it in his stomach, he could feel it tugging below his navel and only letting up when we was close enough to notice all the lines on his face, take in his familiar scent, marvel in the astounding beauty of him.

They were two polar points of a magnet, they couldn't be more different, but the pull between them grew stronger the closer they became.

And then they were alone in an empty room, and Alex's lips were drawing him back in. He had spent ten years ignoring the persistent pull in his chest, learning how to live with it, trying to convince himself that this is what it meant to feel normal.

Kissing Alex would be the worst mistake he could make, an irreparable decision that there was no turning back from. A crash landing back into a kind of love he had been searching for in every empty bed he could find for ten years. Back to seeing colours that made all the others in the world turn to pale grey.

But you can't fight gravity.

And Michael couldn't ignore the pull of Alex's lips, or the way his heart came roaring back to life as they met with the spark of a decade of lost touches. The strings between them impossibly short and yet the tugging on his heart didn't leave him, only instead of aching it blossomed into something that was more than a feeling, more than he could describe.

As his fingers traced the shape of Alex under them, it all came back stronger than when they were seventeen, all the passion of that summer love with the desperation and need of two halves of a soul that had been longing to reunite.

Michael didn't know how to let go of that feeling. It was other worldly, cosmically unfamiliar, yet nothing else had ever come close to feeling like home.

[infallible-dreamers]

Begging for some grace by @dankmalexmemes for @rnmbb

Art process under the cut

[ohokaylie]

Sometimes I think about where Malex would be if Guerin had used “imma disrobe you then imma probe you” as a pick up line on Alex….🤔

[divorcedyaoi]

speechless. honkai loves me a lot more than genshin 😭😭😭 I got blade at around 30 pulls after I pulled luocha. Who I also got at around 20 pity.

[maddiehanmybeloved]

First Day of My Life came up on shuffle and now I want to eat glass

[grindy-cog]

What do you mean by Alex having power Michael? In a dom/sub way? Not judging, just curious.

Dear Anon,

Thank you for your question!

I suppose you could see it in a dom/sub way, though that wasn’t exactly what I was after? Do I think that Michael, despite his rebellious ways, has a clear need of pleasing and - to some extent- obeying those he loves the most? Yes, absolutely. But it doesn’t need to be read in a dom/sub way, sexual or otherwise, though there’s nothing wrong with that take either🤷‍♀️

However, I was more after Guerin pretty much always following Alex’s lead in many ways, and the youngest Manes being more or less the only one to get through Michael when he was being too stubborn, self-destructive or emotional for his own good. Of course, as long as Alex’s own issues and insecurities weren’t hitting too close home, but that’s another matter and not what you asked for.

Now, I don’t know how you’d see it; if the reason behind that behaviour was the fact that Michael definitely fell for Alex first; or if it was related to the sad truth of Alexander being the first person giving a damn about Guerin, Max and Isobel aside. That he knew about, anyway. Or maybe, because he could relate to Alex on many levels, crappy family life included…

If you asked me, I’d say it’s a combination of the three but most of all, Michael’s own personality and how he loves. It’s hidden and unpredictable but once out? Absolutely powerful and fierce and soul and body consuming, like the fire in his blood. But also protective, unashamed and with no way to hide.

I mean, he certainly gave his bastar.d of a father some serious whiplash with how intense he was. How completely unlike him, or even Nora in this way.

And I think Alex, because of his own personality and the way he loves, could have always tamed that fire in Michael a bit; probably even unknowingly at first, made it calmer, quieter, a gentle fire to warm up next to, instead of an unpredictable disaster.

So, in a way, Alex has a power over Michael; always had, always will, and not a bad one, too. But this is why it was such an important and milestone breakthrough moment for Guerin to finally tell Alex ‘no’. It had nothing to do with them not loving each other enough, or not fighting strong enough for one another. It definitely had nothing to do with Maria at that point. It came down to Michael, through his grief and powerful emotions, finally understanding that they both needed to grow first. Unfortunately, separately.

He was right in saying that at that point in their lives, they weren’t good for one another. He wanted to be good for somebody, and Alex wasn’t ready yet, not really. He had to come out of his shell completely first, to let himself get burn a little every once and awhile. Otherwise he’d always end up leaving, and one day, in this way or another, it’d finally be too much for Michael. That would be something they’d never come back from.

Do I wish that we could’ve avoided some unnecessary drama in s2? Heck, yes. But all those strange writing choices and even stranger plot, led to a genuine healing and character’s growth with Malex.

Hope I answered your question and take care!

[dr-lizortecho]

forget everything else about season four for a second- cause honestly the most romantic thing Michael ever did was not only snuggle but kiss Alex while he had flu symptoms, shortly after tasting the horrors for the first time

[pastelwitchling]

Hi, yes, hello! Just here because I need to send you the bill for all the therapy that I'm going to need after reading your Forget Me Not fic... I didn't cry, oh no, I sobbed my heart out!!!!! How dare you?!?!? I loved it so much, though!!!

You can’t send me the bill, I barely allow myself coffee.

And anyway. Making torturous fics is my therapy so. Ironic, isn’t it? You need therapy because I made you cry, but your crying is my therapy in and of itself?

…

Maybe I really do need to see someone.

[youngsamberg]

woke up thinking about “alex guerin” “guerin?” “never been much of a manes man you know”

[arielana]

Are you planning to write more rnm fic? I love all your stories! ❤️

🥰 Thank you! This ask really made my day! ❤️

And yes! Yes, I am. My brain is completely stuck on Malex and I have a multi chapter thing (Michael captured/Alex undercover AU angst with a happy ending) I’ve slowly been adding more words to.

I’ve been looking forward to Christmas to have some time off and do some more focused writing, so the timing of this ask was really excellent. So sweet ❤️

[burntotears]

I think I’m just showing how fucking old I am with each song I add to my malex playlist. Every time I think of a new song, it’s something from early 2000s when I was in high school. 

I’m also trying to go through all the pop punk bands that I was listening to back then and add songs from them because it makes sense. I feel like I should make a separate playlist for them, but I still love the music--it will never go out of style for me no matter how old I get. That shit definitely gets infused into your bones.