#though i can't expect I'll ever actually finish lol I just love doing these weird impulses of mine whenever I feel like it

[keiksy-cake]

Himaruya Bamboo Thicket Blog Posts Link

Hi, today I came across those super old blog posts from Hima on Hetarchive, many of which are apparently still left untranslated. Since I had nothing to do today, I decided to put them all in a doc in order and side-by-side with English translations. Since it's A LOT and I'm lazy, I decided to just put them through ChatGPT lol. It's still a work in progress, atm of writing this I've only done January-March 2008 lol, but anyway if you're interested, feel free to check it out:

I'm learning a lot about Hima like this honestly, like apparently he has ADHD? It's very interesting

And if you happen to know if there was anybody else who tled these elsewhere, please let me know! :)

[asterjaxx]

i've been watching a lot of movies recently so i'm gonna make a big post about what i think about each one i've watched so far so i can refer back to it if i ever need it

also warnings for possible spoilers for each movie below

things no one cares about under the cut

NOTTING HILL 1999 — dir. Roger Michell

I LOVED NOTTING HILL could watch this movie over and over forever holy shit i love hugh grant. also julia roberts has a very big mouth like if i see her in a different movie and she looks like completely different but i'll recognise her mouth like is that weird- SO CUTE sometimes things didn't quite sequence together ? like there were times when it wasn't quite clear how long had passed between the two scenes, but that doesn't really bother me. not a lot of exposition but again doesn't bother me. just a nice fluffy romantic film :) also has so many funny moments that are actually funny not cringe all around i love this movie so much one of my favourites ever i think

DIRTY DANCING 1987 — dir. Emile Ardolino

in short; not for me lol i can't stand patrick swayze's accent i'm sorry. didn't even watch the whole movie because i was so not interested. it's cute when he's teaching her to do the dance and stuff and i liked when they were in the water trying to do the lift but like that was the only memorable thing for me. hair reminded me of the heathers (which is one of my absolute favourite movies) but other than that it wasn't really anything crazy to me ? just an 80s movie that my mom likes

BRIDGET JONES' DIARY 2001 — dir. Sharon Maguire

good movie. mark kinda pisses me off but he's a good guy in the end so i can live with it HUGH GRANT !!!!1 though his character was a fucking ass i love when he gets beaten up not toooooo fluffy romantic, but still romantic. FUNNY, bridget jones can't get a fucking break and it's hilarious "bridget jones, wanton sex goddess, with a very bad man between her thighs. mum... hi." solid movie i really want to watch the other two (i'll add to this list later when i watch them) and there's a fourth one coming

MAURICE 1987 — dir. James Ivory

ugh gay people ^JOKE JOKE JOKE JOKE i liked this movie. i loooove things set in earlier times but like i wouldn't call this a period piece ? like it's not that far in the past, only 1910s, but then again that was still a hundred years ago. ANYWAY hugh grant again (are you seeing a theme?) ew he was DISGUSTING with the slicked back hair and the moustache EW jokes ugh he was so cute i liked the first half of the movie, the second half was kinda eh to me?? i thought maurice and clive would like have a better resolution between them so i was kinda underwhelmed didn't really like maurice's actor's accent LMAO i am awful ending was kiiiinda disappointing to me i thought there'd be more but it was sweet. I DID NOT EXPECT TO SEE DICK AND BALLS !!!!! i literally almost screamed (no i didn't i handled it like a mature person) anyway yeah this movie's good, but ew gay people I'M JOKING

04/07 UPDATE ————————————————————————

LOVE ACTUALLY 2003 — dir. Richard Curtis

"when the planes hit the twin towers..." HUGH GRANT anyway i loved this movie, super cute. it seemed like there was a lot going on but it was done in a way that it wasn't confusing. funny but not cringe. it's a win for me if hugh grant's in it hate the american president guy, hate harry's voice he sounds like a pedophile ROWAN ATKINSON JUMPSCARE ... TWICE billy mack can suck balls i hated that guy but overall super cute lovey movie but not boringly lovey. story between all of the characters was great and i liked that they all had a nice resolve between them :)

05/07 UPDATE ————————————————————————

BRIDGET JONES: THE EDGE OF REASON 2004 — dir. Beeban Kidron

when i finished bridget jones' diary, and found out there were two more movies (and another in the works) i was a little apprehensive. i thought "what more could possible happen?" but this is bridget jones this movie was super cute actually ! GOD daniel cleaver is an asshole i hate him but hugh grant....... i like that mark and daniel fight again that was fun my god she fucking goes to jail LIKE A WERGIN overall; jesus christ what a movie. i enjoyed it though. I DID NOT EXPECT THAT REBECCA WAS A LESBIAN but then again i have a cousin named rebecca that's queer like the first movie, not super fluffy romantic, but still romantic. actually funny. actually want to kill myseslf out of second-hand embarrassment at times but that's the bridget jones charm

06/07 UPDATE————————————————————————

FOUR WEDDINGS AND A FUNERAL 1994 — dir. Mike Newell

THIS MOVIE WAS SO SWEET AWWWW I FEEL SO SILLY AFTER WATCHING THAT :D rowan atkinson jumpscare once again (i knew he was in this movie) aawww man i don't have much to say about it other than it's so sweet and romantic and i just love it it's beautiful :( my brain is mush after watching it

08/07 UPDATE————————————————————————

BRIDGET JONES' BABY 2016 — dir. Sharon Maguire

holy shit ED SHEERAN JUMPSCARE!!!! oh my god i want to beat the shit out of jack. did not expect that daniel fucking died LMAOOOOO but also (massive spoiler) he's not actually dead i hope he comes back in the fourth movie giggles and kicks feet i heard that in the fourth one mark dies so bridget is alone so like maybe daniel can redeem himself when i saw mark and bridget getting married i was like oh thank god they can actually get married and daniel can't fuck her but never mind anyway i loved this movie it was funny and very bridget jones

um i forgot to write the date oopsie———————————————

SENSE AND SENSIBILITY 1995 — dir. Ang Lee

this movie made my heart hurt i was surprised at how many actors i'd seen previously in other films. like i knew hugh grant was in it (that's why i wanted to watch it lol), but i didn't expect the guy from love actually and bridget jones' mother. oh my god it all hurts the more i watch it hurts i want to cry for elinor and marianne and oh my goddd. also that fucking old bitch is so annoying i forgot her name is she mrs jennings i think but like holy shit shut the fuck up!!!!! ugh i love period media GOOD MOVIE 👍 I LOVED IT but holy shit i am too gen z for how long it was i was rolling to try and find something to keep my attention but also i wanted to watch it so bad the ending was good i liked the resolve like it was actually good i didn't expect anyone to get a happy ending LMAOOO THE MOVIE IS 2 HOURS AND 16 MINUTES. the TENSION between elinor and miss steele oh my god, WHEN THE THREE OF THEM WERE IN THE SAME ROOM i wanted to scream holy shit HLEP ME MISS STEELE'S FACE AS MARIANNE RATTLES TO EDWARD AND THEN HELP ME WHEN SHE TELLS HIS SISTER(i wrote this section while watching the movie) ugh hugh grant my looooove oh my god that man is older than my FATHER also they use the word "creature" a lot to refer to people but that's probably just the 1800s i guess "my heart is... and always will be... yours." AEUUUGHUGUHHUG

01/08 UPDATE————————————————————————

ABOUT A BOY 2002 — dir. Paul Weitz and Chris Weitz

at first i thought this movie was gonna be boring and all that, but i ended up really enjoying it! it actually was really sweet, despite not seeming like it'd be. also the guy that plays the boy marcus is the voice of jon in the new garfield movie ??????????? I'M NOT JOKING LOOK IT UP but yeah i actually really liked this movie i watched it with my mom and i enjoyed it not really much to say except it turns into a really touching movie and it's actually really nice it makes me want to not hate kids but i still do anyway

14/08 UPDATE————————————————————————

DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE MORGANS? 2009 — dir. Marc Lawrence

you know,,, i'd want to kill meryl too. ugh i love hugh grant oh my god ughhhh i like the bear :) and the horses :) i don't have much to say about this movie LMAO i feel like most of it wasn't super memorable but i did enjoy it, so less rom more com but i mean that was the point. still sweet ending they finally get a kid. also is that a thing? that a kid can be alive and in the world but not yet have a name? like bro's gotta have a birth certificate with something on it right? i don't know i've never had kids (thank god) and also maybe it was chill like that or maybe it's just a movie and it's just nice and details like that don't matter ^_^

19/08 UPDATE————————————————————————

MUSIC AND LYRICS 2007 — dir. Marc Lawrence

OH MY GOD i wasn't expecting to like this movie that much but holy shit actually that ending was so sweet i cried i said i wasn't gonna lose my head but then pop goes my heart (pop goes my heart) i wasn't gonna fall in love again but then pop goes my heart ALL I WANNA DO IS FIND A WAY BACK INTO LOOOOVE ugh I WAS SO HEARTBROKEN WHEN HE TOLD HER SHE WAS LIKE THE CHARACTER IN THAT BOOK THAT GUY WROTE ABOUT HER LIKE NAOOOOOO but holy shit yeah i liked this movie actually it was actually funny not cringe and also hugh grant so 👍

[dreamedge]

AO3 tag game :3

shout-out to @ragecndybars for the tag! <3 I got to think a lot about some older fics and also the deep, eternal impact CC has has on my soul, so I'm emotional rn lol.

How many works do you have on AO3?

21! Which is, a lot more than I thought tbh. I've been writing these long, long fics for so many years now that I've sort of forgotten about all the little ones I've managed in between. And even the long ones add up after a while. Though, I did only import a small selection of my fics from ff.net, so the back catalogue of stuff I've actually written is way longer. ... That's fine, some of that stuff can stay buried lol.

Even at 21 though... *Looks at my shoebox of story ideas and outlines* Its... its still not enough. Its, its just no where close to even making a dent in everything I want to write eventually.

What’s your total AO3 word count?

650,444. I'm pretty sure at least half of that is entirely in CC, and another quarter is in can i bleed. Which, tbh I'm not sure how I feel about that lol. Deeply introspective fics, my passion, my talent, my beloathed. Some part of me does miss simply writting 5k chapters and calling it done for a week. Not all of me though.

How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

Only 10! That number probably isn't going to grow much either. I tend to gravitate towards bigger projects these days rather than simple oneshots or even like, 5 chapter long stuff, so I tend to go all in on a small number of fandoms instead of spreading my attention around, even though I want to.

Cardcaptor Sakura

Digimon

Dragon Age Inquisition

Percy Jackson

Persona 3

Power Rangers RPM

RWBY

Teen Wolf

Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle

BNHA

Top five fics by kudos:

A Most Precious Thing (Tsubasa): tbh this being number one is an absolute surprise, though I'm very happy about it. According to AO3, this was published almost 10 years ago, will be 10 years exactly in just a few weeks, but people still regularly give it kudos and comments. It was a complete experiment, style wise; I'd never written anything like it before, I've written one thing like it since, and I'm just so thankful that people loved it so much despite the inexperience behind it.

Of the Woods (Teen Wolf/CCS): This being so high up is not a surprise, and I'm annoyed about it. Mostly bc I know its only so high up bc its for such a big fandom, written during said fandom's height. I think its probably one of the fic I've soured the most on since I wrote it; its just not that great.

Crests Corrupted (Digimon) : Oh, here it is. My masterpiece. Maybe its weird to say that of the fic that's only 3rd, but it truly is, and to see a fic I have put so much of myself into being even this high and this appreciated means so much to me.

can i bleed within your love (Persona 3) : Hi! I don't have much to say about this one, only that I'm so happy with the sheer outpouring of love this has gotten, and I can't wait to finish it.

True Feelings Chocolate (Digimon) : Oh, um, I sort of forgot about you. What are you doing here? ...This is awkward, I really didn't expect this to do so well. Its just a silly little fic I wrote for valentine's one year. I'm glad it did well?

Do you respond to comments?

I try! I don't succeed a lot of the time; generally I'm very tired after posting a chapter and then its been like two weeks and responding feels awkward. Also I tend to ramble, if you haven't noticed yet, some sometimes I'll just close out of responding to avoid any chance of me accidentally spoiling or saying something I shouldn't. I'm... working on it.

What’s the fic with the angstiest ending you’ve ever written?

Oh that's easy. Its the RWBY one, Your Love on Your Sleeve and Your Pain Buried Deep. I don't tend to write angsty fics, I like happy endings, I think this is the only one I've ever written and I'm glad to keep it that way.

Do you write crossovers?

I've written one before, the TW one that's up there. I generally tend to prefer fusions over straight up crossovers; I've gotten several P3 fusions planned, a PJ fusion, the bnha fic I wrote is a fusion. I just, I love fusions. I greatly prefer writing them over cross-overs generally.

Have you ever gotten hate on a fic?

Once or twice, but that was ages ago and I've mostly blocked it from my memory. The fandoms I'm in now have been full of such lovely people, I've been really lucky.

Do you write smut?

Smut, as in the fic happens to have a sex scene? Not typically, but I'm not against doing so when the need calls. Smut, as in the entire point of the fic in the sex scene? No. I'm actually very bad at it. I'll do it if I must but I find even writing kiss scenes awkward, let alone everything else. I will gladly leave it to people much better at their craft them I am.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

To the best of my knowledge? No I don't think so.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I've had people offer? I don't know if they ever did or even if, in my general ineptitude when it comes to responding to people, I actually agreed they could.

Hey, if anyone wants to translate my works, feel free!

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

... Hey, thats not fair.

Hmmm, well, after much thinking I'm gonna go with Kurogane/Fai from TRC. Other ships may currently have their hooks in my brain, but kurofai is a big comfort to me still, I really love them. And lets be honest. Ain't no one doing it like those two.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish, but don’t think you ever will?

I have, its not posted anywhere, and technically I've barely started writing it, its almost entirely outline rn, but I do have a p3 fantasy au thats just... fucking massive. Its a huge project just from the outline i have, long even in comparison to CC, so long that I doubt I'd ever finish it to the point where I've barely started it.

What are your writing strengths?

Combat. I write a damn good fight scene and I know it. I take a lot of pride in that. I also tend to have a pretty solid grasp of pacing on an overall level for longer fics. Per chapter pacing gets a bit more eh, but the overall pacing of arcs and stuff for my longer fics, I generally know what I'm doing.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I never know when to shut the fuck up! This is a problem I've known I've had for years. I just let characters go on these long, internal monologues, which is only acceptable because I also write deeply introspective fics. However, it tends to slow chapters down a lot and after a bit, characters repeat themselves and its a problem.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fics?

I'm incapable bc I'm monolingual but I've always loved fics that use other languages! Maybe I can do that some day lol.

What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

Yknow, if I dug far far far back in my ff.net account it would probably be Naruto? I think. My memory is fuzzy and I'm not actually going to go look. However, thats the first one I posted.

The *very* first fic i ever wrote, I have a very clear memory of for some reason. It was a FFX2/Series of Unfortunate Events crossover, I was in the fourth grade, I thought it was the coolest thing. Hm, memories.

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written so far?

I actually have two answers for this, which, I know is against the spirit and rule of the question BUT. Too bad.

One is A Most Precious Thing, bc it was such an experience to write. Despite being 10 years old I still love it. It was, as I said above, an utter experiment. It is written entirely in 2nd person, which is not actually a choice? I made? Um, I tried, very hard in the beginning, to write in in my standard 3rd, and it didn't work. The story actively refused to be written as such and I kept ending up back in 2nd. And at some point I just gave up and wrote the rest of it as such. And it taught me, so much, about point of view and how that relates to emotional distance, and really, but trusting myself with my writing, that even if I can't say why this is happening, somewhere deep down there is a reason to it and I should trust that. As a writer who takes my craft very seriously, this one has a soft spot in my heart bc of all of that.

However, Crests Corrupted owns a piece of my soul that I will never get back. It is my thesis, my masterpiece, It has defined years of my life, I have poured hundreds of thousands of words into it, I have given it so much of my heart and my pain. It has redefined how I approach writing, it has shaped, totally, the style in which I write today. Even years from now, even years after I finally finish it whenever that is, I don't think I will ever be truly free of it. It is my favorite. How can't it be?

[carcharsaur]

ok I finished jack jeanne for real (all cgs unlocked) time to blog about it. I think it's just straight up the best otome on the market you can play right now. albeitttt I don't play many indies but this game was just a powerhouse of heartfelt warmth and character growth god DAMN!!!! also the art is just so beautiful yay sui ishida

I don't wanna spoil much about the game even though I also want to gush about it but I'll put this under a cut cause I dunno how long I'll ramble

I can't even really think of any huge complaints. there's a couple small things still, nothing's perfect, but compared to literally any other otome I've played the lack of things I need to overlook is also a breath of fresh air!!! the one thing that's like, this genuinely might made it hard to recommend is that my final play time was 140 hours... and that was with a lot of fast-forwarding through repeated content and not much idling (unlike I usually do LOL) but MY GOD IT'S SO FUCKING WORTH IT.... PLEASE.... you can even play it as a strictly platonic game (which would cut down the hours by like at least half) and even then I think that would be worth buying it...

ALSO: VOICED HEROINE!! my fucking favorite. also she's amazing. my new fav otoge MC... I need her to be happy and successful forever or I will drown myself in tears ok

every LI genuinely tugged at my heart strings, I cried happy tears at the ending every time... it's like eating freshly baked cookies... just overwhelming warmth...

it also did the impossible by making me MISS high school, because I was in band and choir etc and it made me so damn nostalgic for the power of putting on a performance even if I was almost never center stage TvT this game is so earnest in it's efforts and care, I literally could feel the love in it... ahg

my favorite character though was Kai... I was expecting it but he still hit me harder than expected IN MULTIPLE WAYS REAL AS HELLLLLLLLLL BTWWWW v

also I wasn't expecting this game to handle social and gender norms in a like... way I'd actually identify with? because japan has a different history with all that especiallyy within the world of theater and a lot of modern japanese media has weird ways of. um. un-lgbt'ing their cast I'll say lmao. but this game pulled some shit off I wasn't expecting. I really really really enjoyed it (and I already enjoy the awkward or clumsy "heroine hides her gender" stories so maybe I'm biased here LOL) I know this game probably took soo much fucking money to make and who knows how many years but. god I want a sequel so bad THE SIDE CHARACTERS WERE SO GOOD. it's heart warming and filling but also so so charming I can't help but hope they make more. there's light novels and stuff but I doubt those will ever be officially translated T___T ah well

also the OST, especially the performance tracks sung by the cast ARE SO INSANELY GOOD !!!! 10/10 BABEY

anyway. kai clip to say goodbye

[rharyx]

Follow up to this post, where I started cataloging my Final Fantasy journey.

Crisis Core I watched a playthrough back in high school cuz I thought Zack was cool as shit and I loved the theme music, but I never actually played it. But since I finally played 7, I knew I had to follow it up with this, and I went with the Reunion remake since I heard the combat is a lot better. Which I guess it is? I can't compare it to the original since I never played it, but the combat here was real fun and snappy -- I spent hours just doing side missions. And of course the story was as good as I remember it. Only downside is Zack's new actor is nowhere near as good as his original, and that really brings it down a tad. But it still doesn't kick Zack out of my "Top 5 FF characters" list. Also, I always liked Genesis, which I guess a lot of people don't? But I think he's just so funny. Like he actually stops his mission to kill Hojo or whatever to info-dump Loveless lore on everyone in the room. Dude's so weird, I hope he's in the remake trilogy. I think a 8/10 is fair.

Final Fantasy IV Took me a bit to finish this one since stuff got in the way. Not really much to say about this one, though, I guess. The story was good, and some areas and events were cool (like the giant robot thing), with lots of characters who show up and do their thing then leave. Cecil is pretty cool, Kain sure is a guy, and I like Rydia a decent amount. Love how that dude Edge is just straight up called Edge though lmao -- I imagined him having a sort of Johnny Bravo/Might Guy voice, which really elevated his character in my head. But otherwise, the whole game was a pretty standard affair. I kinda thought the vehicle stuff was pretty interesting -- like how you had to use the hoverboat, to get to the ship, to get to the better ship, etc. That was neat in its own way. Fuck the final boss, though, that shit felt unfair. 6/10, I guess? Definitely the mainline FF I've been least into so far, but it's still nowhere a "bad" game.

Final Fantasy XII I heard this was one divisive, but I don't see how? Like, this was really good. I did hear the original release was pretty bad compared to the Zodiac version I was playing, which made me think...... Between 12's initial release, 14's initial release, and 15's initial release...is 16 the first mainline game in over a decade that came out completely fine without needing an overhauled re-release or oodles of DLC to smooth things over in some way?? (I haven't played 13 yet, so that may have been fine upon release.) Anyway, to speak of the game itself, the License Board and Gambit System was really interesting and I kinda hope they bring it back in some way in the future, cuz I love tedious grindy stuff like that where you slowly fill up an ability grid (reminded me of the Sphere Grid, kinda). And the story -- while sometimes feeling really overwhelming with the amount of terms and names I had to memorize -- was well structured and I like how everyone's stories wrapped up by the end. Vaan is truly not a protagonist though, is he? lol. If anything, Ashe was the main character of this story, which I did kinda fuck with, even if she's not one of my favorite characters from the game. Also, I loved how many areas and differing locales we went to on the journey. I wasn't expecting such an array of distinct and visually engaging locations. One thing, though...why did half the voice over audio sound like it was being recorded through a soup can? It was so weirdly mixed. Like, you get used to it, but what happened?? Anyway, as a FF14 fan I though it was neat to see where all the Ivalice inspiration came from, and overall the game was really enjoyable to play. I've definitely not scratched the surface when it comes to the optional content, like Espers or whatever, but idk if I'll ever have the time to complete all that anyway. But for the main game itself, definitely a solid 8/10. Maybe even an 8.5.

Not sure what to do next, maybe try V once it goes on sale. Or probably just jump into Remake and Rebirth.

[toujoursmiraculous]

Thoughts and Reactions to Truth!

Just going to go straight into it because this episode is huge! I really like how at the end of a season and the beginning of another, we see the same scene that leads us out of one and into another. Gabriel fixes the Miraculous and ohhh poor Dusuu thought it was all a dream, being in evil hands. So in a way, the Miraculous being damaged may have been a blessing for her. Dx Too bad it couldn't have been fixed after Marinette got it back :/ But at least Nooroo isn't alone right? Legit only positive I can get from this. ;-; Tikki and her little hats omg it's so cuuuute! I wonder if she makes her little clothes, too awww But the other Kwami's are almost like siblings to Tikki if you think about it. Now Tikki has to share things with them all as they cause chaos all around when she's so used to her quiet life alone with Marinette. Even for a Kwami, that must be hard to adjust to.

Okay so it's almost Prince Ali's birthday that Paris is going to celebrate. Interesting! I'd really like to see him back and a storyline with that. :O Marinette holding something, clearly, that the girls can't see over video chat. Talking to what appears to be herself, reacting to what someone's saying from different sides of her room. Camera flashes going off. And then her phone getting yeeted at her all on a video call with her friends when she's supposed to be alone...considering they're all going to have Kwami's and learn some things later as they become heroes, I wouldn't be surprised in the slightest if they think back to this scene someday! OH WAIT spoiler for the upcoming episode Gang of Secrets!!! Fair warning. What if this episode with the plushies she said she's going to make, is one of if not the reason they go over and are looking around her room? Because she's been acting sus and they want to know what's going on. Especially after what happens later in the episode with Luka. Okay, back to the episode itself. Her friends observation: You're acting way weirder than normal.... IS ADRIEN AT YOUR PLACE?! I mean, fair point. xD But the thing is, whenever Marinette tends to act weirder or say/do things that Alya and the girls don't understand, it's almost always connected to her being Ladybug/Guardian. Even Lila. If she wasn't Ladybug and dealt with her so much as her, she wouldn't know a lot of things that made her not trust Lila to begin with. So Marinette has to overcompensate to try to hide everything or can't explain her thoughts or feelings about certain situations, so Alya always just assumes her behavior has something to do with Adrien. It really sucks but at the same time, what else is she going to think?

These Kwami are a lot of trouble. xD Now she's even more frazzled, so she calls Luka Adrien. More than once. I've done this where I call my siblings the wrong name more of than I'd like so I can't fault her for it. Her mind's probably a mess, poor girl. Dx "I'm sorry it's just that I cheated on you!" BIG OOF. But this gives me Kim Possible vibes when Ron assumed Kim didn't want him anymore and told her he was cheating on her when he meant to say he was cheating to be on the football team so he could be more worthy of her when he thought she wanted to "trade up" her boyfriend. Our poor Marinette! So frazzled she can't remember when her dates are, when they've been rescheduled. She can't remember her patrols with Chat Noir which are really important. She's getting to the point where it's going to be a wonder she can even function. Dx "But Marinette and I are such a big fan of his" wow this sure hits different. The way they kept quizzing each other to finish the sentence with Jagged Stone trivia was pretty cute. Luka having her finish the line with "Kiss me" that she screamed to the entire theater made me choke on my cake. "Well, if that's what you want." Smooth. "I think, yes. I want to." But you know, it gets interrupted by an akuma attack of course because that's just the way things work! :D And wouldn't you know it, it's Mr. Pigeon. AGAIN. Totally worth interrupting the moment lol Ladybug can't pick and choose, however, so here comes the sequence where she's constantly running off and he starts doubting her. Notice the parallel when Marinette started to like Luka after Adrien could never show up to things? Now Marinette's having trouble showing up and Luka's having issues with it. The second Chat Noir started to sneak up on Ladybug, we all knew he was going to get flipped. But it's so adorable and funny at the same time I love it x333 And that whole scene there of Ladynoir. Obviously it's a Lukanette-centered episode but the Ladynoir in this episode! So good! And you know, it's interesting. First time we see Adrien this episode is for FIVE whole seconds! And the way it abruptly cut off as he opened the car door... yeah you know what, Lies is going to be Adrien's POV or something of this same day. It has to be. He has 2 total scenes one of them is 5 seconds and the other one is 2 seconds. Crazy. We got about 7 seconds of Adrien's face today woo! But ugh here's where we get hurt Luka ;-; "A girl, who as always, isn't here." Ouch. The fact that if Marinette said she loved Adrien still, he'd understand and he'd get it is so sweet, and so sad that it's not even because of that, it's because she's Ladybug and the Guardian and she can't say a thing about it to him at all, that he can't accept. It's the one thing he couldn't deal with that's the issue and that really sucks. AND THIS MOMENT RIGHT HERE HAD ME GASPING AND HURTING FOR LUKA. IT'S THE MOMENT HIS HEART BROKE

But also really guys, did you notice his eyes are different now? Almost like a blue diamond look or something.

Luka trying to fight it, trying to tell Hawk Moth that the truth needs to be willingly told, not forced. But stupid Hawk Moth's able to get him to hold on anyway and gets akumatized. But not before he told Marinette to run. Which was such an awwww moment. x33 I mean, this is definitely getting a bit close to Chat Blanc territory if you ask me. New transformation music is pretty good! I like it. Also can we just appreciate that instead of trying to track down Marinette to get the truth from her, he's instead asking all her friends and family, pretty much any source besides her? AND ROSE'S RESPONSE "Marinette has no secrets because she's the most honest girl in the world!" She thinks so highly of her and it's just so beautiful. Nobody would blame her for these secrets if they only knew either. But awwwwww I love this scene!! And here's the big reveal! (no not that one) Jagged Stone is Luka and Juleka's father. 😮

Thomas today tweeted that Luka and Juleka are twins. Which would have to be fairly obvious after this reveal. There's no way that Jagged, who says he'd be a lame dad and left because he wasn't cut out for it, would have Luka with Anarka, then stay long enough to also have Juleka. I also totally forgot that in the French version, Jagged has an American accent when he speaks. XDD Just the fact that even WITH his truth powers, he asked his mother TWICE who his father was. Both times she said Jagged Stone. He still didn't believe it until he went to Jagged himself omg. This poor poor boy. Luka: 😱*gasp* Marinette: 😲 *gasp* Adrien: 😮 WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY OMG. LIKE I'M WATCHING A TELENOVELA OR SOMETHING. THEY EVEN ZOOMED IN ON THEIR REACTIONS I CAN'T And then Luka just yeets his dad because he wasn't ever there for him. I honestly did not expect Luka having dad issues to ever be a thing in this show, even though I knew he wasn't around. So like... when everything's worked out with Marinette and Adrien in the end, will Luka and Adrien end up becoming friends and bonding over things, like the whole daddy issues thing...? Are we really supposed to believe she has no feelings for Chat Noir? I mean really, look at this.

"I can't imagine what your daily life must look like" ... is she really actually being the one to bring up something about his secret identity? With that face? 😲

Their flirty banter that at this point I don't even think they realize it is, and those soft looks I just... My top ship is Ladynoir and I was not expecting any significant moments of theirs but I got it anyway. Just watching their scenes, I kept going "See, this is why they're meant for each other." My heart is happy despite all the Luka pain! It's helping me cope with it, okay? "When you're ready, I'll be here for you, Marinette." Awww so they're telling us Lukanette is on hold here. Not a guarantee, but at least on hold. He's an option for her later. So now the Adrienette vs. Lukanette for S4 we heard about awhile back makes sense now. Later on this season, probably when things calm down and she gets the hang of things, she'll be in a better position to be with someone. And by then, Adrien will probably realize and understand his feelings for Marinette. So then she'll be in a position to choose between them. Now we know where Luka gets his ability to turn emotions into great songs. That's adorable! Father-son bonding! Gabriel needs to take notes when a man who was never in his son's life as more than his idol has the ability to try to be there, but Gabriel can't. Ugh our poor Marinette, probably thinking she's going to be alone for a very long time just because of a supervillain. That's so wrong she has to feel like this. If you notice, Hawk Moth's akumatizations help people patch up relationships so much of the time as a weird unexpected result of an akuma attack. And yet, he does nothing but hurt Marinette and at times Adrien, the most when he akumatizes people. He makes me so angry! But I'm too tired for a rant about that. At least the Kwami hugs at the end helped a teeny bit anyway! c:

[fumiko-matsubara]

June 22, 2014 ー 13:41

Characters: Chiba Ryuunosuke, Yamazaki Jenny, Nakamura Rio, and Maehara Hiroto

Word Count: 2.3k words

Author's Note: I've just been wanting to write anything about these particular four lol

"What are you two doing here?"

Nakamura and Maehara purposely avoided Miki's intense stare as she interrogated them.

"I was just getting something to eat but then I saw you two across the street..." Nakamura answered innocently before finally letting herself meet Miki's gaze. "So I just thought of saying hi... didn't expect to bump with this guy though," she pointed a thumb towards Maehara.

Verbally unresponsive, Miki blankly stared back for a few seconds, seemingly taking in Nakamura's answer, before moving her gaze towards Maehara's instead and raised an eyebrow, prompting him to speak up.

Maehara immediately looked sideways, avoiding her gaze once again. "Well, you told me last week that I should cancel my date with Remi-chan and that's what I did so now I have nothing to do-"

"Bullshit," Miki cut him off, clearly not amused. "That was last month, you bastard."

Nakamura lightly scoffed at that.

"I uhh..." Maehara trailed off, his gaze darting everywhere until they landed into Miki's hair. "Your hair!" He cracked a tight grin, obviously trying to change the topic. "It looks cute today!"

"I know," Miki answered dryly. Her hair is currently tied into loose twin dutch braids. "I see myself in the mirror everyday."

"Nevermind that, there's something I wanted to ask you," Nakamura butted in, "who's that guy? He looks familiar." She gestured towards the person standing next to Miki, who had worn his bucket hat down to his face, making it almost impossible to make out his appearance.

The said person let out a deep, seemingly annoyed, sigh at the question. "You can't even recognize me and yet you decided to follow us for almost thirty minutes straight?" He breathed out.

Nakamura immediately recognized that voice. "Chiba-kun?!" She exclaimed.

"Wait, Chiba?" Maehara took a step closer towards the guy to get a closer look at him.

Chiba clicked his tongue in irritation, pulling down his bucket even further while turning his head away. "Yeah, it's me."

Maehara stood almost awkwardly by the aisle as he watched the other three go over some make up products and try them out.

...or rather it was Miki trying out the products onto Chiba while Nakamura was going through the shelves.

After their mini confrontation by the street, Miki soon had told them that she was out with Chiba to shop for make up products to use for his future stages.

"The red palette was getting kinda boring lately so I thought of experimenting with colours on him and see what fits him the best," she explained to them earlier.

Maehara admitted that, aside from what he saw or heard from his older sisters, he doesn't know that much about make up since he was more of a skincare kind of guy.

Almost 30 minutes have passed ever since Miki and Chiba settled themselves at the testing corner of the aisle, and Maehara felt like he should entertain himself with the skincare section of the store instead of awkwardly waiting for them to finish.

As he was about to excuse himself, he saw Nakamura suddenly approaching him.

"Hey, so I just saw this tint right here," Nakamura held up a product in warm pink colour in a shape of some plastic tube Maehara can't make out of, "and I thought it would look good with your skin tone."

Maehara blinked in confusion. "But I don't really wear make up though-"

"Relax~ The colour's not that pigmented and it won't even feel like you have something on your lips at all!" Nakamura breezily reassured while opening the tube's lid.

Maehara quickly stiffened when Nakamura suddenly grabbed his chin. "Now stay still," she ordered.

"Hey this is kinda..."

"Don't get any weird thoughts here, Maehara-kun~" Nakamura quickly cut him off without missing a beat.

Meanwhile, Miki slowly leaned backwards to examine her work so far. "Oooh the warm purple is kinda sexy with the faint gold!"

"Oh! That does look nice on him, miss!" A nearby clerk praised when she took a closer look.

"Right?!" Miki grinned before turning back to Chiba. "You holding up there?"

"This is nothing," he shrugged. "Though I have to be honest, I'm slowly starting to get embarrassed with all these people around..." 

Miki smiled reassuringly at him in response, gently brushing away loose strands of hair from his face. "Well, at least people here hardly recognize you. So perhaps that helps a little, right?"

"Yeah, it does..." Chiba softly replied, his gaze following Miki's fingers as she went through the lip products she has scavenged so far. "What happened last week at class was borderline torture."

Miki stiffened at his remark, clearly remembering the exhaustingly chaotic events that had occurred in less than an hour that day. "Aha..."

Chiba just rolled his eyes at her lack of response. "Say, can you hand me a smaller mirror? I want to take a closer look on what you've worked on so far while you keep looking for uhh... whatever you're looking for, I guess."

"Here," Miki handed him her own compact mirror, before returning her focus to finding the right colour for him. "Ohh this is nice!" She barely heard him say.

"Umm miss?" Miki approached the clerk who had praised her earlier. "If you don't mind, I was wondering if you could help me with selecting the right lip colour that would go well with his eyeshadow?" 

She then laughed sheepishly afterwards. "I'm not too well-versed with things like colour theory, you see..."

"No worries, I would love to help!" The clerk smiled brightly at her in return. "Just let me take a closer look again so I can help you find the right fit!"

"Oh that kinda looks sexy, don't you think?" Maehara commented as he and Nakamura watched Miki do her work.

"That's what I thought..." Miki almost whispered, carefully applying the chosen colour onto Chiba's lips.

"Must be nice," Nakamura suddenly blurted out after quietly watching for a while. 

"Which is...?"

"Working on those kinds of lips," she answered.

Miki hummed in agreement, now blending out the pigment with a small brush. "I find it easier to apply technique if your workspace is wide enough."

"No wonder I struggled with this guy..." Nakamura let out a disappointed sigh, barely gesturing towards Maehara. "There's barely any space to work on with how small his lips actually are."

Miki nearly choked at the revelation. "Wait, they are?" Failing to suppress an amused grin, she turned to look at a now annoyed Maehara to see it for herself.

"Oh, the colour's nice. Good choice," she first complemented, taking note of how well the faint coral tint goes with Maehara's warm skin tone and brown hair. "You did a great job applying it, Rio. It doesn't even look like he's wearing anything on his lips."

"Ahee~" Nakamura grinned widely at the. compliment.

Miki cracked a smile. "But yeah, somehow it made it obvious how small his lips actually are," chuckling, she turned back to Chiba and continued her work. "Even I just noticed it."

"I don't know how I am supposed to feel right now..."

Nakamura nudged Maehara with a cheeky grin. "Hey, at least she basically said the colour looks good on you~"

"I would honestly be more convinced if she wasn't still mad at me..." Maehara sighed in disappointment.

"If only you never lied to me~" Miki hummed, not even once looking at him.

Maehara groaned in response. "C'mon Miki, that was way back in April. Can't you just drop it?"

"I think we're done here!" Miki suddenly announced, standing up straight after minutes of leaning. 

Maehara sighed again, not surprised that she was purposely ignoring him. He's more than aware that last month's discourse with Kaho truly had him lose Miki's trust. He just didn't think that she was the type to hold grudges for this long.

"I don't know about you, but I think it'd better if you just stop bringing it up to her every other day?" Nakamura said in a low voice, quirking an eyebrow at him. "Like no offense, Maehara-kun, but if I we're in Miki's position right now I'd be annoyed too."

"Rio, can you help me put back the testing palettes to their shelves?" Miki called out now from the other end of the aisle.

Sending Maehara one last look, Nakamura walked towards the taller blonde. "Sure~"

Maehara was then once again back to awkwardly standing by the shelves. However, it didn't take too long for them to return the testing products to their respective shelves.

"Say, Ryuu. You want me to remove all that now or are you planning to just leave it on?" Miki called out despite her hands currently full.

Chiba was examining Miki's work through the long mirror on top of the shelves. "Hmm I think I'll just leave it on and take it off myself once I get home," he answered, running his hands through his hair. "The shadow work is not heavy enough to look weird to wear in public.... thankfully."

"Yeah it doesn't look like you're wearing much," Nakamura commented, walking away from the counter near the aisle and towards him. 

Most of the heavy shadow work Miki had done were on Chiba's lower lids and on the outer corner of his eyes. Hence why, unlike earlier when he had them half-closed, which made them look more obvious, they were barely noticeable now that he was looking ahead.

"Kinda looks like you're just wearing eyeliner with some colour here and there," Nakamura added with a slight grin. "You look good though, by the way."

"Thanks," Chiba replied almost shyly, though his following smile was making it more prominent. "My stage makeup is much heavier than this, especially the shadow work. Miki tends to go all out around my lower lashes especially..." He explained to them briefly, though more to Maehara since the guy looked kind of lost for a moment.

Maehara nodded in understanding. "Ahh that explains why it doesn't feel the same as last week's..."

Chiba hummed in reply, proceeding to mess with his hair again. "It's getting hotter outside but I can't leave my hair loose like this. I don't have anything to have it up," he briefly gathered his hair again, as if he was planning to tie it into a ponytail, but soon let go of it. 

"...can't even wear it down with all the makeup now," he sighed, brushing it again with his fingers.

"Just tolerate the heat and make do with the bucket hat," Nakamura suggested, handing Chiba his white bucket hat which now that he thought about it, he had no idea how she even got a hold of it in the first place.

Maehara watched as Chiba brushed all of his hair backwards before putting on the hat. "Hey, don't pull it too down."

"Nah I'll look weird otherwise."

Maehara raised an eyebrow at his response. "What are you talking about? I'm pretty good-looking myself-"

Nakamura let out a gagging noise.

"but even I can- Will you stop that?!" Maehara hissed at Nakamura, who only stuck her tongue out to him in response.

Taking off the bucket hat, Chiba approached the counter where Miki was still waiting in line. "Miki, do you have anything with you?" He asked rather tiredly. "Hair tie, clip, a beanie, or just anything I can use?"

"Let me check," Miki quickly went through her tote bag. "Ah I have my beanie, though it's those bigger types..." She brought out a red beanie and handed it to him.

Chiba happily took it from her hands. "Oh I have one like this in blue, thanks!" 

He went back to where Maehara and Nakamura stood and immediately wore the beanie. Tucking the rest of his hair behind his ears, Chiba looked at the mirror in mild satisfaction. "Hmm yep I guess that does it."

"Cute," Nakamura cheekily commented, thus ruining Chiba's composure as he broke into a shy smile.

"Be quiet," he muttered, turning his head away from the now grinning duo.

"Is it even fine for you to be seen with us on a Sunday afternoon?" Maehara suddenly brought up when they left the store.

"I think it's fine," Nakamura answered before Chiba even opened his mouth. "We took pictures last week and I posted some of mine on twitter too. So, it shouldn't be surprising to people that 'Lead Guitarist-kun' is hanging out with people his age on a weekend."

Miki hummed in agreement. "He's just a rather popular member of a local band in this town," she then scoffed, "not a damn celebrity for him to be not seen in public."

"That's true but I'm talking about us being class E students," Maehara turned to Chiba. "Since the reason why you even hid this whole band thing from us was so that people won't find out that you're a class E student technically participating in club activities," he elaborated.

Chiba nodded in confirmation. "You're right. But as they said, it's fine."

They all came to a stop before the pedestrian lane, waiting for the stoplight to turn green.

"We're not wearing our uniforms, so it'll be hard for people to even recognize you guys as students from class E.... let alone wonder why I'm hanging out with you," he reassured with a small smile.

"Exactly," Miki agreed before wincing when the sunlight suddenly came back. "Anyways, you guys got any place y'all want to go to? I don't like the sun..."

Maehara scoffed at her last remark. "Are you a vampire or something? Anyways, I want to go-"

"If you say Marui, I will deck you."

"Come on now. I didn't even say anything!"

"That place is on the other side of the town, you dumbass, and I'm about to die here."

"A little sunlight won't kill you!"

Nakamura just watched the two continuously bicker and turned to Chiba with a grin. "There's a cafe nearby just across the lane. Wanna go there and get some of their iced offers?"

"That works," he replied with a fairly amused smile.

[whereconfusionisarhyme]

First Reactions To Logan’s Playlist

K first song let’s do this

White and Nerdy-Weird Al Yankovic

Wtf this song was definitely Joan’s idea I mean who else would think of ‘White and Nerdy’ for Logan

Is this like canon he listens to this stuff or like songs about him???

Not Perfect-Tim Minchin

TIM MINCHIN

Bo Burnham better be on Logan's playlist

#deep

Is this about the mindpalace/inside of Thomas’ head??? Cause like???? Ouch???? I think????

Lol nvm it’s not sad lmao

I take back my take back it is sad

So this could be literally “in his mind” or it could be figurative and it’s really messing with my funky flow

Streaks-ANIMA!

Cool instrumental

Love the voice sounds a little like MARINA and Regina Spektor

Oh no I’m two lines in and I can tell it’s gonna be sad

OH NO CONFORMITY RELATED ANGST AHHHHH

Wow Logan is just out here being relatable isn’t he smh 😔👊

"Cause you're a smart kid, but you're still a kid" LOGAN REALLY BE OUT HERE BEING RELATABLE ON MAIN

The Elements-Tom Lehrer

Sounds like what piano class would sound like if I took piano class

Something you would listen to in science class

Bop

Medicine-STRFCKR

A Fever You Can't Sweat Out vibes

Lmao nvm

Gonna go look up the lyrics rn brb

A sad bop

Philosophy cool

Human-Tank And The Bangas

Logan playing this to comfort himself because this singer is the only person who has ever told him this

WHO HURT LOGAN WITH THEIR WORDS

LOGAN THE HEART SKIPPING COMMENT ARE YOU OKAY IM GIVING YOU A HUG

GUYS LOGAN IS TRYING TO CONVINCE HIMSELF THAT HE MATTERS IM NOT OKAY

Last???? Relationship???

Okay I'm not a shipper BUT my theorist analysis obsessed brain is just SCREAMING about Roman and Patton

Observation: Logan is probably atheistic and this song covers God a lot. I don't have a conclusion or anything just pointing that out

This woman do be calming tho like yes I'm beautiful yes I'm special thank you

Okay so I already knew Logan wasn't okay but he 100% isn't okay

Fittet Happier-Radiohead

K two words in and I can tell this is gonna be sad here we go

Employees? Or maybe…other sides?

Minor key ok

SELF HARM ISNT OKAY

"WILL NOT CRY IN PUBLIC" NONONONO

So I heard of a good therapist just downtown-

The Watchtower-The Dø

I paused it cause I need a second after the last one

Guys as someone who dissosiates a lot I think Logan might be dissosiating

Dissosiating to protect himself from his emotions

Y'all just trust me in this one

Coming for the TØP brand I see

K ready to start again here we go

Fire beat I'm vibing with it

Is he trying to distance himself from his emotions to try and perform his tasks better like watching from a Watchtower???

This is the first character I've seen that might dissosiate which only means one thing

I'm gonna be projecting an unholy amount in my fanfiction

"No one in particular" hon who hurt you

City Lights=Emotions (which he considers distractions)??? Maybe??

I'm a William Finn fan come on this isn't my first rodeo

Art Is Dead-Bo Burnham

BO BURNHAM I WAS RIGHT

We all love some good Imposter Syndrome (tm)! :D

This gives Learning New Things About Ourselves' a whole new meaning

Ngl this is the first time I heard the degrading of the piano at the end and I'm here for it

In My Mind-Amanda Palmer

Oop we LOVE setting up impossible expectations for yourself to the point you have a cripplingly horrid self esteem! :D

Logan I've done this before and trust me it isn't worth it the mental breakdowns are too taxing

I'll do it when I'm older=I'm never gonna get around to it

I don't wanna be the person I wanna be either

Why do I perfectly understand every lyric am I ok

Live!!! While you!!!! Can!!!!

At least there's a happy ending

Okay so I've decided that once I'm done I'm gonna make a list of songs I think would fit in the playlist

Algorythym-Childish Gambino

K its spelled incorrectly get ready for some metaphors my dudes

Intro is cool definitely very very Logan WOAH OKAY CHAIN SMOKER

Gonna go look up lyrics I don't understand shit

The chorus sounds like Thanksgiving at my Aunt's house where like 100+ African American relatives blast house music and dance until their feet falls off

Nvm no it doesn't

GO OFF

ELPHABA BETTER WATCH OUT CHILDISH GAMBINO IS COMING FOR YOUR BELT

Adlibs are everything

Letter C-Zach Sherwin

This gives off the same vibes as that one pickle video by Charlie Puth

Roman vs Logan rap battle but it's this

I don't really see why this is related but sure

Time Adventure-The Marcus Hedgehog

Nostalgiaaaaaa

Okay Logan has too many songs talking about one (1) person who is it

I have a gut feeling that it's about Thomas and how Logan used to be enough "back then" but now he thinks he's not cause like let's be honest when was the last time someone gave Logan a strong sincere thank you for all that he does????Excluding DWIT (which doesn't really count in my opinion cause they said he was cool, not like an integral and arguably the most important and powerful side) nobody really appreciates Logan???? Hugs???

Anyway plz ignore this is just how my brain works

K next song

The Breach-clipping.

OKAY SLOW DOWN IM GONNA LOOK UP LYRICS

Is this Daveed Diggs???? I haven't listened to Hamilton in like forever is this Daveed Diggs???

LITERALLY PERFECY PARRALLEL TO LOGAN AND THE SIDES

Sound effects

Really just gonna fry my eardrums like that huh

What I Do For U-Ra Ra Riot

Okay scrap anything and everything I said about it being the sides Logan is 100% talking about Character!Thomas

Erase Me-Ben Folds Five

Ooh this intro reminds me of this one particular musical songs but I don't remember which one

Wait have I listened to this before????

I've listened to this before!

Okay I need to stop being distracted

NOOOOOO don't Erase Yourself!!!!

Logan really just do be having no Self Esteem don't he

Okay so theory: Logan didn't pop up in person in the last video because his eyes were too red from crying

I have 0 evidence so it's not a very good theory but…

Just throwing it out there

One More Time with Feeling-Regina Spektor

Oh no it's Regina Spektor

Oh no I'm gonna cry

Okay so Logan doesnt wanna block of all emotion, only permit some to show???? But most of the time block everything????

Did I get that???

Nobody!!!! Thanks!!!! Logan!!!!

Awww he just wants love and recognition

Tbh this sounds a lot like Roman they have so much in common despite their constant arguing

Galaxy Song-Monty Python

Ooh Monty Python

I haven't listened to Monty Python so I sadly don't know the context

Really just dissing all of the other sides aren't we

Can't really blame him tho

Very scientific

"Yeau~"

Sweet with dark undertones. Love it.

Equation-Hans Zimmer

Later I'm gonna check the equations if they're correct XD

Sunrise-In The Heights

!!!!!!

WHO???!!!!!

K to this is one of my favorite love songs ever it's just so sweet and as someone who's bilingual the concept is just amazingly wonderful so yeah I may be freaking out

Also because WHO??!!

Okay I said I wasn't a shipper but let's be honest this is probably about Roman not romantically but like

OR MAYBE JANUS???

IM SO CONFUSED

But Logan is definitely Nina in this situation it just fits so well with her character for the same reasons I really wanna play her (but never will cause I'm exactly 0% Latin American smh) yeah the pressures to be the smartest and then it backfiring horribly and oh God what if Inùtil is also in the playlist ahhhh

Okay moving on

Lifeboat-Heathers

WHAT

NO

NO

CONFORMITY RELATED ANGST LOGAN STOP BEING RELATABLE AHHHH

IS THIS CAPTAIN THOMAS??? THE OTHER SIDES AS A WHOLE??? AN ABSTRACT CONCEPT???

IM NOT OKAY

Bohemian Groove-Will Connolly

Okay I'm still not recovered from the last song but I need to continue or else I'm never gonna finish this playlist

Eeecccchhhhhoooo

Your friends haven't surpassed you Logan you belong with them okay????

Emptiness despite success??? Millennial who???

Vibing with it but also are you okay

Nvm I know the answer already

Hug All Ur Friends-Cavetown

Okay so Logan is a Cavetown gay noted

Self validation??? Who's she???

Lies. You care so much about what other people *sides* think about you

Maybe Logan listens to this song to remind himself to not care too much

But it doesn't work and it's getting to him more and more

Oh

That took a turn

Breathin'-Thomas Sanders

Good move

Don't really have much to say on this

The Bidding

Spoopy

Alchoholic!Logan

New idea for us fan writers

The pronunciation of beurgoise

Okay I'm like pretty certain at this point that all of the songs that mention a someone else is about Character!Thomas

A Better Version

OHMYGOD I LOVE THIS MUSICAL ITS SO UNDERRATED I HAVE LISTENED TO THE SOUNDTRACK AND UNGODLY AMOUNT OF TIMES YESSSSS

But also since I know the song in terrified cause the feels are gonna come in I just know it

Wait so is Jayce supposed to be Thomas???

I am suddenly feeling much more uncertain about my certainty

Okay let me unpause and just listen to it (even though I already know all of the lyrics)

Okay so I'm a dumbass and apparently this song isn't even part of the playlist

Okay so I'm an idiot and the last few songs have all been "related to playlist" and not in the actual playlist I'm big dumb.

Anyway here's my list of songs I think would fit. (BTW, I only went off of lyrics for these ones. I realize that there’s a general sound and vibe for the playlist, but I decided not to follow it.)

Oh No! ~ MARINA

Hug All Ur Friends ~ Cavetown

Bohemian Groove ~ Will Connolly

Guiltless ~ Dodie Clark

Lifeboat ~ Laurens O’Keefe

The Bidding ~ *idk who*

I Am Not A Robot ~ MARINA

Inútil - Lin Manuel Miranda

Through The Eyes Of A Child ~ AURORA

Community Gardens ~ The Scary Jokes

Let me know if I should do this with the other playlists as well! :)

[punkscowardschampions]

James & Ava

James: I can't see you today Ava: Oh Ava: Well, that's a shame James: it is Ava: What are you up to? James: my dad wants me in the office Ava: Ahh, okay Ava: Well no worries, Monday then James: I won't let anything stop me Ava: I understand Ava: It's cool James: if I can find time to call you later, hearing your voice would make me feel better about a lot of things Ava: That'd be nice Ava: really nice James: missing you is the nicest cliche I think I've experienced James: for a long time Ava: I can't stop thinking about you Ava: so it's good to know you've thought about me too James: of course I have James: I am James: it's what's going to get me through today Ava: Oh James Ava: I'm going to talk to you all day, in my head James: I was going to take you to [insert a cute date location that wouldn't take very long to get to because he wouldn't have had long] so make sure you tell me what you think Ava: Would it be entirely too tragic for me to go alone and pretend you're with me? James: no more tragic than if I ask you to take enough pictures for me to be able to pretend that I'm there Ava: Of course Ava: I owe you for my picture of you 🥰 James: you don't owe me anything James: I'd give you so much more if I could Ava: Me too, I wish I could take pictures just for you Ava: Have to get old school and get a P.O. box James: or keep them on your phone & show me when you can Ava: That I can do James: but will you? Ava: If you tell me how much you want it James: the only thing I want more is to see you in person Ava: I really, really miss you Ava: It, I can feel it James: I'm really sorry, darling Ava: It's not your fault Ava: and it reminds me it's real James: It's my fault James: I could stand up to my dad & say I don't want to work there Ava: If it were that simple, you would've Ava: it's security for your family Ava: you can't just do it without a backup plan in place Ava: least of all for me James: I should have a backup plan James: it's bullshit that I don't Ava: You can make one Ava: you'll have a degree and experience now Ava: you can at least apply to other places with that, get out from under your dad, then think about what you want longterm after that James: Oh Ava Ava: You can, and you will Ava: You're like just finished with Uni now Ava: who knows what they're doing before then, you only have to front you do because children James: I want you to be right Ava: I am Ava: You're smart and driven and good James: how do you know? Ava: Because I said, you can't live like this forever Ava: and you won't Ava: what's the alternative? James: that actually she's right James: everything she says & thinks about me Ava: She's not Ava: She's not right about anything and she knows it Ava: that's why she has to go so hard James: you're right because you said I need you & I do Ava: I'm right because it's true Ava: you're worthy of good things, James James: I'm not a good person, Ava James: I'm barely a person at all Ava: But you are, James Ava: You're a person Ava: whether she wants that or not James: Jay can start boarding school in a year, I've already made that plan Ava: Is that what you want? James: it's what she needs Ava: Okay, so that's a start then James: I don't want to send her away but I don't want her to stay here Ava: Once you've sorted the rest, you can bring her back Ava: She's young, kids are so resilient James: It was so much easier when she was too young to understand what was being said or done Ava: Yeah Ava: I see that, with my family Ava: it's all okay until it needs to be explained Ava: because it can't be explained, or isn't James: exactly James: what words am I ever going to be able to find to make it okay? there aren't any Ava: Actions count Ava: and you love them Ava: that counts for so much James: will it count for enough? James: my actions certainly aren't good enough Ava: Almost definitely Ava: I can't say 100% but a good 99% James: you don't have to say anything James: I'm in my wet clothes today, that's all Ava: You don't have to excuse yourself, ever James: don't I? Ava: Not with me James: that wipes out well over half of my current vocabulary, just so you're aware James: it won't be an excuse that I'm speechless around you Ava: We'll work it out together Ava: I don't mind not talking for a while and just James: I'm going to be here until it's very late but if you can get away, I'll say I'm staying even later Ava: Yes Ava: I can make it happen Ava: People are here but I can get out James: me too then Ava: I don't care if it's five minutes Ava: well, I do Ava: but I'll take it James: I definitely do James: but it won't be James: the girls will be asleep before I'm done, I'm not rushing home for her Ava: Then rush to see me James: I promise James: I know you don't want me to, but I do Ava: As far as promises go Ava: that's a pretty good one Ava: they're like cliches James: I'll work through lunch for the possibility you'll be awake by the time I'm allowed to leave Ava: I can catnap if necessary James: oh, well now that's a mental picture I wish I had Ava: Sadly I can't take photos of myself sleeping Ava: and I don't think I can promise I'll waste any time with you napping Ava: 🤔 James: I'm so very conflicted James: what a dilemma James: but we'll be able to solve it when my dad decides I can be trusted on business trips Ava: 🤤🤤🤤 Ava: Please come through for me J I James: knowing him it'll take a while but I'll come through so he'll have no choice but to do the same Ava: All the faith Ava: and Monday when you come over you can have a preview of what to expect Ava: for motivation James: in order for you to keep it & for him to begin to harbour any, I should go James: but I feel very motivated at the thought, so thank you Ava: You've got this Ava: Later, love James: [let's skip then chicken, come at me drunkenly lol] Ava: You probably can't reply Ava: but I wish you were here James: [a dramatically long pause because imagine how extra weekends would be] James: but you're having fun? Ava: Hey ☺️ James: hi Ava: It's alright Ava: everyone's going a bit hard James: I'm sure your brother would happily throw them all out for you Ava: That may be Ava: but he is not invited James: that wouldn't stop him if he's still anything like I remember Ava: 2 kids and a wife might Ava: ha James: from being a protective older brother? I don't think so James: you either are or you're not Ava: yeah but my cousin is here Ava: so no need for the 'adult' supervision Ava: it's cool James: I'm happy to hear it James: there's no opportunity for me to drag Teddy home if he's there & he wouldn't thank me for it Ava: that's a bummer Ava: though I've already sacrificed him once tonight so rude of me James: to who? Ava: said cousin Ava: he isn't actually who I had in mind but you know Ava: be weird if I ❌ James: it sounds very romantic, I have no doubt he'll be thrilled Ava: Yeah it's like Paris in here tonight James: it's like Venice here, by which I mean flooded Ava: ??? James: 🛁 Ava: ahh Ava: awh Ava: 🐥🧼🧽💙 James: so yes, I'd say I wish you were here too, but I can't Ava: that's fair Ava: someone is in my bath alas James: theirs was meant to be hours ago so the chaos is somewhat relatable Ava: uh-oh Ava: I did think it was more like 💤🛌🌃 James: it's actually really far past that time too Ava: yeah Ava: you must be knackered James: if only I could join you in a drink Ava: There's still plenty 🍾🍾 Ava: I'll leave a full one out on the step Ava: for the milkman, like James: 😂 thank you, Ava Ava: my curtsy is so real James: that reminds me, I like your outfit Ava: 🥰 Ava: you're always nice Ava: are you wet? James: drenched, of course James: but actually not in the metaphorical sense Ava: Yay Ava: I'm happy James: are you smiling? Ava: cheeeeeese James: 📷 Ava: I'll take a real one for you Ava: but not right now James: [the longest pause ever like is he gone or what? but no he's just trying to sort the chaos out of course] James: later is an undeniably tempting prospect Ava: all dry Ava: what are you doing now Ava: a story James: well guessed James: would you like to pick it for us? Ava: You have to make one up Ava: a happy ending, naturally James: & there has to be a dog involved or Jay will be very angry indeed Ava: Frank! James: Oh right, I forgot you have one Ava: He's very angry indeed Ava: 😡 James: about the party? Ava: No Ava: about being forgotten Ava: he isn't actually here he's been dogknapped James: he'll forgive you Ava: me! James: yes Ava: you forgot him Ava: he's devastated James: you haven't taken enough selfies with him Ava: are you questioning my love James: I'm not but he could be, that's what I'm saying Ava: this is a sad story James: I'll do a re-write Ava: good idea Ava: he's on holiday James: working on his tan James: you two are very competitive about it Ava: well we've gotta be summer ready Ava: his diet is going awfully though James: he's lucky he doesn't need to go on one James: it was purely hypothetical Ava: he likes baked beans with the lil sausages in James: what do you like? I can't picture him happily sharing Ava: 🤔 Ava: that's a big question Ava: chinese food James: [when you know he's gonna send her some tomorrow for the hangover bye] James: can you use chopsticks? Ava: yes Ava: v dexterous Ava: shame that's not a sexy skill Ava: like cherry stems James: it could be James: you doing it Ava: 🥢 grab your tongue with that boy Ava: 🤭 James: it could work to shut me up James: but it's only making me laugh right now Ava: I like when you talk Ava: and laugh James: I used to be able to do that cherry stem party trick Ava: you'll have to show me Ava: we'll get some, see if you can do it James: It's been years, I probably can't Ava: you don't lose skills like that James: it's not a real skill, it's a boast Ava: yeah Ava: an implication of other skills, I know James: we all tried it out to mock the girls over how 'easy' it was but only a few of us could do it actually Ava: wink wink nudge nudge is how boys do Ava: 'course Ava: don't always have to back up a boast James: especially when it's one you made in another life Ava: nah Ava: i'll judge you and be so disappointed James: Ava! that's outrageous Ava: that's me James: you're supposed to not even be hypothetically disappointed by me Ava: I'm also not meant to lie to you James: okay, I'm backed into a corner, now what? Ava: what I would do to you if I had you in a dark corner right now is not suitable bedtime story-telling Ava: unless you wanna be up all night James: some stories demand to be told regardless James: & I wouldn't be upset about being kept up for as long as this one takes to be told Ava: You're the storyteller Ava: I'm a journalist, I like to report what happens James: [writes her a very sexy essay right here and right now about the life they should be living in the dark corner, like soz Jimothy you've been usurped as the writer & poet in residence] James: well then, you can tell me what's happening to you Ava: I don't know if I can describe that Ava: how you make me feel Ava: like you're here Ava: the only person here James: I think you've described it perfectly Ava: you are perfect James: no Ava: yes James: Ava Ava: James James: you're not meant to lie to me Ava: I'm not James: it's not true, it can't be Ava: opinion can't be wrong Ava: you can say i'm not well-informed if you wanna Ava: but i'll still think it James: I'm not at your party, I won't ever be able to be there Ava: you don't have to be at my party James: but you wish I was James: that's compromise, it can't be perfection Ava: only 'cos I'd rather be with you Ava: because you're so perfect James: if I don't give you what you want, I'm not perfect Ava: i want you Ava: as you Ava: i can miss you and i can wait Ava: i don't need anything else from you James: I don't know who I am Ava: i see who you are Ava: who you could be James: but I could become someone else James: like my dad wants James: like my wife wants Ava: you can't change who you are Ava: even when you try really hard James: you can lose who you are though James: & I have Ava: I'm telling you, I can see you Ava: even if you can't James: when you stop looking at me, it's going to be really hard Ava: I'll only stop if you tell me to Ava: no other reason James: if I tell you to it'll only be because I have to James: for your own sake Ava: you don't have to worry about me James: it's not the 1st time I've done this or had to stop doing it James: I know I have to worry about you Ava: i don't think i'm special Ava: but i know you like me too James: I think you're very special Ava: but i don't care if you can't be with me Ava: well, i do Ava: but i mean i'll be your friend no matter what Ava: you need me and no one can stop me Ava: not your wife or my brother or anyone James: the problem isn't who my wife is or who your brother is, the problem is that I don't care James: that's dangerous Ava: i said i wouldn't cause trouble Ava: and i won't let you get into any either Ava: not 'til you're ready to face it James: I've never met anyone like you before James: it's the most ridiculous cliche Ava: i know Ava: and I've never felt like this before Ava: so there we go two for two James: it's none of my business & you're under no obligation to answer me, but is that because you've not dated a lot of people before or in spite of everyone that you have dated? Ava: you're so cute Ava: I've dated plenty of people Ava: I liked a lot of them, some of them I thought I loved but then it was easy to be friends with them so I don't know, I think it was just that Ava: this is different, whatever it is and whatever they were James: understood Ava: did you date much James: I wasn't looking for that when I was in school & I'm not allowed to seek it out now James: I had a lot of sex before I got married & after but it's far from the same thing Ava: sure Ava: you weren't getting to know them as well as Ava: that's how lots of people operate James: I didn't intend to get to know you, Ava James: I don't know how it happened Ava: I'm not going to apologize for it James: please don't Ava: can i ask you something though James: of course Ava: did you just wanna sleep with me 'cos you thought i was cute or was it anything to do with who my brother is James: why would it be anything to do with him? Ava: i don't know Ava: 'cept i know him and i know there's history there James: I don't hold any grudges against him, we were all liars & fakes then James: all I cared about was my expensive drug habit & sleeping with as many girls as possible Ava: okay, i just had to ask Ava: things can be confusing enough without worrying about shit that ain't even real James: there's history for you too, it's not about any of that, is it? Ava: no Ava: it isn't James: my wife & your sister have so much history James: honestly more than me & her have Ava: i know Ava: but i'm not gonna exact revenge on her behalf via you James: I doubt she'd want that, she's not Chloé James: I don't believe there's anyone capable of holding onto something for as long & as tightly as she can Ava: I don't know Ava: I'm sure her therapist would tell her grudges are pointless but I don't reckon she can live that truth James: at least she has a therapist Ava: hooray for her James: I should probably get one, instead of talking to you like you are Ava: its what you should do Ava: talk to people Ava: work it out together Ava: nancy can't talk to anyone James: all my adult conversations are carefully overseen & orchestrated, it's only her laziness and the inescapable necessity of my parenting that has stopped the way I talk to my children from being put under the same restrictions James: what she did to Nancy was James: & that's only what I can remember Ava: its fucked James: it's already started with Jay James: if I can't find a way to stop it Ava: you have to James: I know Ava: you know its abuse don't you James: It doesn't matter what I know if nobody else knows it James: believes it Ava: how can they not, everyone knows what a total insane bitch she is Ava: sorry James: you don't need to apologise for telling the truth Ava: i'm not trying to make getting out sound easy though when it so clearly isn't James: it wouldn't be that hard for me to get out Ava: with the kids, or access to, though James: she says Jay's not mine whenever I criticise anything she says or does regarding her James: maybe she isn't James: her sex life was as active & varied as mine was Ava: wait Ava: what James: it's what she says if my bags are packed & nothing else has worked James: because I'd never see her again if she's not biologically my daughter James: but she can't say it about Matty, the dates line up too well Ava: are you on Jay's birth certificate? James: yes Ava: then you either are, and you have rights, or she knowingly lied on an official document but also, gave you full parental rights in the process Ava: if she really is lying then she has to incriminate herself and there's more than a case in your favour James: I don't know Ava: she got you to marry her under false pretenses, she stole years of your life James: it'll just be more of her bullshit James: of course she's my kid Ava: she'd do that? Ava: jesus James: she'll say & do anything to stop me from leaving James: in other circumstances it'd be flattering Ava: does she love you James: does it sound like love? Ava: no think she loves you then James: she thinks she's come this far James: not many of my friends would have agreed to marry her if they'd been put in the same situation James: if any, from the ones I had at the time Ava: i just wanna know what she gets from it Ava: she doesn't work or go to school, right? Ava: you seem to do most of the parenting James: isn't that the answer then? she gets a lifestyle that started out easy financially thanks to my parents & has been made easy by me in every other aspect James: I told you, it's my fault Ava: okay, granted but like she's happy to settle for not being crazy in love, just tolerating her kids and having no ambition of her own? at 22, 23? its not as if her parents would let her starve, Christ.. it'd be sad if she weren't evil and happy to take down you and the kids with her James: as I also told you, I've given up trying to figure her out Ava: sorry James: no, I am James: you don't need to worry about this Ava: yeah i do James: no James: you're a 17 year old at a party, Ava James: you shouldn't be worrying about anything Ava: don't patronize me James: that's not how I mean it James: I like you & she'll take you down too if you aren't careful James: I don't want that Ava: no she won't James: if you think that we shouldn't do this Ava: do what James: see each other as much as we are Ava: why not Ava: because i'm not duly afraid of chloe James: because you don't understand the risks Ava: again, don't patronize me James: do you want to end up like your sister? Ava: that won't happen James: it could happen James: & I'm not worth it Ava: it won't Ava: if you don't want to see me then that's your choice Ava: i think you're making a mistake but you're entitled James: I do want to see you James: I so badly want to Ava: then don't put a stop to us James: just please be careful Ava: I'm not afraid to like you James: Ava Ava: I'm just not, okay Ava: and even if i were, i couldn't stop myself and i won't so there James: you're really gonna age me horrifically, aren't you? James: 👴 Ava: well i do only like you 'cos you're older, obviously James: well, the back cover of the book can be all my worry lines Ava: 😂 Ava: sexy James: I can't make everything I do sexy like you do, darling Ava: don't joke i'm trying so hard to seduce you here 😏 James: I'm not joking James: you are & everything you do is Ava: Monday needs to be here now James: will you dance with me when it is, because we can't now Ava: only if you hold me really close and even tighter James: that I can do Ava: come on Ava: say you will James: of course I will Ava: James James: yes? Ava: I wish I could call you James: I'll go outside to smoke, wait a minute Ava: me too Ava: can't hear myself in here James: [another dramatic pause] James: okay Ava: the perks of being one of the only smokers Ava: and its warm out still Ava: i love summer James: it's a bad habit, but I've had worse James: & I still like winter the most somehow Ava: sorry it looks sexy and I've got a rep to maintain Ava: when were you born are you a winter baby James: January Ava: knew it Ava: awh its not your birthday for ages James: & you only like me because I'm older, I remember James: you must be truly devastated Ava: mhmm Ava: hurry up and hit 30 so we can really make it a moment James: you'll have me looking 30 soon enough James: all these smoke breaks Ava: not if you get to talking please and thank you James: you're supposed to be calling me James: as you wished it Ava: oh Ava: wanna facetime Ava: assuming 🥴 this is not my face James: you could still 'make a moment' I'm sure James: & I probably look better blurry Ava: shut up Ava: you're beautiful James: so you don't want to talk to me, you want to look at me? James: understood Ava: I wanna listen to you talk Ava: [ring him bitch] James: [telling her a story of everything he wants to do on Monday & it's hot & cute & funny & a mood] Ava: you're so so lovely Ava: stick around please James: you're quite drunk Ava: if I was drunk I'd say lots more James: you are so you can James: I'm listening Ava: no Ava: 🙈 James: you're not afraid of my scary wife but you're afraid of me? Ava: no Ava: but I'm scared of feeling crazy, being Ava: a little madness is key but James: I don't think genuinely crazy people are that self-aware typically Ava: maybe James: You're not crazy, Ava Ava: thank you Ava: probably not curtsy worthy but still James: you've devastated me, but I'll hide it expertly Ava: 😞 nooooooo James: I'll dedicate a suitable amount of book pages to it James: but otherwise, be utterly unaffected Ava: as long as that's the only conflict you're planning Ava: know it propels plot but I'll be very sad James: you'll get your happy ending, that means more to me Ava: you too James: that'll require a very long re-write Ava: maybe Ava: the middle can be shit though Ava: think that's writing 101 James: 😂 Ava: come on Ava: reluctant hero is a great trope James: I'm more of an anti-hero James: it's less about reluctance & more that I lack the necessity attributes, like courage or a trustworthy nature Ava: there's plenty different ways to be a hero Ava: there's plenty different ways to be heroes Ava: it isn't all capes and a misplaced sense of authority and vigilante justice James: I'm aware of that, but isn't the advice to write what you know? I'm hardly surrounded by viable examples James: you can't play every role, darling Ava: or write for the life you wanna have, the person you wanna be Ava: usually advice reserved for making you buy shit suits but I think it applies James: that explains why I've never heard it, in that case Ava: 😏 you were born in a tailored three-piece right James: if my parents were authoring the story, absolutely Ava: as much as parents love me Ava: probably not result in my happy ending James: or mine Ava: no Ava: we'll save that meet-cute James: thank you James: though it's unlikely I'll curtsy either Ava: shame James: I can add it to Monday's to-do list if your heart is set Ava: Your Monday sounds very busy as is Ava: I wanna help you relax and feel good not run yourself into the ground with curtsies etc James: you're sweet Ava: come taste me James: your party guests are bound to notice me Ava: I know Ava: I'd make them all leave if you could though Ava: but you can't James: no, I can't Ava: it's not long to wait Ava: just feels it James: it'll go faster for you, half of it spent in bed Ava: ha Ava: actually will have to entertain children too, worst of all my brother Ava: he's as annoying as he is protective etc and will definitely make me spend time with him before he leaves so we can have Monday James: it's a shame a playdate is out of the question Ava: even if I stole his Ava: can imagine your wife's joy to bump into us at the park James: she'll be far too busy shopping or having brunch with her friends Ava: then tell me it's still not feasible before I think it actually is James: it's a bad idea James: isn't it? Ava: it must be Ava: it's too good James: your brother wants to see you, he'd probably invite himself anyway, right? Ava: Probably Ava: but what if I show up really early and annoy him all day Ava: hype the kids up too James: 😈 Ava: there is one problem James: is there? Ava: my cousin will probably wanna come Ava: idk how I'm telling her no James: you said you'd already sacrificed my brother to her once James: how did that go? Ava: I've not been 👀 on 'em Ava: but I see 😈 what you're saying James: if get Jay to insist that he brings himself & a jumper for goalposts, he might Ava: oh Ava: no we can't James: you don't think it'll work? Ava: I told her some stuff Ava: not about you specifically Ava: but she can't meet you, obviously, she's not daft James: why would you do that, Ava? Ava: I didn't tell her anything James: that's obviously not true Ava: well she has no idea who you are James: you can't tell anyone about us James: I shouldn't even have to be saying that Ava: I haven't Ava: I told her about a boy Ava: I'm sorry but it's not going to affect anything Ava: she's not from here, she's not gonna say anything and she's got nothing to say anyway James: if you've told her enough that she could figure out who I am from seeing me at the park, you've told her too much Ava: I'm saying if your brother is there, it's just obvious Ava: I'm trying to be careful James: it doesn't matter, I'll see you Monday as previously arranged Ava: Well it does Ava: I'm sorry Ava: I'm just saying I don't think I can pretend you're just Teddy's brother, there's no point James: I agree Ava: I can tell her it fizzled out soon okay James: like you said, it won't affect anything Ava: you're still angry James: it's a frustrating situation Ava: yes James: I'm not angry at you James: I shouldn't have done this Ava: Be angry at me Ava: it was stupid but I'm not Ava: I won't tell anyone anything James: I know you're not, how smart you are is one of the 1st things I noticed James: but I obviously need to be smarter Ava: You don't want to do this James: I think we should slow down, you won't have to lie to your cousin & I won't get so carried away Ava: okay James: it's for the best Ava: alright, so what does that look like James: I don't know Ava: just let me know then James: I'll call you Ava: 👍 James: okay Ava: later then