#though his anatomy is just plain bad. and awkward.

[frostbytte]

giant repressed guys <3

he's so scoliosis...

also original reference came from @mellon_soup for the original public reference (i blocked out certain parts in colors for each person then sketched over top of that part. then i moved the sketch layer around till i got it to where i wanted it. Hydros required me to do this TWICE.)

He’s height shifted to be like. Slightly above the human average. He’s not a fan of being eye to eye with anyone but he… is willing to make an exception. :3

[altumvidetur]

Haikyuu!! Fic Recs (MatsuHana)

Fic Recs Masterpost

So, I was thinking about the coronavirus pandemic and what I could do to help people out. I’m isolated because I’m at higher risk, so I can’t really offer to go out for my elderly neighbors or my family… but I thought I could try to help keep people entertained.

Because I don’t have an AO3 account right now, I’ve been compiling fic recs for my own amusement for a year or so. And I thought – maybe that’s the time to share these with everyone? So everyone will have plenty of things to read while they have to stay at home, or even to escape anxiety a little bit if you’re forced to go out.

Of course, these cater to my own tastes, so you may find stuff you don’t like around here. I never include works in progress. The Mature and Explicit works will be in italic. I ask you to READ THE WORK’S TAGS before continuing, so you won’t find anything that makes you uncomfortable.

I’ve decided to split it in a series of posts, starting with my OTPs. So here we go with some MatsuHana!

rated m for, by orphan_account

He should have known that there was a Specific Reason™ why it was so absolutely vital that he and Matsukawa specifically meet for a reading of the script. He should have known that there had to be some evil catch beyond sitting in a tiny, cramped studio with his newly sworn enemy.

Hanamaki stares at the title of the script he’d so gracefully neglected the night before.

FORBIDDEN PARADISE

“Excuse me,” Hanamaki starts, raising a pen in the air while staring blankly at the packet in his free hand. “Just to clarify, you want me to record a boy's love CD with Matsukawa?”

of weather, of leisurely tensions, by b_minor

Two boys share an umbrella.

Don’t Lie, Bright Eyes, by tookumade

“Where do you see yourself in twenty years?”

It’s nearly one in the morning and Matsukawa, tucked up comfortably in bed next to Hanamaki, is on the verge of drifting off into blissful sleep when the question stirs him.

“Why are you trying to give me a late-night existential crisis?” he mumbles.

-

(written for Haikyuu!! MatsuHana Week - Day 4 - leaving home)

Roses, by h_lovely

(Summary by me: slow burn, friends to lovers, things are kinky, I’m pretty sure this is the best MatsuHana I’ve ever read.)

You’re in Pink (and I’m in blue), by Hyeyu

Takahiro held his gaze a few seconds in silence before he sighed. "...It's only been a week, okay? S'not serious yet."

“Not serious yet?” Something jumped in Matsukawa’s jaw and he abruptly released Takahiro’s hand, sending the petals cascading to the ground. Takahiro was going to have to clean them up before the others started streaming into the clubroom, and wouldn’t that be fun. “You’re coughing up fucking flowers, Hanamaki.”

“Yeah, tell me something I don’t know.”

-

Hanamaki Takahiro has 99 problems and Hanahaki flowers make up 98 of them.

Good Bad Ideas, by tookumade

When Oikawa asks his friends to help out at his nephew’s birthday party, they get a little more than they bargained for.

(written for Haikyuu!! Rarepair Week - Day 1 - beginnings, celebration)

texting (with a capital S), by parenthetic

Hanamaki breaks his No Texting In Class rule, and it's all downhill from there.

Wet Your Whistle, by darkmagicalgirl

Hanamaki gets a job as a bartender. Matsukawa likes his uniform. (Alternatively: Matsukawa tries to ignore his huge crush on his friend-with-benefits. He fails.)

[obnoxious clucking noises], by parenthetic

On the last night of their last training camp together, Oikawa has a bad idea, Hanamaki goes along with it, Iwaizumi sort of wishes he had better friends, and Matsukawa proves himself to be particularly adept at intimidation tactics.

Love Doesn’t Come with an Instruction Manual, by plumtrees

Seijou 3rd years (now college freshmen) go to ToyCon. Oikawa has a spaz attack over Star Wars, Iwaizumi is his designated babysitter, Hanamaki is adorable, and Matsukawa doesn't know how to deal.

Here Today And There Tomorrow, by tookumade

A first meeting on opposite sides of the volleyball net, and chance meetings afterwards without it.

A Ring of Cream, by plumtrees

Hanamaki has never been one for grand romantic gestures, has never been one for romantic gestures at all, but Matsukawa's a stubborn guy.

Who can't bake for shit.

Iwaizumi and Oikawa (mostly Iwaizumi, really) to the rescue.

Morning Glory, by darkmagicalgirl

On their days off, Hanamaki and Matsukawa's mornings follow a sort of routine.

Even Though It All Went Wrong, by plumtrees

It hadn’t always been so cold. Matsukawa remembers a time where the sun shone high, its rays bright and its heat pleasant like a blanket against his skin. He remembers Hanamaki holding his hand, remembers his cheeks hurting because he’d been grinning so much. Hanamaki had opened his arms wide, and Matsukawa ran straight for them, like he’d been magnetized. He picked up Hanamaki easily and twirled them around, danced with him until they both tumbled along the grass, laughing like idiots.

He remembers because it’s all he can do now.

Crescendo, by plumtrees

Day 1 for MatsuHana Week: Online

-

The voice continues to feed him instructions, the deep rumbling purrs reverberating across his body, each hiss and click of a consonant like a sharp bite, each roll of his tongue a slide of silk against his overheating skin.

Fuck, he loves it.

Somewhat Well-Kept Secrets, by tookumade

“Why don’t they just… date already?” said Iwaizumi.

-

(written for Haikyuu!! MatsuHana Week - Day 2 - cream puffs, in the background)

It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time, by plumtrees

Day 3 of MatsuHana Week: Tattoos and Flower Shops

-

Hanamaki, cheeks as pink as his hair, says, "I was drunk."

"Okay?" Matsukawa prompts.

"And it's way too expensive to laser something this big."

Holy shit. "Okay?"

"Look, can't we just go with 'I made horrible life decisions in college that are now coming back to haunt me' and move on?"

morning, noon, night, by b_minor

A day in the life of two losers in love.

on the anatomy of crushes, by carafin

A part-by-part dissection of their relationship. Medical school AU.

-

‘See you tomorrow?’ Hanamaki asks. He’s still smiling faintly, still carrying about his usual air of quiet self-assurance, but there’s no mistaking the hopefulness in his voice. ‘On the bus, I mean.’

‘Yeah,’ Matsukawa says, and tries not to make it sound too much like a promise. ‘See you tomorrow.’

(Falling in love is really, ridiculously easy.)

Dating Is Not A Nine-To-Five, by tookumade

“What if,” said Hanamaki in a whisper, “we walk in and there’s a yakuza member getting his tattoos done, and he tries to kill us because we saw his face?”

-

(written for Haikyuu!! MatsuHana Week - Day 3 - tattoos and flower shops, coffee shop)

To Fit Myself In The Spaces Between, by tookumade

It's late, a boring movie is on TV, and the remote control is nowhere in sight—and that suited them just fine.

(written for Haikyuu!! MatsuHana Week - Day 4 - midnight, no control)

It’s not even close to your birthday, by squidmemesinc

The shoes look like they could be some kind of gothic lolita item, with thick, tall heels and Mary Jane straps that have little silver hearts on them. The socks are simple except that they run all the way up to his mid-thigh; the crisp white makes enough of a contrast with his skin that the colors flatter each other, rather than subdue them. Then there's the dress. It's just plain black, short and slim, though the skirt flares out at the waist. Takahiro's eyes run up it, stalling where it cuts off around the shoulders and has a wide boat neck trim with a thick ivory collar. The final piece is a simple pink ribbon—not even a necklace, just a ribbon—tied around his neck with the bow in the back.

Where Was I, When The Rockets Came To Life, by tookumade

In a city like this, there wasn’t much of a chance that they would meet again, and given Hanamaki’s current career of choice, if they did, then it was more than likely to be because of a cruel joke set up by fate. He was not about to let his heart be broken now. He had more important things to think about…

-

(written for Haikyuu!! MatsuHana Week - Day 5 - glasses, piercing)

not like the movies, by bravely

“Here,” he says, offering the thumb back to Hanamaki. Absentmindedly, Hanamaki licks it back off. “Thanks.”

Then he blinks.

“Wait,” he says. “Shit, wait. Was that supposed to be romantic just then?”

“ — Well.” Matsukawa clears his throat. “You tell me, I guess?”

No One Else Like You, by auber_jean

"It’s not at all liberating to finally have it said out loud, because it makes it all that more real, and Matsukawa was doing really well pretending that he wasn’t in love with his best friend."

With the turn of graduation, Matsukawa finds himself choosing between a future that he has planned or something more.

live it up, drink it in, by puny

Hanamaki's not a detective, just a wing spiker with a hangover, but he's gonna figure out who gave him all these hickeys if it damn well kills him.

Begin, by Karasuno Volleygays

It's the last day of their high school years and the first day of the rest of their lives. As they spend the night under a blanket of stars, they can't help but wonder where will they go from here?

Playing Doubles, by squidmemesinc

“We always said we were going to fuck at every possible time of day,” Takahiro says, rolling his hips gently over Issei’s.

“I do remember saying that once. Do you have the calendar on hand?”

Captured Light, by plumtrees

“The smile you’re wearing in this photo,” Hanamaki continued, just a little bit sad, “you haven’t smiled like that in a long time.”

Matsukawa looked at the photo again. It was awkward; it always was, seeing himself through Hanamaki’s lens. He’d never really focused on himself whenever he looked at the photos Hanamaki took of him, but now his eyes actively trailed over his face, the crinkle of his eyes, the twinkle in them from the light reflecting off of his cellphone, the smile wide enough to show an entire row of teeth.

He tried to emulate the expression, only to realize how foreign it felt on his face.

-

A love story like most love stories, stuck between busy days and too little time spent together.

Matsukawa learns to take it easy, and Hanamaki is his teacher.

Marks, by Andramion

The room is quiet when Issei gathers the pillows under his arms and lies down. He presses his nose into his shoulder, closes his eyes and focusses on the barely-there touch of fingertips to his skin.

Hanamaki always does this, every single time.

Sure, by kiyala

Beginning university brings a lot of changes with it. As Iwaizumi and Oikawa deal with going to different universities, Hanamaki thinks about his own relationship with Matsukawa.

nebulas, by tothemoon

“You'll have to let me think about it,” Hanamaki says to him while they're looking at soup stocks in the supermarket one evening, because he knows being with someone is not as simple as he'd like it to be.

(At this, Matsukawa does not fret. He goes for the snack aisle, instead.)

Settled, by kiyala

Hanamaki and Matsukawa go for a walk in their hometown in the middle of the night, and reflect on the things that have changed since high school.

Staking a Claim, by iwaizumemes

"Do you think they can tell?"

"Tell what?"

"That we've fucked in all their bedrooms."

something of a disaster, by latenights

“This is the part where you make a wish and blow.”

“Now, let’s not get too hasty—“

“I meant the candles you bastard.”

that’s you get (for waking up in vegas), by skittidyne

“There was an Elvis?” Hajime asks.

“He was the officiator. It’s the cliché, right?”

“…Officiator of what?” Tooru asks with a look down at Takahiro’s hand.

“You can borrow my phone to pull pictures from for our wedding album.” Issei reaches over and grasps the hand with the ring on it. Everyone is staring at their clasped hands like a three-headed lobster just crawled onto the table. “You were both the best men and I was very, deeply touched by how affected you both were at the ceremony,” he says in a perfect deadpan.

(( or: iwaizumi does not want to be the responsible one, and thus they suffer the consequences, or, perhaps, 'suffer' is a bit too strong of a word ))

Wilds, by AngryKitten

Makki waded back to him, two handfuls of stones dripping lake-water. He was grinning, like he always did, like their lives were one great joke that Matsukawa only occasionally understood. Hanamaki tipped his hand, and the rocks tumbled out into the bottom of their canoe.

“For later,” Hanamaki said.

Parting Words, by kiyala

Matsukawa confesses his feelings for Hanamaki at graduation, knowing that they're unrequited. Hanamaki's not so sure about that.

we could be the greatest team, by anyadisee

Oikawa mock-gasps. “Makki! You should know that I was genuinely planning on talking about strategy! I just thought it would be polite to wait for Iwa-chan and Mattsun to get back. But since you brought the topic up”—Hanamaki opens his mouth to protest, but is ignored—“have I told you how amazing Iwa-chan is? Like, he’s just the best boyfriend ever.”

“Wow, I never would’ve guessed what with, you know, how much you’ve been talking about it,” Hanamaki deadpans.

Oikawa waves a hand airily. “Don’t be jealous that my boyfriend is so sweet and romantic.”

Now it’s Hanamaki’s turn to raise eyebrows. “Excuse me, but did you just indirectly drag Issei?"

[in which hanamaki and oikawa get competitive, matsukawa and iwaizumi are good boyfriends, and the rest of seijoh somehow get involved.]

chocolate, by tellalie

“We have to do something,” Mattsun says.

Tides That Bind, by rubyfiamma

Matsuhana Fluff via prompt #19. Things you said when we were the happiest we ever were.

Room to Talk, by holdontoyourhulahoops

In which one snarky comment from Yahaba makes Hanamaki realize he's been a dirty hypocrite all this time.

The Best/Worst Places to Cry in the City, by AngryKitten

“Okay this is going to sound weird, and I get it if you want to say no, but I know a good place to cry and it’s only like a block from here. If you need to, um, let that out or something.”

Matsukawa gets hit on while crying in public and it might be the worst thing that has ever happened to him. Or it might be the best.

plus one, by orphan_account

"Did you know we're dating?"

"What? Says who?"

"Says everyone apparently."

"Oh," Hanamaki frowns for a few seconds before shrugging and turning his attention back to the chocolate fountain. "Nice."

Making Sense, by kiyala

Sharing an apartment does very little to help Hanamaki deal with his feelings for Matsukawa. Perhaps that's not such a bad thing.

and indeed there will be time, by plumtrees

Between volleyball and the looming end of their high school years, Hanamaki thinks he’s already dealing with more than enough, thank you very much.

Unfortunately, no one else gets the memo.

-

Alternatively: “I am not in love with my best friend!” says Hanamaki Takahiro. Nobody buys his bullshit.

snakes, meth labs and something like love, by orphan_account

"Did you know snakes can give birth to between ten and 150 babies at any one time?"

Matsukawa tenses. "And how many have you, um— How many have you found?"

"Four," Hanamaki sighs, voice shaking slightly with what sounds like pure, unadulterated defeat. "So far."

Flamingo, by JanaRumpandRCJawnn

Summary by me: series with Trans!Makki, dealing with transphobia, and a nice lovely characterization of Ushijima.

it’s cold out there, by bishounen_curious

Seijoh's parties are always a mess, but this one takes the cake.

he’s a looker but i really think it’s guts that matter most, by respectableflourish

His fellow first year loves volleyball, has a chill factor verging on glacial, partakes in the type of verbal repartee Takahiro has only ever dreamt of finding in another person, and just so happens to exhibit an eyebrow and eyeliner game that is on another fucking level.

my heart beats for contract law, by orphan_account

"You had an emotional breakdown in a McDonalds drive-through."

"Mmm."

"And proposed to me."

"Shhh."

"In a McDonalds drive-through, Hiro."

Takahiro huffs out a nervous laugh, keeping his eyes closed. "You love it," he repeats, nuzzling closer.

services i can provide, by commovente

“So, what’s this?” Matsukawa asks. “An apology?”

Hanamaki drawls the words out, but he’s rambling. “I mean, I was actually going for a bribe, but. You know what, Mattsun? I’m nothing if not adaptable, so. Yes. Consider this an apology.”

it’s easy being with you, sacred simplicity, by earlgrey_milktea

a conversation at half past three.

poolside, by tothemoon

At eighteen, it'd been a matter of wading.

At twenty-five, Hanamaki tries not to fall in headfirst.

need a little sweetness in my life, by orphan_account

The smell of freshly baked bread, watching his cakes rise, listening to customers endlessly praise his desserts? All that is great but, Matsukawa thinks as he shuffles closer to the counter to greet him, the best thing about his job is the man standing in front of him.

And he doesn’t even know his name.

Lemonade, by carriecmoney

“Seriously, after Oikawa’s Oikawaness, Iwaizumi with the shoulders and the intensity and the caring about people shit and you with…” Takahiro gestures at Matsukawa’s everything. “That. What am I?”

Sing For Me, by rideahorse

The first time he hears Matsukawa singing, it’s in the shower, post-practice, when Matsukawa is likely positive no one’s around to hear it. Takahiro doesn’t even know what to think at first; Matsukawa sings just as he talks, voice a low timbre, barely changing pitch as it navigates through some melody that is so familiar yet unreachable in Takahiro’s mind. It’s English, too, so Takahiro wouldn’t understand it anyways, but that’s beside the point.

The point is that the locker room suddenly feels ten times hotter and Takahiro feels like he might melt into a puddle of very gay and very confused sludge.

Realisations, by kiyala

In which Hanamaki realises that Matsukawa is a werewolf, and has a few other realisations while he's at it.

Magical Mishaps and How to Deal, by plumtrees

Hanamaki Takahiro loved Matsukawa Issei. Sometimes. Mostly. When he wasn’t being bull-headed or overly-difficult. Which wasn’t a lot of the time now that Hanamaki thought about it. Shit. But he digressed.

Demon-mating was a for life kind of deal. Certainly not a decision one could make out of the blue, without years of prior thought and much meditation. The day he asked for his mother’s blessing, the day he planned to ask Matsukawa to be his mate, she had told him If you’re sure you’ll be happy with him, then all I hope for is that he says yes and by some miracle he did and here they are now and Hanamaki could say with all the certainty in the world that he loved Matsukawa Issei with all his heart and soul(s).

But some days…dear gods, some days…some days he just made it really, really difficult.

-

Or: Matsukawa accidentally turns Kindaichi and Kunimi into babies and guess who has to help him clean up his fucking mess.

Pink and Yellow, by hotcocoa

Hanamaki is beautiful, Matsukawa is supportive, and both of them are the luckiest boyfriends in the world.

hang out fall in love, by carafin

In which Hanamaki's humble medical practice is threatened by an intractable asshole a witch doctor who's just moved into the shop down the street. Medical/Witchcraft AU.

-

As far as Hanamaki’s concerned, and as far as bad life decisions go, setting up your witch clinic right next to an actual, proper, medical clinic is practically akin to setting up an all-you-can-eat buffet right next to a gym. Or a sex toy shop next to a church. Or a vegetable patch next to a goat farm. Or – yeah, the point is, this Matsukawa guy has totally cornered the market in Terrible-Life-Decision-Making-Skills.

Baby It’s Cold Outside, by dancingwithwings

Matsukawa looks round. And – heaven help him – he’s greeted with the guy from a couple of apartments down, the guy who dyes his hair to look like a strawberry for reasons unbeknownst, looking so disgruntled, so bedraggled, so akin to a drowning cat, that it almost makes him laugh out loud. The guy is barefoot, wearing only a towel. And the look on his face might turn Matsukawa to stone.

In which the fire alarm goes off, Hanamaki is in a towel, and Mattsun just really needs to study.

Zenith, Nadir, by tookumade

A former god realises that it's time to say goodbye.

Parallel Lines, by orphan_account

Yesterday night, Matsukawa had told his parents that he was joining math club, which lead to several confused smiles from them as they tried to figure out his change of heart.

“Didn’t you say you were allergic to competitive math?” His mom had asked. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, we’re very supportive of your decision, but-”

Fortunately, or maybe unfortunately, they’d let it go because no sane parent prevents their child from joining math team, which is intellectually beneficial and looks very nice on college applications. This, in turn, prevents Matsukawa from having to explain that he’s joining- dear god- because of a crush.

this isn’t exactly how i thought i’d spend my adult years, by jadedpearl

When Hanamaki coughs–hacks–the guy, who's been near comatose this entire time, opens his eyes and looks over a little, seemingly with the least amount of effort possible. "Bless you," he says, but his eyes are still sleepy. Hanamaki turns his head and stares at him. "I didn't sneeze." The guy looks a bit surprised. "What?" "I coughed." "So?" "Who the fuck says bless you when someone coughs?"

The Courage of Stars, by FairyLights101

It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

Then again, not many things were.

sugar pink liquor, liquor lips, by h_lovely

His lips still taste like sugar and liquor; they’re rosy and plush as they fit softly against Matsukawa’s own.

What would you do (if I told you that I la, la, la, loved you?), by Frenchibi

5 IwaOi moments as seen by Hanamaki and Matsukawa ... +1 moment of revenge :'D

Shoulda Known, by fxvixen

He quickly composes his face to look concerned. “What’s the matter there, sport?”

The groan cuts off.

Hanamaki lifts his head, a few strands of hair flopping onto his forehead. He narrows his eyes at Matsukawa’s attempt of a poker face. “Never call me that again.”

~or~

matsuhana feels and cuddles

Time and Distance, by kiyala

Matsukawa is attending university in Kyoto. Hanamaki comes to visit.

Kaleidoscope, by tookumade

Fall in love in five cities.

press play, by airblends

“Makki, you want in on our intro?” Oikawa gestures with his hand.

“Nah, I already promised Issei we’d do one for his channel. There are only so many intros a man can film in a day.”

“Issei, huh?” Oikawa’s lips settle into a knowing smirk. Iwaizumi coughs into his fist, gently prying the camera from Oikawa’s hands to turn it off.

Hanamaki’s face burns up, his cheeks a fiery red. “We’re just friends,” he says, the phrase rolling off his tongue by sheer reflex. He has lost count of how many times he’s typed it into the comment section beneath his videos. At this point he might just start to believe it himself.

New Ground, by kiyala

About new cities and new relationships.

Trusting Things Beyond Mistake, by twinkrevali

"‘I–’ Hanamaki starts, then stops, turning to face the lake and frowning as the words fail to reach him.

Matsukawa pushes himself up to look at Hanamaki properly, hands resting in his lap.

‘You,’ he prompts, and Hanamaki looks at him, eyes shining.

This must be, he thinks, what they call a moment of clarity."

Would You Rather, by jadedpearl

“Y’know,” Hanamaki says, stretching his arms above his head, “I don’t even get why Oikawa is the popular one. If this was an anime, I’d be the main character.”

The setting sun burns his edges gold, alights the sharp planes of his face. Matsukawa looks away, faces forward, towards the houses that wind out of sight.

“What makes you say that?” he replies easily, because things have always been just that, with Hanamaki.

too scared to say (that i want you), by urieskooki

"How could he not hate me if he knew?"

Falling in love with your best friend sucks.

one-way ticket, by noyabeans

post-chapter 258.

-

in an alternate universe, they would be the ones on that screen, feet solidly planted on the smooth ground of the tokyo gym and the smell of air salonpas around them.

take my hand, take my whole life, too, by earlgrey_milktea

matsukawa and hanamaki, a few years down the road, and years to go, together.

all our stolen moments (i’d spend forever with you), by earlgrey_milktea

quiet moments between matsukawa and hanamaki.

it's all worth it, in the end.

Switched Jerseys, by chromyrose

After practice on an afternoon shortly before the Spring High tournament begins, they’re the last two people changing in the club room. The weather is starting to turn for the colder, and Hanamaki sighs when the cool air touches his heated skin after he takes his jersey off. He feels a warm hand on his back, and looks over his shoulder...

oh we’re fading fast / i miss missing you now and then, by earlgrey_milktea

It’s strange, missing someone. You find them in every thing you do, and you think you want them back, but you don’t. Not really. Not now, not like this.

-

issei and the quiet that hanamaki left behind.

i thought i could tame these memories to keep me company like a housecat, by earlgrey_milktea

So he stayed here, in a house that hasn’t been a home in a long time, with a cat that keeps looking out the window as if waiting for someone that isn’t coming home.

-

takahiro and the empty house and lonely cat that issei left behind.

those days are dead and gone (but we’re still here), by kythen

They're graduating today and Hanamaki doesn't want to get out of bed.

stranger things, by tinypersonhotel

In 2012, the men’s national volleyball team took home the bronze at the Asian Cup. Tokyo Skytree opened to the public. Also, the dashing Hanamaki Takahiro and painfully cool Matsukawa Issei started a radio show out of Aoba Johsai’s abandoned A/V room and accidentally became the two most popular guys in school.

Daily Password: [ ], by tookumade

“Neko Atsume?” Hanamaki says sleepily when he recognises the song coming from his phone. He opens his eyes with a mystified smile. “You’re still playing?”

-

(written for Haikyuu!! MatsuHana Week - Day 1 - music)

tell them i love you, by tookumade

“Are you two serious about it, though?” Oikawa says dubiously after training when they’re leaving the clubroom together. “Could you seriously tell each other ‘I love you’?”

“Of course we’re serious!” protests Matsukawa at the same time Hanamaki says, “Of course we can!”

-

(written for Haikyuu!! MatsuHana Week - Day 3 - romantic gesture)

like a river, by astersandstuffs

“Is that a confession? Are you actually confessing to me right now?”

“Hm. Yeah.”

-

Or, they still have a lot to learn (and maybe that's the thing about being together).

Baby(sitting), Maybe, by tookumade

“One day,” says Hanamaki, “we’ll look back on this and laugh.”

“Mm-hm,” Matsukawa hums.

“It’ll be a cute little story. We’ll tell our friends, and they’ll laugh along with us. They might even be sympathetic.”

“Mmmm…”

“You’re absolutely right, sympathetic is reaching way too far.”

-

(written for Haikyuu!! MatsuHana Week - Day 6 - children, bonds)

Matsuhana Week 2017, by h_lovely

Day 1: music//relationship goals Day 2: competition//petty Day 3: romantic gesture//fairy tale Day 4: in danger//leaving home Day 5: food//science Day 6: children//bonds Day 7: on video//surprises

A God for Every Season, by timkons

Mortals have all kinds of foolish tales, like how Hades and Persephone's annual reunion causes the seasons. Matsukawa knows better.

Habenaria Radiata, by tookumade

Hanamaki turns onto his side so that they’re facing each other, and his smile is warm; Matsukawa feels his heart skip a beat, as it always does whenever this happens, and he wonders when he’ll ever get used to it, when it’ll become normal enough that he doesn’t get butterflies in his stomach every time Hanamaki smiles at him.

(Probably never, if he’s being honest with himself. He is content with this.)

take my heart and put it in your pocket, by Frenchibi

Issei blinks. “I ain’t drinkin’ any of your froofy Christmas Latte thingies.” “Orange Caramel Mocha.” “What?” “Vanilla Chai Latte.” “Ew.” “Cinnamon Hot Chocolate.” Issei rolls his eyes, resigned. “Fine. That doesn’t sound too awful.”

Remind Me, by tookumade

For Hanamaki and Matsukawa, their first meeting consists of a small accident, a terrible first impression, and the start of something new—maybe something better.

(In which they learn to keep trying, and to try again.)

like twinkling lights and the warmth of your hand, by earlgrey_milktea

mattsun and makki go on an impromptu date.

in a daze, by wyverning

The sound of a camera shutter goes off, and Issei lazily cracks open an eye to see Hanamaki grinning down at him, phone held loosely in one hand.

“That was the best Kunimi impression I’ve ever seen,” he says by way of explanation.

Clueless, by Elleh

If anyone had asked Issei how he’d thought his night would end, he’d have never said: catching my best friend moaning my name while fucking himself.

There’s an odd second, between Issei entering their room and sliding the door of the bedroom open, in which Issei is still oblivious. Skin prickling, a sudden dryness in his mouth, but oblivious. He’s taking his shoes off when the first moan catches him.

He stills right on the spot, a shoe hanging from his finger, the other hand half-way to opening the bedroom. Issei swallows, images of Hanamaki with a girl from the hotel, that’s why he didn’t want to come with us drink, the bitter taste that realisation leaves behind. Issei shouldn’t care Hanamaki’s having sex with someone, but the sourness turns into rage—and maybe disappointment. He’s gonna have a serious conversation about boundaries and, you know, could you let me know in advance, so I find—

“Issei… Mmmh, fuck.”

IOU, by Karasuno Volleygays

Matsukawa Issei goes in for a tattoo and ends up with an interesting new friend in Hanamaki Takahiro. Soon his visits to his tattoo artist's studio in the back of a restaurant become a highlight of his days, and that's before feelings start to wriggle their way into the picture.

take a screenshot, it’ll last longer, by h_lovely

It’s all fun and games until someone pops a boner in a staff meeting.

lapsus linguae, by astersandstuffs

“I’m literally your best friend,” Matsukawa says.

Takahiro pauses. “Shit. You’re right.”

Reflex, by hiuythn

Nobody likes to talk about how Hanamaki and Matsukawa met, which is a shame, because they both think it's the funniest fucking thing to ever happen to either of them.

my way home, by tookumade

Matsukawa has been sitting at their freshly-placed dining table and staring at his copy of their new apartment keys for at least an hour.

(Hanamaki checks his watch. Okay, five minutes; same thing.)

first light, by tookumade

Iwaizumi and Oikawa immediately break out into booing and gagging noises, because as much as they both think themselves mature and reasonable people, they are honestly idiots. Matsukawa just grins and takes a sip of his own beer, pleased, but Hanamaki is frozen, eyes wide and a blush creeping across his face in a way that had nothing to do with the beer.

Tactical Retreat, by Karasuno Volleygays

After years of getting their asses handed to them by the seemingly psychic Iwaoi bond, Issei and Takahiro opt to spend the rest of their paintballing trip engaged in other activities.

Mirror Flower, Water Moon, by h_lovely

Matsukawa’s gaze lingers on Hanamaki. He’s talking about something, ranting on and Matsukawa isn’t sure about what at this point. He should be listening really, how rude of him. But spring has just sprung and the little pink petals dotting the sidewalk match so pleasantly with the strawberry shade of Hanamaki’s short-clipped hair.

(Or, a study on timing and how to get it right.)

quidditch gloves, parchment, and custard cream, by h_lovely

After class, Matsukawa finds Hanamaki in the tall cushy grass by the lake.

[thetruthisinthetooth]

Jeff x Annie WIP - SneakPeek

So some time ago I found a fic I wrote for Jeff x Annie. It's not finished yet and I need to finish writing some fics for other fandoms but my need to write these two again is getting stronger and stronger.

Here you have a completely unbetad sneak peek... Enjoy!

[READ MORE]

He poured two glasses of whiskey, smirking he gave it to her. They'd won a huge case for the firm, so they were celebrating.

He sat next to her, as he gazed at her smiling with his eyes that way he only knows how to and drank in silence. He was staring at her not realizing it; she, on the other hand, was staring at space deep in her thoughts so she didn't realize he was staring at her or maybe she did but she was so used to it that she'd found a way to live with it, not that she minded.

Jeff kept gazing at her, he couldn't believe that was Annie, his Annie. She grew up to be a great beautiful woman in and out. After her internship in the FBI, she realized that she wanted more, that investigating left her with unresolved cases, she felt that she wasn't the one putting the bad guys to jail even though she helped. So after debating long with him, she had decided to become a lawyer. She started an internship in a law firm as soon as she could and soon Jeff was following her lead. Teaching just wasn't for him, even though he tried. Well, half-tried.

He really let her go and he couldn't be prouder of her. They went back to old habits fast after she came back from the internship and although there had been a kiss or two after that, there was always one of them that said it was a mistake and that was that, after a little bit of awkwardness things went back to normal: stolen glances and friendship. They loved working together and hanging out but at the end of the day so much time had passed that maybe there was no point in doing something that might ruin their friendship. They were so important to each other that they couldn't even think of losing one another and for what? A relationship that might have ended up hurting each other, no thanks.

Of course all of this was never really spoken between them because that was what they did, they'd talk about everything but about them and the Annie of it all not so much.

- "Wanna grab some dinner?" He suddenly said, breaking the silence

- "Oh, I can't!" She frowned. "I'm sorry I didn't know you wanted to go out! I made plans already" - she said apologetic

- "With Mcdouche?" He said in a plain voice not trying to show how much he hated the guy

- "Yeah with him! Stop calling him like that!" She said as she swatted his arm.

-"What? Mcdouche? But if it goes so well with his face and his stupid hair"

Annie squinted her eyes at him between amused and angry. And suddenly a spark appeared in her eye as a realization came upon her

-"Wait! Have you been watching my Grey's Anatomy DVDs I left in your house?"

-"Whaat? No! I don't watch that crap. It's for girls and men that clearly are gay," he answers in a strangely high voice and big eyes which avoid her inquiring gaze.

-"Ok, fine, fine! - she said standing up, her hands up in mock surrender. As she headed for the door, she turned around and said: "By the way, Mcsteamy has better hair than you"

- "No, he doesn't!!! I have 10 times the hair and body than that cheating bastard." At that moment he closed his eyes, realizing he let her know he perfectly knew who Mcsteamy was. Damn him, damn her!

-"Night Jeff! Have fun at Seattle Grace" - she said as a snort came out trying to control her laughter.

- "I don't watch that crappy show!" He shouted back to her.

- "You doooo!" She shouted singing as she left.

-"I don't" he said almost whispering and pouting as he got ready to go home. His cell caught his attention while it vibrates on his desk:

Annie: you do! ;)

Damn her, he thought smiling.

[5hfanfiction]

Into Her Anatomy

Chapter One: Code Blue

White. How plain the white walls were that outlined the quiet hallways of the hospital with only a handful of abstract paintings and health guides posted on it. Other than that everything else around was lifeless and so quiet. It was, as a matter of fact, still too early for the day to start with the sun barely making its debut on the horizon. The buzz of the dim fluorescent above gives the hallway a more eerie feeling. Then there was the smell, the antiseptic smell that clung onto the air. For some people the hospital was a scary place to be. It’s a place of sickness, of blood, of choked up screams and of death.

For some people, yes, it was a living nightmare to be in a hospital but not for the little doctor whose dreams carved the dull hallways and sterile smell of the building. The nightmare for some was Camila’s lifelong dream.

Camila Cabello was a medical intern at South Trinity General Hospital. The internship program had very limited vacancies giving only a hundred slots to freshly licensed physicians meaning doctors without actual professional experience yet. All chosen hundred interns who did make the cut will undergo a series of assessments and training.

During the program each doctor will be assigned to a spectrum of clinical cases from a simple fever to broken bones and even brain surgery. Any intern who breaks any hospital regulations or make any detrimental mistakes will be kicked out of the program. By the end of the internship, the remaining physicians will be able to choose a field of their liking and may finally work as a resident doctor at South Trinity. It is, after all, the top hospital in the state.

It’s only been a week since Camila started in South Trinity. She was currently walking the hallway pushing along a wheelchair in which Mrs York was sitting. She was Camila’s first patient. Mrs York had kidney transplant a few days ago and is currently undergoing a series of therapy. Camila was to evaluate her recovery and make sure she goes home well.

Both of them were on their way back to Mrs York’s room when a static sound cut through the morning quietness.

“CODE BLUE. CODE BLUE. EAST WING. ROOM 727. CODE BLUE. CODE BLUE.”

A female voice announced the emergency through the speakers that were installed above every medical station. It was necessary since the hospital was big and messages needed to be relayed as quickly as possible to the nearest, available aid. The sound of rushed footsteps can be heard bouncing along the hallways not too far from Camila’s position. Moments later the code team emerges from the corner pushing a defibrillator machine together with some vials, syringes and other emergency medical supplies on a cart. The team of four wearing navy blue scrubs made their way hastily pass Camila as she went to the side to make more room.

Getting distracted with the whole running, the young doctor hadn’t notice the distressed Mrs York who was now pulling on Camila’s right white coat sleeve pulling her body down to the patient’s level. Mrs York’s torso was angled uncomfortably towards Camila with the wheelchair restricting her movements.

“Doctor, is everything okay?” Mrs York asked in whispered panic.

Camila went around the wheelchair and knelt in front of Mrs York. She took the patient’s hands within hers and squeezed them gently, reassuring her and calming her down.

“Everything will be okay.” She answered.

“But doctor what’s happening to the patient? What is a code blue?” She inquired further but more calm now.

Camila smiled knowing that Mrs York had become more talkative and curious than before. You see, Mrs York wasn’t only a patient with a kidney problem. Despite still being in her 40s, she also suffers from early-onset Alzheimer’s disease which means she tends to forget things in a greater extent. Her memory is constantly degrading. Her disease has made her more distant and reserve from most people. She doesn’t like talking to anyone but Camila for the past week. There was something about the young doctor that made Mrs York open up. Seeing now that she’s interacting has made Camila more hopeful for her improvement and recovery.

“Code blue is a medical term we use to indicate that a patient is undergoing cardiopulmonary arrest.” Camila replied but the patient’s brows corrugate even more out of confusion. Camila elaborated further.

“It’s when a person doesn’t show any signs of breathing and his or her heart has stopped from beating. It ceases to function completely. The code team will try to resuscitate the person back using the machine that they were wheeling in earlier.” Camila pointed towards the room and the wide-eyed Mrs York finally nodded in understanding.

“Does that mean that the person is dead?” Mrs York stared directly at the door. She had a calculating look on her face, as if analyzing the whole situation in her head.

“Technically, yes, but the code team will try to jolt the patient back to life and do whatever it takes to save the patient’s life.” Camila reassured her and Mrs York seems to be pleased with the answer. She looked back towards the direction of her room that was a few doors away while Camila straightened up and continued pushing her wheelchair until they finally reached Mrs York’s room.

The short walk made Camila think of the countless of unexpected circumstances that can happen in the hospital. It can either bring people good memories or bad ones. Camila, of course, was there for the good ones even though unlikely things can and will happen. She was mentally crossing her fingers for a great and steady internship also praying that she doesn’t turn into big dummy when dire situations arise.

Camila wheeled the patient in and assisted her to lie back on her bed carefully. “Get some more rest, okay?” She raised both brows waiting for her answer.

“Yes, doctor. Thank you for everything.” She took Camila’s hands within hers and patted them. “I will do as ordered.” Camila smiled and turned around to make her way towards the door when it suddenly opened. A man in a black suit and a tall brunette peering just behind him entered quietly. In that moment, Mrs York had managed to pull again the white coat sleeve of the young doctor, getting her attention. She then whispered quietly towards Camila but it wasn’t soft enough because Camila could see the man from her peripheral vision flinch at the question.

“Doctor Cabello? Who are these people?” The young doctor immediately looked at the man’s rigid posture but he only nodded at her and gave her a sad smile.

“Mrs York.” Camila started. “"That man over there is your son David and that is his wife Rosa.” She cleared her throat and subconsciously picked at the loose skin near her thumb. A mannerism she seems to have when she feels uneasy. Giving sad news like this to a patient was never Camila’s strength. It makes her feel a lot of emotions that her tiny body is trying to conceal. She wants to be able to help every patient but some cases are just too extensive that treatment becomes difficult. “They were here just yesterday.” The young doctor added.

Mrs York’s face changed from confusion to sudden realization then finally a mixture of horror and sorrow. They all stood silently until David broke the awkwardness that was starting to engulf them.

“We’ll take it from here, Doctor. Thank you very much for everything.” David sighed forlornly.

Camila knew that this has been a normal occurrence in the family lately. She gave them a smile and made her way out of the room to give the family some needed privacy.

Camila made her way back to the medical station to finish a few patient records when her phone rang inside her white coat pocket. Fishing it out, the screen displayed Dinah Jane in bold letters. She lets out a giggle and cleared her throat swiping the screen to answer.

“How can I be of service, Doctor Hansen?” Camila said in a serious tone trying to act all maturely now that she has a title to uphold. She continued walking towards the station with her other hand inside her scrub suit.

Dinah scoffs at the other end of the call making Camila pout at her failed attempt to sound professional around her best friend. “Where have you and your sexy ass been, Mila? I haven’t seen you all week since we started.” She said loudly through the receiver and yawning afterwards.

Doctor Dinah Jane Hansen was a fellow intern. They met in medical school after Dinah was caught carrying a scalpel during their first week saying she was so ready to cut something. It was total chaos because people thought she was crazy. A crowd already started to form around Dinah but far enough from her reach.

Camila was just passing by when the whole incident happen. She made her way through the thick crowd and saw a tall woman with long blonde hair brandishing the sharp apparatus at people. She walked slowly behind the crazy woman then in one quick motion she lounged at her. Left arm encircling Dinah’s neck and her right hand gripping tightly around the wrist that connected to the hand with the scalpel. Both of Camila’s legs were wrapped around Dinah’s waist from the back. With that sneak attack from behind Dinah completely lost her balance and dropped the scalpel on the floor. Camila was already down in a second and kicked the blade away from anyone’s reach. She internally thanked her father for teaching her self-defense when she was still in grade school until high school.

She now raised her hands toward the furious woman. Palms forward, motioning for the tall girl to stop whatever the heck she was attempting to do.

Her actions earned Camila a death glare that made her regret taking the weapon away from the woman. She knew she could defend herself but to what extent. The woman was huge compared to her tiny frame. But what left Camila even more confused was that a few moments after Dinah sent knives with her eyes, the woman was already laughing hysterically, bending forward crossing her arms around her abdomen and was literally laughing out loud. Oh she was crazy alright.

No one as tiny as Camila had the balls to go against Dinah’s interests and that made her laughed and nod in approval. After the whole commotion was arranged the bell rang, signalling their noon break. They had lunch together. Camila didn’t have a choice but to follow since she was already being pulled by the taller girl. Turns out Dinah didn’t really have the intention of harming anyone. She only wanted to dissect a specimen which was impossible because they were in their first semester and were stuck in lecture halls for the first few months. Since then they found so many things in common and been at each other backs, except know Camila wasn’t koala hugging Dinah from behind; Just… there to look out for each other.

Camila was laughing now at Dinah’s usual morning banter and the memory of how they fortunately or unfortunately met. “Good morning to you too, doctor. If you must know my ass and I have been busy working the night shift the whole week.” She replied then checked the time on her wrist watch. “I’ll be off by seven AM then its hello weekend for me.”

“Okay, so are you down for tomorrow? Celebrate a great first week and just relax.” Camila could sense a huge smirk from Dinah.

“By relax you mean?”

“Partying Mils.” Dinah answered quickly with a hint of duh in her voice.

“I can’t. M…”

“God. Did your life become more duller than when we were in med school or is it because you haven’t been having a little fun in bed for a while that made you this sour? Come on Mils.” Camila rolled her eyes at Dinah’s assumption that she isn’t having any type fun.

“For your information…”

“Na uh, watching Netflix and eating ice cream isn’t what I meant when I said fun in bed. You know what fun I’m referring to Mila.” She interjected quickly not making Camila finish her sentence again but she was right. Camila hasn’t been in a relationship for a very long time that she’s starting to forget how it felt to be touched, kissed, loved and all other things you do in a relationship. Dinah has been pushing her to get a little something-something for a while which she found unnecessary because she was happy on her own. Or maybe she hasn’t really been paying attention to people because of how busy she has become.

“If you would just listen for a sec then you would know why I can’t go. My mom and Sofi are coming to visit me for the weekend to check my place and shut up because Netflix and ice cream are a great combination.” She said in her defense resting half of her upper body on the counter at the station as she arrives.

“Mhmm.” Dinah said and Camila could just imagine her face with a raised brow and pointed look.

“I promise you next weekend. We can go wherever you want.” She was wiggling her brows and smirking even though Dinah couldn’t see it.

“You better not make plans next weekend. You’re all mine or else kiss your sorry ass good bye.”

“Yes, Doctor Hansen. I’m all yours next weekend. I got to go finish up now. I still need to report back to the Chief. Bye Dinah, love you.” Camila answered happily. Both of them have been very busy with the orientation and the number of patients thrown at them for supervision. Not that she was complaining. She loves doing her work. She loves helping people. It’s just that she missed her crazy best friend and their crazy adventures together.

“See you around, Doctor Cabello. Buh-bye. Love you too.”

After her shift ended, Camila went into the locker room to change and grab a few things before she goes home. A few other interns were already done changing and were now on their way out the locker room. She hangs up her white coat inside her locker and reached towards it to trace with her right thumb the South Trinity logo that was stitched in blue.

“You made it, Camila.” She uttered quietly to herself when she was finally alone. “You’re finally living your dream.” She smiled and proceeded to strip off her scrubs, folding them and shoving it inside her green duffel bag. She soon dressed herself in a pair of high-waist pants and white V-neck shirt exposing a considerable amount of skin but not too much. She then removed her black hair tie letting the thick wavy hair fall onto her shoulders, keeping the black band securely on her left wrist. Camila locked her locker and slung her duffel bag across her torso and went straight into the employees lounge room to refill her go-to-coffee mug with some hot, aromatic espresso. This has been her morning ritual for the past week after she had discovered the expensive coffee brewer in the lounge room.

She took the warm mug between her palms and went into the elevator going down a couple of floors onto the lobby. The morning sunshine was perfectly warming Camila’s skin through the ceiling to floor glass of the lobby.

There’s really nothing like ending your work shift with warmth surrounding you and a delicious cup of coffee. She thought.

She went near a biometric machine and clocked out using her fingerprint.

Camila was excited to go home. She was excited to start her weekend. She was excited to tell her mom and Sofi everything that happened since she started. It has been a very eventful week and she couldn’t wait to share her stories.

She made her way across the wide lobby towards the double, automated doors whilst taking the lid off her mug to smell the relaxing aroma of her freshly brewed, hot espresso. She moaned internally, closing her eyes in the process and just enjoyed the moment. When she opened her eyes a flash of black caught her vision and knocked her coffee causing the content to spill all over her. Did I mention it was hot because, yes, the mug was filled with Satan’s scalding lava and the said lava was practically burning the skin off of Camila.

She stumbled a few steps back and cursed a few, maybe, a handful of profanities. She had already dropped her mug and immediately pulled her white shirt away from her body to ease some of the hot liquid away and also to avoid the shirt from sticking onto her body that was starting to embarrassingly outline her black bra. When Camila looked back at the black object she instead saw a woman just turning around with a fearful expression on her face. Wait. Was she walking backwards when she was entering the automated doors? The woman turned slowly until she was completely facing her and started to move towards Camila with fear still etched all over her face and hands slightly raised in apology. Yeah, she better be scared. This woman just had to ruin what was supposed to be a start of a perfect day for Camila.

“What the fuck were you doing?” Camila yelled at her.

“I-I was… It was that…” The woman wearing a grey shirt and black pants stuttered. “I w-was just…” She pointed to the door. Camila was furious. Her skin was stinging in pain, her mug seemed to be broken somewhere on the floor and this woman wasn’t really helping with the situation. She was just closing and opening her mouth trying to form a reasonable explanation.

“Next time you enter a place, walk like a normal human being.” She said harshly to the other girl. “And you should, uhm, you should watch where you’re going.” She said the last few words quietly just realizing that she too wasn’t really paying attention where she was going since she was too invested in having an orgasm from smelling her coffee. Feeling a sudden guilt from raising her voice she just assessed her situation and looked down at her chest.

Her skin was now a light shade of red. The coffee spilled from her chin to her neck down her collarbones and soaking the whole front of her shirt which she was still pulling away from her body. She lifted her other hand to touch the affected area but was stopped instantly by a hand on her wrist.

“Don’t touch it.”

The woman was now a few inches away from her that Camila could practically smell the woman’s minty breath. The stranger no longer showed signs of fear on her face but was now sporting a very stern look. Her light eyes scanning through Camila’s face, neck and down to her exposed chest area.

“Hey, pervert. What do you think you’re looking at? My eyes are up here.” The woman immediately glanced away and gulped nervously. She then slowly dropped Camila’s hand and looked back straight in her eyes.

“I’m really sorry.” The woman said sincerely in a deep voice. Camila couldn’t help but stare back feeling guilty for lashing out. It was after all an accident. None of them wanted that to happen. “I’m sorry for stupidly running into you.” The light-eyed woman continued. “I’m sorry for destroying your unicorn mug.” She pointed at it on the floor. “I’m sorry for ruining your shirt and I’m sorry for probably ruining your day but I’m not a pervert miss. I was just checking the damage I had done. Let me help you please?” The stranger leaned closer to her so she was levelling her eyes down the petite doctor’s eyes and waited patiently for Camila’s approval.

Camila opened her mouth slightly but just nodded. She was now filled with a mixture of awe and embarrassment. She was a doctor now. She should’ve handled the situation professionally. The moment she gave her approval the woman quickly took her duffel bag off of Camila’s body and flung it across hers instead. Her hand then snaked around Camila’s waist and pulled her towards the ER (Emergency Room) that was a door away from the lobby.

Once there, the stranger went straight to the station pulling Camila along with her. She instructed a couple of nurses for a bunch of medicine but they all just looked at her confused. No one seemed to move at the request. The light-eyed woman sighed trying to calm herself down from the lack of response and looked around and saw Camila’s ID tucked in her duffel bag’s pocket. She pulled it out, inspected it and presented it to the nurses. They all understood that Camila was indeed part of South Trinity and gave them the medicines that the stranger asked them to.

The stranger took the medical tray with its contents and continued pulling Camila around her waist towards an empty bed. She pulled the curtains close for privacy and turned towards Camila. She was so close that Camila could see the tiny dark flecks swimming in her light eyes. She was in a daze. So much was happening that she couldn’t process everything all at once. Maybe it was because of the quick change in the stranger’s fearful expression to an authorative demeanour that took her off guard. Maybe it was the deep, raspy voice that tickled her ears. Maybe it was her dark hair and beautiful face with moist, pink set of lips. Or maybe it was the strong arm around her waist that made Camila’s bones melt. She couldn’t pinpoint it out but Camila was in a blissful daze.

Camila felt hands on both sides of her waists and the stranger was stepping in closer. The hands gripped tighter and she let out a small gasp. What were they doing? She was pulled back from her reverie when the stranger suddenly carried her onto the bed. She could hear her heart pounding in her ears. All her senses were heightened. She almost forgot about her burn until the stranger instructed her.

“Strip your shirt off.” She looked at Camila seriously. The young doctor instead balled her fists at the hem of shirt.

“N-no. What are you trying to do?” Camila was now the stuttering mess. She was nervous. She couldn’t understand why such absurd request was making her feel uneasy and excited at the same time.

The stranger’s eyes widen in realization. “Oh no, miss. You misunderstood. I don’t mean to do you any more harm than I already did. It’s just that… It’s easier to put on the medicine instead of pulling your shirt down which might irritate your skin even more.” She rubbed the back of her neck nervously.

“O-okay. Sure.” Camila nodded slightly then look at the stranger straight in the eye. She extended her arm with her pointed finger creating a circular pattern. The woman got the signal and turned around on her heels immediately. There was a bit of shuffling on the bed and Camila cleared her throat.

When the woman looked back Camila had her shirt off her body and it was now bunched-up in front of her, hiding her chest from the stranger. By now her heartbeat was beating a thousand times per minute. This isn’t right. This was a stranger for crying out loud and Camila just willingly stripped for her. Maybe Dinah’s craziness was already rubbing on her. This was beyond insane but Camila didn’t stop the stranger, she just let the whole thing flow.

The woman was now walking towards Camila. She dropped the duffel bag on to the bed and took the medicine. She grabbed an empty container and squeezed the content of the ointment tube in it. She then mixed a couple of pinch of white powder from a packet plus a few drops of normal saline. She took a tongue depressor and stirred the medicinal concoction. It was weird for Camila because the ointment was already for the burn but the stranger added a few other more ingredients to it. As if reading Camila’s mind the woman informed her.

“It’ll heal faster and will hurt less compared to dabbing the ointment alone. A friend of mine taught me this trick.” After mixing it she dipped two of her fingers into the now white cream and raised it near Camila’s neck. Camila nodded for her to go on and gulped once more.

A sharp gasp escaped Camila’s lips when the cool cream was being spread all over the left side of her neck where most of the burn was. She closed her eyes as she revel in the feeling of comfort as the pain was being wiped away by soft, careful fingers. She subtly bit her lower lip when the woman’s fingers proceeded to massage the sensitive area around her pulse point. The gripped Camila had on her shirt tightened even more and she tilted her head to the other side to give better access for those magical fingers.

Camila swallowed hard when she felt soft massaging tracing her left collarbone. She slowly opened her eyes when the stranger pulled away to get more cream. Camila was already missing the smooth sensations that send her senses to overdrive. She took a closer look at the woman while she focused in the cream in the small container.

The woman had her brows knitted together in concentration. Her bottom lip trapped between her teeth then her tongue stuck out to wet her lip all the while Camila had subconsciously followed the stranger’s movements, bite then lick. When the woman looked up and met Camila’s gaze, it was then that the young doctor knew she had a certain attraction for the stranger. It was definitely the stare that gave it away.

The woman broke the eye contact first and dabbed more cream onto the heated skin. After a few moments of light caressing, massaging the stranger slowly and torturously pulled down Camila’s left bra strap to the side. Her breath hitched in her throat and closed her eyes. She was enjoying this although she would never admit it to herself, she was. When the hand that was spreading the cream traveled downwards onto Camila’s top breast mound she instantly sat up straight.

“I think I can manage from here.” Camila managed to say with her shaky voice and looked at the woman directly at her face that was mere inches away from her own. The stranger’s eyes were now darker than before, the tiny flecks gone and was now drowning in the dilated darkness but Camila looked away before things get out of hand. The woman took a step back and again rubbed the back of her neck.

“I’m really sorry, miss.” She closed the container and handed it to Camila. “Apply this every eight hours and it’ll be better in no time. Again, I’m really sorry.” With that she shoved the container inside Camila’s sweaty hands and took off closing back the curtains as she left.

When the beautiful stranger was gone, Camila was left speechless, still topless on the bed with her feet dangling not reaching the tiled floor below. She combed her wavy hair back with her fingers and collapsed on the bed. What was she feeling? It was different. A good kind of different and it was exciting. She smiled to herself then placed both her hands with the container still in her grasps on her naked chest. She can’t feel her heart anymore. She couldn’t hear her breathing. It’s as if the world stopped revolving around her as she lay on that bed.

“Code Blue.” She whispered very softly to herself. Her heart was gone and she couldn’t breathe properly all because of a certain light-eyed stranger with soothing caresses and stares that could make her squirm in delight.

“You got yourself a Code Blue, Camila.” She blushed profusely as warmth filled her cheeks and she smiled like an idiot while she hides her face in her arms.

…

A/N

This is my first camren fic. Sooo… let me know what you think. :)

[angryhausfrau-writes]

You Can’t Cross the Same River Twice - Chapter 10

It's almost the end of November by the time Hawkeye goes up to visit his dad again. He didn't mean to take so long, but things have gotten very busy at the clinic lately. Apparently, being on the board of trustees for a not insignificant endowment is a lot of work. Hawkeye's never been particularly inclined towards administration - and his grasp of financials is a bit rusty after three years in Korea where he had no real expenses but booze and gambling. And Father Mulcahy's orphans fund - but those contributions were usually made at the poker table anyway.

But the clinic is important. He and Letta - goddess of poetic justice and practicality that she is - can do a lot of good for a lot of people with this money. So he'd buckled down and signed endless reams of legal documents that Charles hadn't even really tried to screw them over on. And that alone says something about how much he'd changed over the years in Korea because Hampton and Smythe gape incredulously at any tiny show of human decency in the man.

Finally, finally, the last document is signed - they'd framed and hung the original napkin in the clinic staff room - and Hawkeye can go back to spending his evenings and weekends at home instead of at banks and lawyers' offices. And he can take a weekend to go visit his dad.

Trapper and the girls are coming too, which has Hawkeye feeling both excited and anxious. All his family will be together in one place. He wants them to all like one another so badly it's eating him up at night. He doesn't sleep much that whole week.

But when the girls show up Friday night - all huge grins and excited speculation about the exotic wonders of northern Maine and whether they'd get to go to the beach - Hawkeye relaxes. Judging by the amount of planning and preparation Louise and Trapper have put into this endeavor, they would stand a fair chance on an expedition to the moon. Hell, he and Trapper have been through an entire war that had less well thought out logistics. Hawkeye votes Louise gets put in charge of the next one as it will insure all combatants have plenty of wool socks and know how to share their toys.

In all honesty, Hawkeye thought he might feel jealous watching Trapper and Louise interact. Or feel awkward interacting with her himself. He is the other woman after all, even if Louise doesn't know. But she and Trapper seem to have fallen into an amicable enough relationship post-divorce - even if it's centered around Cathy and Becky. And she chats politely enough with Hawkeye. Though the conversation doubles as an interrogation of him, his father, Crabapple Cove, and the entire state of Maine. But she does leave the kids with them, so he must not have made too bad of an impression.

--

It's nice to see Hawkeye's dad again - and under better circumstances than his last visit. Daniel Pierce seems equally glad to see Trapper - which is a little bit of a surprise given that Hawkeye said he knows about the two of them - and he welcomes Trapper with a warm handshake. Cathy and Becky get handshakes as well and they manage to stay still through the social niceties but it's not long before they tear off to go look at and ask about a million little things around the Pierce homestead. Daniel takes it is stride - and Trapper can see how Hawkeye grew up into the curious, passionate, slightly wild man he became - just laughing and saying he'll keep the girls out of trouble while Trapper and Hawkeye get the luggage stowed away. And that's a distinct benefit of Daniel being in the know - he and Hawk are sharing the guest room rather than one of them being forced to take the couch to preserve some kinda facade of propriety or masculinity or distaste at the idea of sleeping - even platonically - with another man.

That's something Trapper had appreciated about Korea. Everyone was so cold and tired and scared and worried and homesick that they all kinda clung to one another. You could be more physically close with people cuz they all needed that reassurance that there was another warm, breathing, alive person right there with them. It's probably why he and Hawk got away with so much. They weren't always exactly subtle but people were willing to write it off as just a close friendship - just them clinging together to stay sane, same as lots of people did.

And Trapper's always been a touchy-feely kinda guy, surprising as that might be to some people. He grew up in a big family in a crowded apartment building full of other big families. Kids in the neighborhood were always roughhousing together or sitting all crammed together to read a comic book or sleeping in a bed with two brothers and a cousin cuz that's all the room there was when family came to visit. And then Trapper started playing sports and that closeness continued into the locker rooms and team practices. Hell, that was the whole reason he'd started boxing again. That physical intimacy - even if it wasn't inherently sexual - was something he needed.

That's not to say there hadn't been physical intimacy of a sexual nature. Trapper grew up close enough to the South End to run into that kinda thing. And some of the guys on the football team or in the boxing club had been that way too. As had a guy he'd taken anatomy with - and boy had they had a lot of extra curricular study sessions that semester. And he and Hawkeye had gotten each others' numbers pretty much right away in Korea.

But Trapper had married Louise. And he can't bring himself to regret it for an instant cuz it gave him Becky and Cathy. But Louise was so different from him - she dressed classy and she talked educated and she grew up in a neighborhood of houses instead of tenement blocks, a neighborhood where kids didn't grow up all crammed together and crawling all over each other like a litter of puppies. She expected to be courted and held at arms length a little. Not brought into contact with the rough and unpolished and visceral depth of his feelings for her.

At first, he'd liked that about her. She was everything he wasn't in terms of grace and class and money. A kinda representation of the life he was trying to live by going to a prestigious school and studying to be a surgeon. And she was smart and funny and beautiful and a great lay. What more could a guy ask for?

A whole hell of a lot, as it turns out. Cuz Hawkeye's all those things and more. Warm and caring and with a burning need to fight against death and injustice and even just plain old stupidity - and there sure is a lot of that lately. He doesn't care about conformity, doesn't try to pretend he's anyone other than who he is. And that makes it easier for Trapper to be who he is too. He can show Hawkeye the raw, unpolished, unpretty parts of himself - of his love for Hawkeye - and know that Hawk won't turn away.

With Hawkeye, it feels like it's ok for Trapper to live the life he wants, not the life he and everyone else is supposed to want. The life he used to try so hard to live.

Hawkeye nudges his shoulder gently and Trapper realizes he's been staring at the bottom of his empty suitcase for far too long. So he puts the past away and goes outside to his girls. To live the life he has now.

--

Becky and Cathy manage to talk them into going to the beach despite the weather not exactly being summery. Late November in Maine is pretty much the middle of winter and it's been known to snow as early as Halloween. But they hadn't been dissuaded by any logical argument, so they all troop down the road to the public beach. Hawkeye hasn't been to a beach since the fourth of July. And he honestly wasn't sure how it would go, especially with kids. But Maine is different enough from Korea - the foot of snow definitely helps - that he doesn't lose himself in the past at all. Maybe he'll be able to come up in the summer, even. Becky and Cathy have repeatedly expressed their desire to go swimming - even though they're currently wearing parkas and boots and about a sheep's worth of winter woolens each.

But despite not being allowed in the water, the girls have fun rushing between the rocks and tidepools while the adults follow along at a more sedate pace. Becky especially enjoys pointing out all the strange creatures living in the tidepools - and Hawkeye enjoys making up fanciful and completely false stories about them while his dad laughs and Trapper rolls his eyes in good-natured exasperation. Cathy has chosen instead to climb up on the biggest rocks she can find and then leap off them - triumphant - into Trapper's waiting arms. It's a good thing he's been hitting the gym so that he can withstand the force of gravity plus one six-year-old human cannonball.

Eventually, the girls get tired of the beach and it nears dinner time, so they head home in a straggling clump. Cathy's thrown over Trapper's shoulders like a wriggling, giggling sack of potatoes and Becky - damp and salt flecked - bounces between Hawkeye and his dad like a pinball. Hawkeye wonders how the hell his dad did this whole parenting thing all by himself all the time. Because Trapper may have two daughters but they're practically sedate in comparison to how Hawkeye had been at their respective ages. Maybe it explains all the summers he spent in New York with his aunts and uncles.

--

Dinner's great. They're doing a kinda belated Thanksgiving thing with turkey and stuffing and cranberry sauce and pie - and it's all delicious. Thanksgiving was never really a big thing in the McIntyre house growing up - it just meant his ma had a lot more work the week before cuz everyone wanted their houses extra clean to impress visiting family - but Hawkeye'd grown up a lot more Norman Rockwell than Trapper had. But the whole thing's relaxed - nothing like the strained, formal dinners with Louise's family - and they spend as much time joking around as eating. It's nice.

And after dinner, they all go into town to look at the Christmas decorations that apparently go up around Crabapple Cove the Friday after Thanksgiving every year like clockwork. This is another Pierce family tradition, another glimpse into Hawkeye's life as a kid. It makes Trapper feel all warm inside that Daniel and Hawkeye are willing to share this with him and his kids. And the girls are clearly having a great time looking at all the lights and window displays - Trapper is sure they'll have lists for Santa half finished by the end of the night - and the big Maine pine decked out with lights and ornaments in the town square. It's fun to experience that sorta small-town celebration that Trapper's never seen outside of movies.

What's less fun is all the people who mob Hawkeye. Old ladies asking why he's been away so long and practically pinching his cheeks. Young women - at least some of whom Hawk'd clearly dated in the past - looking to get to know him again. And Trapper's not really a jealous kinda guy. He and Hawkeye have had their share of other relationships - even while they were sleeping together in Korea. Trapper wouldn't begrudge him a little flirting, wouldn't begrudge him finding another bed for the night, even. But he sure ain't mad when Hawkeye presses a little closer into his side and turns them all down. He does it kindly and with a sense of humor - the girls depart without any ruffled feathers - but Hawkeye makes it plain he ain't on the market anymore. And the sideways glances, the quick brush of their gloved hands, makes it clear to Trapper - if no one else - exactly why that is.

Finally, the girls are all wore out - Trapper has to carry Becky back to the Pierce house, half asleep already - and Hawk stays pressed close the whole way back. He's practically glued to Trapper's side all through getting the girls to bed - with minimal protesting for once, they're dead tired after such an exciting day. And he stays glued to Trapper all through their own getting ready for bed. Sure, Hawkeye's a cuddly guy - but they don't usually brush their teeth standing so close that Trapper almost elbows him in the face a couple times. But Hawk'll talk about it when he's ready so all Trapper does is whisper goodnight and hold him close as they lie in bed.

--

It's strange. He's been living with Trapper for months now - together in every way they could possibly be. Hawkeye's also spent time with Becky and Cathy - everything from helping them with homework to helping Trapper tuck them into bed. He's remained Uncle Hawkeye to the girls. They're family. But it's never felt quite so real, quite so true as it has today.

Maybe it's the holidays. Thanksgiving is for family and even though theirs had been belated, they'd still had it - with all of Hawkeye's family. Maybe it's his dad being there. His easy acceptance of Trapper and the girls into his home, his life, his family. Maybe it's all of those things. But as Hawkeye had walked through Crabapple Cove that evening - watched all the families out together - it had really hit him that he has that too.

Maybe not the way he expected to. Maybe not in a way that would be recognizable to others. But he has it all the same. And he didn't - doesn't - want that feeling of warmth and family and belonging to go away. So he's stayed pressed into Trapper's side, even if it got to be a little silly or inconvenient. And Trapper - easygoing and accepting of all of Hawkeye's strangeness - has taken this too in stride. Sheltering Hawkeye under his arm from all the old busybodies and young paramours. Holding him now as they lay here in bed. Not pressing Hawkeye to do or be or talk about anything. Content to just be.

God, Hawkeye loves him so much.

"I love you, Trap," he breathes into Trapper's chest, not sure how he'll react to that sort of declaration from him.

Trapper shifts around a little so that he can look at Hawkeye. And his eyes are so full of warmth.

"I love you too, Hawk." Said like it's a fundamental truth of the universe, an immutable fact of life. Said like he's been saying it everyday for months.

Hawkeye thinks back to all the touches, all the closeness, all the understanding they've shared over those months and thinks maybe he's been saying it too.

[aion-rsa]

New Netflix Christmas Movies in 2020 Ranked from Best to Worst

https://ift.tt/3q2Rba0

Netflix is doing its level best to eat everyone else’s entertainment lunch, and the holiday movie game is no exception. Just a few short years after planting the flag that was the cult megahit A Christmas Prince, the streamer has more offerings than ever, including some sequels to their top-notch 2018 productions. We break down some of this winter’s already released heavy hitters so you know what to watch and what to skip.

Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey

Available Now

This star-studded Christmas musical is the most magical of the bunch. Picture The Wiz meets Willy Wonka, with John Legend as a producer. Forest Whitaker stars as a down-and-out toymaker who has lost his touch and everything else that makes life special: his wife (Sharon Rose) has passed and his daughter (Tony winner Anika Noni Rose, Little Fires Everywhere, The Princess and the Frog) moved away, estranged. Years earlier he created a unique matador toy that comes to life (voiced by a delightfully villainous Ricky Martin, who has a lot of fun with a wandering accent). The naughty toy and the toymaker’s apprentice (Kegan-Michael Key) left with the toymaker’s book of ideas, putting him out of business and making themselves mega-rich.

Things really get going when the toymaker’s granddaughter (bonafide star Madalen Mills, who I can’t believe is a newcomer) comes to town and she, along with a neighborhood boy with aspirations of being a great toy inventor, try to save the toymaker from himself. There’s singing, dancing, baroque steampunk galore, earnest lessons learned, and magic that’s something like science. It’s the kind of movie the phrase “family fun adventure” was invented to describe.

Clocking in at more than two hours, this one could tighten up the runtime a bit, but that just means there are plenty of safe opportunities to refill your eggnog or run to the restroom. I dare you to watch this movie and not feel the holiday spirit.

Operation Christmas Drop

Available Now

In order to protect her boss’ interests, congressional aide Erica (our girl Kat Graham/Bonnie Bennet from Vampire Diaries!) is sent to a military base in the Pacific over Christmas to find excess spending in order to justify budget cuts. Her biggest target is Operation Christmas Drop, a real-life program where service members from the U.S., Japan, and Australia drop presents (and life-saving supplies) to remote surrounding islands. Hyper-focused Erica knows there’s a possible promotion on the line and she has to work harder than a bunch of white dudes named Matt back in DC in order to get it, putting her at odds with the base’s own Santa, Capt. Andrew Jantz (Andrew Ludwid, Vikings, The Hunger Games). 

Any time one of these movies has a protagonist of color, it’s unfortunately notable, though Netflix (with the exception of the Christmas Prince franchise) creates more diverse offerings than just about anyone else. In addition to directly engaging with how much harder the Ericas of the world have to work to get their due, Operation Christmas Drop also highlights the people who live on Guam and the surrounding islands, as the first full-length major studio movie filmed there. 

Featuring the old favorite romance trope “enemies to lovers,” a tropical Christmas, and some of the real-life people who make the actual Christmas Drop possible, Operation Christmas Drop is an ideal holiday romcom. It’s still goofy at times and heart-fluttery at others, and of course everything will work out in the end, but it’s better written than most of what’s on TV and casting Kat Graham is always a good choice.

The Princess Switch, Switched Again

Available Now

It’s not Christmas until you’ve seen Vanessa Hudgens chloroform herself. The sequel to 2018’s The Princess Switch, The Princess Switch, Switched Again, rightly knows that Kevin (Nick Sagar) is a better leading man than the walking melba toast that is Prince Edward (Sam Palladio). When we last saw the sous chef dad with the six-pack abs who likes sappy Christmas movies and wearing the hell out of sweaters, he was making out with Lady Margaret. In the two years since then, they’ve split up, the king of Montenaro has passed away, and Margaret’s cousin who was next in line for the throne has abdicated, which means Lady Margaret will be crowned on Christmas. Naturally. 

The Princess Switch franchise has found the sweet spot between “painfully bad” and “so bad it’s good.” The latest iteration adds what the first lacked – a worthy villain. Vanessa Hudgens gleefully vamps around as a Kardashian-esque cousin of Lady Margaret’s who goes after the Montenaran crown. It’s fun to watch Hudgens be bad, and it adds a requisite layer of novelty to the proceedings. 

There’s also a little crossover moment from the Christmas Prince franchise. It’s very quick and I don’t think anyone even says a word, but it’s a fun one for fans. It also probably means that in the world of the NCCU (Netflix Christmas Cinematic Universe), The Christmas Prince movies are documentaries, which is more than I can handle. 

It’s a rarity, but with The Princes Switch, the sequel is even better than the original. The Princess Switch 2 knows exactly what kind of movie it is – fun, silly, romantic, distracting, a purveyor of both great and terrible fashion, and maybe a little eye roll-inducing. Perfection. 

Holidate

Available Now

If you like a little spice with your sugar, Holidate is the right holiday rom-com. Netflix is already the anti-Hallmark in this category, trading judgey and Jesus-y for a sense of humor and soundtracks worth bookmarking on Spotify. And Holidate doubles down on the snark and PG-13-ness of it all.

Emma Roberts and Luke Bracey star as Sloane and Jackson, two singles sick of shrugging off a million questions and setups throughout the holiday season. The cast is rounded out with Frances Fisher (Watchmen, Titanic), Jessica Capshaw from Grey’s Anatomy, SNL’s Alex Moffat, Jake Manley from The Order, and Manish Dayal of Halt and Catch Fire and The Hundred-Foot Journey, proving he deserves to play a romantic lead.

Taking inspiration from Sloane’s perpetually single Aunt Susan (Kristin Chenoweth, who gets away with being so much weirder than anyone else ever could thanks to her many charms), Luke and Sloane go out as platonic dates to a year’s worth of holidays, starting with New Year’s. That also means that while we see two Christmas’, the movie spends a large chunk of time on the other holidays – St. Patrick’s Day, the Fourth of July, Halloween, etc – so this one doesn’t always feel the most Christmas-y. 

Read more

TV

Christmas Movies and TV Specials: Full 2020 Schedule

By Den of Geek Staff

Movies

The Best Alternative Christmas movies

By Mark Harrison

This flick may end up being too tart (or just plain awkward) for some, and the repeated use of the word “pussy” during what’s ostensibly a Christmas movie is not for everyone. But if all the sappiness of the season is feeling too saccharine and you’re sick of being seated at the kids table or getting grilled about when you’ll finally get married, Holidate might just hit the spot.

The Christmas Chronicles 2

Available Now

The follow-up to one of Netflix’s best family holiday offerings, The Christmas Chronicles 2 brings back Kurt Russell’s cool Santa for a sequel that has 100 percent more wormholes and time travel than fun side characters and snappy jokes. There’s a much larger role for Goldie Hawn’s Mrs. Claus, who is something of a kind-hearted Christmas sorceress. Kate (Darby Camp, Big Little Lies) is now staring down the barrel of teenagerhood and spending Christmas in Cancun while her mom makes heart-eyes at a new guy, who brings with him his 10 year-old son, Jack (Jahzir Bruno).

Big brother Teddy (Judah Lewis) moves into the backdrop as Kate and Jack go on an adventure in the North Pole, squaring off with one of Santa’s former elves, Belsnickel (Julian Dennison, Hunt for the Wilderpeople, Deadpool 2).

While it’s always nice to revisit a favorite – and Christmas Chronicles is so much about the best aspects of a family movie – the sequel loses a lot of that appeal. Without a clear and compelling story to drive the plot forward like the original had, Christmas Chronicles 2 lags significantly throughout and it’s unclear when the adventure starts, what it’s goals are, and then the movie even struggles to wrap up as a result.

It doesn’t help that this movie is bogged down by some convoluted mythology tying the elves to Christianity via the Star of Bethlehem that low-key paints Santa as a Moses-like figure.

The musical number does bring things back to life for a while. This time it’s in a 1990-era Logan airport in Boston with Darlene Love singing a duet with Santa instead of Stevie Van Zandt, though they are singing his song, “The Spirit of Christmas.”

This makes for Darlene Love’s second appearance in the NCCU; The first was Holiday Rush, where she played Rush’s Aunt Jo. I’m ignoring the fact that she’s credited as “Denise” in Christmas Chronicles 2 and choosing to believe that Aunt Jo worked a desk for Pan Am, TSA or whoever in the ‘90s to pay the bills while waiting for her true calling as a singer to take off.

Dolly Parton’s Christmas on the Square

Available Now

In between funding a possible cure for the coronavirus and trying to solve illiteracy, Dolly Parton found time to star in and write 14 original songs for a Christmas special. The great Debbie Allen of Fame fame (more recently, Dr. Catherine Avery on Grey’s Anatomy) directs this all-singing, all-dancing Christmas musical, bringing her multi-talented prowess to bear. That means this thing follows the musical tropes more closely than those of a typical Christmas TV movie, even though it also falls into the Hallmark penchant for religiosity that feels a bit off.

The best parts of Christmas on the Square are all the toe-tapping small-town songs about the townsfolk banding together to stop local Scrooge named Regina (played with adroit dry wit by Christine Baranski) from selling off their town. There’s a pastor named Christian (obviously) and a cute kid who gets hurt but only in a way that’s dramatic and leaves her still very cute and able to join in the final town celebration. That’s the kind of silly holiday fun we all signed up for. 

Regina’s best friend Margeline (Jenifer Lewis, The Princess and The Frog, Black-ish) is a scene-stealer and the back half of the movie is lesser for her relative absence. The numbers get a little less zippy and the movie feels a lot longer than roughly an hour and a half. Somewhere along the way, we get the sort of slutshame-y backstory of Baranski’s character, whose first-ever high school dance resulted in a pregnancy which she (obviously) carried to term. Her father took her baby away from her while she was crying in the delivery room, giving it up for adoption. Pretty intense for the genre! 

It’s not like the movie becomes a portrait of gritty realism from there–Dolly Parton is definitely a floating, glowing, rhinestone-encrusted angel, although that’s closer to what folks come for. An underutilized Jeanine Mason (Roswell, NM) and Matthew Johnson (Songland) – whose voice is arresting – add to the fun, but there’s no two ways around it: It’s an odd little movie.

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The post New Netflix Christmas Movies in 2020 Ranked from Best to Worst appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[bad-draft-stuff]

c.AU 2

witty joke

Sheepy: *You know what the rudest thing to do when someone is sleeping is? Talking! But unfortunately, Kay, you have a roommate that doesn't comprehend that all hours are sleeping hours here!* Arsé-kun: *Sometimes people get phone calls from other people. It is a fact of life and also it is probably a good time to get the fuck up. Whatever time it might actually be. Kay doesn't know or care.* Sheepy: *It definitely sounds like Grif is on the phone!... in the kitchen!* Arsé-kun: *Kay checks his pockets and finds his phone. Okay, so Grif isn't on HIS phone at least* Sheepy: *Good sign. So he's probably using his own.* Arsé-kun: *It's probably some brick nokia that can only make calls bc this bitch can't read* Arsé-kun: *Either way, Kay isn't worried about it. College kid on his phone, what's he gonna do* Sheepy: *Good question! What will you do to start the day? Arsé-kun: *bathroom.* Sheepy: *good (?) start* Arsé-kun: *Brief montage of Fou chasing a moth while we wait for that to be over with* Sheepy: *Elyan will even help him!* Sheepy: *What will you do next, Kay?* Arsé-kun: *Get food. Interrupt Grif if he's feeling bitchy. Consider punting Fou into space.* Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: *on speaker, apparently* ---No, Griflet. You cannot blend potato juice and tomato juice and expect it to taste good. It simply does not work that way. Sheepy: Grif: Have you tried french fries with ketchup? Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: Many times. However, the components vary greatly outside of the base two plants. It is like... It's like how dipping fries into ice cream is acceptable, but dipping them into plain milk absolutely is not. Sheepy: Grif: Why would you dip fries into ice cream? Sheepy: Grif: Ice cream is perfect. It shouldn't be soiled. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: .... I cannot argue with this statement. Even if I disagree. Sheepy: Grif: It can go with certain warm things. Brownies and cookies... but it melts too fast. Arsé-kun: Kay: *is somehow disappointed by how mundane this is. he fully expected some weird shit* Sheepy: Grif: But what if my cooking level becomes high enough I can make slower melting ice cream? A goal to achieve. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: Please consider what you put the ice cream into. It may melt slower in a container that retains cold. No guarantees. Sheepy: Grif: Amazing. Containers are important... Arsé-kun: *Kay wonders why his microwave is open* Sheepy: Grif: I didn't think so. I just put it in whatever I found. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: That was your mistake. Sheepy: Grif: Ah... Sheepy: Grif: They never melt in the carton so clearly the carton is the ideal place... But how awkward, opening up an ice cream carton and clearly seeing someone has eaten from it. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: Incorrect. It is the storage place that prevents melting. The carton should be able to do that, though. It'd be nice. Sheepy: Grif: Really? Sheepy: Grif: What is the ideal container? Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: In general, or that humans have? Sheepy: Grif: Humans. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: Insulated bowls do exist. Sheepy: Grif: I wonder if Kay has them. It might be difficult for me to buy. Sheepy: Grif: Although, maybe if I started fighting stronger foes I'd get better drops... Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: A carton containing a trace amount of power from Aphoom-Zhah would work in theory, but holding it would be impossible for anyone humanoid.... And stay within your range. You've already had one bad experience this week. Sheepy: Grif: So maybe I might have difficulties touching it? Sheepy: Grif: I'll train harder so I can start fighting for better drops. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: I recommend it. Sheepy: Grif: Although, knowing where to focus improvement is difficult. Sheepy: Grif: Maybe I need to be tankier. But if I can defeat my foes before they hit me, I'll have the same effect. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: Knowing when someone is within sneak attacking range is also important, but apparently difficult. Sheepy: Grif: Sneaking... Sheepy: Grif:...... Sheepy: Grif: I should get better at that. My level in stealth is very low. Arsé-kun: Kay: Not my fault you're deaf as hell. *as he bumps the fridge closed* Sheepy: Grif:...?! Sheepy: *Grif reaches for his right side before pausing, staring at Kay* Arsé-kun: Kay: Hey, don't you fuckin' dare or you'll be outta here faster than you can goddamn blink! Sheepy: Grif: You startled me. Sheepy: Grif: Don't sneak up on me like that. Arsé-kun: Kay: Ain't no sneaking when I walked into my own kitchen for lunch, moron. Sheepy: Grif: Eh... Sheepy: Grif: I have to get better at stealth and better at detection. Arsé-kun: Kay: And why's my fuckin' microwave open? Sheepy: Grif: Well, I was talking to my dad. Arsé-kun: Kay: I hear this, but don't you have a phone? Sheepy: Grif: Phone? Sheepy: Grif: I've seen these before. Sheepy: Grif: But they look fragile. How scary. Imagine breaking it, how much that would cost you to repair it. Arsé-kun: Kay: Didn't you use mine already..? Sheepy: Grif: I didn't enjoy it. The anxiety of potentially breaking it in some way... It's too much. Arsé-kun: Kay: So you're using.... My microwave. Somehow. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. I was talking to my dad. Sheepy: Grif: I could use the fridge instead if you'd like. Arsé-kun: Kay: Please don't. The food in there needs to stay cold. Sheepy: Grif: I see.. Then what? Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: There are several human-made cellular devices that are more sturdy. Perhaps look into that? Sheepy: Grif: With what money? Sheepy: Grif: I have to grind to be able to farm more efficiently. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: You're farming at a college. No one there has money. Sheepy: Grif: Really? Sheepy: Grif: But why aren't they paid for doing their work? Because it's at home? Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: the economy is in shambles and only so many people have money. Most do not. So anything off path that goes looting is not getting money either. Sheepy: Grif:.....? Sheepy: Grif: So if I got a shambler limb drop and tried to sell it, I couldn't? Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: Many places do not take things like that. However, you must find the ones that do. Sheepy: Grif: Where? Are there any on this campus? heepy: Grif: If so, I suspect that it would be someone in the medical field. Specifically someone who experiments with inhuman things. Sheepy: Grif: If I can get someone to buy my stock of shambler limbs, I will buy a phone. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: I cannot answer that. Sheepy: Grif: I see... I know what I must do. Sheepy: Grif: Today my day will be busy. Sheepy: Grif: I will ask everyone on the campus to buy my shambler limbs, starting with who is most likely to buy them. Sheepy: Grif: If none of the professors are willing to buy them, I'll ask the students. Perfect. Sheepy: Grif: If nobody is willing to buy them... I'll ask Dad? But I don't know that he has money... Are gold coins a current currency? How many gold coins is a phone? Sheepy: Grif: Maybe it's better to convert gold coins before buying a product with them. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: In some places, yes. This is not one of them. Sheepy: Grif: I see... Sheepy: Grif: Too bad. Sheepy: Grif: I'll try asking the professors then. Sheepy: Grif: Kay, do you want to come with me? Arsé-kun: Kay: Uh, I might... Actually, hold on. *he stops and goes digging through unsorted backpack papers (the rare few) for a schedule. It is in the folder on the table. he's an idiot* Arsé-kun: Kay: *finding it eventually* i do have a class today, so I can't. It's in..... Shit, twenty minutes, fuck me right up! Sheepy: Grif: If you insist. Arsé-kun: Kay: NOT LIKE THAT Sheepy: Grif: Go to class then. Arsé-kun: Kay: So bye Grif, bye Grif's cooler dad, I have to go to a horrible class I don't want, fuck meeeeeee Arsé-kun: *Kay powerwalking out to get ready real fast* Sheepy: Grif: Ah... He's comparing you two. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: If I were to be prideful, I'd say he's right. Sheepy: Grif: Hmmm... Sheepy: Grif: Well, maybe he'll be able to meet Dad soon. If he wakes up soon. Sheepy: Grif: Anyway, I should find the professor who will buy my loot. Arsé-kun: Kay: I have biology, maybe he likes weird biology too. Sheepy: Grif: Then I'll go with you. Arsé-kun: Kay: uhhh. Sheepy: Grif: Yes? Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: I do know of the man you speak. Allow me to handle that end. Arsé-kun: *visible kay confusion* Sheepy: Grif: I see. Thank you. Arsé-kun: Grif's Gamer Dad: If the professor asks why you are there, tell him Yog sent you. Sheepy: Grif: Ah. He's an enemy of yours. "Yog sends his regards". Arsé-kun: Yog: Not at all. Sheepy: Grif: I see... A friend. A friendly threat instead. Sheepy: Grif: Worry not. My threats will be positive and uplifting. Arsé-kun: *Kay gets ready by changing his pants offscreen and that's about it* Sheepy: Grif: I will follow Kay to find his professor. Sheepy: Grif: Right. One important thing. [QUEST ADDED: I Herb U Liek Shamblers] Arsé-kun: *very muffled Yog laughter* Sheepy: Grif: Now I'm ready. Sheepy: *Grif eventually heads out with Kay!* Arsé-kun: *Kay is not happy about Biology. Kay is not happy about body science* Sheepy: Grif: What do you do in biology? Learn the best ways to say farewell to birds? Arsé-kun: Kay: It's anatomy. Body stuff. Shoot, is that what this is? I just wrote it as "Biology" but... Sheepy: Grif: I think it's best said as it is in the name. "Bye, owl...gee". Short, yet showing you feel sad about them leaving. Sheepy: Grif: Anatomy? I know a lot about that. For example, did you know you have five fingers on each hand? Arsé-kun: Kay: Gee. No shit. Sheepy: Grif: If you didn't, why didn't you look at your hands before? Arsé-kun: Kay: Sarcasm. Nobody says "No shit" in all seriousness except rarely. Sheepy: Grif: Some people do. Like people explaining their symptoms to gastroenterologists. Arsé-kun: Kay: Why the FUCK do you know what that is?! Sheepy: Grif: Do you not? Sheepy: Grif: It's where you go when your tummy hurts a little too much for a little too long. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Okay, fair enough. Sheepy: Grif: It's where you go when you eat a shiny rock. Sheepy: Grif: Many animals eat things becauze they're shiny. Fish. Sharks. Lizards. Me. Arsé-kun: Kay: Moron. Sheepy: Grif: If it's good enough for fish, it's good enough for me. Sheepy: Grif: But my stomach hurt for a long time... Arsé-kun: Kay: Don't eat rocks. *kay consults his college map again to locate his class* Sheepy: Grif: Instead it just made me sad. Sheepy: Grif: And in pain. Sheepy: Grif: But you don't eat rocks, so maybe he's just unique? Arsé-kun: Kay: That sounds like a personal thing. Sheepy: Grif: How confusing... we can ask the anatomy guy. Sheepy: Grif: Are we close? Arsé-kun: Kay: Getting there. Sheepy: Grif: Yes, every step we walk gets us closer to the completion of my quest. Arsé-kun: Kay: At least one of us will have fun... Sheepy: Grif: You're having fun? That brings me joy. I'll have fun, too, then. Arsé-kun: Kay: Look, moron, I already don't like the blood thing, do you think I'm gonna enjoy human organs in great detail?? Sheepy: Grif:? Arsé-kun: Kay: I'm going to hate this so much. It's, uh, 147, this is 134... 136... 152??? I hate college buildings. Sheepy: Grif: *he begins clapping* Sheepy: Grif: You can count higher than 10. Amazing. I knew you could do it. I'm proud of you. Sheepy: Grif:........ Ha. Ha. Ha. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yes??? I'm a math student?? I sure fuckin' hope I can! Now help me find my classroom, you know numbers! Sheepy: Grif: I will do my best. Sheepy rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 2 Arsé-kun rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 20 Arsé-kun: *grif does not do his best* Arsé-kun: *eventually Kay finds the little shitty side hallway. It was on his blind side. Grif did not help him at all. Not big surprise* Sheepy: Grif: Where are we? Sheepy: Grif: Are you ready to starve to death in this labyrinthian limbo we have been cast into? Arsé-kun: Kay: The hall is right here. We went right past it. Sheepy: Grif: I didn't see it. Arsé-kun: Kay: Me neither. Okay, now shut up and move, lets go, I'm already goddamn late. Sheepy: Grif: Right. Arsé-kun: *some of the lecture can be heard from down the hall. the man might be using a megaphone.* Sheepy: Grif:...? Arsé-kun: Dr. Herbert: *with a megaphone* --And as I stated, we will not be using textbooks, guidebooks, strategy guides, or sparknotes! Everything will be based on your retention of what you observe and take note of yourself! If you miss something? Too bad, unless you want to observe your own organs! I am not allowed to actually recommend that, of course, but it doesn't mean I can't say it! Arsé-kun: Kay: *quietly* oh no... Arsé-kun: Herb: *he spots Kay and Grif entering* And there are our stragglers! We can finally get started! Sheepy: Grif: Amazing. His voice projects through the use of a cone. I see now how he was capable of speaking to my dad. Arsé-kun: Kay: Shush! Sheepy: Grif: Ah. Right. *his expression turns more serious (somehow)* Yog Sothoth sends his regards. Arsé-kun: Herb: As I told the earliest students previously, I have more than just this teaching job, and most certainly will be doing it before and after class. There is a reason for the glass barrier between us, after all, and I am not stopping my real job for this-- *he finally registers what Grif said and finally pauses for a breath* Tell him his soggy regards have been considered. Arsé-kun: Herb: Now then! As I was saying, I am the chief medical examiner for the area. Coroner, forensics guy, corpse jockey, I don't care what you call it. Just expect it when you come into my office at some ungodly hour looking for an extension for a paper you should have done months beforehand. Sheepy: Grif: *he opens the closest thing capable of being opened* Dad, he said your regards are soggy. Arsé-kun: *Kay can swear he heard a faint laugh, but he's way more worried now about what the professor has under a sheet up front.* Arsé-kun: Herb: All of our lessons will be firsthand! Which means! I can finally!... Right, right, I've been informed that I am required to advise those with weak stomachs to brace themselves. But where's the fun in that?! So here! Sheepy: Grif: Firsthand? Do you need someone to do an autopsy on? Arsé-kun: Herb: I appreciate the offer, but I most certainly do not! Observe! *he then rips a sheet off the table next to him. That is a dead body. That is not a new corpse. This is why there is a glass screen between his side of the room and the students.* Arsé-kun: *Kay, and several other students, proceed to scream. This is a normal, instinctual reaction. No judging.* Sheepy: Grif: Ah. It's not fresh. Arsé-kun: *and kay also ducks under his desk and covers his face. oh no oh no oh no* Arsé-kun: Herb: Not at all. This one came into my office about a week after their unfortunate demise. Sheepy: Grif: Based on some reactions, though, you may have a new one or two. Sheepy: Grif:.... Ha. Ha. Ha. Arsé-kun: *Another student interrupts this exchange by raising their hand* Arsé-kun: Wilbur: Are we going to watch you open it, Professor? Arsé-kun: Herb: Eventually yes, but not today! Apparently it is frowned upon to "traumatize" the students on day one. You all came in here knowing there were going to be human body parts! Sheepy: Grif: Zippers usually make things easier to open. Did you remember to install one for future use? Arsé-kun: *Wilbur whips around and throws an eraser at Grif. Shut up.* Sheepy: *Grif catches it* Arsé-kun: Herb: ... But I was specifically told, by the dean: "Do not open the body on day one". I can still do THIS! *he easily pulls off and casually throws aside the poor corpse's scalp. The entire thing.* Those of you interested in passing or just plain interested, you may come up to the barrier to see! Sheepy: Grif: *he isn't bothered by this.* Arsé-kun: Red: Wow! Lil C-sto, that brain's almost as big as Red's! *big mans elbows his much smaller friend* Sheepy: Christo: Oh, yes, just about. Arsé-kun: *Some students approach the barrier. Some do not. One stays firmly under his desk* Sheepy: Grif: Oh, this is the premium learning spot? *he joins Kay under his desk* Arsé-kun: *it is not. this is the underdesk of misery and suffering* Sheepy: Grif: Did you know that rhe brain is covered in wrinkles to improve processing power? So what if a doctor did brain surgery to wrinkle your brain? Arsé-kun: Herb: Then there would be more space for information to be stored in theory. I'm not a brain surgeon, so I can't offer knowledge on this. Sheepy: Grif: Amazing. Modern technology truly is useful. You could iron out your enemy's brains to remove their wrinkles. Arsé-kun: Herb: You're better off hitting them with the iron directly as blunt force trauma. Which, coincidentally, was what happened to this poor sod. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. I could tell. Sheepy: Grif: But what's concerning is that I don't think it was something from off of the path that did it. Their damage is different. Therefore, it was most likely a human, or something imitating one. heepy: Grif: And it wasn't my uncle because he wouldn't dirty his hands like that... But he could drive someone else to do it... Arsé-kun: *thankfully most people aren't listening to Grif. stop infodumping* Sheepy: Christo: So if they died from blunt force trauma, this brain wouldn't be representative of how brains usually look his many days after death, right? Arsé-kun: Herb: Correct! However, as it has been some time, there is atrophying. That is normal. Sheepy: Grif: Atrophy? So it wins prizes for making good times on the decaythlon? ...Ha. Ha. Ha. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: Grif, please do shut up. Sheepy: Grif: Ah... Arsé-kun: Wilbur: At least wait until after class... Sheepy: Grif: ...! Yes. I can wait. *Grif quickly cheered back up!* Arsé-kun: *at least someone is happy* Sheepy: *Grif goes back to keeping an eye on Kay.* Arsé-kun: *Kay is still having a very bad time* Sheepy: *Now Kay can have a very bad time as Grif tries to comfort him! Not very well* Arsé-kun: *reality check! pat pat pat pat pat* Sheepy: Grif: Hello? Sheepy: Grif: He did this when I came back injured, too. Should we be doing something about this? Arsé-kun: Yog: I cannot make decisions for you. There are several options open. Sheepy: Grif: How to deal with trauma. #1: Remove the trauma. #2: Repeat #1 until it works. Sheepy: Grif: However, if you knock someone out, they can't have a panic attack. Sheepy: Grif: However, if I do it, I will surely injure him. *he raises his voice* Wilbur, my roommate is suffering. Put him out of his misery temporarily. He can suffer more later. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: What on this Earth would you like me to do?? *he turns around to shoot Grif a dirty look. it is not as dirty as he intended it to be* Sheepy: Grif: A quick chop should do the trick. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: That is called "possible brain or spinal damage" and the answer is no. Sheepy: Grif: I'll do it myself then. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: That is even worse. Sheepy: Grif: But he's crying. Sheepy: Grif: He's scared of blood because it reminds him of past events. Sheepy: Grif: It's also known as p'tsd. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: Does "tact" have a meaning to you? Or "being subtle?" *he sighs* Sheepy: Grif: Tact is very important. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: Despite this, you have none. Sheepy: Grif: No! I do! Strike the foe from behind! Sheepy: Grif: Go for the weak point. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: That's a tactic. Fine, I'll deal with it. Take notes for me. Sheepy: Grif: I will do my best. Sheepy: Grif: I will pick on the strongest first, because those who go for the weak are weak themselves. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: Not like that you buffoon. Sheepy: Grif:? Arsé-kun: Wilbur: *he just sighs again* Never mind. Don't bother. I'll deal with it on my own time. Sheepy: Grif: I will do my best. Sheepy: Grif: *he gets out from under the desk and approaches the body* Arsé-kun: *there is a glass barrier. that is as far as you may go* Sheepy: Grif: [Information added: Dead body - "It's the body of someone who's dead".] Arsé-kun: *Yog has no right to judge because he's the one making these entries* Sheepy: Grif: Where was this body found? Arsé-kun: Herb: On the side of the road. Sheepy: Grif:....... Arsé-kun: Herb: Boring, isn't it? But at least it narrows it down to a human homicide and not something else. Sheepy: Grif: My job is to protect everyone from danger, but now the danger is inside in a form I could never distinguish from an innocent... Arsé-kun: Herb: A lot of people are like that. Like your trash uncle. Anyway, getting back on track-- Sheepy: *Grif listens intently to Herb rambling about anatomy.* Arsé-kun: *Grif learns more than he ever wanted abour human anatomy. He now knows several more places to injure to commit kill.* Sheepy: Grif: *INT UP!* Sheepy: Grif: I can now target weak points while sneaking. Sheepy: Grif: *he decides to go check on Kay and Wilbur. hewwo* Arsé-kun: *Kay looks miserable and embarrassed. At least he isn't crying anymore* Sheepy: Grif: You stopped crying. Good. Your face looks better without tears, but it still needs work. Arsé-kun: *Confusion has been added to the conglomerate of emotions on Kay's face* Sheepy: Grif: Self care is important for making yourself shine. That's where you can improve. A smile, too, but that's hard to do with nothing to smile about. Arsé-kun: *Wilbur stopped paying attention the second Griflet intended to re-enter the scene and is doing his homework. He is not enjoying the cramped underdesk but what can you do* Sheepy: Grif: Also, I listened to him, so I have grown stronger. Dad helped me write notes for you. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: If it consists of nothing but "Brain: the thing in your head" and several puns, I'm leaving you in charge of Duncan daycare for the next week. Sheepy: Grif:?! Sheepy: Grif: But... he is hard to take care of when I can't see him. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: That sounds like a personal problem. Sheepy: Grif: I must learn how. Sheepy: Grif: However, my notes should be more accurate considering I listened to him. Sheepy: Grif: "The victim and the culprit had a bash, but the culprit got ahead of themself and hit the victim, causing damage to the brain along with death. Witnesses admit, 'the strike was on par with a golf player smacking a golf ball with a golf club', noting that the tools used in both situations are one and the same." Sheepy: Grif:..... Ha. Ha. Ha. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: ..... How am I related to you? Do not answer that. Sheepy: Grif: Through Dad. I learned this from him. Sheepy: Grif: Worry not. I have real notes. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: Thank you. Sheepy: *Grif reads his notes off to Wilbur* Arsé-kun: *Wilbur gets his notes. Sure, it might not be English, but only Kay loses out on this one* Arsé-kun: *Kay gets no chances to relax in this goddamn class.png* Sheepy: Grif: Does that help? Arsé-kun: Wilbur: Greatly. You will not deal with Duncan babysitting duty. Yet. Sheepy: *Grif appears pleased! He successfully helped Wilbur!!* Arsé-kun: *Wilbur is pleased! He got his notes and Griflet didn't make a fool of himself! Arsé-kun: *Kay might be pleased, but anything is nice after that whole situation! Why??? Hell if I know!* Sheepy: Grif: [QUEST COMPLETED: A Noteworthy Achievement] Sheepy: Grif: Kay, I will explain them to you later. Don't worry. Sheepy: Grif: Unless you plan to drop out of the class. Arsé-kun: Kay: I want to. I really want to. Sheepy: Grif: Then do it. Sheepy: Grif: Or fish. Arsé-kun: Kay: I can't. I need the science class. This was the only one open. *he just ignores that last part* Sheepy: Grif: Why? Arsé-kun: Kay: Hell if I know. Sheepy: Grif: You aren't a science major. Sheepy: Grif: You're, eh.... Sheepy: Grif: *he brings up his menu and quickly starts skimming the relationship tab for Kay's major* Arsé-kun: Wilbur: Stop doing that in public. Someone might notice. Sheepy: Grif: But I don't remember. Arsé-kun: Kay: Just say Math. Sheepy: Grif: Your major... is Just same-ath... just same as what? Arsé-kun: Kay: ... .... Mathematics. Accounting. Don't ever ask me to shorten words for you ever again. That was a joke. Sheepy: Grif: Paimon, define accounting. Arsé-kun: Paimon (but actually Yog): Noun: the action or process of keeping financial accounts. Sheepy: Grif: Amazing. Accounting is the action of keeping accounts. Arsé-kun: Yog: Financial accounts. In other words, money. Sheepy: Grif: So moderators on computers don't do accounting. Arsé-kun: Yog: That is a different definition of the word "Account". Would you like this definition as well? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Yog: Noun. A user account is an identity created for a person in a computer or computing system. Sheepy: Grif: I put a password on mine because it told me to, but I can't tell you it because it told me not to. Arsé-kun: Yog: Correct. Sheepy: Grif: But if I forget it, I'll ask you what it is. Arsé-kun: Yog: There is a logistical flaw in this logic. I would point it out if I did not have a way around it. Sheepy: Grif: There's a high chance you saw me make it. Arsé-kun: Yog: And a higher chance you will inform me of it in the future. Sheepy: Grif: What? But it said not to tell anyone. Sheepy: Grif: It's a rule. I can't break rules. Sheepy: Grif: However, if it were a law instead of a rule, I could break it. Arsé-kun: Yog: A rule is a law that isn't political. Sheepy: Grif: It's different. Sheepy: Grif: One I can break. The other I can't. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: I'm almost sorry your roommate has to deal with this. It's almost Duncan Daycare in here. Sheepy: Grif: If you're sorry, you can take me instead. Sheepy: Grif: But I'm happy with Kay. Sheepy: Grif: However, for you, I will not break the law. Sheepy: Grif: But if a law and a rule contradict... Which do I follow? Arsé-kun: Wilbur: A law is just a rule deemed good enough to be official. Usually. Sheepy: Grif:....! Sheepy: Grif: Laws are rules, too... So I can't break them. Sheepy: Grif: If I break laws I will go to jail. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: I don't break laws. Duncan is Duncan. I can't really stop you, but who can? Sheepy: Grif: Duncan is above the law because you can't see him. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: Duncan also got shot at for committing several crimes. Sheepy: Grif: Who did it? I'll tear them to shreds!! ... Uh, but if they're human, I guess I can only rough them up a bit. Dismembering people is against the law. Arsé-kun: Wilbur: They were all human. It was too long ago anyway. He's not mad about it. Sheepy: Grif: So there's nothing I could do anyway. Sheepy: Grif:...Right, I remember now. I was here for a reason. Sheepy: Grif: I need to pawn off my loot so I can buy things with money. Arsé-kun: Kay: Money can be exchanged for goods and services. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: I have heard there is a special way to get a discount on things. By showing them your hand, you can get a "five finger discount". Arsé-kun: Kay: .... I don't think that's what that means. But you do what you're here for, I'm gonna, y'know, get the hell out of here. Sheepy: Grif: I will help you. Arsé-kun: Kay: You got shit to do! Do your shit! Arsé-kun: Wilbur: *rolling his eyes* Five finger discount means stealing. Crime. Go directly to jail, do not pass go, do not collect $200. Sheepy: Grif: If it's time for an exorcism, it's time for an exorcism! Arsé-kun: Kay: Where did you get THAT from? Moron. Go talk to the professor before I throw you into glass. Sheepy: Grif: Eh... But I thought... fine, I'll do it! Arsé-kun: *Herb is, like he said earlier, doing his actual job and working on the corpse. Several glowing syringes are involved. I do not think coroners use glowing stuff but I have also never watched a coroner do their job. Who knows? Not me.* Sheepy: *Grif approaches Herb* Sheepy: Grif: Hello. Sheepy: Grif: That's a nice corpse you've got there. It'd be a shame if someone offered to sell you more you may be interested in. Arsé-kun: Herb: ...? *he carefully places a syringe down and turns to Grif* Go on. Sheepy: Grif: I have loot like this. *he pulls out a shambler limb from his Inventory* Sheepy: Grif: I want to sell it. Sheepy: Grif: I am also good at fulfilling requests. Arsé-kun: *Herb immediately inspects the shambler limb. Forget having a real job to do! Alien limb!* Sheepy: Grif: Does that sound good? Requests would be more expensive because I have to go out and find it but I don't actually know what this is worth. I trust your judgement. Arsé-kun: Herb: It is a fantastic proposal. The only immediate downside is that I'm not quite sure how much this would be worth either. Sheepy: Grif: I have an idea. Sheepy: Grif: Dad, how much is this worth? Arsé-kun: Yog: *on a menu popup, not aloud* I will handle the transaction. This will not be the first time I make a deal with him, nor will it be the last. *a pause* Also he never told me not to save his credit card number. Sheepy: Grif: I see. You have his credit card number. I don't know how to use this, so I will leave it in your hands. Arsé-kun: Herb: .... ..... That does explain a lot. Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: Herb: Tell your father for me to please stop buying video game content with my credit card. It is not unlimited. I will run out of money eventually. Sheepy: Grif: Dad, Herb said to stop stealing his money. Sheepy: Grif: You can steal other people's money instead. Arsé-kun: Yog: *mac loading icon* nah Sheepy: Grif: He said he won't. Arsé-kun: Herb: Well, it was worth a try. Sheepy: Grif: He must like you to choose specifically you. Sheepy: Grif: Amazing. Good job. I cannot clap now, but I will give you a round of applause when my hands are empty. Arsé-kun: Herb: I cannot tell my accountant that an eldritch orb is using my cash to fund his video game addiction. Sheepy: Grif: Dad wouldn't need video games if he was allowed to visit more often. Sheepy: Grif: But when you're trapped all alone, you have a lot of free time on your hands. Arsé-kun: Herb: That isn't something I can do anything about, unfortunately. Sheepy: Grif: I want to help but I can't. Arsé-kun: *Herb goes back to inspecting the shambler limb that is now legally his. He's not entirely showing it, but he's very excited about it- So excited he pays no attention to the rising corpse behind him.* Sheepy: Grif:....! Arsé-kun: Herb: .... It's standing up behind me, isn't it. Sheepy: Grif: Move, I'll deal with it! Arsé-kun: *Herb moves aside. Combat begins* Sheepy: *Grif attacks the corpse!* >Hit 8 vs Armor 3 Sheepy: *Grif strikes it!* >14 dmg rsé-kun: *Griflet annihilates it in one shot! Congratulations! Coagulated blood is everywhere. Rotted organs are everywhere. It's very dead (again) (hopefully)* Sheepy: Grif: I won. Arsé-kun: Herb: You sure did. *he just looks at the mess and sighs* I'm going to have to call ol' Carl down for help, aren't I? Sheepy: Grif: Carl... Oh. My uncle? Hm... Hmmm... Sheepy: Grif: I beat him up yesterday. Sheepy: Grif: But he probably has healed since then. Arsé-kun: Herb: .... I hope so. Sheepy: Grif: I was gentler than usual. Sheepy: Grif: He should at least be healthy enough to clean. Arsé-kun: Yog: His response is "Why do I have to clean this mess up? I make the messes, not clean. That's Randy's job!" I will now remind him he is a janitor. Sheepy: Grif: Janitors clean things for money. Sheepy: Grif: If I didn't make messes, he wouldn't make money. Arsé-kun: Kay: *from the other end of the room, barely audible because of the glass barrier* Are you done yet?! Sheepy: Grif: ? *he raises his voice* I won. Arsé-kun: Kay: Cool, but are you done talking? Can we go yet?? Sheepy: Grif: *he rejoins Kay* Yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: Great! Any longer and you might make more explode. No thanks! Nope fuck that! Sheepy: Grif: Do you want me to? I am just getting started. Arsé-kun: Kay: No thank you! I've seen enough for one day!! Sheepy: Grif: Fine. Let’s go home then. Sheepy: Grif: I’ll show you more another day. Arsé-kun: *Score total: One win for Grif, one win for Herb, and a questionable score for Kay. Win-win-?* Sheepy: Grif: I have no quests after this. Arsé-kun: Kay: Great! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: Do you have plans today? Arsé-kun: Kay: No, but I do have an idea. Sheepy: Grif: Is it fun? Arsé-kun: Kay: I dunno. How do you feel about getting an order in for that Halloween week costume? Sheepy: Grif: I don't know how to. Sheepy: Grif: Who would I talk to? What would I ask for? Arsé-kun: Kay: I know... Most of that. I'm not sure what you'd want though. Or if you wanna stick with Bedi's genius theme. Sheepy: Grif: I don't remember it. Arsé-kun: Kay: Well, duh! No one told you yet! Sheepy: Grif: You can be the change you want to see. Arsé-kun: Kay: It's all based on one story, so Merlin gets to be an asshole cat, Lot stole my idea, Bedi gets to be a rabbit-eared man, Sheepy: Grif: Where are we going? Sheepy: Grif: You can choose my costume. I trust your judgement. Arsé-kun: Kay: You think I have the time to read the entirety of Alice in Wonderland and it's sequel?? Sheepy: Grif: I have heard of this book. Sheepy: Grif: It's got a character named Alice in it. Sheepy: Grif: It also has no dragons in it. Sheepy: Grif: I prefer stories about dragons, but... Sheepy: Grif: I don't like it when the knight kills the dragon. The dragon believes the princess should have her own free will and the knight blindly follows orders under the belief that they will bring him fame and glory. It's frustrating. Arsé-kun: Kay: Can't relate. Sounds shitty. Sheepy: Grif: You don't read about dragons? Dad said that everyone knows about dragons. Maybe they aren't as popular as he thought... Sheepy: Grif: He'll be disappointed to find that out. Arsé-kun: Kay: *he just gives Grif this flat look* I. Don't. Have. the Time. Sheepy: Grif: If you have the time to get drunk, you have time to learn about dragons. Sheepy: Grif: I know many things about dragons. Arsé-kun: Kay: You probably know accurate things about dragons. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. For example, some dragons can take on the appearance of humans. They blend in almost perfectly. You could meet a dragon without ever knowing it. Sheepy: Grif: Exciting, right? Arsé-kun: Kay: I mean, it kinda is. But on the other side, your uncle... But there's only one of him, right? Sheepy: Grif: He's unique. Sheepy: Grif: But he's intimidating. Sheepy: Grif: He's not trying right now, but if he bothered, he could cause people to hurt themselves or those they're close to. Sheepy: Grif: The fact he could be anyone you meet makes matters worse. Sheepy: Grif: But if he tries anything, I'll stop him. Sheepy: Grif: Anyway, we can ask someone who knows something about Alice in Wonderland. Sheepy: Grif: Maybe Dio can help. Arsé-kun: Kay: You can do off-road offpathing yourself. I'm not helping with that. Sheepy: Grif: Fine. Arsé-kun: Kay: Fine. Sheepy: Grif: You could also just be Alice. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... I'm not wearing a DRESS! Sheepy: Grif: You don't have to. Arsé-kun: Kay: Eh? Sheepy: Grif: You can wear whatever you want, can't you? Arsé-kun: Kay: I mean, yeah, but Alice wore a dress. Sheepy: Grif: Your Halloween costume can be creative. Alice without the dress. Arsé-kun: Kay: How... Sheepy: Grif: Do you wear the same outfit every day? Sheepy: Grif: I wear different outfits. Sheepy: Grif: Presumably Alice did too. Arsé-kun: Kay: Y-yeah, that's fair... Arsé-kun: Kay: My brain is still fried from that whole class.. I feel like I was hit by a truck but only mentally. Sheepy: Grif: We can even it out. Sheepy: Grif: However, I've never driven a truck before so I may miss you a few times. Arsé-kun: Kay: Uhhhh... Please don't! Sheepy: Grif: I'll try not to. Sheepy: Grif: Some of my shirts have writing on them I can't read but people often give me strange looks. Arsé-kun: Kay: I mean don't hit me with a truck, moron! Sheepy: Grif: Maybe they're trying to read it but struggling just like me. Sheepy: Grif: Maybe you can tell me if I've been embarrassing myself later. My dad gave me one with a black dragon, too. I like it, but people ask me the same question every time. Arsé-kun: Kay: Does it look kinda square and boxy? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: Lemme guess. "Do you like Minecraft"? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: It's a game. I don't care for it, but Lance likes it. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Dad must like it. Sheepy: Grif: He likes games. Arsé-kun: Kay: Orb father likes a cubist's dream come true the game. There's some irony here. Sheepy: Grif: Sometimes he's not an orb. Sometimes he appears human. I've heard his human appearance is very popular. Sheepy: Grif: You may recognize him from his popular catchphrase. Sheepy: Grif: "Hohoho". Sheepy: Grif: However, when I told Lucan, he responded with, "Don't tell Bedi, he still thinks he's real". Arsé-kun: Kay: .... But if he's who I think you mean, then he's real. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: But Lucan claims that everyone's parents fake being him and I must've misunderstood. Arsé-kun: Kay: No, it's true. He's right. Sheepy: Grif: Why? Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Oh, I get it. Lucan thought you were saying your Dad dresses up AS Santa, not that he IS. Which I hate, by the way. Sheepy: Grif: He is Santa because only he could be Santa. Sheepy: Grif: But if parents act lile their gifts are from someone else, their kids won't know who to thank. Arsé-kun: Kay: It's a weird situation. Sheepy: Grif: One day I want to celebrate Christmas with others. Arsé-kun: Kay: Christmas is in two months. Sheepy: Grif: That is a day. Arsé-kun: Kay: Sure is. Sheepy: Grif: I haven't been able to experience many holidays from a human perspective. I want to experience them all. Sheepy: *They head to the costume maker's place.* Sheepy: Grif: Is this where they are? Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah. They're usually somewhere in here if they're not in class. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: *Grif looks around.* Arsé-kun: *it's very empty around here. The hallway is very dusty in some places. Only some* Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, it's apparently been like this since the theater kids summoned something on accident. Only some people live here. Sheepy: Grif: Summoned? Theater? Sheepy: Grif: Oh, I get it now. Sheepy: Grif: Terrible idea on their part. Arsé-kun: Kay: The place was yellow for a month afterwards. It was ugly as hell. Sheepy: Grif: They should eventually clean up the dust. Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh, yeah. Sheepy: Grif: Hellooo? Sheepy: Grif: Is anyone alive? Sheepy: *Someone near by responds with a sarcastic "No!"* Arsé-kun: Kay: Thanks a fuckin' lot, bud, means so much to me. Sheepy: Grif:! Sheepy: Grif: Keep talking so I can track you down and put you to rest one last time! Arsé-kun: Kay: IT'S SARCASTIC! Sheepy: Grif: Hah! Don't you know, Kay? Sometimes, the dead refuse to pass. Sheepy: Grif: This is what is referred to as "resisting a rest". Arsé-kun: Kay: There's nobody that's faking it! Sheepy: Grif: So he was kidding? Sheepy: Grif:........ Sheepy: Grif:.......... Sheepy: Grif: Ha. Ha. Ha...? Sheepy: Grif:..... Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Anyway. Hey, Morty, pardon the moron, we're here to harass Garry. He's still busy, yeah? Sheepy: Morty: *he pokes his head out* When isn't he at this time of year? Sheepy: Grif: You look surprisingly not skeleton like. Sheepy: Grif: Although, sometimes when people pass away it's revealed there was a skeleton within them all along. Sheepy: Grif: Having one must be a lot of skelefun. Arsé-kun: *Kay bonks Grif over the head, slapstick style* Sheepy: Grif: Ah... Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, good point, but we're gonna add to his workflow. Isn't that nice of us? Sheepy: Morty: Do you want a real answer to that? Arsé-kun: Kay: The real answer is you kicking my ass, isn't it? Sheepy: Morty: Yes. You're lucky he's so patient. If you don't pay him well, I'll take you down - I mean, in for your crimes. Sheepy: Grif: What an odd request, but I will do it. Let me find the best place to put it first. Preferably some place with water so it's functional. Arsé-kun: Kay: ..... Like I said. Pardon the literal-minded moron. Sheepy: Morty: Ignore him. Got it. Sheepy: Morty: I can't actually stop you, so go ahead. Sheepy: Grif: Why make threats if you won't go through with them? Arsé-kun: Kay: Intimidation. Sheepy: Grif: Really... Sheepy: Grif: Is he intimidating? Sheepy: Grif: Should I feign fear so he doesn't feel bad? Sheepy: Grif: Knives mean nothing to me. Sheepy: Morty: What? Most people are frightened by the concept of being stabbed... Sheepy: Grif: If you stab me I will take your knife as a finder's fee. Sheepy: Morty:...Just go ahead and get it over with. Arsé-kun: Kay: Knew you'd understand! We shouldn't be long unless this moron gets distracted or stabbed. Sheepy: Grif: I believe in you not to get distracted, and if someone tries to stab you I will simply snap their spine. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... You, moron, not me! Sheepy: Grif: You've given me a nickname... Sheepy: Grif: I've never been given a nickname before. Arsé-kun: *Kay just gives a "Look what I'm dealing with" look to Morty.* Sheepy: Grif: Fine, I'll accept Moron as my new nickname. Good! I like how it sounds! Sheepy: Morty:...I'm sorry for you. Arsé-kun: Kay: This is what I'm living with. But it's still better than what you have! Sheepy: *Grif heads to talk to Garry. Morty seems anxious and doesn't let Grif out of his sight.* Arsé-kun: *This is fair, and Kay doesn't either* Sheepy: Grif: Hello. Sheepy: Grif: My quest has brought me to you. Sheepy: *Grif looks away from Garry and starts scrolling through his quest log* Arsé-kun: *Garry barely glances at him, being mid-sewing. Sewing machine sounds do not help at all here.* Sheepy: Grif: [QUEST: The Cost(ume) of Being Popular - "Locate the Costume Maker."] Sheepy: Grif:...There's no name, so you must just be a faceless NPC. Arsé-kun: Garry: *he finishes the sleeve he was working on, and turns off the sewing machine* Pardon? I wasn't able to hear you clearly. If you're here for the costumes, I've got a sign in sheet somewhere around here. ^^ *and then he resumes sewing* Sheepy: *Grif goes looking for the sign in sheet.* Sheepy: *There's a doll on the sign in sheet, holding the pen. It looks friendly, as if it's greeting those who look upon it. Yet, something about its design choices put off bad vibes. Its gaze almost feels as though it's attached to a living creature.* Arsé-kun: *Kay perceives none of this, plucks the pen from the doll and signs in* Sheepy: Grif:....! Arsé-kun: Kay: He said to sign in. What, did I hurt the doll's feelings now too? *but he DOES put the pen back in the dolls arms. plop.* Sheepy: Grif: Kay, get away from that! *Grif jumps to Kay's side and throws the doll before getting into a combat position* Arsé-kun: *Garry notices something whizzing past and stops to figure out what just happened* Sheepy: Morty: You don't throw other people's property!! Arsé-kun: Garry: What... What WAS that? Sheepy: Morty: He threw one of those dolls. Arsé-kun: Garry: O-oh, never mind, throw it as much as you want! *VISIBLE DISCOMFORT* Sheepy: Grif: "One of"...?! You have more? Arsé-kun: Garry: My older brother makes them. They're harmless, b-but... Sheepy: Grif: It's alive, don't you know that? Arsé-kun: Garry: I was really hoping people wouldn't know that...!!! I don't like knowing that! Sheepy: Morty: I didn't tell him, so maybe rumors-- Sheepy: Grif: I didn't need to be told. Arsé-kun: Kay: Can we move on? We didn't come to discuss things we don't like. Sheepy: Grif: But my job is to protect people, and those things feel dangerous. Arsé-kun: Kay: Then deal with it somewhere else. I'll do the business half, you do what you do. Sheepy: Grif: I see... A side quest... Sheepy: Grif: Do you want them off your hands? Arsé-kun: Garry: Absolutely, yes please! Just don't, uh, don't throw them like that... It upsets them a-a lot.. Sheepy: Grif: So I was right about it not being harmless. Arsé-kun: Garry: It makes them upset and then I get upset... B-but anyway! Sheepy: Grif: [QUEST ADDED: All Dolled Up] Sheepy: *Grif collects the doll he tossed. +1 doll obtained!* Sheepy: Grif: I'll use it to track down what's giving them life. Sheepy: Grif: But I'll probably need a few. Arsé-kun: Garry: They're everywhere... Ssooooooo that shouldn't be hard! Okay, have fun, bye! Sheepy: Grif: Thank you. *he goes hunting for the dolls. goodbye grif* Arsé-kun: *and with Grif out of scene, the business major can work with the fashion designer in peace. Feat. Morty* Sheepy: *Morty seems unsure about what just happened...* Arsé-kun: Kay: He's like that. His job is getting rid of harmful stuff or whatever, so no shit he's gonna be tough as nails and dumb as them too. Sheepy: Morty: He scares me. Arsé-kun: Kay: I could tell you what I got to watch him do earlier. I hated every second of it. Sheepy: Morty: Oh boy. What did he do? Sheepy: Morty: For them to hire someone like that to protect us... They're getting desperate, aren't they. Arsé-kun: Kay: Obliterated an undead. In one shot, even! Sheepy: Morty:...?! Arsé-kun: Kay: ... I mean, it was an old one and fragile, so like? Maybe that's normal? Arsé-kun: *Kay thinks about it. Kay proceeds to fuckin regret that decision* Arsé-kun: Kay: BUT ENOUGH ABOUT THAT Sheepy: Morty:...But even so, I threatened him without a second thought. Arsé-kun: Kay: He doesn't go after people. Not in the job description. Sheepy: Morty: If he did... well, I doubt it'd be pretty. Arsé-kun: Kay: If he did, I'd have already thrown beer bottles at his dumb face. Sheepy: Morty: I know someone else who's good at that. Arsé-kun: Kay: Kick his ass. Sheepy: Morty: I want to but apparently that's mean. Arsé-kun: Kay: So is throwing bottles! Sheepy: Morty: But I thought you did it? Arsé-kun: Kay: Do you know how much of a pain in the ass it is to clean glass out of things? Sheepy: Morty: Yes. Sheepy: Morty: It's awful. Actually, next time Har breaks something, I'll make him clean it up. Sheepy: Morty: He might come crying and complaining to me. I'll just do it myself. Arsé-kun: Kay: Tell him if he doesn't, I'll do it but I'll also take his wallet. The entire thing. Sheepy: Morty: Maybe I'll bribe him to go to the AA. Is that where alcoholics go to become sober? Arsé-kun: Kay: Only if they want to. Sheepy: Morty: It's not exactly fun going out to drink with co-workers and having to listen to someone ramble for over an hour about how much they adore their husband before they pass out and being the one to have to drag them home to said husband, only to have to speak to him after that. Sheepy: Morty: That's how the last outing went. Arsé-kun: Kay: Sounds like a drag. Have you tried drinking alone and putting movies on loud enough to drown out the idiots? Sheepy: Morty: No. Arsé-kun: Kay: Great, it gets depressing. Sheepy: Morty: I can't comprehend how people could find it fun. Arsé-kun: Garry: Me neither! Sheepy: Morty: Well, at least we can go out and do more fun things. Sheepy: Morty: Like... Eh... Arsé-kun: *no one has any input. no one goes out if they can help it. introverts.* Sheepy: Morty: Well, you know what people do when they go out. Arsé-kun: Garry: We all understood what you meant! Sheepy: Morty: If it weren't for the path, there'd be more we could do. Sheepy: Morty: Becoming a detective was a bad choice. People commit crimes but they're dull ones, like littering and selling shoes illegally. Arsé-kun: Kay: What, do you wanna look at dead bodies? Sheepy: Morty: I was hoping to have something of interest to do on my job. Arsé-kun: Kay: One of my professors is a Coroner, probably wouldn't mind help figuring out what happened to people? It'd be better than whatever shit the fuckin' idiot drags you into. Sheepy: Morty: I'm interested. Arsé-kun: *Garry expresses his discomfort by turning the sewing machine back on* Sheepy: Morty: Who is it? Arsé-kun: *Kay gives him the required information! yaaaay* Sheepy: Grif: Hello, everyone. Arsé-kun: Kay: Welcome back. We talked business and about the undead you obliterated. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. That. Herb makes them too weak. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Eh?? Sheepy: Grif: They should be stronger with what I've given him, if he uses it properly. Sheepy: Morty:...What're you going on about? Arsé-kun: Kay: Beats me. Sheepy: Grif: What, you think the dead body on his table getting up is a coincidence? Arsé-kun: Kay: Weird shit happens all the time, how should I know and why should I give a shit? Sheepy: Grif: He made it. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... But spooooky things happen in the middle of Nowhere, and it's up to Courage to save his new home! *he's goofing off. ignore him* Sheepy: Morty:...A coroner... revives dead bodies. ...Is that where the bodies in the morgue have been disappearing to...?! Arsé-kun: Garry: That sounds like it'll get out of hand! Sheepy: Grif: Speaking of that, I found one to donate to the morgue. Do you usually have dead bodies in your dorm? That's not sanitary. Arsé-kun: Garry: .... Does he look like me at all? Because if so, he's not dead. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Garry: ... *he sighs* I'll deal with him. Pardon me! *he excuses himself* Sheepy: Grif: I see. When humans sleep their pulse stops. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... No, I think that's just him. Sheepy: Grif: When my dad sleeps his pulse stops. Arsé-kun: Kay: Which. Sheepy: Grif: The flirty one. Arsé-kun: Kay: That sounds like a personal problem. Sheepy: Grif: Does my pulse stop when I sleep? Arsé-kun: Kay: How the fuck should I know? Do you think I check?? Sheepy: Grif: Maybe it does. Arsé-kun: *one of the dolls pops its head over Grif's shoulder. what is happening in this thread?* Sheepy: Morty: ! Sheepy: Grif: Behold. My new friend. Arsé-kun: Kay: You're keeping it??? Sheepy: Grif: It's my friend. Sheepy: Grif: We've come to an agreement. Sheepy: Grif: It'll be my friend if I'm its friend. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Well, better that then Fou. Sheepy: Grif: You're very mean to Fou. Arsé-kun: Kay: I don't like him. Sheepy: Grif: In the long run it'd best benefit you to treat him with respect. Arsé-kun: Kay: I do. If I wasn't I'd kick his tiny little shitty ass. Sheepy: Grif: Hmmm... Well, if you kick him, I'll kick you. I don't like to see animals get hurt. Arsé-kun: Kay: I'm obviously not going to. Bedi would hate me if I did. Sheepy: Grif: That's a worse punishment than me kicking you. Arsé-kun: Kay: You understand. Sheepy: Grif: So emotional responses are more effective than simple "eye for an eye"... Sheepy: Grif: My ability to dish out punishment has leveled up to 2. Arsé-kun: Kay: Why is that even a stat??? Sheepy: Grif: It's a joke. Sheepy: Grif: I tried very hard to make you laugh. Sheepy: Grif:.... Ha. Ha. Ha. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Hah. Sheepy: Grif: Only one... Sheepy: Grif: I'm only supposed to laugh once at a joke. Fine, I'll force only one laugh from now on instead of three. Sheepy: Grif: Tell a joke, you'll see. Arsé-kun: Kay: Are you sure? I'm not the guy people usually ask to tell jokes. Sheepy: Grif: It's fine. You'll be unfunny to me either way. Arsé-kun: Kay: Fine, fine. What's green, has four legs, and would kill you if it fell from a tree? Sheepy: Grif: My dad. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... See, that's just true. Arsé-kun: Kay: But no. It's a pool table. Sheepy: Grif: Pool tables are usually white with umbrellas. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... A billiards table. Sheepy: Grif: But I never go to the pool. I can't swim very well. Arsé-kun: *Kay's joke fell flat...* Sheepy: Grif: I've heard humans wear outfits at the pool to improve swimming capability. Sheepy: Grif: They're called swim suits. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, that's not wrong. Sheepy: Grif: Last time I wore a suit, though, the jacket was too tight for swimming. Arsé-kun: Kay: I'd laugh if I knew you weren't being serious. Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Never mind. We did our business here. Sheepy: Grif: Where do we go next? Arsé-kun: Kay: Home I guess. Sheepy: Grif: Great. Arsé-kun: *in the far background, outside this room, Garry being helped by several dolls to move someone else. Garry is not happy about any part of this situation what-so-ever* Sheepy: Grif: I know a big quest is coming soon so I should bond and relax when I can. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... And whatever that means. Let's just go already. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: *Meanwhile, there's a dead body on the ground.* Arsé-kun: *As you can see, Garry didn't make much progress, even with the dolls. They got bored anyway and fucked off. Helpful. Anyway being garry is suffering* Sheepy: *The body slightly shifts and starts to move slowly, beginning to breathe more noticably. Maybe it wasn't dead after all?* Arsé-kun: *Garry heaves a relieved sigh and plops down next to it. Stress.jpeg* Sheepy: *The body's eyes open. Hello! Look who's awake!* Sheepy: Toa: ...I-I think I landed wrong on the way down. Arsé-kun: Garry: It looked like it hurt.. Sheepy: Toa: It did. Uh...but good thing I didn't hit my face. Arsé-kun: Garry: We can't afford new glasses again.. Sheepy: Toa: More importantly, if I hurt my face, I'll raise questions at my next live. Arsé-kun: Garry: Why is that the priority...?? Sheepy: Toa: I don't want my manager to yell at me... Arsé-kun: Garry: That's fair.... She's scary. Sheepy: Toa: Maybe she can frighten the curse away. Arsé-kun: Garry: If only it was that easy... Sheepy: Toa: At this point, I don't know who to go to about it... *he starts getting up* Owowow... Arsé-kun: Garry: Don't strain yourself! *he helps Toa up* Sheepy: Toa: Unfortunately, even if we could ask the source... I have a feeling he wouldn't help. Arsé-kun: Garry: He'll just say "I found the secret to eternal life!" and then send me four more dolls and a box of rotten chocolate. Sheepy: Grif: Tell me of the source. I can't let someone who curses people remain unpunished, and I can't let dangerous curses last. Sheepy: Toa:?! Eavesdropping i-is, well...rude! Ah... but you've heard all this, and I can't really let it get out... Y-you could cause bad rumors, and then she'd yell at me... Sheepy: Grif: I don't know nor care who you are, nor do I partake in rumormongering. Arsé-kun: Kay: And if anyone tells rumors, it's going to be me. But he's interested now, so it's your problem! Sheepy: Toa: P-please don't...! Sheepy: Toa: What do I need to do for you not to spread rumors...? Sheepy: Grif: My Threat level has gone up. I can now inflict fear in people with the Cowardly trait as a Passive. Sheepy: Toa: eh? Sheepy: Grif:.......... It's a joke. Sheepy: Toa: Wh- Sheepy: Grif: My Threat level was already high enough to frighten people just by being near them. Arsé-kun: Kay: ..... Anyway, I already overhear people calling you Danny Phantom so I don't need to do anything. Sheepy: Toa: Yes... I know. Sheepy: Toa: I thought you heard more... Sheepy: Grif: I'm about to. Arsé-kun: Garry: W-wait, that's extremely threatening! Sheepy: Grif: What? It's the truth. I asked a question so you have to answer it. Sheepy: Toa: Th-that's not how it works!! Sheepy: Grif: It's my job. If you don't tell me the source of the curse, the source could end up hurting others. Your behavior implies you're close to the source, making it all the more important I find them, because if they're willing to hurt someone they're close to, everyone could be in danger. Arsé-kun: Garry: Well.... I don't think he was trying to hurt anyone, but.... Sheepy: Grif: It doesn't matter. Arsé-kun: *Garry looks to Toa for his approval* Sheepy: Toa:...I don't think we have much choice but to tell him. Arsé-kun: Garry: Yeah. I thought as much... Arsé-kun: Garry: It's our older brother. He sends the dolls too. He's trapped in his museum off the path. One of the times we tried to get him out, he'd started declaring he'd *airquotes* "Found the secret to eternal life". Along with, uh, a wh-whole m-mummy chasing us around, he did... Whatever caused this? We call it a curse but we don't know what it is... Sheepy: Grif: Oh. You got lucky. Sheepy: Grif: You could have died in a terrible way thanks to that mummy. Arsé-kun: Kay: Eh... You know about it? Sheepy: Grif: It's the power of being so ugly that everyone who looks upon you partakes in rigor mortis but simultaneously becomes immortal. Sheepy: Grif: Like Medusa but you aren't put out of your misery. Sheepy: Grif: But if he's with the mummy, I'm shocked he's still... Eh... Sheepy: Grif: I won't question your decision to go off the path, but rather than doing it yourself, you should just find someone to help you next time. Fine, you want to drag him out? I'll go grab him Sheepy: Grif: Quest accepted. ... Quest accepted. Sheepy: Grif:....... Arsé-kun: *no quest pop-up* Sheepy: *Grif shoves his hand into Kay's pocket and takes out his phone* Arsé-kun: Kay: Do you MIND?! Sheepy: Grif: No, not at all, thank you. Sheepy: Grif: Dad, where's the quest pop up? Arsé-kun: Yog: ... What? I'm playing Doom Eternal right now. What quest? You weren't due for one until tomorrow I thought. Sheepy: Grif: I unlocked a quest. Arsé-kun: Yog: Whhh... Where are you? Sheepy: Grif: Zann Building. The fine arts one. Sheepy: Grif: I unlocked a quest to find an older brother in a museum Arsé-kun: Yog: Huh?! Are you?? I can't... Something isn't... ... Do me a favor. Sheepy: Grif: Yes? Arsé-kun: Yog: Stay where you are and that is an order! Sheepy: Grif:...?! Arsé-kun: Yog: If I can't see you, then only one of three things is happening. All three are exceedingly dangerous. I'll put the quest in for you, however! Stay put until I get back to you! heepy: Grif: Ah... I'm in danger. *Grif has stiffened up some...* Fine, I'll stay put. But what if something attacks? Arsé-kun: Yog: Retreat. Do not engage. Arsé-kun: Garry: ... Something up? Arsé-kun: Kay: Y... Yes? This doesn't look normal.. Sheepy: Grif: There's people here. In that case, who do I prioritize? Myself or them? Arsé-kun: Yog: I can revive you. I can't revive them. Sheepy: Grif: Fine, I'll keep them safe in that case. Sheepy: Grif: Something is wrong. We're staying here for now. Sheepy: Grif: If you attempt leaving, everyone will be endangered. Arsé-kun: Garry: I... I don't very much like the sound of that..! Sheepy: Grif: That's your problem. Arsé-kun: Garry: .... *he shudders, and then takes Toa's glasses and puts them on* Sheepy: Grif: I'll keep everyone as safe as I can. Arsé-kun: *Quest Added: "A Knight at the Museum"!* Sheepy: Grif: Quest accepted. Sheepy: Grif: If you die anyway, well, so sorry. Arsé-kun: Kay: That's not very helpful! Sheepy: Toa: B-but we're on the path... Why would anything happen...? Sheepy: Grif: They just simply said no to the rules and went onto the path anyway. Arsé-kun: Garry: Th-that's not comforting..! Sheepy: Grif: It's fine. Someone as powerful as that won't give you the time to know you're dead. Sheepy: Toa: That.. that isn't reassuring at all...! Sheepy: Grif: I understand. My view of mercy is that the cruelest thing you can do is steal someone's life. That's why to be merciful I don't deal instantly fatal blows. Arsé-kun: *Garry has started clinging to Toa. He's shaking.* Sheepy: *Toa wants to reassure Garry, but he's too scared to...* Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Y'all wanna get drinks after this? Sheepy: Grif: Did you know? Sheepy: Grif: When I drink, I get unpredictable. Arsé-kun: Kay: Okay, so not you. Sheepy: Toa: ...I-I'm almost considering it. Arsé-kun: Garry: I-I can't, I've got so much work to do... Sheepy: Grif: My drunk type is "emotional". Do you usually know my feelings? Can you see them on my face? Arsé-kun: Kay: That's a hard sometimes. Now is not one of those times. Sheepy: Grif: If I got drunk, you'd know. Sheepy: Grif: Also, alcohol reduces one's ability to react to pain, so I might end up tanking too much and then Dad would have to revive me. Sheepy: Grif: Ah, but I guess I just accepted a new quest. Sheepy: Grif: Maybe next time. Sheepy: *Meanwhile, outside...* Arsé-kun: *Outside is nothing that strange, honestly. Just some dude trying to enjoy sweets on his downtime. If he could open the wrapper. A relatable struggle.* Sheepy: Morty:...Do you need help with that? Arsé-kun: Aza: That would be... Greatly appreciated, yes. Sheepy: Morty: *he comes over and opens up the wrapper, passing it back upon opening it* Sheepy: Morty: There you go. Arsé-kun: Aza: Thank you. Sheepy: Morty: No problem. Arsé-kun: Kay: *peering out a window and watching this* ... Grif, do you see anything dangerous? I'm not seeing anything. Sheepy: Grif: *he's also staring out the window* Oh. I only see the angry man interacting with Grandpa. Very nice of him. Grandpa gets lonely sometimes. Sheepy: Grif: Of course, I suppose that he has to be nice. Sheepy: Grif: He wouldn't like the results otherwise. Arsé-kun: Kay: Why is your family so fucked up? Sheepy: Grif: Define. Sheepy: Grif: Too many potential definitions. Please be clearer. Sheepy: Grif: If it's the one I'm assuming, they don't have any concern for humans generally past seeing them as either strange creatures or playthings. Arsé-kun: Kay: Except your dad, maybe, apparently. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: And my other dad. He likes princesses the most but most humans are fine in his eyes. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Hey, speaking of them-- Since one's immortal and the other maybe is, are you? Sheepy: Grif: Uh... Sheepy: Grif: My job is to protect humans. If I die, I can't do that. Sheepy: Grif: I always do my job, so if Death came to me I would simply tell him no. Sheepy: Grif: But Dad knows better than I do. You can ask him for a better answer. Sheepy: Grif: But the answer I think is yes...? Arsé-kun: Kay: Okay. Cool. Sheepy: Grif: You find me... cool? *Grif appears a little flustered.* I'm not a cool enough knight yet for this... Arsé-kun: Kay: You punched a zombie. It was extremely cool. Arsé-kun: *Kay has changed the subject...* Sheepy: Grif: I can punch you, too, to show you how it feels. Arsé-kun: Kay: I like staying alive. Sheepy: Grif: I've heard it's a good song. I haven't heard it. Arsé-kun: Kay: That too. But if you punched me like you did that zombie, I would simply die. Sheepy: Grif: Oh. Don't do that. It's bad for your health. Sheepy: Grif: Do you eat enough nutrients? If you eat specific nutrients, your HP stat will go up. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... ... Sheepy: Grif: I focus on SPD and ATK, but HP and DEF are important too. Arsé-kun: Kay: You do know most people aren't like you, right? We can't actively raise "stats" or anything. Sheepy: Grif: Eh? Sheepy: Grif: Why not? Arsé-kun: Kay: Sure, I can say "I want to be able to lift more weight" but I can't just... It doesn't work like that. You're the only one with the stats screen. Sheepy: Grif: What? You have stats, too. Sheepy: Grif: I can see the stats of anyone in my party. Arsé-kun: Kay: But I can't just... Look at them and decide "Hm I should do this thing to raise a stat"-- What? Sheepy: Grif: I can see the stats of party members. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Can I see? Sheepy: [Kay joined the party! Dahdahdahdaaaaah! Grow a stronger bond to unlock better stat boosts and combo attacks!] Sheepy: Grif: *he brings up his menu to show Kay his stats* Sheepy: Grif: Behold. Stats. They have a class on stats as well. Sheepy: Grif: It's called statistics. Arsé-kun: *Kay ignores that comment in favor of looking over his stats.* Sheepy: Grif: By taking action, you can improve your stats. Everything can increase your stats, even if the change isn't noticable at first. Sheepy: Grif: However, I've heard that if humans don't use a certain stat for a while, it goes down. Sheepy: Grif: Humans should be more careful not to misplace their stat points. Sheepy: Grif:...I need help learning how to swim, but... Sheepy: Grif: I feel anxious going into the water knowing I could drown, completely out of my control. Arsé-kun: Kay: Didn't I tell you start small with that? Sheepy: Grif: I find the concept of swimming scary. Arsé-kun: Kay: But you can sit in a bathtub. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: That's your start. Sheepy: Grif: If it's warm, I may fall asleep. Arsé-kun: Kay: Theeeen don't do that. Sheepy: Grif: Being nice and warm and then falling asleep is nice. Arsé-kun: Kay: I gotta agree with that one. Sheepy: Grif: But apparently if you do that in the bath you'll drown. Arsé-kun: Kay: Then don't make it warm. It's not like we'll have hot water for showers often now that Bedi's living with us. Bastard uses it all. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... *he looks back at his stats and sighs a little* But my intelligence isn't as good as I thought it was. I thought I was doing good... Sheepy: Grif: Ah. Your Int... Sheepy: Grif: It's one point higher than mine. Sheepy: Grif: Worry not. We're two pods in a pea, you and me. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Right, you can read, just not English. Yeah, that makes sense I suppose. Sheepy: Grif: My intelligence is mostly oriented towards picking up skills quickly and retaining them rather than learning knowledge and applying it. Sheepy: Grif: We can work on growing smarter together. Okay? Sheepy: Grif: You may gain more INT by studying more, although I've heard that certain things can lower it. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, okay... Has your dad said anything about whatever's going on yet? Sheepy: Grif: Dad? Can you see anything? I think it's Grandpa blocking your vision again. Arsé-kun: Yog: *from Kay's phone* It is him. He seems to be in a decent mood... But I never enjoy risking it. Sheepy: Grif: He has candy, but he's not eating the good part. Arsé-kun: Kay: You don't eat the paper wrapper, you dolt, that's the container. Sheepy: Grif: I like the paper wrapper. Arsé-kun: Kay: ...... Well, okay. Sheepy: Grif: You haven't had it? Arsé-kun: Kay: No, because I don't eat paper or plastic. Sheepy: Grif: You should experiment more. Arsé-kun: Kay: I like not destroying my organs, thanks. Arsé-kun: Kay: I. .... Okay, touché, but that isn't the reason for that. Sheepy: Grif: If you destroy your organs, I probably won't donate mine to you. Sheepy: Grif: I'll see how I feel right then and there. It depends. Although, maybe you'd die. Arsé-kun: Kay: I'd probably die. Sheepy: Grif: Then perish. Sheepy: Grif: Ah, but you can't just grow them back, right? Arsé-kun: Kay: No, Grif, I can't. Sheepy: Grif: Why are you so fragile? Arsé-kun: Kay: Because most humans are. Sheepy: Grif:.....Hmm. Sheepy: Grif: That's too bad. I guess we can't stay party members if you'll get hurt when you take damage. Arsé-kun: Kay: Last I checked, taking damage usually means getting hurt, dimwit. Sheepy: Grif: I just heal. Arsé-kun: Kay: Cool story bro. *he's finally getting annoyed.* Sheepy: Grif: You're too easily impressed. Arsé-kun: Kay: ....... Can we leave yet?? SSheepy: Grif: You're too easily impressed. Arsé-kun: Kay: ....... Can we leave yet?? Arsé-kun: Kay: Uugggghhhhhh! Sheepy: Grif: If you leave and there's a danger out there, you'll face it alone. I have orders. I won't ignore them. Arsé-kun: Kay: What, we can't just go out the back or side and go around this?? Sheepy: Grif: Dad said to stay put. Sheepy: Grif: I won't ignore his orders. Arsé-kun: Kay: If your dad told you to end yourself, would you?? Jeez! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: Have you NO self-preservation?? Are you stupid???? Sheepy: Grif:...? Sheepy: Grif: If he thinks I should, I should. He cares about people, so it'd be with the interest of humans in mind. Sheepy: Grif: Didn't you hear? He basically already told me to do that in the situation of it being you or me. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Gimme my phone back. Sheepy: Grif: *he gives Kay his phone back* Are you angry? Arsé-kun: Kay: Almost. Arsé-kun: Kay: [text: to Bedi] I need to scream into the void can I borrow you for like ten minutes Sheepy: Bedi: [text: to Kay] Yes, go ahead!! Arsé-kun: Kay: [text: to Bedi] JESUS FUCKING CHRIST your cousin has the self preservation of a lifeboat on a bed of sharpened nails, good fucking god, put some thought into what ur doing for five goddamn minutes you stupid bitch motherfucker but wait im not d- [message cuts off] Sheepy: Bedi: [text: to Kay] Kay? Arsé-kun: Kay: [text: to Bedi] -one yet! If this bastard is unaging bc of his dumb parents then either I'd die on him and thad fuckin suck big ass or he'll die bc hes a stupid bitch and thats a load of horse fucking shit id rather fuck a bowling ball Arsé-kun: Kay: [text: to Bedi] Shit feels pointless, I'm impatient, he's dumb as hell, and I'm stuck in Zann bc his orb dads like OOOO THERES A BAD I CANT SEE ONE GODDAMN THING OH NO and im dying i do not want to be here i need a fucking adult Sheepy: Bedi: [text: to Kay] If you enjoyed the time spent, it wasn't pointless! But do you want me to head over? I'm sorry. He can be a handful sometimes. Arsé-kun: Kay: [text: to Bedi] I want you to, but don't. You're not allowed in dangerous situations, remember? Fuck you. Sheepy: Bedi: [text: to Kay] You're in danger?! Hold on, I'm coming. Arsé-kun: Kay: [text: to Bedi] NO! DON'T YOU DARE YOU FUCK Sheepy: Bedi: [text: to Kay] Fine, fine. Then what should I do? Arsé-kun: Kay: [text: to Bedi] Ask the pisswizard to come pick us up or something. Just bypass the entire whatever's happening outside. I still don't see anything bad but APPARENTLY there is Arsé-kun: Kay: [text: to Bedi] but jeez ur almost as bad as Grif on this front, no wonder you're related Sheepy: Bedi: [text: to Kay] He's Merlin with an M, but you got two letters right. Arsé-kun: Kay: Well, I can't judge you for being stupid on one front anymore. I told Bedi it was dangerous and the first fucking thing he said was "I'M COMING". He's not, but fuck you guys are bad at this. Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: Kay: No. Self. Preservation. Sheepy: Grif: So if you're to die, you want me to watch? Sheepy: Grif:.... Arsé-kun: Kay: That is not what I said. Arsé-kun: Kay: But don't charge in if you don't need to. Idiot. Sheepy: Grif: If someone's life is on the line, I will always charge in. Arsé-kun: Kay: Like I said, no wonder you two are related. Sheepy: Grif: No. He and I are different. Arsé-kun: Kay: He did it for an animal. You probably would too. The only difference is you'd win. Sheepy: Grif: And if I didn't, I'd just get up again. Sheepy: Grif: Dad will revive me until I'm not needed anymore. If I die permanently, it's because nobody needs me. Arsé-kun: Kay: So never, ok, gotcha. Sheepy: Grif: Hm? Sheepy: Grif: I'd hope one day they don't... Arsé-kun: Kay: Maybe not for this, but who knows? Sheepy: Grif: I'll always be happy ro help, but to become a crutch... Arsé-kun: Kay: Idiot. Moron. Do I have to spell it out for you? You can't have friends if you are dead. Sheepy: Grif: Uh... Sheepy: Grif: I have to protect my friends. Arsé-kun: Kay: How do you do that if you're dead? Sheepy: Grif: I can't. But I won't die for real until I'm no longer needed. If my friends need me, I'll stay alive. Sheepy: Grif: What, do you know someone who needs me? Arsé-kun: Kay: That's not what I was.... I was being figurative... Arsé-kun: *kay gets Shifty* Sheepy: Grif: My empathy stat is low. Arsé-kun: Kay: no shit. Sheepy: Grif: I have difficulty knowing wheb people need help or not. So I always try to help. Arsé-kun: *As Grif says this, Kay can watch out the window as Aza seems to notice something, rears up a MASSIVE semi-corporeal tentacle from who knows where, and swats Merlin back into this realm. No gnats allowed.* Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Hey, I just saw someone get tentacled into the ground, they might need that help. Sheepy: Grif:...! Sheepy: Grif: *he appears conflicted...* Arsé-kun: Kay: ... But yeah, I see why we don't go out now. Sheesh. Sheepy: *Grif finally decides that saving lives is a priority and opens the window, jumping through!* Arsé-kun: Kay: WAIT NOW YOU TAKE ACTION Sheepy: Grif: *he rushes over to Merlin and tries to help him up* Sheepy: Grif: You're unhurt, aren't you? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Seems I've been acquainted with the ground against my will but otherwise? I think I'm ok. Sheepy: Grif: Good. But you could've been... Sheepy: Grif: Grandpa, you could've hurt him! He's fragile! Arsé-kun: Aza: ... Hm? Isn't everything? Sheepy: Grif: Yes, but them even moreso. They can't grow things back. Their damage can be permanent. Sheepy: Grif: You need to be more gentle with them. Okay? Arsé-kun: Aza: What did I even hit? A shoggoth? *he shifts his bangs (finally) for a quick peek* Arsé-kun: *something, somewhere, explodes. but thats probably not here* Sheepy: Grif: You hit this human. Arsé-kun: Aza: unfortunate. Sheepy: Grif: He might look similar to me but you can't be rough with him like you can with me. He's weak. Arsé-kun: *Merlin is slightly offended but does not comment* Sheepy: Grif: He was worried about you potentially accidentally hurting the humans inside so he came to bring them home with him. Arsé-kun: Aza: Perhaps do not try to whizz past me as the Shan already do. Sheepy: Grif: He was just concerned. Uncle's been tormenting people recently so they feel unsafe. You're very powerful so you ended up scaring them more. Arsé-kun: Aza: I am just here. I already encountered one humanoid. I did well, perhaps. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. I watched you. You did a great job. Sheepy: Grif: Unfortunately, humans are cowardly. Sheepy: Grif: So you have to approach them carefully and be gentle. Sheepy: Grif: *clapping* Good job, Grandpa. Sheepy: Grif: I have a tip for you, too, Grandpa. I know how you can deal with bugs better than just swatting at them. Do you want to know how? Arsé-kun: Aza: Oh? I may not remember for long, but do share. Arsé-kun: *Merlin has exited scene. Goodbye.* Sheepy: Grif: Bug spray is great for dealing with bugs. Sheepy: Grif: I can write it down for you. Sheepy: Grif: You can also make Uncle remind you later. He likes helping you. Arsé-kun: Aza: Spray the Shan... Arsé-kun: Aza: ... What is "bug spray" made out of? Arsé-kun: Aza: Earth bugs? Sheepy: Grif: Poison. Sheepy: Grif: You can buy it at the store. Sheepy: Grif: It's poison that only hurts bugs. Arsé-kun: Aza: How specific. Humans do think of many things. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Much more than me. Sheepy: Grif: For example, they made a box that cooks things inside of it by spinning them. Arsé-kun: Aza: I have heard of this one! They refer to it as a MicroWave, but the only waves it uses are miniature radioactivity? There are no waves... Sheepy: Grif: Amazing. So that's how it works... But I didn't see any waves... Sheepy: Grif: Maybe they're so microscopic we can't see them. Arsé-kun: Aza: That would make sense. Sheepy: Grif: I can get you bug spray later. Arsé-kun: Aza: I would appreciate it before I attempt it myself. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. I'll do it. Quest accepted. Sheepy: Grif:..... Quest accepted. Sheepy: Grif: ...Hold on. Sheepy: *Grif moves away from Aza* Arsé-kun: *Quest Added: "They Shan't"* Sheepy: Grif: Quest accepted. Sheepy: Grif: Dad, it wasn't anyone malicious. It was just Grandpa getting a snack. Arsé-kun: Yog: .... Malicious and dangerous are not the same, Griflet. Sheepy: Grif: He's nice. I like him. Arsé-kun: Yog: As do I. But he is very dangerous nonetheless. He is completely unpredictable and I cannot see anything within a distance of him. Sheepy: Grif: I promised to buy him bug spray. Arsé-kun: Yog: .... For the Shan? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: I think he's just lonely. People should act nicer towards him. Arsé-kun: Yog: It is hard to when he can kill you on accident. Sheepy: Grif: That's fine. It's only on accident. Arsé-kun: Yog: If he kills you, I cannot revive you at all. Sheepy: Grif: That's troublesome... Sheepy: Grif: But might end up being useful information for an enemy, so it's useful information for me. Arsé-kun: Yog: I suppose that is fair. Now-- Fast Travel to the base is permitted within the campus. Would you like to beat your roommates back to their own dorm? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: *skyrim loading screen* Sheepy: Grif: I've returned. Sheepy: Grif: Now I wait for the others to. Arsé-kun: *Grif is promptly hit with the door* Sheepy: Grif:?! Arsé-kun: Kay: Don't stand in the goddamn doorw--- Eh? How the fuck did you get here first? Sheepy: Grif: Ah... it scared me... Arsé-kun: Merlin: *piping up from somewhere behind Kay* by all accounts, it doesn't make any sense! Sheepy: Grif: I fast travelled here. Arsé-kun: Kay: So bullshit. Aight. Sheepy: Grif: Fast travel. Sheepy: Grif: You're funny. You hear words and then use different words to describe the exact same thing. Sheepy: Grif: Wouldn't it just be simpler to use the original word? Arsé-kun: Kay: I'm calling it bullshit because I don't know or care how it works. Just don't stand in the doorway. Move. Sheepy: Grif: Hm... hmmm... Sheepy: Grif: So if I stand anywhere in the room other than the doorway, you'll like me more. Sheepy: *Grif backs up some before just standing there, staring at Kay* Sheepy: Grif: *staaaaaare* Arsé-kun: *Kay goes past him and beelines to the booze because of course he does. He's been through a lot today* Sheepy: Grif: *staaaaaaaaaaare* Arsé-kun: Merlin: *going past all this* Bedi, I got smacked out of a teleport by a giant tentacle today! ... No, I'm not hurt! Sheepy: Bedi: Did it apologize to you? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Nah. I startled the guy. That's on me I guess! Sheepy: Bedi: Sometimes you startle me, too. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oops! Sheepy: Bedi: It's fine. When I realize it's you, it makes me happy. Sheepy: Bedi: So it's okay if it's you who's startling me. Arsé-kun: Merlin: <3 Sheepy: Grif: I see. This is how you bond. Arsé-kun: *it is not.* Sheepy: Grif: Kay, try to scare me. Arsé-kun: Kay: I'm gonna drink to drown out the memories of anatomy class and also y'all flirting so, like, whatever, have fun, don't do anything so loudly that I can hear it in my room-- Arsé-kun: Kay: I can't scare you if you goddamn expect it, moron. Sheepy: Grif: Then we'll never bond, it seems. Sheepy: Grif: Okay, I'll act scared. Arsé-kun: Kay: That's not... Merlin, you're teaching him stupid crap. Fuck you. Sheepy: Grif: You teach me how to bond then. I want to be better friends with you. Arsé-kun: Kay: Did we not already have several experiences? Did they not count because you're an idiot? Sheepy: Grif: So we've bonded... Sheepy: Grif:..... Sheepy: Grif: So you like me better. Sheepy: Grif: Good. Good! Sheepy: Grif: That makes me happy! Arsé-kun: Kay: Good to know. Please shut up. I'm going to drink this entire bottle and then go to bed early because I can't do any more today. It's not happening. I refuse. Sheepy: Grif: You know what drink helps me go to sleep? Sheepy: Grif: Milk. I like ice cream, too. Arsé-kun: Kay: That gives me a better idea, actually. *Kay turns back to the kitchen. huh* Sheepy: Grif: ? I gave someone an idea... Sheepy: Grif: He must be desperate. Arsé-kun: *Kay returns some time later, passing through with what APPEARS to be a glass of milk. Do not be fooled- There is booze in there. He already stated his intention to drink booze.* Sheepy: Grif: It's milk. Good. Milk is nice. Arsé-kun: *Kay opts to not correct him. Good bye. Good night. fuck this.* Sheepy: Grif: Good night. Sleep tight. Don't look at the man in your doorway. Arsé-kun: Kay: Wh. What?? Sheepy: Grif: It's a joke. Arsé-kun: Kay: If you're in my doorway when I get up, I'm hitting you with the door. Sheepy: Grif: No, it wouldn't be me. Arsé-kun: Kay: Hey! I hate that. Sheepy: Grif: Don't worry. If he does anything I'll beat him up. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. I'll protect you so you can sleep well. Arsé-kun: *Kay finally exits scene after finger gunning towards Grif. Ayy. He is exhausted after today and rightfully so.* Sheepy: *you know who isn't? Bedi, who's still flirting with Merlin in the background* Arsé-kun: *Fou is staring towards the fourth wall like the camera in the office.* Sheepy: *help him* Arsé-kun: *this is the life he lives. tragic* Sheepy: *Grif goes to bed.* Arsé-kun: *YOU CANNOT SLEEP WHEN ENEMIES ARE NEARBY! ... Nah, just kidding.* Sheepy: *in the morning, Grif appears to be getting ready for an outing with little concern about how much noise he's making when people are trying to sleep.* Arsé-kun: Kay: Oi, keep it down..! Sheepy: Grif: Perfect timing. You, come here. Arsé-kun: Kay: Right now...? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. I need you. Arsé-kun: Kay: I just got up, Grif... *but he does go over* Sheepy: Grif: And not a minute too late. Sheepy: Grif: Or is it soon? Sheepy: Grif: Here, you take this. *he shoves a heavy bag into Kay's hands* Equip this. It's good for beginners. Arsé-kun: *Kay was not expecting it to be heavy and very nearly drops it* Sheepy: Grif: Don't drop it. Arsé-kun: Kay: Figuratively, you're the worst. Making me deal with this stuff minutes after getting up... *he's teasing. He does plop it down on a sofa so he doesn't have to hold it* Sheepy: Grif: Well, it's a gift. Sheepy: Grif: You're my party member. There's your equipment. I have a simple quest today. You're coming. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... *he sighs* Where are we headed, boss? Sheepy: Grif: The art museum that artist is trapped in. Sheepy: Grif: Its difficulty is very low, so it should be good for your first quest. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... ... You're lucky I already committed to following you to this. Let me do my business and I'll look into this. Sheepy: Grif: You might also have a better chance of getting him to willingly join us. Sheepy: Grif: I'll keep getting ready as you do. Go, go. Arsé-kun: *Kay goes to deal with his businesses. Aka anything required to get ready for the day* Sheepy: *Grif continues preparing in the meantime.* Arsé-kun: *Kay comes back about twenty minutes later, having put on sturdier clothes. ... This meaning a leather jacket and jeans, because most people don't own ARMOR.* Sheepy: *Grif has finished getting ready, donning his usual green armor. His face brightens up some upon seeing Kay!* Sheepy: Grif:...Good. You look nice. One day if you want to stay in my party you might need to have something safer to wear, and I'll get it for you. But for now, settle on that. Okay? Arsé-kun: Kay: I do? ... I mean, yeah, whatever, should I put on some elbow pads too while I'm at it? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: It's important to be well protected. Arsé-kun: *Kay gets elbow guards and comes back* Sheepy: Grif: Let's go. Arsé-kun: Kay: I guess! Not happy about any of this! Sheepy: Grif: Why? Arsé-kun: Kay: I haven't even TRIED to go offpath since.. A long time ago! I'm not looking forward to it! Sheepy: Grif: Then why come? Arsé-kun: Kay: Because SOMEONE has to make sure you don't die for some stupid idiot reason! Sheepy: Grif:...? Alright. Sheepy: Grif: Don't worry. I'll protect you. Sheepy: *Grif heads out to the museum!* Arsé-kun: *Kay follows him closely, hesitant and not happy abut this... But he already committed.* Sheepy: *Grif is keeping his guard up.* Arsé-kun: *Kay is still wary of this dark world of off the path, understandably.* Sheepy: Grif: The real danger is soon. Sheepy: Grif: I can heal any physical damage, so feel free to use me as a meat shield. Arsé-kun: Kay: Nnnnnoted.. Sheepy: Grif: But if it's attacking my mind, that may be more dangerous. My control is what keeps you safe. Sheepy: Grif: Squishy... Sheepy: Grif: You know what else is squishy? Arsé-kun: Kay: What? Sheepy: Grif: Slugs. Sheepy: Grif: So are the things that fascinate them. Sheepy: Grif: Soft, damp areas. Dead bodies. Moldy things. Sheepy: Grif: It grows on trees and sloths, too. You can get a pet one. Mold balls. Arsé-kun: Kay: Gross. Arsé-kun: *unsure if that is in reply to what Grif said, or a passing monstrosity* Sheepy: Grif: We're close by, too. Sheepy: Grif: Do you like art? Arsé-kun: Kay: Eh. Sheepy: Grif: It's very crunchy but usually too oily for my tastes. Arsé-kun: Kay: ..... *he just sighs. He doesn't care to reply to this when everything is dangerous and scary* Sheepy: Grif: I like the green ones. I'd like to eat a green art one day. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... What is wrong with you... Sheepy: Grif: I've heard you can buy them at the store but they're prickly. Sheepy: Grif: The last time I ate a prickly thing I got sick. Sheepy: Grif: Maybe you don't go out of your comfort zone enough. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... An artichoke..?? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: makes a lot more sense. Sheepy: Grif: It doesn't make me choke, so it's just art. Sheepy: Grif: But it makes my stomach hurt... Arsé-kun: Kay: .... You do cook it, right. Sheepy: Grif: Cook it? Sheepy: Grif: I'm supposed to cook it? Arsé-kun: Kay: .... I'll show you if we both survive this without lasting trauma. Sheepy: Grif: Trauma... Sheepy: Grif: Oh, we're here, the art museum. Arsé-kun: *The building is, of course, big. Bigger than the Zann building, and in much worse condition. Many parts are made of a pale, crumbling material that falls apart on touch. There are vines and less describable things almost entirely covering it, but the entryway is completely clear of hazards* Sheepy: Grif: How kind of them to make the entrance so easy to access. They must have known we were going to come. Arsé-kun: Kay: That, or it's used a lot... Hey, will it be less dark inside..? Sheepy: Grif: Are you scared of the dark? If you have a lighter, it might help with the darkness. Arsé-kun: Kay: Not the dark. Whatever is here I can't see... I really don't wanna be here.. Sheepy: Grif: We can go back. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... We're already here. I may as well trudge through the rest. Sheepy: Grif: If you say so. There may be a point of no return. Arsé-kun: Kay: There better be a return..! I have a test on Friday I have to take! Sheepy: Grif: I see. Even in there. Sheepy: Grif: As in, I will. Arsé-kun: Kay: Good for you! Sheepy: Grif: I'll protect you. Sheepy: Grif: Let's go in. Sheepy: Grif: I'll protect you. Sheepy: Grif: It's dark. Arsé-kun: Kay: No shit! Sheepy: Grif: We're looking for a human, right? Sheepy: Grif: All I see is paintings. No art. I was hungry, too. Arsé-kun: Kay: Art. Artwork. Artwork and Artichokes are completely different, you meandering doltazoid. Sheepy: Grif: Artwork... Sheepy: Grif:..... Sheepy: Grif: This stuff is beyond me. Sheepy: Grif: I'd prefer pictures of dragons. It's mostly pictures of women. Sheepy: Grif: I think it's creative that the walls start writing on themselves. It reminds me of the story with that king. Arsé-kun: Kay: Well, sucks for the writer! I can't see it, you can't read, and we're coming in there, jackhole! Arsé-kun: Kay: *he raises his voice a little more* My bud got a strict request from YOUR brothers to get your shit ass out of this dump! They have a whole fucking building to themselves, make that a museum people can actually go to instead of this dark bitch-ass motherfucker! Sheepy: *There's the sound of someone shifting towards them in the darkness...* Arsé-kun: Kay: You better fuckin' be human, or Grif's putting a hole through you..! Sheepy: ?: N-no...! I, I... D-don't hurt me! *they sound closeby!* Arsé-kun: Kay: If you're human, there's no intent to harm! Come out so I can maybe see you! *he points his equipped weapon in that vague direction. it is, unfortunately, a golf club.* Sheepy: *They approach.* Arsé-kun: *Kay squinte realle harde* Arsé-kun: *... He can't see shit still. He knows someone is there but it does not help his eyesight.* Sheepy: ?: I-I'm here...but...outside, it's... Arsé-kun: Kay: Better than this. Seriously, isn't this place full of eldritch fuckamacallits? *classy.* How's that any good? Go lock yourself in a public bathroom instead, that's still better than the chance of being offed for shits. Sheepy: ?: ....I-it's my domain...! *he raises his voice some* Here, d-death can't get me! This is a world without death! S-so...! Arsé-kun: Kay: bitch please Arsé-kun: Kay: Hey, speaking of that, your immortal brother keeps going ghost and it's very upsetting to him, can you deal with that? Sheepy: ?: I've given him the g-gift of immortality and he av...averted his eyes, so...so... Arsé-kun: Kay: Turning into a fucking ghost every five minutes is not immortality, you stain of cream cheese. Sheepy: ?: It isn't my problem! Arsé-kun: Kay: IT'S ABOUT TO BE! Sheepy: ?: No! No! L-leave me alone! If you try to hurt me, I-I'll...! Arsé-kun: Kay: I already said I'm not going to, idiot! Sheepy: Grif: Power going up. Health going down. Arsé-kun: Kay: I can't even fucking see this man. Grif, can you stop being useless in the sidelines for five goddamn minutes? Sheepy: Grif: If I hit him, he will certainly die. Arsé-kun: Kay: Do you have any useful tips and tricks to see in this shit realm of bullshit?? Sheepy: ?: No! No! I-I can't die! You can't make me! Sheepy: Grif: Use a lighter. Arsé-kun: Kay: That won't be jack shit. Sheepy: ?: ...! No fire! No fire! No fire! *They continue saying this, more panicked each time...* Arsé-kun: Kay: Hear that? No fire, Grif. Get a better tip. Sheepy: Grif: Use a flashlight. Arsé-kun: Kay: Do you HAVE one? Sheepy: Grif: No. Sheepy: ?: I'll.... I'll...! Arsé-kun: Kay: That's it. Let's get stupid. *he takes out his phone and turns on the light* Where are you, bitch boy? Sheepy: ?: Ah...ah...! *he cowers, covering his eyes. It's a messy, weak looking man who appears to not have eaten properly in a while...* Sheepy: Grif: Ah. That kinda hurts... Arsé-kun: Kay: Get wrecked, Grif, that sounds like a personal problem. Arsé-kun: Kay: Ey, art boy. You look like shit. What have you been eating, paint? Sheepy: ?: The rays of Heaven! Its gaze burns my soul! It will consume me whole! I don't want to die! *whimper* I-I don't... *sob* don't...don't...! Arsé-kun: Kay: You sound like you've been eating paint, too, goddamn. Arsé-kun: *But Kay does turn the light off and put his phone away. He knows where the man is now.* Sheepy: ?: Those wh-who break the rules of the museum will be punished! Reapers of Death will be slain! Death cannot grasp me here! This is a world that needs no death... This is a world that doesn't need YOU! Arsé-kun: Kay: Hey Grif? I don't think we're wanted here. Sheepy: *Something is quickly approaching, making scratching noises across the floor.* Sheepy: Grif: Boss is here. Arsé-kun: Kay: U-uh! That's your problem..! Sheepy: Grif: [TRASH is approaching!] Sheepy: *Something lunges at Kay!* Arsé-kun: *Whatever it is, it sure does hit him and HARD, easily slamming him to the floor. Kay was not remotely prepared for this!* Sheepy: *It claws at his face!* Arsé-kun: *Kay loses all of his built-up Bravado bonuses! Kay gains the Trauma status! Kay freezes up and can no longer take actions this turn!.... Kay was fine up until his face got hit. Too familiar of a feeling, I guess.* Sheepy: Grif: ...! Arsé-kun: Yog: *from Paimon* ... He is fine, Griflet. It was only five hit points of damage. Take on the boss and continue as intended. Sheepy: *An angry howl rings out near Kay before something tears the monster off of him! They pull back their claws, and-* Sheepy: *An angry howl rings out near Kay before something tears the monster off of him! They pull back their claws, and-* Arsé-kun: Yog: *from Paimon, with a rather urgent tone* Unnecessary action, Kay has not sustained any heavy damage! Over 3/4ths of his health remains! It is only a status condition, settle down now..! Sheepy: Grif: *He slowly puts his hand down before dropping it* Sheepy: *The creature skitters away...* Arsé-kun: Yog: Boss retreated. Sheepy: Grif: ...Good. Sheepy: ?: *he's fearfully trembling...* I-I'll... I'll go anywhere...just don't hurt me...! A demon...! A demon...! Here to drag me to the pits of...Ghhhk! *he collapses...* Arsé-kun: Yog: ... Target down. Urgency level reduced. Take your time. Sheepy: Grif: Right. *he approaches Kay and bends down* Are you okay? Arsé-kun: Kay: Yy-yeah, yeah, every, everything's fine! My eye stings a bit... *it's either a tear or a drop of blood rolling down his face. Maybe both!* My patch was ruined.. Sheepy: Grif: It stings... I'm sorry. I failed to protect you. Arsé-kun: Kay: Didn't do me much good with you standing over there..! Sheepy: Grif: I know. Arsé-kun: Kay: Moron. Bastard. Hold this ruined thing so I can wipe my face off. Sheepy: Grif: *he takes it* I won't make the same mistake again. Arsé-kun: Kay: Please don't..! I nearly relived my bad experience out there..! Sheepy: Grif: The next time something targets you, I'll...! Arsé-kun: Kay: Make sure I don't get hit after running my mouth? heepy: Grif: I'll tear them to shreds! Arsé-kun: *Kay flinches a little from volume* Arsé-kun: Kay: Could you not.... ... *Kay trails off and blinks. Blinks again. Looks around, seemingly confused* ... Hey Grif? Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: Kay: How.. How clear is this place to you..? Like, vision wise? Sheepy: Grif: Fairly clear. And yet, I just let it happen. Arsé-kun: Kay: Because my good eye couldn't see at all, but... Sheepy: Grif: It felt weak to me, and I thought you could gain useful experience... Arsé-kun: Kay: Grif, I can goddamn see you with my bad eye. Sheepy: Grif:...What? Sheepy: Grif: But, you're... Arsé-kun: Kay: I don't know! *he covers his good eye with his hand* And I can still see you! This would've been SO much better coming here..! Sheepy: Grif: I didn't know... Arsé-kun: Kay: Neither did I!!! Arsé-kun: Kay: Getting completely fucked up by a monster has it's perks??? Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: Kay: Didn't Merlin tell you already? I got fucked up by an offpath thing a long time ago. Could that be why...? Or is that too anime shojo hero nonsense? Sheepy: Grif: He did tell me. I don't get it... Sheepy: Grif: It's useful information. Arsé-kun: Kay: Whatever, I'll fuckin' take it! Beats being blind any day! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: *Logs updated!* Sheepy: Grif: Logs updated. Arsé-kun: Yog: Cut-time's up. Normal time resumed. Please return to your quest. Sheepy: Grif: Right. Sheepy: *Grif leaves Kay's side and lifts up the man like a sack of potatoes.* Arsé-kun: Kay: That... That also works. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: Is that all we needed to do? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: Let's head back. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Right, we gotta walk all the way back. Yech. Sheepy: Grif: Right. Sheepy: Grif: I'll keep you safe for real this time. Arsé-kun: Kay: Why don't you, um... *he sounds nervous* Start by telling me what to do ab-about THAT! Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: *he points to a distant entryway, where a humanoid(?) thing stands. The Mummy.* Sheepy: Grif:....! Sheepy: Grif: *he grabs Kay and starts running in the opposite direction* Arsé-kun: Kay: I dunno about you, b-bu---Oh okay! We're running! Okay, all right! Sheepy: Grif: I can't face it in my current state! Arsé-kun: Yog: That is correct! It is far too strong to be dealt with at this time! Retreat! Sheepy: Grif: Right! Arsé-kun: *they get the FUCK out of dodge.* Sheepy: Grif: Successfully escaped! Arsé-kun: Kay: Fuck that! Fuck that shit! Sheepy: Grif: Our quest is complete, let's just rush home! Arsé-kun: Kay: I'd like that! Sheepy: Grif: Drop this guy off on the way. Arsé-kun: Kay: Where??? Sheepy: Grif: The theater. Arsé-kun: *Fast travel enabled. However, a cutscene will play at the border. Do you wish to continue?* Arsé-kun: *"Yes" is automatically selected* Arsé-kun: *Fast Travel brings them Right to the edge of the off-path, letting them slam through and back onto the normal path. Griflet, being used to this, is fine. Kay proceeds to slam straight into something- or someONE- immediately after stumbling. It'll take him a moment to register vision, as one eye is more or less shutting down while the other adjusts to the natural daylight* Sheepy: Bedi: —Ah...! Sheepy: Grif: It’s you. Sheepy: Grif: Kay? Are you alright? Arsé-kun: Kay: You have GOT to warn me for that shit! Sorry, Bedi! .... Why the fuck are you here?! Sheepy: Bedi: Because I heard you were going off the path! What were you thinking...?! You could've died! I wasn't going to sit around and let that happen! *For once, Bedi isn't just grinning and bearing his feelings! Scary.* Arsé-kun: Kay: Someone had to go with this fucking idiot! You think I wanted to either?! You see anyone else willing to do it? Sheepy: Grif: Hmm, but usually I work alone... Sheepy: Grif:...Not that I disliked having a companion. Arsé-kun: Kay: If I come with you again for some insane fucking reason, I want a face covering. Sheepy: Bedi: You aren't some kind of babysitter! It's not your job to go out and watch over people! Why do you insist on being a helicopter mom only when it puts your life at risk?! You could die! And your presence there doesn't make a difference anyway! It just means more bodies in the end! Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh, like you haven't?! And excuse you, my being there helped the idiot get a man OUT so *ahem* *flips off Bedi* I did do something, thank you very much! At least I didn't lose a whole limb doing it! OH WAIT Sheepy: Bedi:...! Arsé-kun: Kay: And yeah, no shit. It sucked! It sucked ass! Arsé-kun: Kay: But after some of the dumb bitch shit this man's said? Yeah, no, he's not allowed to be alone anymore. Stupid bastard thinks dying is ok. Fucking bitch asshole. Sheepy: Bedi: *he clutches Airgetlam tightly with his other hand* I... If you weren't there, it would've ended the same way. Now you're just chasing after someone else to prove that isn't true. Arsé-kun: Kay: So I can't make up for being useless by helping to save someone? Aight! Lets go get drunk! Sheepy: Bedi: You're going to die if you keep running unnecessary risks! Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh, like that'll be a problem. Sheepy: Bedi:....! Sheepy: *Bedi, without warning, punches Kay!* Arsé-kun: Kay: ... I deserved that. But I already GOT beat up for my hubris! Can I go home now? Sheepy: Bedi: Do what you want. According to you, I don't care, and it doesn't really matter either way. Arsé-kun: Kay: Fuck, Bedi, obviously you do or you wouldn't be here. Sheepy: Bedi: Well, you say your death wouldn't be a problem. You know better than I do. Arsé-kun: Kay: Let me just add another instance of "reckless dumbass" on my list of sins and shut up. Arsé-kun: Kay: Because HE'S about as charismatic as a wet paper towel *he gestures to Grif* It was my job to lure th' fuckin' twig of a man out of hiding. I did it. I really did, but I'm kind of an asshole. Y'know! The kind that keeps going until I get bitchsmacked? Y'know!! Sheepy: Bedi:...But... Sheepy: Grif: I would've just put him out of commission so I could've grabbed him. You didn't need to do that. Sheepy: Grif: Although, I suppose this is more pacifistic. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... *he shoots Grif a glare* .... Not helping me here, stupid. Sheepy: Grif: Hmm. How to help... Sheepy: Grif: Ah. Sheepy: Grif: The enemy was weak so I let it fight you for valuable experience. Sheepy: Grif: But after I realized you were weaker, I dealt with it. Arsé-kun: *>Kay will remember this* Sheepy: Grif: It's okay. You can gain experience by just being with me. I was rushing too quickly into things. Sheepy: Grif: Don't get hurt in the future. Arsé-kun: Kay: gee whiz. Sheepy: Grif: I nearly did regrettable things there. Arsé-kun: Kay: Sucks. Sheepy: Grif: Ah... No, tearing. Arsé-kun: *Kay doesn't bother correcting him* Arsé-kun: Kay: Hey, how about you deal with your mission? Go. Finish that. Sheepy: Grif: You should go home. Go, go. Your face needs cleaning. Deflection. Sheepy: Grif: It kind of stings though. Too bad it doesn't work for internal wounds. Sheepy: Grif: You can't drink it or you'll die. Sheepy: Grif: Me, I tried it once to deal with internal injuries. It's listed as a consumable, after all. Sheepy: Grif: I... Sheepy: *Bedi's already begun walking away wordlessly. Shut up Grif* Arsé-kun: Kay: ..... Ugh. Look, Bedi, you're right and I appreciate it, but could you at least let me have the one try at helping other people? For once? Sheepy: Bedi: And putting your life at risk? If you died, I'd...! Just do what you want! Arsé-kun: Kay: Why not?? I've already done it enough goddamn times! It'll work eventually! Sheepy: Bedi: It's only a matter of time before you lose something truly precious to you because of your actions. Arsé-kun: Kay: I have two friends and no goddamn life. What the hell else is there to lose? My current record for all time low? Sheepy: Bedi: I... Sheepy: Bedi: I can tell you aren't going to budge from your viewpoint. You're already damaging your health. This isn't much different. I can't stop you either way. So... I'll stop trying. That's what you'd like, right? Arsé-kun: Kay: That's not what I said. You deaf? Or just ignorant like Lucan? I gave TRYING to help someone the ol' college try, and I get it! I'm not built for it! Sheepy: Bedi: You aren't going to risk your life anymore? Sheepy: Grif: ? Sheepy: Bedi: That's not what I... Sheepy: Grif: I see... Arsé-kun: Kay: Then what can I do that won't somehow end in being lectured?? Sheepy: Grif: Humans give up after one or two failures. I see. Arsé-kun: Kay: This one does! We're not all juggernauts of willpower like you, moron! Sheepy: Grif: But you helped me. Sheepy: Grif: I'm bad with people. So you coaxed him out. I appreciate that. Thank you. Arsé-kun: *... Despite feeling every variation of the word "bitter", Kay appreciates this. He isn't replying to it, though.* Sheepy: Grif: I just threw you into the deep end and you drowned. That's okay. Maybe at a smaller depth you can start learning to swim. Sheepy: Grif: Although, the last time I went into water... Let's not go in water. Sheepy: Grif: Hey, I know. All you need is to be able to begin by practicing on a foe who won't hit you. Sheepy: Grif: You can practice on me. Arsé-kun: Kay: That's retarded. Sheepy: Grif: I'm a dummy. Sheepy: Grif: You punch me and I don't fight back. Like the wooden dummies. Sheepy: Grif: But I'm a flesh dummy Sheepy: Grif: Because I'm made of flesh. Arsé-kun: Kay: Go finish what you started before I deck you and shove my boot so far up your ass that you can taste it. Sheepy: Grif: Amazing... How capable you are. Show me your moves when I'm done. Sheepy: Grif: I'll be back soon without this man. You can then deck me and boot me. Arsé-kun: Kay: If I'm still here. Still debating it. Sheepy: Grif: You won't be home? Arsé-kun: Kay: Haven't decided. Sheepy: Grif: But I have "bonding with Kay" on my schedule for today. Arsé-kun: Kay: Didn't we do that already? Was all this not enough? Was me appreciating your sentiments not enough either? Fuck. Sheepy: Grif: ? Arsé-kun: Kay: Don't worry about it. Sheepy: Grif: Okay, I won't. Sheepy: Grif: Make sure you treat your face. If you don't know how, I can do it. Sheepy: Grif: I've done it many times for myself. Arsé-kun: Kay: I'll get it dealt with. Sheepy: Grif: Okay. Be safe. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, uh. You too. Sheepy: Grif: Worry not. I'm the most dangerous being on the path usually. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... I was being polite, moron. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Polite... Sheepy: Grif: Kay can be polite... Hmm... Arsé-kun: Kay: Goddamn GO already, dipshit! Sheepy: Grif: Okay. Bye. *he heads off* Arsé-kun: *Kay drags himself off. He has no idea where he's going, but he sure is.* Sheepy: *Later on...* Sheepy: Holmes: --Are you Kay? Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, what's it to ya? *he leans over to see from his perch in a tree. his mood has not improved.* Sheepy: Holmes: Your friend was looking for you. He told me you went missing and asked me to find you. Sheepy: Holmes: Or he claimed to be your friend, anyway. I suppose I have no evidence backing that up. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Yeah, sounds right. Lemme guess: "Go home"? Sheepy: Holmes: You got it. Sheepy: Holmes: I can walk you back if you'd like. Sheepy: Holmes: I have jobs to do but I don't mind. Sheepy: Holmes: If not, make sure you head back soon. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, yeah, I'll get going. Hold on. Sheepy: Holmes: Good. Arsé-kun: *Kay gets down. Holmes would recognize the thing in his mouth as a wood carving knife. and the thing in his hand as a work-in-progress carving.* Sheepy: Holmes: Hmm, maybe that's why he was concerned. Arsé-kun: Kay: ? *he takes the knife out* What? Sheepy: Holmes: Nothing. Arsé-kun: Kay: Look, if you're gonna call me a dumbass, just get it over with. Sheepy: Holmes: Oh, then it's over with? Sheepy: Holmes: Well, let's head back then. Sheepy: Holmes: Unless you're going alone. Sheepy: Holmes: It's up to you, but student escort services are always open. Arsé-kun: Kay: I can manage. Thanks anyway. Sheepy: Holmes: You're welcome. Sheepy: *Holmes heads off.* Arsé-kun: *Kay does start going home, gradually, but he's taking his time.* Sheepy: *Understandable, Kay!* Arsé-kun: *Do we have the time to hit another plot pont? WE DOOOO* Sheepy: Holmes: --Good afternoon. Arsé-kun: Herb: Good afternoon, Detective. Are you here for an autopsy report? Sheepy: Holmes: You could call it that. Sheepy: Holmes: I've heard murmurings that you have something to do with the disappearances of bodies at the morgue. Sheepy: Holmes: Do you have updates that you wanted to submit? Arsé-kun: Herb: How ridiculous. I'm a medical examiner. I'm going to take them to do my job. If you'd like documents for the last dozen that I've done, I'll need to print them. No current updates. Sheepy: Holmes: Is that so. Sheepy: Holmes: I'd like the documents, yes. Arsé-kun: Herb: That's a shame. As you can see, both of my hands are currently occupied. Sheepy: Holmes: Then as you do that, I'd like to ask you a few more questions. Arsé-kun: Herb: Certainly, but no touching anything. Sheepy: Holmes: Worry not. I won't need to. What happens to the bodies after you work with them? Arsé-kun: Herb: After they leave my possession? Hell if I know. I'm not a graveyard worker. Sheepy: Holmes: Oh, now that doesn't seem quite right. Sheepy: Holmes: You're sure about that? Arsé-kun: Herb: You know what I mean. I don't decide where they're buried and whatnot. Sheepy: Holmes: But you do decide if they are buried or not, don't you? Even if you aren't supposed to. Arsé-kun: Herb: Detective, I hate when you do this. What do you want? Did something happen that warrants my concern again? Sheepy: Holmes: Ah, I think it should warrant your concern. Sheepy: Holmes: I was informed you're reviving bodies. Sheepy: Holmes: If you're going to do science experiments deserving their place in horror movies, please do it outside of class where one of your little experiments doesn't try to get up in front of students. Arsé-kun: Herb: ... It was after class had already ended, first of all. Second, it was put down by my patron's child, and third? The movies already exist. Sheepy: Holmes: Exactly. You need not recreate them. Arsé-kun: Herb: Look, if some medical dropout can achieve it, then I absolutely deserve a second try at making it work! Sheepy: Holmes: Please do it in a better controlled environment. Arsé-kun: Herb: Let me just pay for that! Oh wait. I can't. My patron is a money hog. Sheepy: Holmes: However, it could have gotten up before class ended. Arsé-kun: Herb: Class! Was! Over! It did not get up until well afterwards! Sheepy: Holmes: That was coincident timing. It could have risen before class was over. Sheepy: Holmes: Do not endanger people with your experiments. Arsé-kun: Herb: It isn't getting up if it isn't injected. Sheepy: Holmes: How did another student see it, then? Arsé-kun: Herb: A student stayed behind with my patron's child as he discussed an irrelevant matter with me. Sheepy: Holmes: I see. Wait untik they all leave next time. Sheepy: holmes; I can't stop you but I can try to create some boundaries Arsé-kun: Herb: What do you think the barriers are for? Fun? Sheepy: Holmes: No. Sheepy: Holmes: Wait until the students leave next time. All students. Don't give them unnecessary fears about undead. Arsé-kun: Herb: Does it help if the student in question was more upset by the corpse than it being undead? Because that is very strange even in my opinion. Sheepy: Holmes: No. Sheepy: Holmes: Be more careful in the future. I would not like for rumors to spread and students to be concerned. Thank you. Sheepy: Holmes: Will you be more careful? Arsé-kun: Herb: Yes, yes. Now get out of my office. Sheepy: Holmes: I'll take your word for it. Goodbye, and good luck. *he exits* Arsé-kun: *Herb grumbles something about kicking students out after class and then goes back to work. His legit job. the glowing green stuff is not present* Sheepy: *Good, it's good to do your legit job sometimes!* Arsé-kun: *ok back to Kay and his tiring trek up the stairs. He's not feeling it. He's really not feeling it. Time to quit and use the elevator* Sheepy: *you do that, Kay!* Arsé-kun: *whys this bitch smell like flowers? did merlin practice magic in here?* Sheepy: *at least he can return to his place and rest!* Arsé-kun: *Kay pushes his dorm door open after kicking it in the right spot. who needs a doorknob when u have knowledge* Sheepy: *It doesn't take long for someone to hug Kay without warning!* Arsé-kun: Kay: ?! Sheepy: ?: Welcome back! I've been waiting for you! Sheepy: *It's a young girl with reddish blonde hair. Wrong dorm?* Arsé-kun: Kay: Wh-wh-why are YOU here?!? Sheepy: ?: *she tilts her head* I guess you wouldn't know, would you? Arsé-kun: Kay: No, I wouldn't! I've been out all day! Sheepy: ?: We're roommates now, 'roomie'!... I don't really like calling you that, so you'll still be Kay. Arsé-kun: Kay: Aru, that's not funny, why are you here? This is a guy's dorm for four people max, anyway. Sheepy: Aru: Just as I said, I'm your new roommate. Sheepy: Aru: Teacher got a hold of someone who worked here, so it's all legitimate. Don't worry about that! Sheepy: Aru:...Although, let's be honest, he probably bribed them. Sheepy: Aru: If it helps any, it wasn't because of you. You're a pleasant coincidence! Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, but I told some of the guys I don't have siblings. Awkward. Sheepy: Aru: But you have me. You also have Arthur and Arturia. Arsé-kun: Kay: Gosh, you really had to... Arsé-kun: Kay: Because it's easier to keep families together? Wait, no. Arsé-kun: Kay: I don't know. Sheepy: Aru: It's okay, you can have a "you tried" prize! *she gives him a flower* Arsé-kun: Kay: Thanks? Sheepy: Aru: I'm here for Merlin. Arsé-kun: Kay: That is actually extremely worrying. What do you want with that shithead? Sheepy: Aru: He's my new teacher. Now I have two. Sheepy: Aru: Teacher said to learn from him for a while. Arsé-kun: Kay: Him? Responsibility? He's like a 70's wizard hippie. He doesn't do work. Sheepy: Aru: Yes, I met him and immediately realized that I'm just a plot device to teach it to him as he teaches me. Arsé-kun: Kay: Good fucking luck, but it doesn't mean I'm happy that you're here. I mean, sure, but this is a guy's dorm! Sheepy: Aru: So far, the three I've met have been, uh... Arsé-kun: Kay: Shit wizard, dumbass and Bedi? Sheepy: Aru: Yes. Sheepy: Aru: The second one, I gave him a gift, and he... Arsé-kun: Kay: Great, now I don't have to do it. The moron's, uh. A bit special. Sheepy: Aru: Who eats people's gifts?! Arsé-kun: Kay: *mocking grif* it restores my hit points Sheepy: Aru: Just, right then and there? Nobody eats flowers! Sheepy: Grif: It was tasty. Arsé-kun: Kay: Don't eat my sister's gifts you mon-- You bastard. Sheepy: Grif: But it's tasty. Sheepy: Aru: I worked hard to find these. You can only find them, well... Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Well? Did you do the same dumb shit I did earlier? Sheepy: Aru: If I've grasped the situation, yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: By "Earlier" i mean several hours ago. Now please move. I need to pour the non-drinking alcohol on my face and burn it. Sheepy: Aru: *she shifts* Arsé-kun: Kay: .... wait hold the fuck on why were YOU going off?! Sheepy: Aru: The best materials are found off the path. Sheepy: Aru: There's flowers if you look for them, so I pick those, too. Sheepy: Grif: They're tasty. Arsé-kun: Kay: Can you at LEAST bring someone with you??? Sheepy: Aru: Who would I bring? Arsé-kun: Kay: Who cares? Just don't do it alone. That's how you get fucked up. Sheepy: Aru: The creatures out there aren't so bad once you get to know them. Arsé-kun: Kay: One took Bedi's arm off! Sheepy: Aru: Well, that's true. Arsé-kun: Kay: All it takes is one in a bad mood and whoops! You're dead! Sheepy: Aru: I'm not so sure. Arsé-kun: Kay: You're the worst. One fucked up my vision permanently and you "Aren't sure"?? Sheepy: Aru: I just don't think they're all bad. Arsé-kun: Kay: I wanna see Bedi's face when you say that shit. Also, where is he? Sheepy: Aru: He was moping and worrying about you in his room earlier. Sheepy: Aru: I think I cheered him up a bit. Arsé-kun: Kay: Pain in my ass. *he pats Aru's shoulder on the way past. bye, annoying sister!* Sheepy: Grif: That's what my uncle calls me. Arsé-kun: Kay: wonder why. *he ducks into the pantry briefly and then knocks on Bedi's door* Sheepy: Bedi: *he doesn't sound happy* Come in. Arsé-kun: *Kay opens the door, takes a few steps in, and then lightly tosses a capri sun at Bedi. take the juice u stupid overworrying bitch* Sheepy: Bedi: ? Arsé-kun: Kay: Got somethin' else but I ain't throwing it. Sheepy: Bedi: ??? Arsé-kun: *Kay puts the wood carving he'd made down on the nearest surface. It's... It's Fou! He did a good job on this one!* Sheepy: Bedi:...! It's cute...! Arsé-kun: Kay: For you, because I'm an asshole. Sheepy: Bedi: Thank you. I appreciate it. Arsé-kun: Kay: Thought you would. The guy you sent to complain at me caught me while I was finishing it. Sheepy: Bedi: I was just worried. I didn't know if you were coming back. Arsé-kun: Kay: Obviously. This is MY dorm after all! Sheepy: Bedi: I know, it’s just... Sheepy: Bedi: I’m sorry about what I said. Everything I said. Sheepy: Bedi: I just can’t stand the idea of you getting hurt. I think seeing you off the path after everything and seeing the injuries on your face made me blow up. I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry. Sheepy: Bedi: ... Especially since the only thing holding me back from pursuing you was Merlin. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, me too. But I don't want you doing the stupid shit! That's always my gig, and if you got hurt again I might honesty commit arson. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... But huh, Merlin vanished real quick once we showed up. Sheepy: Bedi: Um, arson...where?? Arsé-kun: Kay: Hell if I know. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Real talk, though. Arsé-kun: Kay: Grif kinda just recruited me to help rescue one guy and I thought "Hey, I've seen this man punch through bone. It'll be fine probably!" Arsé-kun: Kay: It was mostly okay? Shockingly? I think he's a repellant. I still absolutely hated it and don't wanna repeat it though! Sheepy: Bedi: So you won't do it again? Arsé-kun: Kay: Not willingly! Sheepy: Bedi: Have you treated your face yet? Arsé-kun: Kay: Nope. Sheepy: Bedi: I'll do it myself if you won't. Arsé-kun: Kay: I just didn't get to it yet! Sheepy: Bedi: It might get infected. You don't know what was on those claws. Arsé-kun: Kay: Fair enough. Sheepy: Bedi: I'll do it if you won't. Arsé-kun: Kay: Look, if you wanna do it so bad, just say so! Sheepy: Bedi: Give it to me. Arsé-kun: Kay: I didn't bring it with me! Sheepy: Bedi: Then I'll get it. Sheepy: *Bedi leaves briefly before returning with the necessary tools.* Arsé-kun: *Medical supplies! Surprise tools that will help us later!* Sheepy: Bedi: *he goes to treat Kay's face!* Arsé-kun: *kay has a bad time. but less bad than anything else. it is tolerated* Sheepy: Bedi: I'm sorry about the stinging, but it's better than an infection. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, absolutely. Sheepy: Bedi: Should we bandage it? Arsé-kun: Kay: Without getting my everything else? I don't think so. Sheepy: Bedi: I see... I suppose injuries heal faster when exposed to the air, right? Arsé-kun: Kay: I know they heal faster when exposed to Merlin doing his job. Sheepy: Bedi: Right, let's talk to him then. Arsé-kun: *Merlin's sweater is slightly on fire while he stares at Aru. He's not angry. Just sort of disappointed* Sheepy: Aru: That's less flammable than I would have guessed... Arsé-kun: Merlin: I liked this sweater... Arsé-kun: Kay: Fuck your sweater! Heal me, bitch! *classy* Sheepy: Aru: I'll try again without burning your sweater!... No promises I won't burn something else! Sheepy: Bedi:?! Arsé-kun: Merlin: I asked her to show me what she already knew. It went about as well as when I ask you for a progress update! Sheepy: Bedi: Ah... So not well. Sheepy: Aru: Maybe you should invest in clothes that aren't flammable. Sheepy: Aru: I'm sure they exist. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, they exist, made of what used to be called salamander furs! It's a very bad idea! Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's known today as Asbestos! Sheepy: Aru: Well, this is a problem. Sheepy: Bedi: I try very hard, but I always slip up. Arsé-kun: Merlin: mistakes happen. Arsé-kun: Kay: My ass done get learned. Can somebody heal my goddamn face?? Sheepy: Aru: I could try, but there's a chance I could mess up. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yes, yes, let me put myself out first. Arsé-kun: *Merlin deals with this by taking his sweater off and stomping on it. Whatever works!* Sheepy: Grif: Another way to put out a fire is to not be set on fire to begin with. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You get it. But I save that for me, not my shirt. Arsé-kun: Merlin: right, right, heals. Coming up! Arsé-kun: *Merlin heals Kay. hp fully restored. the floor is flowers again* Sheepy: Grif: How? Sheepy: Grif: The floor is covered in plants... Sheepy: Grif:...*he bends down, plucks one of the flowers, and eats it* Arsé-kun: Merlin: It just kinda happens! Better to use the excess for something rather than just exploding things! Sheepy: *Aru is awestruck!* Sheepy: Aru: I want to learn how to do that! Arsé-kun: Merlin: I get the impression it's better suited for you, anyway. Kay would probably prefer that too. Arsé-kun: *KAY WILL REMEMBER THIS* Sheepy: Aru: What? Arsé-kun: Kay: He's being a bitch Sheepy: Aru: I got that impression about him from Teacher... Sheepy: Bedi: Ah, he's become infamous. Arsé-kun: Merlin: How?? From who? Sheepy: Aru: From my teacher, of course. He told me to go learn from you. I feel like he'd be better suited, but maybe he's a little worried about you? Arsé-kun: Merlin: But who the hell is that? Who knows about me?? Sheepy: Aru: Primo. Arsé-kun: *Merlin blankly stares at her. The Merlin is processing complex abstractions* Sheepy: Aru: I've been learning from him for a while now. Sheepy: Aru: You know him, don't you? Arsé-kun: Merlin: I... No? Sheepy: Aru: He'd be disappointed to learn that. Sheepy: Aru: I'm surprised to learn that, too. Arsé-kun: Merlin: If you mean someone I'm supposed to know, I absolutely don't! What kinda name is "Primo" anyway?? Isn't that an Adventure Time character? Sheepy: Aru: I wouldn't know that, but it seems like something he'd like. Sheepy: Aru: Should I tell you? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Obviously!!! Sheepy: Aru: Well, I'll give you some hints, then. As you learn more about me, you'll learn about him, too. That's both a promise and a threat. Sheepy: Aru: He's an old man with an awful sense of humor. He's taught famous people in the past. Now he's teaching my siblings and me. ...Kay not included, of course. Arsé-kun: Kay: Wait, am I the only one excluded here?! Why??? Sheepy: Aru: Do you want to be included? Arsé-kun: Kay: I don't like being EXcluded! Sheepy: Aru: Well, I can talk to him about it, but he may just say, "it's the fate of a Kay to always be left out!" Arsé-kun: Kay: What the absolute fuck does THAT mean?! Sheepy: Aru: Well, think of one Kay who gets to be included. Arsé-kun: *Kay just frowns* Sheepy: Aru: Sir Kay of the Round Table got ordered around by his little brother. Sheepy: Aru: And Cain smashed a rock into his brother's head. Sheepy: Aru: Both because they didn't get to be included in importance! Arsé-kun: *Kay proceeds to throw a cushion at Aru* Sheepy: Aru: Ouch! Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh, so sorry! Cain instinct! Sheepy: Aru: You strive to be included by executing me...?! Arsé-kun: Kay: French revolution! Sheepy: Aru: But I'm not French! Arsé-kun: Kay: Neither was the queen, but here we are! Sheepy: Bedi: Cain instinct... Sheepy: Bedi: I can't really say I've ever had the urge to smash Lucan's head in with a rock. ...Does that make me Abel? How chilling... Arsé-kun: Kay: Sounds right to me. Lucan's an ass. Sheepy: Bedi: I won't disagree with you. Sheepy: Grif: Hah. If someone hit me with a rock I would simply crush it in my hand. Sheepy: Bedi: I don't think a blow to your head would cause any damage. Arsé-kun: Kay: I don't think there's anything to damage. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes... Sheepy: Grif: The head is usually the weak point on an enemy. Sheepy: Grif: I will not tell you my weak point. Sheepy: Grif: Achilles was foolish for letting everyone know his name. Of course his Achilles' heel would be his weak point. It's in the name. Sheepy: Bedi: Ah... There's so many things wrong in that one sentence.. Arsé-kun: Merlin: The. That didn't get the name until after Achilles died. Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: Merlin: That tendon was named after him, not the other way around. Sheepy: Grif:.... Sheepy: Grif: Humans evolved to have tendons thanks to Achilles, hm. Humans must've been weak before that. Arsé-kun: Merlin: NAMED after, not CREATED after! Sheepy: Grif:....... Sheepy: Grif:....Can I just call it Achilles' heel? Sheepy: Grif: That name... it's too long. By the time I finish saying it, Achilles will be dead. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It IS called Achilles' heel! And what is THAT supposed to mean?! Sheepy: Grif: You said it was named "after, not created after"... Sheepy: Grif: That's a mouthful. If I told Achilles that an arrow was going for that, he'd die before I could finish. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ....... Arsé-kun: Merlin: I quit. Sheepy: Grif: No. Never quit. Never give up. Not until you've achieved your goals. Arsé-kun: Merlin: The spot Achilles was shot was, after his death, renamed to be called "Achilles' Heel". It was not called that before his death. Thank you. Sheepy: Grif: .......... Sheepy: Grif; Then what was it called? Arsé-kun: *Merlin pauses to look this up* Arsé-kun: Merlin: The calcaneal tendon. Sheepy: Grif: Hm.....but it's what goes into your bones........ Sheepy: Grif: You drink milk for it. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah. But whatever. I'm not a science major or anything! Sheepy: Grif: What is your major, then? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Art! ... Not artichokes! Sheepy: Grif: Really? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yep! Sheepy: Grif: My Painting skill is Lv. 1. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Do you need that for combat, though? Sheepy: Grif: No, but I'm not only about combat. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's fair. Painting is hard. Sheepy: Grif: You have hobbies too, don't you? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah, you got me. Sheepy: Grif: I have hobbies, too. Arsé-kun: Kay: Pretty sure we all do. Sheepy: Grif: You have hobbies other than drinking? Arsé-kun: Kay: Ha ha, very funny. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yes. Sheepy: Aru: People drink to survive, though. That's not really a hobby. Sheepy: Grif: I don't. Sheepy: Aru: Doesn't that kill you? Arsé-kun: Kay: It's Grif. He's special. Sheepy: Aru: Oh, maybe he gets his liquid from flowers instead. Sheepy: Grif: Tell me your other hobbies. Sheepy: Grif: Actually, I guess I will learn them as we bond. Sheepy: Grif: Anyway, I learned something fascinating from knife guy. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah? Sheepy: Grif: It seems that the man we rescued today is named Weiss and he's a painter. It also seems he's in a bad enough state that he had to be brought to Lucan's dorm. Sheepy: Grif: The hospital. Arsé-kun: Kay: That makes sense... He looked horrible. Sheepy: Grif: So if I'd solo'd the mission, I probably would've knocked his HP to 0. Sheepy: Grif: I am bad at words, but I am good at defeating my enemies. Arsé-kun: Kay: Well, good thing I helped you, huh?? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Good job. Sheepy: Grif: Next time, you should show up to get your own Fame points. Arsé-kun: Kay: ...? Did you not mention me helping you? Sheepy: Grif: I mentioned I did nothing. I got the response of, "don't be bashful". Arsé-kun: Kay: *he frowns* Sheepy: Grif: I am inherently bashful. I bash everything. Sheepy: Grif: I tried to explain this and that I had help. They were more focused on the target. Sheepy: Grif: This is the worst. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, I agree. Sheepy: Grif: If information on this rescue spreads, I may be believed to be capable of missions like this I am not. I cause damage. Arsé-kun: Kay: I'll have to swing by and explain my half, then. I'm pretty sure I'd be allowed to do that much. Sheepy: Grif: Do it. Sheepy: Grif: When you want to. Sheepy: Aru: You saved someone? Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah. Grif dragged me along. It sucked. Sheepy: Aru: I'm impressed! Arthur and Arturia might be, too. You could flex on them eventually. Arsé-kun: Kay: I really hope so! Sheepy: Aru: In the meantime, you can brag to me! Arsé-kun: Kay: I'm allowed to brag? Sheepy: Aru: Sometimes. Arsé-kun: Kay: Right now? Sheepy: Aru: Sure. Arsé-kun: Kay: I survived off the path! I only got hit once! I managed to talk the guy down and I only cried once! Arsé-kun: *Kay seems excited* Sheepy: Aru: !!! Amazing...! Arsé-kun: *Kay starts retelling what happened. He skips a bunch of dialogue bc it isn't important (aka grif being fucking stupid), focusing mostly on the part where he did something* Sheepy: Aru: Someone was alive there all that time...? Also, how do you eat your artichokes...? They shouldn't be prickly in your stomach! Sheepy: Grif: With my mouth. Arsé-kun: Kay: Raw and whole like a fuckin' imbecile. Sheepy: Aru: N-no!!! Arsé-kun: Kay: Right! I said I'd show you how to deal with that. Sheepy: Aru: Who does that?! Arsé-kun: Kay: Sir Moron. Sheepy: Grif: I'm a 'Sir' now... *he appears flustered.* Ah... I've always wanted to be a 'Sir'... Arsé-kun: Kay: One of these days you'll realize "moron" isn't a compliment. Sheepy: Grif: It is a compliment. Arsé-kun: Kay: A moron is an idiot. Sheepy: Grif: To think you gave me a nickname... Sheepy: Grif: It makes me very happy. Arsé-kun: Kay: Sir Moron, you're a dumbass. Sheepy: Grif: The biggest compliment is to be given a nickname. Sheepy: Grif: By the way, thanks to watching you, my Bartering level has increased to 1. Arsé-kun: Kay: I'm gonna raise somethin' else, too. C'mon, I'm showin' you how to deal with an artichoke without being goddamn stupid. Arsé-kun: *stifled merlin laughter* Sheepy: Grif: Eh? Show me. Arsé-kun: *kay shows him. how? fuck if i know im not googling it* Sheepy: Grif: Amazing. So that's how you cook it. Sheepy: Grif: My cooking level has increased and I've learned a new recipe. Arsé-kun: Kay: So you better not eat it whole again, you fuckin' idiot. Sheepy: Grif: I see.. Sheepy: Grif: But what if I'm hungry? Sheepy: Grif: I can't cook sometimes. Arsé-kun: Kay: Eat something else?? Sheepy: Grif: Hmmm... Sheepy: Grif: Like an avocado. Sheepy: Grif: That requires no preparation. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Sheepy: Grif: You just take a bite. Arsé-kun: Kay: I hate this. So much. Sheepy: Grif: Why? Arsé-kun: Kay: You don't do that either. Sheepy: Grif:...?! Sheepy: Grif: Could it be... I've been eating many foods wrong...? Arsé-kun: Kay: Fuck, probably. Sheepy: Grif: For example... bananas. Sheepy: Grif: People say they're good, but I... Sheepy: Grif:....They're too rubbery. Arsé-kun: Kay: Don't eat the peel you stupid bitch Sheepy: Grif:....Peel? Arsé-kun: Kay: Uuuggggghhhhh! You're an idiot! Didn't your parents teach you anything?! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Survival and combat. Sheepy: Grif: My Dad went to great lengths to teach me flight. Sheepy: Grif: I was never any good at it. Arsé-kun: Kay: About living like a normal person! Sheepy: Grif:..... Sheepy: Grif: Hmmm... Sheepy: Grif: No. Arsé-kun: Kay: No shit. He should get on that. Sheepy: Grif: I am learning it from observation. Sheepy: Grif: I am mostly around you, so I am mostly learning about normal life from you. Arsé-kun: Kay: Unfortunate. Sheepy: Grif: I learned from Lucan that normal people generally use spoons for foods like soup. Arsé-kun: Kay: I'm not asking what you did to learn that. Sheepy: Grif: I ate it without the spoon. Arsé-kun: Kay: That's still not as bad. Sheepy: Grif: I could construct a comfy cave. Sheepy: Grif: That's what Dad taught me Sheepy: Grif: That's how I made my room comfortable so quickly, too. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, and then stole all my cushions and called them soft rocks. Sheepy: Aru: Poor you... Arsé-kun: Kay: But whatever. Lesson over. Fuck off so I can clean the dishes. Sheepy: Grif: I will do so. Sheepy: *Grif exits* Arsé-kun: Kay: Aru, the drying towel's on a fridge magnet. Come make yourself useful for once. Sheepy: Aru: I'm useful usually...! *she grabs the towel and goes over to help* Arsé-kun: *hoooorrray, teamwork* Sheepy: *yes!* Arsé-kun: *we proceed to skip to the next day* Sheepy: *There's bickering in the kitchen...* Arsé-kun: *Kay just sighs. He already misses his quiet mornings* Sheepy: *What will you do, Kay?* Arsé-kun: *check it out, obviously.* Arsé-kun: Yog: --It is a required questline. You do require the given debuff resistance for the future seasons. That is to say, you're going to get sick if you don't! Sheepy: Grif: Hah! Sickness can't stop me! Sheepy: Grif: Abandon quest! Abandon quest! Arsé-kun: Yog: I cannot. This quest is required. Sheepy: Grif: No...! Sheepy: Grif: If I just focus on side quests, the main quest line can never stop me!! Arsé-kun: Kay: Grif, just get it over with. It ain't shit. *he yawns* Morning, Aru, welcome to hell. Sheepy: Aru: Do you really need a talking microwave...? *she's tired and hungry. let her eat in peace, grif* Sheepy: Grif: No!! Sheepy: Grif: I refuse! Arsé-kun: Kay: That's his dad calling. He can't be assed to use a phone. You get used to it. Sheepy: Aru: I see... Teacher could do this, too. Arsé-kun: *Fou is investigating the microwave* Sheepy: Grif: Doctors are evil. All of them. Sheepy: Grif: They stick me with pointy objects and hit me with things, all while babbling about things. They poke at me and shine lights into me. Sheepy: Grif: And then... they expect you to pay them....! Sheepy: Grif: I'm already doing that by not biting their hand!! Arsé-kun: Kay: *he sighs* Do you want to watch me get mine done? It literally takes a minute. Sheepy: Grif: No...! That's how they get you! Sheepy: Grif: And then they run all sorts of tests on you to make sure you're "healthy"...! Arsé-kun: Kay: That's their job. That is literally in the job description. Sheepy: Grif: I do not like people touching me and getting in my space...! Arsé-kun: Kay: That's rough, buddy. *he just pats Grif's shoulder and passes him to obtain food* Sheepy: Grif: I'll bite any doctor who gets near me! Sheepy: Aru: Grif, would you bite Kay? Sheepy: Grif: ...? No, I like Kay. Sheepy: Aru: Then you wouldn't you cause problems for Kay? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Aru: Okay, if you went with Kay and bit someone, you'd be causing him problems. Sheepy: Grif:....! Arsé-kun: Kay: She's goddamn right. That'd be a massive pain in my ass. Arsé-kun: Kay: And that isn't literal! Sheepy: Grif: I see... Sheepy: Grif: So don't go with you. Sheepy: Grif: But if you go, they might attack you with that hammer thing, so I have to be there to protect you from such a thing. Arsé-kun: Kay: It doesn't even hurt, you idiot. Sheepy: Grif: And yet...! They poke you and prod you. Clearly, they're plotting something! Arsé-kun: Kay: So are animal doctors plotting, too? The people who take care of pets when they're sick? They must be evil too by that logic. Sheepy: Grif: No, those are fine. They take care of animals. Arsé-kun: Kay: Human doctors are vets for people. Sheepy: Grif: ............ Sheepy: Grif: Name one time a doctor has helped you when you were sick. Arsé-kun: Kay: I got sick and they sent me home with a medicine prescription and a lollipop. I got to stay home that week. Arsé-kun: Kay: Also the time I NEARLY LOST MY EYE YOU MORON Arsé-kun: Kay: Who do you think dealt with the aftermath of that? Satan?? A dentist??? Cthulhu???? Sheepy: Grif: ? Sheepy: Grif: Merlin, of course. Arsé-kun: Kay: Fuck no. Sheepy: Grif: What? Sheepy: Grif: He helped me. Arsé-kun: Kay: He couldn't stop blowing himself up until he was like twelve. Fuckin' moron. Sheepy: Grif: Oh, well that's not too bad. Arsé-kun: Kay: Point is, no! No he did not! Sheepy: Grif: Well, that's too bad for you. Sheepy: Grif: Anyway, good luck on your flu shot. Arsé-kun: Kay: What the fuck do you mean "Good luck"?! That's needlessly ominous! Sheepy: Grif: Just as I said. Good luck. Arsé-kun: Yog: By skipping this event, you may be unable to use a required facility in the future. Are you sure about this? Sheepy: Grif: Required facility? Arsé-kun: Kay: Oop, looks like you gotta come! Too bad! Sheepy: Grif: N-no...!! Arsé-kun: *muffled minecraft music from the microwave* Arsé-kun: Kay: You just gotta watch me get it done. I didn't say get it done yourself. Arsé-kun: Kay: Anyway? I got hurt on your mission. Karma's a bitch, pussy boy. Sheepy: Grif:...Fine. When? Arsé-kun: Merlin: How about right now? Sheepy: Grif:...Fine! Sheepy: Bedi: Don't worry. We'll be there to support you. Arsé-kun: *later!* Sheepy: *Grif is shaking all over* Arsé-kun: *Merlin offers him a flower* Sheepy: Grif: What? What is this for...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: I dunno. I kinda expected you to just take it and eat it. I didn't think we'd get here. Sheepy: Grif: ...?! Sheepy: Grif: Uh... I'm not hungry. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Then hold onto it for later. Sheepy: Grif:...Thanks. Arsé-kun: *1x flower obtained* Sheepy: Bedi: I feel bad for the people who work here. They need more staff. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah, same. They're doing their best but there's an underlayer of misery. Sheepy: Grif: I have to work harder to make everyone's lives easier... Arsé-kun: Kay: Stupid. You can't do everything. Sheepy: Grif: No. Not yet. Arsé-kun: Kay: You can't hire people to work. Sheepy: Grif: My bartering skill isn't high enough yet, yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: You're not the boss of the school. Sheepy: Grif: Why would I need to be a boss? Sheepy: Grif: Isn't it my job to fight bosses? Sheepy: Grif:...Do I die a hero or live to become what I detest the most...? Sheepy: Bedi: What... what do you detest the most? Sheepy: Grif: Doctors. Arsé-kun: Dr. Raphael: Now, now, that's just a bit cruel, isn't it? *here he comes. the bundle of sunshine himself. the man the myth the leg, it ends* Are we all a group, or separate? Sheepy: Grif: No. It's not cruel if it's true. Doctors run tests and ask you all sorts of confusing questions... Sheepy: Bedi: We're a group. Sheepy: Bedi: Partially because, ah... If you haven't met him before, it's important you get prewarning: he may try to bite you. Arsé-kun: Raph: That warning is greatly appreciated! Which of you would like to go first... *and then he spots Kay* Arsé-kun: Raph: ... Oh. Hello, Kay. I've been waiting for you! You have more than the shot to do today!~ Arsé-kun: *Now KAY is the one shaking* Arsé-kun: Raph: I'll spare you for now! You may go last this time, but if you run, you'll most certainly be caught! :D *this said without any trace of irony. cheerful with an undertone* Arsé-kun: Raph: Lets go in alphabetical order! Bedivere, would you like to go first? Sheepy: Bedi: I don't mind. Sheepy: Grif: Worry not, Kay. It's not about running faster than the bear. It's about running faster than your friend. Sheepy: Grif: If you use Bedi as bait, you can certainly flee. Sheepy: Bedi: Ah, I'm not running... Arsé-kun: Kay: Grif, go, uh, go watch Bedi get it done. Sheepy: Grif: You're... You're sacrificing me to save yourself. Sheepy: Grif: I see... This is truly what it means to be a hero. Arsé-kun: Kay: N-no! I'm just not gonna be a good example..!! Sheepy: Grif: Fine! I'll let you take me away! You better put up a fight if you want to survive! Arsé-kun: Raph: I was going to leave you alone, but if you really insist, we can take that outside afterwards. Sheepy: Grif: Hah? You aren't going to shoot me, then? Arsé-kun: Raph: I feel like you have a serious misunderstanding of what "a shot" means in this case. But okay! Come along, both of you! Sheepy: *Bedi follows, relaxed. Grif is, for once, a bundle of anxiety.* Sheepy: Grif: Sometimes, people like you put me back in a chair and open my mouth for an hour. Arsé-kun: Raph: That's a dentist. Sheepy: Grif: If you put your hand in, I will bite it. Sheepy: Grif: What's a dentist? Arsé-kun: Raph: A doctor for your teeth. Sheepy: Grif: I don't need that. Sheepy: Grif: If I damage a tooth, I grow in a new one. Arsé-kun: Raph: Do you want them to get infected and rot in your mouth? Sheepy: Grif:? Sheepy: Grif: Infected? Arsé-kun: Raph: Just continue as you already are. It isn't like you need to go constantly. Sheepy: Grif:.... Sheepy: Grif:....Dad told me a ritual to prevent dentists from appearing... Sheepy: Grif: ...Perhaps this ritual prevents infection, too. Arsé-kun: Raph: Taking a wild guess? I'm gonna say yes. Sheepy: Grif: Then what is the doctor who snips-snips? Arsé-kun: Raph: .... The hairdressers? Sheepy: Grif: I see... Sheepy: Grif: Perhaps... my vendetta isn't just with doctors. Arsé-kun: Raph: Maybe it's with bad professionals! Anyway, Bedi, take a seat n' roll up your sleeve. You know the drill. Sheepy: *Bedi sits down and rolls up his left sleeve* Sheepy: Grif: Bad professionals are called villains. Arsé-kun: *Raph cleans off a spot with an alcohol wipe and then picks up the lil flu syringe. Idk why it is being described as "little", but it isn't HUGE either, so like, shut* Sheepy: Grif: Why did Kay seem afraid of you? He told me he didn't fear being shot. Arsé-kun: Raph: Am I legally allowed to answer that...? Sheepy: Grif: Law means nothing to doctors. Sheepy: Grif: They are chaotic, lawless beings. Arsé-kun: Raph: It means an extremely lot. We can lose our medical license if we're bad! Sheepy: Grif: So you don't have a medical license... Arsé-kun: Raph: If I didn't have one, I wouldn't be here NOW! Anyway, Bedi, good job and you're done. *he puts the bandaid on Bedi's arm. yaaay* Sheepy: Bedi: Thank you. I'll rejoin the others. *he leaves before Grif can register he's been ditched* Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: Well, I don't have a medical license, so I suppose I should not be here... Arsé-kun: Raph: No, you just can't work here. It isn't the same. Sheepy: Grif:......So a medical license is a bribe... Sheepy: Grif: I thought it was a scented thing you lit for medical purposes... Arsé-kun: Raph: ... Look, I'm going to be honest with you. I had four hours of sleep and most of what you're saying is not being processed. Sheepy: Grif: You speak of things I know not about. Sheepy: Grif: For example: "Medical license". Arsé-kun: Raph: Have someone else explain. I need to finish up flu shots and then Kay's bloodwork for the first time ever because he keeps avoiding it. Arsé-kun: Raph: *pause* Arsé-kun: Raph: shit wait Sheepy: Grif:...?! Arsé-kun: Raph: And no, it does not require grievous injury. Sheepy: Grif: Kay... works to receive blood? Sheepy: Grif: Amazing, I didn't think Kay worked at all! Arsé-kun: Raph: Bloodwork is testing the blood to make sure there's nothing wrong. Sheepy: Grif: I see. I haven't done this. Arsé-kun: Raph: I recommend it, but not now. Not today. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'm an impatient patient~~~ *and he just comes in. rude. at least he pre-rolled his sleeve* Oh, Grif's still here? Sheepy: Grif: Your sleeve is high. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Sure is! Sheepy: Grif: Why? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Did you not watch Bedi at all? Sheepy: Grif: Of course not. That would be rude. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Permission granted to watch! Sheepy: Grif: I didn't ask. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'll buy you an apple pie if you do~ Sheepy: Grif:....Fine! Arsé-kun: *Raph just repeats the process with new supplies. Flu shot! It takes about 15 seconds and then it's over! Yay! Merlin looks bored.* Sheepy: Grif: You poked him with the stick... Arsé-kun: Raph: That's the entire process. The worst it does is make your arm slightly sore for a day or so. Arsé-kun: Raph: I said slightly, not unusable. Sheepy: Grif: Let's say I don't like the feeling. How long does it take for the antivirus to go to the rest of my body? Arsé-kun: Raph: It'll spread in an hour, but takes up to 2 weeks to develop the anti.. Did you call it antivirus? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. That's what it is, isn't it? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Why would I call it the wrong name? Sheepy: Grif: Anyway, fine! I'll accept it. Arsé-kun: Raph: I'm glad you understand. This'll only take a minute. Arsé-kun: *It really does only take a minute. Grif takes 1 hp of damage. Griflet is given a lollipop* Sheepy: Grif:....? Sheepy: Grif: Weapon obtained: Mini Mace. Arsé-kun: *Raph can't be bothered to correct this. He's got one more flu shot to deliver and then his shift is over* Sheepy: Il: Blood is actually a common feature in otome games. There's a lot of games where vampires and werewolves drink the heroine's blood, and others where the heroine treats one of the ikemen's wounds... But seeing this doesn't really inspire feelings of love... This implies that it's not about the blood, but rather about the act of the protagonist helping the ikemen out in whatever ways she can... Arsé-kun: Kay: But... Grooooss..! Sheepy: Il: And yet, the romantic CGs get my heart racing...! Arsé-kun: *Kay is Very Clearly looking Il straight in the face, and away from the nurse practitioner doing bloodwork. He is not happy about any of this* Sheepy: *Il is enjoying himself!* Arsé-kun: Kay: *he sighs* Look, am I allowed to look back yet or is it still going? Sheepy: Fran: You can look back now. I just finished. Let me just bandage the area. Sheepy: Il: Oh, bandages... Arsé-kun: Kay: dont Arsé-kun: *But Kay does sigh again, this time with relief* Sheepy: Il: They're popular, too. It's the brief appearance of skin, combined with the usually strong ikemen dropping their strong persona and embracing their gentler side... Sheepy: Fran: There, I've finished. Arsé-kun: Kay: Thank G- Arsé-kun: Raph: But you're not done yet. One more minute. Arsé-kun: Kay: D: Sheepy: Il: Ah, it's you. Arsé-kun: Raph: I was wondering where you were, Il-ness. *he thinks he's funny* Hate to stab you again, but give me your other arm. Sheepy: Il: I'm here with a new friend. Arsé-kun: *Kay hesitantly rolls up his other sleeve before seeing that it's the flu shot. This he can tolerate. Maybe* Sheepy: Il: He's Cai. Arsé-kun: Kay: Close enough. Sheepy: Il: He's like the man in the game Ignis was playing... Sheepy: Il: You were doing flu shots, weren't you? Sheepy: Il: Why do you not stop it before it has flown? It would make your life easier. Arsé-kun: Raph: .... *he just gives Il this flat look before giving Kay his flu shot.* Sheepy: Il: You can stop the flu by not letting it fly. Sheepy: Il: Wear a mask. Wash your hands. Get a flu shot. Sheepy: Il: Cover your face when you cough or sneeze. So on. Arsé-kun: Raph: What he said. Do you kids need anything else, or was that it? Sheepy: Grif: Do I need something... Sheepy: Grif: Are you a vet? Arsé-kun: Raph: ... I mean, that's not far off. A vet but for people. Sheepy: Grif: I'll ask my brother how people he is next time. Arsé-kun: *Raph wisely decides not to ask* Sheepy: Grif: Kay? Do you have anything? Arsé-kun: Kay: Kay wants to go home. Sheepy: Il: Homesickness... When the heroine feels homesick, the ikemen embraces her and says that he will be her home until she can finally return Arsé-kun: Merlin: We're done. That was all we needed! Sheepy: Grif: Let's go, then. Sheepy: Il: Have a safe walk home. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You stay safe too. Sheepy: Il: I am safe always. Arsé-kun: *They leave, I guess. Raph puts his stuff away, locks the necessary cabinets, pulls out a pillow from under his desk and takes a nap right there in his office. help this man* Sheepy: *Il prays for good dreams for him by humming a lullaby. Hopefully, this doesn't give everyone else good dreams right on the spot.* Sheepy: Grif: --Do doctors usually steal your blood? Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, that's normal. But why would you mention it??? Sheepy: Grif: Why do they want it? Sheepy: Grif: They've taken mine before. I didn't let them get away with it. Arsé-kun: Kay: Are you sure you're not the menace to doctors everywhere? Sheepy: Grif: They deserve it. Arsé-kun: Kay: No, not really. Sheepy: Grif: I don't like being poked and prodded at. Arsé-kun: Kay: Well, that sucks. Sheepy: Grif: Like vampires? Arsé-kun: Kay: No, Grif. Sheepy: Grif: Do you do this every year? Arsé-kun: Kay: Yes, Grif. Sheepy: Grif: To truly mesh within human society, I have to do this every year... Sheepy: Grif:..... Sheepy: Grif: Perhaps... Humans aren't so great. Sheepy: Grif: No, even if I wanted to leave them, I couldn't. However, this... Hm. Arsé-kun: Kay: You fight horrible things and let them beat you up but that's the problem? Sheepy: Grif: Humans are fragile. Sheepy: Grif: I can't dismember the doctor. Sheepy: Grif: And anyway, doctors never know anything. Arsé-kun: Kay: But the anatomy professor is a "Dr." too, wasn't he? Sheepy: Grif: Yes, but I like him because Dad likes him. Arsé-kun: Yog: I have a great deal of respect for the humans that use their own time to help and heal others, thank you very much. Sheepy: Grif: I like Merlin, too. Arsé-kun: Merlin: But would you hate me if I ended up a doctor too? These are the real questions! Sheepy: Grif: No. I trust you. You helped me when I was hurt. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, I get it. You need to be shown that they're honest and do good work. Sheepy: Grif: Doctors throw around diagnoses without knowing enough details. For example, they say there's something wrong with me for eating rocks but don't bother asking Dad why I'd do such a thing... Sheepy: Grif: I don't trust them. Sheepy: Bedi: No, I don't think details would change the fact you shouldn't eat rocks. Arsé-kun: Merlin: But dragons eat rocks, yeah? So it'd be normal maybe? Sheepy: Bedi: True... Sheepy: Grif: I won't trust doctors until they're trustworthy. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Fair enough! Sheepy: Grif: But if you become a doctor, I'll trust you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I've considered it! Too much work. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Your major is disappointment. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's actually art, but that's good too! Sheepy: Grif: Can I try it? Sheepy: Bedi: Art isn't a food. Sheepy: Grif: I want to try it. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Uh, sure, maybe later. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. We'll bond. Sheepy: Grif: I haven't figured out how to properly choose my dialogue during bonding experiences. I am still working at this. My Charisma is low, but maybe if I interact with you more, yours will rub onto me. Sheepy: Bedi: Make sure to continue working your arm so it doesn't get very sore. Sheepy: Grif: ........ Paimon, define working. Arsé-kun: Yog: noun. the action of doing work. Arsé-kun: Yog: He is suggesting you keep active as always as to prevent the shot from making your arm sore. This is a temporary debuff, but will reward you with an increased flu resistance. Sheepy: Grif: Why can’t I just drink something? Or equip something? Sheepy: Bedi: You can equip a mask to help prevent the spread. Sheepy: Bedi: Vitamin D can also help. Sheepy: Grif: Vitamin D... Sheepy: Grif: I don't know what that is. Arsé-kun: Merlin: vitamin d-eez nuts. *he's not even impressed with his own joke* Sheepy: Grif: So that's what it stands for. Sheepy: Grif: Why do they shorten it? Arsé-kun: Merlin: It doesn't. I just like saying it. Sheepy: Grif: Ah... I've heard of this before. Sheepy: Grif: It's a trick. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's like updog. Sheepy: Grif: Updog? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Updog. Sheepy: Grif: Paimon, define updog. Arsé-kun: Yog: .... ...... It's updog. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Arsé-kun: Yog: It is a bit of wordplay based on "What's up, dog" in which another person is being referred to as "dog". The reply is usually "Not much, dog, what's up with you?". Arsé-kun: Yog: "Dog" is not literal. Sheepy: Grif: I am no dog. Arsé-kun: Yog: I repeat my previous statement. Sheepy: Grif: Why would he call me one? Arsé-kun: Yog: It is not an insult here. It is along the lines of "dude" in this case. Sheepy: Grif: Dude... Sheepy: Grif: I'm dude... Sheepy: Grif: That's really an awful nickname, isn't it. Arsé-kun: Kay: But you're okay with "moron"? Sheepy: Grif: Of course. You gave me this nickname. Sheepy: Grif: You wouldn't give me an ill fitting nickname. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah I would. Haven't you heard half the shit I call Merlin? Arsé-kun: Merlin: he used my name for once. a momentous day in history. *he's being sarcastic* Arsé-kun: Kay: bitch Sheepy: Grif: It's accurate, isn't it? Arsé-kun: Kay: I mean, yeah, you are a moron. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Bedi: Out of curiosity, Grif... do you know what a moron is? Sheepy: Grif: Me. Arsé-kun: Yog: *helpfully* Informal noun: A stupid person. Similar words include fool, oaf, idiot, dumbass, clown, dunce, and dullard. Sheepy: Grif:...?! Arsé-kun: Kay: I was very clear in calling you an idiot on the first day. Sheepy: Grif: Kay... thinks I'm a clown? Arsé-kun: Kay: No, fuck clowns. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Then you don't think I'm a moron either. Arsé-kun: Kay: Sometimes you are. Arsé-kun: Kay: Sometimes you are. Sheepy: Grif: Are you? Arsé-kun: Kay: Fuck, probably. Sheepy: Grif: Then we can be morons together. Sheepy: Bedi: Is that really something to be pleased by...? Sheepy: Grif: Uh... Sheepy: Bedi: Brute force only gets you so far. After a while, you'll need to use your head. Sheepy: Bedi: Otherwise, you'll hit a brick wall. Sheepy: Grif: And I'll smash it. Arsé-kun: Kay: With his head, probably. Sheepy: Grif: Use my head... to break the wall. Sheepy: Grif: Hmmm.... Sheepy: Grif: Wouldn't that hurt? Arsé-kun: Yog: I do not recommend using your head to break a wall. Sheepy: Grif: Dad could use his head to break a wall. Sheepy: Grif: Ah, Kay could do it though. Arsé-kun: Kay: I would really prefer not to! Sheepy: Grif: Why? I was told you're hard headed. Arsé-kun: Kay: That means stubborn! Sheepy: Grif: Stubborn... Sheepy: Grif: I'm hard headed, too. Arsé-kun: Kay: yeah you are. Sheepy: Grif: Amazing. We're actually very similar. Sheepy: Grif: The main difference is that you're better integrated into society. I'll learn how to do this too from observing you, along with Bedi and Merlin. Arsé-kun: Kay: Good fuckin' luck. I'm still an asshole. Sheepy: Grif: But I like you. Arsé-kun: Kay: Well, uh, ok. Arsé-kun: *Great reply!* Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'm back! And I promised, Griflet! *he hands griflet a box. it's warm. it smells like apple* Sheepy: Grif:.....It's warm. It smells nice. Sheepy: Grif:... *he slowly starts moving the box towards his mouth* Arsé-kun: Merlin: I bought you that pie like I said I would. Please do not eat the box. Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: Merlin: The box isn't the edible part. Sheepy: Grif: Where is the edible part? Sheepy: Grif: Inside the box? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: It's in a box for safety. What a great idea. But it isn't safe from me. Sheepy: Grif: By the way, Kay. I found this gift and thought of you. Are you ready to see it? Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Uh? I guess? *he is worried considering Grif's... everything* Sheepy: Grif: Hold out your hands, then. Arsé-kun: *Kay puts a hand out* Sheepy: *Grif takes something out of his pocket and drops it into Kay's hands. It's a shiny pebble.* Sheepy: Grif: I found this. Arsé-kun: Kay: Um. Thanks. Sheepy: Grif: Do you like it? Arsé-kun: *Kay blankly looks at him for a moment. The gesture is appreciated, but...* Arsé-kun: Kay: I guess it's nice. Sheepy: Grif: Good. I found it when I was bringing that man to the hospital. Arsé-kun: Kay: You stopped bringing a man to the hospital for a rock? Sheepy: Grif: He was in the museum all that time so he could wait. Arsé-kun: *Kay just sighs* Sheepy: *They finally return to the dorm.* Arsé-kun: *Garry has set himself up in the hallway for a long bout of Waiting. He's got a little orange wagon and several neatly stacked costume bags with him...* Sheepy: Grif: Hello. Are you moving in? Arsé-kun: Garry: No. I'm starting deliveries, you see, and I figured I'd start with your dorm as thanks! Sheepy: Grif: Do you need help? Arsé-kun: Garry: While that would be nice, I think it's better if I keep at it. Thank you anyway! Arsé-kun: *Garry pulls a bag out of the stack and hands it to Grif. x1 Jabberwocky Costume Obtained.* Sheepy: Grif: Costume unlocked. Arsé-kun: *Garry gives out the other costumes as well. Something pink to Merlin, something white to Bedi, and something blue to Kay. Hooray.* Sheepy: Bedi: Thank you! Sheepy: Bedi: Grif, make sure to thank him as well. Sheepy: Grif:? Sheepy: Grif: Uh... Thanks. Arsé-kun: Garry: You're welcome. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Of course. This is my home. Sheepy: Grif: And you're sure you don't need help? Sheepy: Grif: If not, good luck. Arsé-kun: Garry: I'm fairly certain. I've done this the last two times, but again, thanks anyway! Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: Have fun. Sheepy: Grif: By the way, Merlin. Sheepy: Grif: That pink is, eh... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Hm? Sheepy: Grif: You. Sheepy: Grif: Very you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'm glad you understand so well! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Bedi: The character fits as well, I think. Sheepy: Grif: Character? Sheepy: Bedi: The Cheshire Cat. Sheepy: Grif: I've never heard of him. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Y'know, like... *he puts the pink cat ears on his head* Nyaa~! Sheepy: Grif:....? Sheepy: Grif:...Nyaa. Arsé-kun: Kay: stop Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: Kay: Don't do that. Sheepy: Grif: Why? Arsé-kun: Kay: It sounded wrong. Sheepy: Grif: I said it wrong? Arsé-kun: Merlin: The only way to say it wrong is to not make a cat noise! Myah! Mrrrrow! Cat! Sheepy: Grif: Cats say... "cat"? Arsé-kun: Fou: Mrrraow! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Okay, no, they usually don't, but I thought you'd get the idea! Sheepy: *An unfamiliar cat joins Fou. Something feels very off about it, like it's something imitating a cat without knowing what cat is, but being close enough that at first glance it looks like a normal cat* Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Sheepy: Cat: Cat! Cat! Arsé-kun: *Fou smacks the other cat* Sheepy: Cat: ......... Arsé-kun: Fou: Mrrrrrw! Sheepy: Bedi: Where did this cat come from...? Sheepy: Cat:..... Sheepy: Cat: *honk* Arsé-kun: Merlin: Y'know, I think this is a bird. Sheepy: Cat:?! Sheepy: Grif: He's not a bird. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Griflet? I thought your pet was a bird. Sheepy: Grif: I have no pet. Sheepy: Grif: Elyan is my friend. Sheepy: Grif: He's a water. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Rrrrright. Sheepy: Grif: What? Try pouring water on him. Arsé-kun: Kay: I don't feel like cleaning right now. *he decides he's had enough of this situation and retreats to his room* Sheepy: Grif:....? Sheepy: Grif: I see. He must be tired from today. Sheepy: Grif: I'm not. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Good for you! Sheepy: Grif: Are you? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Nope. We have so much more time before the sun goes down, and that's not even a limiter! So what are we doing?? Sheepy: Bedi: Personally, I'm doing homework. Do you have anything due, Merlin? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah, but I'll do it later. Sheepy: Bedi: By doing your homework when you get it, you can spend more time having fun without worry. Arsé-kun: Merlin: By doing it later, you get to have more fun NOW! Sheepy: Bedi: But I'd spend less time worrying about your deadlines before asking you out if I knew you had finished your homework. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Ugghhh! Sheepy: Bedi: Aren't dates more fun when neither of us are worried? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah, you have a point... But there's so much! Sheepy: Bedi: On what topics? If you're having trouble understanding the concepts, depending on the topic, perhaps I could help. Or... well, he may be busy. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I have over fifty questions due. Tomorrow. It was assigned yesterday. They all have multi-parts. My professor is satan incarnate. Arsé-kun: Merlin: There needs to be homework quality control! Sheepy: Bedi: Um... Which professor? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Kashihara! It's always him! Sheepy: Bedi: I see... Sheepy: Bedi: And it's too late to drop, isn't it? Arsé-kun: Merlin: I need this class. I literally can't. Sheepy: Grif:........Satan incarnate... Sheepy: Grif: I see. So as my duty, I must... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Don't hurt the guy unless he's actually a bad guy! Sheepy: Grif: Hm? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Y-you don't wanna hurt a normal human if he is, right? Sheepy: Grif: Normal human? Sheepy: Grif:......... Sheepy: Grif: You... Your insight is so low. Arsé-kun: Kay: *from his room, which notably has the door open* Kick his ass! Arsé-kun: Merlin: I said "if", not "he IS"! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. I will. Sheepy: Grif: And you know who he is, don't you? Sheepy: Grif: Unless... you really don't...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: If he's bad, can I not do the homework? Sheepy: Grif: He's worse than bad. He's my uncle. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, jeez, seriously?! Sheepy: Grif: Of course. Sheepy: Grif: He probably doesn't read your assignments. No time. He has three jobs and he needs to also toy with people. Sheepy: Grif: Worry not. I will get revenge for you.

[wispyrainbow]

Kris Soyer Reference Sheet

-Basics-

Name(Nickname): Kristina ‘Kris’ Aimee Soyer(Krissy)

Age: 26

Gender: Female

Race: French-Hawaiian

VIT(Very Important Things): Is In a Roller Derby team with Philomena, Participated in a Karate Match and Got 2nd Place, Can get drunk off a certain amount of milkshakes, Can’t get drunk off any alcoholic beverages, Sucks at Cooking Souffles(seriously, she almost burned down the kitchen once)

DOB: 8/23/1992

-Physical Details-

Build/Body Type/Physical Frame: Chubby/Endomorph with a 42G-Cup Size

Height: 5’3”

Weight: 170

Skin: Warm Brown

Hair: Burnt Orange Big Curly Natural Fro Put Up Into a Ponytail That Bunches Around Her Shoulders(Usually Expresses To Match Her Emotions)

Eyes: Baby Blue

Other defining features/extra anatomy: Cat-like Fangs, Permanent Blush Lines, A Round Face, A Button Nose, Plump Lips, A Heart-shaped Beauty Mark on her Left Arm and A Deep Lacerations on Her Right Arm(Covered by Bandage)

Habits: Smiles, Wakes up Early, Motivates Herself, Nail biter, Cracks her knuckles, Hums to herself, Yoga, Takes Pictures with Polaroid, Says Yes to Everything, Ballet, Loses her temper, Bites Lips, Curls hair with Fingers, Takes Notes

Gestures/Mannerisms: Head Tilt, Open Hands, Makes hands-to-face gestures, Bites Fingernails, Swaying, Tugs ears, Rubs hand through Hair, Short Breaths, Plays with either a pen or marker, Hands behind back

Demeanor/Carriage/Gait: Compassionate, Honest, Optimism, Loving, Hard-working, Polite, High-spirited, Cautious, Fickle, Feminine, Walks Fairly on Legs, Ordinary Gait

Voice: Motherly-like, Nearly professional but silly, Speaks with a near topical tone Says slang like 'Couch Potato' and 'Crash'

Style: Normal

Clothing: A Pale Pink Bandana Headband

A Black Choker with A Gold Bell Attached

A Red and Black Off Both Shoulders Hooded(Black Hood with A Cat Face and Ears) Exotic Ribbon Smock Top with A Black Cat Tail Attached and Matching Detachable Short Sleeves

A Black Thickstrap Underneath

Pairs of Transparent, Paracord, and Rubber Bracelets on Both her Wrists

Short Black Fingerless Cat Paw Gloves

A Pair of Cuffed Denim Blue Booty Shorts

Black Distressed Ripped Leggings Underneath

Pink Colored Long Legwarmers that Cover Half of her Lower Legs and Sneakers

Pale Yellow with a White Tongue And Black Loosely Tied Sneakers with Small Cat Pawprints At the Bottom of Her Sneakers

-Personality-

Part One: Basic Info

Loves/Favorites: Her cat Orville(A Fluffy Bi-Color which Has a Light Blue Collar with A Bell Attached Around it’s Neck), Winter, Her friends and family, Heavy Metal and Rock, Baseball, Nature + Camping, Romantic Comedies, Karate, Dancing, Her Camper Van ‘Mighty Flower Power’, 60s clothing, Flower Crowns, Pop Music, Animals, Wrestling and Boxing, Fish, Omurice, Traveling, Polaroid Cameras and Pictures, Beaches, Parties, Sweets, Solar Eclipses, The Ocean, Honey, Legwarmers, Sweet Cinnamon Milk Tea, Swedish Fish, Sleepovers, Games, Romance Books, Mythology Books, Giving Hugs, Being Happy, Spam Musubi, Malasadas, Poi, BDSM Methods and Magazines(Though she refuses to reveal this to her friends and family)

Hates: Rivalries, Despair, Cockroaches(she will go through hell and back to get rid of it, or try and hide from any roaches), Giving up, Jellyfishes, Bullying, Crying, The 3 A’s, Being Late, People who never take responsibilities for their actions, Snobs, Nuts, Being anxious/depressed, Feeling dissatisfaction/disappointment, Feeling unpleasant, Her temper, Her Claustrophobia, Laziness, Pineapples, Two-timers, Being told to calm down, Germs, Horror movies, The heat, Hypocrites

Hobbies: Yoga, Dance, Carving, Baking, Baseball, Origami, Camping, Bicycle riding, Poetry, Knitting, Photography, Karate, Roller Derby

Talents/Skills: Basic First Aid, Sewing, Aerobics, Gains the trust of others, Gardening, Hospitality, Lip reading

Hopes/Dreams: To Find Some Place in Her Heart and Mind to Forgive Her Dad, To Find a More Stable Place to Work than Where's She At and to Move past some less than stellar moments

Fears/Nightmares: Her dad, Losing her friends and family, More acts of emotional and physical abuse being inflicted on the ones she loves and herself, A Cramp, Small Space being A means of her Death

Best Quality: Her kindness

Greatest Flaw: Her own Fierce Temper

Character Strengths: Her Optimism, Her Kidness, Supportive, Patient, Her Vitality, Technical Pacifism, Humility, Mercy/Forgiveness

And the coinciding weaknesses: Naive, Non-violent, Pacifist, Soft-hearted, Quick-tempered, Absent-minded, Disturbed, Cannot Keep a Secret, Guilt Complex, Guilty Pleasure

Quirks: Sneezes when nervous/anxious, Hears voices/sounds at times, Terrible Liar, Feels like she’s too needy, Claustrophobic, Does everything twice, Always trying to be positive, Do-gooder, Photographer

One thing she is and one thing she is not: Sweet but not exactly innocent/pure

What she wants (ex: move towards) and doesn’t want (ex: move away from, avoid): Just wants everyone and herself to be happy but wants to avoid confrontation

Part Two: In-depth Analysis

How does the character picture herself: A needy, pathetic optimist who wants to pretend I’m someone I believe I can never be whose temper is uncontrolled which can and will hurt someone I love

How do others see her: A nice girl who cares about others but whose temper needs to be grounded and kept under

Five adjectives that she would use to describe herself: Motivated, Responsible, Finicky, Overemotional, Soft

Five adjectives that others would use to describe her: Upbeat, Committed, Goody two shoes, Wet Blanket, Unchanging

Most Value Possession: Her Headband Bandanna Scarf she received from Dylan when they were kids

Darkest Secret/Treasured Memory: Her father emotionally and mentally abused her as a child and up to her teen years(Secret) and Befriending her friends and being part of a group(Treasured Memory)

Proud Accomplishment/Greatest Failure: Graduating Medical School To Become a Full-Time Nurse(Accomplishment) and Accidentally allowing her dad to injure Parker during one of his abusive states(Failure)

Is she motivated by possibility or necessity: She is a mixed case, seeing it as possible to complete stuff with clean motivation while also believing it to be a necessity in order to thrive on, though only if its something legal and healthy

Current Motivation: Just a need to get by and move on

How does she view the future and/or the past: She view the future as an improvement over everything else and the past as just plain disgusting

What is her philosophy on life and death: Life is something you shouldn't waste by believing that nothing matters and that death, while scary, is something to allow as a sorta of closure

What kind of energy level do they usually have: A inclination of positivism and optimism

How does she show and/or handle: love, affection, grief, pain, anger, sadness, conflict, change, loss: A stammering mess(love), Affectionate and total sweetheart(affection), Goes through a BSOD before fulling letting it out(grief), Shock, confusion and generally broken(pain), A destructive and furious wave that refuses to calm down(anger), Mourning and just a general mess(sadness), Generally trying to avoid any sort(conflict), Accepting despite it all(change), Monotonic and silent with chances of mumbling to herself(loss)

Does she have a temper: Oh YES

How does she respond to the surrounding world, the ‘unfamiliar,’ and other people in general: Generally ok(the surrounding world), Tries to approach in order to get a better understanding(the 'unfamiliar'), Friendly around others but isn't afraid to generally snap if they get on her bad side(people in general)

Polite or rude: Polite all around except if annoyed

Stingy or generous: Generous

What kind of ‘public’ face does she display: A sweet and optimistic outlook

Leader or a follower: A general mix of both

More happy by themselves or in a group: Happy in a group

Does she have any addictions/dependencies/fixations/fetishes/ or other strange behavior: Chewing Coffee Beans, BDSM and Aftercare, Spanking, Yaoi books, Shibari and Safeword

What is her sexual preference/experience/values: Doesn't mind any biological sex, gender or gender identity, Is ok with anything to satisfy her partner, Just wants to make whoever she's with happy

-History/Background-

Setting: Modern living with her friends(Dylan, Terry, and Philomena) in a town called NewDugWood

Occupation: Works 9-5 (sometimes works the night shift) as a nurse at the Peniko Hospital in the busy city parts of NewDugWood

Educational background/other learning experiences: All Years of Pre-K, Elementary, Middle and High School and 4 years of Medical School

Intelligence Level: College Level

Short Term Goals: To make as many friends as possible and to enjoy her life in general

Long Term Goals: To forgive her dad(though that proves impossible at the moment) and to find some form of happiness

Family: Kalia Alana-Soyer-Mother(her inspiration and basic muse), Ace Soyer-Father(angry at him for past abuse, is trying to forgive but can't), Noelani Alana-Kuku Wahine/Grandmother(Loves Spending time with, learned a lot from), Akamu Alana-Tutu Kane/Grandfather+(Misses Greatly, Another Muse for her as well and loved spending time with), Aison Callas-Soyer-Stepfather(loves him, looks up more to him than Ace), Parker Soyer-Younger Brother(Tolerates but loves regardless), Winry Callas-Soyer-Stepsister(Loves and cares about, basically admirer for her)-regardless of her father, they do love each other and are trying to find someway to forgive Ace

Friends: Dylan Akiyama-Childhood Friend(generally cares about him, worries about his health), Terry Mayfair-Childhood Friend(a bit awkward around him but is friendly nonetheless), Philomena Weber-Childhood Friend/Sister from another Mother(hangs out with and generally jokes with), Haruka Wilson-Young Girl Currently Being Taken Care of By Ms. Penny (Loves her and plays pretend with her at any moment), Shawny-Friend(respects but warns him against hurting Dylan), Montague+(trusted more than anyone knew, mourns him still), Bonnie Turner-Best Friend(Known since medical school, a tight trust with her), Iris-Android(tries to teach forms of humanity to,loves)

-Combat-

Physical Strength: Advanced strength and Acrofatic

Coordination/Reflexes: Lands on her Feet Quite Well(similar to a cat)

Fighting Style: Karate/Some Forms of Yoga

Unusual Abilities/Powers: About 6-7 on her abilities and a Bakeneko(other stories)

Weapons/Other Gear: Pair of Duel Clawed Arm Gauntlets/Arm Cannons

[theleftoverurl]

Whew what a day! I got up and had some breakfast with Kate. Veronica has a habit of buying fancy yummy food and then not quite managing to eat it before the due by date, and she had a tub of mango and passionfruit yoghurt in the fridge (the proper type, which has seeds and orangey-yellowy goodness strewn through it) that had gone off a week before that had barely just been opened (by Kate incidentally). I have been jealously eyeing it every time I open the fridge (as I take out and consume my bland vanilla Greek yoghurt) so it was actually pretty exciting to have the opportunity to get to eat it (you know you’ve hit a high point of your life when you are keen to eat week-old yoghurt) with some grapes, an overripe banana and the rest of my raspberries.

Filled with goodness, I started to type up my assignment case. It was actually surprisingly hard – I have been putting off choosing a List A and List B subject for my assignment and so was just planning to quickly type up my patient’s case, but for some reason it was quite difficult to sort out all the information I had on her into their appropriate sections of her history, to eliminate the unnecessary information and to put it all into more professional, formal medical writing. It frustrates me that I find it so easy to explain things in plain English and with verbal communication but when it comes to written communication, especially in formal language using appropriate terminology, it all falls apart a bit. Anyway, I was therefore glad when Daniel messaged me half an hour before I was due to leave for hospital to ask me to come in early to eat lunch with him.

I hopped onto the bus and made my way to the hospital common room. As I crossed the zebra crossing to the common room, I had an awkward encounter where a car stopped for me to cross as it should, but a bus going in the opposite direction didn’t, so I had to wait to cross the road and the car which stopped for me also had to wait for the bus. The impatient driver then started to motion at me to cross without looking at the bus which was obstructing my way, and so I pointed at the bus and he didn’t look so must’ve just thought I was stupid or something so rolled his window down to abuse me. Irritating. Luckily, I had my headphones in loud, so I didn’t have to hear the abuse.

Daniel had cooked me a dark rice noodle which was quite salty but very nice (he said it was under-cooked, but I really did not notice at all) and it had egg and kai-lan which was delicious. It was hilariously ironic that once again the portion-size was too big so we were both unable to finish our meals and I Ching, Will and Leonard (but mainly Leonard) had to chip in to help us finish the noodles before class, given that the reason that Daniel is even cooking for me in the first place is that he has unrealistic expectations of portion size.

We were 5 minutes late for class and had no excuse, so I think Professor O’Sullivan was distinctly unimpressed. I was sort of looking forward to case discussion because even though I didn’t have a case, I had studied ahead to the CMT tomorrow, so I felt like I was a little bit ahead knowledge-wise but as usual I was wrong, and I couldn’t really contribute a lot to the discussion. I just don’t have the wide knowledge necessary for differentials and I really need to practice thinking in that way and problem solving what patients could potentially have. I think it may be just lack of effort on my part and inability to connect the pathology to the anatomy because my anatomy is so bad, but I don’t feel as lost content-wise still as I did in Phase 1 and I feel as if I can easily fix this by improving my study technique.

After case discussion, Kuheli had an ortho clinic so she pretty much fled the room at 1:30 sharp and Will wanted to go see a GP because there’s something wrong with his ears, so I thought I would be alone on the train home. Luckily, I had to go visit my assignment patient first and Zet was going to the same ward, so he would catch the train home (for once) and so we could go to the ward together and then home. My patient was sleeping when I arrived, but she was woken up for handover, so I still got the opportunity to say hello to her. Her daughter was with her again and I am glad that she has such good social support. I checked her notes on eMR and her brain CT was clear (information I disclosed to the patient on the downlow when I probably shouldn’t have given I’m not actually the doctor oops) and she seemed in good spirits but her daughter reported that she had been confused lately and hadn’t slept well because the patient in the bed next to her was a snorer. She is going for a pleuridoses later where they drain the fluid in her lungs and then irritate the tissue until it inflames and sticks the lungs to the chest wall (sounds painful) and is going to get a biopsy to see if it’s cancer. Her daughter and her are hopeful that she will be going home especially in time for Easter, but I feel like that’s unlikely because she must get the pleuridoses and that will keep her in hospital for at least the next 48 hours so if she is discharged it will be in the nick of time. I’ve really enjoyed seeing the same patient regularly, even though I haven’t I feel like we have bonded and her seeing a friendly face regularly was good for her – I feel like patients don’t get checked up on and asked how they are nearly often enough, but also fair enough because the nurses must be way too busy. I shouldn’t see her again because I’m headed to Tamworth and am not returning to hospital until the end of Easter break, so I hope that she’s not still in hospital when I return but I will think of her and remember her just because I followed her case closely and saw her more than once.

One of the nurses needed one of her files for handover so I only had one to check and there wasn’t a lot to add to my personal notes, so I just hung around and waited for Zet to finish copying down information about his patient. Then we headed to the station together. It was fun to chat to him on the train, he is friendly and very complimentary about my role in bringing the hospital group together by organizing events, which was a nice boost to the ego. I learned a bit about his girlfriend in Malaysia and we just generally chatted which was nice because I really like him and haven’t really bonded much with him because he was sick before with Influenza B.

Once he had left me to take his bus home, I was waiting at the bus stop when my sporadic recovering cough started up again. The lady sitting at the stop next to me purposely angled herself away from me and edged further away with each cough which was a bit offensive really because I wasn’t even coughing in her direction and I wasn’t doing it on purpose. But then turns out she was digging in her handbag for a eucalyptus drop which she gave to me and watched me eat. She said she had been sick with the flu recently, so she had them on hand and wanted me to have it. I thanked her and ate it even though I hate eucalyptus-flavoured things and really did not want to put it in my mouth. Then we boarded the bus and I had to sit the entire bus ride back with it burning a hole in my cheek and filling my mouth with its terrible taste every time I switched it between cheeks. Very unpleasant.

I spat it in the bin as soon as I got off the bus and headed to Coles to buy the groceries for cooking tonight. I was shocked at the price of ribs (so expensive!) and disappointed that Coles doesn’t appear to sell Chia pods, but I bought plenty of snacks and ingredients for dinner and that was uneventful. Then at the bus stop, this elderly lady struck up a conversation by asking me if I had been riding (confusing, because where would I have been riding? Centennial Park? The Racecourse? Do I look like a jockey?) and I replied that I was a med student hence my outfit. She was excited by this because her 2 children were healthcare professionals – her daughter is a neurologist in London and her son is a psychiatrist. I asked her if they enjoyed their jobs and she told me that her daughter loved her job, but it was a bit draining for her son being surrounded by sad people all the time. At this point the bus came and turns out we were on the same bus, so we were able to continue our conversation on the bus. I learned she lives on Beach St. by the Pav and that she used to work in finance and worked as a financial manager in Thailand for 5 years. Because there was nowhere on the bus to put my groceries down, I was holding them at an awkward angle, and by then my constant shifting meant that they were taking on more and more awkward angles as they jostled against each other. By the time we reached the Spot, my block of butter had gone rogue and fallen out of its plastic bag, along with a receipt and the elderly man sitting on my other side tried to help me pick it up. The elderly lady was keen to help me by offering me another plastic bag (I didn’t need one because the butter had just fallen out of the bag, the bag hadn’t broken or anything) and busied herself digging in her backpack for her spare one – meanwhile the elderly man offered me one of his spare plastic bags (do all elderly people just have spare plastic bags lying around or something?) and took this as his opportunity to start talking to me about how useless the plastic bags at Coles are and how often they break and that I should purchase one of those green linen ones from the counter as they were only a dollar etc. etc. Thankfully by the end of this conversation it was time to get off the bus because I had done more than enough socializing with elderly people for the day. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed it and it did help me pass the time, but I was a bit drained by the long day by this point. The lady said I might see her by the beach one time and I think that would be funny, but I doubt I’d recognize her again by this point.

Then it was time to cook my barbecue-flavour ribs and the fennel rocket salad and the rice. Cooking has gotten progressively faster and sort of easier, but I rang my mum as I did it which added a bit to the challenge. Mum was in good spirits but was really concerned by the fact that I was oven-roasting the ribs instead of braising them because she said they’d just dry out, so she pressured me into cooking them the way we cook roast lamb and adding wine, chicken stock and onions to the bottom to add moisture. I was a bit worried about it being too wet and the conflicting tastes when added to the marinade, but I went along with it. Apart from that the cooking went quite well and mum hung up by the time Kate came home so it was like I was never alone :’). Lucky Kate came back when she did because my ribs weren’t cooking so well but Kate helped me line them along the side of the tin so that they would cook better. They tasted fantastic which was great, and the moisture didn’t really all absorb but it could then be poured on the rice for more flavour as well as some extra red onion to eat so it was all very good.

Dinner with the fam was nice and Veronica did the dishes (I noticed) because Josh had an assignment due. Afterwards the three of us headed down to Coog for a quick walk which was nice. Kate wanted to go to the Pav but I had gone barefoot and without my wallet so that wasn’t happening anytime soon. Instead we wandered back up past Little Jack Horner’s where they had a live performer playing. Kate wanted his contact for her birthday, so I got his card. We stopped at an ATM for Veronica to withdraw money and we offered/were asked to speak at Kate’s 21st which will be exciting but also scary. I have to write a funny speech, so I better get thinking of funny things that Kate has done – it’s just hard to think of them but even though she’s a very straight person I’m sure we’ve done funny things. Surely. The pressure’s on anyway. Then we wandered into Woolworths because Veronica wanted ice creams. Kate and her both bought boxes and I mooched a Maxibon off Veronica even though I really did not need it given I was about to bake a cake when we got back. I had a coughing fit towards the top of the hill near our house and I was so worried I’d vomit the Maxibon out but I managed to hold it all in.

Then I baked my raspberry coconut cake (which will be very flat because it’s in a rectangular cake tin) while Kate does watercolour painting in her room – potentially for class? I am unsure. The cake smells good and the batter tasted lit, so I am pumped. We have some random pop music that seems to future primarily women in it playing and I am sitting on her bed typing this out. Now I’m going to go check up on the cake and post this before heading to bed.

Tomorrow’s another busy day, I have 2 classes and I may be hanging out with Will, plus I’m catching up with Cate at Max Brenner and the Malaysians are throwing a Hotpot Night for the hospital group! I am excited. ‘Till next time!

[fashiontrendin-blog]

The Psychology of Ghosting and Why People Can’t Stop Doing It

http://fashion-trendin.com/the-psychology-of-ghosting-and-why-people-cant-stop-doing-it/

The Psychology of Ghosting and Why People Can’t Stop Doing It

My ghost is named Tom.

He’s persistent, this ghost. He likes haunting my dreams, catching me off-guard in the milk-sweet land of sleep, slipping into my unconscious and rattling the cage of my brain. I dream he’s back in my life, unapologetic and unreformed, still cheating and gaslighting and drinking too much. In these dreams, I am still desperate for answers, asking him over and over why he vanished, why he gave up his flesh-and-blood self and became this ghost that — even after seven years, three new cities, countless dates and the love of a good man, the best I’ve ever known — I still can’t shake.

Ghosting (the term we’ve assigned to the sudden disappearance of a romantic interest) has become synonymous with modern romance: A 2016 Plenty of Fish survey revealed 78% of users had been ghosted. When I did my own Insta-investigation, I received dozens of responses, ranging from righteous indignation to extreme chill. “Rude but inescapable” seems to be the general agreement among those I spoke to about ghosting in the age of online dating.

It’s not that the dating “slow fade” is new (one girl told me she had a friend in high school who called it “two-weeking”: After hooking up with a girl, he’d ignore her entirely for two weeks — just long enough, he said, for her to get the picture), but technology has shifted the landscape by presenting a version of the world that feels both impossibly small and intoxicatingly large. One unreturned letter in the 1800s and you could warm yourself at night with the strong odds that he perished of scurvy; now, we’re able to see our ghosts out in the world, eating brunch, Instagram Story-ing the weird bird they saw on the walk to work. Combine that with the inherent dehumanization of online dating, in which complex individuals are reduced to swipeable avatars, and what we’ve created is a flourishing breeding ground for people for whom honest, direct communication feels not only unpalatable but unnecessary.

F. Diane Barth, a New York-based psychotherapist and the author of the new book I Know How You Feel: The Joy and Heartbreak of Friendship in Women’s Lives, says that while ghosting as we understand it isn’t new, the way we have pathologized it is. “In the past, a person could stop calling or dropping by,” she says, “but now we have so many more ways of disconnecting from a person, like being unfriended or unfollowed.” Online dating also provides the comfort blanket of partial anonymity: There likely aren’t mutual friends to call you out on your callous behavior, nor shared physical spaces that force interaction. “Our communities are larger now,” says Barth, “so it’s entirely possible you might never, ever run into them again.”

The Anatomy of the Ghosted

Modern ghosting can impart a distinct and isolating feeling of shame for those who experience it. “People who have been ghosted often feel that they are the person who has done something wrong,” says Barth. “You’ve been dropped off the edge of the earth, which is very traumatic. You don’t think about how many other people this has happened to, but rather that there must be something wrong with you.”

Barth notes that shame is the brain’s natural reaction when “something or someone interrupts us in the middle of doing something we are enjoying.” Our natural instinct is to “undo the situation” so we can get back to that feeling of happiness. When we can’t — when we are, in fact, cut off completely from the source of the good feeling — we look for ways to explain away the bad feelings: She didn’t want to commit, he didn’t like my laugh. “No matter how you explain it to yourself, though,” writes Barth, “your psyche is trying to undo the sense of disruption of the good feelings. Shame is a reaction to having a circuit in your emotional system broken.”

Am I not funny? Do people not get my jokes?

It’s a very particular wound and one that is becoming inescapably familiar. Former online dater and ghostee Kelsey says her primary reaction to being ghosted was the feeling that she must be the problem. “We’re obsessed with fine-tuning and laboring over our superficial appearances (both in-person and online),” she says. “So when we’re ghosted, I think we often jump to trying to figure out what in that outer shell wasn’t well-received, and we let that disapproval soak into our inner layers that define us. We cycle through our insecurities. … Oh shit, did he not think that was funny? Am I not funny? Do people not get my jokes? Oh crap, is that what I’m giving off?”

The shame is compounded by a feeling of being duped. Alexandra was ghosted by a guy she’d been dating for a few weeks. “On our first date, we talked for six hours straight and ended it in a moonlit make-out,” she says. “He talked about cooking together after we had sex in my kitchen. We went on mini field trips — to the beach! to the cliffs! — and had after-work check-ins where he’d call me on his way home to hear about my day. And then, one day, he went from telling me he was addicted to me to only speaking if spoken to. He would weasel out of committing to a plan. He would hit me with a ‘Hey!’ on the Sunday evening of a weekend where he’d assured me he would be seeing me.”

Eventually, she says, she’d had enough. “I told him I was an adult and needed planning, that I couldn’t just keep my schedule endlessly open for him on the off chance he was free. He apologized, promised he’d do better, promised we’d see each other with more regularity. But it dwindled until our interactions were reduced to him watching my Insta Stories while I was halfway across the world on a hiking trip.”

She’s now happily cohabitating with someone else but still has trouble shaking the experience. “I think he was dishonest about how he felt about me, which made me feel like a fool. And yet he didn’t have the strength to just tell me.”

The Anatomy of the Ghoster

To state the obvious: It’s rude, plain and simple, to fail to consider another person’s feelings. We’re talking preschool lessons, the golden rule. We all learned this. So why do the ghosts ghost?

“For me, the motivation was rooted in a strong aversion to being honest about my emotions, usually for fear of hurting feelings,” says Andy, reforming ghoster. “I found that it was easier to let silence do the talking than force myself to utter, ‘I had a nice time, but I don’t feel a connection’ or whatever you’re supposed to say.”

Others, like the man I have decided to spend my life with, are less apologetic. “It was the path of least resistance,” he says. “It was often because I’ve met someone else [Author’s note: It me.], and I’m just anticipating that awkward conversation and want to avoid it. When it’s someone you haven’t been dating long or you’ve been casual with, I think that there is this emerging establishment of a new norm, which is just — that’s now the way we break up with people. I do think that it’s kinder than telling someone you’re not interested in them or that you met someone better.”

He’s not alone in this; numerous people I spoke to said that in our dating universe, ghosting is both acceptable and even considerate. “It’s almost polite if the relationship was casual enough,” says Aubrey, a former ghoster and ghostee (now married). “There is something humiliating and patronizing in a dude I’ve gone out with twice ‘breaking up’ with me.”

Ghosting seems like a cop-out for people to avoid adult conversations.

Andy, turning over his new leaf, says he gives himself a pep talk before communicating his emotions to keep himself from ghosting. “The question I ask myself when the situation arises is: What’s the absolute worst thing that can happen after telling someone you don’t want to go out again? Maybe they’d be like ‘Fuck you!! You’re a sad pathetic loser! Boy bye.’ I can live with that.”

Barth agrees that some explanation is (almost) always better than none at all. “People say they ghost because ‘they didn’t want to hurt feelings.’ And yes, people who are broken up with directly will likely experience some hurt, but the thing about ghosting is that there’s no closure.” Ghosting, she says, leaves the person who was ghosted with the humiliating impression that whatever relationship they believed existed was all in their head, that they were not worth so much as a farewell text.

Julia, happily single and dating, made it a practice to always offer an explanation after a blind date called her out at a party six months later for not responding to her texts. “I had to sneak out of the party because she wouldn’t drop it,” she says. “I have a hard rule now that I always send a text to say if I don’t want to hang again. It’s awkward, but it saves the drama.”

When I was first dating in New York, I found myself making up excuses and dodging calls to avoid telling guys I didn’t want to see them again. At the time, I was terrified of seeming rude or unlikable, and the attention I received (whether wanted or not) felt like an affirmation that I was worthy and wouldn’t be alone forever. Eventually, the stress of trying to be likable while simultaneously dodging contact became absurd. A few friends and I collaborated on a standard text we’d send when we didn’t want to see someone again (please feel free to borrow, copyright not necessary, works for all genders, just trying to do the lord’s work): “Thanks for a great night! I didn’t feel any romantic energy between us, but I wish you all the best out there.”

Some (again, I’m MARRYING this man) argue that silence is, in fact, an answer of its own. “If you text someone once, twice, and they don’t respond — I mean, that is a response. That speaks very loudly. You just don’t want to hear it.”

The Anatomy of Closure

But the problem with silence is that it leaves a deep, dark hole — one it is all too easy to fill with a foggy combination of insecurity, self-loathing and confusion.

Lauren was platonically ghosted by someone she considered one of her closest friends. “I literally did almost everything with her,” she tells me. “And then one day, she just quit calling and texting and responding to me. And then she unfollowed me on all social. … It was heartbreaking.” There were signs, in hindsight, that this woman had a callous streak; still, Lauren said, she’s unable to come up with any explanation for her behavior, and years later, it still feels like a betrayal. “I feel like I’m a pretty nice and reasonable person, so if something were wrong, I feel as though she should have discussed it with me,” she said. “Ghosting seems like a cop-out for people to avoid adult conversations.”

In the absence of closure, what we are left with is a bewildering array of questions — questions that, it’s important to remember, might never be answered even if the relationship had ended on our own terms. “Relationships are always two-sided, and we can’t know everything that is going on in the other person,” reminds Barth. “If you’ve asked for closure and they haven’t been able to provide it, you’re going to stay stuck if you keep asking. You need to give up the idea that it can be solved.”

Barth recommends talking openly to friends about your experience. “Keeping [ghosting] to yourself increases the feeling of hurt and pain and isolation,” she says. “The more you can talk about it, the more you can get feedback that will help you process it.” Building this support system can also remind you of all the connections you do have: strong, beautiful friendships, a loving family, coworkers who respect you — relationships that rely not on superficialities, but on another person seeing you fully and embracing who you really are. “You need to work really hard to remember that it isn’t about you,” says Barth. “The reason that someone [ghosted] — it’s their difficulty in having to be honest.”

After multiple ghostings through online dating, Kelsey deleted her apps. Getting over being ghosted was going to require a new outlook, she realized. “It took some time and a lot of distraction, but I was finally able to ask myself the underlying question — why were these strangers making me feel bad about myself? Why was I giving up my sense of worth as a companion entirely to this pool of bachelors? Why was my vulnerability extending to all aspects of self, instead of just limiting it to what it actually was — the viability of compatibility with this particular individual?”

When she did start dating again, she says, it felt completely different. “I wasn’t checking the app constantly. I wasn’t eager to swipe and double-tap and labor over the wittiest retort. I didn’t feel the need to calculate the perfect time between responses and, most importantly, I didn’t fill the idle time with all of the reasons I had come to believe he thought I wasn’t worth it. I went out on dates and gave myself one rule of my own — hang out with guys if it sounds fun, and if it doesn’t sound fun, then don’t.”

And when she wasn’t interested? “I would tough it up and politely decline a follow-up date,” she says. “I did that both in-person and over texts, and both are uncomfortable but important. And every guy I did that to replied with appreciation and understanding.”

My ghost and I dated for eight years, and then we didn’t. Tom stopped coming home at night, stopped answering the phone and moved all of his belongings out of our apartment while I was out of town. It wasn’t as linear as all that, of course — he’d call crying or show up unexpectedly and then disappear again over the course of a few months — but when he finally did leave for good, when I found out he had been sleeping with his best friend’s girlfriend, the closest I ever got to an explanation was, “I just can’t do this anymore.”

He’s still out there — married, balding, in the city where I left him — but we haven’t spoken since. I do not imagine he ever thinks of me. I hate that I am the one left with these questions, although maybe what I am really left with is simply my own obstinate feeling that I was owed more than what I got. I have filled the space he left behind with narratives I wrote to suit my own purposes, but the truth is, humans are just bad sometimes. We do bad things — things we said we’d never do. Sometimes, the simplest, kindest thing you can do is try to explain why.

Illustrations by Gabrielle Lamontagne.

[thetruthisinthetooth]

Untitled Jeff x Annie WIP - Sneak Peek.

So I started writing this fic a zillion years ago, after season 3. I thought I had lost it after I changed phones but a few months back I found it in my email account, so I guess thank you Google. Anyway this is basically an Au because Annie and Jeff both are lawyers and work together. Pierce is alive and Troy and Britta are together. I don't know when I'm going to post the whole first chapter but this is just a glimpse. All mistakes are mine bc it's unbetad. (Am I writing a million things at once for different fandoms? Well yes I am!)

Enjoy

[MORE]

He poured two glasses of whiskey, smirking he gave it to her. They'd won a huge case for the firm, so they were celebrating. He sat next to her, as he gazed at her smiling with their eyes that way they only know how and drank in silence. He was staring at her not realizing it; she, on the other hand, was staring at space deep in her thoughts so she didn't realize he was staring at her or maybe she did but she was so used to it that she'd found a way to live with it, not that she minded. Jeff kept gazing at her, he couldn't believe that was Annie, his Annie. She grew up to be a great beautiful woman in and out. After her internship in the FBI, she realized that she wanted more that investigating left her with unresolved cases, she felt that she wasn't the one putting the bad guys to jail even though she helped. So after debating long with him, she had decided to become a lawyer. She started an internship in a law firm as soon as she could and soon Jeff was following her lead. Teaching just wasn't for him, even though he tried. Well, half-tried. 

He really let her go and he couldn't be prouder of her. They went back to old habits fast after she came back from the internship and although there had been a kiss or two after that, there was always one of them that said it was a mistake and that was that, after a little bit of awkwardness things went back to normal: stolen glances and friendship. They loved working together and hanging out but at the end of the day so much time had passed that maybe there was no point in doing something that might ruin their friendship. They were so important to each other that they couldn't even think of losing one another and for what? A relationship that might have ended up hurting each other, no thanks. Of course all of this was never really spoken between them because that was what they did, they'd talk about everything but about them and the Annie of it all not so much.

- "Wanna grab some dinner?" He suddenly said, breaking the silence

- "Oh, I can't!" She frowned. "I'm sorry I didn't know you wanted to go out! I made plans already" - she said apologetic 

- "With Mcdouche?" He said in a plain voice not trying to show how much he hated the guy

- "Yeah with him! Stop calling him like that!" She said as she swatted his arm.

-"What? Mcdouche? But if it goes so well with his face and his stupid hair" 

Annie squinted her eyes at him between amused and angry. And suddenly a spark appeared in her eye as a realization came upon her

-"Wait! Have you been watching my Grey's Anatomy DVDs I left in your house?"

-"Whaat? No! I don't watch that crap. It's for girls and men that clearly are gay," he answers in a strangely high voice and big eyes which avoid her inquiring gaze"

-"Ok, fine, fine! - she said standing up, her hands up in mock surrender. As she headed for the door, she turned around and said:  "By the way, Mcsteamy has better hair than you"

- "No, he doesn't!!! I have 10 times the hair and body than that cheating bastard." At that moment he closed his eyes, realizing he let her know he perfectly knew who Mcsteamy was. Damn him, damn her! 

-"Night Jeff! Have fun at Seattle Grace" - she said as a snort came out trying to control her laughter.

- "I don't watch that crappy show!" He shouted back to her.

- "You doooo!" She shouted singing as she left. 

-"I don't" he said almost whispering and pouting as he got ready to go home. His cell caught his attention while it vibrates on his desk: 

Annie: you do! ;)

Damn her, he thought smiling.