#though also it might just be both having very similar green-heavy album covers

[acidhydra101]

my ears are currently occupied by Stereolab - Dots and Loops but I must advocate for MINT JAMS DAY anyways.

do you know what day it is today?

that’s right, it’s the 4th annual MINT JAMS DAY and you have to listen to mint jams at least once today. we’re all counting on you.

[yuminsung]

NCT 2020: SYNERGY (my wishes for an album)

I was positive we were getting an NCT 2020 comeback at the start of the year, however now I have realised I am a clown. So, instead, I have spent longer than I should’ve creating an album filled with stuff that I would like to see.

I want to preface this with the fact that I have no qualifications in anything related to music / album design / production or anything like that, this is just based on my opinions as a fan of music and NCT.

I’m gonna split this into 4 sections to kinda separate my thoughts, and so it’s easier to navigate.

1. TITLE

NCT 2018s album is titled EMPATHY, the definition of this being “the ability to understand and share the feelings of another”. I think SM chose this to reflect how NCT 2018 was an amalgamation of 127, DREAM, and U. I wanted to try and keep this theme for NCT 2020, though expand on it due to the addition of WAYV. 

SYNERGY is defined as “the combined power of a group when they are working together, that is greater than the total power achieved by each working separately”. To be honest, I think the word ‘synergy’ perfectly sums up NCT’s concept of sub-units, so it would be a good choice for NCT 2020s album’s title due to its meaning as well as its similarity to ‘empathy’ sound-wise. 

2. ALBUM COVER 

The album cover for EMPATHY was very bright, like all the colours of the rainbow, but still very minimalistic and kinda futuristic? The NCT vibe. I think their second album would suit a slightly more mature design, and as I have no talent in design, I’m going to use existing album covers to give an idea of what i think would work well.

If SM was to go down the route of a similar album cover, I think the best example is the 1975′s newest album:

It still has the text elements that were prominent on EMPATHY’s cover, while being more minimalistic in colour (aside from the yellow side panel which would theoretically be bright neobong green).

If they were to go along a different route to EMPATHY, I think this album cover by Paris Jones could work well for NCT 2020:

If the background surface was black, a polaroid of all 21 members could be a simple but effective album cover. 

In terms of promotional photos, this scene from the WAYV ‘Regular’ MV is my first thought:

Photos taken on a set like this, with all the members dotted about the room and maybe the album title + members’ names repeated across the screens could work well to give off the futuristic NCT vibe. 

3. TITLE TRACK / CONCEPT 

I can’t create a whole album’s worth of songs, so for the next two sections all the songs mentioned are going to be from existing artists. I’m not trying in anyway to suggest that “NCT would do it better” or that NCT should release the exact songs mentioned - I’m just using these songs to represent the styles I would like to see NCT explore. 

Title Track: GETTING CLOSER - SEVENTEEN 

I think SVT are a really good example of having a lot of members that all have the opportunity to shine. Getting Closer is that bitch, like the line distribution is spot-on and the choreography is one of my all-time favourites. 

Black on Black was mainly instrumental to highlight the performance ability of NCT 2018. Getting Closer is reminiscent of BoB in its powerful nature, but would be able to show NCT 2018′s growth into NCT 2020, with further vocal / rap capabilities showcased alongside the previously established performance talent.

The concepts of BoB and Getting Closer are already similar, so this wouldn’t be anything out of NCT’s / SM’s comfort zone, and would also work towards establishing a dark & powerful ‘brand’ for when all sub-units perform together as one. 

Special Stage: UH-OH - (G)-IDLE

I would like to see NCT 2020 do something a little bit different than ‘powerful’ for the special stage. Uh-Oh has a really chilled kinda west-coast vibe that I think NCT are yet to fully explore in any sub-unit but could absolutely pull off. It would be a stage where they could genuinely have fun performing all together. 

I imagine the stage being done in a way similar to Growl by EXO in that certain groups of members come onto the stage for different verses, then all come on together for the final chorus.

The styling for Uh-Oh is kinda summer streetwear. The best equivalent I’ve found for a boy group in this style is ATEEZ Wave era.

This shows kinda how I think the styling for this stage should be, in particular Jongho, Yunho, and Mingi. Just think lots of colour, street brands, and denim. 

Getting Closer and Uh-Oh are the only songs on the album where I’ve put all 21 members on the same track. 

4. TRACKLIST 

I have no talent when it comes to album design / composition or anything like that, but I tried to create a sort of theme / flow between the songs I picked for the album. NCT songs I’d liken the overall theme to are ‘Love Song’ from Neo Zone, ‘Love Again’ from Reload, and ‘YESTODAY’ from Empathy. 

I’ve used an intro, interlude, and outro to show progression of NCT 2020 through the album, with these 3 songs getting more upbeat one by one. Though extremely cringey, I guess I was trying to emulate them growing happier through being together as a group.

Aside from the two tracks mentioned above that feature all members, the rest of the songs are split into sub-units, whether it be pre-existing unofficial units within NCT or a selection of members I think suit the style of a certain song. I have not included any official NCT sub-units on this album, as that was done in EMPATHY. I’d like this to be one big NCT U album, where we get the members in combinations we’d otherwise never get to hear performing together. 

The Tracklist: 

INTRO: The Unknown Guest (DEAN)

Members: Xiaojun

Xiaojun is a beyond amazing singer (he is my joint favourite vocalist in NCT). This song has an old feel, it’s almost haunting, and I really think Xiaojun’s voice would suit such a song perfectly. Xiaojun performing an intro of this style alone would open the album well and give him the time to shine he deserves !

Track 1: Getting Closer (SVT)

Members: All

(Explained above)

Track 2: CHILLI (SVT)

Members: Rap Line (Taeyong, Johnny*, WinWin*, Lucas, Mark, Hendery, Jaemin, YangYang, Jeno, Jisung*)

I might have completely forgotten some songs but I don’t think NCT have ever released a rap-heavy song of this style. I would love to see them do a rap song with this sort of relaxed vibe - it would show off diversity in their rapping abilities and would be a fun concept to see.

*I know Johnny, WinWin, and Jisung are in both the vocal and rap lines, but I’ve chosen to include them on the rap line track rather than the vocal line track as I think they suit the vibe of this track better than the vocal track. Plus, it would give the three of them more lines (god knows they need them) if they were on this track rather than with the vocal line :)

Track 3: Uh Oh (G-IDLE)

Members: All

(Explained above) 

Track 4: The Truth Untold (BTS)

Members: Vocal Line (Taeil, Yuta, Doyoung, Kun, Ten, Jaehyun, Jungwoo, Xiaojun, Renjun, Haechan, Chenle)

Although NCT has released ballads before, I would love to hear members from different subunits singing together. Like, imagine Renjun, Xiaojun, and Jungwoo on the SAME track - the power. Taeil and Chenle harmonising? Iconic.

Track 5: Spotlight (1the9)

Members: Foreign Swaggers / English-Speaking Line (Johnny, Ten, Jaehyun, Hendery, Xiaojun, Mark, YangYang)

I know Xiaojun, Hendery, and YangYang aren’t technically in the Foreign Swaggers, but I feel like spiritually they are. I wanna see 6 of them causing havoc while Jaehyun spectates (https://youtu.be/acsjfk4cz1U). A song with a playful vibe, not necessarily in English, would suit these members well.

INTERLUDE: Dayfly (DEAN)

Members: Taeil, Taeyong, Kun, Doyoung, Jungwoo

I don’t have any reasoning for why I’ve chosen these specific members for this song other than the fact I think the style suits them well. I think the 5 of them together on an interlude with a relaxed feel would just be a really calming break in the album.  

Track 6: Vibe (1Team)

Members: Taeyong, Yuta, Jungwoo, Jeno, Jaemin, Haechan, Jisung

This is quite a broad range of members in terms of age but I don’t think that matters as each of their styles would suit a song like this. A relaxed style and structure similar to the one this song has would allow each of them to shine, as it’s nearly an equal split of rappers to vocalists.

Track 7: Retro Future (Triple H)

Members: Johnny, Ten

Baby Don’t Stop 2.0. I can just imagine these two singing a song like this and having so much fun. A JohnTen duet track is giving the gays (read @incorrectnct​ ) not only what they want, but what they deserve. 

Track 8: Base Line (J-HOPE)

Members: 99 Line (Lucas, Mark, Hendery, Xiaojun)

The 99 line is 3/4 rappers so a song that is rap-heavy in style would best showcase their ability. We’ve heard Mark and Lucas together during EMPATHY era, and Lucas with Hendery and Xiaojun in WAYV, so I have no doubts the 4 would work together. Plus, rapper Xiaojun could be something that we don’t yet have but definitely need. 

Track 9: Focus on Me (JUS2)

Members: 97 Line (Jaehyun, WinWin)

These two are made for a sexy concept like the style of this song, and their voices complement each-others’ so well. I always felt Jaehyun was one of the members of 127 WinWin was most comfortable around, so their existing chemistry would make a track together even better. 

Track 10: Second Life (SVT)

Members: China Line (Kun, WinWin, Lucas, Hendery, Xiaojun, Renjun, YangYang, Chenle)

They have the range.

Track 11: New Rules (TXT)

Members: 00 Line (Haechan, Renjun, YangYang, Jaemin, Jeno)

A song with a fun feel to it like this is the only way to go for the 00 line. They are almost an even split of rappers and vocalists, so a song like this would allow each member to shine. I know any song with these 5 together would make me smile while listening to it. 

OUTRO: Blue Side (J-HOPE)*

Members: Yuta

Imagine if SM gave Yuta his own solo track,, just kidding,,, unless? But for real, Yuta has managed to prove how talented an artist he is despite SM only giving him 2 lines and 8 seconds of screen time each comeback, so imagine how amazing a whole song by him would be.

*Song will be in Japanese.

FINAL THOUGHTS

I tried to split the members evenly between tracks, which I know is unrealistic but is what we want to see (SM please let Mark, Taeyong, and Haechan rest). I’m not sure if we’ll ever get another full group album, I’ve heard some people saying it will be NCT 2021 for 21 members, like the 18 members for NCT 2018. Regardless, making this made me feel happy thinking about the possible interactions and the songs that could come from it. 

If you’ve made it this far thank you for sticking with my jumbled thought process. Please message me if you have any thoughts about anything in this post or just about NCT ot21 in general :) 

[masquerade-story]

Chapter 1 - Moving In

"Whose dumb idea was it to go camping like this anyway?" Grey grumbled, smacking away a tree branch that seemed determined to get friendly with his face.

Walking behind him, his twin sister Lillian rolled her eyes and poked the small of her brother's back. "Yours. It was your idea."

"Oh please Crystal! Please oh please might we go live at the haunted house in the woods where we'll certainly perish! I, Dorian Grey Duvall, swear on my sister's honor to let you protect me!" Rayne fluttered her eyelashes, lowering her voice to sound more like Dorian. She yanked the handcart she was dragging over a set of roots, careful to steady its contents before resuming her walk.

"Has to swear on my honor cuz he doesn't have any of his own left after the last time," Lillian snickered, while Grey pointedly ignored their teasing and continued clearing the overgrown path.

Bringing up the rear with a digital camera trained on everyone's back, Crystal grinned and panned the camera to take in the large, dense trees, and huge, leafy bushes. "For a haunted forest, it's actually pretty nice here. Ah, more meadow rue! Specifically thalictrum rochebrunianum, neat."

"Gesundheit," Rayne said, eliciting giggles from the group.

"The lacy one over there with the purple flowers," Crystal clarified. "There's some rue anemone and meadow rue 'splendide' around here too. Don't touch the white flowery plant up ahead by the way, it's giant hogweed. The leaves and sap can give you phytophotodermatitis, making you blister up in the sun."

"Bro, how do you remember any of this? And as for you, you're a scary bitch," Grey cringed away from the plant in question while swearing at it, narrowing his eyes suspiciously at its pretty little flower clusters.

"I read a lot."

"Me too, doesn't mean I absorb any of it! I spent like six hours on Wikipedia the other day, don't even fully remember what I looked up."

"Was it about The Hobbit or Merlin? Cuz that's all you ever look up."

"Look, Lils. I know I'm walking in the front and all, but you don't need to stab me in the back like that. Also sometimes it's Pacific Rim, thank you very much."

"Was it Pacific Rim?"

"No it was The Hobbit."

The group talking and laughing were the self-proclaimed 'Fairy Rock' band Aos Sí Echtrae. Each of them wore a hiking backpack containing personal items, while Rayne also tugged along a sturdy handcart holding supplies and instruments with ease - a drum kit, harp, bouzouki, and keyboard piled up alongside some smaller instruments and the camping stuff Crystal insisted they bring along.

Though their banter was light-hearted and comfortable, they took their excursion very seriously. After all, they'd temporarily rented a locally infamous haunted house to use for a music video! It was a large investment, but they'd become popular online and had enough supporters that they were able to fulfill one of their member's dearest dreams.

Dorian Duvall, or Grey as he preferred to be called by friends, and his twin sister Lillian Duvall played bouzouki and keyboard respectively. Both had the same willowy stature, button nose and almond eye shape, but despite their similarities they both gave off very different impressions. Where Lillian looked soft and gentle, with large doe-like green eyes, and a kind smile, Grey had a mischievous glint in his hazel eyes and a roguish grin that he utilized with careless abandon. Lillian wore her sleek black hair long and loose, falling down past her waist and kept away from her face by a cloth headband, while Grey wore his hair in a high ponytail decorated with small braids.

As the one who absolutely loved haunted houses and anything spooky, it was Grey's idea to film on location for their new Halloween-themed album, Masquerade. Though it was the middle of July, they were hoping to get everything ready for an September promotional release before the album dropped in October, and so hurriedly set up for their video shoot in order to give themselves plenty of time for editing.

All four of them worked together to compose their music, write lyrics, and design stage costumes as well as fan merchandise. They also lacked anything resembling a lead vocalist, taking turns depending on what sound worked best with each song, and preferring harmonies rather than solos.

"Ray! There's a log up here!" Grey called out suddenly, kicking the fallen tree blocking their path. Rayne grunted acknowledgment, and shuffled around Lillian to help move the obstruction.

Rayne Rose played the drums, and also did a majority of the heavy lifting due to being the strongest person present in any room that didn't involve professional weightlifters. Her muscular arms were covered with watercolor flower tattoos, which she proudly showed off by refusing to wear any shirt with sleeves. Her curly hair, dyed a gradient of aqua blue and purple, was cropped close to her face for summertime weather. The short style purposefully revealed ear gauges and more than a dozen total ear piercings, matching the many piercings on her brows, lips, and nose.

The twins had fresh yet roguish charms, while Rayne had a more heroic air with heavy brows and an intense black gaze over lips naturally curved into an amused smirk. She dusted off her hands after tossing the log aside with little effort, while Grey panted for breath from the exertion of merely helping her lift it. Crystal, for her part, made sure to get the whole thing on video for future blackmail purposes.

Crystal Rose, Rayne's older sister, played the harp. Unlike her athletic and statuesque sister, Crystal was on the soft and plump side. Her long, wavy blonde hair was pulled back into a messy twist to keep it off her neck, the ends still pink from the last time she dyed it. Her face was round and childish, with bluish gray eyes above an upturned nose and broad cheekbones, unremarkable features made more charming by her innate overwhelming charisma and natural exuberance.

She was the kind of person that random strangers would strike up a conversation with, lost kids would try to hold her hand, wild animals would approach like an old friend, and when she raised her voice even the most crowded room would quiet down. She was also the kind of person who got carded when buying alcohol despite being thirty years of age, due to what Grey dubbed 'Acute Babyface Syndrome'.

"Anyone need to clean their glasses?" Crystal asked, pulling a cloth from her pocket to swipe hers clean. Aside from Rayne, who wore her contacts, Grey and Lillian both opted to wear glasses for the hike so they wouldn't have to worry about losing a contact forever if they tripped - a serious and ever-present concern for the slightly clumsy twins.

"I'm good!"

"Not yet, thanks."

"I'll take it," Rayne said, keeping her expression blank, and Crystal narrowed her eyes.

"If you wipe your sweaty face with the glasses cloth I'll push you into the patch of poison ivy over there."

"Ope, nevermind then."

The haunted house was a thirty minute hike from the nearest road, along a mostly uphill path that hardly anyone ever used and certainly wasn't wide or steady enough for any automobiles. By the time they reached the stone fence encircling the house's enormous overgrown yard, everyone except Rayne was ready to collapse.

"I'm gonna be so in shape after this if my binder doesn't kill me first," Grey wheezed, leaning on the stone fence and looking up at the haunted house of his dreams with a longing yet exhausted expression. It stood atop a hill in the distance, surrounded by several acres worth of mostly empty property speckled by a few large trees and scraggly bushes. Behind it was a small barn, a chicken coop that hadn't seen use in ages, and a greenhouse conspicuously lacking anything actually green. "A stone brick cottage in the middle of the woods overgrown by vines, a sagging peaked roof with exposed beams, and gaping windows whose panes are cracked like spiderwebs... Looks spooky enough! If the door doesn't creak ominously when we open it, I'm filing a complaint."

Rayne pulled the handcart into the yard, then glanced over her shoulder at Crystal, who was panning the camera up to take a wide shot of the house from just inside the fence gate. "How's it feel, Coco?"

Crystal frowned, furrowing her brows. All four of them believed in the supernatural after they all experienced several strange circumstances growing up, and Crystal had long proven to have abilities that most people would've considered fake nonsense.

She kept a dream diary after experiencing incidents where she'd dream events before they occurred, and wanted to prove to herself it wasn't a figment of her imagination. Whenever something weird happened, she was the first to alert everyone and get them away from danger before anything bad happened, and had an uncanny sense of whether people were lying.

"Hard to say. It does feel... Weird. The walk through the whole forest was fine, but as soon as I walked into the yard... The air's different."

"Really?" Grey raised his eyebrows, hopping over the fence and holding out his arms. He was the second most sensitive to any external oddities, with a particular penchant for finding rather nasty unexplained phenomena. After a few seconds he frowned as well. "No, yeah. That's a weird vibe for sure. It's like, the forest was fine and funky fresh, then you get over here and it's..."

"Musty," Crystal and Grey finished at the same time, and exchanged wry smiles.

"Could be trepidation from perceived fears," Lillian pointed out, gesturing toward the house. Though she also believed in the supernatural, Lillian also liked trying to find reasonable explanations before resorting to the occult. "The big empty windows feel eerie because people expect houses to be brighter and look more lived in, right? It's possible it's just a subconscious response to an old, dilapidated building."

"Dilapidated..." Rayne muttered, raising her eyebrows as she surveyed the house. She had a sensitivity to people's emotions and motivations, and could sometimes pick up lingering feelings from objects, but she didn't feel anything in particular coming from the building. "I don't think it looks that bad? We've lived in worse."

"It hurts me, physically, every time you and Crystal tell us about that kind of thing," Lillian sighed, patting her hand over her heart while Grey nodded next to her. "This place looks gross! It's horrible to imagine little Ray and little Coco in a place even worse than this..."

"Hey, they hired someone to clean the inside and arrange some basic furniture for us to use," Grey said. "It won't be fancy, but the interior shouldn't be too gross! And we'll sleep in the same room for safety! After all... This is the Corpse Consuming Cottage!"

"Ugh, that name..." Crystal and Rayne both cringed at the same time, while Lillian's eyebrows shot up.

"Wait, it's called what?!"

"Yup! Bad, right? But it's earned the name cuz of how many people have gone missing here. Poof! Gone without a trace! Every single person who's ever bought this place has disappeared, along with any family they brought along." Grey grinned, wiggling his fingers at his suddenly horrified twin. "I even made a spooky spreadsheet citing all my sources, aren't you proud? It's legit, this place is either hella haunted or hella cursed."

"Will we be okay!?" Lillian muttered, color draining from her cheeks.

"There's a loophole," Rayne said, and Crystal nodded.

"Yeah, we didn't buy the house. We're just renting. Supernatural stories are always big sticklers on rules, right? Chanting something three times, turning a certain way, walking a certain pattern. If buying the house is part of the problem, then renting it shouldn't be counted as the same thing because possession isn't being transferred." Crystal turned the camera to zoom in on poor Lillian's pale face, hiding her mischievous grin behind the lens. "Theoretically."

"Don't even pretend you aren't absolutely terrified too, Miss I Can't Go On The Haunted House Ride At The Amusement Park I Have A Doctor's Note," Grey scoffed.

"I don't like ghosts or wraiths or poltergeists or whatever wicked whatsits terrorize the night because I feel bad for them thanks very much, but..." Crystal glanced over at the house and frowned, furrowing her brow again. "I feel bothered but not... Threatened? Like there's something here watching but it won't hurt us."

"That's as good as a gold star to me. Let's crack this bitch open and make some lunch!" With renewed vigor, Grey fished the key from his shorts pocket and ran up the creaky old porch to the front door. "Come on in, it's nice and cool inside! Comparatively speaking, I don't think there's an air conditioner. Just fans. But it'll be clean!"

Like he'd promised, the interior was cleaner than the exterior condition belied. Furniture was sparse, but they were all fine wood antiques with a hand-polished sheen. Everyone dropped their backpacks in the foyer and stretched for a moment before getting to work.

"Water's on!" Grey called from the kitchen, where he set the tap to run. "There's dishes and cookware in here too!"

"Silverware?" Lillian called back, in the middle of helping Crystal and Rayne unload the handcart.

"Yup, as requested! I think they're all antique like the rest of everything here."

"Don't you dare break any antique dishes, Dorian Grey!"

"No promises!"

"Electricity works," Crystal said with some surprise, flicking a nearby switch after setting her harp case on the floor in the living room, alongside a towering pile of boxes holding personal things they'd had delivered via the realtor. She held her breath to listen for any crackles or pops, but the overhead light didn't give so much as a flicker. "Wires might actually be okay? That's surprising, this house is really old. Must've been recently renovated."

"Probably to try and reel in prospective buyers," Rayne said, setting down three drum cases. The rest of her kit was already unloaded, so she took a moment to glance around the living room with Crystal. "Inside looks much nicer than outside."

"We can make it look spookier with filters and editing," Crystal said, running her finger against the windowsill. When it came up without dust, she furrowed her brows. "They were real thorough cleaning this place."

"Found the terrifying cellar!" Grey's faint muffled cry echoed from somewhere in the house, followed by the sound of Lillian shouting his full name and charging off after him.

"Any cold spots?" Crystal shouted down the stairs after circling the entire bottom floor trying to find them. The cellar door was tucked into the kitchen's pantry, which was a full walk-in room rather than a little cabinet.

Since the house was so far from town, part of the rental contract involved the current real estate agent making sure the kitchen was stocked before tenants took over. All the shelves were packed full with newly purchased dry goods and spices, mostly sorted into pretty glass jars for aesthetic appeal.

"No cold spots, just some nice shelving, big old ground freezer and a wine rack! Fruit preserves and stuff but they didn't leave any complimentary wine. Zero out of ten, not recommended."

"What makes it terrifying then?"

"Big spiders."

Crystal grimaced and backed away from the cellar door, narrowly evading Lillian as she retreated up the stairs at maximum speed.

The house was surprisingly large. The ground floor had a large open kitchen with an attached breakfast room, a living room, a dining room, a sitting room, a study with empty floor-to-ceiling bookshelves alongside display cabinets, and a laundry/changing room attached to a bathroom with an enormous sunken bath large enough to be used as a hot tub.

"I would buy this house just for the tub," Lillian said, stroking the porcelain with obvious affection.

"Please don't," Grey muttered. "We're evading the horrible disappearance curse via fairy loopholes, don't you go walking into the trap face-first like that!"

"Fine, but when we leave, we're bringing the tub with us."

"Yeah sure that's completely feasible and not at all slightly insane."

The upper floor had five large bedrooms with attached changing rooms, two lavatories, and a walk-in storage closet. Rayne carried their bags into the master bedroom, then returned to the handcart to retrieve the extra supplies they brought - a couple of brand new air mattresses, blankets, boxes of instant food, tents in case the house was in worse shape than expected, a first aid kit, and little tools like scissors, binoculars, and lighters.

"This place is supposed to be super haunted and cursed, yet..." Rayne hummed to herself, patting the mattress in the master bedroom. Every bed in the house was neatly made, with clean sheets and blankets that still smelled like soap. "Won't need the air mattresses. They really worked hard to make this place nice, huh?"

Finally, the attic under the peaked roof had a few small gaps in the shingles, but otherwise lacked any signs of weathering or exposure damage. The only things occupying the space were a few cobwebs in the darkest corners. "Ugh, nothing for us to snoop through," Grey muttered, poking his head into the attic for only moment before heading back downstairs to start moving boxes from the living room into various bedrooms for later sorting.

Crystal and Rayne turned the fans on in all the rooms to start circulating air, opening windows on the shaded side of the house to catch any stray breezes, while Lillian and Grey got started on making lunch. The house which stood empty for so long soon filled with laughter, conversation, and the smell of good food.

"I just can't get over how unhaunted this haunted house is," Grey lamented, tapping a fork against his empty plate. "I've been looking and there's not so much as a suspiciously shadowed corner or creaky stair board!"

"Are you sure those disappearances were legit?" Lillian asked, gesturing for Crystal to pass the salt so she could douse her potato salad. "You checked the sources themselves, right?"

"I did! That's why it's so weird!" Grey drained the remaining water from his glass, glaring down at the ice cubes rattling at the bottom. "Other than the terrible cell reception, weak internet signal, and our gut feelings, there's really no sign of anything being weird. I was promised jumpscares!"

"You were promised no such thing," Rayne muttered around a mouthful of grilled chicken sandwich, deftly capturing some lettuce before it escaped her lips and hit the table. "The outside looks spooky enough for use in our video, we can think of this like a vacation and relax for a bit until we have to leave."

"There's a barn out back, maybe that's haunted?" Crystal suggested, but Grey shook his head.

"I already checked... It's clean as a whistle. No disturbed earth or rattling rusty tools or anything!"

"Would you feel better if one of us got possessed by a demon?"

"Maybe. It'd have to be a really good possession though, if you're not crawling on the ceiling I want a refund."

"Oh, you're paying us?"

"Hell no, a refund of my feelings. My feelings!"

"Speaking of feelings, how do you feel, Coco? Lils?" Rayne interrupted just as Grey was about to get dramatic. "That was a doozy of a hike. You guys alright?"

Both Lillian and Crystal suffered from several health problems when they were younger, and were still weaker than the average person because of it. They had to work harder to remain healthy than most people did.

Lillian, since her mouth was full, flexed her arm and gave a thumbs up to show she was feeling alright. Once her mouth was clear of food, she added: "Mostly just sore, but nothing a long bath and some music won't cure!"

"Coco?"

Crystal gave a start, realizing she'd been staring out the nearest window for awhile and tuning out the conversation. She turned back to Rayne and smiled apologetically. "Sorry, what was that?"

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Just feel a bit woozy, I think."

"Sensing something weird?"

"Honestly? I don't know." Crystal sighed, opening a can of grape soda and pouring it into her glass. "I still feel like we're being watched. And..."

She hesitated, then shook her head. No matter how Grey tried to cajole the rest of the sentence from her, Crystal kept the rest of her thoughts to herself. If she felt they were in danger she wouldn't be so tight-lipped, so they dropped the subject and started discussing their upcoming album instead.

After lunch they moved several beds into one room, turning the master bedroom into a big slumber party area. The rest of the afternoon and early evening was spent getting video and photos of the house and its yard, trying to find the perfect angles for use during the actual performance recording.

Rayne gathered some logs for firewood after noticing a fire pit in the back with some carved stone benches surrounding it. Dinner consisted of an open flame barbecue using packaged meats they found in the fridge, and a few veggies and fruit rolled into foil packs.

"We've really gotta thank that agent lady," Grey said, reclining in his chair. "She really came through with the supplies! It's so good having a fully stocked kitchen from the start, I was worried we'd be having pancakes and instant ramen for days."

"I'll head to town tomorrow and grab more meat for the freezer in the cellar," Rayne said, chewing on a skewer of chicken. "It's got a little variety right now but I'd like to stock up so we don't have to make as many trips. You and Lils might be fine with rabbit food, but Crystal and I need that good good protein."

"We're natural carnivores," Crystal agreed.

"Is there anything else we need from the store?"

"Nah, I can't think of anything. There's like, four entire bags of toilet paper, and towels and wash cloths and soaps and detergent and even pads and stuff. Like, I know we paid for the service but the level of consideration is really impressive!"

Crystal stared into the flickering flames, watching the embers rise into the rapidly darkening sky only to flicker away among the stars. The strange feeling she'd had all day was building to a crescendo, swelling in her chest in anticipation of...

Something.

Rayne glanced over, nudging her sister in the arm. "Coco? You're out of it again."

Crystal nodded. She opened her mouth, closed it, then opened again. Seeing her strange behavior, Lillian and Grey both fell silent.

Finally, Crystal heaved a sigh and poked at the burning logs with a long stick. "Remember when we first posted the video for our band? It was uploading and we were all watching the loading bar while holding our breaths? How it felt?"

"Don't get nostalgic on me old man," Grey muttered. Though his tone was teasing, there was an affectionate smile on his face.

Lillian nodded and smiled. "It was so exciting and terrifying at the same time. Maybe nothing would happen, maybe we'd be one of many bands that never got any traction. But maybe... Maybe we'd get lucky."

"It was kind of a relief too," Rayne added, gesturing with the skewer in her hand. "Like, we did it! We made our first song, and did our first video, and were gonna show it to the world. It felt really real right then. All our hard work."

"Yeah... And remember what I said?" When they all shook their heads, Crystal chuckled and poked the fire hard enough to send a flurried shower of sparks into the air. "I said it felt like a change was coming. For better or worse, something big was about to happen."

"Right, right! We'd either succeed in our dream or fail absolutely, with no in-between. That's what you said, yeah?" Grey sighed, patting his full stomach. "I remember. Man, that was heavy. I couldn't even sleep that night, you know?"

"Is it happening again?" Lillian asked, her voice even softer than usual. "That feeling?"

"Yeah. I've felt that way all day. I thought maybe it's cuz we never did anything as big as this, renting a house and doing a whole video shoot on location, that maybe I was worried about how ambitious our idea was, but..." Crystal bit her lip, poking the fire again. She made a point of avoiding their gazes, focusing on the burning embers and crackling logs. "I think if we stay here tonight, there's no going back."

Silence reigned for a few minutes. Then, quietly, Rayne whispered: "Are we in danger?"

"It's not like that. It's just... A massive change, that feels... Overwhelming. This is bigger than the previous time."

"Bigger than chasing our dream?"

"Yeah."

Rayne reached over to grab Crystal's hand, while Grey hopped up and sprawled across Lillian's lap despite her protests. He just laughed and said, "What's that matter? No matter what happens tonight, tomorrow, or whatever! We'll get through it together like we always have. You and me, sweethearts. Us against the world!"

Crystal smiled and gently squeezed Rayne's hand. "Yeah. We'll be fine, no matter what."

Once dinner was finished, the fire fully smothered and the leftovers packed away for later, everyone did rock-paper-scissors to determine order of bathtub usage. One by one, they soaked away their worries, changed into the pajamas they brought, and crawled into one of the master bedroom's beds.

As midnight ticked over, a single shaft of light from the full moon filtered through the room's lacy curtains, illuminating their peaceful faces. The sleeping occupants remained blissfully unaware of the tendrils of fog creeping along the ground, emerging from the forest to wrap the entire house in a dome of mist.

Several hours later, as the first rays of dawn burst from the horizon, they were finally awoken by a piercing scream.

[fluidsf]

Sonic Picks 15 LEE CHAPMAN / WIM DEHAEN: VOICES & ALLUSIONS / BENIDORM HOTEL (2015) Reviewed format: Digital Album released on Genot Centre In this 15th volume of my Sonic Picks review series I got back a few years in Genot Centre's discography to 2015. This is one of their first releases, the split album VOICES & ALLUSIONS / BENIDORM HOTEL by LEE CHAPMAN / WIM DEHAEN. LEE CHAPMAN's composition VOICES is spread over 4 tracks and track 5 is his composition ALLUSIONS. WIM DEHAEN's long piece BENIDORM HOTEL is the last track, 6 on the album. The album download features track 1 in a 16-bit/44.1kHz CD quality file, tracks 2-4 are 24-bit/44.1kHz high resolution files, while track 6 is a 16-bit/44.1kHz CD quality file again and also includes the album cover in good resolution. Totalling at 1 hour 3 minutes playing time, this album is quite an intense journey of experimental ambiences with LEE CHAPMANS compositions going for a part based approach of various sonic pictures spread over his 5-track part, while WIM DEHAEN approaches his music in a more trance-inducing hypnotic kind of 30 minute Drone composition. FVAB0 kicks off the album as the first part of VOICES, a very subtle mysterious short piece, very heavy on sub frequencies that sounds like ghostly rumbles as well as what feels like a ghostly presence in an old abandoned house translated into just about audible sound. It's the start of what is about to be a quite mysterious ride of an album in general. FVAB1 is when the music starts to move into the more audible range of the spectrum and to me it had a bit of an odd feeling at the beginning. Indeed in the description of the album it talks about the aspect of media degradation that is an important element of VOICES' sound. Though even if you haven't read the description first, the effect the hissy and crackly distorted lo-fi sound of the music has is quite ghostly again and not unpleasant. Not presence like as in FVAB0 but more as a cloud of contious harmonic and subtly resonanting droning ambience, the crackles sounding quite like a crackling fireplace and the ever rising cycling melody in the vocal and glockenspiel like sounds float subtly into your mind feeling comfortable yet also like lost memories you can't quite recall. FVAB2 is the longest track by LEE CHAPMAN on the album and this one is hard to describe in what kind of sounds it features but the effect it has on me is definitely that of dreams, inside the mind. It's a very introspective but also overwhelming (in a positive sense) cloud of droning sound again made of various manipulation recordings, bells being recognizable but the other instruments (?) being so far manipulated / degraded they blend into the ambience or fade in and out from foreground to background. This piece feels like home, a feeling of "it's going to be alright", but also hints at an emotional struggle someone might have that has to be overcome. FVAB3 offers a more hopeful positive sound, even though the sound is degraded even more in this one, the hollow resonant fuzzy melody feels like the fire in the fireplace seen through diffuse glass, filtering the light and bringing good energy to you. Allusions then features a sound more minimal in composition with more looping of the degraded melodic layers and feels quite like a river stream seen or imagined from quite a big distance. The sonification of the ever continuing stream of water flowing and flowing clean and rich in a green landscape but also feeling strangely like memories of a life in a place you've never lived in before. The hiss also has a kind of feel of an AM radio station not quite in reach to it which adds a nice detail to the sound I found quite interesting to hear agin. Benidorm Hotel by Wim Dehaen then obviously features a bit of a different approach to the music than LEE CHAPMAN's piece but falls into a similar sound spectrum. Again the music is very drone ambience based, but on this rather lengthy 30:57 piece WIM DEHAEN shifts between moods, lost memories and thoughts more subtly and gradually though also keeping the drone quite consistent. The continuous sound of the drone stream does perhaps require some more time to dive into after the shorter piece before, but if you let the music intertwine or even manipulate your own thoughts it has quite a nice and mysterious effect on your state of mind. At the end the piece also gets pretty rumbly on the bass frequencies too, so while subtle the music definitely builds to some kind of climax too, though not in loudness necessarily, more in the perceived overall experience of it. Great entrancing closing piece to this inspiring and unique sounding album. VOICES & ALLUSIONS / BENIDORM HOTEL by LEE CHAPMAN / WIM DEHAEN is an excellent split album with an introspective yet also inviting calm and peaceful atmosphere that is full of far away thoughts and memories through its hazy and degraded clouds of drone ambiences. The compostions of both artists compliment eachother well to create a unique listening experience that also alters your state of mind in various interesting ways and translates the aspect of aging / degradation to music. A great album for listeners looking for music that approaches the sound of failing media in a unique way as well as listners who are looking for Ambient / experimental music with a more diffuse and abstracted sonic signature. Digital Album is available from the Genot Centre Bandcamp page here: https://genot.bandcamp.com/album/voices-allusions-benidorm-hotel

[gretagerwigarchive]

Here's How 'Lady Bird' Created an Iconic Teenage Bedroom From Scratch

by Laura Schocker, Mar 4, 2018. source: https://www.apartmenttherapy.com/lady-bird-set-design-bedroom-meaning-256361

The coming of age movie is a Hollywood staple, which often depicts a young woman whose story is defined by a romantic relationship. Part of what made this past year's Lady Bird so special is that its subtle telling of a teenage female experience—from tenuous mother/daughter relationships to shifting friendship dynamics—relied on Lady Bird's personal growth as the main storytelling device. Its actors have received plenty of accolades ahead of Sunday night's Oscars. But one supporting role we think deserves mentioning is Lady Bird's wonderfully-nostalgic, turn of the millennium bedroom.

The teenage bedroom is also often integral to the coming of age story (think: Frenchy's bedroom in Grease or Dawson's movie-poster plastered room in Dawson's Creek). And Lady Bird is no different — the room is both the site of and the refuge from parental fights, as well as an expression of her personality. "We really wanted to show that she was somebody who cared about things as much as she's going through these pains, and trying to fit in," production designer Chris Jones told Apartment Therapy. We spoke to Jones about how he, along with writer and director Greta Gerwig, set decorator Traci Spadorcia, and the rest of the team built those feelings from scratch in a real home in Van Nuys, California.

I read that Greta Gerwig said she wanted Lady Bird to "look like a memory." I think a lot of us have these very real memories about our teenage bedrooms—whether it's the posters that hung on the walls, or the books on the shelves, what we stashed in the desk drawers. How did you go about creating those memories from scratch for Lady Bird? What feelings were you trying to convey with the objects?

 We wanted the bedroom, most importantly, to show the layers of history that Lady Bird already had. The movie is about what happens to her throughout the film, but also what happened to her and what could happen to her in the future, that whole transitional period. We wanted the bedroom to feel like it was also in that transition and growing from something younger to something older.

We went looking for furniture that could be little girl furniture, but that she had kept. The desk in the corner was really an old white desk from, say the 80s and the 90s. Then the bed, it's missing a spindle here and missing a piece there, because it's been around for a long time. We wanted that to be the basic structure of the room. Then we built on top of that with the items that would be more teenage and more adult.

Why did you choose pink for the walls?

Greta and I had spoken about colors, and we wanted the entire film to have a pastel color palette, based on paintings by Wayne Thiebaud, a painter in Sacramento. When it came to her room, we talked about pink or purple. But purple is kind of a royal color, and pink is a bit more playful, and we felt that the character was more playful and strong.

The paint was something that we also thought might harken back to being a little girl, but it's a hip cool color. And it blended with her hair color that we had in the film. It was also very different, shockingly different, from the rest of the house. We did a lot of camera tests with the pink to make sure it was going to work, and to make sure it wasn't going to be too different from the rest of the house so it felt separate.

And how did you build on top of that?

When you work on a film with the budget that Lady Bird had, you can't always get everything you want. And one of the things that's hard to do in a room that's covered with all kinds of imagery like that, for a film or any kind of media, is getting the clearance on items you're showing. One of the things that was relatively inexpensive was album covers. We decided to pick music from the time to show bands she'd be interested in. There was a Bikini Kill cover, a Pixies cover—albums we thought would be cool in that time period and that Greta listened too as well.

We loved making it look like she was always working on something. Besides the art we found and made ourselves, one of the things that really added to the room and that she was proud of were those "Lady Bird for President" posters, and we ended up putting those on the walls too, and it just added to the mix. What was really cool was that we were designing those posters and doing samples for Greta early on, and we used construction papers and feathers and bird heads, until we decided to get kind of weird with it, which were the ones we ended up using in the film. But some of those early prototypes ended up being on the wall, and it was really a beautiful little addition because we tried to use birds throughout the film without being too heavy handed.

The messiness of the room felt very real. It reminded me of actually walking into a teenage bedroom. How did you create those layers?

We were working with April Napier, the costume designer, so we had the actual costumes she was wearing in the film in her closet. As we were doing that, we would find ourselves bringing the clothes in that wardrobe had on their racks, and we would lay them on the bed and start hanging them on the closet or getting them ready for the shot. We realized it was great that she hadn't put her clothes away. There's that whole scene where her mom comes in and is unhappy with the fact she's not taking care of her things.

Because the room has a very busy, jewel-like quality, we wanted to keep it messy. The clothing was a big part of it and the rest of it really came from the way the way the room is dressed. We wanted to get it chock full. We started sticking stickers and little plastic spiders, and hanging Mardi Gras beads from a lamp or whatever. Once that layering started to happen, it really began to give a cluttered, yet not-difficult-to-look-at feel.

Where did you source everything from?

All of the furniture actually came from two big prop houses at the studios. They have furniture that is not in the best shape, which we wanted and the nice thing is that you can rent it. But all the ephemera, all the little pieces, the stuff that filled the room—the day before we were supposed to shoot the first scene in that room, we all agreed that we didn't really have enough stuff. So I went to a store in Downtown LA called Moskatels. Moskatels had all the stickers, all the hearts, all the spiders, all the snakes, all the bird feathers, all the green, all the dead roses. Everything you see in that whole room, a lot of those little pieces came from Moskatels in one big shopping trip I took the morning of the shoot. Then all of us worked together to get it up on the walls.

 Any computers, phones, lights, clocks—any technology needed to feel just right. It's amazing to think that even in 2003, we barely had the phone technology we have now. Only 15 years ago, we were really lacking all the cords, cables, USBs, and chargers we have now.

What about the rest of her house? How did you design her room to be different in mood?

 There's this line about the house being from the other side of the tracks, which can be a negative reference. But for us, wherever they lived, we knew that Marion and the husband loved this house, and it had been their house for a long time. We wanted the house to feel well loved, not sad or disgusting. It was always neat, it was always clean, but it was a muted tone. It showed there was a bit of sadness in the house.

So Lady Bird grows up with that, and starts her life with that as a kid. I felt with all of the items on the walls in her room, and everything that filled the space, it really felt loved. The house also had that, but it wasn't so blatant. It was more about the care and the placement of items.

It seems like bedrooms always play such an important role in classic movies and TV shows. Why do you think they're such a storytelling staple?

It's a person's private zone. It's important to show the character's personality in the bedroom, because that is where they will spend a good portion of their young life. It is almost like your psyche; your bedroom becomes a place where you lie and look at the ceiling—it's the place where you look at your world and experience your world.

It's also the place you go to escape. When you want to go someplace to get away from it all, you tend to go to your bedroom and lock the door.

Do you have a favorite pop culture teenage bedroom?

Maybe Ferris Bueller's bedroom. I was really into music so the fact that John Hughes used music so effectively in his films and that Ferris Bueller had posters for Morrissey and all the bands that I was into, struck a chord with me.

What's funny is that as old as it is, The Brady Bunch boys' bedroom is very similar to the way I grew up with a brother. We had bunk beds and you spend a lot of time connecting and communicating with your siblings on those bunk beds. Even though it's a bit generic and less naturalistic, I still feel that—I can picture The Brady Bunch bedroom in my head to this day, which is odd, but good.

We talked a bit about Greta's influence on Lady Bird's bedroom. Were there any of your own childhood bedroom influences, or anyone else involved in making the film?

Traci Spadorcia, the set decorator—she did little things that were personal touches, like tying up a ribbon that didn't make sense why it was there, putting a picture at a certain angle, or layering one picture over another because that's what she had in her bedroom.

At the end of the movie, when she's moving out, Lady Bird paints over the walls. Can you talk a bit about what that literal fresh start symbolized for you?

That wasn't in the script. But when we talked about how we had to put the room back for the homeowner, Greta and I talked about how long it was going to take to get all of these little items off of the wall. And she said, "Why don't we all help?" And I said, "Yeah," laughingly, and I included Saoirse [Ronan, who played the title character]. And then we all started thinking about it, and we thought, well what if Saoirse and the mom were taking the items off the wall?

We decided the art department would take down quite a bit of it, but we would have them take over. It happened organically. Yes it's symbolizing the end of something, but also the beginning of something else, which Greta has talked a lot about in interviews. They did it together for a while, but then Saoirse just kept going, she just kept wanting to do it. It was really nice to get a lot of footage of her really making the room fresh and clean. It's almost like she cares now. Before it didn't seem like she cared, but she's leaving something for her mom, who she hasn't spoken to much for the summer.

It's not just change, it's a clean slate. It means she's going to go on to something new. And in the next few scenes, you see she starts using her real name. She starts using Christine instead of Lady Bird after she does that change for herself.

[harryimaginedstories]

Snowflake

This short little blogmas-story is inspired by the song “Snowflake” by Sia.  Honestly I spent today baking and playing Sia’s Christmas album and I would recommend everybody to do the same. 

Plot: H needs his lover to understand that their love won’t melt like snowflakes do.  Warnings: It’s a bit angsty but romantic as well. 

The picture isn’t mine but ho ho ho hocares? 

It was almost as if my body was frozen in place, as I sat rigid and still on the comfortable armchair facing the big window in Harry’s home. He had a great house, one that gave him a grand view over some of one of London’s calmer streets as well as parts of Regent’s park. It was silly, but I connected many many memories of our relationship to this piece of glass and the view it let me see. The first time I let him take me to his home, I’d been so caught up and impressed by the mere size of the window, that we ended up sitting down on the hardwood floor right in front of it where we spent all night talking about everything we didn’t know about each other yet. Both of us had originally expected to be doing something more physically engaging throughout the night, but getting to know him on a deeper level was just as nice and meaningful. The memory still made me smile and feel a sense of warmth I found difficult to describe. Harry made me feel like I mattered to him, he made me feel that way even before we were close with each other. I’d taught him how to make mulled wine once, later that same year, right after the first snowflakes fell from the sky and we’d enjoyed our cups while watching how the world outside got painted white.  In the upcoming years there’d been many Christmases in London, where we waited in vain for the snow to come, but when I thought about spending the festive season with Harry, I remembered that first evening spent admiring the classical white Christmas in a home that made me feel warm and happy without even being mine. Today hadn’t been too nice. The only time I felt a small smile pull at my lips, was when I watched Harry, clumsy as well as very stubborn Harry, try to tie a string of Christmas lights to one of the trees outside his home. He’d been determined to reach the very top of the tree and it was funny to watch him stumble with his too big feet, but of course I’d also rushed to the door and kissed the scratch he’d earned when falling to the ground harshly.  Afterwards I went to sit back down and look outside. Harry joined me for a bit, then he went about his work and spent a good two hours watching TV.  I wasn’t upset, but quiet and stuck in my mind, a state Harry knew well and he was aware that it was best for him to give me a bit of space. He wasn’t too concerned and respected what I needed, though after not having heard more than a handful of sentences all day, he decided to try and make conversation with me. 

“Y/N?” 

I turned to look at him. Harry stood few feet away from me, a shy smile on his soft lips that grew once I sent him a small wave. “Would you like me to order something from that Italian place you like?”

“Is it time for dinner already?” I wondered, faint surprise in my voice. 

Harry nodded. He was dressed comfy, a pair of light blue socks covered his feet, black jogging trousers his legs and a fluffy green jumper held his upper body warm. My heart squeezed at the image and my arms itched to wrap him into an embrace. My need to hold him and I feel that everything would be okay.

“Funny how messy my sense of time gets when the sun sets so early in the day,” I sighed.

He chuckled softly. “Mine does, too.”

Slowly he stepped closer until he reached where my chair was. The flash of relief crossing his face didn’t go unnoticed when I held out my hand for him to take and I gave him the warmest and most genuine smile I could master when he crouched down before my knees.

“What’s going on in that head of yours, dearest?” 

His green eyes held warmth and peered up at me with timid interest, as he was careful not to push me too much. 

“Don’t say that,” I breathed, “’Dearest’ makes it sound like we’re old.” 

It was remarkable really, how easily Harry managed to make my mood a better one and how he could warm my insides only by looking at me. He was just... magical. I couldn’t be thankful enough to have him by my side. Harry raised the hand of mine he was holding and pressed a loving kiss to the back of it. 

“But you are my dearest person,” he insisted, warm breath fanning over my skin, “It’s you I love the most.”

The speed of my heart increased and his eyes fell shut once my own fingers found the locks crowning his head. 

“You can call me that in a few years then,” I offered and Harry nodded eagerly before commenting that sometimes his forehead looked so wrinkly he might as well be an old man already. 

We stayed silent for a moment. Then Harry sighed and leaned his head into my touch. “Want to tell me how I can make you feel better, love?”

I watched his eyes follow my movements as I sat up straighter and a tiny giggle fell from my mouth when he let himself fall back so he could sit on the floor.  We were going to have this conversation then, I thought, and when my worried expression met his loving one, I was reassured that he wouldn’t judge me for my thoughts. 

“I’m just,” I began, eyes drifting from his face and back to the London right outside his home, “wondering, you know?”

Harry began to play with my fingers softly, squeezing and massaging their tips, silently encouraging me to voice my thoughts and I suppressed a smile, when he made it even clearer that we wouldn’t move until I’d spilled what was on my mind.

I sighed. “I don’t want to upset you, Harry. Because I love you as much as you do me.” 

He frown briefly marked his pretty face. “Don’t worry about that.” A small kiss to my palm followed and my stomach fluttered at how incredibly warm and soft his lips felt against my heated skin.

I could spend forever kissing him. In fact, we’d shared our very first kiss on an evening similar to this one, though we’d spend most of it dancing where now was my chair and our conversations hadn’t been as heavy with worry as it was now. But the place was the same, another lovely memory.  Behind Harry the window’s glass was gently touched by thousands of little snowflakes. I found myself wishing they’d freeze and decorate the window forever, but instead they melted and left nothing but dots of water behind.  This let me find my words. “I sometimes think of you and me... like we’re two snowflakes. Or our relationship is one, I’m not sure. Together we drift through our lives and when we’re together it seems as if we do better. You keep me sane, Harry. Can’t thank you enough, my love, you make me so happy. And I just... find myself wondering how much longer I have to enjoy winter with you, you know? I ask myself when the first rays of sun that are too hot will come and I’m scared to find out how we’ll be. If we’ll be at all or if our relationship will just melt and end in a puddle of water.” 

The longer I spoke and the more words he let fall from my lips, the softer his expression got. Harry’s kind eyes focused on my face and whenever I hesitated or quieted down, the smile he gave me encouraged me to voice more of what was going on in my head. 

“I love you so much,” I promised, nothing but adoration in my tone and Harry nodded shortly. 

Harry kissed my wrist. “I know you do, Y/N. Don’t worry.”

“And I don’t doubt us.”

I wished I sounded stronger and guilt flooded through me. I didn’t want to make him feel as crappy as I had all day, because truly it wasn’t that I doubted Harry and my relationship. I couldn’t understand what had made my mood sink as low as it had. A deep breath left his mouth and when he moved to sit up I felt like a cold bucket of water had been dropped over my head. I expected him to run out on me or at least yell for how little my faith in him I held, but just when I was about to apologize, Harry leaned forward and pressed both hands to my ribs.  He tried not to tickle me but chuckled when I shrieked, before he gently pulled me from my seat and made me stand in front of him. He smiled softly. Without hesitation Harry raised both of my arms and I happily complied and wrapped them around his shoulders and as always I found more comfort in his embrace as I could’ve anywhere else. My face found its familiar place in the warm space between his shoulder and neck and Harry, too, pressed is head against my collarbones with a sigh. I felt him kiss my skin softly.

“You’re the prettiest snowflake. Quite warm for one, too.” 

The darkness outside grew and the living room was illuminated only by the soft lights coming in through the glass. Harry’s back was coloured golden. It suited him, I found.

“And I’m keeping you right here.”

“Harry,” I whimpered and he shushed me. 

“M’not finished. I don’t think you and I would melt, baby, even if the sun got stronger. I think what we have is strong enough to withstand any kind of heat. You,” Harry took a deep breath and wrapped both arms around my waist tightly, “You mean the most to me, Y/N. You’re my lover and I am yours. It’ll be winter as long as we make it so.”

My head rolled back and my eyes fell shut. His words wrapped themselves around my heart and filled it with immense strength.  I pressed a kiss to his cheek noisily.

“We spend so much time laughing together,” Harry murmured, “I think you’re the first person who ever made my tummy hurt because I was laughing for so long.”

“I love you so much,” I breathed into his ear and slung my arms around his neck with a stronger hold, “And m’keeping you, too.”

He chuckled softly.

“It’s not the time yet,” Harry purred into my neck, “But I know that I will keep you and one day I’ll ask you to let me show the world that you are the only person I want forever. You have to trust that we will spend so many more winters looking out this big window, Y/N. Sun won’t intervene, I promise you.”

I was sobbing before either of us knew it. The tears spilled onto my cheeks and there was no stopping them, not even when Harry sealed his promise by pressing a kiss to my mouth. 

Harry gasped softly. “You’re shaking. Oh, love! Oh, sweet Y/N, no. Don’t. No tears, baby, don’t do that to me.”

“I love you so much,” I repeated, a heavy sob followed my words and Harry reached up to scratch the back of my head, “I do. I truly, really do.”

“Love you as well,” he whispered and when his lips pressed to mine I leaned forward to deepen the kiss. 

It was as if my heart could burst with hope and love and... certainty.  I had the man of my dreams in my arms, right there for me to hold and kiss. Harry was my best friend, my lover and a piece of my own heart. And it was true what he’d said, though we kept each other warm, as long as I had his devotion and he had mine, for us there would always be winter. 

Personally, I love it! Let me know what you thought!

Masterlist

Christmas Harry