#this...actually gave me a lot of new insights into their characters lol

[treesandwords]

Dalion kids playing DnD

Disclaimer: I have never played DnD, just been researching it a bunch and really *want* to play. So anyway I'm obsessed and couldn't get this out of my brains.

Laedir: Doesn't really understand it, but goes along because he wants to make his siblings happy. Probably plays a monk or some kind of spellcaster. Does pretty poorly in combat, prefers to chat with NPCs

Quinnton: Is the DM. And honestly probably fantastic at his job. Definitely does voices. Super immersive in his worldbuilding style. If playing he'd probably be a paladin.

Bronwyn: Didn't want to play at first but gets super attached to her character once she makes them. Probably either a druid (she secretly really really wants to shapeshift) or a fighter (let her kill things pls). Argues about rules.

Gevin: Plays either a rogue or a bard, 100% somewhere on the chaotic scale. Knows the rules better than the DM does but pretends he doesn't care, then pulls out some technicality when he needs it. Actually gets super into it and is a very animated (and smart) player, but in a really unhinged way.

Ciaran: Ok so I can see them having two games going at once - Ciaran plays in the older kids' game and also DMs for the younger ones. As a player he'd probably be a monk or a cleric, is a little bitter about not getting to DM because that's what he feels he's good at, and therefore argues with Quinnton a lot. Pretty rules-heavy, and as a DM runs rules-heavy games. Lots of worldbuilding but sometimes gets complaints that it's too complicated.

Jerod: Gets VERY into it. Probably makes art of his character, writes a 10 page backstory, all of that. Not really interested in combat though, and instead just wants to wander around exploring the world (which frustrates Ciaran to no end because You're Supposed To Do Things Actually). Probably just skimmed the rule book and doesn't know how most things work, he's just kind of along for the ride when it comes to the actual story and will go with whatever. At least he's passionate. He'd be a druid and try to talk to plants whenever he could.

Cassian: Definitely throws a fit when his character gets killed which Ciaran almost certainly did on purpose. Contrary to Jerod, he just wants to kill things. Probably stabs NPCs for no reason and tries to initiate PVP just because. Plays a wizard.

Nurei: Takes FOREVER to describe her character (probably a Cleric). Is the opposite of Cassian and wants to fix any bad situation they come across, even if it delays the main story. This annoys basically all the younger kids but Jerod. She's probably the one Cassian tries to PVP kill most often. Wants an animal companion Really Really Badly.

Esme: Definitely a fighter or barbarian, she's got pent up rage and is here to use it. Her and Cassian's characters probably team up and do chaotic stuff together. Would rather play in the older kids' game because she thinks Quinnton is better at DMing and gets bored of Ciaran's game.

What are your OCs like playing RPGs/board games together?

Taglist: @kaatiba

[gaiuskamilah]

Hi, I got a weird question. I always thought you had wonderful insights regarding Nia, especially about her relationship with faith and bodily autonomy (or lack thereof). I’m writing a book series and one of the main characters has Nia as her inspirations/references. I was wondering if you had more insights regarding this aspect of Nia because my character’s arc also centers around faith and bodily autonomy. One of your posts actually gave me the idea to have this character also be referred to as a “lamb”, much like Nia is 😊

haha thank you, i'm glad you like my ideas on nia! also sorry it took me forever to get to this ask 😭 i wanted to make it Really Good then got scared that i wasn't and stopped working on it. conquering that fear 2day

i think nia is an interesting case because she reflects how, despite how so many people are wronged the people in power within religious institutions, the faith can still mean so much to them, so much so that they will reinterpret the meanings and create new theology. this is reflected in christian liberation theology - many historical anti-colonial movements also had an ecclesiastical factor, particularly in ex-iberian colonies, where they reinterpreted the story of christ as aligned with the oppressed peoples instead of the typical theology espoused by colonial leaders. i see the parallels in nia with how she works to reform the temple of light and the religion of the light itself. she was raised in the temple, and with the temple still such a strong societal force, she chooses to stay and help in the way that she knows she can. it's also affected her as a person and it's tied to who she is. after three books, she is still "the priestess".

a little bit of a spoiler - in b3, nia says that ever since she found the truth about nifara and how she actually is, she's felt "closer to the light, to whatever the light truly is." i feel like that's symbolic of how nia's arc has played so far: she started out as a rule-abiding fellow, following the temple without hesitation, then she grew and had her faith tested, had her worth questioned by the temple and its teachings, and she found a better, more nuanced understanding of the world and of herself in the process. and that process allowed her to lead a newer understanding of the light away from nifara's leadership. she's still a priestess of the light, but a priestess who rejects the imperialist and oppressive foundations of nifara's light and who forges her own theology of it.

as for autonomy - this question was brought up as early as b1, where she's faced with the draining qualities of the light. then it's questioned again in b2 with her feeling frustrated that she's constantly babied and fussed over by the rest of the group. she's inexperienced compared to the rest of them, yes, but at some point it can feel condescending and overbearing and that's what she hates. her body's been used by the temple, then violated and used by the dreadlord, then she hides the fact that she goes shadow from the rest of group because of exactly the overbearing reaction she expected from the rest of the group. out of everyone in the group, it's nia who knows bodily exploitation the most, and yet some of their immediate reactions was to still police her use of magic after she had become more informed of the nature of magic. this has become rambly lol but her story of bodily autonomy is directly linked to finding the nature of magic, which is also tied to her understanding of her religion. a newer understanding of her religion, a new religion of the light in and of itself -> a newer understanding of her body and her bodily autonomy.

side note: aside from nia, valax's story in particular is very much tied to the idea of bodily autonomy, perhaps even more than nia with how overtly a theme it is wrt her transformations. they're quite similar!

i feel like a lot of this is Rambly Stuff so feel free to send in another ask/reply for anything in specifics; i love nia a lot <3

[strawberry-daiquiris]

AO3 Wrapped!

nobody tagged me in this hahahah i just wanted to keep a record like i did last year so this is a mash up of a couple of different versions (not figg as i first posted lol)

Works Published: 26 (including 1 anon fic)

Comment Threads: 791

Word Count: 222,139 (took jump right in out of the total because most of it was written/half was published in 2023 but ao3 includes it in the latest updated year for stats)

Top 3 Kudosed Fics:

(again... ignoring jump right in... sort of)

🏆 hard on the brakes

🥈 lay your open hand

🥉 something dumb to do

Top Word Count:

🏆 lay your open hand (51k)

🥈 still reserved for me (35k)

🥉 girls just wanna f1 tumblr fics (15k)

Top Ships:

🏆 landoscar

🥈 🥉 a tie between piastrell and piastrella, as it should be <3

and then some additional questions, cutting this for dash length purposes...

What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?  this one is so hard... last year i had a stand out because jump right in was (and still is) such a huge accomplishment. i guess i'm proud of still reserved for me because it's a continuation of a world i feel so happy in, and even though the readers have dropped off a lot i feel like i'm writing for a group of people who really Get and Love the two of them. it makes me proud to have managed to build something like that!!!

i'm also just proud of the sheer word count... insane... stupid... get a grip.

What work of yours got more feedback than you expected? oh 100% the piastrells... really didn't think anyone else apart from about 4 certified fellow freaks were going to be into them as a pairing, but i've had some lovely, insightful feedback about them and their relationship that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!!!!

What work was the quickest to write? just like last year i've got a few fics that were one session wonders. sun down and i'm feeling lifted aka help i think i fancy some driver's sisters, this (maybe not so now) anon when i was hit by the Future of F1, the tarkov nortrell and all of the andrea/oscar fics that were basically me working through my sport emotions, lol.

What work took you the longest to write?  i started the gdoc of what became lay your open hand in april and posted it december, but i was only properly working on it from some point in september. still reserved for me took the best part of two months as well. next year i have 3 wips i'd lke to actually finish that could steal the title tbh.

What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag? rule 63 babyyyyyy!!!! closely followed by age difference and magical realism, which tracks.

Your favourite character to write this year? toss up between oscar and max fewtrell, which explains nicely why the brittle fics are my highlights of 2024.

The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year? lando still stressing me out to this day... i think i am nearly there with the voice (although frightened of over using in case i fall into it sounding forced) but the rapidly changing state of mind on that man... i think i love him so much it's hard to feel like i ever capture him properly, the wriggly little wormy thing.

What’s one pairing you want to explore next year? i think there's a jendo in me bubbling below the surface.

Favourite work you wrote this year? oh i think i have already answered this by going on and on about it, but brittle it shakes, closely followed by something to sink your teeth into and a podium finish for float away like vapour.

ok sorry if you read this because it was LONG... i'm also going to make a few new years resolutions...

i'm going to get better at replying to comments and not feel shame if i go back and respond to ones from a while ago

stop being hard on yourself, stop deciding a fic is rubbish and then hate it/want to delete it, stop holding yourself to DEADLINES... it's not that deep, it's not a job, it's supposed to be FUN

i'm going to read more - i will stop saving fics for 'the best time for them' and start reading them when they come out so that i don't miss my chance.

[funarisjournal]

Nari's Tsukutabe Superlatives! (Part 2)

Comic Superlatives | General Superlatives

I love Tsukutabe, a lot. I don't know where I'd be right now if I never gave the comic a chance...but then, I also wonder what would've happened if I never gave the DRAMA a chance? The drama was the version that helped push me into actually making fanworks, after all! I was fighting a bad art block at the time, even when I started reading the comic. I almost didn't give the drama a chance because 1) I'm not that much of a fan of live-action adaptations anyway and 2) The first image I personally saw was a behind-the-scenes photo of Emi and Manami (in costume) peeking over that tree and I was like "...that doesn't FEEL like Nomoto and Kasuga" (well, of course, Nari, because that's ManaEmi, not NomoKasu). But I got assured by others who saw S1 it was good and I gave it a shot.

And now look at me, 11 months later lol

ANYWAY, here's the drama edition of my special Tsukutabe Superlative articles! I got some good ones here~

BEST EPISODE (TIE)

Keep feeling fascina-- *tomato'd*

Oh you can't make me choose between these two. You just can't! I already had to bring it down from, like, 6 other episodes, including the drama-originals, 25 and 26. But okay, let's gush about Episodes 18 and 30!

18 was a emotional roller coaster, oh my god. It's the one where Kasuga finally makes her decision to cut ties with her family. It was just her immediate blood at first, but eventually we learn it's basically completely cut off altogether. This was a challenging decision for her to make, but it was a smart one, and she just needed that extra support to show her that she isn't alone...and Nomoto gave it to her without hesitation. She has her own family - a chosen family - in Nomoto that will support her in the way a family should support one another. Augh~

30 is, well...The end (so far) of the drama. But it's a dang big one! Go out with a BANG! First hug! First kiss! They didn't even play-kiss, they touched lips! Awkwardly so, but they remained there for more than just a quick smooch! Honestly, the portrayal of the kiss makes sense for Nomoto and Kasuga at this stage in their relationships and lives (lives that never experienced love/dating for nearly 30 years). And of course, as you saw by the screenshot, I had to get the stupid meme I made (when I was sleep deprived) out of the way. Gotta pay homage to it.

BEST DIALOGUE

I specifically love the speech Kasuga gives to Nomoto in Episode 26. It gives good insight to her character that is only inferred in the comic. She reveals her weakness with socializing and how she's new to relationships and feels bad she seemingly made Nomoto uncomfortable (but she didn't. Nomoto reassures her of that).

BEST SCENE (Romantic)

I have to give it that extra descriptor because I definitely can't choose between things that are funny versus sensible. So let's start with this one, eh? NOT COUNTING THE KISS! I think that one is kind of one of those "default" winners, so we're moving to the next best moment - the moment of synchronization the two had during Valentine's dinner. The comic has this scene as well, but there was something a little extra to the drama version, especially hearing it aloud - from Nomoto cutting her version off when she realizes what happened to Kasuga's smile immediately afterward~

BEST SCENE (Comedic)

Episode 14 had a few hilarious gems since we got to see the two enjoy Setsubun together (wasn't covered in the comic) in a fun way. The one scene I always go back to, though, is the "makisu" brainfart scene. They both have amazing expressions and then have that little adorkable moment where they get fixated on the word for a bit after they hear it. Omg I love it lmao

BEST JACKET

Kasuga's jacket in the drama. I must have it. Somehow. I waaaaant it.

BEST NOMOTO REACTION

Manami Higa is a very expressive woman. I especially love how she can actually convey those comic-esque "😶" moments so easily, but Nomoto's reaction to Kasuga reaching over to remove the lint out of her hair has a lot of hilarious frames. These two in particular (from Episode 19) are my favorites - her 😶 moment while wearing Kasuga's oversized sweater (her hands in the sleeves!) and a "blink and you'll miss it" mouth twitch. Since they're within the same few seconds of a scene, I don't consider it a tie. Just showing off two frames lol

FAVORITE DISH (Drama-only)

While the comic did have a chapter on making pudding, it's not the same as this pumpkin pudding the ladies made together in Episode 4. It really looks good, man...I wanna try to make it someday.

FAVORITE TRACK

"murmur" is my favorite tune as it touches on a lot of little things I like in incidental music in general. It's simple...it has this vibe that feels like a calm "slice of life" tune, it uses a glockenspiel. I love the "innocence" sound of glockenspiels~ But really, it's all about the overall vibe. It really feels like "the simple things in life" with a dash of pleasant optimism and whimsy that just tickles my fancy.

FAVORITE BIT OF TRIVIA (Dramaverse)

The fact that studio/freelance musician Emi Nishino just kinda popped into everyone's lives at the right moment, from the producer as they were having difficulty scouting for someone that fit the Kasuga role (just happened to be at an AKKOGORILLA concert where Nishino was a backup musician) to Manami Higa, her way-more-famous co-star (Let's not forget all those times she calls Emi someone who "heals" her and "soothes" her and - affectionately - "That Person" in her life now)....While she's not Kasuga personality-wise, there sure is a lot of overlap in terms of how convenient they show up in people's lives and having much kindness for the people they hold dear!

FAVORITE BEHIND-THE-SCENES PHOTO

Needed something to replace the "favorite illustration" from the comic post lol, so here's my favorite photo...which was also really hard to choose, by the way! But the award had to go to this special piece Manami posted during her announcement for the preorders of the S2 DVD. This was during a break in between shots for the S2 promotional photos/posters. They're just goofing around, laughing it up. Manami taking hold of Emi's arm lovingly. The kicker is in her comment to this Reel: She loves Emi so much, she had moments where the line blurred between her being herself and being in-character as Nomoto!

FAVORITE FAN ART THAT I MADE (Dramaverse)

My favorite is actually a little "naughty" [Pic #5, btw] but I kept it SAFE for this post lol. So...this one kind of came and went real fast, sadly, so I don't think many noticed it. As you can see, I drew it for a double occasion that happened November 22nd: That day is known as "Good Couples Day" in Japan AND that was the date NHK decided to release S2 on DVD, so I paid tribute to the promotional photos and drew Nomoto and Kasuga out in that park they're in as Nomoto takes a selfie of them together.

I never would have thought I'd ever draw live-action fan art before, but this show did something to me. Even the early fan art I made that was clearly based on the drama had a more cartoony look or I just borrowed the comic designs, but when you view the show a few times, you begin to notice the nuances between versions... My brain refused to keep the two the same internally and I started draw work on capturing the actresses better but still keep my style intact. Just some fun introspective-y stuff.

FAVORITE DUMB MEME I MADE (Dramaverse) [TIE]

Mmm I sure love ManaEmi naan

But also... "Keep feeling, fascination~🎵" which always pops up whenever I talk about Episode 30 (well, ever since I first made this sleep deprived post lol)

So what's after this? There is one more part - the superlatives that can work for BOTH versions! Stuff that is more generalized and are shared between the works~ Stay tuned!

[demonsfate]

maybe somewhat controversial but saw somethin on a confessions blog saying this and i guess i do kinda miss when rping felt... sillier at times? like with both the existence of magic anons & dash commentaries. things just feel Stricter or More Serious now? not sure how to put it. dash commentaries do still happen, but not as frequently as i used to. like GOSH, i remember 5+ years ago, i'd have my character saying something bizarre and it would BLOW the entire dashboard up. like almost all my mutuals would be commenting on it, a lot of "silly drama" would happen because of it. some would agree with my muse, some would prosecute them. that doesn't really happen anymore. though, i also understand. i get that ppl have boundaries, but sometimes it really feels like you have to walk on eggshells lest you upset somebody.

i recalled one time this character was just being AWFUL to mine (mine who has done nothing wrong lol) just hurling insults, mistreating them, whateves. so y'know, there were dash commentaries about this and it eventually lead to the other mun getting very upset that their character was being "villainized". and it's like ... don't ... write an antagonistic muse if you don't want that? or the very least, don't write them BEING antagonistic toward innocent people? i mean, when ppl's muses & anons used to bully abaddon, i actually loved it. because indeed deserved it, he's a horrible horrible person who mistreats and kills the innocents. and plus it's just fun ok? i love conflict - regardless if it's angsty, serious, or silly conflict.

and magic anons... i get it can be a flawed concept. (ppl can send their Thinly Disguised Fetishes in it - not that i care but obvs other ppl would rightfully care) but i still thought it was very fun because it's like temporary or mini aus. it plunges characters into otherwise impossible scenarios and then give you new thread concepts based on those scenarios. i'd say even to this day, i still accept magic anons. but that feels pointless to say because they're virtually nonexistent anymore.

this was all i was gonna discuss in this post, but i can also understand why the rpc is often... less engaging anymore? why we have a problem with communication, why we have a problem with less anons being sent out. this isn't a generalization, of course - there are other reasons why this happens. but this is something i've personally experienced in the past, and it makes me think it could be the same for other people. it's just the fear of being blown up at, again - upsetting somebody.

i've seen people be legit hateful towards the anons they get A LOT. like an old rper i've stopped writing with would literally call the anons "assholes" and trying to "ruin fun" because the anons would just comment on the threads or ask questions regarding the threads? and it's like i thought that was supposed to be a common thing... anons like that just help add insight to how the muse is feeling regarding a thread or somethin. but the way they reacted was so unnecessary hostile? when they could've politely told anons to stop or just... fucking deleted the anons like lmao. and it's not just this too but i've seen other people just react bitterly to certain anons they get. or this one time where somebody REQUESTED for CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM and i sent an anon giving my criticism, can't remember quite what it was but obvs i said nothing mean or insulting - i just told them a problem i noticed and gave tips on how they could possibly improve (AGAIN, THEY ASKED FOR THIS) and they later went on their blog talking about how they got ANON HATE???? HELLO????? so yeah, i understand not liking certain anons you get or whatever. but ppl react to them with so much hostility, that it makes everyone else afraid to send anons anymore because they'd rather say nothing than upset the user, especially if they're gonna be potentially villainized for something that is virtually harmless.

then there is just talking to people ooc. hell, i've had somebody who followed one of my old blogs (this was like a few years ago iirc?) and their rules had that blood was one of their triggers. so i told them that i tag that so they don't have to worry and they literally said something like "I didn't ask you to :/" and that's it??? and then they were just rude to me the entire convo until we eventually unfollowed lol. not to mention all the skype & discord contacts i add over the years and then we just stop talking in no time...

anyway, i'm not saying everyone is like this at all! there are MANY super cool people in the rpc, many people i have a lotta fun writing with here. but when you look back at all the bad experiences, or even looking at the bad experiences at are currently unfolding, it makes more and more sense why a lotta the "silly" rp aspects that ceased to exist. why there are no more magic anons, and why dash commentary & anons in general are becoming more and more scarce.

it was this post that inspired me to talk about this. which i actually don't agree with everything op said. in fact, i wouldn't even say the primary issue of current threads is romance or smut. more so, i noticed that fluff / slice of life threads with no conflict is what makes up for most threads nowadays it seems lmao. which is also understandable, because again - it's a popular known issue within the rpc that it's hard to have conflict in threads, lest somebody legit gets their feelings hurt OOC!!! hell, this has happened to me a few times because i often play antagonistic muses. which again, is another issue that makes people feel like they're constantly walking on eggshells. but anyway, it just inspired me to think about and discuss this.

[ymiwritesstuff]

One thing I've realized about writing reader-insert fics is that you can't please everyone. It's a unique dilemma with this genre and while I personally try my best to be as vague about most things as possible, my, and quite frankly, no one's interpretation of the character of "Y/N" will never be fully accurate to everybody.

Back in my Wattpad days, I used to get kind of annoyed at some of the comments when they would point out how the way I described certain aspects of the reader wasn't at all like they were. I'm not talking about things related to appearance, I've always tried to keep that as neutral as possible, but more about personality things.

Say, I describe the reader as someone who doesn't know a lot about classical music, and a commenter would claim say something like "Well actually, my major is in music" or something of the sort. I'm not saying that's the commenter's fault, but I'd be lying if I said that I didn't feel a certain way about them. Granted I was a lot younger back then, so that was definitely a factor. It might be silly, but it made me feel like my work was being undermined or not taken as seriously as I may have hoped.

I was never a huge fan of the middle chapter comments on Wattpad anyway, but that's unrelated.

Nowadays, I try to keep things vague, which affects the story somewhat as you can't add certain depth that a unique personality could offer. It's impossible to cater to everybody, so I can only hope that the way I write the reader will resonate with most.

Of course, I'm not claiming that the reader cannot be written with a pre-determined personality in mind, those are a completely valid option.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that we try our best. And yes, even I make a note of a character trait that does not at all describe me, but I don't blame the author for using generalized and almost stereotypical features to describe the reader. That's just the easiest way to please everyone.

And frankly, I think that as authors we SHOULD do our best to be as inclusive as possible, in general, so no one feels left out.

It's a bit difficult, and like I said, only really an issue when writing this trope.

Anyway, hope that gave some new insights on this topic, I didn't really know what I wanted to say exactly, the words just came out lol. Feel free to share your thoughts!

[komilys]

Hello hello can I bug you about lore/story for your Selfship with Yuki and the other Sohmas? I saw you have Akito as your big sister and she's my daughter so I'd love to know about your self insert!!! If you're up to share!!!!

when i first got this ask i did write out a response in one of my writing applications, but then halloween happened and my computer broke and i lost my writing lol (still on a mission to get it back!) and then i got sad and gave up but i’m no longer sad! tysm sooo much for bugging me about them i love yuki and akito deeply <3

akito is my big sister! that’s so interesting u have her as your daughter, i would love to know if you have any lore :D

i think a fun little thing that doesn’t really play a huge role is that i’m only half-siblings with akito, i have no reasoning for doing this other than being able to explain my appearance differences from most of the other characters AND mostly, honestly, just because i thought it’d be really funny if ren was so petty over akira loving his daughter that she was like “i’ll get a new man! that’ll show him to cherish me!” and you know what? it is kinda funny to me still. even funnier that she got pregnant and decided to go through with the pregnancy out of spite, only for it to be born female, again, and akira fully accept the child as his own. i think this also kind of makes ren hate kyi differently than akito because she does like… hate her children. loathes them.

edit right before posting: ​a little tidbit i didn’t add in earlier but kyi is really hated by the sohma maid (the main one; i believe she’s nameless), which is mostly just fueled that she views kyi as not really important, just an extension of ren being a hindrance to the sohmas. also, because akira wasn’t alive long enough to significantly impact kyi directly, i don’t talk about him a lot, but i can imagine his vague treatment of kyi as a kind of second/extra-to-akito, did influence the maids/caretakers treatment of him after he passed.

but enough about ren hating her kids! (in the original writing i think i went more into it but i can’t remember, rip all my writing) let’s talk about akito and i!!!! my favourite codependent siblings!!!!

i don’t think it’s much of a surprise, especially given akito if you’ve watched the show, and kyi is pretty similar in some aspects. i dont’t believe the original manga nor either version of the show gave a ton of insight into akito’s childhood (we don’t even have a confirmed age, but i go off of around 3-4 year difference, i’m the same as the main three). honestly i need to work out the timeline better, because it’s a little wonky with canon only having a vague timeline of events. BUT a few key things i do want to work in to whenever i more or less solidfy lore!!:

kyi and yuki do meet and become friends around the first time akito and yuki meet (this was likely done on akito’s wishes, rather than kyi’s caretakers). kyi is also the one who pulls away from yuki later on, haven’t completely figured out why but i know it has to do with some bit of ren’s interference, which plays into a later bit between ren and kyi after the new year’s episode in s2. over the course of what the manga covers, yuki and i aren’t really explicitly together, in comparison to yuchi in canon, it’s more so just very apparent the two have feelings for each other but given that they’re both just starting to kind of come to terms with it and you know. adjusting to everything in their lives lol, though they are definitely together a little later on.

(there’s a lot more to our relationship i swear i just don’t want to this to turn too long 😭)

akito and kyi are like… by normal standards, at least… kind of really isolated from the outside world as children? the sohma complex is so large it was easy to stay inside, and i hc that they were actually homeschooled! and especially considering their social circles were very limited, with akito’s essentially being the zodiacs and the caretakers around the complex, and kyi’s being about a fraction of that. this changes as they grow up, obviously, but it lasts an unfortunate while. (no wonder these guys are so reliant on each other LOL, they literally have no one else). jokes aside, they do really care for each other, and akito does really love his younger sibling, but it’s also by no means the most healthiest relationship; kyi still bites his tongue and plays into akito’s god complex and inadvertantly encourages her destructive nature (think of how kureno chooses to stay despite it being worse for her).

oh my GOD i stole kureno’s storyline. (real, live reaction as i’m typing this at 3:03 am)

because as i’m typing this out you can basically just roughly imagine kureno’s bits in s2 and go hey!!! that’s kind of you?! both are officially introduced during the beach vacation arc, are somewhat unfamiliar with being outside of the estate and are constantly by akito’s side and accidentally encourage her abuse of the zodiacs by staying by her side and keeping quiet, AND their major breakaway from akito is a result of a future romantic partner. OHHH MY GOD I STOLE KURENO’S LIFE. OH YMGODnno.wait i can work with this. (i don’t really care either way i’m not a stickler for things like creating mary sue oc/self-inserts and etc.)

kureno, babes, i’m so sorry i stole your character </3

[chocosvt]

hi choco! i'm so excited to see you back on my tl; i've missed you and your god-tier fics & i'm super duper excited to read your wonwoo fic as well (140k words? we will all be well fed fr 🤲)

i had a little rant? not exactly rant but something that's been itching my mind a bit haha, i hope you don't mind me sharing it with you! i genuinely want some advice over this.

as a long fic writer, how do you consistently come back to writing your fic without getting bored? i looooove writing long fics too (big lover of slowburn and angst lol) but i always get so impatient and bored of writing the story so quickly :(

i'd posted a teaser for a fic a while back and it got a good amount of traction (something i will always be grateful for) and someone asked me when i would release the full fic, to which i gave them a tentative date. fast forward to the day before the day i said i would post the fic and you have me typing out paragraphs upon paragraphs of stuff that i absolutely loathe in my writing. i ended up posting the fic anyway, but it's been only a day and i already want to take it down—not bc it's not getting any attention, because it is, but more so bc i hate that fic and would do anything to rewrite it.

iirc your joshua fic, 'best friend's brother' was a rewrite of a fic you'd written earlier, right? was your thought process similar to this? where did you start your rewriting process from? did you have any second thoughts when you took it down the first time?

i'm really sorry if this is too many questions 😅 please take your time if you do choose to answer this! much love and have a great day, choco!!! thank you so much :)

(is it alright if i use an emoji to sign off so i can find this ask later?)

— 🍫

first of all, THANK U SO MUCH <3

and i don't mind at all! these are rly insightful questions :o though i'll just chunk my answers a bit so i'm not all over the place.

not getting bored to be honest, i'm not sure if i ever "get bored" of writing out the plot. but i definitely get burnt out, and sometimes i get downright sick of reviewing my own writing, to the point where i just have to close my laptop and walk away. i think the most important & overarching piece of advice i can give--not just in terms of long fics but any fic for that matter--is to never force anything & take breaks!

when i'm busy at uni, there are like 5 month breaks where i don't bother writing at all. i always think that the second i have free time, i should theoretically want to write, but sometimes i just don't. and i make peace with it bc i know the second i force anything i will end up hating it (also takes the fun & enjoyment out of the process).

i think if you're getting bored, it's probably a sign that your body & mind just isn't interested in writing at the moment. so i would step away & take a break and attempt to get your mind off the plot. i think that taking a break also invigorates your mind a bit and gives you newer, better ideas (at least from my experience).

bfb rewrite the reason i rewrote best friend's brother was bc the og fic was from 2016, when my writing style was completely different. i still liked the concept but naturally, as my writing grew, i just detested the way the old ver was written, which spurred me to create the rewrite.

i wanted to give the characters a lot more depth & beef up the plot, so the new fic is actually a lot different in comparison to the old one. i wasn't attempting to do a scene-for-scene rewrite--it was simply just my approach to an old concept that i felt i could now execute better.

as to how i went abt rewriting it, i just picked out moments from the old fic that i liked and built around them. for instance, i rly liked the "skipping stones" scene that shows some intimacy & tenderness between joshua and reader. but it can't just happen out the gate. so i had to figure out the typical "why, when, and how is this moment happening right now?" from scratch.

the thing with long fics for me, it honestly is a test of patience & dedication!! bc it can truly be so frustrating :( a lot of times, you want to jump right into the good parts bc those are like the shiny glimmers that make the fic attractive. but depending on how impactful you want those moments to be, build-up is sooooo key! the thing is, build-up is just so critical in my opinion, but it can also be such a pain to write :p

i find when i review my writing, these are scenes i criticize or change the most--more than the big, hard-hitting scenes. bc to me, it's such a specific thing that you have to nail down justttt right. it's a lot of thinking and finagling and i think this process is what i dread the most? especially when it refuses to turn out how you want it--ugh, so discouraging!! but once you get it's like a silky flowy river!!

the big takeaways (i guess?) 1. taking breaks is so important! 2. don't force anything xxxx 3. take the big moments & build around them i totallyyyyy understand your frustration!! there have been so many moments where i'm like I NEED TO WRITE AHHHHH and then i promptly open the document only to sit there, blankly read a few sentences, and then get this rly big sinking feeling in my gut that is essentially telling me "never mind" and honestly i just listen to it bc if i'm gonna close & open the document 10 times in a row i obviously don't want to write. i'm just searching for something fulfilling and clearly not finding it in the task at hand so i should do smth else.

THIS IS EXTREMELY LENGTHY AND I''M BEYOND SORRY, but i hope somewhere amongst this mumbo jumbo there was something that stood out & may give you a bit of closure!

[sophfandoms53]

Anon from before, I can’t keep talking because I don’t have anything else to add expect maybe Striker got other things he cared about besides his family taken away from that terrible day too. I don’t know I don’t have any else to add sorry. 😫 Although I will ask, what do you think of the song “In My Sights”?

NOOO YOU’RE FINEEEE

It gave me like a bunch of ideas to think about and I will never turn down any Striker thoughts so thank you for that🫶

There’s already been some theories about Striker losing what would’ve been his bar based on all the cluttered stuff he has around his lair, so that’s something to think about, and it connects back to his line to Blitz in HMF about how not many imps start businesses on their own yk.

Part of my backstory for Striker that I hope to share properly soon but my anxiety hates me LMAO has to do with him losing his wife and daughter (this man is so girl-dad shaped i promise) alongside his family that day and that little idea has become an entire google doc and timeline😭 I’ve had a lot fun with it and I wanna share ittttt, especially his wife I made bc I absolutely adore her sm she’s one of my favorite OC’s I’ve made bc I designed her to be this direct contrast to Striker in like every where, even down to her name, and i just ughhhh I love her and I love them. I even have an entire fic of them already done too.

AS FOR IN MY SIGHTS WELL UH….

Spotify wrapped aboutta have my neck this year LMAOO

rt i can write an essay about how fucking good I think In My Sights is and how it absolutely captures EVERYTHING about Striker’s character and story thus far. Every time I listen to it (which is often clearly) I ALWAYS find something new to appreciate.

And omgggg Ed’s vocals make me meltttttt.

I’ve never really talked about Striker’s voice change on here before but I truly don’t mind it and I actually adjusted to Ed’s performance rather quickly. As iconic as Norman’s was, I just feel Ed fits Striker’s character a lot better and we’ve been able to see more sides of him through Ed’s performance. Ed is such a wonderful voice talent and it saddens me people don’t appreciate his Striker enough because they’re still stuck on Norman. There’s so much range in Ed’s performance and I rlly enjoy him a lot.

I was always begging to hear how Ed would sing for Striker once he took over the character bc Sweet Victory was Norman’s little song (this song is so stupid i love it so) and he ate that up so ofc I was like Ed needs to sing too duh. I already knew he could sing bc I was a Hunicast viewer and heard that man sing as Alastor. So I wondered if he could do the same given Striker’s country accent and lower tone.

SO WHEN I TELL YOU MY JAW DROPPED WHEN HE HIT THOSE HIGH NOTES AT THE END OF THE SONG😭

Thoroughly impressed fr.

Just a fun little song that gives insight (lol) on our cowboy that I can dissect like every lyric of even if it’s not canon.

Although now that we got shorts coming out…. In My Sights AMV when???? Jk that probably won’t happen but i can be a little delusional during the drought okay LMAOO

[rahleeyah]

1.0 anon here. You encouraged me to keep checking in with my thoughts as I go.

Just started "Prodigy" (s3e13) and kinda swooned when Benson says "I speak a little Spanish and French. I can Mirandize in three others."

Love me a strong, brave, smart, skilled female lead character who's also got damage and baggage. YES. (Also love that they most likely gave Benson these language skills bc Mariska's got 'em. I hope we get to hear her use them eventually).

And unrelated, but in the previous episode (set in Dec 2001, aired Jan 2002) Cragen mentions "the attacks" in passing and it was kind of stunning that a show about NYPD cops let THAT be the so-far-only treatment of 9/11. I mean, The West Wing interrupted their whole episode flow to air a completely OOC script to allow their characters to process adjacent topics with a bunch of high school students, for a quasi public therapy process...

I know everyone had artistic decisions to make and it wouldn't have worked to make SVU swerve off track and become a terrorism show, but surely (1) SVU detectives would've at least known some of the cops who died in the towers, (2) even if they didn't they'd be traumatized and deeply saddened by all of it, (3) like just about everyone in NYC and the country at that point, they'd be talking and thinking about it??

Maybe this is just the difference between shooting and airing schedules and "the attacks" will have more visibility in coming episodes?

Oh I am very excited about this thank you lol

I find it interesting that while we do hear Liv speak a little Spanish in 1.0 we don't hear her speak Italian until 2.0, and Mariska was fluent in Italian the whole time, having spent time there growing up. But yes!!!! Love that they incorporated that into Olivia's character and I love too the insight it gives maybe not just into Olivia but into her mother; was Serena the one pushing Olivia to learn different languages? Did Serena want her to learn French and Italian, did Serena have books in those languages on the shelves at home, was it important to Serena that her dark haired little fae child be educated, be cultured, be sophisticated? Was Olivia ever enough of those things to make her mother happy?

Iirc the shows don't ever address a personal connection between our mains and 9/11 with the exception of the late reveal that Tucker worked the cleanup and got cancer from it. And personally, I'm kinda glad that they didn't, bc I don't think the show has the skill to handle that topic well. The national conversation about police, and religion, and war and the state, was so deeply, deeply toxic post 9/11 that I shudder to think what a police procedural might have done in that moment in time. Sorkin is a playwright and a man whose work has always had a sharply (white) liberal political bent, and he presented a one hour bottle episode homily that was moving, true, but also deeply informed by his personal beliefs. His audience wasn't lowest common denominator middle America; a lot of middle America hated tww. Some people resent the episode in question, think it's patronizing or over simplifying. L&O was supposed to be for Everyman. Gently teaching middle America about the concept of consent and shyly saying "maybe solitary confinement is bad actually", but even then doing it carefully. Presenting issues as conversations between characters who take up opposing sides, instead of preaching one view point (in 1.0; later when 💡 came on board the show became more preachy). At the time of the attacks SVU didn't have an especially political bent, and given how high tensions were, how emotionally raw the city of New York was, given that everyone involved in making the show lived in NYC (tww was filmed mostly in LA and DC) and how many layers there were to people's feelings.... that's a really delicate line to walk, and the ramifications of doing it badly would be a show killer. Sometimes no response is better than a bad response.

So while I'm interested in the idea of how Liv and Elliot felt as cops working in Manhattan during 9/11, I am glad we don't have Dick Wolf's personal take on it entered in the record, and can instead save this for personal musing, fic, meta and the like. There is a lot to unpack there.

[lunatic-fandom-space]

I just finished season 4 and unlike with the others I didnt have a whole lot to say as a was watching, mainly because I was actually enjoying myself and thought the season was mostly really good ? absolutely wild. Nevertheless I have some thoughts

I LOVE Alya and Marinette working together, its a delight. When I talk about "man can you imagine if MLB did like a magical girl show and focused on female friendships instead of catfighting" THIS is what Im talking about!! And Idgaf about how this affects the Love Square at this point, this is all Ive wanted! Also, I feel like Alya and Nino knowing each others identities cheapens the Love Square conflict more than anything but I cant fully articulate why so I'll just leave it at that

The Love Square is in a very strange place where, when the identity reveal finally does happen, its simultaneously going to feel like its too little too late (a la the destiel confession bc this fucking show is just straight queerbaiting) and rushed because like. what kind of development is there between these two. They barely focused on romance this season (which is definitely part of why I think its better lol) but I dont mean that in the sense that we had less catfights and Marinette making a fool of herself for no reason, I mean that in the sense that it barely felt like they interacted at all, atleast to me so thats kinda odd

In the past Ive complained about how the civillian plotline usually feels very disconnected from the superhero/akuma plotline and I think theyve done a much better job, my favorite episode of the season is probably Qilin both for tying the akuma into the civillian plot and for having a somewhat unique conflict resolution. In general, I liked that we had people rejecting akumas as well as preventative measures in form of the charms, although I do think it sucks that a few episodes afterwards Shadowmoth just figures out a way to circumvent them and then its back to business as usual. I feel like a better workaround would be that the charms can only protect you from one akumatization each, so like, the charm Ladybug gave her grandfather in Simpleman can only protect him from becoming Simpleman again, but if he turns into Bakerix, she needs to give him a different charm. But I do find the charms cute

The new heroes all suck tbh, the only design I liked was Purple Tigress and Pigella came close to looking kinda good but then they made it this intensely unflattering shade of pink, which I find impressive because Rose is already wearing an completely different intensely unflattering shade of pink in her civillian form. One thing that I appreciated about whatever Mylenes superhero form is called, Pigella and Purple Tigress is that they had more justifiable reasons for Ladybug to pick them than most of the heroes in the last season, who were mostly just picked because They Were There ig. And then Penealteam rolled around and we were back to doing exactls that kind of bullshit. great.

Also, Ive already talked about this in a seperate post, but if they absolutely insisted on looking for a replacement for the Bee, it shouldve been Sabrina and they shouldntve invented a whole new character for it

Adrien got a little more focus this season and we actually got some insight into his character when hes not either The Object Of Marinettes Idolization or Ladybugs Punny Sidekick Thats Slowly Becoming Obsolete which I enjoyed because he has a lot of potential from a dramatic standpoint what with being Hawkmoths son and all, but hes usually so bland that I dont really care too much so this was pretty nice. And it only took us 4 seasons for him to get some focus, yknow, the other superhero in the title? Well better late than never I guess

Speaking of Adrien, Ive made quite a few posts where I said that this season would be ruined for me the second the Sentiadrien reveal happens but it never did, we're getting that in season 5 and I am not looking forward it especially considering the small taste Ive already gotten of it with Adrien being very obviously controlled by that ring. Like, I'll probably talk about it in more detail when it gets fleshed out in the show but for now I'll just say it doesnt make the stakes higher like the writers seem to think, it make the story wayyyy less interesting and it feels like its supposed to be an explanation for Adriens behaviour towards his father when we absolutely do not need one beyond "hes being abused"

I know I said that I thought this season was really good and now Im just just complaining mostly like I always do but idk, Im not as good at formulating my positive thoughts as my negative ones. The last thing I'll say is that I loved Scarabella and I loved her design and I loved the whole episode she was in, as well as the entirety of Sentibubbler, Alya really served this season

Thats it, thanks for reading :D

[bronanlynch]

once again I've watched more anime than done anything else this week but I promise I also have other stuff to talk abt

listening (podcast):

Great Gundam Project: almost done with their 0079 episodes and it's so funny to hear how confused and surprised they are that Newtypes don't get mentioned until the last 10 episodes. also, once again, hearing them talk about Char reminds me that I miss seeing Char on my television screen :/

Palisade: once again it was crazy good this week. shout out to fucked up dream sequences/visions of alternate futures, gotta genuinely be one of my favorite storytelling devices

listening (music): MakeDamnSure by Taking Back Sunday, which is going on my Partizan/Palisade playlist for Balence reasons

reading:

Imperial Uncle: got to more fun reveals that make the main relationship a lot tastier and more fun. still having a good time with this one

The Death I Gave Him: part of the appeal of this book for me (other than that I love Hamlet & Hamlet retellings) is the romance with the sentient lab AI. this should shock absolutely no one (at least no one who knows me as the Sokrates/Integrity guy lol) but I'm real into stuff that explores like, how intimacy works when you don't each have your own separate bodies

A Power Unbound: also started & finished something I've been looking forward to, A Power Unbound by Freya Marske, the third book in a romance/historical fantasy trilogy (different main characters for each) set mostly in Edwardian England. I've enjoyed the other books in the series, and I enjoyed this one too (though I think I prefer the other two for reasons that probably don't have to do with the actual quality of this book and have more to do with what I like & don't like in a main relationship, and actually it's a testament to how strong the writing was that the relationship worked for me anyway, because it did feel earned in terms of both characterization & themes, even though it's the sort of relationship dynamic that I tend to be hesitant about because I often see it done very badly in fanfic in ways that do a disservice to the personalities of both characters involved). anyway. my actual review is that I love fucked up magic houses and there are several of those in this book so shout out to that, and one of the main characters is extremely my type (short, angry, hates the aristocracy, etc)

watching:

I'm in Love with the Villainess: we're caught up now, and I do love class conflict even if I'm sure it's going to be incredibly simplistic and silly because that's the show this is (which I am fine with, to be clear, this is a romance anime based on lovingly parodying otome games, I am treating it with the same kind of seriousness that I would treat something like Scum Villain)

Bakeoff: I'm glad that this year they seem to be better about not putting way too much weight on the showstopper and sometimes deciding star baker based on other challenges like. finally some respect for people who do really well in the signature!!

Legend of the Galactic Heroes: I mean. I've been posting through it about this one so I don't think I have any new insights here just. man. I love it when a major character death is done really well. what a show (positive)

Gundam Seed: you may, at this point, be asking why Seed is our next Gundam after finishing ZZ, especially when every week I talk about pining for Char. the answer is because my roommate watched some of it a while ago and wanted to revisit it, and also because we're saving Char's Counterattack for when we get really desperate for Gundam that isn't Seed. anyway. Seed is fun so far!

the above description of Gundam Seed was written a few days ago when we first started but before we got to the info dump about what's up with Coordinators & Naturals so I'm editing this to say: oof. it really is like what if someone took all of the parts of the original Newtype stuff that I was most skeptical about, took out all of the metaphorical stuff from Zeta that redeemed the concept for me, and then explicitly added literal eugenics. don't like that!

the other thing about Seed is the misogyny which like. god. at least the misogyny in Zeta felt more interesting to think about. at least it felt like Tomino was saying things about gender even if I didn't always like it. this is just peak early 2000s misogyny where everyone including the writers hates women so much that every man comes across as incredibly gay because their relationships with other men are treated so much more seriously

at this point you might be asking what I actually like about this show since I've been complaining for several paragraphs and the answer is I love it when childhood friends end up on the opposite sides of a war. also, a lot of Seed feels like it's trying very hard to Be A Gundam Show (for better or worse tbh, I can feel myself being marketed to, I can practically hear Bandai being like, hey remember how cool it is when a blue-and-white mobile suit fights a pinkish-red mobile suit, don't you want to buy some models), and I am not immune to classic Gundam shit like "oops these kids are involved in a war now because the military was developing a top-secret superweapon right next to where they live" and "your lives are at risk and/or you might get arrested for trying to protect your friends because the higher-ups are incompetent/selfish/do not care about you." I am also not immune to squads of edgy anime boys, or giant robots that each have their own special weapon/power, or whatever the fuck Le Creuset's got going on. I love him. I still miss Char and he's not quite filling that void but I do love him

playing:

another session of my Blades in the Dark campaign, based on the image below (from here). the crew was asked to get the sea serpent to go away and leave ships alone, and absolutely no one was surprised that the secret actual mission was to protect the sea serpent (a baby one) from the coast guard who were going to try to make it leave but more violently because we're playing Blades like it's a game about befriending creatures (see also: Missy is currently trying to resocialize a former fighting goat and Xiao Yun collects extremely fucked up birds)

Ace Attorney 5: not very far into the trial but man. sorry for falling for the trilogy nostalgia but I love to have Edgeworth as a prosecutor, I love the energy that he and Phoenix have, I'm such a sucker for defense attorney & prosecutor working together to find the truth and also they're in love

making: vaguely spanakopita-inspired stuffed pastry wreath. we made it once before and put too much extra vegetable in that released too much water while it was baking so the dough just straight up did not cook. we did it better this time! the dough is actually baked! (it's store-bought crescent rolls, we did not make the dough). anyway. there's spinach and mushroom and herbed goat cheese in there, and it's tasty

drinking: the grocery store had peppermint bark creme liqueur, and it's pretty good in hot chocolate

writing: continued to pick away at a zine fic, figured out what I want to write for my Nirvana in Fire exchange fic, and also did a little bit more on the Integrity fic that I've been working on. it has been a minute since I've written an action scene huh

The Principality knows how to contain divines, to leash them, to defang them and bend their powers to its will. And Integrity is an old divine, and never among the most awe-inspiring. Integrity is a small, quiet thing, precise and intimate and not suited for flashy displays of power like many of its fellows. But it is a divine nonetheless, and when it fights, it brings death. Orbit-and-Integrity steps into the corridor where the Princept fled. Orbit bares their remaining teeth, blood pooling in their mouth and seeping through the seams that begin to open in Integrity’s armor where it no longer has the focus to keep them closed.

[valeriianz]

About Me Books

Rules: 10 (non-ancient) books for people to get to know you better, or that you just really like. (what classifies as "non-ancient"? lol)

tagged by @mathomhouse-e @academicblorbo and @seiya-starsniper

ahhh i'm not as big into reading as i used to be :') not sure if i can find 10 books to define me... but i'll try my best. here's a list of books that made me sit down for a while and/or yell about online...

Kitchen Confidential by Anthony Bourdain. anyone looking to get a little insight to the restaurant industry from the POV of a chef, this is the book for you. it's gritty and real and all narrated by Bourdain's dry, dirty, and dark humor. it's an easy read and for someone like me (who can't really stand kitchen TV shows or movies because that's the life i live) it is actually palatable and i really liked it.

We Play Ourselves by Jen Silverman. i only recently read this book last year and it blew me away. it is everything i want in a character story. it follows a young, bi woman, who's an up and coming play writer in NYC. she had done something so terrible she ran away to California to squat on an old friend's couch. while she's there, she meets with a woman who's shooting a documentary and while the protag gets involved and helps out, she realizes that it's... not a good situation. all the while hints are dropped about what she did in New York and-- its very relatable to me personally: running away from your problems, thinking if you bury it and dont talk about it, it will go away. distracting yourself into something else but it digs up old ghosts and forces you to make an uncomfortable decision... but its ultimately good for your growth and maturity. it's a fantastic read if you like character stories.

The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. read this book February last year and once i was finished, immediately fell into the deep, dark hole that was Greek Mythology (i never was properly taught about the myths. i was assigned the Iliad to read for my English minor, but had just skimmed it like the lazy 20-year old college student i was). and throughout 2022 (up until October when i watched The Sandman) Greek Mythology was my entire personality. and while this book takes A LOT of creative liberties (esp with Patroclus, dear god) i still love it to death. it's gorgeous and so poetically written.

Unwind by Neal Shusterman. we've come into the first (and only) YA novel on the list lol. i haven't reread this in probably a decade, so i'm not sure if it still holds up. but if you like dystopian stories, boy howdy do i got a fucking unique one for you. i found a really good article about it that starts with a perfect summary: "...follows three teens on the run from a government that believes “unwinding,” or body harvesting, is an alternate solution to abortions and unwanted teens... Although controversial in topic, this disturbing novel inspires deep thought about organ donation, abortion, and one’s personal right to make decisions regarding his or her body." it's so captivating that i had started writing a short film screenplay for it in college (that of course i never finished). i read this when it first came out in 2007 and i still own my original copy.

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini. oof. so, this is one of those books that one read through was good enough for me, but it left me with such an emotional impact that i just had to own my own copy of it. if you dont know the book, it's a character story about guilt and redemption. it's set in 1970s Afghanistan and then again about 20 years later under Taliban rule. it's extremely hard to read (not just because of the subject matter, but it's also... incredibly dry). it starts off SO strong, falls in the middle (enough that i almost gave up) but then shoots off like a bullet during the last quarter of the novel. it's. phenomenal. heartbreaking and empowering and just such a good and believable story. (also the film adaption was done very well!)

From Here to Eternity by Caitlin Doughty. just gonna start this one off by recommending all of Caitlin's books. this is her second and it covers Caitlin's relentless pursuit of encouraging "death positivity" by traveling the world to discover how other cultures besides our own, care for their dead. Doughty is a mortician (she also has a fantastic Youtube channel where she does mini documentaries and video essays on death and the macabre) and her writing is filled to the brim with respect, tenderness, and endless curiosity. i love her and share her beliefs.

The Martian by Andy Weir. i'm not much into the adventure genre or sci-fi... but this one took me by genuine surprise. the narrator is so dry and funny, despite his horrifying situation of being stranded on Mars. we work through his attempts at staying alive together, painstaking as it is, while also catching glimpses of what NASA is doing back on earth about the situation. it's soooo cool and fun (and the climax is fucking amazing. i knew the film could never pull it off but boy was i still disappointed in how the film handled it lol).

Lord of the Flies by William Golding. read this guy in high school and it's just always stuck with me. something something man's inherent evil. how even the most sophisticated and promising of us can be reduced to our base instincts in dire situations. how it's not always an adventure, there are real stakes and consequences and... it's just so sad and terrible, almost comically so. as a teenage loner who was horrifically bullied all through middle and high school, this book was my fucking staple. i wore out that paperback.

Circe by Madeline Miller. oh it's another M.M. book lol. listen, Miller owns my entire ass at this point (im so excited for her Persephone book omg) i didn't get around to reading this until i'd finished a ton of Greek myths podcasts and reading The Odyssey so i felt a little more prepared going into it. i love Circe in this book, i love that she's not perfect and has literally hundreds and hundreds of years to fuck up and get better, grow into who she wants to be as a witch and as a woman. going through classic stories through her perspective is also a lot of fun, and my man Odysseus is there for a good chunk of it.

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. a book about adventure, self discovery, learning what it means to be free and to govern yourself. being unafraid to be rootless while in search of your Personal Legend. this book reached into my brain and massaged it. if you couldn't tell by now, i'm obsessed with character stories. i am a vagabond in my real life and i can not settle down. this book was written for me lol i enjoyed every word. (it has Islamic/Christian undertones but it's not in your face, which would have been a major turn off otherwise). i listened to the audiobook version of this narrated by one of my favorite actors, Jeremy Irons *chefs kiss*

this took an incredibly long time, but it was a good way to spend my morning, rifling through my bookshelf while sipping coffee haha. and oh god, here we go being unsure who to tag: @tj-dragonblade @scifrey @issylra @hardly-an-escape @teejaystumbles @virgo-dream @watercubebee

[earthtooz]

this was so funny when i read it would you possibly be willing to share your experience on vc with mitsies limitless six + any others (if it happened already)

omg yes i will provide u first hand insight into vc experiences with @mitsies, @limitlesshq, @sixosix, @kruinka, @windshieldwiper, and ME >:3

our server is pretty diverse so we all have different accents and varying timezones lol, we make fun of each other sometimes for it (only me, art, and mitzi partake in this accent mocking lMFAO we mock each others.)

A LOT OF BULLYING. A LOT. (all for good fun dw we don't mean it (yes we do))

art, mitzi, six and i have matching statuses and it's been this way for like EVER lol + i have matching profiles with another one of our friends who used to be active on tumblr (kruin + ash if you're reading this, join our club... smh...).

us shouting at ONE member for her very terrible sleep schedule.

on the other hand, mitzi HAS a bed time.

intermittent language swaps from EVERYONE in the server - we can all speak two or more languages.

art and i complaining about our homework and uni, the two of us are really trying to fight thru it. oh and mitzi complains abt chemistry here and there. relatable.

weekly blue lock viewings. mitzi, art and i (joined by ashley sometimes) plan to watch all the new eps together.

us making fun of six (and kruin) for playing genshin.

ashley explaining some latest gossip going on in her life.

ashley going 'YEAHHHHHH' in encouragement anytime any of us start a sentence with 'should i...', regardless of how terrible our statements will be. i could be like 'should i drop out of uni' and ashley would be like 'YEAHHHHHHHH'. art would also be like 'YEAHHHHHH' because art has said multiple times that they'd like to drop out.

family rp from six and i bc it's funny and ever since it started, we have not gone back. six if you're reading this... *pinch*

oh LOUD ASS TYPING from me. it's like gabbie hanna typing AND IT'S SO LOUD idk how the others are okay with it because i am a FURIOUS TYPER and FAST with it too. kruin said it's like asmr and art says they're okay with it but i don't really believe them.

genshin streams from six bc as much as we make fun of her for being a genshiner, we make fun of her even more whilst she's actually playing it.

SIX DOING A SCOTTISH ACCENT AND ART DOING A COUNTRY ACCENT. THIS WHOLE BIT WAS SO FUNNY FOR SO LONG AND IT STILL IS.

oh us going 'your little japanese sightseeing trip is going to turn traumAAAtic' bc rin speaking english is just too cute to not imitate from time to time (he instantly becomes less intimidating, i love it).

six is a master of accents.

again, us making fun of six for playing genshin. i've had kruin and six explain genshin lore to me multiple times- why is it not ending.

oh we give each other hauls whenever we buy things. i gave one today lol + i ask for opinions on instagram pictures and how i should order them lol.

a lot of groaning and screaming and crying from all of us over our fav characters. it's a hellhole in there.

thanks for asking, soup! it's so cute that u were curious :< i hope u enjoyed whatever ramble i just went on!

[venusiansims]

Hi Max! I admire your work and, if it's all right with you, I have a few questions about it. First, as Ink Stains is coming to an end, do you have plans for a second season or some form of continuation? Petra is an intriguing character who I would want to see more of. Second question: what inspired Petra? For some reason, she feels both familiar and distinct. And, my final question: while it may be a little early, do you have any other series planned outside Pale Angels? That's all! 💗

Oh hello! Thank you so much for showing interest in my content, that really warms my heart <3 I rarely get questions on here about my shows so this message really brought me some joy just now lol. Well, you've just unlocked a Pandora's box of boxes so be ready for a LOT of information,,,

- Ink Stains season 2?

Sadly, Ink Stains won't get a second season. It was always intended to be a four part miniseries, and it wouldn't make much sense to expand that already small plot in any way. Even with just four episodes there were moments where I found it difficult to fill the airtime. The majority of the characters (in my opinion) are written so that they are only interesting in limited doses. BUT, although there won't be a second season, that doesn't mean there won't be "some form of continuation"... more on that is answered in the last question. >:)

- What inspired Petra?

I started working the concept for Ink Stains in early 2021, and it underwent many changes before it reached its current form. At the same time that I was rewriting the story, I was reading Marlen Haushofer's Mansarda. The book has nothing to do with the series or Petra, but for some reason it gave me new insights on how to (somewhat) soften her character, as the original plot and Petra's character were both significantly edgier. From there, I'm not even sure what inspired her or guided me to where she is today as a character. And tbh, I feel like her design makes her appear more intriguing than she actually is lmao.

- Future projects?

Nothing is really set in stone, buttt.. Pale Angels will feature a large cast as well as a good amount of episodes. By using the Sims 2 as a tool to tell your story, which can already be a draining af, working with such a vast cast on top of that, can be incredibly exhausting. I’m not gonna go into detail about that much, but basically everything takes longer and requires more planning... which is not always enjoyable. 

Knowing myself, I will eventually start a different project alongside it to distract myself and prevent burnout. This is where Ink Stains comes into play.

With Ink Stains, the size of the cast has always been one of my biggest issues. I ended up including more characters than necessary to tell the story because of my writing skills—or, to put it more accurately, lack thereof. Victor, Petra, and Fren were always supposed to be the only three characters in the story, but other characters were ultimately needed to progress plotlines, offer the main protagonists difficulties to overcome, and generally give them more depth… And I hate that.

Don't get me wrong, I love all the supporting and minor characters in the show, but I do wish I were a better writer and didn't need such gimmicks to tell that particular story. Of course there will always be a need for background characters, but not to this extent. To get to the point already LMAO my next project will be similar to Ink Stains and will only have three characters as its main focus. Although it might not be a sequel, it will be a type of continuation with the same-ish coming of age/indie story and similar vibes.

Damnnnn this is long. I'm sorry if this was boring to read, but I do hope you found my rambling enjoyable, and that I answered you questions. <333

[lazymatsu]

hi! sorry if this is weird or anything but I’ve just read ur cheating Kuroo krkn fic you wrote back in 2017. I found it a while ago and it literally lives in my head so I was wondering if you ever thought of an ending for it? Like if Kenma forgives kuroo or if they stay together. I know open ended is obviously up for the reader’s interpretation but I just can’t see what would happen after. I don’t know if you’re still active but I’d love to hear back from u!

oh hello! yeah i'm still active, though i mainly lurk on this blog in particular. i hope this provides some insight for you and thanks for asking! if you have any more questions i'd be happy to answer to the best of my ability! this got fairly long so apologies, i put everything underneath a read more to help.

i'll be honest and say that it was hard for me to envision a true ending for the story in the sense of a continuation. and i did ponder the idea of writing a sequel and prequel to it (that still lingers from time to time and you can always ask about those too if you'd like). there were so many different avenues i could have taken that picking just one left me feeling like there was more it. you can ask about those too, there was a lot of ways this fic could've gone and i'll be sounding a bit vague since details come easier to me as i actually write the fic. but one ending that i often came back to was the idea of kenma trying to find meaning in his life again, while still staying with kuroo. kuroo having some sense of closure and understanding would still look out for kenma, but ultimately gave kenma room to grow to find new experiences to build new memories. kenma would've done... nothing essentially out of character, but may be a bit more adventurous in trying to figure himself out. maybe travel a bit farther and realizing wow he hates packing. or getting another job bc god knows he isn't sure what's rly going on with his current one. especially considering that i envisioned that Nekoma would've been a big hit and many people were asking for interviews that he rly could not participate in for good reason. oikawa might have had to step in and offer some statements of things he did have answers to, but ultimately there would've been a lot of balance regarding press and privacy that had to be handled delicately. i think kenma would've had to grapple with the ghost of who he was, who kuroo hurt, and who he is. and that's a lot of ppl to take into consideration. bc there is a lot of things left over by those people that he has to carry. there would've been a sense of dissociation from those other identities, while still maintaining that it all kinda leads to the current him which also isn't all that different from before.

there would've been a lot of interference from every single party i've mentioned. both in attempts to get the two to move on, but to also help kenma feel better about things. the topic of gaining memories back would've been tossed back and forth, but i never thought too hard on the specifics there. i think everyone would've stayed rooted in their respective sides lol, but there would be no real winner.

i think there's also kuroo learning who kenma actually was bc kuroo had a v specific image of kenma in his head in their time together. that obv changed once kenma learned what he was up to and how he had to cope and navigate that. kuroo would've learned a lot of the ways kenma had to force himself to stay strong and all the sacrifices he made. while learning of kenma's secret life, bc wow you kept this whole side of yourself a secret from me and look at all this ppl in your life now. there'd be a lot of moments of kuroo having to face who he pushed kenma to become, especially in ways he wanted to protect him. kuroo and kenma would build a new dynamic i imagined. something more cautious, but still rather intimate regarding eachother (not physically, but moreso emotionally and mentally). i maintain that it is hard to cut someone out who you've known your entire life, and i imagine that kuroo and kenma have that kind of bond/soul connection that will just always naturally happen. some people may not be happy with that, but i think there's a lot that has built up over time and a lot of time to find something new. i can't ever say if it ever went romantic, bc i never rly thought it'd be on either of their minds as they try and find a new normal for both themselves individually and eachother.

tldr ; kenma and kuroo try to find a new normal and try to figure themselves out in the process. what that means for them as individuals and as two people involved in eachother's lives. this was an ending that i felt could've been the most transitional feeling that i felt was necessary for take me home. the means to fill the gaps the original fic ended on, that eventually leads to whatever else i would choose to make of it.