#this was their realest death idk maybe it’s the samgirl in me

[brotherscain]

season 2 sam’s death will never not be a punch directly to the gut, but i genuinely think if i could mindwipe one thing in order to experience it for the first time again it would be that. because, fuck

neither of them have ever DIED. yeah, dean came close back in nebraska with that reaper but he pulled through. and that’s his little brother. that’s the kid dean raised and loved. even when he went off to stanford and it hurt like hell, sam wasn’t dead or anywhere close to it. dad told him he might have to kill sam but even that wasn’t enough to put this horrible image in his head. his brother’s still as warm as his spilling blood when he goes down and he can’t even keep his head up right to look at dean. there is absolutely fucking nothing he can do. dean carries sam heavy in his arms the whole way to the car, to the bed. his brother is dead out of nowhere. and dean’s entire world stops with him.