#this was also my entry into actually identifying as bi after identifying as a lesbian for 6.5 years

[gaybearwedding]

can i be so honest and vulnerable. mountport was my intro to zach and jess (and i adored it and still do) but it was not actually my entry into being mentally ill about them. that happened about 8 months later when i got high, watched humpty dumpty for the first time, and witnessed zach reino making a very stupid sex joke and getting slightly flustered bc it came out more explicit than he intended. from there it was all over for me

[alatismeni-theitsa]

Coming out story time, Γρεεκ edition. With a plot twist. Sorry for the long ass rant I just didn't know who else to tell my story who would get both the Greek Thinking TM and also be accepting of queer ppl.

Apologies for crude language (i think)?? I cannot describe it in a way that's as eloquent and beautiful as I want.

A. Μαμά.

I came out to my mother descriptively, because I knew if I said a Big Gay Word she'd instantly connect it to what she associates with Gay stuff, and I wanted to get her honest reaction, not what she thinks her reaction should be. And also because I Do Not Know what exactly I am (out of the whole LGBT alphabet, I could be Gay/Les, I could be Bi, I could maybe sort of kinda be trans but I do identify with womanhood in the Greek TM way so I don't think I can call myself NB? Anyway whatever, labels don't matter to me and only make me feel weird when applied to me), so there's that.

Specifically I said "Ma, I'm not only attracted to boys." Because that's the best I can describe my hauntingly persistent bisexuality as haha.

After the initial confusion, the first question she asked was "so you'd want to have sex with a woman?" A question I chose not to answer, one because Μαμά τι στο καλό θες να σου πω τώρα :/ and also because the answer is neither no or yes. It goes beyond just Mm Yes Pussy Nice for me. Reducing it to just that is making my skin crawl just as much as Mm Yes Dick Nice. That's dehumanising for me, I'm sorry. :/ My answer was literally "δεν ξέρω/δεν απαντώ" lmao.

And?? She may have accidentally come out to me too??? Without realising it?????

Because she said three things:

1. "Oh, when I was at your age I went through this phase as well." Which??????????? What does it mean if not the think I'm thinking of??? Ma have you really been in denial/the closet for 50 years?

2. "I was fiercely defensive of gay people when I was younger." Which, YES. As you should μαμά. Only it has created this haunting fear in me that in 30 years time, with "experience", I'll change too and I'll go against my gay brothers and sisters as Ορθοδοξία seems to want. Which I won't. I hope. I can only hope my heart won't change, even if I marry a guy and go ahead and have children of my own. Like... it doesn't make sense, HOW did she change her mind in the first place??? How does that happen to someone? Will it happen to me too?

3. "It's okay, I love you for who you are." In the end, all is good. Even if she thinks she's a phase that I'll grow out of, and probably would not allow me to think about dating/settling with another woman, she's not cutting me out of the will! She still loves me!! It's a win for me. :D

Also she approves of cute gender neutral nicknames because she's always called me that. Like: το ζουζουνάκι, το μαρουδάκι (εννοώντας πασχαλίτσα🐞), το κουφετάκι, κτλ.

I really love her little habits I'm sorry. :')

B. Αδερφούλα

I'll keep it brief because there's not as much to say. She's younger than me so she used to have a very much "oh ew wtf" reaction.

But recently?? She's been treating it like an inside joke??? Like, refering to me as "το τέρας" ή "το αρνί" because she knows I love being affectionately/jokingly called an "it". Also making gay jokes in rare occasions, which I love.

She's a little insecure about being perceived as Λεσβία for her fashion sense, and I regularly assure her that she can wear whatever makes her feel good and not worry about how others see her. Can she rock a γυναικείο κουστούμι like a boss? Fuck yea. Does that mean she's a lesbian just because she looks masculine and pretty at the same time? Fuck no, you do you boo. I know how much you like dressing like this. Nobody's opinion can take it away. And lesbians are not Bad either, so she has a lot to unpack in the future. But I'm still very proud of her and how far she's come since I first told her (long before mom actually) and I absolutely love her to death.

Also she called me a bottom. Shame on her. Gah, siblings.

Honorary entries:

C. Dad

I have yet to come out to him because he often ridicules openly queer people on TV. Like, οικογενειακά watching Eurovision the Maneskin year (every year really) was both hilarious and terrifying.

But, like?? He's also lowkey kinda Bi too in a repressed way? In the way that he's loyal to the woman he married but also making strong bromances when given the chance? It's so funny to me, because he has such a soft and fond expression when talking about friends he has sort of trauma-bonded with (term used loosely, but you know how Dads are).

I could also be just tripping and trying to seek comradeship where there's none because Parents are the ones a child seeks to relate to, but I'd rather not psychoanalyse me rn.

D. Granny

Also can I just talk about Passive Acceptance. Because granny (without knowing about my identity) sometimes refers to me and my sister as παλικάρι in a Gender Neutral sense ("δεν είναι μόνο τα αγόρια παλικάρια" she says. granny is a feminist icon without even trying to be. slay.) and it makes my woman-in-a-vague-sense-i-guess(?) heart do the little proud flutter thing.

Also does it make sense to be a non-binary when it comes to speaking English but sort of a woman (actually yes a woman but also yes and no at the same time because I look and act really soft cheery and feminine but I'm mentally also a τέρας από την άβυσσο και τα τάρταρα :D) when speaking Greek??? It's so confusing, how can I perceive gender in two entirely different ways at the same time what the everloving fuck. What AM I...??

Again, sorry for the jumbled thoughts, my last three braincells are busy rn χορεύing Καλαματιανό.

Γειαα! Παιδια με σκλαβωνετε με τα μηνυματα σας τελευταια 💗 Ειλικρινα χαιρομαι παρα πολυ που εχω εστω και λιγο την εμπιστοσυνη σας - εγω μια ξενη στο ιντερνετ - και μου λετε τις σκεψεις και τις ιστοριες σας! Το εκτιμω παρα πολυ!

Να ξερετε οτι ακομα και αν τυχον διαφωνουμε σε καποια πραγματα, μπορειτε να μου στελνετε μηνυματα. Γιατι ποτε δε θα διαφωνησω με το δικαιωμα καποιου να ζει με ασφαλεια και να ειναι ο εαυτος του (το οποιο ειναι ανθρωπινο δικαιωμα ουτως ή αλλως)

Επισης: Δημοσιευω το μηνυμα επειδη δεν υπηρχε καποια δηλωση που ελεγε να μην το κανω. Αν καποιος ομως θελει να μη δημοσιευσω καποιο μηνυμα ή να διαγραψω καποιο μηνυμα, ας μου το πει, δεν υπαρχει θεμα!

Οκ switching off to English!

The whole experience is So Greek, damn! Starting with Mother, telling her Descriptively, her saying that she also liked women "one time", then considering that something is off with Dad as well, then mentioning the accidentally supportive Grandma who gives no shits... Πρεπει να εχουμε ενα σχετικο επεισοδιο στις Οικογενειακές Ιστορίες ετσι για την ταυτιση των τηλεθεατων.

Also, just because I am a nosy dramatic bitch, I would DEFINITELY bring back this conversation if this was my mum, and I would tell her "You know that you like women too, right? You can't just... lose attraction for a whole gender overnight. And they also say that sexual orientation is genetic......" Just to see her reaction and try to convince her 😂 (Don't attempt if you think it won't go well for you! 😅)

I'm really happy about how you handled things with your sis! Being perceived as a lesbian is nothing bad because lesbians are nothing bad! She can rock whatever she wants, like you said! There are lesbians out there who dress like "everyone else", meaning that clothes can potentially be a hint but you can never tell just by the clothes. She has a lot to unpack indeed but with more teaching moments by you, I'm sure she's in good hands.

Oooooh that Dad case! I have a theory here, knowing Greek dads. Perhaps he will be more supportive than you think. Not just because of the things you mentioned, but because he loves you and supports you as his child (from what I read). Greek dads can be ride or die, especially with their daughters. So, if you are confident enough when you tell him, if you look logical and self-aware, he actually might back you up and he might be the most supportive! Parents often dismiss their children because they believe that children are doing it for attention, or because of a whim. Greek dads, I've noticed, want things to be told to them with huuuge neon letters, otherwise they don't act on the situation.

For example, you can be like "Dad, I want to tell you something. (diretor hint: play it sad and worried here, he might feel the need to be protective instead of defensive) I like women too, and I have been feeling it for a long time. I didn't feel it because someone else "indoctrinated" me to it. It's a natural feeling to me. It is not a phase. I cannot switch it on and off like it's a hall light. Most importantly, this is not dangerous for me. I know that you might be concerned and we can talk about it. I just want you to know because this is an important part of who I am."

-- Again, assess the situation accordingly. You definitely don't have to do anything I suggest. And you can make the dialogue more or less cheesy :P In any case, when you talk to him keep in mind that he's an older man who grew up in specific decades and you have to make an effort to set things his way otherwise things will be lost in translation and neither of you will notice.

That's how I got an old aunt to support me. 😂This aunt was the type that says "A woman liking another woman?? Ιησούς Χριστός!!" I noticed what things she valued most (being your own person, having fun in life, not allowing anyone to step on you) and I built my case by telling her that the way I live at the moment gives me all these advantages. I also matched her tone, and I tried to see things from her side, which eventually helped guide her to the mindset I wanted to introduce her to. Sometimes many conversations and subtle hints are needed for this guidance. And they also need to like you because the Greek statement "το δικο μας το παιδι ποτε δεν κανει κατι κακο! το δικο μας το παιδι ειναι χρυσο!" will usually prevail over "A woman liking another woman?? Ιησούς Χριστός!!" 😂

What's more, some parents of queer kids already know what their kids are. They just don't say anything out of fear they will encourage this behaviour. Meanwhile the kids get stressed for decades about how the parents will react, and when they finally come out the parents, the parents are like "eh... we already knew, to be honest. We've been watching you hug and kiss girls since you were like... six. We just hoped that you'd grow out of it, that's why we didn't bring it up. We didn't want you to grow up into a behaviour that would separate you from other kids cause they would bully you and harm you."

The grandma is TOP, by the way! I feel like many older people really know what's important in life. The thought of two women getting married might never be palatable to her but she knows that alienating family members for harmless shit is not where it's at. I love her already!

On the "It's so confusing, how can I perceive gender in two entirely different ways at the same time what the everloving fuck. What AM I…??"

It is a fact that people slightly switch personalities when switching languages. English is a more polite, careful, and tip-toeing language, while in Greece malakas is a word of love if said to your friend 😂 And it's true that cultures perceive gender in different ways. So if you switch to US English and get into their mindset, they have another version of femininity. (Well, the whole country is diverse but I'm talking about the generic, permeating WASP stereotype of the preferred femininity in the US media)

I switch behavior in English too and sometimes I find that I'm more polite and "more feminine" there, which for me... eeeh not my style so much. (English makes us dysphoric, pass it down 😂😂😂😂)

Which brings me to another discussion. I am not nonbinary so I won't want to speculate on what nonbinary is and how it feels. Instead I will speak about a phenomenon sometimes seen in women, who, (sometimes!) need to be seen as a person (who deserves full respect) and not "just a woman" they take up the nonbinary label. Being a woman (or a man) comes with certain expectations and baggage and sometimes as a woman (or as a man) you can totally feel like "fuck it, I want to opt out" or "I already don't do these things and I don't want to ever do them or feel them, so I guess am actually not a woman/man".

I want to stress again that I don't imply non-binary people are this. And I'm not saying that's you. I'm just leaving this out there because it's very harmful when society makes you feel like "failing" at your gender and telling you "you are not a real man/woman because you don't do the X stereotypes", and some people fall for it want to "opt out" of their gender without realizing that in the process they're following the logic of... binaries.

Whatever you identify as should come from the inside, not from what society tells you a woman should be. Because, as you noticed, the Greek and the US society have different notions of what a woman "should be". Heck, you might move to Sweden and find out that out there you feel like Barbie while in Greece you may feel like Babis doing the exact same things😂 Don't rely on society and stereotypes, my humble opinion is. Rely on yourself. And it's okay if you don't have a definitive answer to "what you are". Just live and present as you are most comfortable.

One more thought that I have, which you can also take or leave, is about the sexuality part. I'm not family or a friend, and I don't know you well. I'm not an authority and I don't think my words are scripture. My speculation could perhaps help your brain cells stop χορεύειν τσάμικον γύρω απ τη φωτιά στο δάσος 😂

Sooo... have you considered asexuality?

Heeeaaar me out. Your confusion seems a bit similar to that of people who are asexual but don't know it yet. First of all, there's a difference between aesthetic attraction and sexual attraction. Asexuals usually start thinking they are gay or bi because their sexual attraction to men and women is the same. Zero. 0 = 0 after all 😂

At the same time, asexuals can often feel "off" in their gender and gender expression because automatically they don't subscribe to amatonormative rules and hence, they don't subscribe to gender rules.

An asexual can still have aesthetic attraction to people (just not sexual) and want a romantic relationship. An asexual can have aesthetic attraction to only one gender or many. There's a whole spectrum in asexuality, and there are ace identities like the aegosexuals who are actually not sex repulsed. They are interested in sex as an idea, but they just don't experience sexual attraction for people in real life. (Imagine it like, you like watching football for the rush and the technique, but there's nooo way you want to go down on the field and start kicking a ball.)

Their relationships with their significant others are often "queerplatonic" because the way they perceive gender and companionship (that is not friendship) is queer compared to the rest of society.

I thought about this cause you mentioned the "hauntingly persistent bisexuality", and also because usually the answer to "so you wanna fuck women?" is "eh…yes??" if you are attracted to women in the usual way xD But of course, it might be just your character, that you don't want to focus on sex despite having sexual attraction, and, as you said avoid "dehumanizing" the other. So again, my speculation might be wrong. If you know you are sexually attracted to people, and if you don't have to ask "what is sexual attraction tho?" then that's probably not it😄

Okay, I rambled for too long again but I hope this message has helped you at least in one way. Know that you are already slaying out there and you WILL CONTINUE to slay because you're a cool and kind person with great self-reflection skills.

=================================

Generic message: If my posts have helped you in any way consider buying me a ko-fi 💖

[pulverulents]

#34: thoughts from the closet (alternative title: keeping quiet feels like shame)

I realised the last journal entry was formal as heck because I was so scared while writing it lol but I guess given the subject matter it makes sense. But hopefully now that I feel comfortable enough to be candid this will be more fun.

I made the mistake of opening twitter in the middle of the work day, and my brain fully short circuited because of Julien Baker at the boygenius Pittsburgh show, on stage with an open vest, no shirt, and rainbow boob tape. 

I’m still at work now, and I’m only writing this because my brain literally cannot function to do anything else. Literally no thoughts head empty, only “oh my god I’m so gay”. (That is, using ‘gay’ as an umbrella term to describe my attraction to women. Mostly because saying “I’m so gay” just feels a lot more fun and candid than saying “I’m so queer” or “I’m so bi”. But I’m bi, and I will not stand for bi erasure!!)

It’s been just over half a month after coming out to myself, and the past few weeks of feeling through it and practising saying it to myself have been... pretty crazy, to say the least. I’m getting better at not giving myself crazy anxiety every time I see a video on twitter or tiktok of MUNA and boygenius and especially Julien Baker, but they’ve been getting crazier and crazier on stage that it’s really not making things any easier for me. It also doesn’t help that every time Josette Maskin does that hip thing with her guitar, or every time Julien Baker does something particularly cute or hot or both, every lesbian and bisexual girlie online and in real life goes feral (you can tell from the screaming and shaking in the videos). I mean, I do too. I couldn’t tell you how flustered I was when I first saw the boygenius cowboy shoot, or a fan edit of Josette Maskin in the One That Got Away music video, or that tiktok of Julien Baker winking, I think I truly lost my mind. I’m pretty sure I’m bi and not a lesbian, but maybe I have a preference for women (which is WILD considering that I was obsessed with a boy for 7-8 ish years).

It feels weird not being able to scream about Julien Baker and boygenius and MUNA on my spam or on my twitter because I’m basically still closeted (ok but seriously though, how are all of them so damn attractive??? Literally all 6 of them!!!!). And holding myself back from fangirling to my close friends over queer artists feels weird because I’ve never held myself back from fangirling over Taylor Swift. I’m sure some of them would have the opinion that I’m probably not straight because I’ve told them before that I didn’t think I was 100% straight (which, in hindsight, I can’t believe I actually said that and still refused to identify as queer because it’s total bullshit like it’s fully not possible by definition to be not 100% straight and still not be queer lmao @ old me hun denial is a river in egypt), but I’ve never put a proper label on myself until now so I feel like they still assume that I’m basically straight. 

Over the past few weeks, I’ve been vacillating violently between “you’re not dating anyone right now, you haven’t dated anyone ever, this isn’t anything significant, nobody cares, nobody needs to know” and “no you gotta do this because if you don’t then you’re just feeding into the shame and the comphet”. Like, intrinsically I know that deciding to stay closeted doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s because I’m ashamed of my queerness; there are several members of the LGBTQIA+ community who never feel the need to officially come out or feel like it isn’t a big deal whether or not they come out and there’s nothing wrong with that, but for me personally? Maybe all the past years of internalised homophobia and comphet have made it so that keeping quiet feels like shame, even if it’s not. 

It’s still scary to think about coming out to them, though. The comphet has been giving me major imposter syndrome about being bi, and I’m scared that they’ll feed into it. I don’t want to be accused of calling myself queer just to fit in with the fan community of all the queer artists I listen to. Because that’s pretty fucked up, and it’s already taking so much of my effort to fight that voice that’s been lurking in my head because I know that it’s not real and it’s just a demon spawn of my own self-loathing and imposter syndrome. I know that I’m not in any real danger of my close friends reacting badly or outing me to people who I don’t want to be out to, but deep down the fear is still there. I know it’s irrational, but I can’t seem to get rid of it. But at the same time, these are the people to whom I have shown the most of myself, they are the only ones who really know about my history, and have journeyed with me through my struggles and my joys. It doesn’t feel right to hide such an integral part of myself from them, when they have already seen some of the worst parts of me and have stuck around in spite of it.

Or I could be completely wrong and they already know that I’m bi. I mean, despite the fact that I’d been obsessed with a boy for the past 7-8 ish years, I’ve realised that I’m literally a walking bisexual stereotype. The cuffed jeans, tucked shirt, rolled sleeves, awkward peace signs and thumbs-ups, flannels, inability to sit in a chair properly. I kind of dress like a butch lesbian, and I kind of have been doing that since my teenage years.

I was never very feminine as a child. I don’t remember much from my early childhood, but I do remember hating the colour pink, and hating wearing dresses. Heck, there are photos of me at age 8 being allowed to choose my CNY outfit for the first time and choosing to wear a dress shirt and pants, with my hair in a french braid. I used to think that I just have a complicated relationship with my femininity because of internalised misogyny and the patriarchy, but maybe it’s also because I’m gay. I used to justify the way I dress with “oh I don’t really care about fashion, I just throw on the first shirt and pants I see as long as it’s comfortable and it doesn’t clash”, but that’s a lie. I do care about fashion and the way I dress, deeply so, and I’ve just been saying that to hide the fact that most straight girls typically don’t quite dress as butchy as I do. And putting more effort into the way I dress in a way that feels comfortable would entail looking undeniably butchy, which was terrifying to consider when I was closeted to myself. I thought about considering gender, but gender is really fucky and even though I do occasionally feel some dysphoria, I don’t really feel any need to identify as anything other than a woman.

I’m not really very butch either, though, nor do I feel much of a desire to go full butch. As much as I dress like a butch lesbian in my day-to-day life, I do still enjoy feeling pretty, and sometimes I’m really feeling myself and my femininity if I’m in the right dress and the right headspace. I like eye makeup and will more than willingly wear it for performances, but lipstick makes me too uncomfortable. Even the fits that I wore for this year’s and last year’s reso concert were pretty feminine because they were dresses / skirts, but the shoes and top that I put together to complete the fit made it a little bit more butchy. And this was before I really started learning all these terms; I was just trying to style myself in a way that I thought looked and felt good and right. If I had to place myself along the spectrum of high femme to stone butch, I’d probably place myself somewhere within the ballpark of butchy femme to futch to soft masc, depending on how I feel that day. I don’t know, that just feels right for now, as I continue to explore how I want to be perceived.

Anyway, back to Julien Baker. I won’t lie, it feels good to say I’m gay or I’m bi without giving myself a panic attack. It’s.... liberating. I can feel myself slowly inching towards being able to truly feel queer joy. It’s slow, but it’s progress. 

-jo

[mossjunkyard]

LGBT PEOPLE'S SUPER SPACE POWERS

A thread made by my friend

@/draw_your_perfect_world on instagram.

Is... Is the post before the last one suggesting that if you are gay you can breathe in space?

Have they only send straight astronauts into space because they want to conceal this secret? Like do you have to put 'straight' on your resume to get into spaceschool????

Homophobia in the spaceforce isn't cause of assholes, its to protect a secret.

They are very strict. All people have a test where they are shown pictures of people of the same sex with a pulse meter attached to them. Liam hemsworth is in there for the dudes just so you know. Everyone who's heart rate get higher is kicked out. Therefor, no enimies of hemsworth or fans of his rolls or his brothers are in the spaceforce aswell.

In the contrary, the lesbian forces are slain by a newly added picture of brie Larson. Which also means there are no sexist men in the crowd as those shall be enraged at the showing of a picture of the female superhero that could beat them up.

For that reason alone, Carol is one of the only woman pictures shown to men.

Bi and pan people are very common in the airforce, as their heart rate is higher for both sides. This part of the lgbtq community can not breathe in space though, their ability is the strange gift of communicating with outwordly spicies. At least that is what people speculate about as we are yet to discover another spicies.

So, while the people who have a diffrent sexuality have an advantage in space (the other sexualities have yet to be discovered powers, except for ace and aro people who have the ability to walk on planets with lower or higher gravity rates as if it were earth) the people who identify as a gender other then the one they were assigned at birth, have an advantage on other instances.

Transmasculine/ ftm people have the rare and strange gift of being able to point out the planets where plant life exists or that could be suitable for human inhabitants. After discovering this fact nearly a year ago , a full team of only transmen was hired and are currently looking for planets that earth's inhabitants could make their new home.

Transfemine/mtf people have the ability to eat and drink any form of undiscovered plant or liquid which others are not capable of eating as it is poisonous. This makes for a big part of the people actually going to other planets in the near future to be transwomen, an elite force of only mtf astronauts is currently being trained to be at the top of their game, would we discover a new planet.

Then there's the whole spectrum of none binary/gender neutral people. Though they do go by a lot of pronoun, they all share the same trait of being immune to the extreme weather's that some planets have. The spacesuits of every astronaut are being made to withstand immense heat, but few can actually survive the boiling heat or freezing cold that makes it so hard for us to learn more about other planets around us. This is where these people jump into action.

Though I am sad to say that there isn't a lot of gender neutral people in the spaceforce, as most are afraid they will fail the entry test.

The gender fluid and bigender people have an advantage that is yet to be discovered as they are with few. Though a recent study shows signs of being able to both breathe in space and underwater when the water has a lower oxogen level then is usually holds in the areas where we normally go for a swim. While this seems similar to the gift that gay and lesbian people have received, the gender fluids don't have to breathe at all to survive in these situations while the gays have what appears

To be a small bubble like force around their mouths which recicles the air they are using. Which would explain why it has always been described as warmer then the usual cold wif of oxigen.

[webcomixtape-blog]

DISCUSSION: Discount Lesbians

DISCUSSION/TROPE

How’s THAT for a title, huh? Yikes. Well, buckle up kids, this could be a fun one. Or a train wreck. Either way, I feel like I need to get it out of the way early, given some of the comics I have coming up in future weeks of reviews. A quick warning: I’m just some shitty white dude on the internet, I may get some terms wrong in the following paragraphs. I’ve done my best, but I could fuck up. So. Be gentle.

The Discount Lesbians trope is about the presence of non-human queer characters being used in a story as a way to avoid controversy, or dealing with queer issues. In the classic example, what appears to be a queer relationship (guy on guy, girl on girl, polyamory, whatever, it all counts, despite the name) or of a ‘non-standard’ gender identity, be it agendered, trangendered or other, is made acceptable to either the audience or characters because one member of the relationship ‘doesn’t count’. Maybe they’re an AI, or a shapeshifter, something that can be claimed to be genderless, or only LOOKING a certain way, rather than being it. Maybe they’re an alien, or something that uses some bizarre form of reproduction not related to sex? The point is, their inhuman or not wholly human nature is presented as making the relationship ‘more acceptable.’

I’m going to be using a lot of quotation marks today.

Have you played Mass Effect? Mass Effect 1 in particular? OK, well, the Asari are a pretty straight (hah!) example. A race of blue skinned space babes, the Asari are ‘female’ and dress, act, and present themselves as such. In the first game, the player can have a relationship with the human crew members Ashley and Kaiden if they’re of the right gender, as both characters are straight, but weather you choose Fem!Shep or Vander!Shep, the Asari Liara is always an option.

Because she’s an alien, right? It’s cool. What did Tycho say in Penny Arcade? ‘It’s not gay if it’s an elf?’ Pretty much. Later games in the series deal with this, presenting plenty of characters of differing sexuality and species, humans included, but there’s a reason the page image for the trope is still an Asari. It’s kind of their hat that they’re the species everyone wants to fuck, and it’s fine, because, well, they’re Asari, right? Liara herself talks about it, how they’re not REALLY women, because they’re a single sex species that doesn’t do sexual reproduction like most other Council Races (Side note: Not races, species. Though I guess if Asari CAN breed with other species, they… Look, nevermind.)  they only use feminine pronouns for the sake of simplicity. And… Because they look just like attractive human women with head ridges.

I love you Mass Effect, but c’mon now. This isn’t Star Trek. Try harder.

What? What do you mean this is a webcomic blog? Right, shit, OK.

Let’s talk comics. The trope tends to come up more in the early days of a comic. Take Questionable Content, which featured an early subplot about the Anthro-PC comic relief having a bout of gender confusion after finding out it had ‘cybersex’ with another PC set to male. It’s not a bad little subplot, but doesn’t really add a lot beyond a few jokes about gender identity in AI who have it as a setting. Later on, the comic added a bunch of queer characters. Gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered, all of them human and treated with respect.

I’ll note that you don’t actually have to be human to avoid this trope, but I’m focusing on that later.

QC made the transition (hah again) well enough, and serves as a decent example of this trope being used to ease both the creator and audience into possibly difficult subjects and themes. If someone needs to mess around with robots before going with human characters, fine by me. It’s a complex, and sometimes prickly field to be writing about, more so if you’re doing it with humour.

Tropes aren’t actually a bad thing. OK, some of them are. Some are utter trash to be avoided, but most are just… Trends. Things you can identify in fiction. Is it a little ‘easy’ to avoid talking about homosexual or transgendered characters by making them inhuman? Sure. But sometimes that’s OK? Conservation of detail and all. Not every story has the time to focus on it. Others do, and with gusto. Some even use the trappings of the trope to great effect.

I’m planning to fully review Kill Six Billion Demons this Monday, but I’ll give you a quick rundown now: Alison has been pulled into a fucked up, demon and angel filled heaven of violence and decay, and it’s dope as fuck. Her two main companions are 82 White Chain Born in Emptiness Returns to Subdue Evil, who is an angel with the best name, and Ciocie Cioelle, a demon with a name based on Coca Cola. Cio is closer to a straight example, as demons can shift shape, to an extent, and she does appear to be bisexual, if her claims of having a boyfriend in the past AND her ‘historical fanfic’ including a relationship between her and Alison are anything to go on. I tend to prefer more blatant statements of sexuality from a character before putting a label on them, but that’s a different discussion.

And then you have 82 White Chain. The ‘point’ of this trope is to avoid talking about the issue, more or less. It’s about making the sexuality of a character unimportant, sidestepping it with a species-wide handwave. Yeah, 82 White Chain ain’t that. See, angels in K6BD are… Well, among other things, they’re atomic furnaces wrapped in stone armour that live to enforce the law of a dead god. They’re also sexless, and ‘genderless’, defaulting to male or neutral pronouns and appearance when not being huge, faceless winged beasties from the fun parts near the end of the bible. 82 White Chain appears to be a little more feminine than most, even sporting a VERY female-shaped form when free of that stone shell. It’s pretty clear that White Chain feels, or secretly wants to feel female.

Unfortunately, this isn’t really something her superiors are up for. And that’s where we leave the Discount Lesbians trope behind. Because 82 White Chain’s issues of gender identity are NOT handwaved or ignored, they’re a core part of the plot. Her society, such as it is, has a set stance on identity and expression, and she has suffered no end of stress and difficulty with it. This is what we in the business of over-analysing fiction call a ‘metaphor’. By abstracting things a little, dealing with sexless angels in a supernatural city of violence and badarsery, the writer and artist of K6BD, Abaddon, is commenting on the difficulties faced by transgendered people in the real world. Probably. I’ve not asked, but it seem likely.

That’s really the core of it. Just having an inhuman character be gay, or bi, or transgendered isn’t enough to earn you a Discount Lesbian trope entry. A lack of drama does. If your non-human character has to deal with difficulties, or hell, if your story also includes human queer characters, you’re probably in the clear. Hell, if it includes NO human characters, you’re pretty safe as well.

This has been a long one. I’m not sure I even have a point beyond ‘Asari are kind of dull and K6BD is great’ but hopefully this has prompted a few little thoughts. See you all next week for more of that second thing.

-James

[thoughtsfromabrokengirl]

02/28/2018

God in my last entry, I sounded lovesick. Not anymore bitches. Okay so today in my English class we had to give out Greek Mythology monolouges. And a lot of people were gods. Of course the costume of choice woud be a bed-sheet made toga. And so we enter in with me, a closeted lesbian (yes I probably said that I was bi earlier in this but I do not feel atracted to the male species anymore...more on that later) anyways, so this girl, lets call her H. H is cute and kind and sweet and in the past I have wanted to be her friend. Mind you that it was only this year that I met H. H was the goddess Hera for her monolouge and she wore a bed-sheet toga. She also had this belt that needed tying. Naturally seeing as I was the closet inidividual that she was okay with, she asked me to tie it. I am probably making a huge deal out of this and she is probably not even into girls but a girl’s got to dream. Back to what had happpened. So I tied it but inside I was fangirling because H looked super cute in it and as I was behind her, tying the belt, she looked even cuter. I mean her waist and yeah. Oh and the best part. She THEN asked me to clip in a leaf with a barette to her hair. I said sure why not. I had nothing better to do. And I did clip it in and her hair was soft and I think that I fucking SWOONED. My ass who has never really had a solid curhs since like 6th grade swonned. Yeah and later after we had done our monolouges, she asked me to untie it. God why did I like this? I could have been fine and chill but NO. Yeah, I am making a big deal about this.

As previously satated, I identify as lesbian currently. I now that it is not sometning to be taken lightly and trust me I am not. I have actually been debating this for a long while naow. I have come to the conclusion that I am 100% into girls. I already knew that I liked girls way more than boys but I do not see the appeal in them. They all have a dick. Nothing major. Oh and wait, here is the fucking tea. I was on instagram scrolling through my feed. I saw a caption that was like “so and so’s nudes make me hot” or somehting. I went to their profilce and clicked the link. It took me to twitter and there it was. A fucking nude of thi guy. And his dick and everything was out. I did not enjoy it one bit. Why the fuck would anyone be turned on mby a fucking loose hotdog that looked mostly similar to everyother one.  I just do not see the appeal.