#this turned out longer than i thought it would

[beloveds-embrace]

Sooo much angstttttttttttt 😭

I need the boys to wake up and do whatever it takes to fix it, please, I can't take the angst 😭😭😭

Does this count as fix-it? 🤔 hope you enjoy, anon! Also this turned out far longer than i thought it would lol

First Part

Another shift slowly happens within the duchy, palpable. The whispers of servants echo louder than ever, growing sharp and cutting in the empty halls you once used to frequent. They still avoid you, but now they wonder and whisper of your health. It’s not just them; the men you’d once hoped you’d at least be on an amicable basis with slowly change as well, the longer your absence haunts the halls and galas.

John is the first to act. It’s hesitant at first, awkward even, as though he can’t figure out how to approach the shattered remains of what he’s ignored for so long. He stands outside your door one evening, his shadow stretching under the flickering candlelight, fist raised to knock. But he doesn’t. Not at first. He falters, as if the weight of his guilt roots him to the spot.

When he finally does knock, it’s tentative, barely audible.

“…Are you awake?” His voice carries a softness you’ve never heard before, but it grates against your numbness.

You don’t answer. Your eyes barely flick towards the door, not moving from where you are curled on your side.

He lingers, sighs, and leaves.

You had intended to let yourself waste away, in all honesty. Only your mother doesn’t let you; she bursts into your room one day, sneers at the miserable sight you make, and insults you to the high heavens. Nothing new, even if her digs hurt, even if she says she isn’t surprised by no one loving you when you are like this, but she forces you to eat some nibbles and then into a shower; she doesn’t care. She is simply tired of having you be an embarrassment and hiding away from the public eye.

Thus, you no longer stay in your room. You don’t bother with jewelry, with heavy gowns or complicated hair styles or even clearing the layer of dust off your furniture, you just leave your room. Thankfully,

Unfortunately, that means passing by the maids and servants. It means passing by them. It means interacting with them again, though no longer initiated by you.

Simon is the second, and less direct. He lingers in places you begin to re-frequent; the library, the gardens, the corridors near your room. He doesn’t speak, just watches from the periphery, eyes heavy and intense. Once, when you brush past him without acknowledging his presence, he mutters something under his breath, his fists clenching at his sides. But he doesn’t try to stop you and you don ask what he said.

He probably didn’t mean you, anyways. You doubt he wants to speak to you, the obstacle.

Johnny falters the most. Though your interactions with him were few, you’d occasionally hear from the servants about how fun he is in general. His smiles, though they’ve never been aimed at you, look quite fake to you, jokes half-hearted and dying on his lips whenever you pass on rare occasions.

One day, he brings a tray of food to your room himself, hoping to coax you into eating with something he’s cooked just for you. You answer the door, see him holding it, and shake your head without a word. Even if it looks delectable, like the dishes John would get.

“Please,” he says, his voice cracking. “I- just try a bit, hen.”

But you close the door before he can say more. He will try again and often, sometimes just leaving the tray, but you never touch it. You’ve lost weight, you know, and the only reason you are getting some nutrients at this point is because you occasionally sneak into the kitchens late at night for tiny snacks to tide you over. If Johnny knows it’s you, he’s never said anything.

Kyle is quieter, yet more present. The guilt eats away at him the most; he knows that his lack of care and respect had a part in the way the rest of the maids and staff treated you. He spends his evenings pacing the hall outside your room, his head bowed, mumbling apologies that you’ll never hear, wondering which one is best.

Once, he catches you in the garden alone, his mouth opening as if to speak, but you pass him without so much as a glance; you already know he won’t care for you have to say or ask for, he’ll just say he is busy, so you just don’t bother.

He stays frozen in place, his hand half-raised, the words stuck in his throat.

The servants, per Kyle and John’s orders, begin to change. Their guilt is slower to manifest, but it’s there and it’s evident in the way they rush to fulfill your needs despite your reluctance. They clean your room with quiet efficiency, no longer treating you like a burden, even though you hadn’t asked it of them. They leave fresh flowers on your desk and vanity, extra blankets on your bed, and freshly pressed gowns in your wardrobe.

You ignore all of it. It’s a waste of everyone’s time snd effort. You aren’t worth it.

Yet despite their heavy guilt, they return to and continue serving you.

But nothing changes the heaviness in your chest, the emptiness that refuses to leave.

One day, closer to the date of the annual winter gala hosted by the emperial family, you step into the dining room unannounced, your presence startling them all. It’s the first time you’ve joined them in weeks. You move slowly, your posture rigid and tired, your expression unreadable.

“Duchess,” John starts, his voice uncertain, rising from his seat.

“…John,” You sit without meeting his eyes, your movements slow and deliberate. The table is silent, the tension suffocating as John, Simon, and Kyle exchange uncertain glances.

John clears his throat. “It’s good to see you, wife.”

You don’t respond.

The meal is awkward, stilted, but it’s necessary for you; you need to get reused to John for your eventual reappearance in high society. Johnny offers you dishes with a hesitant, hopeful look in his eyes, and Kyle pours your wine with an unsteady grip. John and Simon try to start a conversation, but their words falter and fade when you don’t reply.

Still, they try. Over the following weeks, their efforts grow.

John begins carving out time to spend with you, awkwardly hovering near your door, waiting for even a crumb of acknowledgment. He starts leaving small notes for you- apologies and quiet promises to be better. They pile up on your desk, untouched but not thrown away. You want to believe, but you feel jaded and tired.

Simon offers you quiet companionship, instead. Standing at your side in the garden or library, saying nothing but ensuring you’re not alone. He speaks softly when he does talk, a one-sided conversation with only the occasional hum or noise from you, but he’s undeterred.

Johnny keeps cooking for you, leaving trays of food outside your door with little notes attached: Eat a bit, bonnie. Just for me. You don’t eat much, still have very little appetite, but you do start taking bites here and there, and it’s enough to keep him trying.

Kyle offers small acts of service- holding doors open for you, keeping anything you might need available at hanf, ensuring your rooms are kept warm and comfortable. His words are rare, but his actions speak of endless guilt and the quiet hope that he can earn even a sliver of forgiveness.

The maids and butlers follow suit, their movements quieter, their service more thoughtful. They stop muttering, their eyes full of remorse whenever they see you. They bow in respect, and no longer treat you as if you aren’t a part of the duchy.

But you keep them all at arm’s length. Their guilt is evident, their efforts genuine, but the wounds they’ve left on your heart are deep. Forgiveness, if it ever comes, will not be easily earned. For now, you let them try, watching their clumsy attempts with a mixture of numbness and quiet satisfaction (that you do feel guilty over, but truly can’t help).

Several weeks before the gala, John comes to your office. He sits down, and waits until you are finished with your paperwork before he speaks. You are in a beautiful dress- Simon’s gift- and your hair is in a delicate style, done by your maids. You look pretty. You feel nice, even if the numbness remains. These days, it’s less.

“Duchess, I was thinking,” he began, voice soft and patient. “it might do you some good to get away for a while. A change of scenery.”

You turned to look at him, the suggestion pulling you from your numb reverie. His blue eyes searched yours, and for once, there was no coldness, no distance. “Somewhere quiet,” he continued, “where you can rest… away from all of this.”

The idea of leaving the suffocating walls of the manor, and the heavy tension of the duchy was tempting. And yet, you hesitated, unsure if you could trust the gesture or if it was just another attempt to smooth over appearances.

“I’ll take care of everything,” he added quickly, as if sensing your doubt. “You won’t have to worry about a thing. You can choose who you’d like to go with, or even if you want to go alone. It’s entirely up to you, Duchess.”

Johnny and Kyle appeared in the doorway then, Kyle holding a tray with a steaming cup of tea, Johnny with a small, hopeful smile and a plate of your favorite biscuits. Even Simon lingered near the threshold, his gaze steady but tinged with something softer than usual.

They were all waiting for your answer, their expressions almost pleading. You could feel the weight of their guilt and the sincerity of their offer. It wasn’t much- not enough to erase everything that had passed- but it was something. A step forward.

“…I’ll think about it.” you said at last, your voice quiet but firm. And for the first time in a long while, you saw a flicker of relief in their eyes.

[okwonyo]

DAYDREAM, 或 𓈒𓈒 not kissing them.

❛𝗀𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗆𝖾 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗆𝗈𝗋𝖾 𝗄𝗂𝗌𝗌, 𝗄𝗂𝗌𝗌, 𝗄𝗂𝗌𝗌 𓈒𓈒 ❜

𝒾 ⠀⦂ ⠀ 엔하이픈 ୨୧ f ╱ r! 13OO fluff ── non idol au skinship kissing ⠀ ｡｡ ⠀ ( 𝑜𝑜𝑒𝑢𝑣𝑟𝑒𝑠 )

지아 ⠀⦂ ⠀whoever prayed for an okwonyo ot7 work ... hope you enjoy, luvdoll 💗

( ˊᗜˋreblogs&feedbacks · C𝑙𝑖CK )

HESEUNG

his favorite part of the day, especially after a very long day of work, is definitely coming home to you. 

he loves to wrap his arms around your form and kiss you softly as a greeting before even speaking. he loves to rush towards you as soon as you open the door in the slightest.

his world totally collapses around him when you dare to dodge his kiss.

mind you, not only his world but his heart too. it drops to his stomach when he tries again and you just do it again. 

his stares at you for a moment. you watch his face slowly fall in a sad frown while you fight the urge to let out the loudest laugh ever. 

“are you mad at me?” the bambi lookalike of a man asks you. it would be like his eyes would grow even sadder and bigger the longer you stay silent, “did i do anything wrong?”

and his voice is so soft— softer than ever due to the tiredness. you sigh fond noises instantly: 

you hold his face softly, as if he was a porcelain doll. “no, hee,” you kiss his pretty nose. “it was just a joke.”

he doesn’t leave you alone afterwards.

JAY

he knows as soon as he sees the malicious look in your eyes.

“give me a kiss,” he tries to be as intimidating as possible— but he has to bite his inner cheek to not smile too widely. 

he leans in, you lean away. his hand on the middle of your back presses your body against his own. 

his soft lips peck your cheek when he tries to kiss you again and you turn your head away.

therefore, the man opts for anything he can kiss instead. his kisses fall against your face like raindrops on a summer night, wet and refreshing. his kisses everywhere soft jaw and gentle neck makes you giggle. 

“jay,” you chuckle. your boyfriend embraces your waist, tight, “no—” there is a giggle from you again. “stop, it tickles.”

of course, he doesn’t listen and you swear his kisses get even wetter by the second. a loud ‘mwah!’  escape from his mouth whenever his mouth finds your skin. 

his entire weight rests on you whereupon your back hits the couch, “give me a kiss.”

you laugh while you try to get him off, “okay, okay.” 

he leaves a loud smooch on your mouth.

JAKE

calmly laying on your back, the soft cushions underneath you, your fingers massage your boyfriend’s hair. 

his head rests on your chest, like a puppy. the way he hums as you move your fingertips tells you that he is so close to drift off and you think he is too calm to not bother a bit. 

you decide that you will start by progressively stopping playing with his hair. the weight of your fingers on his laps gets lighter, and he slowly fully wakes up as it does so. 

when you completely stop, he lifts his huge puppy eyes to you— his eyebrows slightly furrowed as if he was a kicked puppy. 

you pick a confused expression to put on your face, tilting your head slightly to the side before whispering, “what?” 

your boyfriend doesn’t respond— and because he is obvious— you can already predict his next move. 

he gets his lips closer to yours and you do the same. they are almost touching before you pull away by one centimeter. 

then, you pull closer again, to kiss him he thinks, before doing the same. over and over. 

it doesn’t last before he just whines and hides his face in the crook of your neck. 

SUNGHOON

“i am not kissing you,” you state to him. his face's enthusiastic expression drops to a confused frown. “i hope you know that.”

it seems like he is processing the thought of what you just said while you stare at him, arms crossed under your chest. it also seems like the thought never really crossed his mind.

“you are not?” he asks, as if to be sure. you shake your head. “but, why?” 

from the couch, you stare at him. he stands tall, well dressed, his hair are beyond gorgeous and he smells too good to be staying indoors. 

he is fully ready to go, really, if it wasn’t for his goodbye kiss.

“you remember last time?” you question. continuing when he starts to smirk. “you were late to work: again.” and you add, just so it goes through his thick skull. “because we ended up making out.” 

you swear, he can’t just keep his hands to himself for more than one second and it always ends up in a disaster. 

he is still grinning when he talks again, “okay,” he holds his hands in surrender, before putting them behind his back. “see, not touching you.” 

he takes a step closer to you and bends over to put his face, approximately, at the same level as yours, “just one kiss.”

(it ends up not being just one kiss.) 

SUNOO

his hand flies to his heart as soon as you jump away from him. 

to your defense, you weren’t even aware of any sort of presence close to you, and who even just waits behind someone for a kiss. 

you cover your face with your hands, your eyes grow wide— just as melodramatic as the utterly shocked face on the surface of his face.

when shock wears off, a laugh resonate right from deep in your chest, “i’m so sorry,” you tell, reaching for his hands. 

“leave me alone,” he mutters, even though he gladly lets you pull him closer to you. “i don’t want a kiss anymore.”

you giggle, his voice has no bite in it. you rest your hands on his broad shoulders and gets on your tiptoes to be able to plant a kiss on your lover’s cheek. 

you peck him several times, one kiss after the other, his pouty demeanor slowly fading. 

his smile is felt on your lips when you kiss him on the mouth like he was longing for.

JUNGWON

“c’mon,” he tells you, almost pleading with you. 

you are not mad nor annoyed at him, but you like to make him work a little to get what he wants. 

“leave me alone,” you tell him back, pushing him away in the slightest to get out of the kitchen. 

he doesn’t let you go very far anyway, holding your wrist and pulling you right back where you were standing a few moments prior. 

you try to get out of his grip but this man just fights back, “stop!” you chuckle as you try to kick his knee and he dodges it. 

he somehow succeeds in catching both of your wrists to pull you in his embrace and wraps his biceps around your form. his blonde hair brushes on your skin as he leans closer to you. 

you lean the most far you can, but he stills captures your lips with his. 

you think he fought hard enough for what he wants, so you relax in his arms and smooch him back.

RIKI

this boy doesn’t really react when you refuse to kiss him for some—very annoying and stupid, he would qualify— reasons. he just lets it slide, surprisingly smoothly, to your surprise. 

what you are not aware of is that he thinks about it for days, weeks even, at night. looking for the day he can do the same to you.

because, yes, your boyfriend is petty like that. 

so here you are, going in for a kiss. the boy looks at you, waiting for you to be a little close. enough to feel his breath on your mouth. 

he swipes his head away when you almost reach him.

“are you serious?” you huff, incredulously and he ignores you. narrowing your eyes, you stare at him before shrugging, “fine.” 

he looks at the other with his arms crossed and a sulky demeanor until he realizes you are actually not going to kiss him again.

“wait no,” he turns to you, holding your arm to get your attention. “i was joking, come back.”

ㅤ𓈒ㅤㅤ𓈒 taglist open

[faebled-stories]

More Than Enough

Kinkvember Day 20: Tender/Body Appreciation

Red Velvet Joy (Park Sooyoung) x Male reader

AN: Much softer fic for today compared to the past couple ones.

The room was quiet except for the faint hum of the air conditioner and the occasional creak of the walls as the night settled in. You lay under the covers, your phone in hand, its soft glow casting faint shadows on the walls. The lavender scent from Sooyoung’s pillow surrounded you, mingling with the warmth of the sheets. It should have been comforting—everything about this space usually was—but tonight, it felt distant, like a faint echo of a memory you couldn’t quite reach.

That photo lingered in your mind, an unwelcome ghost haunting the edges of your thoughts.

You’d stumbled upon it earlier that week, scrolling aimlessly through social media. It appeared with cruel precision: Sooyoung’s ex, fully naked, entangled with the woman he’d cheated on her with. The image was intimate, raw, and brimming with confidence. But it wasn’t just his chiseled abs or the smug grin on his face—it was him.

His large, imposing frame; the effortless way he exuded certainty; and the undeniable size of his manhood, a detail impossible to ignore. It was the kind of comparison that clung to you, reshaping your perception of yourself no matter how much you tried to shake it.

No matter how many times you remind yourself that Sooyoung had chosen you, that she loved you, the doubts wouldn’t quiet. Did she ever look at him the way she looked at you? Did she tell him she loved him with the same tenderness? Did she mean it as much?

The sound of running water stopped, followed by the faint squeak of the shower handle turning. Moments later, the bathroom door opened, and a warm cloud of steam spilled out into the room. Sooyoung stepped through, her damp hair clinging to her shoulders, her bare skin glowing in the light that spilled out from behind her. Her bare feet padded softly across the hardwood floor as she crossed the room without hesitation, pulling back the covers to slip in beside you.

Her warmth enveloped you instantly, her body fresh from the shower, her skin carrying the faint, floral sweetness of her body wash. The scent blended with the lingering musk from your earlier intimacy, wrapping around you both like a cocoon. She nestled against your chest, her bare leg draping over yours, her damp hair brushing against your skin.

“You’re still awake?” she murmured, her voice soft and curious.

You quickly slipped your phone under the pillow, as if hiding it could keep the storm inside you from spilling out. “Yeah,” you said, forcing a weak smile. “Just… thinking.”

Sooyoung tilted her head, her eyes flicking upward to meet yours. Her fingers began tracing lazy patterns on your stomach, the motion light and soothing. “Hmm,” she hummed softly, her tone unconvinced but not pushing yet.

She shifted closer under the covers, the softness of her skin brushing against you, the heat of her body settling into yours. “I missed you,” she whispered, her voice tinged with affection. “All I could think about was coming home to you.”

Her words should have reassured you. Any other night, they would have. But tonight, they only deepened the ache in your chest. Why me? Why now? Why not him?

“You okay?” she asked after a moment, her fingers stilling against your chest. Her tone grew more serious, her brows furrowing slightly as she searched your face.

You nodded quickly, forcing your voice to sound steady. “Yeah, same as you—long day.”

She watched you for a moment longer, her gaze lingering like she was trying to read between the lines. Then she leaned up, her lips brushing softly against yours. The kiss was warm and familiar, but your mind remained distant. Her hands moved gently along your chest, her touch light, and while your body responded instinctively, the storm in your mind raged on.

Her fingers brushed your cheek, coaxing your attention back to her. She shifted slightly, straddling your lap under the covers, her movements fluid and unhurried. The golden light of the bedside lamp cast shadows along her face, highlighting the tenderness in her gaze. She kissed you again, her lips deliberate, her touch grounding.

“Sooyoung…” you murmured against her mouth, your voice faltering as the lump in your throat made it hard to speak.

She pressed her forehead to yours, her arms wrapping around your shoulders. “I love you,” she whispered, her breath warm against your skin. “Just be here with me, okay?”

Her words lingered in the quiet, their sincerity like a lifeline. She stayed close, her presence unwavering, her body flush against yours. Her warmth, her scent, the steady rhythm of her breathing—it should have been enough to pull you back.

“I needed this,” she murmured, her voice thick with affection. Her lips ghosted over your neck, her breath sending a shiver down your spine. “I’ve missed this—you, us.”

You nodded, your hands sliding down to her waist, fingers tracing the familiar curves of her body under the covers. Her skin was warm, her damp hair brushing against your forehead as she leaned closer. The rhythm of her touch—the way her fingers ghosted over your shoulders and the gentle roll of her hips—should have grounded you. It should have been enough.

But the dense fog of doubt lingered, clouding your thoughts even as she moved against you.

When she lowered herself onto you, her body trembled with a soft gasp, the sound sending a ripple of heat through you. Her back arched beautifully, her hands bracing against your chest as she adjusted to your shape. The intimate press of her body against yours was breathtaking, a perfect fit that always felt like home. Her hips began to move in a deliberate rhythm, slow and sensual, each roll igniting a spark of pleasure that spread through you both.

A soft moan escaped her lips, growing louder with each movement. The sound was raw and unrestrained, filling the quiet room with a symphony of her pleasure. Her head tilted back, her damp hair cascading down her shoulders as her body moved with an effortless grace, her chest rising and falling with every deliberate motion.

“You feel so good,” she whispered, her voice trembling as her hands slid into your hair, her fingers curling around the strands. Her lips brushed against your ear, her breath warm and uneven, sending a shiver down your spine. “You always do.”

Her words, thick with sincerity and affection, should have soothed the ache in your chest. But instead, they hung in the air, unable to pierce the storm swirling in your mind. Even as her body moved in sync with yours, even as her warmth surrounded you, the cruel questions persisted. Did she say this to him? Did he make her feel this way without even trying?

Your hands moved instinctively, finding her hips and guiding her rhythm, but every action felt detached, mechanical. Her soft cries of pleasure grew, her hands pressing into your chest as her pace quickened, chasing a climax that felt just out of reach. Her body clenched around you, her movements becoming more urgent as she lost herself in the moment.

The sight of her—her flushed skin, the way her lips parted as she gasped your name—should have pulled you deeper into the connection. But instead, you felt like an observer, watching from the outside as the weight of your insecurities rooted itself deeper in your chest.

“Don’t stop,” she gasped, her voice breaking with need as her hands slid back up to your shoulders. Her nails grazed your skin lightly, and her eyes met yours, shining with an unspoken trust that made your chest ache. “Right there… oh, God, baby, right there.”

Her words should have been intoxicating, the way her body moved against yours captivating. But even as her pleasure built, even as her cries filled the room, you couldn’t shake the bitterness that whispered cruel comparisons in your ear. You wondered if she looked like this with him, if he made her feel this uninhibited, this free.

When your release finally came, it surged through you like a tidal wave, intense but hollow. Your body tensed beneath hers, the pleasure wracking your frame even as guilt settled heavily in its wake. Her moans didn’t stop, her forehead pressing against yours as her breathing steadied, her soft, contented sigh brushing against your skin.

But you knew. You could feel it in the steadiness of her movements, in the subtle shift of her breathing compared to your own ragged gasps—she hadn’t reached her climax. She was still moving with slow, deliberate care, her arms wrapping around your shoulders as though she wanted to hold onto the intimacy a little longer.

“Baby,” she murmured, her voice soft and affectionate as she leaned forward to kiss your cheek. Her lips lingered there, warm and sweet, as if to reassure you without words. “That was amazing. You always make me feel so loved.”

Her words, though gentle and full of sincerity, twisted painfully under the weight of your doubts. She curled into your side, her bare leg draping over yours, the scent of her freshly washed skin mingling with the faint musk of your lovemaking. Her arm wrapped around your chest, her fingers tracing light, aimless patterns on your skin.

“I love you,” she whispered, her voice barely audible as she nuzzled against your neck, her breath warm and steady. Her body relaxed completely against yours, her contentment evident in the way she held you. For Sooyoung, this moment wasn’t about reaching a peak. It was about being close to you, about the intimacy you shared. To her, that was enough.

But the storm in your mind refused to relent. Instead of feeling closer, you felt further away, the hollow ache in your chest deepening as you stared at the ceiling. Her satisfaction, her affection, should have been enough to ease your insecurities. But they weren’t. Instead, they served as a reminder of how far you felt from the love she so freely gave.

You tightened your arm around her instinctively, holding her close even as your thoughts spiraled further. The soft rise and fall of her chest against yours, the warmth of her body curled into your side, should have been grounding. But instead, it underscored the gap between what you knew and what you felt.

Her breathing slowed, steady and even as sleep began to claim her. But you stayed awake, trapped in the endless loop of your thoughts, the same cruel questions circling endlessly in your mind.

-----

A couple of days after what you jokingly referred to as “failed love-making,” you lounged on the couch, legs stretched out, scrolling absently through your phone. The faint glow of the screen illuminated your face, contrasting with the soft, flickering light of the lavender-scented candle on the coffee table. The quiet murmur of the TV filled the room, casting muted colors across the walls. The scent of dinner lingered in the air—a gentle reminder of the shared meal that had made the evening feel warm and easy.

From the kitchen, you heard the faint clink of mugs against the countertop and the low hum of the electric kettle finishing its job. A moment later, Sooyoung appeared in the doorway, her silhouette framed by the kitchen’s warm light. She carried two steaming mugs of tea, their rich herbal aroma cutting through the lavender haze.

Her lips curved into a soft smile as she stepped into the living room, her presence immediately grounding you in the moment. “One chamomile honey tea, just for you,” she teased, setting a mug on the coffee table in front of you. The ceramic clicked softly against the wood before she sank into the cushions beside you, curling up at your side. The familiar scent of her vanilla body lotion drifted around you as she leaned into your shoulder.

You set your phone aside, smiling faintly. “Thanks, babe.” You picked up the mug, letting its warmth seep into your hands before taking a sip. The tea’s heat spread through your chest, the sweetness of honey lingering on your tongue.

Sooyoung rested her head on your shoulder, her hair tickling your neck as she shifted closer. “You smell nice,” she mumbled, her voice slightly muffled against you, her arm draping lazily across your chest. Her fingers toyed with the fabric of your shirt, tracing slow, absent patterns.

You chuckled lightly, tilting your head to brush your cheek against hers. “Do I?”

“Mmhmm.” She kissed your shoulder, the touch light and affectionate. “You always do.”

The room settled into an easy rhythm, the kind of silence that felt full rather than empty. The hum of the television mingled with the occasional creak of the house as the wind brushed against the windows. You loved these moments with Sooyoung—the way her presence could make everything else feel distant, the way she made you feel seen even when neither of you spoke.

Her fingers began tracing more deliberate patterns along your arm, sending a small shiver through you. “Guess what day it is?” she asked suddenly, her tone playful. Her lips curled into a knowing smile as she turned her face up to meet yours.

You chuckled. “Your favorite day of the week?” you guessed, already sensing where this was headed.

“Exactly,” she replied, her voice teasing as she reached up to guide your face toward hers. Her touch was familiar, but there was a quiet insistence to it that made your heart flutter. Without waiting for an answer, she leaned in, her lips meeting yours in a kiss that started soft but quickly deepened. Her fingers threaded through your hair, her body pressing closer to yours as she tilted her head to deepen the connection.

For a moment, the kiss felt like the only thing tethering you to the present. The way her lips moved against yours, warm and inviting, made the world fade away. You responded instinctively, your hands finding her waist and pulling her closer. Her body was warm against yours, her familiar scent wrapping around you like a comfort you couldn’t quite grasp.

But just as the kiss grew more heated, something inside you faltered. You pulled back slightly, breaking the connection. Your hands slipped from her waist as you leaned away, leaving a sudden, noticeable gap between you.

Sooyoung blinked, her brows furrowing slightly in confusion. “What’s wrong?” she asked softly, her hand lingering on your chest as if to steady you. Her eyes searched yours, gentle but concerned.

You offered a small, sheepish smile, but it felt hollow even as you forced it onto your face. “Nothing,” you muttered, turning slightly to grab your phone again. “I’m just… tired, I guess.”

Her frown deepened. “Tired?” she repeated, her voice laced with quiet disbelief. “We’ve been relaxing all evening.”

You shrugged, the motion feeling stiff even to you. “Yeah, I don’t know. Just not really in a… mood,” you said, fumbling for the right words to put a wall between you without outright lying.

She studied you for a moment, her gaze steady but soft. “You sure?” she asked again, her fingers brushing lightly against your arm in a small attempt to reconnect. Her voice held no judgment, just a quiet patience that made your stomach tighten.

“Yeah,” you said, forcing another weak smile. “It’s nothing, really.”

Sooyoung didn’t push further, though the worry in her eyes lingered as she leaned back slightly, giving you some space. She picked up her own mug, staring into it for a moment as though searching for the right thing to say. The warmth that had filled the room earlier seemed to shift, replaced by an almost tangible weight of unspoken tension.

The TV hummed faintly in the background, its muted sound blending with the occasional creak of the couch as you both shifted uncomfortably. Sooyoung glanced at you again, her fingers gripping her mug just a little tighter. “You’ve been different lately,” she said quietly, her tone gentle but direct. “I just… I want to help, if something’s going on.”

Her words hung in the air, filled with an earnest love that made your chest ache. But you couldn’t bring yourself to respond, couldn’t let her in past the wall you had built in your mind. Instead, you nodded faintly, murmuring, “I know,” even as your thoughts churned endlessly beneath the surface.

Sooyoung sighed softly, her hand resting on your arm. “I’m here, you know,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “I love you.”

The tea on the coffee table sat untouched, its steam long gone, forgotten as the once warm, comforting atmosphere shifted into something heavier. Sooyoung sat beside you, her posture relaxed but her eyes betraying the quiet concern she couldn’t quite hide. Her fingers traced absent patterns along the rim of her mug, the motion steady, as though distracting herself from the tension she couldn’t name.

You shifted slightly, leaning into her shoulder. For a brief moment, she stiffened, caught off guard, but then relaxed into the gesture. Her head tilted to rest against yours, her damp hair brushing against your cheek. The floral scent of her shampoo—sweet and familiar—enveloped you, a reminder of her love. It should have been comforting, but tonight, it only amplified the ache in your chest.

“You know you can tell me anything, right?” she said softly, her voice steady but quiet, like she was trying not to startle you. “I’m here. Whatever it is, I’m here.”

Your chest tightened. Her words struck deep, stirring something fragile inside you, but they also weighed heavily. You pressed a kiss to the top of her head, your lips brushing over her silky hair. You wanted to say it—to let the words pour out, to show her the toxic mess that had been swirling in your head ever since you’d seen that damn photo. But the thought of admitting it felt unbearable. How could you let her see this side of you? The smallness, the insecurity?

“I know,” you murmured, but the words sounded hollow, even to you. You tightened your hold on her, your arms wrapping around her like a shield against the storm in your mind. But no matter how close you held her, the distance between you remained—silent, unyielding.

Sooyoung nestled closer, her body warm and soft against yours. Her hand came to rest lightly on your chest, her fingers twitching ever so slightly, as if seeking reassurance. Though her gaze stayed fixed on the TV, you knew her mind was elsewhere. She didn’t understand why you were retreating, but her quiet determination was clear: she wasn’t going to give up. Not on you. Not on this.

After a long silence, she spoke again, her voice cutting through the heaviness like a lifeline. “I love it when we’re close like this,” she said, her tone soft but purposeful. Her fingers began tracing deliberate circles over your chest, the rhythm gentle and soothing. “It’s my favorite thing in the world. But it feels like you’re pulling away from me… and I don’t know why.”

Her words hit you like a punch to the gut. Guilt twisted in your stomach, a knot tightening with every second. You wanted to tell her the truth, to let her in, but the words stayed trapped. How could you explain something that felt so irrational? A picture from her past had no power—no right—to pull you apart like this. Yet it had. It made you feel small, inadequate, like you could never measure up.

“I’m not pulling away,” you said quietly, the lie brittle and fragile. It cracked as soon as you spoke it, shattering under the weight of your doubt. Turning slightly, you forced a smile, weak and transparent. “I promise.”

Sooyoung’s brow furrowed, her eyes narrowing as they searched yours. She wasn’t fooled. Her lip quirked down in a faint frown as she shifted back, just enough to face you fully. “Babe…” she started, her voice dropping to a whisper, tentative and vulnerable. “I can tell when something’s wrong. Did I do something? Say something?”

“No,” you interrupted quickly, the sharpness of your tone surprising even yourself. You sat up straighter, running a hand through your hair in frustration. “No, it’s not you. It’s not anything like that.” You tried to sound firm, but the words wavered, betraying your panic. The last thing you wanted was for her to think this was her fault.

“Then what is it?” she pressed, her voice soft but steady. She reached for your hand, her fingers slipping between yours with deliberate care. Her touch was grounding, her grip steady but gentle. “You don’t have to go through this alone. Whatever it is, I want to help. Please… just talk to me.”

Her words settled between you, warm and patient, her eyes locked on yours with a quiet intensity. Your throat tightened as the weight of what you hadn’t said pressed down on you, harder than ever. You glanced down at her hand, her fingers intertwined with yours, their warmth stark against the cold pit of doubt that churned in your stomach. You felt like you were standing on the edge of a cliff, teetering between burying the truth deeper and finally letting it out.

Sooyoung’s thumb brushed lightly over your knuckles, her touch insistent yet gentle. She wasn’t demanding; she was waiting—waiting for you to trust her with the parts of yourself you were so desperate to hide.

You swallowed hard, then abruptly pulled your hand away, standing up too quickly. “Can you drop it? I’m gonna make dinner,” you said hastily, the words spilling out like a defense mechanism. Without waiting for her response, you walked toward the kitchen, leaving her sitting on the couch in stunned silence.

The soft creak of the cushions and the faint rustle of her clothes as she shifted told you she hadn’t moved. You didn’t need to look back to feel the worry radiating from her. The quiet that followed wasn’t peace—it was thick, heavy, and suffocating.

In the kitchen, the sharp rhythm of your knife hitting the cutting board filled the silence, the vegetables beneath your hands blurring into indistinct shapes as you chopped. Your movements were harsher than necessary, the tension in your chest pressing harder with every slice. The air around you felt stifling, amplifying every sound—the muted clink of utensils, the scrape of the knife on wood, and the occasional creak of the floor as you shifted your weight.

Your phone buzzed against the counter, the vibration rattling like an alarm. You didn’t even glance at it. “Hey,” you called out, louder than you intended. “Can you check my phone? I think I got a message.”

From the living room, Sooyoung stirred, the sound of her soft footsteps growing louder as she approached. “Sure,” she said, her voice careful but curious.

When she picked up your phone, its screen lit up, illuminating the recent searches you hadn’t closed. Her breath caught, her fingers freezing mid-swipe. The words stared back at her, stark and unrelenting: “Red Velvet’s Sooyoung’s ex-boyfriend leak,” “size comparison,” “how to get over feeling inadequate.”

Her chest tightened as the realization settled over her. This was it. This was why you had been distant. Why your warmth had felt muted and your touches hesitant. She felt the weight of it like a lead blanket pressing down on her chest.

“Hey…” she said softly, her voice trembling as she set the phone back on the counter.

At the counter, your chopping faltered, the steady rhythm halting mid-slice. You didn’t turn around, your back stiff and unmoving. "Yeah?" you said, trying to sound casual, but the tightness in your voice betrayed you. The knife hovered in your hand, your grip tightening as if bracing for what was coming.

Behind you, Sooyoung placed the phone carefully on the counter, as though handling something fragile. She took a slow, deliberate breath before stepping closer. "Why didn’t you tell me?" she asked quietly, her voice clear but filled with a mix of hurt and gentle understanding.

The words hit you like a gut punch. Your shoulders tensed, and you turned slowly, your puzzled expression crumbling as your eyes darted to the phone. The realization hit you like a tidal wave, knocking the air from your lungs. Shame crashed over you, heavy and suffocating, as you stared at her. Your lips parted, but no words came out.

"I… I didn’t want you to see that," you muttered finally, your voice brittle, barely above a whisper. Vulnerability clung to your tone, foreign and uncomfortable, as if laying this part of yourself bare was an admission of weakness.

Sooyoung’s expression softened instantly. Her loving eyes brimmed with compassion as she closed the gap between you. "Why not?" she asked gently, her voice a soothing balm to your frayed nerves. "Why didn’t you tell me you’ve been feeling this way?"

You let out a shaky breath, running a hand through your hair as you looked away, your gaze dropping to the counter. "Because it’s stupid," you muttered, frustration thick in your voice. "I saw those pictures of your ex… and I couldn’t stop comparing myself to him. To that."

Her brows knitted together in confusion and sadness. "The leaked photos?" she asked, her tone soft but tinged with disbelief.

"Yeah," you admitted, your voice barely audible. Your hands gripped the edge of the counter, the tension in your knuckles matching the turmoil inside you. "I know it’s dumb. I know it doesn’t matter, but I can’t stop thinking about how he looked—how he fits this perfect image. And me? I don’t feel like I measure up. I’ve been feeling like I’m… not enough for you. Like maybe you’re just being nice, and compared to him…" Your voice cracked, and you exhaled deeply, the confession draining the last of your resolve. "I’m lacking."

Sooyoung’s face crumpled at your words, the weight of your insecurity hitting her squarely. She stepped even closer, her hand reaching out to rest gently on your arm. Her touch was warm and grounding, her eyes swimming with love and concern. "Why would you ever think that?" she whispered, her voice trembling but steady.

You let out a bitter chuckle, shaking your head as you avoided her gaze. "Because it’s obvious," you said, the words sharp and cutting, more directed at yourself than her. "I’ve seen the pictures, Sooyoung. I can see the difference between me and him. I’m nowhere close—"

"Stop," she interrupted, her voice firm yet calm. Her fingers tightened slightly on your arm, anchoring you in the moment. "That doesn’t matter. None of that matters."

Her words caught you off guard, and your gaze lifted to meet hers. What you saw in her eyes made your breath catch. There was no judgment, no pity—only love. Pure, unwavering, and steadfast.

"It’s hard not to compare," you said quietly, your voice trembling. "Especially when I feel like I’ll never measure up to… that."

Sooyoung stepped closer, her other hand rising to gently cup your cheek. Her thumb brushed softly against your skin, the gesture tender and deliberate. "Listen to me," she said, her voice soft but resolute. "You are enough for me. More than enough. I don’t care about some stupid photo or what anyone else looks like. What we have—what you give me—is everything I could ever want. You make me feel loved, cherished, and wanted in ways no one else ever could. Only you."

Her words hit like a wave, washing over the raw edges of your insecurity. The sincerity in her tone, the quiet strength in her gaze—it was impossible to deny. Slowly, the knot in your chest began to loosen, the weight of your self-doubt easing under the warmth of her love.

She leaned in, pressing her forehead gently against yours. Her presence, her touch, her words—it all grounded you in what was real. "I love you," she whispered, her breath warm against your lips. "All of you. Just as you are."

Your chest tightened, her words settling deep into your heart. The warmth in her tone was undeniable, yet the insecurities clinging to you still lingered, like shadows at the edges of your mind.

Sooyoung noticed the flicker of doubt in your eyes and leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. Her lips lingered there, warm and comforting. "I mean it," she whispered, her voice gentle but steady. "It’s not about size or comparing yourself to anyone else. When I’m with you, everything feels right because I love you. All of you."

You closed your eyes, letting her words wash over you like a calm tide. For a fleeting moment, the tension in your chest eased, though the grip of doubt still tugged faintly at the edges. "It’s hard to let go of these thoughts," you admitted softly, your voice almost a whisper.

"I know," she replied, her tone filled with quiet understanding. She slid her hand into yours, intertwining your fingers with a deliberate tenderness. "Everyone has insecurities. But as your girlfriend, it’s my job to show you how much you mean to me. How much I want you, just the way you are."

You opened your eyes, meeting hers. Her gaze was steady, brimming with patience and love, leaving no room for judgment or doubt. There was something in the way she looked at you—an unshakable belief in who you were. For the first time in days, a flicker of hope sparked within you, cutting through the storm clouds.

Sooyoung smiled softly, leaning in to kiss you again. This time, her lips moved slower, deeper, as if pouring every shared memory, every ounce of affection, into the moment. The warmth of her touch pulled you from the depths of your insecurities, anchoring you in the present.

As the kiss deepened, you felt yourself melting into her, the weight of her love wrapping around you like a protective cocoon. The doubts still lingered in the background, but their grip began to loosen, her touch drawing you closer to the present. Sooyoung broke the kiss softly, her breath warm against your lips as she whispered, “Lie down with me.”

Her hand in yours was gentle yet insistent as she led you to the bed. You settled onto the soft mattress, the weight of your body sinking into the familiar comfort. She climbed in beside you, her eyes steady as they searched yours. The insecurities began creeping back in, but her presence—steady and warm—provided a tether you desperately needed.

Sooyoung sat beside you, her fingers moving to the buttons of your shirt. She began unbuttoning it slowly, her touch deliberate and filled with tenderness. Her gaze remained fixed on yours, silently reassuring you that this was about love, not expectation. But your hands instinctively rose to stop her, trembling slightly as they met hers.

"I… I don’t know if—" you started, your voice barely audible, thick with hesitation. Your throat felt tight, every doubt screaming louder with each undone button. "Baby, maybe we shouldn’t—"

She froze, her fingers stilling mid-motion. Her eyes softened, filled with understanding rather than frustration. “Hey,” she said gently, her voice low and soothing. She rested her fingers lightly on yours, her touch calm but grounding. “It’s just me. It’s us. We’ve done this before.”

Your gaze darted away, your chest rising and falling unevenly. "I know," you murmured, your voice raw, "but it feels different this time." The words hung between you, unspoken fears filling the silence.

Sooyoung’s heart ached at the vulnerability in your voice. She leaned closer, her palm slipping under your chin to gently lift your gaze back to hers. “I know it’s hard,” she said softly, her tone steady and full of love. “But you don’t have to compare yourself to anyone. Especially not to that cheating scum. I love you. You are enough, babe. You’ve always been enough for me.”

Her words struck something deep within you, and for a moment, you simply stared at her, caught between belief and doubt. Without breaking eye contact, she reached for the hem of your shirt, lifting it slowly. “Let me,” she whispered, her voice tender yet resolute. "Let me show you how much you mean to me."

Hesitation flickered in your mind, but you nodded, exhaling shakily as she slipped the shirt from your shoulders and let it fall to the floor. The cool air brushed against your skin, but her warmth surrounded you, steady and unyielding.

Sooyoung leaned down, pressing soft kisses along your collarbone and chest, her lips lingering on each spot as though pouring love into you with every touch. “Every part of you… it’s perfect,” she murmured, her breath warm against your skin. “You’re more than enough for me, baby. I love you so much, just the way you are.”

Her words sent a flicker of warmth through you, momentarily quieting the storm in your mind. Her touch was soft but grounding, the press of her lips against your skin both reassuring and intimate. But when her hands moved to your belt, you instinctively stopped her, your hand wrapping around hers.

"Wait," you muttered, your voice trembling. "Are you sure about this?" The question carried more weight than it should have, heavy with fear and doubt.

Sooyoung stilled, sitting back slightly to meet your gaze fully. Her hands cupped your face gently, her thumbs brushing over your cheeks with tender precision. “Babe, look at me,” she said softly, her voice unwavering. Her eyes locked with yours, filled with a love that was steady and unshakable. "You are everything to me. Not just enough—everything. Do you understand that?"

You swallowed hard, her words settling into the quiet corners of your heart. The sincerity in her voice, the conviction in her gaze—it was impossible to ignore. Still, the doubts lingered faintly, shadows refusing to fully disappear.

She pressed a kiss to your forehead, her lips lingering for a moment before pulling back to meet your eyes again. “I love you,” she said firmly, her tone low and soothing. "I love all of you. Your heart, your mind, your body—every part of you is enough for me. Nothing else matters. Do you hear me?"

Her words were a lifeline, cutting through the fog of your thoughts. The tension in your shoulders eased slightly, and you nodded, her love chipping away at the walls you had built. Sooyoung’s hands moved lower again, unbuckling your belt and sliding it off with care. Her movements were deliberate, her touch imbued with patience and love.

As she settled on the bed beside you, Sooyoung’s warmth pressed against your side. The soft rustle of the covers surrounded you both, her bare leg brushing against yours. Her presence was steady and grounding, a quiet reassurance as she nestled closer. Her hands found your thighs, resting there lightly as her gaze met yours, filled with love and intention.

She broke the silence first, her voice soft but resolute. “I love you,” she said, her words wrapping around you like a promise. “You don’t ever have to hide from me.” Her fingers trailed along your skin, her touch both tender and deliberate. In that moment, her love felt like the only thing anchoring you to the present, quieting the whispers of insecurity.

She leaned over you, her eyes searching yours. “Don’t,” she murmured, her voice gentle but firm. “Don’t hide from me. I want all of you. I love all of you.”

Her words sent a wave of emotion through you, tightening your throat as you swallowed hard. Nodding, you fought to push the lingering doubts aside, though your chest still felt heavy with the weight of insecurity. “I’m sorry for feeling like this,” you murmured, the words barely audible, more for yourself than for her.

Sooyoung cupped your face with both hands, her thumbs brushing lightly against your cheeks. Her gaze never wavered. “Don’t apologize,” she said softly, her voice steady. “I love you. Let me show you.”

She shifted lower on the bed, her movements slow and deliberate, and urged you to relax. Her hands moved to the waistband of your boxers, her fingers light but confident. When she began to guide them down, you hesitated, but the warmth in her touch and the reassurance in her eyes quieted the protest forming on your lips. You let her, exhaling slowly as the vulnerability of the moment settled over you.

Sooyoung’s gaze remained steady as she leaned down, her lips brushing against the sensitive skin at your base. She kissed you softly, reverently, her touch full of care. Each kiss was deliberate, her lips warm and tender as they trailed along your length. “You’re perfect to me,” she whispered, her voice low and affectionate, her words wrapping around you like a shield against your doubts.

Her lips pressed to the underside of your length, trailing slowly upward before settling at the tip. She kissed it gently, her breath warm against your skin as she lingered there. Her eyes flicked up to meet yours, and the love in her gaze made your chest tighten. “I don’t need anything else, baby,” she murmured between kisses. “You, just like this, are everything I’ve ever wanted.”

Her words weren’t just comforting; they carried a conviction that chipped away at the insecurities buried deep in your heart. Her hands caressed your thighs, steadying you as her kisses grew more purposeful. She alternated between slow, lingering movements and light, teasing flicks of her tongue, her care evident in every touch. She paused only to meet your gaze again, her lips curving into a soft smile. “You’re mine,” she said simply, her voice a quiet anchor in the storm of your thoughts.

Her kisses grew bolder, her tongue tracing gentle patterns along your length. Each motion was deliberate, her touch imbued with affection. She would press a kiss at the base, then trail upward slowly, her breath ghosting over you before she took you in again. Her rhythm was unhurried, savoring every moment as though she wanted to commit every inch of you to memory.

Her hands found their way to your hips, holding you gently but firmly as her lips worked in perfect harmony with her tongue. She alternated between soft, teasing motions and deeper, more purposeful movements, her love for you evident in the care she put into every second. She paused briefly, pressing a kiss to your inner thigh before returning to you, her lips brushing tenderly against your sensitive skin.

“You feel so good,” she murmured, her breath warm as she glanced up at you. Her eyes were soft, filled with a love that made your chest ache in the best way. “Every single part of you feels amazing to me.”

Her pace quickened slightly, her enthusiasm blending with her tenderness as she coaxed pleasure from you. The warmth of her mouth, the deliberate pressure of her lips, and the way her hands anchored you to the bed all worked in perfect harmony. She wasn’t just focused on giving you pleasure—she was showing you, through every touch and motion, how much you meant to her.

The tension in your chest began to ease, her devotion replacing the doubts that had weighed you down for days. Her actions weren’t just about intimacy; they were a testament to her love, her desire to remind you of your worth. Slowly, you began to relax under her touch, letting yourself feel the truth in her actions.

When she looked up at you again, her gaze locked with yours, and you saw nothing but love and pride in her eyes. “Let me take care of you,” she whispered, her lips brushing against your skin before she continued. Her hands slid up to cradle your thighs, grounding you as she poured every ounce of her affection into her touch.

With a final kiss to your tip, Sooyoung sealed all the words that had been spoken, her affection tangible in every lingering touch. She pulled back slowly, her movements unhurried, and began to undress herself. The glow of the bedside lamp bathed her skin in a soft, golden light, accentuating every curve and detail of her body. Her beauty was undeniable, but it wasn’t just the physical sight of her—it was the love in her gaze, the tenderness in her actions, that left you breathless.

Her eyes remained locked on yours as she revealed herself, her confidence tempered with vulnerability, as if she were offering all of herself to you. “You don’t have to worry anymore, baby,” she whispered, her voice low and soothing. Her lips found your neck, pressing soft kisses along the sensitive skin there, each one leaving behind a trail of warmth. “I love you just the way you are. You make me feel alive, cherished… no one else could ever do that for me the way you do.”

Her words were like a balm, easing the tightness in your chest as her hands slid over your shoulders and down your chest, grounding you in her touch. The lingering insecurities that had plagued you began to melt away, their sharp edges softened by the undeniable truth in her gaze. She didn’t just see you—she saw all of you, the parts you tried to hide, the parts you feared were unworthy, and she loved them unconditionally.

She gently guided you onto the bed, her bare skin pressing warmly against yours. The intimacy of her closeness filled the room, the heat between you building with every whispered reassurance and every deliberate movement. Slowly, deliberately, she straddled you, her body fitting against yours like a missing piece. She guided you to her entrance, her breath hitching as she sank down onto you, her body enveloping you fully. Her loud, impassioned moan filled the room, sending a shiver of electricity through you as you gasped at the overwhelming sensation.

Sooyoung’s hips began to move in a slow, deliberate rhythm, each motion uniting you more completely. The way she moved against you was mesmerizing—graceful and instinctive, as though your bodies had been made for each other. Her hands rested on your chest for balance, her fingers splaying wide as her breath quickened, her soft moans filling the space between you.

“You feel so good,” she whispered, her voice trembling with sincerity as she leaned down, her damp hair brushing against your skin. Her lips sought yours in a kiss that was deep and full of emotion, her love pouring into every movement. “You’re everything to me, baby. Everything.”

Her words were an anchor, steadying you as her love reached places no one else ever could. Each thrust sent ripples of pleasure through both of you, but it wasn’t just the physical sensation—it was the emotional connection, the unspoken bond that made every moment between you feel transcendent. Every sigh, every shiver, every roll of her hips was a declaration of love, weaving the two of you closer together.

As the intensity grew, her words began to cut through your lingering insecurities. “I’m so close,” she gasped, her voice trembling with need. “Baby, you’re going to make me cum—please, don’t stop.”

The sincerity in her tone and the raw desire in her eyes filled you with a newfound confidence. She wasn’t holding back, and you could feel how deeply she meant every word. Your hands instinctively moved to her hips, steadying her movements as she rode you with increasing fervor. Her body moved like it was made for yours, her rhythm deliberate and unrestrained. You began meeting her movements with your own, thrusting upward to match the rhythm she set.

Her moans grew louder, her head tilting back as her body arched above you, her hands bracing against your chest for support. The sight of her—so vulnerable, so open—sent a surge of heat through you. You tightened your grip on her hips, your thumbs brushing against the soft curves of her waist as you pushed deeper into her, each upward thrust eliciting another shuddering gasp.

“Yes,” she cried, her nails grazing your chest as her rhythm quickened. “Just like that—baby, just like that.”

Her encouragement was electric, spurring you on as you focused entirely on her—her movements, her sounds, the way her body trembled with every thrust. The insecurities that had clung to you earlier began to crumble under the weight of her love, replaced by an overwhelming need to give her everything you had.

“I love you,” you whispered, your voice hoarse and filled with conviction. The words came naturally now, unburdened by hesitation. Her eyes snapped down to meet yours, her gaze softening even as her body moved with raw intensity.

“I love you too,” she gasped, her voice breaking as her climax built. “You’re perfect—you’re everything.”

Her words struck a chord deep within you, breaking through the last remnants of doubt. You met her movements with more purpose, your hips thrusting upward in perfect sync with hers. Every shared movement, every brush of her hands against your skin, every moan and sigh felt like a crescendo building toward something beyond either of you.

Her cries grew urgent, her body tightening as she tipped closer to the edge. “Oh my God, baby, I’m gonna—” Her words dissolved into a sharp cry as her climax overtook her, her body shuddering violently around you. She clung to you, her hands gripping your shoulders as her head tipped back, her moans filling the room in waves of ecstasy.

The sensation of her pulsing around you, the sheer intensity of her release, sent you spiraling after her. With a final, powerful thrust, your own climax hit, a blinding wave of pleasure that seemed to consume you entirely. Stars danced behind your closed eyes, the high of your release magnified by the connection between you. It wasn’t just physical—it was emotional, almost transcendent, as if the love you shared heightened every sensation to an unimaginable degree.

You groaned deeply, your hands gripping her hips tightly as you held her against you, your bodies locked together in the aftershocks of your shared release. Sooyoung collapsed forward, her arms wrapping around your shoulders as her forehead rested gently against yours, her breaths warm and uneven.

For several moments, the room was silent except for the sound of your mingled breathing. Her body was warm and soft against yours, her skin glistening in the dim light of the room. You ran your hands slowly along her sides, grounding yourself in the reality of her love, the tangible proof that you were enough for her.

Sooyoung tilted her head up, her eyes soft and bright as they searched yours. A gentle smile curved her lips, and she reached up to brush a strand of hair from your forehead, the touch light but deliberate. “That…” she began, her voice barely above a whisper, “I know you felt that. It was different than before—way better, right? It’s because we love each other so much.”

Her words lingered in the air, heavy with meaning, as she leaned in closer. Her lips pressed delicate kisses along your face, each touch deliberate and tender, scattering warmth across your skin. The kisses weren’t rushed; they were unhurried, like a ritual of devotion. Her lips found your temple first, then the corner of your jaw, the softness of each kiss leaving a trail of emotion in its wake.

“Please remember,” she murmured between kisses, her voice trembling with raw emotion, “no matter who I was with, no matter his size…” Her lips brushed against your forehead, her breath warm and steady as she paused there for a moment. She moved to your cheek next, her kiss lingering as if to reassure you of her every word. “I… have… never…” she whispered, her voice breaking slightly as her lips found yours in a deep, loving kiss. “Had a… orgasm… so… hard… in… my… life.”

Each word came with a kiss, sealing her declaration with her affection. Her voice carried unwavering sincerity, her eyes brimming with honesty when she pulled back to meet your gaze. The depth of her love was palpable, wrapping around you like a cocoon of safety and affirmation.

A soft laugh escaped you, unsteady but full of relief, as her words took root in your heart. The insecurities that had haunted you began to dissolve, their weight lifting and replaced by the undeniable warmth of her truth. Unable to hold back, you pulled her closer, your arms wrapping securely around her. Her body molded to yours, soft and warm, and the way she melted into your embrace sent a wave of peace rippling through you.

The sound of her steady breathing became your anchor. Sooyoung lay curled against you, her head resting on your chest, her fingers tracing absent patterns on your skin. The warmth of her body was grounding, her presence filling the gaps where doubt once lived.

Her voice broke the silence, soft but certain. “You don’t have to hide from me. I love you—all of you. Just the way you are.”

Her words lingered in the air, heavy with meaning. You tightened your arm around her, pulling her closer, but still, the weight of your insecurities tugged at the edges of your thoughts.

She shifted, pressing her forehead to yours, her damp hair brushing your skin. Her breath was warm, steady. “I’ve never felt this way with anyone,” she murmured, her voice thick with emotion. “No one makes me feel loved like you do. You are my everything.”

Her words were a lifeline, pulling you out of the storm that had raged in your mind. You cupped her face, brushing a thumb over her cheek, and saw it clearly—the love, the truth, the unshakable certainty in her eyes.

“I love you,” you said, the words finally free of hesitation. “I don’t know why you chose me, but… I’m so glad you did.”

Her lips curved into a tender smile, her eyes shining. “Because you’re the one who makes me feel like this. You’re the one I want—forever.”

She leaned down, her lips brushing yours in a kiss that was slow and deliberate. It wasn’t rushed; it wasn’t about anything but love—pure, unfiltered, and real. The doubts that had haunted you began to fade, replaced by the steady warmth of her love.

As she nestled against your chest, her arms wrapping tightly around you, you realized something profound. This wasn’t about perfection or comparison. It wasn’t about the shadows of a past you couldn’t change. It was about her—the way she saw you, the way she loved you.

And for the first time, you felt it fully. It was enough. She was enough. You were enough.

The room grew quiet again, your bodies entwined, the world outside distant and unimportant. Her breathing steadied, her warmth a cocoon around you, and as you pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head, peace finally settled over you.

In her arms, the storm quieted. The insecurities that had loomed so large felt smaller now, dissolving in the light of her love. And as her fingers traced one last, languid pattern on your chest, you closed your eyes, letting yourself believe—truly believe—that you were exactly where you belonged.

[thesecondhandwoman]

NEW HAIRCUT

Sevika x f!reader

Summary: Your girlfriend, Sevika, decided that it was time for a new appearance, a new her. But, she may have messed up more than intended, resulting in a sweet moment of you being there to help her.

“God, what did you do to your hair, Sevy?” you asked as you walked into the bathroom, intending to check on your girlfriend after her being hidden in the room for hours, only to be met with a hairy mess on the bathroom tile and Sevika holding scissors in her hand, now staring at you like a deer and headlights.

The scissors in her hand were midway cutting another chunk of her hair when they stopped as you interrupted her with…whatever this was.

It seemed like an attempt at a new haircut, but turned out to look like a child who had chosen not to listen to their mother’s warning about not using the scissors for unneeded reasons such as chopping their hair off and suddenly looking like a porcupine, hair up and down, long and short.

“I–” The words for a possible excuse got caught in her throat as she stared at you, slowly lowering the scissors down onto the counter. She caught a glimpse of the cut off hair in the process, staring at her feet momentarily, which made her look like a guilty or even lost puppy before looking back at you. “--I thought it was time for a new look, maybe.”

You stared at her, a tad bit surprised at the fact she wanted to cut her hair. Afterall, she had been growing it out for a long time, but then again, a lot has gone on since then. For example, Silco dropped flat off the planet after the incident with Jinx, Sevika had been taking control of Zaun because of Silco’s absence and the repercussions it had brought, and she had pretty much become a second parent with you now that you both had to watch after Jinx and Isha, the little kid that Jinx found only a few weeks ago (both complete troublemakers, but found family).

“But I am kind of shitty at this type of stuff.” She grumbled, snapping you out of your thoughts as she glanced up at the mirror and grimaced at her poor job in a personal haircut, the strands cut at different lengths and angles.

It could all be summed up to be classified as a mess, but even that may have been an understatement at the moment because of what Sevika did, or at least tried to do.

You couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle, a smile creeping on your face as you agreed with her statement. Still, you couldn’t help but also find her attempt adorable, the way she looked like a disheveled messwith that fussy pout on her face, no longer hidden when she looked up at the mirror. But then again, you couldn't blame her for such an expression.

All you could really do was agree with the fact that maybe it was time for a new look, and as her girlfriend, you would be there to help her with it, even if it seemed a bit impossible from this angle. But, it was worth taking a shot at for her.

“Alright, hand me the scissors and hair clippers.” you said with a hum of thought as you walked over to her, inspecting her hair until an image came up to possibly fix this mess on her head and please sevika at the same time with the new look it was going to have.

Sevika arched a brow, confusion written on her face when she saw that specific glint in your eyes, one both imaginative but just as dangerous. But she didn’t question out loud as she carefully handed you the scissors, followed by the hair clipper after she got it out of the bag on the side of the bathroom counter. While doing it, she looked at you from the mirror, slight hesitation in her eyes, but it didnt seem directed toward you, and it usually never was you. So, it had to be somewhat linked with the idea of a new look, maybe even the slight hint of a noticeable identity crisis behind it.

Being able to notice this, you immediately went to reassure her by placing a kiss on her temple and saying, “It will look great on you, baby…”

Her doubtful expression slowly disappeared as she took in your reassurance, a hum escaping her lips as your lips met her temple, a soft smile growing on her lips. “Mm, whatever you say, doll.”

You smiled some more and waited until she was fully coaxed before plugging in the clippers and pushing the button upwards, feeling the way it vibrated against your right hand as the cold metal of the scissors brushed against your left.

As you began to finally cut her hair, the room was filled with the sound of the clippers buzzing against her black locks and the scissors lightly snipping at the remaining ends to clean it up a bit. It only continued for a bit longer until it fell quiet again, finishing up with the clank of both objects being set down on the counter and the sound of you shuffling through the drawers to grab the stored mirror.

“And done!” You announced with a smile, looking at Sevika through the main mirror, waiting for her reaction to her new, fixed-up haircut. You made sure to position the smaller mirror in the process, angling it just enough to see the back of her head where the slight undercut was beneath.

Removing her hands from her eyes (a request you made part way through cutting her hair), Sevika glanced up at the mirror, looking at her improved haircut for the first time. Her expression almost softened immediately, a glint appearing in her eyes as she absorbed her new appearance, taking in the way her hair was much shorter, the strands looking cleaned up, and the overall cut complimenting her features.

All of it caused her a smile to grow on her face, a breathless chuckle leaving her lips as she finally said: “It’s amazing, doll..”

Your smile grew at her reaction, one you wanted so much that your heart warmed with happiness as you hugged her from behind, head resting on the back of her shoulder.

“I told you that it would look great on you.” You pointed out again, beaming at her from the mirror view.

Her smile speaded across her face at your repeated reassurance, now believing it fully as she turned around to look at you. She took your cheek into her hand and leaned forward, gently kissing your bottom lip, allowing you to feel how real her smile was versus just seeing it.

“Thank you, love.” She mumble against your lips, looking down at you with a much relaxed expression.

“Anytime, baby.” You replied before kissing her again, wrapping your arms around her neck gently tangling your fingers into her shorter hair. “Anything to help you out..”

[worldofstoriesanddreams]

Is there an age limit? Part 2

“For me?” The annoying red-clad giant of a man who was all sunshine and diabetes-inducing puppies bounced around. He played with the communicator Batman handed to him as if it were a shiny new toy.

“I can’t believe I’m in the Justice League!” The Herculean man-child squealed, grinning like an imbecile. “Somebody, kick me. Show me I’m not dreaming!” 

Guy Gardner was too happy to oblige. 

“My pleasure.”

His signature kick - a brutal, no-holds-barred move - would send a seasoned fighter flying across the floor. Guy delivered one of his specialties to Captain Whitebread.

Crack!

“My leg!” 

Agony ripped from his foot, up his leg, as he felt his bones shatter upon impact with that brick wall of a man.

“I broke my leg!” He hopped to the nearest seat, clutching his foot, hoping to earn sympathy points with Ice. 

The cold beauty looked away.

Instead, the Big Red Cheese hovered towards him.

“I’m so sorry.” The overgrown baby - who was made of concrete - had the audacity to offer him a hand. 

“Can I help you?”

“Nah, Guy’s just being Guy,” Hal pulled Justice League’s newest recruit away. “You must see our recreation rooms!”

Superman, one of the Big Three, intercepted them. 

“Wait, Cap,” he dangled a set of keys in front of Captain Whitebread. 

“You get the room beside mine,” Superman grinned as the big blue boy scout wrapped his arm around the cheesy red boy scout. 

He behaved as if Cap was his twin brother. “I’ll show you your private quarters!”

Guy’s jaw dropped as he turned as green as his ring.

While every member of the Justice League had a private room in the Watchtower, a cluster of four rooms were considered prime estate. Three of the four prestigious rooms were taken by the Big Three - Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman. 

Captain Whitebread gets the fourth? 

It is as good as telling the hero community that the dolt is one of the Big Four.

Guy knew he deserved that honour far more than that joke of a hero.

 *

“Holy Moley!” Captain Marvel’s gawked at his private quarters. “Is this for me?”

“All yours,” Superman grinned, spreading out his arms. 

His fellow Kryptonian’s childlike wonder was a welcome change from the jaded cynicism, or even worse, the self-important grandeur of some heroes.

“Can this room handle lightning strikes?” Captain Marvel ran his hand over a wall.

“Well,” Superman rock on the back of his heels. 

“We are in space, so there is no lightning out here. But it can withstand intense heat, radiation, corrosive environments and physical stress, so I’d imagine it can handle a regular thunderstorm.”

Marvel frowned, in thought. “Can it handle over a billion volts at more than 30,000 degrees Celsius?”

“I’m not sure if anything can handle that,” Superman replied.

“May not be an issue if….” Captain Marvel’s face lit up with a dazzling grin. 

“Never mind. I know what to do.” He chuckled. 

“Wisdom of Solomon,” he tapped his head.

Cap’s eyes bugged out at the fully stocked mini-fridge and pantry. He picked up a can of beer. “I’m sure you must be a certain age to drink these,” he frowned.

Superman wasn’t a fan of alcohol either. It had no effect on his Kryptonian physiology. He didn’t fancy the taste. 

“I don’t like beer or alcohol either. It might be a Kryptonian thing,” he beamed, more certain than ever that he was no longer the last of his kind. “I had mine swapped for milk,” he grinned. “I can arrange that for you too.”

“That would be cool!” Cap looked delighted. “Can I have chocolate milk?”

Cap behaved like a kid let loose in a toy shop as Superman showed him the room’s features.

“The bed and walls are reinforced, but cannot withstand our strength, if you toss and turn in your sleep,” Superman warned. “Do you sleepwalk?”

“No,” Cap pursed his lips. “I’ll power down before bed so it shouldn’t be an issue.”

Power down? Does Marvel have portable red sun lamps? 

That’s a brilliant idea he could adopt.”

For the rest of the morning, Superman had the pleasure of showing his new brother the rest of the Watchtower.

“Superman, this place is awesome!” Cap remarked

“Call me Kal,” Superman replied. 

“Okay Kal. You were saying you have Polar Bears in your Fortress of Solitude. Can I play with them?” Marvel pleaded with large, puppy eyes.

“Sure, Will-em,” Kal replied. 

Cap cringed. “I rather you call me Billy. William sounds so… old.”

“Bill, then?” Kal asked.

“Bill is good,” Billy replied.

Marvel prefers his civilian Earth name. 

He probably was raised on Earth too.

So civilian Earth name it is.

“Then call me Clark.”

Bill preferred flying to using the zeta tubes. He had a point. One can never tire of the magnificent view, flying on your power from the space station to earth.

“You keep your key where everyone can see?” Bill’s eyes widened at the large golden key outside Superman’s ice fortress.

“It’s made of dwarf star material and weighs millions of tons,” Clark smirked. “It’s not like anyone can pick it up and let themselves in.” He fitted the massive key into the keyhole.

“I bet I can,” Bill smirked. 

“Kryptonians can,” Clark replied. “But we’re almost extinct.” He handed the key to Marvel, who returned it to its place where it doubled up as an aircraft navigation marker.

“Holy Moley!” Bill’s jaw dropped lower as they walked into the fortress. “Are those your parents?” He pointed up at the statues Kal had created in memory of his birth parents.

“Yes. Jor-el and Lara Lor-Van,” Clark replied. “I was a baby when they sent me away. I don’t remember anything about them.”

“Oh,” Bill squeezed Clark’s shoulder. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“It’s okay.” Clark assured him. “Ma and Pa Kent took me in when I landed on earth as a baby. They raised me as their own son.”

“That’s cool. I don’t have parents. I lost mine when I was five,” Bill’s eyes glistened with tears. 

“I can still remember them, though the memories are getting fuzzy.”He dropped his smile.

“You can always visit me and my family at the farm,” Superman patted his back.

“Farm?” Cap’s eyes widened. “You grew up in a farm?”

“Raised there. My folks live there,” he chuckled as he led Bill through the fortress' many chambers. “Talking about families, there’s a polar bear family I want you to meet.”

He opened a door that led into a natural cave just outside the Fortress of Solitude.

“My neighbours,” Clark gestured at a family of polar bears. 

The father and mother bears nodded at the men and chuffed their greeting.

Bill chuffed back. 

Then he whimpered like a playful bear cub.

Curious cubs approached Cap with their heads up and ears forward.

The biggest baby bear swatted the air in a playful mock attack. 

Captain Marvel pawed back as younger cubs rolled around. 

Their mother walked slowly towards Cap, and sniffed at him. 

The babies followed suit. 

Between the cuffs, whines and whimpers, the bears seemed to be having some sort of conversation with the man.

“Do you understand what they are saying?” Clark walked up to them, getting a growl in response.

“Oh sorry,” Bill replied. “I keep forgetting we aren’t speaking English.”

“Huh?” Clark frowned. Confused.

“Sasha here was telling me about your noisy machines driving their fish away,” Bill added. “She asks you to be a good neighbour and keep the noise down.”

Apparently, the mother bear was Sasha, the father bear was Phil.

“I’m hardly here,” Clark replied.

Bill chuffed at the mother bear, getting a series of growls in return.

“She says, you may not be here, but your machines still make too much noise. These two days, the sounds are more frequent and worse,” Bill explained.

Sasha chuffed some more.

“Then there are the newcomers in shiny suits that came through this week,” translated Bill.

“That’s not possible,” Clark had a nagging feeling something was wrong.

Phil roared. 

Sasha herded the cubs away.

“They are coming again. The bears smell them,” Clark translated for Bill. 

“Sasha is asking you to tell your guests to be more considerate.”

“What guests?” 

A sudden pain stabbed through Clark’s entire body. 

Kryptonite.

He searched for the source, but his super-vision failed him. A wave of dizziness hit him. Hard.

“Are you okay, Clark,” Bill caught him before he hit the ground.

“Kryptonite,” his vision turned blurry as an armoured figure bearing a large chunk of Kryptonite stalked past the bears, towards him.

“I got this.” 

Bill’s voice was the last thing Clark heard before he blacked out.

*

“Batman! Superman’s poisoned!” Captain Marvel strode into the Watchtower carrying a limp, green-faced Superman.

“What happened?” Batman led Marvel to The Infirmary.

“Kryptonite bomb exploded in our faces,” Marvel grimaced. “Shards of Green K pierced his skin. I removed as much as I could but I don’t have X-ray vision, but I think he breathed particles of Kryptonite, so can you check his lungs?”

“Hmmph,” Batman scrutinised Marvel. “Why aren’t you affected?”

“Kryptonite doesn’t bother me,” Marvel replied. “We were attacked in the Arctic. Who do I hand the culprits over to?”

“Bring them here for interrogation,” Batman replied. If these guys infiltrated Superman’s fortress, he wanted to find out more. “Local authorities don’t have the facilities or security to store technology that is advanced enough to take down Superman. Bring everything here for safekeeping.”

“Yes, sir!” Marvel did a chipper salute and disappeared in a red blur.

So, Captain Marvel is immune to Kryptonite. He doesn’t have X-ray vision either. The man is clearly not a Kryptonian.

As he applied the ultrasonic vibratory device to Superman’s chest to loosen the kryptonite particles in his lungs, Batman pondered on the new information that Marvel had revealed about himself.  

Marvel may not be a Kryptonian, but he could be a Daxamite. 

These are descendants of Kryptonians who left Krypton to explore space. They have the same powers as Kryptonians but do not have x-ray vision. 

Although they are not affected by Kryptonite, Daxamites have a fatal sensitivity to lead.

Batman set up the portable lung lavage system to wash out Superman’s lungs. 

Then he headed to his private quarters where he kept his contingencies against every member of the Justice League.

He removed the Kryptonite from Marvel’s box and replaced it with lead bullets. 

[eddieslunchbox]

desire

summary: you've never been kissed and eddie has been crushing on you since the day you met

18+ [bestfriend!eddie x female!reader]

contains: hurt/comfort, mutual pining, fluff, friends to lovers, kissing, brief mention of alcohol, swearing

word count: 4k

a/n: this is my first time writing for eddie and I'm excited to share him with you! this is very self-indulgent but I hope you like it. please consider reblogging/commenting if you do, my blog is brand new! enjoy ❤

There’s a romantic comedy playing on the television, something you picked up from Family Video for your bi-weekly movie night with Eddie. It was your turn to pick, and after sitting through a terrible slasher film he claimed to love, you wanted to get him back with a movie you didn’t necessarily have interest in, but knew would make him squirm in his seat. 

He grabbed the snacks while you got the movie, and you met up at his trailer after Wayne left for work, the sun setting beyond the horizon and leaving a cold autumn breeze in its place. A routine that had been kept for almost six-months straight.

A bowl of popcorn sat between the two of you, an open bag of sour patch kids resting against your thigh and a half-empty bottle of beer was clasped in Eddie’s hand, resting lazily on his knee where he sat on the opposite side of the sofa. 

You always looked forward to these nights, but today you felt particularly resentful about your choice of film, the two main characters falling in love mere days after meeting. It’s cheesy and cliche, and not all that realistic. You know that. But it makes your chest ache with longing for something you’ve never had. 

And now, unbeknownst to you, you’ve been watching the movie play out with a pout sitting on your face while Eddie has to bite back his smile each time the male protagonist kisses the girl that looks a little like you if he squints hard enough. 

The two of you had been best friends since high school and now you were spending most of your time in college while Eddie worked at an auto shop, which left your get-togethers pushed to the weekends unless one of you showed up at the other's place without warning after a long day. You’d also been crushing on him practically since the day you met, but had kept your feelings to yourself, ignorant to the fact that Eddie also had eyes for you for longer than he was willing to admit to himself. 

You’ve watched him go through a handful of relationships in the time you’ve known him. 

From hearing the disbelief in his voice when he scored a date with Chrissy Cunningham and seeing her hanging off of his arm around school for four months, before you all graduated and she broke it off with a voicemail left on Wayne’s home phone and headed off to university in Indianapolis; to random hookups from his evenings spent at The Hideout that you encountered in awkward meetings when you showed up at his trailer to spend the day with him, finding girls in his clothes sipping coffee that they helped themselves to while Eddie snoozed for another hour. 

Eddie has been your best friend for five years. Six in only a couple of months. And he has been with a total of nine different women. 

Not that you’re counting or anything. 

His relationships never bother you. Not really. But the nagging thought in the back of your mind every time you think about him, was that you haven’t been with anyone. 

You’ve had nothing more than a brief conversation with boys in required discussion groups in college. And other than the frequent hugs you receive from Eddie, the furthest you’ve ever gone with someone was a kiss on the cheek from one of your girlfriends that was slightly too close to the corner of your mouth, and left your body erupting in tingles. 

But Eddie had game. He knew how to make a girl swoon. How to wrap them around his finger and kiss them until they were weak in the knees and red in the face.

You had seen him kiss a handful of times and were ashamed to admit to yourself that you had crawled into your bed with your hand between your thighs more than once, wishing it was you he was kissing and touching and making crumble with one particularly smitten look on his face.

He glances at you when you haven't said a word in over an hour, seeing the frown on your face and the crease between your brows that he desperately wants to smooth over with his thumb. You never had a great poker face, unintentionally putting most of your emotions on display, and he knows you have no idea you’re pouting. 

“Did you run out of candy?” He asks suddenly, making you turn to him, the wrinkle in your forehead deepening in confusion. “You’re grumpy.” 

“I’m not grumpy,” you huff, plucking your aforementioned candy off the sofa and popping one into your mouth. 

Your knees are pulled up to your chest, body leaning away from Eddie with your legs resting against the arm of the sofa. He knows something is up when your eyes don’t return to the movie, lips pursing as you suck on the candy in your mouth and stare at the bag in your hands, pretending to read the ingredients. 

He quietly sets his beer down on the coffee table, moving the barely touched popcorn off of the sofa and clicking pause on the remote, filling the room with silence. You look up at him and he rests his arm on the back of the sofa, the palm of his hand pressing into his cheek. 

“Are you going to keep pouting for the rest of the night, or tell me what’s wrong?” He asks, brow arching in question and you fight the urge to roll your eyes. 

“I’m fine,” you mutter, dropping your candy onto the table and bundling your hands together in your lap. 

“You’re a liar, is what you are,” he accuses. 

You sigh, slumping further down into the sofa with your cheek resting on the cushion as you turn to meet his gaze. 

His brown eyes sparkle in the dim light of the room, his usually untamed hair pulled back with a bun at the base of his skull, stray pieces falling softly to frame the sides of his face. He looks pretty. He always does, but your current state of mind has you looking away as your heart skips a beat, gaze falling to his chest which is covered with a well-worn Dio shirt. 

“I want that,” you admit quietly, voice barely audible to yourself. 

“You want what?” He questions, brows furrowing. 

You flicker your eyes over to the television and he turns his head to look at the screen, the film paused on a scene of a girl lounging beside a pool with a fluffy dog in her lap, sipping on a bright purple cocktail. 

“A dog? A pool- or do you want a drink? I can try and make you something but I don’t know what we have…” He trails off in confusion and you sigh, rubbing your hands over your face. 

“Just forget it,” you mumble into your palms before crossing your arms over your stomach and tilting your eyes up to the ceiling. 

Eddie feels clueless as he tries to work out your unspoken desire in his head, gaze shifting around the room until he spots the fictional couple on the cover of the rented VHS tape. 

A lightbulb flicks on in his head. 

“You want someone?” 

Your eyes dart to him quickly enough that he knows he’s right before you give him a subtle nod of your head, pulling the sleeves of your sweater over your hands as you feel your face grow hot. 

“You will one day,” he assures you but you just shake your head, that being the last thing you want to hear. 

Eddie knows about your relationship history, or rather, lack thereof, but you never talk about it. So he’s surprised with your next statement, his heart leaping into his throat and the energy in the room shifting. 

“No one has ever found me attractive… or at least not enough to do something about it. It’s hopeless.” 

He keeps a straight face but curls his fingers into a fist at his side, silently cursing himself for never telling you how pretty you really are. He thinks you’re the prettiest and most attractive person he’s ever known, but has never said a word out of fear that you’ll stop being his best friend. 

“It’s not hopeless,” he says quietly. “The guys who haven’t made a move on you are pussies.” 

His partially self-degrading comment was meant to make you laugh, but you don’t. Not even giving him a pitying laugh or a half-forced smile. 

“No one has ever even glanced in my direction,” you say and he frowns. 

“That you’ve seen.” 

“Eddie…” you sigh, unsure of why you start to feel emotion welling up in your chest. 

"Sorry."

“I just… I grew up surrounded by friends who had boyfriends, or flings, or were flirted with- kissed stupid outside of bars or on the bench behind school. And no one-” your words get caught in your chest and you swallow down the lump forming in your throat. “No one has ever even looked at me. Do you know how that feels?”

You look up at him but he doesn’t reply, his eyebrows threading together as he watches you bare your heart to him like this for the first time. 

“To have guys look at everyone around you, but never you? To never have anyone like you enough to say something about it? To… to have maybe had three guy friends who never saw you as anything more, that you haven’t even spoken to in years?” 

You know he doesn’t get it. Not at all. But it doesn’t matter. 

“God, Eddie.” You scrub at your eyes when tears gloss over your vision. “I’ve never even kissed someone,” your voice cracks and falls into a whisper. 

He immediately reaches forward to wrap his hands around your ankles and pull you towards him, swiftly maneuvering you to sit with your legs thrown over his lap and your head buried in his neck. 

“I’m sorry,” he says quietly, running his hand over your waist. You sniffle sadly. “Fuck, sweetheart, I’m sorry.” 

He knows that all of the potentially comforting words forming in his brain won’t make you feel better. Because he doesn’t understand what it’s like to be your age and never kissed. 

You don’t want to hear that it’ll happen one day. You don’t know what you want. 

Maybe comfort isn’t something that words would necessarily give you right now. 

“I know that it’ll probably happen one day but… what if it doesn’t?” You whimper, curling into him as your vulnerability takes over. He holds you tighter to him, shaking his head. “I don’t even know what it feels like to be wanted. I can’t even imagine anyone wanting me. No one ever has.” 

His heart feels like it’s going to crumble into pieces in his chest as he lets you talk out your feelings, his hand gripping your thigh tightly. You’re almost completely perched in his lap, but he can’t focus on how you feel against him when your tears are wetting the collar of his shirt. 

“God I feel fucking pathetic,” you mumble, wiping your hand over your eyes and sitting up. “Sorry.” 

“You’re not pathetic,” he says, making you scoff quietly as you dab at your cheeks with your sleeves, staring down at your lap. “You’re human. It’s pretty human to want to feel desired.” 

“Yeah,” you whisper, sniffling back the remainder of your tears and lifting your eyes to find his pretty brown ones staring back at you. 

There’s something different in his gaze now. Something you’ve only seen a few times. Something loving and soft, and so sweet that it makes your breath hitch in your throat. 

Eddie figures that now is as good a time as any to potentially make a complete fool out of himself in an attempt to make you feel better. To make you feel like you’re worthy of being desired. Because god knows he’s been desiring you since the day you accidentally fell into his lap in the cafeteria after being shoved out of the way with a harsh shoulder by some prissy cheerleader on the second day of school.

“You’re beautiful,” he says so quietly that you almost don’t hear him. 

“Eddie…” you mumble, shutting your eyes and moving to climb off of his lap. 

His hand on your thigh tightens and you pause, his eyes tracing delicately over your features. 

“You want someone to look at you,” he says, the corners of his lips quivering in a small smile. “So I’m looking, sweetheart.” 

His eyes flicker down to your lips and you want to say something. To pull away and turn the movie back on, get off of his lap and pretend like you were never there in the first place. But the way he’s looking at you is something you’ve only ever seen him do with his past girlfriends or someone he’s crushing on. Never to you. 

Your cheeks feel warm as he looks at you and you can almost feel his eyes as they trace over your hairline and down the bridge of your nose, past your lips and dropping down to your chest before meeting yours again. Your stomach twists with nerves as his hand leaves your thigh to rest on the side of your neck, his thumb smoothing across the skin of your cheek. 

“Eddie,” your voice is a whisper, heart pounding in your chest. “Stop.” 

He can feel the nerves radiating off of you but he doesn’t move, one of his brows quirking up in question. “What’s wrong?” 

“I-I don’t… I-” you stumble for a reason why you want him to stop looking at you like that. 

You wrack your brain while he sits patiently for an answer, but you quickly understand that you don’t want him to stop. You’re just terrified. 

You don’t have to speak to understand what could happen, with how he’s gazing at you and touching you so softly as if you’ll break under his palms at any second. Holding you in a way he never has before. 

“Please don’t be making one of your stupid jokes right now,” you say, a plea that has his face softening and his thumb brushing across your bottom lip. 

“I’m not joking, baby,” he murmurs, the pet name making your heart stammer in your chest. “You’re gorgeous. And I was too afraid to say anything in case you didn’t feel the same and left because you were uncomfortable around me.” 

You suddenly feel like crying again, a wave of disbelief washing over you as you realize that your best friend and the person you’ve been silently wanting for almost six years wants to give you everything you were just begging for. 

“I could never be uncomfortable around you,” you say and he smiles, hooking his arm around your waist and twisting you so that you’re facing him, your knees pressing into the sofa on either side of his hips. 

“I mean it,” he said and all you can do is nod. 

The position you’ve found yourself in is foreign in more ways than one, but especially with it being Eddie who has put you there. You feel slightly overwhelmed with your shorts riding up on your thighs and your skin cold where the metal of the chain on his belt presses against you. Rough denim scratching softly at your legs and a subtle heat radiating through the fabric that makes you slightly dizzy as you get a whiff of his cologne. 

Your hands are clenched into fists around the fabric of his t-shirt and he can feel your heart racing where his palm is still pressing against the side of your neck. 

“It’s just me, yeah?” He says and you swallow the sudden dryness in your throat. “There’s nothing to be scared of.” 

He knows you need him to make all of the moves right now and he’s okay with it, even despite the way his heartbeat is quickening to catch up with yours. 

“Can I kiss you?” 

His question makes your head spin and your stomach tightens. “I… I’ve never-” 

“I know.” The gentle reassurance that falls from his lips soothes you and you give him another quick nod. 

There’s still a hint of a smile on his face when he leans forward to brush his lips against yours.

He doesn’t kiss you right away, the tip of his nose nudging yours as he pulls back just enough to gauge your reaction. Your eyes are closed and your lips part slightly with a shaky sigh, hands unknowingly pulling the neckline of his shirt down to grasp for any semblance of reality as you sit in his lap. 

He slides his hand to the back of your neck, guiding you forward an inch to meet his mouth, lips slotting against yours. His lips are soft and slightly chapped, and when a strand of his hair brushes against your cheek, you don’t bother to pull away even when it tickles your skin. 

The hand on your neck is a grounding touch and you think you’ve never felt so safe and comfortable in Eddie’s arms before.

He can feel the way you relax into his kiss, your body slumping just enough to rest your chest against his and fingers untangling from his shirt to drop into his lap. You’re not breathing so he pulls away after just a few seconds, lips parting from yours with a quiet click and you immediately take a deep breath through your nose, your eyes fluttering open. 

You think if your brain was working properly, you’d be worried that this was all a ploy for him to get your first kiss out of the way so you’d stop crying, but the only thing floating through your mind is how nice it felt to have his lips on yours. 

His face is close to yours, lashes brushing his cheekbones as he sits with his eyes closed, the hand on your waist sliding down to rest on the top of your thigh. The tip of his tongue pokes out as he wets his lips before exhaling a long breath through his nose, a tiny smirk tugging at his mouth. 

“Shit,” he breathes, squeezing your thigh before tipping his head back to rest on the sofa cushion. “I really can’t believe it took me this long to kiss you.” 

“You mean that?” You fight the urge to bring your hand up to feel your lips, wondering how long you might have to wait to feel his again. 

He peels his eyes open and looks down at you. “You have no idea.”

You feel a smile begin to form on your face and you duck your chin to hide against his chest, fingers still trembling from clutching his shirt so tightly as you lift your arms to slink around his neck. He chuckles and curls his arms around you, tilting his head down and burying his nose in your hair. 

“Don’t get all shy on me now, sweetheart,” he says, a shiver running down his spine as you slide your fingers into his hair, loosening the elastic holding it back. 

He doesn’t care about his hair as your nose presses into his neck and your breath warms the skin beneath his shirt. “Did I do alright for your first time?” 

Your face goes flush at his choice of words and he fights back a moan when you press a quick kiss to his neck before lifting your head, unable to hold back the coy grin that sits on your lips. 

You nod and he smiles, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on your lower back. 

“Yeah? Think it’d be okay if I did it again?” 

“Please,” you say and he wastes no time in kissing you again. 

Your hands blindly tug the elastic band out of his hair, sliding it onto your wrist and tangling your fingers into the mess of curls at his neck. His lips drag over yours in lingering kisses that make your stomach twist with heat, tasting a hint of the candy he was munching on earlier in the evening. 

You’re consumed by the new sensation of his lips moving against yours and the frizzy curls hooked around your fingers, the thick of your thighs resting on his own with a silent invitation to scooch your hips a little closer to his if you wanted to. 

Eddie is kissing you. Keeping his advances small but addicting, pushing back a smile each time he feels you chase his lips when he pulls back. You can’t get enough. 

So you don’t really notice when he relaxes back against the sofa, resting his hands on your soft thighs with his fingers dipping just below the edge of your shorts. You let out a quiet noise against his lips as your chest comes to rest on his, your arm getting trapped beneath his shoulder and the cushion. His nails press softly into your skin at how pleased you sound, his arms erupting in goosebumps when you unintentionally tug at his hair. 

You’ve been letting out quiet gasps between every kiss he plants on your mouth, your lungs stinging in your chest, yet reluctant to pull away. It’s only when you feel the tip of his tongue nudge against your bottom lip that you pull back, resting your forehead on his and panting to catch your breath. 

“Too much?” He mumbles, sliding his hands over your skin. 

“Not at all,” you breathe, swallowing hard and letting out a soft laugh. “I just couldn’t breathe.” 

Eddie smiles, tilting his chin forward to press his lips to the corner of your mouth. You lift your head and your eyes instantly fall to his lips, now slightly swollen and a darker shade of pink. 

It’s hard for you to think straight, to wrap your head around the fact that you just had your first kiss, and second, and third, and fourth… all with Eddie who is looking at you now like you hung the moon just for him. 

As much as your insecurity is wanting to take you away from this moment, you know that he isn’t that good of a liar, and if he really didn’t want you like this in at least some capacity, you’d be able to see it in his eyes. But all you can see is the sweet, loving gaze of your best friend as he lets you settle, no matter that all he can think about now is kissing you stupid for the rest of the night. 

You’ve gotten further than you ever thought you’d get and you mindlessly pull the tangles in his hair apart, wetting your lips and taking a deep breath. “I like you, Eds. A lot.” 

You figured he might make a teasing comment at your admission, but he just smirks and lets his eyes fall closed as you play with his hair. “I like you too, sweetheart. Have for way too long.” 

You sink your teeth into your bottom lip and slide your hands from his hair to drag down his chest, his stomach twitching beneath your innocent touch. 

“Do you want to keep watching your movie?” He asks, glancing at you and you shake your head. “You sure?” 

You think this is the happiest you’ve ever been, and Eddie feels the same- just happy that he could be the one to make you feel truly wanted for the first time. He wishes you would’ve confided in him about your lack of romance earlier in your friendship so you wouldn’t have missed out on so many years silently pining for one another. But he thinks this will do just fine.

“I want to keep doing this,” you quietly admit and he lets out a soft groan as he brings his hands up to his face. 

“You’re gonna be the death of me…” He drops his hands to his sides. “Wanna get comfy in my room then?”

He chuckles at your eager nod, patting your thighs and moving to sit up. “Hop up then, baby. We can clean up later.” 

You get up and he follows suit, grabbing your hand and interlacing your fingers to drag you down the hallway with an urgency that makes you laugh the entire way into his bedroom.

[a-spes]

| DEVIOUS LIES — Part three (8.929 words).

| Summary — Anon Request — When your friend asked you out for a drink, you didn't think much about it. Yet, maybe you should've, because that night ruined your life. It may have been two years since the events, but you still can't stop think about what you've lost. Your job, your friends, your lover, and even your mind was left in that motel room.

“I am a hero,” you whispered in your breath, “and that’s what heroes do,” you added, repeating the sentence once more. You were trying to find a little bravery in this mantra, the one you needed to push your limits a little further.  Yet, all you find in these words is deep despair, because a part of you knows that they are not true — and you are not a hero. Not anymore. You tried to believe Fury’s lies. You wanted to believe them, and deceive yourself because it gave you a bit of hope, a reason to carry on, but the illusion couldn’t last for eternity. What’s a hero when they are hated by the whole world? A villain.

| Tags & warnings — Avenger!Natasha Romanoff x Avenger!Reader, Wanda Maximoff x Reader (platonic), Other Avengers x R. Angst with comfort, mental health issues, suicidal ideations, self depreciation, mentions of SA&SH, manipulation, severe injuries, no happy ending.

| Author's notes — This is the last part of the "Devious Lies" serie, and I really hope you all enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it <3

| MOODBOARD — ✧ — MASTERLIST — ✧ — TO SAY SOMETHING

| Part one. Part two. Part three. the scars in our hearts (bonus part).

Many people would say that you are not a hero, not anymore. You have lost this title years ago, the day you revealed your true face to the world by cheating on Natasha —; how could they trust someone with their lives when that person can’t even remain loyal to their girlfriend? A hero is not a human, it is a perfect being that exists for the sole purpose of saving the world, and making children dream. You exist only to give hope to the population, but there is none once they discover that you are just like any of them, someone full of flaws, and failures, just a mess —; just human. 

Who knows the horrible things you might have done in the past, or the numerous lies you could have said to twist the reality? Not them, because they know nothing of the truth behind your departure, but they were still convinced that you were a monster who had been lying to them all this time, and it was too late to undo their hatred. A few days had been enough for rumours to spread, suddenly everyone had a story to share that proves how wicked you were. These stories have slowly replaced those of your greatest achievements, the many times you saved the world now forgotten in favor of all the little things you did wrong.

And you know these stories by heart because you have read about them in newspapers, heard them on television and in cafés. Wherever you go, these rumors follow you, they stick to your skin like an obsessive ex that won’t let you go, even after several years. The people never forget, nor they forgive.

Yet, none of them had the courage to hate you to your face. No, it was always behind your back, a bunch of glances they thought were discreet and whispers as soon as you turned around. You might not be their hero anymore, but you haven’t lost your abilities, and they are aware that you could easily kill any of them in less than a minute. But, instead of letting the anger consumes you, you pretended to not see the fear in their eyes, mixed with hatred. Except that, the longer this situation lasted, the more difficult it became for you to ignore their hostility. You would lie if you said it didn’t bother you to see these emotions replace the admiration that used to sparkle in their eyes.

If you are being honest, you have thought about it, about killing some of them. These thoughts come to your mind more times that you care to admit —; it would be so easy to snap their necks so you will never hear their hateful whispers again.

What do you have to lose anyway?

Nothing you haven’t already. At worst, they will send you in prison, but to your exhausted mind the idea sounded more tempting than repellent. Sometimes, you think about it as a sweet dream, and it brings you some peace —; if you were in prison, you would be blessed with ignorance. If you were in prison, they would have a real reason to use these slurs. If you were in prison, you would eventually be where you deserve to be. But, no matter how many times you thought about it, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it and so, instead, you shut yourself away in your crappy apartment, where you could no longer harm anyone.

—   —   — 

“But you are still a hero,” the man told you. It was months ago, almost a year, and it was the first time you had seen Fury since the events that led you to take a break. 

A break that was coming to an end, and that you were desperately trying to prolong. Unfortunately, the man is as stubborn as you are, and he is determined to convince you to return to the field. He needs you, and that is obvious, even though those words haven’t crossed his lips. You can feel his desperation. 

You disagree with him. 

You are not a hero, and he definitely doesn’t need you. There are dozens of agents more talented than you are, dozens of promising, and less controversial, souls who deserve a chance. He should better abandon you now, and let you rot in your apartment, because he will be disappointed sooner or later. But you didn’t tell him that. Instead, you stayed quiet, because the words were stuck in your throat.

“Don’t tell me that you are that kind of agent?” he asked, to fill the silence. The tone of his voice had changed slightly. There was something petty about it, something that is crawling under your skin —; it is the disappointment that his words carry. Yet, you have no idea what he is talking about —; “that kind of agent”? The worlds held no meaning to you, but you could still feel that they didn’t bode well, and that you didn’t want to be that kind of agent. You can see his eyebrows rise in anticipation of an answer you can’t give him.

“What kind?” you asked back, without any conviction, just because you know that is what he expects. You accompany these words with a sigh.

You are not in the mood for this kind of game. You only want one thing, and it is to go back to your apartment, to slip back into the comfort of your sheets and stay there for days to come. In fact, you may never leave them ever again. That is the only place where you can ignore the world, where all your worries disappear along with the rest. The only place where you do not need to be human, or pretend to be strong, where you can be a mess, and no one would be here to judge.

You were really not comfortable at the idea of coming here, to Fury’s office, at the S.H.I.E.L.D. 's headquarters, and being there makes the feeling even worse. He promised you that no one would know, but how could he be sure? The mere thought that one of them could see you there makes you nervous, and prevents you from concentrating.

What if it happens?

What if, despite Fury’s promises, you run into one of them?

You have no idea what you might tell them if it happens. Is it better to beg for their forgiveness, or would it be too much? You bet they wouldn’t even listen to you, anyway —; they haven’t in the past, why would it be different a year later?

Maybe they won’t even acknowledge you, and you should probably do the same —; but wouldn’t it be worse? You are not sure that you could handle this possibility, that you could walk by the people that once were your family as if they were complete strangers.

Maybe it is better if they decide to scream —; that is what a part of you is craving for, no matter how twisted it can be. Because, if they scream, if they still hate you, it means that they care, right? No one would take some of their time and energy to yell at someone they don’t care about, right? Because it wouldn’t make sense.

“The kind that does it for fame,” he replied, and you could feel the weight of his gaze. It was so intense that it made you want to disappear. You hate it, the way he looks at you, as if he knows all the secrets of your soul, and so you are fidgeting in your seat, unable to stay still because of your nerves.  

“No, I am not,” you sighed the words that you knew the man was expecting you to say, falling right into his trap. You are conscious of it, but you are too exhausted to fight, and it is way much easier to give the man what he wants.

Yet, your voice is full of uncertainty —; does it make you a bad person to want to stop helping people? At least, that is what he seems to be suggesting, and maybe he is not wrong. Maybe the only reason you want to stop is because you are selfish —; anyone with your skills wouldn’t hesitate to save the world. But not you, not anymore. Why? When did you become one of the bad guys, one of those who don’t care about others?

You want to tell him — to yell at him — that it is not about lost celebrity, that it was about being hated by almost every soul living on earth, but the words get stuck in your throat —; what’s the difference, after all? Are you really gonna let people die because they do not like you, is that the kind of person you became? No, it is not, and it will never be.

“Does that mean I can count on you?” he asked, and you answered with a murmured yes, because that is what he wants to hear, and because you only want this conversation to end. From the very moment you sat on this chair, you have been eyeing the exit, and you are more than willing to give the man what he wants in exchange for the right to leave.

—   —   —

“I am a hero,” you whispered in your breath, “and that’s what heroes do,” you added, repeating the sentence once more. You were trying to find a little bravery in this mantra, the one you needed to push your limits a little further. 

Yet, all you find in these words is deep despair, because a part of you knows that they are not true — and you are not a hero. Not anymore. You tried to believe Fury’s lies. You wanted to believe them, and deceive yourself because it gave you a bit of hope, a reason to carry on, but the illusion couldn’t last for eternity.

What’s a hero when they are hated by the whole world? A villain. It has been several years since you lost the title of hero. It is not about your great successes anymore, it is about all the mistakes you have ever made, the ones that make you detestable in the public’s eyes. Now, you are just an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., and a controversial one at that. You are the rotten apple that the direction doesn’t really know what to do with. They might desperately need you — or, more accurately, your skills — but they do not want the world to discover that they didn’t fire you despite what they had announced to ease the minds.

Nevertheless, you had agreed to pretend, and to play Fury’s little games, because you didn’t know what else to do. You have been a little lost since you left the team, and the missions you were regularly sent on were a good distraction, but it has been months now, and you do not have the energy to pretend anymore.

Once this mission is over, the first thing you are going to do is to tell the man that it is over, you are quitting — yeah, you are going to leave the agency, and start a new life. The idea sounds appealing, and warms you heart with an emotion you thought you had forgotten; a will to live. You have waited long enough. You are not sure what you are going to do yet, but you know that it will be better — anything would be better than your current life. It will be a second chance, and a real one this time. Maybe you will change your name, and your face, and so you could be anyone you want to be — someone that no one hates. 

But, for now, the only thing you want is some rest. Slowly, your limbs become numb and, soon enough, you are not able to walk anymore, the ground disappears beneath your feet and you collapse into the snow, your legs unable to support the weight of your body. 

Maybe that is your second chance, you thought. Maybe the afterlife will be gentle.

It is so tempting to just close your eyes, to let the cold soothe your pain, and take all your worries away. You don’t know how long you have been walking, wandering around, waiting for help that may never come — probably for days. Days that seemed like an eternity. You were trapped in a landscape that you would surely have found magnificent, had the circumstances of your presence here been different.

The snow falling from the sky covers everything, and not an ounce of greenery escapes it. Yet, the sight wasn’t comforting — it was threatening, and scary. It was so cold that you couldn’t feel your fingertips. Everything was white, and all looked the same, turning the forest into a maze with no way out. The trees rose up, mocking and oppressive, as if they were only waiting for the moment you would give up.

Be patient. It will be soon, you thought, as your body hit the ground in silence.

You hardly notice you’ve fallen. You don’t even have the strength to try and get up, but maybe you don’t want to. The snow forms a gentle embrace, and you feel it begin to cover you in white too. Soon, you are going to disappear, and you’ll become a part of the landscape — How is it going to take, for nature to hide your body, to make it seem like you have never been here? A few hours? And how long would it take for them to find you? Probably more time. Who is “them”, anyway? You are not sure someone is coming from you, and despite your hopes, it is more likely that they won’t come. Did you forget that you have no one? If people do not care enough to show up at your funerals, do you really think that they would go to the trouble of looking for you in the middle of nowhere? What an idiot you are, you should know, by now, that there is no hope.

No one is coming. 

Even though the idea might sound sad, it brings a small smile to your face, as well as a weird sense of comfort — The peace you’ve been looking for is eventually within your reach. Soon, the world is going to forget your name, and your story. Maybe they won’t even know that you died here, alone in the woods, where no one can find your body.

You have tried to warn them about the situation. A last desperate plea for help to be sent, but you never found out if they got your message because your broken radio had died before they could confirm. Despite being an experienced agent, you have been caught out of guard by the situation — Should you wait for them here, or should you try to find a way back home on your own? The decision was made for you when the enemies started looking for you, there was no way you could escape them by staying in their base. Outside, you could hide more easily, and maybe even find a way out of here.

Yet, the days went by, and all you have done is get lost in the forest, a labyrinth made deadly by the snow and very low temperatures. There is no room for life in this place, and the fact that you survived for a few days is a miracle in itself.

You were perfectly aware of the risks when you accepted the mission. There are always high risks in this profession, and you were prepared to take them all, even the most irrational ones because nothing scared you — That’s your strength, you’ve never shied away from a mission. You knew that it wouldn’t go on forever, and that the risks you were taking would eventually lead to your demise — But who cares? Not you, nor Fury. Maybe it was exactly what you were both looking for-; the man wanted a soldier, and you wanted a way to die with dignity, which is exactly what he offered you.

And so, you accepted every mission he presented to you, worked on every file that was put on your desk without thinking twice about it. There was always a good reason to accept, many lives to save, and countless threats to the world, and for that, you were willing to take the risks that nobody else wanted to take. That’s what heroes do, right? They put their lives in line, for the sake of the population. 

So far, you have done surprisingly well, successfully returning from each of your missions. Yet, you knew it was only a matter of time before you ran out of luck. Maybe your current situation is solely your fault, for thinking that you could keep pushing your limits indefinitely — For forgetting that you are not a hero, only human. The blood between your fingers is there to remind you of that. It is red, as the one of all the people who live on this planet, and you can pretend all you like that you are a hero, but you’ll never be able to escape your condition, that of being human.

Yet, there is something oddly comforting in watching your blood staining the snow. Something that cradles you until your eyes close, something that helps you accept your destiny. These bloodstains are the silent promise that peace will soon arrive, the peace you have waited patiently for for years.

—   —   —

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” the woman screamed, her voice echoing throughout the room. No one dared looking at her, everyone avoiding her gaze. The team had just returned from yet another search mission, one of their last hopes of finding you, only to inform her that they had lost track of you — Again. 

The woman knows that she should not have listened to Clint when he told her that she’d better stay in the Quinjet and rest, something she has clearly been lacking in recent days. He even promised her that he would do his best. They all promised, but it was just lies. 

Natasha has waited for them for hours, obviously unable to rest because she was so consumed with anxiety. She had walked the whole length of the Quinjet more times than she can count, waiting for their return. When they came back empty-handed, she was furious. Not only they didn’t find you, but above all they had lost the only hint of your presence that they had managed to find since the search began, almost a week ago.

If she had been with them, things would have been different. She would have found you, she is sure of it — because she would have refused to come back before that happened.

Everything now seemed hopeless, and everyone was aware of this. That probably explains why they are abiding her gaze, not to escape her anger, but because they do not want to witness the pain they could read in her eyes. The spy had always been good at hiding her emotions, and no one had ever been able to read her — even after you left, two years ago, she remained composed — but her mask had started to crack in the last few days, and everyone could now see her worries. 

Natasha was the one who insisted for the Avengers to come for you, and although she insists that this decision is only motivated by her duty, everyone knows there is more to it than that — Feelings that the years had not erased, strong ones that she had buried, but which were resurfacing since she learned that you were in danger. You are her weakness, you are the only one that can make her lose her temper that easily, it is as if she was suddenly a child again — One with emotions too big for his understanding. It is like two years ago, when she saw the pictures and felt her heart being shattered.

“It is okay, I am sure that we are going to find her,” a voice raised, and it was Fury’s. The man was the only one to be brave enough to do such a thing, the only one who didn’t fear the redhead, even though he was the one who should be most wary. The man is standing on the opposite side of the room, leaning nonchalantly against the wall, his arms crossed — They could have been talking about their next meal, and he would have had the same fucking attitude, she thought. “She is strong, and smart. I am sure she will find a way to survive, do not underestimate her, Romanoff,” he calmly added, but his disastrous attempt to calm the atmosphere has the opposite effect — All she wanted to do was to violently rip the expression on his face, she couldn’t stand the overconfidence she could read on it, and the calmness that didn’t fit with the seriousness of the situation. 

“You know nothing,” she replied through gritted teeth, the only way she had found to not scream at him, “you are just trying to make yourself feel better about what’s happening because it is your fault. One of your agents is going to die, and it is all your fault!” she yelled the last sentence, unable to keep her voice low as she felt the rage building inside her. The man didn’t even care, he sees you as an asset, not as a human.

“She is an agent, Romanoff, and one of the best. It is her job to take risks, and she knew them before accepting the mission. This regrettable accident is no one’s fault,” he said, unimpressed by the redhead’s outburst.

“Oh, please!” she exclaimed with a bitter laugh, “this mission wasn’t risky, it was suicidal, and you are perfectly aware of that. No one in their right mind would have accepted it, but she was vulnerable, and you knew it, and took advantage of her state to get what you wanted!” she had moved closer, until she was almost spitting in his face, until the accusing finger she was pointing at him almost touched his chest. She knows the man and his tricks, she knows that he always finds a way to get what he wants. “I hope it was worth it because, if we don’t find her alive, I’ll make sure to bury you next to her grave,” she spitted, not even trying to hide her threat — No, not a threat. It was more than that, it was a promise. 

Those are the last words she said before leaving the Quinjet.

They have been looking for you for days, and everyone is painfully aware that the chances of finding you are diminishing with every passing minute. Yet, the woman is not ready to stop, not until she has hugged you one last time, dead or alive. Looking for you was no easy task, and every clue they have found eventually led to a dead end — You are too skilled for your own good, she thought, and it was almost frustrating. If it wasn’t for your skills, and your ability to disappear without leaving a trace, they would have found you days ago. If it wasn’t for your skills, Fury would have never sent you on this mission alone, and he definitely wouldn’t have waited for so long before sending a rescue team.

The woman had to beg him, to scream, for him to accept to give in some pieces of information about how you were doing. He said that you were fine. He said that you were fine, but it was just a lie. He looked at her, promising that nothing would happen to you, but he only said that to get her out of his office. As she later learned, the man had no idea of how you were doing because it was a no-contact mission, and if you gave them news, it would only be to share bad ones.

She heard the message you sent, a plea for help playing on a loop in her mind. Despite the poor quality of the transmission, and the cut words that prevented them from understanding your situation clearly, she could feel your fear, one that made her blood run cold — The woman has never heard you being so scared before.

Fury has waited two days before sharing the message with her. He said that he was positive you would find a way out on your own, and it would be too risky to send a team there when they had no idea how the situation was, but she hadn’t listened to him. All the woman could see was how he almost ruined every chance to rescue you for some ego problems, and foolish confidence — Everyone knows that after two days the chances of finding a missing person alive are slim. 

She hates him for that. She hates him for allowing you to die.

Or maybe it is herself that she hates, for letting you down years ago, when you needed her the most — If she hadn't, none of that would have happened, you wouldn’t have taken such risks in the hope of achieving some kind of redemption.

“What do you want?” she asked curtly to the person that was following her. She didn’t need to turn around to know who it was — Steve. In recent years, the man had developed the bad habit of following her wherever she went, convinced that she needed him.

“You forgot that,” he said, and she looked over her shoulder at the jacket in his hands. A wry smile appeared on her lips at the sight of the garment.

“Because I don’t need it,” she sighed, her tone as cold as the forest because of how exasperated she was by the way the man was trying to play hero. Maybe he was one for the rest of the world, but the woman definitely didn’t need to be saved, and especially not by a man that is convinced he knows everything better than everyone else.

“And, how exactly, do you expect to be able to help her if you are freezing to death?” He asked, trying to coax her into taking the jacket — But only someone who doesn’t know her well could imagine having any chance of convincing the woman.

“Did you forget where I am from, Roger?” She asked back, stopping in her tracks to face him, the sudden act surprising the man who almost ran into her, “If you are cold, then you can go back to the jet. No one asked you to follow me. So now, shut up or leave me alone,” she warned him before resuming her journey, the man at her heels. Natasha wasn’t walking in the forest for pleasure, and she couldn’t afford any distraction.

The woman has to concentrate to make sure she doesn’t miss any traces of your presence. These are rare, almost imperceptible, and easily hidden by the snow. She needs to be sure that she won’t miss anything, and that is something she can’t do if the centenarian doesn’t stop rambling in her ears.

Fortunately, the message seems to have got through because not a word was spoken for the next hours, and the two Avengers just walked in silence. Only the snow crunching under their feet broke the heavy silence. It had been hours, and the landscape didn’t seem to change, giving the impression that they were walking in place, or that they were going in circles. No matter where her eyes landed, all she could see were snow-covered trees, but that was until she spotted it. It was almost invisible, but there was no way she was going to miss the only thing that wasn’t white in the landscape — A red stop. A spot of blood, probably caused by a few drops, but that was leading to a trail staining the forest’s perfect white coat.

“Wait! Where are you going?” the man exclaimed when he noticed that his partner had run off, but he got no answer. His eyes weren’t as sharp as hers, and so he didn’t notice the stains straight away.

When he finally catches up with the woman, he was so taken aback by the scene that he was unable to move, or speak. It was so unexpected that he felt like he was daydreaming, and wondered if it wasn’t the cold that was causing him to hallucinate.

There, a few meters away from him, the redhead was kneeling in the snow. She was close to a body whose identity was in no doubt — You. Suddenly, all he can see is the rigidity of your body, the bluish tint of your lips, the snow that is covering your face, but above all the scarlet puddle that is staining the snow, so big that no one could miss it.

“Give me the jacket,” she asked him, her tone firm despite the obvious tremor in her voice. Her eyes never leave you, even for a moment, perhaps because she was afraid that you would disappear, and that she would lose you, again. “Steve. The jacket,” she asked again, but more urgently this time, “give me the fucking jacket, and go get the others!” she repeated, and the shout seems to shake the man out of his torpor because he eventually hands her the jacket before running off, in the direction of the jet. 

Natasha didn’t look back, but she heard his footsteps in the snow as he walked away. Now alone, she gently lifts your body, wrapping you in the jacket, and even pulling the hood down your face to protect you from the snow and wind. She can’t help but let her hands linger on your visage, her thumb gently tracing your features, then brushing past your now blue lips to eventually follow the wound on your cheek.

For a few seconds, she allows herself to get lost in the familiarity of your face, but the blood that is left on her thumb after she ran it over your cheek brings her back to reality — You are dying. Maybe you already are, dead. Yet, there is not much she can do before the arrival of the rest of the team, except praying to all the gods whose names she knows, even though she has never believed in them — Please, if you exist, it is the moment to do something good, she thought, and the woman was so deep in her thoughts, trying to keep the last shred of sanity she had, because the last thing you need is for her to lose her temper, that she missed it at first, those words that came out of your mouth.

“What?” she asked, a little abruptly, as her eyes fell on your face. Your expression hadn’t changed, your eyes were still closed, and so were your lips, giving the impression that she had imagined the whisper. “Did you say something?” She nevertheless asked, and several seconds passed in silence. She felt the hope that had made her heart beat being replaced by despair, until she notices the trembling of your lips as they try to come to life. At first, no sound escapes, only a whimper that breaks her heart. “Shh, it is okay, take your time, baby. You can do it,” she quietly encouraged you as she noticed your struggles. 

Her hands cup your face, and the warmth of the contact, accompanied by the circles her thumbs are tracing on your cheeks, is comforting. It helps you to ignore the pain for a moment. The gesture even gave you the strength to talk.

“You..,” you started, but this simple word requires so much effort that you need to catch your breath before continuing. “ ..came..,” you eventually added, the second word coming out as a broken whisper, and the woman has to be close if she wants to understand what you are saying.

“Yes!” She exclaimed, “yes, I did. W- We are all here, baby,” she softly replied, her voice trembling slightly because of emotion, just like her hands as she continued cradling your face. 

They are here? All of them? You thought, and the realization brings tears to your eyes. The woman can also feel tears welling up in her eyes, and you can see them. Yet, she should not cry. She has no right to cry when you need her to be strong and calm your fears. The woman knows it and yet, she can’t stop the tears from rolling down her cheeks. For so long, she had hoped to see you again, prayed for a second chance even though she knew she didn’t deserve it, but she hadn’t imagined that life could be cruel enough to offer her what she most wanted under the worst circumstances — Once again, she was about to lose the most important person in her life.

“Is.. that.. end.. ?” You painfully asked the woman. 

You have once heard a belief saying that the Angel in charge of helping a soul to travel to the other side always takes the appearance of the person the deceased loved the most during their life. You wouldn’t have expected anyone but the redhead to be yours. You may have tried to hate her for years, but the truth is that you have been unable to stop loving the woman.

“Because..,” you continued, but were stopped by a violent coughing fit. “Am.. ready.. now..,” you eventually managed to say. You want nothing more than to touch her face one last time, but your body refuses to listen to your desire and, as you try to move your hand, all you manage to do is to wiggle your fingertips — But it is okay, you thought. You are content enough with being able to see her one last time, and knowing that her comforting touch is the last thing you would feel before Death wraps its arms around your body, taking you somewhere where pain does not exist. 

“The.. end?” The woman repeated after you, a bit confused at your words, and you can tell because of how her eyebrows are knitted together. “Oh no, honey, it is not,” she whispered, trying to bring you a bit of comfort. “You are going to be fine, I promise,” she said, repeating those words a few times, unsure if they are really meant for you.

“I.. know.., I.. believe.. you..,” you whispered back.

“Then stay with me, baby, okay? Keep your eyes open for me, please. Just a few more minutes, and then everything will be fine, I promise. Do you think you can do that for me?” She started rambling when she noticed that you were struggling to keep your eyes open. Yet, it doesn’t seem to work as she watches you slowly slip into unconsciousness. “Tell me, love, where does it hurt? Could you do that for me?” She attempted, hoping that the question would be enough to ground you, to keep you here, with her, until the others arrive.

“Everywhere..,” you whispered, and it was the last thing you said. You were in so much pain that your whole body was numb, and you could barely feel something, unable to tell the difference between your arms and legs.

You are not sure what happened next, or how long it was before the rest of the team arrived, because despite Natasha’s attempts to encourage you to stay awake, you ended up losing consciousness. The last thing you were aware of was the sound of a vehicle, along with a few words that were yelled, and even if you couldn’t understand what they were saying, you were able to grasp the urgency in their tones. The last thing you remember was being lifted. That is when you knew you could do, before the arms that were carrying you were comforting, they were the promise that everything would be fine now.

After all, she promised. Didn’t she?

—   —   —

It was all a lie, when she promised that things would be okay now.

Since the very moment you have opened your eyes, after a few days spent in a coma, the world has been nothing but pain. She had promised you a world where suffering doesn’t exist, but had given you the exact opposite, every day being worse than the one that preceded it. Your wounds won’t heal, and despite the weeks that had passed, you were unable to walk properly, or anything without help. Every step you make, every breath you take, are the reminders of what was taken from you.

You had wished for Death. You had waited for the moment you could leave this world almost impatiently, but when the time eventually came, you were brutally ripped from Its arms. When the woman wrapped her arms around you, wrapping you in a comforting embrace, whispering the promise that everything would be fine now, you naively believed her. It is not before it was too late that you realized your mistake. You have thought that the woman you saw was your angel, but it has only been Natasha, a human, with her flaws and mysteries.

Why did she even decide to come?

The question has not left your mind since you opened your eyes. It raises a feeling of confusion, and anger, because there is no explanation you could think of that would make a bit of sense.

You have not talked since they brought you there, at the compound. It is a place that you’ve never thought you would ever see again, but mostly a place you never wanted to return to. At first, they thought that you just needed a bit of time to adapt, but the days soon became weeks, and you remained locked in your silence despite their many attempts to encourage you to say a few words. The only sounds they have heard coming from you are the whimpers of pain that sometimes fall past your lips.

Natasha has tried to speak to you, but you would always ignore her questions and ramblings. Yet, it has never stopped her from trying. Even though she is not sure that you can hear her, even though whenever she enters your room, she finds you looking out of the window, staring blankly. The woman had stopped closing the shutters a while ago, so you would always have something to look at, but you probably didn’t even notice the difference. It seems that your mind is somewhere else, somewhere she can’t reach.

You are far from here, from this room you hate with your whole heart but that you can’t leave despite your desires. A room that is not yours, and certainly not home despite what they may say, and you would rather be anywhere else, even if it means locking yourself in your thoughts. 

It is something they would have known if they had asked you, but apparently they didn’t think to ask for your opinion when deciding your future. The Avengers Tower is quiet, and comfortable. Somewhere you are familiar with, and where you would be able to get the care you need — The perfect place. The only place. You have no family, no friends, that could have agreed to take care of you until you are back on your feet. The Avengers may not be your family anymore, but they are the only ones who have agreed to bear this responsibility — Or most likely they felt like they had to. You probably want to be here as much as they want you to be there, and you know that they are silently praying that you will go away soon. You are the constant reminder of what they want to forget.

And so, you have slowly found comfort in your own mind. The only place where they can’t bother you, where suffering and time does not exist. Except that, as the days go by, it gets harder to ignore the woman. She is the only one who has never given up, always trying to talk to you when she comes to your room, even though you have never replied once. Whenever she comes to bring your meal, or your medicine, or help you to change, she would stay a bit longer, rambling about anything that comes to her mind — And you hate it. You don’t care about her last mission, nor do you care about the last movie she has seen. 

When she is here, time seems to flow slowly, minutes becoming a painful eternity. You wish the woman would understand your silence as the sign that you don’t want to talk, but it is apparently not a sufficient clue because she has never stopped talking.

The last thing you want is to get out of your caparace, because you don’t want to see what is outside, but it becomes almost impossible to ignore the world when the woman keeps invading your bubble. Her voice, her soft touches,.. they held a new promise — Everything will be fine, she continues saying, but now you know it is not true. You have fallen for her lies one time, and promised to yourself that you wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. These touches didn’t bring you any comfort, only frustration which then turned into anger. You have felt it boiling inside you for days now — Until you couldn’t bear it any more.

“Why?” You whispered. The woman was helping you to put on clean pyjamas, and you think she was rambling about her day when you cut her off with your question.

You are not sure why you have decided to talk that day. You are not even sure that it was your decision, the broken whisper falling past your lips before you could realize what was happening. You wish you could take back your word, but it was too late. The woman was as surprised as you were, judging by the expression on her face. Her lips are moving, but it is her turn to be at a loss of words.

Somehow, the hesitation you could read on her face made yours disappear instantaneously. Suddenly, you didn’t want to stay silent anymore. You wanted to be heard, to get the anger out of your body because you couldn’t bear the weight of it anymore.

“Why?!” You repeated, but this time you yelled the question. At least, it was the intention, but after so much time without talking, the word was nothing like a scream, only a strangled cry. Yet, despite your voice being weak, you realized that you didn’t want to stay quiet anymore — Not now, when you just got it back. Not when there are so many things you want to say, to scream in their faces.

“Why what?” She softly asked, stopping what she was doing for a second. Her hands were resting on your knees as she was talking. You were sitting on the edge of the bed, and had to lower your head a little to meet her eyes. Yet, she doesn’t dare to hold your gaze for more than a few seconds.

You scoff when she looks away, doing the same thing as you can feel tears coming in your eyes. She must not see them. “Playing games, are we?” You said back. Your tone is venomous, your words rude, and meant to hurt the woman, even though she took care of you the past few weeks.

It may sound unfair to treat the woman after all she has done for you — After she saved your life. Yet, she is still the one who dumped you years ago, the one who broke your heart, ruined your life, and made promises she couldn’t keep. The truth is that, if you can’t handle her presence, it is because you know that you don’t want her to be really gone — You shouldn’t, but you want more of it, more of her and her reassuring presence. Her sudden gentleness, after she pushed you away so violently, is building your hopes back up. A feeling that is painful when you know that they would never become a reality.

“Listen,.. I-,” she sighed, but before she could find the right words to answer your questions, you cut her, again. You already had enough, wanting this conversation to end, and now.

“If you can’t give me an honest answer, then I don’t want to listen to you,” you abruptly said, warning the woman that she should carefully choose her next words.

The woman may want to say something, but when she opens her lips, no sound comes out — Because she has no idea what to say. The truth is that Natasha is as confused as you are, the same unanswered questions occupying her mind. She doesn’t know why she went after you, and the lack of response keeps her awake at night. 

The woman simply knew that she needed to be there, that her place was by your side, and no word was strong enough to describe how worried she had been about you all this time, a feeling that has lingered inside her since you left. She pretended not to care, tried to bury these feelings as she had been raised to do, but it never really left.

You had poisoned her soul, her heart.

But you know. You already know the answers to your questions, you only asked because you wanted to hear them from her mouth. You want her to admit that her actions were only guided by her guilt, not by the love she pretends to bear for you, because that is the only way you would be able to get rid of the painful hope that, maybe, things could go back to the way they used to be.

But obviously she wouldn’t say that. 

The great Natasha Romanoff would never admit that she is selfish, and imperfect. 

That she is far from the hero everyone thinks she is.

“Get. out,” you eventually asked the woman. She has hesitated, and missed her chance to say something. “GET OUT,” you yelled when you noticed she was about to protest, “LEAVE ME ALONE,” you added, pushing the woman who was kneeling in front of you with all your strength. When she didn’t budge, it only added to your distress.

For once, she listened to you, and left the room. The door closed behind her with a soft thud, and just like that you found yourself plunged into the silence you’ve been longing for — Yet, it didn’t feel as comforting as you expected it to be.

Somehow, since that day, you have only felt worse. Since you have found your voice again, you only used it to express your anger, yelling at anyone trying to get into your room. It has been several days now, that your cries have been echoing in the tower, making it clear that you wanted to be left alone. If the past few weeks you have been bearing Natasha’s presence, it wasn’t the case anymore, and now the woman couldn’t even do something as simple as knocking at your door without you screaming. You do not want to see, hear, or feel her — Even the mere thought of the redhead was too much.

All of them had tried to step in your room, convinced they would be the one able to calm you down, but everything they achieved was to worsen the situation. Eventually, they stopped coming, giving you the loneliness you thought you wanted — Then why are not feeling better, now that you have what you asked for? 

You are torn apart by contradictory feelings and needs, unable to quite understand what is going on in your mind — It is obvious that you don’t want to see Natasha. And yet, everytime someone other than the woman opened this door, you felt disappointment filling your heart. Maybe that is why you yelled, why you were so angry. 

When they eventually stopped knocking at your door, you caught yourself hoping for them to come back. Your days are now an endless succession of hopes, built up at every sound of footsteps in the corridor, and disappointments, when you eventually hear them going away. She has proven you right, you thought. She has proven to you that she doesn’t care, and you have used up all your tears crying over this idea, days and nights. 

You wish you hadn’t said those things, that you hadn’t screamed at the woman, because you were now missing her presence. Her gentleness may have been annoying, but it has been so long since the last time someone has been this gentle with you, that now it was gone, you were craving to get it back. She gave you a second chance, and you have thrown it away for what? Nothing.

It took a few days before you eventually decided to leave your room. It was not by choice, obviously, and you only agreed to leave the comfort of your bed because of the hunger that was slowly gnawing at your insides. The last meal you got was the same day as the last time you saw Natasha, and you knew you couldn’t go much longer without eating. At first, you told yourself you would endure the pain, that you deserved it for what you did to the woman, but it didn’t make it more bearable, and you eventually gave in.

The plan you made in your mind was easy — Waiting for the night to come, make sure that no one is awake, and then quickly getting down to the kitchen. Only a few minutes, only time to grab some snacks before making it back to the comfort of your room. Yet, you should have known that things never go as they are meant to.

The journey to the kitchen was everything but easy. You have probably been a bit too optimistic about your ability to walk when you thought about your plan. The pain in your leg was so intense that you were only able to take a few steps before collapsing, and had to almost drag yourself down there. Every step felt like running miles, leaving you short of breath. And yet, despite all your efforts, despite your strong will, you were eventually forced to give up when your legs have once again shifted under your weight, leaving you on the ground, unable to get up despite your attempts. 

When even crawling felt too demanding, you were left with no choices but to wait for someone to rescue you. Suddenly, you were submerged by an overwhelming feeling of hopelessness, and shame, that only worsened when you heard footsteps. You didn’t say anything, and only closed your eyes, hiding your tears behind your eyelids. You were softly praying that whoever is here would ignore your limp figure, scattered on the living-room’s floor, and do whatever they came here for as if you weren’t here. 

“Oh sweetie, no.. I won’t do that,” a feminine voice softly said, and you immediately recognize it as Wanda’s. It holds a gentleness that is unique. 

Your suspicions are confirmed a moment later, when the woman kneels beside you. For a second, you thought about pushing her away, especially when her hand brushes your hair out of your face. The witch is aware of that, but she also knows that, deep down,  behind the walls that you’ve built to protect yourself, you were craving for her attention. That’s why the woman didn’t remove her hand right away, a sad smile stretching her lips when she realized how you were leaning into her touch.

“Are you hungry?” She eventually asked, and you opened your eyes, a bit surprised by the sudden question. You blink, twice, unable to give the woman a verbal answer — But she doesn’t need one. She is perfectly aware of why you came downstairs, and she doesn’t need to use her mind-reading abilities to know that, already aware of how you have been refusing to eat anything for the past few days. “Good,” she whispered, careful with her words. She couldn’t risk you shutting down, again. “Because I was cooking, but did way too much for one person,” she explained, smiling.

It is a lie, and you both are aware of that. 

It is past midnight, and the woman was probably just looking for some water. She definitely wasn’t cooking, and is probably not even hungry, but she knows that this innocent lie would help you to feel less guilty. The woman knows how stubborn you can be, and how you would probably have refused if she had proposed to cook you a meal, scared of wasting her time. Yet, she couldn’t let you go back to your room with only a snack. You need energy, if you want to get back on your feet as soon as possible.

“Come here,” she said when you hesitantly nodded, “let me help you,” she added, and you didn’t protest when the woman wrapped her arms around you — Her embrace was soft, and comforting. 

“I got you,” she whispered in your mind, “everything will be fine now,” and, this time, the words felt true. It has been a long time since you felt as safe as you did in the Witch’s arms, the woman being the only one who has never treated you differently, or hated you for what happened years ago. She was the hope that things could work out. 

THE END. —

| MOODBOARD — ✧ — MASTERLIST — ✧ — TO SAY SOMETHING

| Part one. Part two. Part three. the scars in our hearts (bonus part).

| Taglist — @cd-4848, @chocolatestrawberrykryptonite, @gemz5, @jusnough, @liasxeatt, @m0nsterqzzz, @marvelwomenarehot0, @mrsrushman, @riyaexee, @takeyaki, @taliiiaasteria.

[swappermanent]

Gym Crush (Part 2)

Read Part 1 by @exploratorytfs.

It’s been a year and a half since the swap, and not a day goes by that I don’t think about how crazy it all was. You might be wondering—why would I trade the life I had? I mean, I had it pretty damn good.

Before all this, I was hot. Not just passable, but the kind of hot that turned heads. I had worked my ass off to look the way I did—hours at the gym, eating clean, all of it. And then there was Edgar. God, Edgar. This dude was a walking Greek statue: broad shoulders, a thick chest, veins for days. I mean, it wasn’t just the muscles; it was the way he carried himself. Confidence, swagger, like he knew he could get whatever he wanted. And yeah, I guess at the time, he was my boyfriend.

But even with all of that—being hot, dating a hunk like Edgar—I just couldn’t do it anymore.

You’re probably thinking I’m nuts. I mean, guys like Edgar don’t come around often, especially not for guys like me. Let’s be real, most dudes who look like him wouldn’t even give a trans guy like me the time of day. So, yeah, I was lucky. At least, that’s what I kept telling myself. I should’ve been happy, but the truth is... I wasn’t.

Why? Well, Edgar. He wanted me to be this perfect, submissive, fem bottom. And look, I’ve got nothing against that. There are guys out there who rock that vibe, who own it, and good for them. That’s just not who I am.

I know, I know—saying this out loud would probably get me canceled in half the gay bars across the country. But I really am masc for masc. Always have been. I’m not saying it to be some sort of gatekeeper or anything; it’s just... that’s what I’ve always wanted for myself.

And it’s not just about who I’m attracted to—it’s about me, too. My whole life, I’ve been trying to prove I’m man enough. To the world. To other guys. Hell, even to myself.

Transitioning was the first step, obviously. But it wasn’t enough. I wanted to look the part, you know? That’s why I inked myself up. And the gym was my second home, but even after countless hours of sweat and dedication, I could never quite bulk up. No matter how much protein I shoved down or how hard I lifted, my frame stayed twinky.

Don’t get me wrong—there were plenty of guys who loved me for it. I mean, twinks are kind of a whole thing, right? A lot of guys would’ve killed to look like I did, but that wasn’t the point. It didn’t feel like me. I didn’t just want to be a guy; I wanted to be a man. The kind of man Edgar was.

And Edgar... he didn’t see me that way. Sure, he’d call me hot, touch me like he couldn’t get enough, but then he’d taunt me. He’d weaponize my body. Every time he called me “pussy boy” or made some comment about how he was more of a man than I was, it chipped away at me. He might’ve thought it was playful, but to me it was cruel. And I couldn’t take it anymore.

Initially, I thought if I just stuck it out, maybe things would change. Maybe he’d see me differently, respect me more. He didn’t. My self-esteem tanked. I started dreading the time we spent together, and eventually, I just... stopped putting out.

And of course, that’s when things really fell apart. Edgar doesn’t do well with rejection—big shocker, right? So yeah, I wasn’t exactly surprised when Edgar came sliding back into my DMs after. But honestly, I wasn’t planning on responding. I’d already been down that road, and I’d told myself after the last time—no more.

Still, when I saw what he was pitching, I couldn’t help but be curious. Swapping bodies with a cis guy? At first, I rolled my eyes. Like, thats even possible. But the more I thought about it, the more curious I got.

The guy Edgar had in mind? Not exactly a stunner. When Edgar sent me his photo, I remember staring at it for way longer than I should’ve, trying to pick out anything redeeming. The dude was... average. A little too soft in the face, a little too plain. But, to be fair, there was some potential there. Barely.

His eyes were nice, though—kind of soulful, in a way that made you think he might be a good guy deep down. And the kicker? He was taller than me by a good 6  inches. That alone had my interest. But let’s not kid ourselves; the real selling point was the fact that he had a cock.

That was the dream, wasn’t it? My own cock. I’d spent years dealing with the disappointment of not being able to fully live out the life I wanted. Transitioning had given me so much, but this? This was the missing piece. In this kid’s body, I could finally live out the fantasy that had been sitting in the back of my mind for years.

I could be the top I’d always wanted to be. I could take guys home, pin them down, and breed them with my own cock and fill them with my own cum. No more strap-ons, no more awkward positioning—just me, fully in charge, giving them EVERY. SINGLE. INCH.

Maybe with a little muscle here, a little polish there, I could make it something great.

So I said yes.

I’m not gonna lie—the first year in this body wasn’t easy. Adjusting to a new frame, new habits, new... everything? Yeah, it was a grind. But if there’s one thing I’ve always had, it’s work ethic. Between that and this body’s naturally high testosterone—and okay, yeah, I might’ve dipped into some steroids here and there—I’d say I built myself up pretty damn good.

Look at me now. I run my own training service. I mean, it’s not like I’m the most skilled coach out there or anything. But honestly? That doesn’t seem to matter much. Guys line up for my programs, and we all know why. They don’t just want my advice—they want to look like me. I’m walking inspiration. Living proof that the dream is achievable, or at least that’s how they see it.

And man, the way people treat me now? Everyone’s calling me “bro” or “dude” every other sentence. Not that they didn’t before—I’ve always leaned into that vibe—but there’s something about hearing it now that hits different. Maybe it’s the weight of my cock swinging in my shorts as they say it. It’s like the final piece of the puzzle clicked into place. Everything just feels... right.

And the best part? This manhood of mine? Oh, it’s gotten around.

I mean, come on. Looking like this, how could it not? Guys want me. They crave me. They crave my fleshy, thick, no kidding, natural, beer can of a cock throbbing inside of them.They’ll do whatever it takes to get a night with me, and honestly, who could blame them?

[vivwritesfics]

Drive Me Crazy

Chapter Four

None of you are used to pack dynamics. Unlike then, it made you near feral. There's nothing more they want than to build you back up.

Lestappen X Reader

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three

"You're okay, Beastie. You did good."

It hadn't been an easy race for either Ferrari driver. You and Charles had both struggled, through no fault of your own, during the race. The strategy was shit and the car struggled on track.

"You're okay, Beastie," your handler said, combing her fingers through your hair. "You can stop now. You can breathe."

She was trying to calm you down, Charles realised as he watched you.

Beastie. What an awful nickname, simply awful. Charles watched as your handler handed you earbuds. Your hands shook as you placed them into your ears, a whimper leaving your lips.

Beastie. You weren't a beast. Charles could see it, and he was sure that everybody else could see it, too. You weren't a beast; you just wanted to be free.

He strode across the garage, strode over to you. "What're you listening to?" He asked, his voice soft.

A whimper left your lips and you clawed at your shock collar. "Woah, woah," he whispered and grabbed a hold of your hands, stopping you from hurting yourself. "You're okay, Birdy."

Birdy. Charles wasn't very sure where it came from, but it felt right. It suited you. Birdy. You just wanted to be free. Free as a bird. Another noise left your lips, one that Charles was unable to place. "Wanna tell me what you're listening to?" He asked and pushed your hair out of your face.

You wouldn't answer. Charles knew this, he wasn't expect you to open your mouth to answer, but to somehow communicate it to him. Maybe pull your earbud from your ear and offer it too him instead.

Your handler stepped forward. "She discovered your music last night," she said and nodded to Charles. "She finds it's calming, so I thought it might help take her out of 'Race Space'."

"Race Space?"

Race Space. The headspace you went into as soon as you were in the car. It left you acting on instinct, going for every gap and having no self preservation. It would have been terrifying to watch, if you had anybody that cared about you."

"She likes my music?" Charles couldn't stop himself from answering as he looked at you. You liked his music. At that very moment, you were listening to his music. "Birdy," he whispered, unable to stop himself from grinning.

Charles couldn't help but think about it for the next few hours. As he flew back to Monaco, sharing a jet with Pierre. Maybe one day you could share a jet with them, too. But you weren't in the position for a private jet yet. Once you were a proper driver, no longer driving in the place of an injured Carlos, Charles would take you everywhere in his private yet, he decided.

And then you'd be flying. As free as a bird.

"You're attached," Max said as he watched Charles.

Sitting at the piano, Charles couldn't stop himself from thinking about you. He pressed a couple of the keys, no song really coming from it. "I am," he confirmed, giving a small nod. "I really am, Max."

Max released a sigh as he walked over. He slipped onto the bench beside Charles and wrapped his arms around him. "What're we gonna do about it?" He asked.

"I don't know, Max," Charles answered through a sigh. "I really don't know."

***

Home. A small room with several locks on the door to keep people safe from you. Locked in, Charles's music playing on a loop. This was better, you knew. You locked away from the rest of the world.

Birdy.

You had been a beast for so long that Birdy felt weird. Weird, but not exactly wrong. Birdy, because you wanted to fly away and be free. Birdy was fitting, you realised.

Birdy.

You liked it. Really liked it. Far better than Beasty. A beast was what you had been turned into, not what you wanted to be. You were never supposed to be a beast and you no longer wanted to be one.

Birdy.

The music stopped and you released a whimper. Tapping at the iPod screen, you got the music playing again, the piano filling the room. Your eyes closed as you laid back on your bed, holding your pillow against your chest.

Charles was nice. He was real nice, in a way nobody but your handler had been before. Why had you tried to bite him? Why had you acted out like that? But, still, he was sweet to you. Sweet, even after you had attempted to attack him.

You wouldn't, not again. You wouldn't attack the next time he was nice to you. It was easy to picture it in your mind, your muzzle removed as you hugged Charles, nuzzling yourself against his chest. But you were looking at it through rose coloured glasses.

It wouldn't be as simple as not attacking and you knew that. The reaction was involuntary: You couldn't help it. Couldn't stop yourself from lashing out and trying to hurt him.

"Birdy," you whispered to yourself and started his music again. "Birdy. Birdy. Birdy."

You couldn't wait for the next race weekend.

You didn't have to wait long, just a week. That week you spent training, in the gym, listening to your trainer like an obedient dog. When she said run, you ran. When she said lift, you lifted.

There was just one reason why you didn't like the gym. It allowed you to let out your aggression in a way that stopped anybody from getting hurt. But the collar around your neck and the muzzle attached to your face made the gym uncomfortable, skin beneath them prickling.

On the Tuesday, you flew to Miami. You were sedated for the entirety of the flight. It didn't take away your fear, just stopped you from acting on it.

You woke up in the taxi on your way to the hotel. How disorienting it was, to suddenly regain conscious in a different part of the world, so similar to your home, yet somehow different.

You panicked. Not enough to hurt anybody in the car with you. But your nails dug into your palms, pressing deep enough to draw blood.

"Enough of that, Beasty," your handler commented and patted your knee. Maybe she was trying to give you comfort. Whatever it was, it didn't help.

She got you into the hotel, her grip on your sleeve acting as a leash. As soon as she had your key (she always kept your room key. It was almost a threat: If you left you couldn't get back in), she led you to the stairs.

No lifts, you were too feral for that. They were too much like cages, and you didn't do cages.

“Rest, little Beast,” she said as you placed your bags in your room. Rest. You've done enough resting already. You didn't need anymore rest. “I'll come get you in the morning.”

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[reareaotaku]

If you accept what Yandere Viktor would be like, with a reader a little younger than him... I kind of comically imagine that the reader once innocently said he saw him as his father...

Note: Viktor is in love with the reader, but has not yet declared himself.

((Imagine how funny and sad it would be if the person you liked saw you as a father figure and not a future boyfriend/husband.))

You're from @yan-randomfandom blog, huh?

Tw: Suggestive/Implied NSFW

Originally, he took you under his wing as his successor, as he had no children of his own. He had years over your head, so why did it feel like you understand him? Like you knew him better than anyone in his years; Only you could understand him.

You had never had a present father figure in your life, so when Viktor took you under his wing, you were quick to take a liking to him. In fact, you adored him. His mind was well beyond his years and you admired him for it. He was everything you ever wanted and the father you never did.

So, imagine your surprise when it seemed something more was a foot... Viktor had started to act strange- Stranger than usual. He had been... well affectionate.

---

You liked Viktor's study, it reminded you so much of him. His writing and theories covered the walls and tables and it gave you motivation to do whatever you were doing. You straightened up when hearing the door open. You turned your head when hearing the door close and let out a sigh when seeing Viktor.

You smile, standing up and walking over to him. He opens his arms and encases you into a hug, squeezing you tight. You can feel him twirling your hair in between his hand and feel him humming from deep within his chest.

"I love you, Y/n."

"I love you, too, Viktor."

It was such an insignificant thing to you. You did love Viktor, but you didn't realize what you were signing yourself up for.

---

Viktor was handsome, anyone with eyes could see that, but you saw him as so much more. He was caring, compassionate, and intelligent. You sometimes wished you could be with more, but it seemed taboo, so you never pushed for anything more.

Viktor, though, was starting to lose his patience. How much longer could he play the long game and hope you pick up on his courtship? It was like a game with you. A one-sided game where the other player had no idea they were playing.

You felt like you were playing tug-a-war with your mind and heart. Your mind said it was wrong, since he was your mentor, but your heart claimed he was so much more. He was everything... But maybe you were just obsessed? Infatuated.

Viktor would never describe himself as the infatuated or even obsessed type. Though, with you, he couldn't control himself. You were perfect.

---

Viktor watched you continue to write your papers, as he leaned back in his chair. You had to feel his eyes on you, but it seemed it didn't bother you. He liked that about you; You held yourself highly, even though you were surrounded by prestigious assholes who thought they were better than you. You were better than that and you knew that. You were special.

You felt eyes on you and looked back to see Viktor. A light pink dusted your cheek, and you quickly covered your face as you looked away. It felt a little childish to hide your crush like a school teen, but you couldn't help it.

---

It was getting late. You could see the moon high in the sky and you were worried about the dangerous sidewalks. You should have been home hours ago, but now it was to late to go on bout the should haves.

You were startled when hearing the door open.

"You're still here?"

"Uh, yeah, I guess I got really sucked in."

You hear Viktor hum as his footsteps get closer. "Why don't you stay here tonight?"

"With you?" Your eyes widened and you quickly covered your mouth when the words left your mouth. Both of your faces turned a light pink and he looks away from you while rubbing the back of his neck.

"I mean... If you want too obviously."

"Of course I'd want too- I mean, you know, because it's so late..."

"Of course... Of course," He pats your shoulder in a reassuring way and you sigh, your shoulders relaxing.

---

You laid in his bed, staring at the ceiling. What were you with this man? You looked over at Viktor, wondering if he saw you as something more then a pupil. He had too... Didn't he?

You watch him stir in his sleep and you sit up, covering yourself with the blanket. He groans and rubs his head, before he too sits up. He runs a hand through his hair, before freezing when realizing he wasn't alone in the bed.

He looks over to you and his face turned a dark red. "Uh, Y/n-"

"Viktor..."

"Soo..."

There's a moment of silence, before you chuckle, causing him to look at you confused.

"You know, uh, I used to see you as like a father. I never thought we would be... something else."

"Father? Me? Seriously?"

You look over at him, feeling the awkwardness go away. "Yeah. I mean how could I not?"

"I would be a terrible father."

"But you'd be a better lover?"

"No... No, I wouldn't.

[fallstaticexit]

Prev / Next / Beginning

TW: Conversion "Therapy" Mention / Homophobia

AN: Sorry this one took a while! - longer than I'd like away!. Coming back from a mini vaca and getting back into work and routine is a nightmare, also my delicate sleep schedule is ruineddd. Anywho, we should be back in business now! :) now, DJ play Good Luck, Babe by Chappell Roan!

Transcript under the cut

Geoffrey: Great job, bud! Tree is looking great!

Malcolm: It’s because I’m a decorator like mommy.

Jonathan: Mom, are you leaving? We’re supposed to decorate the tree too.

Nancy: Save a few ornaments for me to put on there, darling. Mommy has to step out for a couple hours.

Geoffrey: Johnny’s right, you know. Decorating it is apart of the deal.

Nancy: Can’t you spare me an hour or two?

Geoffrey: Remember what I said about being there?

Nancy: That’s not fair. I’ve been doing better, haven’t I? I left work early, which I’m hardly ever able to do and we found the tree together. I haven’t seen Vanessa in 16 years, Geoffrey. This is important to me.

Geoffrey: Yeah, well, this is pretty important to them.

Nancy: Please don’t make me feel guilty about this.

Geoffrey: It’s just you and Vanessa, right?

Nancy: [frowns] Yes, of course. I’ll be back, ok?

-

Vanessa: I’m glad you came.

Nancy: I wouldn’t have miss this for the world.

Vanessa: You look so beautiful tonight.

Nancy: [blushes] So do you. You’ve always have.

Vanessa: [smiles] I wasn’t sure on your choice of champagne, so I hope you don’t mind we have mine. I guess it’s one of the many things we’ll have to learn about each other.

Nancy: This is perfect. I’m sure I’ll love anything you like.

Nancy Narrates: [I found myself unable to eat. Instead, I got my fill of her. I studied her, consumed the sight of her with greedy, curious eyes]

Nancy Narrates: [It thrilled and frightened me the way she took me in too, as if she was trying to recall all those precious details that may have gotten lost in time. Seeing all the ways I could have changed and stayed the same]

Nancy Narrates: [One thing was for certain: my heart still raced the moment our fingers found one another, just like when we were girls. It was a delicate and familiar touch that I could feel from inside, and it was almost as if no time had passed at all]

Vanessa: [softly] Nancy, Nancy, Nancy, the woman you’ve become. I’ve thought of you, over time, what kind of woman you grew up to be.

Nancy: Is it what you expected?

Vanessa: Successful? Powerful? Stunning? Yes, I like to think so.

Nancy: I’ve thought of you too.

Vanessa: Yeah?

Nancy: I thought about what you did, after high school. Who you became. If you fell in love. If you thought about me too. Feels good, knowing you did.

Vanessa: I think holding on to the version of you I remembered kept me sane, after all this time. Do you mind if I smoke? Helps my nerves.

Nancy: As long as I can bum one.

Vanessa: Hey, do you remember our first cigarette together?

Nancy: How could I forget?

Vanessa: Share a light with me. For old times’ sake?

Vanessa: So, care to share all those burning questions you said you had for me?

Nancy: Now I feel like I’m being put on the spot.

Vanessa: Oh, come on. Don’t go shy on me now. How’s this? I’ll ask a question, then you, and so on.

Nancy: Alright. Shoot.

Vanessa: Do you still talk in your sleep?

Nancy: I- what!? I did not talk in my sleep!

Vanessa: Oh, yes you did. Full sentences too. You monologued even.

Nancy: Fuck off, I did NOT talk in my sleep! How would you know anyway? You were practically narcoleptic. I’d be up for hours after you fell asleep.

Vanessa: [murmurs] Still talks in her sleep- in denial about it. Ok. Got it. Your turn.

Nancy: I’ll ask a REAL question this time.

Vanessa: [smirks] That was a real question. I came all this way just to know but ok, ask away.

Nancy: Well, speaking of ‘all this way’. Where do you live?

Vanessa: Here and there. I don’t like to sit in one spot for too long; I get restless. Bored. I’ve spent the last 6 months in Tomorang. Beautiful people. Lovely culture. That’s actually where I heard your name mentioned for the first time. You’ve got quite the reputation over there. You’ve been up to no good, I hear.

Nancy: Christ...long story. Please don’t ask. Are you thinking of moving here?

Vanessa: Ah, ah. It’s my turn. Let’s see...ah! Who’s idea was it to make Geoffrey ‘Mr. Landgraab’. That’s probably the funniest shit I’ve ever heard.

Nancy: My parents, of course. They didn’t want to erase the family name and since they no longer have a son to continue their legacy- well. You get it. Speaking of marriage, are you married?

Vanessa: No, I’m not married.

Nancy: Well. Are you...seeing anyone?

Vanessa: [smirks] No.

Nancy: Children?

Vanessa: No children either. Those counts as a question, by the way.

Nancy: Oops. Ok, ok, you can ask two then. It’s only fair.

Vanessa: I guess I’ll ask a ‘real question’ then. Are you happy like this?

Nancy: [pauses] Like...what?

Vanessa: Married. Married to him. Does it make you happy?

Nancy: [shifts] I care for him very much. He’s the father of my children. He’s a good man and he’s good to me. Why are you asking me this-

Vanessa: Do you still like women?

Nancy: Do you?!

Vanessa: You have to answer my question first-

Nancy: Did you get my voicemail? November 2nd, 1993. I called you and I left you a voicemail. Did you hear it?

Vanessa: Nancy-

Nancy: Why didn’t you call me back? What—what happened to you, Vanessa? Where did you go? Where have you been!? Why, after all this time, am I just now seeing you?

Vanessa: It’s not really the easiest thing to talk about, but I know I owe you closure. [exhales] After I was pulled out of school, my father had me admitted. I received treatments to ‘fix’ me. Every time I fucked up and pissed off my father, he’d pack me up and ship me off until I came back normal and obedient.

Vanessa: There were days I thought I couldn’t keep going on like that, but then I heard your voicemail, and it... scared me. It made me angry. It broke my heart, but most importantly, it woke me up. I finally found the strength to escape my father and live my own truth. It cost me everything—my family disowned me. I relinquished my fortune, but in return, I’m free. I’m free, and I can live the life I deserve. I just... I wish I could have called, but life didn’t work out that way.

Nancy: It should have because I did call you, Vanessa.

Vanessa: I know.

Nancy: [weakly] I said that I loved you..

Vanessa: I know, I know...things were different for me back then.

Nancy: Things are different now! I’m married. I’m a mother!

Vanessa: I know, Nancy. I didn’t come here to break up a happy home.

Nancy: Why did you come here?

Vanessa: Can’t a girl miss her best friend?

Vanessa: Listen. I’ve thought a lot about how I would fit into your life if I ever got to see you again, if this was something you would want at all. That time we shared in our youth was the happiest I’ve ever been. I missed that feeling. I’ve missed you. I’m in a place to explore a friendship with you again, if you want it. If not, then I’ll accept that.

Nancy: I do want this. I want you here. I just...I can’t...

Vanessa: I know. It could be simple. Easy. I miss you, Nancy.

Nancy: [sighs] I miss you too. I’ve missed you so much.

[seitmai]

As always many thoughts...

You laughed at his unexpected response as he ran his rough fingers along Rose's fuzzy hair. "Don't forget about the seafood platters." "Sweetheart, I'll never forget about the seafood platters," he promised, turning to look at you as his head sank back against the couch.

Of course he wouldn't 😅

"I am." His brown eyes remained fixed on yours. "I am. I told you I was. I want them close, but not too close. Like, I don't want them next door where they can hear me call you my filthy little slut or something." "Bradley," you said, laughing again as he took Rose in his hands to burp her. "They don't need to know the ins and outs of how you call me Daddy while you're gagging on my cock either." He kissed the baby on her forehead. "Sorry, Nugget. I'll teach you one day how babies are made, and you'll probably cringe the whole time."

Hahah this whole conversation cracked me up 😂

You couldn't believe how quickly he shut it down. "It was just an idea," you mumbled, watching him snuggle the baby. "So you wouldn't have to miss Rose the whole time while you're away."

Ok rude of Bradley, it was just a nice thought 🙄😒

You nodded and hummed, lips brushing the scars on his neck. "I'm just happy you remembered." "Sweetheart, I remember everything," he promised. "And I propose that we plan a trip for the three of us before the year is over. We can go anywhere you and the Nugget want."

🥰🥰🥰

"We'll be fast," he replied confidently, turning off the stove burner. "You're never fast! You like to linger!" "It's a new era, Baby Girl. The mom and dad era. I'll learn how to be quick so we can finish before she wakes up."

Haha I can't with him

"Oh, I love this so much," he whined as his other fingers found your clit. "I'm not happy about making this quick. I might need more later."

Of course he does 🤭

He could already hear Rose getting restless in the nursery down the hallway, her soft cries ramping up as Bradley slammed his cock into his wife. He wanted to make sure he got you off before he was done, but then you went and said something so hot, he knew he wasn't going to be able to hold on much longer. "I could always nurse you later if you want." "I take it you're interested in my offer." "Absolutely," he rasped, pulling his pants up so he could go say hi to his daughter. "If I ever say no to your tits, something is definitely wrong, Baby Girl. That would be your cue to take me out back and finish me off."

🤭🤭🤭

"When's the wedding?" you asked Jake as you dropped your tray next to his at lunch. He was eating the most delicious looking burger and a slice of pizza, and your soup and salad looked pitiful next to them. Seemingly no matter what you did, you'd stopped losing weight since the baby was born, and right now you were so exhausted, you couldn't even think about starting an exercise regimen.

Oh no, she is too hard on herself 🥺

"We've been engaged less than a month," Jake drawled, shoving some of the accompanying fries into his mouth. "Maybe some of us can wait a little longer to get hitched than your husband could, Angel."

Oh don't act like a saint Jake, we all know you wanna marry her sooner rather than later an if Cat had a buch of trauma and needs time because of that, they would have been married already 😅

Jake heaved a deep sigh, dragging a fry through ketchup. "He already calls me 'dad'. His speech was delayed, but it was still one of his first words, probably because I was around so much. I want to make sure Cat's ex doesn't get any rights, and if that means I need to hire another legal team before we get married, then so be it."

Dad Jake 🥹🥰

Maybe you could just get pizza. But you shouldn't. But it sounded so good as you watched Jake eat his. But your hips and belly were already so big, you couldn't let yourself.

Maybe maybe there is something else going on, hmm 🤭

"You look like a DILF."

He sure does 😌

"Be honest, how many of these do you think I'll need?" You snorted. "Unless every night is happy hour at the Copacabana, probably none. But knowing you, I'd pack at least two."

Hahaha this is so Bradley 😅

"This sucks," Bradley said for probably the hundredth time in the past hour. Standing at the curb at San Diego International Airport with a beautiful wife and a beautiful daughter, being forced to leave them for a week, was actually awful. He didn't want to go. He wanted to continue to cradle Rose against his chest with his arm wrapped around you until he missed his flight. "You need to go or you'll miss your flight. And then Mav will be on my case about it."

He just loves to be with his girls 🥰

Before he ducked inside, he cupped his free hand to his mouth and shouted, "I love you!" He watched you blow him a kiss and then pull away from the curb before he headed to the counter to drop off his bag.

🥰🥰🥰 

To his absolute delight, all he had to do was ask nicely and flash his most charming smile, and he was handed the keys to a brand new, black Bronco. It was a model year newer than your red one back at home, and he was excited to scrutinize all of the little differences as he drove it around for the week.

He is living his best life 😅

Was he really that guy? Did he already miss his kid enough that he had to open up the photo gallery in his phone and scroll through a few pictures before he could drive away?

Yes, he absolutely 100% is

"Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw," she said, eyes snapping back up to meet his. "All the way from Top Gun. I've been waiting to meet you for weeks, Sir."

Oh oh this feels like trouble 😬🫣

Aim for the Sky Part 27 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Bradley is required to travel for a week, and both you and he are exhausted. He's hoping this will mean fewer deployments in the future, but in the present, he's going to need to remember where his responsibilities lie.

Warnings: Angst, adult language, lactation kink, body image, fluff, smut, DILF Roo

Length: 3900 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader

Aim for the Sky masterlist. This was written to accompany my series Is It Working For You? along with a bunch of my one-shots and other series, but it can be read on its own! Check my masterlist for the reading order.

Once again, your parents extended their stay to spend more time with Rose, but when they finally flew back to Maryland, it felt strange to be on your own with your daughter. You and Bradley fell into a regular routine once more, but it took him days before he came clean about being stressed out. When he got home late from work to find you on the couch feeding Rose, you could tell by the set of his shoulders that he'd had a long day.

"Can we talk about some things?" he asked, bending to untie his boots. You'd been wanting him to confide in you for days, but you were already exhausted again from the late night feedings and had pushed the comments Bradley made to Jake to the back burner.

"What's on your mind?" you asked, secretly pleased that he leaned down to give you a long, needy kiss, complete with his big hand on your neck, before kissing Rose as she ate. It had been a few days since you and he were intimate, and your body was already responding to him as he dropped down on the couch next to you.

"Can we just move to La Jolla? Nothing stresses me out when we have copious amounts of champagne and oral sex."

You laughed at his unexpected response as he ran his rough fingers along Rose's fuzzy hair. "Don't forget about the seafood platters."

"Sweetheart, I'll never forget about the seafood platters," he promised, turning to look at you as his head sank back against the couch. "Your mom and dad are serious about moving out here."

Your smile started to fade away. "Yeah, Roo. They are. And I thought you were pleased by that fact."

"I am." His brown eyes remained fixed on yours. "I am. I told you I was. I want them close, but not too close. Like, I don't want them next door where they can hear me call you my filthy little slut or something."

"Bradley," you said, laughing again as he took Rose in his hands to burp her.

"They don't need to know the ins and outs of how you call me Daddy while you're gagging on my cock either." He kissed the baby on her forehead. "Sorry, Nugget. I'll teach you one day how babies are made, and you'll probably cringe the whole time."

You sighed and reached for Bradley, cupping his jaw in your hand and stroking his mustache with your thumb. "My parents are seriously getting their house ready to sell. So just give it to me straight."

He nodded. "I don't want them over here all the time, okay? I love them, I really do, but they take over our house when they come. And even though we finished the attic so they could have a place to stay when they're here, Rosie can move her bedroom up there when she's older. So it wasn't a waste of time since the contractor saw your tits."

"It was a photo of my tits! I didn't just whip them out for him to see!" Now Bradley was laughing as you said, "It sounds like you're worried about having some boundaries if my parents become our new neighbors."

"Yes," he replied, nodding as you ran your fingers along his jaw. "That."

"I'm sure we can have a conversation with them and address all of your concerns." Rose seemed to be done burping, and you were treated to the view of Bradley cuddling your four month old against his chest. "Now, can you tell me what else made you have a bad day at work?"

"What makes you think I had a bad day?" he asked, placing soft kisses on Rose's cheek. "I could never have a bad day when I get to come home to my girls." You sighed as he ran his nose along her hair and inhaled deeply before he met your gaze. "Okay. It's not the end of the world, but Mav informed me that I need to take a trip to the Naval Airstation in Fort Worth. I don't really have any details yet."

"Okay," you replied softly, finally voicing what had been on your mind. "Well, maybe Rose and I can come with you for a few days? I can't remember exactly how much vacation time I have left, but it could be fun. And you did say the next trip should be for the three of us to enjoy together."

Bradley shrugged and immediately said, "Fort Worth in August? Baby Girl, it's going to be miserably hot. I know you, for some reason, miss the east coast humidity, but this is going to be gross. Ask Jake about it, he's from that ridiculous state."

You couldn't believe how quickly he shut it down. "It was just an idea," you mumbled, watching him snuggle the baby. "So you wouldn't have to miss Rose the whole time while you're away."

His head tipped back as he sighed. "I'm taking this new position so I can hopefully deploy less often and be here more later on. Even if I have to start working longer days, a week or two away from home is nothing compared to five months."

You bristled. "I understand that, Roo. We've talked about this so much. But maybe try to be a little bit more patient with the idea of my parents moving here so I can have a support system when you're busy?"

When you stood and rushed toward the bedroom, Bradley was right behind you, hand reaching out to grab your shoulder while he still held Rose tight. "Are you mad at me?"

Your stomach roiled with irritation, annoyance and disdain. You hated when you got like this, because he was the one who could bring out the best and also the worst in you. "I don't know."

-------------------------------

You were kind of quiet at home. Bradley hated it. You were a bit more vocal during sex, but that certainly didn't make him feel any better about the rest of it.

"I have my dates for Fort Worth," he informed you when he strolled in from work with some yellow flowers and a new book for Rose. Today was important to him. He wasn't sure you'd remember why, but he still wanted to acknowledge it.

"When?" you asked, continuing to make dinner while he looked around for the baby. "She's napping in her crib," you added, seemingly knowing he always wanted his daughter nearby.

"Second week of August," he replied. "So, pretty soon. But just for a week." You nodded as Bradley walked closer, and he realized what you were cooking. "Marry Me Rooster?"

"Yeah." Your voice was soft as you looked at him over your shoulder. You were also still wearing your khaki uniform, and he could tell you were tired. He was tired, too, but he wanted things to feel more natural around here again. He didn't want to accept that this was just how things would be now when the two of you were taking turns getting up with Rose all the time.

He wished he hadn't made such a fuss about your parents, because he really did love them, and it would be nice to have some help occasionally. And now he felt like you were continually annoyed with him, and he had to figure out a way to fix this.

Your voice broke into his thoughts. "It's kind of a special day?" 

You sounded unsure. Like you thought maybe he didn't remember. But a smile immediately found his lips, and he gestured to the flowers. He should have known you'd remember. You remembered everything. You just made him a seafood platter to celebrate Carole's birthday the other day.

"I proposed two years ago." You visibly relaxed at his words as you took the flowers in your hands. He stroked the diamond ring on your finger as he said, "I couldn't wait another minute after I found this in the storage unit. I needed you to wear it. I needed you to say yes." You melted into his arms, and he kissed your forehead. "Can I go ahead and propose something else right now?"

You nodded and hummed, lips brushing the scars on his neck. "I'm just happy you remembered."

"Sweetheart, I remember everything," he promised. "And I propose that we plan a trip for the three of us before the year is over. We can go anywhere you and the Nugget want."

Your eyes lit up as he cupped your perfect cheek in his hand. "I have so many ideas, Roo."

"I knew you would. Can I make another proposal?" When you raised one eyebrow, he whispered, "How about we mess around before Rose wakes up?"

He was already wrapping his arms around you, turning you toward the hallway when you said, "But what about dinner?"

"We'll be fast," he replied confidently, turning off the stove burner.

"You're never fast! You like to linger!"

"It's a new era, Baby Girl. The mom and dad era. I'll learn how to be quick so we can finish before she wakes up."

This was the closest thing to a true quickie Bradley had experienced in a long time. Maybe ever. You were pushed up against the wall just inside the bedroom, belt jingling with your pants down around your thighs. He was going hard at a nice, steady pace with his hand inside your bra. Your warm milk dripped between his fingers and along his palm as he whimpered. 

"Oh, I love this so much," he whined as his other fingers found your clit. "I'm not happy about making this quick. I might need more later."

He could already hear Rose getting restless in the nursery down the hallway, her soft cries ramping up as Bradley slammed his cock into his wife. He wanted to make sure he got you off before he was done, but then you went and said something so hot, he knew he wasn't going to be able to hold on much longer. 

"I could always nurse you later if you want."

When he came, his vision flooded with dizzying color. Bradley lapped your milk from his hand, moaning your name as his hips eventually slowed. Rose was wailing now as you bent down to pull your pants up, cum dripping down your inner thighs as you looked at him with a little grin.

"I take it you're interested in my offer."

"Absolutely," he rasped, pulling his pants up so he could go say hi to his daughter. "If I ever say no to your tits, something is definitely wrong, Baby Girl. That would be your cue to take me out back and finish me off." You laughed when he said, "Happy engagement anniversary. I'll go take care of the Nugget."

-----------------------------

"When's the wedding?" you asked Jake as you dropped your tray next to his at lunch. He was eating the most delicious looking burger and a slice of pizza, and your soup and salad looked pitiful next to them. Seemingly no matter what you did, you'd stopped losing weight since the baby was born, and right now you were so exhausted, you couldn't even think about starting an exercise regimen.

"We've been engaged less than a month," Jake drawled, shoving some of the accompanying fries into his mouth. "Maybe some of us can wait a little longer to get hitched than your husband could, Angel." You rolled your eyes dramatically at him, but you were fighting a smile. "I'm trying my best to make sure that everything is in order for Jeremiah, if I'm being honest."

"Like what?" you asked, blowing on a spoonful of your soup.

Jake heaved a deep sigh, dragging a fry through ketchup. "He already calls me 'dad'. His speech was delayed, but it was still one of his first words, probably because I was around so much. I want to make sure Cat's ex doesn't get any rights, and if that means I need to hire another legal team before we get married, then so be it."

Tears stung your eyes as you patted his cheek gently. You knew you were lucky that you and Bradley were together and that he would do anything to take care of his child, but right now you were just so happy for Jeremiah. "He's such a sweet kid, Jake. And you love him so much."

"I do," he replied before taking an enormous bite out of his burger. You let him chew in silence while you picked at your lunch. Right now, you really wished Bradley was here, but the chances of him showing up were slim when he was out shadowing Maverick again. He was leaving in a few days for Texas, and you were feeling pretty emotional. It would just be you and Rose at home for a whole week by yourselves.

"Well, if you're looking for a nice venue, I know a good parking lot."

Jake barked out a laugh. "There's too much sentimental Bradshaw bullshit in that parking lot. No way I'd be allowed to get married there."

Then Cat showed up, and Jake's attention immediately shifted to her. You poked your salad around on your plate, wondering why you were so damn tired. You still had four more hours of work to get through before you had to pick Rose up and make dinner. Maybe you could just get pizza. But you shouldn't. But it sounded so good as you watched Jake eat his. But your hips and belly were already so big, you couldn't let yourself.

Your afternoon was filled with checking code that someone in Annapolis had entered, and they'd done a really shitty job. When you left your office, your eyes were tired, and you could feel yourself caving. You ordered a pizza and picked it up on your way home with Rose. Then you ate half of it on the couch while you fed her. And when you were done, you really wanted to cry, because you didn't know why you couldn't control yourself right now.

"I'm starving," Bradley groaned when he walked in. "You got pizza?" he asked, shoving two slices stacked up on top of each other into his mouth and moaning. Then he dropped down onto the couch and polished them off while you switched Rose to your other side. "I need to remember to pack my dress blues for Fort Worth."

"Why?"

Bradley shrugged and reached for the next slice. "Apparently, there's some sort of reception for the aviators that are selected for Top Gun in the fall. I don't know how much sway I'll have, but I'm really hoping I can pick some good ones for the next generation of the program since I'm aging out."

"You're not aging out, Roo!" you gasped. "You chose a different career trajectory!" 

"I mean..."

"Stop. You're not old. Don't even try to tell me you're old."

"I'll be forty soon."

"You're thirty-eight."

"That's almost forty."

"You look like a DILF."

He reached for the last slice of pizza, folded it up and ate it while he reached for Rose. Like usual, she curled up on her father. Her features looked so much like his, but he was always the first one to argue with you about that, so you said nothing while he chewed up his food.

"I need you to help me pack for hot as hell Texas. I'm thinking just shorts besides my flight suits and uniforms?"

"I'll help you as soon as Rose goes to sleep for the night."

Bradley took the reins for the rest of the evening while you tried not to fall asleep before the baby. That was much easier said than done, but at least Bradley supervised tummy time while Tramp licked Rose, and then he gave her a bath. He read bedtime stories and changed her into pajamas so you didn't have to, gently setting her in her crib before joining you where you sat in bed yawning.

"You okay?" he asked, brushing his lips along your cheek before heading to the closet to start pulling out clothes to pack.

"Yeah. I just wish I didn't order the pizza, because it's empty calories, and it probably made me feel worse and more exhausted in the long run."

"But it was delicious," he muttered, piling up some of his favorite tropical print shirts. "Be honest, how many of these do you think I'll need?"

You snorted. "Unless every night is happy hour at the Copacabana, probably none. But knowing you, I'd pack at least two."

"See, you understand," he muttered with a smile as you chose two of your favorites and handed them to him. It was strange watching him load things into a duffle bag for something other than a deployment or special mission. You knew exactly how long he'd be gone. You knew it was just for a week and that he could FaceTime you and Rose whenever he wanted to, but it still felt like you were sending him away.

"We're going to miss you." 

He immediately tossed the bag onto the floor and joined you in bed. "Don't cry, Baby Girl," he whispered, swiping at tears you hadn't realized were already filling your eyes. "I'll barely be gone at all. And I don't even have to finish packing tonight. I can do it later."

You nodded and let him envelope you in his warmth. That's how you eventually fell asleep.

----------------------------------

"This sucks," Bradley said for probably the hundredth time in the past hour. Standing at the curb at San Diego International Airport with a beautiful wife and a beautiful daughter, being forced to leave them for a week, was actually awful. He didn't want to go. He wanted to continue to cradle Rose against his chest with his arm wrapped around you until he missed his flight.

"You have to go now so hopefully you can do this less frequently in the future," you whispered, voice shaky with emotion. You looked really tired, and Bradley knew you wouldn't get much of a break this week. That's why he'd arranged for Nat to check on you at home a few times whether you wanted her to or not.

"Count on it, Sweetheart," he murmured, placing kisses to Rosie's soft hair as her little fingers poked at the insignia pins on his uniform. "And I need you to be a perfect Nugget for Mommy. I'll call later tonight after I get settled in the barracks."

"Okay." Your voice was muffled as you buried your face against his neck. "I love you."

"I love you both," he promised, collecting his final kisses from Rose before buckling her into her car seat in the back of the red Bronco. Then he got a particularly filthy kiss from you that left both of you grinning before you started to shove him toward the airport entrance.

"You need to go or you'll miss your flight. And then Mav will be on my case about it."

Before he ducked inside, he cupped his free hand to his mouth and shouted, "I love you!" He watched you blow him a kiss and then pull away from the curb before he headed to the counter to drop off his bag. 

He hated traveling like this, in his uniform. It felt like everyone milling around, trying to check their bags, was looking at him. He was only wearing it today, because he wasn't sure what to expect when he arrived at a base he'd only visited one time years ago. The last thing he wanted was to seem unprepared in front of an admiral, so he wore his khakis as a precaution.

"Lieutenant Commander. Where are you headed?" asked the airline agent when she looked at his pins.

Impressed, he replied, "Dallas-Fort Worth."

She took his duffle, wished him a good flight, and then Bradley slept for the entire time he was in the air. Maybe you weren't the only one who was exhausted, because the nap seemed to do wonders for him. He woke up feeling rested, and just as soon as he sent a text letting you know he landed, he was off in search of a rental car.

To his absolute delight, all he had to do was ask nicely and flash his most charming smile, and he was handed the keys to a brand new, black Bronco. It was a model year newer than your red one back at home, and he was excited to scrutinize all of the little differences as he drove it around for the week.

"Don't like the lack of a car seat," he muttered, tossing his bag onto the backseat where he was so used to seeing Rose's infant carrier. 

Was he really that guy? Did he already miss his kid enough that he had to open up the photo gallery in his phone and scroll through a few pictures before he could drive away? Apparently he was, and it made him ache to be away from her. This was so much worse than going to La Jolla without his daughter, because right now, he had neither of you.

When his stomach started rumbling for dinner, he drove to the barracks and showed his identification, only to be told his room wasn't ready yet. So he went right back out to the Bronco in search of dinner. He knew the name of a tavern popular with officers in the area, so he typed it into his GPS and headed in the direction it told him. He had to laugh, figuring he was about to walk into the Lone Star version of the Hard Deck, but that's kind of what he wanted right now. Dinner somewhere that felt comfortable if not familiar.

"Oof." It looked like a dump compared to his bar at home, but it seemed popular, and he was hungry enough that it didn't matter. When he walked in, he took a quick survey of the space before grabbing an empty stool at the bar. He ordered your favorite beer and a sandwich and took his phone out, careful not to set it on the bar in case the owner was part of some sort of association along with Penny.

He tried reading an article, but he felt as though he was being watched. Bradley tried to ignore it, fairly certain he didn't know anyone on base here, but the feeling nagged at him while he ate. The twang of music playing on the jukebox was distracting, but not distracting enough. When he finished his food and wiped his mouth with a napkin, he picked up his bottle and drained the rest of his beer while he glanced around. 

Then he saw a young woman in a flight suit playing pool not too far from his spot at the bar. Her bright blue eyes were focused on his face, and her lips curled into a grin before she bent to sink her shot. Her patches told him she originated from Virginia Beach like he did, and that her call sign was Indigo. As Bradley turned, ready to sign his bill and leave, he saw her approach out of the corner of his eye.

"Can I help you?" he asked, turning her way again with one eyebrow raised. She was attractive, even up close, and he remained silent while her gaze traveled from his face down to his chest where his name tag was displayed. Then she gasped in delight.

"Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw," she said, eyes snapping back up to meet his. "All the way from Top Gun. I've been waiting to meet you for weeks, Sir."

------------------------------

Well, I hope BG is having a nice time at home without her husband. Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls

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[cowboykento]

Omg your cowboy!kento has me strung up by my ballsack in the best way possible :) If your request inbox is open….i’d love a drunken cowboy!kento being all lovey dovey and handsy with wifey while she helps him stumble through the house and help him into bed please and thank you your highness 🙏🏼🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

ahhh!!! you’re so funny anon that made me giggle, also i loooove this request so thank u very much :3 love u lots

(i did in fact keep this sfw but minors should not be interacting with this account in general bc it is mostly nsfw so if you see this, feel free to read and then carry on pls and thx)

cowboy!nanami doesn’t go out to drink very often—if he’s going to drink, he’d much rather have a beer or a glass of wine with you and either sit on the porch or the couch, cozied up together. but every once in a while his friends will convince him to make an appearance.

you’d had a part in convincing him, as well, practically pushing him out the door and insisting that he would have much more fun once he actually got there and spent some time with his friends.

“it’d be more fun if you came with me, darlin’,” he tries as he puts his coat on, truly jealous of you curled up in bed with your book.

“i’m busy here, kento,” you raise your book for emphasis. “besides, it’s been a while since you’ve seen gojo and shoko, you’ll have fun! or at least you can probably get some free drinks out of gojo.”

he grimaces but comes over to the edge of the bed to give you a kiss, “whatever you say, sweetheart. i’ll be back by midnight. love ya.”

“stay out as late as you want, handsome. i love you too. text or call if you need anything.”

he hums confirmation before leaving you to your cozy bed and book.

you get a few texts from your husband throughout the night, just small updates or gripes about gojo that made you giggle. after a while the texts start to die down, and you assume kento’s finally loosened up a bit and is having fun.

around midnight, ever true to his word, you get another text from kento: “home soonbaby, lpve you.”

you smile at your phone—happy that kento had clearly had a good night—and shut your book to wait by the front door. it’s only ten minutes later when you see headlights turn into the driveway. you step out to the porch as kento… and gojo walk towards you.

at first glance it looked like kento was helping gojo walk, and you sighed thinking about having to clean up the guest room on such short notice, but as they stepped into the porch light, it was evident that kento was much more drunk than gojo, and he was being helped in.

before you can ask how this had happened, kento seems to recognize that he was home, and that you were waiting for him.

he looks up at you from the bottom of the porch steps, the stars shining in his eyes, “mm, hey pretty girl,” he slurs a bit, making you giggle as you step down to help.

“guess it’s been longer than our cowboy thought since he’s been out,” gojo chimes in as you slide under kento’s arm. “nanamin’s turned into a lightweight it seems.”

kento shrugs gojo away from him, standing mostly on his own but swaying against you a few times.

“thank you gojo, i’ll take care of him from here.”

“finally, he’s been begging for you since his first drink,” gojo laughs, sending you both a quick wink before heading back to the car.

you shift your attention to kento, who’s looking at you with a soft smile on his lips. (he’s been staring at you this whole time).

“let’s go inside, handsome,” you tell him, pulling him forward with you.

as you take the first step, kento pulls you back to him quickly, “can you gimme a kiss first?”

you can’t help giggling at the small pout on his lips, but you quickly oblige him, standing on your tiptoes and giving him a quick peck.

kento’s lips quickly shift into a soft smile as his thumb rubs the back of your hand. he lets you lead him inside easily now, following you almost without thinking about it as you take get him ready for bed.

you’re tempted to take a photo of him just to prove how cute he’s being—your fluffy pink headband holding his hair back while you wash his face. he’s coherent enough to help you as you take care of him, but the entire time he’s just looking at you with hearts in his eyes and the biggest smile on his lips.

you’re content with the quiet that’s settled between you, but every once in a while kento will break it to ask for another kiss. or sometimes he won’t even verbalize it, he’ll just give you a sleepy little pout and you know exactly what he means.

it’s so endearing to you to have your husband like this—he’s always sweet with you, but he’s just enthralled with you right now.

“can i have another kiss, baby?” he asks as you cuddle up next to him in bed.

you brush his pretty blonde hair out of his face and give his forehead a kiss, which makes him frown. before he can even complain, you give him another right on his lips, and you can feel him smile into it.

when you pull away there’s a look of bliss on kento’s face, “love you so much, darlin’. y’re the best thing t’ ever happen to me, y’know?”

you scratch your nails along the contours of his chest idly, “i love you too, handsome, to the moon and back.”

this time kento leans in to steal a quick kiss from you, “i love you more, pretty girl.”

normally you’d give in and playfully argue with him, but before the words escape your lips you notice that kento’s eyes have fallen shut, and his breathing has evened out.

you smile to yourself—kento may have gotten the last word, but you had the joy of spending the rest of your life with him, so really, what more could you ask for?

cowboy!kento nsfw masterlist || sfw masterlist

[jamiethebee]

Harvest

My piece for ecto-implosion 2024!

I was partnered up with @tsubaki94 who did three whole lovely artworks, so go check them out here! (x)

(The AO3 Link (X) : broken up into smaller chapters rather than this one big guy)

25,252 words

Danny rubbed his foot around in the dirt, watching the small dust cloud billow up and hang there.

“Well come on, I’ll show you where you’re staying for the next few months.”  Alicia turned around and started walking off.

“Wait!” Danny bent to pick up his bags and rushed to catch up to his aunt, “I thought that you lived in the cabin?”  He looked over at the cabin he spotted through the trees.

Alicia glanced back at Danny.  She sighed, “I do.  You don’t.”

Danny frowned.  “I won’t?  Then where will I be staying?”

Side stepping a bush, Alicia grumbled, “you’ll see.”

They moved through the brush, dodging branches and stepping around roots and detritus on the ground.  It was hot and humid and Danny was starting to feel sticky, carrying his bags with him through it all.  The birds around them quieted as they approached and then started up again once they left.  A gentle slope turned into a steeper incline and Danny quietly wondered how much longer they were going to take.  He really hoped Alicia wasn’t just taking him in a circle in some sadistic test to see how long he’d last before complaining.  Or murder him.  It wasn’t likely, but Danny didn’t know his grumpy aunt well enough to rule it out either.  Probably not though.  Maybe. 

As they made their way up, Danny smelled a change in the air.  He arched his neck around Alicia to try to see what the cause was, but quickly moved his head back and away from a sudden branch flying in his face.  Just as Danny was weighing the benefits of asking for a break, the ground leveled out, and Danny got his first glimpse of the farm.

Golden strands of wheat waved in the slight breeze, stretching farther than Danny thought he’d see.  In the distance, taller stalks formed a different swath.  Alicia stepped out of the trees and onto a path that edged the fields.  Following Alicia, Danny realized the smell had gotten stronger.  “Huh,” Danny thought.  He leaned over, closer to the stalks.  Yep, the fields were definitely the source of the smell.  Turning back to Alicia, he looked down the path and stepped next to his aunt to walk side by side.  They seemed to be close to the edge and Danny could see a couple of structures in the distance.

“These are the wheat fields,” Alicia said.  “My farm grows two kinds, spring and winter wheat.  This here is the spring wheat; it’ll be part of what you’ll be helping to take care of on the farm.”

“Oh.  What else will I be doing?”

Alicia looked down at him, “We’ll see.”

Danny winced and looked ahead again.  “Am I staying in one of those cabins ahead of us?”

Alicia huffed, “Sure will.  I’ve got a farmhand that helps out - sometimes stays in one of the cabins, sometimes travels back and forth from here to town.  You’ll be meeting him later.”

“I didn’t realize there would be anyone else here.”

“Well sure, ya think I can take care of a farm like this all by myself?  It’s a lot of work.  Course, if one of my hands didn’t leave me in the middle of the season, I wouldn’t have let Maddie send you here at all.”  Alicia looked down at him, “My farm’s no place to goof around.  We all have jobs around here and we all have to do them.”  She leveled a sharp look at Danny, “Understand?  Just because you’re my sister’s kid doesn’t mean you aren’t responsible for pulling your own weight.”

Danny looked away, “Yeah.  I get it.  Don’t worry, Mom already told me.”  More like lectured me to behave, Danny thought.

Alicia huffed.  “Well, just keep that in mind.”  They walked the rest of the way down the path in silence.

As they neared the first cabin they could hear a bark, “That’s Skip.  He usually follows me around or hangs around the animals.  Good for keeping most unwelcome visitors away.”

Danny looked out and around excitedly, “you have a dog?”

Climbing up the cabin steps to pull open the door, Alicia said “yeah, but he’s a working dog, so don’t go bothering him.”

Once Danny stepped in, Alicia followed, closing the door behind him.  Sunlight streamed in through high set windows, illuminating the space.  At one end there was a bed on a simple frame, a dresser next to it, and enough space for a chair and small table.

“This is where you’ll be staying.  Got the place to yourself, though there isn’t much to begin with.  The toilet is the outhouse in between these two cabins, unless you really want to head down to bother me for mine.”

Danny gulped, feeling a little intimated.  “Got it – outhouse.”

“Yeah well, I’ll leave you to get settled in here and then I’ll come grab you for dinner.  Most meals will be down in my cabin, since it has the kitchen.  That said, you can bring food up here, but I don’t recommend it.  Racoons and the like will try to break in if they smell it up here.”

Danny nodded, looking around.  “Anything else?”

“You’d be best to wear boots if you’ve got them starting tomorrow, but for now?  Make sure the cabin door latches correctly when you leave or it’ll swing open.  That’s a great way to invite little rodents to make their home in here or to take a shit on the floor at the least.”  Alicia looked over the cabin once, “Fer now, settle in and I’ll come get you when it’s time.”  Alicia opened the cabin door and left Danny alone with his thoughts. 

Stepping over to the bed, he set his suitcases down and sat between them.  The bed let out a soft wheeze, but otherwise stayed firm.  It was more of a cot than a proper mattress, but that didn’t faze Danny.  He was looking to get shipped back to Amity Park as soon as he could anyway.  Dust motes danced around him.  The cabin was quite small.  But at least Danny didn’t see any spiderwebs or droppings.  ‘Small mercies’ Danny thought.  Pulling out the older PDA gifted to him by Tucker, Danny tried to see if he could pick up a signal to send back to his friends.  Waving his arm in the air didn’t do much.  No signal.  Sighing, Danny put the PDA down behind the suitcases and leaned back on his hands. 

Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, he could smell the dust in the air, hear the rustling of leaves on the trees, and the faint sounds of animals.  He didn’t know why his parents thought he needed to get away from Amity Park for the second half of the summer, but Danny was annoyed.  He spent the first half of the summer trapped in summer school, and no sooner did he have the freedom to spend time with Tucker and Sam, than his parents and Jazz decided to send him off.  Between more ghosts showing up and causing problems, and his parents paying more attention to him now that Jazz was off at college, Danny had felt like he hadn’t had a moment to himself during the school year.  Any extra time he used to have was taken up by his parents dragging him into the GAV to hunt down ghosts and talk about what he planned to do after high school.  Danny had been looking forward to vegging out on the couch and running around the mall with Sam and Tucker instead of what?  Shoveling dirt?  Or watering plants?  Or whatever.  Danny wasn’t sure what would be expected from him this summer, but his mom made it clear that he was supposed to help his aunt with minimal complaint.  Danny let his arms give out so he could fall back onto the bed. 

He didn’t know what to expect here, but he knew that back in Amity the ghosts would be having a great time wreaking havoc with one less capable ghost hunter there to kick them back into the Ghost Zone.  At least Valerie had enough of a truce with Phantom now to be convinced to empty the ghosts back into the portal instead of handing them over to be subjected to the latest experiment his parents cooked up.  Danny closed his eyes.  Even thinking about what he would be returning to at the end of summer back in Amity Park was enough to exhaust him and before he knew it, he drifted off to sleep.

A short rap on the door woke Danny up, and he got up, threw a glance at his still unopened suitcases, and walked to the cabin door, pulling it open.  “Oh,” Danny said.  It wasn’t Alicia at the door like he was expecting.

“Hey, you must Alicia’s nephew?”  the mystery man asked.

“Uuuh yeah,” Danny rubbed the back of his neck trying to work out the crick that he put there by falling asleep cockeyed on the bed.  “And you are- ?”

The man laughed, “Aaah, figures that Alicia wouldn’t have told ya.  I’m here to take you to dinner, I’ll tell ya about myself on the way.”

Danny eyed the man, dressed in a button down shirt, blue jeans, boots, and a hat - he certainly looked like he worked on a farm.  Stepping out of the cabin, and making sure that the latch took, Danny walked after the guy as he led Danny to a dirt path off to the side of the cabins.  “I’m Will, no it ain’t short for nuthin.  Down this path,” he gestured, “takes you straight to tha boss’ place – and coincidentally dinner.”  Will let out a barking laugh and continued.  “I’ve been working here for a few years now.  Actually, for most of my life.  Worked here during the summers in between school for Tish and Dick back when they ran the place.  Later, when I realized city life didn’t agree with me, I came back and started working here full-time.  Alicia took over when they passed and she’s a bit gruff, but just as smart as her ma in running the place.”

“Oh, last time I was here, Alicia mentioned the women in the family being smart,” Danny said offhandedly as he looked around the woods.

Will hummed, “darn right they are, never met a smarter bunch.  The town was real glad when Alicia moved back, and I think they’re still a bit sad her sister – yer ma – never came back.”  Danny could feel Will’s gaze on him, “when were ya here last, by the way?”

“Uh,” Danny said, looking over at Will, “uuh must’ve been a year and half ago?  Roughly?  It was only a short trip.  My mom came down for Aunt Alicia’s divorce party and my sister and I dropped in to make sure my dad had my mom’s anniversary present.  That’s a bit of a long story, but we were only here for a day.”

“Aaah,” said Will, “makes sense.  I usually take a trip to the next town over to see my brother’s kids around that time.  Wouldn’t have seen ya and Alicia ain’t a big blabber if it’s not about the farm.”

Danny didn’t have much to say to that, so he looked ahead to the path, which had started curving away.  Coming around the bend, Danny could see Alicia’s cabin through the trees and realized that Alicia could have chosen to take this path up when Danny was carrying his suitcases.  His mood soured as they kept walking.  Getting to the end of the path, and out of the trees, Danny noticed a small building behind the cabin.  Maybe he could ask Alicia what it was for? 

Will walked up to the cabin door and knocked, before opening and sticking his head in, “Heya Boss, got the kid.  Anythin’ ya need help with?”

“You two better wash your hands ‘fore ya even think about touching food.”  Without turning around, she kept stirring the pot on the stove.

“Yes ma’am,” Will said, before turning around to Danny behind him, “Follow me.”  And he walked into the cabin, heading around a wall to another door inside.

Danny glanced around the cabin as he stepped in.  Nothing much had changed since the last time he was here.  He heard water running and looked back around to Will, who was washing his hands in the small bathroom sink.  Waiting for his turn, he looked around.  There was a picture or two on a table along with a radio, a small couch and chair, and a little fireplace.  But no TV.  Danny frowned, resigning himself to a very boring summer.

“Alrighty,” Will said, hanging up the towel, “your turn kid,” and he walked off around the corner to the kitchen.

Danny stepped in, noting the indoor toilet and shower that wasn’t in his cabin, and washed his hands.  By the time he got back out, Alicia and Will were outside setting down the final dishes on the wooden picnic table.

“Ah there you are Danny, we’ve got everything out here, come join us,” Alicia called him over.

Jumping down the stairs, Danny walked over to the table and took a seat next to Will.  Alicia may be his aunt, but he felt more comfortable with Will from the short walk over than he did with her.  A stack of bowls, a pot, and some bread on a plate got his attention.

Watching Alicia and Will grab bowls and dish out stew, Danny grabbed the last bowl and did so himself once the ladle was free.  Grabbing a piece of bread, he started dunking it in.  Watching Alicia and Will eat, he took a bite.  Danny made a surprised noise.

Alicia looked over to him, “Surprised?”

Danny nodded and swallowed his bite, “a lot better than I was expecting.”

Alicia laughed, “I’ll take it that my sister still ain’t much of a cook if you think that.”

Danny sheepishly laughed, “Mom’s cooking is alright.”  How could Danny explain that most of the stuff in their fridge sat next to ectoplasm and that no matter how well the containers were sealed, most of the time, the food tasted slightly off from spending time in there?  He elected to stay silent.

Alicia hummed in response as she ate another bite of stew.  The rest of dinner passed quietly, and soon the sounds of bowls being scrapped clean echoed in the little clearing. 

Alicia leaned back, waiting for Danny to finish.  Will took out a little pipe, tapping down the tobacco and lighting it.  Danny wrinkled his nose at the smell as he finished his bowl and straightened.  “That was really good Aunt Alicia,” Danny said.

Alicia grinned, sharp and wide, “glad you thought so.  Will, you can head back up, Danny here is going to help me with the dishes tonight.”

“Are ya sure?”  Will asked.

“Yea, we’ve got some things to talk about anyway,” Alicia narrowed her eyes at her nephew. 

Danny felt a chill run down his spine, unrelated to the waning light.

“Alright,” Will said, standing, “I guess I’ll be going then.  Night Alicia, night Danny.”

“Night Will,” Alicia said.

“Goodnight Will,” Danny called out as Will walked back to the path they came down.

“Well,” Alicia started, “Grab the dishes and follow me in.”  She stood up and grabbed the pot, heading back to her cabin.

Danny stood up, piled the bowls and spoons together in a neat pile, and walked in after Alicia.

“There ain’t no dishwasher in this old cabin, so we’ll be doing everything by hand.”  Alicia plugged half the sink and started the tap.  “I’ll let you rinse and dry the dishes.”  Danny set the bowls off to the side of the sink and walked around her. 

After filling up the sink sides, Alicia took the pan and started soaping it up.  “So, Danny,” Alicia started.  “Um, well, Maddie,” she cleared her throat.  “Yer ma seemed worried about you.  Anything I should know about?  Since you’ll be working on my farm and all.”

Danny shoulders inched towards his ears.  “No, nothing.  I didn’t need to get out of Amity.”  He scowled at the pot Alicia was cleaning. 

“Hmmm,” Alicia replied, methodically working around the inside.  “I never knew my sister to be a worrier, but I won’t pry.  So long as you don’t bring any strangers or trouble around it’s not really my business.”

Danny’s shoulders relaxed some as he took the pot from Alicia and rinsed it off before setting it in the dish rack to start drip drying.  The rest of the dishes passed quickly in the silence and as Danny was drying the last bowl, Alicia walked off around the corner.

Danny closed the last cupboard as Alicia came back around with a large fabric bag.  “I don’t want to keep you up for much longer, but we’ve got some housekeeping to deal with first.”  She held out the bag towards Danny.  He took it.  “First off, my cabin has the only shower.  The only rules are to not use it when I’m sleeping and to clean up after yourself.  I mean pick up your towels and hang them to dry over your cabin porch railing.  I’ve got a standing unit in the back.”  At Danny’s scrunched eyebrows, she sighed.  “A washing machine,” she strode to the cabin door.  Heading down the steps, she called back, “You saw the structure behind the cabin?”

“Uuuh, yeah,” Danny said, walking behind her.

“Well, the machine’s in there.  We don’t got a dryer, instead,” Alicia pointed up at a line stretching from her cabin to a tree.  “There’s a bag inside with clothespins.  You’ll hang up your clothes after the washer gets done.  I recommend getting up in the mornings and starting them so that they have the whole day to dry on the line.  But that’s just me.”  Turning back around she said, “well, I think that’s most everything.  I’ve got a bell I’ll ring to let y’all know when food’s ready.  I expect you to finish whatever you’re up to and to get down here when you hear that bell.  Either you’re on time or you don’t eat.  There’s too much to do around here to wait around.”  She looked down at him as the sun finished setting, the orange glow around them the last remnant of the day.  Her face softened some, “before I send you back to get some sleep, any questions?”

Danny shook his head, “Naw, laundry out back, shower inside, don’t bother you with either.  I think I’ve got it all.”

“Good.”  Alicia and Danny stood there for a moment.  “Well,” Alicia cleared her throat, “I’ll uh, see you tomorrow mornin then.  Night kid,” and turned to walk back to her cabin. 

Danny stood there for a moment before sighing and making his way back to the path.

_______

Danny woke up to knocking on the door and sunlight on his face.

Knock knock knock echoed through the cabin and Danny squished his eyelids together even tighter.  “Come on, get up boy, you don’t have time to lay around.”

Danny turned his head into his pillow and groaned.  He spent long enough last night putting away his clothes and getting used to the small cabin that he fell asleep at a time that, had he been back in Amity, would have been early and yet here was late, based on how groggy he felt.  Unrested.

Knock knock bang, “don’t think I won’t come in there kid,” Alicia warned.

Danny let out another groan before turning his head and calling out, “Alright, I’ll be out in a minute.”

Something that sounded like “too long” came from the door before footsteps started walking down the cabin steps.  Quickly getting ready – jeans, shirt, and unfortunately, FentonWorks patented hazmat boots, Danny pushed open the door, hopping a little to finish getting the second boot on.  He jumped down the stairs, making his way to Aunt Alicia, who was leaning against a tree.

“Well, 56 seconds ain’t bad kid, but come on.  You’re following me around for the day.”  She pushed off and started walking, “I assume you don’t have any experience working a farm?”

Danny shook his head, “no ma’am.”

Alicia snorted, “none of that ma’am business, call me Alice.”

“I thought your name was Alicia though?”

Opening a little gate, Alicia whistled and then beckoned Danny through before latching it, “Sure is, but yer ma and me had our Grandma Alicia, so family started calling me by Alice.”  Walking off to a small building further back, she continued, “But enough of that, we’ve got a long day.  You can ask if you have questions, but do your best to pay attention.”  With that, she opened the door to a cacophony of clucking that quickly died down.  Danny stepped in after her, and as his eyes adjusted he saw the inside of a coop.  Two rows of chicken nests on either wall, with hens either standing around Alicia or sitting.  Once they spied Danny hiding behind her though, they started squawking again and rushed forward, wings flapping and feathers fluffed.  Danny started backing away before a hand pushed on his back and a bucket was shoved into his chest.  Quickly grabbing it, Danny looked down at a bunch of seed and –

“OW!” Danny yelped as he started hopping from one foot to another, hens trying to peck away at the new intruder.

“Walk out, they’re just not used to you is all,” and Alicia shooed him out of the coop.

‘Fuck’ Danny frowned, not quite running away from the coop and wishing he could’ve used his intangibility to get away from the chickens.  Alicia laughed at him as the hens kept pace around Danny’s ankles, lunging forward to peck at him.  “How do I get them to stop?” Danny yelled.

“Jump the fence!”

Danny ran back to the gate and hopped over it with a little help from his ghost side to land a few steps away from the chickens.

Bwaack Squak Sqwauk!!

Danny looked up at Alicia who offered an unapologetic, “Sorry.  I forgot.”

Squinting at the slightly amused look on his aunt’s face, Danny scowled, “Did you do that on purpose?”

“No idea what ya mean kid.  Anyway, for now you can toss some feed in, but otherwise wait out there.  I’ll explain what I did when I get back out to you.”  Alicia grabbed a basket hanging outside the coop door and walked back inside.

Danny glared down at the chickens who were still protesting his presence.  “What.”

“Squuuuawk!” was the response back.

Danny sighed and looked down at the bucket in his hands.  It had some seeds and other things mixed in.  Looking back up at the chickens staring at him, Danny slowly raised a hand, “I’m going to throw some seeds in.  Please don’t scream at me for it,” and he reached a hand in.  No sooner did Danny close his hand around some feed, then one of the hens decided to start flapping its wings again to cause a fuss.  Danny jumped and glared at the chicken.  Out of spite, Danny reached back in and with a handful of feed, overhand chucked it into the coop yard.  Sticking his tongue out at the chickens that refused to let him out of their sight, Danny took another step back.  He couldn’t wait till his parents’ summer banishment was over and he could go back to Amity Park.

Alicia stepped out of the coop with the basket and walked over to a trough sitting in the yard.  After looking down, she gave a quick nod, and then started heading to the gate.  Where the chickens were still standing.  Glaring at Danny.

“Uuuh,” Danny said, “Do you have a plan on getting close enough to take this bucket back?”

“Sure do,” Alicia said, coming up to the gate, “step closer and hand it over.”

Eyes never leaving the chickens, Danny inched his way closer to Alicia and when he was close enough, thrust out the bucket towards her.  “Do they hate everyone?”  He asked.

Alicia took the bucket, “Nope.  Not me,” and laughing, walked back to the coop.

“Great, real reassuring,” Danny grumbled to her back.

Once Alicia finished up inside the coop, and with a basket of eggs in hand, she walked back out of the enclosure to Danny.  “Noticed how I whistled before?”  Danny nodded.  “I was warning the chickens that I was coming in.  It’s how I let them know it’s me and not a stranger.”  She grinned.  “Not that it helped you any.”

Danny looking away, glaring.

Alicia paused for a moment, “Well, no matter.”  She started walking to another log structure.  “I want you to figure out what signal you’re gonna give the chickens and start visiting them in the mornings.  Just so they get used to you.  We don’t want to upset them too much, so they need to start recognizing you.”  Walking up to the much larger barn, she opened the doors.  Danny was hit with the smell of animals and he scrunched up his nose, coughing. 

Alice looked back at him and laughed, “Well, you’ll get used to the smell soon enough.  Anyway, this is where we’ve got the rest of the animals.  Some pigs, cows, sheep - used to have a horse, but once we switched to using the tractor and truck full time, and old age killed her off, it didn’t make sense to get another.  But that was a number of years ago at this point.  I think ya mom and me were still kids then.”

Danny’s eyes finished adjusting to the inside and he saw the animals in their stalls.  The cows looked over at him, but it was one brave pig that snuffled up to Danny.  “Oh,” Danny said, crouching down.  “Cute.”  Reaching out a hand, Danny tried to pet the pig, which quickly moved away and waddled back to its stall area.

Danny caught Alicia’s smile as he stood back up.  “Pat’s rather friendly, but I wouldn’t recommend getting too attached.”  She gestured over to the far wall, “I usually open up the barn during the day, let the animals wander around.  Before that though,” she bent down to grab a stool.  “There’s some tasks to get done.” 

Alicia made her way to one of the cows and picked up a stool and a steel bucket hanging up on the post.  She turned back around to Danny, “Yer gonna learn how to milk the cows here.  We usually fill up the pail and then transfer them to bottles.  We get too much milk to use ourselves, so neighbors will come and pick up some bottles from time to time.”  She set the stool down with the pail on top, then moved to the larger cow.  Going around to the back of the stall, she unlooped a short rope and tied it around the cow’s neck.  “This old gal here is Gully.”  Alice jerked her chin to other stall, “and our younger one is Lass.”  Alicia walked back out of the stall to move the stool and bucket closer.

“What’s the rope for Aunt Alice?”  Danny asked.

“Oh,” Alice said, setting down the stool and pail at Gully’s side.  Sitting down, she said, “just to keep her in place.  Gully doesn’t move as much as Lass will, but she’s used to the rope.  Either way, it lets her know it’s her turn.  Here,” Alice beckoned Danny over.  "Now here’s how you milk a cow.”

After the early morning of getting food to the animals, collecting the eggs, and milking the cows, Alice led Danny back down to her cabin.  Going inside for a minute, Alice came out with a cup of water for Danny.  “I’m gonna check on the oatmeal and cook up a few eggs for us.  I want you to walk around the woods down here while I finish up breakfast.”

“Alright,” Danny said.  “And uuuh, I’ll hear the bell when it’s time to come back?”

Alice chuckled, “Ha - yeah, you’ll hear it.  Remember – don’t dawdle when you hear it, come straight back.”

Danny downed the cup of water in one go and nodded, setting down the now empty glass on the table. “Will do.”  Danny started walking off and he heard the creak of the cabin door.  Just as he was about to exit the clearing, Alicia yelled back, “And don’t step on my rhubarb!”

Danny walked around a bush, ducking underneath a tree limb, “Ok!” and almost ran into a large leafed plant.  He tilted his head.  Squinted. 

‘I don’t actually know what rhubarb looks like,’ he thought.  Danny shrugged and moved around it anyway.  Walking further into the woods he felt the temperature drop some as shade took over.  Standing still, Danny realized how quiet it was.  No cars, no honking, no rushing of traffic in the distance.  Instead, there was the rustle of leaves and the occasional bird call.  He breathed in and out.  Quiet, and it smelled like the earth.  He looked around.  A chipmunk scampered up a far off tree.  Danny started picking his way through the bushes, tree roots, and other obstacles as he walked further in.

Danny looked back, and not seeing anyone, did his best to walk in a circle with Alicia’s cabin in the center.  He almost tripped a few times, before remembering that he could use his intangibility to easily get through the plants without crushing any.  ‘Problem solved.  I can’t step on anything if I do this.’  Without having to pick his way in between and around foliage, Danny’s pace picked up as he walked the area.  Coming up to what he assumed was near the back side of the cabin, Danny heard a sharp piercing bell echo around.  Danny jumped.  It was much louder than he thought it would be, especially through the trees.  He started walking back, and spied Will coming in and out of view.  Danny had gone farther than he thought and hurried up.  Just before he popped out of the trees, he dropped his intangibility and walked out behind Will onto the dirt path.  “Hey Will!”  Danny greeted.

Will whipped his head around, “Oh!  Geee-zuuus kid.  Where’d you come from?”

Danny came up alongside Will, “the woods.  Alice showed me around the animals this morning, then had me walk around for a bit.”

Will nodded.  “Makes sense.  You see her rhubarb patch?”

Danny grimaced, “Uuuh maybe?”

“You don’t know what they look like, do ya?”

Danny shook his head, “Not really.”  After a moment of hesitation, Danny asked, “what do they look like?”

“Oh well, you’ll know it when you see it.  Got these big leafs on them.  Actually, she’s started a new patch of them in her actual garden.  Not hard to spot, there’s about 6 of them?  Started a year or two back to grow them in a different spot.  Real finicky things, they don’t like it down here, but I suppose Alicia likes ‘em well enough that she takes the time to baby the things.  Me personally, I don’t like ‘em all that much, wouldn’t bother putting in tha’ much effort.”  Popping out of the trees, Will waved over to Alicia, getting her attention to let them know they had arrived.

Alicia looked over, “Good – kid came back with ya.  I’ll finish hanging this line and then I’ll get food out.”  She turned back to the laundry.

Will nodded, “understood ma’am.”  He looked over and down at Danny, “We best wash our hands and start setting out dishes then.”

Getting the table set up with a small plate, bowl, and spoon for each of them, Danny grabbed the pot of oatmeal, while Will grabbed the scrambled eggs.  They got them set down in time for Alicia to round the corner from the back.  “Aah, thank you kindly boys.  Wasn’t expecting ya both to set up, but I’m grateful.”  Sitting down, she started dishing out a ladle of oatmeal for everyone and Will pushed off some eggs on each plate.  Danny waited a moment for Will and Alicia to settle down and then started eating.

After breakfast, Alice once again shooed Will off to work and had Danny help her wash and put away the dishes.  Putting the towel back on the oven handle, Alice turned to her nephew.  “Well.  We’ve got a long day ahead of us.”  She glanced around.  “Ya bring a water bottle with ya or anything?”

Danny furrowed his eyebrows, “Uh no.”  He flushed, “I forgot to grab one when packing.”

Alicia huffed, bending down to open a lower cabinet, and rummaged around before pulling out a spare canteen.  Standing up, she unscrewed the lid and looked down into it with one eye closed.  “Don’t think there’s dust or nothing in there.  Should work fine for ya.”  She passed it off to Danny and started walking out the door.  “Get it filled and I’ll see ya outside.  If you need to pee, now’s the time to do it.”  She walked out and left Danny in the cabin.  Looking around, he didn’t see anywhere other than the sink to fill up the water.  Shrugging, he got it filled up from the sink, then quickly went to the bathroom.  Looping the water bottle strap around himself, he left the cabin.  Making sure to latch it closed, he walked towards Alicia who had put on a wide brimmed hat and they started up the slope together.

“Soooo,” Danny said.  “What’re we doing today?”

Alicia chuckled, “you’ll see.  I always found it easier myself to see what someone was talking about than to just listen to someone blabber on.”

They headed back up to the animals.  Walking towards the barn, Danny squinted his eyes at the change in light as they reentered.  He put a hand to his mouth in an attempt to stifle a cough.  Alice looked over at him, eyes crinkling.  “First order of business, mucking out the stalls.  I’ll do the first one, then you’ll take over, so make sure you’re watching closely.”  Danny wrinkled his nose as he took his hand away and watched Alicia roll up a wheel barrow from the side.  She picked up a pitchfork, and as she speared the poop, started talking.

“You’re probably familiar with the poop part of this.  You want to get out all the large patties, and then go back and clean up the pissed sections.”  Alicia grunted as she lifted a large chunk into the wheelbarrow.  “It ain’t tricky, but sometimes the animals like to cover the patches, so you gotta make sure that you get all the spots.  We want them to have clean stalls when we bring them back in this evening.  Specially the cows, don’t want them to get infections or nothing.”  Alicia looked over at Danny who was looking up into the loft.

“Hey!” she called, and Danny dropped his head down to look at her.  “You got that?”

“Yes, Aunt Alice,” Danny rubbed the back of his neck. 

Alicia narrowed her eyes at him, then continued mucking out the stall.  When she finished, she handed the necessary tools over.  “Your turn kid.”

Danny flushed as he grabbed at the pitchfork, “Uh yes.”  He looked around before facing his aunt.  “What am I doing?”

Alicia stared him down.  “The next stall, boy.  Get to it.”

Danny gulped and walked to the stall next to the one Alice finished.  “So I just-“ and he mimed stabbing a poop patty.

Alicia raised an eyebrow and stared Danny down.

Turning back around, he prodded the pile.  Standing there a moment, he shifted his stance and jerked the tines into the pile.  He wiggled it in a little further.  Glancing over at the wheelbarrow, he started to crouch a little, bracing against his leg, and tried to leverage the pile up.  The pitchfork shook a little and Danny shifted a foot back to steady himself.  He shuffled around and clumsily wiggleded the poop off and into the wheelbarrow.  He looked up at Alicia.  Alicia looked back into the stall then back at Danny.  Figuring that was as good of a “go ahead” as he was going to get, he turned back into the stall and continued.  Alicia came to stand by the stall entrance and give the occasional tip as Danny rooted around looking around for spots to clean up.  Danny groaned as he finished the last spot.  Rubbing his arm, he turned toward Alicia.

As he opened his mouth, Alicia cut him off, “On to the next.”

Danny shut his mouth, glowering a little, and stepped over to the next stall in line.  By the time he finished with that one, Alicia had come back with additional stall bedding, spreading it out and filling in the bare spots.  Danny leaned against the stall divider and opened up his bottle, taking a gulp of water.  It dribbled down his chin and he wiped it off.  He hung his arms over the divider as he watched Alicia.  Her movements were smooth and practiced, and she was methodical, poking around and moving material, building it up in spots and thinning it out in others.  Alicia stepped back, shovel planted by her side.  She glanced over at Danny, not surprised to see him watching. 

“Any questions?”

Danny shook his head.

“No?  Well, I’ll leave you to the rest then,” and grinned at him, before leaning the shovel to the side and walking out of the barn.

Danny sighed and dropped his head for a moment.  It wasn’t hard to get the gist of what he had to do, but all of them?  It felt like he spent an hour just cleaning out the two he did already.  Not looking forward to the rest of the day, Danny pushed off the wall to continue.

At some point, Danny noticed something watching him from the barn door.  His shoulders tensed as he turned around.  The shape was grounded, solid in a way that most ghosts couldn’t replicate, and Danny felt his shoulders relax some.  Squinting against the bright light pouring in, he made out a fuzziness to whatever it was.  As his eyes adjusted enough to see more, Danny smiled.  It was a large dog, light in color except for the face and ears where the fur darkened.  Just as he was about to take a step to walk over, a low bark echoed throughout the barn.  Danny stopped.  The dog stood up but otherwise didn’t move, keeping eyes on him. 

“Hey,” Danny said.  “Aunt Alice said your name was Skip?”

The dog lowered its head down, staring down Danny.

Hearing footsteps coming from outside, Danny looked up.  Alice came to the entrance by Skip’s side.  “Sit,” she said.  Turning to Danny, “can you turn away from Skip a little?” 

Crouching down, she talked to Skip for a moment, before standing up and walking towards Danny.  “Alright, this is Danny.”  Coming to a stop near Danny, she clapped a hand on his shoulder.  “He’s going to be staying with us a while Skip.”

Skip stood up, turned away, and walked off.  Alice faced Danny.  “Well, that was Skip.  He isn’t the most friendly to strangers, but he’ll get used to you being around eventually.  Not that he hangs around us all that often.  Skip spends a lot of time with the chickens, sometimes the cows or pigs depending.  And you,” Alicia shook a finger at him, “will be out with the crops.  Shouldn’t run into any problems with Skip, just don’t startle him.”

Danny’s face fell, “Got it.” 

Alice looked around.  “So, you about finished in here?”

Danny ducked his head, “eeh about that.”

Alicia sighed, “Ok.  Well, once you get done with this, come find me.  I’ll be around, but if you can’t find me, just give a shout.”  She walked back out of the barn.

Danny sighed, hopes of having a dog crushed once again, and got back to work.

_____

Putting the tools back where Alicia grabbed them from, Danny walked out of the barn.  Stepping out of the shade, his hand flew up to shade his eyes from the sudden sun.  Glancing around, he didn’t see Alicia.  The woods on one side, chicken area in front, barn behind, and fields on his left.  Danny’s arms were aching, and he turned toward the woods. 

Walking through them for a while, Danny found a downed tree and sat down on it.  Head turned up to the dappled sunlight, arms stretched back, legs thrown out in front of him, he breathed deeply.  He slowly built up energy in his chest, before directing the collected ectoplasm out from his fingers, through the log, and into the surrounding area.  Nothing ectoplasmic echoed back through the connection and Danny slowed pulled it back, collecting and dispersing it back into himself.  Once confirming there were no ghosts out there, he fully settled his weight down onto his hands. 

He ignored the guilt building a home in his stomach and stayed for a few minutes, letting the sun soak into his being.  Danny was starting to get warm, bordering on hot - a foreign feeling ever since his ice core fully formed.  His eyelids fluttered closed and a soft breeze blew through, taking the edge of the heat off.  Danny could feel his heart slowing, mind growing fuzzy, and then he toppled back off the log.  His back hit the ground and the air escaped his lungs.  Wheezing softly, he stayed there for a moment.  Gathering breath back in his lungs, he tried to roll himself over.  Picking himself up, Danny did his best to brush the dirt and leaves off his backside.  Turning his attention back where he came from, he stomped his way to the farm.

Coming back up to the path around the farm, Danny spied Alicia coming up to the barn.  He started jogging faster before deciding to turn invisible and fly into the barn.  Setting down in a shaded corner, Danny turned visible and walked to the open doors.  Looking around behind him, he double checked that everything looked alright and walked out. 

Alicia was almost to the barn doors, looking back at the chickens, when Danny popped out.  “Hey!”  Danny called.  Alicia turned around to look at Danny before sending one last glance back.  Waiting for Alicia to get to the barn, Danny rocked back and forth on his heels.  His arms didn’t ache as much as when he first finished, but he could still feel the shaky weakness in them.  Danny flashed a smile at her as she got to him.

“So, how are you feeling?  Up to walking through the fields with me?”

Danny grimaced before he could stop himself. 

Alicia looked at him, “I’ll take that as a yes.”  She started walking away.

“Uh.” Danny started.  Alicia stopped.  “I – uh – what do I do with the, uuh, poop.  In the wheelbarrow?”

Alicia sighed before changing directions, walking back up and into the barn.  “I’ll show ya.  You’re gonna dump it in a pile out back.  We let it sit and age a while before using it.  Not the most glamorous, but it does the job.” 

Danny followed her in and took up the handles on the wheelbarrow.  Alicia led him out back, through the gated fence, and to a pile of poop.  Danny wrinkled his nose.  It didn’t smell as bad as he thought, but it wasn’t pleasant either.  He watched Alicia pick up a shovel that was leaning against a tree nearby, and she scooped the poop out of the small wheelbarrow and onto the pile.  In a minute she was done and set the shovel back down.

“As I said, not hard.  Get that wheelbarrow back where I grabbed it from this morning and catch up to me.  We’ve got a lot to do today.”

Danny hurried to comply and jogged to get back to Alicia who was halfway to the fields.

“Sooo,” Danny stretched out the syllable, “what’re we doing anyways?  Like the plants are all planted and stuff, right?”

Alicia scoffed at him and continued walking out to the fields.  Coming up to a large field of corn, she sharply turned left and kept walking alongside it.

Danny hopped a little on one leg to change direction and catch up.  After a few minutes of following Alicia and looking around the area – primarily at the woods in the distance, watching a bird fly up and overhead, and trying to find some shapes in the clouds – Danny sighed.  He looked over at Alicia.  Tried to find another bird to watch.  Looked back down.  Then further down at his feet.  Kicked a stray rock, causing a small dust cloud to rise up.  Alicia huffed.  Danny paused for a moment.  Started swinging his arms back and forth.  Stopped.  Started humming.  Stopped.  Shifted his weight on every step so he bobbed and swayed along more than walked.  Stopped that.  Looked back up at the clouds.  He could feel the sun warming the back of his neck as they went.

Alicia glanced over at him, causing Danny’s extraneous movements to still.  His shoulders lifted and he ducked his head down.  After another moment Alicia put her hands in her pockets.  Sighed.  “If Will wasn’t using the tractor to go around the farm today I would’ve taken you around in it.”  She leaned over to examine some of the corn stalks they passed by.  Straightening back up Alicia said to Danny, “There’s still a lot to do on the farm.  We may not be primarily livestock, but crops also require a fair bit of work.  We have to make sure they’re getting enough water, fertilize from time to time, spray for bugs and other diseases, weeding of course, making sure we don’t see signs of problems on the plants themselves, taking care of tractor maintenance – among other daily tasks.  You’ll be out in the fields mostly.  I’ll show you what needs done these first few days and then you’ll be sent off to do those tasks.  Don’t worry, I’ll let you know what to focus on, but,” Alicia shrugged, “a lot of it comes down to watching and learning the first few days.”

“Oh.”  Danny said.  “Uh, so what kinds of plants do you grow here?”  He scratched his warm neck.

Alice lifted up her hat before setting it back down, “Well, we’re a bit unusual – mostly growing feed for the livestock farms around here.  Remember when you and Jazz jumped into town last year from Air Grits?”

Danny nodded, “Yeah, that was weird; drove in this time though.”

Alice lifted her eyebrows for a moment, “Yep.  Bit of a hassle to drive into town though?”

Danny looked away, “Uuuh yea, the roads were kind of bumpy?”

Letting out a loud barking laugh, Alice said, “That’s one way to put it.  The road up here has a lot of sections through the woods too.  People here don’t drive from town to town all that often.  Makes us pretty secluded, and since there's not a lot of traffic it doesn’t make much sense to put money aside to pave a more direct route in.  Easier to just jump in from a plane for the most part.  Unless you live close that is.”

“I guess.  But what does that have to do with your farm?”  Danny wrinkled his noise as a breeze briefly brought the smell of manure his way.

“Mmm,” Alicia started.  “Well, animals need a lot of food, and the harder it is to get it brought in, the more expensive it is.  Growing up, your ma and me saw how the farmers struggled with the prices.  When I grew up, I decided to shift the family farm to silage to help with the demand.    You won’t see a lot of farms like mine, most of the food is grown outside of our region here or in other states entirely.”  She paused.  “It’s also a hell of a lot more trouble to get it to all work out if I’m honest.  There’s a reason crops aren’t grown in these parts.”

Danny nodded, looking back at the trees they passed by.

“To answer your original question, we got a field we plant cover crops in.  Depending on what we’ve got, I’ll send the cows and pigs out there during the days.  You won’t spend a lot of time there.  Then we’ve got this corn that we’re passing.  Unlike the corn we eat, this gets left to dry out after it gets done growing.”

Danny looked over the field, eyebrows pinched together.  “Corn?”

“Yessir, this is a corn field we’re walking by.  I guess for a city boy like you, it’ll be easier to tell in a few weeks.  These here are still growing their ears.  We’ve got some fields we planted earlier – they got their ears and silk already.  You’ll see them tomorrow probably.”

“Why?”  Danny interjected, “Why did you plant them like that?”

“Well,” Alice starts, “Oh, we’re coming up to the wheat here,” and pointed forward to the next field.  “We stagger our fields like that, so we stagger what time they’re ready to harvest.  It doesn’t make sense to flood the ranchers around here with a bunch of feed all at once, or to hafta store a bunch of it.  Arkansas up here in the north is a little interesting.  I started doing that a couple years back, and it’s been alright.  More work on my and Will’s end, but,” Alice shrugged.

Danny looked up at her, then tried standing on his tip toes as he walked.  He couldn’t see past the tops of the corn stalks and stumbled over an uneven patch on the ground.  Righting himself, he glanced back up at his aunt.  “So you’ve got corn and wheat, anything else?”

Alice looked down at him briefly, “Sometimes we’ll do soybeans, sometimes sorghum.  Depends.  Nothing you’ll have to worry about either way.  I think we’ll keep ya working on the wheat and corn this summer.”  Alicia looked at him from the corner of her eye.  “Speaking of, you drive yet?”

Danny choked on some spit, “Sorry?”  He cleared his throat, “I’m still a few months shy of being able to get my permit.  Eeeer,” Danny looked up her, “Why?”

“Aaah,” Alice said.  More to herself than Danny, she muttered, “No matter, I’ll have to teach ya regardless.”  She looked off in the distance before turning back to Danny.  “Today, we’re going to go around the farm.  I’ll show ya where are the different sections are and how they’re organized.”

Danny squirmed, “You don’t have to do that Aunt Alicia, I could walk around by myself.  I don’t want to take you away from your work.”

Alicia narrowed her eyes at him.  “You won’t be.  I’ve got stuff to do out in the fields anyway.”

Deflating a little under her gaze he nodded, “Okay.”

Walking out to edge of the farm, Alicia took Danny through a section of wheat, pointing out things to watch out for, checking moisture levels, and more.  Danny did his best to pay attention, but kept getting distracted by the wind brushing through the wheat.  The plants would bend and rub against one another, creating a raspy sound, like someone walking around.  After a sudden gust that caused Danny to jump, Alicia looked up at him.  She waited for Danny to settle again, then went back to what she was doing.  He could feel his shoulders tense and looked around the tops of the wheat to make sure that there really wasn’t anyone around.  Danny moved to crouch down next to his aunt. He started to lean off to one side, unbalanced on the ground, and it was only when he put out a hand to brace himself did Danny notice that his hands were balled into fists.  He slowly unclenched his left hand, the tension dissipating as he flexed it.  Turning back to Alicia, he noticed she had turned to look at him.  Danny looked back at her.  She raised an eyebrow.

At Danny’s clueless face, she rolled her eyes.  “Look over at the roots by you – do you see anything out of the ordinary?” 

Danny ears flushed pink as he turned his head to look around him. 

The rest of the afternoon passed by quickly, with Alice pulling snack bars from her overall pockets as a short break while they walked through more sections.  As they exited a corn field, Danny heard a rumbling in the distance.  After a minute or two of walking down the wider path, Alicia angled her head back, listening to something.  “Seems Will is driving the tractor back.  If he crosses near us, and has the cart hitched up, we can get a ride back.”

Danny desperately hoped that he would see Will.  He might have the occasional ghost fight and Sam as a friend, but he wasn’t fit.  After a day walking around, crouching and standing, his legs were tired, feet aching, and even his arms felt heavy.  Danny couldn’t wait to get back to his cabin and fall face first onto his bed asleep.  His stomach grumbled out.  Actually, dinner first, then sleep.  Hearing a change in the tractor rumble, Danny looked behind him and saw the tractor turn down their row.  Danny waved at Will, and Alicia turned around.  Ushering Danny to the side of the path, they let Will come to a stop, before closing the distance.

Grinning over at them, Will opened the door and told Danny, “You look dead on ya feet, kid.  Ready to get back?”

“Yes please,” Danny begged.

“Alright, then climb in.”  Will closed the door.

Danny gave a little wave and followed Alicia to the back, climbing up into the cart hitched up.

As Will got closer to the upper cabins, he let Alicia and Danny off before he went off to park the tractor and finish up some tasks.

“Well,” Alicia said, stretching out her back, “I’ve got some stuff to get in order before dinner.  If you want to call home, I’ve got a landline down in my house.  There’s not enough time to take a nap or anything, not that I’d recommend it anyway.  Or you could always take another look in the barn, see if there’s anything to muck out before the animals bed down for the night.

“Ok,” Danny said.  Alicia quickly turned and made her way down to the lower area.  Danny stood there for a minute, looking off into the woods, before making his way behind his cabin to the freestanding outhouse.

After, he ambled to his cabin.  Throwing open the door, he walked over to his bed.  He flopped down on top of it, a leg and arm hanging over the edge.  Danny wasn’t sure how much time he actually had before dinner, but he just wanted to be horizontal for a while.  His body settled down, weighing into the mattress as he tried to stop thinking.  After a while, his face got tired of being smashed into the sheets and Danny turned his head to the side, examining the little cabin.  The sunlight coming in through the windows was yellow orange and muted.  He watched the dust motes dance down the shaft of light before they disappeared into the shadows by his face.  Feeling his body relax further, his turned his attention to his wide open door.  The sounds of the woods filtered in, quiet, through it.  He heard a deep bark come from Skip from somewhere.  The sounds of a fly buzzing around his doorframe before flying off.  Birds called back and forth.  Danny sighed and felt his eyelids slide shut.  He couldn’t wait to start counting down the days until he returned to Amity Park.

When Danny could feel his heart slowing down, he quickly opened his eyes and pushed himself up.  The sudden shift started his heart beating rapidly.  Despite wanting to sleep so badly after this day, Danny did not want to miss dinner and he had a sinking feeling that his aunt would not be happy if he didn’t show up.  Not knowing how much time passed, he got up and left his cabin, making sure the latch clicked shut before he walked down to Alicia’s cabin.  Rubbing his eyes with the back of his hands, he made his way down the slope.  He didn’t call last night, despite promising his family he would.  Danny was relatively assured that his mom would’ve called Alice anyway.  More than that, Danny wanted to check in with Sam and Tucker.  As enthusiastic as his parents could be about chasing down ghosts, they were hardly reliable when it came to dealing with the ghosts in town.

He heard a steady clacking as he approached Alice’s door, and opening it, he found her in the kitchen cutting up ingredients. 

Danny looked around, then cleared his throat.  After a moment, Alice turned around to face Danny.  “What’s up?”

“Uuh, I’d like to use the phone.  If there’s still time before dinner?”

Alice gave one short nod then gestured, curving her hand around to point.  “Phone is on the other side of this wall, it’s a mounted one.  You can pull up a chair if you want.  I reckon you have enough time for a call.”

“Or two, if you’ve got a special someone,” she tacked on, laughing when Danny spluttered half formed words at her.  “Aah just kidding kid,” Alice said as she turned back around.

Danny let out a wheezy, “thanks,” before walking to the other side of the wall.  He found the aged yellow phone on the other side easily enough.  Pausing in front of it, he took a deep breath, before lifting up his hand to the receiver.  His hand rested there for a moment before he tightened his fingers and pulled the phone off, dialing the FentonWorks business number with his other hand.  Bringing the phone up to his ear, he shifted his weight, an arm coming around to wrap around himself. 

Briing brriiiing.

….

Briing Brriiing.

….

Bri – “Hello?”  A female voice answered.  “You’ve reached the FentonWorks business.  If it’s about ghosts or specters, we’re here to help.  What can we do for you today?”

Danny let out a breath at his mom’s practiced spiel.  “Hey, Mom.”

A gasp crackled through the landline, “Oh Danny!” she said in surprise.  “Oh, honey, why didn’t you call the house number?”

Danny looked up at a corner of the cabin.  “They all end up at the same place though?”

“Honey, but it’s different phones that ring – you know that.  And I’m not sure your father deleted off old voicemails from this number, so if we weren’t here to catch your phone call you wouldn’t have been able to leave a message!”

“That’s what I was hoping for,” Danny mumbled under his breath.

“What was that?  Danny, you have to –“

“IS THAT OUR DANNY BOY?!  HOW IS HE?  ENJOYING LIFE WITH YOUR OLD BAT OF AN SISTER?”  Jack’s booming voice cut through, clear enough to understand even as it crackled the closer he got to the phone.

Danny heard a rustling and a light smack on the other side.  “Jack darling, my sister is not an old bat,” she admonished.  “But yes, it’s Danny.”  A pause.  “Danny can you hold on a moment?  I’m going to put you on speaker.”

Danny’s hand crept up to the coiled cord connecting the phone to the base.

A couple of clicks, then – “Oh Danny, can you hear us?”

And a competing “Still there Danny?” coming through at the same time.

Danny winced as the phone screeched.  “Yeah,” his fingers twisted around the cord, “I’m still here.”

“Oh wonderful,” his mom said, “how are you settling in?”

“Meet any farm animals yet?” his dad asked.  A breath, then an excited “Meet any country ghosts?”

Danny sighed, his fingers twisting up more in the cord.  “I’m doing fine.  Aunt Alice explained where everything is, and I pretty much fell asleep after moving my clothes out of the suitcase.  Sorry I didn’t end up calling you last night.”

“That’s fine sweetie, your aunt gave us a short call last night to let us know you made it there alright.”

Danny hummed, hunch confirmed.  Hearing his dad take a breath in, Danny quickly tacked on, “and I haven’t seen any ghosts, Dad.  Met some cows, pigs, chickens, and the farm dog though.”

“And how is Skip doing?” Maddie asked.

Danny’s face scrunched up, “Fine?  I guess?  He didn’t like that I showed up today, just kind of stared at me for a bit before walking off.”

Maddie laughed.  “That sounds like him.  He’s nice enough when he warms up to you.  But no, he isn’t too fond of strangers.  Just give it time Danny.”

Danny huffed.

“Yes, yes, but I think he’ll be back before then Maddie,” Jack replied.

“Oh, you’re absolutely right dear.  How are –“  Danny heard distant footsteps.

“Is that Danny?” his sister’s voice called out in the distance, a whisper coming through the phone.

“YES, COME HERE JAZZ, SAY HI!” his dad yelled.

Danny untwisted his fingers from the cord before starting to wrap them up again.  “Hi Jazz,” he said.

“Oooh!  Hi Danny!  How are you doing!?”

“Alright,” he said.  “Aunt Alice was finishing dinner.  I just wanted to check in with you guys before then.”

“Ok Danny.  Well, thank you for that.  We don’t want to keep you too long then.”  Jazz’s voice turned sharp, “Do we?”

“No! No, we don’t Jazzy pants!  Don’t forget to call later!  We miss you Danny boy!  Don’t work yourself too hard, but make sure you listen to your ba-“ Jack cleared his throat, “your aunt.”

“I suppose we should let you go then Danny.  Thank you for calling us.  As nice as it was to know you were there safe, it’s even better hearing your voice.  We miss you sweetie, love you!” Maddie said.

A twin chorus of “Love you”s sounded off after her.

“Love you guys,” Danny said.  He clicked the phone back on.  Sighing, he pulled it back off after a minute.  Dialing a different number, he waited for the signal to connect.  Danny started counting, but before he could reach five, he heard it connect.

“Sam?” Danny said.

A gasp, “Danny?  Oh, I didn’t know you’d be able to call so soon!”

Danny smiled.  He heard a small voice come through, “Is that Danny?”  After a moment, a much louder, “Hey dude!  How are you?  Is it smelly there?  Did you get a signal with my Charlotte?”

“Hey Tucker, Sam.  Uuh, no Tucker, your PDA didn’t connect to anything.  Other than that, it’s fine.  I was outside, like, all day today.  My legs feely like jelly,” he grouched.

Sam clicked her tongue, “This is why you, and Tucker, should join me when I exercise!”

“You can NOT convince me to join your exercise regime,” Tucker said.

“One day,” Sam vowed, “one day you’ll join me, Tucker Foley.”

Danny laughed.  “Alright, I’m glad I reached both of you.  I’ve got some questions about our,” Danny paused for a moment, “city guests?”

“Guests?” Tucker said.  “What do you – oof.”

“Ghosts, Tucker, keep up,” Sam hissed.

“Got it, there was no need to elbow me though.”

Danny could imagine Tucker melodramatically massaging his side as Sam rolled her eyes at him.  “So?” he prompted.  “Anything to worry about?”

Tucker sighed, “dude it’s been dead around here, Poindexter was walking around campus yesterday, the Box Ghost was seen flying around the warehouses, and then today Vaaaal – the Red Huntress was chasing Skulker.”

“Skulker?” Danny snapped.

“Yeah, no need to get your pants twisted Danny,” Sam said, “it was Skulker out of his suit of all things.  No clue why he was wandering around like that.”

“It was weird seeing his naked, blobby ass Danny!”

“Eeeew, Tucker!”

“What?”

“Gross!  Anyway, Danny, despite having so many sightings the past few days, there haven’t been many problems.  Even your parents have kept the GAV destruction to a minimum.  Your dad only dented a stop sign pole and your mom only scorched some leaves while blasting at the Box Ghost.”

“Huh,” Danny said, “that’s good.  I guess?”

“Relax, dude, if any problems pop up, Sam and me have got this.  Along with Valerie.  We won’t let anything too bad happen.  And hey!  If all else fails, then your parents are always around.”

Danny snorted, “thanks, I feel so much better now.”

Sam sighed, “seriously though Danny, take it easy.  You are nowhere near Amity right now, so it’s no use worrying about it.  We have it covered and before you know it, you’ll be back.”

“Yeah, alright,” Danny said, fingers twisting in the cord again.  “Okay.  That’s – thanks for letting me know.”

“Are you okay?” Tucker asked.

Danny sighed into the receiver.  “Yeah.”  Silence stretched out between the two sides of the call.  Danny heard Alicia shuffle out of the cabin and down the steps.

“Yeah, I’m alright,” Danny said.  “I’m just.  UUuugh.  I don’t understand why my parents thought I needed to get away from Amity Park.  And my sister didn’t help, butting in with all these psychology studies about stressed teenagers, and environments, and whatnot.  Can you believe that fink convinced my parents to send me away for basically my entire break!?!  I already missed half of summer being in school, and now I’m out in the middle of nowhere?  It’s stupid.  I don’t even know why they thought the ghosts attacks were putting me on edge in the first place!  I don’t even stick around for the ghost fights as Fenton because I’m so busy running off to fight them myself,” Danny hissed.  He heard a stair creak.  He sighed, letting the tension bleed out of him.  “Anyway, how are you guys?  Enjoying your summer?”

Sam and Tucker started talking about how excited they were for a new movie that was coming out next week and Danny smiled softly, listening to their back and forth.  Hearing someone clear their throat behind him, he turned around, and lowered the phone away from his ear.

“Dinner’s gonna be done soon kiddo,” Alice said.

“Thanks,” Danny mouthed.

Finding a short break in the conversation, Danny interrupted whatever retort was coming next, “Hey, guys.  I’m glad I could catch both of you, but I got to go.  I’ll talk to you both later?”  He untangled his fingers from the cord.

“Oh,” Sam said, “Yes, of course.  Bye Danny!”

“Bye!  Talk to you later!” Tucker said.

“Bye.”  Danny clicked the phone back in place.

Collecting himself, Danny breathed out, plastered a neutral expression onto his face, and turned around to walk outside for dinner.

_______

Danny was in his bed.  He was exhausted.  His arms ached, his feet were sore, and his eyes were tired. 

He rolled over.  It was dark, likely the middle of the night, and he was groggy, limbs still heavy and heart slow from sleep.  So why was he awake?  He heard a far off call coming from the direction of the woods.  ‘Probably a wolf’, he thought.  Closing his eyes, Danny settled back down.  Or tried to.  His skin itched and Danny twisted around to rest on his other side.  Scrunched together his eyelids.  Moved his feet around.  Sighed, then pushed himself up.  Slipping on his boots, he opened up the cabin door and stepped outside. 

Looking around, Danny didn’t see anything concerning.  He stepped down and walked around the cabin, looking at the sky and the darkness in between the trees.    Danny walked back in the cabin, pulling the door till he heard the latch click, then walked to his bed.  Sitting down he took a deep breath, held it, and his eyes glowed green in the dark as he released the breath.  Ecto pooled beneath his feet and he pushed it through the ground.  He stretched out his consciousness with the ecto, making sure that there was nothing unexpected in the area.  The only thing he sensed was a small pool of ectoplasm in the ground, far enough down that it was probably undisturbed by anyone for hundreds of years.  Breathing in, he called his ecto back.  Breathed in, then out.  Followed the path of his breath through his body as it traveled.  In through the nose, down to his lungs, inflating, then back up and out.  Once he felt sufficiently centered in his body again, Danny kicked off his boots and laid back down.  Sleep claimed him quickly once more.

Sun hitting Danny’s face woke him up.  Throwing an arm over his eyes, Danny groaned.  He still felt sore from the day before, tired from the ghosts fights prior to coming to his aunt’s, and annoyed from being sent in the first place.  In short, Danny was grumpy.  The sharp rap on his door a couple minutes later did not help.

“Up and at ‘em Danny.”

“I’m up!” he called back.

Hearing footsteps recede, Danny groaned.  Loudly.  Maybe he could convince his parents to pick him up?  Call this summer trip short?  Danny started plotting ways to get back home, with his parents’ permission, as he followed Alicia back to the chickens, then off to the barn.

Neither spoke to one another, Danny doing his best to help Alice.  Before long, she had him mucking out the stalls again as she walked off to attend to other chores.  As Alice said, it wasn’t tricky and the repetition had Danny zoning out, daydreaming about being back in Amity. 

A short step back, and Danny tripped over a trough.  Hitting the ground hard, he felt something squish against his backside.  Danny sighed.  He closed his eyes, gathered some motivation, then swung his legs over the trough and fully onto the ground.  Standing up, he twisted around to see the cow pie he landed in.  Wrinkling his nose, Danny pushed intangibility through his body to get the crap to drop off his butt and walked out of the way before releasing it.  He stood there, feeling the warmth of the sun heating up the open doorway, and looked at the two stalls left to do.  Danny was just about to turn around and walk off for a little break, when his mom’s chiding voice echoed through his head.  Turning back around, he went to finish the job before the food bell rang out.

Later that day, the walkie that Alice had given Danny earlier that day crackled to life. “DANNY!  Get the first aid kit from the barn and get out to the field Will was working in.  Now.”

Click.

Danny, who had been lounging by the storage barn, darted inside to grab the kit that hung up there, and ran back out.  He activated his flight so he lifted just above the ground, and flew most of the distance to the field.  When he was close, he dropped back down and ran the rest of the way.

“Mmmm fine,” Will slurred out.

“Will Archibald Jacobson don’t you dare,” Danny heard Alice hiss out.

He darted around a row to see Will by the woodchipper, Alice holding his arm above his head.  “What happened?” Danny yelled, dashing the last few yards to them.

Will’s arm was wrapped in his overshirt, blood soaking into the fabric.  He had blood on his tank shirt and his pants.  Blood dripped down to his neck.  His face had an out of focus expression.

Danny set down the first aid kit.

Flipping it open, Alice responded, “darn idiot got distracted and forgot about the woodchipper next to him.”

“Hey!” Will protested.  “Kid, don’t listen to her, I was… safe, prom’se!  Jus’ go’ startled by this green thing – glowing like the sun – ‘n tripped ‘n fell is all.”

“Danny, press here,” Alice instructed, ignoring Will’s slurred explanation.

Danny helped Alice wrap up Will’s arm tight.  Hauling him to his feet, Alice turned around.  “Danny, I’m going to take him into town.  I’m not sure how deep that cut went, but,” she trailed off, looking at the dopey look on Will’s face.

“Got it, what do you want me to do?”

Hoisting a shoulder over her own, Alice grunted, “help me get him there.”

Danny darted under Will’s other side to support him, and they started to walk him back.  Will protested the whole way, claiming that he was fit as a fiddle and definitely didn’t need to walk into town and that they should check out ‘the weird creature in the woods, big, green, and glowing, can’t miss it’.  Danny extended some of his flight powers to Will, lightening the load on him and Alice.   They walked Will past Alice’s cabin, through a short stretch of woods, and into town.  Will finally quieted down, grumbling instead of loudly complaining, and they made it into the small clinic.

“Patty!”  Alice called out. 

A middle aged woman came out from the back door, “what’s – oh, get him into the back room.”  She propped the door open, and let them pass her, pointing them to one of the two examination rooms.  Shooing Alice and Danny back out once they set him down, Patty got to work.

Walking back out to waiting room, Danny felt sick to his stomach.  He was supposed to have gone to help Will out that afternoon, but decided to take his time and took a break near the chickens instead.  “Is he going to be ok, Aunt Alice?”

“Probably,” Alice said, but the furrows between her eyebrows told a different story.  “Well, nothing much to do in the meantime.  You been through town yet?”

Danny blinked at the sudden shift, “uh, no, not yet.”

“Then I’ll show you around real quick while we’re here, make the most of this.”

Alice took Danny around, which consisted of walking him up and down Mainline and Riverway, the two major streets of the small town.  There were only a handful of shops, the clinic, and a gas station.

“That’s it?”  Danny asked as they walked back to the clinic.

“Yep,” Alice popped the p.

“It’s…. tiny.”

Sighing, Alice said, “well yea, most folks around here stay on the farms.  You have a few homes down here near town, but most people prefer to move down to the bigger town about 50 miles from here.”

Stepping into the clinic, Danny now noticed the chime that signaled their entrance.  They settled down in two of the three seats in the front area.

A few minutes later, Patty walked back out.  “Well, Will should be fine.  It’ll take a while for his arm to heal up, but he’s still got movement and feeling, so I don’t think he’s got any nerve damage.”  She smiled at them.  “Lucky, though, that he didn’t lose too much blood.  I got him a snack and had him lay down in the meantime.  What’d he even do?  He had fat hanging out of the wound and everything.”

“Fool got distracted and the wood chipper was nearby,” Alice grumbled.

“He tripped into it,” Danny added.

“Hmm, well alright.  You guys gonna take him back up to the farm?” Patty asked.

Alice uncrossed her arms, placing her hands on her knees.  “Suppose so.  His family’s too far away to call to get him today.  I’ll see if they’ll come pick him up tomorrow.”  She sighed, running a hand through her mullet.  “Tomorrow’s Saturday, so they probably will.”

“Definitely lucked out then,” Patty said.  She walked back to check on Will.

Waiting for the “all clear” to take Will back up, Danny stewed in his thoughts.  He hadn’t exactly done anything outright wrong, but Danny knew that if he had taken his job more seriously, he would’ve been with Will and maybe he wouldn’t have gotten hurt or as badly or –

“Stop thinkin’ so loud.”

Danny jumped.  The swirl of his thoughts coming to a halt.

“I’m sorry,” Danny whispered.

“What for?”

“I –“ Danny paused.  “I –“

“Danny,” Alice cut in.  “It ain’t your fault.”

“But –“

“Nope.  Whatever ya think ya did or didn’t do, it’s not your fault.”  Alice side eyed his hunched, guilty looking form.  “Stuff like this happens – whether or not anyone else is around.  So don’t worry too much.”

Danny dropped his head down.

The silence stretched between them.  Alice looked out the window, and Danny made a promise to himself to take this summer more seriously.

__________

The next morning, Danny waved Will and his family off as they left down the back road.  He’d be gone for the next couple of weeks to keep him away from the temptation of working.  Knowing they’d have to pick up the slack, Danny and Alice hurried back to work.

_________

A week later, Danny was settling into a routine, getting comfortable around the farm.  He was getting quicker at mucking out the stalls, and as such, he had some time to do some laundry.  Taking the path down to Alice’s cabin, he passed under one of the open cabin windows.

“-addie.”

Danny stopped.  Was Alicia talking to his mom?

“Danny?”  Alicia asked.

Oh, they were talking about him.  He stood there, holding his bag of laundry, curious about what his aunt would say.

“No, he’s doing good work around the farm.”

Danny shuffled a foot around, making circles in the dirt as he listened in.

“Yeah Madds, I can see why you’re so fond of him.”  Alicia laughed in response to something Maddie said.  “That he is, you raised a good boy.”

Danny’s eyes widened.  Bugs buzzed around in the grass around him.

“Mmmm.  If he didn’t have school to get back to, I wouldn’t mind keeping him around,” Danny overheard.  Eyes widening, he decided to quickly walk off to the laundry. 

He hadn’t realized that his aunt liked him that much.  Even more surprising that she’d want to keep him on.  Danny remembered the start of summer school when his teacher all but groaned at him walking in.  Danny had just failed the second half of their class not 2 weeks before.  Due to the sudden ghost appearances, Danny hadn’t been the most reliable in the last few years.  But for someone to recognize his work?  And be satisfied with it?  Danny felt a warm feeling start in his chest.  Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to stay for the rest of the summer.

______

A couple weeks passed from that phone conversation, with Will coming back and slowly starting to pick up more work again.

Danny had, for the first time since he arrived on the farm, a short work day.  By the time lunch came around, Danny had finished his list of chores.  After getting the confirmation from Alice, he had the whole afternoon to himself.  

He walked around the farm, ending up at one of the wheat fields.  Will and Alice were focused on the corn fields for the day and wouldn’t be out this way until later.  Standing there amidst the softly swaying strands, Danny watched the sky.  The breeze in the air that moved the wheat also pushed the clouds around high above.  He decided to take a seat between the golden rows, laying on his back, arm flung behind his head.  Staring up at the clouds, he watched them flow across the sky, shifting forms as they traveled.  The sun-warmed dirt below him felt like a warm blanket on his back.  This close to the ground, it smelled sweet, a little moist and earthy.  Danny pulled his cap lower over his face as the warmth settled into his bones.  Soon enough, he was lulled off to sleep.

By the time he woke up, the sun had dipped lower in the sky.  Sitting up, Danny didn’t hear anyone around and got up.  As he walked out of the field, Danny raised his eyes, jumping a little at Skip sitting down and watching him from a distance.  Danny paused midstep.  When Skip didn’t make a move, Danny finished walking out of the wheat and onto the dirt path.  They stared at one another for a moment.  Out of view, one of the pigs grunted.  Skip blinked, and his tongue lolled out of his mouth, before he got up to walk to the pig.  Danny watched his tail wag as he left.  He chuckled softly as he headed off to Alice’s cabin. 

After dinner, he stuck around, playing a card game with Alice, Will, and Jasper.  Every so often one of the townspeople stopped by to get Alice’s opinion about something or another and stayed for a meal.  When Jasper lost the third game in a row, he called it quits and headed out for the night.  Will, Alicia, and Danny played a few more rounds themselves, Will and Danny winning a round each, with the rest of the wins going to Alice.  By the time they said their goodnights, the moon was rising.  The sky had darkened considerably and the stars were twinkling to life above them. 

“Oh.” Danny breathed, stopping on the cabin porch.

Will looked back, “Danny?”

“The sky.  I –“ he paused.  “I’ve been falling asleep so quickly I haven’t had time to really see it.”

“Oh, that all?  It’s pretty neat I guess…  Well, I’ll head up then, see ya later Danny.”

Eyes never leaving the sky, “Night Will.  See ya tomorrow.”  He walked down to sit at the table.

The door creaked open, “Oh.  Danny?  Is that you still down here?”

Danny, from the picnic table, confirmed, “Yeah.”

“Huh, I thought you and Will left a while ago.”

“Hmmhmm.  Will did, headed up already.”

“Ooook.  Well, you need anything?”

“Nope.”

“Alright,” Alice stepped down, walking up to the table.  “Well, it’s getting late.  Now, I’m not your mom, but maybe consider heading up yourself soon.”

“Ok.  Yeah, you’re right.”

“…  Ya really like those stars huh?”

Danny finally looked down, “Yeah.”  He grinned, “you can’t see the stars like this in Amity.  I mean, you can, it’s not the worst, but it’s just so clear out here!”

Alice chucked, “Sure is.  Sometimes I forget how nice it is.”

“If I lived out here, I would never take it for granted.  I bet it’s so easy to track the constellations and star movements,” Danny’s eyes lit up with the possibilities.

“Don’t know much about the stars myself but,” she shrugged, “I guess it wouldn’t be hard to, no.”

Taking one last look up at the stars, Danny got up, said goodnight to his aunt, and headed up to get ready for bed.

_______

“And Danny?  Come into my cabin for a moment, your job today is going to be a little different.”

Will frowned, “Aaah man, Danny gets to do that?”

“Do what?” Danny asked.

Alicia grinned.  “Blackberry picking.”

“Yeah, and it’s the best job of the summer,” Will grumbled.  “You better enjoy it kid.”  He stood up.  “Well, I’ll see you two later,” and he walked up the slope to get back to work.

“Bye,” Danny called.  Turning to Alicia, “So what does berry picking mean I’m doing, exactly?”  He looked around, “I haven’t noticed any berries around here.”

Alice laughed, “no you won’t.  Come inside, I have to show you where you’re going.”

Danny furrowed his eyebrows but followed her into the cabin where some maps of the farm and surrounding area and a large basket sat on the table.

Alice picked up the first map, took a look, then rifled through the pile to find one that had a large circle on it.  “Ah, here it is,” she placed it on top of the pile and pointed to the circled area.  “This is where you’re headed today.”

Danny leaned in to look over the map.  “That looks like it’s in the woods?”

“Yep,” Alicia said, “you’re going to be taking a little walk today.  I’ve got your lunch packed up, all you have to do is fill your canteen, and then head out for the day.”

Danny frowned.  “And how am I supposed to find them?”

Alice rolled her eyes, “They aren’t hard to spot.  Here,” she pointed to a different area of the map, “we are.  You’re going to head this direction,” she moved her finger up, around a small lake, and to the circle.  “It’s pretty easy walking.  The pond will keep you on track, though it’s more like a glorified puddle, but whatever.  You’ll hear the stream feeding into it, so if you do get lost, just hush up and listen.  You’ll pick the berries, put them in this basket, and when it’s full, you’ll head back.  I scoped out the area last year and this was a fairly big thicket, so even if the animals have gotten to it there should still be plenty left for you.”  She looked up at Danny.  “Got it?”

Danny worried his lip.  “I guess?”  He hadn’t really explored the surrounding area, but figured if he needed to, he could just fly up and look for the way back easily enough.

“Good.  Well, get your basket and water and get going.  I’ve got work to get to.  See you for dinner kid,” and Alicia walked out the door.

Danny took another look at the map, doing his best to memorize the path.  He sighed, picking up the basket, stopping by his cabin quickly to grab his water bottle, and started off to the trees. 

Walking into the woods, Danny noticed a strap on the basket and quickly put it over his shoulder.  The basket bobbed against his butt as he walked, but it was better than having to carry it the whole way.  As Danny got further in, the undergrowth increased.  Danny activated his intangibility and walked right through.  The sun was bouncing through the leaves, casting spots of shadow and light.  He heard the birds sitting overhead in the treetops and a beetle buzzed past Danny’s ear.  He made his way to the small lake.

As he got closer, he heard a soft bubbling sound that soon turned into a whoosh.  Then the smell of the dirt changed – rich and a little heavy on the tongue.  Danny walked through a bush and saw the puddle.  If he wasn’t intangible, he would’ve gotten his boots wet. 

Huh, Danny thought.  It really is small.

The pond was only a couple of yards across and looked shallow.

Danny looked to his left and saw the stream that fed into it.  Looking around the edge, he couldn’t find where the pond emptied.  Danny stayed there for moment, comparing what he was seeing to his memory of the map.  Once he felt confident in his orientation, he floated up and drifted across the pond.  Setting himself down on the other side, he double checked his intangibility was still activated and started walking again.  True to Alice’s word, the walk itself was easy, and Danny took the opportunity to look around at the woods.  He spotted a deer in the distance at one point, and what looked like owl nests in some of the branches. 

As he walked through a particularly dense area of bushes, he noticed some mist by a tree some distance away.  Danny squinted at it.  It was too warm in the day for there to be mist and, he looked around, it didn’t look like there was any water for it to come from either.  As he started to walk to it, Danny realized that he hadn’t heard any birds in a while.  Getting closer, he saw some wispy tendrils float out from the densest part of the mist.  He tilted his head.  Let some ectoplasm leak into his eyes.  The mist suddenly contracted and came together to form a vague squirrel shape.  Danny stopped.  Followed the smallest tendril down to the earth.  A squirrel, blood leaking out from a wound on its leg, was connected to it.  Danny looked back up.  The ghost followed the motion and looked at Danny.  Danny looked back.  Blinked.  And stepped forward, holding out a hand.  The squirrel ghost drifted forward and right before it made contact with Danny, turned to look back at its mortal body. 

Danny held his breath as he watched one of the ears tufts twitch.  The squirrel turned back around and jumped forward to touch Danny’s palm.  As it nestled into his hand, its soft, transparent body started to disperse again.  Danny reached for his core and pushed the ectoplasm circulating in his body to his hand.  His palm started glowing green before some ectoplasm coated his palm.  The squirrel started condensing again, pulsing as it made contact.  The ectoplasm flowed off Danny to mix in with the translucent body.  The ectoplasm swirled around like bubbles in soda before losing shape and being absorbed.  The squirrel’s ghost glowed bright and Danny looked away, closing his eyes. 

When he no longer saw the light through his eyelids, Danny cracked open one eye, and confirming the bright light was gone, fully opened both eyes.  What was once a misty looking squirrel ghost was now a small green blob.  As it rotated around, eyes came into view, and opening up, looked at Danny, letting out a small chirrup in greeting.  Danny smiled a little.  It was cute, if a bit sad knowing where this little blob came from.  Danny looked back at the corpse.  Then up to the blob.  The wispy tendril no longer connecting the two.  Danny let his hand drop and the blob stayed floating.  Floated closer to Danny’s face.  He could feel his eyes flash green.  The blob ghost let out another little chirp and flew around Danny head before settling down on his shoulder, nuzzling up into his chin.  Danny laughed at the ticklish sensation and then turned around to continue to the blackberry bushes.

As Danny got to the blackberries, he reached up a hand to the blob ghost.  Gently scooping it into his hand, Danny lifted it up and onto the top of one of the bushes.  Looking around and not seeing any animals, Danny focused on the bushes.  There were a lot of them, and it seemed like the bushes had plenty of berries.  Danny could make out at least 5 bushes growing into each other, and possibly more around some trees.  He knelt down and picked a blackberry, tossing it into his mouth.  As the berry burst open, juices sprayed Danny’s mouth, and he stifled a cough.  He ate it quickly and indulged in a quick cough.  Even though it was smaller than the ones they bought from the store, it was noticeably sweeter.  Danny smiled and swung his basket off his shoulder.  He started carefully plucking berries off, and every time he accidentally squished one, he popped it in his mouth instead of the basket.

At some point the little blob ghost woke up and started darting between the leaves of the berry bushes, occasionally trying to eat one.  Danny laughed at its antics, making a little ball of ectoplasm form, and tossed it for the blob to chase. 

By the time the sun started its afternoon descent, Danny had his basket filled and a happy blob ghost nestled on top of the berries.  Over the course of the afternoon, its green color had started disappearing and now it was more wisp than blob again.  Danny frowned briefly and started off to the farm.

As Danny got near to the edge of the woods, the little ghost had lost all its color and was now back to a translucent wisp.  Before he could give it more ecto, he heard a shout and ran out of the trees.  Aunt Alice had dropped a screwdriver on the ground and when she stood back up from grabbing it, she spotted Danny.  She waved, walking over to him.

“Hey Danny, how was –“ the little ghost darted out from behind Danny’s back, coming to face to face with Alicia.  She frowned.  “how was the trip?”

He pulled the basket forward, “good, there were plenty of blackberries.”

“Aaah good.  Any trouble finding them?”  She eyed the ghost out of the corner of her eye.

“Nope,” Danny paused, and taking a chance, said, “I found this little guy on the way though.”

“Oh?” Alice raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah.”  Danny rubbed the back of his neck.  “You can see it, right?”

Alice’s frown lightened.  “Yes.”  Sounding choked up, she cleared her throat.  “Yes, I can.  I didn’t realize -  well, nevermind.”  She looked at the ghost, nuzzling into Danny’s hair, mussing it up.  “I don’t know why it’s acting so friendly, but you best not encourage it.  The less attention you give it, the sooner it’ll pass on.”

Danny’s ears flushed red, “pass on?” he asked.

“Chiiiirup?” said the wispy ghost.

Alice leveled a glare at it.  “Absolutely not.”

Danny’s mouth fell open.  “Wait.  What?  Can you understand it?”

“Sure can.  Ever since I was little,” Alice answered.

“Does Mom know you can see them?  And understand them?”

Alice squinted at him, “Sure does, was the first person I told as a kid.  Real supportive of it all.”

Danny stood there for a moment.  “Mom knows?  And she didn’t have you help her with the – the ghost stuff?”

“Nope.  I was the reason she got into ghosts in the first place, but,” Alice shrugged.  “I didn’t want anything to do with them.  After I got back from the big city, I just wanted to live a quiet life and Maddie respected that.”

“Oh.”  Danny looked between the ghost now on his arm and Alice.  “Really?”

“Yep.”

The ghost floated between the two, circling Alice once before resting back on Danny.

“Well, looks like we should go deal with those blackberries.”

As Danny and Alice finished sorting the blackberries into different containers, Will walked up to them.  “Hey!  Oh, Danny’s back already?”

Alicia snorted at him, “Don’t act surprised.”

Will held up his hands, “Aaah you got me.  I saw you two meet up earlier.”  He quickly reached down to pop one in his mouth.

Alicia smacked his shoulder.  The ghost flew up and chittered angrily in his face.

Will smiled, showing off his berry splattered teeth, completely unrepentant.  Chuckling, he walked off.

Danny looked at the ghost, now flying over the piles of blackberries, and then up at Alice.  “Will didn’t react at all.”

Alice grunted, “Hmm.”

“Are we the only ones who can see this little guy?”

“Far as I can tell, kid.”

“Oh.”  Danny looked off into the tree line.  “Aunt Alice, what did you mean when you said it’d pass on?” 

“Well, exactly what I said.  Little bugger died, and whatever was left will pass on to whatever’s next.  Why?  What’d you think I meant?”

Danny shrugged.  “I guess I’m just not used to ghosts passing on?  Most of the ones I meet stick around and cause trouble.”

“Ah.  Madds has mentioned something like that.  Have they caused you any trouble?” Alice probed.

Danny grimaced.  “I guess you could say that.  A lot of ghosts cause trouble around the high school.”

Alice nodded, “I can see how that’d be distracting.”  Alice watched a bee buzz around the table.  The wispy ghost chased after it.

“Yeah, most of them like to cause problems on purpose, but sometimes there’s the little blobs that hang around and they’re kind of cute, like a stray cat.  They do make it hard to concentrate if it’s dark though.”

“What do ya mean?”

Danny looked back at his aunt.  “Cause, they, you know, glow green?”

“Green?  Huh.  None of the ghosts round here glow green.  I guess Will did mention something similar.  And I remember Maddie showing me a vial of glowing green stuff once.  Made me feel kind of sick.”

“Oh, that vial was probably ectoplasm,” Danny said.

“Ec-toe-plasm?” Alice sounded out.

“Yeah,” Danny said.  “It’s the glowing green stuff that ghosts are made up of.”

“Really?” Alice sounded unimpressed.

“Hmmhmm,” Danny hummed.  “You can kind of see their insides if they get hit with an ectoblast.  It’s all gooey looking, like a really thick liquid.  Their bodies kind of flow back in to fill the hole.”

Alice shook her head.  “I don’t know about all that.  All the ghosts I’ve seen are just misty lookin’ and real hard to see if the sun shines through them.  Well, that’s only if I catch them.  As I said, they don’t usually stick around too long.”

“Interesting.”

Alice shrugged, “I suppose.  Madds had a theory that ghosts only form when the living aren’t prepared to die or something.”  She laughed.  “Not that I think most things around here have unfinished business.  Everyone has a time and place, you know?  A rabbit lives its life knowing it’ll be eaten and all that.”

“I guess.”  Danny thought for a moment.  “I think a lot of the ghosts I know didn’t even think death was a possibility.”

The little ghost zipped under the table and around their feet.

“Perhaps.”

In the time it took for Alice and Danny to finish with the blackberries and prepare dinner, the ghost kept fading bit by bit.  Once Danny rang the dinner bell, the little ghost was completely gone.  Danny tried not to miss it, knowing it was better that the little guy passed on, rather than hang around the ecto deprived area.

____

After dishes, Alice sat Danny down.  “How you doing kid?”

“Fine?” Danny said, voice lilting up like a question.

“You sure?  You looked rather, uh, sad about that little ghost disappearing on us.”

Danny shrugged, “hmm, I guess I’m not used to it.”

“It?”

“Yeah, I’m not used to things just…. Ending.  I guess.”

“Oh, is that it?”

Danny looked off to the setting sun.

“You know, I can sympathize.  Used to be a time when I thought that I could fix anything.”

Danny looked back at her.  “What do you mean?”

“Well, you know I’m divorced right?”

“Sure, Mom visited you on the anniversary for that party last year.”

“Right, well I know it was a big celebration, but when it first happened, I was lost.  I mean, I knew that it was coming.  He didn’t like the farm, fell in love with someone who wanted the city life with him.  A real yuppie.  And yet, when I sat in the lawyer’s office, papers in front of me, there was this emptiness that seemed to take me over.  We both wanted our relationship to end, happy for it even, but, that didn’t make it easier to deal with.  Waking up and knowing that there wasn’t going to be someone by my side?  That there was no fixing it, no going back?  It’s hard to accept that some things just can’t be changed.  Don’t like talking about that even now.”

Danny’s mind flashed briefly to Dan.  His shoulders raised.  “I guess.  How did you deal with it?”

Alice hummed.  “The divorce?  Time, I suppose.  I had the support of the community here.  With death?”  She shrugged.  “I grew up.  At some point you just realize that some things have to happen and you can’t change it, so you have to accept it.”

Danny huffed out air.  “Yeah, alright.”  The variation of the age old excuse of “when you’re older” rang hollow in him.

A hand landed on his shoulder.  He turned back to his aunt.  “Danny.  I mean it.  Some things just need the perspective that time brings.  I’m still not sure my sister has quite grasped that.”  She smiled.  “No fault to her; understanding comes in its’ own time.  Worrying about it won’t help.”

Danny watched the last of the light chase the sun down with his aunt beside him, before standing and heading to his cabin to think.

An hour later, he stood up from his bed and walked down to his aunt’s cabin.  By now, the air was cool against his skin.  The cicadas were out, filling the air with a loud buzz.  Danny stopped halfway down the path, trying to collect himself.  As he stared up at the trees, his eyes burned.  Rubbing them harshly, he breathed in, the smell of dirt and the green leaves settling into his lungs.  He stayed there for a moment, collecting the resolve that started to slip away.  He let out some ectoplasm around his feet to light up his path and continued.  Exiting the trees, Alice’s cabin was lit up, warm light enveloping it like an aura.   Cozy.  Welcoming.  Danny dispelled the ectoplasm around his feet as he walked towards the cabin, each step feeling heavier than the last.  His shoulders curled forward until he stopped at the stairs up to the porch.  He heard Alice set something down inside and a creak of a door, then a click as the front doorknob rotated open.  Danny stayed at the bottom of the stairs, feeling frozen, as the door hinges creaked.  Alice’s red hair came into view first, quickly followed by the rest of her.  Catching sight of something, she raised her head to look at Danny.

“Danny, that you down there?  Everything alright?” voice soft as she stared down at him.

Danny’s body moved, skipping steps as he rushed up to Alice.  Her body swayed backward as he barreled into her, and she wrapped her arms around him to steady them both.

“I died,” Danny said, voice muffled in her shirt.

Alice didn’t say anything for a moment, squeezing Danny close.  His body shook as he cried into her shirt.  After Danny’s shaking petered out, Alice stepped backwards, hand on Danny’s back to nudge him inside.

“Take a seat on the couch, Danny.  You want tea? Hot chocolate?”

Sniffling, he wiped a hand against his nose.  “Hot chocolate please.”  He went to sit on the couch, grief and emptiness gnawing at his insides in equal measure.

The sound of boiling water soon filled the space.  A clink of a mug.  Powder being measured.  The fridge door opening and closing.  Alice walked over to the sofa, two mugs in hand.  Danny unstacked two cup coasters from the pile in the middle of the coffee table, placing them down for Alice.

Danny picked up his hot chocolate and took a sip, holding the warm mug in his hands.  Alice said, “Now, what was that about?”

The silence stretched between them as Danny stared at the wall, quiet.  By the time Alice had finished most of her cup of tea, Danny finally opened his mouth.

“When I was fourteen, I died.”  Silence followed Danny’s statement, Alice’s torso turned towards Danny, but nothing else to indicate she was listening.

Danny let out a shaky breath.  “I didn’t, come back.  All the way.”

Alice took another sip of tea.

Danny set his mug down.  Folded his hands together and set them on his legs.  “I know what it sounds like, but I’m not crazy.  I’m alive, but I’m also, somehow, a ghost?  Not like the one we saw today, but the kind I talked about, the glowing ones.  I think I turned the portal on when I went inside to look.  Not that I remember a lot of that, except for the pain,” Danny laughed, the sound hollow.  “I mean, it wasn’t working before, and after that, it was that glowing green.  It’s kind of pretty, actually?  Or maybe that’s just what I think.  It swirls around, the ectoplasm, like a really slow whirlpool, but it’s vertical like a door, not horizontal like a pool.  It makes it really easy for Mom and Dad to get more ectoplasm samples.  Actually, I gave the ghost today ectoplasm and it kind of turned into what I call a blob ghost?  By the time we made it back to the farm it was back to that wispy appearance, so, I mean, that was different.  But it was interesting, made me think of the blob ghosts back home.  You know, the ones that don’t pass on?  That’s the kind that I’m like.  A ghost.  I mean, I’m alive too, but I’m also a ghost.  I don’t know if that means I’m still dead or not?  I don’t think anyone really knows, but it’s kind of cool because I’m like the town superhe-“

“Danny,” Alice cut in.  Danny stopped.

Alice took a breath.  “Danny, do your parents know?”

Danny’s eyes widened.  He shook his head.

“Are you going to tell them?”

Danny tongue felt stuck to the roof of his mouth, throat tightening as he thought about the answer.  He settled for a small shrug.

“Alright.  Well, I can’t say this isn’t a surprise, but I won’t make you tell your mom or nothing.  Thank you for telling me.”

Danny stared at his mug, still half full.  He picked it back up.  As quiet settled around them, he felt his heart speed up.  Alice set her mug down, now empty.

“But, I don’t think,” Alice started, slow, “that it matters too much.  From what I’ve gathered, dead, alive, or something else, you’re still you.  The caring and hardworking young man that Maddie described is the same one that arrived on my farm.  Sure, you’re not perfect, and the implications of it all is damn worrying, not knowing, but that’s life.”  Alice swung her knee up onto the couch to fully turn her body to face Danny, arm braced along the backrest.  “For what it’s worth, people love you because of who you are, not what you are.  That includes your mom and dad.  Heaven knows when Maddie decides to love someone, she does it with her whole heart, no matter the circumstances.”  She tacked on a lighthearted, “and that includes your fool of a father”.

Danny laughed, rubbing his eyes of residual tears.  “Thanks, Aunt Alice.  I’ll keep that in mind.”

Danny finished off his hot chocolate, bidding his aunt a goodbye, and walking back up to his cabin, feeling lighter than he had in a while.

______

During that week, Danny started helping out even more on the farm, volunteering to lend an extra hand when needed or after his own tasks were finished.  He was getting comfortable with the flow of the days – spending mornings and evenings with the animals, afternoons in the fields, and helping out with various chores.  It was easy to fall into the rhythm and to trade playful quips with Will and Alice when they worked together.

Alice called Danny over one day.

“What’s up, Aunt Alice?”

“You know anything about machines?”

“Uuuh,” Danny’s eyebrows shot up, “I guess?  I’m familiar with my parents’ inventions.”

“Hmmm.  Why don’t you come over here then and tell me what you think.”

Danny peered his head into the propped open tractor hood, looking at the mechanics.  “It looks like the belt, here,” Danny pointed, “is wearing out.”

Alice appraised him.

Danny shifted his weight.  “Uh, was that it?” he asked nervously, feeling like he was taking a surprise pop quiz.

“Yea.  Yea, it was kid.  You familiar with engines?”

Danny made a face, “Sure?  I’ll help my dad out sometimes when there’s a problem with the GAV.”

“The GAV?”

“Oh, it’s our family car.  Or van, RV, thing?  My parents souped it up, so a lot of service shops won’t even look at it.  My dad keeps up with most of the maintenance on it and makes me help out.”

Alice nodded, “Ok, makes sense I suppose.  Well, if you’ve got a familiarity with it all, why don’t you help me replace it.  I’ve got a spare belt down in my cabin.  I’ll go grab it and you can get the tools we need.  Just look in the toolboxes around here, find the one we need for the tractor.”

Danny nodded in agreement and Alice walked off to get the part.

Later that night at dinner, Alice remarked to Will that it might be time to let Danny drive the tractor.

“Sure thing boss!  Who’s gonna teach him?”

“I will.  I’ll start him off with parking it in the barn, so tomorrow just leave it out when you’re done and I’ll walk him through it.”

Will nodded and continued eating.

“I’m what?” Danny asked.

Alice raised an eyebrow.

Danny swallowed his bite of food.  “Can I even do that?  I don’t have a learner’s permit or anything.”

From beside him, Will answered, “Don’t need one.  Most kids ‘round here start driving tractors much younger than you are.  It’s not like you’re going to be driving down the road or anything in it.”

“Oh.  You don’t need a license for it?”

“No sirree, and it ain’t that hard to do either.”

Alice piped up, “You good with that?”

“Oh.  Yeah. I guess, I just wasn’t expecting it.”

The rest of the night and next day passed calmly.  Then came Danny’s first lesson.

“When you go to park it, don’t forget to let it out of gear and apply the parking brake.  That’s about it.  So, you good to go?”

“I think so, Aunt Alice.”

“Alright, well don’t forget your ear protection, and I’ll let you get to it.”

Alice swung the door closed and stepped back from the tractor.

Danny put on the headset, and did one last review of everything, before he turned the tractor on.  Looking behind him, clocking Alice still off to the side, he carefully backed up the tractor.  Slowed down and came to a stop.  Danny turned forward again and started moving the tractor forward.  Taking a circle around, he pulled up to the storage barn and eased the tractor in.  Applying the brake and turning it off, he took off his ear protection and stepped out.

“Not bad kid, not bad.  Now help me look everything over before we head back for dinner.”

Alice walked Danny through the daily checks and maintenance on the tractor, then showed him where they kept their log.

“What it comes down to, is if you notice a problem, either stop and fix it right away, or come get me or Will if you can’t figure it out.  I’d rather you waste an hour doing that, then pushing through it and messing up the tractor on us.”

The bell rang out, clear and bright.  Alice glanced out of the barn doors.  “Well, guess it’s quitting time for ya.  Let’s get this put back and get our asses down there.”  Alice handed the binder back to Danny, who placed it back on the small table and hurried to close the doors and catch up with Alice.

Another week passed, with Danny learning how to operate the tractor, hitching up different attachments, and getting used to the daily checks. 

“I think it’s time to start harvesting the far wheat fields tomorrow.”

“Already?” Will asked.

“Yeah, it’s ready to go.”

“Huh.  Alright, if you say so boss.”

“Will I be helping with that?” Danny asked.

Alicia nodded, “you’ll be here through this first harvest, then you’ll head back to Amity after that.”

“Oh.”  Danny forgot he’d be heading back soon.  “Right.”

“So soon?” Will asked.

“Yeah, that’s what I said.  Madds reminded me that their school year starts earlier in the season.”  Alice shook her head, “seems ridiculous, but there’s nothing to be done for it.  The cities run on their own timeline.”

“Wait, then when do schools around here start?  And where’s the school?  I don’t remember seeing one when you showed me around town,” Danny asked.

“Oh, about a month later than yours I reckon.  The school isn’t on the main roads.  It’s back on one of the side roads, so the farm kids can get to it easier.”

“Used to be in the town,” Will added.  “When most of the town families moved out, the farm kids got together and convinced the adults to move it closer to them, oh, I reckon ‘bout 20 years ago?”

“Closer to 25 I think,” Alice corrected.  “I remember the big commotion when I visited from college.  Maddie, I think, organized it all.”

“Sounds like Maddie,” Will agreed.

“Mom did that?” Danny asked.

“Sure enough.  Everyone knows she’s a force of nature when she puts her mind to something.  She argued with near everyone about it.”

“Don’t know why she fought so hard for it,” Will added.  “Had to have been her senior year, didn’t even make a difference for her, considering the changes took place after she headed off to college.”

“Huh.”

“She never mentioned it to you?”

“No, not really.  But it explains where Jazz got her single-mindedness from.  She turned our annual Spirit Rally into a whole week at Casper High during her freshman year.”  Danny grimaced, “My freshman year, I got put in a diaper and thrown on stage for it.”

Will laughed and Danny scowled at him.  “Sorry, but just a diaper?”

“Are you kidding?” Alice was flabbergasted.

“Wish I was, it wasn’t funny.”

“Sorry, but you have to admit, that’s just a little funny,” Will chuckled.

“It really wasn’t.  Also, our counselor tried murdering Jazz.”

Will stopped laughing.  “What.”

“Yeah, she ended up getting, uh, jail, for it.”

Alice narrowed her eyes, “Really?”

“Yep,” Danny said, “last year wasn’t so bad though.  Hardly anyone called me a baby the whole week.”

“Damn.”

“What the hell is happening in those cities.”

The sudden somber shift made the conversation die down and dinner was finished quickly after.

The next morning, the bell rang out clear and sharp.  Danny blinked his eyes open, noticing it was still dark out.  Stumbling out of his cabin, he turned to Will, who was passing by.  “Why’re we up so early?” Danny yawned, pulling on a long sleeved shirt.

Will returned his yawn, jaw cracking in the early morning air.  “Oh, we do most of our harvesting in the morning or evening.  Means real early mornings the next few days.  S’not so bad, once you get used to it.”

“Mmm.” Danny responded, following Will downhill.

“Hey Alice.  You got the coffee brewing?”

“Hey, boys.  Sure do.  Another couple minutes or so, then we can get started.”

After getting their coffee in thermoses, the group headed up to the fields.  Danny was put on tractor duty.  Alice took over the truck with a wagon attached and Will was in charge of the forage harvester.  With the exception of taking care of the animals, Danny and Alice traded back and forth on filling up their collection wagons and running them to the silo.

Soon enough, the harvest passed and it was time for Danny to return to Amity Park.

“Yep, got it sis.”  A pause.  “Uh huh.” 

“No, no need, I’ll take him myself.”

“Of course I do.”

“No, it’ll be fine.  A short trip up.”

“Will can do what needs to be done.”

“Yes I’m sure.”

“Uh huh.  See ya then.”

“Take care Maddie.”  Alicia put down the phone and turned to Danny, seemingly unsurprised to see him leaning against the wall.  “Well, I’ll be driving you back up to Amity in a few days.”

Danny nodded, not looking particularly taken back, despite the fact that his aunt hadn’t gone up to Amity in the past 10 years or so.

The corners of Alice’s mouth turned up, “alright then, make sure you’re ready.  It’ll take a couple days, since you can’t help with driving, but it should be a nice enough trip.”

“Anything to do before then?”

“Nope, the only thing left to do is to check on the truck.  As much of a help as you’ve been with the tractor, I’ll be doing that.  You just make sure you help out Will with any odd jobs before then.”  Alice scratched the back of her neck.  “Uuh, ya excited to be heading back?”

Danny shrugged his shoulders.  “I guess.”  He looked out the kitchen window, “I’ll miss being here though.  I know I caused some trouble when I first got here, but it grew on me.”  Danny smiled softly.

“It has a way of doing that,” Alice agreed.  “Well, let’s get back to work then.  It doesn’t stop for rain nor shine.”

Danny finished loading up his bags in the short backseat and closed the back door.  Hauling himself into the front passenger seat, he closed the front door.

“Got everything squared away?”

“Yep.  Double checked and everything.”  Turning to grin at her, “but if I forgot anything, that just means I’ll have to come back.”

Alice laughed and shifted the gear to start the truck rumbling down the path.  Soon enough, bouncing along the road, a dust cloud behind them, the farm was swallowed up by trees. 

The journey itself was uneventful.  The mountains turning to valleys turning to farms turning to small cities and large ones, a one night stop at a motel, then back on the road, and finally Danny recognized the outskirts of Elmerton in the distance.  He could feel the rumbling of something in his stomach, and it solidified into a nervous ball when they crossed the town limits. 

Elmerton had enough tall buildings that Danny couldn’t see over into Amity Park, but he could feel the flow of ambient ectoplasm moving about like chem trails, signifying the presence of a visiting ghost.  Next to him, Alice clutched the steering wheel hard enough to turn her knuckles white.  Coming to a red light, she glanced over at Danny and noticed his pinched eyebrows, eyes on her hands.  She sighed softly, relaxing her hands and hitting the accelerator when the light turned.  The sun filtered through the buildings, casting long lines of shadow that waved over the truck passing through.  Danny turned to look out the window, head in hand, braced against the door.  It was quiet, no ghostly interference on this side of town.  Nevertheless, he could feel the ectoplasm that floated in Amity’s air reach out tendrils in Danny’s direction.  Welcoming him home, beckoning him closer, wanting to wrap him up in its embrace.  He shuddered.  After getting used to a non-ecto infused environment, the not quite alive reaction of the ectoplasm felt like a slimy slick hand on his shoulder, slipping off before trying to embrace him again.  He didn’t notice Alice next to him, her breathing becoming shallow and quick.

As the truck crossed over the interstate separating the two cities, Danny shuddered, feeling the sharp contrast of a decidedly unhaunted city to one that almost had more ghostly visitors than alive ones.  He could feel the boundary like he was pulled through a film, the ectoplasmic residue clinging to his skin on the other side, settling back into his nose and lungs, coating the back of his throat and cooling his hands.  It wasn’t enough that someone like Valerie – fully human - would notice, but being so attuned to the presence of ectoplasm as a being shaped by it, Danny could feel it like a physical weight, bearing down heavier on him the closer they sped to FentonWorks.  Alice’s hands lightly shook as she clasped the stick to shift down.

Pulling up to the side of FentonWorks, Alice stopped the car.  They both sat there for a moment, breathing in the quiet of the street, before a far-off blaster shot echoed in the distance.  Danny turned to Alice, a wobbly smile on his face, “home sweet home,” he said, punctuating it with a little laugh. 

Alice looked past him to the door, then back to Danny.  “I suppose so,” mouth set in a thin line.

Danny turned away, not wanting to parse what Alicia was feeling, and unclicked his seat belt.  He opened the door to slide out of the truck.  Alice followed him out and walked around to knock on the front door.  As her first rap against the door ended, weapons sprung out of the sides of the walls, focused down on her.  Alice jumped back a little as a light popped out of the door, scanning Alice from head to toe.  “Freaky,” she muttered darkly as something dinged and the door clicked open, the differential air pressure opening it further.  Alice turned back around to Danny, “What was that?”

Danny shrugged, “It seems Mom and Dad added some things while I was away.”

Alice gaped at Danny.  “Added some things?  What was it like before?”

Popping open the back door to grab his bags Danny said over his shoulder, “Oh, the weapons have been there since the first house defense upgrade, but the unlocking is new.”

Alice looked back to the door.  “That’s the new part?”  She hesitantly reached a hand out and tapped the door hard enough to swing it open the rest of the way.  She leaned forward a little.  “Uuuh,” she started, peering in.  Clearing her throat, she spoke up, “Anyone home?  I’ve got your boy back Maddie!”

Danny walked up beside her.  “I wouldn’t wait for an answer Aunt Alice.  It’s best to just walk in and take a seat.”  Danny did so himself, setting his bags next to the stairs and walking back to the truck.  Alice walked in, tentatively lowering herself down to the couch, and looked around wide eyed.

“Just what in the world has my sister been up to?” she said mostly to herself.

The slamming of a door and a loud beep sounded out as the truck was closed and locked.  Danny walked in with Alice’s bag and closed the door behind him.  “Seen anyone yet?”  he asked.

Alice swung her head around to stare at Danny, “No, not yet.”  She gestured around at the living room, a myriad of objects on the table, hung on the wall, or thrown onto a shelf.  “Danny, what is all this?”

Danny barely glanced down before making his way to the kitchen, “probably broken ghost inventions.  I wouldn’t touch any of them though, they can be a bit, well, temperamental.”

The sound of a cabinet door squeaking open, running water, and Danny came back with a water glass for himself and Alice.  “Here ya go,” he said, holding one of them out.

Alice absently took the glass and sipped from it.  Choking and spluttering, she set the glass down on the coffee table, slapping a hand against her leg.  She collected herself, wheezing, and looked up as green light tinted her peripheral vision.

“Oh Alice!  And Danny!!  I didn’t hear you two come in,” Maddie said after exiting the downstairs lab.  She quickly went over and swept Danny up into a big hug.  “Oh, I missed my sweet little baby boy.”  Giving Danny one last squeeze, she stepped over to Alice to do the same.

A clang could be heard, echoing up the lab stairs and then some thumps as Jack made his way up.  Danny set his glass down in anticipation.  No sooner did Jack realize Danny was home than he rushed over, knocking over a chair in the process, scooping Danny up into a bone crushing hug.  “DANNY BOY!” was shouted right into his ear.

Danny did his best to move his wrists enough to pat his dad back.  “Hey Dad.  Just got back.”  He paused and with no indication that Jack was going to let go anytime soon, “Can you let me go now?  It’s hard to breathe.”

Jack, embarrassed, let him go, giving him a firm pat on the back, “Sorry about that, I was just so excited to see you back home!  JAAAAAZZIE-PANTS!”  He called out.

Alice clasped a hand to her ear, scowling as Maddie looked on fondly.  “Oh honey, no need to yell like that.”  She turned to face her sister.  “It’s so good to see you here Alice.  I don’t remember the last time you visited and things have changed so much since then.  Jazz was just toddling around and we still had the play pen set up for Danny.”  Taking a seat, she pulled on Alice’s sleeve, inviting her to sit next to her.  “I missed you,” Maddie said.

Alice coughed and looked around the room, “I missed you too Maddie.  If you ever want to visit the farm more often, you could.”

Maddie laughed and waved her hand around, “Oh our work keeps us so busy nowadays.  Speaking of, I hope you didn’t run into any ghosts on your drive in?” Eyes twinkling, Maddie waited for the answer.

Alice frowned at her, “No, we didn’t,” and watched as her eyes dimmed a little.

“Aah well, that’s alright, I’m glad you two made the trip up here safely.  Speaking of, I was thinking we could all head out for dinner tonight?  I know it’s not often you’re in the city, so it might be nice.”

Jack leaned down to Danny and whispered conspiratorially, “We had an ecto sample explode in the fridge.  All the food is completely inedible, but wouldn’t you know it?  The old chicken and hot dogs started a little kingdom in there.  Fascinating stuff Danny.  Really.”  He looked over at him, “Would you like to meet them?”

Danny grimaced more than smiled, “Uuuh no thanks Dad.  I think I want to get started unpacking instead.”

Slapping a hand to his forehead, “That’s right!  I won’t keep you Danny.  Go take your bags up to your room, we’ll visit with your aunt down here.”

A boom echoed through the neighborhood and Maddie jumped, starting to reach a hand for her blaster before relaxing, continuing the conversation she was having with Alice.  Danny stopped briefly to grab his bags and headed up the stairs towards his room.  As he reached the top, Jazz’s door clicked open and she stepped out. 

“Danny!  You’re back!” she said.  Stepping forward, she wrapped Danny up in a hug, chin poking into his head as she said, “I missed you little brother.”

Danny awkwardly stood there holding his bags, “Missed you too Jazz.”  He swayed a bag a little to knock into her leg.

“Oh!” she said, releasing him, “Sorry, I’ll let you get to your room.”  Smiling at Danny for a moment, Jazz started down the stairs. 

As Danny kicked his door open, he heard Jazz greet their aunt.  Dropping his bags down in front of his dresser, he jumped up onto his bed.  “Uuuuuuuugh,” the groan rumbling throughout his chest.  He breathed out, then rolled over onto his back, arms flung out and over the sides of his bed.  Danny stared up at the glow in the dark stars, stuck on his ceiling years ago.  He had barely been gone for a couple months, but already his room felt slightly foreign - like returning somewhere he didn’t fit into anymore.  It was like an old sweater you found again after a few years.  Slipping it on and knowing every seam, texture, and fold as it settles around you, but no longer the same comforting weight – a little too thin, worn at the elbows and a hem starting to unstitch itself.  Not as soft as you wanted to remember.  Exactly the same, but time having polished away the fondness that once endeared it to you.

Danny rolled over onto his side, staring into his closet.  The sliding door left cracked open from when Danny slammed it shut, the recoil pushing it back open before he left.  He heard the cadence of a conversation float up the stairs and he closed his eyes.

Waking up to someone shaking his shoulder, he blinked awake.  His room had darkened with the setting of the sun and Danny felt groggy.  “MmMMMmm?” he hummed.

“Danny, we’re going to head out to the Nasty Burger for dinner.  You gonna get up and come with?”

Danny bolted up, smacking his head into Jazz’s hand still hovering above him.  “Up!  I’m up!” he said.

Jazz chuckled, “See you downstairs,” and left his room.

Danny braced himself on his arms, letting the thrum of his heart settle back down from the adrenaline rush.  After a moment he swung his legs down.  A quick detour to the second floor bathroom later and Danny joined everyone else downstairs. 

“Alright, now that we’ve got everyone here – to the GAV!” Jack announced.

Danny sleepily followed Jazz out to the garage and clambered into his seat.  Alice, who was following Danny, stopped at the open door.  Looking around the retrofitted RV, she hummed and side-eyed Jack who had turned the key in the GAV, prompting the consol to light up in a variety of buttons and gauges.  She stepped into the back and climbed into one of the open seats.  Maddie closed the door behind Alice and got herself into the passenger seat.  After clicking her seatbelt in and checking that the kids had as well, she pushed a button, the garage doors clanking open behind them.  Jack flipped on the headlights and backed out of the garage.

“Hold on,” Danny hissed up to Alice, who in turn, grabbed onto the hold bar at the top of the door. 

Once Jack cleared the sidewalk and safely backed onto the street, he stepped on the gas and catapulted the GAV down the street, careening around corners, and speeding through yellow lights till they swayed to a halt in the Nasty Burger parking spot.  Jazz sighed, Danny let out his breath, and Alice looked a little green.  “ Does your husband always drive like that Maddie?”

Maddie turned around, unclicking her seatbelt, “Like what, Alice?”

Alice eyed Jack nervously before looking back at her sister, “Uuuuh.  Nevermind Maddie.  Let’s go,” and she opened up the sliding door to shakily step out.

The Fentons and Alice went into the Nasty Burger, quickly ordering food and sitting down at a booth.  The chatter of the restaurant was pleasant, if a little overwhelming to Danny.  He decided to listen to his family’s conversation and looked out the window.  As Alice asked after Jazz’s college adventures, Danny saw a bright blast light up the sky.  He blinked and took a moment to process as a streak slithered through the air.  A ghost!  He turned around, nudged Jazz out of the booth, and slid out with a halfhearted excuse about the bathroom before making his exit.  Hiding behind the dumpster, Danny transformed and flew off after the ghost that he could still see winding around the tops of buildings.  The trusty Fenton thermos clattered against his leg as the wind whipped Danny’s hair into his face.  Coming up to a stop, he watched the ghost slow down over the park, then dive down.  Danny pushed himself into action, darting into the tree tops to see where it went.  He heard the whine of a blaster charge up below him and Danny looked down.  Tucker stood there, a small blaster leveled at the backside of the ghost.  Danny flew up towards the sky and starting arcing down the other side.  Before he could do much, Sam ran out from the other side of the trees shooting at the ghost.  A low hum joined the chorus of weapons and Danny turned invisible as the Red Huntress caught up to the ghost. 

Danny drifted up higher, watching the teamwork between the three of them.  They quickly captured the ghost.  He lazily drifted down to the trio.

“Huh, didn’t know you guys would team up,” Danny said, turning visible.

Tucker flinched and the girls rolled their eyes.

“Hey Danny,” Sam greeted.

Valerie retracted her helmet and stared at Phantom for a moment before, “Hi, Danny.”

Danny’s eyebrows flew up, pinched together.

Tucker laughed at his expression as it quickly morphed into a look of betrayal aimed at Sam and Tucker.

“Sorry Danny,” Sam looked away.  “Val kind of… figured it out?”

“Sam!” Danny hissed, voice crackling like steam.  “What does that mean?”  His eyes darted back to Valerie, who just stood there, looking conflicted.

“Exactly what I said Danny!”

Danny shifted so he could stand on the ground.  “But how?”  He was starting to get angry at the lack of answers.  It hadn’t even been two months and without being around Valerie somehow pieced together his biggest secret?

Tucker’s laughter died down.

“It’s – Danny please don’t be mad,” Valerie spoke up.  Her eyes darted around the clearing before landing back on Danny.  “When Phantom disappeared after Fenton left it wasn’t hard to figure out you two were connected somehow.  And then Dani stopped by in town and-“

“Dani came back?” Danny interrupted.  He glowered at Sam and Tucker, eyes glowing brighter for a moment.

“It wasn’t a big deal!” Tucker tried to defend.

“Yeah!” Sam chimed in.  “She was here for like, a day?  Maybe?  Hardly worth mentioning.  She spent most of it playing pranks on Vlad.”

“And Valerie met up with her?  But not me?”  Danny voice raised in pitch, “I missed seeing my cousin and you didn’t say a word?!?  I thought I wouldn’t have had to tell you two that Dani coming back would be something important to mention.”

Tucker’s shoulders crept up to his ears.

Sam rolled her eyes.  “Really, Danny, it is so not a big deal.  We didn’t even know for most of that day.  She only came to see us towards the end of her stop.”

Danny’s core felt a sting go through it.

“Did she know I was coming back?”

“Yeah dude, we mentioned you were sent to your aunt’s farm.  She asked about you!  Promise!  Once she realized that, she told us she’d try to stop by to see you.  Seemed really excited to check out a farm.”

“Although,” Sam chimed in, “I don’t think she realized you’d be back so soon?  If you never saw her, she probably got distracted by something on her way.”  Seeing Danny’s sad expression, Sam said, “I’m sure she’ll be back to visit you, Danny.  She did say she’d stop by at least a few times a year to check in, right?”

Danny sighed.  “Yeah.  I’m just bummed that I missed her.  And with no way to get into contact with her,” he trailed off.

“Actually,” Valerie started, “Uhm, I gave her a little, well, kind of like a cell phone?  It can make calls, but it’s also got a little button to send a distress signal to my suit if need be?  And seeing as it’s never gone off, Dani’s okay.  Ok, Danny?”

Danny looked down at the ground.  “Alright.  I guess that’s better.”  He looked preoccupied - lost in thought and still a little sullen.

Sam, Tucker, and Valerie exchanged glances with one another over Danny’s bowed head.

Valerie gave a little cough.  Seeing Danny head twitch at that, she said, “I saw Dani transform after one of her pranks.  I was stopping by Vlad’s office to see if I could find anything new.”  Valerie paused.  “She looks a lot like you Danny.  And once I saw that, and my suit recognized her like any other human, I approached her.  She explained a lot to me and after getting lunch, I brought her around to Sam and Tucker.”

Danny looked up at his best friends.  “Really?  Valerie had to bring Dani to you guys?”

Sam nodded and watched Danny’s expression lift at the confirmation.

“Anyway, Sam didn’t tell me anything, but Tucker told me about the whole,” she waved her hands around, “Cujo?  The ghost dog thing.”  She sighed.  “It wasn’t easy to sort through it all, but I realized that I was being really unfair to you Danny.  I’m sorry for not hearing you out about it earlier.”

Danny shifted his weight from one foot to the other.  “Oh, well.  That’s?  Ok?  I mean it’s not okay okay, but I understand.  Why you acted like you did.  Life dealt you a really bad hand with everything and you were dealing with a lot with your dad and his job and the A Listers and everything so – “ a hand settled on his shoulder.

“Danny,” Valerie cut in.  “You don’t to forgive me right away.  I’ve had a few weeks to deal with this.  I just wanted you to know that I know about your … situation and that we – Red Huntress and Phantom – are cool now.”  A bell tolled somewhere in the town.  Valerie looked up at the street lamps turning on.  “Anyway, I’ve got to get back, but it was nice to see you Danny.”  She gave him a little smile, activated her hoverboard and helmet, and flew off.

Watching Valerie fly off, all three of them stood still for a moment.

“Well,” Danny started, “I’ve got to get back.”

As he started moving to walk off, Sam grabbed his arm, “Are you mad at us?”

Danny turned around.  “No, Sam.  I’m not.  I just – I’ve had a long day and I want to go eat dinner.  Can we get talk about this tomorrow?”

“Promise?  I’ve got a new game I can bring over to play,” Tucker offered.

Danny smiled at them, “That sounds good.  I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”

Danny started walking backwards and turned invisible from one step to the next.  He flipped up into the air and flew off, back to the Nasty Burger.  He transformed in a stall, washed his hands, and walked out to the booth.  As everyone turned to look at him, Danny’s neck flushed red.  “Hi.”

“You doing alright Danny?” Jack asked.

“Uuuh yeah, just,” Danny paused, “had to take a dump?”  He slid into the booth, Jazz pushing over his tray of food.

“If you say so m’boy.” Jack shoved more fries into his mouth.

Jazz scolded her father for his manners and Maddie smiled fondly at her eldest.

Danny inhaled a third of his burger and as he took a sip of pop, looked over at his aunt.  Alice had a smile on her face, but it was stretched a little thin, eyes crinkling right underneath them, a fist on the table and body turned, supported by the window and booth back.  Danny went back to eating his burger.  Aunt Alice had looked like she was in pain that she was trying to hide ever since they entered Amity Park’s borders earlier.  He hoped she would be fine considering Maddie had wrangled her into staying for a couple days.  Danny ended up ordering another burger and Jazz decided to split a small shake with Maddie.  Once they had finished eating, they climbed back into the GAV and headed home.  Danny started feeling sleepy again, leaning his head on the cool window, watching the streetlights pass by.  Jazz looked over at her brother, noticing how relaxed he looked.  She missed him.

“You know Danny,” she started, “you look so much more relaxed than before.”

Danny glanced over at her.  “I’m not giving you the satisfaction of saying you were right.”

Jazz smiled softly as Danny’s head rolled back against the window.  “I wouldn’t expect anything else little brother,” she whispered.

___

Danny heard the clicks and whine of the Fenton door weapons activate and after a few seconds, the doorbell rang out.  He left his room, heading down the stairs to hear his mom invite Sam and Tucker in.

“Hey guys,” he called down the half flight of stairs.  He waited for them to start walking up before he turned around and led them to his room.

Pushing open his door, he dropped onto his chair.  Tucker grabbed a spot on his bed and Sam, after closing the door, took a spot at the foot of the bed.

“So,” Sam started.

“So,” Tucker added.

“Soooo,” Danny finished, “any thing else I should really know that you didn’t bother to update me on?”

Tucker winced at Danny’s tone.

“Nope,” Sam popped the p.  “Vlad’s still mayor,” she ticked up a finger.  “No new halfas that we know of, no new ghosts.”

“Oh!” Tucker interjected.  “Dash had a wipe out on a skateboard.”  He looked smug, “I caught it on video, wanna see?”

“Yes!” Danny cheered, leaning forward to watch.

Sam scoffed at them, but she also leaned in.

After catching up on all the little things Danny missed over the summer – a new girl moved in next to Tucker, Sam’s petitions and protests, teaming up with Valerie – Danny stood up and stretched.  His spine let out a loud crack and Tucker gaped at him.

“Geez, are you okay?  What were you even doing on that farm?”

“Yeah Danny, you sounded like my Bubeleh and she’s, like, 80.”

Danny laughed, sitting back down.  “Actually, I think that was because I’ve been sitting so much the past few days.  I was pretty active before that.”  He thought for a moment.  “I might be able to beat Dash in a race now.”

Tucker snorted, “I don’t know dude, he decided to start working on his legs this summer.  He’s no longer, like, a Dorito with sticks for legs.”

Sam definitely didn’t giggle as she said, “But sure, we’ll take your word for it, Danny.”

Danny rolled his eyes as he sat back in the chair.  “Alright, enough teasing me.”

“Yeah, let’s talk about Sam ditching our elective class to take environmental sciences.  Can you believe she disrupted our carefully crafted schedule that ensured we shared as many classes as possible just for?  What was it?  The earth?  Can you believe Same is ditching us like this?”

“Huh,” Danny said, he turned to Sam, “what’s that class even about.”

Sam glared over at Tucker before looking at Danny, “I’m glad someone here is taking an interest in the important things in life.”  Sam launched into an hour long explanation.  After the first five minutes, Tucker had pulled out his PDA to play a game, mouthing along to parts of Sam’s explanation from time to time.  Danny got the basic idea shortly after that.  He started to tune out, thinking about school.  How in 2 short weeks, he’d be back in the classroom, probably juggling ghost attacks, Dash, the other A Listers, homework, and sitting in a cramped chair for hours on end.  The sun coming through his window warmed Danny’s side.  He glanced outside at the street.  A bird flew across, but otherwise it was buildings, sidewalk, and asphalt as far as he could see.  No green at all.  He wondered if Undergrowth would make another appearance, and if Danny could convince him to –

“Danny, are you even listening to me?” Sam’s sharp voice called out.

Danny whipped his head away from the window, “Uh, yeah, Sam, I’m listening.  You were saying something about,” he searched his short term memory, “the climate?”

Sam huffed and crossed her arms, “So, as I was saying – “

“As she was saying,” Tucker interrupted.  “She’s shamelessly ditching us, Danny.  Can you believe it?” Tucker slid dramatically off the bed and grabbed Danny’s jeans, “and Sam doesn’t even care!” he cried.

“Tucker, you know that’s not it,” Sam reprimanded.  “Besides, didn’t you sign up for Advanced Algebra or Calculus or something?  You’re also ditching us.”

Turning around to face her, Tucker gasped.  “How. Dare. You.  It’s Finite/Brief Calculus and that’s only because they refused to put me in the computer class again this year.”

Danny laughed, “That’s because you hacked the school’s computers and played that banana song over the intercom for all of lunch.

“Because peanut butter jelly time is a classic,” Tucker grumbled.  He got up, sitting back on the bed.  “Anyway, you should have your schedule by now too.  Have you looked at it?”

Danny rubbed the back of his neck, “eh?  I think my parents handed it to me this morning, but I didn’t take a look.”

“Oh, well then what are you waiting for?  Let’s see it!  I want to see how many classes we share this year!”  Sam demanded.

Danny sat up in his chair and rolled over to his desk.  Grabbing the school letter, he opened it, gave the schedule a once over, and then surrendered it to his friends.  Sam grabbed the paper and her and Tucker leaned over it.

“It looks like we share PE again Danny,” Tucker held up his hand for a high five as he continued looking at the schedule.

“We all share chemistry this year, right before lunch,” Sam added.

“Oh nice.  And look – we end the day together in art too,” Tucker pointed with his other hand.  Sam and Tucker looked over at Danny.  “Dude?”

Danny stared past them, eyes not focusing on anything.  When Tucker waved his hand in front of his face, he jolted back to focus and gave a half hearted smile as he high fived Tuck.  “Yeah, that’s great.”

Sam narrowed her eyes at Danny, “that doesn’t sound very enthusiastic.  Are you not excited for this year Danny?”

A shrug was her answer.  “I don’t know.”

Tucker glanced over at Sam, “What do you mean?  When you finished summer school, you seemed pretty thrilled to finalize your schedule request and send it in.”

Danny looked out the window, “Yeah, I know.  And I was.”

“Was?” Sam echoed.

“Well, this summer on the farm was a lot different.  I liked it, being outside and stuff.  Working on things, knowing that I was making a difference for people.”

“Danny,” Tucker started. “Do you not want to be in Amity anymore?”

Danny whipped his head to stare at Tucker, “Oh course I want to be here!  I missed you guys so much!  And I missed a lot of other stuff too!”

“Danny.”  Sam waited until he looked at her.  “You can have missed us, and not want be in Amity Park.”

Danny dropped his gaze to the carpet between their feet.  “Yeah, I know that.  I do want to be here.  I do!” 

He fell silent, struggling for a moment.

“I just – it’s so much, you know?  The ghosts, and Dash, and school, and my parents, and all of it.  It’s so much, all the time, without a break.  And I don’t feel like I have a choice in any of it either.  Obviously I can’t skip school and I can’t avoid Dash.  We live in the same town after all, and there’s only like, three places for teenagers to hang out.  And then the ghosts on top of that!  And the ghosts are here because of my parent’s portal, but I’m the one that turned it on – I can’t just ignore that the ghosts are causing problems even if I want to.  I don’t feel like I have a choice but to take responsibility and step in.  And I know you guys have been helping Val and stuff, but -”  Danny shrugged his shoulders. 

“I like being on the farm.  It’s quiet.  And even when there are ghosts,” he noticed their faces, “– and there are ghosts,” Danny confirmed, “they’re different!  They don’t cause trouble.  It’s like,” Danny waved his hand around, “everything’s so close to the cycle of living and dying and everything has it’s time from the plants to the animals and like – uuuuugh,” Danny threw his hands up.  “I don’t know how to explain it.  Death is always a part of living and everyone out there is used to it being a part of life, so when it happens it’s less of a tragedy?”  Danny looked away.  “I guess,” he scratched his arm and fell quiet. 

Sam and Tucker looked at Danny, waiting for him to clear up what he was trying to say.  The wind pushed against his window, a slight whistle from uneven weathering strips cutting through the quiet of the room.  Danny sighed and looked at the ground in front of his feet.  “I feel like less of a freak for dying and coming back when I’m out there.”

“Oh Danny!” Sam moved forward.

Tucker let out a quiet “Danny”.

Danny pushed away from them in his chair, rolling back some.  Rubbing his arms he said “I mean, I know I’m not a freak or anything, but it’s hard to forget that I died when I’m in Amity, you know?  I can’t escape reminders of it and that it makes me different from everyone else.  When I’m out there on the farm it’s just?  I feel at rest.”  He laughed, “that’s stupid isn’t it?”  He ran a hand through his hair. Looking up at them, “A ghost who feels at rest.  But DAMN!  I do, getting to be part of life and death like that makes me feel normal – I feel like I belong out there.”

“Danny,” Tucker glanced over at Sam before turning back, “Danny, do you want to stay there?”

“Tucker!” Sam admonished, “I don’t think –“

Danny laughed, “Yeah, I think I might want to….  Would you hate me if I left you guys again?”

Sam rushed forward to pull Danny into a hug.  “Oh Danny, I don’t think we could ever hate you.”

Tucker joined in, “Yeah, we’ll just have to visit you.”

Danny’s smile was smushed against both their shoulders.

“Do you think I could get internet out there?”

And all three of them laughed.

_________

“So, that’s what I want to do.  If I can,” Danny said.  He stared at the coffee table in front of him.  His parents sat on the couch across from him.

“Well, Danny, I don’t know if we’ll be able to do that.”

“But if that’s what you want, we’ll support you son!”

Danny looked up and gave him parents a smile, “Thanks.”

_______

It turned out Alice was familiar with the work programs that the local school utilized for their students.  It consisted of students taking the core classes, like math and science, in the mornings, and then working on the farm in the afternoons.

The trick was getting Casper High to agree.  But between Alice and Maddie, there was no trouble convincing Principal Ishiyama and Mr. Lancer that Danny would be better off in the modified program.  As long as he came back to take the state proficiency tests, he could even still earn credit for Casper High’s records without having to transfer them back and forth.

Within a few days, Alice, and now Danny, climbed back into the truck, ready to head back down to Arkansas.

“Bye!” Danny called, waving out of the window.

A chorus of bye’s and love you’s sent Danny off as they drove away.

Extra:

“Come on,” Danny laughed as he looked at his friends struggling up the side of the silo.

Tucker’s hand slid off a rung and he yelped.

Looking up at Danny, Sam asked, “are you sure this is safe Danny?”

Laughing again, Danny started climbing again, “Sure is.  Besides, I can always catch you guys before you hit the ground.”

“Wow, that’s sooo reassuring,” Sam grumbled.

Reaching the top of the dome, Danny disappeared from both their sights.  They heard some clangs before his head popped back over the edge, “come on!  Hurry!”  He grinned at Tucker’s frown as Sam reached him first.  Danny disappeared again as he gave Sam room to clamor up.  Soon enough, both their heads popped back over the side.  Twin grins met Tucker as he finished climbing up.  Hands thrust towards Tucker, he grabbed them and let himself be pulled up the rest of the way.

“Okay, we’re here.  What are we supposed to be doing?”  Tucker asked as they crawled their way to the middle of the silo.

Danny sat down, and pointing up said, “Look.”

“Oooh,” Sam breathed.

“Wow,” Tucker added.

The sky stretched up above them, shades of blue creating a fabric where streams of stars traveled across the expanse.  Blushes of red and green broke up the inky darkness and stars twinkled back and forth.  A light breeze caressed the trio and they laid back, enjoying the view.

[drawcupidsbow]

happy birthday isat :)

this took me Wayyyy longer than i thought it would so thats why its a bit late.. ehheh.... i really like how it turned out though !! extra stuff under the cut

okay. okay im gonna get a bit sappy here. bear (🐻) with me

isat has very quickly become my favorite game of all time which is not an exaggeration. never have i played a game that felt so real in its dialogue, characterization, and character interactions. it makes it so easy to relate to them all and so difficult to pick just One favorite. it cured my art block watered my crops fed my family etc etc. i had originally bought it nearly a year ago now. on christmas day to be specific! and for some reason i didnt actually Finish the damn thing until may. and whew did it consume my every waking thought. i havent had this much fun theorizing and being part of a fandom in general in so so long. thank you adrienne for making such a wonderful game and thank you isat fandom for being so kind and friendly! i actually feel like i can make an effort to have a presence here more than anywhere else and i hope i can become closer with all my mutuals and anyone else who wants to talk about isat with me for one million years

okay enough Heres the art you came here for

first time in like. actual years i did sketch then lineart instead of just cleaning up the sketch a bunch LOL so here is the sketch for this one

the dreaded lineart. this took the longest time and i never want to draw again (joke)

self explanatory. i had an idea to add loop but do Not have the energy to execute it currently. oh well!

if you read my big big paragraph of rambling thank you :3c That is all. Im gonna go take a break from drawing for a day or two and lay on the floor

[saras-almanac]

So I’ve been sitting on my feelings about the BuckTommy breakup and handling of it for a while, trying to get my thoughts in order. And after a while of thinking on it—and the recent Lou interview dropping making me feel like my feelings are valid—kind of made me want to just blurt them all out and hope for the best. So this is that.

Ultimately the entire handling of the BuckTommy breakup feels cruel. And not just cruel in an intentional way, but cruel in a casually, not even given any thought cruelty, which is worse sometimes. And to be honest, I think that’s part of why I’ve been struggling with it so much. (That and the echoes of Magicians season 4, which if you know you know).

What I mean by cruelty is just the lack of any real effort or care put into this storyline, one that they had previously been handled with so much care and concern and were praised (rightly so) for at the time. It’s the way they introduce this Tommy as Abby’s ex thing, which makes hardly any sense at all, but also feels cruel in the intention of laughing at the invisible string of fate theory between them. It’s they way that they’re 6 months anniversary and not only have they not talked about this, but Buck (Evan Buckley) didn’t get him a gift that feels cruel because that feels so wildly out of character for him. It’s the way they had the break up play into some bisexual stereotypes at best and inherently biphobic at worst by having Maddie suggest Abby turned him gay or that Buck needs to “explore” things to figure out what he wants or that Buck “Doesn’t know what pond to jump back into” of it all. (Not to mention the comments from OS about wanting Buck to fuck—which I’m not getting into because I didn’t read it and as a bisexual woman, don’t feel the need to go and try to find something that might upset me more.)

All those reasons are why the breakup itself is cruel to the characters, but it’s also cruel to those of us watching, and especially to anyone and everyone who loved and/or related to the character of Tommy, who we see walk away much much worse off than when we found him. It’s the way the story (intentionally or not) is framing it like a romcom break up – make up – pining storyline which they apparently are not doing according to interviews. It’s the way they didn’t give any sort of closure to Tommy for the character or for the audience.

There’s a reason that people lose themselves in stories—it’s because they follow certain rules and contracts. It’s expected that stories do not match up to real life because while things don’t have bigger meanings in life or they don’t work out according to plan, in stories, everything happens for a reason. Because that’s the whole point of what you’re consuming. And along with that, emotional moments are meant to feel cathartic in a way, at least eventually, because you were able to see the bigger picture, to feel the finality to things, and to really understand what’s being said and what’s happening. This breakup does none of that and actually seems to have been included and rushed for shock value and that to me, is just shitty, lazy writing.

If you were going to break them up and have no desire for any sort of reunion or closure, why not make it intentional? Tommy could be the one who wants marriage and kids and settling down and Buck internally freaks out because theoretically he wants that but maybe it’s too soon and as much as Tommy loves Buck, he’s not going to wait around and hope that Buck feels the same for him because he’s been hurt too many times like that. Or Tommy could be leaving for another state because he’s no longer going to be a firefighter or needs to go for family reasons or gets a job at a different station that he applied for ages ago and he has everything all set up and isn’t going to ask Buck to leave his entire life for Tommy, so they decide to breakup even if it hurts both of them. In either of those cases, it’s sad and devastating, but at least there would be some closure to it and understanding of it for both the characters and the audience and some peace knowing that at least these two are going to be moving toward happiness in whatever way that means for them.

Instead, what we have, is a hail-mary last-second breakup that comes out of nowhere and feels abrupt and crappy in the way we leave Tommy specifically because we might never see him again. And that is the crux of the issue. Because the way this was written, the understanding is that they are going to get back together or reunion or at least have that final closure conversation—because that’s what happens in stories. We see this type of surprise breakups, breakups where they issue is they love each other too much and are afraid to go further (Athena/Bobby and Maddie/Chimney to name two examples we saw in universe) only to eventually fight to be together and realize that if they don’t take a chance they might never know how amazing it is. So the fact that it’s set up to follow this same path while nearly every interview is telling the opposite, again demonstrates that casual cruelty as well as an inherent failure on the writing. If you have to go in interview and explain what it is you wrote or are telling, then you have failed as a writer. It’s really as simple as that.

This breakup doesn’t feel set up or foreshadowed, it just feels like they added it on because they didn’t want to do anything more with it? And that feels incredibly crappy as a decision to so many people who related to Buck and Tommy and them coming out later in life and all those other things. I’m rambling and on my phone and feeling a lot of things that I can’t fully express right now, but the long and short of it: If this was always intended to be the final time we see Tommy, this breakup is even crueler than intended.