#this shit is long skdjfnlaksjdnflsd

[touchmycoat]

Mmmmmmmm delicious mmf dp overstim! Would laugh at Airplane's chapter summary except it's perfectly succinct and exactly what I wanted. 10/10 would recommend. So HOT! LBH and LQG on a competitive mission to give SY orgasms over and over? *chef's kiss* Also love that SY transmigrated into a body that matched her identity and am absolutely psyched that you have a ton of backstory you might share later!

oh ff i almost missed this, THANK YOU DARLING i'm so glad you liked it!!!!! the prompt was SO good ;; multiple orgasms + overstim is a lifestyle and it is one i pursue and one i highly recommendlj nldkjfnlaksjdnf

and yeah i got a little obsessed with the idea of trans woman!SY and trans man!SJ!!! I love the idea of them flip-flopping into bodies they prefer and having a sense of solidarity with each other bc of that lolol, at least from SY to SJ....SJ's a grumpy pants

so these are discarded drafts, not really backstories TTTT The original plan was to set this in the water prison, but that turned out to necessitate a little too much backstory. Then I tried to make it a bingge vs. bingmei thing but stopped when the logistics got too much. Second-to-last attempt was a "inviting LQG in for the first time" post-canon concept but then the fucking FEELINGS took over so i just figured Nope, stop writing plot & backstory, it's Pussy Hours Only.

Anyways, here are the scrapped drafts. There's some stuff I really do like in there:

(also the fic in question)

The Water Prison Ver.

Getting wife-plot’d into abject horniness only satiable by upwards of two men was a pain and embarrassing, yes, but if Shen Qingqiu really stepped back and thought about it, it was a fairly minor price to pay for this body. How wild it had been at first to think she’d woken up in yet another man’s body, only to discover small soft tits and an honest-to-god cunt and feeling like all her dreams had come true, that the ancestors were smiling down upon her as if to say okay yes, we did fuck up on the body assignment upon your reincarnation, so here’s the body you were always meant for twenty-something years late haha happy birthday!

Then the elation had quickly taken a backseat to having to deal with PIDW’s “plot.” Worst of all were the OOC restrictions, which had Shen Qingqiu binding her breasts every morning because the original goods was a man—argh, goddamn System! Of course Shen Qingqiu wanted to support her trans brother but wasn’t this her body now? Perhaps the original goods was enjoying her old body in the modern day somewhere and yeah, it may come with several incurable and chronically painful conditions, but it also came with a dick! Surely if the original goods was allowed to enjoy Shen Qingqiu’s old penis then Shen Qingqiu was allowed to enjoy hisold breasts?!

Fast-forward now to post-OOC restriction unlocking, when she very well could have come out to Luo Binghe—to anybody, really. She didn’t, however, for several reasons, the primary of which was the simple fact that no opportunity really came up. Look, Shen Qingqiu just hated making a fuss, okay? She really wasn’t the type to call for a gathering, either solemn or celebratory, to tell people capital-N-News, nor was she so eager to unbalance the logic of the entire PIDW world (insofar as a mess of cheap tropes and shitty characterization restrictions could be called a literary “world”) with a sudden gender reveal. Or maybe it would actually help her?? The original goods had been portrayed as a man up until the moment of his awful death, but maybe, by stallion novel rules, Shen Qingqiu’s life could be saved if Luo Binghe should get his revenge by BEEP BEEP and then getting her to BEEEEEEP—?

…Well she wanted that even less!! What kind of crapsack universe where women only existed for every flavor of papapa with the protag!! There was also the fact that Luo Binghe was just her student right now. She refused to think about having sex with him in any way—and so the question of coming out to her little white lotus got completely backshelved just like that. Forget it! Shen Qingqiu would just play the immortals-are-immortals-gender-roles-aren’t-important card for now and worry about it when the time came.

(Besides, after a few Shizun is my ideal man! comments and a few why do you say man? Are behaviors you wish to emulate strictly delineated by gender?lectures, Luo Binghe seemed to get the idea. Her bright little Bing stopped calling her a man completely, so everyone was the winner!)

The only person Shen Qingqiu did end up coming out to was Liu Qingge, and that was more a product of circumstance. Having anticipated that Madam Meiyin would be a solo mission, Shen Qingqiu had left her binder off in the inn that morning, which meant that the subsequent plunge into the pool of icy water…

She had not anticipated Liu Qingge passing out from the shock of it all. Really, Qin-gege, after cutting your way through the veritable orgy of much bigger, rounder, and symmetrical tits, thesewere going to knock you out? That spoke more to the nature of the shock than anything else, she supposed, and forced down some amount of wariness when he woke up. How would he react? It wouldn’t really do any harm if he were to force the issue, she supposed, since she was perfectly fine with telling the rest of Cang Qiong that she was actually a woman, but had it not been her here, instead the original goods—? Then she would really have to reassess her opinion of Liu Qingge??

But turned out, she’d worried for nothing. Liu Qingge did not accuse her of being a liar, nor did he demand she fix this deception right away. Instead, he just kind of sprang to his feet, walked into a tree, and then came and sat back down. He asked why, of course, which necessitated a quick little non-lie (growing up, presenting male was always safer, and I suppose I’ve never gotten around to switching back). Then Liu Qingge’s expression was blazing with a sudden intensity Shen Qingqiu didn’t quite understand, but after that it was all over. Liu Qingge declared he’d keep her secret (which was not necessary, but thank you, Shidi), and that was that.

…Until a year or so later, during the whole Luo Binghe-was-back-for-revenge leg of things.

Apparently Liu Qingge vowing to keep Shen Qingqiu’s secret was directly correlated to him kicking up the hugest fuss at Jinlan City until Huan Hua was forced to tie him up too and escort him to the water prison alongside Shen Qingqiu. Ah, how kind and chivalrous of Liu-dage to keep such a close eye on her and her honor! Even though she thought there was little chance her “secret” would be exposed (and ignoring the fact that it didn’t even need to be a secret at all), it was still nice to have the company and backup in case of any emergencies. So despite Luo Binghe’s increasingly stormy expression (had Liu Qingge thrown a spanner into a plan of his?), Shen Qingqiu offered Liu Qingge a little nod of gratitude as they were packed away in the transport.

Then the Little Palace Mistress visited, and things got a little more…wack. Okay first of all, why would the ingredients to a wife plot show up here and now?! The thorny steel whip was excessive and aesthetically incoherent, but surely the little packet of exploding fuck-or-die powder “that only affected women” was beyond contrived?! Why had Shen Qingqiu been so thoroughly profiled and why was Big Data feeding him such obnoxiously specific “small scenarios”—?!

Credit where credit was due, Liu Qingge actually reacted faster to the threat than Shen Qingqiu herself did, blocking Shen Qingqiu from Luo Binghe’s sight and muttering a terse, don’t let him see! before launching himself forward to drive Luo Binghe away. He was talking about the thrumming discomfort building under her skin, Shen Qingqiu realized. And he had immediately warned her to keep this from Luo Binghe because—

“Shizun?”

—dammit, sorry Liu Qingge, this shit was just too painful! Was this what an honest-to-god period felt like?! Holy shit Shen Qingqiu might honestly contemplate taking her dick back if having ovaries meant dealing with this every month!

“Leave,” Liu Qingge snarled at Luo Binghe, but it was too late now. The papapa-poison (that the Little Palace Mistress had been planning on coercing Luo Binghe into bed with?? Holy shit, Shen Qingqiu was actually kind of glad she took the dose now) was making itself known and Shen Qingqiu kind of had a choice to make.

And when she called for Liu Qingge, Luo Binghe went as white as a sheet before he blew up an entire stone wall.

“I. I.” As furious as Luo Binghe sounded, Shen Qingqiu could just see past the spray of dust and mist how hurt his body language was, how small. It made an altogether different kind of pain squeeze inside Shen Qingqiu’s chest. “I thought that there used to be a time when Shizun entrusted me with everything, and that it was my blood that changed things. Turns out, even back then Shizun had her secrets.”

That was too much. That was way too much.

“Binghe!” That was her I-am-your-Shizun-and-I-am-angry tone, and it was somewhat gratifying to see Luo Binghe instinctively straighten to hear her lecture. “This was not a secret I needed to tell, much less owed anyone!”

Luo Binghe pressed his lips together until they went pale, but he said nothing in response. Breathing through the drumming pain, Shen Qingqiu forced herself to calm a bit before continuing.

“But I did think of telling you, for what it’s worth. I did tell you.”

That last bit slipped out thanks to a combination of the poison and feeling kind of wronged. Fine, so she’d never outright uttered the words hello Luo Skywalker, I am a woman, but Binghe had seemed to get her hints just fine! How could Binghe pretend that she’d, she’d proudly masqueraded as a man in front of him or something, how could Binghe act like he never had any idea?

Feeling even more petulant as a result, Shen Qingqiu added, “I didn’t even tell Liu-shidi. He found out on accident.”

“Shen Qingqiu!” Liu Qingge sounded offended for some reason. Luo Binghe’s eyes flashed.

“Then is Shizun and Liu-shibo not—?”

“Not what?” The pain was getting so uncomfortable now that Shen Qingqiu was having a hard time staying upright, much less concentrate. She had to lean heavily on Liu Qingge’s torso behind her to not slump onto the floor, and the body warmth there was…tempting. So tempting.

“Not cultivation partners.”

“What? No—!”

Before Shen Qingqiu could even work up the wherewithal to be properly shocked by the accusation, Luo Binghe had already blasted Liu Qingge about six feet away, holding Shen Qingqiu upright in his own arms.

“Then Liu-shibo takes too many liberties, touching Shizun like that,” Luo Binghe said coldly. Liu Qingge got up across the stone platform, thankfully acid-free and still in possession of all his limbs, looking furious. “Shouldn’t Liu-shibo know better about respecting women?”

Respecting—hold on, Binghe?! Don’t make this into some fake feminism discourse when Liu Qingge was only trying to help! When Shen Qingqiu had been the one nuzzling up against that firm, firm chest!

“Then you should know better about respect for your Shizun!” Liu Qingge shot back, managing to strike no less an imposing figure despite having his upper body bound up in ropes and his spiritual energy sealed away. This was probably somebody’s peak sexual fantasy, Shen Qingqiu thought, a beautiful man, tied up and vaguely damp, but staunchly unwilling to bow to his captor. Wow, it was hard to believe Airplane wasted a perfectly good character like Liu Qingge, killing him offscreen nonetheless. “Disciples shouldn’t foster inappropriate desires for their teachers. Put her down.”

Inappropriate—what. What. What in the world was all of this, some symptom of Airplane’s inconsistent writing and wilted plot developments? Why was the conversation jumping to so many inexplicable places? Was Shen Qingqiu really meant to believe that A) Luo Binghe’s hatred and grudge towards her dissipated and morphed into sexual attraction just like that simply because she was a woman, and that B) Liu Qingge was the first person to recognize and accept that? Neither of those statements made scientific sense! Please, call the System and straighten out this bullshit!

[Bling bling! The System is at your service 24 hours a day! How can we—]

Before the System’s awful, trauma-triggering voice could continue any further and before Liu Qingge and Luo Binghe could kick each other’s lights out, Shen Qingqiu tossed her head back with a yell of pain. Then, she cut herself out by biting down on the closest thing within reach—Luo Binghe’s bicep.

[—happy to provide dialogue options. Please select from A, I would rather die than be disgraced by demon scum, Luo Binghe, B, as if your frigid Liu-shibo could have helped me in the first place, or C—]

No, no, no, cancel! What the fuck were these awful options, was she just fated to die by this stupid loin-boiling poison right here right now after pissing off one or both of the men who could help? Why in the world would she risk angering either of them when Luo Binghe could go look for a cure outside and when Liu Qingge could, could pass her spiritual energy to ease the pain?!

[Because there is no cure except BEEP! Please select from A, I would rather die than—]

Shitty story, shitty system! You know what? Shen Qingqiu refused to choose, she simply refused. The dialogue options gave away one crucial detail, which seemed to be that if she chose one of either Luo Binghe or Liu Qingge, the other was to be alienated beyond reasonable reparations, and hadn’t she already done this song and dance with the Abyss? Considering how uncomfortably terrified she was of her once-white lotus now, had it been worth it?

[User Warning: failure to select from dialogue options will result in a Grade D punishment phase—]

“I don’t care,” Shen Qingqiu declared out loud, “I don’t care! I’m not choosing!”

Both Luo Binghe and Liu Qingge froze where they stood before turning to look at her.

The Bingge vs. Bingmei ver.

As Shen Qingqiu fled her little cottage home to protect her life, honor, and probably continence, she decided to have words with Airplane-bro. Several of them, in this order:

Fuck you and your absurd, unscientific, bullshit wife plots that pop up everywhere like goddamn mushrooms! Like mold spores! Like maggots!

Actually, fuck words. She was just going to throw hands, because what in actual hell was this situation—

“Liu Qingge!” she howled at the sky. No, it wasn’t because she thought her Binghe needed help beating off that menacing Bingge asshole, but since her good Shidi happened to be in the area after visiting yesterday, what was the harm in getting Binghe some backup? The faster they got rid of Bingge this time around, the better.

The battle dogging her heels arrived at about the same time as Liu Qingge, who descended from the sky in all his war god glory. Shen Qingqiu drew Xiu Ya to intercept him at once, because as pretty much expected, he barely spared the situation a furrowed brow before indiscriminately attacking both Luo Binghes. Catching Cheng Luan in a parry, Shen Qingqiu quickly hissed for Shidi to focus, please, do not attack my husband before you drive off the intruder.

Except, as Liu Qingge and Shen Qingqiu’s Luo Binghe ganged up on the original goods-Luo Binghe, Bingge smiled menacingly across the clearing at Shen Qingqiu.

“I’d think twice before banishing me,” he declared, spitting aside a mouthful of blood. “Not if you want Shen Qingqiu to survive.”

Right on cue, a stabbing pain in the base of Shen Qingqiu’s stomach sent her to her knees.

“Shizun!”

“Shen Qingqiu!”

“What,” Bingmei asked through gritted teeth, “did you do to her?”

“Banish him,” Shen Qingqiu gasped, clutching at her abdomen. Ouch, ouch, ouch, was this what an honest-to-god period felt like? She really thought she’d been freed from chronic pain and her dick when she got dumped in the original goods’ body, but turned out she was just forfeiting to a lifetime of torment from this bloody Great Auntie?? “Do it, Binghe. Don’t worry, I know the cure.”

“You do not,” Bingge said sharply. “That is a custom poison mixed—”

“—by the Glacier Fox Demon Liu Chuan in the Great Western Tundra?” Shen Qingqiu scoffed. Despite the cold sweat beading her forehead, she still found the wherewithal to smirk. “Like I said, I know.”

“What’s the cure?” Liu Qingge barked, impatient as always. Shen Qingqiu flapped a weak hand at him.

“I’ll tell you later. Just banish him al—”

The poison chose that moment to ball up all her insides in a steely grip and twisting. She choked down blood and a scream both, and Luo Binghe jumped into action.

“Yes, Shizun,” he gritted out, Xin Mo unsealed in his hands. In front of him, Bingge’s identical face twisted up into a snarl.

“No, even if you know the cure, it’s too late now. Look at you. Shizun, you can’t even talk anymore, can you?”

“Shut your mouth,” Luo Binghe demanded. Shen Qingqiu could hear Xin Mo swinging into the offensive, and she wanted very badly to tell Binghe to stop, to keep her husband from needing to take such risks with his psyche anymore.“Shizun says she’s fine! So—”

“Luo Binghe!”

That was Liu Qingge, and there was all of a sudden body heat and a firm chest right beside Shen Qingqiu’s head. Through the cloud of excruciating pain, something was telling Shen Qingqiu to get closer, closer, that was it, that was it.

“What is the cure?” Liu Qingge demanded to know. At the same time, he sat Shen Qingqiu up in his arms, and Shen Qingqiu whined. The single sound, soft and needy, cut across the whole forest clearing and brought with it silence.

“The cure,” Bingge said, voice dangerous and silken, “is intensive dual cultivation. Only, since she’s already at the state where a single partner won’t be enough. Delay any longer and she’ll die.”

The last thing Shen Qingqiu consciously saw was Liu Qingge and her Binghe trading a single glance across the clearing, before Luo Binghe knocked his evil counterpart out and hoisting Bingge into his arms.

//

Th next time Shen Qingqiu woke, she felt significantly better, and there were two cocks inside of her. The first thing she saw upon waking was Liu Qingge’s eyes widening before his whole face went violently red and he flung himself away.

The by-now-familiar sensation of dick inside her cunt went with him, so Shen Qingqiu felt fairly certain in the deduction that it had been Liu Qingge’s dick inside of her, placed there while she was passed out, presumably to save her life.

“Shizun!” came Luo Binghe’s familiar voice behind her, tense with anxiety, and that was, oh, mhm, that was Luo Binghe’s heavenly pillar inside her ass alright. She too knew this sensation from indulging her needy husband’s perversions far too many times. “Shizun, I’m so, so sorry, but—”

“Binghe doesn’t have to apologize,” Shen Qingqiu cut him off immediately. Oh gods, her voice sounded so rough from strain, that couldn’t possibly be pleasant to listen to. Still though, when Luo Binghe shifted inside her, all she could seem to do was roll her hips and moan some more in that gravelly timbre. “Neither does Liu-shidi. Where’s…?”

“Right here, Shizun. Ready to be at your service.”

Her Luo Binghe’s grip tightened around her hip, and Shen Qingqiu petted blindly behind her for his head.

“Binghe didn’t banish him like Shizun ordered, this disciple is useless,” Luo Binghe mumbled. What else could Shen Qingqiu do but drag his head over her shoulder for a sloppy kiss on the cheek?

The "Help LQG is Pining" ver.

Liu Qingge had never, ever imagined the feeling of Shen Qingqiu’s cunt around him, and that was the absolute truth. This wasn’t a topic that came up often in his personal life—he didn’t really let it, actively dissuading any and all improper and vulgar conversation about Shen Qingqiu with a drawn sword or ready fist, especially after Shen Qingqiu’s newly revealed status as a woman—but on the rare occasions that it did (thanks mostly to shameless martial siblings and family members), nobody seemed to really believe him.

Not that it mattered now, because he no longer had to imagine it. He knew for a fact how tight Shen Qingqiu could squeeze around him, yet how vulnerably she could open up. First around his head, then down his shaft, lips fluttering as she kept herself from jerking back up and off. He also knew how red Shen Qingqiu’s face got and how desperately Shen Qingqiu avoided eye contact when she worked to sit down on a cock. He knew where she placed her slim fingers to brace herself (one on the bed and one shakily over his abs) and how her thigh muscles looked flexed on either side of his pelvis.

Liu Qingge also had the distinct displeasure of knowing what Luo Binghe would have to say about all this.

“Do not come.”

“Binghe,” Shen Qingqiu immediately scolded. She’d been more than accommodating toward Liu Qingge during this entire process because, for some reason, she believed this was himdoing her a favor. If Liu Qingge were less busy mentally punching himself for taking advantage of her dire situation, he’d tell her that being asked to save her life was his distinct privilege. (But maybe not. He was no good with words.) “Don’t talk to your Shibo like that.”

“I’m only reminding him to control himself,” Luo Binghe protested, shooting Liu Qingge a glare over Shen Qingqiu’s shoulder which Liu Qingge returned. “This will all be for nothing if he climaxes too early, and I don’t believe he’s ever done this before!”

“It won’t,” Liu Qingge said through gritted teeth, “be a problem.” His fingers were embedded stony and white-knuckled in the bedding beneath him and right above them were Shen Qingqiu’s hips. Still, despite the point of most intimate contact between them, every muscle in Liu Qingge’s body was flexed to keep himself at some semblance of a polite distance. This was because Shen Qingqiu was doing the same thing, braced like a bridge on top of him. “Will you get on with it already?”

“See? He’s rushing me,” Luo Binghe complained darkly. Liu Qingge did his best to keep his entire attention on the half-demon’s sour expression and not on his hand, pumping in and out of Shen Qingqiu’s back passage. “I have no confidence in him, Shizun. We should just try again on our own. I’ll try circling more yang qi this ti—”

“We,” Shen Qingqiu cut him off, “have tried everything, Binghe, and so far no alternative method’s worked. This is the only surefire cure we knowand lucky for us, Liu-shidi was gracious enough to help, so won’t Binghe please hurry up and put it inside already.”

Liu Qingge’s eyes went wide, and Luo Binghe’s face too was the strangest blend of chastised and aroused as he snapped to attention.

“Yes, Shizun.”

And before Shen Qingqiu was even done huffing, everything suddenly squeezed blindinglytight around Liu Qingge��Liu Qingge’s cock and Liu Qingge’s hair, into which one of Shen Qingqiu’s hands had apparently wandered and was now holding on for dear life.

Because Luo Binghe was pushing into her. Liu Qingge couldn’t see it but he sure could feel it, first through the spasms of Shen Qingqiu’s walls, then throughShen Qingqiu’s walls; apparently, Luo Binghe’s cock was just so damn huge that Liu Qingge thought he could feel the head of it skim up his own length in a strangely intimate caress.

When Luo Binghe stopped moving, Shen Qingqiu collapsed gasping into Liu Qingge’s arms. Liu Qingge braced but didn’t hold her, steadily facing down Luo Binghe’s glower.

As much as Liu Qingge resolutely did not hate the position he was in, he’d also come in with a clear understanding aboutthe stakes. Shen Qingqiu was suffering a poisoning, he’d been told, one that required more than one cultivator and more than a few orgasms to properly cure. She’d been in discomfort for weeks, and they’d exhausted every dual cultivation option at their disposal before bringing him in.

Liu Qingge was here to ease her pain, pure and simple, the same way he had done once a month every month for Without a Cure. As much as he hated the isolation that Luo Binghe was imposing upon her with their marriage, he wasn’t here to break them up.

He’d try tokeep his hands to himself.

“Shizun,” Luo Binghe was murmuring. At least when he wasn’t busy glaring at Liu Qingge, he did seem very attentive to his wife. “Is this okay? There’s still a little more to go, shall I use more oil?”

Shen Qingqiu made a weak noise of assent into Liu Qingge’s collar, and Liu Qingge looked away when Luo Binghe began combing her hair to one side and kissing the back of her neck. In the corner of his vision he saw Luo Binghe blindly patting for the bottle of oil, and silently nudged it into his hold.

Between his stomach and Shen Qingqiu’s, Liu Qingge could feel heat begin to build as Luo Binghe resumed his work of burying himself entirely inside his wife’s back passage. Liu Qingge’s muscles twitched, but he did not move. He didn’t move because Shen Qingqiu didn’t move, and even if Shen Qingqiu did decide to move, things might still just be a dance between her and Luo Binghe anyways. Liu Qingge might just keep lying here, stiff in every way and cycling his spiritual energy until Shen Qingqiu got off enough and was cured.