#this made me imagine a world where Lily set herself up as a socialite of the New Orleans nightlife akin to the mistresses of French kings
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There is more pragmatism to Lilyâs willing involvement in Louis and Lestatâs burgeoning romance than she is often credited with. While Lily appears to be doing relatively well for herself as a black sex worker in this time and place, she would have been quite aware that her position at The Fairplay Saloon is contingent on her youth and beauty, as well as the whims of her white managers. Louis is a regular client of hers and, judging by the warmth of her greeting to him in her introductory scene, someone Lily has genuine fondness for. There is clearly a tentative trust between them as the same performance that Louis uses to conceal his lack of interest in women would invariably expose it to Lily. Nevertheless, Lily endangers that relationship and a source of her livelihood when she shares that information with Lestat, something she unapologetically admits to Louis (âI told Mr. Lioncourt you and me usually just talk.â). The boldness she displays in doing this suggests that she is not only certain that Lestat will not use this knowledge against Louis, but that she has recognised an opportunity in enabling the pair to finally act upon their sexual tension.Â
In a world where Lestat and Louis were and remained human men, any affair between them would require discretion and plausible deniability. A good way of concealing it would be for one or both of them to publicly set Lily up as a kept woman; a mildly scandalous association that would leave all those who need to believe the act feeling appropriately smug, shocked, and, critically, none the wiser. Lily could continue to perform this role even if Louis and Lestatâs romance came to an end, thereby providing cover for any subsequent relationships, and an answer to any curiosity about why an eligible bachelor would remain unmarried. It is a life that would provide her with stability, comfort, and a future. While Lily does seem to care about Louis as a person and is accepting of his and Lestatâs homosexuality, it does a disservice to the character and the writing to reduce her motivations to that of allyship.
#I intend to spend this Easter writing about gay vampires as the Lord intended#this made me imagine a world where Lily set herself up as a socialite of the New Orleans nightlife akin to the mistresses of French kings#which then made me feel sad#Lily#Louis de Pointe du Lac#Interview with the Vampire#Vampterview#Jagged Jottings
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Burned Part 9
Summary:Â Alfie Solomons is in need of a secretary. Tommy Shelby mentions a young woman in need of employment. From there the two step into a dangerous dance together.
Part 9:Â Arguments ensue over the Shelbys and Louise celebrates a birthday
     The next morning, Louise called Alfie and told him she was feeling under the weather and wouldnât be going to work. The man didnât mind and didnât suspect anything. Then she rang Ishmael and said Alfie allowed her the car for the day. The boy gave her the keys without much hesitation. Alfie treated Louise like royalty so he wasnât in any position to question. It may not have been fair to lie, but there was something she had to do.
      Louise pulled up the gravel drive, amazed by the beauty and intense power of the Arrow House. It was fairly similar to the estate she grew up in, but it had been some time since she��d seen such a stately home.
      She walked up the steps with a bouquet of condolence lilies. After ringing the doorbell, she realized how nervous she was. There was no telling how a man like Tommy Shelby mourned.
      Polly answered the door; a look of surprise crossed her face. âLouise, I havenât seen you in nearly a year.â The last time, the young woman was in Birmingham she was clutching a blood-soaked sweater to her stab wounds.
      âMs. Gray, itâs so nice to see you again. I was saddened to hear the news about Grace, I heard she was a lovely woman.â
      Polly had a feeling Louise was raised to be a socialite even if she never became one. But every occasion, happy or sad, had a set of etiquette and demeanor. And although she fit the role well, Louise did seem genuine. âThank you, dear. Iâll let Tommy know you stopped by.â Polly said gently and took the flowers.
      âIs he not home? Have I come at a bad time?â Louise was hoping to give her condolences to the widower.
      âIâm afraid heâs absent at the moment.â Tommyâs aunt sighed heavily. She knew he was out in the pastures and there would be nothing to coax him back. He was in such a state. âHe hasnât been seeing anyone lately.â
      âOh no, of course.â Louise nodded. âI canât imagine what heâs going through. I donât want to intrude.â
      Polly had no ill feelings toward the woman. In fact, she was glad to sheâd recovered so well from the attack. âDo you want to come in for tea?â She offered. âAdaâs here as well.â
      âThat sounds lovely, thank you, but I should get back. I want to return Alfieâs car soon.â
      Concern set on Pollyâs face at the mention of that name. âAlfie. Alfie Solomons?â She asked slowly.
      âYes, Tommy helped me get a job in the bakery.â Louise thought it was strange that Polly, who Alfie said was a key piece of the Shelby company, didnât know about the arrangement.
      âHeâŚâ The older woman pinched the bridge of her nose with a weary groan. She cursed her nephew for making such a foolish decision. âLove, that man is dangerously unhinged.â
      âOh, Ms. Gray, itâs alright.â Louise grew uncomfortable. She didnât want to hear someone judge Alfie when they didnât know him as well as she did. âI am aware of Alfieâs business dealings.â Proper and polite even under the eyes of scrutiny. They were two women who were waist-deep in gang activity but she needed to be wary. Her loyalty lay with Alfie and Pollyâs obviously lay with her family.
      Polly studied her face. âMaybe I misjudged you. You may be naĂŻve or maybe you like being under his wing. Just know that there are consequences to that.â She wasnât criticizing, merely observing. Sheâd worked this job long enough.
      Louise swallowed and stepped back. It was hard to hear the questions sheâd asked herself at one point. âPlease tell Mr. Shelby Iâm sorry for his loss. Good day.â She said stiffly and returned to the car.
      âBe careful, men like him get restless.â
~~~~~~~~~~~~
      On the drive back, Louise couldnât help but ruminate on Pollyâs warning. Was she naĂŻve or did she get thrills from danger? Was that really a reason to be with a person? Was Alfie with her for the right reasons? Would he ever tire of her?
      It was late afternoon when Louise returned to her apartment. Unbeknownst to her, Alfie was waiting and had been for an hour.
      Heâd been in a frenzy ever since he asked Ishmael to call on Louise to make sure she was okay and didnât need medication for her illness. Ishmael told him about giving her the car, unaware of her faux illness. The poor young man was still smarting after Alfie whacked him on the upside of the head and berated him about being thick.
      After telling Ishmael off, Alfie was standing across from Louiseâs apartment. He was two minutes from going to call for help to look for her.
      When he saw her arrive, he headed towards her. ââBout to lose me fucking mind.â His booming voice started Louise and made her drop her keys.
      âAlfie!â She pressed a hand to her heart. âYou cannot sneak up on me like that.â She stooped down to retrieve her keys.
      His face was already turning red since heâd worked himself up enough before sheâd even arrived. âWhereâve you been, eh?â She could see he was deeply angered. It wasnât a fit of temper flaring because of irritation. No, heâd been moved to a fierce displeasure.
      âI said I was home for the day. Then I ran some errands when I felt up to leaving the flat.â She turned her back to him while opening the door.
      Alfie stormed inside once it was unlocked.
      Louise stood dumbfounded. âWhy, yes, Alfie, do come in.â She muttered sarcastically under her breath. She followed behind him.
      âYouâre fucking lying to me.â He paced in the front hall like a caged tiger. âYou lied to me and you lied to me fucking staff!â
      âIâm-â
      âDonât.â He stopped and held up a finger. His jaw was twitching from how hard he was clenching his teeth. His eyes were wide and he looked ready to kick off. âDozens of times I called.â His voice climbed in volume. âCalled your neighbors, they said youâd left hours ago. Called âbout everyone in Camden looking for you!â He pointed at her accusingly. âSo âfore you answer, think, yeah? Because you donât know what I can find out, love.â
      Louise stared at him, disgusted by how threatening his tone was. âI am an adult and Iâm free to go about my own life.â She retorted and crossed her arms over her chest. âI donât need to ask for Alfie Solomonsâs permission to go anywhere.â
      His nostrils flared. âYou think itâs fucking fine to just disappear, not telling anyone where youâve fucking gone?â He demanded, his eyes narrowing.
      âSince when do I have to tell anyone where Iâm going?â She exclaimed.
      âUnbelievable,â He slammed his cane down on the hardwood floor almost making the flat shake around him, âacting like a fucking child. Just tell me where you were.â
      âIâm acting like a child?â She scoffed and threw her hands up. âIâm not the one throwing a tantrum, you are!â
      âWhere were you?â He repeated.
      âI was out.â
      âLouise, I swearâŚâ
      âWhat? Youâll punish me like one of your men?â She challenged with a sharp snap.
      Alfie felt like heâd been kicked in the stomach. âI wouldâŚwould never.â His voice broke out in shame. The fact that it had even crossed her mind made him sick. He never wanted to be grouped in with the men who would abuse a woman. âFucking hell, Lou, canât you see Iâm terrified to lose you?â
      âYou arenât losing me, you daft man. If I was going to leave you, Iâd tell you.â She saw the crack in his anger but she was still upset by how he approached her. So she didn't back down.
      âThatâs not what Iâm talking âbout.â He muttered and chewed at the inside of his cheek. He gripped his hands together anxiously as he stayed under her gaze.
      âThen what in the world are you so worked up about?â
      He bit his tongue but couldnât hold back. âI ainât âbout to lose you like that!â He shouted.
      They faced each other in the hall, the room falling silent for a moment. Alfieâs shoulder heaving and his face twisted in grief.
      âLike what? I donât know what youâre on about.â Her voice quieted as they arrived at the root of his anger.
      He grimaced and scrubbed a hand over his face, fidgeting in distress. âLike Grace. Like fucking Tommy Shelby. I ainât gonna let some fucker take you from me because of what I do.â His voice wavered and he was on the brink of breaking down. âMy worst fear is losing you, Louise. And my enemies canât know that, yeah, or theyâll exploit it. This lifestyle, right, itâs fucking dangerous and Iâve put you right in the middle of it. I feel guilty but IâŚâ He looked down at her hands. It was overwhelming to divulge in such personal feelings. It was so rare for him to even express such emotions. Now he had to learn how to put words to those emotions for Louise. She made it a bit easier but he was still working on it. âBut I canât be without you, Lou.â
      âWell, you donât have to.â She tried to get him to look at her again. But he kept his eyes downcast. âAlfie, Iâm not going anywhere, Iâve already told you that.â
      âWhat if you end up dead âcause of me?â His blue eyes slowly met her face again. He looked wracked with guilt and worry, his brow furrowed.
      Louiseâs voice stuck in her throat for a moment. It was hard to see him in such a state because she wasnât confident in her ability to comfort him. She could only do her best. âTh-that wonât happen.â But it was impossible to say for sure. âAlfie, no one is guaranteed tomorrow.â She led him over to the parlor to sit. Wrapping her arms around him, she let him lean on her. She pressed soothing kisses to the side of his face. âThe only thing Iâm concerned about is spending my time with you. Because, in the end, thatâs what matters to me. I donât care how much time we have left, I care that Iâm with you.â
      Alfie buried his face in the crook of her neck, closing his eyes. He tried to steady his breath but had gotten so worked up it would take some time before he evened out again. âIâm no good, Lou.â
      âYouâve told me that before but I still donât agree.â She whispered and held him close.
      He sighed deeply and knew he could never change her mind. They sat in silence, Louise rubbing his shoulder and kissing him every so often. Finally, Alfie had calmed down enough to be rational.
      âWhere were you?â
      The accusation tone had left his voice so Louise was honest. âI went to pay my respects to the Shelbys.â She answered.
      âFucking hell.â He grumbled and lifted his head. âRight, I guess I canât control where you go. But I would like a warning so I donât lose me fucking mind again.â
      Louise could compromise and nodded. âOkay, Iâm sorry, I just didnât think youâd be happy with where I was going.â
      He sat back and rubbed his eyes. The amount of worry for her had exhausted him. âI know you trust the Shelbys more than I do. But you need to be fucking careful with âem.â
      âTheyâve only treated me kindly.â
      âI knowâŚI know.â He rested his elbows on his knees and hunched over slightly. He wouldnât launch into another argument with her. One was more than enough for a long time. âBut just please, exercise caution.â He pled.
      Sensing the desperation behind his words, she nodded. âAlright, next time Iâll tell you and we can discuss it.â She suggested. âIâm sorry for upsetting you.â She leaned forward to touch his cheek and guide his eyes back to her.
      âMâsorry for yelling.â He looked embarrassed. âWerenât right, you deserve better treatment than that.â
      âI know you didnât mean it.â She pressed her forehead to his. âI love you, Alfie, thatâs not going to change.â
      Alfie wasnât positive. He was a foul-mouthed sinner with blood on his hands. In any other world, Louise would be with someone who truly deserved her. But she persisted and remained with him. He wasnât sure if he was the luckiest man in the world, or selfishly evil for keeping her by his side for his own benefit.
      As if she could read his mind, she spoke again. âYouâre stuck with me.â She informed him with a smile.
      He chuckled weakly and tucked a curl behind her ear. He drew away to look into her eyes. The hazel flecks shining with adoration for him. She looked at him in a way no one else ever had. And he was sure no one else ever would. He was aware that he would only have eyes for her for the rest of his life. âLou, Iâd follow you to the fucking ends of the Earth if you asked me to. Iâm yours.â
      That was it. Alfie was surrendering. Releasing the doubts and falling to his knees in front of her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
      It was encouraging to know that even when faced with a difficult issue, Louiseâs relationship with Alfie could endure. In fact, she felt like it was even stronger. A real relationship dealt with the real world. She couldnât have the fluffy relationships from the romance novels she read as a teenager. They simply did not exist.
      She much preferred Alfie anyways. The sly glances he gave her throughout the day and the subtle touches warmed her heart. There was a major difference between Alfie at work and Alfie in private. There was a reputation that needed to be upheld. Louise didnât change that if anything she enhanced it. Anyone who worked with them knew she was a major trigger. A gangsterâs woman was sacred, the sole person on the Earth who had access to his heart. She wasnât disposable. She was above all else. A Medusa to others. One glance could massively fuck you over.
      Louise wasnât very fond of being feared. If anything, she felt a little lonely. No one, except for Ollie would speak to her unless it was work related. And even then they preferred going to Ollie.
      Sheâd made friends outside the bakery but she often worked long hours so it was hard to socialize. Only by her own choices though. Louise was dedicated to keeping Alfieâs life organized if to just ease his stress by a fraction. Plus she never wanted to be the young socialite who wandered around the house, bored and drunk before noon. Work gave her purpose.
      âLou, sâgetting late. Why donât you head home, love?â
      She was sat at her desk when Alfie came to hover in the doorway between them. âI will after Iâve typed this up.â Her eyes remained fixed on the paper in front of her.
      âYou donât have to finish everything today.â He leaned against the doorjamb and crossed his arms over his chest.
      âYou said you needed it by tomorrow.â She replied and mindlessly kept typing.
      âRight, well, fuck what I said. Yeah, now Iâm saying I donât need it by tomorrow.â
      Louise stilled her hands and looked up. âAre you going to say something different tomorrow.â She raised an eyebrow. âBecause Iâd rather get it done than face the wrath of Alfie Solomons tomorrow.â
      He chuckled and straightened up. âCâmon, you, Iâll walk ya home.â He offered and turned to get his things.
      âSir.â A man jogged up to Louiseâs desk.
      âWhat?â Alfie grunted as the burden of work returned.
      The dark haired boy looked no older than eighteen. The mere action of approaching Alfie made him appear ill with worry. His eyes were wide and he stood on edge, ready to bolt at any moment. âSabiniâs men, a few of âem threatened the pub owner down the street. Heâs come to complain.â
      Alfieâs face clouded over. Things werenât well in London, especially on the Jewish front. Sabini was getting more confident and toeing the lines. With the possible threat from the Changrettaâs, Alfie was starting to really lose his temper with the Italians. Even more so than before.
      âWell, thatâs fucking fantastic, innit?â He threw his hands up. âYou tell him, yeah, that Iâll meet with him in an hour.â He pulled his hat on with a note of finality.
      âAlfie,â Louise stood up and touched his arm for comfort. âYou should meet with him now. I can stay for a bit or Iâll walk myself home.â She suggested in a steady voice.
      âNo.â He shook his head and checked his pocket watch before stuffing it in his pocket. âMâwalking you home now. He can wait.â
      âSir, heâs very agitated.â The young man interjected. âHeâs insisting that youâŚâ
      Alfie gave him a sharp glare. âDid I fucking mumble? Am I speaking another language? I am going to walk out them doors to bring Miss Barnes home then I will return. Only then will I speak to him. Not before. Is that fucking clear?â
      âYes, sir.â He stammered and hurried away to relay the message.
      Louise slipped on her sweater and gathered up her belongings.
      Alfie watched and waited patiently for her. âToo harsh you think?â
      She smiled and took his awaiting arm. âYouâre always too harsh, but thatâs who you need to be for a job like this.â They walked through the bakery and out the back entrance to avoid the disgruntled client. The August night was chilly and the air held warnings of fall.
      âMhm, so you secretly like it then?â Alfie asked coyly. His cane clicked against the cobblestones as they walked side by side. Louise always felt so much safer next to him. It didnât matter what time of the day it was or where they were. When she was on Alfieâs arm, she felt untouchable.
      âWhat?â Louiseâs cheeks went red. âA military captain as a boss?â
      âNo, as a lover.â He thoroughly enjoyed the small sinful smile that crossed her lips. A mischievous little angel.
      âCaptain Solomons, Iâve no clue what youâre on about.â She gave him a sly look. âI think youâre the one who wants to hold onto their military title.â
      âNot quite.â He shook his head. âFucking chucked that nonsense once I got back. Didnât want to keep âem.â
      âYour medals?â Louise asked as they approached her front stoop. âWhy?â
      He cleared his throat and shrugged. âWhat good are they here in London? Mânot Captain Solomons anymore am I? What I did there, people couldnât bother âbout could they?â His hat and the dim streetlamps cast a shadow over his face.
      âI care.â She insisted and touched his chest. âYou fought for our safety. I think thatâs honorable and should be celebrated.â Britain did what it could for its veterans. But it could never be enough. Warfare had changed and there was no going back. Now countries could drag out deadly combat for years. The men who served never made it out okay. They either lost something physically or mentally. Who would want to celebrate an event that had so drastically altered them?
      âDeath innit something to give medals for.â He replied quietly.
      Louise felt uncomfortable that she had pressed the matter. âOh, Alfie, Iâm sorry. I didnât meanâŚâ
      He smiled and took her hand to kiss her knuckles. âNothing to apologize for, love.â
      She sighed and pressed her cheek to his hand. âSometimes I just wish I could take on your pain.â
      âWhyâd you want to do something like that?â His eyebrows knit together.
      âBecause I love you.â Her hazel eyes landed softly on him. âAnd it isnât easy to see someone you love in pain.â
      âI know, but then youâd be in pain. Canât have that now, can I?â
      She smiled and let her hand slip from his. âYou have work to do, Captain Solomons.â She pecked his cheek. âYou can call me when youâre done.â
      âWonât keep you up. Might go on late.â He sighed and tugged on his beard. âDonât hafta worry âbout me.â
      âTry not to be so mean.â She teased softly and leaned against the handrail. âBe nice, Iâm sure heâs worried.â
      He sighed and pouted. âIâll try me best.â He replied begrudgingly. âWonât make any promises.â
      âFair enough.â
      âSee you tomorrow then.â He smiled and waited until she was safely inside. The lamp in the hall turned on and she gave him a loving smile through the window.
~~~~~~~~~
      Louise didnât give him much time to prepare. In fact, she was intending on keeping it from him for as long as she possibly could. But sheâd let it slip that her birthday was the following weekend.
      âWhatâs next Thursdayâs date, Lou?â Alfie asked when he was elbow deep in paperwork.
      âWell, Friday is the fourth, thatâs myâŚâ she sealed up instantly before the word slipped out.
      He looked up at her over his glasses. âIs your��what?â
      Louise just shook her head and shrugged.
      He gave her a confused look. âItâs your birthday?â There was a very short list of things that could finish her sentence. And he hoped she didnât mean to say it was her time of the month. He hated being sidelined for those few days.
      She bit her lip but realized Alfie had her beat. âYes.â She admitted. âMy birthday is on Friday.â
      âWell, dâya forget to tell me?â A smile softened his features. âEh? Silly lass.â
      âNot exactly.â She shrugged again and sat on the edge of his desk. âI havenât celebrated it in a while.â Her voice was sheepish through the admission. âDaniel always forgot or couldnât be bothered. I guess Iâve just learned not to expect anything for it.â
      âWell, thatâs not me.â Alfie retorted. âIf youâdâve told me-â
      âThatâs just it though, Alfie.â She touched his hand. âI didnât want you to fuss. Thereâs no reason to.â
      His lower lip jutted out. âWell, wonât fuss âbout it. Just want to make you feel special, right?â
      She shrugged and stood up. âI donât need you to spoil me.â
      âWell, âcourse Iâm going to fucking spoil you.â He replied and reached for her hand before she went back to her desk. âLou, you deserve it.â
      âWeâve talked about this before, love, I only need you.â She turned back to him and set her journal down on his desk. âYouâd be the best birthday present a girl could ever have.â
      Alfie smiled and kissed the top of her hand. âMâstill gonna spoil you.â He decided and went back to his work before she could argue with him.
      Louise sighed deeply and shook her head. âMost stubborn man in London.â She mumbled and retrieved her things. âMaybe all of Britain. Or the world!â
      He chuckled and ran his fingers down the chain of his glasses. âFucking hell, that girlâŚâ
~~~~~~~~~~~
      At his request, Louise stayed over Alfieâs place the night before her birthday. Friday morning, she woke up to a beautiful sight. Her beloved was getting dressed near the bed. He grunted quietly as he pulled on his suspenders, his broad shoulders flexing.
      Louise drew the sheets over her chest and smiled as he went about his day. âIs this my present?â She murmured.
      He startled a little and turned around. âFuck thought you were out cold.â He smiled and leaned down to kiss her. âNot your only present, love, I promise you that.â Â
      She cradled his cheeks and gave him a stern look. âAlfieâŚI told you-â
      âTrust me, Lou, I restrained myself.â He pecked her lips a few more times before withdrawing. âRight, Iâve got to head out. You, my love, have the day off. Iâll have Evelyn draw you a bath, relax today, yeah?â
      âSo Iâm supposed to just laze around your home all day?â Louise propped her cheek up to watch him pull on his waistcoat. âWaiting for you to return?â She smiled.
      âWell, itâs your place now too, love.â He informed her casually. He pocketed his watch and reached for his hat.  Â
      âWhat?â Louise sat up in shock. âAlfie?â
      âThatâs one present.â He gave her a playful look. âMânot paying your rent anymore because Iâd like to have you here with me. If thatâs alright?â He sat down on the bed next to her and sheepishly clasped his hands together. âSorta more of a present to myself.â He admitted.
      She bit back an overjoyed smile. âYou want me to come live with you?â She wrapped her arms around him and rested her chin on his shoulder.
      ââCourse. Have you around all the time? Sâfucking heaven, innit?â He touched her hand and let her kiss his cheek. âAnd, whenever we like, weâve got a place to escape to as well.â
      âWhereâs that?â It was impossible to hide the smile. The news was like a dream to her. Spending more time with Alfie was nothing less than a dream come true for Louise.
      âMargate, the cottage we stayed at. You liked it a lot, yeah?â He answered, happy to make her so excited. It felt like it was his main purpose at that moment was to make her as happy as possible. The more he could make her smile, the more satisfied he felt.
      âYou bought it?â Louiseâs eyes lit up. âAlfie! I don't even know what to say.â
      He laughed and wrapped an arm around her. âTold you, love, you deserve everything.â He murmured into the crook of her neck. âWould give you the fucking world if I could.â
      âYou have, you already have.â
~~~~~~~~~~~
      Alfie promised a relaxing day for Louise and he didnât fall short. After taking the morning for herself, she took Cyril for a long walk. When she returned, she found her things already brought to the flat. She also discovered a new dress waiting on the bed along with a note from Alfie. She took her time getting ready for her night with him. Evelyn helped her, doing her curls and babbling on about Ishmael bringing her flowers. Then she rambled on about how much happier Alfie seemed now that Louise was in his life. The young woman was intent that the two would marry and have many children in the near future. For the finishing touch, Alfie had gotten her a silver gown that glimmered in the light. It made her feel divine, especially when Alfie returned home and saw her in it. He was speechless for a bit until he let out a âfucking hellâ like clockwork.
      âOne more thing.â He turned her around so he could carefully place a necklace over her collarbone.
      Louise held the necklace and gasped softly. âAlfieâŚâ Clear and pure sapphire stones decorated the silver chain. Â
      âDo you like it?â He rested his hands on her shoulders once the necklace was clasped. "Reminded me of the dress you wore when we first went out together."
      The sentimental meaning made her heart skip a beat. âItâs too much but I love it.â She murmured and kissed him firmly. âAlright, Mr. Solomons, take me out on the town.â
~~~~~~~~~~
      âEvening, Mr. Solomons.â The man at the door greeted him politely, giving a nod of respect.
      âBenjamin, how are ya? Wifeâs well I trust?â He cleared his throat and went to help Louise out of her coat.
      Louise watched Alfie socialize. It was a rare sight to see. He usually went to parties or bars in a manner of business. And business interactions usually didnât go well, threats were abundant. But now here he was chatting to the man like nothing sheâd ever seen before. Louise thought he was always guarded in public.
      âHis wife runs a great charity, wonderful really.â He told Louise. âShould have you meet her, sheâs a lovely woman, this olâ bastardâs lucky to have her, innit he?â
      Benjamin laughed, the older man seemed comfortable with Alfie, unlike the majority of London. âAnd whoâs this then? Never seen you entertain before, Alfie.â He had warm eyes with good intentions. That was most likely why they got along. An untrusting man such as Alfie could find a little leeway here and there.
      âThis is Louise, very special to me. Sâher birthday, actually.â The gangster seemed more than pleased to brag about the beautiful woman on his arm. It made Louise even happier, a feat that seemed nearly impossible after all the gifts Alfie had bestowed on her.
      âWell, happy birthday, Louise. Lovely to meet a woman who can put a smile on Mr. Solomons' face.â
      Louise squeezed Alfieâs arm. âI try my best.â
      âAll on the house, as usual. You two have fun now.â
      Alfie escorted Louise inside. The bad and dance floor was packed. Loud jazz music almost shook the floor. She stuck close to him so she wouldnât bump into anyone else. He brought her past the dance floor to a staircase. The second floor overlooked the club below. It was less crowded, a few couples talking intimately at tables, some wallflowers smoking by the railing and watching the dancers below.      Â
      They found a table by a corner where it was quietest. Louise leaned over the small table, taking his hands. âThank you for everything today.â She said gratefully. "Truly, I couldn't be more blessed."
      âEverything was good?â He asked making sure she was utterly content with the day.
      âOf course, Alfie. Youâve spoiled me so much but being able to spend time with you always makes me happy.â
      âCouldnât even imagine how happy it makes me.â
      âOh really? Wanna bet?â
      âLouise?â An unfamiliar voice startled the two out of their moment.
      She looked up and dread stuck in her throat when she saw who interrupted them. âWill.â She was in shock to see the man her parents intended for her to marry so many years ago. They hadnât spoken since Louise eloped with Daniel.
      Now he was older, wore an expensive-looking suit, was clearly drunk, and had a petite blonde by his side. It was clear he'd remained in the elite lifestyle and wore it like a badge of honor. Always going out, throwing around money, and draining the trust fund on expensive cars and horses.
      âLouise Barnes.â He shook his head, looking amused at the very sight of her. âTess, this is the girl I was telling you about. From Surrey.â
      âOh!â The blondeâs eyes widened and she giggled. âSo, nice to meet you.â
      Louise felt Alfieâs hand tighten and his eyes narrowed. It was about to get ugly and Louise wasn't sure Will knew what he was getting himself into.
      âUm, Alfie, this is Will. He was a friend of my family.â She introduced awkwardly. Sheâd told him about her betrothal but they never spoke any further about it. It was a part of her life she would've rather kept locked up. Instead, she was forced to relive it.
      âWell, Iâd argue I was a bit more than that, Louise. We were meant to be married. For years our parents were planning it.â Will laughed with no attempt to hide his malice. âThen we all found out sheâs gone and ran off with a drunkard.â
      Willâs girlfriend tittered along with him like it was the funniest thing sheâd ever heard. A rich girl throwing her money away instead of relying on it until the day she died.
      âHow is he then? Howâs your husband? What's his name again?"
      âHeâs passed. Iâve remarried.â Louise lifted her chin and looked him deadset in the eyes.
      âIs that so? Louise Barnes managed to find another low life?â
      âItâs Solomons now, actually.â Alfie stood up, adjusting the rings on his fingers. âThatâll be Mrs. Solomons to you, mate.â He looked up from under the grim of his hat, casting a menacing shadow over his face. âWill, is it? Nameâs Alfie Solomons.â
      Realization struck Willâs face. The young male aristocrats were well aware of Britainâs underworld. They often paid for protection, sold their liquor at bars they owned for fun and used bookies for sport. Alfie Solomons was a name on the list of people not to fuck with. It didnât matter how much money you had or from which family you came from. But a man full of gin loses a sense of danger and will tempt an enraged bear.
      âWell, she always wanted to fuck the bad boys, didnât she?â Will laughed and patted Alfie on the arm.
      The gangster plastered on a fake smile and laughed along. A ploy he used to throw off his victims before he set in the final blow. âAw Lou, heâs just a joker, innit he? Canât imagine why you passed him up, yeah, real catch.â
      She just shrugged, waiting for the switch to flip. It was mildly amusing to watch now that she had learned the psychological strategies he used against opponents. It was as if she were watching a sporting match, a chess game of intimidation. And it helped that Will deserved what was coming to him.
      âFucking hilarious. How âbout this one, mate?â Alfie grabbed Will by the arm with an iron grip. âYou keep blabbering on âbout my wife, gossiping like an old lady? Yeah? And Iâll fucking rip your tongue out an then shove it down your fucking throat.â
      The smile dropped off Willâs face. His girlfriend clutched at his arm, the two were stunned by the threat.
      âRight. Now, since itâs me wifeâs birthday I wonât let you bother her again. So if I see you in my fucking line of vision youâll lose an eye. That seem fair?â Alfie sized Will up, squinting his eyes at him for a moment. âYeahâŚmake that both your eyes. Now fuck off.â
      They didnât linger long and Alfie sat down with a heavy grunt. âFucking lowlife.â He muttered. âSorry, âbout that, love.â He partially regretted making a scene in front of Louise on her birthday. But he wasnât about to let Will get away with the remarks either.
      Louise bit back a smile and pecked his cheek. âYouâre lovely.â She murmured affectionately.
      He raised an eyebrow in surprise. âYeah? What makes you say that?â
      âYou stand up for me.â She moved closer to him, pressing her forehead to his temple so he could hear her over the music. âMen like that are spineless but youâŚyouâre something else. And I love you for that.â
      He smiled and took her hand in his again. âWell youâre a woman standing up for, ainât ya? A husbandâs gotta look out for his wife?â
      A blush spread over her face. âSorry about that. It just sort of popped out.â She admitted shyly and fiddled with the collar of his shirt.
      âNah, sâalright. It were nice to say, werenât it? Just didnât know you were thinking âbout stuff like that, yeah?â He lifted a hand to the nape of her neck, his rough fingers tracing down her spine.
      She shivered under his touch and cuddled closer. The distance between them was unacceptable in her view. âEvelyn mentioned it and I guessâŚâ She shrugged slightly. âIt sounded nice.â
      âYeah, did sound nice.â Alfieâs heart ached for her. He wanted to give her everything. But he was unsure if he could promise a marriage. He didnât know if that was a chance he was willing to take on her safety.
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Lily Collins on overshadowing dad Phil, beating anorexia and starring in the BBC's Les MisĂŠrables
As one of the defining voices of the 1980s and a man who remains one of the worldâs bestselling artists, it would have been easy for Collins to overshadow his multitalented daughterâs success. Certainly, when I first interviewed Lily five years ago for the romcom Love, Rosie, she was still being defined not just by her famous father, but the Audrey Hepburn-esque looks that had won her modelling contracts as a teenager living in LA.
Since we last saw each other, Lily has redefined herself on her own terms. And when UK audiences are treated to her nuanced, poignant portrayal of Cosetteâs desperate mother, Fantine, in the lavish new six-part BBC adaptation of Victor Hugoâs Les MisĂŠrables, they wonât see Phil Collinsâs daughter but a remarkable British-born talent at the top of her game.
âI had a few friends in the musical version, and I was so keen to play this part in whatâs a very different adaptation,â says Lily of the role that won Anne Hathaway an Oscar â a role she begged producers to be allowed to audition for, so desperate was she to be involved.
That the director, Tom Shankland, had decided against his being a musical adaptation meant the all-star cast â including Dominic West as Jean Valjean, David Oyelowo as Javert and Olivia Colman as Madame ThĂŠnardier â were able to return to Hugoâs original characters, she says. âAnd getting to work through the whole arc of Fantineâs life was incredible. Although in fact the death scene was filmed on day two,â she adds with a side smile. âSo it was a case of, âHi, nice to meet you â Iâm about to dieâ.â
Crushed and betrayed by a pitiless society that demands the most from those to whom it gives the least, Fantineâs character is emblematic of so much. During the six-month shoot in Belgium and northern France, Lily found filming in minus-13C Brussels gruelling (âI grew up in England, so I should know about cold â but this was something elseâ), but says it helped put her in the right state of mind.
âMy lips started to go blue and I began to shake. Even in my breaks I wouldnât keep my jacket on for too long because I had to be at a level of discomfort that I hadnât experienced before.â And when a degraded and desperate Fantine is dragged through the snow wearing minimal clothing, âI was able to let go and be that vulnerable. Itâs those parts that are the most fulfilling: thatâs when you can see what youâre made of.â
Lilyâs early roles were hardly inconsequential. She starred alongside Sandra Bullock in the Oscar-winning 2009 film The Blind Side, and with Julia Roberts in Mirror Mirror in 2012. But it wasnât until 2013 with her portrayal of Clary Fray in the film adaptation of Cassandra Clareâs bestselling cult fantasy series The Mortal Instruments that Lily seemed to come into her own.
There was a concerted move towards tragic, multi-layered heroines like heartbroken Cecilia Brady in Amazon Primeâs The Last Tycoon in 2016, and recovering anorexic Ellen in Marti Noxonâs To the Bone the following year, and I wonder whether it was the writing of her startlingly honest 2017 memoir, Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Me, that marked the start of Lilyâs real evolution.
Five years ago a sweet, wholesome and reticent young woman in dungarees and Dr Martens boots had assured me that prudence had âalways been my natural feelingâ. And yet, outing herself as someone real and flawed in her memoir â someone who had suffered from a debilitating eating disorder as well as self-confidence and relationship issues â was anything but prudent. âWriting the book helped me let go of things I was holding on to emotionally,â Lily says. âAnd in order to take on the baggage of the characters that I wanted to play I had to let go of my own.â
That she chose to play a recovering anorexic in To the Bone the same year sheâd detailed her own illness in such detail â the diet-pill and laxative addiction, the bingeing and purging that started at the age of 16 and went on into her 20s â could be seen as brave, foolhardy or both. But her parents (Lilyâs mum is American socialite Jill Tavelman) didnât try to stop her, she says. âIn fact, they were more like, âWow, youâre writing a book!â And it turned out to be a form of therapy,â she insists.
âLuckily, we shot To the Bone in LA, I worked with a nutritionist to prepare for the part responsibly, and my mum was on set with me, so it was a way for me to harness something that had truly controlled my life for such a long time. Being able to turn the tables and really have control was amazing. Finally I could say to myself: âI am living my life and this is not going to be a part of my story from now on.â Iâll be 30 in March and Iâm so glad that I dealt with these things in my 20s, because now I can get excited about whatâs to come.â
As part of her research she went to an Anorexics and Bulimics Anonymous group, and an LA clinic for eating disorders, âwhere they gave me a lot of the factual information to understand the basics of the disorderâ. Does she feel her illness is firmly behind her now â or is it important to remain vigilant? âWell itâs never going to be erased because itâs part of who you are, but it doesnât define how I live my life daily any more,â she says. âWhen I was going through it, I couldnât imagine there being a day when I didnât think about it. So really itâs about seeing myself as a priority.â
Sheâs in no doubt that doing To the Bone and Unfiltered in the same year was worth it in terms of getting the message out there. âWeâre all flawed,â she shrugs. âGiving a loud voice to a subject that people are often very ashamed of really inspired me to pour myself into characters that have something to say.â
Her accent may be pure La-La Land, but Lilyâs got British steel, our madcap sense of humour â and a love of Topshop. And when she lands at Heathrow and drives out into the country towards her fatherâs Surrey home, âThatâs when I feel most myself,â she says. And yet only-child Lily was just five when her mother moved them back to California, where she was from, and away from the very public fallout of her and Collinsâs divorce.
It was the musicianâs second marital break-up and the press feasted on every acrimonious detail of the split, from the fax her father reportedly sent Tavelman terminating their 10-year marriage (he denied it) to the reported ÂŁ17 million he was forced to pay out. But although Lily admits in her book that there was âangerâ towards her father and a âterrible disconnectâ between them in the subsequent period â Collins went on to marry Swiss translator Orianne Cevey, 20 years his junior, in 1999, whom he later divorced and remarried â she is now very close to the 67-year-old and her four half-siblings. Two of them, Simon and Joely (whose mother is Collinsâs first wife, Andrea Bertorelli) live in Canada, and two, Nicholas and Matthew (sons of Orianne), in Geneva, but the family all assembled in London for their fatherâs 60th birthday.
Lily remembers the advice Phil gave her when she started out: âFor every positive review you read youâll probably find two negative ones, so if youâre proud of something, donât let anyone take that away.
âAnd itâs true that being proud of the work matters more than anything,â she says, adding that growing up immersed in the industry allowed her to âsee the pros and the cons of it all and really understand what happens when you decide youâre going to be in the public eye. Because of that I feel like I already have this armour built in, which I can use at any moment.â
The armour went on when I asked about her ex-boyfriend, actor Jamie Campbell Bower, and an alleged fling with Zac Efron five years ago â and sheâs not about to tell me who sheâs dating now. But as well as her book, Instagram â on which Lily has almost 12 million followers â has opened her up in other ways. âI used to be quite anti social media,â she says. âBut after the book I found that this hugely supportive community was forming around the world.â Anyone who assumed that the gorgeous LA actress whose circle of friends includes the actors Eddie Redmayne, Jaime Winstone and Sam Claflin couldnât connect with ordinary people, âI wanted to prove wrong,â she says.
Instagram has also proved to be a great platform for Lily to showcase her love of fashion and photography. The Dr Martens are now long gone and today she loves mixing up pieces by Givenchy, Miu Miu and Chanel with vintage brands and high-street finds. âIn Brussels there were so many amazing vintage shops,â she says. âI found some incredible old adidas and Fila jackets. But Iâm constantly changing when it comes to fashion.â
Many of these experiments have been exhaustively covered by the fashion bloggers who dissect paparazzi pictures of Lily out and about in LA, where she lives â âwhich can be frustrating when Iâm just going to the gymâ, but is an inevitable part of any coverage involving red carpets.
Asked whether she minds the âWho are you wearing?â question that many A-listers have railed against post #AskHerMore, she deliberates for a moment. âWell, I like to give credit where creditâs due, and if Iâm wearing something a designer has created, they deserve the credit. One hopes thereâs going to be more than one question â and if it is just the one, Iâd rather be asked what Iâm doing there.â
To see how quickly her industry has changed since #MeToo went viral just over a year ago has been fascinating, she says. âAnd I feel very fortunate that the films Iâve been in have always involved very strong independent women â whether itâs Julia Roberts, Sandra Bullock,Julianne Moore, Annette Bening or Jennifer Connelly: they all took me under their wing.â
Watching #MeToo filter down into other industries has been one of the most wondrous things about it, she enthuses. âBut whereas this year has been about trying to level the playing field, I keep hoping that one day we wonât have to start conversations with, âWell, itâs great because sheâs a womanâŚââ
In her next big screen role, Lily will star as Edith Tolkien â the wife and muse of Lord of the Rings creator JRR Tolkien â opposite Nicholas Hoult in Dome Karukoskiâs biopic, Tolkien. âAnd what an amazing experience to shoot in Liverpool with someone like Nicholas, and be able to play a character that really inspired a series of stories I grew up loving.â But prior to that, and also due out next year â she filmed Joe Berlingerâs Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile, in which she plays the long-term girlfriend of mass-murderer Ted Bundy, Elizabeth Kloepfer â with whom she spent time.
âThe preparation to that â and meeting Elizabeth and her daughter â was so unsettling that I kept being woken up by all these images,â she says. âAnd I had tried not to read the harshest and most visceral information out there because in truth my character didnât know anything, and the story is from her perspective. But itâs such a fascinating story â and in the end storytelling is what connects us all.â
Les MisĂŠrables begins on 30 December at 9pm on BBC One (x)
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