#this isn't really anyone's fault. the person who used to organize for that group to meet died and no one really stepped up

[howtobeamagicalgirl]

I might have to start living my life differently. Bc this sucks.

[allwayswildchild]

You can read it on AO3 or under the cut!

It's been two months since I disappeared from my world. It's been two months since I've seen or heard from Zelda and I hate that fact.

It's been two months since I joined the chain and I'm still adjusting. It's weird waking up and not seeing you next to me. It's weird not knowing where you are or if you're safe. I hate the fact that I can't protect you right now. I hate the fact you don't even know where I am right now. I hate the fact I had to leave without saying goodbye or at least saying where I was going.

I know you wouldn't read this and that's fine. I'm not sure why I'm writing this, but I think it will make me feel better about not seeing you. I know you wouldn't read this but I at least want to explain where I've been and how it's been.

If you haven't already guessed it I got sucked into another adventure! Wooo! I'm so excited about this, it's not like I died on that last one or anything but I don't think hylia cares about that. On this adventure I'm traveling with eight other past heroes. You'll probably recognize a few of them! I would too if I paid attention to your ranting but sometimes it just goes on for too long and I stop paying attention. Not my fault.

There's Time, Twilight, Warriors, Sky, Legend, Hyrule, Four, Wind and me. Those are nicknames. In reality we're all named Link. And that's why we're called the Chain. Wind came up with it. Everyone's nickname is their hero title. So like the Hero of Twilight or the Hero of Time. Mine is the hero of the Wilds. Fitting right. I know if you were reading this you would be uncontrollably laughing right now because of my title.

Time is the oldest. He's like the leader of the group. He  seems very stoic and serious on the outside. The chain goes to him when they need advice or have some sort of problem. Even though he's the oldest he still acts like a child on the inside. If you look close enough you can see the mischievous glint in his eye. Especially if he's about to play a prank on one of the boys. He has said some weird things at times also. Once in casual conversation he said that he fought the moon. No one could tell if he was being serious or not. I haven't really talked to him that much but he seems like a good guy, if not a little bit mischievous.

Twilight is unique. I don't quite know what to like about him. He apparently grew up on a farm in a place called Ordain, which is outside of Hyrule. Since he grew up on a farm he has a lot of experience with animals and horses. It seems he loves being around farms and urban places. I don't blame him though since I'm the same way. I've talked to him more than I have Time but still not a lot. Thinking of it I haven't really talked to the chain lot. Oops.

I don't really like Warriors. I don't know why but I just don't. Whenever I'm by him I don't talk and I flinch whenever he tries to touch or talk to me. I feel bad that I do this but it's not like I can change it. I think before the calamity there was a person like him, who I might have feared. I don't know. I don't have any memories of anyone like him though. Warriors is a Captain in his Hyrule army. Wasn't I a Captain once? I can't remember. He is good at making decisions. Him and time usually are the ones making the battle plans.

Speaking of battle plans, I forgot to write why we are even on this quest. To be honest I don't know. I don't think any of the chain does either. We have some theories though! Not very good ones.

One theory is that Hylia just hates us and likes to see us suffer. It's a very compelling theory, probably the best one yet! I know I haven't written about him yet but it was Legend that made this theory. Which isn't surprising if you knew him. He probably has the most hatred for Hylia out of anyone.

Which I'm not surprised with how many adventures he's been on but that's for a later section.

The second theory is that we're getting together to defend a villain or something like that. A "big bad" if you would. This theory was made by Warriors. I'm not surprised cause Legend and Warriors usually are the opposite; they fight a lot. Being honest this is the most logical theory. There is some evidence against this theory though! One thing is what villain would need ten of Hylias heros to defeat? We all have defeated separate villains by ourselves, so what villain needs all of us? And why can't Hylia do it BY HERSELF!

Anyways! The next person I will talk about is Legend, seeing as I already talked about him. Legend has a very interesting personality. He acts like his is really mean and doesn't care but I feel like know it's an act. He and Warriors fight a lot. They are just very opposite people. He also has A TON of rings! They are all magical too! He also doesn't wear pants..... He only wears shorts. Even if it's freezing. He's also been on the most adventures. I don't know how many but when Time said he had been on about 3 before, Legend muttered and I quote "That would have been nice." I don't think anyone else heard it but I was right next to him and I have really good hearing.

Wind is next! He is the youngest of all of us. I think he is sixteen. Which sucks! He said he started his journey when he was fourteen and finished it when he was fifteen. So he had a year to rest, which is not a lot but it's better than nothing. Some people like Time had a lot of time between their last journey and this one. Lol, I didn't even mean to do that! Anyways Wind is very energetic and curious about everything. He likes exploring and well, the ocean. Seeing as his world is all oceans with islands. He talks about his world all the time! And he's really loud, so you can't ignore him! He also talks about his family a lot, he lives with his sister and grandmother. I can't remember if I had a sister. Or a family. Huh? I can't remember anything about a family. I'll ask you next time I see you. If I ever do.

Without further ado is Sky! He is the one who holds the master sword! Apparently he was also the one who forged it. Which means either him or Four is first because everyone else has had the master sword on their journeys. Except for Four, he says he had a different sword but didn't elaborate when we asked him about it. Sky said he thinks he was the first but didn't say why. Sky talks about his Zelda a lot. I think they are together but I don't want to ask. He also does woodworking. He likes to randomly start carving wood. He just sits down and starts on a random thing. He mostly does animals like birds. They are always really pretty!

Anyways the second to last is Hyrule! And yes that is his title The Hero Of Hyrule. It kinda sucks that we have to call him a kingdom and it has gotten confusing before when we are talking to someone that's not the chain. Let's just say it takes a while to convince them that's his name. He is an adventurer at heart. He also is terrible at staying on the path. Legend has to drag him back whenever we are walking. He gets distracted very easily and doesn't even realize it. He loves exploring and he's also the group medic! He has more training in that medicine than most of us. I don't have much to say about him to be honest. He seems like a very fun person!

Last but not least Four. Yes, like the number. I have no clue why that's his title but I wouldn't ask him. He talks to himself a lot. He's also really short. Like he's shorter than Wind that's why everyone thought he was the youngest. He did not like it when we assumed that. He's also really smart, but he doesn't really talk to other people that much. I don't know, I haven't really talked to him. I've probably talked to him the second least, other than Warriors. That's all the chain!

Another thing I forgot to mention is they all suck at cooking! I'm the designated cook! Which I'm fine with but if I'm sick or injured, everyone will get food poisoning! I swear four burns all the food he makes and Hyrule adds bugs and random stuff, so it's uneditable! Twilight can make stew and that's it! He doesn't even add enough spices or he puts too much spices! There is not in between! Sky can only make pumpkin soup! That is the only thing he knows what to make! Like yeah it's good, but pumpkins are hard to find! And in the one who gets ALL the ingredients! Legend just doesn't know how to! Before he just ate the separate ingredients! Like he cooked the meat and ate it, then ate the carrots, and ate the cooked potatoes! Not even together! And not spices! And it's all over or under cooked! He doesn't know when it's actually cooked! Warriors can make food but it's ONLY military food. With no seasonings and it's two meals. And that's it. Time is the best between everyone besides me. He knows how to cook very basic food. Probably because his wife taught him. Oh wait! Oops I forgot to mention he is married! The only one of the chain, I think. He speaks the world of her. Late nights when I'm making dinner he just sits and talks about her talks about her to the air or anyone listening.

Well that's all I have to say right now. I wish I wish with you right now. I really miss you right now. Sky and Time aren't helping when they talk about their partners. I wonder how you're doing right now. I wonder how you're doing without me. I hope you're doing well. I hope I see you soon!

Love you, Hero of the Wild.

[eddywoww]

I live in a more conservative area in the US. My family isn't, but whatever. Being LGBT was looked down upon in this area, my parents made sure to tell me it was ok and people were close minded (hell they even left the church they went to and started their own). They were great parents.

That being said the surrounding area was not. Got bullied in school for being gay, even though I simply was just focused on academics. I wanted an A more than I wanted the D am I right? Hm. It frustrated me because no one even asked and I was straight. This went on from when I was 10 to 17, when I finally graduated and got out of that area. The bullying was intense, from something as simple as name calling to having group projects turned in without my name but slurs on it to getting physically pushed around and shoved.

I went to college and met some cool people. Went to a pride parade as an ally. Started learning about different labels. Proclaimed to be demisexual with a desire for men because I still didn't really have any sexual desire and again, focused on school.

When I was 21 I moved to an entire new area for my job. Met a girl in her 30s who has a kid (12 or 13 at the time I dont remember) who came out as nonbinary and pan. Good for them! The woman was an "ally" except-

Tried forcing me to come out. Many times. Put me in secret uncomfortable situations. Some highlights of things she did were: take me to a gay bar without telling me thats where we were and then paying someone to kiss me and then kept asking if I realized I was gay because I didn't push the person away (I was shocked), after I claimed I was demisexual claimed that I had repressed my sexuality because society inherently tells you to be straight and that I was truly a lesbian, would claim I was a virgin if I never slept with a man because a woman couldn't take that so if i had "religious trauma" and wouldn't sleep with anyone based on keeping virginity i could with a woman and be fine (which I dont have any, my parents formed that church and were all inclusive and its a safe space hell they even organized pride events before the town did), and the worst of all got me drunker then I've ever been to the point I could barely stand and left me with a guy who had a crush on me who kept coming onto me. She talked to him and I saw her wink at him and she left me with this dude who got too handsy if you know what I mean. Nothing under the clothes happened thank God, and really it was my own fault for drinking so much at her place *she had many people over, I actually drank less then other people but still*. I asked why she left me with him and she said she was tired, then later said she wasn't surprised he tried anything and then said "well you're definitely gonna be gay now and not want to be with a man".

I left that area behind as my career progressed and it hit me, damn she was kinda fucked up. Kissed a few people and realized hold on I do have a sexual drive hello, and I dont have to get to know people first to have it?? Not demi then. Cool! Realised that the woman kinda fucked me up. I'm doing therapy which...is ok. But I got on Tumblr and have been on

And I've met some cool people. I've realized huh I guess a straight person doesn't think about boobs and vaginas while they get off. The dicks made sense, but the rest? And it hit me Holy shit im bi?? I think??

In my mind, being LGBT was okay but ME oh no suddenly it was the worst thing in the world. And im realizing its okay for me. Idk why I thought it wasn't except for the intense bullying. One thing that made me realize was everyone on tumblr. Like I said I met some cool people. I havent sent everyone a message because I want to be anonymous still. But you're one of the people who have helped me realize its ok. It is okay for me! So thank you for that. One of your fics really helped when I was first struggling with the realization and...thank you. It may not seem like a big thing to you, but its changed my life.

Thank you so much for sending me this. Like actually truly.

First of all, I’m so sorry for the situation with your ex friend. I can’t stand when people need to push and push to get the reaction THEY want, it sickens me deeply. Im sorry you went through that and I’m so happy you’re in therapy and that you’ve discovered yourself now.

It actually IS big to me when I hear about bisexual people accepting themselves. I don’t talk about it here much but I too grew up in a conservative area. I dropped out of school for bullying, etc but had the opposite story of knowing I was bisexual very young and not knowing how to word it? I just knew it was “bad” and I went to church a lot and I needed to repent for it. So I get that part in a warped way.

I think it gets to me for a very personal reason. There’s this inherent shake when you’ve been made to feel bad about your sexuality that resurfaces at random. I had an ex boyfriend who was obsessed with my sexuality in the opposite way. He was abusive and thought I was cheating constantly with my best friend, would call me a d*ke and a f*g constantly (almost always before some sort of physical abuse) and I was just deeply ashamed of my self, to the point of being biphobic at points.

What I’m getting at here is I came out after we broke up and I expected it to be this dawn of time shit because my family is accepting too! And I remember my mom getting upset and going, “Are you sure this isn’t about your breakup? Are you okay?” And I kind of just wanted to fucking scream. Or the way family members treat it like I’m divulging some sort of sexual secret. My sister coming out as bi years later really helped me. Dating someone who both did not care and didn’t want to sexualize me made it better.

In between all that, I ended up dating a girl who I could tell from the get go doesn’t see me (still now as friends) as “gay enough”. None of my struggle or my problems are the same, none of my fears are warranted, etc. that’s fine. I don’t need suffering to know who I am. What I’m trying to get at is even after years there are still tiny things that eat away at me but I’ve learned coping skills and developed friendships that make me feel so much better. And hearing stories from other people helps so much too. So thank you for telling me yours, it means a lot to me. I know you weren’t asking for a wordy response but I just woke up and I’m a sensitive bitch 😂

I’m sorry for the things you’ve gone through and I wish the world had been kinder to a young you. I’m glad you’re better now and if you ever need to message someone (if you ever choose to not be anon) I’m around ☺️💕

[autumn-foxfire]

That's definitely a rough position to be in. Who you share your home with and the home itself should be a place of comfort, and feeling attacked by the presence of other people can really ruin that. I'm sorry your home has become like this, and I would love to knock some sense into your brother's gf if I could, but unfortunately since I'm not a professional, I have no idea what the best course of action would be to prevent that growing divide and get her to be more civil. You've got a therapist right? I think? I hope, someone whose been helpful in the advice they give you, it may be best to tell them about these things. Or if you go to group therapy, other's experience might give a few ideas on what could happen in trying to mend things, which choice is better than the other depending on your unique circumstances and the personalities' of whom you're dealing with.

For now though, I will say that your bro's gf is VERY WRONG to use your mental illness as a way to attack you. Mental illness is no different than an ailment of the body, it is of no fault of our own, and that we struggle with them instead of listening to them means we need help, like anyone would go to the doctor or get prescribed medicine when they're sick, they're encouraged to do that even. They aren't blamed for it, they're expected to rest and take a day off. Your situation is no different. The mind is also an organ of the body, we all have a soul, there's two components that make up humans, physical sickness is not the only one. If those non-physical aspects of you are hurting, that is real, that is valid, that deserves recognition and compassion. I see you Foxy, and I know you're doing your best every day, the best that you are capable of on those days, and that is good. Any bit of progress that you feel you make is better than stagnation, it can be the tiniest thing ever, less than yesterday, but it isn't nothing. It's a choice that took effort and that is worth everything. And if you need a couple days to just lie down and be sad, that's fine. We all need those sometimes, can't always be up and go go go- yeah? You need those quiet and still moments. Even the ones where the world feels too heavy so that your cup doesn't spill over later on another day, you need to let them come and let them pass. The fact that you're trying to contribute to the house even with everything we hear you're struggling with is really admirable because not everyone does, you're incredible and I wish you the best in everything and that you can find peace of mind during these times. 💜

Thank you.

I've got a few things I want to discuss with my therapist when I next see them and this is definitely going to be one of them, just to see if they have any advice on how to tackle this situation so I can make my home a better environment for me. We've already discussed how the home needs to be a good place for you if you want a healthier mind and the way it is now, it's not doing me any good.

It's nice to get reminders like this, that people can see I'm trying my best. I need to be kinder to myself but it's easier said than done.

[tiger-moran]

I don't actually know who coined these terms or how they intended them to be used but then if they are actually saying essentially that everyone is using them wrong then that is sort of possibly indicating that maybe the terms are not actually very useful, if they're so open to misuse and misinterpretation, and I know it's not the fault of the original person if then vast numbers of people run with something they create only to misuse it in some major way, but that misuse is still happening. I mean I don't think I even fundamentally disagree that they could have occasionally had some real use, if they'd been used correctly always.

I think one of the major problems with them though is like I said earlier, where do you draw the line, and how do you decide which variety of transphobia + misogyny is in effect 'real' or 'valid' and which isn't? And transphobia manifests in so many ways and a lot of it isn't actually dependent at all on what gender you really are or what gender you were labelled at birth or what genitalia or reproductive organs or whatever you actually have, it's just thrown at trans people in general and the harm it causes is frequently pretty much the same regardless of what the person's gender is. Transphobes think we're all freaks or all mentally ill and many of them don't actually even know what a trans woman is and what a trans man is (and anything outside the binary, well they haven't got a hope in hell of getting that).

If people overall were not seemingly so intent on using TMA to mean trans women (although even that sometimes seems very conditional, on which trans women they actually include under that. I have seen trans women dismissed as "TMEs" just for using the ""wrong"" pronouns for themself or for standing up for trans men for example) and TME to mean 'every other trans person who is not a binary trans woman and let's ignore the fact that cis people exist' and did not consistently (at best) gloss over that so much transphobia hurts all trans people (yes even much of the stuff that the transphobe thinks they are only directing at trans women) (and also that it quite often harms other people who aren't even trans, like some intersex people or butch cis women for instance), and if the terms also weren't being used far too often to invalidate and insult other trans people (the sheer contempt and hatred that comes across in the way some people talk about "TMEs", not even "TME people" or something, too many people do throw around the term in such a dehumanising way with so much vitriol), maybe they would have some use in some contexts. But I've just never seen people using them that way except for those people who are explicitly criticising the way the terms have ended up being used.

But also I still absolutely resent terms which try to force all trans people into a new binary, this really does hurt non binary people. I also don't see how creating divisions (and often very artificial ones at that, trying to force in a divide where no such divide actually really exists) is helpful overall. Sure there are always going to be valid reasons to have spaces or resources or whatever for specific sub-groups, where different people have different needs, but this overall thing a lot of people seem to have fixated on where we have to divide everyone up, where we have to put these very specific labels on you and we have to put everyone into these neat boxes and if you don't fit exactly well we'll still shove you into it anyway... how is that helping anyone? I know that's not just a trans specific thing and it's something I have commented on before about how it's happening with for example asexual and aromantic people (trying to force a split between them to the point where some people act like asexuality and aromanticism have absolutely nothing in common), or bi and pan people, or gay/lesbian and mspec people. But it's happening with trans people too and just... I don't get how people can think this dividing everyone up and separating them and shoving them into these little neatly labelled boxes is a good thing, how is that not just actually often ending up pitting one oppressed group against another and also weakening what was meant to be a coalition of people with similar experiences standing by each other and supporting each other? And I do think this trying to foist labels on people is encouraging not only division but antagonism and hostility between the groups, when in reality, we are not enemies, and we have so much more in common with each other than we have differences between us. (I don't actually believe at all this is originating from trans people, it is cis transphobes starting this off, creating these divides, creating new insulting terms for us or misappropriating our own language. Unfortunately too many trans people are absorbing it and running with it though for one reason or another.)

(I also do think the way some people sling around terms like 'TMEs' or other terms... it's a lot to do with them wanting to find an 'acceptable' target to hit out at, one that realistically is not going to be able to hit back hard, but in particular often I think it's them wanting to regurgitate all the misogyny they've been fed throughout their lives, but knowing that they can't really attack cis women because a/ they're cis and have power and privilege for that and b/ because they'd probably be rightfully called out for misogyny if they did start saying hateful things about women. So instead they turn on the 'women-lite' people instead. Which basically means all non binary people, all trans men, even trans women sometimes if they're not trans women in the 'right' way. I think that's another reason why this stuff gives me such bad vibes because the terms have been weaponised and I know there's this undercurrent of other bigotry underneath it.)

I think I'm getting too old for this shit really though. I'm not even that old but I'm already so tired of seeing new generations coming up and each time because they are hurting and because they can't in turn hurt their actual oppressors, like the cis people creating transphobic laws or those in the medical profession stopping them getting medical care or celebrities with huge wealth and influence, they turn on others in what is supposed to be their own community instead, lashing out at them, trying to deny those people have also been harmed, completely invalidating them even. One generation seems to grow out of it but then another springs up and finds new ways to lash out at others around them and creates or appropriates (or misappropriates maybe) these new words and insults they can sling at people they should be standing in solidarity with. I mean there's always going to be some hatred for a specific group and there are always going to be some people who decide some other group within the LGBT+ community is their enemy but I don't mean just this general hatred, I mean like all these 'discourse' trends too, where people pick a specific marginalised group to attack and invalidate and try to exclude and how that keeps circling round onto new targets. Like we've had ""ace discourse""", we've had people turning on pan people, we've had it with non binary people. For instance not even that long ago I could not find a single MLM positivity blog on here that bothered to remember trans people exist that was not run by a truscum trans man who hated and excluded or invalidated non binary people. Then people started to try to claim essentially that cis gay men aren't actually oppressed. Now it's people hating "TMEs" and using terms like that, amongst others, to misgender and attack and invalidate others and their oppression and abuse. It is just... it's so tiring, seeing this stuff keep repeating over and over, and new generations of queer people getting sucked in to mistrusting and resenting and hating their fellow queer people and blaming them for everything instead of blaming their actual oppressors, when I know full well that this is something which absolutely originated outside the queer community from people who hate all of us and want all of us to not exist. I know this is kind of getting away from the initial point quite a bit but the way I have seen such terms as 'TME' weaponised and used against people, it's symptomatic of these broader issues and it just really is exhausting to keep seeing it happen over and over again.

I think a lot of people on here fundamentally misunderstand the TMA/TME dichotomy. TMA or TME isn't a label you are designated based on how you look, it's an identifier of the forms of oppression you face. It's no different to me that using terms like "person with a penis" or "person who can get pregnant."

Do some people use the terms in bad faith? Yes. People can use neutral terms in bad ways. If I say "all people with penises are horrible creeps who prey on others", that's clearly using a neutral term in a bad faith way to invoke a mental image based on a history of bigotry.

But that doesn't mean the term is inherently useless or bad.

[shadowlight25]

Am I trippin or did archer girl's bro still move after namra had snapped his neck?🤔 I almost feel like he could be one of the others who she is talking about in the end. And that's why baresu smiles at the end. Bc personally I feel that cheonsang is not dead!! But they won't show us that right away if that makes sense. So its another familiar face. All the other people we know in the group died as regular zombies being bombed. She also mentions it was other students who managed to get away from the school so new characters?!? I thought they were all dead besides them lol. They must have survived on dead animals since they show us the ones on the street...Gwinam has to be dead bc his arc already finished and it would be tiring to still have him as a villain. Him being on top of cheonsang is the reason why the latter lived. No body no corpse! All we see is the name tag and a hand that could be anyone's. You can't tell with all that ash.

Why the heck did they never show cheonsang's dad?! That made no sense and it's like he didn't even mention him. Only the mom was put importance.

No slander towards Jimin for abandoning girlie!! She got scared and the zombie was coming straight at them. Unless the leg is broken than she should have tried to get up on her own. Weakness will only get you, the other person or both killed. I disliked people talking about karma when she could have still died regardless if she did the good deed. The only person who got deserved karma was nayeon. Sadly Jimin became the thing she wanted to kill.

Nayeon....tell me why her death was so weak bruh. They show us the whole flashback of the teacher telling her to go back to save the others and she dies three seconds later. I wanted her to get close to the gang to get them snacks at least and then she could die. I thought she would come back as hambie.

Why did they kill the dad of onjo so quickly...I couldn't even feel really nothing when he died or the reunion bc they gave us no time to savor the moment. But he did get her to safety even tho I feel like he could have avoided getting bit and lasting a bit more. It's like the show wanted to take turns hurting onjo and then cheonsang like....

The new enemy will be the military or whatever else organization that one man is a part of. He is sus and I think they are gonna test on the teachers son/wife to possibly create hambies of their own to combat the virus. The crazy hambie chic is nowhere to be found....

I think archer girl's bro shouldn't have died yet either....it should have been pink sweater girl bc of how clumsy she is. It wasn't necessary for them to all the lose someone very close. This also was a short lived reunion.

They never did show us the teacher again...he has to be a hambie.

Fuck ms park!! There is not excusing that blatant undeserved murder. I don't care if your the teacher. I hate how she let that slide. Don't care she died.

I think the only time I was mad at namra was when she was snapping necks and didn't mention this to the rest bc it seemed as if she noticed how to kill them the right way.

How the heck that baby survive that long 🤣 and with out making a peep.

Oh and what was the thing with onjo thinking stuff was salty?!?

Im sorry but baresu was goofy for wanting to get bit by namra like what 🤣... There is no guarantee u will be a hambie and you are one of the most valuable in the group.

Boy on rooftop is trash!! I hope he actually turned into a regular zombie. It's not the rest of the worlds fault that you were bullied. He was ok until he didn't say nothing about the rest of the kids behind the door. The crazy girlie too. She fucked up the chance for the kids to leave. The teacher also isn't excused for causing this shit all to happen.

Bring on season 2!!

[shyrose57]

Brothers anon back again after like a week, sorry about that. But as a sorry I worked out a bit more with the Great SMP town! Also idk if you know but the Brothers au link is broken on your pinned post, I tried using it to skip to the questions I had yet to answer and it didn't work. 

1: The idols people could choose from where Technoblade, Sapnap, George, Ranboo, Bad, Fundy, Karl, Phil, Tommy, Tubbo, Sam, Wilbur, and Eret. People who choose Technoblade or Sam often become the guards of Mizu and those who keep laws inforced. The difference between following Technoblade or Sam is, for Technoblade you focus purely on fighting and less about laws, you also learn more about history. While for Sam you focus much more on laws and even restraining and helping people (If its confusing think of Sam followers as the police and Technoblade followers as SWAT). Technoblade followers are also sometimes called to provide protection during resource gathering missions. For Karl you tend to learn story tellings and study writings, Karl followers are also the main librarians and take care of books and preserve them. Sapnap and Phil followers are the people who go on supply missions or runs, though for Phil you learn how to address wounds and further study most things. While for Sapnap you further study monsters and their weaknesses, along side where they most commonly spawn. George followers tend to study architecture and tend to be the architectures of Mizu, designing new sections of the city and planning out where stuff goes, their also the people who handle stuff like ventilation and supply of water and checking damages on almost anything. Eret followers study history like many other idol followers, but unlike the others they focus solely on history and laws, they tend to be the leaders of Mizu and the ones who organize basically everything. Bad followers study and learn psychology and reward and consequences situations, while Eret followers make the decisions, Bad followers are also great helps and a very important part of what's basically The Council, as they study and guage how actions will affect the city and provide their input. Wilbur followers of course learn entertainment, like they learn how to play instruments, how to write and play in plays, some even make games! Tommy and Tubbo aren't actually common idols, their referred to as "Mix" idols most of the time, as the people who pick them typically have a wide range of skills and interests that just don't fit in any other idols. So Tommy and Tubbo followers really just go through a college type thing, where they learn a wider range of things than any other idol follower, those followers tend to pick up basically whatever job they want. Tubbo differs slightly though as Tubbo followers can focus a little bit more in a certain field than Tommy followers, which can allow Tubbo followers to often be picked or asked for help for things like building, or recording history, though they CANT be used to help Technoblade or Sam followers, and can't be chosen to go on supply runs or missions. Than Ranboo followers are similar to Karl's, in which they are the librarians and study writings, but they are also the main recorders of history and are tasked with writing down what happens every single day. 

These are the things some idols share, Technoblade, Phil, Sapnap, Sam, and Eret followers all study weapon and armour formations and how to make them. All idol followers learn at least some history of what their learning and their own idols. Bad and Phil followers tend to be the doctors in Mizu. And every idol has one representative in The Council.

2: Its how he shows that theres no hard feelings against the other person, and that he has already completely forgiven the other person. He continues to gently prank the other person until the person either also says that they forgave Grievous or that they show their comfortable around him again. Jackie and Cletus found the situation incredibly funny and laughed hard when it first happened. Watson just kinda watched it all play out with his amused father face but also was ready to step in if it seemed like Grievous went to far. 

3: Benjamin has a lot of life experience in stressful situations, which allows him to relay on pass experiences in a great multitude of situations. And he's just a very calm person. So he's able to just handle the situations better than anyone else. 

8: It was Jackie's birthday when Levi gave him alcohol, Jackie was tired and Levi gave him it, telling him it would keep him awake and make it easier to talk with everyone. Jackie did drink it and got a bit tispy before Watson figured out what happened and stole it away from Jackie, then going and hitting Levi. 

Almost everything from the SMP was lost due to time and weather, the buildings still remain, although crumbling and ruined and many things are missing from them, but a few things (like weapons, books (although heavily weather worn), discs) did survive and are somewhere in the world. The town in the Greater SMP does have 2 weapons, Orphan Obliterator, and Dreams Nightmare sword, and have the original copy of Ranboos memory book. People knew it was there at first, many visited and a few attempted to even preserve everything, but over time, other stuff happened. New kingdoms popped up, with quite a few claiming that the history of the SMP was just made up, a cleverly devised story and since at this time its been a decade or two since the SMP fell, and people just aren't as into it or studied the history as much, they believed them. So people stopped visiting, and everything fell into ruin. Only the town in the SMP grounds still believe and study the SMP, but their often called the idiots of the world for what they do. 

Jackie gets hurt after he jumps about and accidentally steps on a magma block, Charles gets distracted by worrying over Grievous after he got shot that he isn't paying attention and almost falls into a lava pool before Ran saves him, and Cletus gets to cocky and gets hit by a wither skeleton before Watson has to come in and save him. By the end everyone is whining and saying how they regret it as Ran tells them off for not following what he said and how he said they weren't ready. They find a bastion and fortress! They find the fortress first and Watson, Cletus, and Grievous go in to grab blaze rods after Watson basically freaks out about blaze rods and won't shut up about getting some for potions. And after Cletus gets hit by the skeleton they rush to a nearby bastion they saw to barter with the Piglins for the cure. But after they get it they stay behind and continue to trade as Watson teaches them about Piglins. 

10: I'm thinking of adding maybe mind control or hallucinations to the battle. With Ranbob being so close to Dream again, and even though he'd tried so hard to break Dreams control in him, Dream is still able to control Ranbob to some degree. Causing him to have hallucinations during battle of him killing his family again and Ran trying to kill him. While for Ran, Dream manipulates him, trying to get him to believe that this all is still Ranbobs fault, and how Ranbob doesnt care about him or anyone, and only cares for himself. Basically he's trying his last ditch attempt to separate the two so he can get his puppet back, and get rid of a annoying nat (in his opinion) in the process. 

13: A lot of people know of him being the General actually. But it only matters to people who actually fight in the Pit, as again its merely a fighting title. Not many people have been able to beat him, only 2 have actually been able to bet him and win whatever the prize was when they competed, but those people also choose to not take the general title. But they've said it was very hard to beat Jackie with his speed and him being able to do whatever he wants basically. Jackie, Ran, and Watson are all at some part on par, they share similar fighting moves and tatics which are obviously shared in battle. But other than a few shared tatics, their not considered on par at all. They do! The Corporal fights first, Sergeants go next, then the General. 

14: A few times Ranbob tried to break off from the group and head back to Mizu, but every time someone caught him, weither it be Charles or Cletus or even Jackie, and were able to bring him back home. Talking to him and talking him through the whisper episode, keeping him calm and in charge of his mind.

Nice to have you back, Brothers Anon! I tested the link, and it worked fine, so I think it might’ve been one time, but I went ahead and re-linked it, so I hope it works for you now.

1: Honestly sounds cool. I call studying Karl! With all the different builders, Mizu sounds like a beautiful place. What would you say some of it looks like? Any special areas? And also, the Council? What’s that? I assume they’re the leaders, but is that all they do? Do they make decisions over everything, or are they divided for certain areas, like farming and education? Does every idol have a representative, or are their multiple under one for the Council?

2: Aww. That’s actually kind of sweet. Grievous gently pranks people to show affection. I like that, anon, I really do.

3: What kind of situations?

8: Levi! You should be ashamed of yourself! Bad person, bad!

That’s really interesting, actually. Was there a reason people claimed it was just made up, or did it just happen? Also, do any of the gang realize Nightmare is Dream’s sword? Does Dream try to get one of them to bring it back?

And SMP town isn’t believed? Were they never in contact with Mizu?

Honestly, all those injuries were about what I expected. Charles was worrying over Grievous? Just general concern, or have they forged a friendship? How’s Ranbob faring with the whole ‘two of my idiots just about died’ thing? He strikes me as a worrier. 

Do they have fun, at least once it’s all over? What kind of potions do they up and brew? Do they just sit down and experiment with all their supplies for a bit, and see what happens? Does Ran commandeer it all?

10: Oof. That’s gonna hurt. If Dream has that power, why didn’t he use it before, to force to fishermen to give Ranbob back? Did they have some sort of protection against it? Does it only work for certain people? Also, if I may ask, why is Dream so vested in Ranbob? Surely he could get another puppet, eventually? Is there a particular reason, or is it more of a ‘I worked way too hard on this one to give it up now’ kind of thing? Is Ran the nat? If so, what’s his opinion of all the others? 

13: Huh. So Jackie’s pretty strong, then. In what way are they not considered on par? Is one considered stronger than the other? Faster? Is Jackie considered stronger than them aside from shared tactics, or is it the other way around? Also, can there only be one Corporal and two Sergeants, or is it simply because those were the only ones to catch Porkius’ eyes.

14: Oh, so this happened during the road trip? Jackie even got involved? How did the gladiators react to Ranbob trying to bolt for Mizu randomly? How far has Ranbob gotten? Was it ever far enough to seriously concern the fishermen? Does bringing him back ever get physical an evolve into a fight, or does he usually stay pretty docile during it?

[empathic-seer]

About

Name: Sheridan Dwyer

Age: 18(TWEWY), 21(Neo-TWEWY/Post Neo)

Height: 4’9/144 cm

Gender: Female

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Questioning but identifies Bisexual

Occupation: Full-time College Student for Nursing, works part-time performing whatever jobs she can get for acting and voice acting. Keeping her eyes open for an opening at WildKat.

Biography:

I’d mostly prefer for the details to come out organically, but she lives in Shibuya to pursue Nursing school and has a tiny apartment all her own.

Her mother has suffered from chronic pain and other ailments since she was small but they’re super close, her biological father treats her like a child and tries to buy her love with money and video games and her mother’s now ex was severely emotionally and verbally abusive as well all the way until he was finally kicked out when she was 14.

Her mother has kept in some contact though she’s readying to cut him off completely and Sheridan still stiffens at the sound of his voice and can recognize him by his knock.

She’s always seen the UG, but she didn’t learn or see nearly as much as she does in Shibuya due to being from a smaller town in New York. It was mainly just Noise.

She was born at 1 pound 11 ounces and before the third trimester, leading to her nearly dying twice. According to her Mom, she had the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck, so she wasn’t getting any nutrients. After that scare, 3 days later her oxygen levels suddenly went down to single digits, to the point a priest was called in to give last rites. Once the cross was drawn on her forehead her oxygen levels shot up and haven’t come back down since.

Sheridan assumes this is why she can see the UG, though she has no idea why she was saved and it’s something she struggles with often.

Speaking of the Game; boy is she conflicted about it. She probably shouldn’t be, but she helps any Players she can if she catches them in a reaper decal store, warning them of approaching Noise and often putting herself at risk to help them find Partners to give them a fighting chance. She’s also known for interfering more directly by taking infective Noise onto herself. She can’t take seeing others in pain and would rather deal with the ensuing negativity than have another go through it.

So yeah. Oops. As far as her conflict with the Game itself, she loves the fact people get a second chance, and even understands entry fees and their purpose to help others grow. But the erasure part...that she struggles with. It takes a big emotional toll on her and she can’t grasp why it’s necessary as she doesn’t understand the inner-workings enough.

Thoughts on the Games:

The World Ends With You:

Speaking of the Game; boy is she conflicted about it. She probably shouldn’t be, but she helps any Players she can if she catches them in a reaper decal store, warning them of approaching Noise. She’s also known for interfering more directly by taking infective Noise onto herself. She can’t take seeing others in pain and would rather deal with the ensuing negativity than have another go through it. All the better if it helps out Players on the way.

So yeah. Oops. As far as her conflict with the Game itself, she loves the fact people get a second chance, and even understands entry fees and their purpose to help others grow. But the erasure part...that she struggles with. It takes a big emotional toll on her and she can’t grasp why it’s necessary as she doesn’t understand the inner-workings enough.

She recognizes she has a lot to learn, especially being only a bystander who mainly watches from the sidelines.

At the end of the Game, nimbly avoids wearing an O pin after seeing the effects from the Game, she hides out in high Imagination areas like Udagawa, the River and WildKat to feel safer. The conformity scares her, she’s always felt different but being alone in a sea of people with the same goal...she never wants to feel so isolated again.

Neo:

As far as Shiba’s Game...she does not like the change.

The UG she’d come to expect was turned completely on its head and it’s even worse.

She understood most of Joshua’s Game. The checks and balances set in place, Reapers and Players, entry fees...all of it save the erasure.

But now the erasures have increased with one team winning nonstop and all she can do is watch in horror as it happens. So many people...Erased without a thought week after week. It’s emotional torture for her as an Empath honestly. The horror, the fear, and then just...nothing.

The shifting energy is much darker than the conformity at the end of the original and she can tell something dangerous is happening, though she can’t grasp what.

Worries over the Wicked Twisters and keeps tabs on their emotions throughout the Game since they’re so much smaller than the other groups.

To say she was shocked when both Neku and Beat were in again was an understatement. She thought they’d escaped. There’s so much she doesn’t know but she watches even more intently when she can from then on.

Feels Shoka’s struggle and wants to help the girl escape the toxic influences surrounding her and get in a better environment.

Just wants everyone to be safe and healthy and for the suffocating air to be breathable again.

Tidbits:

Has always felt drawn to Shibuya River, and WildKat Cafe. There’s a...quiet. A calmness she never gets anywhere else. Particularly in the river. It’s just herself and her own emotions for once but even they feel muted there. Darker thoughts even if present is quieter, and become white noise in the wake of the sound of the river flowing.

Tends to loiter quietly and shyly steal glances at Hanekoma and Joshua if either is in the cafe but too intimidated to actually approach. Something feels...otherworldly about them. Her intuition can tell something is powerful about them so she’s always kept her distance despite feeling a pull towards both.

That goes the same for Hazuki as well, of course.

All Higher Plane beings in her experience mute her Empathy, though she isn't sure why. It's part of why she's so on edge around them, both wanting to be near and torn on approaching.

The library is another place you’ll find her, sequestering in a lone corner far from others and likely reading some supernatural romance aloud or working on a story.

Chronic fatigue is a bad side effect that’s pretty noticeable if she’s been giving too much of herself to others and letting herself be drained. In high school, she’d come home and have to nap for an hour or 3 depending on the day just to recover from the constant negativity she took on from all her “friends”. She still finds herself in that state pretty often, though not as bad nowadays as she’s trying to learn healthy boundaries.

Personality:

Sheridan is very openhearted and kind. Often way too trusting and forgiving for her own good despite having very good intuition. She’s very quick to inquire how others are but brushes off when asked about herself and quickly redirects. She’s very comfortable when it comes to taking care of others since she had a sick mom to take care of all throughout childhood. It’s instinct for her to see if anyone needs anything and she’s ended up flustered many a time by accidentally asking “are you ok?” or “do you need anything?” since if she drifts off or gets bored it’ll pop out sometimes after living with her mom for so long.

She’s also an Empath, meaning she feels what others do and experiences their emotions as her own. She tends to have her guard up a little, she doesn't want to accidentally get too much of someone unless they're ready to give it, but she also doesn't want to leave someone in crisis. She...has a bad habit of attracting people who use her as an emotion dumping ground and letting them stay way too long.

Sheridan feels like her whole purpose is to help others. Like it's all she's good for. She's really struggling to learn that selfish isn't a dirty word and that she's allowed to want things too and to get upset and that what she says is worth listening to.

Easy to think about, but hard to put into practice. She's learned when people ignore her or especially talk over her to quiet down. 'Clearly they just really need to talk right? I didn't have anything important to add anyway." Or so her thought process typically goes.

She tends to be shy at first but if given positive reinforcement and encouragement she’ll slowly warm up. She does best in intimate, small groups.

Seems like she doesn’t have a sense of humor but is actually pretty funny now and then. She just has to feel comfortable enough to crack jokes in the first place.

People tend to look at her in shock if she curses since when she’s first meeting people and in the warming up phase, she seems very polite, kind, and innocent to a fault.

Easily flustered, especially by teasing. Any person she’s even a little bit attracted to she’ll likely be at least a little pink, fidgety and sheepish. It doesn’t take much either. Corner her, pin her, or even just direct eye contact could be enough to make her go red. She’s hopeless in that regard since she’s very inexperienced.

Severely touch starved but way too scared of rejection to initiate or confess as much so she just kinda suffers in silence.

An easy crier. Cries at the drop of a hat. Even when angry, she cries because no matter what she’s hurting to be angry at all given it’s typically very rare for her to begin with. Feeling what everyone around her does has led to her being a every emotional person in her own right.

Hobbies:

Enjoys acting and performing more than anything, even though she’s yet to be cast as a lead or anything major except in her theatre final, where she got to play Doris from Fame. One of her favorite roles. She loved participating in high school at her musical theatre program and did stage crew all the way up to 11th grade when she finally made it in and got to be in first the ensemble and then lead ensemble the following year. She often gets typecast as the “cute one” or child roles thanks to being 4’9 and being very accommodating and kind.

Somewhat hand in hand with acting and performing, but singing. Gets stage fright occasionally but is able to push through it.

Reading body language is something else she finds very fun, but she never voices it without explicit consent. She likes to people-watch in Shibuya and guess their lives inwardly to keep herself fresh.

Plays video games very often, especially RPGs as well as reading to escape her troubles. It’s a great way to combat loneliness and also not think for a while, to lose herself in another world.

Writes as well, to vent her negative thoughts. Typically through a fanfiction blog for x reader fandom and kpop content in 2nd person. A bit shy about voicing it though. Has original ideas and has started a book but trying to build her own world and the magic system has proven a bit difficult.

Reading supernatural romance novels. Her favorite genre since the worlds and characters are typically very immersive and serve as great escape potential. Loves to find a corner, make sure she's completely alone, and voice act the characters as she reads. Y'know, like a nerd.

Likes to bake, especially different types of cookies. It’s a great stress reliever. She has several video game recipes she wants to try to learn though. Particularly the butterscotch cinnamon pie from Undertale and sea-salt ice cream from Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days.

Binging guilty pleasure shows. Loves laughing at trashy reverse harems with friends like Diabolik Lovers to both appreciate the hotness of the designs and voice acting and also how awful the characters are as people. Doesn’t mind thirsting over toxic vampires, but obviously only in fiction.

Anxiety:

Mental Health: Not great, though most likely wouldn't guess so. She'd much rather help others, see what they need than have them focus on her. She's very much not used to that and doesn't know how to react.

(Important Note! Please do NOT feel pressured to include anything below in our rp and if you ever need a specific thing added as a trigger tag do let me know! My Trigger tag format is Trigger; ______ if you need to block any! I'm open to it of course, given I included them in my form I just want to make sure everyone I roleplay with has the tools to tailor the experience to them and feel secure.

If I want to start a thread or anything about the issues below I will likely message the Mun in advance first for permission first unless they've stated they're explicitly fine with such content and apologies in advance if I'm awkward when reaching out.)

She tends to have panic attacks thanks to severe arachnophobia and it can take her a solid hour to work up the courage to try and kill one, typically while she's crying and whimpering to herself to "breathe Sheridan, that's it breathe…"

She tends to get bouts of social anxiety. When she's acting it's fine because she's not her, and the same for if she's in an intimate group.

But especially if someone starts yelling at her? She'll likely freeze and then look to run away before the person sees her crying. She can't stop shaking and can barely breathe. It's awful and a huge trigger for her. Even if it's not directed at her she'll still panic.

Also suffers from driver’s anxiety. Still only has her permit since she hasn’t found anyone who can put her at ease enough and that she wouldn’t be embarrassed to break down with.

Asperger's Syndrome/Autism Spectrum Disorder:

High functioning but a big person to hyper-fixate and jump from one fixation to another especially when in a bad headspace. Can become obsessed and may need to be gently pulled back/ forced outside.

Stims, mainly physically. Squirms before sleep mainly because her brain won't shut off.

Soft/smooth stims are her favorite anxiety soothers.

Has a rainbow bear with purple eyes she's had since childhood that is a stim she uses to calm from panic.

Clutches her necklace; an Undertale plaque that reads in white text '*a determined soul' and has the rainbow SOUL hearts above it. Uses it as a source of strength.

Bounces her leg when she can but has mainly learned to force herself to stop.

Only does this one when not around her mom since both share the same stim and her Mom said it made her nauseous.

Depression:

Frequent intrusive negative thought spirals and suicidal ideation. Thoughts of self-harm, in a similar vein, though she’d never act on it.

Unfortunately, knowing they’re irrational doesn’t stop the thoughts from happening way too often for her liking.

Her becoming overwhelmed by her emotions and breaking down for 3 hours is commonplace, as is her ghosting for way too long. A bad habit because she doesn't want to burden anyone when she’s not even able to be there for them.

Basically, if she isn’t serving others she feels she shouldn’t exist at all but she’s trying to understand she has worth all on her own.

Eating Issues:

Body dysmorphia with her weight. She tends to not eat often and even if urged she hates that she has to force herself and typically puts herself down which can lead to a spiral if she’s not careful.

Sometimes she's fine. But even when "fine" she'll typically have something small like a muffin, and a 1/4 of dinner and that's all she'll eat.

She snacks because she doesn't have to think when she eats it if she's distracted. Things like popcorn, pocky, or pretzels are her go-to's.

Kind of wants someone to be able to care enough to notice inwardly and maybe text her to see when and what she's last eaten but doesn't ever want to emotionally dump like others do to her because she doesn't want to be a burden or pitied.

CPTSD:

She had her first emotion flashback recently having to do with her abuser and has been shaken ever since, trying to deal with it on her own. Yelling is a trigger for her, especially when paired with degradation.

Forced "civility" as well.

There was a period while her mother was unaware of the extent of the abuse given Sheridan was still trying to protect her. Over the course of 3 years nothing but good night and good morning, passive-aggressive and snide comments of "aren't you going to say hi/bye/thank you/your welcome?" anytime she was too crippled by anxiety/fear to look at him, let alone speak was the norm.

Relationships:

None yet! Just let me know if anyone wants to be added and I’ll happily do so! <3

[girlbossx]

You know what, I'll bite.

1. I'm a straight 'TERF'. I exist because... I'm heterosexual and am radical-leaning in my feminism. Not sure what you're asking here.

2. Not a lesbian, but 'afraid of men vibes' is... really not it. Lesbians are females attracted to females. Many women (and therefore lesbians) have traumatic experiences w/men. Acting like it's a woman's fault if they're afraid of men is gross and victim-blamey.

3. No, and the fact that a movement that's very pro-female is seen as a superiority movement is evidence that the movement is needed. Being proud to be female and being female-positive is not narcissism. See: thousands of years of oppression for being the 'inferior' sex

4. We don't hate trans women. We believe that changing the definition of the word 'woman' to 'anyone who identifies as a woman' as opposed to 'adult human female' will harm women and erode women-only spaces that have been fought for. We believe that biological sex is different from gender and should not be seen as fake or irrelevant, because one sex has historically dominated and oppressed the other. See #3.

5. If by 'obsession with genitals' you mean 'lesbians like vagina and not penis', then we're obsessed because lesbians are being pressured into the alternative or else be transphobic, which is rape rhetoric. Or do you mean 'not being ashamed of having female organs'?

6. Many radfems are more educated about psychology than you seem to believe. See: brain sex

7. Yes, gender is completely fake and a societal construct. That's gender critical, aka (what many call) 'TERF', rhetoric. Are you secretly a TERF?

8. Bitch is a slur used against women that fosters sexism. It is not feminist. It is misogynistic and insulting. To say otherwise is denying the reality of the word.

9. I'm very sorry people have called you ableist slurs. That's not okay in any context, said by anyone. That being said, radical feminism is a specific ideology with specific beliefs and just because someone says they're one doesn't mean they're one. However, I can't comment on those who called you slurs, because I don't know them.

10. I haven't seen your blog, but if you tag posts with 'terf' or 'radfem' or something along those lines, it will show up if someone follows the tag.

11. See #3. How does it have 'white superiority vibes' when one is an oppressed group advocating for liberation and equality and one an oppressor group advocating for continued oppression and inequality?

12. We're not.

13. Because saying that is racist. The argument 'WOC look like men so their oppression is the same as transphobia' is incredibly racist and insulting. Females have been oppressed because they're females. Bringing WOC into your argument to justify including males in female spaces is horrible and, again, racist.

14. We don't 'identify' as women. We're adult human females, so, by definition, we are women. Saying that radfems identify as women shows a basic lack of knowledge about radical feminist theory.

15. I'm straight, so I can't personally comment on it. However, factually speaking, it's a slur.

16. Not a lesbian, can't comment, but not having sex with men isn't gatekeeping and lesbian issues are LGBT issues.

17. We don't? Not sure where that's coming from

18. In general? I... don't care if someone cares about my opinions. Doesn't affect me. I don't have opinions for other people's benefit.

19. Pride in having a vagina? You mean like, spray-painting vaginas everywhere, using our vagina as synonymous with being strong and brave, bragging about the size of our vagina and using that as a measure of our worth, and having pervasive vaginal symbols in art and culture? Oh wait... that's men with their penises. Why is one culturally acceptable but one disgusting and bad? Maybe because vaginas have been seen as disgusting for all of history?

20. We are helping women by virtue of fighting to protect female-only spaces, like bathrooms, locker rooms, and sports. That protects women. Radical feminists also advocate for women to be financially and socially independent, which is helping women.

21. So people that share our interests can find our posts. You know, the purpose of tags.

22. We don't hate sex workers, and sex work isn't feminist. It's an exploitative industry that encourages trafficking and harms women far more than it helps them. Women are trapped, coerced, and forced into sex work on a wide scale. We are against anything that harms women to that extent.

23. Yes, we know what a dominatrix is. However, kink as a whole encourages and normalizes violence against women by putting it in a sexual context. Why is it not okay for a man to like to choke, hit, or harm a woman in average situations, but totally fine in a sexual one?

24. ...are we? Considering stereotypes against females are generally insulting, I haven't seen one radical feminist that likes them. What specifically are you talking about?

25. I can't read your mind, so I have no clue what you mean by that.

It really doesn't seem like your questions are in good faith, but in case they are, I answered them to the best of my abilities while trying to not make this post too long.

Don't mind me. Just here to disrespect TERFs.

Questions for TERFs.

Straight TERFs. Why? Just... why? Why are you straight? Why do you exist?

Lesbian TERFs. Kinda give me afraid of men vibes.

Do you really think women are superior, or are you just a narcissist? Should ask your therapist about that?

Why are you so obsessed with trans women if you hate them so much? Seems kinda sus to me?

What's your obsession genitals? That's really weird.

Why don't you go to therapy? For real, the amount of times you ignore my responses about the psychology of gender, makes me think you just literally don't believe in psychology.

Why do you care so much about gender? Gender is literally a social construct. You do realize that right? Gender is fake. It means nothing.

Why do you hate the word "bitch"? Like, the most feminist thing is being a bitch. A bitch is just a strong woman that intimidates men.

Why do you say "Okay, well I don't associate with the TERFs that use that language" when I give you the laundry list of abelist slurs TERFs have called me? It gives me "Not all men" energy.

If you hate trans people do much, why do you keep invading my trans posts?

Why do you think women are superior? Gives me white superiority vibes.

Why are you all such dicks, just like in general?

Why is it when I mention that transphobic rhetoric is rooted in racism, you get defensive?

Why do you say you don't believe in gender but you identify as a woman? That's literally a gender? Like, what?

Why do you hate the word queer so much?

Lesbian TERFs. Why do you spend so much time gatekeeping the LGBT community and no fucking time talking about LGBT issues?

Why do you hate asexual people? Just like, in general? Does me desire to not fuck bother you that much?

Why do you think trans people care about your opinions? Just like, in general.

Why do you have so much pride in having a vagina? Really makes me think that you had no accomplishments in your life to be proud of.

Why do you spend so much time spreading transphobic rhetoric and no time actually helping women. Jesus, men have given me more support as a "woman" in STEM than you have?

Why do you use "terfs please touch" in your tags? That's gross

Why do you hate sex workers? Like, that's the most feminist thing a woman can do. They're literally reclaiming they're bodies?

Why do you hate kink? You do know what a domanatrix is, right?

Why are you so proud of female stereotypes? That shit is degrading as fuck.

Most important rhetoric. Why do you remind me of cis-straight men? Actually, ex that. I'd rather be around a cis-straight man over you.

-fae

[anotherriceball0326]

Stay updated on my fanfiction chapter releases here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26355238/chapters/64235383#workskin

Chapter 2: "Let's Watch a Movie!"

“Don't look so happy to see us, carrots.” Arisa teases.

“Where are you two off too this lovely evening?” Saki questioned.

Both girls knew for months that Kyou had it bad for Tohru. He was such a stubborn and ornery guy, but they couldn't help but notice how he melted whenever Tohru was around. In fact, they often took advantage of the fact that he could never say no to her. It was quite amusing.

“Kyou was just going to take me up to the roof for a nice chat.” Tohru said innocently.

“A chat, huh?” Arisa sounded annoyed “What's this all about you little punk?! You better not be trying to corrupt our sweet Tohru?!”

“How indecent.” Saki gasped.

“IT’S NOTHING LIKE THAT!” Kyou shouted “WHY THE HELL DID YOU TWO FREAKS COME HERE ANYWAY?!”

The girls chuckled. They knew how easy it was to get under his skin. They did it playfully of course. Deep down they liked Kyou, but they genuinely were worried for Tohru. As genuine as Kyou’s feelings appeared, they couldn't help but worry that he may break her heart And that is something that they couldn’t bear. That is something that would break her…. Despite being her usual cheery self, they knew that Tohru’s heart was fragile. They also knew that Tohru was carrying a heavy burden lately and they didn't know exactly why.

Tohru was much harder for them to read. They always assumed they knew everything about their good friend, but the fact that she hid living in a tent from them really slipped them up. They saw the way she looked at him and how she blushed whenever they teased her. They noticed how Kyou and Tohru acted as they walked home together, like they were already a couple.

That was the main goal of the night. To figure out what’s going on between these two. Arisa and Saki made a pact. They would do what they could to push these two and expose how they really felt about each other. Besides…Kyou was a good guy. Sure, he had his faults. He had a mouth on him and his manners were severely lacking in more ways than one….but…

They knew that he made Tohru happy, happier than they had ever seen her before. Definitely the happiest since her mother's accident.

And that's all that mattered right? That Tohru was happy. That's all they could ever ask for from someone like Kyou.

“Uo-chan, Hana-chan, it's sweet of you both to worry, but Kyou would never do anything indecent. He’s a perfect gentlemen" Tohru said as she grabbed Kyou’s arm.

The girls noticed Kyou immediately blush and look away, but he didn't back away from Tohru nor did he even attempt to release her arm.

He really is changing isn't he? Tohru does have that effect on people. She always has. I mean only sweet Tohru would see the good in a person, even someone as angry as Kyou.

But his anger is different somehow. He seems lighter, softer. It was as though Tohru was slowly peeling away his hard exterior and expressing his true nature to the world.

Both girls looked at each other and smiled. They knew that they were both thinking the same thing.

“Alright, well sorry to interrupt your night, but I guess you'll both have to settle with hanging out with all of us.” Arisa joked.

“Oh no! I'm so glad you all are here! This'll be a great night, right Kyou?” Tohru glanced at Kyou with pleading eyes.

“Yeah, whatever…”Kyou grumbled.

The girls and guys all started flooding into the house.

As they pushed past Kyou and Tohru, Kyou felt her grabbing onto his arm even tighter than she had before. “Thank you, Kyou.” Tohru whispered as she pulled him in close so he could hear her better. “I know you had other plans, but I promise to make this up to you.”

Promise to make this up to me? What does that mean? Kyo thought.

His heart began to race as he dissected those words carefully.

Okay…this is the opportunity to truly impress her. The chance for him to show how much he loved her and how great of a boyfriend he could be.

Boyfriend…

That word hit him harder than any word ever had before.

What did he know about being a boyfriend? How does a good boyfriend act?

Kyou’s nerves were starting to get the best of him.

He so badly wanted to respond to Tohru, but he was quickly interrupted by Momiji’s obnoxious whining.

“Tohru….let's watch a movie! Haru brought a good one! It's about a little girl whose family gets devoured by zombies and….”

“ZOMBIES?!?!” Tohru’s demeanor immediately changed. Her face lost all color and her knees began to quake.

“Yeah, it's a real tearjerker.” Haru said sarcastically.

Kyou had a flashback to when they went to the haunted house.

Stupid Momiji and Haru…. Had they not learned anything from the last experience they had with Tohru? They clearly don't know her at all!

Kyou placed his hand on the small of Tohru’s back. He lowered his voice in an attempt to avoid an audience.

“Tohru..” Kyo whispered.

Tohru’s body relaxed to his touch. His voice soothed and distracted her from her current fear. She looked into his soft Amber eyes and caught herself feeling lost in their glow.

“Yes!?” She asked nervously as she became aware of the audience that was surrounding her.

Despite Kyou being discreet, the other teenagers couldn't help but watch the show. It was like watching a live action romance novel unfolding in front of their very eyes.

“We really don't have to watch. We can always do something else.” Kyou comforted her.

Tohru thought for a second. She didn't want to disappoint anyone, especially Momiji. He looked so excited about the movie. And after all, she promised herself that would be more bold since she knew that one day she would be out on her own…. alone.

Completely alone.

A sudden image flashed into Tohru’s mind. It was the image of Kyou…locked up…. In a place that was foreign to her and she knew she'd never be allowed to visit.

Tears began to well up in her eyes.

“Tohru??” Kyou looked at her with worry.

Tohru snapped out of her despair and balled both of her fists in front of her.

“I can do this!” Tohru shouted eagerly

Kyou snickered. “Okay…okay, no need for the dramatics." Kyou said as he playfully bumped her head with his fist.

THAT’S NOT SOMETHING BOYFRIEND’S DO. IDIOT!

Kyou scolded himself.

“On one condition.” Tohru added. “Kyou-kun needs to sit next to me.”

Kyou was surprised by her demand. That was just it. She didn't ask, she demanded. Kyou was impressed. He always admired her humble nature, but felt she deserved to be more honest about what she wanted. She deserved to be selfish.

“Of course, dummy. “ Kyou blushed. “I need to make sure you don't pass out from fear.”

The group made their way into the dining room. They moved the furniture around to create a big open space and placed pillows and blankets everywhere they could.

Tohru found a spot in the back of the room. She figured it would be the best spot. It would make it harder to see the television and more difficult for everyone to see her silly reactions.

“Who wants popcorn?!” Momiji shouted!

Momiji passed out small bowls to each of the groups.

Yuki was sitting with Haru, Kagura and Momiji. Arisa and Saki were sitting side by side. Then of course there was Tohru and Kyou.

Kyou could feel Kagura staring at him and Tohru. Tohru didn't notice of course, but Kyou felt the rage that exuded from her. If looks could kill, Kyou would have been a dead man the second she set eyes on him that night.

Kyou knew it was going to be awkward between him and Kagura now. After their "date", Kyou expected Kagura to treat Tohru differently. He never directly said it to Kagura, but he could tell that Kagura knew his feelings for Tohru and that she was the reason why Kyou would never love her. He hoped that Kagurs would be mature about the situation, but her aura was concerning.

Oh well... he thought. Tonight is about me and Tohru.

Haru inserted the DVD and moved to his spot like a stealthy ninja. Arisa and Saki threw pillows at him after he pretending to trip and fall on top of them. Yuki shook his head at Haru’s immaturity, but found himself unable to hold back his laughter.

“SHHHHHH IT’S STARTING!” Momiji screamed. “Oh my gosh! A zombie!

“SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” The whole group shouted in unison.

Tohru chuckled. Kyou looked at her as she enjoyed the group’s shenanigans. He smiled warmly .

I'll never get tired of that laugh. He thought.

To be continued...

[undiscoveredwriting]

Fragile Things, but OK.

Jakarta - September 15th, 2019.

It has been three days since I attended The Maine’s show Live in Singapore, and I am still emotional over the things I experienced. No, this will not be just another review about The Maine’s show in Singapore, nor this will be a story about my trip to Singapore, this is me wearing my heart on the sleeve.

You see, before we move on to the part where it got real, I want to underline the point that this entire blog post might be triggering. May you be a The Maine fan, or you’re just someone who feels insecure about a lot of things and you feel like the world is ending because you can’t do one favor a friend asked you to, or you just can’t seem to break a routine or a certain state of mind whenever you’re in a certain situation. Those are the things I will be telling in this post and this is me opening up to things I didn’t even know I have to admit before.

The past few weeks leading up to the show day was honestly one of the hardest things I had to go through. Juggling my day job and my side projects that includes handling some shows and gigs, I lost a lot of sleep and lack the motivation to keep on going because I was just emotionally drained and physically exhausted - I thought about dropping all my projects and just focus on my day job. I was not in a very good state of mind, I wanted to quit everything I knew because it didn’t feel fun, it felt like it’s weighing me down. I didn’t tell anyone, I still haven’t. All I thought was everything had to be done perfectly so I could go on my 3 days' leave for Singapore in peace. News flash, I managed to pull through, no quitting whatsoever and having that getaway to Singapore was such a reward.

Fast forward to the day I flew to Singapore on the 11th of September, with all the touristy-problem I faced the moment I landed, I managed to get to the place we were staying in safely, tummy full with good food, ready for my skin-care routine and visited the dreamland right after. Singapore time showed 2-ish am when I closed my eyes. 

The next thing I remember was getting woken up at 7-ish am on September 12th. With eyes heavy, hair messy, I let my excitement fueled me to get ready. Just like most shows I went to, I was not alone. Here is my companionship.

I’ve known them all before the show and I’ve known most of them for a very long time. Other than the girl in the middle, whose name is Priscila and had only met at the show, everyone knew one another. I knew how much these girls love the band, I knew the sacrifices they’ve made before for this band, I knew, that The Maine had played an important role in their life - as they did mine. When we took this picture, we just wanted to have a picture of ourselves waiting in line, still looking so cute with all our make up intact despite all the humidity that filled Singapore’s air. Little did we know, Pris would be picked to get on stage and sing Taxi with the band later that night. Was I glad it was her? You’re damn right I was.

Several cold mineral water bottles and cold cans of POKA Green Tea, the gate was opened and we were ready to sing our hearts out. The lights were out, Adam Simons from the Wanderer took the stage, warming up the crowd before he hit the very same stage as The Maine’s additional guitarist / keyboardist.

Before the show starts, I kept thinking “which song would most likely made me tear up?”. My heart was just beating in its regular tempo. I was excited, but most of my friends were standing against the barricade while I stood against their backs. It felt okay, the stage was very near to where I stood, I would still be able to see them up close, and I did.

First song in, I sang out loud. I knew the lyrics to Slip The Noose, I could feel the energy from the entire room, it felt magical. But it wasn’t enough to keep me off the ground. Something was still missing. I wasn’t entirely okay. I was happy, but it didn’t feel the way it used to. When the band started playing the intro to Am I Pretty, I couldn’t help but look at John’s face and wonder... If a man that looks as good and as gorgeous as him still question his look, where would that leave me? I never really cared about what others are saying about how I look but at that moment, I didn’t feel pretty. My plus size clothing felt like they weigh another kg, but it wasn’t until they started singing Broken Parts I truly broke down.

I cried several times during the show while singing to Am I Pretty, (un)lost, How Do You Feel but listening to the first line of Broken Parts that goes like this “ well it isn't getting easier“...

My mind immediately raced back to the hardest weeks of my life that just ended exactly one week before September 12th, 2019. My mind raced back to when Crowd Surfers was hitting rock bottom and was getting so many shits. So I cried, not caring about the mascara and my perfect winged-eyeliner. My journey with Crowd Surfers was a wild ride and the moment John sang “But we're not beyond repair” that I realized, I was the broken part of this team, no, my team is not broken, but I am. I cried even harder.

I’ve cried during a song at another show before, but I’ve never cried as hard as I did during this song. In other shows, I would cry at some songs that felt personal, but I wouldn’t cover my face with both of my hands. That very night, I covered my face until halfway of the song. I didn’t open my eyes and/or see the band perform this song live before me, I just cried until I felt hands pulling me close, and I did one thing I don’t usually do, I embrace the hugs and let them see me crying. I let my walls down, all those defense mechanisms I had, I let them all go. For several minutes, I let the people around me handle me with care. For that moment, I wasn’t the one looking out for people. They looked out for me and it felt really nice. It felt really good. Somehow, as soon as the song ends, the four walls around me are back and I’m back on the looking out for people mode.

Especially when John decided he’d crowd-surf. My immediate response was helping the girls next to me when they fell. Mr. Lead-Singer was right in front of my face because the people holding him weren’t as strong, yet some girls were already falling, so I got no time to interact with him, my focus shifted back to getting the girls up like I always did. Yet that moment made me realize one thing. I’ve grown. I went from the girl who wanted a frontman or any favorite band member for myself to not giving a fuck about them when I saw others in need.

There was also a moment during Black Butterfly and Dejavu where I thought about this person. I’ve known him since 2015, I think. We talked a lot, met a few times, and I still keep something of his which I should probably return soon. The lyrics “ Just another lovesick afternoon, black butterflies and déjà vu. Hoping for the right words. Waiting for the right words.” really got to me and... Well, I’m hoping that 26 letters could explain my feeling toward this person.

It was also during the encore, Another Night On Mars, I realized something. That there’s someone I know, someone I’ve known since 2009, someone I watched The Maine with for the first time back in 2010, was in the same bulding yet I couldn’t see her. She wasn’t a part of my then current-group and Mars felt a little incomplete without her. We stopped talking altogether last year yet it didn’t feel right letting her be alone at that moment. I felt another guilt coming up my gut. 

The moment the show ended and I saw her, I called her and apologized. We hugged. That moment felt like forever. It gave me a sense of peace. I didn’t even remember why I stopped talking to her, but that hug... that hug was what I needed. A sense of familiarity from the past, a reminder that I wasn’t always this uptight.

We then queued for a meet and greet with the band, a group of 5 or 6 people, they said. I went into the meet and greet with the people I cared about, resulting in this sweet little picture of us and The Arizona Boys.

Alright, we didn’t stop here. I was still on a mission to get some of my friends’ belonging signed by the band since we couldn’t ask for selfies or sign during the meet and greet, sadly I didn’t get it. I didn’t get the signature and I was beating myself hard because I managed to get a video and picture of myself with John, but no sign.

I didn’t want to post anything related to The Maine because I felt bad. My friend asked only for one thing and I failed. I did that, the fault was mine. Besides, in the picture I took with John, he looked very good and I didn’t feel pretty. The picture was taken after the show, after those break downs. My hair was greasy, my foundation wore off, no concealer concealed the dark circle under my eyes, my winged eyeliner was no longer visible, my lip color turned a shade brighter than it was initially.

During the meet and greet earlier, I told John I’ve never broken down as hard as I did during Broken Parts. John offered me a hug and whisper into my ear, “I’m glad you’re here tonight. I hope you’re gonna be OK in time. Thanks for the bracelet.”

Yes, I gave him the EMONIGHTJKT By Crowd Surfers bracelet in which we'll donate some of the profits to this organization called Into The Light to help to spread the suicide prevention awareness.

So yeah, having that message coming from John, I dare myself to look at the picture of him and I and the more I look at the picture, the more I felt like I deserved that. It wasn’t until Friday I posted my picture and John up on my Instagram Story, and I will post it again today, on my Instagram Feed. Because I now feel worthy of this picture.