#this is. abt em*raldd*o in spirit bc that bothers me the most as an avid enjoyer

[ranvwoop]

There is discourse and I am unfortunately putting my hat in the ring bc... I feel like the actual point is not necessarily what's being discussed

1) QPRs are defined by the individual and can be, like, whatever. This is True.

2) QPRs, no matter what comprises it, are no less important than other forms of relationships. This is Also True.

3) There was, at least at one time, genuinely a problem with [something with romantic framing] /p /p /p it's not against their boundaries they r buddies it's ok!!!! Early c!beeduo marriage comes to mind. I see this less now, which is cool, but I think it's still relevant to the conversation at least as an example.

If characters were solely fictional, this would be all well and good, even the third point, despite how I think that downplays QPRs. But people have the right to dictate rules for how we play with their self insert OCs! QPR shipping is putting a character into a non-canon relationship with non-canon deep feelings, and imo it's still important to try to apply what we Do know about the ccs boundaries and apply them to QPRs, because I don't think many CCs are educated enough on what a qpr is to even know that this is a thing going on lol.

I will use beeduo as an example though beeduo is not necessarily the focus, because they're one that can go either way and it's good! They have consented to their characters being in A Deep Relationship, because that much is canon. Their relationship being a qpr is great! (Their relationship being romantic is also good.)

It is Not Cool when people do the old, "they have to be in a qpr because it's lesser than a romantic relationship, therefore it's the Safe Option and I can do this without breaking their boundaries". Nnno. People did this a lot in early c!beeduo. This is where the /p Cause Boundaries comes in, not necessarily actual QPRs for the sake of writing QPRs (beeduo qpr community now is very lovely as things became clearer and disingenuous people have moved on :D).

Using that mentality as a sort of framework brings us to other characters, though. If they haven't consented to their characters being in a deep relationship, then putting them in one is Sorta Ehhh, because it's on the same footing as other sort of relationship that is stated to be boundary breaking and disliked by the ccs.

QPRs are legitimate, difficult to define relationships that can consist of a lot of different things, and that feels like it goes hand in hand with "and maybe we shouldn't place this on characters if their writers aren't explicitly comfortable with it".