#this is what i wasted my lunch break on smh i want it back

[deus-ex-mona]

lxl stop secretly worrying about each other challenge g o

(shoddy tl under the cut; y’all know the drill by now~~~)

Aizo: Cheerful, yet a little wild. Good at dance performances due to his athleticism. Being able to sing is very important to him.

Yujiro: A refreshing and well-mannered boy who never loses his cool. Good at singing. Being able to perform on stage is very important to him.

Secretly tell us what your feelings about your partner, which you can’t usually say aloud, are!

Aizo: He’s more ambitious than anyone I know, and he works really hard as proof of it. But that’s exactly why I want him to fix the fact that he can’t be honest, y’know? He should just say so if something’s too hard or if he’s troubled by something on his mind. To me, it looks like he’s reluctant to show others that part of him. We’ve been together for a long time, so I wish he’d depend on me a little more.

Yujiro: Keep this between us, but the fact that he’s too kind worries me… Regardless of whether he’s confided in or not, he’d take it upon himself to get involved, and he’d get engulfed by the surrounding negativity and grow depressed as well… I wish he’d show more of his kindness to himself too.

[theeveningletter]

Thursday, 01/19/2023

Last Night's Dream: I did not record it. And I don't remember. But I did wake up at around 1:30 pm today.

Where I went: res. school for extra life drawing.

What I ate: tuna, mayo, tomato sauce, bread, and crackers for lunch. For dinner, the artificial duck ramen, 2 eggs, ham, bread, cookies, the blackberry-flavoured cooler, and tea.

What I did: I didn't do much. After waking up, I ate my lunch. I met Carrie after her class - she said the prof is much better. I guess that's why he has a 5-star rating on rate my teacher. She went back to her room and I worked for Kumon. I worked from about 4:30-5:30. Then, I planned on going to life drawing. Apparently, Erica didn't show up and her student was waiting. But I needed to go!! It's kind of annoying - they said that I would be coming BACK to the meeting after they let me go!! And I didn't message them back yet. Smh. Annoying. Like why don't they schedule their shit better? And so I went to extra life drawing. I asked Carrie if she wanted to join, but she has her forest project due! For life drawing, the model asked what length poses I wanted. She was called in after someone else cancelled and planned on leaving early. So I asked if we could do more shorter poses - 5 mins max. And she didn't take any breaks! Narita was there to conduct it again! It seemed like the hours flew by pretty fast. I look back at my drawings from last year and I think I'm getting better. Happy about that. I saw Narita cleaning up the stuff and I asked if she'd like help but she said no. So I thanked the model, said bye to Narita and left back for res. When I came back, I had dinner and snacks with Carrie! And then she had to work on her forest. I kind of went back to my room and wasted time a bit. And I continued some reading.

Media: What they don't tell you in film school. Miley Cyrus - Attention album.

Things I worked on: life drawing skills! I also submitted my first co-op application earlier today. It was for an animation studio. I am so not qualified but lets see haha.

Grateful for: the life drawing model!

Closing thoughts: I'm kind of tired. I need to be more organized. I want to read on the train when I go back home later today.

[cheelduh]

How to bet your way into someone’s heart. (Highschool AU)

Pairing: Childe x fem!reader

Warnings: Fake weed. Poor Signora smh. Oh yes, lots of swearing. UNEDITED ASF IM LAZY BYE.

Synopsis: Childe is being an infatuated idiot, Lisa has eyes for vending machine chocolate, and Kaeya is desperately in need of a pencil. With all these distractions, there’s no way in hell you’ll be able focus on the task at hand.

This is crack.

I don’t have time.

You think as you race down the hallway, shoes slapping against the floor as you expertly dodge multiple students in your way.

Bullet. You're as fast as a bullet, because everyone around you is a blur and you don't stop, can't stop, not until you meet your target.

It's funny how one can accomplish many challenges and feats they were unable to, merely due to pressure. Pressure is a twisted ugly thing that can gnaw its way into the pit of your stomach and grow like a parasite. Pressure is a parasite that can either bring the best in you, or the worst, but at the cost of one's peace of mind.

"Move it Signora!" You shouted a warning at the senior blocking your way. There wasn't any time for you slow down at that point, and you'd risk bumping into the breakfast club's stall if you swerved to the side, sending juice flying everywhere.

Signora's eyes widened momentarily, getting the gist albeit her anger, and choosing to back up flatly against the locker.

Her lipstick nearly slips from her fingers as you swerve past, a thick gust of wind in your wake.

It messes with the hair she woke up two hours early for.

Signora plots her revenge. You still don't have time.

You nearly kick the door to your home room down, but you can't risk the perfect image your teachers have of you. So you pat down your t-shirt, take five tempting deep breaths, and tentatively knock the door.

The door opens and you're met with a young man, familiar amber pupils welcoming you.

You try not to huff and puff at the cost of your stamina. Thinking back, there's no way in hell you could have physically been that fast.

"Good morning Y/N," Your homeroom teacher gives you a small smile, moving aside to let you in. "Class is just about to start."

You check your watch, then turn to him with an apologetic tone, trying not to crack under the eyes of your classmates. "I'm so sorry Mr.Zhongli, I slept through my alarm."

Your idiot ass forgot to set one because you studied till four in the morning.

"You're like thirty seconds late, cut the shit." Beidou boos from the back, causing your stance to stiffen.

"I don't wanna hear it Beidou. If anything, you're two periods earlier than usual." Ningguang calls her out for you, but you have a feeling it's more so on behalf of a personal vendetta.

Ignoring the two bickering, Mr.Zhongli gives you the handout. "Take a seat. Do not fret over such minuscule things dear."

Relief washes over you. Your impeccable attendance is not on the line.

Childe tries to flag you down next to him but you send him a pointed glare and sit next to Lisa instead.

"You should give him a chance you know." Lisa doesn't even have to open her eyes to know what's going on.

"Please," You scoff, digging through your bags to collect your notes. "As if I have the time to fool around with a shady kid like him."

Your friend sighs in disapproval, and makes no move to take out her own notes as Mr.Zhongli begins the lecture on the Archon war.

"You should really pay attention." It bothers you that she doesn't, but then again it's not your place to tell her what to do or not to do.

"I don't need to." She yawns, blinking an eye open towards you. "I have you after all."

"I'm tired of saving your ass." You groan and pull a pen out of your pocket to get started on the exercises as Mr.Zhongli talks in the background.

The course outline contained all the topic, and you made sure to teach yourself as much as you could before class to stay ahead.

Immersed in the worksheet, you blinked away your sleep and tried to answer as many questions as you could at the moment. You didn't hear the slight shift next to you, and the change of breathing, or the rate of which time went by.

A familiar scent makes its way into your nostrils.

"Lisa. Why do you smell like mango juul juice." You know the scent from when Signora blew a mango flavoured fog in your face yesterday at lunch when you said you were hungry.

A chuckle erupts and you freeze in place. "That's because I'm not Lisa."

You blink. Once, twice, and then crane your head to the side to meet a pair of teasing cerulean eyes.

Fingers loosening in shock, the pen drops on the desk with a short thud.

You whisk your head towards the front of the classroom, and Mr.Zhongli is nowhere to be seen.

"There's no saving you now." Childe's smirk widens, and he scoots closer to you. "Mr.Zhongli had to get something from the staff room. The staff room is near the cafeteria."

"Which is also near the merch stall." You grumbled, bringing both hands to massage your temples as a headache is beginning it's reign.

"Tsk tsk. Smart girl. I'd like to add that he's forgotten his wallet in his office as well, which is in the south wing."

"Son of a..." You mutter underneath your breath, and opt to scoot further back, but your efforts are futile because your desk is in a corner.

Your next beacon of hope is Lisa, so you scan the room full of chattering students, only to find her pestering her crush, Jean.

Shit...there's nothing getting you out of this one.

"What did it take?" Is your only question, the despair starting to brew. How much did it take for your best friend to betray you?

"A dollar and fifty for vending machine chocolate."

You take a moment to breathe, calming your nerves and burying down the urge to screech. "What will it take?"

"For what?" Childe replies back innocently, and you can't believe how fast he can change masks. You almost give in.

"For you to leave me alone."

"Aww come on girlie," He whines, closing in the distance. "Don't be so cold."

What did your mom tell you that one time? Oh yes. That if you were ever backed against a wall, then just break the damn thing down.

Too bad it's figurative. You're just about ready to sock him in the face if you didn't know he was into that sort of thing.

"I'm serious about you," He says, and it sounds so real, so genuine, nearly makes you sputter. "See? I've even bought school supplies.

He unzips his light backback and spills the contents on the table.

A lone piece of paper flies out, a lighter, and a mechanical pencil with no lead that follows straight after. There's also a pocket knife that you choose to ignore.

You're not the least bit surprised.

"First of all, how the fuck are you passing this class. Second, do you really think I'm into nerds?"

"Well, considering that you are a nerd—"

"You're making things worse."

"My bad, my bad." He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. "But on a serious note. I'll do anything."

You cross your arms. "I'm not just another one of your conquests Childe. It's not like I have the time. There are better things to do."

"You need to relax." He says so simply, with complete disregard as to what you are trying to say.

"I am relaxed." You reply, picking up your pen to continue your work. If he's going to annoy you, then you might as well get shit done while he's at it.

You're not wasting any more time.

"When was the last time you got a full eight hours of sleep?" His voice is soft, too soft, and it's not at all like the Childe you know.

Your pen stops momentarily, but you will yourself to continue writing. The words look fumbled, but you don't care. The best thing to do is get your work done and ignore the idiot next to you.

"C'mon, Zhongli won't be back for another half an hour at least. Let's go." He kicks the bottom of your chair to urge you.

The pen shakes in your hand, and you narrow your eyes at the paper, digging holes into poor question eight. "I'm trying to work here. Let me work." You'll say anything to get him off your back.

"Fine fine fine..." He raises both hands in mock surrender. "I'll stop bothering you."

Your ears perk up at that, and you turn to him so fast he has to hold in his laugh. "Really?"

"Yeah," Childe nods along, bringing your hopes up. "If you win a bet, that is." And they're back to ocean level.

You roll your eyes. There's always a catch. That doesn't mean you're any less interested.

"What's the bet?" You ask curiously, all your focus now on him. Just as he longed for from the very start.

He flicks a thumb towards the door, leaning closer to whisper next to your ear. "We bet when Zhongli comes back."

"Are you kidding me?" You aren't bothered at all at the close proximity, mainly because you're too tired and only care about the freedom that will come with your win.

Childe, however, is a completely different story. His heart is beating a thousand times a second, but his face doesn't show it. Not one bit.

Kaeya leans in from the seat behind you two, interested in what's going on. "Ooooh secrets."

"Shut up Kaeya." Childe and you monotonously drone in sync, still having your little staring contest.

The captain of the skating team smiles, about to ask—

"No. We don't have an extra pencil. Even if we did we wouldn't give it to you." Childe finally breaks his gaze to scare off Kaeya.

Kaeya raises a smug brow, and leans back in his chair like the jerkwad he is. "Then don't let me keep you two love birds."

That's all it takes for him to earn Childe's unwavering respect and loyalty for as long as he lives.

After the two are done creating an elaborate handshake as a mark of their newfound friendship, you decide to just forget about the handout. It's not like you're getting anything done anyways.

"Anyways, back to the bet." Childe says, resting his cheek on his fist as he stares at you dreamily. You try not to break under his gaze.

"If I win, you have to go on a date with me."

"No way in hell—"

"Then I'll bother you for the rest of highschool."

Highschool is eternity. You don't want to live through an eternity of this.

"Fine." You answer, and for the first time he sees genuine fear in your face, it makes him waver slightly. Not enough for him to pity you.

"If I win..." You trail, thinking loud and clear as you ignore the excited chatter of your classmates. "I want you to pay attention to class."

"What?" He exclaims incredulously, blinking in disbelief. "I thought you'd get me to stop talking to you altogether."

"If you're paying attention in class, you don't bother me as much and your grades go up." You grin smartly, and oh archons it livens his entire day up, and it's only nine in the morning.

"You care about my grades?" Childe bites back a smile.

"Not at all." You lie, and quickly look away. Woah the floor tile looking trippy.

He decides it's better to get on with the bet without causing you any more distress. After all, you've given him such cute facial expressions today. He's feeling quite generous.

Pulling out his cracked-as-shit latest model phone, he unlocks it and tinkers with it a bit before turning the screen towards you.

"We'll be using this to time both of our predictions at the same time. Whoever has the closer time to when he finally swings by is the winner." The rules are simply put, no room for error.

You tilt your head in confusion. "Why am I seeing a slime review?"

"SHIT!" Childe fumbles with his phone, aggressively tapping on the screen. He lowers his head and voice as if he's been through fifty consecutive hits in the face. "It's uh, Teucer's account."

"Yeah...okay." Is all you can say.

"Ok what do you bet?" He changes the topic to unfuck the situation.

Putting a finger in your chin, you think for a minute, calculating the average of all the times Mr.Zhongli has left the classroom for a considerable amount of time.

"Fifteen minutes." You're sure of it. It's like clockwork every day.

"Hmm..." Childe crosses his arms, seemingly in deep thought. "Five minutes." He places his bet, and both timers start simultaneously.

Five minutes?! Is he serious?

You laugh inwardly. This challenge is in the bag.

The sense of victory you feel dulls when your ears pick up the echo of footsteps nearing the classroom.. Both your heads snap up to the doors.

There's something scary about Childe once his competitive side comes out. "Looks like I've won." He turns to you, eyes darkening evilly.

"What? There's no way in hell a ginger is right." Your palms are clammed up, eyebrows furrowed in panic. You calculated every single variable, how could this be?

You race to the front, Childe right on your tail as the entire class clamps up. The footsteps get louder, causing even whispers to become total silence.

Then it hits you. The shitty music about getting bitches and bars playing on the other side.

The door is swung open by Childe, and you're face to face with an idiot sophomore with a speaker in his pocket.

Childe’s grin is long gone, and you sigh in relief.

The false alarm encourages the class to return back to their idle chatter.

"Scaramouche?" Childe spits, narrowing his eyes at the unamused boy. "I thought it was Signora's shift today."

By "shift" he means being a complete dickwad and scamming fake weed to students in return for their souls. It only really works on the freshmen.

The only reason the club still runs is because Signora threatened the principal with some sus pictures she snapped of him and his assistant.

"Apparently she had an emergency." Scaramouche explains, lowering the volume on his outdated beats pill. "Something about a hair appointment because she got ran into by a, and I quote "lecherous imbecile.""

You steer clear of the conversation, finding the whiteboard far more fascinating and worth your while.

A loud cough is heard from behind the kid, and you're met with a crestfallen look on your beloved teacher's face.

You go through a whiplash of emotions, becoming completely numb towards your loss.

"They were out of slow cooked bamboo shoot soup." He sighs, handing a stack of papers to Childe, who is wearing the fattest smirk on his face at his victory. "Please hand these out to your classmates Childe, and we will begin shortly."

You check down at the timer despite knowing who’s won. Five minutes and twenty five seconds. Somehow, you don't feel as dejected as you thought you'd feel.

Maybe the date will be fun. Maybe Childe isn't so bad. Maybe...you do have time to indulge in these sort of things. If he’s so hell bent on getting your attention, perhaps it’s possible that you can make some room in your heart for him.

However, all those thoughts fly out the window when Childe hands you the new worksheet.

“I hope you're ready for our date tomorrow. We'll be sparring till sundown, and after you’ll be feeding me with chopsticks." He winks, and it makes your heart flip even though all you want right now is to go to the bathroom and barf your guts out.

Feelings are complicated.

You smile back at him nauseously, tight lipped and all, then you pull out your phone, go on maps, and search for the closest cliffs to jump off of.

After he's done, Childe slouches back in his original seat with a different kind of enthusiasm, and opens up his messages. He texts Zhongli a "thank you <3".

[tuanhood]

35,000 ft

pairing: mark tuan x reader

genre: smut, angst, some fluff?, exes to lovers

warnings: 18+, language, dirty talk, cheating, oral sex (female receiving), unprotected sex, public sex (mile high club ALERT)

word count: 9,800+

summary: two years have passed since you last saw your ex-boyfriend. when you’ve thought about running into him again, it certainly wasn’t at 35,000 ft and it certainly wasn’t like this. 

a/n: wow my longest one shot yet... UMMM it’s a little messy and all over the place but don’t hesitate to let me know what you think or if anyone wants to cry over the photos of Mark at home playing in the pool sMH. also i do not CONDONE cheating fyI 

part 2: 125 ft

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Yes, yes, yes I’ll call you when I land…” You mumbled through the phone, half paying attention and half trying to decide which sandwich would best suit your needs. 

“Okay but seriously… call me. I hate it when you’re over there enough so not getting a call freaks me out even more.” 

You wanted to roll your eyes and gag, but you stopped yourself knowing that it wasn’t what a typical girlfriend would do when on the phone with her boyfriend. You two were supposed to still be in the honeymoon phase, not the “he gives me the ick” phase already. 

Then again, you had never even been in the “he gives me the ick” phase before. Yay for new experiences you guessed. 

“Brian, it’s so fine. It’s one of the safest cities in the world, I’ve been so many times I don’t even need a map to tell me where I’m going.” 

“I hope you still do though… Use a map. I don’t want you to get lost and I know that’s easy to do in those modern, technologically advanced smart cities.”

Being with Brian sometimes felt like there wasn’t even a fourth wave of feminism. 

You weren’t sure why you were sticking around. Part of you felt pressured because you hadn’t had any actual relationships in… well awhile and your mom was constantly asking when you were finally going to get a ring on your finger and give her a grandchild. 

Judging by all the outside influences that were currently controlling your life, it felt like maybe there isn’t a fourth wave of feminism. You were setting everyone back just based on your own sad life. Maybe it was best to just dump Brian and go back to your hook up days, the year and a half before him that was just endless amounts of sex with random guys trying to fix a piece of you that would never be put back together. 

“Y/n? Are you still there?” 

“Yup, still here Brian.” 

Even after being together for almost 6 months you couldn’t bring it in you to call him something besides his name. It was always Brian this, Brian that. Calling him a pet name made you cringe. 

Yeah… Maybe it was definitely time to break up with him. 

“Listen… I should go. I want to get something to eat before they start boarding since it’s a long one and all.” 

But you’ll just do it later. 

“Okay… sounds good. Get a small sandwich or something so you’ll feel full enough before they actually feed you on the plane.” 

Suddenly you didn’t want a sandwich. 

“Got it… Bye.” 

“Love you, bye.” 

You hear a noise letting you know the call has been disconnected and drop your hand, gripping the device at your side. 

That was another thing. Brian had told you only 3 months of dating that he loved you – to which you had responded with “oh wow… that’s- that’s… so nice of you.” Being the nice guy, he was completely fine with you not saying it back, because he felt so sure that one day you would. He understood that you had issues with a past relationship that you weren’t quite ready to let go of yet, therefore your heart wasn’t completely available. He felt with time you would give in and love him too. 

As of now you weren’t too sure… Especially if you did end up breaking up with him. At a later date and time of course. Maybe when you came back? 

Your mind went blank as you looked at the shelves of the poorly made airport food in front of you. The sandwiches that had once looked good and enticing suddenly lost their luster and the last thing you wanted to do was waste money on one. Sighing, you glanced back down at the phone in your hand. The object felt more like a heavy weight and a burden rather than just a phone. It wasn’t due to work or family; it was just all because of Brian. 

You’re startled when your phone comes to life once again under your gaze, buzzing softly. 

Brian. Remember don’t forget to text me when you board! 

It was like he had a sixth sense for whenever you were thinking of him. And to be honest it wasn’t that often. 

A couple of weeks ago you were out to lunch with a few friends from college and when updating those who you hadn’t seen in a while on the goings-on of your life, you had at first redacted the fact that you had a boyfriend completely. 

“Anyone romantic in your life?” Your friend Alice had asked you. 

Without thinking you had begun telling her how he was in game design and was from LA just like you, but soon cut yourself off before you could talk about how cute his dog was. That’s when you realized you weren’t talking about Brian. Brian was in fucking accounting, not game design and was 100% allergic to any kind of animal. When your friend asked about your love life, you had him in mind and not Brian even though so much time had gone by.

You were starting to believe that you weren’t ready for a relationship at all.

Sighing, you figured that maybe chips would be a better and less smelly option for the plane ride. Knowing yourself you would probably dig into them within the first thirty minutes of the thirteen-hour trip. 

You whip around to find wherever your newly desired snack choice could be when you catch a glimpse of someone out of the corner of your eye. The goosebumps that make their way to the surface of your skin and the hair on the back of your neck standing up so eagerly causes your entire body to freeze with fear. There was only one person who made you feel this way, one person who made your blood run cold. The person you had just indirectly been thinking of.

No, no it couldn’t be. 

You’re afraid to turn around, because more than anything you don’t want to be right. If you felt stressed thinking about Brian, you were going to have a panic attack from seeing him. Pivoting yourself to the left, you bite your lip anxiously unsure of how you’re supposed to react if you are right. Taking in the sight behind you, you’re met with a father and daughter selecting candy from the shelves of the store. The individual causing your anxiety nowhere in sight. Your entire body relaxes. 

The last thing you wanted was a fiasco in the international terminal at LAX. It certainly wouldn’t do you, your family and your company any good to make headlines. It especially wouldn’t have made Brian happy; he probably would have called you a hundred times in worry. 

“I can’t fucking believe it.” 

And just like that you’re snapped out of your daze, your false security vanished, goosebumps emerging once again. This time there were no questions. That voice. It was him. 

Turning back around you find yourself under the gaze of your ex-boyfriend. Your ex-boyfriend who you haven’t seen in over two years. 

You wish you could say that time hadn’t been good to Mark, but that would be a bold-faced lie. He had somehow become even more attractive in the last two years and the only real thing that seemed different about him was his hair color. The last time you had seen him he had been blonde, but now he had opted for a dark brown color. As much as you hated thinking it, it definitely suited him.

The last two years felt like a long blur of trying to forget him and everything or everyone associated with him. Those were of course difficult things to do, many of the people in your shared three-year life with Mark becoming some of your closest allies and the fact that Mark wasn’t an easy person to erase. Since the two of you met – even when you were just friends – you had a magnetic like pull to one another that couldn’t just be forgotten and dismissed. You were even feeling it right now after everything. 

He’s wearing a tight smile, almost as if he too can’t believe you’re standing here in front of him. It was as though you were the one inconveniencing him, when he had been the one to even say something to you. If you had seen him first, you would have turned around and ran the other way pretending like it never happened. For some reason he was willing to acknowledge you. 

“I didn’t think I’d see you here,” his tight smile soon fades away and his voice is smooth as ice, a nonchalance to it that makes you question whether he even cares about this run in.

“Me either. Good to see you… Now if you’ll excuse me…” You replied pushing past him to continue your previous task of looking for chips. Much to your dislike, he follows you as you embark on one of the aisles, your eyes scanning the items placed out oh so carefully. 

“Aren’t you going to ask me how I’ve been? What I’ve been up to?” 

The last you had heard of Mark was that he had moved to Beijing after being given a position at a video game development company. At first you had been surprised at Mark taking a job overseas, he had always expressed to you how even over his own dead body he would never leave LA, but ultimately him in China relieved you. No longer did you have to avoid your favorite spots in the city for boba or the park bench where you got most of you best thinking done. You didn’t even have to be worried about getting invited to a party or dinner with a friend, wondering if Mark was going to show up. With Mark gone you could freely have your life back and not walk around with the fear of running into him. But you guessed that it could only have lasted so long before fate – as cruel as she was – brought you two together again. 

“No that’s okay. I’m good,” you go down another aisle, he still follows suit.

Where were those damn chips? 

“If you’re looking for the chips, they’re over there,” he said pointing behind you to the back wall in a location that you should have noticed sooner, “and if you want your favorite brand of salt & vinegar chips, they’re on the bottom shelf.”

Your stomach churned, he thought after all this time he would be able to still just know you like the back of his hand? What snack you’re looking for? What chips you like? No way. 

Wordlessly you march to the back and stare at the shelves in front of you. You felt your hand dangerously moving forward to the bottom to grab the salt & vinegar chips Mark mentioned, but you control yourself and pull back not wanting to give him the satisfaction. Instead you opt for plainly salted kettle chips. 

“Thanks… you’ve been a big help. See you never,” you scoffed turning around to face him and pushing past him to pay for your item, leaving Mark in the dust behind you. 

“What you’re not going to even pretend that it’s nice to see me?” 

“What the fuck do you want me to say?” you practically spat at him, the father and daughter from earlier staring at the two you, the father particularly appalled for your colorful choice of language. 

Mark’s silent and you turn back to the self-checkout to scan your chips, hopeful to not think about your ex-boyfriend for the next thirteen hours. He watches you carefully as you take out your wallet to pay and tap your card against the reader. It isn’t difficult for him to sense the tension in your body, he can see it just from you performing the simple and mundane task of paying. The worst part is that he knows he’s the cause. 

Grabbing your snack, you exit the small store and Mark follows you, grabbing your wrist, he tries again, “you could say something nice? Like you care? It’s been two years y/n… Can’t we just be normal people with each other?” 

At this you feel something in you snap, “I don’t care how much time has fucking passed Mark… I’m never going to get over you just completely throwing our relationship out the window. I can’t believe I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with you… I was so fucking dumb to think you cared about me for even one minute. So, to answer your question… no we can’t just be normal people with each other. We were never normal people with each other to begin with.” 

The two of you had started off as friends, just friends. It was something new for Mark, being just friends with a girl and not having sex attached. Many people in your life warned you not to get close to him, that he was just a fuckboy who didn’t care about the emotional – it was only the physical with him. Ultimately you ignored him, becoming his friend and finding that you two just worked together. First you worked together as friends and soon you fell under his Mark Tuan spell, working together as lovers. 

Throughout your entire relationship you did your best to trust Mark, which you accomplished for the most part, but in the back of your head you would constantly hear the voices of everyone around you. You would hear the stories of the girls he had before you and how terribly he treated them, but you ignored it all. After a while you started to think of it all a little less, people even congratulating you on lasting so long with Mark – something that tended to annoy you. You knew that they didn’t see the Mark that you knew, the Mark that wanted to be something else for you, the best for you. Then after three years together, almost a month after your anniversary, you found out he had been with someone else. 

The old Mark had perhaps never truly vanished, but was just immensely good at hiding. 

Now here you were in front of him and you couldn’t tell who this Mark was. 

Mark scoffed, “you haven’t changed at all…” Now he was mad at you? “It’s probably better we just say goodbye here.” 

You rolled your eyes, “That’s what I’ve been trying to do this whole time.” 

He wanted to say more, but looking at how annoyed you were at merely being close to him, he let it go. It was hard for him to understand how he was feeling. He longed for you, but he also felt a lot of anger towards you that he wasn’t sure how to control. 

Both of you stare at one another, neither of you wanting to be the first one to walk off. Without a word, you both collect yourselves and assumedly prepare to embark on your respective gates. Mark gives you a final glance with his fists now clenched in frustration and turns to walk toward his flight. 

You realize he’s going the same direction as you and you follow awkwardly behind. After a moment – as if he can sense you’re still there – he turns around and scowls at you. 

“Why are you following me?” 

You snorted, the actual audacity of Mark Tuan. This is an airport for fuckssake, you can’t control where your flight is, “as if I would ever follow you! I’m going to my gate! I think the better question is why are you following me?”

“I’m going to my gate!” 

“Okay!” You yell a little too loud, “Okay!” he repeated, matching your volume. You can sense that people are starting to stare at the two of you for your truly unprompted yelling. 

Mark looks back at you once again, rolling his eyes. The two of you may have gates in the same area, but you can’t stand to look at him any longer – much less his back which you couldn’t help but notice has become much broader. Not that you would admit it to him… or anyone. 

You pick up your pace, passing Mark and causing him to trail behind. You expect him to say some snarky remark or rude comment when you go in front of him, but instead all you hear is an annoyed groan. It’s when you finally reach your gate and sit down in the waiting area that you feel Mark is no longer right behind you, but instead frozen in the main concourse, in front of the space you’re seated in. He feels his mouth go dry and he wants to scream. All he wants is to just be rid of you, to not be forced to think of you when you’re right in front of him. He wanted to wipe his brain clean. 

It suddenly dawns you on the reason why Mark is frozen as if he can’t comprehend what he’s seeing. You stand up abruptly, “this can’t be happening.” 

He snaps out of his trance with your words and comes closer to the gate, approaching where you’re seated. You’re just about to wave your hands, warning him not to come any closer when he huffs and sits down on a chair only few away from your own. 

“You’re going to Seoul?” He says it as if you being allowed in the Korean peninsula is a disgusting idea. 

“I’ve been traveling between LA and Seoul every 2 months for the last year and a half, so yes I am. Aren’t you supposed to be going to Beijing or something?”

He smirked, “I thought you didn’t care about what I was up to?” 

“I only care if it assures that you’re as far away from me as humanely possible.”

Your ex looks at his watch and at the screen of the gate alerting passengers that boarding would begin in a few minutes, “well since you’re so curious. I didn’t like Beijing, so I found a job in Seoul that I like much better. 

“Didn’t want to come back to LA?” 

He looks back to you and you almost wish he hadn’t, “there’s not really a lot left in LA for me anymore.” 

Both of you stare at one another for a moment, and you feel your stomach flip. Does he mean what I think he means? Your eyes drift down to your lap and you feel yourself pulling out your phone, not needing any more Mark. 

You manage to pass 10 minutes this way, aimlessly refreshing your emails and ignoring Brian’s latest text asking if you’ve boarded yet. Being so engrossed in your phone, you didn’t even notice Mark’s constant glances up at you, wondering what you were looking at or who you were talking to. 

There it is again, he thought to himself, Do I care? Do I not care? What the fuck, make up your mind dude. 

When the call for First-Class boarding comes to your dismay, both you and Mark stand up. You try to just tell yourself that it’s not important, you would probably both be seated aisles apart, not having to spend any more unwarranted time together. 

Even when you’re finally on the plane and find yourself behind him once again in the aisle, you tell yourself that this will be the last moment you have to see Mark Tuan. 

“Here’s your seat sir, can I get you any drinks or snacks before take-off?” the flight attendant asked Mark when she shows him his seat. He gives this shit eating grin that makes you want to slap it off his face, you couldn’t believe he was doing this in front of you. What? Did he think he was going to get to fuck the flight attendant as an extra First-Class amenity? 

“Ah no thank you, I’m fine for now, but I’ll let you know if anything changes,” you feel awkward standing in the aisle watching this unfold, especially since you can see the attendant is giving in, blush creeping up on her face from Mark’s smooth gaze. You clear your throat, reminding her that you too are there and she quickly turns to you, an apologetic look on her face. 

“And here's your seat Miss,” she graciously steps back to let you slide into your seat and you don’t move.

This had to be a joke. 

You looked from your seat, to Mark’s and then to the flight attendant. 

“I can’t sit here... I’m sorry but there has to be another seat available.” 

“I’m sorry ma’am, but there are no other openings in First Class. We only have seats available back in economy.” 

This couldn’t be happening. You had been saving all of your miles for a First-Class upgrade for forever, there was no way you were going to give it up, “Mark move to coach.” 

“Huh? Are you joking? My company paid for this; I’m not moving back there! You move!” 

How were you supposed to sit in front of Mark Tuan for the next thirteen hours? The man who had loved you so deeply, but also caused you the most pain. 

Just as people had stared at the two of you in the terminal, the other passengers in your surrounding area were also beginning to look. Maybe if the two of you got into one of your notorious screaming matches, someone would feel bad enough and offer to trade. You couldn’t do that to someone, you wouldn’t wish being stuck next to Mark Tuan on a long-haul flight on your worst enemy. Well… Mark was your worst enemy. 

Smiling, you turn back to the flight attendant, “It’s fine… I’ll just stay here. Thank you though.” She gives you a smile, but you can sense some annoyance behind her eyes. You can’t blame her. 

Mark looks at you wide eyed, previously caught up in organizing his space, but snapping out his activities when he hears your dismissal about moving seats, “uh… what are you doing? Are you seriously going to sit here?” 

“Yes Mark. Unlike you, I paid for my seat so I’m not moving anywhere.” 

He scoffed, “Fine.” 

“Fine!” 

-- 

hour one 

“Ma’am could you tell the gentleman in 3A to stop chewing so loudly?” You asked the flight attendant, putting on the sweetest voice possible. Mark was driving you up the wall and you were only an hour into the flight. 

It was almost as though you could hear every single cough, every shifting in his seat and it was all driving you up the wall. Just knowing he was there irked you.

The flight attendant looks clueless and as she opens her mouth slowly, unsure of how to respond. You hear Mark’s low voice grumble from behind you, also addressing the attendant, “uh ma’am can you tell the lady in 2A to mind her own business, pop a xanny and just go to sleep?” 

She clearly wasn’t expecting to deal with any difficult passengers this early on in a thirteen-hour flight. For her sake you wish you could deal with Mark and be more civil, but that clearly wasn’t going to happen. 

hour three 

“Y/n…” 

Be strong, you tell yourself, don’t look back, you can get through this.  

“Y/n?” 

It’s probably not important… He just wants to annoy you. 

“Y/n!” 

Screw being strong. 

“What the fuck do you want?” Being in semi-pods in First-Class it was difficult to just whip around and face Mark, to show him your annoyance under the lights beginning to dim. 

“Do you have any extra AirPods?” 

“Why the fuck would I just carry around extra Airpods around with me? Are you an idiot?” You sneered. 

“Jesus Christ I was just asking. You don’t have to be so vicious. Maybe someone should fuck the tension out of you,” he said, mumbling the last part. He says it so quietly and so half assed that you almost think that you misheard him. 

“Choke on a dick Mark,” you replied quietly, not wanting the other passengers to hear or disturb the few who had already drifted asleep. 

He scoffed, “maybe you should be.” 

You were wrong, the Mark that you had reunited with was just the same old fuckboy Mark who didn’t give a fuck about anyone. 

Placing your AirPods in your ears, you close your eyes and ignore the rest of Mark’s efforts to speak to you, just wanting nothing more than to fall asleep and wake up in your hotel room in Seoul. 

hour seven 

You pop your headphones out of your ears in frustration, feeling as though you hadn’t managed to get any real sleep during the hours that had passed. You look behind you to Mark’s seat, and feel relieved to see his eyes closed and a slow, shallow breath coming from his mouth. 

It felt weird to gaze at Mark and know you were no longer apart of his life. Sure, it had been two years, but you hadn’t seen  him or had to deal with the reality that there was now a separate you and a separate Mark. Two entities that had nothing to do with one another anymore. Although sometimes it felt like you were still anchored to him. 

Suddenly he shifted over onto his side, mumbling incoherent words in his sleep. The only thing you could make out was your own name. It made you feel uncomfortable, not because he was clearly dreaming about you, but you felt as though you were invading his private space, infiltrating an intimate moment. 

“y/n… please…” he mumbled. 

You felt like you’d heard enough. The flight was making you restless and you weren’t sure what you would do if you kept listening to Mark’s breathless calls for you. Standing up, you decide it’s probably best now to stretch and go to the bathroom, before you embark on your further slumber. 

When you finish up in the bathroom, you almost have a heart attack pulling back the door to be met with Mark’s tall figure.

“Oh my god you scared me,” you said placing your hand on your chest. You shake your head, stepping out of the bathroom with the door closing firmly behind you. Attempting to go back to your seat, you position yourself to move past him, but he moves along with you to keep you from leaving.

“What are you doing?” 

Mark doesn’t know what’s taken over him, he had woken up in a frenzy, his dreams not doing anything to help his mental state. He hadn’t dreamt about you in months, but of course as soon as you’re back in his life he has to have fantasies of you wrapped around him once again. It was torturous, especially with you only a few feet away from him. He dreamed about having you every way and any way, feeling like he was going crazy. When he saw you missing from your seat, he immediately got up almost as if in a sleep induced haze unable to control his actions.

"When are you going to stop pretending that you don’t want to be under me again?” he purred.

Your blood goes cold. Was he drunk? His words make you nervous, scared that someone could hear, but looking around the dark cabin it seemed as though everyone in First-Class was fast asleep. 

“Mark…” you begin, your tone clearly frustrated, but also weakening a bit, clearly evident that his words are affecting you. It had been so long since someone talked to you like this, and you felt that the hours you had spent on the plane already altering your sanity.

“You were always such a good girl for me, what changed? When did you become so stubborn? What happened to my girl who was always so willing and sweet?” 

“I was screwed over by an asshole, that’s what happened,” you mumbled trying to avert his gaze and prayed that maybe if you weren’t to look at him you could pretend that there wasn’t a part of you hanging on his every word. 

“That was in the past. I’ve changed now… But I’m still your boy. Even after two fucking years, I’m still yours.” 

You want to fight with him, say that if he was always your boy and still is then he would have never cheated on you. He would have never spent a night with someone else.  

“Let me fuck the anger out of you.” 

“What?” Okay he had to be drunk.

“You and I have too much sexual tension, and we’re both angry so let’s just fuck to relieve the tension.” 

“You’ve said some pretty fucking dumb things before, but this is… this is…” you drift unsure of what exactly you think it is. 

“A good idea?” 

“Mark I’m not having sex with you in an airplane bathroom.” 

“What? Like that’s bothered you before?” 

When you were with Mark, the two of you would have sex in the riskiest places, so you weren’t a stranger to the kind of sex where you could be caught at any moment, but you had never joined the mile-high club before. 

“We’re not together. I hate you and you hate me… for some reason.” You never understood why exactly Mark had been mad at you all of these years and acted as though you were the devil himself when he had been the one that ruined the two of you. Maybe it was because you hadn’t given him a second chance? Maybe it was from the influence of you hating him? Or maybe it was because you had never been enough for him, otherwise what would have caused him to spend the night with another woman? 

Mark clicked his tongue and it causes you to bring your attention to his mouth. It almost makes you lose focus completely. “So what if we’re not together anymore? Does that matter?” 

Does that matter? 

His words make you remember something. Something very important. 

Brian. 

“Yes, it matters. I-I have a boyfriend,” for some reason the word “boyfriend” seems to be hard to get out. It was always weird to associate Brian as your boyfriend or your “partner,” but saying it to Mark felt like the weight of a ton of bricks. 

In the dark lighting of the cabin you can just make out the frown that spreads across Mark’s face. Just as quickly as it appears, it’s gone and the cocky façade is back. 

“And that’s a problem?” your ex asked. 

As you’re about to protest and tell him that commitment in relationships is important to you, Mark reaches his hand out to rest on your bare shoulder, running it softly up and down your arms in a soothing pattern. It was a common gesture between the two of you, something Mark would constantly do whenever you were telling a story or the times you would fall asleep at night. It puts you at ease and you feel yourself close your eyes at his touch. 

Mark would be lying if he said the word “boyfriend” coming out of your mouth didn’t disappoint him. In fact, he felt a similar pain to the one he felt two years ago when you had broken up with him. Mark wasn’t daft, he knew what you thought of him – a player, a fuckboy and someone who never cared about you in the first place. It hurt him to know that you were just like everyone else around him who had a preconceived notion of who he was or what he did. At one point in time he thought you were different. 

But now looking at you and having you back in his life – even for only a thirteen-hour plane ride, he just wanted you back in his arms, back under his touch. He knew he should have felt guilty for not giving one fuck about this “boyfriend” you had acquired at some point during your two years apart, but he didn’t care. If he was going to have to be that cocky fuckboy who paid no mind to any consequences to get you, then so be it. 

“Come on… it’s been two years… let me feel that pussy that I’ve missed so so much,” he whispered seductively against the shell of your ear, “let me fuck into it so good, because I know no one’s filled it up so well since me. Especially not that boyfriend.” 

His words cause you to moan involuntarily and the noise awakens both you and him. You immediately shoot your hand up to cover your mouth, unsure of what’s getting into you. You were supposed to hate Mark, you had spent the last two years training yourself to hate him just in case a moment like this were ever to arise. But maybe that was an easier thing to imagine when you hadn’t seen him, because now with his hands gently caressing you and his request to be inside of you once again, you feel anything but hate. You feel want.

“Fuck Mark…” 

“Just say the word baby, and you have me,” he whispered, delicately placing an open mouth kiss on your wrist, slowly continuing up your arm. 

What were the pros and cons of this? If you were in any other difficult situation you would take a pause and list all of the good and bad things that could come from this. The big con was Brian… Even if you had been feeling strange about where your relationship with him was going and found him to be suffocating, you couldn’t do to him what Mark had done to you. Another negative factor emerged in your mind… you didn’t want to be put under Mark’s spell again, you couldn’t. Even being this close to him made you feel things that you had been trying to forget for two years, sleeping with him after all this time would only make it worse. That worried you. But judging on the primal way your body was reacting to Mark – your wet core being a clear sign – you knew this wasn’t going to be a logical decision where the cons outweigh the pros. 

“I-” you’re about to do it, you’re about to gain enough strength to tell him you don’t want him anymore, but when he pushes your hair away from where it lays on your shoulder and attaches his lips to the side of your neck, any willpower you had vanishing. His gentle sucking on the sweet spot of your neck that he knows oh too well causes you to let out a whimper and he smiles against your skin, knowing he has you. 

“Do it,” you mumbled, eyes still closed. 

Mark brings his lips back to your ear, “do what baby?” His cocky tone makes you want to roll you eyes. He had always done this – torture you until you were begging to feel his touch. 

You open your eyes and give yourself a moment to readjust to the dark lighting of the plane and focus on Mark’s face in the small space in front of the bathroom. You want to see his gaze when you make your non-logical decision.

“Fuck me.” 

The corner of his mouth turns upwards as he brings his arm forward and behind you to pull open the bathroom door, pushing you backwards into the cramped space. 

It’s when he’s pressed up against you and locks the door behind him that the reality of what you’re doing sets in. Just as you feel yourself get used to the harsh lighting, you freeze at Mark’s intense stare. 

“What are you looking at?” You asked. 

He smiled and glanced down at the floor shyly, then back up at you, “You.” 

For the first time since seeing him again at the airport store you feel those feelings in your stomach. No hate, no indifference and no bitterness towards Mark - not even just lust. Instead you felt a warmth for him that reminded you of the good days, not the bad ones. The swell in your heart worried you and you didn’t want to feel or dwell on it so you lean forward and kiss him.

Mark’s lips on yours doesn’t do anything to eliminate the softness you felt for him moments before, if anything it only intensifies it. It feels as though no time has passed for the two of you and the missing piece of the puzzle that you had been searching for has finally found its way back to you. 

A low growl comes from Mark’s throat and it sends your hands to find shelter in his hair. When you were together you had always had a weird thing for Mark’s hair. You loved running your fingers through it, gently massaging his scalp and tugging at the roots. Mark would always joke that you would probably break up with him if he ever shaved his head, which you didn’t exactly argue with. And now it just felt so good to have your hands where they belong. It’s almost as though Mark’s read your mind and he smiles against you lips when he feels your hands, “pull as hard as you want.” 

You feel his tongue at the seam of your lips, urging itself through to deepen the kiss and you tell yourself that it’s not too late, this can be the moment that you opt out for what a mistake this would be. With his hands drifting down from your hips to your ass, you feel yourself part your mouth voluntarily, realizing that you don’t want to stop this. You want to make this mistake; you want nothing more than to let him feel you and taste you even more. 

“I want to taste you so bad,” Mark whispered against your lips, “see if you taste as good as I remember.” 

You want that more than anything. Mark had always been so good with his tongue and just thinking about the hours he had spent between your thighs in the past made you even wetter than when you were having sex with Brian. Judging however, on the space you were both in, you didn’t know if it was physically possible. He can sense your hesitancy by the way your lips begin to still against his. 

He breaks apart from you and gently rubs his thumb along your jawline and lips, “don’t think too much.” In an instant Mark’s crouched down in the very small space in the bathroom and you immediately find yourself worried about his comfort level, “are you sure you’re okay?” 

He looked up at you, a dark look in his eyes and waved you off, “don’t worry about me babe, I’m about to have the best meal of my life.” At the end of his sentence he reaches up to the hem of your leggings and pulls them, along with your panties down in one sweep, pushing them aside. You’re almost surprised at his loftiness, but you remind yourself that it’s Mark. He moves a hand around to the back of your knee, hoisting one of your legs up onto the closed toilet seat, pushing the rest of your body up against the small sink counter. Although the space was already limited as it was, the position brought your core closer to his face and as you looked down to see the way his tongue stroked across his lips, you felt yourself already get lightheaded. 

He began with leaving open mouth kisses along the inside of your lifted thigh and another on the top of your pubic mound. It was enough to make you feel shaky, as though the one leg that was supporting your weight would give out at any moment. You found yourself unfazed, you knew Mark would be there to catch you if you fell. 

Mark leaned in further, his tongue delving between you folds to gather up as much of your wetness as he could, giving you a noisy taste that had him groaning, head pulling back and licking his lips after his first taste in two years.

“You taste even better than I remember, how the fuck could you get sweeter? I don’t even want to go back to my seat after tasting you, I could sit in this bathroom with my mouth on you till the end of the flight.” 

You found yourself wanting nothing more than to be stuck in this crammed bathroom with Mark for as long as you both could get away with. The person who was contemplating whether or not this was a bad idea didn’t even exist to you anymore. One lap of his tongue on you and you were reminded of all the ways he could make you fall apart. 

He tongued your clit slowly at first, every stroke almost teasing – as if he was making up for the years you two spent a part. His tongue would slip lower, working its way along your gushing entrance to remind you how much he relished your flavor before returning to your clit, the wet sounds of Mark’s sucking not even embarrassing to you. It was when Mark began to groan against you and swirl his tongue and suck that you felt your hands go back to his hair, roughly pulling him closer. 

“Mark, I-I can’t… I’m gonna – fuck,” you moaned out unable to form a functional and coherent thought. As you feel your orgasm on the horizon and just around the corner, you tug at Mark’s roots further, which encourages him to pick up the pace of his tongue, wanting you to cum on his face just like you had many times before. He wanted to drive you to the brink of pleasure, but he also wanted to prove to himself that he could still bring you to the edge with just his tongue.

Any delicacy he had been exhibiting before is completely gone, the way he laps at your clit and swirls his tongue around your sensitive bundle of nerves causes your chest to heave and sweat on your brow. You’re so caught up in Mark that you barely notice your foot beginning to slip from its security on the toilet. Mark swiftly acknowledges your pending loss of balance and tugs the leg up onto his shoulder, not removing himself from you for even a moment. 

You could feel yourself twitch and the arching of your hips towards his face, “come on baby I know how close you are, I need you to cum for me. Cum for me like all the times before, all over my face. I want it so bad.” 

Mark’s muffled words against you and the final groans he emits from how much he loves your taste is the last straw as you finally let go and the waves of release crash over you. He doesn’t give way as you buck yourself further into him one final time, his back practically hitting the wall of the bathroom. Your body comes down from your climax and you look to see Mark gratefully clean up the release he caused. When he takes his mouth away, you feel your core wavering against the emptiness and loss of warmth it had felt, almost as though it wanted Mark to be a permanent attachment to you. You’re breathless, head falling back to the mirror behind you as Mark stands up, wiping the back of his mouth and jawline which had become messy and shiny with your juices. 

“I knew you were still my little slut,” he pushes the hair that had fallen in front of your face behind you, “letting me have you in a fucking bathroom at 35,000 feet. How else will you let me have you?” He asked attaching his lips back to that spot on your neck. 

It dawns on you that there’s no winning. You once again are completely under the spell and at the mercy of Mark Tuan, willing to let him do whatever he wants to you. “M-Mark whatever you want.” At your response he simply smirked, quickly pulling his joggers and boxers down, his painfully hard cock slapping against his lower stomach. 

“Fuck I’ve been waiting so long to have you around me again. I never thought I would, and I’m going to make every second count.” 

He positions himself in between your legs, gripping your hips and pauses for a moment, clearly contemplating something. Mark hadn’t planned on having sex on the plane, nor did he plan on even seeing you again. 

“Mark if it’s about the condom, it’s fine… I don’t care, I’m still on the pill and I-I trust you.” 

At your trust in him, something he had so deeply been wanting all these years, he doesn’t hesitant another moment at placing himself at your entrance. His teasingly slow rubbing against your slit causes you to let out almost a growl at how much you needed him to be inside of you.

“How much do you want it y/n?” 

“So bad.” 

He pushes into you suddenly, “you’re still my cockslut, huh?” The feeling is too good and too great to answer him, but he’s not satisfied with your nonresponse.

“Answer me.” He sunk himself inside of you further and you do your best to let out the smallest and most inaudible “yes” you’ve ever heard, which thankfully seems to be enough for him. 

“God,” he groaned, “you’re still so tight.” He looks down at the space where your bodies meet, fixating his gaze at the visual of his cock slipping inside your sensitive and swollen folds. Mark waited for a moment for your pussy to get used to having him inside you again, to get reintroduced to his length and girth which it had been so accustomed to in the past. Despite the time that had passed, you felt no discomfort except for the mental discomfort in your head that just wanted him to fuck into you quickly and harshly. 

“Taking me so well, squeezing every inch of me. This pussy knows who it belongs to, who it deserves to be fucked by.” 

“M-Mark,” a final moan of his name is all it takes for him to begin his first real thrust into you, pulling himself out almost entirely. You feel so sensitive and overworked from your earlier orgasm that you aren’t sure how long you can last with the way your walls are clenching around Mark. 

His pace soon became brutal and you’re thankful the loud sound of the engine could cover up the whimpers coming from your mouth and the sounds of skin slapping against skin. Mark’s fingers press into your hips so firmly that you know there will be bruises that you’ll have to explain later, but for now the only thing you can focus on is how full Mark is making you feel. He removes his hand from your side and brings it down between the two of you, fixating on your clit, rubbing until it ached. It caused your body to clench on him further, the continual touch and his fucking into you making you roll your eyes into the back of your head. 

Mark groaned at how snug you felt and how deep you were taking him, his head falling into the crook of your neck and against the bathroom mirror, “whose are you?” 

You know what he wants you to say, but you don’t know if it’s the right thing to do, even in the heat of the moment. It could lead to misunderstandings and a more complex outcome than just that of having sex with him in a fucking airplane bathroom. 

“Whose are you?” He repeated, this time a little bit softer and removing his head from your shoulder to look at you with worrisome eyes. Mark knows that if you say you’re his it’d most likely be untrue, but he doesn’t care. He just wants to hear it one more time, even if it’s a complete and utter lie. He wants to know he has you, even if it’s for this one moment. 

“Yours, I’m all yours,” you breathe out. It comes out on its own, without any time for you to process or comprehend what you’re saying. It surprises you so much that you aren’t even sure if it’s a lie or not. 

That’s all he needed and he thrusts into you even harder, hitting the spot inside of you that makes you want to completely fall apart and combust. You’re too caught up in the pleasure of him ramming into you that you don’t even feel the pain that comes with your backside being continually pushed into small counter of the sink. 

“Cum for me baby, I’m close and I need us to do this together. It’s all I want,” Mark said. His tone perplexes you. It’s forceful and authoritative something that you were no stranger to when it came to sex with Mark, but there was a clear tenderness to it that had you second guessing everything. Maybe this wasn’t just sex. 

It’s one more strum of his cock against your g-spot and the pinching of your clit with his thumb and index finger that has you climaxing around him. The almost violent pulse from your pussy around him due to your orgasm has Mark following close behind, spilling himself deep inside of you. The ecstasy coursing through you causes your entire body to shake and twitch, wanting to collapse completely onto the bathroom floor. You fall against Mark’s body and in his own exhausted state he holds you close, protectively wrapping his arms around you making you feel secure. 

You should want to get out of the situation immediately as a one-time thing, but somehow you can’t bring it in you to remove yourself from his grasp. You felt at home with Mark’s arms around you and him still inside of you. It was a comfort a sense of normalcy you hadn’t felt with anyone since Mark. He softly strokes your hair, placing gentle kisses on the top of your head remembering how much you liked it after a tiring session of sex.

It feels as though no time has passed, but soon you find yourself out of Mark’s hold. He removes his now soft cock from you and you can feel yours and his cum leaking from your core, down to your thighs. It’s almost as though this movement has finally woken you up. You delicately collapse onto the toilet, making sure to take extra care with your now jelly-like legs. With your head in your hands in disbelief at the actions you had just willingly followed through on, Mark stares at you. 

“Fuck… I’m so mad at myself.”

With the small amount of space, he has, Mark shifts his weight from one foot to the other, “why? That was so fucking great.” 

You looked up at him in a scolding manner, he still had no perception of reality, but apparently now you were one and the same. “Because now I did the same thing to Brian that you did to me.”

There’s a pause and Mark avoids all eye contact with you. He had imagined this talk so many times – the talk the two of you never got to have and he really didn’t want it to be here, like this. But by some strike of luck, fate had brought you back to him, even for a short period of time and he may never get the opportunity to come clean again. 

Choosing to continue to avert your gaze, Mark sighs deeply and busies himself with pulling up his joggers. 

“I didn’t cheat on you.”  

You feel like ice and your whole body goes numb, “W-what?” 

He sighs again, looking down, “I never cheated on you.” 

You think there’s no way you could have heard him correctly. Your entire break up, the reason you ended your passionate love story with the one person you saw a future with came from his cheating. It couldn’t be a lie… Could it? 

One thing was for certain, you knew Mark so well and judging by the fidgeting and fiddling with his fingers you can tell you still do. And he was telling the truth. Your stomach flipped. 

“Then why did you let me believe that you did?”

“You were the only person in my life who didn’t believe all those stupid rumors about me, the only person who didn’t believe I was a fuckboy like everyone thought… but then the moment someone tells you they think they saw me with someone, you pack your bags. I figured you wouldn’t believe me, just like everyone else.”

It’s ridiculous. The words coming out of his mouth are ridiculous, but part of you understands what he’s saying. Maybe you had been too quick to judge, too quick to believe everyone else’s preconceived notions regarding your own boyfriend, but what were you supposed to do when he didn’t even defend himself? 

“You know… even after all this time, I still don’t know why I hated you. I really don’t know if it was because I thought you cheated or because you never went after me when I left.” 

Mark’s silent, and the weight of the situation continues to hit the two of you like a bus. Part of you feels betrayed by him. More betrayal then when you first heard the rumors. The two of you could have been together this whole time, saved each other from years of pain, sorrow and longing, but instead it’s almost as though he forced it upon you both.

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me. Jesus fuck Mark we’re not Marianne and Connell from Normal People, we can talk to each other.” 

He furrowed his eyebrows, “Who?” 

“I’ve been watching a lot of TV since we broke up.” 

There’s another silence between the two of you and in the small space it feels deafening and suffocating. You want nothing more than to go back to your seat and forget this even happened. Weirdly enough, the sex part you were fine with. It was this conversation that left you feeling like you couldn’t get a proper breath of air into your lungs, almost as if you were drowning. 

You take a piece of toilet paper from the roll beside you and use it to attempt to clean up the mess that had already begun drying on your legs. Mark watches you mindlessly, unsure of what to say himself. He knows he made a mistake from not telling you and effectively keeping the two of you apart, but every time he would reach for the phone to dial your number he would be reminded of the pain he felt and all the things you had called him that day. 

Everyone was right! Why didn’t I just fucking listen to them? Does a three year relationship mean nothing to you? I thought you changed… were different… but now I just feel like I wasted my time.

“I-I really don’t know what to say if I’m honest,” you finally stuttered out, grabbing your discarded leggings and pulling them on, “did you want me to leave you?”

Mark shakes his head vigorously, completely taken aback at you even thinking that, “no... Not at all... I just- it was complicated.”

“Right and you don’t do complicated. Got it.” You stand up and move to unlock the door, but Mark moves in front of you as he did earlier. 

“Y/n... Can we just talk about this? When we land can we just go to a cafe and talk about everything? I still- I mean... even after all this time I-” He begins, but you’re too scared to hear him finish the sentence.

“Mark we’ve had a lot of time to talk. Just please let me go back to my seat.” 

This time he makes no effort to stop you from leaving and you quickly slip out of the bathroom, fearful someone might see you. Luckily, everyone is still fast asleep and you walk back down the aisle to your seat wanting to forget about what Mark had said.  

You couldn’t deal with the what ifs, you couldn’t get lost in a fantasy of imagining that maybe you and Mark could be married already if he would have just said something. You couldn’t be that cruel to yourself.

After a few moments, you notice the bathroom occupied sign go away, signaling Mark’s arrival back to his seat. 

He knows he could just sit down and go back to sleep, falling back in to the way things were. But he had already not tried to go after you once before and he had been regretting it ever since. He had to say fuck that to all of the fears he had of being judged and put trust back into someone again. He wanted you.

Your eyes which had drifted closed soon shot open as you felt a movement at the side of your chair, turning to see Mark crouched down next you

“What are you doing?” You asked.

“I already let go of you once, I’m not doing it again. If I have to spend the next,” he brings his watch up to look at the time, “six hours convincing you, then so be it. I’m not letting walk away from me this time.” At his final word he moves his hand to brush a strand of hair behind your ear and goes to sit down. His eyes piercing into the back of your seat.

You felt Mark’s words, you felt them deeply in every part of you and it made you think that the Mark you love was still in there. 

Love.

You still loved him.

The beating of your heart made it difficult to fall asleep, but when you finally did you had a decision made and a smile on your face. 

[avmisworld]

Jungkook as your boyfriend:

●     Y'all know Jungkook is MAJOR bf material

●     The cutest bean uwu

●     At the start of your relationship he was probably a bit awkward

●     The poor guy is so inexperienced he forgot what it's like talking to a girl who isn't doing his makeup lol

●     Is scared to do something you won't like so he's always really careful with his words and actions

●     Eventually he'll ease into it and become the shameless loving crackhead you know today

●     But sometimes he'll still get a little shy

●     Whenever he says something too cheesy or makes a cute mistake or you compliment him

●     Always has the cutest bunny smile during these moments

●     Always puts your needs before his own

●     If you're a foreigner, he'll spend hours learning your native language

●     Even though you know Korean and you have no problem communicating uwu

●     Makes sure you're eating well and sleeping enough

●     Even when he's on diets and sleeps two hours a day max :(

●     Always insists to help you even if you don't need it

●     "Y/N, let me help you"

●     "Babe, I'm combing my hair..?"

●     Is always ready to tell you how amazing and beautiful you are whenever you get insecure about your body and talents :'(

●     Is legitimately confused why you would ever be insecure in the first place

●     When he is insecure tho

●     You just tell him the harsh truth

●     That he's the world's cutest, most talented and golden bunny, and he's precious to ARMY and to his members uwu

●     Tells you he loves you at least a hundred times a day just to see you blush and avoid his eyes cutely

●     His favorite thing is making you laugh

●     Loves it when you make him laugh as well

●     He's an hilarious person so he doesn't have to try much to succeed

●     Loves to make funny faces at you during one of your fake-serious banters

●     You two have a shit ton of private jokes (wtf is funny about a plastic cup????)

●     You live on sending each other memes and stupid videos of people falling down stairs lmfao

●     You two are severe crackheads oof

●     It's very likely to find the two of you awake at 3 am having a dance party or karaoke after too much wine

●     Constantly having tickle fights, wrestling matches, pillow fights, what not

●     Do not forget that JK is a savage little shit

●     And that doesn't change because you are his girlfriend *sigh*

●     Teases you about everything and anything

●     Places things high up on purpose just so he can show up later with his chest puffed out and take it down for you with a smirk

●     "Did I hear a damsel in distress?"

●     But makes sure not to take it too far uwu

●     This kid is competitive af omg

●     A relationship with him means turning everything into some race or bet

●     "I bet I can finish this hot dog faster than you"

●     "Whoever brushes their teeth faster gets to shower first!"

●     You see this a lot when the two of you game as well

●     There is no way you can date Jeon Jungkook without playing Overwatch at least once lol

●     Video game tournaments

●     He wins most of the time but if he'll ever lose it's because he let you smh

●     Is competitive also when it comes to other people

●     Always has to prove to you that he's the best and that you made the right choice dating him

●     Like you would ever doubt that pffft

●     Whenever someone impresses you Jungkook would just jump out and be like

●     "That's pretty cool, but did you see the new move I learned?" *breaks neck*

●     Going to a fun fair would just be you going back home with a truckload of plushies from Jungkook winning in all the booths kfkfkd

●     Dates with him are so cute and fun

●     He loves taking you out sm

●     It doesn't matter if it's movie night, ramen dates, dinner dates, lunch dates, beach dates, amusement park dates, coffee dates, workout dates, study dates, ice-skating dates

●     Jungkook's inner child always comes out with you

●     Probably because he never really got the time to be a real child :(

●     You're the only person aside from his members and family who gets to see the real him

●     He's so whipped for you

●     Literal heart eyes

●     Can't stop staring at you with twinkling eyes and a wide bunny smile

●     When you catch him he'll look away and blush but he'll feel satisfied when he sees you blush as well uwu

●     He finds everything you do adorable and can't help but send you bashful laughs and affectionate gazes

●     even if he won't admit it kkk

●     Compliments you all the time

●     Compliments about your looks, your outfits, your smallest, most insignificant achievements uwu

●     Always notices the small things about you that no one else does

●     "Wow, Y/N, these new earrings look so good on you, babe"

●     Basically Jungkook loves to spoil you hehe

●     Buys you presents all the damn time

●     You don't encourage him to do so because you hate feeling like he's your sugar daddy or smth and you aren't with him from his money

●     But he just can't help it when he sees something he knows you'll like

●     Spends more time shopping for you than for himself

●     But it's all worth the gleam of excitement in your eyes when you see his presents

●     Even if you playfully slap him and pout

●     "I told you to stop wasting money on me!"

●     Also makes you his own personal presents uwu

●     Usually gives you them before he goes on tour to cheer you up

●     Anything from portraits of you he drew secretly, to paintings of beautiful landscapes, to songs he wrote for you, to a collage of pictures you took of you

●     Jungkook loves taking pictures and videos of you

●     Takes snaps of you secretly cause he knows you're shy uwu

●     His camera roll and gallery is entirely filled with pictures of you sleeping, eating, laughing, smiling, staring, talking, etc…

●     Plus cute selfies and candid shots of the two of you with huge grins and arms wrapped around each other

●     And memey selfies of the two of you that you would literally bury yourself if anyone would find lol

●     Also has little, random videos of you just scrolling on your phone or something

●     "Y/N, look at mee~~"

●     It's really hard when Jungkook leaves for tour for both of you

●     Late night video calls almost every day

●     Even when Kook is after a concert, with his eyelids sticking to each other like glue ��-π

●     Calls you half asleep and the two of you just talk about meaningless stuff until one of you falls asleep uwu

●     Sends you snaps all day of him and the guys and everything they're doing

●     Does it so you'll see he's having fun and staying healthy

●     Wants you to do the same so you send him selfies of you and your boring university lifestyle

●     He insists that he finds it interesting and that he wants to see your face

●     "I can't be deprived of touching you and seeing you! It's too much."

●     Doesn't answer texts ever so you mostly communicate through phone/video calls and snaps/memes

●     When he comes back from tour you wait for him at the airport

●     His face lights up when he sees you and he smiles so wide π-π

●     No matter how exhausted he is he runs to you like a lighting bolt

●     Hugs you tightly and twirls you around while the other members watch fondly

●     One of the few times he'll agree to so much PDA

●     Usually he doesn't really like being too touchy in public

●     But he always holds your hand just to make sure you're next to him, safe and sound uwu

●     Brings you so much souvenirs from his trip abroad to make you feel like you were there with him

●     Snow globes, magnets, clothes, key chains, plushies…

●     All of it to remind you he thought about you every single day he was away

●     When you're together you're so domestic

●     If it's making food together, Jungkook teaching you BTS' newest choreo, working out, or even cleaning the house together

●     Nothing's boring with Jungkook

●     He's a whole different person when you're alone

●     Calls you sweet nicknames like "baby", "babe", "jagi", "princess" and "angel"

●     He's singing all day so it feels like your constantly stuck in "The Greatest Showman"

●     But you can't really complain cause Gukkie's sweet honey voice is your favourite thing to hear

●     Sometimes he'll talk to you in songs only to piss you off

●     But most of the time he'll sing to you when you can't sleep or when you feel sad or sick

●     He'll comb his hands through your hair gently while he sings to you softly *heart-attack*

●     Picks you up all the time

●     It might be because he loves to prove that he's strong enough to protect you and cherish you

●     But also because he loves hearing your shrieks of surprise and soft laughter

●     Piggybacks on the street, carrying you bridal style around the house, lifting you up like a baby in his arms when you playfully fight and twirling you around

●     Just all the time really

●     "Okay, okay, I'm sorry~~ Please let me down"

●     Because you live together when he's in Korea you're always stealing his clothes

●     He pretends to not like it and demands you to give it back to him

●     But if you're ever cold or in the need of some clothing he'll be the first to throw you his wardrobe

●     His slightly possessive nature feeds off seeing you all small and soft in his clothes

●     It probably turns him on tbh

●     Because of this he has a big thing for couple items as well

●     Whether it's outfits, phone cases, lockscreens, accessories, and eventually jewelry (like promise rings uwu)

●     Brags about you to the members 24/7

●     "Look at this picture I took of Y/N when she wasn't looking! Isn't she the prettiest?"

●     "Hyung, did you hear that Y/N was voted for best student in her class? Wah, I was really so impressed! She's a genius."

●     The members high-key tease him for it and say it's annoying

●     But they secretly think it's adorable how happy you make him and adore you so much for it fr

●     You getting along with the rest of the members so well makes Jungkook really happy

●     Even though he might get too protective sometimes

●     Gets jealous often and is horrible at hiding it despite not saying it directly smh

●     Watches from afar when you laugh at something Taehyung says, pinching his cheek lightly

●     His eyebrows are furrowed and he's tonguing his cheek like he always does when he's jealous

●     Eventually he has enough and comes over to you

●     Pecks your cheek or pulls you to sit in his lap and tells everyone about the date you have planned for tomorrow

●     "So, me and Y/N are planning to go to a picnic tomorrow at Han river…"

●     And you're trying so hard not to smile cause he's just being so obvious and you find it cute

●     A few time his jealousy leads to fights tho

●     Fighting with Jungkook in general is a rare occurrence

●     But when you do fight it can get pretty bad

●     Rather than shouting or losing his temper, Jungkook tends to shut himself off when the fight is serious

●     He stays quiet and talks only when it's necessary

●     "Whatever" "Do what you want"

●     It's mostly because he's afraid to say something he'll regret later

●     He'll probably leave the apartment and go to the gym/studio/dorm room to calm down and clear his head

●     Because both of you have big egos, it might take a few days to make up

●     If Jungkook's at fault, he will eventually swallow his pride and apologize to you

●     If it were the other way around tho

●     You're not going to hear a word from him until you admit you were at fault

●     No matter how much it'll hurt him to be away from you

●     Even after the fight is over it might take a little time for things to go back to how they were

●     Because Jungkook's pride and insecurities might get in the way of him approaching you

●     But with enough patience you'll be back to being the inseparable couple you were before

●     In case you think I forgot

●     Skinship is a must in your relationship

●     Jungkook loves to cuddle with you

●     He's always the big spoon, with his hands underneath your (his) shirt, just gently caressing the skin of your stomach and hips

●     Or with you laying on top of his chest, legs tangled together

●     A lot of times cuddling leads to heated make out sessions and even more

●     When he's troubled or exhausted he likes to nuzzle his head in the junction between your shoulder and neck and just breathe you in

●     Tight hugs when you see each other after a while with his hands pressing your face to his chest protectively

●     Back hugs are a must obviously

●     Creeps up behind you when you're working and scares the frick out of you when he wraps his arms around your waist

●     Loves forehead kisses because it's another opportunity to boast about how tall he is smh

●     Also cheek kisses, nose kisses, ear kisses, neck kisses, knuckle kisses and lip kisses ofc lol

●     Kisses you out of the blue and then pretends like nothing happened

●     "Sorry, I couldn't help it"

●     Lots of sweet, soft, loving kisses uwu

●     Has a thing for nibbling/biting you (mostly your earlobe/bottom lip/fingers)

●     Loves giving hickeys oml

●     It fits his possessive nature perfectly

●     The more people know you belong to him, the better

●     Loves when you sit in his lap skdjd

●     He wraps his arms around your stomach and pulls you closer so he can place his chin on your shoulder, occasionally leaving butterfly kisses all over your neck and shoulders

●     Also into cuter things like poking your cheeks when you do something cute, ruffling your hair, tickling you and pinching your cheeks and bopping your nose.

●     When it comes to bed, Jungkook is definitely a dom

●     Just like he is on stage kdkck

●     Puts your pleasure before his own and makes sure you're a 10474859% with whatever he's doing beforehand

●     Sex after a fight or after he gets jealous and needs to remind himself you're only his

●     Dirty talk ahhhh

●     He can also be soft tho

●     Like when he's making love to you omg my hearteu

●     Whispering praises and sweet words in your ear

●     Staring into your eyes with his dark, intense ones

●     Moans alot and likes it when you do too

●     Occasionally he lets you have the upper hand

●     Doesn't spend too much time on aftercare because he wants to go back to holding you as quickly as possible

●     The two of you fall asleep naked with your bodies completely tangled together

●     Also likes showering with you

●     less in a sexual way and more as another opportunity to pamper you

●     Scrubs you carefully and puts shampoo for you

●     Uses soap foam to grow you a fake beard this boi srsly

●     Basically he loves you like no one else and you're destined to be

●     The best boi there is <3

[nomoregoldfish]

Imagine Pacho Sends You as a Gift to (Spy on) Amado 2/3

This is getting out of hand again, smh. (Not really) Warning: everyone loves Pacho. Un-betaed, I’ll post the entire thing on AO3 later. For now, you can find part 1 here.

Amado is occupied with all sorts of business affairs after you land in DF, leaving you to his younger brother Vicente. You quickly learn Vicente is in charge of security of all cartel business, that's something, you assume.

When asked why you don't go to Juárez directly, Vicente tells you Amado has several meetings with some important figures in DF. You have to figure out a way to infiltrate the plaza to learn more about Amado, staying at a luxury apartment owned by the narcos won't get you anything useful.

"She's crazy!" Vicente's whining when Amado finally shows up late that night, "She woke up at 5 in the morning for a fucking jog and dragged my ass to a wet market before it even opened. And that's not the end of it, she bought so much fish and my car still smells like a stinky fish tank right now."

Vicente is a bit exaggerating but you do have a fruitful trip to the local market. 

"Yet you finished everything she cooked." Amado points at the empty plates on the dining table, not annoyed at all.

"Do you have some leftovers?" The tall Mexican turns to you. Vicente interrupts, "No, we ate all salmon sashimi because Ryoko said salmon has to be served as fresh as possible, and I ate all wasabi. Oh man, that shit is hotter than serrano peppers. But don't worry, we have a lot of more fish in the jacuzzi." Right, it comes handy to have more than one bathtub in the luxury apartment.

Finally Amado sends away his bratty little brother. Then it's just the two of you. 

"I've got something for you." You remember to smile, which seems to work fine as Amado approaches. "All done?" He asks, you haven't figured it out what he's asking about, the dishes? Yes. Then the Mexican lowers your ponytail, running his fingers through your hair. 

"You don't wanna hair in your grilled pacific saury." You joke, bringing him another set of hot meal you specifically make for him.

"Tell me more about it." Amado takes a large bite, looking satisfied and more relaxed.

You two are chatting over some mezcal and a plate of edamame afterwards. Amado asks about your day, and trades some anecdotes about Vicente when you tentatively ask about his. The fucker is smart and vigilant. 

"I have to tell you something," Okay, you get his full attention, "The bluefin tuna you ate three days ago wasn't served in the best condition. Pacho wanted a show, everything grand and pretty, so I had to cut the red part of the fish and make a bright-colored akami plate right away. It's meaty and chewy, which should have been aged for three days in the fridge to allow the texture to soften and release more flavor," You opens the fridge, showing Amado several chunks of tuna you already cut out, "You can have friends over in three days, I bought enough for a full table."

"What about the pink ones?" He seems genuinely interested. You continue to explain that different parts of tuna offer variable tastes from super fatty pink otoro around the head and collar to chutoro, mixture of fat and meat from the back and belly.

To your surprise, Amado asks for a slice of the fat part, "You said it's the most expensive one. I shouldn't waste your hard-earned money, right?" Both of you laugh.

You take a really fat cut. When you're looking for a plate and the soy sauce, Amado just eats it from your hand. Your fingers are freezing from the tuna and when he swallows them with the slice, the hot and soft sensation around fucking turns you on like nothing else. The sashimi-hater even licks your fingers a few more times, "to clean the fat."

As he claimed, "It's better."

"Now you're gonna show me how you destroy my jacuzzi on day one."

You feel great sitting by the edge of the jacuzzi a.k.a. your temporary fish tank and checking out all the aquatic animals you bought earlier.

"It could've been us in it." What a tease. You laugh then get up, "I don't think it's a good idea to get naked with lobsters and octopuses." 

"Wait," Amado turns you around, still sitting by the edge, "Let me make it up for you."

When Amado decides to give you a head, you simply don't say no. It's like sitting on his face because you can barely stand still. He notices then pulls you closer. The lips used to wrap around your fingers now make you feel like in heaven, and God bless his fucking tongue. The Mexican is driving you mad.

"Shh, you wake up the octopus." You're at the tipping point and the fucker pauses. You open your eyes, an octopus is on the move, two tentacles approaching the edge of the jacuzzi, sucker rings very close to your bare legs.

Then imagine Amado gets up and pushes you up against the tiles in the shower, silencing you with a rough kiss. You taste yourself, and something raw, could be the tuna or the cigarettes he smokes. You get even more aroused by that. 

You're desperate for more of his touch. So you grab his big hand and put it between your thighs, and he's willing to comply. 

This is too much. You cum just after a few rubs against him.  

"I'm sorry for the other night. You're a genius." Amado's playing dirty, sweet-talking while he continues to rub against your oversensitive part, "Would you do me favor? I'm thinking about hosting a few guests, somewhere private, the tuna will be ready by Friday, right?"

You can't believe he falls for the trick. This could be an important business meeting and you're gonna be there.

"Sure. Can I ask something in return?" You already come to your senses while giving Amado a painfully slow handjob.

"Anything you want. Flowers? Jewelry? Cars? I have some better collections than Pacho's Corvette C4. Too flashy." Amado offers generously.

You can't help laughing, "Gosh, how could men make everything a dick comparison contest?"

"You saw his dick?" Amado bites your lower lips. He's rock hard, throbbing.

"I thought you did, too. You two seem very close. I mean, Pacho is a gorgeous man." You keep going, and teasing. You enjoy the fact that you just plant something really dirty in Amado's head. You bet he's having an imaginary threesome with you and Pacho. Not a bad idea though.

By the time you make him come, the Mexican almost forgets what you're asking.

"I ask 'Do you have some dumbbells?' I need my daily training and I don't have time to find a new gym here. What? How do you think I'm able to handle a 150lbs tuna in a line of work mostly for men?" You give Amado a little squeeze before licking it off.

You have a dream that night, being penetrated by Amado in some warm water while a giant octopus sucks you off. You wake up with wetness down there.

You visit several Japanese restaurants in town, unsurprisingly boring. You get the idea that local middle-class see Japanese cuisine as an exotic and cultural novelty. 

You even invite Amado to have lunch at one of those restaurants during his break. He frowns at the food after the first bite, "You can't do this to me."

What? "Asking me to eat this crap is inhumane. I'm spoiled." Amado makes it sound like you're the bad guy, but these smiling eyes give him away. He looks at you the way that makes you feel wanted.

You two end up eating cheap Mexican street food and that's where you find some early blossoms of jacarandas with excitement.

"You want those?" Amado asks, picking up some dried petals from the street. All you can think of is jacarandas flower could be an interesting alternative to sakura, which adds a domestic touch to the food you're gonna prepare for Friday. 

"Yes, please." Amado must find it weird but he just nods.

Once being brought to the outskirt location of the private meeting, you spend more time making rearrangement of the decor, trying to create an authentic Japanese ryotei experience. 

You call Amado once for extra resources. It's tricky because you don't know if you're in a position to ask anything when he's away, busy.

"I'm glad you called. I may not be an Asian culture fanatic like Pacho but I promise you will have anything you want. Whatever rare shit he's bought you, just name it. I'll have an entire Boeing 727 team ready to fly it in from every fucking corner of the world." Yeah, the dick measuring thing is still going on. 

What you don't mention is that you're also glad to hear his voice. "Will you come over?" You almost let it slip, "I mean, to see if you like everything."

"No. I trust you," Amado pauses, "I'll be an hour early."

"Mind the traffic." Bright laughter breaks from the other end of the line.

And thanks to the highly efficient Carrillo Air Express, stuff you request is brought to you the next day including a whole box of violet jacarandas petals.

You ask for a guest list before starting to set the table. "Just set tables for eight people." Vicente clearly has no idea of being a host. You explain that it's part of your job to make sure no one is allergic to seafood. "How the fuck do I know that?" The young man is still complaining.

"Don't worry. Give me a list. I'll look for their office numbers, call their secretaries and find out."

Vicente is easily convinced. You get what you want, a list of high-up politicians and business executives. Not sure how this is relevant but you memorize the names and companies anyway.

Amado makes his arrival almost cinematic. With a chopper still swirling outside, the man in black steps out from the driving seat on the right and waves to you like a king. 

"You're early." You can hide your smile this time.

"Because someone suggested I should 'mind the traffic.' It happens I've owned a few choppers." The fucker looks like a dashing pilot out Hollywood movies. 

You joke that he's nothing like what Pacho used to say, "Low-profile my ass." 

"Oh, Pacho talks about me?"

"Stop. I'm really not interested in which one of you has a bigger dick."

Later Amado hands you a wrapped frame. "I heard you're looking for some Japanese art for decoration. I don't know anything about art but..."

You can't believe he brings you a shunga, tradition Japanese erotic painting, depicting a giant octopus performing oral on a woman with pink tentacles all over her naked body. "You're ridiculous." You frown, it's too explicit you're not sure if it's appropriate for such an occasion.

"I saw something similar at Pacho's house. Well, minus the woman. Just boys." The cheeky bastard winks at you, "You're also serving octopus sashimi tonight? It's a fit then." That's how a print of the famous Octopus and Girl Diver ends up in the main room.

Dinner starts at 8 and everything is ready. You're asked to briefly introduce each dish to the guests when one's presented. Guests praise everything from the chopstick rest made of porcelain with traditional Mexican patterns, to the floral-shaped bream sashimi slices. The tuna sushi is a hit, everyone loves it. You give Amado a knowing smirk when you catch him taking a few himself. The octopus sashimi is a bit tricky but the guests are so "polite", they still pretend to enjoy the exotic food. 

The rest of the time you stay outside the room. You hear things but not in a coherent manner. Amado mentions NAFTA, export-oriented furniture and auto parts factories in Juárez, and two of them are head of the biggest tequila exporters of the country. Nothing makes sense for the drug business. Is the most successful Mexican drug trafficker gonna shift to other legitimate businesses? That might have an impact on Pacho's business.

When dessert is brought to the table, everyone wows — the improvised jacarandas mochi with dried petals is a nice surprise to end the dinner. You tell them the story that instead of the much-anticipated sakura which wasn't well-adjusted to the Mexican weather, how jacarandas was introduced to Mexico City by a Japanese gardener in the 1930s. All the guests finish their plates while giving you a few nods.

Amado seems very pleased with everything you've done. He lowers his voice to ask you to wait for him afterwards.

"Where are we going?" You ask through the headphones. Seems Amado is flying you back to downtown DF.

The Mexican smirks, "To the sky."

You finally land atop the roof of a skyscraper, "This is the tallest building in Mexico." Amado holds you tight when you exit the chopper. The wind at night in early January is insane, let alone you're 700ft above the ground.

It must be some five-star hotel but turns out it's an office building of Pemex, Mexico's state-owned oil company. WTAF? "Put it this way, the biggest exporters of the country hang out sometimes." Amado's sense of humor is something you didn't expect, "Well, I'm not saying they bring as many unattached US dollars as I do, not even close."

When you let the fact sink in — that the Juárez cartel probably earns twice as much as the biggest oil company in the country through exporting "goods," having access to a secret suite on the top floor of the Pemex Tower is not surprising at all.

"You bring people here often?" You ask when Amado pops a bottle of wine. The city view from the 54th floor is stunning.

"I didn't know you're the jealous type." He brings you a glass. You two stand in front the giant window, raising your glasses like you're celebrating. 

"You haven't asked what we're celebrating." Amado takes a step closer.

You put index finger on his lips, which are incredibly soft. Immediately remind you last time you kissed, "I don't want to get myself killed in a foreign country."

"Did Pacho teach you that? Not asking questions, just do your thing." Amado starts kissing your hand.

"Oh, my God. You're so obsessed with him, and it's kinda cute."

"Nonsense." The Mexican disagrees, and turns to the window. 

You sets both of your glasses aside, then leads Amado to the bed. You get undressed first, lying on the bed, waiting.

"You're sure this is something you want?" You ask, completely stripped. Amado stares at your flat-chested body like the first time he found out who you are. 

"You make it sound like I haven't sleep with supermodels. That funny?" The fucker tickles you, "You have no idea..."

Imagine Amado makes you feel adored, marking every inch of your body with his big hands and soft lips. He takes time, mapping your body till he finds the most sensitive spots and makes you moan, shivering.

"Let me warm you up." Amado probably thinks you're cold, so he spoons you. The long limbs of his are like tentacles wrapped around you, fuck, you can feel his erection grinding against you.

You're so wet for Amado. When he finally pushes in from behind, neither of you can resist the sensation.

"Wanted to do this to you the whole week. You're such a fucking tease, aren't you? Dropped at my door in that kimono robe then left without letting me even touch you." Amado pounds into you, with hand reaching your little bean from behind, making you a total mess.

 "Why didn't you make me stay then?" You're nearly breathless, "Is it...because it's within Pacho's territory?" You obviously cross some line with that. The thrusts become harder, feels like Amado is gonna fuck you senseless.

You're not sure if Pacho wants to know you are talking about him when you reach orgasm. 

You decide to leave it out before you pass out.

[so-langdon]

In The End - Michael Langdon x Fem! Reader

Summary: Michael has to end things with Y/N in order to protect her.

A/N: I got my wisdom teeth out on Wednesday so I’ve been very out of it, hazy and tired while recovering. I still wanted to post something like I do every Friday so I wrote this! Sorry if it seems off or loopy or has mistakes 🙃

Warnings: Angst, mean! Michael, sadness, swearing, shorter than my other writings, loopy writing probably smh

The words, “I never want to lose you,” replay in Y/N’s head repeatedly. The soft tone of Michael’s voice and the huskiness to his words, yet so utterly sweet. It sent a shiver through her when he whispered it to her, cuddling up to her body as he brought her closer into him as he laid beside her in his bed. 

The imagery of the memory was still fresh and clear in her mind. She’d pushed her fingers through his short blond locks, smiling and leaning over to kiss him. “You never have to,” she had whispered back to him. 

But now, just days later, it was ending. 

The words Michael just spoke blindsided her. She had known something was bothering him, she could see it in his eyes. He was more quiet, faked a lot of smiles, and had been less affectionate all day. She wanted to ask Michael what was bothering him, but figured asking when they got home from being out would be better. She’d hope Michael would open up and tell her what was wrong. But when he had, she never expected it to be this.

The silence in the room was deafening as Y/N sat on Michael’s bed, trying to conjure up any response. But she was so confused, so shocked and hurt, she couldn’t find her voice to reply. 

“Did you hear me,” Michael says, grabbing Y/N’s attention away from her racing mind. She looks over at him as he stands at the foot of his bed, looking at her impassively.  Of course she’d heard him. They’d just gotten home from going out to lunch. Y/N had sat down on Michael’s bed, asking what he wanted to do for the rest of the evening, gradually wanting to transition to asking what was bothering Michael. But he was bringing it up all on his own, the words, “I don’t want to be with you anymore,” leaving Michael’s mouth. It caught her off guard; she wasn’t sure what he had actually said. But once they had processed, she turned her head away, a series of thoughts racing through her head while her heart began stirring in a negative way. That’s when the memory of Michael telling her he never wanted to lose just a few days ago were replaying in her head at that moment as she tried to connect everything together. None of it made sense. “Y/N,” Michael says. Y/N stares at him. “Yes, I heard you,” she says calmly. Michael turns his head away, crossing his arms.  “I don’t.. I don’t understand what’s happening,” Y/N admits. She pushes a hand through her hair, exasperated. She shakes her head. “This came out of nowhere,” she states.  “I know,” Michael replies, looking at her. “You know?” She raises her eyes. “Then, can you explain to me? What is going through your mind? Where did this come from?” “I don’t want you anymore,” Michael half-shrugs, the words flowing carelessly out of his mouth. She sucks in a breath, chuckling a bit humorlessly. “Just like that?” She shakes her head. “With no reason? Just changed your mind?” “Shit happens,” Michael says monotone.  “No,” Y/N stands up. “Shit does not just happen, not like this. Not with us,” she gestures. “What’s going on?” She asks, narrowing her eyes.  “Don’t make this any harder than it needs to me,” Michael says to her.  “I deserve an explanation at the very least, don’t I?” Y/N asks, crossing her arms now.  “I.. don’t want to talk about it,” Michael looks down. “Oh, you don’t want to talk about it? Is this inconveniencing you?” She glares. “If you’re going to end this, then you explain yourself first. You owe me that much, Michael,” Y/N states, voice raising lightly. Michael sighs, looking over at her.  “Do you understand why I’m so confused and caught off guard?”  Michael doesn’t say anything. “Just the other day you were telling me how much you loved me. How you always wanted to be with me, that you never wanted to lose me,” she shakes her head lightly in confusion. “Now it’s done?” She narrows her eyes. “You don’t want me anymore?” Michael sighs.  “Were you lying?” Y/N asks, trying to hold herself together to not show herself breaking down.  “Y/N,” Michael shuts his eyes. “That’s the only explanation I can think of,” she says, taking a few steps towards him. “There’s no way you could lose those types of feelings for someone, not that fast. Not if they were real.” Opening his eyes, he looks at Y/N hard. “Don’t make this a big deal.” Y/N stares at him for a long moment. “Don’t make this a big deal,” she raises her eyes. “Don’t make this a big deal,” she repeats again, glaring after. “What do you want me to do? Do you want me to just skip out of here, say ‘kay,’ and forget about it?” Michael pushes a hand through his golden blond locks, turning around.  “I need answers, Michael. I need you to tell me what’s going on. None of this makes sense,” Y/N states, eyes watering for a moment. She wipes them away quickly, trying not to show this vulnerable side of herself to Michael in this moment.  “Y/N, please,” Michael turns around to her again. “’Y/N, please,’ ‘Y/N just,’ ‘Y/N this’! Can’t you fucking say anything else but my name?” Y/N snaps.  “Fuck, you want me to tell you the truth?” He glares, stepping to her. “Be honest and explain what happened?” “It would be start,” Y/N crosses her arms. “Fine, I never fucking loved you,” Michael exclaims  Y/N’s body visibly shrinks back, shoulders slumping, eyes diverting to anywhere but his face.  “I never cared about you, alright? I just, I saw you, thought you were hot, wanted to fuck, that was it.” Y/N looks at him, biting on her lip.  “All that bullshit I told you about loving you, yeah, it was a lie, you’re right, okay?” He laughs out coldly. “I told you what any guy tells a girl to get in bed with them. I kept you around because you were a good fuck and knew I could fuck you whenever I wanted,” he rolls his eyes. “But you’re getting too attached, clearly,” Michael gestures, “so it’s time to end things.” Y/N stands, body trembling in place as she listens to Michael’s harsh words. Her face is elusive, trying to hide the evident pain Michael is bringing her.  “You were nothing more than just a good fuck to pass the time,” Michael tells her. “That’s it. Now get out,” Michael adds, walking to his door and opening it up for her to leave.  Y/N blinks, feeling a stabbing pang in her chest. This couldn’t actually be happening? Were these words actually leaving Michael’s mouth? Michael seemed to never have a mean bone in his body, not towards her at least. He had only ever been sweet and warm-hearted and gentle with her. From the very beginning. So he couldn’t be serious now; he was not seriously this cruel.  She walks quietly over to him and his door. But stops in front of him, looking up at his face.  He stares at her with a bored expression, seeming impatient. But his eyes give him away. She sees there’s something else there. A sadness, a guilt. He’s upset, she knows he is. She didn’t just spend the last year of her life with him and not learn how he works. She narrows her eyes. “You’re lying,” Y/N whispers. She clears his throat, “You’re lying. You’re not telling me the truth,” she turns more to him. Michael rolls his eyes, looking away and placing a hand on the door in annoyance.  “I know you, I know how you work,” she starts, trying to keep her voice strong. “And you’re not telling the truth. I can tell you’re lying, I know you are,” Y/N says, voice betraying her and wavering. “There’s no way you would have wasted a year just so you could,” she pauses. “Just to get --” “I told you what you wanted to hear so I could fuck you,” he states harshly. “I got what I wanted, and yeah, I kept you around because you were easy then. Now I’m bored of it and you. That’s all there is to it.” His words hurt her, but she shakes her head, knowing he has to be lying. “You’re upset. Your eyes, your voice, you’re not ev--” “You don’t fucking know me,” Michael glares at her, snapping at her. “You fell for the first guy that gave you attention and got fucked over. Shit happens,” he repeats from earlier.  “There’s no way any of this is true,” she shakes her head. “You were genuine, so sweet.. What we have is real.” “Had,” Michael corrects. “And, we never really had anything because it was never actually real.” “Bullshit,” Y/N states. “You don’t spill your heart over someone to that person and cry about loving them when you don’t actually have feelings for them. You bared your heart and soul to me, continuously,” she pleads. “It’s one of the reason’s why I love you.” Michael laughs a bit. “You’re a fucking idiot.” Y/N raises her eyes, taken aback by Michael’s reaction. She takes a step away from him, feeling like his words are actually hitting her in the chest, slapping her across the face, are pulling her down to be nothing. She doesn’t want to talk to him anymore now, not after the way he's treated her in the last few minutes. But she can’t help with looking back at him with some hope. His guilt-ridden face is more prominent, more sorrowful. She narrows her eyes, shaking her head. She hesitates but steps back to him, grabbing his face, looking up into his piercing blue eyes, trying to find any sense in them. “Tell me what’s going on. Tell me what’s happened?” Michael looks back at her with despair, eyes almost speaking back to her, almost telling her the real truth. But he swallows, composes himself and keeps a harsh look on his face. He grabs her wrists, pulling her hands from him. He leans in a bit. “I'll fucking ruin you,” he seethes. Y/N’s eyes water, his cold tone sending a shiver through her body. She shakes her head, “This isn’t you.” “You really are pathetic, aren’t you,” Michael laughs a bit humorlessly. “If I knew you were going to be this clingy, I would have wasted my time with someone else. I don’t know how else to tell you that I don’t fucking want you, I never did. Just get the fuck out, okay?” Michael snaps and pushes her outside the door before slamming it in her face. Y/N steps back, startled by the slam and blinks. Tears suddenly fall from her eyes, her breathing beginning to hyperventilate. Michael’s behavior was so unlike him, so cold, so different, she can’t believe the way he’s just acted towards her. She knew there was something else going on, a different reason why Michael was causing all this.  But from his harsh tones and actions, maybe not, after all. 

Michael leans the side of his head against the door, listening to Y/N. He can hear her breathing getting heavier, more shallow, and he knows she’s crying from the way she sniffs and sighs out. He listens until he hears the soft patter of her foot steps walking, fading away in the distance until ultimately hearing the shut of the front door. 

Michael closes his eyes, breathing out with restraint, moving to lean his back against the door. He leans his head back, bringing his hands to his eyes, shaking his head, mumbling out a string of words until he screams out, “Fuck!”

Michael had gotten into some trouble recently, having been arrested for the murder of a butcher at the market when out with his caretaker, Miriam Mead. Some fucked up shit happened during the interrogation, and a supposed Warlock, Ariel, had come to get him to take him to Hawthorne’s school, a school for Warlocks, so he could gain control of his abilities and expand. The thing was, he was very aware of his abilities. He’d had this plan formed with Mead already to get the attention of the warlocks at the warlock school. This was just a beginning step in wanting to get the attention of Cordelia Fox, the Supreme witch of Robichaux's school for witches. If everything played out right, he would be able to overtake the witches, and begin his scheme of ending the world.

The only thing that wasn’t apart of his plan was Y/N. 

He never expected to meet her in the first place, let alone fall in love with her for that matter. Michael didn’t realize how dangerous it could be for Y/N to get involved, so he ignored it until it was impossible to ignore anymore. Michael didn’t want her to get hurt, to be put at risk or to live a life surrounded by all this far-fetched type of stuff. The plans he had weren’t suitable for someone you love. He knew the only way to keep Y/N safe was to end things with her. And so this is what had to be done, though it was the hardest thing he would ever have to do. 

He didn’t know that he’d eventually cross paths with her again. He hadn’t even come close to difficulty yet since he was unaware of the fact that he would see her again and would have to work overtime to gain her forgiveness and trust once the world had actually ended at his hand. But to him, it already seemed like the world had ended for him.

~~~

A/N: Can you tell I’m loopy from the writing lol. Hopefully this wasn’t too bad 😩 I’ll go back and edit and try and make it better once I’ve recovered! Just really wanted to get something out in the mean time <3

Thank you for any and all feedback! :))

[milkandhoneyoongi]

lost gestures (namjoon scenario)

request: Heeey I was wondering if you could some super angst with Namjoon, he took all his stress on reader calling her clingy pointing out some things she do but "dislikes" (like using hes clothes, texting him all day and such) So she stop doing it ANGSTYYY I love your angst

a/n: well i love writing angst so here we gooooo also im so here for NAM FUCKING JOOOOOOONNNN

you can always send me a request here and view my old scenarios here

genre: angsty and then fluffy

word count: 1,068 words

warnings: yelling mention, namjoon being unappreciative smh,

       Namjoon’s job was hard on him.  You knew as much.  As the leader of his group he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders and more often than not you were the one that was there to massage out the kinks after a long day.  

Most nights he was so relieved to be home that he just melted in your embrace, loving the warmth you could offer him, the support.  

Tonight, however, was not one of those nights.

“How was your day, love?” You mumbled from across the counter.  You could see in his face that he was exhausted past the point of being mush and instead frozen over.  “You didn’t answer any of my texts.”

“Yeah when you send three thousand of them it’s hard to get to each one,” he spat and you winced.  

“I just worry about you,” you shrugged, feeling insecure that he didn’t appreciate your efforts to make sure he was okay.

“You don’t have to, Y/N,” he raised his voice at you, tone wavering at the volume.  

You felt tears brim the corner of your eyes as you yelled back, “Maybe I want to!”

“Maybe I don’t want you to!  Maybe sometimes I just want space.”  You subconsciously pulled on the sleeves of the sweatshirt you donned, bringing them to your face to wipe the tears that fell down your cheeks.  You winced as you realized it was Namjoon’s sweatshirt.  “Speaking of space I would love if every once in a while you wore your own clothes.  I don’t really understand why you take mine literally all the time.”

You wanted to tell him it was because he wasn’t home as often as you’d like him to be and the fabric that smelled like him and was heavy around you reminded you of what it was like when he was home.  You wanted to tell him that his clothes felt like home because they felt like him.  Instead you gulped and nodded, not wanting him to get any angrier.  You knew that if you tried to explain these things to him he would just call you annoying, so you didn’t.  “No I’ll consider your feelings next time,” you confirmed.  You wanted your voice to be strong but you just sounded sad, and maybe part of you expected him to hold back on his verbal attack at the realization that his words had hurt you, but you were wrong.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t realize it bothered you that much.”

You stuck to your word, holding back on all the things you once did.  It had been weeks since you stopped by his studio to bring him food, weeks since you sent him quick texts to let him know you were thinking of him, weeks since you had allowed yourself to feel the comfort of his oversized clothing.  You missed it, sure.  You missed being close with him.

But if he didn’t even appreciate it, why waste the effort?

Namjoon had regretted his words after sleeping on them.  He woke up with you already having left for work and for a moment thought of how he’d probably see a little note from you in the kitchen, but there was nothing.  He had pushed you away and he knew it.  Part of him, though, wanted to see how long you could keep it up.  Almost testing you.

The test for you, though, was torture for him.  Sure, his phone rang less, but he smiled less too.  Sure, his work was seldom interrupted, but he was often bored.  Sure, he had more clothes in his closet but his heart felt empty.  

Allowing you, no, forcing you, to give him space was one of the biggest mistakes he had ever made, and he didn’t know how to bring you close again.  He missed you.

So he tried to make it up to you.  He tried to pull you back in.

From Namjoon: Want to come grab lunch with me?

You smiled.  He wanted to see you during the day?  This was new.  You looked at the clock, however and sighed.  You only had a half hour lunch break and his studio was across town.

To Namjoon: You know your building is halfway across the city, right?

He actually didn’t.  He knew where you worked but he never realized that you were trekking across the city to bring him food when you were worried about his well being.  His heart shattered as he recognized that all that you did for him was really just your way of showing him you loved him, and he had asked you to stop.  

So for once he decided to make the trek, now worried about you.  He feared that after these weeks of being unable to express your love for him in your own special way, you wouldn’t know how to feel that deeply for him anymore.  Maybe you had forgotten what it was like to love him.  He took a cab across the city to show up at your building, praying he wasn’t too late to get you back.  

“Joon?” You frowned in confusion as he stepped into your office, a sorry smile on his face.  

“Jagi…” he sighed.  “I miss you.”  You cocked a brow.  “I can’t believe I ever asked you to stop doing everything you did for me.  I was being an idiot and I miss everything about you.  I miss your constant text messages and stopping by the studio.  I miss the little notes you would leave in the kitchen when you were gone by the time I woke up.  I miss the feeling of the hug you would give me after a long day… the ones where you would refuse to let go.  I miss pulling on my own clothes and having them smell like you.  I miss you.  I was an asshole for calling you clingy and I was an idiot for thinking I wanted space.  I love you and I want you with me all the time.”

You felt tears coat your eyes again as you rose from your chair, pressing your face to his chest.  “I missed you so much.”

“Please, Y/N, I beg you,” he pulled away, placing his hands firmly on your shoulders and then brought you in for a sweet kiss before stepping back to utter, “Cling on to me for the rest of my life.”

[ask-svt-hearteu]

neighbor! Minghao

https://ask-svt-hearteu.tumblr.com/post/162640470571/masterlistAdmin note: These imagines might become a fanfic series featuring the reader X a member of seventeen if enough people take an interest!

somehow I see a display of nunchucks and a katana his fireplace mantle?

for scientific reasons only cough

somehow it fits into the aesthetics of his house though?

the coat closet houses skateboards and hats, “what else is that closet for?”

has a surprising collection of wine glasses and red a variety of red wines

cabinets have a dark earthy brown color, kind of a vintage countertop, but modern look overall

renovated either a room or the whole basement into a dance studio

goes skateboarding early in the morning

invites people over for lunch often

isn’t really a neighborhood watch kind of guy or welcoming committee person

but your doorbell rings and you open the door and there’s a bouquet of flowers and the sound of a skateboard fleeing the scene

has enough pillows on the couch to drown a man

the one with an intricate stone pathway in their backyard with lots of vines and interesting plants and a bench so he can sit on it and enjoy the beautiful green canopy of his private rain forest

parkours over all the garbage cans on garbage day and never knocks even a single one over

hosts video game nights, like just dance so y'all can dab at the wrong parts, and overwatch, or LOL

the one crazy enough to buy tiki torches because Jun dared him and nearly set Jeonghan’s cat on fire smh

plays jazz in his house, you can hear the sax solo every Tuesday night

goes “camping” in his driveway with Mingyu, Seokmin, and other 97 liners

pranks by the 97 line

ding dong ditches your house only to run by a few minutes later, excessively dabbing

except Seungcheol scolds them

so they apologize to everyone and bakes everyone cake instead

teaches the kids how to dance/ bboy and how to skate

imagine that cute grin on his face while doing so

leads adventures to defeat the Jun dragon for all the gold hidden (chocolate coins)

wears sunglasses indoors

“Minghao it’s 8pm, can you even see out of those?”

“nope”

broken cat doors and fences are magically fixed overnight with a little note saying, “97 line was here, your payment will be one dab”

flips water bottles onto the roof until they get stuck

and needs to borrow a ladder to retrieve them

but not Seungcheol’s oh no

“should we ask Seungcheol hyung…”

Minghao stares while Mingyu excessively shakes his head

yeah they don’t want to go through that time again

now if someone where to peek outside their door,

they’d see three adults wearing all black creeping down the hallway as if they were in a spy movie

until they reach Minghao’s place where the original plan was to play games until the morning and figure it out then

but then they see “suspicious” boxes stacked outside Minghao’s door

except now it wasn’t just out his door

because right across from him the used to be empty place’s door was being held open by those boxes

but they also saw a ladder being slower pushed into the doorway

“HEY MINGHAO! your new neighbor has one!!! go ask them!”

getting prodded forward, he gets a look at you

who was lifting one side of the ladder struggling

bending down, he picks it up

and you knew you didn’t just get super human strength so you glance up

flipping his hair naturally, Minghao puts on an embarrassed smile

“Hey I️ live across from you, welcome to the area!”

“Thank you!” you say brightly, then nod towards his hands hold the ladder,

“and thank you”

“it’s no problem” putting on that embarrassed smile again, he chuckles nervously

“actually, me and my friends would like to use it right now?”

“Oh!” your eyes widen in surprise

you laugh slightly, smiling

“go ahead”

“thanks!”

and with barely any effort at all, he takes the ladder by himself,

flashing you a small smile before maneuvering his way out your doorway and down the hall

you feel a little weak at the knees

and while you excuse it to the amount of lifting you’ve done

you know a small portion is because of your neighbors most adorable smile

and then there’s Minghao,

letting out a little giggle to himself

because damn his neighbor is cute

“what’s that smile for???” Mingyu raises an eyebrow at his different face

“what? nothing” Minghao shrugs casually

squinting at his face, Seokmin claps

“Ah! Were they a she? a pretty she?”

the both wiggle their eyebrows at Minghao

“Aye why do looks matter?”

walking past them carrying the ladder,

almost hitting them, not on purpose at all

he avoids the question well

so it somehow became who could chug the most

*but she was cute’ he thinks, smiling softly to himself

they manage to take hours getting the many many water bottles of the roof

“what a waste of water” Seokmin sighs, balancing a bottle on his arm

this is where you see three crazy guys on the roof fighting for water bottles

“I️ SAW THAT FIRST!”

“well your gonna have to run for it” 

ever seen grown men running carefully and dramatically 

its hilarious 

what should’ve taken 10 minutes turned into a whole two hours 

already night time and sneaking down from the roof

and crowded inside Minghao’s place playing FIFA

“what are you gonna do about the ladder over there” Mingyu calls from the kitchen making snacks of course

“i’ll bring it over tomorrow morning” 

“you should bring her food too! as a welcome!!” Seokmin nudges Minghao wiggling his brows

making him shove back, trying to concentrate on the game

“YES! i’ll start making food!!” Mingyu claps excitedly

‘oh lord, this is going to be a mess’ 

and that’s how he ends up at your door, a basket of food in his hands stacked almost up to his chin

you swing open the door, your breakfast sandwich in hand, still in your PJ’s, hair up into a bun 

“AH” you yelp, swinging the door close on reflex

and then opening it again cringing at the way you look

Minghao glances at the corner of your lips,

where a bread crumb lays

“your neighbor, remember me?” 

“yes the c-” you smile pausing, still flustered, “the guy borrowing the ladder” 

“i see you have it” you laugh slightly motioning to the ladder behind him

“and with a welcome gift” 

and grabbing the basket from him, you walk inside, letting him set the ladder down in your living room

“i would invite you to stay but…” 

he nods, “you just moved in, your busy i get it” 

Minghao smiles backtracking out the door

“i’m right across from you if you need anything” 

closing your door, you lean back against the wall, 

“oh my god i’m a mess” you whisper to yourself 

and smirking, opening the door just down the hall from yours, 

he shakes his head at himself

‘nevermind, i’m a mess,’ 

taking a breathe, and grabbing his skateboard, he laughs

“well, she’s adorable” 

you, are well, going about your moving in process, 

occasionally letting the cute neighbor run though your mind

who, oh my god, you guys don’t even know each other’s names

taking a break from your many boxes, your run to the nearest convenience store to find dinner 

only to find it particularly crowded in the ramyeon section 

your eyes wonder to your neighbor, surprisingly

and your reaction is to blast your way outta there

until you guys make eye contact

making Minghao not very subtly leaving his group

“finding dinner?” he asks, tucking his hand into his pockets 

“just getting some necessities, like instant noodles” 

he chuckles, agreeing

sticking out your hand, “i realized we never introduced ourselves, it’s y/n” 

he shakes your hand, “Minghao” 

“well we’re kind of past the introducing stage aren’t we” he jokes

referring to your appearance this morning, or the ladder, or both 

either way, your cheeks heat up 

it feels sudden to you, but he hands you his phone

“let’s exchange numbers, i can help you with your boxes,” he smirks, “or show you around” 

“oh?” you, catch on to what he might be insinuating 

though your heartbeat makes you want to tell yourself not to read into it

“did you ask her out ye-” Seokmin comes out of no where swinging his arm around Minghao 

who elbows him into his stomach a little too late

nevermind, your definitely reading into it

smiling meaningfully at him,

“i’ll stop bothering you guys then”  you say spinning around

“you-” 

“call me!” you say without turning 

Minghao nods, smiling

“how does it feel to be cut off huh” Seokmin huffs, grinning

“how can you smile like that as if we aren’t here huh” Mingyu teases 

“quit” Minghao glares jokingly 

not stopping the rest of the guys from getting on his case though, 

“so when are we gonna hear the story of how they met” Seungcheol smirks 

“uhhh” 

the three of them say in sync

“gotta blast” 

the three of them take their food as Minghao skates away with the other three running behind him 

you happen to catch a glance at the three whiling checking out 

and laugh, covering your mouth, eyes following them out

‘that’ll be a good conversation for next time’ 

MASTERLIST

[wantinghappiness]

11/25/18 (tw: #s)

ahahaha thanksgiving weekend really got me.

I know I was eating well over 2000 calories on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. today, I bet I ate close to that but not over.

On Thuraday, I was 124.4lbs. On Friday, I weighed myself after lunch and still only weighed 123.5. On Saturday at the end of the day I weighed 125.5. All bad weights considering I weighed 120 a couple weeks ago.

I've sorta let myself go but have been calling it semi-recovery. It's frustrating and I don't like it. I get into this cycle of "it's okay, I'm 17. I'm a teenager I need to live my life like one" and I'll eat what I want with my friends, I'll go out with them no biggie and not care too much about the calories and all the food I'm eating. But then I'll get home and take my clothes off and feel disgusting. Then I'll restrict but then they want to hang out again. And all they want to do is spend money and eat.

My ED is mad at me too, because I used to restrict to under 800 calories (preferred under 500), but now I restrict to under 1000-1200 calories. It's still a very small amount of calories but I don't think it's small enough. MyFitnessPal says I'll lose about a pound a week but I'm like ehhh I want more.

I wish I could do low restriction again, but I keep making excuses. I have to eat something with a coffee in the morning or else I fall asleep in class. If I don't have a snack in 5th period I get too hungry. If I don't eat lunch I get tired in my last classes. If I don't eat a snack after school I can't do my homework. I have to eat dinner bc my mom pays attention to that. On and on and on.

but now that I think about it, I might be able to get away with a couple things. maybe I just don't eat my lunch and I save that for my after school snack? that's an easy 100-200 calories avoided right there. or maybe, since I usually bring two things in my lunch, I eat the easy one during 5th period, and the other one as my after school snack. I can even skip 5th period snack altogether! I'm usually the first one to the classroom, which is why I can eat there without panicking. But if I go to the bathroom during passing period, other people will be there and I won't be able to eat. that might work.

ugh. this is highkey disordered but fuck it.

I'll lose as much as I can before Christmas and over winter break. Depending on those results I'll try to lose more during January. If I'm satisfied, I might try to see what will happen if I eat normally for the new year. I'll make 2000 calorie meal plans and see what my weight does.

anyway, I'm sick of trying to make friends at my new school. everybody here sucks anyway. the one friend I thought I would really like is a selfish bitch. she was supposed to drive home this one girl we were hanging out with and she bailed on her just because she went ahead of us and opened the door for us while we were throwing things away. she claimed that we didn't wait for her after all she's done for us. we were literally right next to her still. the other girl was just being nice. she's manipulative. also I've driven her EVERYWHERE. the amount of gas I waste on her. and she wants me to pay for every meal because she says she'll eventually buy my food, but never does! and she's the one that actually has a job!!!!! and I try to talk to her and she never listens. never. she'll tell me the same story twice In a day bc she forgot she told me, but then will interrupt my stories because she just wants to bring the conversation back to her. she also treats me like I'm stupid and weak and an idiot bc I'm not as outgoing as her, but I actually do my homework and have decent grades in all my classes. she also tries to bash liberals for being stupid but I ask what makes them stupid and she can't come up with anything that makes sense or is correct? she says she's a republican and just knows democrats are stupid bc her dad says so. but she won't let me explain any political stuff to her either, like okay go off ig. not like I had to do research projects last year on all the issues you know nothing about or anything. SMH.

huge rant but I needed it.