#this is what i actually did for 413 btw

[timeausterrors]

let's all enjoy a delicious meal together!!!

[macklives]

homestuck recap

i hated this so fucking much bc my 2 am bitch-ass didnt want to read a recap thats probably longer than any slowburn out there

anyways here it is

also, uhhH sorry im using this as a end of session discussion bc that shit gets explained in her as well. and im not writing up more recaps of a recap so this is where im done for the day. (by done for the day i mean last nights session, im still doing a liveblog soon. i just wrote this yesterday)

also that this is long

you dont have to read it, theres nothing of importance

ive been coping with humor to get me through it

neato.

have fun with what i suffered through:

why was “beta” the only thing unhighlighted?

like did i miss a page???

OH its the beta version of HS thats why

damn its like 5 pages and thats it

mmh

well youll all be happy to know im clicking every single one of these links again bc i like looking back like ahh i remember that. good times. also in case i forgot some shit existed.

do you think andrew had fun writing this? or was he like “fuck”

thats a lot of fucking package talk. good thing im not confused as of now and remember it pretty clearly. of else, this early on in the recap, id be screwed.

god remember when i did an analysis on each item and what it did

i feel as if i have the technology engrained inside my head right now

cruxite, alchemeter, all that jazz

flashbacks are starting up already

yeah, that was the good part in homestuck where i knew 100% that i probably would continue on this liveblog in its entirety, ngl

that one explosion scene. bc it kept me going.

OH W A IT SHIT

i just realized how the intermission spades probably fucking foreshadowed the whole jack revolts thing and gains the ring, which was also technically JOHNS fault considering he slashed up the doll in the first place

my god, i guess thats the only good aspect of the recap. looking back at things and realizing the missing pieces.

oh that makes sense for the whole “this prototyping had no effect on the enemies, since he was already in the medium” i didnt actually think about that

little did rose know where that would get her right now

oh yeah

there��s still the whole entire lab terminal thing and how mom basically knows the place exists. i guess we’re still venturing onto that and itll come up later when we find out how mom knows SO MUCH about the game.

still think shes some weird spy or secret agent

i kinda love her ngl

anyways, theres literally no reason for skaia to produce a cloning machine. so technically, they only sent the meteors in, right? so who put the cloning machine in if not mom?

oh yeah that impact was nerve wrecking asf

and still at this point in the comic i called dave fuckboy red

huh, how times change

i hated reading that whole paragraph ngl, the frustration just kicked me in the boobs again

yeah nobody else got tornadoes, huh?

OH that makes also much more sense

bc she did prototyped them before she entered the medium.

i gotcha

man one of my favorite edits i made, rose hitting that meteor with a bat

are you

telling me

the exiles structures they arrived on were in the form of the items the kids used to enter the medium?

THE EGG

THAT EXPLAINS “EGG”

of course it was 413 years ago. that was never explained. simply vague “many years in the future....” but i expected no less from this

man serenity is the most wholesome character in hs no doubt

damn thought andy here was really gonna spoil us jade’s planet

okay cool, im glad i now have the layout to the whole “their stations went to the coordinates of the home button” shindig

man i honestly dont know what else to say besides “yeah cool recap” when i already pretty much know what went down? ofc im looking into each link and shit and adding in things when i see fit, but otherwise its just me going “ah good times” yknow

the whole meteor thing kinda makes sense now?

we’re still missing a few pieces of info but we’re getting there, folks

oh yeah that reveal

god jade and dave have it in the shits for parents huh

bro isnt the best and jade has a fucking dog

who lowkey

is doing better than bro

who knew a fucking dog is a better guardian than bro lmfao

dreambot = terminator. im telling you.

sorry im still on that idea and it will never leave unless i have the actual proof in front of me that its not going to become a thing. meaning, ive finished hs and theres still no terminator dreambot or either andrew himself gives me a canon letter with “the robot is not arnold, mackenzie, pls just let it be”

why is the entire game session highlighted

i swear to god if this is like to a second recap or smth of the whole game session i may fucking CRY

okay thank god its just a design of the skaia layout

which is honestly cool

idk why its blurry tho but i can at least see the layout now. which is honestly how i pictured it anyways.

yeah, john did make a huge impact in his friends’ life and i find that so fucking touching

yep. got that. everything loops around. cool.

especially when the trolls come in. god we havent even gotten to that recap portion yet, we havent even gotten to the INTERMISSION

pls can this be the halfway point to the recap

AT LEAST

so they were exiled after the whole jack: ascend thing, right? considering theyre way in the future. man no fucking wonder.

speaking of jack

man that whole dad and jack interaction was gold, ngl

OH THAT EXPLAINS THE RING THEN

and wow, andrew’s really giving us the best female content huh. andrew is the true god of equality and diversity.

also hey, i didnt realize that wow. so PM tricked the queen in showing the parking ticket to be able to take the present from jack. she’s a smart cookie, that one..

she and PM basically snitched on jack and it was the best thing that has happened to me so far

oh yeah okay

but why did AR panic over bec? bc thats something we havent learned yet, right?

anyways

exile town, the only town which should exist. facts. i dont make the rules.

noice

i love PM being queen. like.. thats canon now. shes an actual queen.

yeah that was a fun game and the consorts were cute

fuck yeah the dick head

hate them even more now that i know john was killed because of them

anyways, i wonder what dick move dave’s denizen did? maybe thats why its filled with lava bc the denizen was like “fuck it. make the land red. kill them all”

UH WHAT

WHAT

OH MY GOD HOW DID I JUST FORGET NANNAS LETTER LIKE THAT LMFAO

THEIR TITLES WERE THERE THE WHOLE TIME!

so i still dont know what they mean but i can gather it has something to do with the game giving them abilities. considering dave is the “knight of time” and he can go back in time. whack.

which means john can either control someones breathing or simply wind. and rose is... like that one girl in the winx club who does the sun shit. bc whenever i think of light powers, i think of stella.

and jade is space. witch of space.

nice

i have no idea what that means ngl

okay finally

we’re at the trolls

maybe this recap will end soon

i remember when i thought they were internet bullies

yesss

someone asked if i basically knew the trolls were on a different veil than the kids, so not presently with them, and i know lol. i was making a joke before btw. jsyk. dont think im incompetent to forget these things when sometimes i choose to forget it so i can add in a joke

it be like that, i annoy many

then again, pls dont assume im trying to say im not incompetent bc im also a fucking dumbass and DO forget shit and i have no excuse

imagine being so bored on the meteor, your last resort is speaking to aliens

ngl me if i was ever trapped on a meteor and could potentially do that

nah ik its bc its their only hope at helping with their session or whatever tf CG said to john. but there was BOUND to be a conference meeting between them like “okay guys. humans. that needs to be sorted out” and you just hear CG screaming in the background

i cant wait to meet them honestly bc im growing on all 4 of the ones we’ve seen already. and on top of that, i know what they look like and i know theyre not THAT bad, just a little on the crayy zee side sometimes

but theyre trying

OH MY GOD

I GET IT

FUCK

DOES THAT MEAN THE INTERMISSION IS *APART* OF THE MAIN FUCKING STORY??

AND SPADES IS WV FOR THE TROLLS

GOD D A M N

wow

i didnt expect that. but maybe the signs were there and i was just willingly choosing to ignore it or smth bc “haha couldnt be, right”

flashbacks to how i thought the trolls were humans

anyways, i guess he got his revenge on the kids version of “snowman” ie the black queen. but really

he did not have to do that. he could have cut off the finger and fled. but he decided “nah, lets implode her” so the loml is dead and all i got was a catchy song

i knew they were different types of “bullies” but now i just have to replace bullies with uhh

trolling strategies

anyways, this is cute. i love how they’ve come to be friends through mutual frustration. good part in the comic.

i wonder why it explodes

more importantly

....

terminator time?

this was my favourite sequences of dialogues in the whole entirety of homestuck. that is to say the back and forth thing that the kids went through to become a sort of wingman for the other.

absolutely gold.

all except AT’s rap.

GC was the only smart one with the linear shit

anyways fuck he still has to kill the denizen now but apparently its hard to beat for a sleeping dick head so

that will be fun for the future

john will probably need to kill A LOT of imps to get there

yeah rose is a badass bc she slayed that thing with needles of all things

OH and the white queen was the cursive

damn did AR ever do the whole guide process to a kid yet? maybe he will with dave, idk

oHHH

i fucking SEE

thats why he said DNA

to use it and replace all the life forms in the ocean

fucking neat wow

man that sounded sarcastic but im genuinely impressed bc all i got was bullshit as i read jaspersprites log

so thats the secret. it was “meow” bc that somehow translates to the genetic code she needs then. and that code apparently took fucking years to write as well. sick. whack. oh man.

derse is very pretty, ngl

and wow shit

“dave had already been awake in his tower all along without realizing it” how tf does someone just

do that, awake in both places at once

i didnt even fucking realize that fact as i read that pesterlog wow

ah yes, around the time things got confusing

okay so the capsule makes sense bc at first i didnt know it was a fucking time capsule so i got confused as to how it just apparated the game lmfao

the more you know i guess *twinkle*

i find that a neat concept tho

like the whole whatever you prototype affects the imps and shit

yeah so that whole “he had no advice” basically impacted his future

no shit dave wanted to reset things bc he probably thought he caused some sort of bad butterfly effect and killed his best friend

fuck calsprite thats all im gonna say

i read that first sentence and i think i got an aneurysm

and then everything else just made me sad again

i mean good thing he fucking did amirite?

we got pain at first but now we got cool shit like idk

fucking DAVESPRITE

damn idk how that works

will rose have like two minds now? or will this be some steven universe fusion shit?

“and understood their meaning” course well i fucking didnt so could you pls elaborate, rose?

okay but then what the fuck did he use that was inside the fucking box

bc i thought he used his knife?

im only every going to refer him as that now, thank you andrew

alright okay..

god that was a lot

i dont know what will happen once i click on those links but i am going to see that for myself bc i refuse to add ANYTHING ELSE

[ponyregrets]

So what are your thoughts on S4 overall? I know you didn't care about the last season very much

my good friend @tlaloc​ asked for spoilers/if she should catch up on the show so I ended up writing a very long email with a summary of every episode in the season and my feelings on whether or not she should watch each one, so I’m just going to use that email as my answer here, anon!

401: The apocalypse is back, in pog form! They call the upcoming badness THE DEATH WAVE and it is literally a wave of fire we see it consuming some Egyptian grounders at the end of this episode so that's cool. Anyway this is a solid intro episode, kind of weird camera angles, but we set up Roan in charge, Clarke wants to save the world, Bellamy is attractive, etc. etc. I like this one.Watch: Yes

402: This episode is really weird because the big plot is about how they are gonna turn the Ark into a bunker to survive the upcoming DEATH WAVE and Bellamy takes a rag-tag bunch of misfits to some Ice Nation place to get a part they need, but then they discover they have SLAVES and Bellamy has to decide whether to get the part and leave the slaves or blow up the part to save the slaves. This was clearly meant to make Bellamy sympathetic again after the whole massacre thing, but by saving the slaves he reduced the savior capacity of the Ark from 500 people to 100 people so anyone who was still mad at Bellamy remained mad at Bellamy. Also Octavia starts murdering people, that's cool.Watch: Follow your heart

403: Bellamy and Clarke go on a road trip with Jaha because he found a new cult to be into on his iPad. Clarke has to make a list of 100 people who will survive the upcoming apocalypse. She cries about putting her own name on so Bellamy writes it for her. I don't care about anything else that happened. OH WAIT radiation is coming Luna shows up like dying of radiation but DOESN'T DIE dun dun dunWatch: I've seen this episode like eight times

404: OKAY NOW WE ARE GETTING INTO THE SHITTY MIDDLE OF THIS SEASON WHERE THE POINTS ARE MADE UP AND THE SCORES DON'T MATTER goddd anyway Monty and Jasper (oh btw Jasper was gonna kill himself before but found out that the world is ending anyway and was like COOL I CAN JUST WAIT so yeah) find the list and are like CLARKE THIS IS FUCKED UP YOU ARE NOT GOD Roan kidnaps Bellamy and finds out they are planning to keep the Ark just for themselves, Octavia gets shoved off a cliff, Bellamy gets told she's dead and is FUCKING HEART BREAKING and then all the tension is lost because they immediately reveal that she's alive, this will be a patternWatch: Eh

405: THIS EPISODE IS SUCH A GIANT WASTE like did you ever read the last twilight book where they are about to have a huge confrontation but then one of them can see the future and she sees how the fight would go so she's like nah we out? that's this episode. Bellamy figures out immediately that his sister is alive so they do nothing with ROCK BOTTOM GRIEF and then he has to talk this rando dude everyone acts like we care about (no seriously he is one of the slaves they saved in 402 and everyone is like YAY IT'S RILEY and makes a big deal and he is just a non-entity) out of murdering Roan and he does but it's a shitty speech also Echo is there being weird Echo is so weird this season I think they just want to have her around to date Bellamy if they chicken out of Bellarke ANYWAY Clarke and Roan agree that they will share the 100 spaces in the Ark, but then Ilian, the grounder who brought Octavia back, decides to set fire to the entire Ark and it burns up in a fiery explosion while Bellamy holds Octavia and and Clarke holds both of them and they're all like OUR HOME IS GONEWatch: Probably not

406: The Ark appears undamaged everyone is still hanging out living there it's SO WEIRD Clarke gets laid and stares at a picture of Lexa, Octavia tells Bellamy she hates him for killing Lincoln, which is the first we've heard of it since the season began, BUT THEN Clarke and Bellamy go on a pretty great roadtrip with Roan so Clarke can go to science island, where Raven and her mom are using Luna's blood to try to save people, bc nightbloods are immune to radiation. Also they need to go to space and are bringing rocket fuel. Bellamy definitely tries to tell Clarke he loves her on a river bank.Watch: Sure

407: OH this one is pretty great actually! Emori is a fucking badass on science island, Clarke is good, Bellamy has a GREAT storyline and also takes off his shirt. It's relatively plot light--black rain is coming and burning people, they need someone to test nightblood on probably--but a nicely done self-contained episode. This is also FINALLY when they start realizing what they need to do with Bellamy, which is shut up about the massacre and actually let him do good things.Watch: Yes!

408: This one is pretty meh. They spend the whole episode with Clarke having a moral crisis about using Emori to test nightblood, which is annoying because the moral stakes are fucked. Clarke ends up taking the nightblood herself at the last minute, which is theoretically fine, but they wanted it to be a twist ending so everyone kind of makes no sense up until then to make it happen. Also Abby immediately destroys the radiation chamber that they're gonna use to test if the nightblood really protects them from radiation so it doesn't matter anyway. Bellamy and Jasper go on a quick roadtrip to get drugs and then Bellamy gets drunk and probably laid, so good for you, buddy. Watch: Eh

409: This one was pretty boring IIRC? Mostly I remember that at the end Clarke tries to become commander and Roan shuts her down and decides they're gonna battle royale instead, and it was annoying on like every level. OH Jaha and Kane and Monty found a bunker by Polis where 1200 people can survive so they're taking all their people there, but Jasper and (randomly and stupidly) Harper and some other people decide they want to stay behind to die instead. Monty stays with them for friendship, but is planning to get to the bunker. The battle royale is one champion from each clan fighting, and the winning clan gets the bunker. That's their plan. It's not a great plan. Octavia's been off randomly having sex with Ilian and failing to be a farmer and she shows back up again to fight for skaikru. Her arc this season is a mess, but this is when it starts turning around. Unfortunately, it has nothing to do with anything else she did this season. It just starts going in a better but ultimately random direction.Watch: Eh

410: THIS ONE IS GREAT I was so ready to hate it but they do a good job with the battle royale. Luna shows up to be like IF I WIN YOU ALL DIE bc she's mad at basically everyone, which they don't quite sell, but it spooks Clarke bc Luna is an amazing fighter. Bellamy's like, listen Octavia you are not actually a baller you need to hide until most people are killed, and they follow through on that. Ilian saves her (and dies, you were v pointless, Ilian), and then Roan rethinks Clarke's "we should form an alliance" and forms an alliance with her. Bellamy has to stop Echo cheating and has a GREAT scene with Roan. Octavia eventually does win and I actually believed it, and she says they'll share the bunker equally, which was kind of annoying bc it was literally what Clarke wanted to do, but then it turns out Clarke and Jaha STOLE THE FUCKING BUNKER and also knocked Bellamy out to get him inside before they sealed it. which was SUCH A GREAT TWIST and I was so pumped but unfortunately, next episodeWatch: YES

411: OKAY so like this episode had a lot of individually good parts, but REALLY refused to pick a fucking lane with Clarke, to its detriment. There was great Blake sibling stuff, good Bellamy stuff, but Clarke was just kinda like "eh idk what to do" and really wishy-washy because they wanted this dramatic moment of her pointing a gun at Bellamy, which was fine, but then they had zero follow-up on that. BUT there was a great Raven subplot (Raven is dying of an ALIE brain tumor, I forgot to mention) where she talks to ghost Sinclair in her head and chooses life and I love it. But unfortunately there is ALSO the Jasper subplot where he gets all the kids but Monty and Harper to commit mass suicide and it was majorly triggering for a friend of mine. So, uh, yeah. Anyway in the end Bellamy unseals the bunker and lets the grounders in and O takes charge and tells them they have to pick 100 people for their slots and everyone else dies.Watch: ????????

412: MOST PEOPLE LIKED THIS EPISODE MORE THAN I DID I found the main plot pretty boring it was just Jaha being THE WORST and being like WE FOUND THIS BUNKER WE SHOULD GET SLOTS FOR ALL OUR PEOPLE and stirring shit as they tried to perform a lottery to pick slots. Eventually Kane talks him down and they gas all their own people and just use Clarke's list of 100 people to survive from 403 to pick. Whomp whomp. Meanwhile Clarke and Bellamy are kinda awks but it doesn't last long and he flirts so hard with her he commits vehicular manslaughter, which is hilarious, but Clarke's arc is such a fucking mess this season. ANYWAY they're on a road trip to get Raven that (of course) goes wrong, they end up with eight people on science island who have to go BACK TO SPACE to surviveWatch: Probably yeah

413: COUNTDOWN TO DEATH WAVE this was a good one, tight, single-plot with the kids at science island trying to get the spaceship working. Bellamy and Clarke were A LOT but they also made sure Bellamy had some shiptease stuff with Raven and Echo, I assume in case they decide not to go Bellarke. Clarke ends up having to stay behind on earth to get everyone else out, but because of her nightblood she survives. Bellamy thinks he left her to die on earth and is super sad. Then we get SIX YEAR TIME JUMP Clarke has a cute haircut and adopted a grounder and has been calling Bellamy EVERY DAY even though he can't hear her she just talks to him anyway and she SPOTS A SHIP and thinks it's them but of course it's a MYSTERIOUS OTHER SHIP DUN DUN DUNWatch: For sure

And that's what you missed on Glee! Overall I think S4 was better than S3 but the pacing was AWFUL and they kept just setting shit up and botching the delivery. I'm honestly pretty excited about the timeskip for S5 and I am looking forward to a hiatus full of angsty BELLAMY THINKS CLARKE IS DEAD fic like damn