#this is what happens when i'm procrastinating my assignments lol
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"It's not dysphoria" I say as I write an entire assignment on my own invisible queerness and gender identity, and as I feel like tearing my skin off and crawling into a cave forever
#i love that this seems to happen every october sdfghfd#those who have been here long enough know the pattern by now#but what am i gonna do about it? nothing probably. idk maybe something when i'm 45#i would be more okay with all this if i wasn't fucking 5'1 with the biggest girly baby eyes ever#god when cis people say 'but you're so pretty' all sad like it's a shame i'm not dolling myself up.#maybe i can pass as an 11 year old boy. and maybe passing isn't the point. but i would at least like a CRUMB.#....ah. that's why i'm so messed up rn. probably this assignment / research topic i'm choosing#and also having to keep my partner's transition a secret. it's not hard i just worry that someone in the family will find out#that's probably why i've procrastinated working on this assignment for so long lol. it's too personal.#i also had one of those days yesterday where i felt like everyone was scrutinizing me. and maybe a few old men actually were#but i mean who cares? but still can't queer people just exist without being a spectacle?#without cis people constantly trying to 'figure them out'?
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I have a writing assignment due tomorrow and instead of doing it I'm watching someone react to catching fire
man I fucking love this movie and I know we've talked about it before but PEETAS JUST SO FUCIING GOOD
like.
gale: I'm a jealous bitch cause you kissed peeta in the games where you would have died why don't u like me pls love me
peeta: hey I've been unfair to you and I'm sorry, I know what you did during the games was to keep us alive, it's not fair to be angry at you, let's be friends
like. Peeta the king of apologies
I've officially spent an hour watching someone watch a movie I've already watched instead of doing my work. also, 1989 Taylor's version comes out tonight and I am VERY excited about it at the expense of said assignment.
also. Loki episode 4 comes out tonight. Slay. I fucking love Loki and I love Tom Hiddleston (ik this is a Chris evans/his characters blog but u know what it's Loki I can't NOT mention him)
YES YES YES
I love the hunger games sm 🥺🥺 I reread it all the time and it makes me cry every single time bc it’s so good and yet so unfair and what happens to Peeta is so unfair and just the whole thing is so……. Harrowingly realistic depiction of war and ptsd and propaganda and just… I wish I could kiss Suzanne Collins’ mind!!!
The way she wrote the best male character ever (Peeta, like the perfect example of a man written by a woman for women) and also the most evil male character ever (Snow, especially in ABOSAS, like the way she almost makes you root for him yet quietly hints at his selfish, possessive and shallow tendencies throughout is so INSANELY good, oh my god I cannot wait for this movie to come out!!! I loved the book so much especially the final third which takes place in district 12🥺 and those final ten pages are INSANE they left me feeling sick and empty and heartbroken omg)
ANYWAYS BACK TO PEETA! Ugh listen I totally get you bc Peeta in CF is so hot and perfect and cute and just!!!! Gale could NEVER compare!! Peeta actually took a step back and stopped being angry with her, apologised, gave her space and protected her 🥺🥺 also i love procrastinating and watching people react to stuff on YouTube like all the girlies do this!!! There’s this guy I watch on YouTube who does movie commentaries (basically reactions) and his name is Dylan and I wish he reacted to THG movies but he doesn’t react to things if you give him the suggestion to react to it djdjdjsj
ANYWAYS yes bestie I agree with everything you said, Gale is a pussy ass bitch and the thing is most people hate him bc he dropped the bomb that killed prim but honestly the parts that made me hate him were how controlling and weirdo he was and how he was always pressuring katniss to be with him and kissing her when there was a literal war going on like PLEASE let her live!!!
Anyways bestie I don’t really watch Loki the show but I like the character from the movies!!!! And I used to read fics about him lol
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just remembered i have free will and can post about whatever i want so here's a little bit about living with adhd i guess (and funny/ annoying stuff i hear from people who don't have it) btw this is only my experience, and i can ASSURE you this isnt all of the adhd experience. warning, kinda sad lol (and now ive finished typing, long asf!!)
a big issue is motivation, like HUGE. My adhd causes me to have MASSIVE instant gratification problems, and several years in a row this has impacted my school. If a task doesn't give me satisfaction immediately it genuinely is painful to try and start it. I have so many art projects, sewing things, crochet, etc that almost feel like doing schoolwork if im struggling that week. I have been known to doomscroll for 7-9 hours IN FRONT OF MY ASSIGNMENT AT MY DESK because it feels like asking my body to hurt itself just to start work.
cont of the last one sort of: Wasted time (AGHGJSHGHGJA). I lowkey believe I could have done so much more with my life if I could just sit down and focus. Luckily ive gotten into the mindset of "keep pushing forward, you cant change the past" but holy shit its a killer. Assignments that take 5-10 minutes take 5-11 hours to START, and in these hours of procrastination i am NAWT enjoying myself at alllll. Its 5-10 mins of scrolling, almost start crying because i CANT JUST START, then back to scrolling, repeat. Plus what hurts more is that once i do start, it really only does take those 5 minutes
Now one that i dont really see! negative talk that comes with not getting diagnosed (oh brother this guy stinks!!). I'm gonna be short and sweet with this one because when I used to say this stuff to myself I lowkey believed it. A lot of stuff I repeated at my worst was "why can't I just do stuff like everyone else, what is wrong with me, why can't I just focus, Everyone can do this why can't I, etc" and what PISSES ME OFF!! is that SOOOO much of this is repeated/ planted by outside sources!! but i digress...
Hyperfixations! either amazing or atrocious!! Mine have never been terribleeee but they def get extreme! (for those that don't know a hyperfixation is a interest that DOMINATES UR LIFE for a few weeks, to a few months. Happens in autism too i think? and special interests are specifically autism and last yearsssss)
Fixations can be really fun and a lot of people i know say that it makes them feel like themselves, and gives them a purpose! but there is also a really not-fun side to them, some wild stuff ive experienced while hyperfixated: -can't go to the restroom/do anything embarrassing because of a feeling of the characters watching/judging you. -Stomach hurts if you see something from the hyperfix, or some sort of painful physical reaction. -Only work you are able to do is related to/correlates to hyperfix (I finished a project where I got to draw gravity falls the day I was assigned it, and I also got given a project from the same class 3 weeks ago and haven't started) -getting physically angry at slander/hate even tho it isnt that serious fr -internal monologue changes to a characters voice/a certain accent. You UNWILLINGLY imitate a characters little mannerisms without trying. -this one is funny but during my anime phase i watched so much subbed that I heard a commercial playing and thought they were speaking utter gibberish for 3 minutes then realized it was english and i had just gotten so used to Japanese w/ subtitles
Some stuff i heard other people go through (tw for sh on the last one) -Neglecting hygiene
-loss of friends because they can only talk about it -Failing entire courses or becoming severely sleep deprived -hyperfixating on problematic people or topics (you can't really control what you hyperfixate on, that's actually why I haven't watched shit like hasbin hotel or even skibidi toilet as a joke) -even in very EXTREME AND RARE cases, cutting because of the media, carving characters names, etc. and to stress this again, hyperfixations can literally give people purpose in life!! they aren't always bad! but i really don't see people talk about the downsides, and coming out of one feels like losing a part of yourself, the reason to be motivated in the first place (and this is also why I do think its important that non-neurodivergent people don't use the word to describe their interests)
other random stuff i guess
coffee/caffeine makes me tired asf, adhd meds and caffeine are both stimulants! thats why a lot of undiagnosed people actually use it as a makeshift medicator without knowing
for me personally, getting diagnosed SAVED MY LIFE but ill talk abt that in a sec
I will want to respond to your text SO BAD but it feels scary to me, like another thing on the to-do list even tho you could be the loml it would still take me 2 hrs of distracting myself to respond
ive seen a few people say that having untreated adhd feels like/goes hand in hand with depression, and while i dont think this is factually true, thats what it feels like lol
Adhd also gives you rejection sensitivity (not the official term but who cares), basically getting criticized or ridiculed feels like a straight insult at your character. felt definitely more as a little kid but can confirm BIG TIME!
another note to the sensitivity: it is very valid and real, before being medicated id cry once a month at school over small shit. I mean i still do occasionally, but i think EVERYONE i knew as a kid has seen me cry at LEAST like 7 times. also like every time i see someone describe the adhd experience well i start BAWLING. plus as a kid my youtube recommended was FULL of "how to stop being so sensitive, how to stop crying when told ur wrong, stop crying at school so often" videos
I never realized how much I cut people off when talking till someone pointed it out and I looked it up, yup its adhd
I was wondering why it got quiet a second ago but i actually never had any music playing, I just kept repeating the same song in the background of my head whilst typing this (peewee's playhouse intro btw) dunno if its an adhd thing but i see a lot of people talk abt hearing multiple dialogues at once.
meds can also be annoying asf but that can go for every mental illness. When i started mine i slept through the bell in 2 of my classes lol. (Plus i definitely need to up my dosage because it just isn't working as well as it used to.)
**btw dont be reading this with adhd by the way and think your like, doomed. Genuinely THE MOST bubbly, kind, and just downright creative people I know have adhd. i know it feels like a curse a lot of the time but please push through**
ALRIGHT!! now on to some stuff ive been told by people!!
this first heartbreaking quote was from my best friend. We were talking about our least favorite teacher (who had adhd, but my fav teacher also had it lol) and she goes "yeah i think all people with adhd are just annoying" the funny thing was that this was ALSO the day I had to tell her I was going to get checked for it so thats fun! pair that with good ol rejection sensitivity and we have a phrase that repeats in my mind once a day lmao. (dw shes been informed a lot more now and i dont think she remembers it but i corrected her on it)
second one! much more recent, my father was getting checked for autism (alr has adhd diagnosis). To prove to my step mom that him getting officially diagnosed wasn't a huge deal, he asks me "getting diagnosed really didn't help you haha right?" i just responded "lmao no it changed everything" because i don't think an appropriate response at the time would be "it literally prevented me from kms :))"
INFAMOUS ONE from my teacher! He was filling out my adhd referral form but he literally didn't pay enough attention to me in class so he just had me come up there and fill it out with him instead. The questions were "on a scale of 1-5....." and he would SAY THE QUESTION AT NORMAL VOLUME IN THE SILENT CLASSROOM "Does this student struggle with depression!! Does this student have violent tendencies!!" (not to mention a lot the questions were all geared to 10 yr old boys) then i would give him my full and honest answer, and he would say "well everyone has that!" and put THE NUMBER BELOW THE ONE I GAVE HIM. i swear bro he either needs to understand the questions arent for him, or go get diagnosed lmao.
*BUT ANYWAYS* thank you for reading this thing holy moly. I probably forgot so much and its 1am oops! hopefully this made someone feel seen or made someone semi-understand the struggle. Its just a lot of the time I see it downplayed as "ooh squirrel!!" while it has legit destroyed my life at points, and isn't any less serious as other well talked about conditions (obvs not as bad as other stuff but yk what i mean)
alright thanks again, bye!!!
I need someone to invent a machine to give anyone adhd for a month because if I hear “no I get it! I get distracted sometimes too!” one more time I might go batshit insane.
#adhd#neurodivergent#executive dysfunction#neurodiversity#adhd problems#adhd things#neurodivergence#neurotypical#rejection sensitive dysphoria
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omo congrats on reaching 600 followers you definitely deserve them 🎉🎉🥳 and for you event i'm joining and can the match up be with one of the tokyo revengers characters?? :)) ahhh i hope the information is enough
Personality:
i would describe myself as a introverted person and needed much more time to be able to adapt to social situations since they make me uncomfortable and awkward. because of this, i hole up in my home for as long as i can but the main reason is that i hate the idea of going outside. as an intp-t, i tend to keep my thoughts to myself most of the time unless someone asks me for my input then i'll say what's on my mind. i have a habit to daydream a lot especially when it comes to certain topic related to mathematics or economics, they're just hella boring. i am a musical person that have a wide range of music taste, especially classical and jazz but recently i got into bardcore 👌 i'm also a bookworm and read any types of books i can get my hands on. i am also a no-nonsense person and can't tolerate trash talk at all, if that happens, i don't even bat an eye towards them. i used to be the "won't forgive and won't forget" type in the past but now it's the "forgive but not forget" type. i do have this tendency to ignore eye contact when interacting with strangers even went as far as to ignore their existence, maybe mumble a response to show i'm listening to their words. i will warm up to them if they can show me how trustworthy they can be and it might take weeks or months. when i do open up to my friends, i can be helpful with their homework or can be the one listening to their rants and give advices. in the friend circle, i have the role of the listener, since i mainly listen to their conversation and adding my words here and there. i am a procrastinator, especially when teachers assigned projects i don't like, and do them few days before the due date but i still got the work done.
Habits :
i play with the hem of my shirt or my sleeve when i get nervous and starts to look at the ground like it's the best thing in the world. i also have lots of plushies and cuddle them every time i go to bed, it makes me feel safe. i can be insensitive sometimes and blurting out something i shouldn't have but i'm quick to stop myself when that happens, unless it's during an argument. i become sarcastic and passive aggressive when i'm angry but sometimes i will block everything out and take some time for myself to cool down. i worry about money sometimes to the point where i lack sleep because of it, though it rarely happens.
Likes :
writing, playing the piano and guitar, reading, listening to music, practicing my martial arts (taekwondo), taking naps, poetry, loyalty, flowers symbolism, my bed and pillows, plushies, sweaters, baggy shirts & pants, anything oversized, money
Dislikes :
cockroaches, noisy people and places, skimpy clothes, skirts, insincere people, children, mistrust, maths, junk food, hot weather, mosquitoes, racists, homophobic people, cigarette smoke
How I dress:
i dress casual and comfy, if i'm being lazy, i just grab a shirt and shorts and that's that. if i made an effort of dressing myself up, i wear whatever that are suitable for the occasion, and my clothes are mostly black and dark blue.
Love Language:
quality time and acts of service. even though i appreciate words of affirmation, but i value the two more than the rest.
i match you with... chifuyu matsuno!
i have a feeling you'd match with chifuyu's vibe JSHKJH
he's really caring and considerate for you, when there are times you have a hard time and just keep it to yourself (but he can tell there's a problem) he'll give you time but he's there to comfort you.
finds your taekwondo skills cool and awesome, sometimes he'd ask you to teach him because it looks cool lol. if you are having doubts he is quick to reassure you with warm hugs and words of reassurance (as i said he really will care for you)
i hope you liked this<3 !
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hi!! how have you been?? how’s school?? i hope you’ve had a good weekend!!
im sorry it’s been so long since you’ve last heard from me! life has been very busy lately and i’m just now able to sit down and give you a life update lol.
i’ve spent the last week working every day and in my free time, i have been doing homework and procrastinating 😅 but i’ve been getting things done and being productive (even on slow days lol) so i keep telling myself to just keep doing my best and it’ll all work out!
i have started my book! i have read about 2 chapters of it as i’ve been unable to actually sit down and read at all this week and when i’ve had a chance i’ve been so tired i haven’t wanted to. hbu? have you had the chance to read any books lately?
my girls weekend went pretty well, on the downside however, we did hit a deer and it completely busted up my friends’ windshield so we had to find a ride back fo where we were staying and then a ride back home 😅 on the brighter side, her windshield should be fixed by next week, and we watched movies and ate ice cream lol. i also got to see the person that i still have feelings for, as they helped give us a tour around our friends college campus and they even picked her up from where we were staying to bring her back to school :)
overall i’ve been doing alright, i’m just very tired and busy lol, but i can’t wait to hear back from you!! :))
hello, my love! it's so great hearing from you! and don't worry about any sort of lateness, i can understand from all the times we've chatted that you're a busy bee that works hard and always does her best - i don't even register the time that's past since i'm just as busy on my own
university is hectic as usual, as soon as i find room to breathe, i have another deadline set, it's kinda funny but also pretty exhausting. i have a dissection guide due this thursday, wish me luck on completing it on time. but i'm looking forward to going home for this coming weekend as it's my dad's birthday ^7^ - he won't tell me how old he's turning...typical XD
but i've had a pretty good weekend as i went to another city for some Jollibee! it was so yummy! it felt great tasting my childhood again after such a long time. i just had a lot of committee work to do because of all the social events happening in my society and we don't really have an assigned event coordinator so liaising all the event details for an social media post are pretty hectic.
goodness, when i say you're a busy bee, you're truly a busy bee! make sure you continue taking care of yourself and your wellbeing, both, mental and physical alright, dollface?
i hope more time comes to you so you can really indulge in those beautiful pages! currently, i've been reading the 7 habits of highly effective people - it's really interesting but, just like you, i've found it hard to find enough time to really sit down and read it lately.
oh my gosh! what an experience, are you and your friends alright? how's the deer? at least you got to watch movies and eat ice cream, that's a vibe that i would regularly enjoy if i had the leisure time to XD and that's sweet, the person you like sounds like such a wonderful person, almost as wonderful as you - but you can never be beat in my eyes ;3
haha! we're too similar, us two, i'm much the same as you, busy and tired, sometimes losing sleep but prioritising hydration as it's getting colder out now that it's winter. oh! semi-good news, i was supposed to do work yesterday but i ended up just playing pokemon sword XD lol i felt like i needed it though - that burn out feeling weighs a little less on my shoulders ; i highly recommend taking time to do something you enjoy doing in between all that busy-ness makes everything less hard to get through <3
can't wait to hear from you soon!
all my love x
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favorite book you read as a school assignment?, what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?, what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?, favorite historical era? (also, feel free answer whichever ask you really wanted someone to send)
I want you to know that this first one is literally the main reason i reblogged that post, LOL!
My favorite book from a school assignment is actually "The Book Thief" by Markus Zusak! It was the summer reading thing they make you do here in the states when I was in like 7th or 8th grade. And I was an angry, shitty little kid and was very angry about having to do it and procrastinated until the like, last 2 weeks, when I was going on vacation. So I just picked a random book from the list they gave us and lo and behold, it was this one!
I'm not gonna lie, this book changed, and greatly improved who I am as a person. I wasn't a great person then, and I think had I not read this book, I would've likely been a much worse person now. See, The Book Thief is about a young jewish girl named Liesel and her life during WW2 though the town and the story as far as I recall, are fictional. And it's very heartbreaking. But it's also very beautiful. Her life is full of such heavy loss from the very beginning, and loss is a reoccurring theme of the book.
What "The Book Thief" did is it taught a cruel child perspective, and compassion. See, Liesel meets many types of people throughout the book, from her adopted parents, one of which she loves, and the other she hates. It shows an annoying schoolmate, a mayor's wife who seems like she's a part of these horrible things that are happening around Liesel. But the most important thing it shows is that none of them are what they seem. The surrogate father isn't a saint. The surrogate mother isn't needlessly cruel. The wife isn't the monster she seems to be. This book blew my mind and wrecked my heart in the 3 days where I binged it in the woods. It taught me that often times who we see on the surface is very much a facade, and it's not fair to judge people for only the things we can see. Just, it's fantastic, and last time I read it I was 18 and it still brought me to tears in the middle of my english class, so, there's that.
It also has probably my favorite depiction of the character of Death. As a sort of exhausted being that carries these souls, not for any grand reasons, but because someone should. Because these were living people and they deserve that kindness.
Now that my essay about THAT is done, Lol.
First meme was probably, "you kicked my dog" on some meme website back in 2007.
I honestly couldn't tell you what's made me laugh the hardest. I've definitely had many moments where I was laughing to the point of physical pain.
For the historical time period, I wanna say something like ancient greece, or the viking era, or medieval times because I like their aesthetics or mythology, but honestly, it's probably now. As much as the world is a pretty constant nightmare, there's also just, so much amazing stuff out there. Media, writing, art, music, people. I've met some of my closest and most important friends through the internet. Some of the most impactful things in my life that really helped me grow happened within this last century, so it's like, yeah, as bad as things feel sometimes, i'd still say now.
Thanks for asking! And more importantly thanks for making it through all that XD
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can i get sources for any of these? because just at first glance:
we definitely don't support violence against trans people. i understand why you included this but i want you to know from the bottom of my heart that this is a myth. we do not support violence against anyone solely based on identity
like... yes there are radical feminists who are complete separatists, radical feminists who joke about killing men, radical feminists who wish that all men were dead, etc, but i dont think there's anyone who's actually proposing that we take to the streets and start killing every man we come across? when white supremecists say "kill all jews" they mean it. this is definitely not that.
i would desperately like to know what kind of life that radfem leads where she genuinely only knows 3 men. does she live on some kind of commune oasis? was she born under a rock? if you respond to nothing else i say, please give me that girl's @ so that i can get some pro tips from her
i am almost certain that there is more context to this one. and if there isn't, well that was a shitty and un-feminist thing to do
yeah i'm definitely going to need a source for this one here. trans women are the ones making those kinds of threats against us, not the other way around (if you'd like proof, go into my “receipts” and “violence against radfems” tags, although i'm going to give a pretty strong tw for some of the stuff in there)
ok first off "people asking them to stop" is nice but like... that's not a good enough reason to stop advocating against organized religion? because second of all, every major organized religion is wildly misogynistic. so no, i'm going to go ahead and keep arguing against religion, the same way i'm sure youre going to keep arguing against radical feminism whether we ask you to stop or not
again. need a source. and make sure that the people who harassed these teens to the point of suicide were actually, specifically, self-proclaimed radfems
i'll admit, radfems occasionally support a conservative person or source because their views, in one area, align with ours on the surface level (just like you guys agree on the point that exclusive same-sex attraction is bad). but i promise you, we as a community are doing our best to change that, and just because we occasionally agree on one point with conservatives does not mean we support the lynching of anyone.
some radfems have said this, for sure, but it is not in line with radical feminism. a major difference between liberal feminism and radical feminism that most libfems fail to realize is that radical feminism is a series of actions, not an identity. we call ourselves radical feminists as shorthand, but that doesn't mean that everything a radfem does aligns with or is part of radical feminism. having sex with men does not taint you as a person, and there are many het and bi radfems in happy relationships with men.
now this i haven't seen any radfem say. we definitely talk about the issue of compulsory heterosexuality and how that causes some lesbians to believe they're bisexual, but bisexuals and bisexuality have always been a part of radical feminism
Terfs: we don't support violence!
also terfs:
• support violence against men and trans women
• say kill all men UNironically
• "men are all disgusting, and despite the fact that I only know 3 they're all bad" (by that logic, since I only know 1 terf, it's safe to say that they all don't shower, have 4 cats, and have been reported 5 times for sexual abuse against women)
• tell their followers to go harass trans people for simply having a blog (just saw this one today too)
• tell people that "I'm going to rape you with your dick I cut off"
•frequently disrespect multiple religions, despite people asking them to stop
• have gotten multiple trans teens to commit suicide for trying to fucking exist
• team up with the same conservatives who have literally lynched black trans women multiple times
• "bisexuals are gross for having sex with men and are dirty"
• "bisexuals are just lesbians who are still under influence of the patriarchy"
#oof that was long#this is what happens when i'm procrastinating my assignments lol#anyway if anyone (from either side) wants to add on pls go ahead
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congrats on 5.5k!! you're insanely talented and I'm so happy you're getting the recognition you deserve 🥺🥺 could i join in the ship requests too?
I'm a rather small sized (like, 154cm & ~40kg kind of small) Asian female from a South East Asia country and i prefer men, especially men who are taller and Age Gaps™ 🥴 I'm not sure how much you know about/believe in astrology but I'm a Libra sun, Taurus rising and Capricorn moon so you can do what you want with that 😂
I'm an INTP/INFP (I've gotten both an equal number of times from sites OTHER than 16 personality, tho I personally vibe with INTP just a teeny smidge more) if you do MBTI ✌🏼 I LOVE to read, especially fanfiction lmao, and i also write! I really love listening to music + watching shows/movies too! My favourite shows are all mystery/crime based LOL and I am working towards becoming a criminal psychologist/forensic pathologist/forensic scientist in future! (heavily inspired by Criminal Minds, Sherlock, Detective Conan and the like so 😂) I have a really vivid and good imagination please i can spend DAYS just daydreaming and imagining scenarios that I never finish writing about & generally this is how all my work is never finished loll
I'm the eldest sibling at home, and my parents haven't always been around so I've been rather used to stepping up and taking care of myself (+ my sibling, like helping them with homework and all). Some people say I'm a natural born leader? idk bc I often step up to be the leader in group work & I'll often be the one to initiate things & all. I'm a rather big procrastinator though LOLL so you'll often catch me rushing my assignments & final projects & rushing my revision for exams + finals like, 2 days before the actual exam 💀 which often leads to me becoming more stressed out & breaking down more often than i actually should so 🥲 I'm trying to quit this bad habit though
I love cuddles and hugs please I will KILL for cuddles and hugs from my back by a tall character pls it just feels so safe and comforting to be spooned too 🥺🥺 sometimes when I'm too absorbed in work or something (which happens too often for it to be healthy) I might just forget to eat/sleep entirely AND also my sleep routine isn't the best. like i will literally fall asleep at 9pm, wake up in the middle of the night on my own at like, 1am, then usually I'll be rushing homework at this time, then maybe sleep again for a short while from 4ish? till when i have to get up for school/work at 5:30/6am 💀 there's been days where i literally looked so sick from the lack of sleep where my tutor once stopped the class to ask me if I was okay and if i was going to faint LMAO 😔 i feel like I'm a night owl??? but then also i have no problem getting up super early in the morning so?? but i really feel most at home and really enjoy the 3am nights 😌
i am also the class clown lol but it's bc i just make sarcastic comments and all and my friends think they're funny???? but also i enjoy making people laugh bc sometimes i find it interesting to try and see what kind of things make my friends laugh so it's lowkey an experiment? or like something i want to achieve? at this point. I'm fluent in English and Chinese/Mandarin and I'm learning Italian so I roughly know some basics, and I really enjoyed History, which I took last year but dropped this year. (I'm taking English Literature with Biology + Chemistry this year and they're all great, except I'm literally dying from the workload aaahhh 💀)
I'm kinda clumsy and Not Good™ at most sports, maybe passably okay for badminton but I'm really not that athletic and really not very keen on exercising either 😔 I'm quite creative and good with public speaking/creative writing/impromptu performance/speech though I'd say! I'm also in my school's drama club 😎 though I'm more of a backstage lights & sounds kind of person. I'm right handed (with a really neat handwriting, as I've been told many, many, many times) and I wear thin frame spectacles which I sometimes will fall asleep in & I'm so clumsy/careless that I'm actually really afraid I'd break them (it's happened before 😭)
I'm a really good planner? like i can do up a great and detailed schedule/plan for revision and all but i will NOT stick to what i plan 😭😭 i love to snack!!!! on chips + gummies especially, and my diet is quite unhealthy lmao i literally don't eat vegetables At All™ & i don't really eat meat that much too?? lmaoo please i can go for days without having a single proper meal & just survive on snacking on potato chips + soft drinks 💀 i am a very picky eater though so really me not finding food i like/am able to stomach is also really kind of my fault 🤡
while i really vibe with and love the dark academia aesthetic, i also do video/MOBA games, like i play games like Mobile Legends & all. I'm someone who knows most, if not all the lastest trends (like tiktok, memes etc) but i won't actively participate in them? i just kind of like to know things, like Knowledge is Power you know (I'm a Slytherin, in case you're wondering, though I've gotten Ravenclaw so often it's a close tie sometimes)
okay i feel like that's enough details about me? feels like I've told you nothing that's useful oh well LOL... I'd really love a ship for Criminal Minds and Marvel? if that's possible please? in case you missed it, i prefer men! (I'm a questioning bi, with a strong preference for men) for the hc prompt "what you do on your first date" or maybe "how you met + first impressions"?
thank you so much for being so kind and willing to do this ship requests thing!! I'm sure you're spending TONS of time and effort on this and aahhh i feel bad for typing so long paragraphs now (as you may have noticed i have a tendency to ramble on if not stopped because i am just really Socially Awkward ™ sometimes 💀 and have really bad (social) anxiety too) and i really think you're super amazing for doing this??? I'm so sorry if this took up too much of your time aaahhhhh thank you so so so much 🥺😭😭 really the biggest of congratulations to you for your 5.5k??? you really do deserve every single follower & i am SO insanely happy for you 🤩❤️
- 🌙🏒 anon
Don’t worry, you definitely provided enough information lmao.
And thank you for your kind words, I appreciate it.
I hope you like the ships I made for you
They are under the cut:
Criminal Minds:
I ship you with Hotch.
You get the age-gap here lol. He would be a bit hesitant due to the age gap at first, but he would get over it because he can not resist. He does not seem like the type of cuddles, and especially does not take part in PDA. But when you are alone he would love holding you and spooning, especially after a long day of work. Aaron would be attracted to your uniqueness as well as your intelligence and aesthetic, finding it to be very “you”.
How you met + his first impressions:
You met when you were transferred to the BAU as the new Forensic Pathologist.
Hotch thought you were very interesting when you first met and was definitely intrigued by you.
He thought you fit in fairly well and would get along with the others (which you do).
He appreciates a sarcastic sense of humor, so he would dig that as well.
Hotch could tell you had a form of anxiety and wold be patient around you when you first met so that you could open up to him at your own pace.
What you do on your first date:
He takes you to a hockey game.
He is not the sportiest person but he has had an interest in hockey for a while, sometimes watching it on tv.
When he learned that you liked it, he decided that this would be the perfect opportunity to invite you on a date as well as to see his first game.
After the game, you walked around town for a bit, getting some late night food and talking or a long time.
This allowed you to open up to him quite a bit and you grew more comfortable around him as well, which he is very happy about.
Best Friend:
Your best friend is JJ. She thinks you are really cool and unique and nice. She has the type of personality that is easy t get along with and open up too, so you bonded with her quicker than the others. I also feel like she is into hockey as well, so she appreciates your love for it as well.
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Marvel:
I ship you with Sam.
I think Sam is a good fit for you. He is into sports, and digs your aesthetic. He is easy to get along with and very funny. He thinks your line of work is very interesting and loves to listen to you talk about it. Sam also really enjoys crime shows ans thrillers so he is always excited to meet someone who enjoys them as well.
How you met + his first impressions:
You met through Nat, who you had met through SHIELD years before.
You happened to be at the compound with Nat when Sam was there and she introduced you.
He immediately thought you were pretty and very interesting.
Sam could tell you were shy, but that did not stop him from flirting.
Though he also made some jokes and was easy going as to not scare you off.
He made sure to ask Nat about you once you left and managed to convince her to give him your contact info.
What you did on your first date:
He took you to the movies first, to watch the most recent crime thriller that came out.
After the movie you went to a nearby park and walked around, talking about the movie and other crime/horror related stuff.
You got food at a food truck and sat by the fountain together.
He was appalled when you told him that you didn’t eat that often (if came a part of your relationship later on that he would try to cook you meals that you’d like just so you WOULD EAT).
You ended up spending hours together, and it felt like no time at all.
So you were definitely up for another date with him, which he of course asked you about.
Best-Friend:
Natasha. She was the first one you met, and slowly introduced you to the others. She thought you were really cool when you first met and was surprised at how well you go along. That is sometimes hard for her to do, so once you became friends she never took that for granted. She and Sam would gang up on you when you weren’t eating btw.
xxaaron
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Happy friday lovely!! I just happened to be scrolling through my dash and saw your response (what timing) My assignment is a lab report about the neuroscience of emotions. it's hard but so interesting! Hahaha no, it's totally fine, I'm working on it at the moment (well procrastinating I won't lie) Oh same, last night I couldn't keep my eyes open, went to bed and literally struggled so bad to sleep 😂 I'm sorry you couldn't sleep last night :( I hope you manage to catch up tonight. Oh my gosh, that's literally so sad!! I just read the speech now and my heart </3 I literally got shivers which never happens to me, so I can't imagine actually being there live. I think I would honestly be a wreck. And during 2016 too 💔 Clean literally touches my soul I can't get that across enough. I love how now we got You All Over Me when she talks about no amount of freedom getting you clean too. So full circle and special. I wonder if you could ask that same blog if they have the video? If they have the text from it, they must have the video?? Thank you angel, I hope so too!! though I don't think it's too likely purely because I'm a student but what a DREAM. I will 1000% start seeing her live when I can do. If I could pick one tour to go to, I'd honestly want to go to red/ fearless or rep. Rep tour looked INSANE, fearless looked so happy and fun and red just has so many classics. It is heartbreaking when cats get sick. I just don't get how people can dislike them. I really want an american shorthair (or even scottish fold) Hope you have a lovely day off today 🌺
Oh my! That actually sounds so interesting, but way to smart for me to comprehend right now lol, hope you made some progress <3 I love that so much about the vault songs! That we get full circle moments like with clean and you all over me or like seeing that she actually wrote “casually cruel” way earlier then when we heard it, I wonder if that’s gonna keep happening, especially with the speak now and the red vault! Which rerecording + vault songs are you most excited for? Crossing my fingers so hard for you to manage to go to a taylor concert!! I actually got really lucky and had my mom gift it to me, because I was still in high school when I went and wouldn’t have been able to pay for it myself. And I would LOVE to go to red tour if I could, rep is a close second I think, but even though red isn’t in my top albums, I just love the vibes of that tour a loooot! The music video gets me every time I’ve got a british shorthair and an american shorthair! But scottish folds are so lovely too! I have had a pretty relaxed day so far, not feeling as productive as I would like, but it’s fine, tomorrow will be better! Gonna have some pizza now though, so that’s gonna make it 10x better
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hi penelope, thank you so much for all the questions you've answered, i'm so so grateful that you've put time into this. you seem like you had a great tj experience; do you have advice for how to find a good balance at tj and do well but not get burnt out? how to get enough sleep? honestly just any general advice for tj or motivation would be helpful, i'm struggling a bit and I look up to you
Response from Penelope:
LOL I'm honored that my answers and experiences have been helpful to you! I suppose that is what makes answering asks on RealTalk fun for me :D
Brace yourself, though, because this is going to be long.
I actually haven't talked a whole lot on here about my earlier years of TJ (partially for good reason). I came from a middle school where I was able to finish all of my homework while the teacher was teaching and still get the highest score in the class, so getting used to the difficulty of TJ was something I really struggled with. My grades weren't great freshman year, and I'd fight constantly with my parents about it. They thought I wasn't trying hard enough, but I thought I was putting my whole effort into class and still doing poorly. Until COVID started, I wanted nothing but to get out of TJ, get out of NOVA, and get out of my parents' influence as soon as possible. (I even pondered the thought of writing a countdown till graduation in JS lmaooo)
The pandemic for me was a big turning point that actually was a good thing for me. I had a lot of friends who struggled during virtual school and while I did in my classes a bit, I definitely thrived in terms of figuring myself out. Whether it was how to get motivation or what I wanted to do, I used a lot of that time to nail down the things that mattered to me (and the things that didn't) and how I could most efficiently and effectively get those things.
It's hard to avoid getting burnt out at TJ, because things are always in motion. There's always something coming up, and you end up feeling guilty for taking time off. I was definitely burnt out during that time -- between all of the time I spent doing homework, my activities, and sleeping, I didn't have any time for relaxing. (My parents would beg to differ, as they would argue I spent plenty of time texting my friends, but I digress. We'll touch upon that in a moment.)
Of course, as you've probably heard a million times, sleep is super important. Set a time when you're going to bed. Find someone to hold you accountable for it. I'm a zombie if I sleep less than 7 hours (honestly the bar should be 8, but oh well), so I always try to make sure I head to bed before midnight. When I was a freshman, I actually hit 9 hours pretty much every night and even 10 sometimes! This went down to 8.5 sophomore year and 8 junior year, but if you block it into your schedule, it'll always happen. If you have that looming deadline of "sleep" waiting for you, you'll get more things done because "what happens if my assignment's not done by bedtime??" With enough sleep, you'll definitely function better in class, so you won't burn as much time on things like reviewing something you didn't pay attention to in class because you were tired, if that makes sense.
The regularity of a sleep schedule (among other schedules) can really get you into the mindset of working when you have to be working and relaxing when you should be relaxing. When I get home, I usually do a workout and then shower, because that gets me out of the academic mindset of school. I do this at the exact same time every day so my body always feels the same way before I try to do anything brain cell heavy. This works to clear my head so I have improved focus when I do my homework. You could also take a walk or just get some sunshine!
When it comes to actually doing your homework, do all of the short term assignments on the day it's assigned. Everyone looks at me a little crazy when I say I do this, but it helps you avoid procrastination (which is honestly the biggest issue that leads to burnout from my observation). List out all of the homework that you have to get done in a certain day, and figure out what makes you more efficient. Do you prefer doing short assignments early so you know they're out of the way, or do you want to do the tedious things first? Divide things into small chunks, which can make completing the assignment feel easier.
You can also motivate yourself to finish the work by leaving all of your "play" time for later. Do all of your homework on Saturday so your Sunday can be free. Of course, this doesn't work for everyone, especially if you have weekend commitments, but the takeaway is to not leave it all for the last minute. Last year when we had Mondays off, I would get all of my homework done early and my entire Monday would be free. It was awesome and very liberating to even just do nothing all day before we started another week of school.
Beyond the sleep and homework aspect, I would say the majority of my time (both work and spare time) goes to my activities. Don't overcommit, because then you'll end up being miserable. At the same time, activities can be so wonderful for relaxing and socializing. If you realize that an activity is no longer being enjoyable or beneficial to you, step away from it if you can! (I am pretty bad at this, though -- my friends can attest that I am the kind of person to say yes to something I don't really want to do but I still feel obligated to do it.) You'd be surprised how often clubs end up being stressful and toxic to the point where they're no longer fun to you.
Most of all, organization is key. Use tools like Notion and Google Calendar to figure out your schedule and lay out assignments, activities, and events. It doesn't have to be super complicated and you definitely shouldn't spend too much time on your organizational infrastructure, but this organization can really help you pinpoint when you need to get things done. You'll also be able to remember things like when you have to go to special events that you wouldn't have remembered otherwise!
With this all this advice having been said, I'm also not a super social person and my activities are either at school or remote. Most of these activities don't rely on other people having time, so my schedule is super flexible. My experience at TJ has been pretty drastically different compared to my classmates. I rarely go out with friends because my parents won't let me drive alone and I also have a pretty limited source of income. I spend the time some of my classmates are hanging out with friends doing my homework instead, and when they're doing their homework, I do other things that I enjoy, whether it's chilling with my family or exploring the woods near my house alone. I think it's super important to define your TJ experience on your own terms. This is what I want, and I'm happy with it.
I know so much of this is easier said than done, but just try to incorporate elements into it and see what works. Just be flexible with things and breathe. I promise everything will be okay! Feel free to reach out to our email if you want to talk with me personally about *exhales* personal TJ experiences (and this goes out to anyone else who just needs someone to talk to)!
I'm reading this over again and it is ... really long LMAO
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doing them all rn because i'm crZy
1. What’s your favorite character(s) to write for? as of rn c!Tommy and c!Ranboo (+ghostboo because the angst potential is just *chefs kiss*) 2. What character(s) do you find the most difficult to write for? Why? any characters that i don't know much about & any characters who aren't aroace-coded because i am a very Canon Compliant person and if they're not aroace-coded then my aroace ass doesn't know what to do with them. 3. Do you have a favorite scene you’ve written from [Fanfic Name] story/chapter? okay from my published fics: the scene where Sapnap stabs Dream in Promises Unbroken, and the scene in It's All so Incredibly Loud where Quackity is having a lil flashback to when he killed Techno. and from my unpublished fics: literally any and every scene from the Claire's Employee Ranboo Fic and every scene from chapter 3 of Dépaysement (which I will eventually finish editing pls just let me procrastinate a little bit longer). 4. Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of [Fanfic Name]? SOOOO MANY FOR SYZYGY OMG basically the authors note covers all of the things that didn't make the cut. Honourable Mentions include: beeduo dying at the end of Syzygy, and Dream actually going through with his threat to Tommy in My Little Dove (i decided that one was a little Too Fucked Up) 5. Do you listen to music when writing? YES YES YES YES 6. If you listen to music when writing, what were you listening to when writing [Fanfic Name]? okay Uh mostly classical music for Syzygy, Honey I'm Home for If a Tree Falls in a Forest, Rises the Moon for Of Warm Snowflakes and Home, Leni by Crystal Casyles for I Will Love Her and From the Grave, Misery Meat for My Little Dove, and Memoir #2 for in conclusion :smile: 7. What story/headcanons do you feel the proudest of? c!emeraldduo qpr, most of my characters being aroace, c!techno and c!phil nursing c!tommy back to health after exile, c!techno telling c!tommy stories to help him sleep during bedrockbros days, c!techno's lifetime transcending much further than just the dsmp (smpearth, his skywars/bedwars days, etc.) c!ranboo only joining the butcher army because he thought c!tubbo was pretty and he wanted to be around him more. + more that i cannot list here or this would become the longest text post known to tumblr. 8. Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi chaptered stories? one shots are wayyyy easier to write for me because i have a short attention span but honestly multi chartered fics have grown on me because you can develop more of a story and just get the option to use more literary elements which is cool i think :D 9. If you had to assign a theme song to [Fanfic Name], which would you assign? Honey I'm Home by GHOST for If a Tree Falls in a Forest because that's literally all i listened to while writing it and i based a lot of the story on the lyrics + it's just a really good song 10. What is the line you’re proudest of from [Fanfic Name]? i've got a couple i think (both from unpublished fics lol) uh so there's: "They were a mess, a whirlwind of untangling love, soulmates being dragged apart by the filth of human hands and sharp words, regardless of how hard the stars tried to keep them connected." And also: "It would sound of piano strings snapping, of comets colliding, of universes being torn apart by the rage of the gods themselves." yeah :D 11. How would you describe your style? (Character/emotion/action-driven, etc) hmm i've never really thought about this one tbh (i just place my fingers on the keyboard and let them dance around for a bit and hope they make coherent sentences) but i'd have to say probably action driven because when i plot out a story it's all character's actions that affect everything. an example of this would be Syzygy– if Schlatt hadn't decided to send out an assassin to kill Niki, literally nothing would have happened. (so in that case would it also be emotion and character driven??? idk i've literally never even considered this question). 12. Who is your favorite author? bunflower, zeeskeit, thcscus (blujamas), and
bellamees, all on ao3. i really like their writing styles and plot and their characters and WOO very good authors mhm 13. When did you start writing fanfic? i think i was around 2015-ish. i started writing in books with pencil and paper before bed and then i got wattpad and went WILD. 14. How do you feel about your older work? uhh not great tbh. i have about 2 works left on wattpad from like 2018 that aren't horrible?? but that's because they're just so poorly written to the point where you can't even criticize them. my older fics on ao3 aren't too horrible either, i just don't like them because i don't feel like they represent me anymore. any fics that come from before 2021 are fics that i wrote before i realized i was aroace, and i really tried to force myself to write romantic stuff even though i literally Did Not Understand It. i feel a little better about my writing now because i feel like it's more authentically me :) 15. What is the fanfic you’ve written that you’re most proud of? again, Syzygy. took like 3 months but it was the best 3 months of my life: waking up and immediately writing all summer Yippe!!! 16. What fanfic tropes do you avoid writing for? Bad Parent Phil Watson, SBI but they're Literally Family, and any au's that aren't Royalty or Vampires. i write stories that i want to read, so i tend to stay away from things that aren't really to my taste. not saying any of the tropes listed above are bad, it's just that i'm not a fan of them. 17. What fanfic tropes do you gravitate to writing for? Royalty and Vampire au's, Hurt No Comfort (which is weird because i personally prefer Hurt/Comfort), anything angsty tbh, Canon Compliant (this is a big one. if i'm not writing an au i'm writing canon complaint. and if i am writing an au, i am finding a way to slip some canon compliant details into the characters and plot any chance i can get). 18. Do you prefer editing as you write, or waiting until it’s finished? waiting until it's finished, unless, of course, i'm rereading before starting another writing session just to get caught up on the Lore, in which case i'll fix any mistakes i find. 19. What words do you think you tend to use the most? 'slightly', 'as', 'said', 'ached', 'murmured', & more!! 20. What feedback makes you the happiest to hear? anything that relates to my writing style and characters. i love talking about my stories sm so when someone comments something about a plot point or how a character reacted for something i do a little internal happy dance :D 21. Is there an idea you’ve always wanted to write, but haven’t yet? c!Foolish trying to make c!Eret immortal but ending up wiping their memory in the process. i've been meaning to write it for AGES but just haven't got around to it. (more recently, though, c!Puffy and c!Niki gay pirates would be fun too). 22. Do you enjoy making OCs for your fanfics, or prefer sticking to canon characters? sticking to canon characters. i'm not a very creative person so i think trying to make an OC would make my brain explode (it would also just be me except everything is slightly hyperbolized). 23. How much do you stick to canon? as much as i can. i mostly write DSMP rn which has lore that's SO HARD to keep up with. i'll do as much research as i can because i crave validation from the people who DO know what's going on. i'll deviate a little from time to time for minor creative purposes, but that's about it (ex: in in conclusion, Dream has escaped from prison and is looking for tommy, tommy relies on phil; that is canon. tubbo getting blackout drunk? not so much). so i'd say a solid 94% 24. Do you prefer AUs with the characters, or sticking to the original universe? uh i'm not 100% sure what this is asking but i'm not a big fan on mixing things like harry potter and bts (ik there's a lot of those au's like that out there). i tend to like to keep things to their original universe, unless it's an au that's ambiguous like royalty au's (because i'm not about to write a fanfic about the Queen Of England lmao) 25. What scene in [Fanfic Name] took
the longest to write? What was difficult about it? the scene in which Tommy is thinking about his time with Technoblade in From the Grave. it took so long because i didn't know how to fit it into the story smoothly and almost got rid of it completely because it just Wasn't Working the way i wanted it to. i left it in anyway though because if i had taken it out i also would have had to remove another key part of the story so i just threw it in and went "yeah okay let's hope this doesn't break the flow too much" (spoiler alert: it broke the flow a fair amount, i don't like it) 26. Are titles for your stories easy to come up with? for the most part yeah. i've got a pretty good system i think: PICK SONG THAT RELATES TO FIC or THINK OF A FUNKY SUMMARY EXCEPT YOU HAVE A 3-5 WORD LIMIT 27. What time of day do you prefer to write? either right after i wake up or right before i go to sleep. Syzygy is the only exception (i wrote all day almost every day it was NUTS) 28. Is there a part of [Fanfic Name] you’re surprised no one has picked up on yet? i'm not sure if people picked up on this one but in Syzygy at the start of chapter 2 Ranboo is very clearly afraid of death but near the end he doesn't really care what happens to him. that's a little silly of me i think. 29. What part of the writing process do you enjoy the most? (Brainstorming, outlining, writing, editing, etc) anything except editing. i despise editing because it's 50/50. i either hate what i wrote or love it. all the other stuff is fun because i just get to let the brain turn off and kinda go with the flow, but when i have to edit i actually have to THINK and READ and that's Not Fun (a little ironic, sure, but the Writing Demon that possesses me when i write is a quirky little guy and i'd like it if it stayed a little longer) 30. Do you write down all your ideas? What makes you decide to write one versus the other? i write down all of my Good Ideas. they all go to twitter dot com in the form of a thread on my private account. when it comes to picking which one i'll Actually Write, i usually pick the ones that i have the most developed ideas for. basically the more scenes i have already planned out the more likely i am to actually write them fully. 31. What was the development process of [Fanfic Name] like? the development process of Syzygy was funny because i actually started with the scene in chapter 6 where ranboo and tubbo are having a picnic in the forest. i wrote the idea down on twitter, took screenshots of the thread, sent them to a groupchat with some friends and jokingly said "now what if they were enemies". my friend told me that was an awesome idea and all of a sudden the story unfolded right in front of me. it was kinda cool how it all just exploded out at once. had a whole epiphany for that one (hasn't happened again though LOL) 32. What story do you think showcases your signature style the most? either Promises Unbroken or in conclusion. they're both angsty but also very sweet :] 33. Have you ever stopped yourself from writing something? Why? i was originally going have beeduo actually fall in love ROMANTICALLY in Syzygy but it just didn't feel right with the pacing and how the story was going so i just decided they should have a queerplatonic relationship instead. why did i do this? aroace moment. 34. Have you felt emotional while writing a scene before? What scene was it? there's a few bits in I Will Love Her that got me a little emotional but i think that's because it's a vent fic. there were also a few scenes in in conclusion (especially the scene where Tommy's about to throw the wine bottle into the lake and has a brief moment of reflection of beeduo's wedding. that whole scene is just so bittersweet and it made me tear up a little ngl) 35. Where’s your favorite place to write? my room. i get anxious writing anywhere else. 36. What fanfic of yours has the symbolism you’re proudest of? the fic is currently unpublished but there's one in which i use a lot of physical objects like fire and ice and stars and clouds and smoke
and all that Yeah i thought that was pretty cool :D 37. Would you ever collaborate with another writer for a story? probably not. i dont really know how it would work and i also work better alone lol. 38. What story of yours are you surprised that people liked as much as they did? looking at my ao3 stats: Risking it All. it's my 2nd most popular fic hits-wise by a VERY CLOSE MARGIN and i don't know why because it's literally just 2 characters hugging for like 3k words and it's a little sad like WHAT MADE YOU PEOPLE READ THAT???? IT'S SO DRYYY 39. What area of writing do you feel strongest in? angst. but not the cheap stuff where character dies and is sad. no. i want misunderstandings and awkward scenarios and two people are so broken and they're trying to hard to fix each other but just Never in the Right Ways. i want flashbacks to happier days that just make the current Sad one's feel even worse. i want Wasted Potential, i want lingering bitter feelings of What Once Was, i want nostalgia of better days, i want YEARNING. i want the shit that's realistic and hits you where it HURTS. 40. What area of writing do you want to improve in? all of it. absolutely all of it. i see so many amazing authors all the time and their fics give me gender envy but for writing style. *stares directly at zeeskeit*
fanfic writer asks.
1. What’s your favorite character(s) to write for? 2. What character(s) do you find the most difficult to write for? Why? 3. Do you have a favorite scene you’ve written from [Fanfic Name] story/chapter? 4. Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of [Fanfic Name]? 5. Do you listen to music when writing? 6. If you listen to music when writing, what were you listening to when writing [Fanfic Name]? 7. What story/headcanons do you feel the proudest of? 8. Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi chaptered stories? 9. If you had to assign a theme song to [Fanfic Name], which would you assign? 10. What is the line you’re proudest of from [Fanfic Name]? 11. How would you describe your style? (Character/emotion/action-driven, etc) 12. Who is your favorite author? 13. When did you start writing fanfic? 14. How do you feel about your older work? 15. What is the fanfic you’ve written that you’re most proud of? 16. What fanfic tropes do you avoid writing for? 17. What fanfic tropes do you gravitate to writing for? 18. Do you prefer editing as you write, or waiting until it’s finished? 19. What words do you think you tend to use the most? 20. What feedback makes you the happiest to hear? 21. Is there an idea you’ve always wanted to write, but haven’t yet? 22. Do you enjoy making OCs for your fanfics, or prefer sticking to canon characters? 23. How much do you stick to canon? 24. Do you prefer AUs with the characters, or sticking to the original universe? 25. What scene in [Fanfic Name] took the longest to write? What was difficult about it? 26. Are titles for your stories easy to come up with? 27. What time of day do you prefer to write? 28. Is there a part of [Fanfic Name] you’re surprised no one has picked up on yet? 29. What part of the writing process do you enjoy the most? (Brainstorming, outlining, writing, editing, etc) 30. Do you write down all your ideas? What makes you decide to write one versus the other? 31. What was the development process of [Fanfic Name] like? 32. What story do you think showcases your signature style the most? 33. Have you ever stopped yourself from writing something? Why? 34. Have you felt emotional while writing a scene before? What scene was it? 35. Where’s your favorite place to write? 36. What fanfic of yours has the symbolism you’re proudest of? 37. Would you ever collaborate with another writer for a story? 38. What story of yours are you surprised that people liked as much as they did? 39. What area of writing do you feel strongest in? 40. What area of writing do you want to improve in?
#my bad ideas#ask games#except not because i did them all at once#kinda like a Get To Know Me yknow?#long post
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Tag game
Tagged by the wonderful @wing--it thanks, sweet bean!!! <333
how tall are you? 5ft
what colour are your eyes? Dark brown
do you wear contacts and/or glasses? Glasses. Contacts weird me out.
do you wear braces? Nope
what is your fashion style? Uhhhhh...bootcut jeans, skinny jeans, preferably form-fitting shirts, flat boots or shoes so long as they're not flip-flops...buddy, I don't even know lmaooo
how old are you? 20s
do you have any siblings? A younger brother and older brother
what school/college do you go to? I graduated lol
what kind of student are you? ...I procrastinated till the last minute and wrote all my essays the night before or the day of and still got A's and B's on all assignments. Same when I went out and got drunk; I could have a hangover and still write an A paper...I wrote my 10-page final paper in 2 and 1/2 hours on the day it was due, that's how bad my procrastination is lmao. I can't function any other way because if I write ahead of time I get C's. Adrenaline was my friend when it came to school.
what are your favourite subjects?
Human sexuality, or anything related.
what are your favourite pastimes?
Reading, trying new teas when I can, baking alone, exploring new places, hiking, researching something that catches my interest.
do you have any regrets? You have no idea how many...
what is your dream job? Something in the human sexuality field of study, or just getting to read stuff lol.
would you like to get married? No. I don't like being tied down.
do you want kids? how many? No. I refuse to be around kids unless absolutely necessary or unavoidable.
how many countries have you visited? None yet!
what was your scariest dream?
Ugh I had a lucid dream where I was in front of a house with zombies inside (I hate zombies), and my dumb ass decided that even though I had control of the dream I should still go inside the damn house to kill the zombies so they won't eat anyone. I went in even though I was terrified and walked around with only a small switchblade knife (it was the only one I was given and couldn't find anything else) and was jumped by a zombie while looking and killed it. Then the house got invaded by a group of terrible guys, one got attacked by another zombie, I killed the zombie then the guy because dream me reasoned he was bitten, then proceeded to kill the other guys because they were seriously terrible people, went and found another zombie and killed that one, then woke up...for the record, that was only the second time I killed in my dreams and they were zombies in that dream. It's a bit concerning how my dreams developed as I always woke up before anything bad happened...
do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other? Nope. Does reading count?
put your playlist on shuffle and without skipping list the first 15 songs. ...hun, no, that's too big of a commitment for make. And I'm lazy right now.
I'm too lazy to tag lol. If you wanna, have at it! :D
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Hiya. Sry to drop this load on ur shoulders; I just need someone to talk to... lol lonely af. I've been going thru a weird funk, like just feeling depressed and unmotivated and unsociable all the time. I NEED to be studying for SATs rn but I can't get myself to do it. I'm just so done... Pls help
Ahh well firstly, thanks for coming to my inbox, nony. It’s really good that you’re actively seeking help!! And this goes for all my followers: my inbox/messages are always open for anyone!! Please please stop by n say hi c:
As for your ask…Honestly, it’s that time of the year. It’s the end of the school year, all the hard work you’ve been putting in and all the tests and assignments and everything have exhausted you. It happens to every single student (and no doubt has happened to me in the past as well). Summer is so close and honestly you just want it here - I getcha.
Hooowever, and I am only saying this because you asked me to help (so I’m doing the Big Sister Voice rn), you absolute CANNOT burn out. Don’t give up right now. And when you’re feeling unmotivated and down and everything, the LAST THING you want to do is start, but that is absolutely what you should do.You sit down - even though internally you don’t want to and you’re tired and you’re grumpy and whatever else - and you do it.
I’m assuming by SATs you either mean the Subject Tests or the actual SAT. Either way, you should study. How much you study is up to you and honestly kinda depends on your classes thus far. Personally, I didn’t study outside of school for any Subject Tests because I knew my AP classes had prepared me enough for them - but my school is relatively difficult, and we did Subject Test prep in class. And while I didn’t prep by myself, I DID still take one practice test before the test date, just to get a feel for the exam.Now, that’s not you. That’s me. Maybe (and again, I dunno who you are or what your situation is) you need to study a lot. Maybe you’re taking a Subject Test of a subject you haven’t studied. I don’t know, but you really, really, really should study. These scores are AWESOME for colleges - if you do well, it looks GREAT. like really. If you get good scores, it shows that you’re more than proficient in a subject - and if that subject has to do with your major, YES. Yes. These are important.If you meant the SAT, then goodness, you better study. Again, a good score looks good. And I get it - standardized tests are dumb. They really are. They tell you absolutely nothing about a student. But that’s what colleges look at, so that’s what you’ve gotta do well on. The SAT is ridiculously important - again, it will help you so, so much if you do well. It’s important. It’s important. It’s important.
And because they’re important, you have to sit yourself down and study.
Again:You have to sit yourself down. And study. It’s straight up discipline and that’s that.
There are many resources here on Tumblr and on the internet in general for studying - lots of tips and tricks, study guides, recommendations, etc etc. Now, what I DON’T want you to do is spend a long time looking at the “how to study” stuff and the “how to organize your study space uwu” stuff. Honestly, in my mind, that’s all just more ways of procrastinating. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice, it’s helpful, but if you have Subject Tests and/or an SAT coming up, then who cares how tidy your space is. In the end, you don’t tell the colleges “but i organized really hard!!!!1!” - you tell them “I got a 2400 (or for a subject test, 800) and I’m damn proud.” Or whatever score works for you (I sure didn’t get anything near a perfect score on any of my tests haha).
I know you’re tired. You’ve studied for nine months. You have put in so much effort and time and I am so proud of you for that. Now just finish off strong, do that last push, and destroy those tests.
Good luck, nony, and I’m here if you need me! I just finished that whoooole college process so send me another ask/message if you need anything else.
~Aisa
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