#this is very obvious plot point that should have reverberated across the plot for how the rest of zaun and piltover treated jinx

[mollysunder]

The fact that Jinx killed Silco, or that he was specifically killed at all, is so irrelevant to s2 (for everyone including Sevika) is so weird to me. If I never watched Arcane and randomly started from s2, or if some marathon came on and I made it to the start of s2, I wouldn't even remember that Jinx killed him.

To be fair, Jinx did straight up tell Smeech and they included Silco's death in that awkward black and white clip show recap of silco in s1, but it's just so completely inconsequential to the plot. Actually, it's also a bit confusing because despite knowing Silco's dead, Caitlyn still lists one of her objectives as neutralizing "agents still loyal to Silco". Do these supposed loyal "agents" even know he's dead? Do they know Jinx killed him? Why didn't Caitlyn mention any of this to the general public?

Tldr: In s2 it's easy to forget that Jinx killed Silco because it doesn't matter to anyone, not her allies or enemies. If I was a casual viewer, like I watched it s1 during the premiere and came back post-hiatus to watch s2 without a rewatch and you quizzed about how Silco died, I'd probably get that answer wrong.

[isolemnlyswear]

ooo could i request a remus x fem! reader where both of them are very shy so it takes lily, james and sirius to push them together. and whenever they talk to each other they stutter a lot?

always have, always will.

a/n : guess what! i made this way too intense again. i can't help it; its so much easier for me to write a really fucking intense love rather than a crush IM SORRY !! the end is the only cute part the rest is shite

HAPPY (very belated bc i don't have any motivation) BIRTHDAY REMUS MY BEAUTIFUL BOY

taglist : @oldschoolkiddo @amourtentiaa @anchoeritic @faeinorbit @tomriddleswifey @inks-and-jinx @jxsperhxle @punkrific @the-gazette-of-tea @krasivayadarling @orifortheweeknd @fallin-4-ya @incxndio @daisyyy2516 @hoe4cedricdiggory

young!remus lupin x fem!reader

---

"Oh." you sigh, blinking when you see Remus inside. Your huff isn't one of discontent; rather, as you enter the common room, you're simply nervous, timid to deal with the boy. As soon as you want to speak in front of him, to tell him that you really, really like him, you start blushing, turning into a stammering mess.

Alas, you swallow your fear, sitting down on the plush maroon chair opposite him and Sirius; Lily is on the floor, flipping through a potions book, and James is sprawled across your coordinating chair. Remus is lying against the side of the couch, knees up with arms wrapped around his legs. He's smiling, laughing at a joke Sirius told prior to your arrival.

Your heart is aching in your chest, and you try to will it to stop yearning for this boy, but there's a voice inside your head. One that tells you that he's all you could ever need.

Such thoughts reduce you to mush when Lily notices your arrival.

"There she is! How are 'ya?" the redhead greets you happily, and such a simple question is blocked out by your tunnel vision; you can only focus on one thing at the moment, and it's Remus.

You don't speak for a moment, zoning out, but when your eyes meet those of Remus, you quickly snap out of your trance, shaking your head.

"'M fine. J-just tired, I think 'm gonna go upstairs-" you manage to say, but you're cut off by an incredulous Sirius.

"S'five in the afternoon!" he says with a laugh, and you nod.

"And?" you quip, focus now returned when you tear your eyes away from Remus.

"Y'gotta stay down here, dinner's soon!" Lily replies, and you glare at her. She knows exactly why you want to leave at the moment, rather, she knows about how in love you are with one of your best friends. She raises her hands in mock surrender, and you sigh.

It's almost painful, the next hour. You're trying so hard to not make it alarmingly obvious concerning your... issue, but it's proving to be quite difficult.

And then, finally, it's dinner. You're able to get away with not talking, as you pretend to be eating anytime you're asked a question, and Remus is silent as well.

You eventually can sneak away to your dorm, wanting to sleep to rid yourself of the thoughts that give you no reprieve during the day.

But, of course, your dreams are of Remus.

---

Unbeknownst to you, and Remus, the entire rest of the marauders (and about half your year) are painfully aware of your affection for the boy.

And his for you.

So they hatch a plan; it’s simple, but effective.

You're all lounging in the common room -a typical Saturday afternoon - when James poses an odd request.

“Hey, Y/N? D’you wanna go look at something for me?” he asks, fighting back the smile that threatens at his lips. You nod, eager to get away from the tension that you and Remus are swamped by.

“What is it?” you ask as he gets up, leading you up the stairs and to his dorm room. You're confused, eyebrows furrowing and hands wringing nervously.

“You'll see.” James grins at you as you enter the dorm room - which has four beds, three of which are littered with laundry and other teenage boy things, but one is impeccably neat, and you assume it to be Remus’s.

“James, what-” you begin, but he shushes you with a laugh.

“Lily’s cat won't get out of this closet, y’see, and I know you're good with animals and the like, so could you...get it? For Lily, f’course, ” he asks, pointing to a rather large closet in the corner of their dorm.

You raise your eyebrows, but nod, opening the doors and getting in, eyes searching for Lily’s feline friend.

But as soon as you drop to your knees, a soft thud reverberates through the closet. James had shut the doors, and the closet was big enough to where you weren't claustrophobic, thankfully. But there is no cat in sight. None.

Downstairs, however, James had strolled in nonchalantly, and Lily’s grinning.

“What did you do this time, Prongs?” Remus sighs, unaware that the others around him are all aware of their little plot.

“Maybe you should go upstairs and find out,” James says ominously, raising a dark eyebrow. Remus glares at him, sighing.

“Where’s Y/N?” he asks, still holding his gaze on the brunette. Lily giggles, and Remus shoots her an impatient glare. “What did you do to her?” The question is directed at no one in particular, but the irascible tone in the lycanthrope’s voice demands an answer.

“Once again, go upstairs and find out, mate.” James’s tone, however, is one of amusement.

Remus takes in a querulous breath, turning to stomp up the stairs.

Undivulged to him, James is sneakily creeping up the stairs behind the boy.

You're pounding at the mahogany of the closet door, and you've forgotten your wand downstairs, leaving you helpless in the space. You ponder why James would do such a thing, but you brush it off, figuring it was another prank, one of all too many.

“Y/N?” Remus questions hesitantly into the empty dorm, and your ears prick up at his voice.

“I'm in here!!” you shout, pounding at the closet door, and Remus rushes to open it for you.

But as soon as he's inside, helping you up, James, with a flick of his wand, shuts the door.

You're locked in.

With Remus.

And it's absurd, really, how quickly your heart is beating in your ribcage.

“Prongs I swear to Merlin-” Remus starts irritably, but stops himself with a tremulous inhale.

“Fuck,” you whisper, cowering to the back of the closet. Remus’s scent is surrounding you, the honey and chocolate and dark cologne enveloping you in a blanket of bliss. You’re thankful for the dim nature of the closet, for your cheeks are rouging with embarrassment.

Little known to you, Remus’s heart is pounding in his ears, and he’s even more entranced by your scent, what with his dog-like sense of smell. It's his favorite scent in the world, truly, one he could get lost in forever.

“Sorry,” the boy whispers, slumping down across the space from you, and you quirk a brow.

“W-what are you sorry for, Remus?” you ask quietly, wrapping your arms around yourself.

“I got us locked in here, didn't I?” You can hear the soft smile in his voice, a bittersweet one.

“But that isn't too bad, is it?” you say, courage surging through your bones as the darkness shields your nerves.

“Oh yeah?” he asks under his breath, laughing softly.

“What, am I that unbearable?” you tease, tucking a strand of fallen hair behind your ear.

“No,” Remus says remarkably quickly, and then he hesitates for a second. “Quite the opposite.” His voice is barely above a whisper, but his words ring in your ears like a mantra.

“That's quite cryptic,” you say, taking in a deep breath.

“Y’gonna make me spell it out for you?”

“If you mean what I think you do, fuck, either I'm being terribly idiotic right now or...” you trail off, noticing that Remus is closer to you, now.

“Or what?” he breathes, and you close your eyes slowly.

“Or...if you're, um, insinuating what I think you to be, and I get words out correctly enough to respond...” you leave the rest of the sentence unsaid, words trapped in your throat.

“What then?” Remus says ever-so-quietly, and you take in another breath, eyes still pressed closed.

“I'd be making the best decision of my life.”

You can hear the boy’s breath hitch in his throat. You open your eyes to see that he's next to you, now, and the soft light from under the door that illuminates you as the sun lowers is glimmering on his skin, bouncing off the scars in his skin and the gold flecks in his eyes.

“Perhaps... Perhaps it’d be right of you to make that assumption. That I'm saying what you think I am, that is.” He breathes slowly, and your eyes flick to him again.

“This conversation is the most cryptic thing I've ever heard,” you say quietly with a laugh, and Remus nods in agreement.

“We’re getting the point across, though, aren't we?” he jests, and you giggle. Your expression then turns serious, and you turn so that you're facing the boy.

“Could I... Could I take you up on that offer of spelling it out?” you say breathlessly, and Remus smiles gently.

“We could say it on three,” he suggests, and you laugh.

“Merlin, we're like toddlers. Fine, on your count, then,” you reply with a nod, heart a jackhammer in your chest.

“One... Two...” he pauses for a second, and you let out a breath.

He's fully facing you, as well, and you see a glint in his eyes that's so familiar yet so new.

“Fuck this,” he says before the last count, and your eyes widen. “I love you, Y/N. I'm- I'm in love with you.” he admits, shutting his eyes like he's ripping off a particularly menacing bandaid.

You don't respond for a moment, mouth open in shock. But as soon as you snap out of your trance, you notice the boy’s posture; he's nervous, recoiled as if he's worried you wouldn't say it back.

You place a delicate hand on the side of his face, thumbing over his cheek, and he relaxes at your touch, still not opening his eyes.

You softly press your lips to his, and he responds instantaneously, one hand reaching to pull you in by your waist, the other resting on your cheek.

There's a fire exploding inside you, and it’s glorious, golden sparks erupting after being kept inside for so long. Your lips are dancing in a delicate rhythm with his, like they were meant to. He tastes like chocolate and bliss, and his hand wraps in your hair, tongue swiping over your lips gently.

After what feels simultaneously like an eternity and no time at all, you break away for air, resting your forehead against his.

“Now it's my turn to infer from that,” he breathes after a moment, and you smile.

“Not quite as cryptic, you'll find.” You smile, kissing him again. “I love you, Remus Lupin. Always have, always will.”

[dayseternal-blog]

Summary: When her gorgeous coworker hesitates to make the first move, Hinata plans to drop a few more hints.

Pairing: Hyuuga Hinata/Uzumaki Naruto

Written for @naruto-smut-monday 2021 - January Prompt: Snowed In.

(Please excuse that it’s already February 😓)

Rated E for smut and no plot.

Short One-Shot: Making It Obvious

The click-click of heels approaching make her straighten up and pretend to focus on her computer.  Her boss, Kurenai, stops at her workstation.  “Hinata, you should really go home soon.  You heard that it’s going to snow tonight, right?”

“I know, I just, I really want to finish this before the weekend.  I think I’ll be done soon.”  Hinata looks up pleadingly, hoping that her trustworthy demeanor doesn’t fail her now, hoping that her boss believes her.

“You’re not finished, yet, with that report?” Kurenai asks.

“I’m almost done.”

“Well, okay...drive home safely, Hinata.  And if it starts snowing, take a rideshare home.  I’m leaving now, and you should, too.”

“Yes, thank you.  You drive home safely, too.”  And out of everything Hinata’s said, those were the only sincere words.  Because in truth, Hinata was done with the report an hour ago, and she’s been doing her best to look busy…

Kurenai has walked across the room, disappearing behind a partition, and she can hear her repeating similar sentiments to another coworker.  “Naruto, go home soon.”

“Yeah, I know, I know, I will.”  His warm voice carries clearly, straight to her heart.

“Have a good weekend.  Drive home safely.”

“Thanks, you, too, Boss.”

Hinata shifts her legs, and the slide of the sheer, black tights she chose to wear to give her some extra self-confidence for today’s personal mission makes a slight heat pool in her core.  But she smiles and nods normally as her boss bids her goodbye, heads toward the elevators, and disappears from view.

She takes a careful breath.

It’s just Naruto and her now.  Just them, alone in the office.  The super good-looking man who’s been unconsciously (?) flirting with her just a few tables away.

A “friendly” pat on her head.  A glance at certain places on her body when he thinks she doesn’t know.  Lingering by the coffeepot when she’s there, too.

So why hasn’t he asked her out on a date, yet?!

She’s been trying to work her nerve up for a few weeks now.  If he won’t make a move, then she will.

Or so she thinks she will.

It’s now or never.

Now.

Or.

Never.

Thirty minutes later, she’s still sitting in her same spot, and each minute makes her regret her choices.

She can’t just go up to him, looking like how she is, trying to be..be.. seductive or appealing or…  She’s always thought of herself as more of a cute-type, but maybe that’s why he hasn’t asked her out, or maybe it’s that her shyness doesn’t make her inviting enough, or she just hasn’t been giving him the right signals.  So that’s why she decided to dress like this!

So embarrassingly!

No, it’s not embarrassing!, she scolds herself.  She knows she can look sexy if she tries, but to try to look sexy is just so embarrassing.  No, it’s not embarrassing.

She goes in mental circles, rebuking and reasoning with herself.

Taking a deep breath, she completes the first step.  Shutting down her computer.

Another deep breath and she’s accomplished the second step.  Removing her black blazer.

“Ohhh no.”  His loud groan reverberates against the walls, and she glances up from scrutinizing the satiny pearl camisole she chose to wear.

It’s snowing.  Really, really coming down.  White flurries dancing about in the wind outside the window, illuminated by the glow of yellow streetlights.

The sounds of him packing up are obvious, and with a knot of nerves gripping her gut, she stands, hoping to somehow catch his attention.

She doesn’t even know if he knew she was still here.

He comes around the corner, his stressed gaze immediately falling on her, and by how his eyes widen, she can’t tell if it’s her still being here or if it’s just her, looking like this that caused the obvious surprise.  “...Hinata…”

“Naruto-kun,” she answers, and searching for something to say, she points out the obvious, “it’s snowing.”

“Yeah…”  A quick glance at the window, and his eyes are back on her.  “It is.”

She’s certain he feels, at the very least, a physical attraction.

He closes the distance, coming up to her table, and their difference in height always just does something for her.  “Are you going home, yet?”  His blue gaze passes toward her blazer, laid back on her chair, then over to her computer, decidedly dark.

“Um, well…”  She obviously should, but unfortunately, the direction of this conversation already spells mission failure.

“It’s probably only going to snow more as the night goes on.”

“Yeah…”  She fidgets, searching for some way to prolong their time.  She looks up, daring herself to look him in the eyes, to try to turn on any kind of feminine charm that she has.  “How are you going home?  Are you going to drive?”

“Uh…”  He swallows, blinks, his brows scrunching.  “What, sorry, what did you say?”

Even his obvious distraction is adorable to her, and she smiles to put him at ease, as if she didn’t notice where his eyes were.  She’s just glad at the affirmation that they’re both bumbling messes in front of each other… That might explain a lot, actually.  “Are you going to drive home?  I was thinking of taking a rideshare.”

“Oh…yeah...”

“It’s dangerous to drive home…”  Commencing step three with this sudden onslaught of confidence, she begins taking out the pins from her bun, letting her hair fall loose over her bare shoulders, hoping upon hope that this is enough signals to tell him to ask her out by the end of the night.  “We could take a rideshare...together?”

He’s watching her closely, and again, a pinch appears at his brow.  “...together…”

“Mhmm.”

“...Here…?”

“Yes…?”  She doesn’t understand.  Where else would they get the rideshare.

“Hinata…”

“Mhm?”

“Are you sure?”

She nods with a reassuring smile.  It would save them time after all, unless if they live on completely opposite ends of town.  “Oh, I mean, unless, is it an inconvenience for you?”

“No, of course not, but…”  His hand comes up, and he’s touching her upper arm, something much more intimate than those cutesy head pats.

She’s inwardly cheering.  “I don’t live that far...do you?”

He pauses again, his look growing ever slightly more intense, and she understands this darkened look...and belatedly, her own invitations.

That’s not what she meant.

Heat suffuses her.  She can already tell her cheeks are staining pink, and this is not how she meant the night to end, but…if that’s how he’s taking it,...

She doesn’t mind at all.

His hand is playing up her shoulder, caressing her neck, and she instinctively tilts her head into his palm as he pushes her hair back, and he’s murmuring where he lives, confirming that, yes, she lives much closer, and he’s kissing her.

She sighs into him, her body revealing her desires much sooner than she would have liked, her hands pulling him closer, pulling herself flush against him to deepen their kiss.

The thump of his bag hitting the ground makes her smile against his lips, but she won’t part from him, not when he’s holding her waist, the stroke of his fingers obviously enjoying the silk of her cami.

It’s altogether lewd of her, she knows, but she rubs herself only further up into him, encouraging him to acquaint himself with her body, her senses thrilling as he launches them past propriety.

His hand squeezing her over her pencil skirt.

His arm wrapped securely around her waist.

His hair soft between her fingers.

His body warm and big against her own.

“Naruto-kun…”

“Wait...your place?” he mumbles into her lips.

They shouldn’t do it here.  At work.  Where anyone could catch them.

She’s pushing his jacket open, and he’s shrugging it off, dropping it on the floor quickly before wrapping her up again, and she hums in shivering delight as he trails kisses down her neck, his hands pushing and guiding her hips until she’s sitting back on her desk.  Shamelessly, he swipes his tongue over her cleavage while he drags the straps down until her cami is rolled at her waist, her strapless bra easily following.

“Hahh, Naruto-kun…oh…”  She leans back and arches into his hands and lips, a haze clouding up everything but the growing ache in her core, the moist heat at her womanhood.

He sucks and nips, squeezing and massaging her breasts, steadily positioning himself between her legs, her skirt now hiking up around her hips, too.

His clothed hardness presses right against her arousal, humping into her as they kiss furiously, the friction more maddening for her than he could possibly realize.

She can’t wait any longer.  Pushing him away slightly, he takes the hint right away, already working his belt off.

And that’s when he notices.

Her tights are crotchless.

His jaw visibly drops, his hands on his pants zipper pause.

Heat burns her face, but she spreads her thighs wider and lets him look.

Then suddenly he’s a frenzy of movement, clothes pooled at his feet, lips bruising hers, and his fingers rubbing into her heat, spreading her lower lips apart, a finger tunneling into her the way she wants his cock.  “Fuck, Hinata, you’re naughty.”

“Mmm…”  She wishes she could deny his accusation, explain that she wore it for confidence purposes...but the evidence is all too glaring at the moment.  “Please, Naruto-kun…”

One second she loses his finger, the next, he’s angling himself into her, forcing her to spread around his girth.

“Oh..oh, yes…”  She can feel her moisture slowly coating his member, easing his entrance, the rock of his hips nudging him deeper, closer.

“Hahh, yeah, uh, so,...mm…”  He sinks in, grinding up as he holds her hips down, sending flares of pleasure up to the crown of her head.  His exhale has him drawing out, thrusting in once, a low, throaty groan following that has her whimpering, only further aroused by his vocalized pleasure.

He draws back and folds her skirt up against her stomach, obviously watching himself pulling out, then disappearing back in, her black tights framing their joining bodies.

“Hinata,” he huffs out, and there’s a hint of disbelief and awe there that has her wanting to laugh, if only she had the breath for it.

Because he quickens, ramming harder and harder into her, his dick driving ruthlessly in and out, pushing cut, uneven gasps from her throat.  He creates a senseless, rude rhythm, jerking and grinding her into nothing more than heated breath and body.  Dropping weightily, he shoves his tongue against hers, a singing connection that surges through her, and she’s reaching for him, grabbing for his rounded shoulders.

“This too rough?”  His darkened, lidded gaze, the taste of his lips, the heat of his words.

Shaking her head and kissing him is all she can do in enthusiastic response.

Arms wrap around her, dragging her down from the desk, breaking her out of their dazed kiss, and he mumbles, “Turn around for me.”

Leaning over, she registers her work station, now completely defiled, never to appear the same to her ever again.  Yet these wandering thoughts evaporate with his groping hands on her ass, his manhood piercing back into her easily, splitting her flesh apart.

He’s reaching deeper than before, steadily moving faster and harder into a pace that definitely won’t last.  Strong arms reach beneath her, one hand gripping her breast possessively, and it’s been so long since she’s felt this desired, this free and pleasured.

She reaches down to rub her clit, the extra stimulation almost making her knees buckle.  Sizzling fire burns her toes, up through her clenching sex, zinging along her spine until she’s fighting to keep from shrieking.

“Agh...ugh.....”  His low, chopped moans have her stirring herself up relentlessly, her whole body locking up in suffocating anticipation, senses narrowing to a searing point.

Her whole body trembles in hot, wild ecstasy, clenching and pulling on him in desperate delight.  A breathless scream heats her throat, alighting above the heavy thump of her throbbing pulse.

“Fuck.”  He pulls out just as she’s calming.  She can feel him rubbing into her exposed skin, then his wet tip circling and sloppily kissing about her lower lips.  Hot seed drips down her inner thighs, staining her tights.

In the ensuing quiet of her heartbeat, she looks back with an exhausted smile, appreciative of his consideration.  She’s on birth control, so he needn’t have worried about it, but the thought is still indicative of his character.

Naruto really is a good guy.

He palms his face, quietly panting, his chest visibly rising and falling.  She watches him blink as if he’s waking from a hallucination.  Noticing her gaze, he smiles, too.  “I’ll go get tissues.”

She waits patiently.  A poking part of her self-consciousness is appalled at tonight’s development, but she ignores it as best she can, instead resting her head in her arms.

And when he returns, he actually wipes her up a bit until she straightens before handing her the tissue for her to do the rest.

“Thank you,” she murmurs.  If she didn’t know what to say before, she really doesn’t know what else to say now.

Luckily, Naruto’s strong point is his social abilities.  He’s pulling his pants back on when he breaks the silence.  “Hinata, this is by far the hottest thing that’s ever happened to me.”

She winces and blushes.  “...Me, too.”

He looks up, slightly incredulous.  “Really?”

“I swear I’ve never done this before.”

“But you wear those things all the time.”

“No, I don’t!”  She pulls her skirt down and smooths it out far more aggressively than necessary.  “I, I just wore it today because I wanted to give myself confidence...to approach you.”

He looks really thoughtful as he straightens his clothing out, and she hopes she’s somehow rectified her image.  “So, like, when you have to do a presentation or meet a potential partner or client, you wear that?  For confidence.”

Her jaw drops, and she really wants to say no.

His straight expression morphs into the evilest grin she’s ever seen.  “Good to know, good to know…”

“Naruto-kun!”

His hands fly up in innocent defense.  “I was just asking.”

She hurriedly puts on her blazer, as if by covering herself up into a proper lady, she’ll be able to erase whatever dirty direction his mind is going.

He picks up his own jacket from the floor, redressing, and now it’s like the past ten minutes never happened.

They silently head out to wait for the elevator.

“Sooo…” Naruto starts, “dinner?”

She looks up at him in amazement.

“This,” he gestures back at the office, “wasn’t meant to be a one-time thing or...?”

A smile bursts across her face, so incredibly relieved that he doesn’t just see her as a good lay.  “Oh no, I’d love dinner.  My place?”

“Your place,” he easily agrees.  His hand gently lands around her waist to guide her into the elevator.

----

He was kind and gentle for the rest of the night, their relationship kicking off wonderfully, and it’s as if she could forget she accidentally propositioned him in the office…

She could almost forget…

If he weren’t sticking his hand up her skirts everyday “just to check.”

[the-scavengergirl]

Be Delicate ( not the title )

Haven’t written a Reylo or any Fanfic in a hot minute. Thought I wrote this for someone, perhaps it was just for me. Who the fuck knows. And I’m teetering on maybe seeing my way out of the fandom, still not sure. So if you like this. Thank you, if not, that is fine as well. 

Per usual I own no one. Not that characters, especially not the lovely Daisy or Adam. And certainly not the horrid song exile feat that got this stuck in my brain by miss T.swift.feat. the glorious Bon Iver So that being said. Lets carry on. Also some parts are memories so there are no confusion. Also may post this on AO3 same pen name <3 on with the Bullshit. Also the pic that was inspo isn’t mine, it was a screenshot from the movie clip.

It didn’t take her long. She’d always spot him out in a crowded room. It didn’t matter how many there were she’d always see him over everyone else. But it didn’t appear to go both ways. She’d been four drinks in when his head turned, the girl at his hip catching where his attention had gone off to, and everything came to a stand still.

I can see you standin', honey With his arms around your body Laughin' but the joke's not funny at all And it took you five whole minutes To pack us up and leave me with it Holdin' all this love out here in the hall

And she’d never hated him more in that moment. She had to press her fingers against her face to look at him properly in the lighting, the flickering catching the frame of the stupid issued glasses. The way the lights gave his nearly translucent skin an odd sort of glow. Never before had he looked more perfect.

She was already three steps ahead of his one as he came towards her, her head shaking slightly beneath the hat Poe had found her, stating it would go in the ridiculous outfit she was currently mucking around in, Her drink pressed so tightly to her mouth she was sure the glass would shatter. “ Please don’t--we can’t do this anymore Ben. There is nothing more to talk about.”

Rey watched the way his jaw shifted. Sometimes it was the only way to tell his mood, as he could be a man of few words. But Ben Solo was annoyed, he didn’t like being silenced. But they’d been down this road too many times. And she was done.

“ It is quite obvious what has happened, and I’m tired of it. You’ve played me as a fool, and I let myself believe you actually had feelings for a girl like me. I believed you Ben--”

I think I've seen this film before And I didn't like the ending You're not my homeland anymore So what am I defendin' now? You were my town Now I'm in exile seein' you out I think I've seen this film before

The tears were never part of the game. She thought when she and Poe had shared a bottle of wine prior to coming, and his grand idea of changing her style that had her ready to face the real issue...Ben Solo.

But he always had a way of looking about her that made her feel as if he were undressing her. And not always in a way that sent shivers down her spine. As if she were to be reprimanded at any given moment, the way she had been time and time again back in the home and she hated it, because he knew that about her. He knew everything about her. She’d laid herself open for him like an open book, and he’d thrown it in her face. Just as he’d promised not to.

“ You’re running Rey. You know you can’t run forever. Not from me.”

It was as if Poe could see her panic, pulling her from the place where she shook, and yet remained rooted in place, unable to walk away. Because Poe knew, she’d never be able to walk away. She did have that power, no matter how toxic their relationship had grown. And their last fight had done her in, Ben’s words a seething venom that even Poe felt hit extra hard, especially hard when he knew where she’d come from, promising to love her, to fix all the pieces that had been broken. Split wide open.

I can see you starin', honey Like he's just your understudy Like you'd get your knuckles bloody for me Second, third, and hundredth chances Balancin' on breaking branches Those eyes add insult to injury

“ You come from nothing. You’re nothing.” She couldn’t describe the sound that left her, only the feel of the glass as it slipped from her fingers, shattering to pieces, one shard catching her in the pad of her foot, due to the stupid sandals that Poe said would be a smart purchase.

Her body pitched backwards as if she’d been thrown, an invisible force propelling her away from him as she felt something along the plains of her cheeks, doting them like the constellation like freckles she hated so. *Tears*.

“But you said--”

“Who the fuck cares what I said Rey. What about the things you said. What about the promises you’ve made, and broken. I’m done. I told you that. Rey it’s been 6 months. I told you, it was time to let old things die, and you couldn’t--you wouldn’t do it so I’m done. We are done. In case you didn’t notice that one.”

Of course he’d use her past against her. The one thing he promised he’d never do. If there was one thing Rey wasn’t proud of it was how she’d treated him. In the end. She knew in the process of finding herself she’d treated him horribly. His childhood had been difficult as well, and perhaps after their first breakup, when they stood shouting at one another, anger radiating off of them in waves as they stood in the rain outside his uncles they should have called it quits. But they were electric, like two magnets, when things were bad nothing could bring them together. But when things were good, they were drawn together so tightly, it was like they seeped into each others every being.

“ Yes--I’ve noticed Ben. You’ve made that very clear. In every text. In every call. In every attempt at getting into touch with you. Yes this is some plot, such a great one, poor Rey, so desperate she had to involve your Mother.”

Rey hadn’t realized the magnitude or the moment in which the octave of her voice changed, only that everything sounded like she was trapped in a tunnel, and everything around them seemed to fade out. The noise around them suddenly reverting to  nearly nothing.

“ I forgot the world revolved around Benjamin Organa Solo. Maybe if you answered your fucking phone I wouldn’t have to search you out, but forget it. And just so you know, this wasn’t about us. I give a fuck about us. I’m actually packed up, I won’t be a problem to you anymore so don’t worry. It’s your dad Ben….he’s sick. Thought you’d want to know since you won’t speak to anyone but what’s her name right here.”

I think I've seen this film before And I didn't like the ending I'm not your problem anymore So who am I offending now? You were my crown Now I'm in exile seein' you out I think I've seen this film before So I'm leavin' out the side door

She didn’t wait for Poe, or remember her feet carrying her to the car, only the feel of the way the shard of glass dug further into her foot, and the way the blood seeped and flowed across the bridge of her foot freely as she pushed down on the break.

Seattle rain had always been one of Rey’s least and most favorite things about where she lived. Some Days it made her want to do nothing more than tuck herself away in the depths of her blankets and sleep until little glimmers of sun broke through, and that could be days. It wasn’t until she met Ben, with his boundless bursts of energy, and his stupid need for a dog, the one she ended up with that gave her an excuse to pry herself out of bed on the harder days, after copious amounts of coffee of course.

But as she pulled away, Ben screaming her name the rain made her more unsettled than it ever had. She was glad she couldn’t see her phone, knowing she’d forgotten to remove that picture of him. Her fingers reached for the dial to turn whatever song was playing.

All this time We always walked a very thin line You didn't even hear me out (You didn't even hear me out) You never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs) many signs) So many signs So many signs (You didn't even see the signs)

It sounded like the blade of a handsaw being pressed against her ear despite the fact she was in her own car. Her eyes widened in horror as she watched the car from behind her hydroplane across into the other lane hitting not only the oncoming car, but the guardrail. It took another 30 seconds for her to realize, and the moment her head made contact with the widow a sickening crack reverberating through the cab. It was then and only then through the sticky trickle of blood she realized it was Ben’s car that had slammed into her after ricocheting across the two lane highway like some sick game of pinball.

They always said in moments of trauma, your body floods with adrenaline, the shock taking over so the pain becomes nearly nonexistent. But with Rey this was not the case. The lights were blinding, and she couldn’t for the life of her figure out where the horrifying screaming was coming from, until she realized it was coming from her. But nothing she was saying made sense, and then there were hands, soft, soothing.

“ Hi honey, my name is Rose. You’ve been in an accident. Can you tell me your name?”

“ Ben--is”

“ Your name is Ben? I need to keep your head still sweet girl, you have a cervical collar and some facial swelling.I need to know your name if you can.”

“ No my name is Rey--the other was he brought in? He is Ben--I’m fine I need to know if he is alright.”

But she wasn’t fine. The swelling in her brain was severe enough it took 4 days under constant watch, and intervention to get it to a point where the doctors felt she was out of the woods. 4 days before they lifted her from that dark and heavy underwater feeling where time never changed. 4 days before she saw Rose again.

The human body at nearly 200lbs endures the average impact force of 43,050lbf traveling at 65mph, assuming the driver was wearing a seatbelt. Meaning the body feels like it's getting hit with a mass of 43,035lbs. But knowing Ben, in his anger, and the fact on more occasions than not he would forego the seatbelt all together, complaining that they needed to survey people his size as to make proper seat belt placement so they weren’t so fucking usless and uncomfortable.

Therefore changing the schematics drastically, a person Ben’s size, of nearly 200lbs, because he’d taken up the gym again, and quite diligently from what Rey could see, a man of Ben’s size at nearly 200lbs traveling without a seat belt at 65mph would endure the average impact force of 215,248 lbf. Meaning on initial impact with the oncoming car it felt like getting hit with a mass of 215,174 lbs.

An African Bush Elephant weighs 13,000lbs.

Ben was hit upon impact, with the weight of sixteen African Bush Elephants before hitting the guardrail, and bouncing off of her. *Sixteen*. And didn’t die upon impact.

That had to speak for something.

She thought she could see his face, in the darkness. Perhaps it had been wishful thinking, or the drugs they pumped through her veins. She didn’t hear anything Rose said to her after that, the number sixteen playing over and over in her mind like some annoying buzzing noise that wouldn’t go away.

Of course she didn’t need to be told he was gone, she could feel it. She startled awake, the only thing to greet her was the beep of the machines hooked to every bit of her being. And she just knew. She couldn’t feel him, from the moment she’d seen him across the library there was something about him. The way he’d smiled at her, making her shift uncomfortably from where she was hidden in the stacks, there was this connection. Like he’d split her whole being open with that one look and nod of his head. She was done for.

“Do you believe in soulmates?”

His voice was low and lulling. And she could honestly listen to him speak about anything well into the hours that would make her regret life in the morning. And that was exactly what was happening. She’d just been dozing off when he fired off one of his questions, the bed dipping with his weight which meant he’d turn to face her. His fingers brushing a curl from her face and removing the glasses she’d forgotten to remove in her drowsy state.

“ What? Soulmates--what are you on about?”

She didn’t turn on her side the way he had, instead opting to simply turn her head a bit on the pillow. Perhaps afraid of what she’d find if she really looked at him.

“ Yes, soulmates. I mean I’m not sure I believe in the everyone has someone made for them and that fucking garbage, but we’ve gone to the same school for years. We’ve had classes, and not said a word or given each other a glance.”

“ You did lop me in the head with your paper while I was at the pottery wheel that one time.”

“ Yes, but it wasn’t intentional, and you didn’t move. So irrelevant. But never once did we really pay each other any mind, brushed shoulders, passed things without glances, or words beyond our work. Then one day, it was like something just aligned, and you were right there, and you looked up, and I knew you felt it too.”

She wanted to tell him he was fucking crazy. To ask him if he’d eaten one of Hux’s fucking edibles again. But she could tell from his tone he was serious.

“ Yea, maybe. It would be nice you know…”

Ben didn’t answer, instead allowing his fingers that he’d held in the air like a giant web, as if tracing the stars to fall over her face, giving it a gentle squeeze before tightening his hold to place a kiss on her lips. No further words exchanged. Only the soft sound of his breathing as it evened out in sleep.

Rey had wanted to pretend she was asleep that night.She was selfish like that. She’d been exhausted from being hunched over the pottery wheel all day, and then her shift at the gallery seemed never ending. And so when they finally climbed into bed nearing 1 a.m. She just wanted to sleep.

She was glad she stayed up that night.

Because he’d been right. She had felt him the moment he looked at her. And now she couldn’t and she’d never felt so alone. And she’d grown up alone. She knew loneliness. Until Ben came along, filling all those spaces as if they’d never existed.

“Rey--”

The noise caught her off guard, causing her to bump herself against the bed in a way that made her realize just how poorly she was, her eyes falling on the frame of Leia Organa nee Solo and then once again Solo. Her normally pristine appearance looking about as wonderful as Rey was sure she looked.

“ You had me as your next of kin, in case of emergency, after Ben…”

It was not only the tone in which Leia spoke, but her last words that solidified Rey’s assumptions. Between that and her hesitant and careful approach, and the emptiness and fluttering anxiety that was threatening to burst from her chest, Rey wasn’t sure if she could handle it, her finger reaching for the button hoping for at least some small miracle that the kind woman Rose would appear, because if she was about to be told what she knew, she didn’t think she’d be able to bare it. It would kill her.

“ You’re awake. Miss Organa you’re here. Oh honey--”

One look from Rose’s face Rey knew the woman was slowly piecing everything together.

“ Alright, let's get this in and sit you up a bit yeah?”

Rey didn’t ask questions, allowing the small womans hands to do its work. She watched as she scurried out, Leia remaining rooted in her place, but out of the way, a syringe making its appearance and then disappearing again. As she suspected the medicine was for her nerves, a wave of calm settled over her, followed by Rose as she sat besides Rey, her fingers plucking at the small brush.

“ Ms. Organa, why don’t you take a seat.I did this while we had you sedated and resting. You got horrible knots. So let's keep that up, what do you think?”

Rey was used to this sort of talk, the social workers would use deflection to let her know her parents, or her mother in particular, weren't coming. She supposed it was to make the let down easier. And in a way it worked. It was soothing she supposed.

“He’s gone isn’t he?”

I think I've seen this film before And I didn't like the ending You're not my homeland anymore So what am I defending now? You were my town Now I'm in exile seein' you out I think I've seen this film before So I'm leaving out the side door

She figured she’d save them both the trouble. Rose was a godsend and Leia looked as if she couldn’t do or say another thing.

“ He is, would you like to see him?”

The sheer thought of him still being in the same place as her, but not really existing, sent Rey’s stomach turning, and poor Rose didn’t have a moment to escape, not that there was much. It was violent, and clawing. And it rolled through her in waves.

“ We wanted to give you the option first.”

It was Leia this time. Who’d finally come to Rey’s side. Her fingers holding Rey’s as Rose held the small basin, whispering nonsensical words of encouragement.

“ No--why would I want to see him. He is gone. I killed him.”

Her cries must have been loud, she vaguely remembered a passing nurse placing a sign outside her door before closing it. Apparently it was something they did. All Rey knew was she wanted to be alone, more alone than she already was.

“ No my dear, you didn’t kill him. You more than anyone else knew how Ben was with his temper, and the rain that, especially up the pass.It was no one’s fault, no one but his own. He drove like an idiot. It could have happened to anyone.”

She could tell even Leia had a hard time believing her words. And yet she said them with no blame, so kindly. As if she really believed Rey was completely innocent.

“ We’d been fighting though, at that damn party. I’d gone by to talk to him, because he wouldn’t answer me. He was avoiding me. And we fought, he doesn’t even understand anything. He would hear me out, he was making assumptions. And it wasn’t until I mentioned Han. But I needed to go. I was just going to let him stew in his own misery for a bit. But he followed me--if I’d just spoken to him. Or answered my phone. I could have told him to pull off.”

---------------------

She hadn’t attended the funeral. Rey was released three days before. Instead she fetched what was left of her life, and with Poe driving headed back to blistering Arizona.

Staying away was simple. At least for a while, until she couldn’t. Demons always had a way of making themselves known. And she couldn’t run away from what had happened and Ben forever.

Of course the weather would be the exact sort she hated when the plane landed, cold and drizzly. The sort that clung to you, damp, unrelentless. Ben’s favorite. Especially if there was a fog.

It took them a bit longer to get off the plane, with an infant, and cripple. Poe’s wheelchair being placed in the back of the plane rather than the front.

“ Just think when I get my Prosthetic--”

“When you get your Prosthetic you wont be fucking useless, this is like having two kids. Come on, there is your wheelchair, hold Brynlee.”

Rey watched as her best friend slid over magically with her three month old daughter, with one arm, she could barely do anything with two, and yet he managed it impeccably, having only one leg.

“ Come on Benny, your mama is in a mood. I think she is nervous. But you shouldn’t be.”

Benny was Poe’s name for Brynlee, whose given name was Brynlee Lynn Organa Solo. Lynn after Poe’s Mother. At first Rey had been livid, but the more he did it, opting to do it quietly, or in the other rooms, or passing, the more she got used to it, and it was a tie to Brynlee’s father. As if her looks weren’t enough.

“ There you are, I’m sorry we are late, oh my.”

Rey knew exactly what Leia meant. Her daughter's firm stare from beneath the dark waves of hair, the bow of her lips when she was concentrating on something, was all her father. She even had his fingers.

“ Yes indeed, she has quite the temper and appetite. Would you like to hold her?”

From the moment her daughter had been brought into the world, with her best friend at her side, three weeks early, Rey had kept her mostly to herself. That emptiness she’d felt when she lost Ben, slowly felt as if it were dissipating. As if pieces of herself were being woven back together. As if somehow through their daughter.It was as if he was with her again. Although she knew she’d never feel complete without him again.

“ Hey kid.”

Rey had become so enthralled in watching Leia with her granddaughter, her fascination making it obvious she too was feeling much of what Rey often felt, and saw. That she hadn’t noticed the approach of Ben’s dad until his frame loomed over her, pulling her into a one sided hug, tucking her into his frame.

Han wasn’t as tall as his son, but he was by no means short in stature, tall enough to provide the relief Rey needed in that moment.

“How are you feeling? Is--”

“ It’s good, it’s good. I’m still taking it easy. It’s weird some days. Like some days I’ll be in the shop working on the Falcon, and it’s like I can just feel him more with it you know. Or does that sound weird. I am getting old, you know.”

She knew it would happen, the topic would be approached, the flood gates would open, the tears would be shed. But she didn’t think it would happen in the middle of Seatac airport. And certainly not because the discussion of the donation of Ben’s heart to his Father.

“ Can I hear it? Please--I just.”

“ Come here kid.”

“You know if you press your nose like this and stare really hard you look like a cyclops.”

He had to be high, she was sure of it. Hux always used him as the guinea pig, and with his sheer size he felt the need to eat the entire whatever the fuck it was Hux was testing. And it never ended well. Never. It was the only logical reason. And now his face was pressed so tightly to her own she couldn’t breathe. And he was laughing the most hideous laugh she’d ever heard.

“ Thank you? I think.”

She couldn’t get much out of him, a hum before a fit of laughter again, and then just like that he was serious again.

“ I liked the cyclops things, you know like in where the wild things are. That was one of my favorite books when I was little. Dad was the one I actually made read it to me nonstop. I think he finally hid it.”

She could only shrug her shoulders, her head shaking gently as she watched him lift his head, his fuzzy gaze taking her in as if to see if she were simply joking.

“ Wait, you don’t know where the wild things are?”

“ Not everyone gets goodnight stories Ben.”

Her past wasn’t something they often got into unless Ben pried. And it usually ended in argument, which was why she avoided it. She often tried to justify bad behavior, and why she was the way she was, and Ben wouldn’t stand for it, especially when it caused her to act a certain way towards him.

“ So what did you have? Didn’t you have something you liked like that?”

“ Yes, I had a stuffed bear, and I’m sure at some point it talked, but no one would replace it’s batteries. So when you pressed its hand the sound sounded like a heartbeat. And at night I’d lay with it and press it. It made me feel safe.”

Ben had never experienced such things that Rey had gone through. Of course his parents had been busy with work. So often he’d get taken to his Uncle Luke, whom he’d been close to until they had a falling out. And then there was the nannies. It was his parents' lack of presence that finally sent him out on his own at 17, as soon as he graduated. While he stayed in the state, he refused to have many interactions other than the ones that were obligatory. Not until his parents accepted fault and their wrong doing, without excuse.

“It got taken away, and I’m assuming it was thrown out. I was told I was too old. And that was that.”

Rey could see his face clearly, even with her eyes closed. Her arms wrapped tightly around Han, who she’d hugged plenty of times in the past at family gatherings. Knowing exactly what his heartbeat sounded like, and the one she currently was hearing was not that. It was Ben’s.

And she later learned there were no Cyclops things in Where the wild things are.

“ That is why you always fall asleep with your head on my chest.”

She wiped her eyes quickly, her fingers pressing against Han’s chest as she released a shaky breath. Part of her having a hard time wrapping around the fact she’d just heard the heartbeat of someone she’d thought was gone forever. A heartbeat she’d longed to hear for the rest of her life.

“ I know kid, I know. Lets get home.”

Rey opted to sleep the entire drive, taking one of the proffered anxiety pills that had been prescribed and collected per Leia. Leia sat in the back with Brynlee nestled tightly and safely between them, sleeping peacefully, while Poe chatted with Han from the front.

It was dark by the time they reached the house, and the rain had  begun to pick up. And for a solid five minutes Rey stood in the doorway of the house, listening, and waiting, wondering if she’d made a mistake.

The house was too quiet, Rey kept expecting Ben to jump out from the corner scaring her half to death, causing her to drop her coffee, or throw him a punch.

It wasn’t until she’d gotten Brynlee to sleep that she finally had a moment. Changing, and sitting in the living room, surrounded by so many things that were him. And what should have been overwhelming for the first time was comforting. Seeing so much of him.

Rey found Ben’s parents chatting with Poe, as she expected, dropping into the space her friend had made, handing him the baby monitor, signaling he was on baby duty, minus feedings. Removing her glasses to wipe the gritty feeling from her eyes and buy her more time, Rey finally settled in her place.

“ I want to tell you what happened.”

There was a shift in the atmosphere, a tangible one. And for a moment it set Rey on edge, making her wonder if she was picking the wrong time, or if she were making a mistake. But was there ever a right time?

And if she were going to be living at the Solo’s until she got a place of her own, and moving back wouldn’t it be best to get it off her chest right from the get go?

“ I need you to know.”

“ Rey, we’ve never once questioned, or thought--”

But she wouldn’t hear any of it. They deserved the truth. The truth their son wouldn’t hear. She wouldn’t be silenced again. She didn’t want anyone else thinking differently of her.

“ I didn’t help my mother. I didn’t break my word. He told me if I helped her again we were done. She was sober, and one of the times she was sober before she’d told me one of her case workers was diagnosed with cancer, that they had an amazing Oncologist. That doctor specialized in certain things. I only called her and spoke with her because I needed that information. Leia...Han. Other than Ben, Poe is the only family I had.”

“ You had us Kid…”

Han’s words tore through her like a molten blade, hot and leaving her raw, and for the first time since the accident, it left her feeling as if she couldn’t breathe.

“ Yes, but Ben was making it very clear there would be consequences if I continued to have contact with my Mother, she was causing issues in our relationship. But this time it wasn’t that sort of interaction, but he wouldn’t even listen to me. But in his respect she did fall off the wagon 3 weeks later. But I just needed the doctor's name, for Poe’s leg.”

“ Yea, might not be alive now if it wasn’t for that doctor. Not only was he amazing, but the cost. I’d never have been able to afford it, and that is with my wheelchair, they’ll pay for a prosthetic if I want one, and car modifications.

Rey was thankful for Poe’s chime in, although she was quite sure it was unnecessary, she knew Ben’s parents didn’t need nor necessarily want a play by play as to what took place. They more than anyone knew their son’s temper and what he was capable of.

It was Leia who collected Rey, followed by Han as he ushered them towards the room.

She stilled at the doorway, she’d slept in the room nearly as many times as her own at one point. And if she breathed deeply enough it was like she could smell him there, a notion she knew was crazy.Not with the way Leia was about cleaning. But the more she stood rooted, the more it permeated around her. Making her feel crazy.

“There is a box, well boxes. In the closet. We thought you’d like to go through it”

So that was it, she wasn’t crazy. And perhaps Leia wasn’t attuned to it the way she was, her head nodding as her legs magnetically seemed to draw towards where she’d been directed.

A sound behind her signaled perhaps Leia had wanted to say more, before Han had ushered her out, opting to check on Benny from what Rey could guess, and join Poe once more. There were more than a few boxes, each one marked with his name. But it wouldn’t be hard to figure what was what. Her arms straining to reach the top one, Leia ever the logical one, and Rey had been right, it was the one she’d wanted, the touch of fabric greeting her fingers at the handles nearly causing her to drop the box.

Setting the box on the bed, Rey closed the bedroom door with a quiet click. Before moving towards her favorite window. Their window. Flashes of moments with Ben playing behind her eyes as she grasped the box settling on the floor. She wanted no other distractions. Just this.

She was surprised to find his pants on top, the order making no sense to her, but as she unfolded the clean fold of the heavy material she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold the tears in long, not when remembered the last time she’d seen this exact pair, draped sloppily over her corner chair, the one that she hunched over to study in the earliest hours of the morning.

“ Ben--your pants please.”

She could hear the thundering footsteps, most likely in their kitchen, followed by the giggled that he saved for when he knew he was going to annoy her.

“ No, they’re fine. You worry about too many things Rey. Just live a little.”

His words, had done their job, because she now stood before him.And just the sight of him in his work shirt and underwear and stupid beanie made her a little less annoyed. Especially when he looked at her the way he was.

“ Ben you’re a nightmare. Pick up your fucking pants.Please, because there will be another pair on top of their friends tomorrow and--”

“ And you are too uptight, and isn’t that what I have you for? And to make sure I don’t starve.”

He was lucky she was shoe less that day, an entire mouthful of milk falling from his mouth and onto her shoulder, making her gag. But it didn’t stop him. It never did, instead he simply shoved another spoonful of the disgusting matter before pressing his lips to hers firmly, pulling away only to chew twice and swallow.

“ You won’t ever get rid of me, remember. That feeling. You and me.”

She could only nod, untangling herself from him, unable to take him seriously when he spoke like that. The intensity shaking her to her core. And in the next moment, he was swatting her in the bottom with an old piece of mail. Another thing he promised to take care of, and forgot.

“ Hey Rey--I love you.”

His words stopped her retreat. They weren’t said often, and the fact he’d stopped grazing on his awful bowl of cereal, his voice so soft she actually had to focus or she wouldn’t have heard it, she knew he meant it.

“ I know--”

She always felt sometimes she should have said more, she often professed her love, and they’d decided there wasn’t a need to reply to it every time it was said, there were moments like this, in which sometimes it needed to be one sided.

“ Ben--put your fucking pants away though.”

The simplicity of words after such a moment was worth hearing his laughter again, although the combination between it and his eating is what nightmares were made of, and in the end she put the pants away. And as she held them, she was thankful Leia kept them. But knowing Leia she kept everything.

It didn’t take her long to find it, and she didn’t look at it at all, he had three, one being the one he’d worn *that* night, but it had been very clear, that had been the newer of the set. The one she fetched out was the oldest, torn in one spot, stretched out, and soft. And every fiber of it smelled like him, and she slipped it over her head, feeling the sleeves reach past her finger tips for a single moment it felt as if he was holding her.

There was no concept of time as she sat at the window, a soft knock interrupting her thoughts, Poe sliding through the door on his crutches, face softening at the sight of his friend. “ Lets get you to bed kiddo. Want me to fold these up?”

A wave of panic rolled through her, causing her to jump up from her place, grabbing the pants and few other items that had gathered around her.

“ Okay kiddo, no worries. I get it. You don’t want it smelling like anyone else. I was like that when my mom died. But when you’re done, I’ll tuck you in okay? And before you worry, Han fed Benny, she’s all sorted. Used some of the milk you pumped. So for tonight just rest. Please Rey, if not for anyone else, Benny included, for Ben. You know it’s what he’d want.”

That was the downside to Poe Dameron, he was one of the most entertaining people she knew, he was ravishingly handsome. And many a time Ben thought there had been an interest beyond friendship, until he himself had taken the time to get to know Poe and then he said in his own stoic glory. “ I totally get it.” Because that was Poe. But the thing that annoyed Rey the most, was his way of being right.

So often he was happy and go lucky, she supposed having cancer and later losing a leg to it did that to a person. But he also had a seriousness that he approached with sheer positivity. If he knew he wasn’t right, he didn’t push at it, he might mention it but that was all that would come of it.

Unlike Ben who would argue the sky was green if need be.

But Poe was right, if there was a heaven or whatever, and they really did look over you from above. Perhaps Rey should ask Leia what Jewish believed, but then she could hear Ben rattling on about how she isn’t even really Jewish. Only when she sees fit. Holidays, and the naming of children. Or child in his case. 

Another conversation that had lead to endless laughter and the promise if they had children they’d absolutely not name their children anything biblical, simplify because Ben knew it would send Leia into fits, a bit of a fuck you for making his childhood rough. He wanted something modern, but not too fussy. And if they had a girl and fuck him if they did, somewhat girly. But nothing fucking stupid like Fanny, as he heard those names were making a comeback.

But Rey knew if there were such a thing, Poe was right. Ben would have wanted her to take care of herself, and this entire process, returning back to Seattle, making it home again, forgiving herself, that was going to be hard enough.

The morning was quiet, a soft rain, or drizzle as she learned they like to call it here fell softly outside. The smell of coffee lulled her to the kitchen, but the ache in her chest let her know there were other matters that needed to be dealt with first.

She wasn’t surprised to see Han in the kitchen, Benny tucked contently in his arms, her eyes, another thing inherited from her father gazing intently at her grandfather as he walked and poured cream into the cup before him, sliding it across the counter.

“ Who do you think taught him to make a proper cup? And I think this little lady is ready for her breakfast. Go take my chair, I can sit in Leia's. She went to the market.”

Han let Rey get settled, both herself, and Benny before taking a seat in the other chair, his finger reaching out. “ So you found the stuff. I told Leia you might like it. She wasn’t sure. She wanted to donate it at first. But I told her you might like it for something. There are somethings in there, perhaps we can cut them to make a blanket for Benny. I don’t know that might be silly I’ve just seen--”

“ No it’s perfect, thank you Han. For everything. I know this isn’t easy.”

“ You loved him Rey. Probably more than any of us. Hear me out please. You’ve always come here and seen us, and we’ve loved that. We knew you were it for him. And before you argue that you weren’t together when all this happened, none of that matters my son is pigheaded. He gets it from me, well and his mother, but don’t tell her I said that. You were it for him. I know that soulmate gibberish he talked about. But what you don’t know is it’s because that is what I believe, he probably heard it from me.”

Rey could only imagine what her face must have looked like, and she must have been surprised because she heard Benny make a noise, meaning she’d pressed her into her a bit, but she’d been so blindsided by the omission. Han Solo foul mouth, and dry humor extraordinaire, romantic and believed in soul mates.

“Did you know Leia and I weren’t together when she got pregnant with Ben? Bet he didn’t tell you that. Or that she was dating someone when I first saw her, not met her, saw her. And it felt like someone electrocuted my feet, and I walked up to her and told her she was going to be my woman one day. She tossed a drink at me and called me a neanderthal. But I genuinely felt it in my soul. It was out of nowhere, and we’d been sitting two tables away for hours.”

It was weird, hearing the parallels. Even weirder hearing the soft side of Han, but now that she looked deeper, having seen her with her daughter, *their* daughter, someone so reflective of the man they both loved, and had lost, it made perfect sense.

The shuffle in his pocket didn’t go unnoticed, although whatever she’d expected him to produce certain wasn’t what he held. It was in better condition that she’d expected. Considering it held no case, something Ben griped her for endlessly. The sticker of the shop he worked for still somewhat holding it place firmly, although its corners were beginning to pull and fold. Like the petals of a wilting flower, fitting given the circumstances.

“ There is something on there. You can call the company it turns out, and they can save it permanently. I figured you’d want it. Perhaps take it to the Hollow.”

Of course he’d be there, the trek was a bit of a hassle, and how Han had made it after a heart replacement, she’d never know. But then of course he would, if he died making his way to his son’s final resting place she knew he’d have left content.

“ You know he was a weird kid, always running up there to talk to his Grandpa, they’re buried next to one another.And old Chewie.  Get bundled, I’m sure that ugly plaid jacket of his is in that box too, I’ll watch the Princess. What you say kiddo? Hang out with Pop-pop?”

The phone felt hot in her hand as she clutched it, tucking it away so she wouldn’t be tempted by it. She dressed quickly, her fingers throwing her hair that she’d grown after the accident into a plait in record time. An old pair of jeans and T-shirt before throwing the Old Black sweater overhead. Han had been right, the eyesore of a jack lay folded neatly in a second box, along with one of Ben’s rattier beanies. “ The perfect lumberjack.” He’d have called her.

With one last check to be sure everything needed for Benny was present, and a reassurance from Poe, Rey headed up the trail behind the Solo’s property. Their homestead sat on 200 acres, most of it undeveloped forest, including its very own small stream and what could have been called a waterfall, because of course it did.

It was so perfectly simplistic, it nearly looked as if it came from a time well before they ever existed, and perfectly Ben.

*Benjamin Organa Solo*

*Beloved Son*

*Father*

*Soulmate to Rey*

*November 19, 1993 - January 15,2018*

two souls are sometimes created together    And in love before they’re even born

                                 f.scott fitzgerald

She hadn’t expected it, the star of David of course was a bit of an overkill, and it was probably good that Ben wasn’t around to see it, but it was a good distraction, but Ben would have been horrified, and knowing that and hearing his voice in her head, it made Rey laugh.

She sat on the mossy dirt, the rain having slowed to a light but chilled drizzle. The phone felt like a brick in  her pocket. But she knew what she had to do, it was the only way she’d get any closure, if this could be called that. But her anxiety was through the roof.

It appeared Han, or Leia had taken the initiative and charged the phone for her. The homescreen screamed at her, of better times. A picture she hated, but Ben insisted on, but of course he would, it was mostly him, his arm wrapped around her tightly, her eyes pinched closed as his face took up most of the screen his tongue nearly touching his chin as he refused to take a proper picture, in protest of her requests to look like a normal couple. And to infuriate her more he set it to her screen shoving the phone back at her his tone petulant as he tugged her further down the pier.

“ There, we don’t need some typical picture to prove we are a couple Rey, I’ve been inside you 50 million ways, besides this is far better than any cliche picture we could have taken, I can see your freckles, and you can see proof I no longer have tonsils, and that my parents should really have invested in braces, cheap fucks.”

Her passcode was the last step to whatever Ben had to say, his last words. To her at least. And part of her didn’t want to know, but then again she wasn’t sure if their exchange at the party was what she wanted to remember as their last moments together.

It made her wonder, did he know? Did he have any sort of inkling of what was to come?

Her finger hovered, but only momentarily, because she knew if she waited anymore she wouldn’t follow through.

It was static at first, and then she heard it, muffled, but there, rich and quiet, even behind the slap of the rain as it beat violently against the windshield.

“Rey--it’s me. But you know that. Please, pickup the phone. I know you won't, you’ve probably flipped your phone over, or tossed it in the back, and it makes me hate you that you wouldn’t let me install one of those smart stereos, the one with the bluetooth, and navigation. Because you are horrible at navigation, and then you’d have to see my phone calls, and it would disrupt you. But anyways.”

Even in the middle of a fight, Ben knew how to be somewhat humorous and she wasn’t sure if that made it worse, or better.

“Look, I’m sorry. And if you’d just answer your phone, perhaps we could pull off, have a romp? I’m sorry that was crude and I was kidding, unless you know you wanted to. But no really, we can get coffee. I wasn’t fair to you. And it’s obvious we have things to discuss, just please answer me. And Rey--”

She could hear the pause, the skid of his tires, through the other line, and for a moment she was sure the call would drop, hoped it would, because she couldn’t bear hearing it.

“ Rey--I love you. I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”

The phone call dropped, and she wasn’t sure if he knew what was happening, the way his voice sounded, the change in his breathing said perhaps he did, perhaps it had indeed happened and he’d saved her from hearing it. She wouldn’t doubt it. He’d always been somewhat of her White Knight.

But in the end, she couldn't help but be relieved, their last exchange wasn’t completely that of anger. He loved her. Despite it all, even in the end. She knew he knew. He always had been good at reading her, she’d been nothing but an open book from the moment she met him. And it was no different in the end. Even if she hadn’t gotten the chance to tell him. She knew he knew. And that gave her a bit of peace.

“ I miss you so much.”

The trek back to the house left her feeling heavy. But the emptiness had somewhat lifted. And when she reached the living room, she was somewhat surprised to see Han and Benny in the same place she left them, as if a pause button had been pressed. The only thing that had changed was the fire that had been started.

“ Hey kid, better?”

It was the first time Rey realized she had placed the phone back in its hiding place, her hand rotating it towards Han.

“ Yes, Better.”

[thegreenfairy13]

No Country For Heroes (Part 10)

Plot: the GCPD turns Jim in for Oswald’s protection. Oswald takes the opportunity to bend the detective to his will. 

Features torture, mind control and dub con. Originally written for the prompt ‘beg’ by the wonderful @justsimplymeagain. Has already been finished but @whomerlockwood pointed out some obvious flaws for which I’m very grateful!

Read the entire story here.

Chapter 10 - Be Good: 

Jim doesn’t struggle. Not when Oswald forces him into the chair, not when he fastens his bindings, not when he pushes the helmet onto his head. His breathing is ragged, uneven. He desperately gulps for air, tries getting some oxygen into his lungs, doesn’t even notice how he’s hyperventilating.

“Please,” he stutters once he gets at least his tongue to cooperate. “Please,” he repeats weakly. “You don’t have to do this.” Using this hackneyed phrase is pathetic, Jim knows. He knows it’s useless, yet he can’t stop pleading with the gangster. He has no dignity left to lose, there is no self-respect left in him. The only thing Jim knows, is how deeply, truly terrified he is.

“Mercy,” he tries again, reaching out for the other man as good as he can with his bound wrists.

To his utter surprise, Oswald takes his hand in return, squeezes his fingers gently. Their eyes lock, at last, and Jim sees his own pain mirrored perfectly in his torturer’s face.

Oswald is fighting back his own tears, tries to keep his expressions in check, but failing miserably.

“Why?” Jim chokes out for what feels like the hundredth time. He presses back against those pale fingers offered to him, clings to them as if they were a lifeline.

The gangster falls silent except for his own heavy breathing. He struggles to find the right words, opens and closes his mouth silently as he hooks his arms around Jim’s neck.

“I’ve told you,” he whispers against Jim’s temple, nuzzling his hair affectionately.

“But I don’t understand,” the bound man replies, afraid to move in the Penguin’s embrace, lest he’d start the devilish machinery.

“My Jim,” he sighs in response, caressing the blonde’s face lovingly. “I told you, I want to keep you, give you everything you want…” Oswald’s voice breaks off and Jim dares to lean into his touch.

“If I’d let you go now, you’d never return,” he confesses. His hand caresses Jim’s cheeks, his neck, follows the line of his nose. “You’re so beautiful it hurts,” he murmurs as his thumb swipes across Jim’s lips. “Always wanted you,” he states. “Right from the very first moment I saw you. Wanted you more than anything I’ve ever seen before.” His lips tremble as he speaks.

Kneeling down beside him, Oswald stares directly into Jim’s blue eyes. The blonde chases after him, body straining against his bindings when the murderer lets go.

“I can’t let you go now that I finally have you,” Oswald sobs. Wiping his eyes, the mobster merely stares into the distance, seemingly lost in his own thoughts. “I will admit,” he starts, “when they brought you to me, I solely wanted to execute my revenge. I wanted to get back at you for my leg, for leaving me to rot in Arkham, for every time you sought my help only to abandon me the second I gave you what you wanted.”

Oswald leans back against Jim’s leg, squeezes his calf gently. “But then I’ve been in your head.” He looks up, checks whether the man is still listening. Jim has never paid more attention to anything in his entire life.

“And then I understood,” he sighs. “I saw your pain, your losses, your desires. All your thoughts revolve around your beautiful women, your lost child, your father, your failures.” Shaking his head, he presses a chaste kiss against his lover’s leg. “And I knew, if I could give you what you have been searching for all your life, you’d be mine. Truly.” He underlines his point by digging his nails into Jim’s flesh. It should be painful but, in fact, helps Jim to stay grounded.

Outwardly, Oswald looks completely calm, composed, yet Jim sees the feverish glint in his eye and shudders. His captor is completely insane.

Swallowing heavily, Jim clears his throat. Heart hammering frantically in his chest, he chooses his next words, hopes against hope he’ll find the right ones. “You mean a family?” he tries tentatively. Jim feels as if he’s about to pass out.

The mobster blinks in surprise and makes a disgruntled noise in response. “How can a man as smart as you be sometimes so blind?” he scoffs.

Slowly, Oswald gets up. Placing his weight onto Jim’s tighs, he leans into the bound man’s personal space. “This characteristic of yours,” he starts, voice low and threatening, “it makes me want to hurt you, so so bad.”

Jim’s throat feels suddenly very dry.

“On the other hand,” Oswald continues lightly, switching his expressions so swiftly it gives Jim whiplash, “it’s endearing how stubbornly you refuse to accept the reality around you.” He chuckles, clearly bemused. “My mother had this talent too,” he laughs. “Always saw what she wanted to see.”

Taking a step back, the gangster assesses his possession, nods to himself, and smiles. “If I could,” he tells Jim, “I’d never hurt you again.”

“Then don’t,” Jim whispers. “Please don’t.” He feels hot tears welling up again. Something inside him urges him to stay strong, tells him how humiliating it is to appear so weak in front of this man, but Jim can’t find the strength in him to keep up the pretense.

“Jim,” Oswald starts softly, suddenly sincere again. He caresses his face, the touch light as a feather. “I never lied to you,” he tells Jim. “It won’t hurt, my darling, not when you finally come to the right conclusions,” Oswald vows solemnly.

The captured cop barely dares to ask. “What conclusions?”

Oswald bites his lip and there’s a flash in his eyes. Jim is almost certain he’ll hit him again. Instead, he makes himself comfortable in the blonde’s lap, wraps him up in his arms.

The gentle gesture is enough for his tears to start flowing again. At the same time, Jim enjoys the comfort, allows himself the illusion of safety. Inhaling deeply, he lets Oswald’s decadent perfume fill his nostrils and block out the grim reality of his situation. Pale, white fingers are tangled in his hair, massaging his scalp wherever it isn’t covered with the cold metal.

Jim knows Oswald only has to move his hand slightly to the side, push down on one of the buttons on the gruesome thing and the agony will start again.

“Was that really what you wanted?” he urges. “A family? A beautiful wife and a child to care for?” Inhaling deeply, he leans his head against Jim’s.

“I,” the detective’s voice breaks off. Wrecking his head, he remembers all the sessions Oswald forced him to endure, all the memories he dissected. It’s his latest memory, the one he tried keeping hidden best, that jumps back to his mind. His father always knew what to do and say. He never recklessly reject an outstretched hand.

“I wanted to be someone my father could be proud of,” he admits, at last, going for an honest answer but not something the gangster might want to hear.

The man in his lap hums, obviously pleased. The buzz seems to reverberate through Jim’s entire body. It feels warm, pleasant.

“But it turned out, your father wasn’t someone you could be especially proud of,” Oswald quips. His hold tightens. “I saw him. In your head, with Falcone.”

Jim nods. “It should have torn me apart when I found out,” he tells the other man. Closing his eyes, Jim remembers the moment. Momentarily, he feels a wave of disappointment wash over him. All his life, he tried living up to the ideal that had been his father, a mobster’s best friend. The sensation vanishes just as quickly, gives way to calm acceptance.

“But instead you saw us,” Oswald finishes. “What we could be.”

“Yes,” Jim breathes into the flesh against his lips. And it is true. That had been his first real thought: if a man like his father had managed a balance between his ideals and reality, how did he so utterly fail time and time again?

“But you couldn’t,” Oswald finishes for him. “Cause it didn’t fit into this picture you created for yourself when arriving in Gotham all those years ago.”

Mutely, the blonde shakes his head. Pulling back, he seeks Oswald’s face. “I loved them,” he says. “Lee and Barbara. I really did. For a while.”

Oswald hums again in agreement and this time, the buzz seems to be getting louder. It tingles, feels just too good to be true, like a blanket slowly getting pulled over his entire body.

“I really wanted to be a good man,” he continues. “A good husband, a good father,” Jim’s voice trails off.

The buzz is so loud Jim can barely hear his own words. It doesn’t matter if he hears them, though. They are solely for Oswald. The man’s humming echoes through his bones.

“A good man has a wife, a kid,” he elaborates faintly. Closing his eyes, he gives himself over to the buzz. It’s like the world’s loudest lullaby.

“What is it that you really want, James?” Oswald’s voice sounds so very far away, even though Jim knows the man is practically wrapped around him, can still feel his weight in his arms.

“I just wanted to be good ,” he says at last, and all of a sudden, the buzzing stops.

[leviathanlazarus]

No More Distance

Pairing: Danny Wagner x (F) Reader

Word count: 1672

Warnings: none

This is for my dear @jeordinevankiszka <3 It’s loosely based off the romantic plot from the film Lagaan, which I highly recommend you watch. You can watch the scene & listen to the song that inspired this oneshot here. 

You had been waiting for Danny to show up to the loud, extravagantly colorful Indian wedding but he still caught you off guard when he arrived, his tall, built figure cascaded in shiny, deep violet silk. He was still wearing his own necklaces but they were half-hidden beneath the gold-stitched collar of his kurta and he ran his hand through his thick, dark hair, looking around and seemingly unsure of himself. He looked like a prince. 

You looked down at your own dress--well, it was really an anarkali suit--that had taken you months of shopping to find for the wedding. You and Danny could have been matching perfectly if only your dress had been detailed with gold instead of silver, but the brilliant violet hue of the fabric was nearly identical to his. You liked what you were wearing--you really did feel like a princess even if it wasn’t your wedding--but you sort of hoped that Danny was as uncomfortable in the attire as you were. 

The music was loud--the trumpets, sitars and drums vibrating through your ears--and it was made to seem louder by the varied conversations inside the venue, the high ceilings only making the echoes worse. Danny didn’t seem to know you were there yet so you tried to get closer, grabbing a glass of wine and meandering from group to group. You really didn’t know many people there so when Danny had told you he was coming, you had felt an enormous sense of relief. 

But also sadness. You loved Danny. He didn’t love you though. You never had the courage to tell him that you loved him, you just always hoped he somehow knew from the way you looked at him and the way you touched him. You’d always hoped it was obvious. 

You loved Danny desperately--you loved the way that he squeezed your hand when you went to movies together, especially the scary ones; how he always knew what to say to make you feel safe; the way he made you laugh even when there was nothing all that funny happening; how easy he was to talk to and how much he really cared. 

Your heart sank as you watched from across the venue, the wine already growing warm in your hand. Danny was with someone, another young woman dressed in vibrant yellow silk, her hair in one long braid that trailed down her upper back. They were laughing--she put her hand on his arm, he ran his finger down the length of silver on the neckline of her dress. They looked happy together. 

The sight prompted you to swallow the rest of your wine in one go. You felt like you should have expected Danny to be with someone else--why wouldn’t he have a date to a wedding? He was about as close to perfect as any man would ever be. 

The reception then seemed like a total bust. You sat down at a table by yourself and slumped a little, aware that you were being very cliche in your sadness but too sad to do anything else. You sipped at another glass of wine as your eyes searched for Danny again. He caught your gaze and smiled before moving toward you.

You sat up straight, smoothing out the dress and tried not to look so pathetic. 

“Hey,” Danny said, then in front of you, taking it upon himself to slide out the chair next to you and sit down. His face was a little shiny thanks to the increasingly stuffy space and hideously hot August air that provided no relief. He brushed some hair away from his face and you noticed the grey feather earrings--you didn’t know what bird they would be from.

“Hi,” you said. You weren’t sure what to expect. At that point you weren’t even sure what you wanted.

“I was hoping to find you,” Danny said. “I would’ve said hi earlier but I actually missed most of the ceremony.”

“I’m surprised. Usually you’re on time for everything,” you replied, smiling, already feeling your walls being broken down just by him next to you. You didn’t like that--being upset was easier.

Danny smiled back. “I know. I was struggling with the outfit,” he said, glancing down at himself. “What do you think?”

“I love it,” you said, too quickly. “It looks great.”

“Thanks. Yours too. We’re almost matching.”

You felt your cheeks grow hot. “I thought the same thing when I saw you.”

Danny sighed and looked around the room before turning his attention back to you. “You wanna go outside for a minute? Walk around?”

You hesitated but said, “Sure.”

The air outside may have been hot as hell but it was still a relief from being trapped inside the venue. You blinked against the light, the evening sun setting beyond the grassy slopes, as you and Danny walked side by side.

There was more silence until Danny said, “You didn’t bring anyone.”

You felt an ache in your chest. “Was I supposed to?”

Danny shrugged. “I guess I’m just surprised.”

The ache persisted. “Are you?”

“Or were you looking to meet someone here?”

Clearly going outside had been a mistake. What was he getting at? You looked down at the grass beneath your silver slippers. “No, not really. I see you brought someone.”

Danny nodded and his ambivalence only made you hurt more. “Yeah, I did.”

You couldn’t do it. “I hate this,” you declared, stopping in your tracks, and turned to face him.

“Hate what?”

“Whatever this is. The questions. What do you want from me?”

Danny just stared at you.

“During the ceremony I just kept thinking, what if that were us?” You exhaled and kicked a pebble away from you. 

“What do you mean?” Danny finally asked.

You sighed. “You know what I mean.”

“No,” Danny replied slowly. “I need you to say it, Y/N.”

You shook your head. “I’m not gonna say it. I can’t handle it.”

Danny took your hand in his, lacing your fingers together. “What would you have said if I had asked you to be my date?”

He was just being ridiculous then but you still squeezed his hand. “I would’ve said yes, you idiot.”

Danny held your hand to his lips and kissed your knuckles. “Then I should’ve asked you.”

“Why didn’t you?” you asked quietly, watching his eyes return to yours as he lowered your hand.

“I couldn’t handle it either.”

You had nothing to lose then. “Isn’t it obvious how much I love you?” 

A flush of red tinted Danny’s cheeks. “Wasn’t it obvious how much I loved you?” He took your other hand. “Still do.”

You felt your face flush too as your heart thumped in your chest. “You do?”

Danny freed your hands to embrace you, pulling you against his chest with his hand flat against your back as the other reached to stroke your hair. “I love you, Y/N.” 

As he leaned in to kiss you, you turned your head so his lips landed on your hair. “Danny, wait,” you said, hooking your arms around the back of his neck. “Can we dance?”

“I can’t dance,” Danny replied, smiling sheepishly. 

“Neither can I, don’t you remember?”

He laughed. “Okay.”

With the music still reverberating from inside it felt your own personal, distant stage, just the two of you on the grass and the beat vibrating around you. You kept your arms around Danny’s neck as he laid his hands on your waist, taking the lead and having you sway with him. You felt a little awkward--as if your past attempts hadn’t been enough, dancing under the sun at a wedding was enough to make both of you sure: neither of you had much grace.

Still, you moved your hips a little more, gently speeding up and moving your feet, causing Danny to follow your movements. The song ended and a fast-paced dance song commenced and you thought Danny would stop, but he released his hands from your waist and took hold of yours, coercing you to move freely with the music. 

You weren’t quite sure how to move around to the song but you tried, going with instinct, following the beat and letting the jubilance of the song overtake you until Danny himself fueled you. He was following you awkwardly, mimicking some of your hip flicks, and you laughed--really laughed. You threw your head back, your mouth open as the air escaped your lungs, the joy you had wanted for so long finally a reality.

You pulled Danny into you, bumping your hip against his thigh. “You really can’t dance, can you Danny?”

Danny smiled. “I told you.” He touched the silver elephant earrings dangling next to your cheek with his fingertips, his eyes moving from them to your lips, his own lips parting slightly. 

You stroked the feathers hanging from his ears, untangling a few strands of his hair from them and waited for him to look in your eyes again. 

“Will you kiss me now?” you asked and is dark lashes fluttered as he gazed at you. 

Danny nodded and gently took your jaw in his hand, tilting his head down. He pressed his lips to yours so softly that it almost felt like no contact at all until you laid your hand against his chest and he parted his lips again. You reciprocated, letting your lips mesh with his, your fingers trailing down the silk that covered him.

Your heart quivered as did your hands against him--you had waited a long time for that kiss.

For the first time, you truly saw the admiration and love you had craved in Danny’s eyes when he broke away. “My life would be nothing without you,” he said, running his fingers through your hair.

“I don’t ever want to be without you,” you said, clasping his hands. “I don’t want anymore distance between us.”

Danny smiled. “No more distance,” he agreed and kissed you once more, sending your heart fluttering all over again. 

[mutemwija]

Yugioh Advent - Day 13: Whimsical

Summary: On the day his father dies, only his best friend manages to comfort the new pharaoh - in his own magical way

I hope there are not too many mistakes in this, I wrote it in one sitting^^; Anyway I'd be very pleased to know if you enjoyed it :)

@siosiri​ This contains so much of your favorite things that I can’t help but dedicate it to you! 💕

Read here or under the cut 🌟

Mahad watched him with constantly growing concern.

He was barely able to keep himself upright with exhaustion and his red, swollen eyes stood out against his ashen skin – he looked like a walking corpse. It was obvious that he’d been crying, that he was broken-hearted and not at all ready for this but the way his uncle clenched his shoulder made it clear why the prince was standing here at all, that he didn’t approve of his emotions at all and Mahad could feel anger boiling up in his chest.

Whether he was a prince or not, the new pharaoh, the living personification of Horus himself, he was still only a boy who’d just lost his father. He shouldn’t be here, he deserved to be sad and mourn his loss but Aknadin had insisted on announcing their king’s death and proclaiming his successor now, although Aknamkanon’s body was still slightly warm.

At least the ceremony wasn’t long and when the priests and court members were finally relieved of their duty, Mahad stayed behind until everybody else has left the room.

His new king exhaled then and slumped languidly down on the throne that seemed a little too huge for him, too unbefitting and made him look even more out of place in this room than he should have looked.

“My prince…” Mahad spoke up softly but Atem didn’t even react to his voice and just kept staring at some point on the ground.

Taking a deep breath, Mahad walked over to him and slowly bent down on one knee next to him, refraining from putting a hand on his leg, so as to not to startle him more than necessary. When Atem wouldn’t meet his eyes, he cocked his head to the side in search of those beautiful amethysts. “Atem…” the whispering of his name finally made him look up. Despite that they were friends for as long as Mahad could remember he didn’t use his name very often these days. It was an intimacy he tried to avoid, not because he didn’t want to call him by his name but because his position and duty of loyalty demanded his respect. But now, he wasn’t his prince or Horus incarnate, he was his best friend that was in need of comfort. “Is there anything I can do for you, Atem? Do you want to talk?”

A moment of silence passed but then Atem shook his head.

“No…” he murmured, his voice still shaky but a soft shimmer of determination returned to his eyes and Mahad knew what he was about to say next. “I don’t.”

The words Are you sure? danced on his tongue but Mahad swallowed them down thickly and nodded instead. “If that’s what you wish…”

“Yes. Please leave me alone.”

Mahad grit his teeth but did as he was told and rose to his feet.

Atem watched him leave the room and thought about calling out to him until he could no longer see him. In truth, he didn’t really want to be alone but he couldn’t bear any company either. Privacy was something he longed for on busy days in the palace but loneliness was something he never wanted to feel.

And yet here he was. A juvenile orphan, expected to be king of Egypt.

Just how in Ra’s name should he see fit to that? Only few thought he was ready for the task, the others were probably already plotting to get rid of him before his father had even been buried.

If he wanted to rule the country, to change it for the better if possible, he needed support. He knew it. And yet he had just sent his most loyal servant and friend away. Surely, Mahad would understand but it still felt weird to him, wrong even. He needed to apologize as soon as he could, he just… he felt so tired, like he had spent all his energy fighting for and crying over his father.

A sound reverberated through the columned hall that caught his attention. It was just the softest meow but he’d heard his favorite animal’s sound every time, not matter how far or gentle it was. So he wasn’t surprised that when he looked up he saw a light brown and black colored cat crawling up behind one of the pillars at the far end of the room.

Atem looked at her and she stopped in her movement altogether, ducking her head behind the pillar, in an attempt to escape his eyes. Indeed it took her some time until she reemerged and when she noticed Atem was still looking at her, she meowed softly again. There was something appalled in her tone, as if she was miffed by his staring.

With her head and tail held high she strutted diagonally across the room, closer to where Atem was sitting on the throne. He decided on remaining still and simply watching how and where she moved.  

What a whimsical creature this was!

One moment she was shying away from his glance, the next she was demanding it. Her fur seemed to glow like fire in the setting sun and her eyes were greener than every plant he had ever seen.

And was she actually trying to crawl up the pillars or just scratching her claws at them? How did she even manage to get in here? And what did she hope to find? There were no mice in the palace she could devour, his uncle made sure of that. Despite him his uncle didn’t approve of cats in any way. If it wasn’t blasphemy against the great Bastet you could even say he hated them. And Atem and always wanted one, or two but his uncle had made sure to convince his father that he would just play with them all day, instead of paying attention to his tutors.

His father… He was just a couple of rooms away, slowly but surely turning cold and Atem couldn’t still believe that he was on his way to Osiris now.

The cat’s loud meow brought him back from his thoughts and he watched with incredulous fascination as she made her way through the room, softly and slowly sneaking up to him, until she stopped at the exact place, Mahad had just been a few moments ago.  There she meowed again, now apparently offended that he didn’t pay attention to her anymore.

He wanted to move to see if she would let him pick her up but he still felt too heavy and tired to move. The cat cocked her tiny head to the side, challenging him silently but all Atem managed was a fleeting smile.

For a moment she just stared at him but then she moved and sneaked up the last inches to his legs, tapping his shin with her tiny paw and a meow.

Atem looked at her, how small she was but how strong she seemed and his heart beat heavy in his chest from sadness and realization of his burden. He could feel it weighing him down and stealing his confidence with every breath he took and he had to shut his eyes against his rising panic.

When he opened them again after a few deep breaths, the cat was gone. He furrowed his brows and looked to his left in hope to find her but it seemed she was gone indeed. Or maybe she had only been a creature of his imagination from the very start. A sigh escaped him and he put his head into his hand, feeling like he would fall asleep at any moment.

Suddenly something landed in his lap and he jumped up so abruptly, he nearly fell from the throne. An almost amused meow reached his ears then and he saw the cat nearly batting her eyes at him. After he’d regained his balance completely he picked her up and shook her affectionately.

“You’re a wicked one, aren’t you?” The cat just continued looking innocently at him and this time Atem really managed to give a soft chuckle. He put her down in his lap where she rolled herself together immediately, licked her paw and twitched her ears and Atem couldn’t help but slowly, gently pet her. It didn’t take her long to start purring under his touch and a soft smile came to his face at the soothing sound. “I wonder how you got in here… Though I guess, your kind always finds a way to get what you want, right?” The cat’s ears twitched again and Atem adjusted his position until he was able to pet her with both hands. “You’re so small and moving so smoothly, you can’t be very old… But you certainly seem experienced in sneaking up on people. Your mom taught you well, I suppose. Or your father… Mine did too, you know. He taught me perseverance and strength and gentleness, too. He was a good man, benign and brave at the same time. A good ruler and a great example for the people and for me. Maybe too good to ever step out of his shadow…”

At that the cat raked her head around, her ears twitching again and with a look in her eyes that seemed to judge him silently.

“You don’t agree, huh.” Atem took a deep breath and suddenly but slowly another realization crept up from his still heavy beating heart through his whole body and he could taste another kind of determination on his tongue. “You’re right…” He told the cat that held him captive with those bright green eyes, as if she tried to plant confidence into his body. “No one says I have to walk behind him all my life. If I just take one step aside, I can leave his shadow and find and go my own way in Ra’s light.”

A loud meow and a tap with a paw was what Atem received for his words before the cat jumped down his lap. Atem moved to reach out for her but a thick, heavy smoke started to build around her and in the next moment the cat was gone, replaced by none other than his best friend.

“Mahad!” The magician turned around and instantly bent down on his knee again, thus shielding his face from Atem’s view but he knew his friend was smiling proudly anyway. “I didn’t know magicians were able to do this… Transform themselves into animals, I mean. .”

“One can always surpass one’s ancestors, my prince. It’s only a matter of diligence and heart.” Mahad looked up and Atem was caught in his piercing glance. “And you have both, Atem.”

His mouth ran dry and his heart leapt into throat at the faith that his best friend bestowed on him. He could laugh at himself if he wasn’t so mixed up. There really was no need to feel as uncomfortable and weak and he did when he had friends and confidants like Mahad.

Again, he adjusted his position and this time straightened his back, set his legs firmly on the ground and held his head high until Mahad wondered how he could ever think he looked out of place in this throne, his throne.

“Thank you, Mahad.” Atem nodded his head with the royal posture he was born with. “For your friendship and council.”

The magician nodded his head again but held the other’s gaze. “Always, my prince.” He confirmed and was glad to see Atem smiling at him. Mahad smiled back a last time before he got up and then nodded his head to the door. “After you’ve rested…” Atem opened his mouth to protest but Mahad held up his hand to stop him and spoke with more vehemence. “After you’ve rested, my prince you are very welcome to keep Mana and me company at her training lessons. Whenever you feel like it, of course.”

Atem still had this assuaged, soft smile on his lips as he nodded his head in gratitude. “I still have to… organize some details of my father’s burial but I will be glad to join you as soon as I am rested.” He stressed his last two words and Mahad gave him an approving nod.

They looked at each other for a moment longer, both smiling softly but with a different sort of affection. Mahad was the first to break the contact as he bowed his head slightly once more, then turned and walked out of the room as sneakily as that cat that had helped Atem regain his confidence just a few minutes before.

Atem knew he'd never find a more loyal friend.

[builder051]

Titan A.E. SickFic

So, it would probably be sufficient to just say here’s the movie/fandom I’m writing for and the scene I’m expanding on, but I’m way more verbose than that.  This is a story for Titan A.E., and the scene is the one where Akima gets shot during the escape from the Valkyrie, then gets patched up on the New Bangkok drifter colony, right up to the Over My Head sequence.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the movie, I highly recommend watching it.  It’s fantastic.  (Matt Damon and Drew Barrymore do the voices.)  But, because I’m anxious nobody’s going to understand this, here’s a (hopefully) brief summary:

In the future (year 3000-ish), Earth is threatened by aliens (called the Drej [pronounced dredge]).  The planet is blown up, and people live on these drifter colonies in space.  A guy named Cale (approx. age 20) has a map left behind by his father that shows the location of the Titan, a spaceship/project that can be used to create a new Earth.  Joseph Korso and his crew, including a young woman named Akima (aboutCale’s age), are mentoring Cale and helping him find the Titan.  Cale and Akima have a bit of a budding romance.  Things go south when there’s suspicion Korso is actually out to sell the Titan, and Cale and Akima try to escape Korso’s ship.  Akima’s shot in the shoulder, and she and Cale end up on a drifter colony to get medical help.  (That’s just the plot up to where this story starts up; there’s a lot more movie left.  I won’t spoil it for you.)

Warnings for existence/discussion of violence, wounded people, slight medical talk, possible underage drinking that doesn’t actually happen, and emeto.  I’m also going to paraphrase/mess up/rearrange dialogue from the movie, plus add swearing because I can’t resist the opportunity.

***

Cale doesn’t have time to look down.  He needs to get her to safety, to someone who can help.  He can’t stand here, gazing into her deathly pale face and anxiously searching out life behind her closed eyes.

Akima’s alive.  He knows it with the same surety that he now knows Korso was never a friend.  Like he knows the Titan is doomed to be chopped up and sold as scrounge.  But there’s no time to think about that either. Akima’s alive.  She’s tense in his arms, wrapping her willowy body around itself to protect the injured shoulder that’s currently jammed into Cale’s chest.

“Come on, bring her over here.”  Someone’s inserting cold fingers under his elbow and guiding him away from the bridge, further onto the drifter colony.

Cale suddenly struggles to keep pace with the brisk walk.  Adrenaline still courses through is veins, but with the lack of an obvious opponent to punch in the face, it’s all hitching breath and heart palpitations.  Cale does his best not to jostle Akima as he carries her.  He feels his heartbeat throbbing through his chest and into hers, then reverberating through her precipitously frail form.

“Ok, yeah,” Cale mutters, somewhat to the growing crowd of helpful and curious drifters, but mostly toAkima.

There’s an explosion of English and Thai chatter all around.  Cale’s brain feels like it’s fogging up from the inside, and he’s not sure who to focus on, or who’s even addressing him.  “Lay her down here.”

An older woman in a straw hat seems to be taking charge, pointing people in various directions.  Her wizened hand pushes Cale to bow forward and hover Akima over a bench.  “Whoah, hold on,” Cale says. Akima’s groaning in his arms, and he’s not ready to release her onto the hard surface.

“Get blankets,” The woman is barking out.  “And cold liquor.”

“Wait, what’s that for?” Cale asks in a mixture of confusion and panic.  He thinks of ancient, stinging wound-washes, and Akima’s pain-streaked voice replays in his ears.  Drifter colonies aren’t known for holding the latest tech, but they have to have medical staff, healing instruments, probes at the very least.

He keeps a sturdy grip around Akima’s torso and under her knees until the older woman shakes open a dingy grey blanket and directs a couple of men in coveralls to manhandle the wounded girl down onto it.

“Not for her,” the woman says.  The peak of the woman’s pointed hat comes up a few inches below Cale’schin as she reaches for his hands.  It’s only now that Cale realizes they’re shaking badly.  “For you, boy.”

“No, no, I don’t need…”  He feels drunk already.  Without Akima’s weight holding him to the ground, gravity seems to be losing hold on Cale.  His brain is floating untethered in his skull, and his stomach is edging upward toward his chest.

More people are bending over Akima.  One of them is dressed in a white coat.  A human doctor.  Calebreathes a sigh of relief, then blinks hard.  Two doctors.  No, four doctors.  He blinks again and sees only one.  Cale shakes his head, releasing a wave of pent up vertigo cascading down from his hairline.

Akima’s being lifted again, then carried down a hallway.  Just before she turns a corner and disappears, she locks eyes with Cale across the drifter colony’s cavernous room.  Her lips part, and she might be trying to whisper something, but she’s more than too far away for Cale to hear.

“Hey,” he murmurs, taking one step in the direction Akima’s going and stretching out his hand as if to grasp hers across the yards between them.  But then she’s gone.

Cale’s dizzy enough to fall over.  His heart’s still pounding, his breath won’t settle, the smell of rust fills his nose.  He stumbles back a few feet to the colony’s dented, dirty wall and braces his arm against it.  With his forehead in his elbow, Cale examines the toes of his boots, then the swash of dark stickiness across his black shirt.  Akima’s blood.

Unexpected squeamishness sends a river of spit up under Cale’s tongue.  He swallows it frantically, but bile joins the surge, and all there’s time to do is lean forward and hold desperately to the wall as he retches.

It only takes a few heaves to empty his stomach, but fruitless gags keep rising.  “Fuck,” Cale mutters under his breath.  He lightly bounces his forehead against the cold, hard wall.  Heat prickles in from his hands and feet, and the next wave of disgustingness moves in.  He’s going to pass out.

“Oh, fucking Christ,” Cale whispers.  He slides down the wall lets his tailbone hit the floor.  He drops his forehead to his knees and folds his arms over his head.  Cale sighs through the urge to throw up again and wills the sparkles around the edge of his vision to dissipate.

“You sick?”  Cale looks up and almost falls over despite the fact that he’s sitting down.  The woman with the straw hat is back, peering at him from the other side of the puddle of vomit.  She’s clutching a bottle of beer in each hand.

“Um,” Cale says, then swallows hard to force down the urge to spill his nonexistent guts.

“Here.”  She sets the beers on the dusty floor with a clunk that reverberates in Cale’s head, then scampers away again.

A second later, she rematerializes with a mop, and Cale tries not to inhale the scent of stomach acid mixing with bleach as she cleans up after him.  “You don’t have to,” he tries to tell her, but the woman shushes him.

“Just relax a minute,” she says.  Once the floor is cleared, she bends to pat Cale on the back and reclaim one of the beers.  “She’ll be ok.  You’ll be ok,” she whispers with the sort of maternal comfort and understanding Cale hasn’t felt in well over 15 years.

“Yeah,” he breathes back.  “Yeah.”  Cale’s still sighing to himself long after the woman is gone.

He thinks he might be finally finding relaxation when something hits him in the back of the head and bounces off the wall behind him.  The thing comes to stop beside the rattling beer bottle that, by some miracle, hasn’t spilled yet.  The thing hasn’t hit him hard enough to cause any damage, but Cale’s already aching head smarts from the impact.

“Hey,” he snaps hoarsely, scooping up the black-and-white patterned ball and sloppily chucking it back at the embarrassed-looking kid that apparently lobbed it at him in the first place. The kid catches the ball, then cowers behind a tall girl in work coveralls.

“Sorry,” the girl says.  “It’s his favorite thing, you know?”

“Sure,” Cale utters.

“It was our dad’s.  Whenever he’s playing with it, he imagines he’s in a big grass field.  Even though all that’s around here are rusty spaceship parts.”

“Yeah, well.  Gotta…have stuff to keep you going,” Cale replies.  His mind flicks back to Akima.  She has to live.  To be alright.  Because then, even without the Titan, he’ll have…something.  But losing the Titan…

The kids retreat away from him, and Cale tips his head back against the wall and shuts his eyes.  Time passes, though he’s not sure how much because the dull hum of the drifter colony’s engines is beginning to lull him into a sleepy daze.

There’s a soft shuffling, and someone slides down the wall beside him.  Cale peels his eyes open to seeAkima, wrapped in a blanket and perched tiredly at his shoulder.

“How long was I out?” she asks.

“Not long.  Couple hours,” Cale responds, making his best guess.

She eyes the still-untouched bottle of beer sitting on the floor and poses, “You drinking?”

“Naw, more like not drinking,” Cale says with chuckle of distaste for the beverage.  He turns the topic away from himself.  “How are you feeling?”

“I’m ok,” Akima says.  “How are you?  You don’t really look that good.”

“I’m ok,” Cale replies.  His body has calmed down considerably.  There’s just the lingering headache and tremor of exhaustion to contend with now, and it’s truly nothing, at least in comparison to being shot through the shoulder.

“So that rumor about you barfing all over the floor is total falsehood?” Akima raises her eyebrows.  “And you’re ready to help me hunt down a microwave burrito?  I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.”

Cale does feel like he should eat, but just the mention of heavy, greasy food has him shoving down nausea again.  He manages a weak, guilty smile.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” Akima says, returning the smile.  She gracefully steps up to her feet and extends a hand down to Cale.  They stroll down to a bank of windows and fall back into silence.  ThenAkima murmurs, “I’m really sorry.  About the Titan.”

Cale doesn’t look at her.  “I think we still have a chance to find it.”

“How?” Akima asks, attitude edging back into her voice.  “Korso’s got the map.  We have no ship…”

“Oh, we’ve got a ship,” Cale says, his eyes glued to an ancient Phoenix model balanced on top of a trash heap just outside the window.  “Bit of a fixer-upper, but you can fly it, right?”

“Oh, don’t worry, I can fly it,” Akima says with a laugh of bravado.

“Good.  ‘Cause we launch yesterday.”