#this is so wretched I can’t believe what I just wrote byee

[onetimetwotimesthreetimess]

okay malec prompt

this is the most wretched shit I’ve ever written. I’m never forgiving you for this anh. There will be revenge.

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“Sweetheart!! Be careful,” Magnus yells after his daughter as she rushes towards the swing, falling on her way, and then immediately running back again.

Kids are fucking resilient.

“Don’t worry, she’ll be fine.”

Magnus turns and smiles at her, squeezing her hand gently.

It’s a nice evening. The kind of evenings when you just have to get out and have a walk.

He rarely goes on walks anymore, usually commutes through the public transport or his chauffeur.

Walks are overrated anyways.

People can die on sidewalks.

He’s not overreacting. He’s just being realistic.

“Bapak!!” The girl came running towards him and crashes onto his legs. Magnus chuckles softly as his raises his daughter in his arms.

“Hi, peanut,” he kisses her cheek. “Did you have fun?”

“Did!!” The girl yells.

“Come on, time to go home.”

He turns around with his family, making their way over to their car when he hears someone yell his name.

Magnus turns on his heels, raising his brows to see who it is when he notices Simon.

“Simon?”

“Magnus!!” Simon comes running towards him.

“Give me a moment,” he says to the woman next to him and passes his daughter to her.

Simon envelopes Magnus in a crushing hug, and suddenly he feels sixteen again. Laughing and rolling on the soccer field with his friends around him. A time when nothing but love surrounded him.

A time when Magnus was loved like nothing else mattered in the world.

“Sherman, I cannot believe it’s you. It’s been what—“

“11 years. It’s been eleven years,” Simon says. “11 years and 3 months.”

He blinks at the somber tone.

Eleven fucking years.

Eleven fucking years and a life barely lived.

“Bapak?” The small child peaks from the woman’s shoulder and speaks. Her voice a small whisper.

“Bapak?” Simon raises his head. “You’re a dad?”

A wide smile appears on his face, it always does when he thinks of his daughter, the light of his life, the reason why he wakes up every morning.

Magnus takes the child back in his arms and kisses her cheeks, making her giggle in that soft voice of hers.

“Hi, Simon. This is my daughter,” he says proudly, before turning his gaze to the girl and smiling at her. “Baby, this is my very old friend Simon.”

The pigtailed girl gives Simon a beaming smile, waving her hand. “Hi, Simon.”

Simon smiles back, it’s impossible not to, Magnus’s daughter is the cutest thing in the world.

“What’s your name?”

Magnus stills at the words, body freezing as he realises the disaster that’s about to happen. But before he can stop or do anything about it, the girl speaks.

“Alex,” she says proudly, spelling out her name. “A-L-E-X.”

Magnus winces as he sees Simon’s eyes go wide. And also because Magnus knows Simon, the man does not shut up under the worst of circumstances, which he proves in the next few second.

“Alex as in Alexander??” Simon asks baffled, and well, Magnus can’t really blame him.

“Who’s Alexander?” Abigail, his wife standing next to him questions.

He closes his eyes in pain, at the reminder of the name. Of the person who meant—no, means everything to Magnus.

Magnus turns towards her and gives her a tight lipped smile.

“Uh—just a friend. I liked the name.”

Simon scrunches his face, realising the blunder and he opens his mouth to cover up, “I—I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—“

Magnus raises a hand before Simon can fuck this up even more, not that it really is Simon’s fault. “It’s okay Simon. No issues.” He turns towards Abigail and murmurs, “We should leave. It’s Alex’s nap time and she’ll get cranky.”

“Babe, if you want to catch up with your friend, you can. I’ll take her home.”

“Yes, Magnus. We should—” Simon says at the same time that Magnus murmurs, “No, no. We’ll catch up later.”

He hugs Simon and mutters a small apology, promising to call him.

“Bye, bye, Si-Si,” Alex grins.

“Bye Alex,” Simon waves and leaves.

Things are awkward between Magnus and Abigail after that and he laughs inwardly because she doesn’t even know the full truth yet. It’ll be a disaster of mass proposition if or when she finds out.

Abigail can never find out.

He can’t imagine how much it’s going to hurt her and Magnus doesn’t want that. He loves her. He loves her so much and he doesn’t want to see her in pain of finding out his secret.

But eleven years is a long time to keep something like this inside of him, hidden from the world and one day it’s finally out.

Magnus is on a call with Simon, apologising for being aloof the other day and explaining everything.

“Did you really name your kid after your ex?” Simon says surpised.

“Alexander wasn’t an ex,” he snaps.

Alec isn’t an ex. He’s so much more. He’s everything.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—“

Magnus sighs, running his palm over his face. “I’m sorry, Simon. It’s me. I’m being an ass. To you. To my wife. To everyone.”

“Our daughter is named after your ex?” A chilling voice echoes through the room and Magnus can feel the room temperature drop suddenly.

He closes his eyes.

Magnus turns and finds Abigail standing there, her eyes wide. Her beautiful hair falls on her face but she wipes it from her face.

“I—“

The fight that ensues is the worst fight of Magnus’s life.

“How fucking dare you?” Abigail yells, tears streaming through her face.

“Abigail, sweetheart, please listen to me.”

“How could you?”

“It doesn’t mean anything-“ he tries but the lie is as fake as the life he’s been living for the last eleven years.

Devoid of anything.

“He’s the reason, isn’t he?”

“The reason for what?”

“Of everything. Of whatever this stupid marriage is,” she yells.

Magnus goes towards her, touches her shoulder.

“I love you.”

Tears escape her eyes, “But you’re not in love with me.”

“I married you! We have a kid. I just named her after Alexander and I know it’s weird but it’s not that big of a deal,” he tries to explain even though it’s the shittiest excuse.

“How the fuck can you think this is normal. You named our child after some stupid ex—“

And that’s it. That does it for him.

Abigail is mad, understandably so but no one gets to call Alec a stupid ex and Magnus is about to destroy his marriage and his entire life for one little thing that Abigail said in a fit of anger.

“He’s not a stupid ex. He’s the love of my life,” he yells back, his eyes growing wide the second he realises but it’s too late to take back the words.

“I didn’t—“

“Then what am I, Magnus?”

“Abi—“

“Are you cheating on me? Are you seeing him? Where the fuck is—“

“HE’S DEAD!!” Magnus screams. “He’s fucking dead, okay?”

“What?”

“He died eleven years ago in an accident while I was driving the fuxking car, okay? I killed him. I killed my Alec, I—

He falls on the ground, crying for the love he lost, the one that means everything to him and the love that he’s going to lose now.