#this is so clean and simple outside of the groupchat lol

[snickerdoodlles]

5. What’s a fic idea you’ve had that you will never write?

😏😒

i love how u let me torment you with these ideas <3 part of a convo with @bisexualbard-writes and @thewholedamnboulangerie from last night:

bard I’m quietly and with no pressure rooting for a sequel about virgin sacrifice Chay 🤣💖

cookie 😂 I typed that line as a joke, stared at it for a minute, then went "oh no" Chay wearing sheer white with flowers in his hair and makeup done for ✨Maximum Innocence✨ and the world's softest pair of handcuffs he's a virgin sacrifice but he's the world's most perfect pillow princess first

bard The sluttiest, most willing virgin sacrifice Wait stop giving me ideas

emma 👀

cookie 👀✨ Chay has never been more ready in his LIFE Arching and writhing in his bonds, crying out for help, legs conveniently spread or ready to be spread

bard Oh he would haaate for some powerful mysterious being to come and fuck him but then be so enraptured by him that the powerful mysterious being takes him away to a godly palace to be his adored boy toy

cookie truly a horrendous fate for the world's most innocent and bestest boy. how could this have happened to him, how could he have been targeted for this Kim: Chay Chay: wait can you drug me too what'll make me floaty and horny you guys deal that right Kim: CHAY

bard The most innocent and bestest boy!! How could he be ravaged by such brutes! How terrible how unexpected. Why yes his asshole is pre-lubricated but that’s completely unrelated

cookie no no it is related, doesn’t everyone know all virgins have lubed assholes? oh wait they’re mafia brutes ofc they dont read 🙄

bard The body glitter and lip gloss are also unrelated

cookie these are indeed unrelated tho total coincidence

bard Oh of course, my mistake, I forgot that the more innocent and best the boy is the more lubed the asshole

cookie [nods nods] precisely, that's why he's dripping world's most innocent and bestest boy!!!!

bard His thighs are also very fuckable, what with the dripping lube. If anyone was wondering.

cookie his pillow is also very good for supporting his shoulders and propping his head up to fuck his mouth btws. if anyone cares.

[[ writer asks ]]

[venivivividi]

50 QUESTIONS YOU’VE NEVER BEEN ASKED 

tagged by @revengeisalwaysanoption

(sorry I changed the lower case aesthetic on the questions but it was bugging me out lol)

1. What is the color of your hairbrush? Black

2. A food you never eat? Just from a "I don't like it" point of view, almost every type of mushrooms and legumes, but there are a lot of things I can't eat bc my body is weak like that

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold? Well, during winter I'm too warm on public trasportation and too cold outside, during summer I'm almost chilly on public transportation and way too hot outside

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? I was having lunch

5. What is your favorite candy bar? I'm really blanking on this bc I don't  really eat a lot of sweet stuff, but I'd agree that Kinder Bueno was really really good

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports event? No, I have not

7. What is the last thing you said out loud? LMAO it was "Ci sono i fantasmi qui, huh?" ("It seems like we have ghosts in here") and it was a sarcastic remark bc one of my flatmates quickly sneaked in and out of the kitchen very quietly while I was doing the dishes without even say hello. I mean, that seems rude to me but maybe I'm wrong

8. What is your favorite ice cream? I'm a simple gal, I like chocolate, but I also like to pair it with mango, berries or passion fruit. Once I tried salted caramel and it was good.

9. What was the last thing you had to drink? A boring glass of water

10. Do you like your wallet? I guess I do, it's cute

11. What was the last thing you ate? Now I regret doing this right now bc I have to publicly admit that the last thing I ate was.. a formaggino MIO. In my defense, I was still hungry after lunch and I had nothing else! (For those of you who do not know what a formaggino MIO is, it's a type of processed cream cheese very popular here as baby food. I'm pretty sure 98% of italian babies are actually raised on bread&formaggino and pasta&formaggino)

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? I did not. Everything is closed, I have not left my home in forever and I'm not one for online shopping tbh

13. The last sporting event you watched? I think it was some sort of volleyball tournament last December, I'm not sure tho

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? Just salted

15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to? @starkgazing​

16. Ever go camping? No

17. Do you take vitamins? I try every now and then but I honestly forget easily

18. Do you go to church every sunday? No, never actually did

19. Do you have a tan? I have not seen the sun in so long I'm not even sure it's still there

20. Do you prefer chinese food or pizza? This is actually hard because I like pizza but I cannot eat it, and when I tried chinese food it was sooo good and it didn't hurt my body the way pizza does lol

21. Do you drink your soda with a straw? No, but I also very rarely drink soda

22. What color socks do you usually wear? I either go very classic (black, grey and white) or buy the most stupid ones in fucsia with a bear that says *hello*, there's no in between

23. Ever drive above the speed limit? I don't have a license but in general I get very anxious when I'm in a car with someone that drives fast

24. What terrifies you? What does NOT terrify me is the real question. The easy and not deep answer would be spiders

25. Look to your left, what do you see? My bread dough raising under two blankets and a rag

26. Wat chore do you hate? Cleaning the shower in particular but in general the fact that I have to climb over random things to clean half the house bc I'm too short to reach anything

27. What do you think of when you hear an australian accent? I like it! I don't really understand it sometimes, but I like it

28. What’s your favorite soda? I'm always confused by what is considered a soda, but I think that Schweppes lemon counts

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thru? I can ONLY eat seated at a table (and I don't have a car), so i definitely go in

30. Who’s the last person you talked to? My other flatmate (not the ghost one)

31. Favorite cut of beef? I just realised that I actually rarely eat beef if not minced; if we talk about bovine meat, I usually buy veal (the veal sirloin steak is one of the most delicious thing in the world)

32. Last song you listened to? Remedios la bella by Modena City Ramblers

33. Last book you read? I'm trying to read Doktor Živago (It's not going well), the last one I finished was 10 minutes 38 seconds in this strange world by Elif Shafak

34. Favorite day of the week? Probably Saturdays

35. Can you say the alphabet backwards? I tried. No.

36. Do you like your coffee? I was forced to buy a different brand bc I don't want to go to a supermarket far away where I usually buy my fair trade coffee; it's not terrible but it's not my usual strong south american/african/indian blend that is somehow called arabica

37. Favorite pair of shoes? I used to have a great pair of leather combat boots that sadly got destroyed rip

38. At what time do you normally go to bed? I try to be in bed by 11:30 pm and asleep by midnight but I'm not afraid to fall asleep while reading or watching a tv show at 10pm lol or even stay up until 3am

39. At what time do you normally get up? I trained myself to stay in bed until at least 8am now that I don't have anything to attend to in the mornings

40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? Sunsets

41. How many blankets are on your bed? Well, just one where I live now, but back at home in the mountains last winter I had two wool blankets and two duvets (and a fleece blanket ready on the side just in case)

42. Describe your kitchen plates. Boring white. My sister bought them and I'm very disappointed; luckily I have a small plate for dessert in this great shade of dark anthracite grey a friend of mine gifted me a while ago

43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage? I like red wine but if we're talking strong ones, I like tequila

44. Do you play cards? It's a holiday tradition with my family. Things can get scary, believe me

45. What color is your car? I don't have a car

46. Can you change a tire? Nope

47. What is your favorite province? I.. don't have one? (I'm not sure I understand the question tbh)

48. Favorite job you’ve ever had? I loved working in the bio-preparation lab. I was not involved in the actual process but still I felt very badass operating the autoclave and all the other sterilizing machines and going around with a cart full of glassware

49. How did you get your biggest scar? An incadescent flatiron

50. What did you do today that made someone else happy? I sent a stupid video on my family's groupchat, I hope I made someone happy at least lol my sister seemed amused