#this is self indulgence at its max
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Woah sorry to get philosophical anyways heres sam and max kissing from a month ago
#really shitty doodle but whateva here yall go#hmgmghm self indulgence at its finest I am so cringe and free#sam and max#doodle#ship art
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some more George (+ Max!) moments â¤ď¸â¨
#george russell#max verstappen#autumn posts#I need a synonym for moments but its just such a good catch-all...#like maybe âinstances?? snippets of time?? self indulgent swooning fodder?? hehe idk!!#anyways love him#gax will always have a v good flavor fr fr đââď¸ďż˝ďż˝ďż˝
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would literally never happen in a million billion years but can you imagine if they got lewis and max to do the box of bluffs challenge
#formula 1#max verstappen#lewis hamilton#god its such a self indulgent thought but it keeps me up at night#f1#charles is more likely to start driving for red bull before this happens but oh well
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& every time it's you
#hardenshipping#magma leader maxie#aqua leader archie#gay people in every universe. do you get it#anyways this is very self indulgent LMAO this is just all my aus where they looked visiblly different enough in the portrait area#big fan of dropping beauty n the beast au into here without ever introducing it also#'why is maxie a furry in one' dont worry about it. he likes it actually! its fine#okay in order now#beauty and the beast au#not an existing tag thats fine#pmd au#splatoon au#also not an existing tag i think i never shared more abt that one other then the initial post here#admin au#2x!#ponyo au#and then just main verse :] meant to be the post oras designs but you cant really see it#also it remains so funny drawing OR admin au max because its like. that ones too happy thats not maxie#when you never went through your angry lonely sad mad development arc and you r actually capable of just showing you like things and#smiling genuinely without embarassment etc etc etc#max is meant to b taking a picture of them on his ipad on that one btw wwww
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maxiel(ish) drabble pt 2
part 1 if you're confused
Okay, back to his phone screen. As was common in Daniel's life, the problem was decidedly of his own making, and yet here he was. He'd been avoiding the messenger app all morning, ever since the little notification from Christian popped up, and he would've gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for that stupid green owl. Fine, whatever, this was embarrassing to admit, but Seb had (correctly) assumed that after Singapore Daniel had reduced himself to lounging around and wallowing in his own misery, and he'd suggested a hobby, which wasn't necessarily a bad idea. It was embarrassingly mundane, embarrassingly in his mid thirties, embarrassingly retired and trying to pretend like he had important stuff to do, but Daniel had never really gotten around to learning French (he'd written it down on his 2019 resolutions, even joked with Cyril about it, and then promptly forgotten about it), and Alex had convinced him to download the app. He was even friends with Lily on it, too, they gave each other little nudges and sometimes exchanged Streak Freezers or whatever they were called, Daniel was too cool for remembering that. Anyway. Daniel was about to lose his hard-earned 32 day streak, so he clicked on the notification, his long, tan legs spread on the couch as he watched some show he couldn't even remember the name of. He usually went for movies, but he was getting a little bit of a bitter aftertaste to them after he saw Carlos and Charles in that stupid premiere. It was fine, of course, he was happy for his friends, the lingering ughness of it wasn't jealousy, it was just... what could've been. Daniel had watched Gladiator, the first one, with Max, ages ago. A small, bitter, awful part of him wanted it to be them, on the red carpet, matching tuxedos as they mingled. He wondered, sometimes, what would've happened if he'd had the balls to invite Max to the MET Gala, last year, but back then he was too preoccupied with the Alpha Tauri thingy to realize what a dick he was, going alone. Maybe he could ask Lewis for a seat next year. Big, fat chance, Daniel. Ask him to go out for a steak, afterwards, seared with extra butter on top, would ya?
part 3 (last one)
#daniel ricciardo#danny ric#dr3#like seriously this is 90% danny you've been warned#max verstappen#maxiel#rpf#f1 fic#hurt/comfort#domestic fluff#I PROMISE WE'RE GETTING TO THE MAX PART I JUST WANTED A LOT OF DANNY SELF LOATHING OKAY#mom said its MY turn to make the self indulgent fanfiction#does this count as character study?? inner monologue?? danny ric is my pookie hours??#writing shitty fanfiction as a coping mechanism <3#minor scooby doo reference#i told yall duoling would be a plot point
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Fun fact, Finn and Rumi really like Astroboy thanks to the geek introducing the series to them.
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Something good comes with the bad, a song's never just sad
trigun - vashwood fic, taking place after tristamp s1.
4 chapters, now complete. almost 15k words, general audience, mostly just hurt/comfort and angst, and later even some fluff âĽ
It took Wolfwood a long time to find him. Weeks turning into months of wandering the scorching desert, from towns to abandoned settlements, suffering the unbearable heat that wasnât even the least of his worries.
He spent every waking moment repeating his sins and apologies, even when his throat was parched and hands scratched from the leather bands on his cross, the weight nothing in comparison to the hurt he felt from his betrayal. Was it really betrayal if he had no other choice? If Vash knew all along and went with him anyway? What else could he have done? Without any answers to his questions he could only put one foot before his other; keep going, keep searching, until he would get his answers, until his wishes and pleas were heard.
(or: After July, Wolfwood makes a promise to find Vash, whatever it takes. What he finds is not quite Vash.)
link to ao3
#mine#my fic#ufff i wasnt sure if i wanted to share it here but it took me so long!! im kinda proud of it#vashwood#trigun#trigun stampede#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#also hints of ma/shwood but mostly by the ending#its just self indulgent and me coping after ending of s1 ;-; i need them both to get some hugs#it rlly was supposed to be like a 3k words max fic but then i just needed to add on to it..#also i feel wolfwood's characterization is mostly from the 98 anime bc i like him a lot in that#i feel his stampede version could become that soon in s2.. hopefully
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And after all of the storms we made it through The sky could fall, I'd be powerless to move 'Cause I know when I'm with you, who can love you like I do?
Y'all this took me like 5 straight hours ;A; i hope u like <3
#the outer worlds#millsoto#felix millstone#vicar max#artists on tumblr#digital art#character art#yeah the bike is traced i dont care anymore that shit took forever to get right#its a suzuki something or other#maximillian desoto#outer worlds#the outer worlds au#this is my self indulgent modern day au which is somehow in the past bc tow is so far in the future#ill get my thots down later#anyways prepare to see this a lot imma reblog it a billion times shit took me forever
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really taking itarus line about being self indulgent in your works and running with it rn
#im REALLY goin for it this time#self indulgence to the MAX#cringe is dead and i will strangle its remaining followers with my own two hands#f/oposting
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Okay but I did write some things today
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this has been in the drafts for a little bit and if yall know me, yall also know i hate having drafts. so. yeah. quick and dirty concept thrown down on paper.
wc: 670
Ever since she was young, the girl felt like she could see ghosts.
In particular, a ghost. Singular.
She had seen it everywhere. Since before her earliest memories, and she just knew it had always been around.
Her father told her to ignore it. To not look at it, even as it lingered just out of the corner of her eyes.
He never answered why.
Until she asked someone else.
"Eh? Ah, that thing? Yeah, we all see it. Hell, at one point, my old bossman thought it was a god. In a way, it is. Still, wasn't a pretty sight when he begged it for another chance with his ex," Butcher spoke casually, leaning against a wall in the apartment, scowling at the memory.
"Wait, that's god?!" the girl with the cat ears exclaims, shell-shocked, her eyes flickering out of the window, where the figure had been standing for the past few hours. Motionless. It's gaze boring into her every time she passed said window.
Butcher can't help but laugh lowly at the reaction, reassuring her: "Hah, don't go stroking that thing's ego. God's a strong word to use f'r it."
"But," he began, eyes glinting with a hint of mischief, "I'll let you in on a little secret, kid." He doesn't miss the way her ears perk up at that, chuckling, as he continues talking, his own eyes trained on the thing.
"The more it likes ya, the easier it is t' get away with everythin'. Hell, it might even let ya talk t' it eventually."
"Hold on, pops, what?! You've talked?! To that thing?!" the girl exclaims in disbelief, staring at her half-father
"Of course, kid. Had to beg it real nicely t' not make me blind in the ol' right eye," he explains, pointing out the slash scar that goes across his eye and eyebrow. "Still, I ain't know exactly what or why it is. Ain't seen it hurt no one, so it really ain't my business," Butcher shrugged.
That just made MÄrÄŤte gawk even further: "Hold on, you almost lost vision in that eye- wait, no, it healed you?!"
"Oh yeah, it pays to be a suck-up sometimes. Not a damn clue how it did what it did, but I ain't complainin' about having my eyes in tact!"
Returning her gaze to the ghastly being, she noticed it had disappeared. Before being able to voice her complaints about the figure disappearing, Butcher cut her off with an amused huff.
"Sh. Behind ya."
Curious, she turned around and then stumbled back with a shriek, as the older man struggled to keep in his laughter upon making sure the girl won't fall.
The being was staring at her intently, their noses were almost touching. Inside. Oh fuck, it was inside!
Butcher held her still as it approached, shushing her and petting her to subtly reassure the frightened girl as to not flee.
The phantom brought a hand upwards, and caressed her lip, before pulling back wordlessly.
MÄrÄŤte was not sure what disturbed her more. The fact that she could not feel any actual physical touch, or the fact that her teeth now felt like they all no longer fit into her mouth properly. With a bewildered expression, she touched her lips, eyes widening as the felt the slight poke of something sharp, and whips up to look at Butcher.
"Did I get my fangs back?!" She squealed in excitement, holding her mouth open for him to see, and he just laughed in amusement, nodding: "Sure did, pipsqueak. Looks cute on ya."
By the time she was done with her celebratory exclaim, and was ready to thank the figure, she was met with nothing but thin air, and her mood dampened ever so slightly.
"Eh, don't sweat it. Bet that thing's busy as all hell. Could probably hear you yelling from a galaxy away," he teased lightly. "Now. How do those lil' fangs feel, hm? No pain?" he continued with his questions.
"Uhm... It's a little weird... But good! Good weird! And painless."
"Heh, figured so. Now be good. I've heard it likes to give gifts as much as it likes takin' em away."
#chess writes#oc butcher tag#oc mÄrÄŤte tag#if you notice the exclusive use of it/its for the ghost and dont like it#then boy do i have the news for you#i just needed the self indulgence#if noones gonna use my pronouns right then at least i myself fucking will#because i am sick and tired#and yes the pronoun thing is half the reason i wrote this. this is max copium#dont look at me
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1:32 AM: A LOVE LETTER TO THE PRETTIEST GIRL!
spellbook intro! when Nanami takes a moment to study his wife after a date night, his heart pours out a soliloquy for the ages!
potion ingredients! 4.4k+, pwp(?), wife!reader x husband!nanami kento, fluff+ smut, fingering, clitslapping(1), cunnilingus, explict talk, mating press, grinding, allusions to sex (penetration), self-indulgent to the max âĽď¸
note to casters! yeah, this is so indulgent. and i'm sorry i have to say this...p**** is pink :). grab a mirror and check for yourself.
Champagne.Â
A drink known to be indulged during the most influential times of human history. Itâs a famed tag that runs through nations upon nations, beloved by the heaven blend of Pinot, Meunier, and Chardonnay. It pulls the tongue into an envious mĂŠnage-Ă -trois between the rich taste and the cheeky spry bubbles seething oneâs cheeks into a world of heat âall doomed to end once a swallow washes away all the bliss.Â
From its days of ruling beside monarchy to its dwindled expression in the modern world, it has yet to lose its class. It still rules amongst those with exquisite, those who can handle the feverish rush of having rapture ruin all composure. Â
Itâs suitable for a man like Nanami to indulge in such refinement too, just a single sip from the tall slender glass seated beside his plate transports his mind into a place where the weight of a jewel-encrusted crown sits upon his head. And in this universe, he rules over a 64 square meter condo, a beloved lord sleeping in his king-sized bed, and a lawful husband to his queen.Â
Another sip reminds him of the gracious air surrounding the nightâa date night catered by a meal of shared efforts and a bottle of Nanamiâs favorite champagne. Itâs sweet like forbidden fruit, the heavenly delight soothing his woes.Â
His gentle stare falls onto you, the infamous cinnamon fawning over how red complements your skin in that dress, over your delicate poutâno, obsessing over how your lips nurse the rim of the glass as if it were a kiss. As to how the heavens gifted a man such as he with one of their own angels, itâs a blessing heâs taken without a second thought.Â
However, itâs a feeling that even after three years of marriage has yet to subdue. The riveting swell that throws his heart into turmoil whenever you giggle. The wash of goosebumps set to claim his skin when your hand simply grazes against his own. The trance your gentle coos lure him into, just like now.
âKennnn, Baby? Are you okay?â
Flurries of mindless blinks brings Nanami back into the present, where heâs met with your own stare. Where silence settles comes the bustle of apologies and giggles, Nanami âHm?âOh! Iâm fine, Honey. Iâm so sorryâmissed what you said there, can you repeat it?â
âOh, itâs fine! I was asking what should we do about the dishes? All that cooking and I always seem to forget about cleaning.â
Nanami merely shrugs his shoulder, âIâll wash them.â
âBut arenât you tired? We could just leave them to soakââ
The rambles of solutions come to a slamming shut as Nanami reaches over to your side of the square dining table, his fingers seamlessly knitting within your own.
âThat was a really good steak. The garlic butter we made last weekend was a perfect touch. Oh, and the mashed potatoes, you always outdo yourself, Honey. All I did was peel the potatoes and help sear the steak, the least I can do is cleanâŚright?â
A helpless sigh passes through your glossed lips, âYouâre not getting me to agree, yâknow. I still say we just go get ready for bed.â
Nanami calls his hand, his energy, even his presence over the table back to his side in trade for the back of his chair for asylum. He gives you a steady stare that pairs all too well with a grin and a pat on his lap. âCome here.â
Thereâs safety in being wrapped up in Nanamiâs arms as you settle in his care, his muscle-ribbed arms thick arms lacing around your waist, his large hands draping off your hip, all while he keeps one leg bouncing to a steady rhythm.Â
âWhy do you worry your pretty little head off about the fine details, huh? Thatâs my job.âÂ
âI know, butâŚâ
Weakness grows in your heart as you look down into his eyesâthose tired eyes casted by an ardent glow. Exhaustion still canât taint his heart, it canât begin to ruin the tender nature he abides to you. You canât help but soothe him, your hand racing to cup his cheek, the pad of your thumb skating along the curves of his bottom lip.Â
âBut you work so hard, Kento. You should come to bed with me, just leave all this for tomorrow.â
But you know himâhe canât leave any job with loose ends. Whether itâs at the office, small repairs around the house, or simply washing dishes, Nanami finds a sense of ease in the natural order of tasks from start to finish. And when some principle challenged his own, he had every reason set and ready to roll for an explanation.
Except for tonight.
Tonight, silence serves as Nanamiâs winded explanationâand the kind pecks he pushes back against your touch.Â
âKen?â
âMhm?â
âArenât you going toâŚsay somethingâŚor anything?â
Patience gets the better of you as Nanami simply keeps himself entertained with your thumb. His kisses melt into you skin, his soft hums strike every fiber, and each pinch of his lips leaves you dangling at the end of your rope. Nanami stands from the chair, cradling you in his arms. His steps are guided by routine, up the stairs and through the first door to the right, straight into the bedroom.
Nanami drops you on the bed.
You canât really pinpoint when the plush warmth of your bed welcomed you home, but with Nanamiâs thick chest pinning you to the sheets, itâs a quick conclusion you push off rather quickly.
How could you focus on such fine details when heâs lathering the junctures of your collarbone in kisses, trailing back up to your awaiting lips.Â
âSweetheart.â
âYes, Baby?âÂ
Nanami gives in to you with a kiss, his lips just barely sinking into yours before heâs hulling himself back onto his feet.
âGo get ready for bed and when you wake up, Iâll be right there next to you.â
Sleep is all Namai intended for you to have, he'd be damned if something so trivial as chores would prevent you from rest. And when Nanami did finish up with the last bowl, sleep fell heavy on his mind all the same.
It weighed heavy on his mind through a hot shower, through his nightly routine, even as he mindlessly slipped into a pair of briefs and beneath the bed sheets.
ButâŚhis tired eyes had to land on youâhis precious angel.
Oh, his pretty wife who glows underneath the moonâs rays, laid on your side with the blanket tucked up to your chin. Heâs eager to join you, sliding himself right beside your bodyâwhere nothing but a pair of panties hugs you.Â
It certainly doesnât help how you gravitate to Nanami, even while underneath sleepâs spell. Grinding the thick globes of your ass into his lapâand right where the head of his cock sits snug against the waistband of his briefs.
In a desperate search for a distraction, Nanami cranes his neck to greet the neon red digits bleeding through the face of his bedside clockâwhere the best joke known to man awaits him.
1:32 AM.Â
Just an hour into the new day Nanami is met by pure mockery. Of course, his sweet wife all swept up in sleep makes for an even better punch lineâ-the growing bulge sinking between your ass. A quiet mind is all he wants, why heâs drowning his mind in those meditative mantras youâve taught him when work becomes too much all at once.
But itâs a fleeting dream the moment those throbs ripple through the thick veins stretching over his cock.Â
âSweetheart, câmonâŚgive me a chance at least,â heâs muttering for his ears alone.Â
Yet the only chance Nanami knows he has is to follow in your steed and sleep away his impending thoughts. He gently lifts the blanklet up to his shoulder, only for the chilling gush to fan across your body.
âMmm, âm cold, Ken.â
âI know, I know, Iâm gonna fix that right away, Sweetheart.â
Sunken beneath the heavy blanket, Nanami carves out every inch of your spine with his chest, slotting himself flush against you. His arms surge to envelop you, giving way for his hand to greedily cup the silky fat of your breast.
For a moment heâs sworn heâs beaten lust curse because well, cradling his sleeping beauty like this, allowing for his body, his warmth to sew his body to your own.Â
âHowâs that? Feels warmer now, Sweetheart?â His voice gently coos in your ear.Â
He doesnât expect much, a sheepish nod and a mumble thrillingly satisfies Nanami. He canât explain it, but as he steals a glance over you, he finds his wretched mind delighted by mundane beauty.
A painting is known to capture a moment in time through the perspective of the artistâbut what Nanamiâs eye beholds before him is too good for any picture, any painting, for every medium of art would fail to capture the radiant glow the moon kisses upon your skin. It would fail to mimic the soft curl of your lips, free from control and lifted behind the pure rapture of your mind. It certainly couldnât transcribe the very details consumed by Nanami.Â
Maybe itâs due to the curse of the night overwhelming Nanami, but he simply canât be alone right now, not while love has him spiraling down a self-induced hole. He canât stop himself from taking to your shoulder, granting his lips the tactful satisfaction of littering kisses upon your skin. Â
âHoneyâŚare you really asleep?â He pouts, yet he immediately reflects on himself as he swipes yet another look at the clock. â
Itâs whatâŚ1:40 now, I should be asleep too, howeverâŚâÂ
Breaking his trail of kisses, Nanami softly sighs as he gathers all his wayward thoughts, all for this moment only heâll hold a record of.
âI can only say this while you sleep. Itâs pathetic of me, but I havenât gotten the confidence to face you as I should. Iâm not one for many words, nor do I show all the emotion I hold inside of me. But, I hope that my love for you bleeds through every touch, every stare, every kiss, and every breath. I breathe for you. I live for you. And should it come to pass, Iâd kill for you. Iâve never felt more endeared to anyone before but youâŚYou give me all the strength I need to be a better man. I just hope to-"
â...Ken, Honey? Are you on a phone call?â
âOh umâŚâ His bloodâs running cold through every vein in his body. Suddenly, heâs stricken dumb and frozen underneath the weight of speculation. But he is who he isâa calm man with logic on his sleeve. Pushing out a huff through his nose, Nanami finds himself at ease as he peers down at your hazy eyes.
âN-No, noâŚjustâŚthinking aloud. Go back to sleep, okay?â
You muse him with a passing look over your shoulder. âThinking aloud, hm? Tell me.â
Before Nanami can conjure up some excuse as his alibi, youâve already to bury yourself within his chest. Your soft hands buff his nerves down to naught through lazy swipes across his taut pecs. In your care, his heartâs raging scream dwindles down to a tepid thump, his lungs spoiled with fulfilling breaths, and his mindâs calmer than the vast Pacific Oceanâall thanks to you.Â
âYouâŚreally want to know?âÂ
âYup,â your eyes flutter open to hang upon Nanamiâs heavy lids. âTell me anything and everything.â
Giving in, Nanamiâs head falls into a gentle tilt, âDo you know how beautiful are you?â
âIâd like to think so.â
âYou say it like that, but I donât know if you really doâŚâ
âYou think so highly of me.â
âI have to, youâre the woman Iâve devoted my life to.â
âDo you regret it?â
âRegret?â Nanami has to echo. Itâs just one of the words that have escaped his vocabulary in recent years. And a regret in your presence is something he knows heâll never, ever know again. âNever. And even if I did, Iâd do it all again just to be with you.â
Gently you bite into your bottom lip âDo you remember our wedding night?â
âOf course I do. I mean it was such aâ-â
âI think tonightâs going to be a repeat of that. Or better.â
As your words break through the air, youâre given the honor of watching Nanami crumble underneath the heat of your advances. Blush breaks across his cheeks, his pupils blown wide by lustâs bite, and right beneath your hand his heartâs back to roaring its spirted song.
âRealâahemâReally? And whyâs that?â
âWelllllâŚâ The soft drag of your coo lures Nanami into hypnosis. âI just think it is, Baby. Howâs that sound to you?â
âGoâGood. I canât ever sayââÂ
Nanami lets your lips swallow down the last of his words in your kiss. He lets you take his last breath, his last thoughts, and all the sanity he thought he relied upon. In trade of that, heâs given the chance to relinquish all control just to drink in your soft whimpers, to sate his whims with your kiss, to scour your soft skin with his rough hands.Â
Reality sets in hard and heavy for Nanami. To think, just moments ago he was too absorbed in admiring youâhis wife, his lady, his precious angel tucked beside him like any other night.
His precious angel who wears sleep with a plump pout and soft snores.
His precious angel clutching at the thick pillow beneath your head.
His precious angel who has sin creeping along your curves and slipping beneath a pair of lacy red panties.
âMmmâŚKenâŚâ your voice quietly breaks against his puffy lips. Your hips flirt with Nanamiâs feathering touch, winding along to his shy caress. âHmphâŚrightâŚright thereâŚâ
âYeah?â He allows for a lone digit to greet your dormant clit, the warmth of his touch gently thumbing circles into your bundle of nerves. âItâs riiiight here, isnât it pretty girl?â
He plays coy, letting honey drip from his lips and into your ear. âTell me so I can make everything better, Sweetheart.â
âFuck, Ken pleaseâHarder, baby, Harder!â
Dumbfounded. A dumbfounded gawk is all Nanami can muster towards youâuntil the ends of his mouth curl up into a grin he buries along the pulse of your throat.
âHarder?â He mocks with a hiked brow. âI donât think you can take that, Honey. NoâŚbutâŚsince you asked so nicelyâŚâ
SLAP!
The loud clash of Nanami's palm against your splayed cunt rings in silence over the room, serving as the perfect beat for your body to comprehend the brash course your husband's veered the night into.
âOhâFuck!â Tossing your head back between your shoulders, you mewl as the heavy chimes around the room. âT-thatâs too much, Ken!â
Nanami hides his chuckle behind a kiss he presses to your temple. âI Promise thatâs the last time tonight.â His sights slip down between your legs, watching as his fingers work to soothe your poor clit from his torture.Â
He feathers down to your slit, the tight pink ring suckling to Nanamiâs familiar touch. His intentions you know are pure, even amidst such lust staining the air. Heâs so gentle with you, having his digits complement the perky bud of your clit with sluggish strokes, teasing your hole with the sticky circles he draws.Â
All for his digits to fall victim to your pussy.
âOh, such a greedy baby,â Nanami gasps. Heâs forced to ignore the heavy stains of precum ruining his briefs, but he simply canât let you have your way. Itâs enough that heâs curling those slender fingers within your heat, strumming along the gummy walls heâs planning on staining white. âYou canât take me just playing with you, you need so much more.â
A slight curl to your lips spites him. âI guess you know me well, Honey. Your fault for spoiling me.â
âAnd? You know I donât regret a moment of it.â
Heâs so sweet with you, peppering kisses along your cheeks, filling your mind with saccharine hymns. Yet heâs incessant with his reach, sending his digits to know every inch of your pussy with each strike he drills into your sweet spot.
It's just like Nanami, once heâs found a goal, heâll work and work until the logic runs dry in his mind. Heâll work a hellish job for the trade of money, heâll risk his life for the trade of saving others, and heâll work his hand to the raw nerve to turn your pussy into a sputtering mess.Â
âGood girl, youâre making me so proud, Baby,â Nanami coos, his eyes glued between your twitching legs. âOh, I wish you could see what I do.â
âA-and w..wha-atâs that?âÂ
Your stumbling words earn an esteemed chuckle from Nanami. âWellâŚI could always just describe it to youâŚBut thereâs something I need to do first...â
It isnât like him to keep you puzzled, especially with words nonetheless. But Nanamiâs a man of action, letting his body move to support his cause. His cause for tonight, however, called for his body to slip away from your warmth all for him to be planked between your thighs and his hands kneading at your plushy skin.Â
âThatâs even better. Now, where do I even beginâŚâ
His thumb comes to peck at your bud, lazily scrolling at the perky pearl in swipes. âIâve been thinking about it all day, counting the minutes until Iâm back at your sideâŚback between your legsâŚback to having this pussy drip bliss back into my poor soul.â
It isnât enough to have you laid out on a silver platter where his tongue can lather at your honey for hoursâNanami needs you to know just how deep his depravity lies. He slowly drags his tongue to wet his plump lips, soothing the ravenous urge that boils to the forefront of his mind with dumb babbles.Â
âJust soâŚprettyâŚand pink. So sweet, so soft. Honey, I canât go a day without you, youâre my lifeline, every beat of my heart. I justâŚâ
His touch gets the better of his coherency. He knows better than to find focus elsewhere when speaking, but in truth, Nanami did notâhe should not have caught your slicked hole fluttering at the sound of his soliloquy.Â
âOhâŚFuck meâŚâ
He wants to be kind, he wants to be sweet, and Nanami wants to embody the very traits heâs fallen in love with.
But he canât.
Nanami canât play the nice guy when he greedily welcomes your pussy back into his salacious mouth with a gracious sigh, his jaw hungrily working to force that poor button into a pudgy bloat.
Cunnilingus. Itâs an art heâs swiftly mastered after three years of marriage, learning every inch of your body like your own. He knows where exactly his tongue should flit, where his finger curls the best, and even how long it should take for your body to shatter at his hands.
But itâs an effortless art when mastered behind love, and it steals Nanamiâs breath away every time he catches his breath.Â
âFuck,â his curse breaks through the air. His hands knead at the silky plush hidden underneath your thigh, leaving every curve of his fingerprint to sear into youâ-to mark you as his own. Heâs eager to catch your eyes, those adorable eyes that well up with the fattest tears whenever he pedals his tongue right against your clit.  Â
As the age-old game of cat and mouse welcomes itself onto the stage known as the bed, you unassumingly take up your role the second you jerk away from Nanamiâs silent plea.
What he wants from youâtime, affection, or maybe even an orgasm, every idea falls to the back burner the moment your hips mindlessly buck into his mouth. You could have sold him the story of it being an accident, but why ruin his fun where heâs so hellbent on this one night that your bodyâs finally taking offense?
Though, when the rare glow dots the eyes he shoots up at you, you swear you can see hearts in the distance of his blown pupils.Â
âOh, look at that,â Nanami almost humors himself as he takes another glance at your cunt.
A precarious man such as he canât afford to miss any details. His eyes cling to the unfolding sight, how his thick digits bathe in your essence, carefully sketching his own path about your folds so rich with nerves. Heâs shamelessly gawking at how the succulent hues of rose bodes well with his fair skin, each pass he bestows upon your cunt pulls him into a self-induced trance.
âMaking such a mess just from me talking. What a dirty mind youâve got, isnât that right, Honey?âÂ
Right on the tip of your tongue, the words baste behind the sweetest rapport. You could let him have him, fill his ears with talk of how lechery paints his face like a mask. He is your husband, yet the side heâs letting out to roam tonight leaves your fuzzy mind combing with an answerâand fast.Â
âW-Where is this co-comming f-from, Baby?âÂ
Thatâs what you say, but the moans slipping from your traitorous mouth when Nanami plants one last kiss to your folds tells him all that needs to be known. Â
âWhat?â He chuckles to himself. The pads of his digits wade through the glassy web sewn between your delicate folds, âCanât handle me talking about your pussy, Sweetheart? Iâm sorry but you'll have to take it. And, speaking of taking itâŚyou know what else I love about you?â
âWhatâs that?â Your voice trails out behind a whimper.
Just to catch your eye, Nanami allows for the single tug of his briefs to free him from hell reincarnated. With the gray waistband sitting underneath the heavy bloat of his balls, his hand hungrily grips the base of his cock. A hellish squeeze around his rippling veins has your eyes nearly crossing at the pearly tears spilling from his tip.Â
With the thread of sanity left in your mind, your hands race to ball the blanket within your fists, for some kind of grounding. âFuck! Please! Please, tell me, I canât wait anymore, Baby!â
âLet me show you then,â Nanami hums as he cup at the back of your knees. âI love when I fold you in halfâŚjuuuust like thisâŚâ
His words speak for him, Nanamiâs sheer strength working pin your poor, tired body into one of his favorite positionsâa mating press.
âI can see just how hard you try to take every inch of me. Making your poor pussy stretch around my cock, you must really love me, donât you Honey?â
Itâs sinfully natural the way the fat blushing crown of Nanamiâs cock sits upon your clit, a detail heâs made himself keen to. His thick bulb sobbing those white tears all because of badly he needed to have you. To have his fingers work at your gushing cunny is one thing, his cock on the other hand?
Heâs on course to face ruin tonight.
Heâs already planning the next position, the hour, the next day, all dedicated to keeping his fat length choked within your walls for as long as he could.
Why with such knowledge, itâs no wonder his hips fall into a languid toll, leaving the thick head to trace every curve of your cunt. Heâs driving up against every nerve just to watch your face quiver, to see those tears he loves so much all from a little teasing.Â
His head dips along the marked tract of your neck, a cowardly move to hide his own flush face. His hands clip to your waist, baring your body between the smothering warmth of his thick chest and bedâwithout an inch to spare.Â
His muffled voice hums against your neck, âT-That feels good right?âÂ
âFuhâitâs sâ good Ken. âm so close, Baby please!âÂ
âItâs too soon to cum, Sweetheartâyou know that.â Nanami faces betrayal from his warning, his hips snapping against your own. âJust take it nice ând easâshit! Oh Honey, you feel soâŚsoâŚfuck, thatâs so good!â
âKennnn! Fuck, Iâm gonna cum!â You hysterically sob in his ear. Itâs all for good reason as those ominous white stars begin to freckle your vision. The knot hasnât even pulled taut shattered and yet youâre already a victim to its claim. The mind-altering high that rips you out of your body for nothing short of a few seconds.
âHold it, you canât yet, Sweetheart, notââ
Sending your grip to sink into the twitching muscle of his biceps, you whimpered out against Nanamiâs wishes. âI canât, Kento! Itâs too much!â You knew all too well what was coming and as much as Nanami claims to know as well, he simply couldnât have you reeling off something so mundane as humping.Â
âPlease Honey, hold it. Just a littleââ
âFuck! âm cumming!âÂ
The perilous yelp echoes around the room as the pure state of bliss paints itself white in your mind. All that pressure, the tensions, it all slips away from you through the harsh arch your spine fights beneath Nanami.
Itâs futile to try and stop the inevitable, and the bliss that comes with surrender is all the more peaceful. When your body tingles with the aftershocks, your mind hazy from the stress and woes of the day, all of the negative canât survive when a high like that comes crashing hard and heavy.Â
Exhaustion houses itself in your body, accompanying weakness and the giddy smiles that you canât hold backâuntil your body feels like a weight has been lifted off your chest.
âThatâŚwhew, that was soâKento?â
Your spotty sights focus upon falling onto Nanamiâs silhouette, his towering form resting back on his haunches. His handâs fallen between your bodies, a loose fist drumming against your skin. Heâs pummeling his cock beneath harsh strokes, forcing abstract thick ropes of white to dance along your puffy lips.Â
âKen, Baby?â You call out cautiously as his body collapses over yours. âItâs okay,â we can call it an early nightââ
âI canât leave you unsatisfied, it was pathetic of me to let go right now,â He huffs, Weâve got our routineâgonna fill this pretty pussy so fucking full just so I can clean you up. And I have to tell you something.â
Your eyes soften over Nanami, desperately watching as the man seeks redemption. He isnât one to be a sore loser, but when it comes to youâheâll work until he breaks just to know that he was behind your euphoria.Â
All resolutions point to you supplying his motive with undying support, especially when your digits reach to strum at the sparse blond hairs along the nape of his neck. âGo ahead, tell me Ken.â
A wicked grin stretches onto Nanamiâs features, only to hide behind a kiss within the valley of your breasts.
âOh, I love you so much, Baby. Canât wait to give all my love to the prettiest girl!â
#jujustsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen nanami#jjk nanami#nanami smut#nanami kento#nanami x reader#jujutsu nanami#jjk drabbles#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#kento nanami#cw sex mention#cw smut#//⍠Ë⥠â・ ââđđđđđđ!//
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Jupiter đŞ Conjunct Planets
Jupiter Conjunct Ascendant
This is one of the most desirable astrological aspects anyone can have. You have a larger-than-life personality that others find extremely attractive. You easily make a good first impression on people because you are friendly and outgoing. Broadminded and enthusiastic, you have an eagerness for knowledge and travel. You come into contact with people who can help you socially, financially and professionally. About the only negative thing that can be said about this aspect is that there can be a tendency to self-indulgence and weight gain.
Jupiter Conjunct Sun
You have an essentially positive and optimistic outlook on life, coupled with a strong desire to improve your position in the world. You are motivated to expand your awareness and broaden your horizons, which you can do through travel and higher education. You are naturally enthusiastic, gregarious and generous towards others but can also be immoderate and wasteful or extravagant. You are inclined to overdo things, especially the good life, which can lead to weight gain and its associated problems.
Jupiter Conjunct Moon
You are naturally generous, open-minded and kind-hearted and often experience benefits in life with or through others. Your emotional honesty and good humor make you popular and appreciated by others. You are socially aware and always ready to help other people. You know how to enjoy yourself and are fond of sociable and pleasurable activities. Relations with women are usually positive and often personally advantageous. Your outlooks on life can fluctuate with your moods and you may experience religious and philosophical conflicts. You will probably travel and possibly live overseas.
Jupiter Conjunct Mercury
You are basically an optimist at heart and usually express a positive and confident outlook on life. You are able to exercise intelligent reasoning and are generally tolerant of other people's ideas and perspectives. In general, you are a good communicator and can express your ideas easily and lucidly. You are quite wise and understanding of things and others will frequently seek your counsel and advice. In your desire to broaden your knowledge, you will most likely travel, correspond with people in other countries and possibly study or have business arrangements overseas. You may be well read and erudite. Certainly, you appreciate the value and benefits of a sound education. You will most likely have success as a speaker or writer. A sense of humor, wit and a generous nature will gain you popularity with others. Negatively, you can be intellectually arrogant, preachy or inclined to magnify things to stress a point.
Jupiter Conjunct Mars
Live life to the max is your motto. You are ambitious for personal success and never back down from a challenge. In fact, the tougher something is the more determined you become. You usually manage to achieve whatever you set out to accomplish because quitting never enters your mind. You are a productive, energetic and resourceful person. If other factors in your chart support it, you have managerial and business abilities. At the very least, you are decisive and able to make decisions quickly. Also, you have a good sense of timing, especially when it comes to maximizing opportunities. Naturally competitive, you enjoy sports, adventurous games and physical exercise.
Jupiter Conjunct Venus
This is a very desirable aspect to have in a chart because it brings social and worldly benefits and facilitates successful relationships with others. Warm-hearted and sociable, you are popular with other people because of your readiness to give generously. You have a pleasant and affectionate nature, which people find attractive and appealing. Romantic encounters are generally positive and happy and artistic ability is evident. You know how to enjoy yourself; however, you can be prone to self-indulgence, sensuality or wastefulness. There can also be an inclination toward laziness.
Jupiter Conjunct Saturn
In general, your life alternates between periods of optimism and pessimism and periods of financial abundance and financial hardship. It can sometimes seem that everything good that happens to you comes at a cost. Your challenge is to find the middle path between enjoying life and keeping it real. Occasionally, you experience feelings of dissatisfaction with your lot in life; however this can serve as a motivation to improve your situation. All of your personal successes - academic, financial or emotional - are hard won and gained through industry, perseverance and self-discipline. You have a good head for business because you understand the cycles of expansion and consolidation. Your philosophical outlooks tend to be orthodox and conservative.
Jupiter Conjunct Uranus
You are highly independent and delight in your own originality and uniqueness. You are quite happy doing your own thing and don't concern yourself with other people's opinions. Your faith in your own abilities is usually strong and, regardless of what may be happening in your life, your trust in the future rarely flags. You have an eye for good opportunities, coupled with a keen intuition and an exceptional sense of timing. This can be a good luck aspect for receiving sudden windfalls; however try not to depend on this as a reliable source of income! You will almost certainly travel and have out-of-the-ordinary experiences when abroad.
Jupiter Conjunct Neptune
You are essentially an idealist who sometimes sees the world through rose-tinted glasses. As a result, you can perceive situations to be quite different from what they are in reality. You are selfless, compassionate and emotionally sensitive to the needs of others. Spiritual subjects may interest you and it is possible that you possess psychic ability. A talent for music and art is also likely. On a more mundane level, you may have an enthusiasm for taking risks, however, it is impossible to tell if your speculations will succeed or fail - so you need to take care.
Jupiter Conjunct Pluto
You have a strong desire to make your mark on the world and to accomplish something of significance. Your ambition and self-motivation are pronounced, and you will pursue your goals in life with passion and intensity. If other factors in your chart support it, this aspect can bring you power and leadership over others. At the very least, you will be known in your own group or community for organizing others and taking charge of situations. However, watch that you don't let power go to your head, because you will turn people against you, especially if they think they're being manipulated. Similarly, you can risk placing yourself in serious loss situations if you provoke those with greater authority than yourself.
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#astrology#astrology observations#zodiac#zodiac signs#astro community#astro observations#vedic astrology#astro notes#vedic astro notes#astrology community#jupiter in scorpio#jupiter#jupiter in libra#jupiter in aries#jupiter in taurus#jupiter conjunct venus
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in so deep â´ď¸ cl16
genre: friends to lovers, charles has a huge crush and is a lovesick bloke, smut, humor, FluffÂ
word count: 13.1k Â
It takes you many cities, a botched Halloween costume and a failed break-in to realize how much Charles likes you. It takes Charles several years to realize he doesnât need to do much to have you like him back. title from this
nsfw warnings under the cut!
18+ because... penetrative sex, praise central, size kink, unprotected sex
auds here⌠thank u for all ur love during my periods of being awol .... i wrote this over the course of a week and i hope u all like it!!! its very much a self indulgent thing... :P
The first time Charles realized he liked you, you were both posed for a picture.
It happened at a dinner party in London, in late autumn, thrown by you to celebrate your first year on the paddock as a reporter. Few friends had been invited but, with how noisy everyone was and with the ease of conversation, it felt like a houseful of people in your narrow dining area. Lando was in front of the mirror, tipsy, demonstrating his best rendition of an Irish accent to a genuinely interested Alex and Lily.Â
Max was playing with your pet cat, Gene Kelly, and mentally plotting a heist to sneak him out with Pierreâs help. Your boyfriend, Liam, was making himself a cocktail. And Lewis had been roaming around with a glass of dry wine and his brand new film camera to document the nightâs festivitiesâbut the host was nowhere to be found. Unbeknownst to everyone, full off dinner and tipsy off cocktails, youâd ducked into the balcony to find where Charles had run off to for the night.
The music was muffled when you shut the door, leaving it ajar just a little bit. Lissie had played Cocteau Twins and was singing whatever gibberish lyrics played, fully drunk off a bottle of Titoâs. Still laughing over her predicament, you turned to Charles and refocused your attention on him. Is it boring?
What w⌠what is? He asked, turning to you. Briefly his eyes flitted to your hand, the bracelets clasped onto your wrist. He noticed you held matching bottles of beer but yours remained full, nail tapping idly on the semi-opaque glass.
My party, you responded wryly, cocking your head to the side. A loose tendril of hair fell over your eye and he itched to tuck it back in place, thumb over your ear. You continued, still pressing for an answer. You left to smoke but you didnât come back.Â
I like the view. A half-lie but truthful in some way. He squinted to try and make out blurry, faraway signage. I should move here. Monaco makes me sick. He tried to say it jokingly, but was betrayed by the raw tone of his voice. You hummed quietly, to signify you were listening.
So move. Whoâs stopping you? You smiled slightly. Aside from your ludicrous career, of course.Â
You had a natural disposition ofâsomething. He didnât quite know how to describe it, almost like the rest of him had yet to catch up with something only his heart was already decided on. You spoke and acted with some kind of smoothness that only the most popular kids in secondary school could have reins over, but you always claimed you werenât very popular in your teenage years. He just knew he liked hearing you talk, watching you smile. He felt somethingâbut he didnât want to name it even if he knew exactly what it was. Instead he played into your joke. Yeah, Iâve been told I should move to Dubai instead, become a prince.
You laughed aloud. You are terribly unfunny, you know that?
Am I? He asked. Just then, as the cotton of his tee brushed against your bare shoulder, Liam brashly tugged the balcony door open to find you. He had this drunk smile on his face, brushing his blond hair out of the way and raising a Leica to the two of you.
Hey, I got Lewisâ camera. Smile, Liam had said, eyes squinted behind it. You remained still, half-turned to the camera, and Charles gave a smile whereas you remained in a neutral, half-smiling pose. And right there, at that very moment, as a giggle escaped your lips from having to pose so quickly and even awkwardly, Charles realized with a damning force that he had a massive crush on you.
Liam had left shortly after to resume taking pictures, but would later confront you over your âweird, odd, fucking closeness with the Monegasque blokeâ that you would vehemently deny despite a gut-churning feeling boiling low in your stomach. But thatâs later. Your conversation continued calmly, along the passive whir of London and the streets below. You both people-watched as you thought of things to sayâfinally Charles said, Are you interviewing me next weekend?
I always try to get out of it when itâs with you. You rolled your eyes, feigning irritance, then smiled to break the illusion. I think so.
Iâll make sure I have good answers. Youâre too smart. Hurts to be in the same room.Â
Like you arenât, you said back, but the rebuttal is shy in nature, like he struck you with a compliment so high you couldnât bear to return it. He felt then like this was the kind of moment where you would start holding hands any minute, timid touches between clinks of bottles. He remembered Liam existed and screwed his eyes shut. He wished so hard to be able to kiss you. Abandon all sense and just kiss you.
â
âItâs 2023 and still London has the most rubbish ass, fucking cunt, stupid wanker stoplights,â Lissie huffs beside you, checking her watch. âRight then. Weâre going to be late. You know how Lando is when people are late. Especially because this is his event.â
âWeâre not people to Lando,â you reason, tapping the steering wheel. The ETA on your navigation app tells you youâre still twenty minutes away. âWeâre his best friends. If he canât forgive us, we should kick him out of the group chat.â
âOoh, and add Alex,â Lily pipes up from the backseat, where sheâs redoing her eyeshadow to pass the time. âI keep telling you guys heâs funnier than Lando.â Both you and Lissie make faint, vague sounds of dissent and she grunts again, deflating.
âNo boyfriends in the group chat,â Lissie repeats an age-old rule thatâs been around for as long as you three (four, including Lando) have been friends. âOr girlfriends, in Landoâs case, but we havenât worried about that much, have we?â
Youâre all en route to watch Lando crank out a brand-new deejay set, one heâs spent the summer break working on. Itâs all house and inspired by beach music, and heâs very proud of it, so of course youâre all showing up to laud him. Youâre not the only ones, though, apparentlyâwhoeverâs in the city is showing up to show their support, which includes a whole stretch of drivers.
âOh, my God!â Lily says all of a sudden, eyes wide at something on her phone; you both gesture for her to show you and she does with speed. âDo you guys remember this? God, Instagram archives are a godsend.â
âYour dinner party in Chelsea!â Lissie coos, immediately sidling into a fond awwww! You tap at the story Lily had then posted: a video of everybody eating. You tap again to view the one she posted a few days later, which was a collage of Lewisâ camera scans heâd gotten developed overnight. There in the upper right corner, you almost immediately spot your photo with Charles.
âOh, Christ, that picture.â Memories of your subsequent arguments with Liam flash past your head. Playfully, all you say is, âAnd I never had a boyfriend again.â
âLiam was an Irish arse, anyway.â Lissie scoffs. âNobody liked him. Lewis joked about cleaning his camera after he used it that night. Plus, you actively avoid dating, so donât complain.â
âFair,â you say with a slight smile. Your mind lingers on the picture, the imprint of it burned fresh into your mind.Â
âYouâitâs also because you canât take a hint, babe.â Lily says matter-of-factly. âWho knows how many guys have, you know⌠fancied, or, like, had crushes on you, and you just never knew?â
âAre you saying somebody fancies me?â You ask, voice whittling out playfully as your eyes count down the seconds to the green light.
Funnily, silence is all that answers. Beside you, Lily and Lissie exchange a lookâone that communicates their years-long amusement over your cluelessness. You whirl back to them, eyebrows raised, and double down: âWait. Does somebody fancy me?â
âNo!â Lily ekes out; you donât miss Lissieâs poorly-hidden laugh. âNo. Iâm justâitâs justâno.âÂ
Truth is, it truly seems like the only person in the entire paddock (team and Sky Sports staff included) who hasnât caught on to a certain somebodyâs boyish crush is the crush herself, oblivious as ever, even years and years later. One might think youâd have realized eventually, but perhaps owed to your type A personality and immersion with work, and Charlesâ pathetic and total inability to express how much he likes you, the crush has always remained just that, despite your two friend groupsâ best efforts to hint at it.
It wasnât to say, though, that you didnât sometimes entertain the idea of liking him, too. On that one rainy race weekend when heâd brought you a plastic cup of soup, and embarrassed, laughed sheepishly at Lissieâs joking request for one; then returned twenty minutes later with soup for everyone in the media pen. Or that time in Monaco where heâd pretended to be your boyfriend at a bar to ward off a creepo from hitting on you any further. Or another time, in Budapest, when heâd drank half his body weight in jello shots and slurred out a goofy, heavy Iâm soooo sorry, baby while you helped him into the passenger seat of his car.
That one, singular time in Cancun you told your friends once and never again.
But those are isolated incidents, you suppose; plus, dating someone you work with has never seemed like a remotely good idea to you, and you donât think it ever will.
For all your thinking on the topic, you fail to realize that you donât know much at allâyou donât know the fact that Charles has liked you for years, after getting to know just how charming and funny you were as a friend. You donât know that he still gets gut-churning butterflies when he sees you, hands shaky and face tinged pink. You miss the fact that heâs not had any long-term partners in the years of his liking you. You donât know anything.Â
âDonât lie.â You narrow your eyes as you rev the car and continue the trip.Â
âWeâre not,â Lily says loudly and a touch too defensively, crossing her fingers. Quietly, she continues, âYou should just pay more attention.â
Whatever she meant to say is lost on you as soon as you make a left and spot the club Landoâs at, already teeming with high-profile guests and their high-profile cars. Half an hour later youâre inâvalet and being on the guest list effectively cuts your entrance time in half. You separate at the entranceâyou, to find Lando; your two girls, to find your reserved table. You find him eventually, busy behind the booth churning out high-frequency tropical music; he pauses for half a beat to flash a huge grin and a thumbs-up before redirecting his attention to the knobs and sliders you canât seem to guess the functions of.
These kinds of parties are affairs in and of themselves. They mimic the afterparties during the seasonânothing if not shows of opulence and networking: champagne paid for by business magnates, yachts that barely make dents in anybodyâs wallets, thick CVs, fruity cocktails spilled on pieces of clothing that cost upward of 3000 pounds. You make eye contact with at least seven skeevy businessmen before you spot your friends, but only because you hear them firstâby them you mean Lissie, her loud voice raised even more to match the noise at this club.
âI said I didnât fuâughâI donât want ye fahkinâ champagne,â she slurs out to an old man in a pressed suit, eyebrows knitted angrily. âGot it?!â Behind her, Lily and Alex (whoâs arrived now, apparently) watch, concerned and helpless to stop her but equally (perhaps more) entertained.
You step closer and make a move to calm down the exchange taking place, but somebody whispers a âheyâ in your ear and startles you. You turn, and come face to face with Charles. His black tee accentuates the breadth of his shoulders, which you connect to his crossed arms; thereâs a shy, boyish grin playing on his face. âOh, Charles!â You smile. âHey! Havenât seen you in a while.â
âThanks,â he says with a grin, straining to raise his voice. âYou lookâyou look well. Are you alone?â
âNo, Iâmââ You turn to your three friends nearby, and to Lissieâs argument heating up. âI actually have to go.â You raise your thumb, jabbing it toward them. âBut hi again⌠again!â You both laugh, but he laughs much louder. âIâll see you around.â
âI jusââ He says, and you stick around for a second to hear him say what he has to say.
âYeah?â
He clears his throat and laughs stiffly, abandoning his previous statement in favor of a new one. âI justâŚ. want⌠to have a great time.â
âOhhhh,â you holler, nodding, clearly trying to mask your extreme confusion under a polite smile. âOkay, well⌠go ahead!â
You smooth down your dress and laugh again, evidently more forced but, unfortunately for Charles, not any less pretty.
You carry yourself in a very pretty, graceful way, loud and quiet at the same time, like your confident voice when youâre holding the mic and asking questions or making drivers laugh. He might sound creepy, though, a touch too observant, if he tells you so. He observes you instead, for a second, the low cut of your dress and the way the red overhead light shines on your exposed collarbonesâand then youâre leaving. He watches you walk over to hug Lily, realizes how stupid heâs sounded, and smothers a hand over his face, humiliated.Â
â
âI just want to have a great time?â Maxâs jaw drops and he shakes his head, disappointed above all else. âCharles, what the actual. LikeâŚ. fuck?â Theyâre all camped out at the latterâs hotel room, around the dining table, in varying states of sober and doing different things to wear off the last hour of the night before theyâre all due to train or debrief again in the morning. Charles had relayed the disaster of the night to everyone at some point, but Max is the last to hear of it; this, unfortunately, does not inoculate him from the shock and secondhand embarrassment.
âPierre told me toââ Charles starts, forlorn.
âOi, no. I told you to say something like I just wish⌠Iâd seen you sooner,â interjects the Frenchman with a tut. âYou know, flirting? Not⌠whatever the fuck you said.â
âI didnâtâI wasâI lost my mind,â he groans, burying his head in his hands. It couldnât possibly be entirely his fault when you looked so pretty tonight, hair down and a wash of glitter on your eyelids. Just subtle little flecks of them. They brought out your eyes, too. And your blush, the pink flush of it that sat high on your cheekbones.
ââŚllo? Charles.â He blinks and sees Carlosâ deep eyes, wide and staring right at him, so pointedly heâs genuinely startled.
âJeeesus fucking Christ. What?â He places a melodramatic hand over his chest. âYeah?â
âWhat do you mean with theââCarlos mimics his confused expressionââI asked you a question, tonto.âÂ
âDonât bother with him,â chimes in Pierre, half-distracted by his phone. He looks up with a devious smile and continues. âHeâs still thinking of Miss Reporter of the Year.â A round of loud, jovial laughter makes its way across the table, a few teasing quips being chimed in here and there.
âI just,â mocks Pierre from across the table, adopting a sing-songy tone as he bumps his shoulder to Carlosâ with a mocking laugh. âWanna have a great time.â His voice is much higher and more mocking, which is enough to send Charles into a fit of petulant embarrassment.
âThis isnât sixth year,â he grits out quietly, but the blush on his face could just as well be plastered on the cheeks of a twelve-year-old. âGive it a rest.âÂ
âMate.â Pierreâs voice mellows into something more austere. âYou do know sheâs leaving the reportersâ job at the end of the season? Sheâs going to London full-time. No more seeing her all year round. You know this. And I keep telling you. If you are really, and I mean really, interested, I say go for it. Câest la fucking vie, yeah?â
âPlus, if she says no, you can go for pretty much anyone else, anyway,â concludes Max with a convinced smile.
âItâs not the same,â he admits helplessly, smothering his hands over his face in bleak frustration. Behind his eyelids he sees you still, beautiful and smiling and funnyâhe seriously needs to institutionalise himself before he goes even more mad with the years-long malady heâs called a crush. And seriously, for a twenty-something to have something he calls a crush is despicable in itself. He feels juvenile.
âI canât tell her. Sheâs always told people that dating coworkers is a bad idea.â
âYouâre not coworkers.â
âWeâreâwell, we still work closely together. It is the same.â He groans. âItâs just⌠Iâve said it before. If I admit I like her, things will become awkward. Iâd rather we remain friends.â
âWell⌠see, nobody said you needed to tell her,â begins Pierre schemingly, eyebrows raising. Around them, everybody groans at the birth of another Pierre-brained scheme that will, no doubt, need the enlistment of everyoneâs help and will likely end in disaster. âWhat?! Iâm just offering⌠Iâm just saying, mateâyouâve liked her since forever. Why not make a move?â
ââI canâtââ
âWithout telling her?âÂ
âPierre,â groans Carlos, ever the voice of reason, pinching the bridge of his nose. âI donâtâwhatever this is youâre planning, itâs going to go to shit. I swear.â
âYou are acting like I plan to take somebody hostage.â Pierre shrugs. âYou know, girls like when you donât tell them straight up. You have to show you like them. You know, be interested in the things theyâre interested in, compliment them, make them laugh. And then they think, oh, how thoughtful, oh, how adorable, and before you know it, they like you. And youâve got yourself a girlfriend.â
âMmm. Uh-uh. Untrue.â Max says decisively, shaking his head. âI told Kelly I liked her.â
âYeah, sĂ. I told Isa I liked her, too.â
âWill you twoâjustââ Pierre gesticulates and makes a funny noise that insinuates just go with it. âOkay?â he points out to the latter, rolling his eyes. He turns back to Charles with a ready, dazzling, so-French-itâs-scary grin and continues. âI suggest you let us be your wingmen and help you charm her.â
âWhoa, whoa, whâus? Youâre on your own here,â Max quips with a laugh. âItâs your stupid idea.â
âItâs not stupid, and itâs going to work. She probably likes you already.â His confidence carries the lie with gusto. âWe just needâyou just need to show her instead of saying the dumbest shit to her face.â Pierre leans back into his chair and shrugs matter-of-factly. âMax and I will be regular wingmen, but we have a secret weapon.â
âDonâtââ Carlos starts with a sigh.
âYes. Lando, Lily, and Lissie are all close to her, eh? Well, perfectâCarlos will get information from Lando about things she likes, you gift her those things or talk to her about them, bam sheâs in love. Itâs literally a perfect plan.â
Maybe itâs worth it. Maybeâ
âNo.â Charles shakes his head firmly, setting the record straight. âThis will not work. Whoâs to say she even needs a boyfriend?â
â
Despite what his best and closest friendsâon and off the paddockâmight have you believe, Charles hasnât always been so hopeless when it came to trying to catch your heart. His closest call came in Cancun, after a long weekend of racing and a flight to the area, early into the night where he thought he was the only one who decided to opt out of partying.
Your skinâs peeling. You turned from where you sat on a barstool observing the shore, startled, immediately relaxing when you found him standing there eyeing you. Your hair was still damp, crunchy with saltwater, and your skin had tanned considerably, a sunburn sitting on the bridge of your nose. You stuck your tongue out.
I spent the whole day swimming. He observed your bikini, yellow and green contrasting the colour of your skin. He blinked slowly, ordering himself a drink to hopefully pass the thoughts away. His eyes couldnât stop, though, wandering, the translucent material of the scarf youâd tied loosely around your hips, the tinge of heat on your shoulders and nose. Iâm burnt everywhere.
There are remedies for that. He smiled around his glass.
Iâm aware, you said lightly, crossing your legs and sliding your finger along the salt rim of yours. But just in case I forgot, maybe you could refresh my memory.
Your voice was so sweet, so low, so tempting. Already he knew he was wrapped around your finger, the same finger picking up grains of salt to press on your tongue peeking between your smiling lips. You brought your glass to your lips. It had been some time since the dinner in London so he pressed, his voice deep and a little rough, Liam can do that for you, Iâm sure.
Pity, you said meekly as you set your glass down and looked back at him. Heâs not my boyfriend anymore.
Out of eyeline, the bartenderâs eyes widened at the exchange he was overhearing.Â
Is it a pity? He asked, leaning backwards and cocking his head to the side. Itâs easy, an easy glide of conversation, flirt, something heâs wanted for a while now. To have you playing into him, and have himself playing into you, just like this. It was naturally easy in a foreign city where nobody knew who either of you were, where you were just two strangers flirting at a beachside bar.
Two strangers laughing while they dug their toes into the sand. Two strangers basking in the water, tinted orange by the sun dipping below the horizon, scarf untied in favor of one last swim before night fell. There was nothing keeping either of you from doing whatever you wanted. Nothing keeping Charles from finally acting on the attraction that honest to God crushed him.
You ended up leaning on the door of your hotel room, keycard fiddled in-between your sandy fingers. You combed a hand through your hair and offered a shy smile. So.Â
So, he replied, leaning closer. So.
Sooo. You were laughing and your breath smelled like a mint leaf and vodka. You looked up at him, blinking slowly. I have a rule.
What rule is that?
I donât date coworkers. He wanted to dip down, place a hand on the dip of your waist, and kiss you.
Pity, he said gruffly instead, a smile forming on his face.
Is it a pity? You chewed on your lip and looked at his barely parted ones, pink and pretty. When Iâm about to break it? He was about to help you do just thatâeyes fluttered shut alreadyâwhen a crash resounded from down the hall and you both turned to find the culprit. You broke apart and with your separation, whatever atmosphere of tension youâd built up popped, too, leaving you awkwardly standing beside each other.
Oh m⌠Lissie? You asked, leaning closer as you recognized your friend more and more. You narrowed your eyes, watching the girl crawl her way through the carpeted floor. Oh, Jesusâletâsâget youâ
You both hauled her up and wrapped either arm around your shoulders, unlocking her hotel room with great effort and tossing her onto the bed. You stood back and sighed at her half-blacked out state, slightly amused but ultimately relieved she ended her night unscathed.
She pried one eye open and sleepily, she groaned out, what were⌠you two⌠doing together outside your room?
Nothing, you said quickly, face warm and eyes wide.
Because youâLissie raised a lazy finger in your directionâdonât date coworkers.Â
I wasnâtâit wasnâtâgoodnight, you spluttered, eyes refusing to meet Charlesâ even as you both exited the room, paying him quiet thanks as he pulled the door back closed.
Sorry, you said, pretty as ever. The light shone on the red splotch on your nose. Goodnight.
And so he went to his room that night, bummed out and still high off your scent.
â
âYouâre staring again.â
âIâm not,â he lies through his teeth, averting his eyes away from your figure by the shore. Sue him if he was staring (which he wasnât⌠but most definitely was) but he finds you much too pretty. After the disaster that was the Mexican GP, he figures he could use some sort of stress reliever. Apparently he was not alone in thinking this, considering half the paddock hauled ass to Cancun and prompty partied.
Across Charles, Joris and Pierre share a knowing look that doesnât go unnoticed.
âI said Iâm not!â
âSo you are not staring at her blue swimsuit then?â Joris tests, mouth twisted into a devious smirk. âItâs black,â Charles says matter-of-factly before catching sight of his friendsâ smug expressions and realizing heâs implicated himself. He rolls his eyes and crosses his arms, petulantly almost. âAnd I wasnât. Can you fuckingâfuck off?â
âJust ask her out already,â Pierre groans, nodding when Joris chimes in with agreement of his own. âI seriously can-not handle another bar of this shit. Itâs been years.â
âI donât know how to,â he laments. âItâs going to be awkward if I do it all formal, and sheâs goingâsheâll laugh at me, and itâsâŚâ He blows a raspberry. âNon. Pointless.â
âJust kiss her at the party,â reasons Joris with an easy attitude, shrugging.Â
âJoris! Charles didnât know about that,â Pierre says, trying to lower his volume, but itâs pointless since theyâre barely a metre apart. âFucking tattletale.â
âParty?!â Charles repeats, eyes wide. âWhy donât I know about a party?!â
âItâs a Halloween party,â Joris says, a wacky grin on his face. âAnd you said it yourself, didnât âcha? You told us not to tell you if any functions were happening because youâre too tired to go to any. Too⌠too wrapped up racing.â He laughs. âOr something of the sort.â
âWell the seasonâs ending,â he huffs, wringing firm fingers over his face, his shut eyes, âand I still fucking havenât⌠so I think Iâm afforded a party.â
âAlright, then come to the party! Dress code, Halloween. Sexy Halloween.â Pierre wiggles his eyebrows. âYou know, speaking of our plan, Carlos overheard Lissie and Lily talking about what your girlâs costume is going to be.â He leans in closer and laces his fingers together. âSheâs going as a⌠Christina.â
âChristina?â The other two echo, confused.Â
âChristina. I did some digging, and I think itâs this.â Pierre scrolls and dicks around on his phone for a minute before turning it back around to Joris and Charles, who peek with great interest. They seem to be looking at an outdated movie poster ofâ
âCas-per the friendly ghost,â Charles reads aloud, trying to get his accent to dissipate. âHuh. What the fuck is that?â
âItâs a movie, idiot.â Pierre shuts his phone off. âStarring who? Christina Ricci.â
âVraiment? You think his crush is going to show up wearing⌠a white gown?â Joris asks, his mind stuck on the outfit heâd seen just seconds ago. âThis doesnât make sense.â
âWell Carlos and I agreed, so. Two to two. And Carlos says she and her friends always wear silly costumes like these. So if she shows up as Christina, what better way to start conversation than to dress up as Casper?â
Charlesâ eyes widen with comical horror. âNo. No, no, no. Did the ghost and the kid fuck?â
âNo!â The two men across him yell in unison.
âRight!â He gesticulates. âSo itâs not a couplesâ costume!â
âBut itâs stillââ Pierre pauses. âIt still matches. Trust me on this one, mate.â He smiles. âWe even brought the supplies.â
â
The party is a hit as soon as Charles and his group enter. The former finds refuge at the table, unwilling to socialize. Pierre roams for a bit and ends up finding you almost immediatelyâyouâre wearing low-waisted pants, a strappy top, and you sport alternating streaks of blond and black in your hair.
âHey!â He calls, jogging up to you. âI heard you were coming as a Christina. Guess who I am?â
You rake a hand through the streaks in your hair and smile. âNot just any Christina. The artist. Xtina? You know?â You twirl a bit, the dark material of your strappy pants swishing as you go, as if the movement will help Pierre deduce the costumeâs identity. âWhatever. Youâll get it. Lando isâweâre matching tonight, but I gâit wouldnât make any more sense if you donât understand it.â You sigh a bit and gesture vaguely to the crowd behind you, referring to the Eminem-dressed Lando, who you guess is currently caught in the thick of.
âXtina?â Iks-tina, he repeats, clearly confused. âI remember hearing⌠somebody saying you were going as a⌠a Christina.â
âChris-tina, Xtina, yeah. Christina Aguilera.â You smile, fingers pinching at the material of your belt. âAnywayâwhere is everyone? Iâve only seen Danielâs costume and then yours.â The recent memory of Dannyâs neon orange traffic cone costume bumping into everybody flashes in your mind.
âSave yourself,â he huffs, smoothing calloused hands over the denim of his jeans. âZhou and Esteban came as Bella and Jacob, Max as a Tifosi. Anywayââhe points to his ensembleââguess yet?â
Your mental images of each cited costume are cut short. âAha! Youâre, um. Yes! Youâre Ken from the Barbie movie,â you crack finally, remembering the revealing denim vest and jeans combo from the film youâd watched four times over in theaters a few months ago. âWow, even your briefs say Ken. Very accurate. Minus the non-bleached hair.â
He tuts and shrugs. âIâm no Alex. Whatâd he come as?â
âHe and Lily matchedâSonny and Cher.â
âLet me guess,â Pierre starts, and already youâre nodding because you can tell heâs going to predict exactly how the night has turned out, âAlex is Cher?â
âWig and sequined dress and all.â You nod, laughing and squinting; Alexâs tall figure, head clad in a long, fringey, black wig, stands out above the rest. âOh, I did see Carlos at the bar. Ricky Martin?â
Pierre really laughs at that, a loud, distinctly French guffaw involuntarily forced past his lip glossed mouth. âWhat the fuck, mate! Ricky Martin?! Heâs El Profesor from La Casa de Papel. You know, Money Heist? Bella ciao? Oh, my God, heâs going to fucking freak if he hearsâheard you said that.â
âHe seriously gave off Ricky Martin vibes,â you defend in-between laughs of your own. âSo thatâs everyone? Ohâoh. Charles! What did⌠I never saw him! He kept telling me how excited he was for his costume, tooâŚâ Just a few hours ago, at thatâa boisterous voice honing into the your voicemail inbox, boasting about a costume while you prepped for the party with Lissie and Lily. Your eyes peruse the room, but the lighting is too dark and vague for you to make out anything you havenât already seen.
âOh. Charles?â Pierreâs voice lilts higher. âUm. Yeaaah. Um.â
You, however, are sufficiently distracted by your own search for him, and you fail to notice Pierreâs clear scrambling attempt to stall you. He takes a long swig of beer and clears his throat. âHeâs just, well, around. I should actuallyâexcuse me, I need to actually go look for him. I owe him a drink.â
âOh? Oh, okay. Wellâbe careful?â
Youâre a bit surprised by his sudden, jolted departure, but bid him a rushed goodbye anyway. He waves back vaguely, his eyebrows furrowed into an expression of worry as he shoves his way back into the crowd and toward the area littered with tables. Itâs only then that Lissie surfaces from the crowd, scratching absently at her nose as she crashes into you with a floaty giggle.
âLis, youâre all sticky.â You place two palms flat against her shoulders and push her off. âAre you high?âÂ
âYes but not drunk.â She giggles again, eyes fluttering.
âOhâthatâs not. Whatever, I guess.â You exhale and cross your arms over your chest. âWhoâve you been with?â She listens, plays with the braid in her hair, matching her getup as Lara Croft.Â
âUm, the deejay. I gave him my number, but heâs actually pretty fucking weird. Come on, I want to pee.â As always, her speech quickens to something inhuman, an effect elicited by alcohol; giving you essentially zero time to react, she loops a hand around yours and drags you with ferocity to the nearest restroom. She moves so aggressively through the thickly-packed crowd you barely have time to react or say hi to people youâre acquainted with en route.
You whiz by the door, and in the rush, you notice Pierre entering the one adjacent with a worried expression etched onto his face. Just minutes ago youâd been conversingâyou wonder why heâs suddenly become privy to worries.
âSo the deejay,â says Lissie, effectively distracting you for the time being. You hum to signify youâre listening, fixing bits of your outfit in the mirror as she kicks different stalls open to judge their cleanliness. âOne, he was dressed up as James Bond. Which is just about the most fucking pretentious thing ever. Two, all he played was Chainsmokers. Youâre telling me this pubâclubâwhateverâin Mexico could only afford to commission this guy? Three, he wasââshe kicks the last door open and a gasp escapes her and morphs into a semi-shriekââa ghost?!â
âGhosted you? Already?â Your eyes, focused previously on re-lining your lips, flits to Lissieâs in the reflection. Sheâs distracted, staring at the contents of a stall with comically wide eyes. âWhatâs up? Sâthat a fucking glory hole or something?â
âNo!â She yells when you approach, immediately lunging forward to pull it shut. âNo. ItâsâI saw a roach. Serves us for going to a fucking⌠pub. Donât go in there, itâsâŚâ She exhales a long breath. âIt was a mama roach and⌠with eggs.â
âWhat are you talking about?â This isnât even a pub, itâs a nightclubâone with a door fee that definitely did not warrant rogue cockroaches in the water closet. âLis, youâre drunk-hallucinating.â Youâre not even sure if thatâs a thing, but you shove past her and push the stall door open again, ready to come face-to-face with, maybe, a sleeping Tinkerbell or a puking black cat. Worst case scenario, shit on the floor; worst-er case scenario, Lissie is right and youâve stepped into a den of roaches.
Weirdest case scenario, though, if thatâs an actual thing: Charles Leclerc seated on the closed toilet seat, face painted white, wearing an all-white ensemble of a large white shirt, shorts, high socks, and sneakers. Heâs got two hands on either side of the wall, as if heâd been preparing to escape; how or to where, youâre clueless. Why heâs here, youâre even more stumped.
His entire face is a stark white, with black smudges of face paint on his forehead (eyebrows, youâre guessing); his hairâs been curled by the humid air at this club, and he looks like himself in all the ways he totally does not, eyes big and caught when yours click onto them.Â
Despite confusion, you chalk it up, as one would rationally do at a party, to intoxication. You spend a few bated breaths staring at him staring at you, his face of pure shock and embarrassment enough to sober up a drunk for a few days. âHi.â You can hear yourself say it, but youâre so caught off-guard and full of confusion it feels alien.
âHey,â he says, wiping four fingers over his stubborn face paint with a smile. The smile and the paint barely fade. âIâm a ghost.â
âI see. Classic.â You pause. âIâm Chr⌠nevermind. Umâare you okay?â
âA bit, uhâa tad bit drunk. I seem to be in the ladiesâ room.â
âYeah, you seem to be,â you recite back to him, amusement quickly overtaking confusion. âI think Pierre was looking for you. Let me go get him. Lis, make sure he doesnâtâŚâ You gesture a puking movement, and the pair watch and listen to your shoes click against the tile, before the door swings open and then shut again.
âCoast is clear.â Lissieâs voice has been lowered to a conspiratorial whisper. âI reckon everyone you know is already looking for you?â
âThis is a disaster.â He rubs frantically at the face paint, but itâs horribly futile. âYou know, I didnât even realize I was in the ladiesâ room until you two came in. She cannot see me like this.â
âShe already fucking has, mate.â Lissie sounds exasperated. âWhose idea was this? If you say Pierre I sweââ
ââPierreââ
ââar to Jesus fucking Christ, CharlesâI canât keep saving you from Pierreâs antics.â She grumbles out a sigh. âWhat are you supposed to be, even? Have youâdid you see how hot she looks? This is like⌠you look like a⌠I canâtââ She lets herself taper off, so disbelievingly shocked at his odd costume.
âIâm Casper the Ghost!â Lissie mentally forms a crude picture of the kid ghost, which looks absolutely nothing like whatâs in front of her. âCasper was opposite Christina Ricci. Pierre told me so.â
âThatâs the dumbest analogy ever, holy Christ. You look like a poster child for someâŚâ She regards him for a moment. âAnemia advert.â
âTake that back.â
âYou donât really have the upper hand here, Charles,â says Lissie with a grimace. âIâm texting Pierre. Are youâdid you even get drunk?â
âNo,â he woes. âI am totally sober. I had to lie. Pierre went to the table and told me that myâthat the costume we plannedâit was wrong, and I justâI ran to the bathroom.â Lissie canât help but laugh at the story, raising her camera to record the incriminating evidence.
Mid-video, Charlesâ white face droops and his painted lips part to ask: âYou think she found me cute?â
â
Charles likes finding things about you. He supposes the first time he realized just how much he liked hearing you talk about yourselfâwhich you rarely didâhappened in SĂŁo Paulo. Heâd been stressing over a spiel to recite in front of a camera, rewriting over words for hours to make everything sound more natural.
Each margin had been hastily written on with pencil, run-on sentences with semicolons in the place of periods. The team scriptwriter didnât do much to make his lines sound more natural and less like theyâd just been spat out of an online translator. You peeked into the media pen and coughed. You donât belong here, do you?
Tch, he clicked his tongue, turning to offer a smile. Iâm working on a script for Sunday. Portugese stuff.
I can help, you responded, walking slowly over toward him. You smiled quietly, approaching slowly like you were waiting for him to greenlight your offer. He did so by pulling a chair out for you, and once you sat you traced a nail over each line, murmuring them under your breath.
You speak Portugese?
You looked up and gave a half-shrug, laughing like you were amused with yourself. Kind of. Itâs not very good, but itâs enough. You resumed your editing and he felt content to stare, admire, watch every movement of your lips align with the syllables of the words. You asked for a pencil and began writing something much cleaner. He couldnât help but let himself be in awe of your intelligence.
You read over the last few lines and turned to face him. Let me guess, you said. You want to make a pun on Ferrari before you say bye.
Ah, he laughs. Yeah.
See, I know you so well, you half-joked, scrawling idle edits on the margins of his script.
He was already looking at you when you turned back to him, seeking his response, agreement, anything. When your eyes met, something caught at your chestâit tugged, tugged, then tugged again, a dull feeling burrowed deep in you. Words failed to wrench themselves free, but once they did, all you could manage was a faintâWhat?
Nothing. He smiled and shook his head, like he was waiting for you to figure it out. You know⌠sometimes, I wish I met you sooner. He does. He wishes he knew you back then, when you first learned Portugese. Or when you were in high school, so you could see just how exponentially awkward he was in his own teenage years. He thinks sometimes that heâs lost too much time, met and liked you too late.
Hm, you breathed out, because you didn't know what else to. I know whyâso you could always have me. As a proofreader. Right?
Hah. The tilt of his laugh was high and mocking, and he stuck his tongue out, as if to punctuate that. He looked away then, like he wasnât ready to say certain things to your face just yet. Quietly he added, Always have you⌠something like that.
â
If you ask Charles what heâs doing hiding in a laundry basket of a luxury hotel in SĂŁo Paulo, he wouldnât be able to answer you, either. Itâs been some time since the disaster that was Caspergate Cancun 2023, and if heâs perfectly honest, he doesnât feel like facing you again for the rest of his life. Pierre, of course, has other plans.Â
All he knows is last night, Pierre suggested he leave a huge vase of roses for you to arrive to in the living room of your hotel; as he planted it in said room, the doorâs lock turned, and he sought a hiding place in the adjacent bedroom. Judging by the prevalent scent of Dior Sauvage, this is Lando Norrisâ room.
Did u get to escape??? Pierreâs text irritates him. At the same time, the light flips on; Charles curls in on himself, remaining perfectly still. Landoâs voice trills through the room. âI didnât leave those roses for either of you,â heâs saying to you and Lissie.
Charles hears you hum. âTheyâre so beautiful.â His heart swells. âI gotta run for a sec, pick up something from Willâs room.â A few seconds pass and the door opens and shuts, which means Charles is currently alone with Lando and Lissie. Which means he needs to plot his escape as soon as he can. Otherwise heâll be caught in the crossfire and much too embarrassed toâ
A foot meets his concealed body and he lets out an oof! as heâs sent flying out of the hamper, along with strewn-around clothes. He keeps his eyes screwed shut, scared shitless and in a fetal position; he only unfurls when a socked foot kicks at his ass. Above him are Lando and Lissie, both extremely confused.Â
âHow did you know I wasâŚ?!â He asks, aghast.
âMy fucking laundry was breathing, mate, sânot that hard to leave alone,â Lando retorts sharply. âWhat are you doing?!â
âI left roses for her,â he explains fruitlessly, gesturing to the vase outside. âBut you came in, and this was the closest hiding place. I was told this would be a great gesture.â
âRight. Where did you even get that advice?â Lando tries to suppress the critical tone in his voice, but judging by Charlesâ embarrassed grimace, heâs failed. Beside him, Lissie makes a hm? noise, goading Charles to answer quicker.
âI got it from.â Charles pauses. âA friend,â he ekes out vaguely.
âNo shit. Who?â
âUmââ Charlesâ eyes are shut. âPierre.â
In unison, Lissie and Lando both release incredulous gasps, throwing their hands up in the air. Lissie points at the mess of clothes in the corner of the room to emphasize her point and asks loudly, with comical cynicism: âThis seemed like proper romantic advice to you?â
âScratch that. Pierreâs words seemed like proper romantic advice to you? His girlfriend isâ!â Lando places a flat palm a few inches off the floor and shakes it a few times to insinuate Kikaâs age, his disbelieving expression growing funnier by the second. âMate!â His voice cracks mid-syllable, though even this mishap seems to be the least crazy thing about tonight.
Charles, burning with humiliation, releases a shaky sigh. âI know! I know!â
âYou donât know!â They shout simultaneously in response, disappointed if anything. Just then the door opens again and your two best friends hurry to throw assorted pieces of laundry on the lying Charles, exiting to make sure you donât suspect anything.Â
âHey,â you say slowly, because theyâre both posed the exact same. âAm I⌠missing something?â
âA shower, girl,â Lando says, and you flip him off before retreating into your room.
Belatedly you ask, âDid you find out who sent those flowers?â
âSome loser, probably,â he calls right back. Charles emerges to poke him accusatorily, but Lando just shrugs. Charles definitely does not have the upper hand here, anyway.Â
âJust get out,â Lissie says, completely done with Charlesâ antics. âAnd stop. Listening. To Pierre.âÂ
He rinses the odor of laundry off him once heâs at his room, but thinks, despite himself, that you called the flowers beautiful.
â
Are youâ
âno. Iâm not. You wiped a hand over your face and caught mascara along with it. Iâm fine, itâs fine.
What he said, it wasnâtâŚ
I said, you turned to face him, eyes rimmed and mouth trembling. You didnât finish your sentence, just tore the microphone off your lapel and buried your face in your hands. There was always going to be a first time. Your first time insulted on a live feed, after the Abu Dhabi weekend, was not any less shocking. You felt small. You felt humiliated.
You didnât want to show Charles any of it. You moved around the green room, picking up shit to throw into your bag. Thank God the season was fucking over, you kept thinking. I feel so, you said, still failing to finish anything you started to say. Youâd been called an annoying bitch by a fan of one of the driversâto your face, as you exited the paddock.
He moved nearer. Charles, you said, a half-sob, and then you were allowing him to crash, allowing him to hug you. Your arms were weak when they wrapped back around him, linking softly in the small of his back. You sobbed hard into his chest until his grey tee was dark with tears. I want out, I just want out.
Youâll lord your career over that prick when youâve made a million dollars doing this, he said. You do it too well to want out. Youâre too smart. Youâre too good. You cried harder, your face hurt and every word felt wrestled unintentionally, like it took too much work to say much at all. Iâm sorry, you said. You should go.Â
No, he said. He held you closer. Not until you feel better.
â
He cries after Abu Dhabi. Bad season, everyoneâs said. You snap a few smiling pictures with Max, who wins, and Lily and Lissie and the lot of them, the people who made the year so great. You notice an absence in all the pictures and you find it in a room in the Ferrari motorhome.
Youâve found you both find solace in words. In reassurance. But youâve also found that your connection enables you both to reassure without having to say anything at all. You sit beside him, lean your head on his shaky shoulder, and wait.
âI was waiting for you to come,â he admits brokenly. âI was just not feeling good.â
âI know,â you respond. âIt was a bad race. Shit strat.â
Heâs quiet. His breaths are ragged and wet and shaky. âWill you stay? Until I feel better?â
You donât move. âIâll stay for longer.â
â
In the kitchen Charles unscrews himself a beer. The sky outside is pink and the sun hides behind faraway mountains, gradually darkening the entire atmosphere, save for the few woolly clouds. Heâs by the patio door so he can spot people in the wide yard: Pierre, exchanging a Frisbee with Lando. Max, Alex, and Lissie engaged in an intense match of Uno.
Theyâre all gathered here in Spain at Carlosâ behest to celebrate the dawn of winter, and the end of the season, Maxâs third championship.
Heâs yet to spot youâheâd been told earlier youâd be lateâbut it doesnât matter. Heâs been feeling uncharacteristically himself all day anyway. He wrote that on his notebook this morning, on the flight here, verbatim. Looked up the word to spell it right and everything. He remembers you saying it, that time in London where you and Lando took him around and annihilated Borough Market before lounging on the grassy knoll of a nearby park. I feel so uncharacteristically happy, youâd joked. The syllables were too stunted and too fast for Charles to nail it. But he feels it now. Uncharacteristic.
He tells everyone heâs fine, though, and does a good job of it. Three beers in and heâs beginning to trick himself into thinking he actually is doing fine. Nobody suspects heâs been feeling empty from such a bad finish to the seasonâthe season that was already bad in itself. He hasnât been feeling his usual drive, his usual appetite. He doesnât know when it will return.
âHere you are.â Carlos has this goofy smile on his face when he bounds into the kitchen, depositing empty dishes at the sink. âListen, I have to tell you something.â
Charles and Carlos have always shared an easy dynamicâtheyâve both always wanted the same thing. Racing has always been at the forefront of their minds. It makes conversation passionate, easy, fun; it was what helped build their now-natural rapport in the first place. âYeah?â He prods, leaning against the counter and tipping fizz into his mouth.
âI invited everyone here to announce⌠something important.â Carlos crosses his arms. âBut I wanted you to be the first to know.â
âMe?â Charles knits his eyebrows and smiles. âWow.â He gulps, cocks his head. âWhat is it, then? Are you switching teams?â
Carlosâ goofy smile grows. âIsa and I are engaged. Iâm retiring next year.â
âYouâyouâreââ Charles laughs and shuts his eyes all at once. âOh, my God, mate! Congratulations!â The overload of information isnât lost on him, but he channels it all into a hug. âAre you really retiring, though? I mean. Wow, this is amazing newsâbutââ
âI was sure as soon as I asked,â Carlos says squarely, smiling as if heâs conjured an image of Isaâs smiling face (which is likely the case). âAs soon as she said yes. As soon as I bought the ring!â He laughs aloud, so overwhelmed with happiness of recalling everything. âIâm so glad you were the first person I told.â
âBesides Lando,â Charles says, because he knows itâs true.
âBesides Lando.â Carlos smiles. âIâm⌠dios, Iâm happy. I always knew Iâd have something to look forward to after racing.â They hug again, and then he clambers past Charles and into the patio, where he resumes the façade of being unengaged and still a driver. Left behind, Charles thinks over it himself. What does he have to look forward to after racing? All his life, racing is all that ever existed to him.Â
The announcement comes eventuallyâwhen itâs dark out, intermittent stars white and twinkly against the black above. Charles has once again turned into a blushy mess because you arrived a few hours prior, wearing a lovely dress and with your hair down in messy waves and you said hi to him earlier without him approaching first. They present a stupid, but very Carlos-and-Isa ring-shaped cake to announce it, and somebody queues up music and everyoneâs cheering. Of course everyoneâs cheeringâitâd be impossible for this announcement to not come with bouts of yelling and cheering and goodbyes to Carlos, who accepts them with glee andâdare he sayâexcitement.
Charles remembers their first year as teammates, the jokes theyâd made about needing to beat the other out. For both of them, he recalls, itâs only ever been the drive to race. He didnât think Carlos would even entertain the idea of retiring yet. He wonders when he will. The thought of it alone is enough to send a well of anxiety run deep into himâwhich happens after he congratulates the couple, so he excuses himself to the empty outdoors area to get fresh air back into him.
He didnât mean it, but he finds you already there. âHi,â you say when he slides the door shut. âYou okay?â
âJust⌠yeah, Iâm fine.â You smell faintly like smoke. âItâs crazy, huh. Everyoneâs⌠moving on.â
âSo Carlos told everyone, then,â you say, pursing your lips and waiting for his response. He closes his eyes and lets a soft exhale escape him, warm air out and fresh air in, a welcome change from the heady atmosphere in the party. âI knew. I bought that God awful cake. I kept saying get a normal one but they both wanted it to be shaped like a ring.â You punctuate your sentence with a crisp laugh, a stunted exhale of air to break the tension.
You have a natural sway over words, graceful and beautiful and commanding, something he only wishes he could be. For so long heâd been told the feedback loop of one and the same thing: youâre good. Youâre the best. Youâre going to be the next big thing. And this season had just⌠aggravated every single insecurity heâs picked up in his years of racing. He wishes sometimes heâd been told something else: you suck. Youâre normal. Youâre irrelevant. Then at least he wouldnât exist in some odd panopticon of feeling on top of the world and yet looking at it from the bottom of a pitch black abyss.
âYeah,â he says instead, wringing his hands. He mimics the wrist movements heâs made to do during gym hours. âItâs wild howâI mean, not really wild, but. I just canât⌠even picture my life after racing.â
âYouâre young, thatâs warranted,â you laugh. âYouâre also⌠I mean, even if you drop out of racing tonight, itâs not like youâre going to become dirt poor or anything. You could become a bloody orthodontist and people will still love you.â
âWill they?â
He didnât mean to say it aloud but out it comes, garbled and rushed and heâs a bit embarrassed for sounding like a child in front of somebody he finds so beautiful. The silence is suspended and dry, and for a minute all he hears and feels is the slow rise and fall of his chest. To somehow mend the vulnerability, he tries again. âItâs notâI just think Iâll be lonely if I decide to stop racing.â
The fact that Carlos can say with so much ease that heâs willing to drop his career to ensure his pending marriage lasts is almost terrifying, because Charles knows he wants that. He knowsâheâs always knownâthat he wants that intimacy, that realness, but for it to come at the cost of something heâs known for so long is so scary itâs almost a dealbreaker.
âLonely?â You echo, voice tinged with concern. âCharlesââ
âLonely.â
He says it with an edge to his voice, so final, so steadfast. Loneliness is what heâs always feared and he knows, with a deep drawling punch to his gut, that loneliness is what will come if he decides to stop racing. Even if heâs tired. Even if heâs so pent up with frustration and loss and anger. Racing is all heâs ever known, itâs all he isâwhen heâs not tied to it, who is he? âLike no one⌠like Iâm just standing in front of what Iâm supposed to be, and when people see me, thatâs all they seeâwhatâs behind me. Right through me.â
âWell, youâre off racing right now,â you respond, trodding carefully. âSo, well. Do you feel that way?â
He knows what you mean: itâs winter break, so heâs not driving or doing some form of it every single day. And he knows in turn what to answer: no, not really, he doesnât really feel detached from it because thereâs a low anticipation in his belly that tells him heâll be doing it all again soon. But he chooses to interpret it differently; differently, but not falsely.
âI th⌠I donât feel lonely,â he says, âwhen I talk to you. You see me.âÂ
Your stomach drops and your heart begins to pulse a mile a minute, knuckles tightening where theyâve gripped onto the wooden post of the patio. You can feel the air in your lungs pass through every divot of your body as it escapes and arrives in long, shaky breaths. Heâs looking at you, his eyebrows knitted like he wantsâneeds an answer, if youâd be kind enough to please give him one.Â
âIâŚâ You bite your lip, every thought in your head at odds with the other.
Time feels like rubber, like itâs been stretched and manipulated and Carlos is ducking out to announce that itâs time to blow out candles on the stupid ring-shaped cake and youâve taken too long to respond and your body feels too heavy but your heart feels too light and your eyes are blinking, open and shut and open again, and you feel like the wind could honestly blow you away now because Charles has given you a neutral nod and left you alone again, to contemplate the weight of what heâs finally, finally admitted, tonight here under the sky of Spain.
You move a hand over your hair, watch him walk away. The words lodge themselves in your throat, but theyâre there.
â
One minute after you realized you liked Charles, you swallowed the feelings until they were barely decipherable.
In happened in Dublin, at a pub on St. Paddyâs Day, when youâd emerged fresh out of a breakup with the most arseholic Irishman youâd ever had the displeasure of meeting. And funnily enough, it happened without Charlesâ presence. Youâd spent the day at Liamâs, hours of fighting over so many thingsâthe growth of your career and the decimation of his, where your relationship had soured, why you never came to visit him, Charles, the sodding bloke you like so muchâuntil finally, you took your things and left.
Wise, because you mightâve honestly gone insane if you stayed a minute longer, attuning your ears to the deafening feedback loop of his voice. Also decidedly unwise, because you had a piece of luggage and barely any battery, in a full city of people you didnât know at all.
There was no chance Liam would let you return, and no chance you wanted to, for that matterâthe fact still stood, though, that you needed to kill the night before your flight to France left at 6AM. You entered the first pub you heard, deposited your bag at the coat check for an extra couple of euros, and accepted the first pint thrust into your hand and first leprechaun hat plopped atop your head.
In between watching people compare how they poured Guinness pints, Sinead OâConnor songs, and exchanging headdresses with a random stranger, you found yourself impressingly drunk. The Irish did it too well.
A university student stumbled past your stool, tears in her eyes; she stopped to steal a shot of whiskey lying unattended on the bar. You looped a hand around her wrist and stared at her menacingly. Manners?!
Fuck manners, she said wetly, wrenching every word out with great effort. Nobody paid either of you any attention. I just caught my best friend and boyfriend kissing. Her accent was unmistakably Irish and was stronger with the tears.
Oh, you said, loosening your threatening grip. Sorry.
Donât be. Iâm sorry I could ever be so stupid, she said, aghast, before finally stalking outside the pub. Half an hour later, you wound up at a table of thirty-somethings, all belting along to a folky sounding song.
Drunkenly you slurred out, I thought it was a stereotype.
What was, love? One of them paused her singing, dipping down to listen to you properly. Your cheek was smushed against the varnished wood, moving with every syllable you eked out.
The songs. You sound like⌠you belong in the 19th century.
She laughed at that, surfacing and yelling something to the band onstage you couldnât quite decipher. The song reached its peak, loud and getting the whole crowd singing along, before fading into a familiar opening. Sâthis better? She asked, her voice slightly raised above the guitar.
You looked up. I liked the other one too, to be fair. Mânot a fucking anti-Irish.
Nobody said that, love. Come sing. She hauled you upward, exaggerating her arm swinging in the air so youâd follow suit, which you did. You hummed the opening, eyes fluttering open and closed. You imagined opening them again and finding Charles across the room, already looking, with the same charming, boyish smile on his face that came to you as comfort.
You thought back to the dinner in London, the feeling of his shirt against your shoulder, the way heâd gotten you so easy and laughing and babbly, something you never got with Liam. You squeezed your eyes shut and exhaled raggedly. Fuck.
Lingerâll do that to you, your companion mused. Around you, the entire pub sang along to the song that served as the backdrop to your all-encompassing romantic epiphany. Missing a lover, huh?
No, just⌠You opened your eyes, watched the band sing out the rest of the prechorus before they slid into the next verse. A new kind of air had crept over the pub, one that exemplified just how much this song could mean to anyone, no matter who. You shut them again and saw Charles. The green of his eyes, mossy on some days and bright on others. The moles on his face. The grooves of his hand, the way it wrapped around things like pens, mics, bottles, your fingers. His voice, how he curved around words. He always knew exactly what you meant even if it took you ages to get to the point, even if you felt like you didnât know what you meant exactly.Â
You opened your eyes. Suddenly fights with Liam didnât matter. Whatever little sympathy you had left evaporated as you listened to the lyrics and realized, with a damning force, that you were thinking of Charles. And this was not weak, this was not vague, this was a strong thing that took you off your feet like a gust of wind, hurtling you out of the pub. You thought of every time your eyes met his, both of you already laughing at something else present. Every time he saw you at the end of a busy work day and asked if you were doing alright.
Just this guy, I suppose. His nameâs⌠yeah. Weâve been friends for ages. Heâs really very talented. Very kind. Your voice was drowned out by the music but you didnât intend for anything to be heard, anyway. And heâs the smartest person Iâve ever met. He always knows what to say. Heâs not in Dublin tonight, not even in Ireland, for Godâs sake.Â
Heâs your boyfriend, then?
You closed them slowly. No. Tâwouldnât be very smart to date him.
Is he an arse?
No either. Itâs just too late.
Iâm sorry, love.
Donât be, you mused, eyes still shut as Linger came to a close. Iâm sorry I could ever be so stupid.
â
Charles should be in Monaco. You should be in London. But at four-thirty PM, leaning against the counter of a tiny cafĂŠ in Dublin, you cross paths for the first time in weeks, and everything tilts on its axis.
He notices you first, because he hears you thank the barista quietly. Itâs not your reporter voice, not the one you put one when youâre interviewing him or his teammate or his fellow athletes. But itâs your real one, and itâs the one he thinks he could hear through a snowstorm.
A tuxedo-clad man exits and suddenly youâre there. Youâre wearing a white top, low neck and thin straps covered by a cardigan. Youâre sliding coins into the pocket of your jeans and he watches your hand freeze, drags his eyes back up to you, finds youâre already looking.
You look beautiful, he thinks. You put on a lot of makeup for the cameras, and you looked gorgeous, but seeing you like thisâcaught, almost, in a moment you didnât expect to see himâyou look unbelievably beautiful. He aches with it.Â
âYou look well,â he says first when he opens the cafĂŠ door for you. âWhatâs your business in Ireland?â
âAcquainting myself with my new coworker.â You wait for him to follow and squint when the sun hits your eye. âWeâve been here three weeks, fly back to London next Monday. You?â
âIt does seem weird for me to be here,â he observes absently. âI needed a change of pace, I think. Gear up for the season.â He shakes his half-full cup of coffee. âWhere are you staying?â
âJust up ahead.â A slow silence overcomes you both. âCome over. I have beer. I know you canât be fucked to have coffee.â He laughs and nods, following you through the road and up into a flatâa BNB, if heâs guessing. Thereâs a tiny landing and then stairs to a wider living area, where you proceed to unwrap the croissant youâd gotten a few minutes earlier. You chuck it into the fridge and produce two bottles of beer in one go.
âSit,â you gesture to the spot beside you, and he sits himself there. âWe can talk. We should.â
Youâve shrugged your cardigan off, and he observes every detail of your exposed skin, the way your hair layers atop it. Right as he opens his mouth to respond, a blond girl enters, rings of mascara caking her eyes and a wine glass twiddled in-between thumbs. Sheâs talking her head off and only pauses when she spots Charles.
âHhhhâŚiiii.â
âSalut.âÂ
âYouâre Charles?â She notices how close the two of you are seated together.
âYes,â he says.Â
âCharles, this is Robynâmy coworkerâs friend. And by extension my friend.â You pat her knee and point to Charles to get them properly introduced. âShe leeches off the apartment.âÂ
âYou love me,â she retorts, mockinglyâbut sweetly. âAnyway, sorry to intrude. I was just on the phone with my situationship.â She rolls her eyes. âDoes he think I give two shits about goodnight texts? It feels impossible to be romantically satisfied these days.â
Charles grunts. âI hear that,â he says, just to make Robyn feel less excluded. You get up then, to fuck around at the kitchen sinkâhe suspects youâre not actually doing choresâbut you come back with wet hands and you sit yourself across Charles, on the loveseat, instead of next to him.Â
âThe thing is, right,â she gulps wine, âthereâs such a thing with dating now,â Robyn says, not missing a beat, her Geordie accent curving round the syllables with a distinctive twang. She stares at the opaque red liquid in her glass, like that will supplement her with more words. âLike a deal. A big deal. Everyoneâs making this huge thing out of it, and itâs like, canât we be in our twenties and fuck around occasionally?â She laughs, a high-pitched, tapered noise.
You shift from where youâre seated, buried into the material of the seat. Itâs quiet and beginning to touch awkward, so you speak in a rough voice: âI dunno, I kind of⌠get it.â
âOh do you, now,â she responds, voice saturated with wine. âNo, itâsâI was joking. Of course you would, youâre absolutely fucking gorgeous, is all.â
Suddenly you feel all too seen and inclined to touch a fingertip to your cheek, feather light. You blink so you wonât feel tempted to meet Charlesâ eyes, because you feel them on you. âItâsâthank you, I mean. Itâs nothing to do with that. I just always feel itâs impossible to find someone who loves you. I feel like Iâm not very lovable.â
âYou? Youâre bloody fucking likable!â Robynâs laugh is so disbelieving you find yourself semi-convinced. âYouâre a bit intimidating, yeah, but youâre lovable as fuck, babe.â
You double down anyway, voice thin. âRight. I donât think Iâm very good at being⌠affectionate.â
âHah. Bull. Youâre affectionate with⌠with Charles! Iâve heard you talk about him to Jane.â
She turns to Charles before you have the chance to defend yourself. To him she asks: âIs she affectionate with you?â
But itâs basically rhetorical. Everyone speculates, sees the way you two bend the line between friendship and romance, the care with which you treat Charles, the way you two understand each other in ways impossible for anyone else in your orbit. Fuck if itâs not overtly physical. Robynâs known you three weeks and has never even met Charles until seven minutes ago and already sheâs sensed the energy, the difference, even if she hasnât seen you do so much as embrace.
âItâsââ You say and say too quickly. You wind up slowing your speech so you donât sound too defiant and lean backwards, willing yourself to relax. âItâs⌠different with Charles.â
âDifferent?â She repeats, miming every dip and rise of your voice. âWhy?â
âWeâre close.â You refuse to meet his eyes. âBeâbecause weâre good friends. I feel⌠things are⌠just. Theyâre different. Thatâs all, really.â Barely satisfied with the answer you eked out, you cross your arms over your torso like itâll help shield you from the interrogation going on. Briefly you let your eyes fall on Charles; heâs reclined, eyes all over the place, blinking in quick flashes.
âBut you admit it, at least?â She smiles. âThat youâre affectionate, I mean.â
âOnly withâŚâ you taper off, unwanting to dig yourself a deeper hole. âRight. Sure, yeah.â
âWell then,â she says, eyebrows raising as she dows the rest of her glass. She sets it down on the low wooden table with a clink. âIâll get going. Donât let me keep you two from shagging or whatever.â
âWe donât fâshag,â you interrupt, voice sharp. âAnd youâre not keeping us at all. Me, at all.â
Us sounds so exclusive, you realize as it leaves your lips. Us. It tastes like sour cherries on your tongue, bleeds all over. Robyn gives you a look. In response, you insist on seeing her out, leaving Charles at the sofa, elbows on his knees, hands toying with the neck of the beer bottle. He can make out faint words but he doesnât try translating or deciphering them, just listens to your muffled voice peek through every few words. You sound amused, also accused, also endearedâa bit irritated. You end it with a laugh.
You clamber back in after a few minutes and find him at the top of the stairs.
âSorry,â you wave off, rolling your eyes to fend Robynâs earlier interrogation efforts of. âSheâs very strong-willed.â You climb the stairs, your striped linen shorts folding with every movement of your legs. Finally you make it to the top, on the second-to-the-last stair, staring up at him.
âYou know,â he says, watching you ascend to the top finally, but youâre still staring upward. âYou should know.â
âShould know what?â
âI missed you.â
You inhale and are grateful to find the air is all him. âI missed you, too.â
âIn a different way.â
âMe, too,â you echo again, voice quiet. âI missed you. It feels like Iâve missed you all my life.â
He can hear your still, controlled breathing. âThank you for seeing me. Even when, you know, itâs⌠hard. You know what I mean.â
âI do,â you say. âItâs never difficult, notâŚâ With you.
He leans down and captures your mouth in his then, like itâs a thirst heâs always needed quenched. You allow it, kiss him back like youâve needed this your entire life. His lips are chapped, but you donât mindâDublinâs cold. He kisses like heâs smiling, like heâs happy, and you think maybe thatâs not far off. He moves downward, to your jaw; lower, along the column of your throat, around your collarbones, cornering you against the wall, letting you lean against it.
Charlesâ kisses are light and soft, but also heavy, like heâs trying to waste as little time as possible. You sigh, feeling light, feeling ecstatic. He puts two hands on either side of your face, presses your foreheads together, and shuts his eyes.Â
You feel the divots of his fingers on your hip, your waist, places heâs never touched before. âIâm sorry I left,â you breathe into him. âBack in Spain. In Madrid. I wanted to think about it. About what you said. About everything, about you.â
âIâm glad I found you here, then.â
You tiptoe to kiss him again, because now that youâve had it once youâre terrified you wonât have it again. In-between kisses he picks you up, cages you fully against the wall, and you breathe shaky little exhales. It builds up quicker and harder; you feel his cock at your hip and shiver, eyelashes fluttering. âUpstairs,â you say breathlessly.
He likes knowing you want this, because heâll give you whatever you want. Heâd fuck you for hours. Have you shaking, eking out moans of his name. Heâd whisper praise up and down your ear. He wants this just as much, if not more.
âI want you, so much,â you exhale when he lies you both down on your bed. âSo much.â
He tugs your shorts off, then your panties. He doesnât usually lack self-restraint, but he thinks heâs never felt this much temptation in his life. Heâs so hard. He brings one hand to his thigh and squeezes his dick through his pants, but it doesnât provide him with any kind of relief. Youâre needy already, whimpering, mind dizzy. He slides a finger up your slit and watches you screw your eyes shut.
Slowly he sinks in, watches you accustom to the stretch. âWanted this,â you breathe out.
He thrusts in further, feels your warm cunt stretch around him, feels your breaths get hotter and quicker against his lips. But he takes it nice and slow, so he can feel every little ridge inside of you as you take all of him. âYou like it?â
You nod, too dumbed down to speak. âGood girl. Pretty, pretty girl.â
Heâs wanted this for so long, fucking you deep and slow and desperate. He thrusts harder, watches you unravel and your hot breaths pick up in pace. He reaches down, smears wetness around your clit as your thighs begin to shake. Your pretty, flushed face is enough to send him into overdrive, your eyes rolling back as he goads you into orgasm.
Youâre still cumming around him when he takes a shaky breath, pulls you tightly back against him, and lets the pleasure take over. He fucks you full, rides his orgasm out while you ride yours outâburies his dick all the way inside, so each spurt fills your contracting pussy up.
He pulls out and collapses beside you, pressing his lips to your shoulder before lying on his back. âIâll clean you up in a minute.â Itâs quiet for a second, just you two breathing.
Then: âI did, I did think about it,â you say, voice reedy. âI thought about you.â
âYeah?â He watches you blink at the ceiling, lets you clasp your hands onto his.
âAbout me, too.â You open your eyes and stare into the green.
âDâyou want this?â
âBelieve me,â you say, threading your fingers into his tightly. Your hairâs fussed from the sex. âI do. Butââ
His heart drops.
âI donât want to⌠I want you to notâŚâ You sigh. âYou know, I like seeing you. I like being that. I like knowing I make you feel good. And I want you to know you⌠you make me feel amazing. Like you and I⌠we understand each other.â You pause. âSometimes I feel like youâre the only person who understands every inch of me.â
âDitto,â he says, and you smile.
âI look up to you, you know? I donât want you to anchor yourself onto me. I want you to realize that on your own. Youâre smart. Youâre a great driver with a shitty fucking team I hated reporting on last season.â He laughs shakily. âYou know I look up to you. You know⌠you know I love you.â
âI do. I love you.â
âI always have. It wasnât⌠it didnât always make itself clear, but I always have. And I know I always will.â You smile. âWeâll be in different cities, in separate timezones, but if we survived the years of not telling each other how bloody fucking much we liked each other, this is nothing. When weâve sorted ourselves out, weâll know the right time to finally call this what it is.â
Heâs never thought of himself as a writer, but his notebooks might beg to differ. Many times youâve told him yourself that he has an affinity for describing things, especially when he lets go of language as a limitation. He wonders what youâd say if you knew the amount of times heâs tried to write about you. Careful letters or typefaces, in an effort to form a coherent picture of you, the way he sees you, the way he loves you. But heâs so scared he tears the pages off before they get too intimate, too personal, crossing the border from having a crush on you to being in love with you.
For once heâs not. He nods. Itâs bittersweet, but itâs a segue to a better ending. He moves a hand over your hair and holds you close.
âYou could never be unlovable,â he says, pressing a kiss to your forehead because finally, he can. âI mean it.â
#f1#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc imagines#charles leclerc drabble#charles leclerc smut#f1 x reader
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Deeper for You
Summary: (5.1 k) It's your annual beach trip with the crew from Hawkins, something you've all been doing together your whole adult life after life forced everyone to part ways. You're all close, but this year, an accidental encounter in the outdoor shower makes you get a little closer with one person in particular.
This is self indulgence at its finest. Fresh off my last week at the beach this summer, I needed a little Beach Steve in my life to tide me over.
Steve x Reader, NSFW 18+ Accidental exposure, friends to lovers, breast play, female oral, fingering, dirty talk encouraged, a little orgasm denial, maybe a spank and unprotected intercourse in the shower.
Crystal water. Crystal skies. Beach chairs circled around umbrellas and coolers. Crisp beers slipped in aging koozies and passed around like old times. You and your friends have been doing this for years. Ever since goals and lives and even some wives have taken the group here and there, Nancy started organizing this annual beach trip for the group from Hawkins. Years and miles have nothing on deep seeded trauma, she said once, in a too cheerful voice despite it's truth.
The heat of the sand between your toes and the smell of suntan lotion have become a comfort to you, just knowing you're back there with your closest friends. As you all creep closer to thirty than you'd like, this week never fails to make you feel nostalgic, youthful and forget all of your problems because it never feels like an ounce of time has passed with any of these people.
This year Nancy had to upgrade the rental - more rooms for yet another married couple in the mix, Eddie adding a wife - a little too sweet but just enough sass for him - into the fold. It was your first time meeting her, really meeting her, because no bride has the time for new friendship on their wedding weekend, and you've had such a nice week spending time with her. Chairs in the sand by the waterline together with a book most afternoons, leaving the raucous energy that comes after some morning beers as background noise to your fantasies.
"What are you two ladies reading over here anyway" Steve pokes at your shoulder on his way down to the water to cool off.
"They're fantasy novels, Steve. Naughty books, if you must know." You tease back, Eddies wife blushing beside you at your brazen honestly.
"Naughty books? Like love stories where they kiss and share a bed?"
"No Steve, like '... And then she felt the tips of his finger circle her clit before toying with her folds and the wetness pooling between her thighs. Edging her, pulling her closer but never giving her cunt what she really wants'" you read in an exaggerated and breathy voice direct from your page, picking up right where you left off. "That, Steve, is Naughty Books. "
"Shit. Okay. Well I'll leave you two to it, then. What the fuck." and he trots off into the waves. Sunkissed skin a perfect contrast to the white, foaming waves he's now floating in.
"So, that⌠you guys have a thing before or something?" Eddie's wife asks softly. So sweet, you can't even be mad at her for it.
"Steve?" You laugh, "No-no no. Just go way back "
"Oh I'm so sorry" she squeaks out, "I just thought⌠I mean you guys. Nevermind."
"Don't worry about it. We're all a little too close for comfort sometimes. I get it. We just have always gave each other shit as long as I've known him, that's all."
Later that night, the whole group gathers in the back of the house around a huge built in fire pit, all taking turns sharing, giving updates about life and work and families.
Late nights have been happening all week around this pit, but tonight is cool, and the Sangria Robin and Max mixed up is keeping you chilled.
"Hey, honey. You finally quit or do you want to join us over here?" Steve calls over to you, beckoning to the group of smokers over on the bench seat to the left of the fire.
"Every time I try⌠someone like you offers me a smoke and here I am again." You shrug as you lean over to snag the pack of cigarettes from Steve's outstretched hand before taking a seat. You slide out a slim cigarette and pull the lighter from it's spot in the back, lighting up and passing it back, kicking your feet out on the coffee table in front.
"Someone like Steve, what's that supposed to mean? You hurling insults again?" Johnathan teases.
"No, no. Byers, shut the fuck up. Lemme enjoy this sweet nicotine with my friends in peace, okay?" You roll your eyes, not actually knowing what you meant either, before shooting a look at Max sitting with the group. "Since when did you sit on the smokers bench? Huh?"
"Don't start with me mom. You've tried to quit four times a year for the past 10 years, so I don't even wanna hear it from you." The redhead sasses back.
Such a beautiful, self assured young women she's grown into, despite having such poor eyesight fromâŚeverything that happenedâŚyou have always had a soft spot for Max, and she for you. The glasses she wears are thick, despite years of corrective surgeries, but they don't take an ounce away from how lovely she's grown to be.
"Yeah yeah, just shut up and enjoy it. I bet Lucas hates it. Doesn't he? Goodie two shoes." You quip back and Max giggles in agreement, both of you taking a long drag as a follow up.
"You two man-eaters are trouble." Steve jabs.
"Excuse me, man-eaters? The one who has been dating the same guy since middle school and me, who goes on what, maybe 4 dates all year? Yeah total man-eaters, Steve."
After finishing your smokes, you all rejoin the group, playing dollar games of cards and dice, laughing the night away at bad luck and bad jokes. El has been banished to watching over participating and when Eddie's wife asks why, the mutters and mumbling of a wide variety of excuses poured out.
"It's uh - against her religion!" straight from Dustin's mouth won out, mostly because it was the loudest. So now you're all pretending El is Muslim, and that's definitely not going to last the rest of the week.
It's nearing two am as you pad up the stairs, pockets 10 dollars deeper, sand still clinging to your feet just barely and Steve's button up on your shoulders from when he passed it to you to quell your chill. Just like every other night of the trip, you sleep like a baby, tucked in a soft mattress with softer sheets and the blanket of a decent buzz still coursing through your bloodstream.
The next day is the last on the shore and after a late start and breakfast cooked up by Nancy and Johnathan to sop up the hangovers the day goes on much like the rest before it. Relaxing in beach chairs and blankets, music softly humming from a boom box in the shade of the umbrella, balls being tossed in a friendly game of touch football in the loose sand by the dunes.
The tide was rough today and swept you and Eddie's girl away on your chairs once before you slipped your books back in your beach bag and decided if you can't beat it, join it. Frolicking in the waves together, the rest of the group is shortly behind you joining in.
It's not five minutes until Eddie is tackling his wife into the crashing waves, rolling her dramatically in the lapping waves and sand. Max and El are jumping through crashing waves, hand in hand trying to make it past the crest and to where it is calm. Some of the boys are sitting in the sand watching and enjoying the cool breeze you catch when you're closer to the sea.
You, well, you were enjoying yourself wholeheartedly. That is until you're making your way back to shore and a huge wave creeps up behind you and slams you to the ground. Water currents tossing you around a bit like a ragdoll, it's a moment before strong arms pull you up and out, wiping your hair out of your face and brushing the wet globs of sand off you as you regroup. It's Steve who's got you and brings you back to shore, where you flop down on the sand together and burst out in laughter after you're both sure that you're alright, making it even harder to catch your breath.
The day at the beach was way more sandy than usual because of it all, sitting in the sand, being thrown around by gritty waves and soupy sand finding it's way intermingling with your bathing suit. You just can't wait till the end of the day to shower and hose off, so you dip away to hop in the rinse shower along the side of the property. Door swung shut, you run the water cold so it's as refreshing as it is a welcome rinse to your body where the sand is sticking and scratches.
Hair slicked back by the cool droplets, you're realizing quickly that a simple rinse won't rid your swimsuit of all of the caked in sand. Maneuvering your emerald green one piece to shake free the grit of the ocean, you're making progress as you drop your wide set straps off your shoulders and start working out the sand from your upper half.
It's just then that Steve must have had the same idea, and he's traipsing through the door of the shower himself, only to find you, strap down, left breast fully exposed, tan lines of your right crisp and leaving nothing to the imagination the way the suit is bunching down, and your hands coaxing the water over them from the low pressure showerhead to work off the sand.
"Holy fuck!" You both yell at the same time.
Yours an exclamation. A "Holy FUCK!" A barked out reaction to the surprise. The admonishment of your friend who doesn't seem to pay a goddamn mind to anything going on around him or he would have heard the shower tap on and running when he approached.
But his⌠Well, his was a statement. A "Holy. Fuck." Drawn out. A deep and gravely comment made to acknowledge the surprise he's found. More of an interest than an intrusion.
So when you reached to cover yourself and hide from embarrassment as a knee jerk reaction, he didn't make quite as quick a move to leave you be. He lingered, just enough for you to notice and under his breath whispered out again "Holy fuck."
Adequately covered, or at least enough that you can feel functional at this point, you look at him to quip "Are you just gonna stare or what?" And you expect him to snap out of his titty haze and leave you be to shake out the rest of your sand trap, but he doesn't.
Instead he asks, "Well, is that an invitation?"
Your eyes narrow at him, and he shrugs in reaction. "You can't be serious, Steve. Get outta here."
"I save you, and this is the thanks I get?" He teases, and you can't help but see how his eyes, blown out and black, don't move from your body when he says it.
"Steve." You say, quietly.
"Yeah?"
"I can thank you later." comes out just above a whisper.
"I think I'd rather you thanked me now."
When you don't argue back, or say anything for that matter, he takes that as enough of an answer as he needs. He knows you, and he knows that you have no problem telling someone to take a hike, so if you're not yelling at him like he's a small boy who got his hand caught in the cookie jar, he knows you're inviting him to take a bite.
So he's inside the shower quicker than your mind can even catch up to what's happening. He's crowding your space and reaching backwards to do the one thing you forgot to do yourself, hook the damn lock. You're pretty sure this man hasn't moved his eyes from you since the moment the door opened and at this point, you're meeting his gaze.
A sweeping hand, under your ear and landing on the nape of your neck is what shakes you out of your daze and before you know it his lips are on yours. It's a bruising thing, the way he presses them into yours, pulling you closer still by where his hand is cupping your head with his broad hand. You come up for air just a second before he backs off and you find yourself, open mouthed and smiling into his lips, still pressing into you. "Fuck. Honey. I- you okay? With this? I don't wanna⌠"
"I know I tell you this all the time, but this is different. Steve, you fuckin talk too much. Shut. Up." You say, emphasizing your words with two little tugs to his own hair where your hands have snaked around, too.
And he takes this welcome advance as an opportunity to wrap his other hand around you, up and under your arm, resting at the center of your back. Pressing together, you're so close. Impossibly so, and every little tick of the hip or twitch of the lips can be felt by the other instantaneously. He's testing you out but getting bolder by the second when he experimentally rolls his hips just a bit before coaxing your legs a bit wider to slot his knee in between. You gasp out at the feeling of him against you and involuntarily find yourself rolling your cunt against his thigh.
"Ah-oh fuck. Shit. Steve." You squeak out, as you look down to see that he's tucked up his swim shorts high enough that your grinding on his exposed thigh. Bristly hair on his legs commingling with the scratch of the sand and sea salt on your own thighs.
"C'mon, honey. You came in here to get clean. Me too. Lemme help you, yeah? '
Nodding your permission, he gently slips his fingers under the still loose straps of your suit, coaxing them down further, fingers ghosting over your arms as he works them down.
You've been doing this trip for years, and you swear the last thing you ever thought would happen was having Steve fucking Harrington peeling off your wet swimsuit in the shower. "You sandy all over, huh? Me too. Gotta rinse you off." he says, as he's reaching up for the shower head, detaching it from its base and bringing it down in between the two of your chests. Holding it there for a moment, he seems to consider this whole thing for the first time. "You-your good, right? I mean, I trust you. Do you trust me? "
"Yeah Steve, I do." You say, pressing your forehead to his and blinking away droplets gathering on your eyelashes.
He pulls the rest of your swimsuit away from where it's suctioned on your tummy and works it down your body, dropping heavy and wet on the shower floor. Once it's out of his way, he's back on your lips, sucking in your bottom lip just as you feel the cool water hitting your clit. Steve moves the shower head gently but purposely around your whole cunt, paying attention to your sensitive bud between passes through your folds. "Gotta get you cleaned up, huh? Need you clean for me. For what I'm gonna do next." He teases and you moan at his words.
Not exactly sure what he has planned just yet, you let him keep working your pussy clean and with every second of the pulsing jets of water hitting your clit rhythmically. "Yeah, baby I think you're all set." He states, replacing the shower head where it belongs and reaching his free hand down to rub through your folds, checking to be sure you're comfortable and free of that pesky sand.
When he's met with yet another whimper he's immediately dropping to his knees on the wet planks of the shower floor "Can I please, please taste you. Please."
"I didn't take you as one to beg, Harrington." You whisper out the tease.
"I will for this - for you. God, would you just answer me?"
You look down at him and nod but he wants your words instead, commanding you to speak up. And so you do, you gasp out confirmation just as his lips latch on to your already sensitive clit. He suckles there a little bit, before moving to make his tongue wide and flat coaxing noises from you that he doesn't want to forget the sound of.
He throws your thigh over his shoulder, giving him deeper, more angled access to your cunt, working you, moving it in and left to right. You cry out as his nose nudges at your clit while he slips a finger in up to his second knuckle and the cry turns silent as he keeps up his ministrations. Droplets of water are tickling down your chest and stomach, soaking his hair and face where he stays tucked in between your thighs. He shakes his head back and forth tapping at your clit with his movement and making you see stars.
Adding in another finger, he keeps lapping at your pussy, taking breaks to nip at the place where your thighs meet your sex and back again. He licks off a trail of water along the seam of your leg before making his way back to your center. Scissoring his fingers, he groans right into you and the vibration of it all drives you wild. "God, you fuckin taste like heaven. So good." And he dives back in, running his wide tongue along your entrance, drawing it front and upward toward your clit.
This time he pauses and presses his tongue up into the base of your clit, holding it there just as he presses both long fingers up and into your spongy spot, freeing the most wanton sound yet from deep within your throat. It spurs him on to keep going, pulsing that tongue and stroking that spot within. You're tensing and shaking under his strong grip and soft tongue, leg still hiked high over him, water cascading around the both of you. You're tumbling over the edge quickly after that.
In a bit of a daze and with wobbly knees, you swing your leg back down off his shoulder and bring him up towards you by his ears, wanting to taste yourself on his tongue in ways you never have before, and he looks beautiful like that. Eyes wide and wanton, hair dripping wet down his hair spattered chest, jaw slack in his own lust and pleasure, lips a deep pink and swollen from working you up down there. You bring him up fully to meet your lips and groan into his mouth, your taste heady and salty and beachy.
"I think you're clean" he laughs out as he pulls back just slightly and you can't help but bark out a laugh back. He takes the opportunity to latch on to your neck and bites at the skin under your ear.
In that moment you decide you're not done with him.
Tugging at the ties of his swim trunks, Steve pulls back to look at you. "N-no, we don't have to."
You hear his words but you also feel the hardness underneath those trunks, "Steve, it's - it's no big deal. You started this. Let me⌠let's finish, yeah?" You eye him teasingly, eyebrows raised, "Something tells me you want to."
"You're a menace, you know that right? Always have been."
"Yeah, but you're into it, apparently." you stand on your tippy toes to whisper in his ear.
"Fuck. Fuck. Yeah." He gets out as you lick the water droplets up "Seeing you here every year. Highlight of my trip. Swear to God."
And as his soaked trunks hit the floor, the pair of you are both fully exposed standing under the running water together. Running your hand along his chest, playing with the tufts of hair there, you hook your finger though the thin chain hanging from his neck and pull him closer. "Steve." You whisper into his mouth.
"Yeah, whaddya need, honey?"
"You. God just, please fuck me. Okay?"
Clutching you close by the waist, he hikes your leg up and around his hip, reaching down along your ass to rub at your pussy from behind, working you up again. Almost teasing. The rock hard length of him is pressed up between your two tummies, begging to be paid attention to, so you break your bodies apart for just a second to angle him down, slipping if wetly between your lower lips - a mix of water and your hot dripping slick letting him slip through your folds.
A whimper slips out of your lips as his head catches your clit and he takes the opportunity to press into you, sounds something like a growl falling from his own lips at the feeling. Your mind is going blank, but the one thing you're sure of is that Steve Harrington's dick is huge. "Ohmigod, you're, bi- oh" you moan as he adds another few inches, moving slowly for you. "Fuck, you're huge. Jesus, Steve."
"Yeah? Biggest you ever had? God, tell me it's the biggest you've ever took."
"Shit" you hiss, as he bottoms out inside you, yelping out as you both finally meet at the base. "Yeah, shit. No one's ever been that fuckin deep, Steve. Holy shit."
"Fuck, yeah. I'm gonna move now, okay? You're good, right?" And you nod, enthusiastically. Almost too enthusiastically.
You've known Steve almost your whole life. You've played on playground swing sets growing up, rolled your eyes at his antics at your friends' parties in high school, cheered him on at basketball games and worked alongside him as lifeguards at the country club pool. You give him shit, he gives it back to you. You share comfortable silences and close friends. He's had your back in the face of monsters and raging fires⌠But right now, all that's on your mind is how he's pounding into your pussy in this shower and why this has never ever happened before in all these years. Because Jesus Christ, it's feeling euphoric.
The slapping of skin echoes loudly in the wooden and metal enclosure of the shower, bodies slick with water , hands gliding along your back and along your ass, keeping that knee hiked high for him, yours clutching the front of his shoulders and digging crescent moons into his skin. He's making noises, has he thrusts up into you at a bruising pace, hitting your cervix and making you cry outâŚbut he's holding back all the same and all you want is him to let go a little more.
"Fuck, wait. Holy shit. Lemme just⌠" you drop your leg down and hear his small whine as he slips out of you, but you're quick to flip your body around, leaning forward and bracing yourself on the beams of the wooden door frame, shaking your ass at him in an invitation to get close to you again. "Wait. Wait⌠" you gasp out as you feel his tip nudge against your entrance from behind.
"What's wrong? Are you .. are you okay? I can stop." He gets out through heaving breaths.
"No. I'm good⌠but if you wanna finish me off, you gotta do one thing for me." Looking over your shoulder, giving him a playful but serious look.
"What'dya need. Honey. Anything. What do you want?" He holds his cock, pulsing and screaming to be let back inside your warm and velvety walls, dots of precome rinsed off by the droplets of water as fast as they emerge.
"Don't hold back. Just⌠.let me hear you. I wanna hear you. Talk to me. Don't shut up. And fuck - fuck me harder" you hiccup out.
"Yeah, yeah okay. I'll ⌠I'll - fuck" he pushes in fully in one slide, no resistance from you in the least. "You wanna hear how good you make me feel huh? Always so cocky. Jesus."
His fingers are pressing into the tops of your thighs, purple mottled marks already blooming there under his fingertips as he pulls you backwards, spearing you on his cock, meeting him thrust for thrust. His other hand is wrapped around your waist, reaching for the soft of your belly, snaking up your chest until he finds your tits, nipples peaked with the chill of the air now that you're not directly under the stream of water. He runs his thumb along your nipples, giving them a playful flick back and forth before massaging them and pulling you up to meet him, back to chest.
In this position, you can drop yourself down as you meet his upward thrusts, bouncing on his cock and you feel his tip nudging a particular spot inside you that makes your walls constrict. "Oh honey, yeah? That's it. That's the spot isn't it?" And you can tell that has Steve's mind going off the deep end, making good on his promises to let you hear him, he's babbling, water splashing and raining down on you both, his grunts getting louder, and your name slipping off his lips in a whisper, like it belongs there.
Reaching back and around his neck, you turn so that you can see him and tilt his down to meet your gaze. Mouths both open, panting into one another, lips touching but never connecting because you can't quite sync up with the way you're both grinding on each other. "Jesus Christ, hnng fuck, I'm gonna⌠honey. Where do you want me? C'mon. Tell me."
You hear his sharp intake of a breath and feel his lips latch on to your throat, leaving sloppy kisses and sucking a bruise into it that you know you'll have to explain to your friends later. "Nnn-no. No. Not yet. I told you, lemme hear you. You're holding back I can tell."
"Oh-okay yeah. Gimme a sec. " He breathes through his nose taking in the scent of whatever vanilla soap you were using before he barreled in, maybe a little coconut still left over from your sunscreen, too. He exhales as his hand drifts down your front, settling over your mound and expertly finding your clit once again. He's rubbing figure eights, before sliding it between his two fingers, giving it pressure and pull from the sides as he continues to thrust into you from behind, bouncing you with very little effort because of how wet and slick you are from the shower.
"You're a fuckin' piece of work, you know that. Shit - taking me like this⌠fuck. " He growls out as he bends you forward fully now, holding you up by your chest as he rams into you. Leaning over just enough to get close to your ear he whispers in "Ya gonna let me come now? Fuck - ya gonna let me put it on your back? Huh? Your tits? Where do you wanna have it, honey?" He hisses as you grind your hips backwards and clench down hard on his shaft, squeezing on him and making his thrusts slow down, become more meticulous, more purposeful.
You're gasping in air and squeaking out noises of all kinds in time with his thrusts, telling him just how good he's making you feel between breaths. Just how deep he is hitting you. Just how much you wanna hear him when he comes. He's huffing out breaths and promising you things like next time as he's incoherently babbling praises at you as you ride back on his dick.
"You like when I talk about coming for you? You wanna have it, yeah?"
"Y-yeah I wanna. Inside. Do it inside, fuck!" You shout out, water from the showerhead beating on your back as his thrusts are jolting you forward where you're braced against the door. The janky little rusted metal latch holding on for dear life as he continues his pace, chasing his high and praying to God you let go with him.
He's feeling bold now that his brain is only chasing your orgasms. He groans the loudest moan you've heard from him this whole time as you feel him tense behind you, keeping up his movements but, just barely. His hips are stuttering and his hand falls down on your ass in a loud smack. "Ohhh shit. Honey. Yeah. That's what I'm talking about."
Your walls give him one last squeeze and you grip him tight, legs shaking under you as your orgasms rushes over your whole body. He has to hold you up as it rolls through your body, flashes going off behind your eyes as you cry out with pleasure. The pain from the smack to your ass being washed away with the cool of the water trickling over you.
It takes him only three firm thrusts more to fill you up, stuttering sounds falling from his lips. Incoherent blabbers and praises and gasps of your name spurting out along with his come.
You're both absolutely breathless, heaving chests and deep sighs filling the air while still connected to one another. Steve pulls you up slowly as he slips out of you, and spins you around. Still cradling your body and wrapping you into him, he pulls you both under the water to rinse off and come back down from wherever you both are floating off to right now. As you stand there swaying under the cascade, he brings his lips to your temple with a kiss as he mutters "I did mean it. I love seeing you here every year."
You hum along with him, because you do love seeing him too. You just never thought about it like this before. And now that you have, you're pretty sure it's the only way you can from here on out.
"We should probably get back down to the beach. I'm sure at least one of those nosey dipshits have noticed were both missing by now." Steve says against your skin.
"Yeah, yeah, you're right. But you are the one explaining these marks you left on me. I'm not saying a peep."
"Aw, c'mon sweetheart. You had a lot to say when I was in-"
"Stop that right now. If you wanna even think about doing this again, you're gonna stop right now." You roll your eyes at him while wrapping yourself with a towel and unlatching the door. As you back out and start up towards the house to grab a new swimsuit, he sees the grin on your face.
"Yeah, okay honey. Shutting my mouth now...so I'll definitely see ya later, then." He says with a wink, just as the door shuts and your left naked, wrapped up in Steve Harrington's towel with all your friends gathered round the grill out back making lunch watching you as you make your way around the path.
Eddie snarls a wide grin at you as he brings both thumbs up, his wife slapping his chest when she notices. "Hey Nance!" He yells out. "I think Harrington's got himself a new roommate for next trip!"
#joe keery#steve harrington#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington smut#steve harrington imagine#Spotify
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currently thinking about how lando would comfort the reader after he finds her crying on her birthday (totally not self indulgent or bc ive been crying about my birthday and how my mom called me to get upset at me and not to tell me happy birthday or anything)
:( iâm so sorry anon, i hope your day got better! also, happy birthday!! my dms are always open if you need anything!! i hope you enjoy this! â¤ď¸â¤ď¸
cleaning out my inbox
you sat on the back deck of the house party, wiping away the tears with the back of your hand. you tried to forget what had happened, tried to not let it ruin your special day, but it was all you could think about. a sentence burned into your brain that just so happened to ruin your whole entire mood.
lando had gone around the party asking all your mutual friends where you had slipped off to. he was normally good at keeping an eye on you when you werenât attached to the hip, but one conversation with alex and george and you had magically disappeared.
âthink sheâs outside, mate,â ethan said, âsaid something about getting a call from her mum earlier. havenât seen her since, so good chance sheâs still out there.â
lando sucked in a breath before smiling softly to his friend, âcheers, mate.â
he made his way through the sea of bodies that had somehow managed to pack themselves into maxâs home. he reached the back door, heart resuming its normal rhythm as he saw you sitting on the steps. you spun to look at who was behind the door opening, letting out a sigh of relief at the sight of your curly haired boyfriend.
âbaby, you okay?â
you shook your head as he joined you on the step, digging the heels of your palms into your eye sockets to keep yourself from crying even harder. he felt his heart drop, sinking to the lower step to be face to face with you.
âhey, hey, hey,â he said, pulling your hands from your face, âwhatâs wrong baby? what happened?â
you shook your head, âshe didnât even tell me happy birthday,â you let out a soft sob, âshe just yelled, about anything she could think of.â
he frowned, reaching up and wiping the tears from your face, âiâm sorry, love.â
you were used to it by now, and lando knew how things were with your family. a rocky relationship was an understatement.
"hey," he said softly, "how about we ditch this place and go get some food?"
your eyebrows raised in question, "you mean, like... leave the party?"
he placed his cup down, smiling as he offered you his hands, "only if you want to, we don't have to."
you twisted your lips in thought, knowing that if you went back inside you'd just be putting on a fake smile to all your friends, "can we go to that place with the fancy candles?"
"we can go wherever you want, baby. it's your birthday."
and that was that, you were placing your hands in his. he helped you up from off the step and led you through the backyard, slipping out through the gate and away from the booming music in the house.
#lando norris#lando norris x reader#fluff#ln4 x reader#ln4#ln4 imagine#mail time#lando norris imagine#lando norris x you#lando norris fanfic#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x reader fluff#lando norris fluff#fluff imagine#lando norris fluff imagine#ln4 fic#ln4 fluff#mclaren f1#mclaren#formula 1#formula one
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