#this is rambly and not in order but i'll fix it later lol

[ell-vellan]

(art by @thegoblinwitchqueen !!)

Lathlen Ghilassan Mahariel

An overview of my Mahariel and his "elfy" worldstate.

Born with a chip on his shoulder, prickly, quietly cunning, and snarky but with carefully-chosen timing, Lathlen is fiercely loyal to elves with a healthy distrust (bordering on pure, vengeful hatred) of humans.

He was named Lathlen ("child of love") in honor of his parents' memory. He chooses Andruil's vallaslin and dedicates himself to the Vir Tanadhal, espousing their ideals as his main worldview. Even still, he has few friends in the clan and has a difficult time forming bonds, instead spending most of his time alone in the woods perfecting his skill with a bow until he can take incredibly difficult shots with confidence. For this skill, he earns the second name Ghilassan, "guiding arrow." He answers to both, likes neither, and prefers going by Mahariel.

Mahariel gives people one chance to prove themselves, and one chance only. He accepts leaving the clan to live among humans as something he must do, and considers it an acceptable sacrifice to prevent more of his people falling to the Blight. If anyone had to leave, it might as well be him -- orphaned as he was, and with Tamlen dead or gone, it was best for everyone that it be him, than someone with a family.

When Tamlen was infected by the Blight, he and Lathlen were in the earliest stages of a relationship. They would flirt and tease when out alone on hunting trips, and had snuck a few clandestine kisses when the timing felt right, but neither had so much as acknowledged what was growing between them. It wasn't serious yet, as Mahariel likes to take his time, and doesn't jump into anything with both feet. He regrets not telling Tamlen how much he cares for him while he still had the chance.

Once he leaves with Duncan for Ostagar, his motto becomes "what choice is most advantageous for me, personally, that won't also bring the wrath of humans down on me or my people in retaliation?" His goal becomes "stay alive, and whenever possible, twist the situation to my advantage." He lets people think he is stoic and quiet, but he's always scheming and probably muttering something biting and sarcastic under his breath.

He initially views the humans in his party with a resigned opinion of "whoever I can use to help me stay alive", carefully cultivating allies by saying the right things and not pissing people off -- but if push came to shove, he would not hesitate to leave them in the dirt should they stop furthering his goals.

He privately thinks Morrigan is funny, if too arrogant for a human in matters of magic, in which he feels the Dalish are superior. He eventually comes to view Alistair as something of a brother, and though he frequently eyerolls the man's attempt at humor in the beginning, he eventually does realize it's his way of coping with Ostagar. Once he realizes the man is a bastard prince, he pities him; though they both never had parents, at least Mahariel was raised with love.

He becomes determined to convince Alistair to accept his role as king, as he would rather someone he knows become the leader of the humans of Ferelden. He thinks perhaps his camaraderie with Mahariel will make him sympathetic to elves - or at least, make him hesitate before purging alienages. Expecting, as always, that humans will always be humans, and even the most trusted among them can one day turn on you.

Betrayed (unsurprisingly) by humans at Ostagar, and with a bounty on his head, he sees it as only practical that the first and last person he can trust immediately afterward is Alistair, who is too ridiculous a man to plot to betray him and the only one with inborn ideals that would engender loyalty to a Dalish elf. Like it or not, they're part of a brotherhood of Wardens now. And seeing as they share common enemies, it only makes sense to stay at Alistair's side.

He initially plans to use the people around him to ultimately gain status and then revenge (you don't get to wrong him and get away with it) but comes to like a few of his party against his will. Leliana he thinks is ridiculous and a bit nutty, but as a fellow archer he has to respect her skill at killing and tricking people. Wynn he only brings along to keep him alive, but gains a slight amount of respect (or perhaps curiosity) for her when she reveals she's an abomination. He doesn't understand Sten at all, nor does he try; but the man knows how to kill and Mahariel appreciates his dry humor. They part ways on good terms after the battle for Denerim, and rarely but regularly keep in contact even when Sten becomes the Arishok.

Shale is similar: an indestructible golem who is unintentionally hilarious? Worth getting on its good side, certainly. Oghren he quietly detests, but figures another body between him and darkspawn won't hurt.

Zevran, he's immediately attracted to. He didn't see Zevran's attempt to kill him as serious -- he had an inkling that Zevran was much more skilled than he let on, and too easily surrendered. He's intrigued and curious by this, and welcomes the company of another elf - especially one so good at killing.

A beautiful and dangerous elf who's witty and charming? Mahariel is pretty certain he's won the assassin's interest but like with most things, he angles and analyzes and takes things slow. He joins Zevran in a threesome with Isabela, but mostly because Zevran likes her, Isabela is funny, and he's game to try anything once.

He kills Loghain without mercy; the man betrayed him, and traitors deserve death. He unites the Dalish and the werewolves, stops the purge of the Circle because mostly because he hates templars, and used the ashes to heal Eamon's son -- again, all choices made more with cold calculations of recruiting as many against the darkspawn as possible and winning people to his side. He knows he will be viewed as a monolith of the Dalish and so restrains his more vengeful instincts among the humans, trying to gain allies and esteem amongst the nobility to spare his people retaliation for his actions.

The dwarven king he may as well have blindly thrown a dart to choose the successor - he cares little, and writes them off as unimportant in larger the scheme of things. As soon as they leave the Deep Roads, Mahariel immediately forgets the king's name.

He hardens Alistair and convinced him to take the throne alone by leaning on their bond they have built as brothers, the only Wardens in Ferelden who knows the truth - "You're the only human I trust on that throne" - and so Alistair does it reluctantly. Mahariel knows he doesn't want to, and won't enjoy the crown; but he also doesn't really care. He could think of many worse fates than being rich and powerful.

He takes Morrigan up on her offer because no way is he dying for these people, not when his plans are finally coming together and he sees his exit plan with Zevran - sleeping with a woman is a small sacrifice to make, and he wishes her well with her very interesting plan, whatever it may be, as long as it doesn't come back to bit him in the ass.

He lives out his days with Zevran, following him to Antiva and helping take down the Crows from the inside. Lathlen introduces him to some of the northern clans of Dalish, helping him reclaim a little of his lost heritage. He eventually eschews his duty to the Wardens entirely -- he's given enough to them. He saved the world once; it can fend for itself now, for all he cares.

[eurydicees]

Also, I just saw you’re 23, I am too! It’s rough out here. Another idea: any characters, what’s it like being 23? Where are they at this point? I feel like hq shows that as being sooo grown up but like I’m just a big teenager right?? Idk just rambling

being 23 is so rough sometimes lmfao. i've got friends from high school getting married and friends from college having early life crises. i'm working full time and living alone but tbh mostly feel like i'm playing at house rn more than i am living on my own. whatever. it's fine. early 20s is just a silly time of life. anyways i don't have a fic for u but i Do have a headcanon list.

in no particular order, haikyuu characters as stupid things i've done in my early twenties:

atsumu: having a brother who is a chef does not prevent him from forgetting to take the cheese packet out of the mac and cheese box and dumping that into boiling water with the pasta.

udai: does not remember the last time he ate a vegetable.

oikawa: friends all went to a party without him and his coping method was getting so so so wasted on white rum and falling asleep on the living room carpet immediately after giving another friend a tarot card reading saying their breakup is imminent (to be fair, it was. but it was still kinda rude).

iwaizumi: after class, was led to a private stairwell by a friend, jokes "haha are you taking me to a hidden location to kill me." and then received a love confession. proceeded to say "uh. i'll think about it." then did finger guns. and said "im just gonna. go" and then fucking. ran. like not exaggerating, ran.

kageyama: went on a date. did Not At All Know it was a date, despite the very very obvious flirting. yes this was the same person as in the previous bullet point. don't look at me like that.

akaashi: took a 100 level class senior year and did not pay attention to a single lecture. instead wrote thousands of words of fanfiction in the classroom every day.

atsumu (again): another cooking one. i just think he'd be a terrible cook. sorry. anyways. "it's been 20 min, why isn't this scallion pancake im pan frying cooking yet?" (<- did not turn on the stove burner.)

yachi: hm the light in this room doesn't work. guess i'll just learn to see in the dark instead of inconveniencing anyone by asking to fix it.

akaashi (again): completely fell in love at first sight, but fast forward five months and it actually somehow worked out? however the five months were filled with the most insufferable pining possible, which could have been resolved so so so easily. also started talking about marriage, like, six months in.

bokuto: got sad. went out into a raging snowstorm in socks and no jacket. laid down in the snow for a long time. somehow, miraculously, didn't get a cold afterwards?

akaashi and/or yachi: changed majors and career paths because a pretty upperclassman asked them to. (i am very happy in my chosen path but jesus christ THAT was why i did it?)

hinata: flew from coast to coast of the country, then drove halfway back to the midwest in the span of three days. started a new job on the fourth day. didn't sign a lease on an apartment until the fifth day.

semi: skipped a day of work to drive four hours there and four hours back for a fall out boy concert. totally worth it but driving at 4am after a concert wasn’t the smartest thing ever to be done.

kuroo: started reading homestuck in the year of our lord 2024. this is an attempt to remain in contact with long distance friendships (by doing a bookclub) but jesus fucking christ dude.

ok this is getting too long and i needed to be ready for work, like 15 min ago lol. maybe i'll write more of these later, but i hope you enjoy these and my silly disasters are a little comforting :)

[marzipanilla]

Re: your tags; I know very little about the Invincible comics and I'm curious about the differences between them and the show, and how you think they're handled?

(p.s. I'm the one who commented on your time loop Debbie fic recently and I just wanted to say once again how much I like it :D)

Hey there ! Thought I recognized your name. Thanks. : D

Sure. I can ramble insanely about this lol I'll stick with just comic stuff that has been covered by the show so far, with a few mentions to things that seem to currently be absent since the comics had already mentioned them by now, so they could show up, could not- might be mild spoilers.

If you're curious about other stuff check out this tag (which I'll also add to this post) where Stove and I just theory craft and world build and ramble about the show in general.

Rest under the cut bc I can talk a lot lol

In general if you're also just looking for broader stuff about the themes and ideas that really could be present in Invincible but aren't- if you aren't familiar, Overly Sarcastic Productions is a YouTube channel that does video essays and they have a great one about the Superman trope, and they also cover Homelander and Omni-Man in it- and what they talk about in there about the politics and symbol of what a 'Superman' character really represents is just great and definitely something I think the writers could have integrated more. Again, this is a 20 year old piece of media that has one of its original creators attached to it- and he has flat out said he hoped to fix/tweak some things in it! Where I think Invincible is really beginning to fall flat is trying to adhere too much to its source material rather than being willing to use it as a basis for telling a better story, which seemed like something they were willing to do initially but has since tapered off.

I read from someone else that 'Invincible' is called that bc it's about Mark's indomitable spirit and nothing to do with his sort of invulnerability, and while I agree with that sentiment I think the comic and the show sort of lose sight of that. Like, stumbling blocks learning curves yes, but it IS very funny to go from S2 ending 'I need to learn to control myself' Mark to S3 'lose my shit and blender everything that stresses me out/threatens me' right up top.

But to try and go more in order...

S1 is the largest deviation from comic canon in that it added a lot. Darkblood being relevant, Cecil (who isn't introduced until after Nolan reveals himself in the comic), the entire investigation into who killed the Guardians, Amber being a fleshed out character. Debbie is much more of an accessory than a character in the comics (none of her talks w Mark about being a hero exist, none of her talks w Nolan about teaching him about Earth are in it) so pretty much anything that happens with her in that season is brand new. As is the support group and her near suicide in S2. I fell in love with Debbie in S1, and like you, her dynamic w Nolan is pretty much my one major investment in the narrative. And then after I watched S1 I read the comics, and uh.. yeah. Was not particularly pleased with what I read.

In the show Nolan is clearly shown struggling with what he is doing and is also very much an alien who had to learn through his relationship with Debbie about Earth, intimacy, and empathy. Nolan in the comics is more or less the perfect image of a family man (who seems to have figured everything out about Earth on his own) who raised his son and brings home the bacon (Debbie is a housewife in the comics, getting into real estate only after Nolan leaves). He also doesn't have the 'save planets vs save people' mentality that he does in the show. Comic!Nolan genuinely helps everybody all the time, no complaints, and definitely was never shown dropping a guy to scare information out of him.

The reveal happens later in the narrative and is much more sudden and jarring. Nobody suspects him (he wasn't injured, he just kills them all in one page of the comic and then goes about his day) yet he is arguably MUCH more callous in the comic once the truth comes out. Though he doesn't put Mark's head through a train. I think the hesitancy and the difficulty and the very ridiculous attempt to try and keep Debbie with him in the show is better for the over all narrative, though on a micro level I don't really have a preference for one over the other- Nolan is just arguably a different guy in the comic (I would say Mark and Debbie are as well).

His time on Thraxa is where a pretty massive change between the two is present. In the comic, Nolan has ~two weeks to hold his breath in space before he'll suffocate (just the amount of time we're given adult viltrumites can hold their breath for) and there is no suicide attempt- he just lands on Thraxa bc he stumbled across it and they put him in charge bc he's old. He also planned to take over and give the planet to the Viltrumite Empire as a mea culpa for fucking up on Earth! He eventually elects not to do this and sends for Mark to help him with his brother et al.

I do prefer the change the show gave us, suicidally depressed guy falls into being a hero and maybe starts to get his shit together. It gives a much better weight to the fact Earth did affect him and he is still carrying it around. Mark also breaks down into tears and begs his father to come home so they can all be a family again, which thank god they changed that. Mark doesn't express much in the comic aside from one snarky comment about his dad moving on real quick (which Nolan tells him to shut down because 'I'm still your father' and Mark shuts up). When asked about Debbie, in the comic Nolan just says 'I don't want to talk about your mother' and Mark drops it, not even defending her like he does in the show. (Debbie just becomes a passed out on the floor alcoholic in the comic until Mark yells at her one day and then that makes her get her shit together, which like, very glad they changed that, though I could have stood to see her drinking getting a little closer to what happens in the comic just bc I'm a sucker for characters I like suffering)

The show also did everything in it's power to make Andressa a person with feelings, and honestly I applaud the attempt but unless literally anyone bothers to mention her again why. She is such a plot device. In the comic she says 'it's an honor to be mated to him' re: Nolan and definitely doesn't have any long speeches about falling in love so hard she was apparently willing to overlook the guy having beat his last kid near to death and demeaned and abandoned his last spouse- and look, I will always be on the fence about how much Andressa actually knew about what happened and how it was presented to her bc what the fuck. Whatever was going on in Nolan's head when he decided to get remarried and have another kid is something that is genuinely never addressed in the comic and the show currently has a chance to rectify this, but who knows if they will.

I do all I can to warn people that I am definitely not unbiased and Oliver bugs the fuck out of me. There is a 'common' most hated character in the series, and I am ambivalent about them, but I fucking hate Oliver.

So far, his integration into Debbie's life on Earth is the one thing that was handled with a lot better grace, while I still find his entire story line very obnoxious. In the comic, Mark drops Oliver off at her house so he can go talk to Amber and when he comes back Debbie is just like 'I'm adopting him bc clearly as a mother I cannot resist taking care of a baby!'. The show let's her have feelings about it at least, but I still am mad that it didn't just have Mark single-father his brother. Just. Just fucking do it. The comics practically never showed Debbie actually raising/interacting with Oliver anyway. I am pretty sure the GDA tutor and Oliver have more back and forth dialogue with each other... like.. they literally just dumped this kid off on Debbie then never showed her actually raising him. The show is having her be more active with him, but it is in such an coddling mentality that I'm still not sure how I feel about it.

I AM baffled by her very mild response to him killing the Maulers, and it makes me nervous about what they plan to do with her. Debbie basically doesn't have any storylines going farther into the comic (her getting a job is really the one thing she ever does that's about her) so unless they start making shit up like in S1 she is going to becoming very extraneous, very quickly. Which is very saddening to me because I loved her so much in S1. Her revealing Mark and Oliver's identities to Paul in the comic is much more of a screaming match between her and Mark so I am very glad of the show's change there. My biggest gripes about her relationship w Paul in the comics has yet to come, so, we'll see if the show fixes anything there or not. Mostly though I do wish they were willing to completely rewrite that and just let her be single and have friends for a bit.

I think the show is just drawing out some things with Oliver, as he was more upfront at this point in the comics about being alien on an alien world he had no stake in, but at the same time the comics only ever seemed to use it as a shallow excuse rather than deep dive into what that could mean for the character.

Like, are you telling that 1) - he is just genetically predisposed to being a killer, which- WILD ass take to have in a narrative that so heavily features Nolan, a guy whose ENTIRE arc is about getting away from the edicts he was raised in and being able to change (not to mention the utter lack of this type of behavior in any Thraxan) or

2) he just picked that mind set up somewhere. To which the question begs, where? Supposedly he was raised by the (at the time) most emotionally available and non-homicidal version of Nolan there was, and Andressa, who very much was not presented with such a mindset. Mark and Debbie clearly didn't impart this to him! And the show fumbled here! Because they could have focused on the Levy attack. (Debbie does not get into a brawl w him in the comics, he just breaks her arm) They could have had him talk about that and how it shaped how he views 'bad guys' and what they're capable of! (in the comics Oliver remembers everything from when he was a baby) but no.

He's just special so he should get to kill people??

He could have been a fascinating way for Mark and him to explore what being children of an invader left on worlds that were invaded and given the legacy of the people who were conquered/near conquered from their mothers while struggling with being viewed as the invader their father was by everyone. but no. He's just an obnoxious child.

The show thus far has not brought up/has potentially written out the 'viltrumites are predisposed towards RAGE' thing that the comic had already brought up a few times by now. Which, they could be holding on to as a ~reveal for Oliver and Mark's smashy smash behavior, but dear god, we don't need biological determinism in a story about people changing. And they are aggressively screaming about reform and redemption these three episodes, so again, I would be very disappointed if the show did decide to include this.

While the reforms in the episode were weirdly presented as quasi-brainwashing, there were several times in the comic in which things like prison reform and changing how prisoners were handled were actually discussed in an interesting way so I'm hoping the show actually manages to keep that. Though at the end of the day, I never found Invincible's attempts at presenting multiple sides to a moral argument all that well done. But this IS a kick-punch universe and pretty much all problems are solved by kick-punching, and there is a point where I am just like 'yup. this is that kind of media and finding the line of where they could improve why they're kick-punching vs why are you kick punching this problem to begin with' can be wobbly.

Cecil's backstory wasn't altered in any way, and I get why a character like him is the way he is- but yeah, overall, there are basically not a lot of times where any other stances on hero'ing are really discussed. The narrative does ride real close to protagonist centered morality at times. Which is frustrating, because, no Mark, you just have no experience with this situation and no counter argument to what people are telling you!

When Eve quits heroing in the comics she goes to Africa, because this was the early 2000s and 'help people in Africa' was just what people said when they were going to do humanitarian work. What was she doing in Africa? Who knows. She was there. Very glad the show changed this. She also never went to college, so it'll be interesting to see where that story goes. Her entire kerfuffle in Chicago with the sink hole was also totally new to the show.

Of course, unless you were Mark, Allen, or Nolan, there was very little for you to do in the comics- so again, they're going to have to start adding stuff or things are going to get boring for a LOT of side characters fast.

God okay this got very long, if there was anything you were curious about that I missed let me know xD

[starlightbelle]

8, 17, & 30 for the fic writer ask!!

8. if you had to write a sequel to a fic, you'd write one for...

Of the ones I've shared, probably Here's to Not Being in Love. Zoro/Nami's dynamic is so fun to write; I left it open-ended for a reason, because I imagine I'll probably write more for them at some point. I don't have a sequel in the works yet, but if a compelling enough plot bunny should surface in my brain, I'm sure it'll insist upon being written. 😆

Ahhh I nearly forgot!! I intend to write a continuation of A Crisis of Confidence! Isuka doesn't get much appreciation among One Piece fans but I like her and I want to explore her relationships with other members of the Revolutionary Army. I've already penned her interacting with Dragon, so I think next on the docket would be something opposite Sabo. Both pre- and post-Marineford. I expect the latter will be very angsty, and I can't wait to explore it.

17. talk about your writing and editing process

✨The stars align. An idea strikes, either seemingly out of the blue, while discussing characters with my friends, or after hearing a line in a movie/song that hits just right.

Generally I jot down as much as I possibly can (if I'm at work or something I'll loop the idea/scene/dialogue in my head until I have a free moment to type down as much as I remember), key points or words to jog my memory later. I do often have a line or two that I know exactly how I want written. There are no shortcuts or abbreviations of those, I have to write the line out entirely.

After that, once I have a block of time I can more fully devote to writing I fill in the blanks. Whatever flows, whatever works. I am kinda an edit-as-I-go type of writer, though normally at this stage just finding a synonym for a word that works better or fixing the phrasing of a sentence.

If a particular scene is giving me trouble, the draft will remain a cocktail of disconnected snippets (sometimes in the wrong order) until I have a breakthrough with the gaps.

Once the story is penned, I read through it. Usually this stems from a desire to have the manuscript look tidy and neat and complete in my notes app. Along the way I'll make little changes, fix any errors I find, rearrange paragraphs if needed, etc.

After that, I reread it an absurd amount of times. This is motivated by pure enjoyment. I am my target audience so I like reading what I write. 😊 It just so happens that that's how editing works, too. Win-win.

If I'm sending it to a friend, or preparing to share it, I'll give it another pass or two (or three). Normally I don't have much to correct at this point.

I also will reread it again after I've shared a piece to make sure the formatting works, everything flows, etc.

Yep. That about sums it up. 😅 It isn't really a conscious checklist I go thru, just kinda how it ends up working out.

30. share a fic you're especially proud of

I'm proud of all my works! 😁 But one I haven't seen get much love is my seventh Corazon Week piece. Although I believe one of those three kudos is yours already lol.

It doesn't have any relationship tags, which I suspect might be the reason it's not showing up on Cora fans' radar, because the pov character is left intentionally ambiguous. It was an artistic decision I knew might keep it out of search results, and I debated using multiple relationship tags instead to cover all bases but I worried that might come across as baiting so I left it without. I may change it though if I get feedback on that.

Thanks so much for asking! I know my answers tend to get a little rambly, so thanks for your interest! This one was a bit like a behind-the-scenes feature on a DVD! (Prompt list)

[moodymisty]

yoo I see requests are open 👀 Grievous is currently living in my head rent free so feel free to ignore the Star Wars if you're not feeling it or ya just don't write for him yes.

hhhh anywho goodness not sure what to ask. maybe some headcanons on what Grievous is like when he falls for someone. he strikes me as someone who would be majorly in denial for a long time lol. gentler (for him) actions and protectiveness not always matching harsh words. like a majorly burnt, kinda stale marshmallow, with a gooey, mostly edible center XD rambling aside or maybe some jealousy headcanons? those are always fun. whichever one might strike your fancy at all.

well I never know how to end these things lol hope you're doing well ✨

Who doesn't love the Angry Lung Cancer Robot? Not me for sure, I love that ugly thing since I first watched the prequels. I'll always be just a lil' spiteful that TCW turned him into a running gag. Sorry if these headcanons are a little less 'professional' than my usual, I couldn't form my thoughts in a way I liked so I figured you'd enjoy it more if I just vomited them out wholesale. And you've waited long enough :'3

---

He definitely strikes me as the 'affection is when I stand 3 centimeters closer' type of person. Like it's going to be just sort of an undertone throughout the ship of like 'yeah the General prefers them/asks for them to do things instead of anyone else, we don't talk about it'. It probably persists for months before anything comes of it.

If you somehow manage to notice it, it's probably a battle of deciding what in the galaxy to do about it if anything. (is getting the attention of a warmonger cyborg a good thing?) If anything you might not do anything about it just so you feel a little safer on the ship. It's not like Grievous has the lowest causality rate, though it's mostly droids.

I don't think he would have the emotional intelligence to really ever realize, someone would have to point it out to him. Perhaps like you said maybe months later he would, but that would be a pipe dream. He's not an easy guy, that's for sure.

Perhaps he'll realize, but he'll excuse it more so as he prefers you for your competency, rather than something a bit deeper. Droids get programmed to report nonemergency issues to you, because not only does he not get infuriated by them as much, he trusts your ability to solve issues just a modicum more than others aboard. A good thing? Maybe. You can deal the negotiations, he'll just stand behind you, menacingly. If things fall through, then he'll be there to make sure you don't get hurt. For strategical reasons, of course.

As for jealousy? Given the previous points I made and your own I think it would be pretty obvious that a jealous Grievous is a Grievous you want to be miles away from. He's more than likely the type that would use violence or threats of in order to keep people away.

He might also deliver things to your directly, or even make your office/barrack/personal quarters towards the bridge of the ship closer to his. It's a mix of both subtle, and horribly unsubtle things.

Anyways, Grevious is a mess. But we never said we could fix him, and that's the fun part. (give the killer cyborg a smooch and tell him he's the best general in the separatist army, he deserves it)

[psaiouma]

Cupid's Writing Diary - 2/4/25

Entry End of Day February 4th, 2025

As Kiwi inspired us and Bee has started posting these, I wanted to as well! Not that there's much to say, ahaha. [Note: he ended up finding a lot to say LOL]

If you don't want to see these, just block the tag 'Cupid's Writing Diary'. Oh, and they will not be put into the queue like everything else has been.

Wrote roughly 400 words today, which is awesome. I haven't been writing much lately despite how strong of a year I started with. I'm sure this is due to my current distractions but I already wasn't writing before Hello Kitty Island Adventure came out~

I've made the executive decision to stick with one project when it's done. A second project will be picked as a backup in case I need an ADHD switchover distraction, but, again, thanks to HKIA, I do not think that'll be necessary at this time.

I always feel weird saying my fics before they're posted, because I'm worried that'll make them boring when the time comes, but I think talking about the plot for this one won't spoil the fun and magic about it?

So, out of my 29 [yikes] options, I have ultimately decided the one want to work on is a fic I've so lovingly dubbed 'Snautism', a name which is slowly becoming the official title work.

This oneshot project started back in July 2024 when my snake hyperfixation took my life over by storm. And, as all things go since playing Danganronpa in 2020, I immediately had to Saiou it. I'm really excited for the plot of this fic and all of the fun snake facts [about one particular species] I can shove in it. At the end of the day, this one is for fun and just for gushing about my love of snakes/this species. There's also just a morph that I think fits very, VERY well. [Multiple, actually, but one more than the others.] Section 1 is completely done, yay! I'm the type to over-edit and despite editing it 5 times there's still things I'm not satisfied with, but that section is officially ready to go out for beta [not that I'd send it early, it'll all go at the end]. Section 2, however, has been driving me mad SINCE July, honestly. I just cannot make up my mind about the order of events or the feelings of scenes and it's driving me mad. Past me would just write it on passion alone and fix the inconsistencies later smh. Still, I just jumped ahead to a different part today and wrote a good chunk of the first big reveal!! Though I'm worried I'm drawing it out too long that it won't hit as good? Eh, I think I'll leave that one up to the beta as well.

I haven't actually got to talk about what snake it is in the fic, though, and I'm SO excited to do that, because these snakes do something so special that I'm just gidddyyy about how in character I think this is going to be. God I hope the humor in this scene lands ehehe. I've always lived by the rule of 'if it makes you laugh, it'll make others laugh' and thank goodness that hasn't failed me yet!

Well, this was honestly extremely therapeutic! And it made me write so that I had something to talk about lol. Who knows if I'll keep it up. Historically, no I won't. But I'd like to think that it's a good first step. And maybe more people than the same three people I tell everything to knowing might be good for me? Dunno. It's been a long and arduous process picking myself back up from the bootstraps of the hellyear that was 2022, but each lttle bit helps! I can tell I'm a LOT better than I was, and I might even get out more than two Saiou fics this year.

Oop, rambled again. I'm defs a typer/rambler. So thank you for reading if you did. Feel free to send me asks about this project or others! Love talking about writing and reading and Saiou!

[citrus-swirls]

I have a playlist for Something About Blood Feeding the Garden. I associate music with books/fics a lot of the time and would love to hear if anyone has any songs they associate with my fic, or what songs you associate with other fics (parx or not!).

The order to this playlist is not in order of how I see it in the fic, but rather how I like how it sounds lol. There is a lot of my thinking behind plot points and behind the scenes stuff below too if you are interested :) I never want my author's notes to be very long so hopefully someone out there is interested in these rambles.

Pesticides Remix - Moselle & Matt Hip. This is where the title comes from, and is the ethos of the fic. Even though it's from Geoff's POV, to me I feel like Awsten is still responsible for the inciting actions and this is Awsten's song. I was interested in writing about the grief process, and how that differs from person to person and how we handle how other people mourn. I heard this song for the first time when V and I were outlining the story, and this just felt like fate and really shaped the story I wanted to tell.

my tears ricochet - Taylor Swift. This is Geoff's grief song. I think he feels very stagnant, especially in part 2 and most of part 3. This song also was a good theme for when Awsten and Geoff weren't speaking to each other.

Are You Really Okay? - Sleep Token. This song comes mostly into play in parts 2 & 3 as well. "And I cannot fix your wounds this time / But I don't believe you when you tell me you are fine".

This Empty Northern Hemisphere - Gregory Alan Isakov. This song inspired the radio station, with the lines "While you were sleeping I was the turning the dials / And I walled up your kingdom with radio wires / And the bells of the choir came in low and rumbling ". Fun fact there was originally going to be a radio station at the Zoo; I had imagined Great Uncle Joseph as this very eccentric old man with a million hobbies, and I wanted Awsten to start running the station and Travis & Jawn hear them and try to find them. But I quickly ran into the issue of...how would Travis & Jawn know where to find a random radio station in backwoods Texas lol.

Something in the Orange - Zach Bryan. This song is for right after Otto and Geoff's kiss in part 1. "If you leave today, I'll just stare at the way / The orange touches all things around / The grass, trees and dew, how I just hate you / Please turn those headlights around"

The Prophecy - Taylor Swift. Ugh, what part of this song ISN'T perfect for this fic? This song is mostly for part 6, with Awsten desperate to change the tides.

Gilded Lily - Cults. This is Aria's theme song actually. I was hoping someone by now would comment on it but nobody has haha, Aria and Owen are meant to be a direct mirror of Awsten and Otto. Desperate, crazy, stupid, with ill conceived plans but enough love to make it worth it.

Dinner & Diatribes - Hozier. I'll be honest this one is mainly because it sounds good audibly with the rest of the playlist and it helps when I listen to music while writing. Take that as you will.

Mylo Xyloto and Hurts Like Heaven - both by Coldplay. This entire album (also called Mylo Xyloto) has influenced this fic so badly I had to include it. Mylo Xyloto is an intro song that flows into Hurts Like Heaven, and Hurts Like Heaven is the first song they hear in part one on the CB radio. I wanted them to have something joyous and magnificent and hopeful and loving. I love listening to this album full blast driving down the highway with the windows down.

Who'll Stop The Rain - Creedence Clearwater Revival. This song has been on every zombie apocalypse playlist I've ever made, and it's never named but it is the second song they hear in part one on the radio. This song is included mostly for vibes.

Button On Brown - Alan Gogoll. Another song for vibes/background for writing.

Soon You'll Get Better (feat. The Chicks) - Taylor Swift. This will come into play......later. :)

As the World Caves In - Matt Maltese. Another vibes song that works for apocalypse/dying romance setting.

Spiral - Flyte. This album (The Loved Ones) is one of my all time favorites. This is Geoff and Awsten in the sunflower hut in part 3, kissing for the first time.

Killing Me - Conan Gray. I feel this is part 3 when Geoff & Awsten aren't talking. Originally there was going to be a huge part where Geoff feels jealous how Awsten has been mourning Otto, and feels he can't compete for his love. And then I was like well that is stupid. But the song stays because it's great.

The Very First Night - Taylor Swift. This is like Geoff and Awsten's love for Otto basically. "I wish I could fly / I'd pick you up and we'd go back in time / I'd write this in the sky / I miss you like it was the very first night"

I Know The End - Phoebe Bridgers. Classic apocalypse playlist song, really.

Polarize - Twenty One Pilots. I'm not sure I realized how long this playlist is until right now. This song is very Geoff to me.

Swim - Maggie Miles. This song was at V's request for Otto. It's a banger. "Roamin' through a dream with an unfulfilling motive / Say you're better now but your mouth fills with poison"

Swimming In The Glow - Joywave. Another song at V's request for Otto. This kind of feeling of perpetual waiting.

Little Lion Man - Mumford & Sons. This song just sounds good with the rest. Filler. I suppose you could argue this is another Geoff song but that was not its purpose to me.

Vignette - Twenty One Pilots. THE Zombie Otto song. This song inspired Otto having an inner world, this and the movie I Saw The TV Glow which honestly is not a movie I enjoyed much but it did remind me of a fanfiction I read on Livejournal when I was maybe thirteen of a similar plotline, where someone was sick and had an elaborate ongoing fantasy to cope.

Pink Skies - Zach Bryan. This song comes into play in part 6. :)

You And Whose Army? - Radiohead. Vibes song.

Jesus From Texas - Semler. A friend recently recommended this to me and I sobbed thinking of Geoff in this au.

Fable - Gigi Perez. Another very recent add. It reminded me of Nick, strangely enough, which is a perfect segue into my OCs. I love these OCs I have created. I know OCs aren't everyone's cup of tea, and to be frank I normally despise OCs in fics and think they are annoying and filler, but I needed a better balance to make this world truly feel like an apocalypse. I needed a family we didn't know for the Zoo so Awsten & Geoff could mourn safely, I needed a compound of migrants who settled around a military base because that is something that would happen. I needed a matriarch, I needed children, I needed characters who are coping just fine and others who haven't coped at all. So I hope you love them, because I do. And if you don't, well. The fic is almost over haha.

I hope you enjoyed this! Would love to chat if you have any thoughts or suggested songs, or if you have your own fic playlists. Also sorry for the numbering issues, Tumblr made me break them up for character limit reasons.

[pyropsychiccollector]

Yuma Harem: Down Came the Rain 1/7

Time to begin the third series~... I wanted to make sure to do all of the poll winners first, so that's the initial reason for spreading the love between series. :3 And now it's Rain Code's turn~...

As always, this will be an AU. Rain Code killed off... a good half of this harem. And Guillaume might as well be dead for all that she drops off the map after Chapter 3... XD So Fubuki and Kurumi are the only canon survivors. And the game ends on a pretty somber note with Yuma just leaving after regaining his memories, moving onto the next adventure. Very typical in shounen series, honestly. It's not "bad", just...

I want to fix things. (人◕ω◕) Too much death. Too much hurting the Kokohead. The Kokomelon, as some fans might affectionately call him. (人◕ω◕) And moreover, the "Yuma" we come to know "dies" as he regains his memories. Sure, it's strongly hinted that his feelings and experiences are just integrated into his original self... But we don't know the former #1 of the WDO. We know "Yuma", the amnesiac. Maybe Yuma had principles before he gave up his memories, maybe he did have morals... But if Makoto showed us anything, he was frankly a ruthlessly cunning individual that crossed any line in order to reach the truth. You can see this in how he assigned a great many detectives to Kanai Ward, and most of them died.

... I know I'm rambling, but the point I wanted to make is that I'll be focusing on the Yuma that we know. Not that the former #1 isn't interesting to think about... But Yuma has heart, you know? I wish to reward that. Reward the nice guys. Reward the goobers. (人◕ω◕) It does mean Shinigami will be sticking around, and you could count her as an unofficial member of the harem (... I mean, c'mon. What? You want Shinigami to bonk her Master silly in the Mystery Labyrinth? Perverts. (人◕ω◕) Not that I'm much better.)... But as you'll see, I've tweaked the idea of Mystery Labyrinths. If Kodaka's going to have a game just short of Persona, I'm gonna go "all the way" with those ideas. Put my own spin on the concepts. (人◕ω◕) I regret nothing.

The Beginning

To absolutely no one's surprise... Kurumi won the poll. lol I don't mind, she's essentially "Detective Chiaki". Finally, a series where "Chiaki" lives... For those who played Danganronpa, they were just brutal with her, tearing out and stomping on our hearts. Again and again. XD As a consequence, though, Kodaka killed off just about everyone else. ... He just can't let us be happy, can he? (人◕ω◕)***

But this lets me get Kurumi-chan outta the way. Again, not that she's bad... She's honestly a really sweet girl, and I won't pretend otherwise. It's just that we know Kurumi's story, know her dynamic with Yuma. And I personally like saving my dessert - that is, the girls that I most strongly support with the protagonist - for last. ... Didn't completely work out for Fate, but aw well. (人◕ω◕)

... I'm rambling again. There's stuff I gotta elaborate on. The first thing to note in this AU is that through a miracle, the train gang - the detectives that Yuma first got to know before reaching Kanai Ward - are all spared, save for Zilch. What ended up happening is that Yuma passed out in front of the detectives, fell over and bumped his head. This allowed the detectives to figure out that he was drugged - likely by the coffee he drank - and the fake Zilch was left to improvise and have Swank and the Peacekeepers deal with the detectives after faking his death to pin on the detectives.

Yuma still goes to the Mystery Labyrinth and Shinigami executes fake Zilch at the end of it. Yakou still arrives to help get the Peacekeepers off Yuma and friends' backs, and they all successfully make it to the Nocturnal Detective Agency. I bring up this background information just so there's not any confusion about Pucci's survival, later on... And why I'll be bringing up the train detectives in subsequent Chapters. XD

Chapter 1 still goes the same way. So we'll skip right to the relevant bits: the Aetheria Academy arc. Chapter 2. (人◕ω◕)

Chapter 2 is... more changes. Due to a few more detectives moving around in Kanai Ward (Pucci, Aphex, Zange, Melami), the NDA is a little more known. Which is why one of the "Aetheria trio" (Yoshiko, Waruna, Kurane) approaches Yuma first, as opposed to Kurumi. Kurane-chan wanted to desperately explore one last non-violent option to expose Karen, and avoid blackening Waruna and Yoshiko's souls. (人◕ω◕)

... I won't go into full details just yet, save that for the appropriate posts. However, I will say that Kurane's actions do wind up saving herself, Waruna, and Yoshiko from becoming killers. It doesn't all go to plan, and they do throw Yuma under the bus when crap hits the fan... But they live, and are able to atone for screwing Yuma over. The Aetheria trio still has futures. (人◕ω◕)

With all this background explained... Let's talk about Kurumi~ Because Kurane was the first to approach Yuma, Kurumi is initially unaware of who "Yumi", one of the new girls at the academy, is. She doesn't know he's a detective looking into Aiko's death (Kurane is testing him, which is why she didn't give him all the details), just that "Yumi" cares enough to ask about Aiko and what happened to her. ... And "Yumi" is rather cute. Kurumi-chan totally fangirls over Yuma's female disguise that he got from Desuhiko. Fooled into thinking he is a girl, and just another student at the academy. (人◕ω◕)

Kurumi and Yuma hit it off pretty well. For the week or so leading up to the fateful rehearsal, Yuma pokes around, trying to pinpoint the truth behind Aiko's death, whether it was a suicide or if someone killed her. Initially, Kurumi tries putting the brakes on his investigation because Yuma's a "civilian", and she doesn't want him getting in trouble with the Peacekeepers... But after Yuma half-lies and says he has connections with the new detective agency in town, promising to get them involved if Kurumi lets him investigate... Kurumi allows it, and gives her all in supporting "Yumi".

... Then the rehearsal happens, and "Yumi" stands accused of Karen's murder. Kurumi is still kept out of the loop as Yuma, Desuhiko, and Melami give the Peacekeepers the runaround while investigating the new murder case. She does what she can for "Yumi" by asking the theater club members and comforting them, but unfortunately Kurumi's not able to do too much with all the Peacekeepers locking the theater hall down.

It's not until after everything blows over that Kurumi finds out the truth about "Yumi". ... I mean, she saw him exposed as a man when Martina cornered the detectives on stage, but she wouldn't get the full story until the case's bumpy resolution. Kurumi didn't take it very hard she was kept in the dark for so long; Yuma had his reasons, and while he couldn't keep a new murder from happening he did help expose the truth and bring closure to Aiko's death. And it was a relief that her doubts about Yoshiko, Waruna, and Kurane could be put to rest. All four of them were close friends of Aiko, and it hurt that Aiko is gone... But they're able to move forward now, even if the trio has regrets and feel they need to atone in their own ways.

Kurumi helps Yuma with his investigation into Kanai Ward, filling him in on the information her grandfather uncovered before he disappeared. That Amaterasu was dabbling in homunculus research. Kanai Ward is still a broken city in dire need of hope, but Kurumi feels more optimistic now that detectives have finally arrived. The perpetual rain feels a little less oppressing~

The Middle Act

Kurumi bonds with Yuma and the other detectives in the coming weeks. (人◕ω◕) Kurane does, too, clinging to Yuma pretty hard... And Waruna and Yoshiko come around at their own paces. The bottom line is, Yuma becomes a good friend to the Aetheria girls. (人◕ω◕) He can never replace Aiko... But he fills the role she left behind. Yuma's an earnest, kindhearted young man that won't stand for injustice. Yet he won't give into despair, won't stoop to murder or similar extreme methods. The ends don't justify the means. In his unwavering beliefs and how he slowly gains confidence the more time he spends in Kanai Ward, Yuma helps the Aetheria girls to remain grounded. He helps them to have hope once more. (人◕ω◕)

Of course Yuma's got a giant target painted on his back because of the Peacekeepers running everything, but Kurumi stands by Yuma. Not just because she's the city's only informant, but because Yuma is her friend. And he helped her connect with Yoshiko, Waruna, and Kurane.

... So when Yomi still nukes the sub, a couple of weeks after the Aetheria case... Kurumi is swept up into urgency by Kurane, who's the most worried about Yuma, especially after he gets spirited away by the Resistance... It's not like there's much they can do. Needless to say, Chapter 3 is pretty rough for the Aetheria girls. While Waruna and Yoshiko are still in the middle of reflecting and bonding with the detectives at their own respective paces, and while they have varying doubts about how much the detectives can really impact Kanai Ward's situation with Amaterasu... They still didn't wish harm on the detectives. Not after being given a new lease on life. Kurumi and Kurane are the closest with the detectives, and it hurts to see the sub blown up, to not know if the other detectives are alive... To know that someone kidnapped Yuma...

And later, events go further downhill. Yuma and the detectives get pinned as bombers, as terrorists... The Aetheria girls have to be careful with the Peacekeepers suffocating Kanai Ward more than usual in their hunt for the detectives, but they can't just stand by and not help Yuma find the truth behind the new case. Marunomon District doesn't get flooded this time around, but bombs going off and killing people is still... pretty bad... Kurumi does everything she can as an informant to glean as much evidence and testimony as possible. And Kurane looks to her, emulating Kurumi in her own way. Kurane's greatest strength is that people rarely notice her, even the bumbling Peacekeepers that are so dead-set on tracking down Yuma. It's an awesome investigative power, and Kurumi's grateful to have Kurane's help in gathering clues. Waruna and Yoshiko help in their own ways; Waruna's the fiery, overprotective girl, the "muscle"; and Yoshiko has... connections. Mostly schoolmates, but she's on good terms with people outside the academy, too.

Regardless of Kurumi and the Aetheria trio's help, Yuma, Aphex, and Fubuki still end up cornered. ... And then through some miracle, all the detectives come out of the woodwork, and they're saved and the Peacekeepers grudgingly stand down when Amaterasu's CEO shows up. Kurumi's not sure what to make of Makoto, he seems like a pretty laidback guy, but there are undertones of... something more, beneath the surface. He saved the detectives, saved Yuma, but Kurumi can't help wondering what Makoto's angle is. And she's even more baffled when the CEO gives the detectives their sub back, with everything inside pretty much the same as it was before it got destroyed.

About a month flies by before they all know it, after that debacle. The detectives are all reunited, Kurumi and the Aetheria trio can still hang around them, and even the Resistance leaders are coming around now... Kurumi was a bit intimidated by the Resistance before the detectives came to the city, only really having rumors to go off of. But really, the Resistance leaders are pretty goofy, even if they're capable in their own right. They're not as extreme as the rumors would have you believe.

With all of them coming together, it really feels like they can effect change in Kanai Ward. The Peacekeepers are still wary of the detectives, still want to arrest them... Or at least some of them do. Kurumi begins noticing that some Peacekeepers are, however grudgingly, allowing the detectives to look into cases. At least the small-time stuff. ... If Amaterasu is linked at all in incidents, they're still pretty defensive and ornery. But there's a lot of crime in Kanai Ward, and Amaterasu isn't tied in everything... Just the most serious stuff.

And with Vivia's latest intel, they've been trying to locate a secret lab where the homunculus research is being conducted. To no avail, but it's the best lead they have to go on. And so a month after that last debacle... Kurumi is anxious when the detectives go straight to Amaterasu and get wrapped up in another incident. She, her friends, and the Resistance can't do much but wait for the detectives to come back, and it's an agonizing wait...

Thankfully, the detectives do make it out of Amaterasu's HQ in one piece. And they bring good news: Yomi's been arrested, and it truly seems like Kanai Ward will change for the better after this. Kurumi's glad. The detectives still have their mission of discovering Kanai Ward's Ultimate Secret... But for the first time in years, Kanai Ward seems to have a bright future ahead of them.

... To Kurumi and everyone else's dismay, however, the tragedies aren't over yet. Apparently, after they see the news of the World Detective Organization getting bombed, everyone in the sub at the time is knocked out. And when they wake back up... Yuma is gone. Nothing else was taken, no threatening note was left behind... Yuma's just disappeared.

They all have a bad feeling about this. The detectives are determined to settle this themselves, to keep the "civilians" out of harm's way... But Kurumi, the Aetheria trio, and the Resistance absolutely refuse to sit this one out. While the detectives go straight to Amaterasu HQ to confront them about Yuma's abduction, the Aetheria girls and the Resistance scour Kanai Ward, just on the off chance that Yuma was taken by someone else...

To their great horror and discomfort, however... Yuma is nowhere to be found. They investigate hard over the next two days... The detectives return with their conclusion Yuma isn't in Amaterasu, they were even allowed free roam of the Amaterasu premises by Peacekeepers and researchers alike. And... he wasn't there. The Aetheria girls and the Resistance didn't have any luck, either - no one had seen or heard from Yuma. It's like he disappeared from the world completely...

And that's around the time that the detectives decided it was time to confront the one area they'd left untouched: The Restricted Area. If Yuma was nowhere in the Kanai Ward that they knew... Then he had to be there. Determined to save Yuma, everyone bands together to bust into the Restricted Area, rules and laws be damned. (人◕ω◕) They take one of the Resistance's vans and use it like a battering ram to plow through the electric fence around the perimeter of the Restricted Area. Then they take another van and drive on through the opening, not trusting at all what might be on the other side...

The Restricted Area is unlike anything they'd seen in Kanai Ward. It was rundown, and it seemed like an older area of the city, nowhere near as bright and illuminating as the rest of the city. It was like... darkness lurked in the Restricted Area. A deep darkness that made Kurumi feel anxious and worried, but they needed to take the plunge and find Yuma at all costs... He... He had to be there. There was nowhere left. No other possibilities. Kurumi and everyone else were unable to accept the possibility that it was too late to save Yuma... that he was already gone.

After finding that the Restricted Area was not an easy place to navigate by car, and that the people roaming about it seemed... strange somehow... the "Yuma Rescue Squad" got out to explore the area on foot. Servan and Aphex would stay with the van, driving around where they could and keeping an eye out. But the detectives, Kurumi, the Aetheria trio, and Shachi, and Iruka all split up to cover the most ground. They weren't dumb enough to search on their own, not in such unfamiliar territory; they formed pairs or groups. Kurumi stuck with her friends, and bravely forged on ahead.

... It was such a spooky, spine-tingling place. The locals were gruff and unresponsive to them, and not a single teenager was keen on approaching them more closely. They vaguely knew that this area was rumored to have had a gas leak in the nearby mines, and that Amaterasu labeled this town as uninhabitable... So maybe the locals were so strange because of that gas leak. Amaterasu might not have been able to do anything for the people here.

All Kurumi could do was keep searching for Yuma... He had to be okay. He had to be. Seeing this place so desolate and brought to utter ruination... A heavy weight was in Kurumi's chest and refused to go away. If Yuma was here, there was a good chance that he hadn't eaten or slept well... But they would save him. They wouldn't leave a single stone unturned.

To their immense relief, Kurane was able to find Yuma after what must have been an hour... He was holed up in a random house, after barricading the door and windows. Yuma... Yuma was bleeding. It looked like someone or something had tried gnawing his shoulder and neck, and his clothes were all roughed up. Kurumi and Yoshiko did what they could, scrounging around for any First Aid supplies in the home, bandaging Yuma up and sterilizing his wounds. He was horrified at seeing them in the abandoned village, fearfully asking if they'd encountered anyone... If everyone else had come here.

Yuma was not that relieved to hear that was the case. When asked what had happened to him, why he was holed up here, all Yuma could say was that the people in this village were wrong... They weren't normal. Weren't sane. He even went so far as to call them zombies... Yuma wasn't sure how or why he was brought here, but they needed to round up everyone and leave. He didn't want to endanger his friends...

He didn't feel that he was worth the effort to come here. Yuma had been prepared to just die trapped in this abandoned house. But now all he wants is to just get everyone safely out of the village... go back where they came. If they have to leave him behind, so be it.

Yoshiko and Waruna gave Yuma an earful about his self-sacrificial attitude, and Kurumi and Kurane just did their best to comfort him. They'd make it out... But Kurumi came to the realization that they should investigate this place. Yes, safety was paramount... But if they just left, Yuma could get dragged back here by whoever kidnapped him. Hell, the Peacekeepers might punish them for breaking in here, or they'd just seal off the Restricted Area again... This was a once-in-a-lifetime chance to find out what this place was, what happened here, and why Yuma was brought here.

... Kurane doesn't like the thought of lingering somewhere that almost got Yuma killed, but Waruna and Yoshiko uneasily agree that Kurumi's right. They can't just... leave without answers. They'll look around while searching for the Resistance and the detectives.

In subsequent events, they skirt around the locals that Yuma's deeply fearful of. They investigate an old post office, and find the order to evacuate amidst papers left behind. Soon enough familiar faces show up, and the girls have no choice but to believe the "zombie" story that Yuma fed them. There's no other explanation for seeing Karen and her father approaching them sluggishly, moaning and groaning incomprehensibly. They make a run for it, and somebody outside shoots an arrow attached with a note that explained a little bit about defective homunculi... They don't have the time to sit and reflect on it, so they keep moving, and eventually run into the Priest from the church, as well as that Worshipper. And before long, more and more familiar faces emerge from the woodwork, none of them can be reasoned with so Yuma and the girls keep running.

Gradually, they hook back up with the other Rescue Squad members, who are thankfully in one piece, if not spooked by the seemingly cannibalistic residents. They eventually reach the ominous factory, and uncover more information about homunculi and the true nature of Kanai Ward. Some Rescue Squad members are already in the factory and surrounding areas, poking around. They learn the uncomfortable truth that the meat buns of Kanai Ward are made from human corpses, and they just keep learning more and more...

The final "stop" on their tour is an old bathhouse up high. They all can see this is where the unending rain originates from, and when they turn off the equipment... everyone but the detectives pass out, and the residents of the abandon village go berserk. Makoto arrives to restore the rain, but only after Yuma "lends a hand". Right after the rain is back, Makoto and the detectives have a tense standoff, and Yuma has no choice but to access the Mystery Labyrinth one more time to resolve everything. Thankfully, however, he's not alone as all the Nocturnal Detective Agency personnel join Yuma on this last eye-opening adventure. (人◕ω◕)

The Future

Players should probably know by now how the final adventure goes. (人◕ω◕) Yuma uncovers everything, and this time he's got his NDA friends supporting him, not just Shinigami. It's an emotional rollercoaster for all of them... But they get Makoto to change his ways, to leave the labyrinth and reveal the truth without killing him.

I haven't really mentioned up until now, but the chief difference with the labyrinths from canon is that it's possible to talk it out with the culprits' souls and have them reveal the truth to everyone outside the labyrinth. There's no need to execute the culprit every single time. With the soul returning to the culprit, changed, the labyrinth fades away on its own. So essentially, Yuma and co. won't have to use Shinigami's emergency exit. (人◕ω◕) Shinigami can remain contracted to Yuma.

Of course that means Yuma won't regain his memories... But he's fine with that in the end~ Because all the mysteries have been solved. Makoto is going to tell Kanai Ward everything, and he's going to strive to open their city up to the world and allow them opportunities to leave. Amaterasu will develop innovations to help them deal with their weakness to sunlight. Hearing the truth will be hard for the citizens, especially for the Rescue Squad... But the people of Kanai Ward will endure.

And the NDA... Well... (人◕ω◕) Yakou thinks he'll be on his own again, everyone else returning to the WDO for new assignments... But he's floored when he's wrong. Yuma, for one, resolves to stay and help the NDA. Kanai Ward still needs detectives... They're at a crossroads now, with Peacekeepers receiving a major overhaul, Amaterasu coming back from years of corruption. Yuma might not have the memories, but he knows that he used to be #1 of the WDO, and as he currently is... He can't lead the organization. Yuma would rather work here, where he knows he can still make a difference. (人◕ω◕) The train gang that he came here with pretty much agree to stay, too, for their own reasons. Desuhiko, Halara, Vivia, and Fubuki will at least go back to the WDO for the election to decide the new #1, but then they'll probably come back to help as detectives~ Their time here wasn't long, but they're loyal to each other and to Yakou. It's enough to make the poor guy bawl his eyes out. He's touched. (人◕ω◕)

Kurumi graduates from Aetheria Academy soon after everything resolves, and she remains the city's informant - although with the detectives' help, she may find new informants willing to step up, to learn from her~ Yuma remained here because of his bonds with the few people of Kanai Ward that he's gotten to know these past several weeks. He has an ever-deepening bond with Kurumi and her friends, and the Resistance.

Yuma still has plans to travel the world someday... He may or may not settle in Kanai Ward forever... But he's in no rush to leave. And even if he ever does depart, Yuma will have a bunch of... buddies... tagging along. (人◕ω◕) ... Alright, they're his girlfriends. No use beating around the bush. He can't deny that he loves them all, and they love him. ... A lot. (人◕ω◕) Sure, certain girls are more competitive and greedy... But Kurumi's one of the ones willing to share Yuma. Yoshiko, Waruna, Kurane, Fubuki, Pucci... They're all good people. She wouldn't keep Yuma from them~

... Guillaume is an interesting one, but more on her later. (人◕ω◕)

Surprisingly, Kurumi is slower on the "I wanna marry Yuma" campaign... She's content to just be with him. Yoshiko, Waruna, and Kurane are more ambitious. ... Or in Kurane's case, she just... needs him. Very badly. (人◕ω◕) Pucci is ambitious, too. Fubuki more goes with the flow. Guillaume is... Guillaume. There's no rush for baby Yuma's, either. Not for Kurumi, at least. Not to say Kurumi wouldn't like having a family with Yuma; the idea is very appealing. It's just... Kurumi's deeply flustered with that intimate stuff. The really, really intimate stuff. Hugs and kisses are great, she likes cuddling, but taking off clothes and doing..... that... Kurumi's not horny. It's too embarrassing for her. In the beginning, anyway. Kurumi is beaten out by her friends in this instance; each of them having their reasons for craving Yuma on that physical level. (人◕ω◕)

Nevertheless, Kurumi does form a family with Yuma someday. Makoto was gracious enough to give Yuma and his ladies residence in Kanai Tower, and later he also helps oversee the building of a proper "home" for all of them... Of course it has to be big. There's seven of them plus Yuma. And then you throw in their kids... Yuma's life is very busy with seven lovers, but he doesn't regret loving them. (人◕ω◕) Kurumi's one of the gentler, "fun" moms. And she's second in maturity, only losing out to Yoshiko on that front. ... But that's cuz Yoshiko's used to being a mother figure, even before her children were born.

The rain never stops in Kanai Ward... But now Kurumi and everyone else knows it's there to protect them. And with the NDA alive and thriving in the new Kanai Ward... With Yuma there... Life had never been sweeter for Kurumi-chan. (人◕ω◕)

[my-gf-is-kazuichi-soda]

Kind of a drabble about adding Miu to my romantic f/os

I've never been so indecisive about adding a (romantic) f/o.

like. I even used to selfship with Wario (even though I never blogged about it. that was one of my earliest selfships).

but...

like...

nggh! on the one hand, Miu is mean, and gross. on the other hand, she's lonely and self-destructive, and I want to make sure she's alright. she's already our friend that we check up on a lot, and got Mikan and Shuichi and Kaede to check up on her too, and we all ended up peer pressuring her to stop turning to drugs or other self-destructive tendencies because she couldn't stop picturing our "sad little faces" (I was touched when Kaz told me she said that. I hadn't asked her to stop doing drugs, the topic makes me feel too awkward, but the others had and I guess with how worried we all were about her, it made her want to work on herself.) But she still seems lonely, and also jealous of a lot of her friends dating each other, especially me and Kaz and Tenko.

so uh, maybe we could fix her with kisses.

(or maybe she'd make us worse? lol)

also, the chaotic potential of adding Miu to the group is hilarious. (in hindsight, the anon that asked me about adding Toko to the group was almost prophesizing 👀).

I've...already got headcanons for her with our kids... I think I trapped myself with this...

like, of all the things to push me to this brink...

(this is so random) have you ever seen Defunctland: The Awful Wiggles Dark Ride?

I found myself thinking about me, Kaz, and Tenko bringing our three kids when they're all still little on this ride (let's pretend it's still in operation, or maybe it got abandoned but it's still there and Kazuichi could get it in working order. So could Miu tbh.)

I couldn't picture us riding this without Miu there as well. We would all enjoy it, mostly because of the kids (I feel like Miu would have the most childlike wonder about it and Kazuichi would still be rambling about the technical stuff an hour later. Especially if it was the broken version where the tvs or rooms would be on/off at the wrong times. Tenko would be the least likely to enjoy the ride itself (which is like me as well, but I've at least got a little nostalgia for the Wiggles), but she's got an excited toddler bouncing on her lap, so she's pretty focused on that.

So after imagining that, I ended up coming up with headcanons about Miu with our kids.

When the first baby (Ren) is born, Miu is the clingiest out of all of us to this baby and keeps saying they're "the spittin' image of me!" (meaning herself). This is false, the baby's bio parents are me and Kaz and they very much look like a combination of us two. Still, we know this is Miu's way of saying she adores this baby. We're not worried about her being unhealthily attached though; she's still pretty busy with invention ideas and always hands the baby back to one of us when she needs to go work on those, or when we ask her to (but only me, Kaz, and Tenko. She glares at anyone else who asks to hold the baby, lol.)

(Pregnancy, and specifically fictional trans woman pregnancy mentioned in next paragraph. Not sure if anyone needs that as a trigger warning, but just in case. I know pregnancy in general can bring up complicated feelings for people).

I was pregnant with the first baby and picked out the name Ren (who later came out as nonbinary). Tenko was pregnant with the second baby, a girl, and picked out the name Aimi. Miu was able to transfer the third pregnancy to herself and become one of the first pregnant trans women in the world (I feel like it is pretty in-character for her to not only try this but end up being successful. Let me dream okay?) She also had a baby girl. We all asked Miu first if she had a name in mind, but Miu didn't want to pick a name and likes most of the names we suggest anyway. Kazuichi picked the name Yoshi. So our kids are Ren, Aimi, and Yoshi.

Not sure when/if I'll draw fanart and write stories for all of this (maybe the Wiggles car ride though), I feel weird about selfshipping with Miu and Tenko even though I'm still writing the fanfic about just me and Kaz (and that fanfic will definitely take a while). But I'm holding myself to ridiculous standards. I can ship with them just because. I also worry about being unfair by focusing on Kazuichi the most, but I know it's okay to have a main f/o.

[itsjustthechems]

Excerpt from the fic I'm working on about Deacon's origin story (spoilers!)

If you haven't reached max affinity with Deacon, this post contains spoilers about his final affinity dialogue.

This fic is going to cover his time as a gang member in the University Point Deathclaws, meeting and falling in love with Barbara (who I've decided is a caravan trader), avenging her murder, and finding his place in the Railroad. Later chapters will include his escapades with my fem!Sole Survivor OC, Georgie. Or maybe I'll just post drabbles and random chapters out of order, lol. Who knows. Anyway, enjoy this little excerpt, and let me know if anyone would be interested in reading more.

Context for this scene: Deacon is about 20 here - nearly two decades before the events of the game. Keep in mind that he is young, stupid, and brutal with ass-backwards views at this point in his life. He was sent on a dangerous solo mission to purloin munition from a poorly-manned Gunner stash in Jamaica Plain (a careless decision by the reckless leader of the Deathclaws), and Barbara's trading partner has fallen ill, leaving her to manage business on her own. He encounters her being harassed by a chem addict shaking her down for a fix, and the encounter turns violent. Afterwards, since night has fallen, they hole up together in an empty house, eager to avoid any further conflict until sunrise.

------

“Hey.” Barbara’s voice was soft and tentative, an abrupt change from the goofy timbre of her storytelling.

“Howdy.”

“Thank you for…not killing that guy earlier. He would have had it coming to him, but I’m glad you let him live.”

Deacon froze. That guy didn’t bite it? That was news. She must have seen him still breathing before they fled the scene. “Anytime, toots. For you, I’d let a thousand slimy crooks live.”

The air fell silent and somber, and he hoped to Atom that his feigned flirtatiousness didn’t set her off. He tried to be clearly ingenuine when he made those jokes to her. The fact that she was alone, vulnerable, and holed up with, well, a slimy crook wasn’t lost on him. He knew the sort of fear and disgust he probably instilled in her. Much to his relief, she gave a quiet snort and let it slide.

“I’m serious, though. I want you to know that it doesn’t go unnoticed when you do the right thing. You’ve been cleaning up your act lately and I…I like it.” Her usual eloquence was clearly stunted by the liquor, bashful awkwardness on full display for his enjoyment. Boy, did he enjoy it.

“Yeah?” He egged her on with a chuckle, hoping she’d keep rambling. Preferably about him. If all it took to earn a little attention from her was not swiping from other traders in front of her - which was clearly the new habit she was referring to, then he’d gladly take the threats and glares it earned him for coming back to camp empty-handed. So what if it made him look soft? He wasn’t soft! Or maybe she was talking about that time he’d thrown a kid a few caps to buy an issue of Grognak the Barbarian off her...uh oh.

“Yeah.” Her cheeks burned pink as she studied the floor like she was going to be quizzed on it later. “Knowing you, it’s probably some kind of elaborate prank that you’re pulling on me, but I hope that isn’t the case. Integrity looks good on you.”

“Thanks, I suppose, but I’m unfamiliar with this ‘integrity’ you speak of. Is it French?”

Barbara groaned, the couch creaking in protest as she fell against the back of it, looking dramatically defeated. He took that as encouragement to continue, his grin wide and shit-eating.

“Besides, everything looks good on me. As a matter of fact, you should see me in my birthday suit.”

He watched smugly as she tilted her head back up to fix him with a glare, though it lacked any malevolence. The glare was brief and gave way to an expression of discomfort, or perhaps anxiety.

There’s the nausea, Deacon thought. Heh. Lightweight. If he wasn’t close enough to smell the spirits on her breath, he would attribute the cause of her sudden queasiness to his jokes, but he knew she rarely drank, let alone straight liquor.

He grunted and pitched forward onto his feet to fetch her some kind of receptacle to defile instead of her own clothes and bedroll, but to his bewilderment, he was met with a hand on his chest, tipping him back to his seated position before her. Oh. She’s not sick at all.

[rel-bis]

Finally playing Scarlet 😭😭 rambling below

I LOVE THIS GAME SO MUCH IM HAVING SO MUCH FUN IM JUST AKDJFJFN I LOVE POKEMON SO MUCH 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

About the technical issues: I've challenged 6 bosses so far and I genuinely have not encountered any big glitches or anything, the game has run just fine for me. Theres some occasional lagginess, but nothing that really got in the way

Ok actually I just saw like one visual bug, when I went into a Tera Raid and terastalized my pokemon and my trainer just straight up disappeared, but it soon fixed itself lol

Some of the frame drops are def annoying(Like that class introduction cutscene where the students are moving like 2fps, wtf was that 😭 And the grass gym's sunfloras lmaooo) but yeah thats about it

Idk maybe its because I've been playing in short-ish intervals, as I've heard the memory leak gets really bad when you play for a while without restarting the game. But the fandom reaction made this game seem unplayable, and its legit been a completely normal experience for me lol

The main thing that bothers me is just the lack of customization tbh. I thought I would get over this but nah its SUCH a downgrade, the customization in SwSh was so complete, I can't accept this shit 😭 why does Penny get to wear normal clothes and I dont 😭😭😭😭

When they said the game had 3 storylines but no level scaling, I thought ok, guess I'll raise 3 different teams, but I love the fact that each storyline's level cap complements each other and they're kinda meant to be done all at the same time. Sure, the fact theres no level scaling sucks and kinda defeats the idea of "do whatever you want" since theres clearly a set order to the bosses, but it doesn't bother me personally

Anyway, I just love the characters, the environments, the CITIES oh god i waste so much time just exploring each city and talking to everyone lol I'm genuinely just having so much fun, I didn't hate SwSh but it did NOT felt like this lol

I love the fact Koraidon/Miraidon is your ride pokemon and is treated like a 7th mon. I love how when you have a picnic Koraidon also joins in and you can play with it, its a nice touch, gives the legendaries more personality

I havent advanced much in any story to say much about it so maybe I'll make another post later, but for now thats it, i have hyperfixation brainrot and i love pokemon so much and i aksjddjajsj 🥹