#this is probably the last scan i'll share from this series

[hotwaterandmilk]

Series: Hotaru no Yomeiri Artist: Tachibana Oreco Product: Honya Club 'Zenkoku Shotenin ga Eranda Osusume Comic 2024' With-Purchase Illustration Card (02/2024) Source: Scanned from my personal collection

[nightwriter357]

Just Friends 7 - This is completely innocent

Hiii everyone! It's been a while, but I'm back with Part 7 of my Damien Haas x reader series - Just Friends! Thank you all so much for your patience and support (and hello to all the new people) I'm super excited to share this chapter with you, and I've got more coming soon – I plan to post another part before Christmas! Hope you enjoy this one!

You stand outside Damien's door, his shirt folded neatly in your hands. It feels heavier than it should, like it carries the weight of all the questions you're too afraid to ask. The plan was simple—knock, return it, leave. But now that you're here, your courage is wavering.

Still, you knock softly. Once. Twice. No answer.

You hesitate, glancing down the hall. He's probably not even here, you tell yourself. Just leave it on the door handle and—

"Damien?" you call out, pushing the door open slightly.

The room is quiet, faintly smelling of laundry detergent and something distinctly him. You step inside, your eyes scanning the space. It's tidy, the bed neatly made, but it feels lived-in, warm.

And then your gaze lands on his nightstand.

You blink, stepping closer. Propped against the lamp is a strip of photo booth pictures, its edges slightly curled. It's the photos from your fake date. In the photos, your laughter practically jumps off the glossy paper, you throwing your head back laughing, Damien squinting through an exaggerated smile, and that last frame where you're caught looking at each other almost close enough to kiss.

You swallow hard, a warmth spreading up your neck as you pick up the photostrip.

You whirl around, clutching his shirt and the photo strip in your hands like they're evidence of a crime. He leans casually against the frame, arms crossed, his brow quirked in curiosity.

Damien's voice startles you, low and slightly amused from the doorway.

"What are you doing here?"

"I, uh..." you stammer, your mind racing for an excuse. "I was just... returning this!" You lift the shirt slightly, hoping it sells your story.

 You roll your eyes but fail to keep the flustered edge out of your voice. "I didn't know you kept it there."

His eyes flick to the photo strip in your other hand, and he nods toward it. "And stealing that?"

Damien takes another step closer, his gaze falling on the photo in your hand. "It's not like it's special or anything. I just... I liked the vibe of that day"

You shrug, trying for nonchalance. " Sure."

His lips twitch into a half-smile. "It's not like I pull it out to look at you every night before I fall asleep."

He shrugs, his voice dropping slightly. "It's not like it's the last thing I look at before bed every night."

You snort, folding your arms, the photo strip still clutched tightly between your fingers. "Right. It's not like you kiss it good night or anything."

The words hang in the air, weighty and unintentional. His eyes widen slightly, a flicker of regret flashing across his face, but he doesn't try to backtrack.

You clear your throat and hold up the shirt in your hand. "Anyway! I was just deciding if I should keep this or not."

He raises an eyebrow, his amusement returning. "You mean my shirt? The one you wore last week?"

You lift your chin defiantly. "Yeah. I was gonna give it back, but I've decided I'm keeping it. It's mine now."

His smirk widens. "Oh, is it? Do I get a say in that?"

"No," you reply simply, folding the shirt over your arm like you've already won.

"Bold of you," he says, his gaze flicking to the shirt before returning to your face.

"Yeah." You nod firmly, folding your arms across your chest, the shirt crinkling in your grip. "But don't worry—I'll replace it with one of mine. The sluttiest little crop top I own."

He doesn't miss a beat. "You mean the white lace one?"

You freeze, staring at him. "The white lace one?"

"Yeah," he says, voice steady, like it just slipped out.

Your jaw drops. "You're out of your mind! It barely has cleavage!"

"Exactly," he replies smoothly. "Maybe it's the barely that does it."

"You're delusional!" you say, your face heating as you glare at him. "It's the most PG thing I own!"

His smirk widens."PG? Sure. If the P stands for 'practically transparent."

You squint at him, trying to bite back a laugh. "Okay, genius. If the P stands for 'practically transparent,' what does the G stand for?"

He pauses, clearly caught off guard, but then his grin sharpens. "Gorgeous."

Your jaw drops. "Oh, shut up. That was way toooo smooth."

"Smooth?" he teases, leaning in slightly. "It's not like I rehearsed it or anything."

"Right," you shoot back, rolling your eyes. "You've been sitting here, practicing lines in the mirror, just waiting for the day someone would ask you what the G stands for."

"And it finally paid off," he quips, shrugging like he's just scored a point. 

"Please." You shake your head, but the grin tugging at your lips betrays you. "It's classy and sweet and... and innocent!"

"Innocent," he repeats, his tone dripping with mock disbelief. "Sure. Except for the part where it's thin enough to read through in bad lighting."

"You're impossible," you mutter, shaking your head, though a traitorous smile tugs at your lips.

He chuckles softly, stepping closer, his smirk fading into something more genuine. His gaze lingers, warm and intent, and when he speaks again, his voice is lower, almost hesitant. "You really don't see it, do you?"

"See what?" you ask, frowning, your defenses rising instinctively against the sudden change in his tone.

He exhales through his nose, shaking his head like he's almost frustrated with you—not in a bad way, but in that way someone gets when they want to make you understand something so clearly obvious to them. "The last time you wore that top out, I saw five guys practically break their necks trying to get a glimpse of you."

You scoff, brushing him off with a wave of your hand. "That's not true. Nobody was looking at me."

His voice drops, and something shifts in his expression—something that feels like it's been carefully held back for too long. "You're oblivious to how completely entranced someone can be by you," he murmurs, his words almost reverent.

There's no teasing left in his tone, no smirk to soften the weight of his gaze as it lingers on you. It's the kind of look that makes your skin feel too warm, like he's seeing something in you that you're not ready to face. "The way you move, the way you laugh—" He exhales a shaky breath, as if realizing he's said too much but unable to stop. "It's... impossible not to notice you."

"Okay!" you blurt, breaking the moment and stepping past him toward the door. "I'm keeping the shirt."

He steps aside, letting you pass, but his voice follows you, low and teasing again. "You can keep the shirt. Just make sure I get that top in return."

You throw him a halfhearted glare over your shoulder. "Don't hold your breath."

His brow quirks in that familiar, cocky way. "What if I'm underwater?"

You pause, glancing back at him with a raised brow. "You'll drown."

His grin returns, but there's still something softer beneath it. You make your way into the hallway and press your back against the wall, clutching the shirt to your chest. Your heart races as the weight of his words—and the way he looked at you—settles in your mind.

You need to talk to someone before you spiral completely. That's how you find yourself heading to Angela's apartment.

You knock twice, sharp and quick, before stepping back and crossing your arms, still clutching Damien's shirt in your hand. Your head spins, replaying every teasing word he said, the way his grin lingered, making you feel like he knew exactly how to unravel you.

Angela's muffled voice filters through the door. "Coming!" A moment later, the door swings open to reveal her in a sweatshirt two sizes too big and fuzzy socks. She eyes you curiously, taking in your frazzled expression and the shirt in your hand.

"Okay, what happened?" she asks, skipping pleasantries entirely. "You look like you've just walked off a rom-com set. Did Damien finally kiss you, or are we still stuck in will-they-won't-they hell?"

You groan, pushing past her into the apartment. "He did not kiss me, Angela."

"Bummer," she quips, closing the door behind you. "By the way, my crazy roommate is out on one of their adventures, so we have the place to ourselves. For now."

You pace into her living room, throwing yourself onto the couch with a dramatic sigh. "I just— I'm overthinking everything. Again."

Angela plops down beside you, tucking her legs beneath her. "What things? Spill."

You hold up the shirt, waving it for emphasis. "I was going to return this, okay? I went to his room, and he wasn't there, so I... went in to leave it."

Her brow lifts. "So you broke into his room?"

"No! The door was open!" you insist, glaring at her before groaning again. "But I saw something on his nightstand. A photo booth strip of us from the fake date."

Angela blinks, her expression softening. "Wait, he has pictures of you on his nightstand?"

"Yeah," you say, voice dropping. "I mean, it's not that big of a deal, right? People keep pictures of their friends all the time."

Angela snorts. "Not on their nightstands, they don't."

You roll your eyes at her response. "Angela."

"I'm just saying!" She throws up her hands in mock innocence. "Nightstands are for essentials, like a lamp, a book, maybe your phone. If you're putting a photo there, it means something."

"I don't know," you admit, staring at the shirt still clutched in your hand. "I mean, we both went on dates with other people last Friday and I don't even really know how his went?"

Angela's brow furrows. "Last Friday? Damien wasn't on a date."

You blink at her. "What?"

She shrugs. "I saw him and Shayne in the laundry room that night. They were folding towels and arguing about fabric softener."

Your mouth opens, then closes.

"Guess he can't have a one-night stand because of what's on his nightstand," Angela says with a smirk.

You groan, tossing a pillow at her. "You're the worst."

"And you're in denial," she shoots back, catching the pillow with ease.

You twist Damien's shirt nervously in your lap, staring down at the crumpled fabric. "I guess it could be possible that Damien actually likes me," you say softly, the words strange and uncertain in your voice.

Angela, lounging opposite you with a mug of tea, perks up immediately. "Uh, yeah. Obviously. You're just now figuring that out?"

You shoot her a look, your nerves fraying. "But I don't think he's, you know... attracted to me."

Angela freezes mid-sip, her eyes narrowing at you over the rim of her mug. She sets it down with deliberate care, like she needs both hands free to deal with the nonsense you've just spewed. "Hold on. What?"

"I'm serious," you insist, feeling defensive under her incredulous stare. "He's always really sweet, but that doesn't mean he—"

"Stop," Angela interrupts, holding up a hand. "You're telling me that the guy who kissed you outside the club, went on a date with you, and told you that the only thing he'd change about you to make you the perfect woman was your taste in men—"

You blink at her, caught off guard. "It wasn't like that! It was all... fake."

"Fake? Girl, he spent his night doing laundry with Shayne instead of going on a date and he has pictures of the two of you on his nightstand." Angela deadpans. "Come on. It's so obvious he's into you."

You roll your eyes, heat creeping into your face. "Not like that."

Angela leans forward, her grin growing sly. "Alright, let's test your theory. You think he's not attracted to you? Fine. Prove it."

Your stomach tightens. "What are we talking about?"

Angela sits back, crossing her arms like she's just cracked the code to the universe. "Dress a little sexy when you go back home. Throw him off balance. Watch how he reacts."

You groan, sinking deeper into the couch. "That's your brilliant idea? Play dress-up?"

"Exactly," Angela says, beaming. "Trust me, one look at you in something hot, and he'll either faint or confess on the spot."

You hesitate, the idea both terrifying and oddly thrilling. "What would I even wear?"

Angela's grin turns downright wicked. "Oh, that slutty little white lace top?"

"Not you too, it is not slutty!" you protest, grabbing a throw pillow and swatting her with it.

"It's a little slutty," she teases, dodging the pillow effortlessly. "The last time you wore it, I saw six guys checking you out."

You bite your lip, nerves and curiosity warring inside you. "This feels like a bad idea."

"The good ones always do," Angela insists, grabbing her mug and leaning back like she's already won. "And you'll thank me when he's too busy drooling to deny he's into you."

You groan again, heading for the door, pausing just long enough to send Angela a playful, reluctant glare. She’s already back to watching her show, totally unfazed. Shaking your head, you pull open the door and step out.

You step into your shared apartment, closing the door behind you quietly. The familiar hum of the TV filters in from the living room, and you catch Damien's low chuckle, probably at whatever show he's watching. You pause, leaning against the door for a moment.

Your room is just down the hall. Taking a deep breath, you make your way there, your heart hammering with every step. Once inside, you kick off your shoes and rifle through your closet until your fingers land on the hanger holding the white lace top.

You pull it on without a second thought, the fabric snug against your skin as you smooth it over your torso. The delicate floral lace is even more striking under the dim lighting, leaving no room for doubt about its impact. Pairing it with your favorite jeans, you run a hand through your hair and take a steadying breath. You glance at your reflection one last time, Angela's voice echoing: "If he's really into you, he'll notice."

The sound of the TV grows louder as you step into the living room. Damien's sprawled on the couch, one arm draped along the backrest, his socked feet propped up on the coffee table. Shayne's nowhere to be seen—probably in his room.

Damien looks up as you walk in, his eyes flicking up from the screen to you. For a moment, his expression freezes. His gaze lingers, snagging on the lace, before he abruptly looks back to your face.

"Hey," he greets, his voice lower than usual, almost hesitant.

"Hey," you reply, your own voice light, betraying none of the nerves buzzing in your chest. You take the seat at the far end of the couch, keeping a safe distance, but you can feel his eyes on you even as you settle in.

“What?” you ask, tilting your head, a small smile tugging at your lips.

 “Nothing,” he says quickly, rubbing the back of his neck. "It’s just... that top. I thought it was supposed to be mine now"

 You glance down at the lace fabric, smoothing it over your stomach. “Thought I’d give it one last wear.”

Damien's gaze flickers to it briefly before returning to your face. “Right. Makes sense.”

You smirk, your fingers grazing the lace as if testing its softness. “You’re really fixated on this top, aren’t you?”

His lips quirk into a faint smile, though his gaze doesn’t quite meet yours. “Can you blame me?”

You raise a brow, caught off guard by the quiet intensity in his tone. “It’s just a top, Damien.”

“Sure,” he says, his voice lower now. 

You hum, pretending to focus on the screen, though your heart pounds in your chest. The silence stretches, and while Damien's body remains angled toward the TV, his gaze doesn't follow. You feel it—how it dips, hovers, and snaps back, like he's trying to work something out without giving himself away.

“You don’t like it?” you tease lightly, raising a brow.

Damien huffs a soft laugh, but it sounds a little strained. “I didn’t say that.”

The corner of your mouth quirks up. “You seem distracted.”

“I’m fine,” he insists, though his fingers tap an uneven rhythm against the couch.

“Uh-huh,” you murmur, leaning back into the cushions. The lace shifts again as you move, and out of the corner of your eye, you catch his jaw tightening.

The silence stretches between you, heavy with the unspoken. Damien's eyes linger on you, and you shift slightly, feeling the weight of it without really knowing what to do with it.

After a beat, you glance up at Damien, a small smile tugging at the corner of your lips. “Can I ask you something totally hypothetical?”

He raises an eyebrow, clearly intrigued. “Hypothetical, huh? Go for it.”

You bite your lip, considering how to phrase it, the words on the tip of your tongue. “If I wasn’t me, and you weren’t you,” you begin hesitantly, “would you be attracted to me?”

He blinks at you, his brow furrowing slightly. “Would I be attracted to you if you weren’t you? Then I don’t know… who would you be?”

You huff, rolling your eyes. “No, I mean—uh—what if I was still me, and you were still you, but we weren’t... us?”

His lips curve into a faint smile as he considers it. “So, you’d still look like you? Feel like you? Act like you?”

“Yes, I’d be me,” you say, a little impatient now.

He pauses for just a moment, brow furrowing as he considers your question carefully. When he speaks, it’s quieter than usual, almost as though the answer is slipping out despite his better judgment. ‘I’d say yes.

Your cheeks flush, and you cross your arms over your chest, trying to ignore the warmth spreading through you. “Wow, Damien, that’s a totally inappropriate thing to say to a friend.”

He smirks, his confidence returning. “It’s this damn sheer lace top.”

You roll your eyes but don’t stop yourself from leaning closer, catching the way his gaze lingers just a moment too long. “It’s not even that bad,” you counter, grabbing his hand and guiding it to the fabric bellow your collarbone without really thinking.

Damien’s fingers brush against the lace, his touch light but searing, sending a ripple of heat through your body. His eyes snap up to meet yours, and for a moment, neither of you moves.

The lace feels impossibly delicate under his hand, but the warmth of his fingers seeps through it, spreading across your skin like fire. His breath catches slightly, his chest rising and falling just a bit faster now.

"Yeah," he murmurs, voice low and rough, the corner of his mouth twitching into a slight smile. "You’re right."

Your breath hitches as Damien’s thumb brushes against your skin beneath the lace, the sensation searing through you. He rubs the lace between his fingers, the heat of him a stark contrast to the cool air in the room. The space between you feels charged, every breath, every shift in the cushions amplifying the tension.

The sound of the TV fades into the background as your focus sharpens on him—on the way his eyes move to your lips for the briefest moment before snapping back to your eyes, and you feel it—the pull between you, thickening the air.

It’s as though the room has gone still—just the two of you, trapped in a moment where neither of you can speak, but still some things almost feel like they are being said. His fingers twitch slightly, and the sensation makes your stomach flip.

"This is completely innocent," Damien mutters, his voice thick with the weight of irony, the words almost a quiet confession to the tension between you both.

He doesn’t pull away. Neither do you. And it feels inevitable now—something will happen between you two.. Some day.

[yaniluvs]

𝒾𝒾𝒾 ┆ 𖡎 (승민) : STARS AND RAINDROPS “ 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑖’𝑑 𝑔𝑙𝑎𝑑𝑙𝑦 𝑏𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑘 𝑚𝑦 𝘩𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑦𝑜𝑢.. ” ── great, your crush-best friend just invited his crush to your hangout.

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𓍯 bsf!seungmin ʚଓ fem!reader ：（ 𝒾 ） 1.5k ── ༯ SERiES, angst, mature, fluff, comfort, petnames, unrequited love, melancholy, one sided, skz ensemble, music students, happy ending, trio of seungsung and reader, uni au. ⸝⸝𓂃 LiBRARY. /ᐠ.ꞈ.ᐟ\ྀིྀི

yani's note ˖˙ ᰋ fun chapter, jisung yapping as usual, had fun writing this heh. taglist for all fics/this series is open, so are requests. i'll try to stay as consistent as i can ;3. comments, likes and reblogs are always appreciated ! happy reading <3

the three strolled to the small bench they always shared in the garden, ice creams in hand, the air around them thick with the scent of rain that had yet to fall. jisung, as usual, was full of energy, bouncing between topics as if the silence were something to be defeated. seungmin, in contrast, was quiet, his eyes scanning the horizon as he occasionally chimed in with a wry remark or two.

the girl had quietly sat on the bench, slightly apart from them, her journal in her lap as her eyes drifted across the pages. she wasn’t writing, not yet—just flipping through the fragments of her thoughts. she wasn’t in the mood to speak much, and she didn’t have to. 

as y/n sat quietly on the bench, flipping through the pages of her journal, seungmin and jisung sprawled out on the grass nearby.

"do you think you'd survive in a zombie apocalypse?" jisung asked suddenly, taking a big bite of his ice cream as he glanced over at seungmin.

the guy raised an eyebrow, wiping his mouth. “where in the world did that come from?” and the squirrel-guy just shrugged in response.

slightly side-eyeing the guy beside him, seungmin spoke. "you? in a zombie apocalypse?" he scoffed. "you’d trip over your own feet before a single zombie even showed up."

and jisung gasped in exaggerated offence. “excuse me? i have incredible survival instincts. i’d be the last one standing, okay? you’d be the one complaining about the lack of the internet.”

seungmin rolled his eyes, leaning back on his hands. "first of all, i won’t even need wifi. and second, you’d be too busy vlogging the whole thing to actually fight off zombies."

jisung groaned, dramatically clutching his chest, whining. “y/n look, he’s being mean again for no reason.”

the girl briefly looked up at the call of her name, seemingly distracted, before looking back to her journal, “whatever min said,” she babbled randomly, clearly not knowing the convo.

seungmin laughed at the guy’s dumbfounded expression, a smirk tugging at his lips.

“it’s because i’m the heart of this friend group, that’s why,” jisung said, puffing out his chest with mock pride. “without me, everything would be boring and depressing. admit it, min. you’d miss me if i got eaten by zombies.”

seungmin laughed, shaking his head, when the girl spoke again, her gaze fixed onto the book on her lap. “ji, he probably wouldn’t even notice your absence.”

“touché,”

jisung huffed, throwing his hands in the air. “i bet you would notice, though, y/nnie!” he glanced over at her, but she was back to quietly writing in her journal, completely immersed.

seungmin followed jisung’s gaze and gave a small smile before turning back to him. "she’d probably miss you just so she could have someone to make fun of."

"well?" jisung grinned triumphantly. "even my insults have value. i provide endless entertainment."

seungmin shook his head, but the smile on his face lingered. “you’re lucky i tolerate you.”

“oh, come on, you love me,” jisung teased, leaning over and nudging seungmin with his shoulder. "i’m your favourite, right?"

seungmin leaned away, narrowing his eyes. "you’re… tolerable. barely."

“wow,” jisung said, rolling his eyes, “you really know how to make a guy feel special, min.”

"i aim to please," seungmin deadpanned.

as the golden hour bathed the park in a soft, amber hue, the brunette’s gaze wandered across the sprawling canvas of the evening. the air was cool, tinged with the faint scent of summer blooms, and the distant murmur of city life seemed like a gentle backdrop to the moment.

then his eyes fell upon the girl, seated on the worn wooden bench beneath a sprawling oak tree. her presence was an understated symphony against the natural beauty around her. 

her dark hair, flowing in silky waves, caught the dying light like a raven’s feather dipped in twilight. the strands framed her face with a certain grace, slipping through her fingers as she adjusted her position, her movements delicate and unhurried.

her soft, azure blouse draped over her shoulders like a whisper, the fabric catching the wind with a subtle shimmer. she seemed to merge seamlessly with the twilight, her attire complementing her poised, yet introspective demeanour.

in that moment, she appeared both serene and distant, her focus entirely absorbed by the journal cradled in her lap.

the famous journal, a leather-bound book with a hint of wear along the edges, was a vessel of her thoughts and dreams. her slender fingers danced over the pages with practised ease, every movement imbued with a silent intensity. 

her brow furrowed ever so slightly, the tip of her pen moving in graceful arcs that spoke of her inner world—one that he could only glimpse through the quiet reflection in her eyes, as she bit down onto yet another pepero.

her tinted lips, that wrapped so neatly around the chocolate coated stick, shortening with each nibble.

 seungmin felt an unfamiliar twinge in his chest, a fleeting sense of admiration that mingled with the evening’s tranquil melancholy.

 he observed her with a gaze that was tender yet distant, like a painter admiring a muse through the veil of a dream. 

there was a beauty in her quiet solitude, in the way she seemed to be lost in a realm of her own making, untouched by the external world.

yet, as he watched her, a subtle, yet firm realisation anchored itself in his thoughts. 

his heart, despite the gentle stirrings of affection he felt in her presence, was already attuned to another melody. 

the truth was a quiet storm within him, a reminder of the emotions that tethered him elsewhere. the affection he felt for her was like a soft echo in the recesses of his mind, but it was clear and unequivocal that his heart had already chosen a different path.

the knowledge was both comforting and bittersweet. 

he appreciated the serene beauty she brought to the world, her presence like a soothing balm in the complexities of life. 

but his own affections lay elsewhere, woven into the fabric of his own reality. 

he knew, as he continued to watch her, that his admiration was tempered by a reality he could not ignore.

or could he just not see.. beyond her.

with a gentle sigh, he turned his gaze away from the girl, letting the evening’s shadows deepen around him. 

he allowed himself to be drawn back into the conversation with jisung and the fading light of day, carrying with him the quiet appreciation for a friend who, in her own way, had captured a moment of his heart’s fleeting tenderness.

they stayed like that, the sun slipping lower in the sky, casting soft orange hues across the horizon as the impending storm still held off in the distance.

as the sky began to fade out of twilight, jisung stood up, stretching dramatically. “hey, what do you two think about hitting the beach tomorrow? i could use some peace and fun.”

seungmin turned to her, a soft, unreadable look in his eyes. “what d’ya think? up for it?”

the girl looked up, her brows raised slightly as she closed her journal, placing it back into her bag. “the beach? tomorrow?” she glanced back at the guy who suggested it, who only shrugged.

“yeah, i mean,” he began, “it’s a friday, we’ve all been pretty busy with uni, especially you, by the way. and it’d seem like a good time-off!”

“he’s right, you know,” the brown haired guy nudged her lightly, his left hand resting on her right shoulder. “you deserve a break, just for an evening.”

she turned her gaze towards him, eyes softening slightly, the hesitation melting away. “fine. when are we leaving?”

about 10 minutes later.

a familiar voice chimed in, pulling all three of their gazes toward the entrance of the garden. felix and eunha strolled over, waving as they approached.

“hey, you guys! what’s up?” felix grinned, his sunshine energy as contagious as ever.

jisung waved back with a grin, seungmin simply nodding in annoyance. “oh, lix, eunha, hey!”

the two approached the group, joining them on the grass. some time passed.

“we’re actually planning to head to the beach tomorrow evening. you guys wanna tag along?” seungmin asked, his tone casual but his eyes on y/n.

felix's face lit up immediately. "i'm so down. eunha?"

eunha smiled, nodding. "sounds perfect."

the girl quietly sat onto the bench, looked up at the conversation, her jaw clenching the tiniest bit. 

why in the world did he have to invite them?

it’s like she doesn’t even exist anymore – not that it matters but yeah.

another day, with eunha tagging along.

another day of seungmin trying terribly to gauge her attention.

another stupid day of stolen glances at seungmin that y/n wasn’t sure anyone else noticed—or cared about.

she had been waiting for the day, despite the hesitation. but now that eunha’s coming, she might as well skip, it wouldn’t make a difference, would it?

but she couldn’t, not to her closest pair of friends anyway.

“yay..” she cheered quietly, a faint smile playing on her lips as she tucked her journal into her bag.

but inside, she was already bracing herself for the next day, hoping the beach wouldn’t be just another backdrop to the feelings she could never quite express.

[carcarcraziiv2]

The Woman with the Pink Hair (Parts 10, 11, 12, and 13 (final))

HERE ARE THE LAST PARTS FOR THE WOMAN WITH THE PINK HAIR! I Sincerely hope you enjoyed <3. I have already started the next story in the series (oooo). Lmk if you wanna see it! <3

This is a Vi x Fem! Reader fanfiction.

Please note that this is the first piece I wrote after a HEFTY (I mean years long) hiatus from writing.

P.S. Lowkey I KNOW there's a bunch of shit I could fix in here to make it better due to my practice over the past year or so, but I just… I'm so lazy rn LOL. Anyhoooooo….

ALSO- here are the TW for you lovelies! (This is for the WHOLE SERIES)-

Violence, mental illness, oral sex, dominant tendencies, torture, kidnapping, plotting?… lowkey there's probably more but you should get the gist here, AS ALWAYS ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK ILY<3

READ PART ONE, TWO, AND THREE HERE->

https://www.tumblr.com/carcarcraziiv2/737189248110821376/the-woman-with-the-pink-hair-p-1-2-3?source=share

READ PART FOUR, FIVE, AND SIX HERE->

https://www.tumblr.com/carcarcraziiv2/738139002294747136/the-woman-with-the-pink-hair-p-4-5-6?source=share

READ PART SEVEN, EIGHT, AND NINE HERE-> https://www.tumblr.com/carcarcraziiv2/739738198020964352/the-woman-with-the-pink-hair-part-7-8-9?source=share

~~

PART TEN - Vi

 "What the hell...?", Vi said lightly, scanning the top deck of the ship she just boarded after returning from her confrontation with Kench. She was not in the mood for anything but a drink and to cuddle up with (y/n). Her stomach plummeted when she saw the small pool of blood a few feet away.

    Blind panic fills her soul, and she bolts for the stairs. Please don't be gone. Please don't be gone. She thinks to herself, silently pleading to the Gods she wasn't even sure exists. Basically jumping down the small flight of stairs into the cabin of the ship, she notices it is in disarray. The dark wooden table was flipped, and glass was shattered all over the floor. There was a trail of water from the top deck, down the stairs, leading directly to a dead stop in front of the room the two lovers were occupying.

   "Fuck, no no no!" Vi yelled, running down the hallway, and bursting into the room. The armoire was open, but there was no (y/n). "Fuck!" Her hands reached up to her hair, pulling as she fell to her knees. Her shoulders slumped, and she lowered her head and began to cry.

    After a few minutes of sobbing, Vi slowly crept up onto her feet again. No emotion on her face, her eyes glazed and icy cold. She walked over to the chest at the end of the bed and pulled it open. Inside were two large fighting gauntlets. She hadn't used them since all of the bullshit with Jayce. 

    There is no better time than the present, and she was prepared to destroy anyone in her path to finding (y/n). 

--- 🖤🖤🖤 ---

    "Please! Please! I'll do anything, just don-" Crack.

    The sickening crunch that resounded through the dark rocky cavern made you shiver. Prior to what you assumed to have been the untimely death of some other prisoner down here, the voice had sounded like a young woman, much like yourself. 

    You did not move as you waited to hear anymore sounds, shuffling, or wet slapping footsteps. Waiting nearly 20 minutes, you finally let out a gasp of breath, and crawled back to your corner where a useless excuse for a bed lay on the floor. It was nothing but a long, dirty piece of fabric. At one point, you were sure, it had been padded. 

   The cell was entirely uncomfortable, and you were sure you had been there for at least a week at this point. You prayed, which you never ever did, for someone to rescue you. The things that you and Vi shared for some reason did not fully convince you that she would want to go through the trouble of rescuing you. Hell, you didn't hardly know anything about her.

   Over the days that you had spent here, they had been sending in plates of slop, you weren't entirely certain of its origin, that smelled like absolute ass. The first few days you refused to eat, and Tahm personally came to inform you that if you didn't eat, he would either kill you or let you starve to death. You were sure no matter what you did, you had a death sentence over your head, but due to fear and your hunger you decided after the third day to finally just eat it. After today's food was delivered, a few hours after the confrontation down the hall, you heard those wet sloppy footsteps approaching the iron gate of your cell. 

    As the steps approached, you quickly scurried to the very most corner of the room, drawing your knees to your chin as you awaited and prayed that the beat would continue past. To your dismay, the large shadow enunciated by the faint candlelight in the hall stopped right before your door. 

    "(Y/N), I have some questions for you. Do you wish to comply, or are you going to make me force them from you?" The long-winded question reverberated through your body, making you tense up and tingles run down your spine. 

   You stayed silent. If there was anything you would do, talking would not be one of them.

   The creature let out a defeated sigh, and you held still, not wanting to react. Even as a tear began to fall down your face and the creature wabbled inside, and engulfed you in the rancid large mouth, you still did not struggle. 

    Mind blank, the only thought in your head was how easy it would be to break you. You had the pain tolerance of a baby and were terrified of what he might do. 

   As Tahm Kench walked, you sloshed around in the small space you were in. You could feel his long tongue wrapped around you like a rope holding you tight. Although slick and slimy, it did not budge when you dared to fidget ever so slightly. You simply squeezed your eyes shut, and forced the rising bile back down your throat as the journey quickly came to a stop. 

   He spit you out, and again you landed on a hard floor. Before you had the opportunity to take in your surroundings, two gruff pairs of hands were dragging you off the ground and sitting you onto a lone chair. Looking around, your eyes straining from the brightness, you realized that the sun was shining through a broken window to the left. In fact, it appeared that you were being kept underneath a large, abandoned boating house. 

  You were quickly snapped out of your realization when the monster began to speak..

   "Tell me, (y/n), how do you know Vi?"

   Silence.

   He let out a soft chuckle, and leaned closer to you, the motion looking hard due to the bulkiness of his body.

   "I will give you one more chance, child. How do you know Vi?" 

    Remaining silent once more, you conjured the spit in your mouth and spewed it directly into the monster's face. He took a moment to wipe the spit off of his face. Turning around, his chubby arms resting at his side, he looked over at one of his minions and nodded slightly before continuing his venture to the other side of the room. 

    Panic blossomed as you noticed what one of them was holding. In its green, wet hand you saw the sheen of a blade. You leaned as far away as you could as the creature approached you slowly, as if it was enjoying your fear. It leaned in, its face mere inches from your own, it raised the knife and pressed it to your cheek, snickering. It began to slowly press in, when you let out a sharp hiss.

    "She's my girlfriend," You said quickly, silently cursing yourself for breaking so quickly. As you realized the shit you were in, you prayed that he would not ask any in depth questions that you didn't know the answer to. You knew they wouldn't believe you. 

   Tahm turned back towards you, a long smile spreading on it's face.

   "Good," He said, and you felt he wasn't simply talking about your answer, but more so the ability to break you. 

PART ELEVEN- Unleashed

 Getting thrown back into your cell, you were wholly torn apart. The evil menace that had captured you picked you up, crumpled you in his palms, and threw you onto the ground. Entirely spent, you could not sleep, not while you knew that those demons were wandering the halls and rooms above you thinking you are hiding some important information from them. 

    You aren't.

    You hadn't a speck of knowledge aside from the things that you and Vi had shared. Kisses, long gazes, conversations about both of your childhoods. You realized, in that moment, that you didn't even know what her favorite color was. What kind of food she liked to eat or where she liked to go to get away from it all. 

    You decided that when - if - you got out of this hell hole, you were going to make a point of learning all of those things.

    Sighing, you wince as you roll over on the decrepit pad on the floor. Your ribs were bruised, at the least, if not having a few broken. Every breath you took caused a sharp lingering pain to blossom in your torso. There were small lashes on your arms, your face, and you were sticky from the sweat and blood covering your skin. As you laid there, tears falling at their own will down your cheek and onto the mattress, you prayed once more for your savior to find you.

--- 🖤🖤🖤---

---         VI         ---   

    "Tell me where the hell she is, I don't want this to be harder than it needs to be, Illaoi. Please, please just tell me," Vi seethed, her fists where clenched inside the large foreboding gauntlets.  Her heart was racing and breaking beneath her white tank top, her thick arms straining with the stress coursing through her veins. 

    Before her, Illaoi sat in an old brown leather chair, her legs spread and her forearms resting on her knees. Her fists were held together, acting as a podium in which she rest her sodden and tired face. 

    "Vi, I don't know where he keeps them. I only know where his base is. I am telling you this because I have been bound to that monster for far too long, and I, too, want to get my revenge. But please, you must call down. He has cronies all over the town, some who may be lingering these very halls. Their hearing is keen and sharp, and they will do anything in their power to protect their boss."

    "Do you think I give a single shit about that? Take me to his base," Vi spat, her body unflinching as she gave Illaoi the option, no, the order to take her where she needed to go. She would break through every god damn house in Bilgewater if it meant finding (y/n).

    "Vi, I ca-,"

    Vi slammed her fist against the wall, making the house shake. Dust fluttered off of the shelves and ceiling, littering Vi's shoulders and arms like sad rain.

    "Take. Me. There. Now." She said calmly, but her calm demeanor only hid the wrath behind her eyes so much. Illaoi sighed, standing. She was a tall, muscular woman, and her admitting defeat was anything but that. She was willing to fight for what she believed in, even if that meant risking her life. Vi was proud of her for that and vowed silently to forever be in her favor.

     After the woman collected her items and put on a few scraps of leather and gold armor on her arms and chest, they left the small apartment that Illaoi must have called home. Vi had located it after cornering Captain Fortune in a pub a few streets down.

    It had been 5 days since Vi last saw (y/n), and she didn't dare think about the possibilities of torture, of death, that have been plaguing her little love. She seethed, gritting her teeth and choking down the lump in her throat. She would not cry, not here, not now. Not while she needs to be strong.

    Illaoi led her down a few wary streets, venturing down a few blocks from where they started. They ended up at some old rotting docks, the boards broken and falling into the stinking sea beneath them.  

    "That boat house, down at the end. That is where Kench and his men do their biddings. I will not proceed, but I will be here, waiting. Yell if you need me, and I will come to you. I will help you, for the sake of defeating Kench."

    Vi merely nodded, her fists clenching within her gauntlets as she strode towards the decrepit building. The place smelled this shit, like him, and she was not happy about the concept that (y/n) may be here somewhere. 

    The thought rattled her, that she could be a mere few feet away and Vi wouldn't even know. She silently begged the gods that she was here, simply so that she could rescue her as soon as possible.

    Approaching the large rusted doors, Vi didn't care about silently entering. She slammed through them with her gauntlets, making the whole building shake as the door shattered in front of her. She stomped in, over the broken wooden splinters littering the floor. Across the warn concrete floor, there was a table of cronies playing cards and shooting shit with each other. They all looked up in unison, gaping at Vi before everything broke into chaos. 

    Two of them approached her, unsheathing sharp twisting blades and stalking in her direction. Vi cracked her neck and rolled her shoulders, and snarled as she began stalking towards her. 

    The one on the right lashed out, and she quickly parried it by bringing her massive metal fists up and smashing it against its body, making it fly to the wall beside them. It slunk to the ground, grunting with no appearance that it was going to stand. The second one ran at her, and she turned 45 degrees to her right, launching her fist into the creature's face. A sick crunching sound reverberated through the building, and it fell to the ground before her. 

    It held its nose and whimpered slightly as Vi lent down to grasp its dirty hole ridden shirt. She lifted it, her face a mere inches from her own.

    "Where is she?" She snarled.

    "I don't know who you're talking about," the creature snickered back. She could tell it was lying and that made her even more feral.

    "I will cut out your tongues and feed them to your cowering brothers," she threatened, pointing at the two others who were running towards a door in the back of the building. 

    A door she hadn't noticed before. A door she was sure led to the very captor she was looking for. 

    She shoved the monster to the ground, and it grunted on impact as she raised her fist again and punched his face into the ground. When she stood, the creature did not stir. She wasn't sure if it was dead or not, but she didn't care. The other that she had fought was still on the other side of the huge room, its body slouched against the base of the wall.

   Quiet, almost silent screams echoed below Vi's feet.

   She's here. She's here. She's here.

    Vi stormed towards the back of the room, slamming into the door. Those fuckers locked it, she thought. She didn't hesitate for a second as she brought back her fist and slammed it into the iron door. It didn't move but a smidge, and so she hit it again, and again. Finally, the bolts broke from their spots and the door shot open, not falling off of its hinges. A musty, sodden smell drifted up the stone stairs that Vi stood atop of. 

    Another scream echoed through the chambers below, this time much louder than before. She could hear shuffling, and the sounds of grunting as she assumed whoever was screaming was being dragged away.

    She cascaded down the steps, now more alert to her senses as the darkness encompassed her being. She wanted to be quiet enough so that they didn't know exactly where she was. They already knew she was here.

    She listened for more sounds, more grunting, more anything. Silence ensued, so she began walking down the dimly lit hallway. She noticed immediately the small iron gated rooms surrounding her. Each had a small sad bed on the floor. Some, there were bones and blood, others were empty. She reached the end of the stretch where another hallway collided with this one, making a T shape. The very last room she peered into before veering down to the left caused her to stop in her tracks.

    There, in the middle of the room, as if left as a sign for her and her alone was her jacket. Her dark red jacket she took from one of the first people she encountered in Zaun after getting out of prison.

     She was here. Vi could hardly hold back the vomit that threatened to rise in her throat, as she scanned the little stone room. From top to bottom, she could sense that she had been kept in here. Various plates were strewn across the room, rotting food sat on a few of the plates and she grimaced at the thought of (y/n) being forced to eat that trash. Gods know what it was.

    Right before she went to continue on her hunt, she heard another blood curdling scream, before a familiar voice yelled-

    "Vi? Vi! Please, anyo-," a grunt sounded from that voice, as if being punched in the stomach to quiet her pleas. White hot rage flooded Vi at the thought of someone touching and hurting her girl. Hers. 

    She zig zagged through a few more halls, before descending a small staircase and bursting through a door that she could hear a ruckus coming out of. The sounds; crying, cursing, and heavy breathing. Vi had to momentarily shield her eyes as brightness flooded her vision. As they adjusted, she took in her surroundings quickly. 

    There, in the middle of the room, bound to a chair and gagged, was a beaten and bloody (y/n). Her eyes widened at the sight of Vi, and she whimpered, pulling lightly at her restraints. Vi started towards her, her only inclination to free her immediately. At her first step, she heard (y/n) yelling through the gag, her eyes widening and her head shaking vigorously. Vi took another step, and (y/n) closed her eyes and screamed into the gag. Only then did Vi realize there was a crony behind her, using her as a meat shield with a knife to her back. 

    "Well, well, well," a familiar voice boomed. Vi didn't flinch as Tahm Kench emerged from a shadowed room to the far right that she hadn't noticed before. "It's a pleasure, as always, Vi."

    "Free her, Kench. Now." Vi ordered. It merely offered a chuckle in response.

    "For a price, child. Everything comes with a price."

     "What do you want?" Vi pleaded. She did not plan to go through with anything, other than to get (y/n) as far away from here as possible.

     "Your girlfriend here told me a lot about you. About your connections to the one they call Jinx?" Panic flooded her momentarily, and she glanced at (y/n) who only sobbed, her head sagged to her chest. She knew (y/n) was strong and must have endured a lot to say anything. "Although, she wouldn't tell us anything else. About your dealings in Piltover. Pity, if she had cooperated, I would have offered her a clean, easy death. But they never do, do they Vi?"

     She shuttered at the thought and burst out of her stance towards kench. She stopped dead in her tracks when 10 other creatures came out of the shadows. Fuck, she thought. She knew Kench could, and would fight too, but she didn't know his moves, what to expect. Thinking for a moment, she knew what she had to do.

    She leaned back her head, and as loud as humanly possible she yelled, "ILLAOI!"

    A quiet tense aura shifted the place, each of the creatures looking back and forth at one another. A minute passed before Vi cursed again, and a few of them laughed. 

    "Illaoi? That is how you found us, huh?" Tahm smirked, a hint of distaste lingering in his tone. "She wouldn't dare come down here and face me, not for the like of you."

     Just as he finished his sentence, Vi felt the heavy presence of Illaoi's spiritual bonds to the Kraken. The air shifted into a heavy, haunting, foreboding feeling. She turned around, just in time to see the massive woman breach the threshold of the room. She glowed slightly, Vi realized then, and her power was emanating through her and rippling through her room. 

    Illaoi did not hesitate as she approached Kench. All of his cronies seemed to cower in her powerful presence. 

    "Release the girl, Kench," She stated plainly. 

    "You do not understand what you are doing, woman," Tahm said, sounding slightly afraid. Even the great demon cowered in her presence. Vi made note not to fuck with Illaoi. 

     "I suppose you are going to do this the hard way," She mocked. She must have been closer than I thought. Suddenly, all around the room, large green spirit like tentacles rose from the floor, flapping mindlessly left and right. Illaoi glanced back at Vi, "Take her, and come help me kill these scum." 

    Vi did not hesitate as roaring combat erupted around her. Her primary focus was (y/n). She stormed over to her, immediately ripping the binds of the gag off of her face. She threw it to the floor and leaned down, making quick work of the bindings around her arms and legs. (y/n) quietly sobbed and looked up through her wet, blood-matted hair at Vi.

--- 🖤🖤🖤---

(Y/N)

    You couldn't stop crying. Not now, not here. Not while Vi knelt in front of you looking entirely panicked and you couldn't move an inch. Every part of your body ached, and you felt weak from blood loss. You didn't flinch, though, as Vi delicately looped one arm under your legs and the other around your back and carried you towards the stairs. She set you down, on the steps, far enough away to keep you safe, but close enough to be able to monitor you. 

   "I've got you, baby. I've got you," She brushed a hand lightly over your bruised face, and you winced from her touch. The color drained from her face, and she looked utterly defeated as she stood. "I have to help Illaoi, don't move." You almost, almost, laughed at that. As if you could move if you wanted to. You were so weak, so frail. 

    Maybe she would teach you how to fight, when this was all over with. You watched her as she turned her back to you, descending the few steps she had gone up. You could see through the doorway the hell that had broken lose. Illaoi had made quick work of the monsters that worked for Kench, the tentacles becoming solid and slamming into them, crushing the majority under their weight. Blood splattered the walls, screeches echoed until all was silent. The only remaining contender was Kench. 

    Before you, Illaoi shot out what appeared to be a tentacle, much smaller than all the others, towards kench. Before it could reach him, a giant hole summoned below the monster, and he jumped into it. You gasped, then grimaced from that pain it caused your body. Suddenly, you heard a wet thud from above you. 

    You didn't dare look behind you, you knew who it was already.

    "You have caused me quite a bit of trouble, child," he said, his stubby arms wrapping around you. You let out a scream, guttural and otherworldly, as you grabbed the knife that was still attached to your thigh. It had gone unnoticed, or more likely, they hadn't bothered to care simply because you were a weak little human. 

    Slashing backwards, pure adrenaline made the pain subside slightly as your blade coursed through the thick skin of Tahms face. He let out a disgusting screech, dropping you. Your body rolled aimlessly down the stairs, and you could feel a snap as your arm landed beneath you. You let out a scream and saw Vi and Illaoi running towards you. Through your tears, and the encroaching darkness that was shrouding your vision, you noticed that Tahm was no longer at the top of the stairs.

    Before you lost consciousness, you saw the woman fall to her knees beside you, carefully adjusting your body and arm. Relentless pain tugged at your sanity.

    "(Y/N), baby, I've got you. I've got you. Let's go home." you heard her voice say faintly. Her tear ridden and bloody face was the last thing you saw before you lost consciousness. 

PART TWELVE- Encouragement

  Your eyes flutter open, and for a moment you are flustered. You do not recognize your surroundings, and you scramble up against the headboard of the large bed you realize you rest upon. Panting, you clutch the covers to your chest, your clean chest. After a moment, you also notice the pain.

    You yell out in pain, and quickly clamp a hand over your mouth.  Before the panic could set in, the door at the furthest left-hand corner of the room swings open. 

    At the threshold, Vi stares at you with wide eyes, panting as if she had sprinted to the room. For a brief moment, you were in shock. Vi let out a soft sigh of relief as she began walking over to you.

    You did not mean to, but you shrank from her. The experiences of the last week were still haunting your very being. She stopped in her tracks.

    "Baby, you're at my house. You're safe now," Vi said in a cool tone. Her hand was put up out in front of her as if to further reassure your safety with her gesture. It didn't take more than a second for tears to begin falling down your cheeks, cascading down your neck and onto your chest under the shirt you wore. 

    As Vi walked to the bed and sat on the edge, she placed a hand on your knee. You did not flinch away from her touch as you did when she was walking toward you. Instead, you let your head fall back against the headboard and let out a pitiful sigh through your sobs.

    "It hurts, Vi," was all you could muster. You hated sounding so pathetic, but the state your body was in was not one to argue. Vi nodded, and reached her hand up to your face, caressing it far more gently than she ever had before. In that moment, the only thing you could think of to say was, "What is your favorite color?"

    She looked slightly taken aback, one eyebrow raised in curiosity. "It's red."

    You smiled slightly.

    "What is your favorite food?"

    "Um... don't make fun of me, but bar food?" she laughed, lowering her head in embarrassment. 

     "Where do you...escape to?" you said lightly, your gaze landing on her own piercing one. You twiddled your thumbs as she looked at you as if studying what she was seeing. She looked away, out the square window that, to your surprise, had sunlight seeping through. 

     "I used to leave for stretches of time after getting out of prison. Usually for odd jobs here and there." She looked back at you before she continued. "There is this place here in Piltover, where the trees surround a small lake close to the border of the undercity." She swallowed. "When I got out, I had... a relationship with an officer of one of the Council leader's daughters. They hated me, thought I was scum of the earth.

    I would leave Cait's house and wander the streets as if I knew where I was going. No matter where I went, people gave me dirty looks. They knew who I was. What I was. But when I found that place where the grass was green and the only noise was birds chirping and leaves rustling in the trees, I knew I had found my safe space.

    That was, of course, until I met you."

     You could feel your chest tightening, your heart aching for the harsh treatment she had received from people that didn't know her just because of where she came from. Where you both came from. 

    "When I met you, it felt like something clicked inside of me. Like a missing puzzle piece had gone into place. Even when I was throwing a fit in that alley way unsure of who you were. When I looked into your eyes in that moment, it felt like we were meant to be there. I was supposed to meet you. Every time thereafter that I saw you and you laughed, I felt that same feeling as I had at the lake. I felt safe."

     Tears that had dried on your face became wet again as new ones began tumbling down your cheeks. "Vi..." you whimpered; your mouth downturned in a far too dramatic that's so sweet type of look. "I feel the same way about you, too." You tried pushing off the headboard but hissed in a breath as a shooting pain traveled through your torso. Your arm, luckily, had been put back into place as you were unconscious. It no longer hurt aside from minor aching.

    Vi stood, and leaned over you so that her shadow covered your famished frame. Bending her neck, she raised her hand and lifted your chin ever so slightly with a single finger. Her lips pressed against yours so gently. It was as if she was ensuring that she would not break you. 

    "I am going to go downstairs and grab you something for the pain. You have two options, a remedy from a medic or booze."

    You let out a slight chuckle, and replied, "I think it would be smart to take a remedy this time."

    After a few minutes of observing the room you were in while she fetched the pain reliever, you came to the conclusion that this was her space. Her familiar (now quite destroyed) red jacket was thrown over the back of a black chair in the corner of the room. You could see spools of white wrapping on a desk that rested in front of a large rounded window, looking over what you presumed to be the city.

    "Here you go," Vi said, startling you slightly as she re-entered the room with food and a small bottle of red liquid. "This does not taste or smell great, please don't smell it like you smelt the shit on the ship." She sat beside you once again, popping open the small vile and handing it over to you. You hesitated, almost smelling it before reaching your other hand up and plugging your nose. Throwing your head back as you drank, you sank it back like a shot of whiskey. "Good girl." was all she said in response. You melted at her praise, feeling heat rise to your cheeks. She snickered, no doubt noticing your reaction.

    "Patience, baby. Once your better I am never letting you leave my room."

    "Promises, promises," was all you said in reply as a sly smile spread across your face.

PART THIRTEEN (FINAL)- Peace

- Spicy -    

It has been a few weeks since your expenditure with Tahm Kench. Vi had not lied for the most part, she had not let you leave her side even once after having rescued you. No matter where you went or what you did, she was with you.

    "(Y/N)," Vi said, lying next to you on her large bed. She lay on her side, resting her head on a hand and twirling absentmindedly fiddling with a piece of your hair with the other. "You feelin' okay today?"

     You nodded in response, turning your head away from your book to peer down at her. "Yeah of course babe, why?"

      "After everything, I just want to make sure you're okay. Like... mentally?" She gazed at you with concern lingering on her face, but as if she was trying to hide it. 

      Contemplating for a moment, you weren't entirely sure. You were certainly glad to be here, but it felt so sudden. Like all of these things had happened so out of the blue. The momentum of your life had been completely overturned, and the experiences of the last few months had certainly changed the way you think about things.

    "Honestly... I don't know. I am not scared, but I am not at peace. Do you know what I mean?" You looked at Vi as you talked with your hands. She nodded knowingly in response. "I am just glad I am out of that place, and we don't have anything to worry about. Plus, I feel a lot better physically which definitely helps."

    "Good. Do you want to go to that place I told you about? By the lake?" 

     You recalled the place that Vi had told you about being her hide-away location. Her peace. 

    "I would love that." You replied with a smile.

--- 🖤🖤🖤 ---

     Vi had given you a light sweater to wear, as spring had just arrived and although it was warmer than during the winter the wind was still crisp as it ran across your skin. 

    Walking through the streets of Piltover, you didn't care to look back at the gawkers and whisperers. You held Vi's hand in yours and felt like the most powerful woman in the world standing next to her. She did not look anywhere aside from ahead, and occasionally over at you to give a faint smile. 

    Approaching the end of a neighborhood road, the sidewalk curved around with a tall fence guarding from what lay beyond- the forest. You looked over at Vi and raised a brow.

    "Am I supposed to climb that?"

    She laughed, "My love, there are some obstacles you must overcome before you get to where you want to be."

    Although she was right, you still let out a prominent sigh and rolled your eyes to the heavens. She laughed again, bright and vibrant sounds radiating through your skin and bones. You approached the fence, using your fingers and boots to push you up, up, up and over the top. You took a moment at the top, looking over the small road you had come from. No one was watching, and you were thankful that no one was going to see you struggle with such a simple physical activity.

     "You ever going to come down?" Vi urged, shocking you from your revery. 

     "If I fall, will you catch me?" You said in response, nervous flutters racing through your chest. It was ridiculous, as it was only a few feet off of the ground. It felt like a hundred.

     "Always." She responded, looking you dead in the eyes. You sighed again, slowly turning your body and descending the opposing side of the fence. Once you nearly reached the bottom, you jumped off the last ten inches and turned to face Vi.

    "You have got to help me get into shape, honestly," You smiled, huffing out breaths. 

     After a tad bit of banter, the two of you continued walking. A thick line of trees sat ahead of you, a sweet whisper of pine lingering in the air. Vi released your hand and began walking forward, beckoning you to follow. You stepped in line behind her as she pushed branches aside and followed a path only known to her.

     "Here it is," Vi said, holding back another branch and stepping back as if revealing the area to you. You stepped forward, gawking at your surroundings as Vi stepped up behind you. 

     "Oh my Gods, its..." You started. You couldn't even find the words. A small meadow filled with Lavender, Honeysuckle, Tulips, and various other flowers rest in front of you. The breeze made gorgeous floral scents waft over to you, instantly relaxing your mind and muscles. A few feet ahead, you could see a round pond littered with lily pads. Across from the pond, the trees finished the circle encompassing the area. It really was a secluded paradise.

    "I know, right?" Vi smiled, looking longingly at what lay ahead. She grabbed your hand gently and pulled you with her as she began walking. "Over here there is a perfect place to lay down and look at the stars at night, if you want to stay long enough to do that."

    You nodded sheepishly, feeling honored to be taken to her sacred place. As you reached the flat plane of grass that looked almost manicured compared to the rest of the space, she sat down. Gently she tugged your hand to follow suit.

   Sitting in silence, you rested your head on her shoulder and looked across the water. It was crazy that all of these things had happened in the span of a few months. Meeting Vi, meeting her sister Jinx, getting kidnapped and tortured... All to lead to this place, next to this woman, who you could not deny you were falling undeniably in love with.

   "What are you thinking about, sweet stuff?" Vi murmurs, looking over at you with her head tilted as she lifts your chin with a finger. Your gaze meets hers and you take in her beauty. The small scar that sits on her pink lips, the jewelry in her nose. Her hardened eyes softening only for you. 

    "I think..." You start, pausing to suck in a shaky breath, "I think I'm in love with you, Vi."

     She looks taken aback, her eyebrows raising, and she blinks a few times. You feel heat rise to your cheeks before she smiles sweetly at you. Relief floods you when she responds.

     "I think, sweet stuff, that I may just love you, too." Her hand moves to your cheek, cupping your face. You lean into it, closing your eyes for a moment and inhaling deeply. When you open them, you meet her gaze. Her eyes have heated, lids lowering. As she gazes and you through her lashes, she runs her teeth over her bottom lip. "You know... I think you feel better enough that we can consummate our love... the good ol' fashioned way." She sniggers, raising a brow and tilting her head the other way. 

     "I suppose there is," You reply, trying to sound sultry even though you have no idea what you're doing.

    She giggles at your attempt, leaning in close. Your foreheads touch, and for a moment the two of you just sit there basking in each other's presence. You can feel her eyes on your lips, and instinctively you lick them. She lets out a small growl, moving her hand to the base of your neck and pulling you in. Her lips brush yours slightly, and a sigh escapes you. As your lips part, she enters you with her tongue. The two of you kissing passionately, she slowly lays you backward on the grass you sat upon. 

    Vi wants to cater to you, to love you. She wants you to feel special, but you can tell that there is something else urging her to go faster. She is ravenous to taste you, it seems, as she quickly trails down your body and pulls the pants down that you are wearing. You nearly reach down to cover yourself, but she snaps her gaze up to your own with an intensity so fierce you can't help but feel obliged to let her move forward. 

    Leaning your head back on the grass, your breathing intensifies as you feel her breath brush against your bare skin. The feeling of being out in the open, in the wild, is exhilarating. You had never experienced anything like this, and you are more than happy to be doing it with her. 

    Deep in thought, you intake a sharp breath of air as you feel her flat tongue lick you from your opening up to your clit. The world slows, but she speeds up. Your eyes roll back into your head as you reach out a hand a clasp her hair. She lets out a satisfied groan.

    "Fuck, baby. You look so fucking hot when I am pleasing you," Vi says quickly, returning to what she was doing. You feel one of her hands travel down your side, past your thigh and to your center. She pauses briefly as she adjusts herself and inserts a finger into you. Vi curves it up, flicking that spot perfectly, making little breathy moans escape your lips as she continues licking and worshipping your clit. 

    "Vi... Vi I'm gonna...", you start to say, and she looks up at you, breathing against your pussy only to pause for a moment.

     "Look at me while you cum, Princess," She urges, returning to that spot. You look down at her, and as she consumes you, you see her eyes meet your own, and you explode into a million pieces. You can't help it, falling back and bucking your hips against her face. She doesn't stop savoring the moment, until you use the hand that was once clenched in her hair to gently stop her.

    She smiles, a feline smile as she retreats from your throbbing pussy. You're panting heavily, and she crawls up your body. You think she is going to kiss you, but she brings the hand that she was fingerbanging you with to your mouth. You reach out your tongue and suck your juices off of her finger, and watch as she inhales and closes her eyes. 

    Using all of the strength you can muster, you grab her wrist and pull her to the side. As she falls over, you giggle maniacally and crawl on top of her. She laughs out loud as if shocked you got the upper hand for even just a moment. 

     "Now, Vi, let me return the favor? This love... it isn't one sided." Before she can open her mouth to protest, you lean down and kiss her long and hard, letting your right-hand trail down her neck, her breasts, until it brushes over a nipple. She gasps, and you can't help but marvel in the fact that she is sitting here beneath you. Vi looks so stunning, a blush creeping into her cheeks. Her blue eyes are hooded, never leaving your own.

     You lean down, unzipping her jacket as you go. You let it fall to the sides of her torso, and slowly caress her bare stomach underneath her white tank top. You pull it up and up until her chest is exposed to you. You had often wondered what she would look like here, as you hadn't gotten the opportunity to see yet. But she was perfect. Her breasts were not big but not small, cute little pink buds were hard as the breeze and most certainly her arousal enticed them. You bit your lip, before leaning down and taking one into your mouth. Swirling around it, sucking, and releasing it with a pop. You turned your attention to the other and did the same thing. 

    After you were satisfied that she was feeling positively enchanted, you trailed soft kisses down her stomach, stopping at the hem of her pants. You hooked a finger in one of the belt loops and looked up at her expectant gaze. In this moment, you recalled the first time she did this to you.

    "Is this okay?" You smiled, and she smiled back. She must have also remembered what she said to you that night on the ship.

     "More than okay, Sweet stuff," she said, no louder than a whisper. 

    You took no time in removing her bottoms, her panties, and marveling at her beautiful pussy. She was so wet, glistening. The thought that you were what caused her intense arousal made you proud. You had no mercy in your fucking her. The love flowed through you and your tongue against her clit until she was crying out your name. You had never heard her sound like that before, so sensual, so free.

    After you were finished, you both got your clothes back on. Vi rested her head on an arm as her back pressed against the grass, and you climbed up and onto her chest. Mainly, the two of you were looking at the stars.

    "I guess we get to look at the stars, after all," She smiled, and you glanced at her in awe.

    "If it's with you, I will do anything." You shifted onto your stomach, resting your chin on her chest so your face was directed at her. "Because after everything we have been through, I have come to realize that you're my escape, too. You're my home."

     Vi stretched down, tears threatening to leak from her eyes. You rose up slightly, to accommodate the space between the two of you and shared a pleasant, soft and loving kiss.

    You realized, in that moment under the stars, that there was nothing you would ever change about the past. And that the future, no matter what it could bring, would always be better than it could of been before if you were with her.

    Your home. 

------  🖤🖤🖤 ------      THE END      ------ 🖤🖤🖤 ------

[averagejoesolomon]

We made it, friends. Welcome to the final installment of Full Circle: 1986. It has been an absolute delight sharing this one with you. It is a downright gift to finally be able to commit this all to paper, after having been in my head for probably close to a decade now. This will probably be the last Full Circle chapter until ~November/December. I know this is longer than usual, but I've finally finished an original manuscript, and I'm going to take an honest shot at publishing it this fall. I so appreciate your patience while I follow that dream. I'll be back as soon as I can with more of Full Circle. There may be some surprises in the meantime (ahem—Listen Series 10-year anniversary), but as always, I can't wait to share what comes next. Those of you doing some math may have already realized we have a very familiar face coming in 1988 👀🍼 Until then, please enjoy. If you're new here, you can read all of Full Circle on Ao3.

Chapter Fourteen

“You’ve got to be goddamn kidding me.”

Joe Solomon can find a way to hide in just about every environment on earth. Anywhere he goes, he’s the figure at the back of the bar, the shadow at the end of the street, the ghost sitting in a blind spot security swears they don’t have. His face is never caught on camera. His name is never on any lists. If there’s darkness around, you can bet Joe’s managed to sink into it. Maybe it’s his New York roots, or old foster kid habits, or Blackthorne training he can’t quite shake, but one thing’s for sure—if Joe don’t want to be found, there’s not a soul on earth who can find him.

But something about the gray-speckled walls of Langley’s third floor draws him out, as though this place was designed to expose all the secrets it collects, starting with men like him. Of course, the hollering doesn’t help either. “Look at yourself.”

Matt turns just in time to see Joe barrel scowl-first down the hall. “Joe,” Matt says, smile wide and welcoming. “Nice to see you up and walking again.”

“Don’t start,” he barks. “You made me stay home, meanwhile you looked like this?”

Joe’s still got a slight limp to his gait, but that’s not much compared to the laundry list of fresh injuries Matt’s working with. He’s officially lost all leverage in this argument. “To be fair,” he says, trying his luck anyway, “I’ve only looked like this for the last 48 hours.”

Joe closes the distance between them, but his voice still stays at that same outraged level. “What the hell happened to you?”

This particular question can’t be answered in the lobby of Director Smith’s main office, which is almost certainly monitored by folks outside of their extremely limited task force—if not bugged by less friendly players. With one look, Matt’s able to tap into their shared shorthand and convey caution. “Details later.”

Joe catches the hint, even if he doesn’t look happy about it. He scans Matt up and down in that even, no-nonsense sort of way Joe scans everything. His voice drops to Matt’s level when he grumbles, “You just get to have all the fun, I guess.”

“If it helps,” Matt says, “I don’t remember most of it.”

“Jesus,” Joe sympathizes. “Would you at least sit down, already? It hurts just looking at you.”

The two of them usually share the same stick-straight posture, a habit leftover from their Army days that proves impossible to break. Joe’s wearing it now, softened over the years, but still there. The subtle draw of his shoulders. The top-to-bottom stacking of his spine. When Matt tries to mimic it, he comes up against the strain in his ribs and curls right back up. He hasn’t been able to pull himself upright since his third helicopter across the Alps, and Joe’s presence ain’t gonna change that, even if Joe’s always made him feel just a little bit invincible. “If I sit down,” says Matt, “I’m not gonna be able to stand back up.”

Joe’s jaw grinds. “I told you I’d get on a flight—”

Matt says, nice and easy, “And I told you I had it handled.”

“You’re never going solo on one of these things again.”

“I didn’t go solo. I had Rachel, and Rachel had a whole team.”

This ain’t much of a comfort in Joe’s book, and it shows. This is the same look Joe gives him anytime Rachel gets mentioned—and as it so happens, it’s also the same look Rachel gives him anytime Joe gets mentioned. Matt’s got no clue how the two most observant people he knows can be this blind to their own similarities. 

No doubt Joe’s got plenty to say when it comes to Rachel Cameron and her team, but he bites his tongue because good guys don’t bad-talk ladies when they’re not around to defend themselves. Instead, he keeps his frustrations broad. “It never should’ve gotten this close.”

“We’ve made some powerful enemies,” Matt says with a shrug. The movement aches, but no more than sitting, or standing, or breathing already does. “They were bound to get a couple hits on us one of these days.”

Joe gives him another surveying glance. “This is more than a couple.”

“It’s worse than it looks.”

“And they didn’t get hits on us. They got hits on you.”

Of all his hiding spots, Joe’s favorite is his own guilt. He retreats into it every chance he gets. Lingers in its shadow, sometimes for days at a time. Guilt is the thing that keeps Joe up at night and when he does finally fall asleep, guilt is the thing that brings him back to his feet, wandering down empty hotel halls well into the witching hour. Joe keeps a running list of sins in his head at all times, some small part of him always repenting for the orders he’s followed, the lies he’s told, the lives he’s taken, and a moment of weakness one Christmas Eve night when his own secrets finally became too heavy to hold all on his own. 

It’s constant, and Joe’s an old pro at finding new things to take the blame for. He’s doing it right now. Guilt that he wasn’t there to take his own beating. Guilt that Matt was.

This is all a load of hooey, according to Matt. A bunch of shame and remorse put there by the Circle of Cavan, because shame and remorse is exactly what turns Circle recruits into Circle agents. He’s said as much to Joe, but it’s never received well—doesn’t seem to help, anyway, so Matt focuses on something that will. “It’s worse than it looks,” he says again, and he meets Joe’s eyes this time. Lets the words settle how they need to for Joe to really believe it.  “Honest.”

Joe squints, assessing Matt with that sharp and attentive look he has. “Chrissake,” he finally sighs. “You lie to Soviet dignitaries with that mouth? Honestly Morgan, you’ve got a godawful tell.”

“Alright, so I’m gonna head down to the docs when we’re done here,” Matt admits. “But Joe, look at me. I’m fine. And if I’m not fine, then I’ll be fine.” Joe looks like he wants to protest and takes in a breath to do exactly that. But Matt’s in no shape for a fight right now, so he interrupts this one before it can even start. “Did you get to my safety deposit box while I was gone?”

This is a lot like asking if Joe got around to sleeping or eating while he was gone, which might be why Joe rolls his eyes. “You asked me to go,” he says, “so I went.”

“And?” Matt prompts.

Joe spots the change in subject, but Matt must look pitiful enough to let it slide. “Nothing,” he says. “No sign of a break-in—passport right where it was supposed to be.”

Matt’s heart drops into his battered gut, landing among the dread that’s been churning there for days. It takes every ounce of training he’s got to keep his face neutral, composed, when he lets out a matter-of-fact, “Huh.”

“Huh?” Joe presses. “What, huh?”

“One of my passports was in Moscow. Saw it with my own two eyes.” 

The lobby is empty around them, lined with unoccupied seats and filled with unread magazines. There’s no one to hide from. There’s not a sound to be heard. Not even the plant in the corner is alive, faded plastic leaves feeding off the fluorescents above. Even so, neither one of them risks a scene for fear that someone, somewhere is watching.

Joe’s words are quiet. Barely there. “If it wasn’t from your deposit box…”

“Someone at Langley is selling the passports they have on file,” Matt says. “And if we track them down…”

They don’t dare finish the thought aloud. They don’t have to. This has always been the endgame. The sole objective Director Smith gave them years ago, back when Joe still had an allegiance to the Circle and Matt didn’t know the name Ioseph Cavan. Find the moles, protect the agency, and save Joe’s reputation in the process. All these years, they’ve been tracking Circle agents from the outside in, working with any informant they could to get back to a source at Langley. This may be their one and only shot at an internal investigation.

But Matt’s ribs twinge against his breath, and the timing reeks of a trap. After all these years of looking, they finally reach a breakthrough on this op days after he takes a beating designed to intimidate. Maybe it’s working, because Matt’s not so sure they should follow this one.  “Conversation for another time,” he hints. “We’ll talk when we get back to the apartment.”

And Joe doesn’t miss a trick. “There’s more?”

When it comes to the Circle, there’s always more. No one knows that better than Joe Solomon. “There’s no such thing as coincidence, right?” 

Joe nods. “Right.”

���Let’s just say,” Matt cautions, “I don’t think it’s a coincidence I was there.”

Matt keeps this theory vague on purpose, trusting Joe to decode the rest.  There’s a glint in his eyes as he runs the numbers and plays out every hypothetical. Joe may not have been in Moscow, but that doesn’t mean he can’t piece together what happened. “Jesus,” he spits, realization playing out in his features. “You think Rachel set you up?”

Well. That sure ain’t the conclusion Matt expected him to make. “What? No. God, no,” Matt sputters. They don’t have time to walk back the math on this particular miscalculation, so Matt cuts to the chase before Joe can go any further down that path. “But Joe, listen. I think Catherine might have.”

This has Joe running a whole new set of numbers through his head, pulling the corners of his mouth into a hard, stoic frown. “No,” he says, definite. “Not a chance. You’re sure it wasn’t Rachel—?”

“Morning, Joe.”

With timing too perfect to be accidental, Rachel chooses this moment to round the corner and join their conversation. She has a cup of vending machine coffee in each hand, steam still rising from the slim notches in each plastic cap. As she sips from one, she holds the other out to Matt, and he’s been awake for too many consecutive hours to decline. It ain’t Joe’s coffee, but it’ll do.

“Glad to see you’re feeling better,” she says, and Matt has to hand it to her—she’s got this way of making something perfectly pleasant sound like utter devastation. “I heard you’ve been indisposed as of late.”

Joe’s answering glance is aimed directly at Matt, a scathing pout from someone who ain't above using his highly specialized skill set on a girl, just as long as his best friend gives him permission first.

Matt replies with his own warning look and a placating, “Play nice.” To keep the game fair, he turns to Rachel too. “Both of you.”

“What the hell is she doing here?” Joe asks.

Matt throws a thumb in her direction. “Talk to Rachel, when you’re talking to Rachel.”

“Alright.” His eyes flash to her. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Rachel takes another sip of her coffee, entirely unruffled. “A pleasure, as always, Joe.”

Joe crosses his arms over his chest. Settles into a wider stance. “You’ll have to excuse me if I’m not at my friendliest,” he says. “It’s just that I gave Matt to you in pretty good shape, and you didn’t exactly return him in pristine condition.”

“All things considered, I’d say he’s in pretty excellent condition, actually.” She’s the cool and collected counter to Joe’s stinging emotion. “Despite your best efforts to put him in the ground.”

Joe huffs, a bull seeing red. “Excuse me?”

Matt physically steps between the two of them. “Alright,” he says. “A little civility, please. I’ll remind you both that there are plenty of things I need your help with, but getting myself into trouble ain’t one of them. If you wanna be mad at someone, you can be mad at me.”

They both look ready to follow through on that offer, so Matt holds out his hands in either direction. Before they can speak he says, “But you can’t be mad at me yet—I’m injured, remember? So, so very injured.”

Joe rolls his eyes and spits out a, “Chrissake,” at the same time Rachel says, “Oh honestly, Matthew.” The two of them seem to find some tentative common ground in their shared annoyance, temporarily refraining from any further bickering. That’s fine. Matt can be a common enemy for now. Maybe it’ll remind them that what they’ve actually got is a common friend. There may be hope for them yet.

He lowers his hands slowly, trying not to disturb the peace. “Rachel’s here on orders from the Director,” he explains, “on account of how she’s recently learned some new information.”

Joe deciphers this in a matter of seconds. “You told her?”

“What I could,” Matt confirms. “It was the only way to get her out of Moscow.”

For all his grumbling, Joe knows the same thing every spy knows—that Moscow is a desperate place in a desperate time, always calling for desperate measures. He won’t begrudge any decisions made within the city’s borders, because he knows firsthand how Moscow can wring a fella out and force him to find alliances in the damnedest places. 

So rather than holler any more than he already has, he turns to Rachel. Looks at her with a deadly serious intensity. “Then he must have told you that you’ve raised some flags?”

Rachel matches his gaze. “He did.”

“That these are dangerous people?”

“He said that too.”

Joe glaces at Matt, then lands back on Rachel one more time. He looks like he wants to hide, but instead he holds strong. “He told you that if you keep looking for them, they’re going to find you first?”

Guilt for pulling Matt into all this. Guilt for pulling in Rachel by proxy.

Rachel’s chin is in its usual place, high and strong. “I’m not afraid of making a few more enemies.”

“I’m not saying it to scare you,” Joe insists. “I’m saying it because it’s the truth, and because you’re smart enough to walk away while you still can.”

Joe Solomon can hide anywhere in the world, but there are some people not even he can hide from, even if he’s spent most of his adult life trying to do exactly that. His words lack all the signs of their usual squabbles, replaced by a man who has been running for as long as he can remember, and wouldn’t wish it on his worst enemy.

Rachel Cameron is not his worst enemy, but she knows their rivalry well enough to understand this must be important, if Joe’s decided to put it aside for now. She surrenders her own fight, just temporarily, and grants him a nod. “I’ll do what the agency asks of me,” she says. Then, with some consideration.  “What’s best for Matt. And I suppose, by association, that means I’ll do what’s best for you, too.”

Sometimes Matt forgets that Joe is older than Rachel, by just under two years. In damn near every aspect of espionage and beyond, the two are evenly matched. But right then, Joe’s experience weighs down his every feature and makes him look horribly, achingly old. When it comes to understanding the toll the Circle can take on a person’s soul, few people know more than Joe.

“Do whatever you want,” he says, letting his head fall into a shameful shake. “But just know, as soon as you walk in those doors, you aren’t making decisions for yourself. You’re making them for Abby and your dad. For any friends you have back in Baltimore. For any future family you might want to have someday. Because once these people find out you’re onto them, they won't just stop at you.”

The best way to send Rachel into an uneasy spiral is to dig up her sense of helplessness. It’s something Matt’s only just started to learn, but something Joe seems to have known for a while now, given how easily he leverages her own fears against her. There’s some irony to the idea that a manipulation technique Joe learned in the Circle is the only thing keeping Rachel out of it.

She glances at Matt, but it’s quick. Like she can’t quite help herself. It’s gone before Matt can decide what it means, hidden behind another sip of coffee. “Fine,” she says, bored as she wipes the corner of her lip with her thumb. “Anything else?”

Joe starts to answer one way or the other, but he doesn’t get the chance. They’re interrupted by a petite woman in a pencil skirt, emerging from the office at their backs. She peers over horn-rimmed glasses as she says, “The Director will see you now.”

Best not to keep the boss waiting.

Rachel straightens her shoulders and starts to turn, leading the pack. “Ladies first,” she reminds them both, looking distinctly Abby-like as she shoots a carefree smile over her shoulder.

Matt starts to follow, the way he always follows her lead, but Joe hooks a hand around his arm instead, keeping Matt planted in place. He waits until Rachel is out of earshot and then, in the most covert voice Matt’s ever heard from him, asks, “Are you sleeping with Rachel Cameron?”

Spy training or not, Matt feels a flush crawl up his neck, as fresh flashes catch along his breath. Rachel’s cool hand on his hot chest. Rachel’s moan in his mouth. “Am I—?” he sputters. “Am I sleeping with—?”

But Joe’s just got this look on his face. Cover blown. 

So Matt drops the act. They’ve talked about matters of national security with less urgency when he asks, “How did you know?”

Joe points to the coffee cup in Matt’s hand. “You hate vending machine coffee,” he says. “Which I know, because every time you drink it, you bitch and moan about how my coffee is better.”

“Your coffee is better,” Matt contests.

“And yet, you’re drinking hers,” Joe says. “And the only way you’d ever drink that shit is if you were—”

“Yeah.”

“So you are.”

“Yeah.”

“About time.”

This is so wildly off-base from the response Matt expects that he has to do a double-take. Make sure he heard right. “Wait,” he says. “What’s that supposed to—?”

“Are you boys coming, or what?”

Rachel pops her head around the doorway and Matt resists the completely unspylike urge to throw both hands over Joe’s mouth. “Yep,” he says. “Be right there.”

She retreats back to the office, and Matt turns back toward Joe. “Not a word.”

Joe holds up both hands in faux innocence. “My lips are sealed,” he says, but he’s biting back a grin, and Matt knows he hasn’t heard the last of this. “Now let’s get this over with. The sooner we get out of here, the sooner we can watch the Royals game.”

Matt really is having a hard time deciding how to feel about Joe, right this moment. “You taped the Royals game for me?”

Joe shrugs. “‘Course I taped the Royals game for you.”

But Matt forgives easy, and Joe’s easy to forgive anyway. “Joe Solomon,” he says, with a grin of his own. “Did you miss me?”

“Alright,” Joe drones. “Get in there, or I’m gonna tell you the scores.”

Matt does as he’s told, because it’s Joe telling him to do it. Plus, the woman with the glasses is tapping her heel in their direction. Even though Matt regularly squares up against arms dealers and armed guards, he's still not willing to tick off the Langley secretaries.

They file into the familiar beige and black office, ready to give their usual debrief and sort out which details should be committed to paper and which should be left to rot in the wind. This process is routine enough that it’s practically scripted, and Matt feels a certain sense of comfort in the repetition, even with Rachel’s presence. In fact, some part of him is relieved for her to finally see all this. To finally understand a part of his life that’s been kept from her for so long.

But the moment he enters the room, he realizes that Rachel ain’t the office’s only new addition.

Director Smith is tucked behind his desk, just like always, shuffling through a stack of paper that never seems to get any smaller, no matter how many times they visit. Like always, his black jacket hangs on the back of his chair and his tie is loose at the collar. He’s filled out the mustache he started growing a few years back, in an attempt to look more like Tom Selleck. He looks mostly the same as he always has, except where age and stress make him look a little more weary.

The man across from him is unfamiliar—at least, Matt thinks he is. But a second glance triggers some deep down certainty that they’ve met before, somewhere, sometime, when Matt was least expecting him. 

The Director looks up at them all. Smiles. “Ah, welcome home, boys,” he says, in his easy Virginian accent. “And Ms. Cameron. I’ve heard wonderful things.”

“Likewise, sir,” Rachel replies, always the perfect lady.

“How is your sister?” he wonders. “Bored to tears, I suppose.”

“And healing up just fine,” she says. “Which, I keep reminding her, is the important part.”

“Yes, well, as soon as she’s ready to go again, we’ll be happy to have her,” he says. “Send my best to her—and to your father, while you’re at it.”

“Will do, sir.”

The mystery man turns to face them head-on, and Matt gets that feeling again. It’s the eyes that strike him first, dark in a way that makes them look endless. Something about the cut of his jaw, the angle of his nose, the furrow of his brow. It all sends a surge of hot familiarity through Matt’s veins, landing like metal in his mouth.

“I’m eager to hear about your latest findings,” Smith goes on. “But first, I suppose you’ve all noticed we’re not alone.”

It’s the start of an introduction and the mystery man stands to meet it, buttoning the front of his jacket as he goes. His movements strike more familiarity into Matt, resonating at a single frequency in his bones.

“Trusting that you’re all able to keep a secret until the news is made official,” says Smith, with some humor, “I’d like to introduce you to the new Director of Operations for the CIA—Mr. Max Edwards.”

Max Edwards’ dark eyes settle onto Matt, holding a hand out to shake. Matt takes it with a flinch, hand still sore from fighting off memories he can’t remember. “Nice to meet you,” says Max, in low southern drawl just barely above a whisper. “Alexander has told me great things about this task force.”

Max moves on to the next hand, and it’s Joe who has the wherewithal to ask, “New, sir?”

Director Smith stands to join the rest of the room, rounding his desk and leaning against its front. “I’ve been called up the ranks, Mr. Solomon,” he says, arms crossing casually across his chest. “Come autumn, I will be serving as the Deputy Director of the CIA.”

“Congratulations,” says Rachel, sincerely.

“That’s great,” Matt mutters, distracted.

Leave it to Joe to ask, “What does that mean for—?”

Director Smith holds up a hand, already well ahead of Joe and not afraid to show it. “We will, of course, have some details to work out. Rest assured we will have time to do so, though I’d prefer not to speak in great detail with Ms. Cameron present.” He turns to Rachel. “No offense intended.”

“None taken,” Rachel replies. Her gaze meets Joe’s, one final debate between the two of them. She must let him win, because she turns back to Smith and says, “As I understand it, my involvement is better left at need-to-know.”

Matt should be relieved. He should be thankful that something Joe said got through to her. That she isn't pushing for more. That she won’t be the Circle’s next target, and that she won’t have to spend a lifetime in this fight. But he’s just too caught up in the way Max walks. In the way he speaks, and moves, and looks.

Smith nods in her direction. “Unfortunately, I believe that’s a wise decision,” he says. “While your skills would be more than welcome, I’m certain I don’t have to share that the consequences could be quite dire.”

“No sir,” Rachel agrees. “That’s been made clear.”

“Then we will save our discussion for another time,” he concludes.  “Until then, the only thing you three need to know is that I will no longer serve as your primary contact on this case. I simply won’t have the time. But I do still hope to stay involved, which is why I wanted to ensure I had someone I trusted in this position.”

All three of them turn to study Max, the man to be trusted. He stands tall. Confident. Certain that he is exactly where he is supposed to be.

“Mr. Edwards will train at my side in the coming months, learning the ins-and-outs of our objectives here,” says Director Smith. “Boys, you’ll be asked to pursue new leads as they come in—no different than before. Ms. Cameron, we’ll work closely with you on your upcoming reports to ensure we commit the correct details to paper. This is among my top priorities as I transition, and Max has expressed similar dedication.”

This all feels so critical and immediate. Matt wishes he could focus, but his brain is caught on repeat, trying to fill the Max Edwards sized hole in his head.

Max clears his throat. “Everything alright, son?” he asks Matt. “You look shaken.”

The set of his shoulders. The crease in his forehead. “I’m sorry sir, it’s just—” he starts, but he hesitates, worried he’ll sound foolish. The whole room watches him, waiting for an answer he ain’t sure about. “I can’t shake the feeling we’ve met before.”

A small sigh rises and falls in Max’s broad chest, something close to a laugh, although Matt can’t imagine this man ever laughing. Max glances toward Director Smith, who grants a permissive node, and Max holds his hands out, putting himself on full display. “You caught me,” he says, simply.  “You have seen me before. At the Bolshoi Theatre.”

With the Bolshoi as a background, Matt’s brain handily fills in the rest of the memory. A bag of passports in his hands, Townsend’s voice at his back, and a mysterious man looking up at him from the ground floor. That must be it. “You spotted us,” Matt remembers. “In the balcony. Before we ran.”

To Matt’s credit, Max didn’t look at all like himself in Moscow, done up in a disguise that relied on dark facial hair and heavy Russian garb. That must be why Matt couldn’t identify him on sight. “You were not too hard to spot, I’m afraid.”

This sounds like it could be a joke, but Matt’s not sure, so he replies in earnest, just in case. “Yes, well,” he says. “Moscow has a way of bringing out unexpected circumstances.”

“I’d like to hear more, when we have time,” says Max. “Learn how we can do better in the future.”

“Yessir.”

When Max Edwards smiles, a chill runs down Matt’s spine, and it must be left over from Moscow. From that feeling of having eyes on his back, and not trusting a single step he takes. It always takes a few days to shake off the Soviet Union and this is no exception. 

Matt meets Max’s eyes once more, and he's got this strange urge to hide. Slip into a crowd, the way he always does. Let the world dissolve at his back, then come up for air once its safe again.

But Max already found him once, back on a balcony in the the Bolshoi. Who's to say it couldn't happen again? Matt may be a natural Pavement Artist, but Max seems like the type who can see straight through anything. “Gentlemen,” Max says, clasping his hands together. “I think this is the start of a beautiful partnership.”

[phosphorus-noodles]

4 and 17!

4 - How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?

Ohh I was just thinking about this yesterday... I think four? My current wip + three other ones, all for the same series :3

17 - Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order?

It's pretty close to start to finish tbh ashdjfs- I worry about having a "consistent tone" a lot so anytime I go to write I first scan through everything I have already and do a little editing before I start writing. Every single time. So by the time I finish the last bit I've probably redone the first bit like six times lol. But I do sometimes do a few paragraphs out of order, or I'll have an idea for a later scene and will make a bullet point further down on my outline/draft, but I won't fully write it until later on when I get to it ^^

(Send me writing asks!)

[shoko-komi]

Weekly Komi Report - 19/07/23

I rise and I LIVE and my stomach... hurts (but in a good way)

Komi Can't Communicate can be read in the following places:

Viz Media (only in North America) or Mangakakalot for the official translation.

Mangadex for scanlations (shoutout to Mylene Scans who recently picked up the series)!

So... I've really got to stick just to key moments jasndjas. The last report, I was a hair's breadth away from sharing the entire chapter with the only comments being "ajsndjsasdajksdn" and "AAAAAA".

I will continue to do this probably.

Picking up right where we left off at the end of the last chapter!!! I praised Oda for his choice to have their kiss be an intimate and private moment away from us the audience, but oh ho ho! Having our cake and eating it, too.

Commence with the anxiety meltdown! They are so alike asjdajosd

my man is having an out of body experience.

That looks like a thought, but I want to imagine he's screaming this aloud. Full lung blasting that proclamation into the rain and disturbing the nearby houses. This above is the Viz translation, but Mylene Scans has him saying "love"

Both are good imo

I'll skip their conversation about whether that was their first kiss or their second. It's really good but... I'm trying not to share the entire chapter asjdnaksjldnjka

Huh?

WUH???

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

SHE KINDA LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!!!

Tomohito Oda never misses. Except for when he does. But when he doesn't, he doesn't. And he usually doesn't. This time, he didn't. My brain is overtaxed.

See you next week!

[thekaijudude]

Have you been enjoying Arc so far or there is really nothing new?

I haven't been watching cause it feels the same thing as every new gen Especially when it comes to bring back GUBILA again.

Also Arc desing kind sucks Especially his head cause why would have a Silver body Ultra have Fucking UltraSeven type Ultra Eyes? It worked for Taiga cause his mom should be a Silver Ultra but Arc really doesn't have excuse for that.

The only thing I am hyper for is the return of Jack or Gaia since there only one guess star left

Oh I've covered my views on Arc and my views on his design extensively since we knew of the synopsis before it aired, so I'll be summarising most of the stuff here

For my thoughts on the design, in summary, he still looks ugly from the front, but absolutely RAD from the side. And he was design specifically to have a Reiwa-looking head sculpt with a Showa-looking body. It's to be expected anyways since we seem to have at least 1 series that's a homage to the Showa Era every decade so at least we got this out of the way with Arc already until at least 2030 (unless they wanna have another successor series to a showa era ultra before that)

As for series, overall as said, it's mid, even more mid than Decker was which I also explained why. Personally it's due to my personal preference of preferring series that is focused on an overall plot (which is why I really did not enjoy Blazar at all, but I digress). And Arc is obviously mainly just filler content for the first half.

To put it into perspective, before ep 14, the last time we got an update on wtf was going on with the Ooze parasites, was that it was a flashback way back in ep 6.

But as pointed out in the latest issue of the uuchsen magazine that I shared, the 2nd half of Arc will be vastly different from the first half, as shown in ep 14 and 15 where we are now back on track to the main plot (at least after the Blazar arc).

Not to mention we are finally getting essentially a 2-epsiode crossover with Blazar (technically it's 4, starting from ep 16 which I'll explain when the scans drop). I haven't posted this information yet because I'm waiting for the October Scans to drop to ill just share this first.

So imo Arc is finally getting at least somewhat interesting from here on out. Tbh I'm not really disappointed as detailed that I don't really have expectations for this series (like Decker back then) when we first found out the whole armor gimmick

But if there's a silver lining to all this, it'll probably be that TsuPro is moving on from the Blazar-Arc formula since these 2 have seen really bad drops in the Bandai sales which Bandai and FIELDS are making alot of noise about it even back then for Blazar as I pointed out in the latest financial report I shared. Tsujimoto, in his interview, even emphasised that TsuPro will be moving on from Blazar-Arc's focus on kaiju, back to the Ultras themselves, even referencing the pressure from Bandai as well. So we will finally return to getting ACTUAL FORMS and focus on the main plot for subsequent series hopefully.

(I have come across a quarterly financial report of Arc, which is still showing a decline in sales but I haven't shared it yet cause I can't confirm it's authenticity since it didn't come from 809 so stay tuned when it eventually drops)

Also, at least Arc has made advancements in terms of pushing the quality of shows forward in some ways. I did point out in every episode commentaries of certain new filming techniques and fight sequences that Arc has improved on so at least it did still improved from Blazar and will act as a foundation for subsequent series as well. I shouldnt say anymore than this until my overall series review after the final episode lol.

Thanks for the question!

[frigid-moon-fall]

Reaching out to the people doing scans was a great decision. You have no idea how long I spent staring at a listing for the Kratos novel last month, fighting myself because it's so freaking expensive compared to all the other novels... I could get like 10 novels for the same price... 40 if it's from a specific store during a campaign. And nobody seemed to care about the novels (hadn't seen the Phantasia ones being uploaded yet at the time), so who else was going to do it...!! Ended up deciding against it because it's Symphonia, the favorite child, and if anyone was going to give a crap about any of the Tales series novelizations, it'd be Symphonia's, and if they were going to care about any specific novel, it'd definitely be that one, so I might as well pour my blood love into the less popular entries. (And for once, I was right!)

That is to say, I have quite a few Tales novels on the way, and I will also be scanning them (though with a very ancient, borrowed scanner), and there shouldn't be any overlap with what Kevan33 is graciously doing. Here's hoping the box doesn't get lost in the mail :') Hasn't shipped yet, because I'm waiting on one more book to reach the warehouse, which I was only able to afford because I reached out. I would have wasted money getting a few novels that were already going to be scanned. (jfc this one book is also about the same price as the Kratos novel.... But I have a bit of a confusing Personal Investment in this particular one now that I'll share once it's in my hands.)

I wonder if I should try to contact the person going by Stahn's name on archive too? If I'd overlap with anyone, it'd probably be someone named for Destiny stuff. I mean, I guess it doesn't matter if I'd overlap with them since the novels are already bought and paid for and I couldn't get a refund even if I tried. And also they seem to only be uploading guidebooks. (Which are also super heckin' cool because they also have lore in them)

It'll be like 4 months before the box gets here, and it's not just the Destiny novels. So I guess I'll post a list of everything I'll be ripping/scanning just in case. I'd love it if more people did this stuff, so if there's anyone interested in buying stuff like this to continue to archive it (it's not like anyone who contributed to making them is making money off of them anymore. At least, I'm pretty sure they aren't), here's a list of stuff I've already got coming so you can cross it off your own list.

Tales of Destiny novels (tl;dr: ALL OF THEM):

ルーティのルール

青の記憶

天地戦争編

運命をつぐもの上巻

運命をつぐもの下巻

蒼黒の想い上巻

蒼黒の想い下巻

Tales of Destiny 2 novels (tl;dr: ALL OF THEM):

英雄を探す少女

二人の聖女

運命の果てに

蒼黒の追憶上巻

蒼黒の追憶中巻

蒼黒の追憶下巻

朱鷺色の風

Tales of Eternia novels (NOT all of them):

蒼天の星上巻

蒼天の星下巻

暁の約束上巻

暁の約束下巻

リッドのとかげ

キールの希望

(For those keeping track, that means what remains of Eternia is all 3 volumes of 永遠のきざはし, and 聖エルモの灯.)

Misc:

テイルズリング アーカイブ EPIC TWO ～英雄の飛翔～

テイルズオブカウントダウン DVD

テイルズ オブ シンフォニア 4コマミニミニ大図鑑

Do As Infinity - TAO (early demo)

(Note: The Countdown DVD has been partially uploaded and even partially subtitled before, but the full thing has not been uploaded before! I don't know if there's anything hiding on the Peach Gummy DVD (which has been uploaded before) too, but the cheapest way to get the Countdown DVD was in a bundle with that, so I guess I'll have that too. Also I didn't buy anything for the early demo, but I do have the mp3 sitting around from.. somewhere? I swear I got it from Abyssal Chronicles way back when Legendia was first unveiled, but I couldn't find it anywhere even on archived versions of the site. It's clearly an earlier draft of the song and the vocalist is also very clearly Tomiko Van. I couldn't find any mention of this thing anywhere, so am I sitting on Lost Media? Or would uploading it be pointless?)

Misc whose names I'm obscuring because I'm not actually sure if the artists are still making money off of them, give me advice pls

The DVD with the pachislot animation on it. I'm not sure if it's been uploaded in full (none of the few compilations say so), but it's probably never been uploaded in its full quality. I might upload just the video without the audio.

The artbook of the artist of the TODDC manga. I don't know if it's been uploaded in full before. (I found it for pretty cheap, or else I might not have bothered...) Actually, I'd rather someone else with a better scanner and a willingness to unbind it (I'm not unbinding any of these; my hands aren't steady enough) to scan this anyway, so maybe go for this one anyway if you're looking to get stuff scanned.

Also secured by someone else is Tales of Destiny 2's manga, Tales of Destiny Director's Cut's manga, and the French localization of Tales of Destiny's first manga. The first two are already scanned, plans to scan the last one, but I'm not sure if they want to upload them to archive. They are absolutely willing to give them to people who would want to translate them, though.

[fushipurro]

Lessons in Love

Chapter 1 - Matchmaking

Masterlist | Next Chapter ->

☆ Synopsis: Tasked with turning your novel series into a romance, your imagination can only go so far before your lack of experience gets in the way. You turn to a dating app to try and solve this, only to meet rejection after rejection.

That's when you met him.

☆ Content: 18+ MDNI, f!reader, mma!Toji, jjk AU, petnames, foreplay (nipple and vaginal play), creampie, biting/sucking/hickies, tongue action/cunillingus, age gap (10 years)

☆ Word Count: 6.1k

"sorry, but I don't think this is gonna work out."

these were the words you heard date after date, everything seeming so fine in the beginning until you bring up your novel woes and then they don't want to deal with the troublesome baggage affecting their twisted one night fantasies.

"UGH I'm never going to get these stupid chapters done with before my deadline. why did I think this was such a good idea; actually why did I let you talk me into this?"

"It's okay, y/n, I'm sure it'll work out soon. are you sure you can't just BS it from some porn and move on?" your roommate, satoru, questioned. the two of you were enjoying some takeout together as usual since your latest date didn't even last before the entrees came out. the two of you have been friends since high school and eventually became roommates together alongside your other shared friend, suguru.

"hell no, I finally have a good thing going with my publisher and I need this to be perfect and actually feel organic. you'd think someone from the last ten dates would've been willing since I'm practically on my knees begging..." you pouted, sinking deeper into your chair, "guess there's something wrong with me."

"nonsense, you're probably just not giving it enough time or just bad at begging, just keep at it. suguru and I are going to the downtown jujutsu gym later for an mma match they're hosting. you're welcome to tag along and show off some more of how desperate you are to the plenty of other dudes showing up."

your eyebrows furrowed, "ha ha, very funny" which gave satoru a good laugh.

"hey I'm only trying to help, even if you don't meet anyone there, you still have a week until your deadline, no?"

"jee, thanks for reminding me," letting off a frustrated sigh, "but fiiine~ i'll come with you guys, least with you two I can actually make it through one 'date' without being ditched."

satoru shot up out of his chair and shouted to your other roommate who was still getting ready, "yo, suguru! y/n said she'll come with us!"

the trio arrived at the gym together, it was a chilly night and you were all bundled up together, hot drinks in hand as you entered the building.

"thanks for making the drinks, suguru, it's fucking colder in here than outside!" Shivering in your jacket, the pair laughed as they sat down on the bleachers for prime viewing.

"sooo, y/n, see anyone interesting yet to beg to?"

you shot satoru a glare, to which he responded by jokingly patting your back as suguru gave a friendly sigh.

"satoru, we only just got here and from the looks of it, well, there's mainly just women here tonight." suguru had begun to scan the room alongside you while satoru was eyeing up some of the fighters entering the ring. "i'm sure the place will fill out come the main event."

for the first few matches, you seemed glued to the dating app on your phone, checking if anyone nearby came up as a match, swiping away, but such luck though with any pairings.

"oi oi, you may as well just turn that off and pay attention to the matches. maybe you can convince your editor to drop the romance?"

"but i can't─" before even waiting for your reply, satoru took your phone and shoved it into his pocket leaving you with only the drink in your hand, "hey, give that back!"

"not a chance, you gotta watch these next few matches, it's why suguru and I wanted to come here in the first place."

"okay, you win, satoru. like i said last week, i'm not against the romance aspect, even if it isn't quite what i imagined my story to end up as but─"

"yeah yeah, you got no experience and perfectionist problems, you'll work it out."

sighing, you sunk yourself deeper into your hot drink and faced back towards the arena. the following couple fights featured some well built men with decent looks, satoru and suguru were cheering as they discussed the techniques being used and predicting who'd win each fight.

the final fight of the night came at least, you had about enough of watching people punch and kick each other and just wanted to crawl into your warm bed back at home but the pair you were with seemed especially excited about this next fight.

the hosts began announcing the arrival of the fights, one of them caught your eye easily with how much he stood out compared to the rest, a man named "toji zen'in" to be exact. he looked much more well rounded physically compared to everyone else, his arms alone looking thicker than your own waist which made your cheeks turn pink. not to mention the beautiful scar over his lips that caught your eyes the most.

suguru leaned in front of satoru to whisper to you, "keep an eye on toji, y/n, he'd be a good actor for your main character in my opinion."

you nodded back at him, reminded of your woes, all eyes in the building now focused on toji as the crowd went quiet. the fight itself was like none that came before it, more brutal for sure with the hits toji was making, but the way he moved was a lot more than just beating the pulp out of his opponent. it was as if he was toying with his opponents and their weaknesses before delivery fast heavy blows. for someone who didn't know all that much about the sport, you found yourself clenching your fists with an unyielding gaze at toji alone while silently cheering him on with the rest of the crowd.

the match ended and toji was unsurprisingly declared the winner, the crowd in an uproar with clapping and shouting. you were so intently watching the fight that you didn't realize how cramped the building had become, suguru was right earlier, that's for sure. everyone in town wanted to see toji in action. while looking around at the crowd and the fighters cheering, your eyes met with tojis for a moment that left you flushed, squeezing your legs together unconsciously and your irises scattering to look away. it was a though you were a lone sheep cornered by a hungry wolf.

"what'd you think, y/n, happy you came?" satoru asked you as the three of you headed out of the building, on your way back home.

"besides failing to find a potential date, the fights were cool, i can use some of it in my book." your mind flashed to the image of toji looking at you, his eyes engrained in your head, the thought turning your ears red as you looked down at the ground ahead of you hoping to avoid being teased like some middle school girl gushing over her crush.

"you're looking flushed, are you feeling okay?"

for a moment you didn't hear suguru's question before he tapped on your shoulder. "oh yeah, sorry, I'm still just cold is all." nothing gets past suguru, the man is beyond observant of those close to him.

"well, we're home now at least, so go warm off and get some sleep, you have that deadline coming up." as caring as he can be though, that still doesn't stop him from a few sadistic smiles here and there as he teases you for your ever so fun reactions.

"oh for the love of─ not you too, suguru!!" pouting as the three of you entered your building together. as you closed the door behind you, you turned back to satoru. "can i get my phone back now?"

"okay okay, but don't sit there staring at it until dawn again trying to find a match." satoru handed you back your phone, refusing to let go of it to you until you agreed before heading off to his room. he knows you better than that and all your habits from the few years of being roommates

after a warm shower, you laid there all tucked into your bed, brooding as you watched the ceiling, imagining toji's face strung across the white paint like stars until you rolled over face down into one of your pillows.

god why am I gushing so much, we don't even know each other

"can't hurt to at least look a little bit" phone in hand, you turned it back on and immediately got a buzz from the dating app appearing on your lockscreen. the notification time revealing that it occurred while you in the gym and had your phone off.

great, well there goes a face to face opportunity instead of wasting time with a date they'd probably run away from

you opened the app to check, unprepared as you were hit with a welcome message showing who you were matched with. it was none other than toji zen'in.

your eyes blankly staring at your phone as it registered what this meant, "you're kidding, right?" his dating profile showcased a shirtless photo of himself in front of a mirror, having obviously finished a workout when he took the photo. bruises adorning his body from training and a few others more suspicious like they hadn't come from a fight whatsoever. a decade older than you, hobbies including fighting and gambling.

"who even puts gambling down..." you continued to lay there staring only at the photo he chose, glossing over each muscle line and eating his body up with your eyes, the way his hair fell into his face, that pretty scar you traced over with your finger. suddenly your phone buzzed, with the app now showing a new message received within the app

toji zenin you enjoy the fight, sweetheart? sent: 11:02pm

your chest now soaring as you shot up in bed, trying to rein in control of your shaky hands to form a response.

oh god did he know before our eyes met? and already a petname...

y/n fushiguro i did, it was enjoyable for me, congrats on winning! sent: 11:03pm

toji zenin was easy enough, i've fought better opponents in back alleys. sent: 11:04pm

damn, well aren't you a little cocky?

y/n fushiguro that's dangerous lol, are you aiming to impress me with that? sent: 11:07pm

you allowed yourself to relax back into your bed, your eyes staring only at his name and icon on the screen wondering if it was worth continuing this conversation. bad enough it was already late at night and you just wanted to sleep, but the thought of even telling him about your novel formed a pit in your stomach.

can't imagine mr. muscle brain here would be willing to work with me

toji zenin think I did enough of a first impression earlier. dinner tomorrow at 7? my treat, doll. sent: 11:11pm

"aaaa you're not making this any easier for me..."

y/n fushiguro sure, I'd like that sent: 11:11pm

"ugh, down to the minute too, how far into depravity i've fallen... whatever, i'll give it one more shot to save this book."

you turned your lamp off and rolled over to sleep, though it didn't come early for you when all you could think about was toji.

the next day eventually arrived, and you greeted your roommates for breakfast as you always do.

"yo, y/n, stay up late checking out more guys?" satoru was already digging in while suguru was in the kitchen still making pancakes for you all.

"didn't need to, as a matter of fact, I got a match and he invited me to dinner tonight." your voice declared it with so much pride that you almost forgot the circumstances surrounding why you're even on the dating app to begin with.

"oh yeah? the guy got a name? what's their bio like?" satoru loved to encourage you to adventure, but at the same time always showed his protective side when it came to matters involving you or suguru.

"believe it or not, it's that toji guy from last night."

"TOJI?" the white haired man shot up, "toji zen'in is your date?" his arms grabbed your shoulders in disbelief, he wanted so badly to grab your phone and inspect the dating app himself like he typically does but you kept it in a tight grip away from him. "you're going to ask him for help with your book, aren't you? you could just not mention it and keep him hooked at least for one dinner."

"idk, satoru, i don't want to lie but i also need to get this stupid deadline done and out of the way already." taking your hands, you covered your frustrated face. "i'll see how it goes but hopefully we can make it far enough to actually get our food."

"if it doesn't then suguru and I will rescue you and we can hit up some more takeout."

"thanks guys."

the day seemed to drag on at a snail's pace. toji eventually sending you details of where to meet up, the restaurant being one that was simple but surprisingly fancier than you'd expect a brute to invite you to. you fitted yourself into a nice mid length skirt and a frilly blouse, patent leather high heels, stockings, jewelry, nice hair, everything you need to make an impression. you didn't mean to get as fancy as you did but that's what happens when you have too much time on your hands and a bundle of nerves.

you took a taxi to the restaurant, entering through the wooden doors to a dimly lit scarlet room. a host greeting you at the door, "welcome miss, may I have your name, please?"

"fushiguro."

"ah yes, miss fushiguro. your date has already arrived, if you'll please just follow me, I can take your jacket then."

the waiter quickly and carefully moved your jacket to a coat rack and walked you over to your table. the walk to the table was one of the hardest parts of the night so far, you could already see him from across the restaurant, his seat positioned to watch you strut over to him. he shifted in his seat upon making eye contact, those deep green orbs looking you up and down conveying what his mouth wouldn't dare speak just yet. you thanked the waiter and sat down across from your date.

as soon as he opened his mouth to speak, his deep voice tickled your body creating goosebumps all down your neck. it wasn't what you expected him to sound like but oh how it made you flutter in your seat. "don't you look nice, doll, got all pretty just for me?"

oh god don't start flirting now

your exposed ears once again turned a soft shade of pink, "nice to meet you in person, toji."

the man repositioned once more, leaning forward to get a better look at you. "so what's a pretty girl like yourself doing on a dating app?"

no no no please don't make me come out and ask already

"uh─ ahem, a few reasons, mainly just to meet someone like anyone else on here I suppose, haha." you nervously laughed.

while not exactly a lie, I can at least hold off on wrecking this...

"on a dating app? doll you're just gonna find one night stands." his eyes narrowed at you with a questioning look.

"is that why you're on them?" hoping you didn't unintentionally sound rude or invasive, you tried to soften your gaze to show that it's just how you are.

"sometimes they can be fun, you already feeling jealous over me, princess?" he smirked, and before you could reply past your blushing face, the waiter delivered you your choice of red wine and took both of your orders.

"you drink?" he asked, almost disappointed sounding in his voice.

"not often, just enough to help me relax. helps sometimes when i'm working on my novels─" shit I brought it up "you don't?"

"nah, shit's wasted on me, can't get drunk."

"really? haha, well maybe that's better in your line of work, strict diets and all."

"you write novels for work? what about?"

please no toji, the food isn't even here yet, i'm too starved to do this now...

"yeah, right now I'm working on a book involving two assassins, but I'm struggling a bit making their romance happen. enemies to lovers is a fun concept but hard for me to write, personally."

fuck this wine, I'm slipping already without food on my stomach, curse me being a lightweight

"oh? why's that?"

saved by the bell as your waiter finally arrived with your entrees, it took everything you had to not tear into it like some fast food fries after a long day in the parking lot. you both began enjoying your meals, toji however took his time, seemingly spending more of it filling his eyes with you instead of his body of the food before him.

the food was delicious, you both ended up with a nice strip of steak, delicately seasoned with a lovely sauce over top. it paired perfectly with your choice of wine. normally your dates would've ended long before this, but toji ended up ordering desert for you, and waited perfectly until the waiter cleared the table to continue working you over.

"you haven't answered my question yet, y/n."

"ahh, you remembered..." you sighed, "well I won't lie since we've come this far, but I'm struggling on a particular romance scene since frankly I'm not experienced enough."

"no kidding? you're writing this stuff and yet you're a virgin?" the man started laughing and reclined in his seat with his one arm over the back, subconsciously spreading his legs further apart than they were before.

"I'm not a virgin, toji!" you carefully protested, trying not to draw attention to yourself. "I've had a boyfriend before but that didn't work out."

"and that's why you're on a dating app? sweetheart that's just asking to be taken advantage of by some lowlife loser."

"you'd think so but the last ten dates I've been on this month alone avoided me like the plague the moment I set the conditions."

toji sighed and pinched the top of his nose with his large digits, "that's cause you're picking shit men, princess. they just want some easy ass to get themselves off to, nothing more."

the waiter came back with your desert, a rich cheesecake slice that you both shared together like a couple. with a fork in your hand, analyzing the piece with such soft eyes that didn't go unnoticed.

"I have a deadline coming up and as my roommate always says, I'm too much of a perfectionist to just make shit up for it without proper research."

toji remained silent as the two of you polished desert off and paid the check for dinner. the wine from earlier still hitting you as you nearly stumbled leaving the restaurant with him.

"shit─ forgot to get a taxi ready, thanks for the lovely meal, toji, it was nice finishing a date for once."

"oh no, princess, we're not done yet. you think I'm gonna let you go off on your own like this? I'm taking you home myself."

"huh, wai─" toji took your hand into his own and lead you down the road to his nice black muscle car. his hand was much larger than yours and oh so warm to the touch. he kept you carefully balanced, remarking that you should be a good girl and not drink alcohol if you can't handle it. you almost didn't want to let go until he opened the passenger door to settle you down into the fine leather seats. he was quiet for most of the trip until an unusually long red light finally made him speak up.

"when's your deadline?"

you moved your gaze off the surrounding street lamps and onto the side of his face and down to his hands gripping the wheel and shifter.

"next week."

"I'll help you out."

did I mishear? am I too drunk to understand? he actually wants to help me, this big shot fighter and the stranger he just met today?

toji side eye'd you before the light changed, an out of sight smile glossing his face as he saw your obvious blushing and innocence showing.

"really? you'd do that even though you don't know me?"

his lips parted slightly, "doll, I know your pretty little self enough from dinner and I'm driving you home, aren't I? I ain't letting some other asshole take advantage of your virginity you're just throwing out there."

"i'm. not. a. VIRGIN!" you protested once more, this time making toji laugh at how much of a cute brat you were being.

"whatever you say, sweetheart, you're too innocent still to not be one. that ex of yours doesn't sound like he could do the job right."

finally, the two of you pulled up to your apartment building and made your way inside together, toji supporting you from tripping in the heels you wanted to wear to show off like some big time femme fatale novelist. inside, you could see that neither of your rommmates' shoes were there.

must be out eating then still

you almost forgot toji was even there as you started heading towards the kitchen for some water, dropping your heels off on the floor as you left the entry.

"oi, princess, ya just gonna leave me here?"

"oh shi─, you can stay here for a bit if you wanted. you want a drink, toji?"

the man was already leaning down over the island table when you handed him a glass, smiling at you with his head leaning on his hand and the other on the table. he only took a quick sip before placing it back on the counter.

"so what do ya say? ya want the experience?"

it was like toji knew how to push your buttons to make you blush, this was an experienced hunk of a man and no matter how much tried to deny it, you were far too vanilla and inexperienced.

"I mean... well... you are here and survived dinner with me, wha-what do you wanna do?" your voice was soft and flustered, your core stunned with butterflies. eyes unable to make contact even as he approached you to set your shaking hands down before you had some glass to clean off the floor. he moved his thick hand up under your chin, his thumb gracing your bottom lip as toji pushed your head back to try and force eye contact out of you.

"for now, just take me to your bed and leave the rest to me. I promise to take good care of ya if you be a good girl for me."

toji stayed a few paces behind you, watching you lead him to your room. oh how exposed you're feeling, for a man who just had dinner, he just felt so ravenous still. entering your room, toji locked the door behind him, your back was still turned, eyes staring ahead at your bed. it felt tight being in your skin, you wanted this, but he was right, this was a whole different fealing than the one your ex ever gave you. you felt his hands tickle your back as they fell onto your waist, his head leaning into your neck, breathing into your ear as toji loosely traced your skin with his fingers.

you almost lost control of your knees before he spun you around and moved his lips just in front of yours, hands reaching behind you with a tight grip. you closed your eyes and parted your lips for him, toji took full advantage and started with a few simple kisses at first before rubbing his tongue against yours. he pulled back with a string of drool following, his tongue still exposed as he caressed your face.

"fuck, y/n, you taste even better than you look."

"i-is it hot in here or just me, I should turn the temp dow─"

toji grabbed your arm and pulled you back into his embrace, setting you down on the foot of your bed, arms at either side of you as he leaned down into your face to continue the dance of your tongues.

"just relax, princess, you're gonna be sweatin' anyways in a minute."

taking his knee, toji began pushing his way forward in between your legs, pressing against your clit as he continued kissing you. his hands began unbuttoning your blouse until it revealed your bra. he encouraged your hands to do the same to remove his shirt. toji's back was a whole other world. tight with muscles, soft skin with some scars adorning him. you traced over each one you found with your fingers. while you were busy with that, the older man unhooked your bra, discarded it along with your shirt to the other side of your room.

"look at you, pretty girl." he eyed your face down to your chest, cupping your breasts in hand. your hips bucked in response over his knees. you noticed a large bulge forming on the older man, his erection no doubt and god was it obvious how gifted he was in that department. "you're already soaking my leg up, doll, do i make you that excited?"

"y-yes, fuck─ toji."

"good girl, now lay back for me."

you followed his instruction, to which he lifted your legs up and removed your skirt. his fingers playing with your clothed clit, making you buck and squeeze your legs around him.

"gotta keep still if you want me to help, y/n."

"sorry, toji." you moaned in response. he pressed deeper into your lips with his fingers as much as the stockings would allow as a punishment of sorts.

"don't be sorry, doll, i want you to enjoy what i'm doin to ya."

toji removed the stockings from you legs, ever so slowly so his fingertips could glide down your inner legs for another satisfactory moan to escape you. he leaned his head in after, tongue to your lower lips.

"you're soaked, sweetheart. you taste so fucking good, fuck─" the squelching sounds from you getting more defined with every action he did. kissing, nibbling, and best of all, extending his tongue as deep as he could inside you. it was hard to not squirm and disrupt the ecstasy, but toji kept a firm grip around your thighs to the point you knew they'd be bruised later.

"toj- fuck, toji!" your voice reduced to babbles and high pitched squeals.

"keep your eyes on me, doll." you wanted so badly to throw your head back as the bubbling sensation grew inside of you, tickling the nerves in your body. the way your eyes kept meeting, the sight of a man you keep gushing over, eating you out with everything he's got was just so irresistible. "cum on me, y/n."

the two of you moaning together, his tongue getting more invasive and his thumb rolling over your pearl until you finally orgasmed. toji finally lifted his head up, your shiny essence marking his lips as yours.

"shit─ i can't get enough of ya, sweetheart, fuck."

your hands were on your own breasts, grabbing at your nipples to help with the orgasm you achieved.

"for someone who acts so innocent with me, your body is acting like a slut. were you this soaked seeing me last night too?"

the answer was obvious the way you avoided eye contact from toji again, you tried to squeeze your legs back together, but he simply stood up and unbuckled his pants. you could already see a spot of wetness near where his tip must be and where you rode against his knee.

"fuck, toji, that's not gonna fit in me!" his erect cock was long and girthy, plenty of veins like his arms, the tip pink and leaking precum.

"i said i'll take care of ya, princess." he crawled onto the bed, leaning over your face, brushing the hair aside with fingers and kissing you softly with your juices joined together. "trust me, y/n."

you nodded your head and toji moved back down to sit next to you. taking one finger at a time, he moved around your lower lips, brushing against your velvet walls as his other hand stroked his own cock. you leaned up a bit to feel his own manhood in your hands, your delicate fingers moving up and down and circling the tip. spreading the sticky residue around.

"fuck─ look what you're doing to me, doll." your mouths were agape, close to one other, squirming from the stimulation. "you're so fucking pretty, y/n, shit─" he moaned, leaking more from his tip as you came on his fingers.

toji placed his wet digits in your mouth, allowing your tongue to work them over, tasting your own juices with hips bucking in response. you placed your hands over your arms and looked deep in his green eyes drunk on love.

"you keep looking at me like that and i'm going to forget about being cautious with ya."

he let you continue to play around with his fingers until he pushed you back down against your sheets. he kneeled then in between your legs, rubbing his cock against your clit and around the entry.

"well, princess?"

you nodded to toji, but that wasn't good enough so he slapped his tip down on your pearl.

"use your words."

"pl-please fuck me, toji!"

"that's my good girl." and with that, he started pushing his way into you. your hips squirming, nails digging into the sheets around you as you couldn't stop the moans escaping your throat.

toji moved in and out slowly at first, "you sound so pretty too, doll, shit─ i lucked out meeting you." his moans were deep and filled your ears, it was impossible to stay still even with his calloused hands tight around your waist. your eyes were all over the place feeling almost completely far off from the world in your own slice of paradise. toji's kept going back and forth between his thrusts, your breasts, and especially the beautiful reactions coming over your face.

"told ya i'd take care of you, you can still take more of my cock, right, princess?"

"there's m-m-more!?"

a smile stretched across his face along with narrowed eyes as he slowed his thrusts and started pushing the rest into you, the tip practically shoved against your womb, rearranging your insides.

"FUCK, toji!" you screamed, a few tears forming around your eyes.

"sorry, sweetheart. it'll get easier, i promise. you're being so fucking good, i'll have to reward you." he coo'd, leaning over to caress your cheeks with his finger.

his motions continued, lifting your legs up and back, hips raised up and bucking with each smack of his heavy balls against you. toji held your arms up above your head as you dug into his wrists with your nails, babbling nonsense between loud moans and yelps. his raven hair dripping slightly with sweat as it fell over his face.

"can i, fuck─, cum inside you? i want to reward your good behavior."

"-ease don't stop, toji." puppy dog eyes unbecoming of an innocent girl aimed directly at toji, his veins twitching inside you as he relentlessly sucked on your neck, allowing your fingers to carve his back out. the fluttering sensation higher than ever before and the sudden onset of warmth flooded your insides. you bucked and twisted yourself, toes curling in as you moaned the name of the man fucking you senseless.

"shit, your tight pussy is emptying me."

it almost made you cum again as he exited and the juices inevitably flushing out. toji admired the view and praised you once more for being such a good girl for him. he turned you over onto your back, your face now shoved against your pillow. toji placed his hand behind your kneecap and lifted up as he thrusted back into you. it's no wonder there's a million different positions when it comes to sex. each one seems to hit a different g-spot you never knew existed sending you further into an abyss of decadence.

his mouth was moaning aside your ear, his tight chest landing on your back with each thrust. despite being face first smothered in your pillow, no hummed moans went unnoticed by toji, each one being rewarded with the climactic feeling until he once again coated your insides with his hot seed.

"oh fuck, toji." you puffed, attempting to catch your breath.

"yes, sweetheart?"

"that felt so good but i don't think i'm out of stamina..." your body was weak and tired, while nearly sobered from your wine, you were very much drunk off his cock. body still shaken and ecstatic, hips reactive to the slightest touch as you squeezed your thighs together to savor the feeling of your orgasm.

toji caressed your lower back with the back of his hands, "told ya, all you had to do was be a good girl and i'd take care of ya. unlike some other assholes." he grabbed a few tissues to clean you up a bit and himself. "you got a shower then we can use?"

"we?" you questioned, rolling over to face him.

"oh yes, we. you ain't walkin' for shit after this even if you wanted to."

protesting a bit with your usual pouts, you tried to stand up to prove the older man wrong but your legs slipped and you fell back into his arms.

"...carry me?" the puppy dog eyes were back again with a booboo lip to compliment your trained begging.

"is that how good girls ask for help?"

"pleaaase~, toji?"

he laughed while he swooped you up into a bridal carry. you pointed the way to your bathroom where toji took care in helping you clean off in the shower, teaching you another lesson in love before getting out and returning to bed together. toji laid on his back, looking at you while your head rested where his arm meets his thick chest. you were long gone into your slumber as you drooled onto him with an innocent face that seduced the older man futher.

"so fragile and defenseless... gonna have to keep ya around with me for good, sweetheart."

morning came and toji was still sleeping like a bear when you got up. taking the first shirt you found in hand and a pair of fresh lacy panties, you stumbled out to the kitchen to find some food, rubbing your tired eyes along the way.

"did you forget that you have roommates, y/n?"

your body tightened, "oh fuck, satoru." turning towards the voice, you see suguru and satoru already at the table eating.

"there's leftover eggs in the pan if you're looking for some food."

"suguruuuu," you looked at him with pleading eyes, thankful that he always knew you'd be hungry as well and joining them to eat.

"by the way, whose shoes are those at the entrance?" he asked, you were going to answer but then a deep voice interrupted.

"mine."

"toji, your shirt!" you yelped, satoru dropped his utensils at the sight of the fighter walking around your shared apartment bare chest and all.

"toji slept over!?"

"someone, decided to take my shirt if you hadn't noticed yet."

"shit─ sorry i didn't realize when i grabbed it, still sleepy."

"keep it then, princess, it's all yours to keep me in that pretty little head of yours." toji approached where you were in the kitchen and placed his hand on the top of your head refusing to move it as you struggled to not die of embarrassment in front of your roommates.

"we're still here, you know? did you forget us again? that's kinda fucked up, y/n." satoru joked, throwing himself into the situation like a third wheel while suguru just sat there eating and smiling.

toji pointed his thumb back at the pair, "who are they? your shitty exes?"

satoru's jaw dropped, ready to raise a fist before as suguru pulled him back down to his seat.

"oh god no, toji, these are my roommates, satoru and suguru. we've been best friends for years."

"good. if they were your exes, i'd be showing them what a lowlife they are for not treating ya properly."

"jeez, well aren't you protective of me, feeling jealous already?" your tone jokingly mocking the way he too questioned your "jealous" feelings last night on your date.

toji cupped your chin once more to make eye contact with a devious smile, "you think this is the only time i'm gonna be seeing ya?" he moved his face in closer, brushing your lips with his own as he traveled to your ears to whisper, "you're mine, princess. there's a lot more to teach ya as i corrupt your innocence even further."

by now your face was as red as the fruit on the table as he laughed and began preparing his own plate of breakfast. the four of you trying to enjoy breakfast together without a fight breaking out. toji's hand was gripping your thigh under the table while caressing with his thumb. you smiled, taking in the moment and how wonderful it felt to finally have something to finish your deadline and a new boyfriend to fill your heart and much more.

☆ Notes: really enjoyed writing this so look forward to more in the future! i know mma toji is popular but it's just such a fitting career path for an au especially over other fighting/athletic careers.

[goblincow]

So I made a journal for Dungeon23! I'm going to upload it to the jam as a tool for people to use, it's a collection of 54 a4 pages folded into 8-page A6 booklets with a tidy white space at the edge of each page. Each one has a different coloured logo front page in a 52-week gradient, plus one on black and one on grey. They have a tidy non-repro cyan dotted grid interior on all 8 sides with a logo on the cover that I pulled from the d23 asset pack by Lone Archivist.

This is just a prototype and I printed it on the back of some already used paper but I will print properly and fold (and time it so I can add that info to the downloads page too) all 54 booklets and I'll also upload them in b&w and all cyan versions (for easy erasure when scanned - which will also immediately turn them into shareable print-and-fold booklets for you to share with other people)!

There is absolutely nothing else but dots on any of the pages so it's free to use however best suits you and each book has pages for 7 days and a dotted grid cover so every week you'll create a complete booklet with much less of the pressure of trying to fill a journal.

-----

If you want to keep up a writing exercise I think you should make it as easy as possible: this way you get to look back every week and you can always stop at the end of each week without the pressure to continue (so really you'll end up more likely to continue and only if you're still having fun) and you can have a fresh start every time you finish a booklet and start a new week.

Maybe you don't want to do one 52-week mega-dungeon? Why not 52 week-long dungeons instead?!

I'm going to see if I can bind them all together at the end and have one really chunky A6 book, or maybe just into 12 months and appendices!

-----

I'm also going to layer all the different coloured logos on top of each other to create a cool graphic (they span a neat CMY gradient that cycles into darker tones for the last few weeks) and maybe I'll make that the cover for the lot and put it as a banner on the itch page when I make it?

I'm excited to poke around at the design (I'll probably add at least a calendar and blank table for references in one of the two additional booklets) and publish the final thing tomorrow if I can!

I'm also probably going to recycle most of what I've written here and just tidy it up a bit for the jam submission because I don't want to make more work for myself.

MICRO-ZINE DUNGEON 2023 the complete original series, first edition issues #1 - #52 plus appendices #1 and #2, containing the first ever appearance of the Grim Chasms of Bolgrar Th'zapp and the Enclave of Lesser Evils! Hand-written and signed by the author!

Now that would be a pretty cool thing to have on your shelf.

Ok I think I'm gonna do d23 but I'm gonna do it a bit different.

I will have a diary just for it and every day I will add SOMETHING be it an illustration or a passage of text or a "room" description because I'm designing an endless forest graveyard and oh no you don't remember how you got here and you don't remember a time before and we're going to figure out the mystery together day by day.

I might even draw a tarot card for each week? I mean what is even the difference between making up a dungeon and playing an rpg (there isnt one). I've got some spooky washi tape, I'm just gonna have a good time.

[ghostsofmemories]

hey lovely people! i am finally making a real writeblr introduction to pin to my profile, because i finally like my url and thus am happy to put it on a little graphic. anyway, let’s get on with this this.

some basics:

my name is August (he/him)!

i’m 20

i’m from Michigan (US)

i’m aroace and trans!

i write literary fiction novels and poetry (and maybe short stories if i can ever figure those out)

i’m a cancer and an infj! not super into star signs or even mbti anymore but it’s still cool

my projects (in no particular order):

Where Edges Meet Soft Things, a poetry collection i've been selling my soul to for the last four years. it’s about joy and pain and fathers and the past. it's everything to me.

Insect Poison, a novel i have been fighting with for 5 years now. it was originally about a serial killer and a group of teenagers he kidnaps, but now it’s follows a set of twins, Robert and Ramona, and the turn the family takes after Ramona drowns in a lake in the middle of the night. did her brother do it? was it an accident? did she lowkey deserve it? these are questions i cannot answer because i do not know. what i can tell you is that i'll finish this book even if it kills me, and there will definitely be a ghost in it.

i run a little side project i call The Photo Archive, which is essentially me scanning and posting vintage photographs from old magazines and books (mainly national geographic but there's many others as well) to make sure they don't get lost to time and that the photographers are credited. i run a separate tumblr for it (@thephotoarchive) but the brunt of the project takes place on pinterest, where i'm able to sort the photos into boards based on source material and other people can share them to their own boards. if you ever see my poetry overlaid on some cool vintage pictures, that's where they came from! it's really just a passion project, but if you're a collage artist or photography enthusiast i'm sure scrolling through the pinterest for a couple minutes will be fun!

okay so now if you’re only really here for writing, feel free to peace out because this is where i start talking about other stuff! if other stuff interests you, feel free to carry on.

my hobbies outside writing include reading, art, photography, crochet, guitar, singing + music production, and applying for jobs i’m not qualified for. 

here are some other fun facts/some of my favorite things if you’re still here:

i have a wonderful cat named Nemo

my favorite books are The Vanishing Half by Brit Bennett, Cloud Cuckoo Land by Anthony Doerr, The Hollow Kind by Andy Davidson, Mouthful of Birds by Samanta Schweblin, and Time is a Mother by Ocean Vuong

i have a slightly unhealthy (but otherwise harmless) fixation on Taylor Swift

if you also like Taylor Swift i already know you’re wondering. my favorite album is evermore but i truly do love them all very much

i very rarely watch movies or TV shows, but my favorite show is The Haunting of Hill House (and all the Mike Flanagan series are in my top 5 shows, Midnight Mass is a close second)

i have literally never had caffeine, aside from a few sips of a few sodas

as you have probably figured out, i really like ghosts. metaphorical ghosts, fictional ghosts, evidence and stories of possible real-life ghosts and obviously just ghost stories in general. i just think they’re neat

well. i think that’s about it. i’m still trying to figure out how to post here again (specifically how i want to format my poetry), but you can see a lot more content from me on instagram! i post poems when i can and post on my stories way more than anyone would want to see.

and there you have it, an intro.

[ryosmne]

Tattoo Artist! Sukuna x reader (part 3)

Hey there again, I had a few ideas of where i wanted to take the third part, I'm very happy with what I came up with, it's very very fluffy, I hope you have a good time reading 💜.

Series masterlist here

Here's a playlist for fluffy Sukuna

Warnings: Language, suggestive tones, alcohol consumption (everyone is of age here, around 21/22), nudity? Not really described, that's about it.

Saturday was slow for Sukuna, he doesn't really like working away his weekends, but here he is, finishing up a chest piece that looked good if he had to say so himself. Everything was luckluster to him compared to the project he was still drafting for y/n.

Speaking of her she hadn't texted him all day, neither did Sukuna. He told himself he wasn't clingy like that, she texted him before she would do it again surely. Y/n didn't pay much mind to him not making contact, perhaps he was busy. She wasn't wrong, she also had initiated most of their text conversations, she didn't want to seem desperate. Sukuna was going to contact her when he was free.

On the other hand Sukuna was stressed, passing in the hallway between the reception and his work booth, checking his phone every once in a while, he was a bit snappier than usual, not letting Gojo's or Megumi's remarks go, he would answer back, his voice almost dripping with venom, he was very much pissed and it showed.

When closing time finally came he was ready to blow up, Gojo teasing him, only made him more agitated. Gojo knew something was bothering him and he wasn't planning on dropping the subject.

"Hey 'kuna, tell the truth, you took her out and she left because she couldn't stand you, that's why you're so mad."

The white haired man joked, you could see the smoke coming out Sukuna's ears.

"Don't call me that. For your information, me and y/n had a great time, quit being an bumbass I'm not mad." Y/n did enjoy herself right? It sure looked like it. Was Sukuna getting insecure? Yes. Could everyone tell he was lying about not being mad? Also Yes.

"Oh so it's 'you and y/n' now? You were right Geto, he's got it real bad, he's not even calling her 'some girl' or something."

Gojo continued to laugh, he was enjoying every single second of torment he was putting Sukuna through.

He had enough though, he grabbed his jacket and his keys, but just before he left the rest of his crew and Yuuji, who came to eat with Megumi to close, he called to the most rational person inside. "Geto, come on I'll drive you home." Sukuna needed someone to talk to, he needed to know he was in the right and not going totally insane. Nanami was really close to him but relationships wasn't a topic he would really touch on. Gojo was out of the question, the man was a womaniser, not that it was a bad thing but he wouldn't even take Sukuna seriously, he only wanted to annoy him for the time being. Megumi was also a no. He would spill the beans to Yuuji, he already had Gojo on his ass he didn't need two more idiots making fun of him, one was barely tolerable. That only left Geto, who has at least had a few solid relationships and he was trustworthy enough not to give him too much shit.

Geto grabbed the chance not to have to clean for one night, but he was very curious about Sukuna's sudden move to give him a ride home, he has never offered that before. Yuuji had tipped him off, he knew his brother wanted to get all of the attention, if y/n didn't make a move, his brother would go insane. He was surprisingly right, so Yuuji told Geto to try and get his brother riled up. Now Geto didn't exactly agree, but he wanted to give Sukuna a friendly nudge to the right direction.

Sukuna had already been driving for a little while, he couldn't find the courage to open his mouth and talk. Has he gone mad? Its not like he's clueless about girls, he's had many. Why was it different this time?

"So how come you wanna drive me around at night?" The raven haired man asked, eyebrow raised, ready to hear what his friend was so on edge for all day, even though he had an idea. Sukuna wasn't one to share feelings, he never did, he couldn't really tell anyone the reason why not a single word from y/n all day irked him so damn much. "Look, so let's say there's this girl right? You take her out, you have fun, everything is cruising perfectly, but then she doesn't really talk to you the next day." He said with a small pause "hypothetically speaking" He added, just to avoid further questions.

Geto looked at him with a blank face, although he couldn't really believe in his ears, Yuuji was right, he knew his friend was falling face first, it still surprised him. He saw the day that Sukuna was stressed for a girl, if someone told him even two weeks ago that this was going to happen happen, Geto most definitely would've laughed straight in their face.

"Well it depends really, for example did you text her and she didn't answer? Then yeah, she's not interested, but maybe she's busy, or she started texting first and she wants you to initiate." Sukuna blinked "You're right she's busy, she has a test too, maybe she has been studying, she'll come around." He said, the words came fast out of his mouth. Geto looked at him again more serious this time. "Look man, I know for a fact, you haven't texted first, you seem to really like her, don't be a pussy and send her one text." His tone was equally serious. "I'm just fond of her, that's all she's good company." Sukuna tried to brush him off, Geto wouldn't budge. "Call it what you want, I know you like the feisty ones, so do many people and you know how college kids are, one party is all it takes to lead to who knows what. Man up, when you do you can bring her around the shop too, you know we all would love to meet her." By the time Geto finished his sentence, Sukuna had already parked outside of his apartment to drop him off, they shared their good nights.

For the rest of his lonely drive home Sukuna couldn't help but think of that party his brother mentioned a couple nights ago, was y/n going to be there? And Geto's words kept replaying in his head.

Geto was smiling to himself walking inside his apartment knowing he did the right thing giving his friend a slight push.

With her hair just the way she liked it, her make-up done and an outfit that extenuated her best features, y/n was making her way down the street to meet up with Mai outside of Todo's place. The walk wasn't too long and y/n caught a glimpse of her short haired friend, who was also dressed to impress, standing right out of Todo's door.

"You didn't wait long did you?" Y/n asked, Mai smilled and shook her head, she was the late one most of the time, she did make it just a second before y/n arrived.

"Let's go, my sister and Nobara are waiting" she informed y/n, who nodded. "Really, I haven't seen Maki in a while, Nobara rarely shows up in class too." She said full of excitement, the girls were friends for a long while, even before college. Mai and y/n ended up forming closer friendship.

"Yeah they're about to remind us of how single we are." Mai loved her sister with all her heart, she was very competitive though and when Maki got with Nobara before Mai could strike up a boyfriend in college, she took it a bit personally. Then she focused her attention on finding someone for y/n, but that never went well. Hopping right up the stairs both girls were talking about what they would see tonight, more accurately who. "So Yuuji is probably going to be here, I asked Todo" Mai said her eyes hopefull, y/n rolled her's and her companion didn't let it go unnoticed. "I really don't get you, he's cute, you even said so." There she goes again, but y/n wouldn't let it slide this time. "You seem way more giddy to see him, than I do." She said, knocking on Todo's door who was waiting right behind it, answering in seconds. Mai was still dumbfounded, she hardly acknowledged Todo at the door and made her way inside with y/n.

Thankfully the sofa on Todo's living room they usually sat on was only occupied by Maki and Nobara. "Wow sis you made it on time for once without someone dragging you out the house." Maki hugged her sister tightly, "I didn't really have a choice, y/n said she would go home if I was late again." Mai, said with a bit of a whine. Nobara went for y/n. "She's giving you hell huh?" Her comment made the girl laugh. "Nah she's fine, she can be a bit of a baby." That line made Mai slap her arm playfully, even when they made digs at each other, it was all in good fun.

Y/n could see Mai out the corner of her eye scanning the room, it wasn't unusual for her to do that, but it was the fourth time the past 30 minutes they've been here. Something was definitely up with her, and when she raised her hand having finally spotted the one she was looking for, y/n was a hundred percent sure of what was going on.

"Yuuji, over here" Mai called hand in the air, a very friendly smile on her face. Yuuji eagerly walked over offering his greetings, his attention was on y/n "Hey, has my brother texted you at all?" That was an out of the blue question. Mai gave her a look "His brother?" She questioned, then looked back at Yuuji "You've got a brother?" Why did he have to say that infront of Mai, she wouldn't leave her alone until she told her everything about the guy, she was at least thankful he didn't mention a date, Sukuna probably hadn't mentioned anything to him. "Oh yeah, he's the one I went to last week and no Yuuji he hasn't, did something happen?" Mai stayed silent, so did the other girls, they planned on interrogating her later, judging by the looks they exchanged. "Oh it's nothing" Yuuji let out a breathy laugh, knowing he plotted with Geto to get under his brother's skin. Payback for the bagels he baked at 4 am was going to be sweet.

Yuuji took a seat next to Mai, who introduced him to her sister, Nobara already knew him short of and the two of them begun chatting casually. Y/n could see the chemistry between them as he complimented the dark haired girl on the way she looked tonight. She could see their eyes meeting, something more than friendliness resided in the looks they shared.

Y/n let her friend have her fun, at this point Maki and Nobara had adopted her taking shots, talking about the annoying situations that have occurred in the time they hadn't seen each other. Nobara in particular, was sharing her frustrations about men not taking her seriously as Maki's significant other and continuing to make moves on her partner. "I shut them down" Maki said proudly snaking an arm around her girlfriend's waist. "I know you do, I just want them to feel a bit threatened" Nobara's eyes drifted to the floor . "What are you talking about? Remember the time you just looked at that guy eyeing her and he mouthed 'sorry'? You're very threatening." Y/n took another shot laughing with the two girls. Her comment was quite comforting to Nobara and Maki knew that things always went Nobara's way, she just liked complaining sometimes, she was the jealous type.

Todo with Takada in hand, who arrived right after y/n and Mai, answers his door again for the multipluth time this evening, seeing the last person he expected. "I thought you were too old for house parties" he taunted at the grumpy man infront of him. "Screw you I'm 26, and I didn't come empty handed" Sukuna spoke, his tone getting a bit friendlier at the last words in his sentence. He passwd the two bottles of vodka he held to Todo. "Well come on in, Yuuji's brother is also mine" he said giving the pink haired man a friendly hug.

Sukuna's eye scanned his living room untill his eyes landed on the back of y/n's head, he headed straight her way.

Y/n heard a few girls around her making a fuss over some apparently really hot guy who just entered, but she didn't bother turning around. That was until she heard it "Huh, who would've known, you actually have friends" That voice was unmistakably his. Sukuna was here. Y/n's heart was fluttering in her chest but the alcohol in her system made it easy to come up with a comeback. "At least I don't pay mine to hang around me." She said, her voice laced with sarcasm, she still didn't turn to face him, she was frozen in place. Mai's, Maki's, Yuuji's and Nobara's eyes were wide and dancing between the two. There was for sure something going on here. Sukuna took a seat beside her casually draping an arm around the back of the sofa. "You're hurting my feelings doll, I'm not that bad" he spoke so softly, she almost got lost looking into his eyes. He looked way too good for her liking, same jewelry and eyeliner as the last time she saw him, his pink her strategically messed up, a silk black button down with the top two buttons undone, exposing his defined collarbones and the tattoos that extended to his chest and neck, black pants framing his thighs perfectly as he sat. Y/n was staring at this point, her friends were silent, taking in the image that was displayed before them. They had never seen y/n flustered or having difficulty forming words. Even Yuuji was surprised, seems like he was wrong about y/n's taste.

Sukuna was enjoying the look on her face a little more than he cared to admit, he would've taken his teasing further, but he didn't want to embarrass the girl anymore and her friends were already shocked. "Aren't you going to introduce me?" He asked her poking her cheek, and y/n could see Nobara was about to blow up.

"Right, Mai, Maki and Nobara this is Sukuna, he's um my tattoo artist?" What was she even supposed to say at this point? The guy she went on a date with and had the best make out session of her life?

Sukuna gave his hand out to the girls greeting them, he noticed his brother a few seats over who was concealing a laugh "you're here too brat" he briefly egnowledged him, Yuuji hummed back a hello in return, turning to Mai who was very eager to hear the details of y/n's and Sukuna's relationship, he sure as hell didn't look like just her tattoo artist.

"Tattoo artist? Really? you don't even have tattoos y/n" Nobara spoke, she just wanted her friend to be honest with her, if she had someone special, she could have said so, they've known each other for years. Sukuna wasn't surprised to hear that y/n hadn't shared that she got tattooed, he could tell she was a bit of a private person.

Y/n took off her jacket that she still had on from when she arrived, to show off the design to Maki and Nobara, Mai had already seen it and she was busy gossiping with Yuuji anyways. "Right, I forgot to tell you" she said, as Maki and Nobara scanned her upper arm with their eyes, so did Sukuna. He couldn't help himself, y/n looked so beautiful in his work. He wanted to cover every inch of her skin she was willing to give him, she could be his personal work of art, she already was one, but he wanted to decorate her in the best way he could and with the most beautiful art he could make. "That looks so beautiful" Maki spoke in awe, Nobara gave a little laugh "it's creepy, but it's really you. "

She took a look at Sukuna then back at y/n "It's very fitting, I don't know how to explain it." She continued.

Sukuna never took compliments that seriously, but hearing y/n's seemingly bitchy friend praise his work and the perception he had of her made him grin widely.

The four of them continued to speak, Maki and Nobara were very interested in Sukuna's line of work, Mai and Yuuji also took their turns in talking when they weren't too busy with one another. Y/n's friends were doing great with Sukuna, she thought he would be really difficult, he has a very explosive personality. Sukuna was putting in all the effort to make a good impression, both to y/n and the ones around her.

"So, did you miss me that much you came to find me?" Y/n asked once the attention was taken off of them. Mai looked to be having a deep conversation with Yuuji whereas Maki and Nobara got up to dance. "And if I did?" Sukuna spoke, his face dangerously close to hers, when did he manage to get hip to hip with her? Then again y/n had grown so comfortable around him, she didn't notice.

"Well, if that's the case, I'm glad you did come." She replied, Sukuna could tell she was a bit tipsy, else he would be making out with her on that sofa not caring who was watching.

Y/n poured herself another drink, thank god she didn't have to get up to get a refill, but Sukuna's voice stopped her movements. "Maybe you should ease up there" he said watching her fill two cups.

Y/n raised a brow at him "since where are you a party pooper? come on it ain't a party without a drink" her voice was playful as she tried passing one cup to him. Sukuna liked this y/n too, she was a bit more giggly, she smiled a bit more, "I'm driving sweetheart". Y/n was satisfied with his answer and proceeded to gulp down on both the cups she filled before Sukuna could stop her. She laughed pointing at him with her tongue out "too slow". Sukuna could only smile and pat her head. She was something else.

Somewhere along the night, Maki and Nobara disappeared and so did Yuuji and Mai. "You better tell your brother to take good care of my friend" y/n's state was getting worse, or more hilarious, it depended on how you looked at it. Sukuna would straight up laugh with some of the things she said, and he was trying his best to keep all forms of alcohol away from her, for her own good. "I don't think you should worry, Yuuji is much better than me in these kinds of things." He replied honestly, but y/n didn't necessarily see it like that. "There's no way he's that smooth" she trailed, the corners of her lips tugging upward. "Well if I didn't know any better, I'd say you liked me, didn't you think I was a dick?" Sukuna asked "Still do" her smile only grew wider.

One thing was for sure, y/n was very demanding when drunk, Sukuna left her side for the first time all night to get her some water, cause she felt 'like SpongeBob under that lamp drying out'. Not even slightly bothered by her request, Sukuna was on his way back to her, that's when he saw some guy standing infront of her trying to talk to her. Y/n even in her not very conscious state didn't tolerate people who didn't respect her "Just one song, come on it won't hurt, you're alone after all" the guy, y/n didn't care to catch the name of said "look, I don't dance, not unless the company is worth it, and I'm here with someone, leave me alone, this is getting annoying" Sukuna observed laughing to himself. He didn't feel the need to intervene yet. Y/n didn't like getting bossed around that's for sure, nor did she need a knight in shining armour to protect her, not that he would mind doing that. Sukuna casually sat down beside her again, ignoring the guy who was still standing there for some reason. That irritated him, it was enough that he tried to make a move on her, but not leaving while he was right there rubbed him the wrong way, "Here you go sweetheart" He said handing her the glass, praying that she won't drop and break it, he threw a glare at the guy who finally took the hint and left. "Thank you 'kuna." Y/n spoke, in a tone totally different from the one she had moments ago.

The nickname alone made his heart jump. Gojo was quite annoying when he called him that, but hearing the same word rolling out of y/n's tongue was completely different. Sukuna couldn't tell why he was feeling that way, he didn't care though, all he knew was that even the air smelled sweeter, when he was around her.

"You don't dance unless the company is good?" He asked, genuinely curious "well yes, if I feel comfortable I'll dance, but I don't really do it that much" she said, eyes heavy looking all over Sukuna's frame. " I see, how about we dance?" Sukuna suggested, he rarely danced himself, y/n made him want to get out of his comfort zone, hell he's already at a house party thanks to her.

"Only if you take some shots with me." She smilled at him malevolently. "You're playing dirty, who's going to take you home if I'm drunk?" Sukuna just wanted to hear her drunken logic "It probably takes a bottle for you to get drunk, you're clumsy, drunk or not, you're probably going to kill me if I get in your car".

Sukuna was full blown laughing, but she was right, her head was still not gone, she could walk and talk fine, she was just more talkative and cheerful, couple of shots wouldn't hurt, he could walk her home after since she lived close by, he remembered the way and then walk back home himself. She also gave him the cutest look he'd ever seen, how could he deny her?

"Ok you win" he raised his hands in defeat and y/n couldn't be happier. She poured 4 shots for them, which they quickly consumed and they were off to dance.

She never pictured him as a dancer, y/n saw Sukuna as the very cool looking dude standing on the bar, probably drinking whiskey with a bit of ice.

Looks can be deceiving, Sukuna was spinning her around, their bodies were pressed together, guiding each other to the beat. Eyes were meeting, body heat was exchanged, they fit like puzzle pieces even like this. Y/n kept looking at the exposed skin of his neck, why did he have to look like that and be this close, her face only grew warmer once her eyes met his and then dropped to his lips. Its not that Sukuna didn't want to kiss her, he would most certainly prefer her to be sober and remember it clearly the next day.

Those last two shots y/n had, in addition to Sukuna's body against hers, made her vision a bit blurry and her knees weak. "Hey doll, everything ok? You with me?" He shook her lightly by the shoulders, he could tell she was growing tired and he noticed how her demeanor changed. "Mhm, I'm sleepy 'kuna" there she goes again, making his heart skip beats. Y/n would be giving him so much shit had she realised she made him feel like that. "Ok then, how about we take you home ?" Sukuna's voice was so mellow, almost like he was talking to a toddler.

He guided her out of the crowded house, Todo was nowhere to be found, so Sukuna couldn't really let him know he was leaving.

Y/n was leaning on him, walking slowly down the street towards her place, but she abruptly stopped and sat down.

"What's wrong?" Sukuna asked, his sound as mellow as before. She was down right adorable, sitting there with a pout of her face .

"My feet hurt" y/n complained, dramatically throwing her arms around, if it was any other person Sukuna would've droped them to fend for themselves. "Really? That's sad" he replied, dropping down to her level, she only nodded, women's shoes are the most uncomfortable thing in the world. Sukuna scooped her up in his arms and carried her bridal style the rest of the way, he couldn't have her complaining and it wasn't like she would remember much either. With her arms wrapped securely around his neck, y/n could feel the warmth creeping up her neck all the way up to her ears, she didn't see the satisfied smile Sukuna wore.

Today went a lot better than he expected. So well that the tiredness got to y/n before they reached her apartment. Sukuna watched as she fell asleep in his arms. What a strange girl, she had both shyness and attitude, she was dancing her heart out no more than 15 minutes ago yet she still managed to fall asleep as he carried her.

Reaching her building, luckily the main entrance was unlocked. Sukuna took a peek at her, he couldn't bring himself to wake her up, she looked so peaceful, but unfortunately he had to. "Hey, which floor are you on?" He whispered softly, that was enough to shake y/n awake. "Third" she whispered back. Sukuna took the elevator up, and he finally reached her hallway, he only wished she didn't get her floor wrong or it would look like he was trying to break into someone else's house. "Doll, can you point your door for me? I'll put you down for a bit, where are your keys?" Y/n pointed at her door, handed Sukuna her keys and groaned as he set her down to unlock it for her. "You're such a brat" he pointed out swinging the door open, her annoyed face looked even cutter under the barely lit hallway.

Lord knows how Sukuna managed to find the light switches in the dark but he made it, y/n looked completely out of it now. He picked her back up and tried a few doors to find her bedroom. He gently layed her on the mattress. Y/n groaned again and said something about being uncomfortable. Of course she was uncomfortable, with her clothes still on from going out, there's no way she wasn't.

He shouldn't care right? He should just let her be and go home, but Sukuna could already tell she would have an awful nights sleep and he wanted her to rest properly. "Were do you keep sleep clothes" he asked, y/n pointed lazily at some drawer. After briefly digging in the drawer, he took out a pair of sweat pants and a hoodie for her.

He reached her frame again, undoing her shoes, sliding them off, next he prompted y/n with her side resting on the headboard so he could have her sit up with her legs dangling of the side of her bed. His hands found the rim of her shirt, her voice stopped him "don't look ok?" Her voice was hardly above a whisper. "I won't look"

"Promise?" She asked holding out her pinky

"promise" he stated locking it.

Sukuna averted his eyes from her body and helped her into her comfy clothes. Only one thing remained "Now come on time to get your makeup off"

"Nooo, I want to sleep" she complained loudly, dropping her body backwards on the bed. "Come on, it's not good for your skin, it will just be a minute, just be good for me" he said grabbing her hand, but y/n turned her head away. That's when Sukuna threw her over his shoulder, the most she could do was weakly hit his back and tell at him to put her down.

Sukuna sat her somewhere in her bathroom, while she still mumbled about being sleepy. He got a washcloth wet, and took a look at the products in her cabinet, she surely had an oil cleanser he just had to find it... bingo.

He pushed her hair out of the way and gently applied and massaged the product on to her skin, giving her instructions to keep her eyes and mouth close, he was extra careful not to cut her with his nails, then he used the washcloth to remove all the make-up that melted off. Sukuna also wore liner, not all the time but often enough to know that some things didn't come off with soap and water. He takes care of himself, his skin, his hair, his nails, everything. He knows a bit more than he's willing to share. Next he followed the same steps with her cleaner, y/n was enjoying herself, half asleep under his touch. He finished everything by applying a serum and a moisturizer on her face. "You've got the cheap stuff." He joked. "Hey it works" y/n defended as he picked her up once more.

This time he layed her under the covers, he pulled them up over her body, looking at her with plain adoration, he leaned down to press a kiss on her forehead.

"Sleep tight, I'll text you." He whispered in her ear, turning around to leave. A hand tugged oh his wrist, the same way he had done to her a couple days ago. Y/n was looking at him with pleading eyes "please stay" she almost begged, "are you sure? Its really late" he said, y/n nodded patting the spot beside her, he couldn't say no to those eyes. He quickly got rid of his shoes and dress shirt, he disappeared to the bathroom to take off his eyeliner and got under the covers with her.

Y/n curled up next to him, laying her head on his chest, taking in all his warmth and scent while listening to his heartbeat, his arm was wrapped securely around her.

" Can I ask you something?" Y/n's voice broke the silence. "Didn't you want to sleep?" Sukuna teased, and y/n took the opportunity to ask anyway. "Why do you like me?" What kind of question is this? Sukuna blamed the fact that she was a bit out it. She had no reason to be insecure, she was stunning and she also had a personality to back up her looks. "Let's see... you're kind of a badass, no one really talks back to me like you do, you're quite easy on the eyes too" what he said was very true, but he was falling for the little details too. The way she picked mindlessly at her food as she talked when he took her out, or the way her eyes sparkled when something peaked her interest. Even her drunken self had him feeling things he never did.

"How come you were single? Judging by your friends it's been a while" The words came out of his mouth before he could stop them, but y/n didn't give any signs of being bothered by his assumption. "Honestly, I don't want someone to fall out of love and leave me behind" Drunken words are sober thoughts. Sukuna didn't want to ask if that had happened to her before, he didn't care, he would do better than whoever hurt her.

More moments passed with him rubbing comforting circles on her back, he was sure she was asleep, her breath was slow and steady against his chest. "I wonder, what would you say if I asked you to be mine?" Sukuna whispered, staring up at her ceiling. "I'd say yes, airhead" y/n mumbled. Sukuna's eyes widened, she wasn't supposed to hear that. "I'll make sure to ask you soon then" he said, y/n looked up at him, this time he couldn't help himself and captured her lips in his, in a very slow passionate kiss. It didn't last long but it was enough to keep y/n's head spinning around with him running through it. "Sleep already, brat"

"okay 'kuna".

The light coming in, beaming through her curtains, woke y/n from a very peaceful sleep, now all she felt was the vodka she consumed the night before. Her head was pounding hard, she reached for her phone on her nightstand. Instead of her phone, her hand made contact with a piece of paper.

Good morning doll.

You're most definitely feeling like shit, but don't worry you didn't do anything too embarrassing. Unfortunately I had to go to work early and you looked cute sleeping, I didn't want to wake you. There are pain killers next to you, you must have a hell of a headache. Don't forget to eat, I made breakfast for you in the kitchen (with all I could manage to find, you should go grocery shopping more often). Text me or I might think you died in your sleep. Have a wonderful day y/n.

- Sukuna

PS I took a peek in one of your notebooks. I was right, your handwriting is really fucking bad.

Of course he had to be his usual smug self, y/n found herself laughing at the words scribbled on the paper that was obviously ripped out of one of her notebooks. His handwriting was as pretty as his drawings, so aesthetically pleasing. He had even taken time to doodle coffee cups, and some trees at the bottom of the page.

The events from the previous night were starting to flood back to her head head. She took the pain killers Sukuna left out for her, he was kind enough to place a glass of water on her nightstand too. Y/n couldn't believe Sukuna not only stayed over, but he also put in so much effort for her, he certainly didn't look like the type to do so.

Walking in her kitchen, what she witnessed, exceeded all her expectations. When she read breakfast she thought he made her a sandwich, which she would've been extremely grateful for. Sukuna had gone all out, from pancakes, to French toast, an omelet and even her coffee served. She just stood there looking at her table, mouth almost hanging.

Her phone buzzed in the pocket of her sweat pants.

You should've told me you were going out with Yuuji's hot brother. I would've never guessed that's your type.

Mai seemed to be in a mood to tease her.

You're right I should've told you, your turn, where did you and Yuuji run off to last night?

Y/n laughed knowing it was going to take a while to get a response. She sat down looking at all the choices she had, wondering what to pick. It's safe to say everything was as delicious as Sukuna.

I'm impressed. You draw, you cook AND you didn't burn down my house, I'm very thankful for that (breakfast was delicious too).

Sukuna, stared down at his phone, all the stress he had two nights ago long forgotten. Only thing that remained was to get y/n right back in his chair.

Happy to hear you're alive and kicking and you enjoy my cooking. I've got to go through, some dickbag wants me to do a cover-up. I'll talk to you later.

He dealt with this client in an unusually polite manner. Y/n had brighten his morning from the moment he woke up next to her.

Bonus Domain shenanigans: "Yuuji was right, I had to push him" Geto said to an agitated Gojo, who wanted to get under Sukuna's skin for a little longer. "Then hopefully he will bring her over, that would for sure be fun, he's going to get so worked up if we give her any attention." Gojo was rubbing his hands together at the thought. "I don't think that's a good idea. I'm not that worried about what Sukuna will do to you, we've both seen y/n, she doesn't even take his shit, I think she'd hit you." Nanami pointed out ."Well I haven't yet seen her, Yuuji said she was nice to him." Megumi joined the conversation remembering his friend talking about the girl, he had zoned out for half of it though. "I haven't seen her either, I did hear her though, she doesn't sound like she would let you pull something like that to him" Geto spoke again. "Nah she looked friendly, we can for sure make him foam at the mouth" Gojo plotted. "I can guarantee, she will rip of your head of if you try your shit." Sukuna was sure of it too.

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[rinstars]

𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 — 𝐬.𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮 (𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞)

pairing: suna rintarou x reader

genre/trope: angst, unrequited love, forbidden love

warnings: nsfw, profanity, infidelity, mentions of weed/drugs, intoxication

description: you knew you never meant to him as much as he meant to you.. yet deep down, you still hoped his heart also breaks with every single goodbye and the regrets of the past clings to him a lot more than he let you believe.

note: this is a repost of 'the call' where i changed and added a few things to make it fit as a prologue better, so make sure u still read it. i'll do this series at my own pace so please just be patient! i'll open the taglist so just send me an ask if you want to be tagged hehe.

The smell of leather and weed floating in the space surrounding you constricts your breathing, making you gasp for air – even more as he suctions the air out of you through your heated shared kiss, your lungs burning with the need for oxygen. But you ignore it. Running your fingers through his hair and meeting his hunger with kisses equally as rough, you ignore the building pain on your chest.

You rock your hips towards him, feeling his hard crotch rub you through the lace of the panties you bought just a few days ago. Pulling away for a moment only to gasp on his reddening plump lips while he lazily guides your movements on his lap, triggering a flood of pleasure wash over you.

Slender, pale, and long fingers reached over to snatch another blunt, taking a long drag before the very same fingers of the opposite hand takes the back of your neck so he can pull you closer to his lips. He breathes the smoke out of his mouth into yours, connecting your lips once again.

Despite the distinct scent of the drug, you taste a tinge of sweetness on your tongue as his own massages yours. Rocking your hips harder to his forces a moan out of you, making your fingers curl around his lengthy hair. You pull away, muttering a small give me a minute to him. Leaning back on the steering wheel, you watch him while you try to control your ragged breathing.

His hair is long. Long enough that it falls softly all the way to his eyes and cheeks, the ends brushing his really pale skin. With your earlier statement, he just shrugged with the same unchanging look of nonchalance in his eyes—proceeding to take drags out of his blunt. His beautifully shaped eyes now bloodshot and shiny with moisture.

He's almost like a vampire, now that you think about it. So beautiful. Such pale skin but such dark hair. Sharp gaze but soft lips. Intoxicating scent but still so sweet.

The most similar thing between him and vampires, you thought, is the way he sucks all the life out of you. Drying you out and taking all your light.

This man has corrupted you more than you're willing to admit.

You opened your mouth to say something when the blaring ring of his phone makes you jump. His eyes glanced over the source before grabbing it with a sigh and scanning the monitor. You didn't even need to ask who it is. You're very well aware who it is, and why he never hesitated to answer.

When it comes to you, it always takes a lot of rings and missed calls before he picks up, though. You understand. You tell him you do, you always will.

He doesn't pick a call up on the first ring unless it's his girl. Astumu whispered as if he heard you ponder about the caller in your head one night when you were drinking with him in a bar. Loves her a lot. Probably too much.

The alarms rang in your head that night, no matter how much you tried to ignore it. So annoying but at the same time so painful. You didn't know how to turn it off and you wish every single time you could.

"Darling," He whispered with such a loving voice, one you never heard from him when he answers your calls. Your heart ached but you knew better than to confront him about it. Instead you cry in the arms of the twinss—more on Atsumu's, since Osamu takes you through an hour long lecture of why you should have known better.

You know that much, you think.

You shouldn't have let yourself get dragged in this stupid situation, craving a taken man and his touches. Letting him in on your secrets even when he barely lets you get a peak in his.

"I miss you too, my love.. Oh?.. I'll be home soon." He speaks in pauses as he lets her finish speaking first. You close your eyes to prevent the liquid threatening to spill out, taking a deep breath before slowly lifting yourself from his lap to the passenger seat. His eyes widened a millimeter—almost as if he cares what you do, when he noticed you getting off him without having to tell you. You noticed he ended his call with her and you refuse to look back at him. If you do, you are sure of another sleepless night.

Another sleepless night of asking yourself what went wrong and if he ever regretted his decisions— maybe he, too, spend the night wide awake asking himself why he brushed off every single detail of the past like it never existed, why he acts like you're a stranger he met for the very first time when both of you coincidentally takes the seat next to each other on a bar, why he never gave you an explanation of what happened that day.

Cold fingers hook under your chin, slowly turning your head to the left. He leans over the center console, connecting his lips with the soft skin of your neck, making you exhale out at the feeling of him sucking all the reason in you again. He runs his tongue wet on your collarbones, creating a glistening trail.

"I'll see you soon?" He whispered on the crook of your neck, nibbling it a little with his teeth. The bruises he leave on your skin another reminder that everything is real.

You just hum with a nod, cupping his jaw and slowly pulling him away from you with a small smile. One of his bangs fell in the middle of his face—you reached up to brush it away.

So many unspoken words from you. Too many. You wonder if he has anything he's holding back to say too as his eyes linger on you a second longer than usual. Or maybe you're just desperately reading into the lines again, like what Osamu said way too many times.

"Rin, what.. what are we?" Every parting is like this, like a new way of saying goodbye that you both developed. You just needed to be reminded, to wake up from whatever delusions you're starting to have.

"Nothing." He replies as flatly as all the other times before. Not a hint of emotion – no amusement or remorse.

You swallow, letting your hands fall to your sides. On the verge of turning around and reaching the door, his voice echoes once again. "How many times are you gonna ask me this?"

Until you start feeling something.

You thought to yourself. Anger, disgust, love, hatred, adoration, anything. You just want him to feel something. Prove to yourself and everyone else that you're not just a tool to him.

"Sorry. Slipped out of habit." You settle for that response now. No point having a conversation with him about this.

"You don't have to leave right away, I can still drive you home."

Losing all the strength to refuse, you found yourself just agreeing with him. Why the fuck are you even so upset to begin with? You knew what you signed up for. You knew about the girl. You saw him with her in the very same bar a few nights ago. Watched how much attention he gives her, how tightly he holds her.

Of course, you knew about the girl. Your past with her woven in a way no one will be able to deny, and she knows it too, as much as Suna and the twins do. How could you forget? Everything to you was clear as day, from the very first day to the last. Rintarou knows it hurts you more this way, but he never bothers to hide it from you—how he chose her over you.

"I'll break your heart by the end of this, baby." He warns you as you feel his length slip inside you, making you moan out in ecstasy.

"I don't care." You pant, grabbing him by the hips as a way of telling him to go faster.

Looking back, maybe you shouldn't have been so foolish and say that. Now, you're paying the price. Now, your exit has been sealed.

The moment you met him, you forgot everything – your reason, pride, dignity, loyalty, sense, self-love. You hate how intoxicates you like the drugs on his backseat and yet you can't stop. You wonder if he knows how you feel about him—how you still feel about him. If he notices the way your eyes would light up when you see him or the way you would wrap your arms so tightly like you're afraid of letting him go.

The car stopped soon after and you looked out the window to find yourself in front of your house. You collected your things and fastened the clasp on your sandals then opened the door, stepping a foot outside when he once again stops you by the wrist.

"I'll call you soon. I promise."

"I'll be waiting." You wriggle out of his grip without looking back, stepping your remaining foot out to join with the other as you stand up to leave. "Take care, Rintarou."

"You too, baby." The sound of his tires grow fainter by the second as he speeds off to his and his girlfriend's shared apartment and it was so loud, you couldn't tell if there was a strain on his voice when he said that or if you just imagined it again in your head.

You didn't notice the sobs wrecking your body. Not until you feel warm droplets fall to your open palms in front of you. You clutched your phone tightly, holding it to your chest.

You can only hope the next call comes soon, interrupting the continuous flow of the songs on your phone—the very records that remind you of what you never had—or perhaps, if things went a different turn; what you could've had with him.

[goldenretriever-nicknelson]

Vacation Part 2 ~ Prague [P.P]

Series Masterlist || Main Masterlist

A/n: Chapter 2 is here! I'm still working on 3 and I'll hopefully have it done in time for next week. I'm so grateful for the response from this small series and I'm excited that you all like it! This chapter has more angst in it and yes I was slightly inspired by To all the boys I've loved before haha.

Thank you to @eeyore101247 for beta reading this chapter for me at the last minute! I love you Lolo!

WC: 5.8k

Warnings: Angst, mentions of slut-shaming and bullying, high school sucks, mentions of Tony and grief but also cute romantic fluff cause we love to see it.

The end of the class’ time in Italy arrived too soon in Peter’s opinion. He’d had so much fun with you, he’d almost forgotten entirely about his plan. Almost. There was still a part of him drawn to MJ and still felt jealous when she was with Brad which started to happen more often.

And yet he always felt himself drawn back to you.

Peter sighed as he finished packing his bags, his head reeling from everything until he heard a knock on the door. Mostly everyone had left the hotel in a hurry but Ned had stayed with Peter.

“You got a package.” He handed Peter the wrapped package and looked at him with a furrowed brow. “Do you think it’s a bomb or something?”

Peter looked at his best friend in bewilderment. “Well I do now!”

“I’m sure it’s not.” Ned shook his head, eying the package carefully. Peter cautiously looked at Ned and back at the parcel in his hands. He knew this vacation had been too good to be true. He carefully looked at the writing and noticed a shield logo in the corner.

“It’s from SHIELD.” Peter spoke carefully as he opened the wrapping, he was hoping maybe for a cool badge or something but instead there was only a glasses case. Ned and him exchanged a look before opening the case.

There inside of the wooden casing was a pair of glasses, they looked mostly ordinary with a blue shaded tint to the lenses like the kind Tony would wear. Peter felt a strange kind of feeling as he looked at them, it was a mix of grief and disappointment, are these old glasses really the only thing Tony had left for him?

“Awesome!” Ned looked over Peter’s shoulder at the glasses. “Try them on!”

Peter thought about it before quickly closing the case and putting it in his backpack, shaking his head. “We’ll be late for the flight.”

“Oh you didn’t hear?” Ned gave Peter a look who shrugged in return. “We’re going by coach now. Mr Harrington said we got an upgrade to Prague.”

“What about Paris?!” Peter exclaimed, looking at Ned with wide eyes.

“Well Mr Harrington and Mr Dell kind of got into an argument about whether it was Prague or Paris we were meant to be going to. Turns out Mr Harrington was supposed to book Paris but he booked Prague instead.” Ned explained, shaking his head.

Peter sighed and furrowed his brow, a coach didn’t sound much fun but at least Peter didn’t have to worry about flying. He wasn’t sure if there were any romantic spots in Prague but it was nothing a quick internet search couldn’t fix. It’s not like his plan was going according anyway.

He grabbed his bags and walked down to where the rest of the class were already boarding a large coach.

Everyone was already seated by the time Peter got on. MJ was with Brad, Ned was with Betty and you were with one of your friends. The only free seat was next to Flash and Peter preferred the option of sitting by himself at the back, he could do with the peace and quiet anyway.

You gave him a smile as he walked past and he returned it before taking his seat, almost falling into it as the driver started down the road. Peter rested his head against the window and took out his earphones, noticing the case next to them. He played his music as he took out the case and looked at the glasses again.

He picked them up and tried them on, waiting for something to happen but nothing did. He laughed dryly and shook his head, going to take them off before he noticed a Stark industries business card at the bottom of the case.

For the next Tony Stark, I trust you. Say EDITH.

Peter read the message aloud and jumped as the glasses flashed blue, a female voice talking to him much like the one he had in his suit. An interface loaded in front of him, showing a scan of his face.

“Retinal and biometric scan completed.”

“Hello?”

“Hello Peter. I am EDITH, Tony Stark’s augmented reality security and defence system.”

Peter adjusted the glasses and smiled, Tony had given him an AI with access to all of his protocols. He almost couldn’t believe that he had trusted him with that kind of access.

“EDITH stands for even dead I’m the hero. Tony loved his acronyms.”

“Yeah he did.” Peter smiled fondly, remembering the time he had tried to make up some of his own but had never quite hit the mark.

“I have access to the entire Stark global security network including multiple defence satellites and backdoors to all major telecommunication networks.”

Peter looked around as screens loaded before him of what his classmates and teachers were up to on their phones including Mr Dell researching the history of witchcraft. Ned and Betty were texting each other even though they were sat together.

“Woah.” Peter couldn’t get over how cool this was to have all of this access at his fingertips. He looked over at MJ wondering if she was texting before changing his mind, knowing it would be wrong. His eyes landed on where you sat and your texts showed before him. Ned wasn’t the only one Betty was texting.

Y/n: I really like him.

Betty: I know but I’m pretty sure he likes MJ :/

Peter could feel his heart racing. He wanted so badly to tell you Betty was wrong but the truth was he didn’t know anymore.

You looked over at MJ and Brad, biting your lip before glancing at Peter. He quickly looked away from you, his eyes looking over towards MJ on accident. He didn’t see the way your face fell but he did see the last text you sent to Betty.

Y/n: Yeah, you’re right.

Peter sighed and put his head in his hands, wanting to scream into oblivion.

“Pete, everything okay?”

He quickly looked up at the sound of your voice and nodded, worrying that somehow you knew he had been spying. He tried to quickly think of something to say as you sat next to him, looking worried and saddened.

A moment’s silence passed between the both of you, neither sure of what to say. The only sound came from the chatters of the bus and the passing scenery outside.

“I like your glasses. Are they new?” You smiled, breaking the silence as you admired the new frames and the eyes underneath them. Peter slowly nodded and took them off.

“Y-yeah, they were a gift.” He gave you a small smile and put them back in the case. You noticed the Stark industries logo but didn’t say anything more on the topic. You knew how much Tony had meant to Peter.

After the blip when everyone returned to their old lives, you noticed Peter wasn’t the same person. He seemed sadder and lost, struggling to pay attention even in lessons he loved and sometimes he’d have to excuse himself quickly from the classroom. You had followed him once and found him on the floor, sobbing into his hands. He didn’t even register it was you that had hugged him until he looked up and mumbled an apology.

Seeing him that way broke your heart and the last thing you wanted to cause was more sadness for him when he was meant to be enjoying himself.

“I think they look good on you.”

Peter blushed and smiled, bowing his head shyly. “Thank you.”

You smiled back and nodded, deciding to listen to your music and handing Peter an earphone. He looked surprised at the gesture but took it anyway and listened to your music, a wide smile gracing his lips as you both shared the sweet moment together.

It stayed like that for the rest of the journey, both of you enjoying each other's company just as you had done in Venice. Peter couldn't get rid of the smile from his face until they stopped for a restroom break and he saw Brad and MJ holding hands as they got off the bus. His whole face fell which didn't go unnoticed by you.

Peter gave you a quick goodbye before going after Ned, in need of his best friend’s advice. You meekly said a goodbye before sighing and grabbing your things. Your eyes landed on a small journal on Peter’s seat that he must have left behind.

You know you shouldn’t have looked but the temptation was biting away at you. It was only just a peek, you told yourself. You smiled as you saw some doodles scribbled on the pages, chemical equations for something called web fluid (probably some cool science thing he was working on) and a section dedicated to The plan.

Intrigued of what the plan entailed you read ahead and with each written word the jealousy in your heart grew and the sadness broke your heart. Peter was planning to romance MJ with gifts and a whole speech he had written out in detail. Everything was planned and you were nothing more than a distraction. You even noticed that in one of Peter’s doodles he had written MJ or Y/n???

*~*~*~*

“I swear it was in here.” Peter sighed as he searched his bag for his journal, the one that held all his personal thoughts and feelings. Ned had tried to help him look but the mission was futile.

“It will turn up. Maybe you just left it on the bus.”

Peter nodded and sighed heavily, zipping his backpack up and throwing it back on his shoulders. He spotted a nice little souvenir for Morgan and paid for it before leaving the small store. He took a moment to look around where they had stopped since the rest of the group were taking their time and as he got closer to a small empty bathroom he could hear the sound of someone crying.

He gently knocked on the door to make sure that whoever it was was okay before being sharply told to go away. Peter felt even worse as he recognised your voice. He wondered what had happened since she’d been fine when he last saw her.

“y/n?”

“Peter just leave me alone, please.” Your voice cracked as you spoke, small sniffles escaping you as you sat on the edge of the closed toilet seat.

“You know I can’t do that.” He rested his head against the door and sighed softly, willing to wait for you until you came out.

“I’m trying to make things easier for you!”

Peter hummed in confusion before something slid out from underneath the door, his journal.

“Go be with MJ.”

“Y/n no..” He sighed and resisted the urge to bang his head against the door. “I-” He didn’t even know how to explain but he did know one thing. “It doesn’t matter what it says in there. I’ve had so much fun with you on this trip and I know now that you can’t plan everything, you can’t plan falling in love because it just happens.”

As Peter spoke he realised that his words were truer than they had ever been, he was falling for you and he couldn’t stop himself. He didn’t want to stop. He didn’t care about his plan anymore and yes it still hurt when MJ was with Brad but it was nothing compared to the happiness he felt when he was with you.

The world felt silent around the both of you as Peter’s words processed. You felt even more confused than before but you could also feel something else, hope. Peter listened to your breathing and the small sniffles that still came from behind the door.

“I’m gonna head back onto the bus. I got cookies if you wanna share.”

You held back a giggle and rolled your eyes fondly before opening the bathroom door and wiping your eyes free of tears.

“They better be chocolate chip.”

“Is there any other kind?”

You and Peter both laughed as you got back on the bus, already heading to the back together to find your seats. Peter put his journal away out of sight and smiled at you, taking out the cookies he had brought and offering one to you. It did nothing to ease the ache still in your heart but it did fill your stomach and no matter what you still liked being in Peter’s company.

*~*~*~*

The hotel for Prague turned out to be a lot better than the one they had stayed in during their time in Venice. Mr Harrington said that an anonymous someone had given them an upgrade which made Peter’s Spidey senses tingle. Maybe he was just being paranoid but he also knew that things like this were usually too good to be true.

Everyone was shown to their room, all except for Peter who got held back at reception by the lady at the desk.

“He said to leave this here for you when you arrived Mr Parker.”

Peter looked at her with confusion as he took the envelope, a familiar handwriting scrawled on top. His heart suddenly felt heavy but he pushed the resurfacing feelings of grief aside and nodded, making his way up to his room.

He could hear through the door that Ned and Betty were already inside making cutesy talk while soft music played. Whilst Peter loved his friends, he wanted to go somewhere quiet and open the letter. His mind had already decided where to go as he made his way towards the room number he needed and knocked.

The door opened to reveal your beautiful smile which already made Peter feel a sense of calm. He looked around for your suit buddy and sighed in relief as the room was empty.

“Can I come in?”

You nodded without hesitation, seeing the slight pain on Peter’s face and brought him to sit down on one of the comfy twin beds. He held the letter in slightly shaky hands and kept his eyes on it. You spotted the familiar logo on the envelope, the same that was on Peter’s glasses case and realised.

“Is that from-?”

“Mhm.” Peter nodded, keeping his lips in a tight thin line as he contemplated opening it. His mind was running a mile a minute with so many thoughts. He’d gotten the glasses from Tony and that was enough for him even if the card had been a bit of a riddle. He wasn’t sure if he could handle a letter too.

“Can you open it?” Peter looked at you pleadingly as he handed you the letter, his hands still visibly shaking. You hesitated before nodding and carefully opened the envelope, reading the letter aloud.

Dear Peter,

I’m writing this in case all goes well and we manage to restore normality, at least what once was. I know you’re going to do great things and maybe you’ll make mistakes along the way but that’s part of being human kid. God knows I made more than I can count.

I wanted to make your senior year as awesome as it should be so if you’re reading this then you made it kid. I don’t remember much of my last year of high school but I wanted to make sure you did so make the most of it and don’t worry about any extracurriculars on your trip.

I know you’ll make me proud Peter cause you already do. Now go have fun and don’t do anything I would do or anything I wouldn’t do. Remember the little grey area is where you operate.

Anonymous someone.

Peter laughed and sniffled as you finished, wiping his eyes as tears had started to fall. You quickly put the letter down and wrapped your arms around him, hugging him close.

“It’s okay.”

He nodded against your shoulder as a few more tears fell, his fingers clinging onto your sweater. Peter wasn’t sure whether to smile or cry more at the words from his mentor so he did both. He reread the letter again and again that night, feeling the weight on his heart ease. Tony had upgraded his class trip for him probably through Happy to make sure Peter had a nice time and he had also said he was proud of him. That hit Peter the most and it was what he needed to hear in that moment.

You both stayed like that for a few minutes as Peter’s breathing calmed, his tears reducing to sniffles. You rubbed his back comfortingly and played with his curls which seemed to relax Peter more as he stayed in your arms.

When you both pulled away neither was sure of what to say. Peter focused on clearing his face of tears and running a hand through his messy curls whilst you played with the sleeves of your sweater. You wished you could ask Peter to stay the night, after all your roommate for the trip had gone home with food poisoning.

Little did you know Peter was thinking the same thoughts, knowing Ned and Betty would probably still be in his room or go to hers. Sometimes they spooned and stayed up till late hours of the night talking, he wasn’t sure he could deal with that right now and he liked being in your company.

“Do you want to-?”

“Can I-?”

You both laughed as you spoke over each other, exchanging a back and forth argument of who should speak first. Peter insisted you speak and gave you a small smile.

You nodded and took a deep breath before looking into those familiar warm, honey coloured eyes. “Do you want to stay here tonight? There’s two beds and I heard there’s a Star Wars Marathon on tv.”

Peter’s smile widened, his eyes crinkling with happiness as he nodded. “I’d love to.”

The night passed by in a blur as you and Peter stayed up to watch his favourite movies, even having ordered some food from room service which had apparently also been covered by Stark industries. Just like in Venice, you laughed and joked and enjoyed each other’s company, smiling as you saw Peter enjoying himself.

There was still a hurt from earlier knowing how much he had wanted to be with MJ and you knew they would work together as a couple, you’d seen them in decathlon together but MJ seemed to be enjoying time with Brad and Peter was here with you. A warm flutter of butterflies exploded in your stomach as you met his gaze, he offered his warm smile and offered you some of his popcorn to which you nodded.

Maybe your chance wasn’t so dead after all.

Just as you were about to wind down for the night, it being way past midnight, Peter looked at you with a hesitant smile.

“Hey Y/n?”

You looked up at him in response, picking up some popcorn from your competition to see who could throw and catch the most in their mouths (Peter had won).

“I- um would you-” Peter stuttered over his words as they got caught on his tongue. He cleared his throat and you bit back a smile at how utterly cute he was. “There’s this big carnival tomorrow and I was hoping maybe w-we could go together?”

His cheeks flushed pink as he finally asked the question he’d been dying to ask all night, his eyes too scared to look at your reaction.

“Peter,” You walked over and cupped his cheeks, forcing him to look at you. He relaxed at seeing the wide smile on your face. “I would love to go with you.”

His smile widened to match yours and a wave of relief washed over him. “That’s great.” He gave a chuckle and blushed as you delicately kissed his cheek before getting into your bed for the night.

“Just to make sure I meant like a date.” Peter clarified, worried about getting put into the friendzone.

You giggled and smiled at him from your bed. “I know Pete. It’s a date.” You winked at him before turning off the light and laying back, ready to fall asleep with a wide smile on your face.

Peter smiled wide as he laid in bed, the sheets and mattress softer than the last one he had slept on. Everything finally seemed to be falling into place, it wasn’t as Peter had imagined but it was far better.

*~*~*~*~*~*

The next morning Peter woke up feeling more refreshed than he had felt in a long time. The sun was shining over Prague and even Peter felt brighter in himself. He looked over at your bed and smiled as he found you still asleep, snoring softly.

Peter’s whole heart leapt at the sight and he let out a happy sigh as he thought about last night. You had comforted him and held him and had even agreed to go on a date with him tonight. He felt like the luckiest human alive which made him want to do a little dance in his bed as he thought about it.

“What are you doing?”

Peter blushed and looked over to see that you were now awake and looking at him with an amused smile.

“Uh nothing.” He laughed and got out of bed, gathering the letter and his shoes. You giggled as you watched him accidentally grab your sneakers before switching them for his own. “I better get going. Don’t want Mr Harrington to call an emergency buddy meeting again.”

You laughed and agreed with a nod, remembering the last one at the airport when Mr Harrington had panicked the whole group when he thought Ned had gone missing only to see he was right behind him.

Peter smiled at you as he opened the door, “I’ll see you later?”

You nodded and smiled wide, “Don’t be late Parker.”

He shook his head and laughed as he left, an unwavering smile on his face as he headed back to his room. Peter didn’t notice Flash see him leave your room with a smile and his shoes in hand nor the phone recording him.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Peter took a deep breath as he stood in front of the mirror, brushing down his shirt as he bit his lip. “I’m not sure.”

Ned sighed and flopped back onto his bed. “Peter, this is the 7th shirt you’ve tried on! You look fine!” He knew as soon as he uttered the last word that Peter would rummage through his suitcase yet again for the perfect shirt.

10 minutes later, Peter was finally ready for his date, much to Ned’s relief. He watched as Peter gave himself a pep talk in the mirror, mumbling in the hopes Ned couldn’t hear him.

“Okay here’s the plan-”

Ned was just about to tell Peter enough with his plans before the door opened and MJ walked in.

“Hey losers.”

“Have you ever heard of knocking?” Ned looked at her and raised his brow. MJ shrugged in response and sat down on Peter’s vacant bed. She looked at him as he turned back to the mirror and tried to tame his messy curls.

“So you and Y/n huh?” MJ noted with a smirk, stealing some of the gummy worms that Peter had brought for the trip. He turned around so quickly, he almost got whiplash.

“What?! I-” Peter was at a loss for words, he knew news spread quickly at Midtown but how had anyone found out in one night. “We’re not really a thing yet.” He blushed and avoided his friends’ gazes.

“Oh really? Then why did Flash see you leave her room last night in the same clothes as yesterday.” MJ smirked again and threw a gummy worm at Peter who looked at her with wide eyes.

“I just- I stayed in her room last night.” He admitted, his cheeks burning red as Ned and MJ didn’t look convinced. “But nothing happened!”

Ned and MJ shared a sympathetic look as they saw Peter’s distress grow at the rumor. He picked up his phone and panicked as he saw the midtown gossip website showing a video of him leaving your room. Before he could panic anymore Peter quickly made his way to the other side of the hotel floor and banged on Flash’s door.

“Woah penis what-?”

“Take it down.” Peter didn’t disguise his anger as Flash opened the door.

“What?”

“The video you took last night Flash. Please take it down.” Peter lowered his voice and pleaded. He knew this would affect you as soon as you saw it and the last thing he wanted was for you to get hurt because of him. Not again.

“Why? Don’t want everyone to know you’re not a virgin anymore?” Flash smirked and laughed before noticing the anger grow once more on Peter’s face. “The video’s out of my control. Sorry dude.”

Flash closed the door, not sounding sorry at all. Peter sighed and leaned against the wall, resting his head back. Everywhere around him classmates were getting ready for the carnival, whispering behind his back and giving him looks, he wasn’t sure if they were impressed looks or disgusted ones but either way he didn’t like them.

Peter usually lied low so he could avoid things like this and stay out of the rumor mill. He hated rumors and he hated being a part of them even more. Just as he was contemplating messaging Happy to see if he could do something, he heard a door open and looked up.

You walked out of your room, looking as beautiful as ever and Peter swear his heart almost dropped out of his stomach at the sight as the butterflies ran rampant in his stomach. You looked around before catching his gaze and smiling.

“Hey Pete.”

For a moment, Peter forgot how to form words, too focused on how beautiful you looked as you smiled. His throat felt dry and his hands felt clammy to the touch.

“H-hi.” He finally managed to say, his heart racing as you smiled wider and giggled.

“I was just coming to meet you. Are you ready to go?”

Peter thought back to the video circulating his classmates phones and he assumed you hadn’t seen it. He knew he should’ve told you there and then but he didn’t want to ruin your date or hurt you so he kept his lips sealed.

He nodded and gave you a small smile, heading out of the hotel with you. Your hands touched briefly as you walked and Peter almost took your hand in his before pulling away as he chickened out. You tried not to show your disappointment and offered Peter a smile.

The streets of Prague were full of life and celebration, everyone wearing bright colours and dancing along the streets as loud music played. Peter allowed himself to be distracted at the joy of the city before your hand slipped into his, catching him by surprise.

You gave his hand a squeeze and smiled, “So we don’t lose each other.” It was partially the truth but you mostly just wanted to hold his hand. Peter smiled and nodded but you could tell something was wrong.

It wasn’t just the rumour mill that was getting to Peter, the loud noises and brightness was causing his heightened senses to overload. He began to feel on edge and his palms grew even sweatier than before.

“Peter are you okay?”

He looked at you and bit his lip, shaking his head slowly. You squeezed his hand comfortingly and nodded, seemingly understanding what needed to be done as you led him over to the Ferris wheel.

Peter sighed in relief as you and him both got seated, your hands still interlinked as the door shut to the cart you were in.

“I hate crowds too.” You admitted with a soft blush and met his gaze. Peter smiled softly and squeezed your hand like you had done to his.

The wheel moved slowly allowing you both to enjoy the moment and the sights of the city. Peter knew that he didn’t need to fill the silence or try to talk, you were just there for each other as you had been last night and the whole trip.

Music from the streets filled the silence of the night as you and Peter looked out at the stars glittering in the night sky. It was right as you reached the peak of the wheel that Peter finally broke the silence.

“I really like you Y/n.”

You blushed and turned to Peter, noticing the redness of his cheeks and the staggered breaths escaping his lips. He looked straight ahead for a few moments before he felt your hand grip tighter onto his and saw your smile from the corner of his eye.

“I really like you too Peter.”

He smiled wide, mirroring yours before noticing your face fall just as fast.

“But I don’t want to be second best.”

Peter’s heart broke at her words, knowing she was thinking back to his journal. He shook his head and quickly cupped your cheeks in his hands, meeting your gaze lovingly.

“You’re not second best Y/n. You never were and you never will be. The truth is I’ve always liked you but I just- I never thought I would be lucky enough to have a chance with you.”

You smiled at the genuinity in Peter’s voice and his warm brown eyes that pulled you in ever closer until your lips were almost touching. “Always liked me huh?”

Peter nodded and smiled wide, the blush on his cheeks becoming brighter as he looked down at your lips.

“C-can I kiss you?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

You smiled as Peter’s lips finally met your own, after years of pining and wondering what if. Peter’s lips were soft and tasted like the cotton candy you had shared earlier. Your lips were sweeter than Peter had ever imagined, if that was possible.

Neither of you wanted the kiss to end but you could feel the need for air increasing in your lungs. You were the first one to pull back, catching your breath as you leaned your forehead against Peter’s. He chuckled softly and smiled so wide that his eyes crinkled.

“Woah.”

You nodded and pecked his lips once more with a giggle. The blush on your cheeks was rivalling Peter’s now as you noticed the ride was soon coming to an end. Peter looked disappointed before quickly paying for another ride.

“I hope you did that so you can kiss me again.” You smiled coyly and looped your arms around Peter’s neck.

“Maybe.” He shrugged and laughed before leaning in to kiss you again but this time he hesitated as he saw the looks from some of his classmates. The reminder hitting him like a train.

“Pete? What’s wrong?” Your fingers played with the curls at the nape of his neck as the wheel started to move again. Peter visibly gulped and his mood fell as he looked back at you.

“There’s something I have to tell you.”

You bit your lip in worry and nodded, having a feeling you knew what Peter was going to say.

“Pete I know.”

“You do?”

You giggled and nodded again, kissing his cheek and leaning in close. Peter blushed and looked guilty, his eyes avoiding yours.

“You being Spider-Man doesn’t bother me.”

Peter’s blood ran cold and he quickly shifted away, laughing in pretend disbelief. “I-What?! No. I-I’m not Spider-Man!”

You looked knowingly at him and rubbed his arm, taking his hand back in yours. “Peter it’s okay, i think it’s cool.” You smiled but Peter still sat in denial, shaking his head.

“I-” He gulped and sighed, biting his lip. “Is it that obvious?”

“No but I’ve had a crush on your for a while now and I’m not dumb Peter. The glasses and the letter from Iron Man. And then there was Washington. I just know you Peter.” You blushed and fidgeted with your hands, feeling embarrassed to admit your crush even though you had only kissed him 5 seconds ago.

Peter smiled, finding it endearing that you knew him and had paid attention to him all this time. He leaned back in close to you and rested his hand on yours.

“Oh my god!” You gasped, laughing as Peter was taken aback at your exclamation. “I’m dating a freaking superhero!” You giggled with Peter before kissing him again. The kiss was even more perfect than the last as your lips began to learn and memorise each other.

*~*~*~*~*

The carnival livened up even more as the night went on. The music became louder and the people got more drunk, something that might have made Peter annoyed but nothing could ruin his mood right now. He could still taste the sweetness of your lips on his and he just couldn’t get enough.

You giggled as Peter kissed your lips again after winning you a gigantic teddy bear. He smiled wide and giggled with you, the sound like music to your ears. You hugged the bear tight to your chest after choosing to name it Spidey which made Peter blush.

“This is so amazing.” You remarked as you took a moment to enjoy the scenery surrounding you. Peter sat with you on a nearby bench and nodded, hesitantly wrapping his arm around you. He smiled as you leaned into his side with a happy sigh. The moment was perfect and Peter was sure nothing could ruin it.

You jumped a little as your phone buzzed before pulling it from your pocket. Peter smiled to himself as he saw Spider-Man was the wallpaper on your phone. You blushed and tried to quickly hide it as you opened the message from Betty.

Peter turned his eyes towards the street to give you some privacy, the last thing he wanted you to think was that he was reading your texts (again).

He only looked back at you as you slowly pulled away from his arms, clutching your phone in your hands and only then did Peter notice that Betty had sent you the video of him leaving your room last night. You were scrolling through the comments and Peter saw that amongst the nice or gossiping comments that were hurtful ones calling you names.

“Y/n I-”

You shook your head and bit your lip, quickly locking your phone. You noticed a group of girls from your class staring at you and giggling, whispering in each other's ears.

“I have to go.” You sniffled as you grabbed your bag and quickly walked back to the hotel, ignoring Peter’s calls of your name. He sighed and tried to chase after you but within seconds he had lost you in the crowd and maybe for good this time.

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[rattyoakenbitch]

❝𝐬𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐝❞ ─ 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐝

oh, you're cold as ice, baby. i don't wanna fight, baby. it's like i told you; if you stay, i'll stay

❥ content ; gn reader, angst, happy ending

❥ warnings ; toxicity, drinking, strong language, big but legal age gap, steamy makeout session

❥ synopsis ; after a series of stressful events, you find yourself drinking again. unfortunately, so does spencer.

❥ a/n ; none !

With a heavy, bone-tired sigh, Spencer stepped out of the elevator, making a beeline towards his apartment. He stopped outside the door, bringing his hand to his head. He ran it through his long, textured waves, his fingers getting stuck at the strands tangled together.

Spencer stayed like that, nervously idling outside his apartment. The apartment he shared with you.

Spencer had traveled to California for a case with his team prior. It had been days, if not a week since he had actually seen or talked to you. The day of his departure, you weren't exactly on the best of terms.

You loved Spencer. You didn't doubt it for a second. You would have left him long ago if you didn't. Still, your relationship wasn't perfect. You were both very different, career wise. You were an aspiring photographer, and worked at a local coffee shop on the side. Spencer worked at the BAU. Very different. You had just graduated from college when you met Spencer, and, despite the fact that he was almost ten years older, you hit it off and eventually began dating. Though your messy, inconsistent schedules got in the way of any quality time you could spend together, neither of you decided to go your seperate ways. You didn't want to. You were stubborn. So was Spencer. Not because he was desperate. Hell, he didn't even need to try to get girls. He was practically a pussy magnet.

But he chose you. And you chose him. Because you were both in love. Real love, and that's rare.

It still didn't change the fact that you were bothered by Spencer's lack of presence. You openly voiced your frustration over it several times, but you eventually learned to accept that your relationship would never be normal like that. As long as there were bad guys fucking shit up, Spencer would have no time being lovey-dovey.

Which is why Spencer felt uneasy, afraid of what he'd find at the other side of the door. Would you still greet him with open arms? Or would you shun him?

Well, you did neither.

Your eyes were glued to the screen in front of you, but you weren't mentally present. Which is also why you didn't notice Spencer walk in, his jaw hanging open.

The first thing he noticed were the crushed up cans dumped across the floor, along with broken glass bottles, identical to the one you held in your hand.

The apartment was void of any light, save for the dim illumination the TV screen emitted. Spencer almost didn't notice you in the darkness. You were curled up on the corner of the couch, your eyes, again, never once leaving the screen. Of course, the TV didn't provide enough light for Spencer to make out any your features, but he knew it was you.

"Y-You're drinking again?!" was the first thing Spencer could blurt out, his mind racing with thoughts. You jumped up from your spot on the couch, your heartbeat speeding up at the abrupt noise. You clumsily leaned over to the side table, switching on the lamp. The sudden brightness stung, causing tears to well in your bloodshot eyes.

"Ah - shit," you mumbled, rubbing your eyes. "Hello to you, too. I didn't even hear you come in."

"No, you didn't! What is all this?! What-" Spencer was at a loss for words. He scanned you from head to toe, not believing his eyes. Your hair was unkempt, to put it lightly. The dark circles under your tired eyes seemed to have become a deeper shade since the last time he had seen. Your lips were chapped, but wet with alcohol that also stained your clothes.

"Why?" was all Spencer managed to get out.

You shrugged your shoulders. "Dunno, got a little lonely and bored.." If it weren't for the alcohol, you don't know if you'd be able to remain calm in a situation like this.

"God! You could have stayed with family - I don't know! Just look at the place! Have you even left the apartment at all?"

"How can I stay with family when my only family is states away and constantly traveling?!" you finally snapped angrily.

"Is this what this is about?" Spencer said softly, the realization hitting him like a ton of bricks. He looked away from your hard stare, afraid of the guilt he'd feel.

You stuck out your bottom lip in a mocking pout. "Figure it out, genius boy."

"Watch it," Spencer snapped, but you merely rolled your eyes at him.

"You're not my dad. You're barely a boyfriend! You don't order me around," you sneered, watching a flash of pain spread across Spencer's face. But he was quick to compose himself, playing the calm, peace maker.

"Look, we can discuss this tomorrow when we're both rested and sober."

"Oh, really? The last time we made plans, you had to leave. It's all you know."

"Well what do you want me to do?! Do you want me to quit my job?!"

"I don't know, Spencer! I don't know anything, anymore!" you shouted back. Your head began to spin, tears blurring your vision and then you were on the floor, drunkenly grabbing at the air for support. Spencer rushed to your side, attempting to help, only for you to shove him back, harder than you probably intended. Now you were both a mess on the floor, crying and mumbling curses.

Spencer crawled towards you, clasping your hand in his. "Let me help, sweetheart. S'all I wanna do."

"I don't need your damn help," you scowled, hot tears still spilling down your flushed cheeks. You placed your free hand on his chest, but didn't try pushing him away. "I don't want it.. And I don't want you."

Spencer felt his heart ache at the statement, but he knew it was a lie. A facade.

"I know you don't mean that."

"Well you didn't mean it when you said 'I love you' so I guess we're both liars," you scoffed pitifully.

"I meant it, Y/N, and you know it." You remained silent. "I love you. I really do."

"No, just shut up and this'll be easier."

Tired of your attitude, Spencer gripped your chin, forcing you to look up at him, your glossy eyes locking with his deep browns.

"Dammit, Y/N, listen to me. I love you, so, so much, that I will put up with your stubborn attitude that I hate so much, because deep down, I know you're the biggest softie. And you love me, too, no matter what you say to get me to believe you don't."

"I don't love you." Lies. "I wish I never met you."

Spencer pressed his forehead against yours, nearly headbutting you with the sudden action. His lips just barely brushed against yours, and you could feel his hot breath fan your face.

"Don't you lie to me."

"I'm not lying. I hate you. I fucking loathe you, Spencer Reid."

"Then why haven't you backed away?" he whispered, his voice laced with hope.

Silence.

"Answer m-"

Just like that, your lips were on his, roughly claiming them while effectively shutting him up. Spencer didn't waste a second kissing you back, returning the same roughness. He slipped his tongue past your bottom lip, tasting the bitter alcohol that tainted them. You let out a quiet moan, hoping, just hoping he didn't hear. But of course he did, and that only encouraged him. He wrapped his arms around you desperately, trying to get as close to you as physically possible. Your bodies pressed up against each other perfectly, fitting together in all the right places and curves like a puzzle piece, made for each other.

And this is where you belonged, tangled up in your lover's arms. You didn't want to part. More than anything, you didn't want to break away. But eventually you had to, your lungs suddenly feeling tight with lack of oxygen.

You buried your head in the crook of Spencer's neck, sobbing out.

"God, I've missed you so much. Please don't leave me again. I love you so much, Spencer." You repeated it like a mantra, afraid Spencer would disappear into thin air if you stopped.

Spencer rubbed circles on your back comfortingly. "Shh, baby, I'm right here. I won't leave. I'm sorry. I love you so much," he cooed. "We'll be okay."