#this is not the greatest dick in the WOOORLD.. this is just a tribute.

[sciderman]

wait a fucking second sci, I'm rereading okay. And in 2019 you answered an ask if Wade had ever chopped his dick off and thrown it at someone, Wade said missed opportunity, which means that he did. But in the caption for that you said "the least two asks are related" BUT THE ASK BEFORE WAS 'IS WADE RIBBED FOR YOUR PLEASURE' SO, LIKE, HAS WADE CHOPPED HIS DICK OFF AND FUCKED HIMSELF WITH IT? IS THAT WHAT THAT MEANS? I'M SO CONFUSED ABOUT THIS. BECAUSE LIKE... WHY WOULD THEY BE RELATED IF NOT FOR THAT? WHAT DID WADE DO????

you mean here?

i did mean that the "common thread" was that they're both asks about wade's dick. and i genuinely think not even wade wilson is messed up enough to fuck himself with his own dismembered dick. not unless it was clone nonsense, in which case he absolutely would.

i think he knows enough about biology to know that it wouldn't work, anyway. but i think he might've gone to one of those companies that make a mould of your dick and make a toy out of it. he'd do that. he'd do that and order multiples. one for himself, one for nate, one for peter, one for logan – in fact, he'd hand them out in goody bags for everyone who attends wade and peter's bachelor party. and in that case, he's probably made one from peter's dick too.

peter asks how wade managed to get a cast of his dick. wade says he knows it so well he sculpted it from memory.

this is simultaneously horrifying and insanely romantic to peter. peter, knowing himself very well, commends wade for his attention to detail. they kiss about it. and peter feels less weird about it knowing that it isn't actually his dick, but a loving tribute.