#this is my first writing in MONTHS so please bear with me haha

[von2dutch]

Sugar Baby | Jey Uso

Synopsis: Sex is not a big deal. ...You can have a no-strings-attached arrangement with someone you don’t care about.

Pairing: Jey uso X Black Fem reader | word count: 3.1k | warning: smut, toxic behavior , protected sex | 18+ ONLY

A/N This is my first time writing on here so bear with me I’m new to learning the app I hope you all enjoy it it’s also my first time writing a Jey uso fanfic so please go easy on me. A few writers inspired me to want to write about him I’m not sure if they want to be tagged I don’t want to seem disrespectful but if they do I’ll gladly @ them!

Series master list

Lastly , Enjoy

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Dakota groaned in discomfort, "Ugh, jeez, I'm so sore, I can barely stand..." Jasmine chuckled in agreement, "Haha, I know right? I didn't expect that workout to be so intense.

“Me neither, my whole body is killing me right now…girl remind me to never come to the gym with your ass!” Dakota Murmured in a low breathing trying to regain her breath, her hands kneeled down on her knees taking each breath one at a time. Before standing tall grabbing her water to follow jasmine lead to the front desk.

“girl please all that ass you got you should want to be in shape for your old man sugar daddy.”

Dakota stopped in her tracks staring a hole into her best friend of 6 years in the head, with a mug plastered over her face she spoke again “Omg for the last time that man isn’t that old and he ain’t my sugar daddy!”

Jasmine looked back pursuing her lips together looking at her best friend like she was dumb “whatever you say ms.like em’ old.”

“But ion blame you because last time you came to me with your wig completely fucked up after seeing him, fuck he got super dick?”

Dakota chuckled at her best friends antics seemingly use to it but without jasmine in her life she wouldn’t have any entertainment without her silly jokes.

“No he just knows how to work this thang!” Dakota laughed before sticking her tongue out as the two walked up to the front desk.

While Dakota was focused on making another week ahead for the gym next week, Jasmine eyes were stuck on whoever just walked into the gym.

Jasmine Nuged Dakota shoulder before she turned around with a mug irritated already by her bothering her with Dakota already being tired and trained from an intense workout the two just had “Ain’t that your boy or should I say ol’ man.”

Dakota knitted her eyebrows together in confusion and also curiosity as she turned her body and attention to wherever jasmine focused was and there he was.

Jey Uso

In the flesh there he was looking ever so good , his presence so commanding and charismatic that she couldn't help but admire him with his twin brother Jimmy and a little behind them was their younger brother solo, walking. As they approached a group of men, it looked as if they beckoned them over with friendly gestures.

As Dakota glanced over at Joshua, she couldn't help but take notice of his impressive attire. He was sporting a pair of blue Nike shorts that hugged his body in all the right places, along with black Nike socks that were neatly tucked into his white gym shoes. On his head, he wore a fitted black bloodline hat, which was turned backwards and allowed his mullet to peek through the back. The red tips of his hair added a touch of boldness to his overall look, which suited him perfectly. As he stood there with his bare chest on display, his chiseled abs were impossible to miss. Tribal tattoos adorned his arms and chest, with two more visible on his back. All in all, Joshua's appearance was a sight to behold.

She watched as he greeted the three men before grasping both hands onto a pull up bar his palms facing away from him lifting his entire body going up and down up and down as she watched closely.

She couldn’t help but to stare at his bare back moving ever so smoothly, he hung his body up back and forth downwards she got a flashback from their last meet up two months ago which made her bite her lip titling her head slightly watching as he kept going.

Flashback

“Move yo hand this what you wanted right?” Jey responded to Dakota as she pleaded for him to slow down she tried to push him back away from her as he dicked her down so deep she could Hardly breathe.

she burried her head into the white colored sheets of the hotel room she couldn’t help but cry tears of joy but also pain as his strokes got deeper and deeper from behind “Jeyyyy…b-baby slow down…ugh.”

“Nah you talked all that shit on the phone, I wanna see you take all this dick don’t run from it.”

“Ion even know why you like to play with me princess, you know I’ll fly yo’ ass out to fuck you up.” Joshua spoke with Venom in his voice as his chest heaved up and down, chest beaming with sweat. he pushed a hand down on her neck to pin her down further her ass purked up nicely in his view.

It all started with Dakota missing him which resulted in her being a bitch towards Jey, calling him out his name as far as a “bitch” because he hadn’t been paying her no attention at all the past few weeks. She knew he had a tight schedule as a professional wrestler which has his undefined attention at all times but she also wanted his attention as well even with her just being a sugar baby known as a woman he just used for sex and entertainment when he wanted it.

Now here she was ass up face down and burried into the white sheets of his hotel room as he fucked her viciously from behind pining her down to the bed so she couldn’t run with no where to go. He wanted her to feel all of him from anger slightly misplaced with lust.

“Nah baby use this dick and fuck me back , daddy ain’t going no where.”

Dakota did as told throwing her ass back on him but with much more force while she occupied her fingers underneath her playing with herself. She felt so much pressure and pain all in one her feet became hot with them curled up as he went deeper with each stroke he took.

Taking her breath away literally.

“Mhm you taking this dick like a good girl huh?” Jey rasped slamming into her making Dakota let out a loud moan.

She could feel her body become hot as she felt a knot in her stomach indicating she was about to cum.

“shit!” She cursed under her breath, Jey thrusting into her wet gushy insides.

Joshua watched his dick slide in and out Dakota’s hole, her white creams painting his beautiful Carmel dick, his balls slapping against her clit with every hard thrust he took.

Dakota let out beautiful whimpers, her ass and titties jiggling with the rhythm of Jey’s hard strokes.

Jey grabbed Dakota’s hair, wrapping it around his fist as he thrusted into her harder.

Josh pulled on her hair, forcing her head up as she looked at herself through a the mirror which was in the corner of the room. Her make up smeared with tears , hair all over the place she knew she would need a redo on her hair when she got back home to Atlanta. Her mouth agape as she let out loud moans which couldn’t be heard outside of the hotel room from how thick and sound proof the walls were.

“Uh huh, daddy deep in his pussy ain’t he?” he questioned panting, his tattooed chest heaving up and down.

when Dakota didn’t answer Jey yanked her hair making Dakota let out a loud moan.

“shit! Y-yes daddy it’s fucking deep!” she cried out as tears cascaded her pretty Carmel cheeks.

Jey smiled deviously at her through the mirror, sliver jeweled grills peaking through. feeling her walls clench around him he groaned. he sent a hard snack to Dakota’s ass, “you throwing that ass back like a big girl , baby? You gon’ keep taking this dick like one too.”

Dakota did as told, her taking control again as she bounced back and forth on his length, Joshua bit his lip watching his dick disappear into her whole every time.

The one thing he missed the most was her ass jiggling from behind as he buried his dick deep inside her, her smooth toned back arched ever so slight but at the moment her chest laid flat on the bed while he continued his torture.

“fuck!” Dakota moaned with her face planted in the bed, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as she continued rocking her body.

“Un huh, Baby take this dick.”

“you gotta cum, ma?” Jey questioned, grunting afterwards.

“yes!” Dakota whined reaching her hand underneath her and rubbing at her clit once more, her legs trembling outrageously.

Jey bit his lip harshly, blood drawing as he groaned at the metallic taste.

“gon head Dakota .” He rasped, on cue Dakota and Joshua reached their limits. Her white creams painted all over his dick, her juices squirted out of her and onto Jey’s lower stomach.

Flashback over

“Dakota!” Jasmine's voice echoed through Dakota’s empty ears as she called out to her best friend Dakota, who seemed lost in thought. "Dakota! Dakota, Dakota?!!" she repeated, her tone growing more urgent and annoyed with each call. She wondered what could be occupying Dakota's mind so much that she didn't even hear her friend's voice.

Then it hit her. Jey he was who had her so snapped out of it she watched her best friend bite her lip in daze a, watching him do repeated pull ups.

Finally After staring into the distance for a while, Dakota was brought back to reality when she heard someone calling her name. With a confused look on her face, she looked up and stuttered, "H-huh, what did you say, Jas?"

“I said there go ya’ boy and there he is right now making his way over.” Jasmine said as he indeed was making his way over to them while Dakota mouth hung low she tried her to best to maintain herself. She often felt nervous around Josh and she herself didn’t know why because she wasn’t a shy woman but with him? He had her shy like a school girl.

“Wassup jasmine.” Jey greeted Jasmine with a friendly head nod and a warm smile, before turning his attention to Dakota. With a mischievous grin and a wink “and hey pretty mama.”

With a mischievous grin, he knew exactly what to say to make her radiant smile light up the room. As he gazed at her, he couldn't help but notice the intricate details of her gym outfit, appreciating the way it hugged her curves and highlighted her strong physique.

She wore Black gymshark vital seamless neck sports bra with vital seamless black shorts that hugged her body waist down ever so gently which showed her ass out more flaw. Her breast glazed with sweat as it stucked together almost peeling out of the sports bra her nipples hard as ever from how cold the gym was. Accompanied with white socks and grey gym shoes.

She looked damn good.

“Hey Josh.” She smiled dimples ever so deep into her skin that her pearly white teeth showed all of her teeth from how big she smiled. Gushing with butterflies in her stomach if she was any lighter you could see how red her face was from blushing.

“Hey Josh.” Jasmine mumbled mimicking her with an eye roll immensely laughing at how shy her best friend was. In 27 years of knowing her she never saw her best friend so shy she was always a Fierce Woman, very outspoken. So to see her like this so gushed over this man was surprising and undoubtedly hilarious.

“Shut up.” Dakota mumbled gritting through her teeth while she tried to keep a smile on her face.

To break the awkward silence Josh spoke “Uhh so you leaving?”

“Oh yeah me and jasmine are finished for the day and go grab some food then head home and shower. I see you’re with your brother.”

“Yeah he wanted to come to the gym before the big night Monday.”

“Well it was nice seeing yo— nah we ain’t gon end it like that ma gimme me a hug uce.” Josh insisted opening his arms for a hug she embraced him her hands rubbing against his bare back.

His entire body felt so soft and warm along with his significant cologne he always wore that drove her crazy with how good he smelled.

Josh hands snaked down to her ass grabbing it gently with a soft smack before leaving a wet kiss on her neck before whispering. “You might wanna cover that up uce.” He chuckled at her eyes bucking at the embarrassment she felt when she realized he was referring to the hickey on her neck that her gave her last month.

Gasping she quickly covered it with her hand before grabbing Jasmines hand leading her out the door “Bye Josh!”

“Girllll that man got you whipped huh!” Jasmine joked laughing at how school girl he had Dakota before unlocking the doors to her Mercedes Benz truck both hopping in.

“Whatever.”

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• Instagram story

Dakota.Valentine • 25 secs ago

“Bye Josh.” Dakota chuckled at a TikTok he sent her via message, before hearting it smiling ear from ear. It was a TikTok of a man buying his girlfriend chicken wings when she asked for wings as in pads for her menstrual cycle but he got her wingstop with jey replying with a “Gon be me when you come back over my house, yeet!”

“Oh you in love.” Jasmine affirmed looking at her best friend blush at her phone something she did their whole lunch.

“I am not!”

“Is too!”

Dakota fixed her posture in her seat now facing jasmine directly placing her phone face down on the table giving her undefined attention “and what makes you possible think that?”

“Hmm well for starters the man bough you a mirror vanity with a Chanel purse and a basket of fruit all because you said you wanted to show yourself this year and do beauty content for social media.”

“Then he buys you roses every month even if he misses a few days he buys dozens for each day he missed along with a stack of money, he as well spoils you with gifts, paid for you to go to talum for your birthday, bought you a ring and also rented out a mall for the both of you so you could shop dedicating the whole day to you with a massage, paid for your hair , nails, AND makes sure you eat paying for every meal plus he took you on how many dates?”

“Shall I go on?”

Dakota sat there taking in everything her best friend was saying with nothing to deflect with, she was right Joshua did all those things without her having to asking for anything he just did it because whatever he saw that he thought would look good on her or what made her smile the biggest he got it.

“Then you cook for him everytime he’s in town for his Monday night raw and smack down shows in Atl kota.” Jasmine stated pursing her lips together while she waited for a response. Dakota sat there with a dumbfounded expression.

Thats when realization sat in she realized she was in love, he did so many things for her that she never had done before not even in past relationship. He was there for her in so many ways than just sex, he was there emotionally, physically , and mentally. He cared deeply for Dakota as much as she cared for him. They’ve Had deep conversations about life and marriage something neither ever done with anyone they connected on a deeper level than Just sex he was there for her when she lost her mother a few months back and ever since then he never left her side he was always there.

Despite his best efforts to hide it, Joshua was undeniably smitten with Dakota. Though he was a more mature and experienced man, he couldn't help but pour his heart out to her, showering her with a level of affection she had never before experienced in her life. His love for her was pure and genuine, and she could sense it in every little thing he did.

Despite her best efforts to be difficult and toxic, he always handled her with care and honesty. He was the type of man who never played games, especially when it came to business. He led with authority, yet he had a soft and gentle side. He was dominant without being aggressive but real smooth but you knew he ran shit. His charismatic and funny personality, his loving nature, and his hardworking aura made her focus on him completely. Whenever she was around him, she felt safe and comfortable, knowing that he would always be there to protect and support her.

In past relationships Dakota had never felt safe nor comfortable with men but with Josh it all felt so natural.

The two meet at a bar in Pensacola , Florida where Dakota was in town visiting a client of hers for styling. She was a celebrity stylist, she loved fashion and always dreamed of being a fashion designer or stylist. While she sat at the bar alone josh couldn’t help but stare at the young women, her soft brown legs shined with baby oil along with a black dress that hugged her body so tightly and well , a face a man would die for but he thought her face was better to nut on in his dirty mind.

He walked up to her with a few smooth and flirtatious words which pulled her in instantly jey was always smooth with the ladies. A ladies man of course. With that he prospered to her a deal that he spoiled her of course as well as have sex with her but no string attached as well kinda friends with benefits or a sugar daddy which he wouldn’t call it more so tricking with sex alongside.

Jey was 32 years old and Dakota was four years younger than him at 27. Despite the age difference, the two were still deeply attracted to each other. However, when Dakota was first presented with the proposal that she didn't quite understand or want to accept, she hesitated. The idea of doing something like that was foreign to her, but a little voice in her head, which she recognized as Jasmine's, urged her to "get that money, bitch!" Despite already having her own source of income, Dakota eventually agreed to the proposal.

Starting from the summer of July 2022, the two individuals became inseparable. Their bond grew stronger as they spent time together, and before they knew it, January 2023 had arrived, marking the beginning of a new year that they brought in together. Despite the initial plan to spend only three months together, Josh kept extending their time together, much to the surprise of his companion. She found it odd that he was reluctant to part ways and kept prolonging their time together, but she couldn't help but wonder why.

Was he also in love?

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All I really want to say my darling

Today is a special day we call our own

So take me in your arms and hold me

And tell me you love me

And I'll be there for you

The soft lyrics of Tony! Toni! Tone! Played throughout Dakotas high rise apartment while she finished up on the last touch’s of the cornbread. Dakota was cooking baked macaroni, yams, collard greens, fire chicken with a side of duffeled eggs.

A loud thud on the counter went off as her phone ding with a text message from Jey.

iMessage

Yeet master jey!❤️

I’m here come open the door lady uce!

After meticulously washing her hands, she swiftly dried them off to ensure there were no traces of germs left on her skin. As she reached the door, she saw Josh standing outside, holding a beautiful bouquet of roses in his left hand. A wide smile appeared on her face as she approached him, and he opened his arms, inviting her in for a warm embrace. "Jey, I missed you!" she exclaimed before jumping into his arms. He caught her effortlessly with just one arm, and the two of them burst into uncontrollable laughter, filled with joy and happiness as they held each other tightly.

“I missed you too ko.” Dakota heart warmed at the small nickname he gave her.

“Aww are these for me?” She smiled widely taking the rose from jey she walked towards the kitchen sitting them on the counter. “Of course gotta get my princess something.”

Cheesing to herself she inquired him with a question “Mmhm when were you going to tell me you was in town?”

“Well I was tryna surprise you but I saw you all at the gym looking gorgeous.” He stated wrapping his arms around Dakota from behind he moved her hair out her face leaving a few wet on her neck she responded with a low moan.

“Unt unt let me finish cooking Josh.” She chuckled at his antics of trying to seduce her but she had other plans in mind.

Stepping back with his hands in surrender he spoke “alright alright but how you been? You’ve been eating?” He caressed her cheek staring into her brown hazel nut eyes. “Yes jey I have.”

“You better.” He pecked her lips a few times before moving back looking over her admiring her body.

Dakota has fell into small depression she thought maybe she was too big and wanted to be slimmer so she stopped eating to lose weight and also in the gym but Jey put a stop to that immediately because she was perfect the way she was and she wouldn’t want her any other way.

“I missed you.” Jey spoke with their soft eyes looking directly At Dakota.

“I missed you more.” She responded softly turning her body to face him.

“Missed you so much girl.” He embraced her into a hug, hugging tight as he wrapped his legs around her like spider man hanging his feet in the cabinet while she laughed at his goofy self “It’s all you girl!”

“All you girl!”

“Omg Joshua what is wrong with you.” Dakota laughed once more her stomach hurting from much she laughed her cheeks sore a bit from how hard she smiled. She was in love.

Letting her go he left a few kisses all over her face till she laughed Again before asking her something “So umm…I got a show tomorrow and I want you come.” He asked shyly as if it was the first time he ever took her one of his shows to watch him to wrestle.

“Of course! I’d love to watch you beat some ass.” She smiled punching at his chest playfully.

“Good cause Jimmy been asking about you “where koko?”josh mimicked his twin brother Jonathan earring a small laugh from Dakota.

“Aww my good ol’ friend can’t wait to see him tomorrow.”

“Plus tomorrow is raw XXX tomorrow you know it’s gon be lit.” Smiles thinking about what was in store tomorrow for the fans which included the bloodline with Sami Zayn.

“Oh tell your little girlfriend stop messaging me I’ll hate to beat a bitch.” Dakota scolded Josh rolling her eyes.

Who?

“You know who”

As jey stood there in thought as if he was dumb he then realized who she was talking about “oh Chanel?” He said still acting clueless.

“Who the fuck else Joshua!” She raised her voice slightly removing his arms from around her.

Chanel was an old mistress of Jeys and he broke things off with her two months in but she couldn’t take him leaving her due to the contract ending so she stalked him and was a bitch to every new woman he used for sex and entertainment which was Dakota. It all started in September when Josh and Dakota where out at a restaurant having a few drinks and dinner when Chanel popped up on the two “Oh so this why you’ve been ignoring for this new bitch?!” Channel shouted in the restaurant cashing a scene.

Which escalated in her and Dakota having a back and forth because in all Dakota wasn’t fighting over no man especially not jey no matter how charming he was she wasn’t but the disrespect she took from Chanel wasn’t going to keep happening.

“Look I told you she ain’t my girl and plus ima handle it.” Jey reassured Dakota waving her off.

“You better because I’ll hate to gut a bitch eyes out. Keep fucking with m— What I say?” He cut her off glaring at her with dominance.

“Okay I heard you.” She pouted “but you better handle it cause I don’t have time.” She sighed wrapping her arms around her chest.

Pulling her into an embrace he wrapped his arms around her body rubbing up and down her sides soft and smoothly. “I said I got Dakota don’t worry okay?”

“Okay.”

For a while there was some silence the only thing that could be heard was the music being played from her speaker that was a till she broke the silence with a question “can I ask you something?”

“Yeah , go ahead.”

Dakota started to think back on what Jasmine said was she in love with Josh? Was he in love with her? The question lingered in her mind so much she needed to to know. Even with them not supposed to falling eachother because of the agreement of no strings attached she couldn’t help but fall for him.

“Do your ever….think maybe we could be a couple?” She questioned with pleading eyes but also wanting honesty with anything he threw at her.

Jey thought long and hard for a min before giving her an answer “Honestly no, I mean you’re a gorgeous and talented woman but Dakota we both know this isn’t what we agreed to no strings attached and after a divorce I went through a year ago I ain’t ready for another relationship.”

“You’re just another one of my clients.”

Everything hit her deep in the heart like someone stabbed after hearing those words everything shattered for her. What was she thinking? She didn’t know she even thought he would ever slow down things for her just because he had sex with her but she had hoped

Maybe she wasn’t in love.

To be continued.

I hope you all enjoyed this! More to come let me know if you want chapter two of this series? Also leave comments.

Opinions on jey, Dakota, jasmine , or even Chanel?

How we thinking about the relationship of Jey and Dakota will they fall for each other in the long run?

Lmk and again thank you for reading I hope you all enjoyed! Excuse any mistakes please till next!🎀

Also if you want to be added for a tag-list comment and I got you!

[lady-raidia]

Hi my fellow german ♡

If you're up to, I'd love to request a Gil-Galad x reader writing (: I'm so sad that there is still not much out there. Something fluffy like love at first sight or first kiss (or both haha)

Thank you so much in advance!♡

Hey there! 💗 I am so sorry that you had to wait such a long time for me to respond! :( I was suffering from a writers block and I couldn't write anything for months :'( But I am back and I am trying to catch up! I hope that you enjoy this One-Shot (or maybe two shot hehe) even though it ended up a little bit shorter than I wanted to. But I will try to write a part 2 for this one, so we can have more Gil-Galad content hehe. Again, I am so sorry that you had to wait for such a long time! And I am sorry if my english sounds weird in the story :o But please enjoy! 💗💗

FOREST HEART - GIL-GALAD IMAGINE

Pairing: Gil-Galad x Reader

Summary: You are an old friend of Galadriel and visit her in Lindon, where you wander off into the forest. You just wanted to enjoy the nature but you found a hidden treasure that will change your life.

Warnings: None, just some Gil, snobby language and bad english.

Request Here / Masterlist

Nestled amidst ancient trees and shimmering waters, you have lived a life full of peace and harmony. You had chosen this life, far from Lindon, to escape the gossip and side-eyes you would get when passing by other elves who knew you were not like them. Your father was an elf, but your mother was of the race of men. She was the most beautiful woman you have ever seen but the fragility of a mortal life took her away from you. After her passing, your father followed her into death, since his heart couldn't bear the grief and loss it had suffered.

You grew up in a small cottage close to Lindon, the place your mother and her mother were born and raised. It was your sanctuary, your haven, and as a child, you thought Valinor must have looked exactly like your home. Even after your parents passed away you stayed at that small cottage to care for the garden your mother cherished so much.

Even though you lived your life far from others, you still had close friends you have known since childhood. One of them was Galadriel and you would refer to her as your best friend. You held her dear in your heart and even though you hadn't seen each other for centuries, you regularly wrote letters to each other. You would usually write about how your garden is growing and that the birds are nesting again, while Galadriel would entertain you with the adventures she had been on. (If you can call it an adventure. She is trying to hunt down orcs to find Sauron and with each letter you get from her it becomes apparent that she is slowly losing her mind. You are worried for your friend because she seems too fixated on Sauron being still alive.)

A couple of days ago you received an invitation to Lindon to celebrate Galadriel and her troop for „freeing the world of all evil“. You were happy to hear that her efforts to hunt down every orc are finally being acknowledged! And you wouldn’t be her friend if you wouldn’t tend that celebrations! So with a mix of excitement, worries and nostalgia you went on the journey towards Lindon.

When you arrived, Galadriel greeted you with open arms and a radiant smile on her face! It must have been decades the last time you have seen each other. But before you could talk about old memories and laugh about the shenanigans you did when you were children, she introduced you to Elrond, the herald of the High King. He offered to guide you around since Galadriel had business to do and while he was giving you a small history lesson that wasn’t really anticipating, he also warned you to not get too deep into the forest. For someone who doesn’t know the woods very well it is easy to get lost in them. And the last thing Elrond wants is to lose you and having Galadriel yelling at him for not paying attention. You had to promise to not go on your own and to always stay in the city. And you really wanted to keep that promise. You really did.

The days before the celebration you tried to spend as much time with Galadriel as possible. But she still had some duties she had to attend to, so she would usually leave you alone in the evening. It is your third evening here in Lindon and you already wish to be back at your small cottage. Elves aren’t a noisy folk but still it seemed like their voices were yelling at you. All the people, the talking, the faint music in the distance - you weren’t used to it, so for that moment it was just too much for you. You needed a moment of silence and since you arrived in Lindon it seemed like the trees were talking to you. You remembered the promise you’ve made and said to yourself that you would only walk for a bit - not too far off, so you can easily find a way back. Also, you have the senses of an elf, so nothing could go wrong.

With a sense of childlike wonder, you ventured off the path that was before you and headed straight into the woods. The forest with its towering trees, vibrant flowers and singing birds, mesmerized you and you have totally forgotten the words of Elrond. With each step you take, you get further away from the city but closer to the calmness of your soul.

Lost in the magic of the moment, you failed to notice the sun slowly going down and being replaced by a soft darkness.

„Beautiful isn’t it?“ Suddenly, a voice broke through the silence of the trees, dragging you back to reality. Startled, you turned to find a men standing in front of you with a gentle smile on his face. His presence was both mysterious and comforting. You have seen his face before, many years ago, but you can’t remember who he was. Maybe a friend of your father?

„Indeed. While the soil here might look like any other forest, it is made of hope and wishes from those who have walked here before us." You spoke softly while maintaining your gaze on the man in front of you.

He came a few steps closer to you with a light smile on his face. „It has been a long time since someone recognized Lindon's beauty. Too many became used to its sight and stopped wondering what miracles it might hold.“ You listened carefully to his words and nodded „But it seems you are not from Lindon. Lost, perhaps?“

„Galadriel is a friend of mine, and I am not lost. My feet tend to carry me places where my heart wants to go but my thoughts are too afraid of.“ The man before opened his mouth to share his thoughts with you but was interrupted by the voice of Galadriel who came running towards you.

„Y/N you shouldn’t be here!“ She looked at you and then made eye contact with the dark-haired elf in front of you. „I apologize! Y/N is a visitor and a friend of mine, my king.“ You nearly tripped over a root when you heard your friend address that man as „my king“. The reason his face was so familiar is because he is the High King of the Noldor, Gil-Galad.

Galadriel drags you away from him before you have a chance to speak, scolding you for being so careless. You apologized to her several times and felt that by not addressing him by his title, you had offended the king. In fact, he felt no offense at all. The thought of your conversation still lingered in his mind as he watched you and Galadriel walk away. Whenever his shoulders are unable to bear the weight of the crown, he retreats into the forest to enjoy the silence. Usually, the elves of Lindon don’t go that far into the woods so he can be on his own. But today, you were carried deeper into the woods by your own feet without a care in the world. For a while, Gil-Galad watched you admire the flowers and trees while the last light of the setting sun was reflected in your eyes. He was in awe and for the first time in his long life, he didn’t have the courage to speak. But when darkness slowly reached out, he talked to you and he was immediately enchanted by your voice and words. He always thought that he had lost his heart in the woods but it seemed that you found it. Now it is up to you if you want to claim it for yourself.

To be continued 💗

@fenharel-enaste @starlady66 (I am back, I hope it is okay I tagged you guys again! :) )

[cheri-2047]

Could you maybe try high school Fem!Scaramouche hc with a huge crush on us but being super reluctant and shy about it?? :3

OKAY. I HAVE NEVER WRITTEN FOR SCARA OKAY PLEASE BEAR WITH ME 😭 also dude ure my first request thank u so much <3

so I didn’t know how to write this but THERE WAS AN ATTEMPT. Anyways basically I’m gonna write a bunch of headcanons then some scenarios under that

Please I’m so sorry if I mischaracterized him I really tried I SWEAE 😭😭😭

This is not proofread btw

WARNINGS: none, it’s all fluff :3

Fem!Scaramouche Headcanons:

HEADCANONS:

Fem!Scara would seem like extremely pissed off to everyone, but she would do small tasks for you that she never does with anyone else

Fem!Scara would do her best to not make it obvious that she likes you. (Even if that means accidentally hurting you with her snarky remarks)

Fem!Scara would be more quiet around you. She doesn’t become as arrogant or stubborn around you, well she would be but just not as much since she cares for you

Fem!Scara ime personally, I don’t think she would be much on physical touch, but if you hugged her she would pay your back and put her chin on your shoulder

Fem!Scara enjoys seeing you be passionate about things. She would listen all day to you and keep eye contact.

Fem!Scara would be very well at hiding when she’s flustered. Like if you’re play flirting with her, she would just end it like “…? What do you expect me to say to that?” When in reality, she’s really giddy inside

Fem!Scara would choose to sit beside you during field trips, or if you go to school via school bus. She says it’s just a coincidence (for field trips) but in reality, she really made it so you Teo sat together

Confession time:

Fem!Scara would be really pleased if you confessed to her first. She wouldn’t say yes immediately, (like instead of going “yes yes!!” She would be in disbelief)

Fem!Scara if she were to confess, she would spend a lot of time thinking how she would do it. She would worry if you said no and I feel like she would spend a week bringing herself down saying you’d never say yes and it’s a waste of time (no it’s not)

Scara enters the school earlier than usual to look for your locker. She had decided to just send a letter. Scara finds it and rereads his letter (for the 100th time today…)

“Dear y/n,

Before I say anything, if you were to say no that’s completely fine. I understand I am not the best, but the truth is, these past few months, I’ve started to develop feelings for you. I just didn’t say or do anything about it well..since I didn’t really want you to know or anyone really. I really really like you, but understand if you would just want to stay friends. Thank you for hearing me out.

-Scara”

SHe hesitantly folds it up again, leaving a candy you really like taped to it as he slips it in the gap of your locker. SHe can barely calm himself down but he goes back to the classroom.

As she sees you, she stiffens up, but tries to remain the same.

“Did she read it?”

“Has she even seen it?”

“Maybe I didn’t write long enough?”

“Ah damn it I barely wrote anything!”

She stares at her lap, not daring to look up. As suddenly when you tap hee table, you mention the letter.

“I saw what you left..”

She immediately PANICS clutching her skirt getting ready for a no. She just laughs it off as if it were nothing to hide that she’s actually a mess inside.

“Haha, well what d’you think?”

She tries to act cocky and stuff. But as you come to terms and conditions (when u say yes) she looks at you in disbelief.

“….is this a joke? Are you lying?”

As you say no it’s not a joke, she then stands up and taps your hand.

“Thank you…”

WOWWOWOWOOWOWOW THIS WAS NOT PROOFREAD AT ALL AHHAHAHAH. Anyways uhhh if anyone else wants to request smth, go ahead. School just ended so I have nothing to do for the next few months. Once again, my bad if I accidentally mischaracterized her. I really tried ok. ANYWAYS THANK U, U DONT KNOW HOW HAPPY I AM THAT SOMEONE ACTUALLY REQUESTES SMTH FROM ME LIKE I KID U NOT I GOT REALLT HAPPY AT LIKE 6 AM😭😭😭 anyways thank u again omg I hope this was ok 😭😭

[musingsbycaitlin]

HEY! Writeblr Intro!!!

Hi, my name is Caitlin, and I’m a third year Creative Writing student in rainy England. I’ve got a couple WIPs but none are set in stone so you’ll have to bear with me for a while haha.

- I’m here for a good time so my writing is solely based on my mood and vibe at the time, please do not expect consistency.

- I write short stories mainly but am trying to branch out into novels so you’ll hopefully be seeing a bit more of that in the future.

- I am a university student with anxiety and decision fatigue so things change drastically around here every so often but I promise if I go quiet I will come back.

Let’s get into the WIPs (these will be constantly edited and changing) and feel free to ask me any questions about any of them, even ones that might have been removed from this list if you’re interested.

IF I GIVE UP, SO MUST YOU - a Wild West literary fiction novel

STATUS: currently drafting (on hiatus)

GENRE: literary fiction, sapphic romance(?)

CURRENT WORD COUNT: 3,995

Okay, so a bit of info about this project. I started writing it a bit ago purely because I wanted to write a Wild West novel and then it turned sapphic and then it became literary. It follows an unnamed narrator as she navigates life outside of her small town after she is targeted by bandits in a raid. A coming of age novel that explores what it means to figure things out for yourself whilst battling with false truths engrained into your from a young age.

NIGHT SWIMMING (working title) - a short story collection

STATUS: literally haven’t even started :/

GENRE: literary, horror, surrealist

This collection is my version of NaNoWriMo this year because there is no way I can feasibly write a novel in a month where I also have to write my dissertation first draft and three other short stories like no. I’m hoping to do an update on my page whenever a story is complete, so I will also update this section to include the names of all the stories going in. Stay posted is all I’m saying ;). All I know is I want it to explore the everyday in a surrealist way (as most of my stories do).

DAMAGED GOODS - a dystopian sci-fi novel

STATUS: currently drafting (on hiatus)

GENRE: dystopian, sci-if, speculative

CURRENT WORD COUNT: 2,323

So, I haven’t done an intro post to this yet simply because I had to put it to one side once university started again. A brief summary is this: Auden, an average guy, husband, and father, has gotten into a dreadful car accident. In this society, however, surgery is replaced with metal transplantation. Due to Auden’s extensive injuries, he now must live in suburbia with a completely metal head, arm, and leg.

I’m super happy with this concept and the initial 2,000 words I’ve got I’m pretty okay with. The main issue is where to take it and if it will be a full novel or more of a novella.

EAT YOUR YOUNG - a gothic horror novella

STATUS: currently drafting

GENRE: gothic horror

CURRENT WORD COUNT: 4,950

I haven’t done an intro for this project because I honestly wasn’t sure I’d return to it but the spooky season is upon us and I really want to get back into writing this. Brief Summary: Mr Gerard is an accountant hired by the Heron Manor estate to deal with the affairs of the three sisters residing there after a mysterious death of the man of the house.

This is going to me my main personal priority other than my short stories for now and I’ll try to get an intro out soon.

Okay, so that’s all for me folks. Like I said, any questions please feel free to send me an ask or a message, don’t be a stranger. As a writer I always wanna talk about my projects, OCs, and anything else writing craft related!

I’m tagging some mutuals, if you wish to be tagged or removed :( - let me know x

@annlillyjose @dallonwrites @aesa @winterandwords @iannicellis @isherwoodj

[sister-lucifer]

are you gonna do more ticci toby x male reader? i really really juzt adore your writingz with him- and honeztly, the x male reader haz really helped me cope with feelingz and dyzphoria, zince i juzt dizcovered that i'll never be able to tranzition medically

it'z totally alright if you're not going to do more toby with male reader! i don't mean to prezzure you; they honeztly juzt make me zmile during a zeriouzly tough time.

Toby Cures Your Dysphoria REAL NOT CLICKBAIT 

Ticci Toby x Trans Masc Reader 

Genre: Fluff 

Summary: Toby reminds you that you are in fact a handsome boy:) 

Content/Warnings: I guess implied reader dysphoria if that’s a warning? but like…Omg…guys…i think this is my first ever Toby fic to not have any real warnings. holy shit. oh my god. what the fuck 

Like my writing? I take requests! NSFW or SFW for any fandoms in my bio (request rules + masterlist in pinned post)!

Also, please reblog! it’s free, takes two seconds, and really helps me out 

Feedback is encouraged and appreciated:)

Not fully proofread! Let me know if you see any errors!

A/N: Although I don’t normally write fem reader, i’d actually be very happy to write a trans fem version of this for all my trans sisters out there:) especially since pride month is coming up. maybe i could do an enby version too! 

also, i see and love you fellow trans anon. id like to see you in my inbox more often if you have any requests. i’ll even assign you an anon emoji if you’ll let me:)

“C’mon, s-say it! Say it!” Toby pleaded, a crooked smile spread wide across his face. His fingers were interlaced with yours, pushing you back and forth playfully. 

“Haha, no!” You replied with a giggle, “That sounds dumb!” 

“But you h-have to! You haaaave toooo!” 

“No way!” 

Toby sighed dramatically, blowing a strand of messy brown hair out of his face. For a moment you thought he was going to give up, but since when did you know Toby to be anything but a stubborn hardass? 

He pulled you in to his chest, taking you to the ground with him with a rather jarring thump.

“Ow, you dummy!” You yelped, wincing slightly from the impact, though you couldn’t help but return Toby’s ever-present grin. 

“Eheh…Sorry! But it h-had to be done!” 

He wrapped you into a tight bear hug, possibly using a bit more strength that he meant to, but it did the trick. 

“I-I’m not letting you go until you s-say it!” Toby declared matter-of-factly. You quirked a brow at this, immediately attempting to free yourself. This proved less than pointless, and you were even a bit surprised at how strong such a lanky boy could be. 

You huffed in frustration, resting your chin on his chest as you glared at him, though you both knew you could never really be mad at him. It seems it was time to admit defeat. 

“Fiiiiine,” You groaned, “But you have to promise to let me go.” 

“Cross my heart, h-hope to die.” Toby replied without missing a beat. 

You were silent for a few moments, possibly debating all the life choices that brought you to this before you spoke: 

“I’m…a handsome and capable young man.” 

“Yes you are!” Toby added happily, squeezing you one last time before releasing you from his iron grip. You sat up quickly, crossing your arms while looking down at him with a feigned scowl. 

“Whaaaat?” He drawled, “N-No lies were told!”

“What’s with you?” You demanded, “You’ve been all over me all day; telling me how handsome I am, how I’m ‘such a perfect boy’…Not that I’m complaining, but it came out of nowhere. What’s up?” 

It was then that you saw Toby show the slightest hint of embarrassment for the first time. He looked away from you and toyed nervously with the sleeve of his sweatshirt. 

“Here…g-get off me so I can sit up, then I’ll t-tell you.”

You complied, watching him closely as you tried to figure out what could possibly be going through his head. He took your hands once he was sitting across from you, careful not to squeeze too hard. He didn’t say anything for a few seconds as he tried to find the right words to explain his thoughts. 

“I just…I d-don’t want you to be too hard on yourself,” He began, pausing and allowing you to absorb his words before continuing. “You are a v-very handsome, capable young man, and I-I don’t want you to forget it. E-Even on the days when nothing in your closet m-makes you feel good or…or y-you have to cover your bedroom mirror with a-a blanket…” 

Your gaze softened as he spoke, your hand floating up on its own to stroke his cheek. Not only had Toby been listening to you when you lamented about your struggles, he’d been observing you during them. As laid back and childish as Toby could be, he caught on to a lot more than he let show. It was moments like these that reminded you that underneath the unkempt hair and stained hoodie and scraped knees he was hiding some real emotional intelligence, especially when it came to you. 

When he cared about something his instinct was to learn everything about it that he could. It just so happened that he cared about you the most, and there’s a lot of learning to be done about the feelings and thoughts another person. 

You ruffled his hair with a soft smile which he quickly returned. There was no denying the hint of a blush that dusted his pale cheeks. 

“Toby…” You called softly, “That…that means a lot. Thank you.” 

He immediately lit up, pulling you into another tight hug. You hugged him back this time. He mumbled something behind your back, almost as if he was unsure if he wanted you to hear. 

“What was that?” You asked, pulling away.

“I-I said…I love you, dummy.” His words were still a bit slurred, his eyes avoiding your gaze. 

You pressed a soft kiss to his cheek and gave it a gentle pat. 

“I love you too, dummy.” 

[love-kurdt]

Swooping, Sloping, Cursive Letters: 26

word count: 454

PLEASE READ THIS IS ME TRYING FIRST, AS THIS STORY RELIES HEAVILY UPON THE CONTEXT OF TIMT

August 15, 1989

Dear Will,

When I look into your eyes, I see the rest of my life. Poetic, I know. It kind of came out of nowhere. You know I’m not much of a poetry kind of guy, I’m more of a storyteller, but the thought hit me in a dream I had about you, and I just had to write it down in one of these letters.

God, that makes me sound like a creep. I have only pure intentions, I swear. Actually, that’s kind of a lie. Because we’re all aware by now that having feelings for a boy while being a boy myself is impure. But honestly, I think I’m physically incapable of giving a fuck because when I’m with you, all of the bullshit fades away. It’s just you, me, and your eyes. They’re so green. I look into your eyes and see us, but older. I see myself in your arms, curled up against your chest at night, huddled under blankets for warmth during the chillier months. I see you getting up before me, because Coffee and Contemplation, obviously, and standing at the kitchen counter as I walk up behind you, wrapping my arms around you and faceplanting into your shoulder. I see us holding hands as we walk down the sidewalks of some big city– maybe Chicago, or New York, or San Fran. 

That was what my dream was about, actually. We were walking home from some music festival, and we arrived at our apartment (our apartment!!! crazy) at, like, one in the morning. We got inside, and you shut the door behind us. But then, you grabbed me by the hand, turned me around, pushed me against the door, and pulled me down to kiss me. It was madness. I distinctly remember telling you that I loved you, multiple times, and you could only smile. I think it was difficult for my brain to get you to say something you’ve never told me in real life. Which kind of makes sense. And I know it will never happen. But a guy can dream. Literally. Haha. I’m a comedian. Someone send me to Zany’s, I’d make a killing.

All jokes aside, that dream confirmed once again that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Which, like, is such a daunting thing for many, many reasons. You don’t like me back. We live in a world where that can’t happen. I can never say any of this to you out loud. Only in letters that you’ll never see. So you’re just gonna have to bear with this lovelorn idiot on paper. You won’t, actually… enough with the logistics, though. I love you.

Love,

Mike

-

previous letter | next letter

homepage

[poppyxz]

CODE WAR - Ready to Return (Chapter One)

warnings: sensitive themes

Advanced Warframe Systems (AWS), a government corporation focused on the development of advanced warfare systems, recently worked on developing an artificial intelligence for controlling military drones.

Due to the AI's reinforcement learning, this technology has demonstrated increased efficacy and precision in drones, enabling increasingly autonomous and advanced operations.

However, the technology was stolen while on its way to one of its testing phases by still unidentified terrorists. This triggered a series of events, overloading AWS's cybersecurity team as they worked to recover the stolen data. Meanwhile, the special forces unit "141" was mobilized to identify those responsible for the theft and prevent the use of the stolen technology in the field.

...........

It had been two weeks since you last set foot on the base, as you were "stuck" in a wheelchair recovering from an explosion that sent debris into both of your legs during a mission. Luckily, two months of leave would be enough, and you would soon be back in the field.

Soap visited you whenever he could in the dormitory wing, but it wouldn't be him knocking on your door this time; it was Captain Price.

"Good afternoon, soldier. Can I speak with you in my office urgently?"

You never expected him to be there, as you weren't close with the rest of his team, except for Soap. So, you cleared your throat and replied:

"Of course, sir."

Price gave a small smile and then headed towards the exit. You tried to get ready as quickly as possible, using the bed for support as you put on your usual uniform pants. For a moment, you had forgotten that you would need the wheelchair to move around the base, and you knew it would attract some curious looks.

"Damn... there's nothing I can do," you thought.

After sighing, you slid back into the wheelchair and finished putting on the rest of the uniform.

_______________________

autor's note: English is not my native language, and this is my first time writing here, so please bear with me and correct me 😔 I plan to write more chapters in the future, and I hope it's not too bad haha... I'm feeling so embarrassed about publishing this 😅

Chapter Two:

[queer-charming]

1000 Words - Part 5 - Chuuya x F!Reader (NSFW)

Words: 8.5K

Rating: E

Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content

A/N: ITS FINALLY HERE! Please excuse any grammar or spelling errors, I spent about 8 hours writing this today and I'm tired haha. Anyway, it took me literal months to write this FINAL chapter, for some reason I just had the worst Writers blog, but I hope you enjoy some spicy Chuuya time!

You walked into your office that morning groggy and tired, the beginnings of a headache making themselves known at the front of your skull. You had your fourth cup of coffee in your hand as you set down your purse and draped your coat over the back of your chair. You sat down, gave one more good stretch before turning your attention to the stack of papers and envelopes engulfing your desk before you. Reluctantly you plucked one envelope from the top and popped it open, pulling the chicken scratch written letter out and doing your best to discern what the first word was.  

A knock at your door pulled your attention away from the parchment in your hand. “Come in,” You croaked out in your still not fully functional early morning voice. The door opened to reveal a familiar figure, a figure clad in well fitting black trousers, a tailored white dress shirt and a signature choker. Chuuya sauntered into the room, effortlessly closing the door via his ability behind him, holding up a cardboard carrying box of coffees.  

“I come bearing gifts.” Chuuya planted the case of coffees down on your desk. “Also I didn’t know your favorite and I don’t have your phone number to ask so I took a guess, I take you as one with a sweet tooth.” You smiled. You do indeed have a sweet tooth, you happily took one of the cups of coffee, favoring it over the halfassed cup of not nearly strong enough coffee you had brought from home.  

“So you remembered our deal.” You remarked, taking a sip out of the cavity inducing drink in front of you.  

“I am a man of my word y/n.” Chuuya replied in a tone that was all too serious to actually be taken seriously. Using his ability, Chuuya pulled a chair from across the room to sit across from you. “Also with how many of these reports I send you, its only fair I experience the pain of reading them at least once.” You chuckled.  

“Well I wish you luck,” You chose a random stack and plopped it on the desk in front of the redhead. “Tell me when the headache kicks in, I have Tylenol.”  

*************************** 

To be honest, you hadn’t actually expected Chuuya to make it past a few reports before he gave in and quit, but here you were, nearly four hours in and almost half way through your stack of papers and he was still going, granted he’d moved from the seat across from you after about four reports and has now positioned himself sat upside down on the ceiling, every few minutes you’d find a single sheet of paper drift down from the ceiling and back onto your desk as he completed reading it. You spared a glance up at him every few minutes, just to make sure he was still awake, despite the metric fuck ton of coffee you both had consumed throughout the morning.  

“These are written by fucking toddlers!” Chuuya’s voice startled you out of your focus, nearly causing you to drop the papers currently held in your hands. “They might as well be written in crayon.” And while you agreed with your favorite ginger haired mafioso, the only response you had to make was a chuckle behind your papers.  

“Kouyou said that there used to be an operative who would actually write his reports in crayon.” You chimed in, the memory suddenly rising to the surface.  

“That was Dazai.” Chuuya paused. “I never saw him do it but it sounds like something that idiot would do.”  

“What was he like?” You asked, and after a pause you added. “When he was an executive.”  

Chuuya seemed to think for a second before responding. “Besides a scathing pain in my ass? He was immature, reckless, lazy, strolled his way through missions and took special pleasure in traumatizing other agents.”   

“Mori always seems so wistful of him though.”  

“That my friend, is because as far as Mori was concerned Dazai was a ray of fucking sunshine who could do no wrong.” There was a certain level of venom in Chuuya’s voice, one you imagined that had it been directed at you, would sent a wave of panic through your body. You were glad it wasn’t. 

Before you could finish your thought, Chuuya was back on the ground, standing before you, hand reaching for a pen as he wrote one of what probably would end up being about fifteen correspondence letters to other agents regarding information in their reports. You were able to glance at a few of the letters Chuuya would write, and compared to his letters, even your most sternly written ones sounded like pleasant requests. You imagined you would have several panic written letters sitting on your desk tomorrow morning.  

“Chuuya what a pleasant surprise!” Kouyou’s voice boomed from the office door. “I was wondering why your office was empty, what brings you to the records department?”  

“I offered to help (Y/N) today since you refuse to hire a full team and she was dead on her feet last night.”  

“No I wasn—” You started before Chuuya shot you a look and you immediately shut your mouth. He hadn’t turned to greet Kouyou yet.   

“Last night? Now what would you be doing to keep my lovely (Y/N) up so late?” You didn’t even have to look at Kouyou’s face to know how suggestive that single sentence sounded and imagine the look of the cat that caught the canary on her face.  

“Hardly anything even close to what you’re thinking,” Chuuya countered quickly. “It all pertained to work.” It was at this point that Chuuya finally turned to face his mentor who still looked at him as if she knew something he was trying to hide. Kouyou stood for a moment in silence, waiting to see if you were going to add anything.  

“Well, that is very kind of you. It seems you two must have had a very busy morning then, considering the volume of reports this week, why don’t the two of you take a break, go get lunch or something, I’m sure all these reports will still be here when you get back.”  

“But-”  

“That sounds like a fantastic idea, come on (Y/N).” Chuuya cut you off before plucking your current report from your hands and placing it down on the table. He grabbed for one of your hands, pulling you from behind your desk and toward the door of your office.  

“So what was with the hasty exit?” You finally asked after the two of you had sat down at a little coffee shop down the street from the Port Mafia headquarters.  

Chuuya stirred his coffee. “Trust me, that woman comes standard with ulterior motives.” This you did know already, you’d worked with Kouyou plenty long enough to learn that. “Had we stayed I can guarantee she would have orchestrated some plan to give herself some entertainment at the expense of the only two other people in the room.” You nodded, both of you sitting in silence for a few moments. “Besides,” Chuuya started again. “You can’t tell me you aren’t ahead of schedule now.” He was right, you were well beyond where you would be had he not been with you all morning.  

“Thank you.” You said with a smile, taking a cautious sip from your steaming coffee. You were probably well above the safe limit of caffeine intake but it wasn’t like that particularly concerned you at this moment.  

The day had been a dreary one, rain clouds that threatened to pop at any minute covered the sky, What little rays of sunshine cut through the gloom were rapidly being eaten by the gray clouds. “Least I could do for humoring me last night.” Chuuya said after he set his own cup of coffee back down on the table. “You could have just declined and asked for the rest of the report.”  

“No I couldn’t.” You countered easily.  

“(Y/N) You don’t work for me, you can say no to me anytime you want, you won’t see any repercussions.” 

“That’s not why.” You said before you could stop yourself. Looking back at the executive, you recognized his curious expression, the silent question in his eyes, ‘why then?’ it asked. “I didn’t go to your office last night because I felt obligated to, I went because I wanted to.” You said cautiously, hoping he took it as exactly what you said and didn’t hear the ‘because I’m desperate to spend time with you’ between the lines. It was silent for a few minutes afterward, Chuuya seemingly mulling something over in his head. Finally he spoke.  

“Take the rest of the day off.” He said bluntly.  

“I bet your pardon?” You squawked. What? Absolutely not, you had so much to get done! Did he forget it was report season? 

“You heard me,” He retorted. He seemed to hear your internal shouting. “Look, you’re going to be done with report season a full day early with what we got done this morning anyway, its the perfect opportunity to take half a day and recharge.” Your shoulders were still tense as you looked at him incredulously.  

“And what about you? Gonna go back to your office and drown yourself in more work while I get to trapeze through a day off?” Chuuya smiled, it was small but noticeable.  

“Who do you think you’ll be spending the day with?” Everything stopped, the world halted where it was. You stared at the man before you for a moment before collecting yourself. Calm down, it was just a day for two friends to spend some time and relax, no stress of work, don’t overthink it. It’s nothing. “As long as you’d like to, that is-” 

“It sounds fun.” You interrupted his backtracking. “What are your plans?” He seemed stalled for a minute, like he hadn’t been expecting you to say yes. Finally his mind seemed to catch up.  

“You hungry?”  

******************** 

Three days. It had been three days and it was nothing but silence, all consuming, deafening silence that rocked you to your bones and put a pit in your stomach. It was day three into a new report season and Chuuya was stuck in a mission that was only supposed to last a day, but it's been three and there has been no correspondence, no status updates, no communication and you felt the anxiety in your veins and the tremor in your breaths.  

You sat in your office, attempting your best to focus on a letter than should have taken you five minutes but instead had taken you thirty. It was maddening. Chuuya was fully capable of handling himself, perfectly capable of getting himself out of any dangerous situation, but no word from him, no ‘we’re okay, it’s just taking longer than usual’. He was on another joint mission with the ADA, something big and something bad, so big and bad in fact, that you knew almost nothing about it, all you knew was probably the most terrifying fact, that it may require a return of double black.  

You slammed the letter in your hand onto the desk, mind far too jittery to even consider working. Sure, Chuuya had been away for weeks at a time before on missions, but there had always been constant updates, there had never been total radio silence, and one thing you knew from working in the Port Mafia for so long, radio silence was never good. You stood from your desk, walking around your desk to the small window in your office, looking out on the gloomy day. Your arms were crossed over your chest as you tried to force your mind to quiet. Worrying wasn’t going to do anything, it was only going to stress you out more. You took deep grounding breaths, it wasn’t helping.  

“He’s going to be fine.” Kouyou’s voice broke through your thoughts. You didn’t know when she’d come into your office, and frankly you didn’t care. “There isn't a force on this planet that could take Chuuya out, not without one hell of a fight.”  

“Any word?” You asked. You didn’t bother hiding your concern, there was no use doing so in front of Kouyou. Knowing her, she probably predicted you’d develop feelings for her favorite protege as soon as you’d sent that first letter. There was no point in trying to hide from her.  

“Not yet, but this isn’t the first time Chuuya’s done this.”  

“When was the last time?” You asked. Her words had brought a sliver of peace to your panicked mind.  

“The dragonhead conflict, he was sixteen.” You’d read past reports on that conflict, it was bad, the casualties unrivaled in almost all of the Port Mafia’s history. It was where Chuuya and Dazai had gotten the name double black, where they were named devastating rivals. You weren't even in Yokohama at that time. “Chuuya ended that conflict near single handedly, he’ll be fine.” You took another deep breath.  

“Thank you, Kouyou.” You sighed. You still hadn’t turned from the window, but your grip on your arms had loosened and your rapid heart rate slowed, even if slightly.  

“Executive Ozaki.” A voice broke through the short silence. It was the voice of one of the couriers as he sped down the hallway toward his superior. “Word, from Executive Nakahara.” Your heart rate raced again at the message, scrambling to get to Kouyou as she took the letter from the courier. “I was directed to give it directly to you.”  

“By whom?” Kouyou inquired.  

“One of Executive Nakahara’s team.” With that the courier left, leaving you and Kouyou to open the letter. Unfolding the parchment, Kouyou read its contents silently. She took a deep breath.  

“Chuuya is alive,” You released the breath you’d been holding at the words. “However, the conflict has yet to fade, it seems Chuuya may have to resort to drastic measures to get the job done.”  

“What are drastic measures?” You asked, though you could guess.  

“Corruption.” Kouyou responded curtly. She sighed. “Luckily Dazai is there, this will be coming to an end shortly.”  

“What would happen if Dazai wasn’t there?” You found yourself asking, unsure if you really wanted to know the answer.  

Kouyou only looked at you for a moment, seemingly debating how she wanted to answer. “If Chuuya were to ever use his corrupted state without the presence of Dazai, corruption would rip him apart from the inside out until it killed him.” You stopped breathing.  

“Dazai would never-” 

“No,” Kouyou interrupted, guessing your question. “Dazai would never voluntarily let Chuuya die of Corruption, he will always pull him out of it.” You nodded, returning to your desk to attempt to continue your work. 

*************************** 

It was Friday, two fifty-four in the afternoon when the letter landed on your desk. You recognized the penmanship anywhere, and your breath stalled in your lungs when you looked at it. It was from Chuuya, presumably the report from the harrowing mission he’d just returned from.  

Chuuya got back to Yokohama only yesterday, but he never came into the office, instead he was under direct orders to go home and recover, orders from Mori himself. He was on mandatory leave for no less than three days, as that’s how long it usually took him to get back on his feet after using corruption. Apparently this time was different than normal, he’d been under longer than usual, Dazai just managing to pull him out in time. Kouyou said he had slept for ten hours when he got back, he was so incapacitated she had to make sure he was still breathing a few times, the news had made your blood run cold.  

The letter on your desk brought warmth to your chest, it confirmed that he was okay, well he was alive at least, you weren't sure if okay was a word you’d use yet, it had only been twenty-four hours since he’d gotten back. But the letter also brought a different feeling... annoyance. What the FUCK was he doing working when he was under strict order not to? Also how did he even get the letter to you in the first place? He wasn’t even allowed in the building right now, the doormen ordered to shove him back in the direction he had come if he even darkened the doorway. Mori was very serious with his executives, if he said Chuuya needed to rest then damn it he was going to make sure he did.  

You tore open the flimsy seal that kept the envelope closed, perhaps a little too aggressively, and pulled out the folded parchment inside. The handwriting was still just as neat, if not a little trembled.  

“Mission number – 32846 – was a success,” the letter started. “Albeit a difficult one. Our target’s name was Yuzono Hakatski, a former Port Mafia member and a traitor. She’d been causing issues for the boss for a few months now, interrupting supply chains, burning down warehouses, killing our couriers, seriously what happened to don’t shoot the messenger?” You found yourself smiling at the joke. It was clearly strained, you could feel that even through the writing, but the fact that he was still making an attempt to be funny warmed your heart. “Originally Mori thought we’d just have to deal with her ourselves, but it turned out this particular thorn in our side and a bone to pick with a specific thorn in my side. She hated Dazai, so much so she was willing to dismantle the entirety of the ADA just to get to him, and she almost did, they were lucky to leave that battle field with no casualties, our team however wasn’t so lucky, we lost six good agents to her team of overzealous hit men. One of them was strong, much stronger than the others, wouldn’t let anyone get close to him and had the fight in a choke hold. His ability was something else, a near cosmic force of destruction and mayhem, and unfortunately the only way to fight that kind of ability is with another cosmic force of destruction and mayhem, and unfortunately for him, mine was stronger, but unfortunately for me, it fucking sucked. Yuzono Hakatski has been returned to Port Mafia custody and awaits trial for her crimes, more than likely she’ll be executed and we can all put this behind us. I’m aware I'm missing quite a few chunks in this story, but frankly I'm not sure I'm in the condition to be going all over it in this letter, but if you have any questions, forward them to my home office.” Underneath the final sentence was an address, this was Chuuya’s personal address, the address to his apartment, he’d given you the exact location of where he lived, information that even some of the most high ranking members didn’t have access to, he’d just given it to you in a letter. You let that information sink in for a minute, the annoyance you’d been feeling dissipated briefly, but quickly made it’s return when you reread the letter and realized he was in no condition to write this letter, let alone write more. He was supposed to be resting, not doing his due diligence, other members of his team survived, they could write this to you for now, he needed to fucking rest for once. You slammed the letter down on your desk, your mind made up, you were going to utilize the address he gave you, but not for the reasons he gave it to you.  

Finding the apartment was surprisingly easy, it wasn’t far from your own honestly. It was approximately ten AM the next day and you stood outside a large metal door, you double checked and made sure the numbers on the door matched the numbers in his letter, then you triple checked and quadruple checked as you tried to school your breathing. This was simple, you were just coming to check on him, maybe make him some food because you doubted he could do it very well right now and you were determined to make sure he was eating. Your grip on your purse loosened slightly, your hand stiff from how tightly you’d been holding it. Its fine, this was only a guy you were going a little crazy for who was sweet and considerate and made your heart race every time you even looked at  him, what could go wrong?  

Steeling yourself and gathering as much nerve as you could, you lifted your hand, giving a solid three knocks to the door and waiting for it to open. It didn’t take long before you heard movement on the other side, the heavy clunk of a lock mechanism as it released and suddenly the door was opening. Chuuya looked exhausted and incredibly shocked to see you standing outside his door, his copper hair, normally precisely tamed and managed, was a little more loose, clearly unbrushed today but not completely out of control, he wore a simple grey long sleeve and black joggers. There were dark circles under his wide eyes and his skin, normally fair, was abnormally pale and feverish.  

“(Y-Y/N)?” Chuuya stuttered out. “What are you-” 

“I thought Mori said mandatory rest,” You interrupted him, crossing your arms over your chest and feeling the annoyance from the day before rise again in your chest. “What do you think you’re doing trying to send me reports when you should be recovering?” You ranted.  

Chuuya was silent for a moment, seemingly processing what you had said and catching up to the fact that you were stood right there in front of him, then a smile cracked his features. “Did you come all the way here just to lecture me.”  

You halted. “N-no,” You sputtered out, feeling warmth rise to your cheeks. “Mostly.” You looked away, silent for a minute before the worry started to seep back into your bones. You turned your attention to the man in front of you. “Are you okay?” You asked. He smiled again.  

“What, worried about me?” He said, clearly intending for it to be a joke, but the truth clawed its way out of your throat before you could stop it.  

“Yes,” You said, seemingly surprising him a little bit, but you couldn’t stop the flow of words from your lips. “Three days of no communication, I didn’t know if you were alive or dead and I was terrified that you weren't going to be coming back and  when Kouyou told me about you having to use corruption I got even more scared, what if Dazai didn’t pull you out in time, what if-” You rambling was cut off abruptly by a pair of arms around your shoulders. You were being hugged, Chuuya was hugging you. Your mind short circuited. He was warm, really warm, the smell of cinnamon and firewood filled your senses, you found yourself memorizing it as your arms came up to wrap around his middle, burying your head into his neck, letting him surround you. It was the first time he’d ever hugged you, in your many months of knowing him, of talking to him and being around him, it was the first time he hugged you, and you were grateful for his firm hold on you, fearing your knees would give out at any minute.  

“I’m sorry for worrying you.” He whispered against your hair. “I’m okay, better than I was yesterday that’s for sure.”  

“How long does it usually take?” You found yourself asking against his throat. You hadn’t pulled away yet, content to just stay there engulfed in his warmth, feeling his steady heartbeat against your chest.  

“A few days, typically, I’m sore but functioning just fine, no need to get all wound up.”  

You chuckled against his skin. “Well unfortunately you make it very easy to get all wound up.” You felt him expel a breath, a partial laugh as he finally pulled away from you. You mourned the loss, but found you were much more relaxed than you had been just moments before.  

Chuuya stepped aside, allowing you entrance into his home. “Well if I'm going to have a baby sitter she may as well come in.” He joked, a kind smile on his lips. Chuuya’s apartment was neat and well furnished, matching floor to ceiling windows to his Port Mafia office, the floor was a pristine white wood, a red rug under the small coffee table of the living room sat between two white couches, red pillows decorating either end of each. The apartment was open concept, the only thing separating the kitchen from the rest of the house being a single counter top attached to a marble bar, it was a home befitting a mafia executive.  

Once he closed the door, you noticed how his walk was stiff, his body clearly straining to keep him upright. He looked tired, his complexion, while mildly better than it had been when he had first opened the door, was still far too pale for your liking, and despite the fact that it’s only been a few days since initally left for that mission, he looked thinner.  

“So,” Chuuya started, pulling your from your thoughts as you hung your purse on the rack near his front door. “Since you’re here, would you like to get the rest of that report, save me from having to write it all?” You stared at him.  

“You mister,” You jabbed a finger at him. “Are not allowed to do any sort of work until your better. Don’t even think about it.” Chuuya raised his hands, showing his palms, an amused look on his face.  

“Yes ma’am.” You chose to ignore the warmth that phrase bloomed in your core and instead set toward his kitchen to see what he had to work with, you were thinking soup.  

“You don’t have to cook for me you know, I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself when this happens.” Chuuya said as he watched you gather ingredients, chicken from the fridge, some fresh vegetables, he even had the stock, tucked away far in a cabinet.  

“Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.” You said as you set a pot to boil on the stove, you hadn't turned to look at him yet, so of course you were currently missing the way his eyes trained to your back, trailed down your spine. The way he watched your hands move as you diced the multitude of carrots, leaks and other veggies you’d found stashed in his fridge. “What’s the point of having friends if they don’t cook for you when you’re recovering?”  

“Well most of my friends are in the mafia, so...” 

You jabbed your knife in his direction from across the room. “No excuse.” All in all, he let you cook, allowed you to use his kitchen to your hearts content and even offered to wash dishes, which again, you refused to let him do. For someone who was supposed to be resting, he sure was bad at it.  

“Has anyone ever called you a workaholic?” His voice chimed after so many minutes of silence. You were at the end phases of your cooking, Chuuya having forgone his standing and instead opting for a seat at the bar as he watched you move about the kitchen. “Because I feel like the word fits pretty well.”  

“Says you mister, ‘let me send this report in the day after I almost kill myself’.” You jested, you didn’t turn to look at him, instead keeping your attention trained on the boiling pot before you. You heard him give a playful chuckle.  

“I’m serious though,” He started. “You spend all day working on safe routes for agents in the field, organizing bribes, gathering information, then a week a month you voluntarily drive yourself insane as you read hundreds of reports written by literal children, and then to top it off, you come over here and proceed to make soup the second you walk in the door because I’m mildly sore. Do you ever take a day off?”  

“Do you?” You countered.  

“Not my point and you know it.”  

You thought for a moment, when was the last time you took a day off? There was that half day you took with Chuuya after he’d helped you with your reports that season, but beyond that, you couldn’t remember. “What about that day you and I went to that cafe, I took that day off.” You finally turned to point the wooden spoon in your hand at the man sitting behind you.  

“First of all,” Chuuya countered. “That was only half a day, and second of all, I practically had to drag you away from your work kicking and screaming.”  

“That’s a little dramatic.”  

“Am I wrong?” You stayed silent, pouting as you returned to your soup. No, he wasn’t wrong, but you weren’t going to let him win that easily. You could feel his smugness behind you.  

“Maybe I should have you come over and cook for me once a week... you want a job?” Chuuya joked as he lounged across from you on the other couch.  

“I already have a job, thank you.” You smiled as you joked back, but your were happy to finally make him eat something.  

“Well I can’t pay you as much as Mori does, but I can promise not to run you as ragged.” You felt heat rise to your cheeks at his words, a much different image coming to mind at the words. Damn him and his stupidly attractive face.  

“As tempting of an offer as that is,” You started. “I quite like my job, I get all the Port Mafia gossip delivered right to my doorstep courtesy of Kouyou.”  

“She does like to gossip,” Chuuya confirmed, then a startled look washed over him. “She hasn’t said anything about me, has she?”  

You eyed him suspiciously, the urge to stir the pot rising within you. “Maybe, maybe not.” You supplied, maybe a little bit of a lilt in your voice as you watched his reaction.  

“Don’t think just because I’m a little sore that I won’t come over there.” He threatened, pointing a finger at you. You felt excitement well up in you, you understood why Dazai enjoyed messing with Chuuya so much, it was fun.  

“And do what?” You teased further. “Show me the wrath of gravity?” He huffed out a laugh, a disbelieving smile on his face as he sat up straighter, like a tiger ready to pounce.  

“You think I won’t? Are you daring to challenge a Port Mafia executive? You’re walking a dangerous like missy.”  

You laughed. “Missy? Is that the best the great Executive Nakahara has, most feared executive?” You don’t know what made you so bold, maybe it was being alone with him, maybe it was being so casual, but you couldn’t bring yourself to stop if you wanted to.  

“Brat.” Was all he said before he lunged forward, it was only half serious, but fast enough for you to barely dodge. The coffee table, the only thing separating him from properly reaching you, was moved across the room like it weighed nothing, you guessed with Chuuya’s ability, it really did weigh nothing to him. With your only line of defense gone, you jumped up, narrowly avoiding his hands wrapping around one of your arms as a excited laugh fell from your lips.  

“I was expecting more from a big tough executive,” You taunted, though a feeling in your chest led you to believe you may grow to eat those words later. “Can’t catch a little girl?” Chuuya stared at you for a moment, blue eyes boring into yours, a look of mischief in his smile.  

“I was going easy on you,” He started. “But now that you’re gonna get cocky I guess I gotta teach you something, huh?” Your heart leaped into your throat as he lunged at you again, this time undeterred by the coffee table, his hand reaching your forearm before you could dodge him, not like you’d be able to even on your best day when he was being serious. He yanked you forward, his other hand finding your lower back, one of his legs coming behind your own to pull it out from under you and suddenly you were heading for the ground, but what should have been a hard impact was a gentle glide onto the soft rug beneath. Your back touched the floor, one of your arms still trapped in his grasp, holding it over your head as he hovered over you. You breathed hard, trying to catch your breath. “Anything else you’d like to say?” Chuuya prompted, a cocky grin on his face. You shook your head, suddenly realizing just how close he was to you, hovering just above you, only inches from your face, if you leaned up just slightly, it would only take a little. Chuuya seemed to come to the same realization, his eyes suddenly wide as he stared at you, but he didn’t back away, didn’t release your arm or let you get up. 

The sun was beginning to set outside, rays of orange and yellows spilling into the room, reflecting off of the light floors and walls, painting Chuuya’s copper hair in flames as it fell around his slender face, his eyes holding more shades of blue than you remember last seeing, you wanted to count them. Without thinking your other hand, the one not pinned the floor, came up, gently brushing a stray piece of red hair away from his face, holding it out of the way so you could see him properly. His eyes darted from your own down to your lips and back again. He leaned down slowly, slow enough to give you time to tell him to stop, not that you wanted to. You met him in the middle, a gentle press of lips, a chaste kiss, cautious and experimental. Fireworks went off in your brain as you separated, but it wasn’t long before his lips were on yours once more, this kiss much more hungry than the first, the first had been innocent, curious, it said ‘I like you’. This kiss was sure, absolute in its devastation as you let him steal your breath away, let him press you into the floor, when he started to pull away, lifting your head to chase him, pulling him back to you with nothing more than a hungry kiss, it said ‘I want you’. He released your arm, you quickly wrapped it around his neck, pulling him down toward you as his free hand went to the back of your knee, hiking it up and over his hip as he settled between your legs. The heat that had been building in your abdomen all day was beginning to overflow, overtake you as your other arm tangled in his hair, giving a swift tug and drawing a gasp from his lips. You took advantage of the moment to introduce your tongue to his, memorizing his taste, unsure what the noise was that you produced, but seemed to spur him on as he gave a rough roll of his hips, perfectly positioned to pull a ragged gasp from you. He pulled his lips away from you, but not far, close enough that you could feel his breath against your skin as he panted against you, his nose occasionally brushed yours.  

“Tell me to stop.” He panted, so close you could feel the words on your lips.  

“No.” You whispered back, surging forward to capture his lips again, he didn’t stop you, instead his other hand coming up to cradle your jaw as he tilted your head upward, giving himself better access as he plunged his tongue into your mouth. His thumb was over your pulse point, no doubt feeling how rapid your heart was beating. He broke the kiss, but only to trail his lips over your jaw, pressing heated kisses against your throat, sucking hard against your pulse, ripping a broken moan from your lips. It was going to leave a mark, one that would last beyond just tonight, you felt heat between your legs at the thought. His lips returned to yours, though the kiss had devolved back into something sweet, still hungry and passionate, but gentle. Suddenly he broke the kiss, rising to sit up on his knees as you looked up at him curiously. His hand rested on the outside of your thigh, his other coming up to push strands of hair out of his face.  

“As much as I would love to fuck you on the floor,” He panted as he caught his breath. You felt the coil in your core tighten at the words. “That may be better suited for a day when my muscular system isn’t screaming.” Right, you’d forgotten about that, he was supposed to be resting. You rose to sit before him, pushing some of your hair out of your face.  

“We don’t have to...” You lead on, not quite saying the words. “Tonight, if it’s too much, we can always-” 

“That’s not what I said,” He stopped you, leaning down to place a chaste kiss to your lips. “I still want to have sex, just not on the floor....If you still want to, that is-” 

“Yes.” You didn’t let him finish as you got to your knees, a hand hooking behind his jaw to pull him to your lips, reveling in his taste for a moment. “Yes, I want to.” You whispered against his lips. Without another word, he pulled you off the floor by hand before guiding you across the apartment toward his bedroom.  

The second the door closed he was back on you, his hands grasping tightly at your hips as he stole your lips in a heated kiss, your arms wrapping around his neck as your tried to pull him closer. You let him back you up toward the bed, climbing up onto it and coaxing him to follow, on your knees as you slipped your hands under the hem of his shirt, memorizing the feel of his abs against your fingertips as you pushed his shirt up and off, finally breaking the kiss to get it off and tossed to the other side of the room. Your breath escaped you when you looked at him, he didn’t seem real as you lowered your head to plant heated kisses over his shoulder and up his neck, pulling the sweetest gasps from his lips as your hands tracked up his torso until your lips once again met his. You let him coax you onto your back, once again settling between your legs as his lips found your neck, you tilting your head up to allow him better access. He nipped at your skin as his hands ventured lower, slipping under your shirt to hike it up, moving to pull it off to join his on the floor. His lips ventured to your chest, moving down until he reached the fabric of your bra, one hand moving behind your back to make quick work of the clasp before the item was discarded. He raked over you with his heated gaze, his eyes igniting fires over your skin as he lowered himself over you once more, his lips tracing the swell of your breasts as his hands ventured lower to grab at the skin above your waistband, grip tight enough to bruise. You arched your back at the sensation of his tongue laving over one of your peaked nipples, drawing a desperate gasp from your lips as one of his hands came up to kneed at your other breast. Your mind was foggy, unable to focus on anything but him, but his touch, his lips, his tongue.  

He rose again, his hands making a quick downward journey to the button of your pants, popping it open before yanking roughly at your waistband, dragging the fabric down your thighs along with your panties, throwing the clothing across the room as he took you in, laid out before him like a meal. He leaned forward, taking your hands in his as he intertwined your fingers, pinning your hands above your head as he caught your lips in a heated kiss, grinding his still clothed erection hard against your bare core, ripping a moan from your throat, which he took advantage of to thrust his tongue back into your mouth. 

“This is how that night in my office would have ended if that courier hadn’t walked in.” Chuuya panted against your lips.  

“Fucking courier.” You said as you hastily reconnected your lips, he gave a huff of a laugh before once again descending your body, lips tracing a searing trail down your torso until he was pressing heated open-mouthed kisses to your inner thighs, sucking dark marks there, marks that would last days, marks that no one would ever see except him.  

“I was thinking of all the ways I could have you over my desk.” He confessed as he kissed up your thigh, toward where you were wanting most. “I wanted to devour you right then and there.”  

“I would have let you.” You confessed back. “I was so desperate for you to kiss me.” You let out a gasp as he placed a kiss to your core.  

“Live up to your expectations?” He breathed against you, sending sparks up your spine. All you could do was nod as he licked a hot strip from your entrance to your clit, hands coming to pin down your hips as he worked to unravel you. Your hands tangled in his hair as he repeated the motion, his blue eyes looking up to meet yours before he gave a rough suck to your swollen clit, a ragged moan ripped out of you. He explored you, watched your reactions as he worked his tongue over you, devouring you like a starving man as you could do nothing but pull at his hair and scream. You really hoped his walls weren't too thin or else his neighbors would be getting quite the experience.  

He abused your swollen clit as one of his hands released your hip, instead coming to tease at your entrance with his fingers, pushing two inside of you and curling upward, searching for the spot that would leave you gasping and seeing stars. He found it soon enough, ripping a broken wail from your throat as he scissored his fingers, curling them again to hit that perfect spot paired with a particularly rough suck to your clit. If he kept this up you would lose your voice before he even fucked you, not that he seemed bothered by that as he doubled his efforts, pulling moans and gasps from your lips one after the other. Your grip in his hair must have been painful, but he didn’t falter as he added a third finger, curling up again and sucking hard. You were quickly approaching the edge, attempting to rock your hips against his tongue, but his grip was unyielding. You arched your back as he pushed you over the edge, tearing the most mind-blowing orgasm out of you that you’d ever had.  

You were panting, attempting to catch your breath as he pulled his fingers from you, kissing up your body until his lips found yours, shoving his tongue roughly into your mouth as your hands ventured down, slipping your fingers under the waistband of his joggers and palming his hardened erection through his boxers. He moaned into your mouth as he bucked into your hand, seeking more friction. Finally, he pulled away, hands going to his waistband and pulling the fabric down and over his hips, pulling his boxers with it as he dragged the garment down his thighs and off, dropping them to the floor. You stared at him, at his newly freed cock, your breathing becoming heavier and the desire to take him into your mouth rising from your chest. You wanted him to cum down your throat, wreck you beyond repair, ruin you for anyone else, you wanted to be claimed by him.  

“See something you want?” He asked in his cocky tone as he lowered himself over you again, his heavy cock grinding against your core in the most delicious of ways. You reached up and kissed him, wrapping your arms around his neck as you ground your hips up, absorbing his resulting hiss into your soul.  

“Thinking about choking on your cock.” You said bluntly, and you swear you saw him stall out.  

“Another time.” He choked out as he reached over to his bedside table, pulling open the drawer to retrieve one of the condoms inside. Ripping open the foil package he slid the condom over his hard cock, tossing the foil aside and lowering back down to your level, balancing himself on one elbow as the other hand reached down to align himself with your entrance as he placed a passionate kiss to your lips. He pushed the head inside, stretching you open as he pushed further. Your legs came to wrap around his waist as he slowly entered you. The burn was intoxicating as he stretched you, body conforming around his cock, welcoming him into your velvet walls, clenching around him and hearing him hiss against your lips. His pelvis met yours, fully seated inside of you, where he belonged as far as you were concerned as you adjusted to feeling of him so deep. He fit perfectly, like he was made for you, made for your body. You canted your hips up, and indicator for him to move as you moved to pressing hot kisses to his neck and jaw. He pulled almost all the way out before thrusting back in steadily, his breath catching in his throat. The next time he did it, he thrust back in a little faster, pulling a silken moan from your lips as he caged you in, a hand on either side of your head as once again he pulled nearly all the way out before thrusting back in quickly. You sucked in a breath at the impact as he did it again, his pace picking up as he repeatedly thrust in and out of your slick pussy.  

“Don't stop, don’t stop, don’t stop.” you chanted as your fingers wrung into the pillows behind your head, legs spreading as far as you could possibly get them as you tried to pull him deeper. He hooked his hand under your thigh, hiking it up further, allowing him to get that much deeper, ramming perfectly into that spot inside you and tearing a scream from your throat. He moaned into the flesh of your throat as you clenched around him.  

His pace quickened further, thrusting hard enough to shove you a few inches up the bed. You dug your fingernails into his shoulders, trying to get him closer as you arched your back into his chest, feeling your orgasm approaching once more. He bit into the flesh of your shoulder as his pace stuttered, a broken moan escaping his throat as he pulled you closer.  

Your orgasm hit like a tidal wave, crashing over you as you wailed out for him, chanting his name as he fucked you through it, thrusts becoming less organized as he neared his own collapse over the edge. He gasped into your ear as his own orgasm hit, cumming into the condom as you wrapped your arms around his neck, placing a kiss into his sweat dampened hair as he came down and slowed inside of you, but not yet pulling out.  

“Fucking Christ.” Chuuya panted against your throat, collecting himself.  

“Jesus had nothing to do with that.” You replied, earning the smallest of laughs. Slowly he pulled out of you, discarding the condom before collapsing next to you. You turned to your side, resting your head over his chest as you listened to his rapid heartbeat as it steadily slowed. “Not what I had expected to happen when I came over here.” You breathed. Chuuya huffed out a laugh above you.  

“Wasn’t on my to do list either.” Chuuya’s fingers drifting up and down your bare back as sweat cooled over your skin. “But if this is what happens after I use corruption from now on, I’ll have to find more excuses to use it.” You gave a halfhearted slap to his chest as you placed a kiss to his throat.  

****************** 

Your back hit the edge of your desk as Chuuya walked you backward, his hands on either of your hips and his tongue exploring your mouth as he kissed you. Your hands tangled in his hair as he slipped his hands under your shirt, teasing at the flesh just above your waistband. It was the first day of a new report season and your first day back in the office.  

“I love this skirt.” Chuuya murmured against your lips as he played with the hem of your skirt, a simple black pencil skirt that you’d had for years.  

“Just the skirt?” You asked.  

“Well, the girl inside of it is pretty nice too.” He joked, earning a playful slap to his chest as you kissed him again. it had been two weeks since that night and the two of you had been taking advantage of every spare moment to have your hands on each other, spending every night at one of your houses, more often than not ending up in bed together or that one time when he did actually fuck you on the floor, the two of you had never done anything in the office though, too afraid of getting caught, that anxiety suddenly rising back into your chest as your hands found his wandering ones, stilling them as you broke the kiss.  

“Best behavior at work.” You whispered.  

“I’m always on my best behavior.” He rebutted as the sound of a door opening broke into the silence of your little world.  

“Well, what do we have here?” Kouyou’s voice chimed through the air, forcing Chuuya to take a hasty step back. “Oh no need to act so surprised, I was wondering how long it would take, Chuuya I was expecting you to be faster.” You saw the blush rise to your boyfriend’s cheeks, alongside an annoyed glare shot toward his mentor.  

“You planned this didn’t you?” Chuuya deadpanned.  

Kouyou chuckled. “Don’t confuse me with Mori, boy. However, did I see a pretty girl and think, ‘she would be perfect for my little Chuuya’? Perhaps.”  

“Kouyou-” You started but were quickly cut off.  

“Anyway, important work to get to, you two have fun, no sex in the office please, or if you do, clean up after yourselves.” And with that she was gone, just the way she had come, leaving a very flustered couple in her wake.  

[palmviolet]

Hello!

I was wondering when we will get more “better by you, better than me?” Looking forward to more!

hello! i have been receiving a few of these asks and let me first say i'm very flattered by the continuing interest, i love that people are excited!

let me say secondly... i don't know haha. soon i think? my aim is to get working on it this month, which means it might start again in march... that's the hope. rest assured i have not abandoned it.

however i am quite possibly the busiest i have ever been! to summarise: Top Secret Novel is in the final editing stages before pitching it to publishers, i have two freelance jobs (both of which are trying to get me to take on more work, and both of which are writing jobs, which takes a lot of creative energy) And i need to maintain a social life or else i will decay and rot.

but the good news is! last night i finished drafting rope around the morning (the snowjanus fic), the final few chapters of which will be posted in the next two weeks. this means my sole fic focus is now better by you! so maybe you'll be seeing a snippet or two to reward your patience.

so glad people are still interested and please do bear with me while i figure out how to manage my hectic life....

[samhatch]

Chapter 7 is up!

The final installment of my Tamlin/Lucien slash fic is up on AO3!

I seriously had such a blast writing this, I didn't expect it to be so all consuming in my brain, haha! I've thought about nothing else for the last couple months, and I'm a little sad the journey is over.

But I'm planning on reading the rest of the ACOTAR series, and posting my first impressions here on tumblr. So if you're interested in my thoughts, please follow! The community here has been so fantastic, everyone is so passionate over these stories, it's amazing to be a part of. :)

Here's a sneak peak of the beginning of the chapter!

He was taken aback, unprepared for such a direct confrontation. Avoiding my eyes, he stared at his drink, bowing his head slightly in shame. “I deeply regret last night,” he said.  My mouth went dry, and my heart sank into my stomach. There was my answer, plain as day. Even though I’d just told myself I could bear the pain and bury my feelings, I wasn’t expecting the heartbreak to be this excruciating. I felt like I’d just been eviscerated, my guts spilling onto the floor. “I’m so sorry, Lucien,” he said. “It seems these days all I can do is hurt the people I love most.” He tried not to let his self-loathing show. But despite his glamor charms, I could see that he really believed he was only capable of inflicting pain. And it weighed on him heavily.  “I was so selfish,” he continued. “I never realized how much of a burden Fire Night was for you. I had fooled myself into thinking that…” he trailed off. “I mean, last night, when… No, let me start over.” He’d never been very good at articulating himself. I said nothing, and waited with bated breath for him to compose his thoughts.  “At Calanmai during the ritual, I was able to expel the magick and satisfy the spirits with Feyre. One coupling, and they were gone. It was such a relief, having my power back.” I felt the knife in my heart twist with his words. “But after the festival ended, we retreated to our bed. I laid next to her and I felt nothing. Only crushing emptiness, like a part of me was missing. It took me almost until dawn to understand what it was.” He finally raised his eyes to meet mine. “I realized that there was really only one person I wanted to share Fire Night with.” My breath caught in my throat. I looked at him in disbelief, too stunned to respond. “You deserved so much better than what I offered,” he finished.

Thank you again to everyone for your support! It means the world to me!

[fayes-fics]

20 Questions for Fic Writers!

I was tagged by @suspendingtime. Thanks my dear. 🫶🫶 Apologies I'm a little tipsy right now haha. 🤪

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

155. Ahem, hush you. I started writing 18 months ago. When I get a new hobby, I REALLY lean into it.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

481,485. Yup, almost half a million. Again, shhhh.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Only Bridgerton. Look, I have my hyperfixations, ok?

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

On AO3:

In His Lap (Short Fic) 181 

Temptation 177 

The Lesson 155 

Insatiable 149 

Are We Friends? 148

Tumblr notes:

Second Son 3,436

Sonnet #29 2,199

Rescue & Ruin 1,841

Awakening 1,827

Temptation 1,788

Wattpad readers:

Innocence, 30,600

Benedict Bridgerton Regency One Shots 23,000

Kinktober 2022 collection 16,300

Anthony Bridgerton Regency One Shots 10,400

Moments 5,800

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes. Always. It's just wonderful to get feedback. I read and respond to every single comment. They mean the world to me, truly.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably No Good Advice. I ended up writing Moments multi-chapter as I (and a friend) couldn't bear the idea they didn't end up together lolol.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them, tbh. I can't write an unhappy ending. Maybe the mushiest is Second Son, Moments, or It Had To Be You.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Luckily not much yet. I did get one hate anon early on. It wasn't about a specific fic, though. It said they didn't know why I had a 'please don't steal my work' disclaimer (the standard one that most writers here use) cos I was delusional that my work was worth stealing. 🤷‍♀️

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, it's my trademark. It's rare when I don't write smut. 😬 I'm not sure what is meant by kind of smut. I've written it all, from vanilla romantic sex to kink threesomes with harnesses and double penetration lol. I haven't had a request yet that I've turned down due to sexual content.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not yet. The closest I've gotten is It Had To Be You, which is based on When Harry Met Sally.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yes, sadly, it has happened quite a few times now. I was so fed up with filing copyright takedown notices that I set up a Wattpad account to try to counter it.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. I've been offered but have turned it down. I have no way to check that any translation would get across the nuance I aim for. So I know that may be anglo-centric, but its how I feel for now.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not yet, but I am always threatening to lolol.

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Hmm, tough one. I do love Kanthony tbh.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Benedict as a virgin. I just urghhh.... it's been a WIP for 17 months now. I just dunno why I won't finish it; I just get the feeling I won't.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I have no bloody idea. I'd prefer readers answer that tbh lol. My inclination is to say I don't have one, except perhaps a willingness to describe sex in ridiculous levels of detail? Is that a strength?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

World building. I will do anything to shortcut it. I'll find an economical way to describe a situation e.g. she's a widow; they're old friends. Got it? Good! Let's get down to business.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've done a smidgeon of French as I studied it for ten years. But I doubt I'd do another language tbh.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Only Bridgerton so far.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Bloody hell, I have no fucking idea. It literally changes depending on my mood. But I don't really care for my own writing that much, all I see is flaws lol. I guess the universe I would most like to write more for one day is Mrs Bridgerton and its sequel. Does that count?

No Pressure Tagging: A couple of my talented writing moots were tagged along with me on this (the lovelies @colettebronte and @eleanor-bradstreet). So lets go: @thebabblingbrookenook @fiction-is-life @ferns-fics @silverhallow @mothdruid @queen-of-the-misfit-toys @urchintoast 😁🧡🧡

[ladysomething]

atp I don't even know why I keep asking stuff as an anon. my identity has been revealed but fuck it.

one more time, let's do 5+1

1. Charles thinking he's the world's most clever person ever has me on the fucking floor. you go get them babe. yes, surely keeping the other idiot satisfied is only because you want to escape. of course sweetie. but question: are omegas more prone to their alpha, or that only goes so far and then they actually can control the feelings said alpha causes on them?

2. Max is an idiot, isn’t he? like, I actually want to open his brain to see how the fuck it works because I am amazed at its capacity (or lack of it/j)

3. I have a thing for the starved man comparision, and it's lovely to see such an accurate scenario for it. because Max actually short-circuited. he's just a man and Charles broke his brain in what? like, less than 5 minutes?

4. Carlos is a little rat, but I'm actually thankful that's he's not like. gross. (please, I'm begging you on my knees. don't make him or other drivers gross) I have this thing where I can kinda stand when oc are gross and little shits, but, even if some would consider said person a little shit (completely reasonable, people are allowed to not like drivers) I don't like it when on fics, they're outright assholes and disgusting craps, cause I don't know with certainity if they are like that irl. idiots and that I can do but over that is too much to bear for me. that's the point where I am reminded that they're real and that stuff. of course, is totally on you, and I don't expect anything, but picture me making puppy eyes at you on this one. and I was wondering, what is he? a beta or an alpha? it probably was said somewhere but I don't remember. because according to my reasoning, he's a beta because he was not in the auction. or was he?

5.I'm so fucking glad I chose wygig as this year's questionable fic. I love it and I have now developed a deep emotional dependence towards it. but haven't we all? (this is to say I love it)

+1. glad you're enjoying (I'm also trip anon btw) had I been in Italy, I would've loved to go to the bar to watch the race. even though I've never gone to watch a race at a bar in Rome, in Italy, depending on where you go, it can be really exciting and ehmmm... definetely an experience, may I call it that way. but sadly, first of all there's a four hour drive from Toscana to Rome and I would get my ass even flatter, and second I left months ago. maybe next time

and as you may have noticed, I gave up with trying to tell you how many points there will be in my ask. have a nice day Mads, enjoy your vacay hun!

look I'll honest. you say your identity has been revealed but you could be any of a handful of anons that have revealed their identity to me. so my terrible memory means that your secret is still safe!

wellllllll ... hm. omegas are definitely more SUSCEPTIBLE to their alphas e.g. with the alpha voice. but anything Charles feels is his real feelings.

haha Max IS an idiot, but so is Charles. they're two idiot peas in an idiot pea pod.

yeah no for real, Max's brain was completely broken. it was like Christmas morning for him haha

Carlos is a beta - basically everybody is a beta. there's only one person whose designation hasn't been revealed yet, but they're not a driver, so. you can pretty much just assume that everybody is a beta. as for making drivers assholes - I don't really do that in general, because usually it's too one dimensional for what I'm writing. it's fun in some scenarios (particularly shorter fics) but even the drivers who are currently 'villains' aren't outright bad people.

hahaha and at the rate it's going, it's length will mean it probably lasts half the year too haha

+1. yeah, I'm really excited!!!! I was kind of like ... if I can't go to Iola, then this is simply an experience I MUST have. cheering for ferrari while they're driving in Italy while I'M in Italy??? ahhhh.

thank you so much, you have a great day too!

[vertebrates-and-pieces]

Not sure if this is within the comfort zone or not. But how would Morgott respond to the notion of babies?

How would he react if his beloved brought up the idea that they would like to bear his children? How much coaxing would it take?

Alternatively, how would he respond if it was an abrupt pregnancy?

His beloved taking him somewhere quiet, and telling him that they are with his child. This having not been discussed prior to sex.

But they are happy...

Give us the juice!

Very sorry for the wait, had some nasty writer’s block last month, but slowly getting back in the groove and getting those writing juices flowing.

Okay so I was lowkey dreading getting an ask on this subject haha. It isn’t that it is really out of my comfort zone (Please don’t ask for pregnancy/breeding kink stuff on my NSFW blog though. That isn’t something I’m into, sorry.) but more of a topic I am heavily biased on. I personally find the idea of becoming pregnant or raising kids to be very unappealing and that is one of the few things I tend to project onto characters I like even when it is unrealistic to do so. 

It’s probably me subconsciously lashing out against the random people who go on about how great motherhood is and telling me “you’ll change your mind once you get married.” Like no. That sense of obligation is how you end up with so many parents that resent their kids, as well as me working on my personal feelings regarding the preservation of ways… Due to a long family tradition that goes back around 7-8 generations in which the firstborn daughter of each generation is to in turn name her firstborn daughter the same name. So I sort of grew up being told that I was going to have children, including at least one girl, and pass on the family name. And going through the realization that no. I do not want to do that was a big coming of age moment for me (Fortunately my family was pretty chill about it, so it isn’t exactly a traumatic conflict or anything)

But that’s neither here nor there.

Because honestly, I don’t think Morgott would be opposed to the idea of children, so I’m going to do my best to put my own projections aside and answer this in a more objective way.

…under the cut because I ended up going through several paragraphs of introduction before even getting to my thoughts on the matter oops

So I see Morgott as someone who would be relatively neutral on the subject of kids.

If things are in the state we see in canon, a broken world where he views himself as very much alone, I think he’d consider himself procreating as cruelty. A reviled omen bringing new, probably accursed, life into a world where nothing but hate and suffering awaits? No. That would be wholly unnecessary. Besides, the fewer distractions from his duties, the better.

However, after undergoing some character development, learning to accept both himself and others more, challenging the status quo, and in this case, falling in love, I doubt he’d see things the same way. Now that he has been set ablaze by a flame of his own: one of companionship, one of change and renewal, the world seems markedly brighter, and the outlook of a child born into it less bleak.

However, I don’t think it would be something he would consider right away. It is pretty clear that he’s gone his entire life thinking he would never have a family of any sort, so it probably wouldn’t be the first thing on his radar. I think he could be fine like that. I can see him being perfectly content as The Last of All Kings. Yet, now that he is loved, now that he understands that, now that he has brought into question tenets he once thought unbreakable, I’m sure his mind would wander.

If his love were to bring up a desire to bear his child(ren), I think he’d be a bit conflicted at first. He would need to take some time to work through some of his feelings on the matter. Would he make a good father, he’d wonder. Could he show a child the love they deserve after his lifetime of hate? I don’t think it would take too terribly much coaxing, but there would have to be a long discussion before he’d agree. One of the major points he’d bring up would be the possibility of the child being an omen. Not that he doubts his love would care for an omen child any less, but he cannot help but worry about the other concerns regarding the safety of both the child and the person giving birth to it. As we see with the Omen Bairns in game, Omens are born with their horns. More concerningly, the horns they are born with are no mere nubs or buds. They are jagged, pointy, and liable to do some serious damage. To give birth to an omen would be… traumatic. The thought that he could cause something to grow within his love that would hurt them so terrifies Morgott. What if they died? What if the child died? 

I do think after a good amount of discussion, and a healthy amount of reassurance that yes, this is really what they want, he would agree.

For he loves you so dearly, that if you consider this one of the greatest gifts he could bestow upon you, he will ensure it is so. And this great and profound love is something he looks forward to sharing with a child that you both created.

I think news of an unexpected pregnancy would result in similar initial terror. He would fall to his knees and hold them, worried that he may have just doomed them. They would ask him if he was okay and he would apologize. They’d hold him back, tell him that it will be alright, that they are honored, excited, to be with his child. And the genuine joy they show him. How they speak of looking forward to raising this child, to see Morgott as a father… He’s still shaking, but he is warm. He’s still crying, but his tears are not of grief.

[trailshome]

Progress Update: 9/4/24

Time flies when you're having fun -- supposedly. Can't say I've been having fun but time //is// flying so. Hm! Anyways! I wanted to give an end-of-the-month update on TLH!

TLH Chapter Two is currently sitting at roughly 1.5k words. It's much less than I would like, but I must remember that I scrapped some scenes and laid out plans for branching with the second version. I'm aiming for 12k minimum for this update, specifically, for the first chunk of Chapter Two (plus a minor addition to Greta's ending and tweaks to the previous Chapter Two sneak peek). Chapter Two: Chunk One will consist of two separate sections, one picking up where Gale and Hollond's ended and the other where Greta ended. Greta will also have a split branch to make up for a lack of choices in her update (probably). After that, four branches for the bulk of Chapter Two will lead to different scenarios. Obviously, this update is gonna be a hefty one so please bear with me while I try to maneuver irl stuff and writing, haha!! RIP to my once-a-month schedule, you were great while you lasted (2 months). I'll also be posting some lore posts on Patreon once I get them finished -- they will NOT be locked behind a paywall. However, I will be trying to be more active on there hopefully, so keep an eye out for that! Anyways!! That's all for now!! I'll try to post another progress update soon if not the first chunk of chapter two!! Thank you all so much, please stay safe and drink lots of water if possible!!

[nopeferatu]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love❤



OOF...well, since most of my favorite pieces of writing are eternal wips, I guess I'll just post the snippets here, haha. Please bear in mind that nearly all of them are over a year old, and none of them are very good—I do draw more than I write, after all. But I do dabble here and there and so yeah! This is some of that!

5. Untitled WIP

This is suuuper old, one of the first things I wrote after watching the movie again in early 2022 and falling deep down the rabbit hole. It's actually not that great and is pretty sad in it's entirety, so I tried to grab the better chunk, haha. Try, if you can, to mind the first person pov—I know better now.

It's been years and I still really miss you, Jack. All I known in life is the feeling a missing you. You think I'd get used to the feeling, what with all them months and miles between us in the before times, but this missing you runs so much deeper than these tired bones have ever known before.

Yanno how you said your Mama believed in the Pentecost? She ever tell you 'bout that Bible story, how God made Adam and Eve? It goes like this—the Lord took a big pile a sand and breathed into it to make Adam, then he took Adam's rib and from it, went on to make Eve.

Was thinking on it the other day and figured, what if that's how God made the two a us? What if he breathed life into a pile a horse shit, then when I came up, took my rib, put it in a rodeo fuck up and sent the two a us out to the world, pair a deuces trying to fnd their way? I always thought maybe this hurt was emptiness, where my heart went missing after you were gone 'cause you'd taken it like you took my shirt. Now I'm thinking, what if the pain's from that ol' rib coming back after you died to settle in where it don't belong no more? Tryna rearrange all my insides that gone without for so long, and my body's rejecting it like a horse rejecting rider 'cause it knows it don't belong to me no more, never did, neither.

Then again, maybe it's just busted up in there. Maybe it has been since the summer a '63, and I just ain't taken notice 'til you went on and met your maker.

Maybe this ol' heart's just broken.

Know I shouldn't be asking shit from you considering all the ways I took and didn't give you nothing but hurts in return, but I’m asking as a man who never asked for nothing from you, neither—you wait for me, Jack Twist, just a little longer. Used to say that I couldn't wait to see you again, but you helped give me a second shot, try and fix up what I didn’t think I could hardly stand no more. Now I know I can bid my time here a while longer, being a daddy and granddaddy, living out some a the life that you didn't get to have.

So you wait for me… even if it's just so I can tell you how God damn sorry I am for it all.

I love ya, little darlin'. Reckon I always have, reckon I always will. You enjoy them whiskey rivers, but make sure to save the last round for me.

4. Want

This snippet is also super old, and once again, forgive me for the first person pov. Ik a lot of ppl don't typically like it in fiction and I've also kind of grown unfond of it. I was young! I was dumb! I've learned I've learned I've learned!!!

As I'm crying and coughing up the blood from my lungs into my mouth, the second thought comes to mind: just how bad I want for Ennis to come find me, come and save me from what I know's coming next. But he weren't there. Never was, never would be. The tears came down harder 'cause a that one.

The very last impossible thing I wanted was something I dreamed of for a long time. Even though most everything I craved was outta reach, I always thought I could get it, somehow, some way if I tried hard enough. But from the very start I'd known this want was impossible, and yet sometimes I wanted it more than I wanted life itself.

Dying alone on the side a that hot Texas highway, all I wanted was to be nineteen again, close enough to touch the Heavens on Brokeback Mountain.

I thought I could hear Ennis hollering for me back at camp, and I smiled. I'm comin', cowboy.

Then I closed my eyes, and would never want for nothing again.

3. Untitled WIP

I really hope to finish this one, someday. I really like playing around with the other potential bad end of BBM, where Jack ditches Ennis for Randall after May 1983 because his hope and patience has run dry.

"Name's Randall. Educated type of fella, went to college, got him a job as foreman of the ranch down a ways from my place." Jack takes a deep breath, sighs it out. "Tells me he loves me more times 'n even Lureen's said it," he stays quiet a moment, kicks at the loose pebbles on the ground. "Tell you what—feels good to hear it, too. Man's gotta know he's loved ever now 'n' again, Ennis."

Ennis thinks of cold mountain nights filled with the bleating of sheep and illegal elk, of dozens of jobs taken and abandoned, of divorce; thinks of four years of missing and bruising kisses, of sixteen years of hands worshiping at the temple of a bull rider's broken body, and of every cold night in between filled with dreams about bright blue eyes and the warmth of a perfect smile. He thinks of the last twenty years he spent dropping everything at the siren call of a postcard, and for the first time in his life Ennis thinks about love; wonders what it might be, if not that.

But Ennis doesn't say so, just clenches his trembling fist even tighter into itself.

2. Five Boys that Jack Twist Had Liked (and One More Whom He Had Loved)

This one is another old one that I reaally hope to finish one day. I have a about 3 1/2 of the 6 part written, I just...need to find the gumption to get through the rest.

4. Andrew Peterson

Andrew had been one of his daddy's ranch hands, a boy who would've been two grades above him if Jack hadn't dropped out of high school his sophomore year. He had just graduated, was one of the lucky few whose parents didn't value his contribution to the family finances over his education, and was hired on for the summer in the hopes of making a little cash before heading out of their dead-end town and into the real world. It was a plan that Jack, at sixteen, had already been well acquainted with.

It wasn't often that the Twist Ranch hired hands around his age to help out around the place, and Jack, always the friendly type and more than just a little lonely, had been eager to make a new acquaintance. Andrew hadn't seemed to mind when Jack started taking his chores alongside him, appearing glad for the company, himself. They shared easy smiles and private jokes, becoming such good friends in such a short time that his Mama would tease about one of them losing their very shadow if the other wasn't around.

Just like with Stephen before him, Jack had been drawn to Andrew like a moth to a flame. He never understood what there was in a boy that drew his eye to them in a way that none of the fillies who flirted around with him ever did, until Andrew, after a tiring day mending the old fence posts that corralled the bulls in and about two months worth of dropping frustrated gestures and signals, had said, "Fuck it," pulled Jack out to his Daddy's feed barn and into a scalding kiss that left Jack weak in the knees.

Andrew hadn't been his first kiss—that honor had gone to lil' Miss Sharon King back in the first grade. Seeing as how Jack was well regarded amongst the ladies as a 'pretty boy', there'd been plenty of kisses after that, too. Andrew had, however, been the first kiss that finally had him understanding what all the fuss was about.

As if to slide it on home, later that summer he even made sure to be Jack's first fuck, rounding out on all the bases that left Jack with a whirlwind of questions about himself and even more feelings bursting inside than his young heart ever thought it could handle.

"Been savin' to go to school in Denver," Andrew started, breaking the silence one night out in the feed barn. They sat passing a cigarette and some of his daddy's stolen whiskey between them, riding out the residual high of a midnight roll in the literal hay. It had been dark out, and with only the full moon and the hot red cherry at the end of the cigarette bathing them in their glow, the two were effectively shielded from the scathing eyes of the light. "'m leavin' in a few months, splittin' before fall comes." His gaze was fixed somewhere on the black horizon, watching something that went unseen to Jack.

Jack felt his stomach sink like the stones he used to skip in the creek way out past his house.

"Denver? Ain't that a might bit far for some schoolin'?" He tried to laugh, but it came out sounding choked and strange. Instead, he looked down into the whiskey bottle in his hand and took a swig from it, willing its sweet burn to help him maintain an air of indifference. "What they got down there, anyway?"

Truth be told he didn't blame Andrew for wanting to go—he had been itching to leave Lightning Flat in the rearview, himself. Still, he was unsure that he wanted the conversation to continue. He didn't want to think about his new companion leaving so soon after this something between them had begun. Nevertheless, curiosity—slightly embittered—took hold and ultimately won out.

Andrew took a long drag out of the cigarette. Its hot cherry burned a bright, fiery red before dulling once more to an ashy gleam. "A chance for fellas like us," he finally breathed. The smoky tendrils made their escape past his lips, taking his words with them.

"Oh," Jack muttered after a beat of silence. He wasn't quite sure he understood, nor wanted to understand, what Andrew was getting at, but tried hard not to let his disappointment seep out into his tone regardless.

It hadn't worked. In a moment, Andrew smashed the lit butt out against the wall, leaving them cloaked in darkness once more before leaning over to kiss him sweetly. It had knocked the breath out of Jack, just like their kisses were wont to do.

"Maybe someday you can come pay me a visit. I dunno, it might just be a sweet life down there, yanno?" Andrew's smile, only barely visible under the glow of the full moon above, was easy and inviting.

For once all motormouth Jack could do was smile back before eager hands, warm like the end of the cigarette and the whiskey settled deep in his belly, were on him again, ready to reignite the fire that set Jack aglow.

That summer, Andrew had pressed red-hot marks into his flesh that would soon fade on the outside but sear into Jack's soul for a lifetime, forever branding him as the different sort of boy he had been both warned about and accused of being in the entirety of his short life.

Looking back, he realized he'd known what Andrew had meant all along. At sixteen years old Jack knew what queer was, and finally understood, with no room for doubt in his mind, that it was him. He reckoned that weren't nobody's business but his own, though.

After that summer, Jack never did see Andrew again.

Twenty-four years later, tucked cozy warm into his Colorado bed, Andrew would awake from a dream about blue eyes and wonder, not for the first time, what had ever happened to the kid who'd been his that one short summer before making the move that forever changed his life. Looking beside himself, into the handsome face that had laid dreaming beside him every night the past fifteen years, Andrew would smile and hope that, wherever Jack Twist was in the world, he had gotten out of Wyoming and been lucky enough to make his own bit of bliss out of the hard hand he'd been dealt.

1. Clipped

Summary: Tomorrow may tell another story, but for tonight, this man—with his baby blue eyes, sleepy, self-conscious grumbles, and beautiful clipped dick—was his, all his, and that was enough. It had to be enough.

Aaand here's a fic I've actually posted! Lol! Fun fact: this was actually the very first fic I wrote following watching bbm again in January 2022, and it remains like. The only thing I'm actually super duper proud of. It isn't even that good, but I'm just proud that I actually finished something for once lol.

Thanks for the ask, @alifeasvivid! :D

[likelightinglass]

Fic Stats Tag Game

Rules: Give us the links to your fic with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and fic with the least words.

Thanks for the tag @danpuff-ao3 this looks fun!

Most Hits

In which Severus is stressed and needs Daddy to treat him like a dumb little cumdump. We're both gay and obsessed with tender, intimate kink; moved, we wrote this fanfic

Summary:

Severus spends a morning serving Daddy like a proper little cockslut, since that's what he's good at. Lucky for him, Daddy loves him that way.

Yeah I see all you perverts out there. So many hits on this one and comparitvely so few comments and kudos--and twice as many private bookmarks as public!

I think this may be the fic of mine people seem most ashamed to have read. But I hope people enjoyed it nonetheless haha.

This was so fun to write and it was a hoot to explore some very niche kinks. It was a blast to cowrite with the wonderful alhaz and that excellent naming convention was my crazy idea. I still get such a kick out of it whenever I see it.

Second Most Kudos

World Enough, and Time

Summary:

Soulmate clocks start ticking when you first lock eyes, and count down until your time with them is over. Harry’s starts ticking on September 1st, 1991. He has only six years, eight months, and one day.

This is secretly my favorite fic. I wrote it all at once stream of consciousness style while out shopping. This fic brought to you by eating fast food in my car in a parking lot.

I love the soulmate trope and I loved this take on it. And I am quite pleased with myself that I took the angst and managed a happy ending anyway!

This one had a recent popularity spike due to the amazing podfic by Cailynwrites!!! I am so grateful for it.

Third Most Comments

What Comes Next (and How to Like it)

Summary:

A choose your own adventure fic!

You are Severus Snape. You survived against all odds, and now it's time to take life into your own hands. What will you do with this gift of a second chance, and how will you find your happy ending?

Your happy ending is pretty much always Harry Potter, but there's so many fun ways to get there.

I was so inspired by @lizzy0305 's Choices that I just had to write my own choose your own adventure fic. I am so insanely proud of this one although the plotting was a bear haha. It was very fun writing basically a bunch of mini fics and using so many different tropes. And I got to give Severus over a dozen different happy endings. It's what he deserves.

I feel like this one doesnt get as much love--maybe the interactive nature of it can be off putting? But its one of my favorite things that I have ever wrote and the fic i tend to self rec the most. Most of the comments on this are telling me what their favorite endong was and its so nice to see! Especially since several have been recieved unexpectedly.

Fourth Most Bookmarks

So actually World Enough, and Time again but it is SO CLOSE to More Than Dark, I'm cheating a tiny bit in order to pimp this one out

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31757209/chapters/78608503

More Than Dark

Summary:

Severus is imprisoned in solitary confinement in Azkaban with no idea of who won the war. He is ill, underfed, and slowly losing his mind.

When Harry eventually takes him in and nurses him back to health, he can scarcely believe it's real.

My white whale. My magnum opus. My only published WiP. It haunts me every day that it remains unfinished. I promise its not abandoned, I love it so much and I've written and outlined so much of it but its going to be novel length (in a thousand years when its done) and its been over a year since the last update. I am pouring my heart and soul into this one and its jjst taking a really. Really. Really long time. But if anyone likes WiPs, please try it. I think its one of my best.

Fifth Most Words

Sly and Songful

Summary:

One of the those animagus fics, in which our heroes would rather secretly spy and pine instead of just have an honest conversation.

But where would the fun in that be?

Everyone lives AU, in which you will encounter birds, foxes, pining, stubbornness, falling in love, and scars.

This was one of my first ever fics and it was a birthday present for the magnificent @bleedcolor .

I loved working on this and feeling like I was finally writing a "real" fic with a plot and everything. Its got nightingale animagus Harry and fox animagus Snape and gnarly scars and its very soft and probably a little out of character and amateur but I love it very much.

Theres also a sequel to this, A kind of love called maintenance that I am particularly proud of.

I also commissioned art of this one from Madfantasy! I will reblog it now so it appears right above :)

Fic with the Least Words

AITA for not going down on my boyfriend?

Summary:

Severus takes to the internet to determine if he is, in fact, the asshole.

This was inspired by my obsession with Reddit's Am I the Asshole? And a conversation with Zalil after her spectacular fic where we agreed her fic's Severus was an incredibly selfish lover. It still makes me laugh, I added a couple "in charachter" comments and encouraged others to do so, got some hilarious ones back! If anyone reads this, please comment in the style of AITA hahah.

Tagging: @bleedcolor @perverse-idyll @coconutice22 @givereadersahug @lizzy0305 and absolutely anyone else who wants to!!!