#this is just regular thirst trap now lol

[itsmeglycine]

Mermaid Nick

trust me anon i've tried and failed too many times with the tail... hope this is okay

[misc-obeyme]

Hey cc

So in the vampire pop quiz I think it was Dia who said something very interesting "looks like they are fixated on mc because mc is the manifestation of their desires" now that did align well with my effort to understand why would all 7 of them be this obsessed lol

Anyway in my head mc goes like guys that's just my idea of how a proper human should be lol pretty sure if any other human ended up here who kinda like hot demons you all would be obsessed about that human too

Anyway, can I request a drabble about this kind of mc not insecure, just not understanding why mc deserving all this attention

Barb would be interesting to drabble about this since it took him sooooo looooong to open up to mc a bit

happy to see you are still having fun with Barbs thirst trap 😎

-🐆

Hi there, 🐆 anon! I apologize for the delay on this - it's been taking me a little longer than I anticipated to get through the drabble requests...

Augh the Barbatos shower picture is going to be the death of me, I swear. I'm still thinking about a nsfw drabble based on one of his lines lkasdfkjfj it's a problem, I swear.

Anyway, here's a Barb drabble with MC not getting why the demons are obsessed with them! I thought it was a cute little scenario. And Barb is just being super romantic as always lol. I can't help it, I am but a humble fluff writer.

Barbatos could see it on your face - a subtle expression that the others might not pick up on. It told him the story of how you were trying your best to hide your own confusion. It was something that happened every time one of the brothers complimented you, when they fought over you, when they expressed this need to always be near you. A slight furrow of your brow, the tiniest downturn of your lips, the fleeting uncertainty that flashed through your eyes.

Ever since your first day in the Devildom, Barbatos had seen this look. He was always watching you. The more he did, the more it became clear to him that you didn't understand why everyone seemed to think there was something special about you.

Perhaps he waited too long. Perhaps he should have mentioned it to you sooner. But you didn't seem distressed. All he ever saw was bafflement. So he let it be for quite some time. Until he finally found himself alone with you when it displayed itself.

Barbatos had been pouring you a cup of tea as he heard about the brothers' latest antics. You were telling him that they had been arguing over who got to work with you on an upcoming school project.

"And then Levi got involved and I had to calm everybody down before Lotan was summoned," you said.

You were looking down at the table, your mind clearly elsewhere, when that expression flashed across your face.

Barbatos put down the teapot. "Does it make you uncomfortable, MC? When they argue over you this way?"

You met his eyes, seemingly startled by his question. "No," you said. "It's a little silly, but it doesn't make me uncomfortable. Why do you ask?"

"It's only that I've noticed the look of confusion you sometimes have in moments like these," Barbatos said. "As if there's something that troubles you about it."

You frowned in thought for a moment. "I guess I just don't understand why they care so much? Why do they think I deserve this much attention? I just act like a regular human would. Why are they so… obsessed?"

Barbatos chuckled. "Do you truly not see? This is exactly what makes you so fascinating."

"I don't know what you mean," you said.

"Despite being a totally unique individual, you still believe you are ordinary," Barbatos said gently. "I have been alive for a long time, MC. I have met many humans. No two are alike. You are not 'regular' because there is no such thing. You are yourself and that is why we love you."

Barbatos was pleased to see that confused look replaced by a soft blush. "You…?" you couldn't finish your question.

Barbatos took your hand and kissed the back of it. "Indeed," he said. "Even I have fallen under your spell. I will remind you of how special you are for the rest of your life if I must."

You laughed, a little taken aback. "I don't think that's going to be necessary."

Barbatos only smiled, your hand still clasped in his. He was content to see such a soft and sweet expression on your face, a glint of happiness in your eyes. Despite what you said, if he ever did see that confusion there again, he would do everything he could to bring your smile back instead.

masterlist | Thank you for reading!

[oswaldsleftbicep]

Hi!

I just saw that you have 0 requests, so imma give you one:)

How do you think would the boys insta profiles look like? Like their posts oder their stories..

You can show it with pictures like you did at that other request.. if it is easier for you;) Greetings

the boys and their insta profiles!

the way i ran to pinterest as soon as i read this ask-

i decided to go with instagram since that's the social platform i use most, also i have officially decided that the brothers' last name is morningstar lol

all images found on pinterest!

genre: other

cw: mature themes in ricardo's, language

❧ he's basically a social media influencer

❧ he posts about the places he travels to and the shenanigans he gets up to with his friends

❧ on his stories he'll post his friends' content, little updates, and any memes he finds funny

❧ he'll also boost any social movements/local efforts, uses his platform for good

❧ wanted to make a dark academia aesthetic page but that was too much effort

❧ also thought about doing a book review page, but that was also too much work

❧ ended up getting a lot of attention from lucia's fans who comment on his posts thinking it'll get lucia's attention?? so levy has the word "lucia" banned from his comments lmao

❧ his stories are full of historical content, and he absolutely follows a "this day in history" type page

❧ most people think his page is some sort of arg, cryptic mystery

❧ his followers have tried to reverse image search his post, thinking it's ai or from a video game, but it's completely original and taken by mefy

❧ where is this place? why did he take it? why does the caption only say "time is running out"? why is he verified??

❧ added to the mystery is the fact that the year on the post is years before instagram was launched mefy hacked the app to do that, he just likes fucking with people

❧ had kurt help him set up his account lol

❧ all of his captions are complete sentences, it's very old man of him

❧ posts mainly about nature and his garden, and he'll show off anything that kurt makes him

❧ on his story he'll post inspirational quotes

❧ only has this account to keep an eye on lucia and kurt

❧ he also follows levy, mefy, and oswald

❧ mefy doesn't follow him back

❧ doesn't intend to post anything ever, he just doesn't see the point

❧ goes live a lot to do readings and horoscopes once a week

❧ keeps his regular posts to a minimum, but posts a lot on his story about space, nature, and astrology

❧ lowkey the only reason why he's got so many followers is because lucia beefs about him a lot on his page

❧ now there's a whole team lucia vs team mikael feud going on in their mini fandom

❧ lemme hear you say thirst traps!!

❧ the only reason he's so famous is because he's hot and an asshole

❧ every now and then he'll post his gun and if it gets taken down within a week, he'll let a random follower choose his next tattoo

❧ he's technically also a social media influencer, but for all the wrong reasons

❧ the link in his bio leads to his other socials, paypal/venmo, and an only fans

❧ ricardo lowkey talked him into getting an account so he can cyberbully him

❧ doesn't know what he's doing; looked up "profile pictures" and picked the first one he found amusing

❧ same thing with his singular post, and the caption is simply "this is funny"

❧ his followers are mikael, ricardo, oswald, and lucas, whom he follows all back as well as a cat meme page

❧ another influencer who got famous for his pretty boy aesthetic and howl pendragon vibes

❧ none of his followers know his location, and they cannot for the life of them figure it out; it's similar to mefy's page where all his posts are completely original, but nobody knows where they were taken

❧ also uses his platform for good, and the link in his bio leads to a bunch of activism resources and articles

❧ this is his main page, just a bunch of middle school shenanigans

❧ has a spam account that's really popular at his school; it's basically a school meme page with regular memes sprinkled in

❧ he also secretly runs his school's shoot your shot page

❧ complaints about his job on his story but always forgets that kaim follows him lmao

[sunnydayjackass]

gives you dat side eye got any kink hcs?

Oh I absolutely do, and I'm down to get into all of that more in time but for now, since this wasn't super specific, so consider this like a basic sampling. Have one for everyone- Joseph included. Just because.

Jack

Size kink. Jack absolutely adores if you're smaller than him. From the way his hands so easily engulf yours to how large they look tracing over your body or stretching you out around his digits, the way your body clings to him and can be so easily caged under him or pinned? It reminds him that he can protect you, that you're so delicate, that he can lift you and position you with such ease... in the bedroom, against the wall, hoist you up onto the counter tops or any elevated surface and you've still got to look up at him. Those big starry eyes of yours peeking out under those lashes just drive him absolutely wild. Ever the patient and gentle giant, Jack loves sinking his cock into you so slowly, watching you take each bit of him within your depths- how your stretch to accommodate him, how you clench and spasm around his cock so needily, you're so eager to be filled as your gummy walls try to flutter and entice him in faster to brush against those bundles of nerves to see stars. But Jack knows you need to accommodate to his size, he'd loathe to hurt you and he'd be remiss if he ever missed out on such a lascivious view.

Joseph

Dirty Talk. Now I know much isn't known about Joseph (at least by me so if anyone has any tidbits of info feel free to share lol) but the man can talk absolutely fucking filthy. He's a wordsmith- those lips and silver tongue work wonders on the regular; at work, in the bedroom, between your legs. He'll murmur them into your ear at the most inopportune times to rile you up, blushing all the way to the tips of your ears. And he'll do so doubly during foreplay and sex. "Look at you drooling around my cock with that pretty mouth...gonna fuck that little throat of yours...you look so good all cockdrunk like this." Joseph's purrs are sultry, there's sometimes a teasing lilt to the alluring low timbre of his voice that has you weak in the knees. And he's a man of his word- Joseph makes good on every sinful promise he growls or pants into your ear, what kind of lover would he be if he left you hanging like that after all? The dirty talk naturally can range to whatever's more your forte; praise, teasing, degradation or a mix of all three. Joseph is attentive to any detail that arouses you.

Ian

Somnophilia. To say that Ian had been shy and embarrassed to admit that he liked the idea of you fooling around with him or him fooling around with you while you were asleep was an understatement. But you’d soothed him through it- he liked what he liked, was looking to you for consent, joking with him it’s the most loving morning alarm to have. Part of it is the excitement; of having to be quiet and so careful with your body so he doesn’t rouse you too early but it also gives him ample time to appreciate your body, the soft hue of your nipples, the dips and curves of your body, how he delicately strokes your sex and seeing your sweet sleepy responses. Soft whimpers, your body responding so eagerly to his gentle hands and mouth- it’s really a thrilling experience because he’s usually shy to initiate. But if you’re the one acting on it- you’re just as gentle if not slower with your feather light touchings. You push a little and pull away, to keep him at bay, edging him and coaxing him along until he’s hard- heavy and flush in your palm or mouth that he groggily rouses from he thought to be a fantasy dream only to see you already at work. He keens hoarsely, catching his lower lip between his teeth as he takes in the sight of you between his legs, blankets bunched about. “...please...please don’t be a dream.”

Shaun

Roleplay/cosplay. The trend of Ghostface selfie thirst traps? Shaun may not have invented the trend but he perfected it. There’s a whole album of them in your phone that he’s sent you, some of you together playing his poor little victim sometimes making ahegao faces in the photos while he fake holds up your head by your hair. There’s just something hot about fucking in a costume. It can be as simple as you coming to the bedroom as a sexy version of one of the iconic final girls or Shaun dressed as a prolific horror slasher (if you have a mask kink- he’s the man for you). But he’s not opposed to the classics either- if you wore cat ears and a cute little tail plug, Shaun would be over the moon and get you a very special collar. He loves when the pair of you throw around little nicknames and pet names in these romps. For you things like “kitten” or “good girl” he keeps it relatively simple- and you best believe this man is defo a top and a (soft) dom as well but he’s happy to change it up to whatever you want and gets you off good. If you’re into it, getting into character, the sex likely skews a little rougher if you’re comfortable with it, a large hand at your throat, fisted in your hair, slaps to your ass until a visible imprint lingers on your skin of Shaun’s hand. Though of course after, he’s an absolute king of aftercare. Cleaning you gently, whispering praise into your ear, cuddling you up nice and snug.

[bruciemilf]

I was thinking about your streamer au and since bruce is in the cave and the theres bats but they mostly stay on the ceiling, they make noise here and there so people think Bruce listens to bat noises on a regular (it adds to his mystery) and they start sending him bat noise audios they find that they think he’d enjoy. Also thinking about it being in the cave would there be times where Bruce turned the camera to the side or something and everyone’s customers are just on full display. Also on another note the batkids definitely block the Bruce Wayne tag after he posts a new stream so they don’t get flooded with thirst traps.

IM - YES??? and you just KNOW bruce is enough of a dummy to do that too, lol. That's how the " Bruce is actually a hyperfanatic batman stan" theory gets out, and Bruce has to more or less CONFIRM IT NOW which Alfred finds absolutely hilarious

Just imagine Bruce, eyes pale and dead, in the most monotone voice, doing a Batcave tour. "And , - that's not the REAL batmobile. Which - why would It be? God, I'm such a nerd. "

AND PLEEEEEEASE NOT THE THIRST TRAPS - they're all accidental too. Like, Bruce could be stretching out his numb arms after playing for a hellish amount of time, " But I have to be quiet because Alfred thinks I'm asleep,-" and the chat is just going ARMS ARMS ARMS ARMS CHOKE ME CHOKE ME NOW

Or God forbid Bruce wears a tank top (a superman one...suspiciously big...) and he's positioned in a certain angle, because then it'd show off a bit of his pecks and then itd be TITS! TITS ON MY FACE! TITS NOW!

He always blushes so much when it happens. It just FEEDS into the storms of fancams. His children are SO tired they just want to enjoy their dads voice and succumb to a gentle grave of nostalgia is that too much to ask for?!?!?!

[honeytae]

I love when you talk nurturing to me.

hello my loves, happy wednesday! welcome back to regular uploads (rip thirst week lol) and you know what that means...mega fluff. this particular piece was requested by a few different people, but it was all the same general idea: DOTING. ON. JUNGKOOK. which is just...such a dream, right? anyways, i hope you all enjoy this. thanks to my requesters who have waited SO patiently for this to be written, i hope it was worth it!!!

tags: @ahgasearmyfan, @hoseokayy, @the1921-monsters genre: fluff warnings: jungkook’s tired and kind of overworking himself :( oc takes care of him though bc duh word count: 2.6k

Jungkook hated his boots. 

Well, not all the time. Most of the time, Jungkook loved his boots. 

But right at this moment, he hated how heavy they were, weighing him down further than his already sore muscles as he trudged up the stairs to your numbered doorway. 

Huffs escaped him every other step as he gripped the railing for support, letting his head roll to the side with a close of his eyes once he’d successfully made it through the fire and ache that was his muscles right now. 

After fiddling with your stubborn lock and door handle, he sighed in relief as he entered your place, pouting a bit as he heard you clanging pots and pans in the kitchen. Glancing at his phone, he supposed it was dinner time. But he wanted nothing to do with food and everything to do with you. 

Kicking off his shoes, he slid his phone back into his pocket, rolling his shoulders back as well as his neck. The burn eased only slightly from the action. This was worse than he’d felt in a while. 

The pout stayed on his lips as he shuffled into the kitchen, pausing in the doorway for a second to watch as you stirred something over the stovetop, shifting your face over the open pot every once in a while to make sure you were doing it right. 

The action made him feel slightly less tired and all the more fond, a gentle greeting smile from you brightening his attitude almost completely before he tried to take another step toward you, calf tightening into a painful cramp as he hissed in a breath through his teeth. 

You immediately frowned in concern, taking the initiative to walk the one step to close the gap between you, wrapping your arms around him and letting out an ‘oof’ as he rested his body weight on you. 

“Hi.” Jungkook mumbled through his pout, hair hanging into his eyes and blocking his full expression from your view. 

Even without seeing the man, you could tell he wasn’t in his regular mood, heavy on his feet with nothing left to give. It irked you, seeing him like this. 

“Hi. You okay?” You wondered aloud, a question you fully knew the answer to as you sneakily reached your arm back to turn the heat down on the burner, allowing the food to rest a bit while you investigated your boyfriend’s serious lack of Jungkook. 

“Mm. Tired.” He replied flatly, shrugging a bit as his eyes drooped to stare back at you. 

Frowning as he remained uncharacteristically silent after his brief answer to your question, you tucked some of his long strands back behind his ear, sighing through your nostrils at the dark circles the action revealed to you. 

He was tired. He was so fucking tired.

Quickly making the executive decision to move the pot to a completely cold burner, you turned back around to place your hands on his chest, letting an arm slide around his back to support his slumped frame. 

The man’s face remained unmoving as you encouraged his other arm to rest around your neck, your boyfriend grunting as the motion strained his muscle but sighing nonetheless at the relief it gave him. Finally, he didn’t feel quite as heavy as when he was holding himself up.

“C’mon, baby. Let’s get you cleaned up.” You tugged at the hand of his arm resting on your shoulder gently, letting his exhausted body lean on you as you retreated down the hallway.

“Thank you.” He spoke weakly, melting into you further as you dipped your head to press a kiss to the hand resting upon your shoulder, his fingers stroking at your shirt in response. 

Leading him into the bathroom, you propped the sleepy man against the counter, popping out of the room only momentarily to grab a towel from the hallway closet, placing it beside the sink for him and walking over to the shower to play with the water temperature.

“Shower or bath?” You asked to the man behind you, hand hovering over the nozzle to adjust the setting as he let out a deep sigh. 

“Shower. I think I’d fall asleep in a bath.” He admitted sheepishly, making you chuckle a bit before nodding. 

“Shower it is, then.” 

As you switched the stream of running water from tub to shower head, the spray of the water against the tub drowned out almost every other noise, even the soft hum coming from your throat as you pulled the curtain all the way back for easy access inside. Holding your hand out to the man, you gestured for him to come to you with a fold of your fingers, Jungkook easily following your lead as he trudged over to you. 

“Hi, lovey.” You greeted him again, softer this time as you slid your hand underneath the hem of his shirt to grip the fabric. Leaning forward to catch your lips with his, he planted a soft kiss to the flesh, the action gentle and tired as he tried to relay the gratefulness he felt in this moment. Pulling back with a slight smile, you lifted your eyebrows as your boyfriend chuckled at you.

“What?” You asked, making him laugh a bit more and only increasing your confusion. 

“Every time we kiss you act like it’s the first time.” He commented, a bit of teasing in his tone as he smirked a bit back at you. 

You let out a scoff at his words, lifting the material of his shirt to trap his head in the fabric and making him let out a loud laugh at the action. The moment was the first positive sign you’d seen since he arrived home, making your heart feel content as you smiled at his hidden face beneath the cotton. Releasing his head from the shirt, you tossed the black tee to the ground, Jungkook taking the lead on his shorts as he shoved them and his underwear down his thighs. 

“It feels like the first time every time.” You said softly, stepping aside so that Jungkook could make his way into the basin.

“For me too,” he smiled, “you coming?” He referenced the running shower, an open invitation to join the man behind the curtain with pleading doe eyes. 

“Mm, I should finish dinner so that when you get out-”

“Please?” He pouted again, making you blow a breath out past your lips before caving.

“Okay. I’ll be back in a moment, you get in and start without me.” You instructed, the man grinning a bit before stepping into the tub, letting out an immediate sigh at the ease of the water pounding down on his sore back. 

Walking into your bedroom, you quickly made your way over to his drawer in your dresser, picking out another one of his black t-shirts and boxers for him to sleep in and setting them out on the bed. 

Making your way back to the bathroom with an extra towel in hand, you held back your own yawn as you stepped inside the already steamy air of the bathroom, the curtain left the slightest bit open for your expected return.

Peeling your shirt up over your head, you dropped it onto the group of Jungkook’s clothes, letting your shorts slide down your legs to join the pile before pulling the curtain back a bit more. The action revealed a very dry Jungkook, leaning against the tile wall instead of underneath the water like you’d been expecting. Scoffing at his smirk as you stepped into the shower, you gestured to his dry strands of hair, raising your eyebrows in amusement. 

“You were supposed to start without me.” You commented on the barely wet hair framing his face, the man full-on grinning at you as he pulled your body closer to his, guiding you both underneath the stream of water. 

“Now why would I do that?” He asked teasingly, giggling when you shook your head at him. 

“You’re annoying. Give me the shampoo.” You ordered, another big smile twisting at the man’s lips as he dutifully nodded, grabbing the bottle of your shampoo from behind him before you stopped him with a grasp on his wrist.

“Yours, love.” You directed him, pointing to the sweet-smelling shampoo Jungkook adored, having become his favorite shortly into staying over with you and now referred to as ‘his’ by the both of you.

“I wanna wash your hair.” He pouted, you swiping the unfavorable expression off with a kiss to his chin before reaching over to retrieve the shampoo you’d directed him to get. 

“Another time. Right now I need to get you clean and in bed.” You said authoritatively, the man raising his eyebrows in amusement as you squeezed a dollop of the shampoo onto your palm. 

“Aw, babe. I love when you talk nurturing to me.” He smirked, a chuckle exhaled out your nostrils at his words. 

“Yeah, yeah. Just shut your eyes, unless you want me to burn them with this cherry blossom shit.”

After you were done washing his hair, having to occasionally pause to direct his hands back to your hips from where they sometimes started wandering over your body throughout, you began lathering the bottle of body soap in your hands, rubbing down his arms and torso and all around his back to wash away the sweat and aches from his day. 

“Why won’t you let me touch you?” He practically whined after you moved his hand off your stomach the fourth time, letting you pick his arm up to run the water along the limb and successfully run the soap off. 

“Because I know it won’t end there. And I need to get you to bed, remember?” You tutted, placing one more kiss to his jaw before leaning over to shut the water off, setting your hand on his back to encourage him out of the shower. 

His legs didn’t budge, hand collecting your own to stubbornly guide you out ahead of him. 

“You first.” He emphasized as you remained standing in the tub, rolling your eyes with a sigh before you stepped out with the help of his hand. Reaching for one of the towels you’d gathered, you spread it out in front of your body, holding it out by the edges for the man to step into. 

“C’mon, Kookie.” You gestured with a nod of your head, your soft tone making a smile light up his face as he finally stepped out of the tub. Immediately enveloping him in the soft towel, you wrapped him in the dry fabric, hugging him as tired chuckles escaped his lips. 

“Go get dressed. I’ll be there in a minute.” You patted his butt, eliciting more giggles out of the man before he spun on his heel to leave the bathroom.

You could tell the shower had done a lot for his muscle tightness and overall attitude, the familiar smile you’d fallen in love with so long ago making a reappearance within moments of the water making contact with his skin.

Grabbing the other towel, you wrapped it around your own torso, squeezing the ends of your hair a bit, lifting and setting your feet down against the carpet to dry them before stepping out onto the tile floor. 

Shuffling into your bedroom, you whistled at the sight in front of you, a very bare Jungkook turning around to face you with the towel you’d wrapped around him bunched at his feet. 

“Hello there.” You flirted, your boyfriend scoffing as he looked down to his spread boxers, ready for him to step into. The smile remained on his face as he pulled the underwear up his legs, settling them on his hips before directing his gaze back to you.

“Hi, gorgeous.” He crooned, walking over to you with a smirk as he dropped a kiss to your temple. 

“Stop that.” You hushed, shoving his shoulder in an attempt to get him off of you from where he was latched onto your side, head down in the nook between your neck and shoulder pressing kisses to the still-wet skin.

“Oh, so you can flirt with me but I can’t flirt with you?” He raised his eyebrows, you nodding with a confirming hum as you successfully wriggled out of his hold. 

“Precisely.” You replied, slipping a large t-shirt over your torso and opening your drawer in search of proper underwear. 

“Mm. That sounds fair.” He hummed, feet padding against the floor as he exited the room, bent at the waist to ruffle the towel through his hair as he walked. 

After getting some of your regular sleep clothes on, you followed the route your boyfriend had taken moments before, squeezing the water out of your hair with the towel much like he’d done previously. 

“I love when your hair curls like that.” 

Jungkook’s eyes widened at the suddenness of your voice in the room, meeting your fond gaze through the mirror as you watched him wet a cloth underneath the running faucet. 

His dark hair was hanging in waves around his face, tendrils already half dry as they framed his cheeks. His doe eyes stared at you through the mirror, completely bypassing your comment as he turned to you, wet cloth still in hand. 

“You look really pretty.” He grinned, your head tipping in confusion as you gestured to your old ratty t-shirt; it was your classic bedtime attire and frankly, one of the ugliest outfits in existence. 

“How can you even say that right now?” You chuckled, the man mirroring your actions as his teeth beamed at you, eyes watching as you stepped forward and took the cloth from his hand, directing it back under the stream of water from the faucet. 

“I can say that all the time. You always look pretty.” He shrugged, smiling at your exhaled scoff as you waved him off. 

After squeezing the excess water from the washcloth with your hands, you twirled a strand of his hair around your finger, forming a firmer curl around your appendage and nodding once to affirm your work. 

“You’re prettiest.” You concluded with a smile, backing him up so that the backs of his tired knees hit the toilet, easily giving out and letting him land on the closed seat with a grunt. 

“You’re strongest, that’s for damn sure.” He huffed teasingly, watching you roll your eyes at him as you leaned over to grab his face wash. As you repositioned yourself in front of him to apply the foam onto his skin, his eyes poured into yours, making you hum in question at the glint in his eye. 

“C’mere.” He said simply, arms tightening around your thighs to pull you down onto his lap, your legs reflexively wrapping around his waist as he smiled in approval.

“Much better.” He squeezed your hips lovingly, wiggling his eyebrows at you to make it harder for you to focus on your application of the foam as you finally locked eyes with him. 

“Jungkook, I’m trying to take care of you.” You whined, making him stop immediately as he pursed his lips out, humming when you reflexively pressed yours to them. 

“What?” You asked, genuinely confused at the softened look in his eye. For god’s sake, you were in your ratty old college t-shirt sitting on a toilet applying sticky foam to fight his acne. What was romantic about this?

“Just love you.” He said simply, leaning forward to peck your lips again and giggling when some of the foam from his nose smeared onto your skin. 

“Love you too, you freak.”

[swynlake-spill]

Boba, please bully some of our shyer residents into posting selfies! I am dying for some Rarer Insta Content.

ok i’ll try here we go 

@vixey-chakraborty KEEP THE COW CONTENT COMING BUT ALSO LET UR OWN NATURAL RADIANCE SHINE!!! I LOVE U PLEASE IM ASKING SO NICELY BUT ALSO VERY LOUDLY SO EVERYONE CAN HEAR 

@rikuxnakayama sir  i cannot keep buying overpriced coffee from [name redacted] just for the ten seconds of eye contact we have i simply do not make enough money have pity on me and POST 

@vitani-blackwell u arent really shy so i dont understand how you are not posting daily thirst traps i have seen your body and therefore seen god please RESUME REGULAR CONTENT 

@melody-the-unwritten typing ur username just now made me cry. :( melody i MISS YOu. melody i dont think u understand u could be miss swynlake if u wanted... this is your YEAR

@princess-ting-ting you post extremely quality pics of your fish and family jigsaw puzzles and stuff and thats valid and good plz dont stop but also you are the qin i respect in this world and i think you deserve to be told how beautiful u are js 

@littlelectriceelduh ur mysterious and look like the boy my mum warned me about. plz indulge my worst desires and help me star in my very own all time low pop punk fantasy 

@arista-the-musical BLASPHEMY that i am tagging a triton wtf did your sisters teach u!! arista when i say that i believe if you post selfies tagged #stopglobalwarming that it could maybe inspire a movement im not even being hyperbolic i think the power is in your hands and you should use it 

@cinderellaashbourne HONEY PLEASE COME HOME tiana as her roommate why are you not instilling in ella the confidence needed to become a powerhouse insta mom im just saying she could build an empire off her smile 

@babettexdurand seeing u makes me go  🥺 🥺 🥺 🥺 🥺 🥺 sincerely do not think there are words... 

@evil--endeavors you want to be taken seriously as a business woman, totally fair! however, fourth wave feminism said stuff about idk owning ur sexuality or-- nvm dont do it for me do it for the young LESBIANS. also kick me in the face :) 

@one-lucky-lad small confession...i have a crush on this darling I KNOW I KNOW HOW EMBARRASSING however i am not immune to the specific charms of his beautiful blue eyes. im just saying haha what if we kissed 

@tink-bell tink used to post all the time but then she got her heart broken or something and i just think she needs to build up all that very valid fierce tink bell confidence she was famous for!! tink PLEASE give me the bed selfie i know you have! txt me u up ;) ? ask me to netflix and chill! also post on instagram obviously! 

@sanmononoke what is going on with this person real talk besides ofc being very hot as per swynlake’s hotness requirement. idk if she has an instagram. bet she’d post like feet pics and shit like that. think that we need a little bit of that spice in swynlake dont you!!! 

@moon-yeongjun frankly it is a crime that we are all collectively robbed of the journey that would be jun moon instagram experience. if you dont think he’s hot you’re lying to yourself!! new rule every time jun posts a petition he owes us a selfie its only fair idk im once again putting tiana to the task of making that happen

@notmuchofatail he’s been posting more lately but it is not enough for me. gregory eeyore is my past present and future. like im in love with him is what im saying. 

@a-merman-not-a-guppy stop pretending like you’re not a handsome lad its EMBARRASSING. what is the point also of designing ur own clothes if you arent putting up your wares on instagram. again this is just common sense i cannot believe im giving this immaculate advice for free. 

@notbad-justsungthatway again she posts decently but i think she should post more bc she is easily in the ten hottest people ever in swynlake. its a fact not an opinion and we’d all feel a lot calmer if she was active daily on instagram

@pinkpearlpark the coolest of the teens!! i need her to post so she can teach ME how to post. like idk what im doing teach me the ways of being an attractive rich cool person miss park! 

@bucktoothed--ice-prince again idk whats going on here he’s this very mysterious stranger who blew into town out of nowhere. maybe going without an instagram is the whole point but i would rather write dumb things on ur posts tbh

@trickster-knownas-pan AND A THIRD person who i know nothing about. maybe i am just nosy but also you are hot so you owe me something thats how survival of the fittest works maybe !!!!!!! i failed science three times!!!! 

@devyn-morey lol i know he posts a lot but obviously! obviously! 

@geehosaphat on the other hand martin has two posts on his instagram maybe and thats abysmal. martin you do realize you’re like. hot right. i mean it like you could be in a magazine. you’re hot. take off your shirt sometime maybe if you’re comfortable so you can flaunt it! 

@winndeavor again i know ur a serious business person who has a certain brand to maintain. on the other hand: you have abs. much to think about i know. 

@hclyghcst DISGUSTING that you could win jewel of the season or w/e and then disappear from my life. you owe me like ten selfies at this point! you’re cute kind and a good friend to people in your life! fuck im obsessed with u!! 

@vvinter-queen and now we shout out to her sister ANNA to help her. anna how is it that u have a moderately thriving bookstagram and yet elsa has no idea what a filter is. intervene. fix it. she’s beautiful. imagine how much ice cream u will sell. 

@gleamdncglow u dont have to post bc it might actually piss me off considering how pretty you are. but if you want to i guess (please please please please please please) 

@gabriella-marino you know what’s the best way to get to know ppl in town and make friends! yeah ur right, its thirst traps on instagram! i think you’re so cute on a serious note please tell me more about u...maybe in the captions on your thirst trap for instagram! 

@edwardandalasia honestly just curious how it would go if someone showed edward who is maybe suffering from some textbook case of amnesia how instagram works. you also have the best skin ive ever seen. send me ur tips. ok thank u!!!

[writing-the-end]

LoL Chapter 23- the Labyrinth

Masterpost

A Wizard Hermits tale (AU and Red belongs to @theguardiansofredland )

So close to the end, so close to winning the entire championship. Only one more challenge, one more maze- and one more corrupted beast to prove themselves as the best in the entire kingdom. 

________________________________________________

“Are you sure Magistrate Dolios is the dark wizard?” Keralis questions, tilting his head. “I mean, what he did was pretty mean, but...to practice dark magic?” 

“It’s him.” Zedaph hisses, his fingers curling in the fabric set on his lap. “He had a crystal in the antichamber, he had a horrible collection of parts used for spells.” Zed clenches his fists and jaw, struggling not to burst out. Tango and Impulse try to ease their friend’s worries. “He… I read through his log. He killed our guild. We were just the first, the opening act. He used our friends, our family, to start his path of destruction.” 

“But why? Why would he need dark magic? He’s the godsdamned Magistrate of Lairyon!” False looks around, leaning forward in the tavern they’re huddled in. It’s not the inn, but one closer to the stadium. They have a labyrinth to defeat soon. 

“Absolute power corrupts absolutely.” Doc growls, tapping his fingers together into a triangle shape. “Regular magic just wasn’t enough. Regular power just wasn’t enough.” 

“So he’s using the crystals to gather energy. Like what we saw in Gildara, with the grey landscape. And when the crystals sap energy for him to steal, it leaves those husk monsters behind.” Cub is slowly piecing together the puzzle, coming to understand everything he saw with the others in the heist. 

“And he’s using the Chimaera’s championship to sap more energy. That’s why we feel so tired when we finish an event. He’s stealing our power, my dudes.” Ren shivers at the thought. His energy being drained, taken by some creepy crystal and fueling Dolios’s insatiable thirst. 

“And we’re going back in soon.” TFC hums. “We have the labyrinth challenge.” 

“We don’t have to go in- we got what we needed. We can leave, make a plan with this knowledge we have. Tell the king, tell the people. They’ll take care of it.” Etho leans back in a chair, tipping till it nearly dumps him backwards. 

“But we’ve come so far!” Grian whines. “We could win the whole games, prove to Dolios that he never should have messed with us! Wouldn’t you love to see that smug smile of his wiped off when we win?” 

Agreements rise around Grian, and even Etho can’t help but want to prove that bastard wrong. Xisuma steps in. “At least we know why we’re getting so exhausted. We’ll know to rest, calm down while we’re in the labyrinth. And...we can warn Team Crafted.” 

“And then we’ll tell the king, tell the people. They’ll have to listen to us, we’ll be the champions!” Iskall grins. They’ve got this labyrinth challenge in the bag. 

The group rises, walking out of the tavern and back to the stadium. All around them, Milliara is buzzing with excitement. The final challenge of the Chimaera’s championship, the end of the games, has come. A river of people flow along the raised streets, flowing like the canals beside them. Rushing towards the stadium. They pass by other guilds, who sneer and turn away. Angry they lost, especially to a team. Do any of them know that the Magistrate practices dark magic? That he’s killed entire guilds in his search for power? For what? Surely he doesn’t keep all of it. 

It’s no matter to the hermits. They found the truth, and once they pass on this knowledge, it’ll be out of their hands. Entering into the bowels of the stadium, the locker room they sit in is empty. Once full of dozens more teams, now only two teams remain.

The entire guild sneers at the sound of Dolios’s voice welcoming the crowd. It’s muffled by the thick stone walls, but they can hear him tell of the harrowing journey ahead. And the grand prize that awaits for the team that defeats the labyrinth. All they need to do is pour a single bowl of water over the statue at the center of the labyrinth. 

But between that and both teams were beasts, traps, and spells designed to slow them down. Perhaps even kill them, if they aren’t prepared. Across the way, Grian can see nerves crease across Quentin and Jerome’s faces. He can hear Mumbo muttering next to him. Anyone can walk into the labyrinth, but only the best teams can walk out. Grian isn’t going to let anyone die- not on his oath as a healer. Not from the hermits, and not from Team Crafted either. 

Grian stands, walking across the locker room and coming face to face with Sky. The leader looks up, an easy and golden grin meeting Grian. “Hey, you here to wish us luck?” 

“Not exactly.” Grian wrings his hands, looking over his shoulder, before dropping his voice. “Listen, Sky, we hermits discovered something… the reason we’re always exhausted?” Sky leans forward, his eyes looking out over the rim of his sunglasses. “The magistrate is doing something dark, and he’s taking our power for his own. If you see a crystal that’s pitch black, or a creature with soulless white eyes and ash grey bodies- run. It’s dark magic.” 

Sky’s eyes widen, and behind him Grian sees Jerome and Mitch coil and look out at where Dolios’s voice can be heard. But Jason looks less convinced. “Why should we trust you? You’re trying to get us to fail, huh?” 

Grian’s sighs, collapsing his head into his hands. “No, we’re trying to help you. Us illegal guilds have to stick together.” 

Team Crafted’s faces all exhibit a mix of shock, surprise, and hints of defiance at Grian’s suggestion. But he’s smarter than he lets on. Jerome is the first to speak up. “Thank you for the warning, I knew that man wasn’t to be trusted. Good luck, hermits.” 

With that, the stadium erupts in a roar. Team Crafted stands, and disappears into the field, disappears from view. A few moments later, the hermits are called into the spotlight. Just like the opening ceremony, TFC leads them out onto the pitch. 

Or, what was the pitch. Massive hedges of writhing vines and ivy twist around the guild, engulfing them into a thicket that fills the once open arena. A dark, misty haze swirls, thickening where the hermits know the crowd is watching. Despite no eyes, no bodies visible, they can feel being observed. And yet the entire field is eerily quiet. They feel alone, no voices or light, only the sensation of sight. 

In the distance, a grumbling roar pierces the mist. Captured by the damp air, it hangs and echoes around the hermits. Iskall hides behind Stress while False, Wels, and Etho draw their blades. But TFC is the one to break the silence. “No use standing here. Team Crafted already has a headstart, and I’m not letting them get any further. Cleo and Jevin, take point. If anything looks suspicious, or even if it doesn’t, Cleo can search for a soul. Jevin, can you whip up slime warriors to be our...ahem, bait?”

“You got it boss.” Jevin draws his circle, blue light dappling the misty grey and green. Blue bodies of slime morph to shape, awkward steps pushing the hermits forward. Deep into the maze. The mist engulfs the comforting stone wall of the stadium, and they were only among hedge and haze. 

They push past traps set off by the slime warriors, around chimaeras and banshees soothed by Zedaph and Cleo, and over illusionary spells meant to turn them back. At each intersection, Scar marks off the way they came by plowing a giant X in the ground. When they reach a dead end and turn around, he blocks it off completely. 

“I don’t remember the field being this big.” Impulse groans, feeling his body ache at the feeling he now knows to be the work of dark magic. They haven’t seen a crystal or a husk, which only makes the feeling worse. It’s coming from everywhere. 

“They must’ve used expansion magic to make this place bigger.” Xisuma hums, kicking his boot at the feeling of something on his head. And again. He turns around, glaring at BDubs. “Would you quit trying to flat-tire me? It doesn’t work on boot, ya know.” 

BDubs’s face causes X’s head to spin and his heart to drop. His eyes are wide, confused as to why X is yelling at him. “Tha-that wasn’t me, X. That was-” 

One moment, BDubs is clear in Xisuma’s vision through his mask. The next, he’s disappeared. However, it’s not hard to find him with all the screaming. Writhing on the ground, mist and vines wrapping struggling in a fight with the plant mage. No matter how many times he casts his magic, it doesn’t shake off the ivy that crawls and drags him towards the hedges. 

“Help! Help it’s got me!” BDubs screams, digging his fingers into the ground and rooting himself there He groans, the vines still pulling on him despite being an immovable object. “It’s gonna rip me in half!” 

False swings her sword, the sharp steel biting into the vines and severing it from the briars snaked around BDubs. From the split branches, a red ochre spills out. Blood. The entire hedge rumbles to life, two eyes appearing in the mist. A branch breaks through the fog, colliding with a shield held aloft by Wels. The limb of the plant monster crushes the steel, tossing the shield aside and depositing the paladin onto his rear. 

Glowing white eyes draw closer, and the twisted grey vines of the plant monster’s face appears in the dark mist. Vines grab for any limb the hermits aren’t watching, engulfing arms, pulling on tails, wrapping around heads. Xisuma traps a few of the thousand limbs in a blackhole, rolling away from the beast. Grian takes to the sky, dodging around the shoots that threaten to skewer him. He whips a blast of air, clearing the fog to get a better view below.

It’s not the whole labyrinth, but the beast has spread it’s vines in an intricate system among it. All which are slithering over the ivy, like snakes in search of the hermits. What he also sees in the sky, beneath the plant monster’s perch and dug into the ground beneath the pitch, was the one thing he’s learned to despise. 

A dark crystal. It’s controlling the plant monster, black smog wrapping around the roots of the beast like chains. It’s practically bursting with energy, all the power and strength taken by the crystal during the entire course of the games. Even flying this high, he can feel the effects of his magic being siphoned from his body. “There’s one of those-” 

Swatted from the sky like a bug, Grian crashes into the ground with a sickening thud. Scar and Mumbo race to help him up. Mumbo nearly throws up, hearing the sound of bones cracking under Grian’s feathers and skin. But nothing can keep the sky angel quiet. “The plant thing...it’s protecting the crystal, or powered by the crystal, I dunno.”

“Where is it?” TFC questions, eyes flicking across the battling guild. Stress freezes the blood and vines solid, while Cub severs the limbs with portal after portal opening and closing. 

Grian grabs his head, trying to steady the spinning sensation. The moving hedges of the false maze, the limbs of the beast, don’t help to ease his confusion. He points a shaking finger at about 2 o’clock, relieved to have support from Mumbo and Iskall back to his feet. 

“Should we run away from it? Obviously it’s going to try and take our energy- shouldn’t we stay as far away as possible?” Joe raises an eyebrow. His quill rushes across the pages beneath the tip, a rushed spell spouting forth. A million beetles emerge from the aged paper, tiny pincers digging into the plant monster and ripping it apart. Keralis plucks one from the sky, swallowing the beetle whole and feeling reinvigorated by the bug.

“If Dolios placed that there, he obviously intended for us to get close to it. If he knew we’d be going that way, that means the statue must be this direction.” Xisuma proposes, sending a ball of void into the chest of the many limbed vine creature. 

“We should...we should destroy the crystal.” Grian hisses, grasping at his ribs and gasping for air. “So he can’t steal any more magic from here.” 

“How?” Doc growls, despite plowing ahead. Towards the monster. Towards the crystal. “We could hardly put a dent in it last time!”

“We’ll figure it out. We’re pretty clever.” TFC hums, hopping over a whipping vine. He grasps a thin rod of corundum, steeling himself when another attempts to toss him into oblivion. The hermits battle their way through the shifting maze, but with each vine they cut down, more seem to spring from the bloody limbs and misty air. The attacks only grow more aggressive as they near the body of the beast, near the dark crystal controlling it. The air grows thick, hard to breathe and pressing down on the team. In the distance, they can hear the roar of a chimaera. Team Crafted. Hopefully they’re safe, as far away from this beast as possible. 

The crystal comes into view. Ashen roots are planted firm around the massive crystalline structure, the gem pulsing with energy. Energy it’s stealing from the hermits and Team Crafted. Right on cue, black mist swirls around the opaque crystal, natural defenses going up. The hermits leap aside, avoiding the crushing blow from a twisted cable of vines by a narrow margin of time and air. From across the writhing greenery, TFC’s voice booms out commands. “You guys on the other side distract the monster- or better yet, try to kill it! Us over here will do our best to break the crystal.” 

A cacophony of acknowledgements lets the guildmaster know they heard him, and he wastes no time scrabbling to his feet. He ignores the sound of fighting behind him, the cracks and groans of the beast or the screams of his guildmembers. He needs to focus on this crystal first and foremost. 

TFC is a mineral mage. He knows gemstones- but not corrupted gems. His stomach clenches as his fingers brush against the smooth surface, and his head aches at the mere thought of how it controlled him before. He still feels horrible, snapping at his friends. It’s too dangerous to use, even in regular magic. This twisted, barbaric magical conduit needs to be destroyed. 

But if there’s one thing he knows, all gems can only take so much energy before they cleave. And this crystal is practically brimming with stolen magic. “Let’s feed the beast then.” 

“Have a snack, you mega crystal of doom!” Iskall shouts, bolts of radioactive energy crackling from his magic circle to the crystal. He doesn’t stop, doesn’t slow his attack until he can hardly stand. The gemstone remains standing, half buried in the dirt. But then False steps up, the multitude of cinquedeas summoned around her imbued with magic by Wels. A flick of the wrist, and the blades dig into the crystal. Rusted, but protruding from the gem like spines from a dragon. 

“Yes! Focus the strikes on False’s swords! Use them like conduits!” TFC grins, leaping free as a rooted foot rips from the ground beside him. For a brief moment, he turns his attention back to the fighting hermits. He clasps his hands over his ears, the telltale shriek of Cleo’s banshee scream almost rupturing his eardrums. Impulse is on his back, protected by a weak bolt of lightning shot from Mumbo’s stuttering magic. But otherwise, they’re holding their own just fine. 

“We’ve almost got it!” Wels cheers, noticing the cracks forming along the gem’s surface. Black smoke pours from the fractures, grasping at their feet and attempting to steal their magic. Attempting to keep control of the plant monster that protects it. 

The ground beneath their feet rolls and rumbles, the dirt and hedges shivering and bucking against the hermits’ feet. Wels turns around, grinning when he sees what- or who- is the cause of the earthquake. Like a geyser of stone, a spike of rock pierces through the heart of the dark crystal. The mist around the hermits’ dissipates like morning fog chased off by the sun. Above the team, the plant monster erupts into ash, raining flakes of the husked creature with one final creak of wood and vine. 

And the dark crystal shatters. It blows the hermits back, sending them tumbling among the shards of gemstone. The black aura fades with the color- it’s just a regular quartz crystal, albeit destroyed into a million tiny conchoidal pieces. The depressing weight on their bodies, that left them struggling to breathe and their magic weak, falls away like shed skin of a snake. None of them have felt this invigorated since the start of the games. 

“Guys, there’s the statue!” Grian prods Mumbo in the back, both wincing as pain ricochets through both wounded hermits. A lush garden at the center of the labyrinth, gardenia and lilac flowers growing around a tall statue rising from a fresh, crystal clear spring. Carved in stone from the Lionheart mountains, the statue features each and every god in the main pantheon of Lairyon. From Echol to Limal, and Artyne- god of water.

Water, the symbol of life and magic in Lairyon. Water flows fresh, clean, and pure from the spring surrounding the stone gods. Two bowls rest untouched at the spring’s edge, carved from the very cyprus trees that inspired Milliara to be founded. Ren steps up, pausing and looking back at his teammates. Bruised, battered, broken. But urging him not to waste another second. This is it. 

Ren dips the bowl in the spring. He swears he can feel energy, deep ancient magic within the cool water, chasing away the aftereffects of the crystal. In the distance, he can hear shouts of encouragement from vaguely familiar voices. Team Crafted is almost here. He doesn’t waste a second, wading across the water and pouring the bowl over the stone statue. 

The mist disappears, and the statues move, as if brought to life by the mystical spring. Merkal, the god of mischief, moves his cloak to the side. Deliss brushes away the lilacs and gardenia. And the stone rendition of Artyne smiles, revealing the chalice. Crowning the hermits as victors of the Chimaera’s Championship.

[darlingdreames]

1 - Unpopular opinion but Antoni hasn’t been with Kevin long enough for the way some of you talk about them. Maybe don’t jump the gun just yet. And not to pull focus but Trace was successful without Antoni too. Owns his own business. He didn’t need the fame either and yet was constantly accused when he never posted photos with the celebs he hung out with. All these things you guys are saying about Kevin you either said about Trace or accused him of the opposite and it just seems a little weird.

2 - Trace looked at Antoni like he hung the moon too and they had cute moments cuddling at home on the couch at the end of a long day. There really is no difference except that Kevin smiles in photos and doesn’t thirst trap on instagram but considering that Antoni thirst traps too, I don’t see why anyone should have such an issue with that. I don’t care about Trace beyond his association with Antoni but the difference in how people have treated him vs Kevin has bugged me for a while.     

3 - I think you were the only one who even liked Trace because you like to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. You were saying the same stuff you’re saying about Kevin now about Trace when they were dating. You even created a couple tag for them too. The fact that you can’t stand him now after how much you liked him and them as a couple before should at least make you more wary about Kevin or anyone Antoni dates. But you’re always all in so quick and it’s fascinating to me.   

~ 

I’ll admit that I did like Trace while he was dating Antoni.I was always defending him when people questioned his integrity and motives.And I did point out that Trace and Ant had their cute moments, although thosemoments were few and far between when it came to public consumption. You reallyhad to dig deep to find smiley Ant and Trace pics. Doesn’t mean more of thosemoments didn’t exist in private. On the contrary, I’m sure they did. Did theycare for each other? Yes, I believe they did. Did they love each other? I don’tknow, but I assume things were serious since Trace packed up all of his stuff fromLA intent on moving permanently to NYC, assuming he was moving in with Antoni.And then something happened. Something really bad. There is no denying it. Evenwithout in-depth knowledge of what went down, we know Trace fucked up. He fuckedup so badly that Ant shut him out completely. Trace was in limbo because all ofhis belongings were packed up to move and suddenly, he had no place to move to.Ant cut him off. He erased Trace from his IG, he stopped following him,multiple of Ant’s friends stopped following Trace one by one. That doesn’t soundlike a relationship that just “ran its course.” It doesn’t sound like anamicable split at all. One minute everything is fine, and the next minute yourpartner doesn’t even want you to exist in any part of their world anymore. That’swhen I realized that Trace wasn’t the person I thought he was. I wasn’t privy tohis past relationships or his current dealings with drugs. But that’s allspeculation (depending on who you talk to) so I’m not even gonna go into all ofthat. All I know is somehow, someway Trace hurt Antoni. And, with me, that’slike flipping a switch. You hurt someone that I care about and you are DONE. (Irealize I don’t know Antoni personally, but I know enough about him to careabout him, so don’t come for me, lol.) Once the rose-colored glasses were off,I started to see things about Trace that other people were seeing. Again, I won’tgo into detail because that’s beside the point. But dig a little deeper intoTrace’s past and you’ll see what I’m referring to. And I don’t think that allof it is just in the past.

Which brings me to Kevin. I was wary of Kevin at first because of what happened with Trace, and then I realized comparing Kevin toTrace isn’t fair to Kevin. So, me being me, I’m giving Kevin the benefit of thedoubt. I know Kevin isn’t perfect. His excessive drinking and general talk ofdrinking/alcohol worries me a bit. Not that there is anything wrong with it – Kevin isof age and he can do what he wants – but the fact that he’s now dating someonewho has had issues with alcohol in the past to the point that they don’t drinkanymore PERIOD gives me a little bit of anxiety over how this may impact theirrelationship in the long run. But Kevin has already taken steps to show that hecan and/or will compromise certain things for Ant. Participating in Dry Januaryis something he may be doing for Antoni’s sake, or he could be doing it forhimself. But the fact remains that he IS NOT drinking at all for the entiremonth of January. This from someone who constantly enjoys parties and alcoholon a regular basis. Is it a permanent fix? Of course not. Does it show that he’swilling to try to do things with his boyfriend’s best interests in mind? Yes. Buthonestly, here’s the deal: If Kevin fucks up like Trace did, I’m done with him,too. I want Antoni to be happy, and right now Kevin is making him happy. So Iam going to support them any way I can until I see that Antoni isn’t happyanymore. But until that time, just like I did with Trace, I will support Antand Kevin’s relationship and be a Kevintoni cheerleader until I have reason notto be.

Bottom line: I am a fan of Antoni. If you makeAntoni happy, we’re cool. If not? All bets are off.

[serenagaywaterford]

@volatilelovers​ replied to your photoset “ok so like i had a totally other purpose cos it was about me walkin...”

Ok 1) bra deets 2) I want ur dog I'm sorry I just I want to steal him 3) is this like no make up challenge? Hashtag real lesbian bodies? The airbrushing drives me nuts and soooo much so called lesbian content on tumblr is not realistic and therefore kinda lame imo but it's better than nothing. An embodiment person I follow started a series where ppl send in photos of different parts of their own body and idk this remind me of that. That and thirst trap obviously lmao

1) Puma! from Winners lol. It is SO comfy, ngl. The cups are those annoying bikini type removable ones and they can shift a bit but it’s nice and tight, but not too tight. I mean, Puma don’t make the most long-lasting, durable undies but they’re nice while they last. 

https://www.amazon.com/PUMA-Womens-Seamless-Graphic-Crossback/dp/B07XYGGLWM

Puma fits small tho. Like this was a medium, and it’s a bit small. And I’m just a regular 34-B/C (depending on the damn company ofc). 

I actually bought it cos of what we were talking about the other day and I was like “i need more sportsbras. sore boobies need gentleness, no more underwires.” (and i gotta say it has helped a lot it seems.) i honestly haven’t really worn sportsbras regularly since...like high school...... so this is all new haha. altho i’m now in the state where if i don’t have to wear a bra at all i won’t. (very different to even 5 years ago when i’d never NOT wear one, even to bed.)

2) he is stupid you can have him lol he has bad breath and won’t stop snuggling and licking toes. he’s a toe licker. he won’t give kisses anywhere else but if you have bare feet watch out. it’s disgusting lol

3) honestly i think that should be a hashtag. i mean so much of the “lesbian content” i post photowise is these perfectly shaped, photoshopped, etc women. probably most of whom aren’t even gay half the time. (the older ones i believe, and they tend to show more real bodies in older women. cos older women aren’t meant to fit in the ~tumblr aesthetic~ anyway.) but with the exception of one or two selfies, i don’t often see actual lesbian bodies here. lots of heavily filtered, posed, aesthetic photos of 18 year olds with perfect bodies. which is like... not most of us?  and to be totally frank, it took me so fucking long to be ok with my body and it wasn’t until i really accepted who i was (AND be around other women consistently naked and had it not matter to them) that i even was comfortable with it. like i’ve always been so, not ashamed, but shy. (and i know if you saw photos from when i was 19 and walking around in like no clothes you’d be like “are you sure? cos you look pretty confident in that teeny bikini or dress.” but inside i was very much not confident. i did it to fit in and be popular lol. sweet sweet (fake) validation, babey!). the self love that comes with being with other women is incredible.  anyway yeah so like i know how my body DOESN’T fit into the ideal aesthetic (and i’ve had plenty of comments in the past irl about my lack of “womanly”/”child bearing” hips, skinny arms, etc etc. the hip thing always kind of made me laugh tho cos i am always like “well, nature knows! good thing i never want kids then if i don’t have the hips for it!!”) but i think it’s important for people to see regular bodies around. like yeah? a little tummy? i used to be devastated by that (and doctors thought i had an ED cos of it) but i’ve come to accept that it ain’t going anywhere cos i’m a female and that’s just how it’s meant to be. esp as we get older. (and my wife insists it’s cute. cos i was skinnier when i met her and she’s like “you look so much better now”, which is similar to the time i lost a lot of weight to get rid of that tummy specifically cos it’s used to be a Big Thing I Hated, and once i put back on some weight my granny was like “oh thank god. you looked really sick before”.) and esp when you come from a culture that doesn’t have more body acceptance. like the first time i went to iceland and to the pool and all the women were just wandering around naked, in all ages and forms, and with zero shame, i wa slike WHAT IS THIS WORLD??? it was baffling to me. cos even in change rooms here it’s quite i dunno hush hush (altho not men’s locker rooms cos i’ve spent a lot of time in those when i was the only girl on the hockey team and they’re just boldly naked and don’t give a single fuck. but women’s lockerrooms? always a bit more...i dunno.). except old ladies who don’t give any shits whatsoever. but all ages there, just going about their business--and i STILL felt insecure which is crazy. i was stared at more for NOT being buttnaked. even the kids were like “wtf”. i want that sort of casual, easy body acceptance and lack of fear of judgement. and i didn’t even shave my pits here (it’s been weeks)... and i forgot until i posted the photos... and then i realised, it seems really obvious to me irl but then i look at the photos, and i’m like “shit, it’s not really noticeable is it? i’ve been freaking out all this time over nothing???” that was pretty stunning tbh. i didn’t realise til i took the photo that it’s not this massive deal. anyway i’m just sort of sick of the “young, thin, hyper-feminine so-called lesbian with long straight hair and sexy undies” ideal (esp when softly touching other young, thin, feminine so-called lesbians). my god just searching “lesbian” on this hellsite is 95% that exact content (that isn’t a comic or illustration which is the only way to see real bodies lol how ironic). god forbid there’s a butch in sight, even a soft butch, or normal body, or natural bush/hair, or tomboy that isn’t super feminine. (the only tomboys allowed are the cute ones with the hipster shirts and backwards ballcap with long hair and perfect eyeliner). we get the occasional professional athlete but that’s it. (where are the regular athletic women, the sporty, muscular women, not hyper-feminine tomboys? where are the stone butches and big old ‘i don’t give a shit bout anything’ dykes? the women who exist outside the ideal BMI and age range? nowhere. cos it doesn’t fit the virgin tumblr aesthetic. it’s not “pleasing” to the majority of users here cos they’re so accustomed to only seeing one type of “lesbian”) but beggars can’t be choosers. and so i reblog the slight bit of shit we do get lol. i dunno, if i was an 18 yr old lesbian i’d be so worried cos i don’t look anything like these girls and no one else i know is either. so just a regular ole boring lesbian body here and it’s imperfect by social standards but it’s fine by my own. tbh i think it’s pretty cool that normal people send in photos of their bodies, just regular, imperfect, everyday people to counteract the mass of bullshit on social media where everyone is so fucking fake. (i assume that’s what you mean by the blogger you mention. i’m guessing it’s not photos of perfect, filter-heavy body parts etc.) and i think in a weird way, being seen --not necessarily validated for it tho-- helps your own ability to appreciate yourself. like not hiding it. just taking that step and posting “this is my leg” esp if you’ve been insecure about it. and you don’t even need the “omg what a beautiful leg! leg power!” sort of social media cheap validation stuff. just the act of posting it. (and i mean...i don’t mean porny, thirst photos to get likes. just... you know normal shit. although i would TOTALLY post my bush if it was allowed just to knock it home that it’s natural. and NICE. and we need to see it more. and i don’t mean in a porn way either. but in the way we see women in art or science books. nonsexual. like that goop episode LMAOOOOO) just as a “this is what it is”. and we all need a little more bodylove i think. and it’s hard to do that when all you see is the insta and tumblr ideal aesthetics absolutely constantly. but i mean i really did just want to show off the bra ...which then turned into showing off the dog lolololol cos he’s ridiculous.

[kadobeclothing]

Wild celebrity hair transformations in isolation from Jade Thirlwall’s natural look to Olivia Attwood’s dramatic bob

CELEBS across the world are currently in isolation and just like us, they’re missing their favourite hairdressers to sort out their tresses. However, a few have taken matters into their own hands… With some wonderful and some, er, unexpected results. 18 Elle looks cute with her strawberry pink hairCredit: InstagramPEACH CRUSH Maleficent actress Elle Fanning revealed she had ditched her bright blonde hair for a beautiful peachy-pink shade. Sharing a bathroom selfie with her 4.2 million fans, the 22-year-old looked cute as a strawberry button with her new hue. 18 Jennifer Love Hewitt really likes her new pink hairCredit: InstagramLOVE PINKActress Jennifer Love Hewitt’s grin says it all as she shows off the results of her at-home dye job. Captioning the Instagram pic, Jenn wrote: “The smile of a girl who just did at home hot pink highlights because what else can I do right now!” The 41-year-old, who doesn’t usually stray far from her signature brunette tone, gave a bashful apology to her longtime colourist, Nikki Lee. “Don’t be mad, lol,” she wrote, tagging Lee in her caption. “I really miss you!” 18 Jade’s hair looks beautiful in its natural gloryCredit: InstagramCURLY GIRLYLittle Mix star Jade Thirwall might be a thirst trap but her glorious natural-texture hair certainty isn’t. Not a dry end in sight! Since being isolated away from her regular mane man Aaron Carlo, the 27-year-old has ditched the straighteners and embraced her stunning natural texture. 18 Cheer up, Chris! Your hair doesn’t look that badCredit: InstagramTOTAL RECALLHello, Chris? The 90s called, it wants its boyband curtain ’do back. Jokes aside, if anyone can pull off this grown-out style it’s Love Island’s Chris Hughes. Just look at those blonde highlights and natural waves. Swoon! 18 Olivia Attwood proves she can pull of long of shorter hairCredit: InstagramLONG AND SHORT OF ITWhile colour and cutting are two hairdressing staples, extensions also need a lot of professional maintenance to stay looking great. Now sporting a long bob, Love Island fave Liv Attwood seems to have ditched her usual mane of longer locks for her natural length. And it looks stunning. PRETTY IN PINKJLo sizzles in hot pink underwear as she flaunts toned body on photoshootBENDY BRITBritney shows off figure as she does yoga workout to help keep her ‘sane’’SO WORRYING’Catherine Tyldesley reveals both her parents have been battling coronavirusGO ON MY SONGeordie Shore’s Aaron Chalmers welcomes baby boy with girlfriend Talia OatwayLOOKING ALL WRIGHTMichelle Keegan hits supermarket in rubber gloves – and still looks glamMOVING ONBachelor star Hannah Ann Sluss is dating a mystery man while in quarantineTIME’S UPDoctor Who’s ex show boss Steven Moffat won’t return to write new episodesbrotherly banterWhen is Brews Brothers on Netflix? Release date, cast and plotsimp-ly brilliantThe Simpsons drops new special on Disney Plus focussing on MaggieCRIME SCENEWhere is Vera filmed? Locations in Northumberland and Newcastle revealed 18 Luckily Bruce was on hand to give his daughter a haircutCredit: Instagram18 Bruce and Demi’s daughter seemed pleased with her close cropCredit: InstagramCLOSE SHAVEWhat do you do when you’re in isolation and your mum starts rewatching her smash 90s hit, G.I. Jane? Well if you’re Tallulah Willis it means asking your dad to get the clippers out and give you a number one all over. The 26-year-old shocked her followers last week when she revealed her dad, Bruce Willis, had shaved all her hair off. Fans on social media were quick to point out the striking resemblance between Tallulah and her mother Demi Moore in G.I. Jane. 18 Whoops! Iain Stirling’s girlfriend Laura Whitmore should stick to the day jobCredit: InstagramSCISSOR HAPPYLove Island narrator Iain Stirling may think his girlfriend Laura Whitmore can do no wrong but one thing she probably won’t be doing again is hairdressing. Showing off her skills to Instagram, Iain captioned the tufty, wonky-haired image: “Just let Laura cut my hair.” One fan joked: “With what? A spoon?” Ouch! Perhaps stick to the day job, Laura. 18 Tina showed off her pink new ‘doCredit: InstagramUP OUR STREETCORRIE’S Corrie star Tina O’Brien showed off her shocking bubblegum pink ‘isolation hairdo’ to fans on Instagram and they are loving it! The mum-of-two unveiled her gorgeous new hue to her followers, while pretending to look out of the window and reminisce about the days of ice cream vans. 18 Sophie’s natural curls are stunningCredit: InstagramCURLY SOPHGeordie Shore babe Sophie Kasaei has always had long, straight hair extensions but now in isolation she’s gone natural and embraced her gorgeous curly locks. The beauty, 30, wrote: “So yep this is the real me guys. Hair extensions out, make up off eyelashes gone obv I still have my brows on and aesthetics in place… my parents would be proud of me embracing my natural curls. Raise a hand for the curly hair gang Also sad there’s no curly hair emoji.” 18 Luckily he’s handsome so no one will be looking at his hairCredit: InstagramNICE BUNSChristiano Ronaldo looks delighted with his new ’do, courtesy of girlfriend Georgina Rodriguez. The 35-year-old former Manchester United superstar flashed a big grin and thumbs up as his 26-year-old love clipped his hair. Apparently insisting on keeping his man bun, he told his 210 million fans: “Stay home and keep stylish.” Spanish-Argentinian model Georgina, posted the same clip captioned “haircut by Gio” and a laughing emoji. 18 Kylie has gone for a lighter, warm apricot colourCredit: InstagramGINGER NINJAKylie Jenner, who is currently isolating at home with her daughter Stormi, showed off her shorter new length and lightened hair colour. Known for constantly changing up her styles, the queen of Instagram showed off her new dark-peach hue by Cassondra Kaeding, a Los Angeles based hair colourist whose clients include Rosie-Huntington Whiteley, Kate Hudson and Ciara. 18 Would the real Joshua Ritchie please stand upCredit: InstagramBLONDE HAZECheeky Joshua Ritchie is all smiles as he shows off his new bleach blonde crop to his 973k Instagram followers. The Love Island star unveiled his blonde ambition and revealed it was part of a ‘dye your hair’ challenge, before nominating several of Island alumni. Tagging series four winner Jack Charles, he quickly responded to the dare: “Never

”. Leave it to the professionals, Joshua! 18 Sultry Gaz has embraced iso life with a hot new lookCredit: InstagramRAZOR SHARPOne star who couldn’t wait to get the clippers out is Geordie Shore’s Gaz Beadle, who wasted no time in shaving off his hair just a week into lockdown. Uploading the photo on 29th March, he captioned it: “It’s off

#lockdownhair

”And it seems the dad-of-two is rather taken to his new ’do, uploading another photo and announcing: “Getting used to this look…

shaved hair don’t care….

” 18 The leader of the Beckham clan can pull of any lookCredit: InstagramGLORY DAYSIt must be 2004 because football hunk David Beckham is back to his glorious, shaved head. King of the changing haircuts, the patriarch of fashion’s first family debuted his drastic new look on Instagram after tiring of longer locks during isolation. Showing off the results of his trim with a black-and-white pic of his shaved bonce, he proved once again that he can pull off almost any hairstyle. 18 Cody let his girlfriend Miley Cyrus shave his hair – it must be loveCredit: InstagramBUZZING TO SEE YOUThe new Mr Miley Cyrus, Cody Simpson, let his girlfriend get busy with the clippers and shave off his former floppy-haired ’do. The 23-year-old musician let his 27-year-old beau give him a buzz cut as part of 4Ocean’s ‘Clean Cuts For Clean Oceans’ challenge to help remove trash from the sea. Keen to spread the word, Cody nominated pop superstar Justin Bieber. Over to you, Beibs. 18 Olivia’s pretty face and bubblegum pink hair makes her look sweetCredit: InstagramBUBBLEGUM QUEENLove Island star Olivia Bowen is now a bubblegum pink bombshell, after telling her fans it was “only a matter of time” before “hair boredom” struck. The 26-year-old looked beautiful in her photo for the ’gram, showing off her toned figure and impressive array of body ink. Olivia is currently isolating with hubby Alex Bowen and their two dogs at their new Essex home. 18 All hail queen Ari!Credit: ArianaGrande/TwitterSEVEN RING-LETSPop songstress Ariana Grande has ditched the straighteners, extensions and high ponytail for an altogether different look during isolation and her 180 million Instagram fans approve. One wrote, “Your hair !! thriving”, while celeb pal Katy Perry gushed: “Keep this look after quarantimes pls”. Got a story? email digishowbiz@the-sun.co.uk or call us direct on 02077824220. We pay for videos too. Click here to upload yours.

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[undertale-imagine-that-the-2nd]

Anon Asked: UT UF Bros react to their SO being a vampire

Okay there's so many different styles of vampires. Classic 'Dracula' type, the hyper sexualized 'True Blood' type, the red drinkers (actual color red not just blood) from Adventure Time, the 'snowflake' type from Twilight, and many others. So to keep everything to a standard I'll stick with having this s/o as being a kind of vampire from the True Blood universe. Meaning they burn in sunlight, are harmed by silver, can die from a stake to the chest, and drink human blood. They also have super speed, super strength, need blood, and have retractable fangs. Pretty standard I guess. UT!Sans: -Shock.png -He thinks you're joking at first, but then he sees you're 100% serious. Now he's concerned for your mental health. But then he nervously jokes that he's gonna need some proof. So you try to give him some quick proof. You let your fangs out and he jumps almost off the couch. please don't do that again. -His eye lights go out and he gets kinda quiet for a few minutes after that as he tries to mentally process the bomb you just dropped on him. He has so many questions! How did you become a vampire? How long have you been a vampire? How old are you?? Do vampires really drink blood? What abut garlic and crosses!? Do vampires really need permission to enter someone's home?? -You answer everything you asks you. You tell him who your maker was/is, how long you've been a 'creature of the night~', how old you were, and how you did have to drink blood. He seemed unsettled by that. But took solace in knowing you didn't kill for the blood. -Also you talked about how garlic didn't hurt you but it did make your eyes water (from how strong it is to your heightened sense of smell), and that crosses (crucifix or just regular kinds) don't hurt you at all. But the stake thing...that was real. Sans looked a little ill knowing that a stake to the heart would make you explode into a pile of blood and gore. -And thankfully he's too curious to be mad at the moment, but late when his science side is sated he'll get a little pissy that you waited so long to tell him something so important. But his anger won't be too hot. He can kinda see why you were scared to let anyone (even him) find out. Vampire lore isn't exactly glittering with positive representation. -Honestly he's actually fine with it. You're still you. You just have a weird diet and some extra abilities. Just don't starting raising your LV and he'll be fine. UT!Pap: -He's excited! But then he admits that he doesn't really...know what vampires are? Papyrus hasn't watched too many vampire tv shows or movies. He's more interested in comedy and drama than any type of horror. Meaning he's not very familiar with the lore. So you have to explain to him what vampires are, and what they can do. What you can do. You explain your enhanced speed, your super strength, your thirst for blood, everything. You don't lie to him. That wouldn't do either of you any good, and plus it would make him sad to know you kept things from him. But... -He's excited again! But now because he understands. He really doesn't see a problem with you not technically being human. If he, as a monster, were fine with dating a human then he'd also be fine dating a vampire. He's not even mad you waited so long to tell him! He knows you were just nervous. And that's alright. He's just glad you finally felt comfortable enough to tell him. If anything this will make your relationship stronger! -That being said...he is a tad concerned about your diet. The idea that in theory you have to hurt someone just to feed makes him uncomfortable. So when he finds out you've never hurt anyone he's beyond relieved. You tell him that you pay some people and in return they give you a few pints of their blood every week. It's all a very business like and totally legal. (if this is true is up to you. you could just be saying it to ease his mind. ignorance is bliss after all~) -Once all that is out of the way HE IS SUPER EXCITED TO TRAIN WITH YOU! He wants to see just what you can do! Just how strong and fast are you?? You've got to come with him next time he trains with Undyne! She'll be thrilled to know that someone else will be able to handle her rigorous training regimen! You better tell him to keep the vampire bit to himself for now. Don't want too many folks in your business after all. UF!Sans: -Truthfully, he's not even mad. He knows some personal secrets take time to share and expecting your new datemate to spill everything about themselves during the first week together isn't just unrealistic, it's kind of entitled in a dickish way. Like who the fuck are you to demand to know every secret of another living being? Nobody gets to force this kinda shit. So yeah, Red isn't mad. If anything he thinks it's cool as fuck. And he's also secretly happy you trust him enough to let him in on the secret. <3 -But like holy shit you're so fast it LOOKS like you can teleport. And you can straight up throw a CAR almost the length of a football field! (don't ask how you were able to demonstrate these things for him.) He's pretty sure even Undyne isn't strong enough to pull that shit off. Also knowing you're badass enough to not need him hawking over you all day is a weight off his shoulders. He'll never tell but he was so worried that some bullheaded monster would see you as an easy LV boost and try to kill you. -Also, the blood drinking thing is metal as fuck, like you've become at least 79% cooler to this edge boy. He even wants to see you drink some time. This boy has a biting kink lol and maybe a blood kink from hell and he'd looooove to watch you bite someone and drink them like they were nothing more than a glass of wine. He's getting turned on just thinking about it. And he likes your fangs. You two match now. And all he can think of asking you is "if you're a vampire does that mean you can hold your breath forever?" but he thinks it might be too soon to dive into askin that. Maybe he'll bring it up on his birthday. -But he is worried about the whole 'vampire weaknesses' shit. He's not too bummed about not getting to go out during the day with you. He's kind of a night owl anyway, so at least if he can't sleep he'll have you to talk or chill with. Hell, he might even switch around his sleeping schedule to make more time at night with you. But he's not thrilled with how apparently silver burns you?? He'd be more concerned that you'd get burnt at his and Boss's house but thankfully Boss has always been a fan of gold and not silver. So yay for the little shit. He didn't like how you said vampires apparently pop like a damn gore filled balloon if stabbed in the chest???? He'd totally think that was cool if it wasn't you he was worried was gonna pop. He at least can be relieved that you're fast enough to dodge just about anything. Again, yay for the little shit. UF!Pap: -He swells with pride. Of course HIS mate is even better and cooler than he'd originally thought! So cool he's both proud and vaguely threatened. He's still the scariest though, make no mistake. Just because you drink blood and can move faster than a cobra doesn't mean you're suddenly the cooler than THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS! So don't get any funny ideas. -And as for your speed, agility, strength; he's both relieved and upset. On the one hand he's comforted by the fact that you're tough enough to look after yourself. He was worried he'd have to watch you at all hours of the day to prevent some fool from attacking you for easy LV. But on the other hand...he's bummed that he can't be your protector. He liked the idea of being the one to keep you safe and secure and out of harms way. He liked feeling needed. Just let him continue to pretend you need his protection, to keep him happy~ -But it seems that while his fear that you'd be easy to kill have fled, a whole new set of worries have cropped up in its place. Before he was scared that you'd be 'dusted' with ease since you were a human. But now he's worried you'll get stuck outside during sunrise! Or somehow you'll have silver forced on you just to cause you pain. Or worse yet you'll get attacked unaware and a stake will get driven through your heart! The Edge King is very worried but hides it well. And he's pleased he doesn't have to replace any key metals in the house. His love for gold and indifference to silver really was lucky. -As for your diet, it actually makes a lot of sense now that he looks back. You'd never seemed too thrilled to go out to eat for your dates together. You'd preferred to go take midnight trips to the abandoned beach, or concoct trap ideas together. Things that never involved consuming food. But now that he knows you're a vampire he supposes sitting and eating food wouldn't equal fun to you. And he has no problem with you drinking blood. He won't ask to watch you feed, and he refuses to let you bring any 'food' home with you. He knows how hard it is to get blood out of material and doesn't want stains anywhere. Also secretly he knows seeing you bury your face into someone else's neck in even a vaguely sensual way will make him so fucking jealous but shhhh it's a secret lmao -But if you pull any of that 'hungry creature of the night' stuff on him he will lock up. Like he will totally freeze and turn as red as a tomato he was not prepared to find you stalking towards him like YOU were the predator so fucking HOT WTF STOP. Why does he find this all so alluring he's getting too flustered! Also, pro tip: if you want to really make this edgy skellie weak in the knees then gently scrape your fangs against his bones. Any bones. Arm bones, neck bones, ribs! But heads up, he will go hard as fuck and raw you into the bed like a man possessed if you do it to his pelvic bone. ;o)

[olruggioofthetorch]

3, 12, 16, 17, 28, 32, 36, and 42 for Tinsel and 2, 6, 9, 13, 14, 20, 45, and 50 for Folsom!

Oh heck yeah

Tinsel:

3: What does their safe space look like?

I honestly don't know if they have a safe space? I wanted to say their apartment but it really isn't the happiest place for them. I guess wherever they're with friends, they're happy.

12: Are they an overall healthy person? Do they make for a good patient or a terror?

Tinsel has a small handful of health problems but they're otherwise pretty sturdy. They're a surprisingly good patient except they downplay their problems a little too much.

16: What do they look for in a friend? A love interest?

They're willing to befriend most people but Tinsel's friends seem to skew sweet, supportive and/or chaotic. They also have a lot of neurodivergent friends :3 So basically they're looking for people who can handle them. They also appreciate someone who can speak bluntly.

Tinsel has admitted they like smart, mysterious women lol but their partners seem to land in two catagories: big gorl or scary.

17: Who are they soft for? Do they find being soft easy or difficult?

Tinsel is ehhhhhhh not a big fan of being soft/vulnerable with anyone (they have a reputation to defend here) but Zona seems to be able to activate their soft side bc he says the right things very sincerely. Riot is definitely softening them up just because she's so sweet to them and they've been stupid for her from day one lmao. They're also very soft with/about Bast bc they have a lot of feelings associated with her.

This is not to say Tinsel has difficulty being soft. They are soft. Tinsel cries almost every arc. They've just had a tough couple of years.

28: If your character was in today's world, what social media platforms would they avoid? Or be prominent on?

I don't think they'd do Twitter or fb but Tinsel would be tiktok famous, 100%. They'd start off with a fairly sizable "Sword Lesbian" and general historical acting account but get verified really quick after posting adventuring tiktoks with Kira and Zona.

They also have an Instagram they post thirst traps on.

32: Your character is having a prom night/debs. What kind of outfit do they wear?

I feel like they'd look at prom dresses for like a good week or so and then be like "hold on, I'd fucking hate that" and find a nice silk blend suit that'd match their date's outfit.

36: Tell us something about your OC that doesn't make it onto the page?

Aw it's kinda sad but they thought they lost their chance at being loved when Bast disappeared bc they were convinced she was their soulmate. They definitely realized that wasn't true (about losing their chance to be loved) but they did think that before they met Riot.

42: Does your character celebrate their birthday? If not, why?

Yeah! They don't ever plan anything but their birthday is around the solstice so I imagine their friends have some of that time off. So they usually have someone to celebrate with that week. This year since they have money they want to buy themself a big bag of shrimp.

Folsom:

2: Tea, coffee, hot chocolate or other?

Can vampires drink coffee? I think he'd like coffee if he could drink it. He'd probably like anything warm, though. Do you think they make like, vampire soylent? I think he'd be into that too.

He lives mostly lives on cow blood tho.

6: What kind of books comfort them? What books help them heal after a hard day?

He loves scifi/space stories! He likes anything that has to do with space, though. I think he'd really dig The Martian. He also canonically writes Star Trek fanfiction so like, take that as you will.

9: What is your character's trigger point? What makes them angry, sad or makes them go off?

Folsom is super socially anxious but he expresses it with anger. That's his default reaction to most things that are scary or difficult, really. Dude picks fight over flight any day. He's got some triggers tied to childhood abuse so that really added on to it. He's learning to deal with it, though, now that he's got some support.

13: Describe your character's typical wardrobe for the regular day.

A cowboy hat (naturally), dirty work shirt, some kind of poncho thing, jeans, boots, leather gloves, sunglasses/goggles if he needs em. He needs a good deal of sun protection and he's never warm so he wears a lot of clothes.

14: Are they a simple person to please or difficult?

Difficult unless you're his husband lol. He's just happy to be around Benji. For most people, however, they probably won't please him on the first try.

20: Does your character have a comfort item?

I don't think he does. He probably could use one.

45: Star Sign?

He's a Taurus. I did not decide this until right now but let's say his birthday is April 28th.

50: How does your sleep at night? Are they a heavy or light sleeper? Do they dream or have nightmares? Do they find it easy to sleep or are they more a night owl?

He doesn't sleep most of the time. He stopped sleeping regularly sometime in his teenaged years due to the vampirism. Sometimes if he's injured or over exerted himself, he'll sleep to recover. Then he sleeps like a brick. He dreams but he doesn't usually remember them.

[meetpositivesblog]

9 Proven Benefits of Semen that will Blow your Mind

9 Proven Benefits of Semen that will Blow your Mind

Ah milk. The Dairy Council spends billions of dollars each year promoting the benefits of this cold, white drink. But have you ever wondered about the benefits of man milk? Yes, you read that correctly, man milk, aka semen. 

As crazy as it sounds, semen has a multitude of benefits stemming from the minerals and nutrients it contains, and those seminal benefits can be passed directly on to you. That’s right; we did the research and now we’re here to present you with the facts.

Perhaps you’ve recently swallowed some baby gravy, or you enjoy drinking that man milk routinely. Regardless, you’re looking to find out if this creamy substance will provide you with anything more than a slightly sour stomach and a faint acidic aftertaste. So let’s take a dive into this sticky subject, and see the benefits that it offers.

Vaginal/Anal Intake

The vaginal and rectal linings are very absorbent, so either one is a viable route for soaking up the nutrients in your man’s spunk sauce.

Antidepressant

Semen contains quite a few components that have been studied to show anti-depressant qualities. One of these is nerve growth factor. Its primary responsibility in semen is to help relax the female so that the sperm can achieve its reproductive objective. It’s also been shown to be a vital hormone missing in the brains of those who suffer from Major Depressive Disorder. This means that increasing nerve growth factor would only prove to make people happier. Additionally, nerve growth factor has been found to be an anti-inflammatory as well as an antioxidant.

Antianxiety

Semen contains mood-enhancing compounds like oxytocin, progesterone, estrone, serotonin, and melatonin. Oxytocin is also known as the “cuddle hormone” because, when released, it makes people feel more affectionate and connected. Progesterone has been shown to have anti-anxiety characteristics. Estrone piggybacks on serotonin to help enhance moods, and melatonin helps relaxation occur.

Mood Enhancement

A study backed by the SUNY institute found that female college students who received baby batter on a regular basis were happier and less suicidal than those who didn’t. Researchers chalked this up to the mood-enhancing benefits of semen, however, they didn’t take into account any other factors, like a happy home life, being successful in school, or, I don’t know, getting raw D on the reg. Sounds like a pretty good place to be in life, and it sounds a little irresponsible to claim that the happiness of these women was directly dependent upon getting 20 ccs of white gold injected into them without taking any other factors into account. But what do I know? I’m no scientist. I’m just a chick writing a blog post about the benefits of man mayo.

Ingestion

The amount of Google searches for “eating cum” is astounding: a little under 10,000 for the past month, to be exact. In fact, this may have been the route you were thinking of when you initially clicked on this blog post. Lucky for you, we’ve got what you were looking for. Swallowing semen is the quickest way to get all of the benefits of your man’s baby juice, and think, he might even enjoy it too.

Longevity

We know this might be hard to swallow, but yes, semen can make you live longer. Spermidine (originally isolated from sperm, hence the name), when ingested, has been proven to dramatically increase the lifespan of animals by as much as 25 percent. In the same study, it was also found to prevent liver disease as well as liver cancer.

Cognitive Functioning

Nerve growth factor does a lot for the body. In addition to being an antidepressant, an anti-inflammatory, and an antioxidant, it’s also known to help stop the brain from aging. Nerve growth factor, which is very abundant in semen, is vital for maintaining the brain’s neurons. Neurons process and transmit information; they’re what make your brain work. Survival of these neurons is essential for you to have a working brain! Who knew that giving brain could affect your brain in such a positive way?

Nutritional Benefits

Have you recently taken a vitamin deficiency test (maybe on HealthLabs.com), and found that you were lacking in a few vital nutrients? Well get a spoon and ask your man for a plate of some nut butter, because semen is chock full of zinc, potassium, magnesium, calcium, and citrate. The nutrients get absorbed in your body like a less expensive vitamin shot (see ya later, Jamba Juice).

Topical

This might come as a surprise to you, but semen not only benefits the inside of your body but the outside as well. That’s right, with the amounts of zinc, vitamin c, and spermidine in your dude’s jizz, you could open up your own skincare line (this statement has not been evaluated by the FDA).

Teeth

Looking for an alternative, all-natural teeth whitening solution? Forget the charcoal; check out your man’s chubby. Although it’s not the white paste you’re used to putting on your toothbrush, semen has loads of zinc in it, which is a natural teeth whitener. Zinc’s seminal job is to aid the sperm’s survival. But that doesn’t mean that it can’t also aid the survival of your pearly whites.

Hair

Have you heard of a keratin treatment? Basically, you pay someone hundreds of dollars to put protein in your hair to make it stronger. Well, did you know that there’s a source of protein that you probably haven’t considered? Semen has over 200 different kinds of protein in it which can give your hair the strength and shine that it so desperately needs.

Semen also contains spermidine, which, when used on human scalps, has been shown to promote shaft elongation (LOL) as well as prolonged hair growth. Even though semen may be the one thing that you’ve actively tried to keep out of your hair, go ahead and consider this DIY hair treatment the next time you want to give your hair some life (get it?).

Skin

Spermidine is back, baby! In addition to increasing longevity and aiding in healthy hair, spermidine is an antioxidant and is great for the skin. It’s believed to smooth skin, lessen wrinkles, and even diminish acne. In fact, companies sell spermidine-derived facial cream for upwards of $200! If you’re not looking to spend that money, a money shot would be a cheaper and more natural alternative.

Injaculation

Let’s say you’re a man reading this blog post, and your partner doesn’t have a penis, or your penis-wielding partner isn’t willing to give you a nice, cold glass of man milk, so the only readily available source of semen is your own. You should be able to get some seminal rewards too! Sure, go ahead and smear it on your face and in your hair, but does the thought of drinking your own kool-aid or shooting it up your butt disgust and terrify you in ways that you’ve never felt before? Not to fear! There’s a way for you to utilize your own love juice, and it involves loving yourself.

Injaculation, or “retrograde ejaculation” is the process of releasing your semen inside your own body. When nearing close to an ejaculation, instead of allowing the splooge and all of its benefits land on an ungrateful sock, you release it in retrograde, or back inside of your body. It may sound painful or unnatural, but it’s not. Taoists have practiced injaculating for thousands of years, as well as certain sects of Buddhism, Hinduism, and even ancient Egyptians! So go on, show yourself some love.

Things to Remember

Now you know the different ways you can use that baby batter to your benefit, but there are a few things you should keep in mind before diving face-first into a vat of high fructose porn syrup.

Secure and Confidential STD testing services

The fastest results possbile – available in 1 to 2 days

GET TESTED TODAY

You can be allergic to semen. Before you go smearing it on your skin or guzzling it down like the thirsty thirst trap you are, know that there is an allergy called Human Seminal Plasma Protein Hypersensitivity. It can lead to an allergic reaction including itching, wheezing, hives, chest tightness, and difficulty breathing.

Though semen contains tons and tons of benefits, remember that it doesn’t come in huge quantities (~ 1 tsp). You would need to use a lot of semen to see most of the results. So, if you’re only using that baby formula for the benefits, you might be disappointed. Instead, we implore you to enjoy the nut butter for what it is and see the benefits as an added incentive.

Finally, and this is really, truly, the most important part: Make sure your source of semen is STD-free! You will do a lot more harm than good if you pour infected liquid gold all over your body. Let your man know that you’re interested in benefiting from his groin gravy, but he needs to get tested first.

*Remember, you can get STDs from oral sex, anal sex, and getting sex fluids in your eyes!*

And if you’re interested in learning more about the specific components of semen, check out our post on What’s Semen Made of.

Medically Reviewed by J. Frank Martin JR., MD on October 2, 2018

from knowmystatus.life https://ift.tt/2pfpcZR via IFTTT

[hivknowledgeorg]

9 Proven Benefits of Semen that will Blow your Mind

9 Proven Benefits of Semen that will Blow your Mind

Ah milk. The Dairy Council spends billions of dollars each year promoting the benefits of this cold, white drink. But have you ever wondered about the benefits of man milk? Yes, you read that correctly, man milk, aka semen. 

As crazy as it sounds, semen has a multitude of benefits stemming from the minerals and nutrients it contains, and those seminal benefits can be passed directly on to you. That’s right; we did the research and now we’re here to present you with the facts.

Perhaps you’ve recently swallowed some baby gravy, or you enjoy drinking that man milk routinely. Regardless, you’re looking to find out if this creamy substance will provide you with anything more than a slightly sour stomach and a faint acidic aftertaste. So let’s take a dive into this sticky subject, and see the benefits that it offers.

Vaginal/Anal Intake

The vaginal and rectal linings are very absorbent, so either one is a viable route for soaking up the nutrients in your man’s spunk sauce.

Antidepressant

Semen contains quite a few components that have been studied to show anti-depressant qualities. One of these is nerve growth factor. Its primary responsibility in semen is to help relax the female so that the sperm can achieve its reproductive objective. It’s also been shown to be a vital hormone missing in the brains of those who suffer from Major Depressive Disorder. This means that increasing nerve growth factor would only prove to make people happier. Additionally, nerve growth factor has been found to be an anti-inflammatory as well as an antioxidant.

Antianxiety

Semen contains mood-enhancing compounds like oxytocin, progesterone, estrone, serotonin, and melatonin. Oxytocin is also known as the “cuddle hormone” because, when released, it makes people feel more affectionate and connected. Progesterone has been shown to have anti-anxiety characteristics. Estrone piggybacks on serotonin to help enhance moods, and melatonin helps relaxation occur.

Mood Enhancement

A study backed by the SUNY institute found that female college students who received baby batter on a regular basis were happier and less suicidal than those who didn’t. Researchers chalked this up to the mood-enhancing benefits of semen, however, they didn’t take into account any other factors, like a happy home life, being successful in school, or, I don’t know, getting raw D on the reg. Sounds like a pretty good place to be in life, and it sounds a little irresponsible to claim that the happiness of these women was directly dependent upon getting 20 ccs of white gold injected into them without taking any other factors into account. But what do I know? I’m no scientist. I’m just a chick writing a blog post about the benefits of man mayo.

Ingestion

The amount of Google searches for “eating cum” is astounding: a little under 10,000 for the past month, to be exact. In fact, this may have been the route you were thinking of when you initially clicked on this blog post. Lucky for you, we’ve got what you were looking for. Swallowing semen is the quickest way to get all of the benefits of your man’s baby juice, and think, he might even enjoy it too.

Longevity

We know this might be hard to swallow, but yes, semen can make you live longer. Spermidine (originally isolated from sperm, hence the name), when ingested, has been proven to dramatically increase the lifespan of animals by as much as 25 percent. In the same study, it was also found to prevent liver disease as well as liver cancer.

Cognitive Functioning

Nerve growth factor does a lot for the body. In addition to being an antidepressant, an anti-inflammatory, and an antioxidant, it’s also known to help stop the brain from aging. Nerve growth factor, which is very abundant in semen, is vital for maintaining the brain’s neurons. Neurons process and transmit information; they’re what make your brain work. Survival of these neurons is essential for you to have a working brain! Who knew that giving brain could affect your brain in such a positive way?

Nutritional Benefits

Have you recently taken a vitamin deficiency test (maybe on HealthLabs.com), and found that you were lacking in a few vital nutrients? Well get a spoon and ask your man for a plate of some nut butter, because semen is chock full of zinc, potassium, magnesium, calcium, and citrate. The nutrients get absorbed in your body like a less expensive vitamin shot (see ya later, Jamba Juice).

Topical

This might come as a surprise to you, but semen not only benefits the inside of your body but the outside as well. That’s right, with the amounts of zinc, vitamin c, and spermidine in your dude’s jizz, you could open up your own skincare line (this statement has not been evaluated by the FDA).

Teeth

Looking for an alternative, all-natural teeth whitening solution? Forget the charcoal; check out your man’s chubby. Although it’s not the white paste you’re used to putting on your toothbrush, semen has loads of zinc in it, which is a natural teeth whitener. Zinc’s seminal job is to aid the sperm’s survival. But that doesn’t mean that it can’t also aid the survival of your pearly whites.

Hair

Have you heard of a keratin treatment? Basically, you pay someone hundreds of dollars to put protein in your hair to make it stronger. Well, did you know that there’s a source of protein that you probably haven’t considered? Semen has over 200 different kinds of protein in it which can give your hair the strength and shine that it so desperately needs.

Semen also contains spermidine, which, when used on human scalps, has been shown to promote shaft elongation (LOL) as well as prolonged hair growth. Even though semen may be the one thing that you’ve actively tried to keep out of your hair, go ahead and consider this DIY hair treatment the next time you want to give your hair some life (get it?).

Skin

Spermidine is back, baby! In addition to increasing longevity and aiding in healthy hair, spermidine is an antioxidant and is great for the skin. It’s believed to smooth skin, lessen wrinkles, and even diminish acne. In fact, companies sell spermidine-derived facial cream for upwards of $200! If you’re not looking to spend that money, a money shot would be a cheaper and more natural alternative.

Injaculation

Let’s say you’re a man reading this blog post, and your partner doesn’t have a penis, or your penis-wielding partner isn’t willing to give you a nice, cold glass of man milk, so the only readily available source of semen is your own. You should be able to get some seminal rewards too! Sure, go ahead and smear it on your face and in your hair, but does the thought of drinking your own kool-aid or shooting it up your butt disgust and terrify you in ways that you’ve never felt before? Not to fear! There’s a way for you to utilize your own love juice, and it involves loving yourself.

Injaculation, or “retrograde ejaculation” is the process of releasing your semen inside your own body. When nearing close to an ejaculation, instead of allowing the splooge and all of its benefits land on an ungrateful sock, you release it in retrograde, or back inside of your body. It may sound painful or unnatural, but it’s not. Taoists have practiced injaculating for thousands of years, as well as certain sects of Buddhism, Hinduism, and even ancient Egyptians! So go on, show yourself some love.

Things to Remember

Now you know the different ways you can use that baby batter to your benefit, but there are a few things you should keep in mind before diving face-first into a vat of high fructose porn syrup.

Secure and Confidential STD testing services

The fastest results possbile – available in 1 to 2 days

GET TESTED TODAY

You can be allergic to semen. Before you go smearing it on your skin or guzzling it down like the thirsty thirst trap you are, know that there is an allergy called Human Seminal Plasma Protein Hypersensitivity. It can lead to an allergic reaction including itching, wheezing, hives, chest tightness, and difficulty breathing.

Though semen contains tons and tons of benefits, remember that it doesn’t come in huge quantities (~ 1 tsp). You would need to use a lot of semen to see most of the results. So, if you’re only using that baby formula for the benefits, you might be disappointed. Instead, we implore you to enjoy the nut butter for what it is and see the benefits as an added incentive.

Finally, and this is really, truly, the most important part: Make sure your source of semen is STD-free! You will do a lot more harm than good if you pour infected liquid gold all over your body. Let your man know that you’re interested in benefiting from his groin gravy, but he needs to get tested first.

*Remember, you can get STDs from oral sex, anal sex, and getting sex fluids in your eyes!*

And if you’re interested in learning more about the specific components of semen, check out our post on What’s Semen Made of.

Medically Reviewed by J. Frank Martin JR., MD on October 2, 2018

from knowmystatus.life https://ift.tt/2pfpcZR via IFTTT

[herpesstdsymptoms]

9 Proven Benefits of Semen that will Blow your Mind

9 Proven Benefits of Semen that will Blow your Mind

Ah milk. The Dairy Council spends billions of dollars each year promoting the benefits of this cold, white drink. But have you ever wondered about the benefits of man milk? Yes, you read that correctly, man milk, aka semen. 

As crazy as it sounds, semen has a multitude of benefits stemming from the minerals and nutrients it contains, and those seminal benefits can be passed directly on to you. That’s right; we did the research and now we’re here to present you with the facts.

Perhaps you’ve recently swallowed some baby gravy, or you enjoy drinking that man milk routinely. Regardless, you’re looking to find out if this creamy substance will provide you with anything more than a slightly sour stomach and a faint acidic aftertaste. So let’s take a dive into this sticky subject, and see the benefits that it offers.

Vaginal/Anal Intake

The vaginal and rectal linings are very absorbent, so either one is a viable route for soaking up the nutrients in your man’s spunk sauce.

Antidepressant

Semen contains quite a few components that have been studied to show anti-depressant qualities. One of these is nerve growth factor. Its primary responsibility in semen is to help relax the female so that the sperm can achieve its reproductive objective. It’s also been shown to be a vital hormone missing in the brains of those who suffer from Major Depressive Disorder. This means that increasing nerve growth factor would only prove to make people happier. Additionally, nerve growth factor has been found to be an anti-inflammatory as well as an antioxidant.

Antianxiety

Semen contains mood-enhancing compounds like oxytocin, progesterone, estrone, serotonin, and melatonin. Oxytocin is also known as the “cuddle hormone” because, when released, it makes people feel more affectionate and connected. Progesterone has been shown to have anti-anxiety characteristics. Estrone piggybacks on serotonin to help enhance moods, and melatonin helps relaxation occur.

Mood Enhancement

A study backed by the SUNY institute found that female college students who received baby batter on a regular basis were happier and less suicidal than those who didn’t. Researchers chalked this up to the mood-enhancing benefits of semen, however, they didn’t take into account any other factors, like a happy home life, being successful in school, or, I don’t know, getting raw D on the reg. Sounds like a pretty good place to be in life, and it sounds a little irresponsible to claim that the happiness of these women was directly dependent upon getting 20 ccs of white gold injected into them without taking any other factors into account. But what do I know? I’m no scientist. I’m just a chick writing a blog post about the benefits of man mayo.

Ingestion

The amount of Google searches for “eating cum” is astounding: a little under 10,000 for the past month, to be exact. In fact, this may have been the route you were thinking of when you initially clicked on this blog post. Lucky for you, we’ve got what you were looking for. Swallowing semen is the quickest way to get all of the benefits of your man’s baby juice, and think, he might even enjoy it too.

Longevity

We know this might be hard to swallow, but yes, semen can make you live longer. Spermidine (originally isolated from sperm, hence the name), when ingested, has been proven to dramatically increase the lifespan of animals by as much as 25 percent. In the same study, it was also found to prevent liver disease as well as liver cancer.

Cognitive Functioning

Nerve growth factor does a lot for the body. In addition to being an antidepressant, an anti-inflammatory, and an antioxidant, it’s also known to help stop the brain from aging. Nerve growth factor, which is very abundant in semen, is vital for maintaining the brain’s neurons. Neurons process and transmit information; they’re what make your brain work. Survival of these neurons is essential for you to have a working brain! Who knew that giving brain could affect your brain in such a positive way?

Nutritional Benefits

Have you recently taken a vitamin deficiency test (maybe on HealthLabs.com), and found that you were lacking in a few vital nutrients? Well get a spoon and ask your man for a plate of some nut butter, because semen is chock full of zinc, potassium, magnesium, calcium, and citrate. The nutrients get absorbed in your body like a less expensive vitamin shot (see ya later, Jamba Juice).

Topical

This might come as a surprise to you, but semen not only benefits the inside of your body but the outside as well. That’s right, with the amounts of zinc, vitamin c, and spermidine in your dude’s jizz, you could open up your own skincare line (this statement has not been evaluated by the FDA).

Teeth

Looking for an alternative, all-natural teeth whitening solution? Forget the charcoal; check out your man’s chubby. Although it’s not the white paste you’re used to putting on your toothbrush, semen has loads of zinc in it, which is a natural teeth whitener. Zinc’s seminal job is to aid the sperm’s survival. But that doesn’t mean that it can’t also aid the survival of your pearly whites.

Hair

Have you heard of a keratin treatment? Basically, you pay someone hundreds of dollars to put protein in your hair to make it stronger. Well, did you know that there’s a source of protein that you probably haven’t considered? Semen has over 200 different kinds of protein in it which can give your hair the strength and shine that it so desperately needs.

Semen also contains spermidine, which, when used on human scalps, has been shown to promote shaft elongation (LOL) as well as prolonged hair growth. Even though semen may be the one thing that you’ve actively tried to keep out of your hair, go ahead and consider this DIY hair treatment the next time you want to give your hair some life (get it?).

Skin

Spermidine is back, baby! In addition to increasing longevity and aiding in healthy hair, spermidine is an antioxidant and is great for the skin. It’s believed to smooth skin, lessen wrinkles, and even diminish acne. In fact, companies sell spermidine-derived facial cream for upwards of $200! If you’re not looking to spend that money, a money shot would be a cheaper and more natural alternative.

Injaculation

Let’s say you’re a man reading this blog post, and your partner doesn’t have a penis, or your penis-wielding partner isn’t willing to give you a nice, cold glass of man milk, so the only readily available source of semen is your own. You should be able to get some seminal rewards too! Sure, go ahead and smear it on your face and in your hair, but does the thought of drinking your own kool-aid or shooting it up your butt disgust and terrify you in ways that you’ve never felt before? Not to fear! There’s a way for you to utilize your own love juice, and it involves loving yourself.

Injaculation, or “retrograde ejaculation” is the process of releasing your semen inside your own body. When nearing close to an ejaculation, instead of allowing the splooge and all of its benefits land on an ungrateful sock, you release it in retrograde, or back inside of your body. It may sound painful or unnatural, but it’s not. Taoists have practiced injaculating for thousands of years, as well as certain sects of Buddhism, Hinduism, and even ancient Egyptians! So go on, show yourself some love.

Things to Remember

Now you know the different ways you can use that baby batter to your benefit, but there are a few things you should keep in mind before diving face-first into a vat of high fructose porn syrup.

Secure and Confidential STD testing services

The fastest results possbile – available in 1 to 2 days

GET TESTED TODAY

You can be allergic to semen. Before you go smearing it on your skin or guzzling it down like the thirsty thirst trap you are, know that there is an allergy called Human Seminal Plasma Protein Hypersensitivity. It can lead to an allergic reaction including itching, wheezing, hives, chest tightness, and difficulty breathing.

Though semen contains tons and tons of benefits, remember that it doesn’t come in huge quantities (~ 1 tsp). You would need to use a lot of semen to see most of the results. So, if you’re only using that baby formula for the benefits, you might be disappointed. Instead, we implore you to enjoy the nut butter for what it is and see the benefits as an added incentive.

Finally, and this is really, truly, the most important part: Make sure your source of semen is STD-free! You will do a lot more harm than good if you pour infected liquid gold all over your body. Let your man know that you’re interested in benefiting from his groin gravy, but he needs to get tested first.

*Remember, you can get STDs from oral sex, anal sex, and getting sex fluids in your eyes!*

And if you’re interested in learning more about the specific components of semen, check out our post on What’s Semen Made of.

Medically Reviewed by J. Frank Martin JR., MD on October 2, 2018

from knowmystatus.life https://ift.tt/2pfpcZR via IFTTT