#this is in part inpspired by having such a hard time finding people who really share my interests.....
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at this point i feel certain that there never will be anyone who truly understands me
#like yes i have great friends and they are so sweet and there for me#but i remember quite vividly how as a teen i felt i had this.... heart that needed connections it could never find#and for some reason i told myself no you're like other people surely you'll find a place you belong eventually#and forgot about it a little#but now again i feel like... there's this big part of me my thinking my feeling my existing in this world#that is so strange so far removed from others and no one is like this no one will understand it#this is in part inpspired by having such a hard time finding people who really share my interests.....#because WHEN i do (and of course it happens i am pretty basic in this regard)#they function and exist on an entirely different wavelength that i cannot access and don't know how to pretend#...and then sometimes there's people who i feel understand some part of it all#and they come around with their intentions..... and it's never the possibility for a true connection it's always.... based in#i don't know.... their superificial interest in me as a young broken woman...... i don't know this is a very strange part of it
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